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The Good Kinda Dumb (Primal Rage: The Avatars - Part 1) image

The Good Kinda Dumb (Primal Rage: The Avatars - Part 1)

Pixel Lit
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352 Plays16 days ago

This book is really stupid, in many ways but also we are here for it?

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Book Synopsis

As Necrosan and his undead armies lay waste to Urth, the Avatars struggle to free their imprisoned dino-god masters and must overcome personal differences in order to defeat their common enemy.

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Transcript
00:00:00
Speaker
No, the gal kill count ah that that cat ah on. I eulogized him on Instagram and and my final hope for him on the other side of the Rainbow Bridge was that wherever he is, I hope that the rodent population tells stories about him to their children to frighten them at night. Yeah.
00:00:22
Speaker
but but i hope I hope the afterlife is just one infinite villain phase for him. I hope that for him. He he deserves that. He's earned that. um um Fucking cat.
00:00:42
Speaker
That cat. um You know, Ross is a cat. Who's that? Hey there, everybody. Welcome back to Pixel It. My name is Kevin. With me as it always is Phil. And on today's show, ah we're doing Primal Rage, the avatars. Oh, baby. Oh, baby.
00:01:00
Speaker
Oh, baby. oh Yeah. So this is a book. ah This is a book. This is indeed a book. Yes. yeah This is a book in that it is printed on paper with ink and bound.
00:01:19
Speaker
with I'm assuming a glue yeah there's a there's it's a glue binding glue yeah probably the same stuff that they were huffing when they were writing it yeah adhesive and uh it's got a cover and it's got full quotes yep and it's got a it's got a it's got a author uh it does So before we get into the book more, let me just tell you about the game.
00:01:49
Speaker
ah Primal Rage i came out in 1994. For those of you who are unaware, this was the peak of peak era of just like, fuck it. It's a fighting game.
00:02:01
Speaker
um this is This is after the Mortal Kombat shit had gotten everyone all up in arms and they made zillion dollars and video companies learned the wrong lesson. Right. it's like It's like, you know, fighting games, you had your street fighters, you had your... You had your Neo Geo, ah your SNK Capcom fighting games. final And then, you know, Mortal Kombat comes in and kind of turns everything on its head. And then you just have fucking fighting games that are just. So Primal Rage is basically it's ah
00:02:37
Speaker
it's Rampage, but a fighting game. Yeah. yeah I mean, honestly, I hadn't thought about that, but you're absolutely right. That's exactly what it is. yeah It's post-apocalyptic Earth. ah The dinosaurs, they're back. ah one of the One of the characters is a Yeti, ah and they are it the modeling in it, I believe it they did that thing where they used the... um It's almost like a it's always like a claymation style. Yeah,
00:03:12
Speaker
yeah ah Yeah. It's a troll of some kind. Yeah, it's sort of, it's vaguely reminiscent of like Donkey Kong Country where it's like, yeah, it's, it's on the Super Nintendo yet it still has three d modeled graphics because the way they did it for like Donkey Kong Country is they, they are 3d graphics, 3d models. It's just that they did like snapshots of each pose and then use, use those to animate it Um,
00:03:45
Speaker
So, yeah, anyway, Primal Rage, it's a game that it's just been in the back of my head for a while. Not sure I ever played it or if I, it's like, did I, might have rented it?
00:03:59
Speaker
You know, might have done a rental, might have played it in the arcade. ah It just kind of exists back there, but never really ah cared much about it.
00:04:11
Speaker
um And now we're reading the book, but it it was a game by Atari, by the way. Atari. Yes. yes And it came out to, the on the review scores, it came out to, I mean, mostly mediocre reviews.
00:04:28
Speaker
Right. it was It was very much for a specific subset of fighting fans like this Kaiju fighter thing. They were never going to get all of the Street Fighter kids, the Mortal Kombat kids. but I remember because I i was a a religious devotee of magazines like GamePro and Electronic Gaming Monthly and stuff like that. And i remember one of them had a cover, had cover art that was a screenshot of one out of the monkeys like uppercutting one of the dinosaurs and just this gore splattering everywhere. And...
00:05:06
Speaker
And it was like, holy shit, ah this game looks insane. and And there was a cabinet of it ah in ah the military arcade ah that had like half a dozen games and and most of them were very old, but they happened to have Primal Rage. And so I actually did play a little Primal Rage. I don't remember it. yeah I don't remember it. I love the design. I don't remember the gameplay being any good. At least didn't stick with me.
00:05:35
Speaker
Yeah, and a lot of times I would but get it confused with um Bloody Roar. oh shit, you Bloody Roar.
00:05:48
Speaker
I haven't thought of that forever. That was the one where like the fighters had like human and beast forms. and That was the furry one, yeah. Yeah, that was the furry one. um Yeah.
00:06:01
Speaker
Holy shit, I haven't thought of this forever. Look at those polygons. Oh, Look at those polygons. Just beautiful. what a what a What a time to be alive. What a time to be a game. time to be alive.
00:06:13
Speaker
but There's five bloody war games. Jesus. Yeah, they met bunch them, didn't they? Well, all within within five years of each other. God, gaming just used to be.
00:06:25
Speaker
Wow. but
00:06:32
Speaker
this used to be This used to be an industry, my friend. They used to give it used to be a shit. This used to be a proper industry. My God.
00:06:44
Speaker
Oh, that's funny. Bloody Roar 4, the final game in the series, released 2003. The first one came out in 1997, so six years between the first one.
00:06:55
Speaker
The first one and the last one. Jesus Christ. That's funny. Just cranking them out, baby. um feel like Bloody Roar, you know, with with the greater popularity of of furries and all that, i feel like Bloody Roar should is due for a comeback, right? I think you're right. I'm looking at this. and This is... um I'm looking at some pixel art. I don't think this is official, ah but like it's old fashioned pixel art style. and Some of these designs are pretty fucking kick ass. I don't know if this is from the actual game or this is the dude's or chick's interpretation of this, but it was this is fucking crazy.
00:07:39
Speaker
I might have to find a way to play this. I'm going to find out I'm a furry, aren't i I mean, it comes for us all eventually. Yeah, no, that's true.
00:07:53
Speaker
um Phil, who the fuck wrote this book? This book was written by John Vornholt. The John Vornholt. ah
00:08:05
Speaker
You know, though. ah we've we we are We get a lot of, we we've got styles of for hire writers on this on this show. We've got, you know, um the old pros who get kind of dragged into it every now and then. We've got people who were already involved somehow in making game. game somehow and and and and so they just go ahead and write it. um But by far the most populous a style of writer we have is what Mr. Volnhorst is and that is a goddamn work for hire mercenary ah adapt adaptation writer. Yeah, yeah he let's see. All right.
00:08:48
Speaker
ah He did the YA version of the adaptation of Final Fantasy The Spirits Within. We might have to look into that. We might have to look into that.
00:08:59
Speaker
ah He did two Buffy and Angel books. Mm-hmm. Three Dinotopia books. just Shit ton of Star Trek books. Here's the crazy thing about... All right, so um my wife has been pushing us to like interview more authors that are just like out there, regardless of their association with video game adaptations or not. And one of the authors, and I'm i'm forgetting the gentleman's name, but ah he's one of the things he would did the adaptation for was the ah first episode of Star Trek.
00:09:33
Speaker
And I was like, well, what do you mean the first episode of Star Trek? were like, well, the reason there's so many fucking Star Trek books is that some episodes would just get adapted into novels. Oh.
00:09:44
Speaker
Oh. Like, there's just episodes and then there's like the other, there's the Star Trek novels. There's just so many Star Trek books out there. But it's like, was like, she's, because she bought it. She's like, oh, this kind of interesting, right? And was like, Encounter at Farpoint, that's a pilot episode. This is just a fucking, this is a book version.
00:10:06
Speaker
This is just a book version of Encounter at Farpoint. It's so funny. Yeah, he wrote, I mean, he wrote, ah he wrote the ah movie adaptations of a lot of their, a lot of the movies they did. Star Trek Generations, First a Nemesis.
00:10:26
Speaker
that Nemesis.
00:10:29
Speaker
No, that was an episode of the TV show. Yeah. Nemesis was the one with the ah fucking fucking who who's the guy. It's like the the Romulan clone of Picard or something like that.
00:10:45
Speaker
Isn't that it? Yeah, I think it is. Riker and Dan Troy. Yeah, yeah. It's Tom Hardy in as the Romulan villain. Right, right.
00:10:58
Speaker
Yeah. Shit. That is so funny. um I remember that being one of the those movies that I was like coming out of and like, hey, don't think I like movies anymore.
00:11:10
Speaker
I don't think I don't know if this is for me. Maybe I should. Find some other hobby. i i will I will draw our attention to the thing that I'm sure you clocked almost immediately, though. He wrote ah episodes of the TV version of Ghostbusters. Yes, he sure did. Not just any Ghostbusters.
00:11:32
Speaker
the The not real Ghostbusters. The not real Ghostbusters. That's right. That's right. The other Ghostbusters cartoon. The are other Ghostbusters. That's what he wrote for.
00:11:44
Speaker
i had the I had toys from that cartoon as well. and That was just Ghostbusters. And there was like, what? The fucking ape? And the car?
00:11:57
Speaker
And I don't remember. like The fact that there was a cartoon called Ghostbusters that came out after the movie Ghostbusters that is unrelated to the movie Ghostbusters, which caused the cartoon of the cartoon series that is it acted as a continuation of the movie have to be titled The Real Ghostbusters yeah is amazing.
00:12:26
Speaker
Yeah, I think I think that might be ah for me and ah and and a lot of kids at the time, our first example of that kind of behind the scenes drama and being fully aware of it. We all knew why.
00:12:43
Speaker
It was called The Real Ghostbusters. We were all clued in. No matter how young we were, we knew that that that that that there were were the the adults were fighting over who got to be Ghostbusters. And that cracks me the fuck up. So, yeah. So yeah wrote he wrote for that show.
00:13:00
Speaker
That one jumped at me immediately. The rest these, The New Adventures of He-Man 1990, Dennis the Menace in 86. dennis the menace in eighty six i do i did watch that.
00:13:11
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. All right. The success of Columbia's unrelated film spurred Film Nation filmation to resurrect their own property, producing an animated series based on the characters from the earlier TV show.
00:13:24
Speaker
The animated series ran from September 8th to December 5th in the daytime and produced 65 episodes. Goddamn animated cartoons animated series just used to crank out episodes didn't they? I didn't know it had that goddamn many that's crazy 65 it's like we're gonna run it for one year 65 episodes right right exactly like whereas you've gotta have like four or five seasons to make syndication with you know a live action television show that's crazy yeah yeah they also did the adventures of super mario brothers 3
00:13:59
Speaker
Oh, that's fun. That's fun. Good for him. Um... um Well, what do you say we ah put this body in the marsh? What do you say?
00:14:11
Speaker
ah You know, we can. We should. And we will. But first, I got to tell you about a stop on the way to the marsh. There's a place in the marsh. There's ah there's a there's a gas station by the marsh.
00:14:23
Speaker
ah It's called Patrico Patreon. Patreon.com slash... pixel-it pod, ah where you can go and give us money, and in return, we give you fuel.
00:14:41
Speaker
um The fuel of life, that is, so to speak. oh yeah. ah Not real gas. That shit's too expensive. um So $1, $5, $10, or you can just follow us for free.
00:14:55
Speaker
ah Just come along and and and give us the ah the old checkaruno. ah We take checks. No, we don't take checks. Do not send a check. um But yeah, for $10, you get your name shouted out in every episode. And to that end, I want to thank And You Are Hiding, Song 85, Jesus Loves You, Ruthless Mudder, Middle of Things, Sigma Sal, s Sanguine Flatulence, Shia Lude, Chak, Beaks, Demeth, Vic, and Friendly Friend. Thank you so much for being a friend.
00:15:22
Speaker
patreon.com slash pixel of how to do it today. Excellent. All right. We're marching this body. Let's march the body and the body is is going to come back ah millions of years later after a meteor event.
00:15:39
Speaker
yeah And then we're going jump forward like a thousand years. yeah ah The good thing about putting the body in the marsh is that it will be perfectly preserved a millennia later for ah generations of anthropologists and and just otherwise history geeks to observe and and theory theorize it.
00:16:00
Speaker
um And it's the fact that it's a giant ape will you know not seek them out. Exactly. Okay. When I tell you to dump a body in the marsh, you them in the marsh.
00:16:15
Speaker
In the mind. Primal Rage, the avatars, chapter one. We start with Blizzard, the god of the yetis. He's the big blue monkey. um He is fighting Talon, who's like the velociraptor god. These are all gods, by the way. The the the giant kaiju creatures are all gods. They're all gods and they're all immortal.
00:16:39
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. I don't think they can. it's it They make pretty clear early on ah Mr. Vornholt makes it clear early on that they can't die, but they fight. Right.
00:16:52
Speaker
which yeah, I guess i I mean, that's the, it's all you can do at that point. Right? Like it's just, yeah, you're bored for fucking eons. ah So you start walloping each other. So there's been yeah. So blizzard's beating up Talon, who is a giant velociraptor style God and Diablo, who is a which one's Diablo's Diablo, the T-Rex, one of the T-Rexes.
00:17:18
Speaker
ah Yeah, I guess so. I mean, I kind of disassociated at certain points. Yeah, we had we had ah it's which is understandable. ah We had ah just like a lot of games in those days. Primer Rage had ah the um what do you call it? The color, ah the two characters that are identical, except their colors were different. Scorpion. Oh, yeah. zero The palette, the palette swap characters. Thank you.
00:17:48
Speaker
Yeah, you got your scorpion, your Sub-Zero, your reptile, ah your smoke. yeah yeah Yeah, yeah. oh those 15,000 ninja characters in Mortal Kombat, you know? Oh my God, it just kept going. ah But in this case, we only have two sets of two. One of them are Diablo, the red and black Tyrannosaurus Rex and Sauron, the yellow and I want to say purple Tyrannosaurus Rex. Yes.
00:18:13
Speaker
yeah um Then we've got the two giant apes, ah Blizzard, the ice monkey, and ah Chaos, the poop monkey, who we will get to ah momentarily.
00:18:27
Speaker
So this immediately starts out ah with them having a battle. ah It's meant to be a day of reckoning. If you're immortal and you can't die, I don't see how that's even possible, but whatever. Yeah.
00:18:42
Speaker
This is, this is like, it is, it is 1986 hair metal cheese. And by the time that, cause you're sitting there going, are we going to just be watching these mute animals fight each other? Right. but No, no.
00:19:00
Speaker
The author very quickly just says the one character speaks to the other one using mind language. Right. Mind language.
00:19:11
Speaker
That's the whole thing. just And that's it. The whole thing is explaining. it He just used my language. Okay, gotcha. And it was at this point. My wayward Tyrannosaurus Rex. Exactly. Well, at this point, this is like one of six moments for this first third where I thought, you know what? Fuck it. I am in.
00:19:30
Speaker
I am in whole hog for this shit. This is this is the stupidest shit. Rook was, is, is illustrated through a laser light show that you see at the observatory. Yes, it's, that's exactly it. Yes. They're a three minute song with four guitar solos. That's what this is. And it's just, it's beatily beatily be all the way up and down. It's so dumb. And the thing is, unlike, cause we've looked, we read a lot of stupid shit that we don't enjoy. And I think the key difference here is that John Vorholt, Vorholt knows what he's writing. He is, he's like, Oh, this is stupid. Got it.
00:20:15
Speaker
Yeah, I can do that. This is fucking dumb. Okay, I mean, yeah, like and he John Vornholdt like looked down at the at the the brief or whatever he got.
00:20:26
Speaker
And then he looked up and he saw Frank for Zeta poster like on his wall. He's like, I know what I must do. What if I made Conan the Barbarian stegosaurus? It's just fucking insane. So, so yeah. And you get that throughout the book. This is a dumb book. It is, it is, it is a very dumb book and I think I fucking love it. I haven't decided yet.
00:20:55
Speaker
ah buts So out of nowhere, the fight's happening. i don't know where a dude, a human, a dude, ah a wizard outfit comes out.
00:21:05
Speaker
And that's literally how there's like he's he's wearing like Merlin robes. ah It's like your uncle describing D and D. Uh, you know, he, he was jogging in the park and he saw a bunch of LARPers he was like, oh, he's, he's wearing the Elfie ears. You know, it's that kind of thing. It's got the, he's got a hat and it's yeah pointy and it's got stars on it. And right. Exactly.
00:21:26
Speaker
Exactly. Exactly. Uh, and so he just pops up out of nowhere and he just whoops everyone's ass with the power of magic. Uh, uh, this is, this is our introduction to Balsafus, uh,
00:21:42
Speaker
Great name. Fair notes. Balsifus. Balsifus. um It's, yeah.
00:21:53
Speaker
I knew what was happening when I was reading it, but that was literally the first time I ever said the name out loud and it made it 50 times better. Yeah.
00:22:04
Speaker
No notes. ah it's so yeah So the the the gay porn parody of Last of Us.
00:22:15
Speaker
The balls of us. boss of us. I love it. I love it. Oh man. know that's That's it. That's actually, that's actually onward bulls X pen name.
00:22:32
Speaker
Letting the dog out.
00:22:36
Speaker
Boy, you got to let the dog out, baby. And he gets so upset. Sometimes he just like sits at the door. and He's like, I want to be let out of this office right now.
00:22:47
Speaker
And I'm like, honey just can you just chill for like, just just go to sleep for another, just pass out for another 45 minutes and we found all we'll be fine. But here's something off in the distance.
00:23:01
Speaker
you'll time warp ahead but no he he has to he has to be out and he has to be out right now he's got important things to do uh he does there's people walking by the house and he can't have that he oh god no no no no no i didn't i you didn't mention that that's that's a horse of a different color that's totally different uh he goes to uh see a horse about a people um
00:23:30
Speaker
ah So Balsafis, I'm never going to not enjoy that. ah He tells them that he is from another dimension. And they've been watching ah these dinosaurs fuck up this world earth, which is earth, but spelled U R T H. ah Welcome to earth.
00:23:51
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. It's, it's metal, man. It's fucking nineties earth. um Yeah. it It really is one of those nineties goddamn things. um So he, he tells it, you guys have been fucking up.
00:24:05
Speaker
Now humans are going to run the show ah for the mammals and the insects to get a shot. Yeah. And he just like fucks their day up.
00:24:15
Speaker
Yeah. He interrupts the war. it's He gets kind of sassy with them, too. Yeah. Like he just it's it's not it's it's again, it's very 90s. It's like it's that kind of he's looking at the camera.
00:24:28
Speaker
It's like, ah you guys have been fucking up. So now. It's the human's chance. Am I right? You know it's like Captain Planet. it yeah it's It's very silly. ah So he banishes all the Dino and Yeti gods ah to different places.
00:24:49
Speaker
ah It's kind of hilarious because one of them is named Vertigo and she is this like, she's probably the only one in the bunch that doesn't have a direct character. animal to kind of base it on because she's like a cobra, but she's got arms and it's weird.
00:25:07
Speaker
Uh, and she's gigantic and, uh, sure. She, she does the hypnotized thing. That's her whole shtick. Um, and he says, he starts with her and he says, you're, know, you, you, uh,
00:25:18
Speaker
What is this? Like, no one knows how cold ah you could be except for you. So you will be on the moon. and Gives that explanation and blips her up to the moon. And then the rest of me just goes, and you're going to over here and you're going to over here and you're going to be he' just, you didn't have the energy to keep it going. Yeah.
00:25:36
Speaker
Ran out of steam immediately. Yeah. And it's like, ah hey, Yeti man, ah yeah i'm I'm saving you for last because you are the erstwhile main character, I guess. Yeah. He's our good guy.
00:25:50
Speaker
um Good guy. Yeah. Good guy. constantly killing but feels bad about it. Right. Right. neutral good i don't know uh so they're going to be held they're basically held in stasis in different places uh while time passes and a shitload of time passes and that's basically our explanation for what happened to the dinosaurs uh they they were put in stasis by a wizard named balsafus Balsafis. Balsafis did it.
00:26:24
Speaker
ah You know, it goes, you know, Mesozoic era, ah Jurassic era, Balsafis era. Balsafis era. I think I don't think I got anything right in that last sentence.
00:26:39
Speaker
Somebody will tell us. Someone will tell us. Yeah. ah Hope you guys like time travel because chapter two, we are traveling forward. i don't know, seven or eight million years. And we are following day to present to kind of present day. Yeah. And so we've got Marty, yeah who's a cabbie in New York City, and he's trying to survive while meteors just destroy the fucking world. It's the apocalypse.
00:27:07
Speaker
The greatest part of this chapter happens pretty early on. And it was my second instance of fuck it. I'm all in. And it's when he describes this beautiful woman running around and she says, screaming, if I'm going to die, i need a man.
00:27:23
Speaker
And just literally going around and like, she's, um, Lena the Hyena from goddamn Roger Rabbit. She's just like kissing people and trying to get them to kiss her. at it's Yeah, and he's like he's like, Marty, it was too slow to take her take up her offer or whatever. She already had a line of men to smooch. Right, right. She had this crowd. And like he literally describes at some point that it's just kind of ah a fucking pile. like like The grossest cuddle bottle ever. It's just...
00:27:55
Speaker
So that's also a moment where I was like, oh he knows what he's fucking doing. Cause we've run into, you know, we read these older books and you, it, it, you don't necessarily think about it in the nineties cause you're living it, but we read a lot of these books and so some of the shit doesn't ah translate. Well, it hasn't aged. Well, um yeah, especially when it comes to women, um this is so over the top that it's basically impossible to read that part and think that he's being serious. He's not.
00:28:28
Speaker
ah It's just the stupidest shit and it's hilarious. And in my notes, I write, I think I love this book. Misspellings. Right. Because there are a lot of misspellings. That's that's another thing.
00:28:40
Speaker
I don't know if anyone actually edited this. ah They may have just taken his his draft and been like, yeah, great, fine. Right out of the word processor, like, he was either, I'm going to, well, what, it was 1995. Okay, he was using a PC at this time. It wasn't it wouldn't have been a word processor. those But he was probably using like Lotus Works or some goddamn thing. Lotus Works, Lotus, yeah. And, ah you know, it was fresh off the dot matrix.
00:29:07
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, exactly. Yeah. Just peeling off the perforated edges. yeah I used to love that. kids and Let me tell you something about dot matrix printers.
00:29:20
Speaker
um Actually, i don't have and I don't really have the the dot matrix ah lore to to get into a rant about dot matrix printers. you It's just like you don't understand what you're missing out on when everything you printed had to be put through a printer where it was this ah hole and hook kind of pulley system that pulled the paper along. And if you yeah had it off by a fraction of a millimeter, it fucked everything up because it was just printing in the same place. But it God forbid, if you actually got it right and your document is printed out, then you've got to ah tear.
00:29:59
Speaker
the perforated, like whole edges off the sides of the paper and it has a wubbly bubbly bumpy kind of side to it. I wouldn't be surprised if there were more expensive dot matrix printers that auto tour the like auto removed the, the perforations. Oh, that would be nice. Not in my house. We never, not, not in my house. No, not um but let me tell you something.
00:30:25
Speaker
Uh, the dot matrix printer was the unrivaled goat for printing banners. ah the the The number of banners that we used as a family ah took a precipitive precipitous dive once we went to like an inkjet printer. Dude. Oh, this shit is still around. You can buy it.
00:30:50
Speaker
Oh my God, look at this. I'm pretty sure this is the one I had. This is nuts. Okay, anyway. Okay.
00:30:59
Speaker
ah When did Walmart's website start carrying Timu shit? Like this is ridiculous. Anyway. ah So this is happening. The world is ending and ah Marty meets Sauron, who honestly might be one of the more interesting gods in the story. We don't get a lot of time with him, but he's one of the only ones that we meet where it's he's the God of hunger.
00:31:24
Speaker
ah His character trait is that he is constantly hungry. It's hunger, not fear. Yeah, right. Exactly. Exactly. we he he He went 50. He said he need 50% of that off. i don't I don't have. Yeah. He don't have room for the fear. I don't have room fear. Just hunger. Yeah.
00:31:41
Speaker
Yeah. So, so Sauron is coming out and just eating every body because apparently this meteor ah shower has like released the gods. And ah like a lot of people would, I think if they were in this position, Marty ah sees Sauron and says, oh, that's my God.
00:32:02
Speaker
Okay. Awesome. And he has a religious awakening. Uh, yeah. And, and, and he becomes, he like becomes Sauron's first follower.
00:32:15
Speaker
And, and the book actually says that, cause we're never going to see Marty again, but the book tells us that he is going to be remembered for hundreds and thousands of years as some sort of saint among Sauron's followers. And it's very canticle for Leibovitz. There's something very, ah very clever about, I really liked that. I was like, cause it's like two or three sentences. And I fucking loved that detail. I thought like this cabbie, uh, is going to be remembered as this saint, uh, because he was the first follower. St. Marty.
00:32:52
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. St. Marty. That's exactly it. Patriot state of cabs. ah And damn, these dot matrix printers still, they look like they're from the 80s still. this is yeah i was just Yeah, I was looking at a few. like these This is pretty much what I had in my house, like I'm looking at here.
00:33:12
Speaker
These Okedana. ah yeah I love that aesthetic I am oh man I don't know kind of i a little white plastic makes me feel makes me feel like home it's nice it's it's it is it nice it's the comfort food of technology it's the comfort food of technology hey Martin oh yeah yeah ah so Blizzard remember we got a hero Blizzard escapes from his bonds and he ends up in Tibet
00:33:44
Speaker
ah where he meets a shepherd. ah He promptly eats the shepherd's sheep, um ah but Kai ah is the shepherd and and he names him his ah first shaman, basically. So this is where we're realizing that like the gods are coming alive and they basically just deputize the first human being that they see.
00:34:10
Speaker
ah right you just want to go guys maybe if you gave it a minute you might find some even more quality you find it we're like no marty and kai they are the best marty marty and kai uh but that's their that's their mo and that's that's their gods they would know better than us i suppose ah chapter three, it is a thousand years later.
00:34:34
Speaker
ah i' I'm going to try and pronounce his name. Kaze Koriyama. It's K-A-Z-E. And I don't know how that's done. I'm just going to say Kaze. um So Kaze Koriyama is this priest of Blizzard. He's addressing a bunch of kids during their ah children's festival.
00:34:53
Speaker
um It's very, you know, but I mean, obviously basically it's very Tibetan coded, you know, that kind of thing. Eastern philosophy sort of thing. It's pretty cool. Um, and he gives your standard ass gobbledygook speech, uh, that basically amounts to while you kids were getting soft, I studied the blade.
00:35:12
Speaker
Uh, that's basically, yeah yeah and he's got a katana and he like shows off his fucking sick ass katana skills and everyone and all the six year olds. Ooh and, uh, um,
00:35:25
Speaker
and And before they finish, he says, well, let's all gather together and chant in praise of Blizzard. And so they they do their little chant to the the Yeti that they center to their existence around. I don't know why these people are gods to them. they're just i Other than fear that they'll get stomped and eaten by them. ah Sure.
00:35:46
Speaker
I can't imagine they provide much. Yeah. Uh, Kays sees his girlfriend for the first time in six months because she like lives way out in the sticks. Uh, and if you live out in the sticks in Tibet, you're out there.
00:36:02
Speaker
Uh, so he hasn't seen her in six months. Uh, they reenact, uh, the final, uh, third act of, uh, of paradise by the dashboard light. Um, and, uh, you know, it very much let me sleep on it, baby, you know, and, and, and that kind of thing. Um, and she ends up stomping off, uh, because he won't take marrying her seriously. He's betrothed to her and he won't, he won't like,
00:36:29
Speaker
He basically wrote set a date is what it comes down to. He's not taking it seriously. He's a high priest. It's like they're so they're they're seeing each other once every six months. like Yeah. Come on, buddy. Lock it lock it in. Lock in. How much time you got left? how and how And how much time is it really going to fucking take out of your life?
00:36:49
Speaker
You got a, you got a wife and you see her like once every six months or something like that. What is it? What in your life is going to change? Right. It's going be, it's to be, you're going alone most of the time. um So you she leaves and he's feeling guilty about it is his whole excuses. You know, I'm a high priest. I gotta, I gotta, a I gotta work with blizzard all the time.
00:37:09
Speaker
ah And in that moment, as if a metaphor for what's happening in their hearts, a giant earthquake shakes the mountain. um And they're like, that's weird. There's never been an earthquake on a mountain before.
00:37:23
Speaker
No, never, never before. ah We cut to ah Vertigo, the cobra snake goddess thingy ah with her priestess, ah Melissa Wisteria.
00:37:37
Speaker
And the name is spelled W-M-A-L-Y-S-S-A. That is Melissa. It's just Melissa. We're just going to say Melissa. That's just Melissa.
00:37:48
Speaker
It's just Melissa. That's insane. ah So we, we meet them. I'm going to give you a reading ah from this that where it describes Melissa Wisteria.
00:38:00
Speaker
ah Great name. Terrible name. Awesome name. ah It's all the boxes simultaneously. Exactly. it's It's everything at once to everyone.
00:38:12
Speaker
um Melissa Wisteria stood motionless and respectful as befitted the chief sorceress of the Asperian tribe from the cobra shaped tiara that tamed her black hair. To the cobra-headed staff in her hand, Melissa was the picture of cool, beautiful malevolence. She was nearly naked except for golden strips across her magnificent breasts and a golden loincloth barely covering her loins.
00:38:38
Speaker
Despite her sultry beauty, Melissa was centuries old. I'm sorry for some time.
00:38:46
Speaker
She was centuries years old. She ah centuries old. She remained young by drinking the blood of young male virgins as she deflowered them.
00:38:57
Speaker
ah That's that's our that's our that's our girl. That's Melissa. I think Melissa right there. I think that's that's most Melissa's we know, really. I think most Melissa's I know kind of fit that. I would say that's that right into that that. That's a real archetype right there.
00:39:13
Speaker
Yeah. yeah and Everyone knows about that, Melissa. ah Yeah. So ah Melissa is going to get sent to this shrine ah where, cause this meteor it's basically there is a meteor, the big one that really blew up the world. And it's considered the sacred place by everybody. All the gods considered a sacred place and ah this giant earthquake that they're all feeling ah basically vertigo sensing that it has something to do with the meteor.
00:39:44
Speaker
ah So the meteorite, so she says, go down there, be my avatar, go down there and, and check it out and see what the hell's up. um Meanwhile, K's and blizzard, they got the same idea. And case is literally blizzard is literally just walking through the Pacific ocean. ah That's how big he's meant to be. And while K's kind of like holds on to the hit back of his head ah for dear life, um,
00:40:15
Speaker
So ah chapter four, ah Melissa arrives at this temple. They kind of call it a burial mound for the ah the meteor. And weird smoke is coming out of the meteorite. ah been and And no one's sure what's happening there. um St. John, an avatar of Diablo, shows up. And I want to point out, Kevin kevin helped me with this. ah The name is S-I-N-J-I-N, Sinjin.
00:40:42
Speaker
Sinjin, yeah. So- Yeah, explain that one. bell Okay, so it's it the name there's a name that is so written St. John, S-T period, J-O-H-N.
00:40:58
Speaker
St. John, right? And in in I remember in Mad Men, right, there was a guy whose first name was St. John, but it was pronounced Sinjin.
00:41:11
Speaker
So Sinjin Powell. And I was like, so when I saw Sinjin in the book, I was like, was there a chance that maybe he used the name Sinjin? He heard the name Sinjin and just wrote it phonetically as he heard heard it, not realizing that the name Sinjin is spelled St. John.
00:41:30
Speaker
Right. Right. and and and And which is made extra funny because it's just this is this is the avatar of Diablo. ah Right. oh you've cut St. John, who's the avatar of Diablo.
00:41:42
Speaker
um I'm just going to keep calling him St. John. um I'm saying John for. Yeah. Yeah. Why not? ah So he meets up with ah Melissa. They've kind of they're friendly ish. They're the Diablo and Vertigo have allied on different occasions. So they're they're cautiously friendly. um We get another moment describing.
00:42:04
Speaker
They're having a conversation. I had to write this down because Melissa shrugs her shoulders and but it's written. She shrugs her beautiful shoulders. She's Melissa is just going to breast boobly through this entire book. Breasting boobly. And we, I mean, I think we've unlocked a new fetish. I think we got, we got a shoulder fetish here, which I get it.
00:42:27
Speaker
Uh, uh, we get some background on chaos who is the other ape, uh, God. And he is, he stands out because he's the only one of the gods who used to be a human. He was like the crazy scientist who became obsessed with blizzard and tried to, ah create like try to, you know, Jekyll and Hyde himself into another blizzard. Uh, but it was so fucking wrong, I guess that he became chaos, uh, who is a, a
00:42:58
Speaker
like just debased monkey that like lives in its own filth. And if you played the game, he actually did have fart attacks. He might have had a puke attack if I'm remembering correctly. it was it was gross. That was that was the whole thing.
00:43:13
Speaker
um His fatalities, most notably the infamous fatality Golden Shower, drew a lot of condemnation from parents across the nation. Not happy about that one. No, sir. Yeah.
00:43:26
Speaker
So. Talon, our ah Velociraptor God shows up and I guess he contains multitudes. This is a very confusing description we get of Talon. I'm going to read it ah so you can see what I mean.
00:43:40
Speaker
The first to arrive was Talon, who was drawn upon a huge cart pulled by 50 human slaves, which The raptor god kept his human followers like cattle guarded by micro raptors, which was one of his more endearing qualities, thought Melissa. But his utter contempt for humans didn't hide the fact that Talon was basically a decent sort of god who eschewed sorcery and only wanted what was best for Earth.
00:44:05
Speaker
ah you donkey he He just kind of rolls in the ah second reference, but he rolls in like hedonism bot and he's like, whatever my my slaves want, they get. Yeah. It just, it was like, yeah, he keeps all these, it's, it's, he keeps all these slaves, but you know, he's, he's pretty, he so he's a decent guy. It's basically the, the, it's like the same explanation you got from the duck dynasty guy saying like, Oh, the slaves were, they loved being slaves. It was fine.
00:44:35
Speaker
So yeah, they loved it. So that's, that's talent. He has multitudes, I guess. Um, So the rest of the gods and the avatars start to show up. ah Chaos ah shows up just farting and puking everywhere. He's my favorite everywhere. Yeah.
00:44:53
Speaker
Yeah. And we meet Slash Fang, who is this saber to tiger God. Now, the interesting thing is this is this is what's going to ah kind of give you an idea on where we are on the timeline, because Slash Fang was a character who was originally meant to be in the first Primal Rage. They didn't use him. But he was going to be in the sequel, ah which was never finished, which was never released. Yeah.
00:45:18
Speaker
yeah And this book was meant to be a segue between Primal Rage Run and Primal Rage 2, which would have- and it's like it's like, you know, this the fans really needed the story.
00:45:30
Speaker
The story was finished. they did it They did. They did. They needed the full experience. ah you and And yeah, I guess humans were gonna play a bigger. I think it was actually meant to be a lot more like bloody roar ah where like you've got the humans who embody ah the powers and stuff instead of just the giant animals. And I think that's kind of lame. ah It's but whatever. Who knows? It might have been a huge deal.
00:45:56
Speaker
um So slash fangs there. um Melissa keeps wondering. If the dudes are virgins, they're like, it's like, it's like, it's like, it's like the, it's the two different guys, like two different avatars. She's like, I wonder if they're virgin that guy's definitely not a version. Probably not that guy. Mike, she's talking about K's like blizzards priest guy. She's like, he might be a version. That could be cool. I could do that. It's so weird. Uh, uh, it's just, it's very, very weird.
00:46:30
Speaker
ah So the meteorite finally shatters and inside is Necro sand, who is another character who was meant to be in the first primal rage, but was not used and was going to show up in primal rage too. He was like, ah I think he was meant to be like a Goro final boss kind of guy. And and and indeed, he he shows up and he says he declares that he is their master and they're not cool with that.
00:46:54
Speaker
ah You know what? Do you remember the end of Mortal Kombat where Shao Kang was that his name? Shao Kang, like appears in the sky above them and says, I will kill you all. And they go, don't think so.
00:47:06
Speaker
And they strike a pose and yeah' strike a pose. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's basically what happens, but we don't freeze frame after they strike the pose. We get into a a huge just scuffle. um They all start trying to kick his ass.
00:47:19
Speaker
They go at him one after the other, and he makes fun of them, explaining to us, basically, that They have rules that there's honor amongst the gods, that they're not meant to gang up on each other. Then it has to be a one-on-one fight, um which is okay. We didn't really need that, but okay, fine. yeah But eventually, and so- What he ends up doing is going up to their followers. This is pretty metal. So Necrozone is basically a winged Tyrannosaurus that's like exposed skeleton and and organs. And it's like, have you ever seen a zombie dragon in fantasy or that sort of thing? That's kind of what you're thinking about. It's kind of what you're looking at.
00:48:01
Speaker
And he goes up and eats some of ah the other gods followers. He chews up. They're dead. There's blood everywhere. But then they go through his gullet and they slide out of his ribs as zombies. So he consumes he their followers and oops them out of zombies.
00:48:20
Speaker
Exactly. So he he's building his own army of of zombie followers. ah And so they're like, oh, shit, that's not going to work out for us. And so they're like, fuck on her. And they all just dog pile him they They all try to get some hits in. And that's Necroissant's like, oh, shit, again I actually can't handle that. So he he he flies up above them and says, you know, um I'll tell you what, I'll see you guys later. I'm just going to be building up a giant zombie army. And I need zombies. Where would I go to get some human beings to eat? Oh, all of your houses and flies away. And everyone's like, oh, shit.
00:48:58
Speaker
He's going to our houses to eat our followers. Oh, no. Oh, no. So he flies away. And ah so we follow everyone. Everyone pieces. I was like, oh, fuck. And they all run back to their places. We follow Blizzard and K's. They as they cross the ocean again um and and they find their temple. It's been raised. Everything has been, you know, just completely burnt to the ground. And there are people.
00:49:26
Speaker
ah human beings, no people at all to speak of, including cases, girlfriend. So, sure yeah, presumably they are all ah zombies that they're just going to have to deal with ah later on down the line. And that's chapter four. And that's ah and because I miscounted, ah that's where we're going to stop, even though ah ah numbers wise, we could have gone for another chapter or something. But I don't care. ah So that's that's where we're going to stop. So, Kevin, what do you think so far of ah of ah Primal Rage, the avatars?
00:50:00
Speaker
You know, I think there's something... there's there's a and a i have a deep and abiding appreciation for competently executed stupidity. yeah Sure, yeah. And I think that's kind of where we're at ah with this, where it's like, okay, I mean, this guy can write... This guy is... He can write he can write some trash, you know? he is yeah is down there in the gutter, you know, the the the main female character, Melissa.
00:50:32
Speaker
ah Oh boy, is she going to breast boobly? I love it. You've got to love it. And um yeah, I, it's, it's kind of funny. It's kind of fun. Like I don't hate it. It's bad in a way where it's like,
00:50:49
Speaker
Well, I don't want to just put around the good, bad dichotomy. It's dumb. It's like it's really it's really base. ah the The baser instincts of writing ah be like this is cool. And I'm like, OK, I can I can live with that. You know, I can deal with a guy just doing that. That's fine.
00:51:13
Speaker
It doesn't take itself that seriously. it's It's impossible to get mad at it because it's not trying to be serious. So it's it's it'd be silly to do that.
00:51:27
Speaker
Yeah. It's yeah. um It's like getting angry at Bill and Ted. Yeah. Yeah. It's like, Oh fucking Napoleon never would have done that. Like, come on, grow up.
00:51:39
Speaker
ah Yeah. Grow up and act like a child with us. Drop and act like a child for once. Yeah. I agree. I think my impression of this book is kind of like, it's like a heavy metal version. And I mean, like,
00:51:55
Speaker
eighties, nineties, heavy metal. um It's a, it's a heavy metal version of when you're telling your kid a story and you're just kind of making it up as you go along and the kids laughing at certain. but So you just make it bigger and bigger and bigger. And before you know it, none of it makes sense. And it's completely stupid, but you're both laughing your asses off. ah That, uh,
00:52:22
Speaker
I think that's what we've got with a primal rage, to the avatars. And I am... 100% here for it. I have to be completely honest. I'm really enjoying it far. By the way, if you all can, go look up Necroson's sprite for the game.
00:52:38
Speaker
um He's basically a T-Rex that has no skin. He's just muscle, and then the bones are on top of the muscle.
00:52:49
Speaker
Yes. And bone wings. Mm-hmm. And they made they made ah toys ah for these ah characters. Pretty kick-ass looking ones, but actually, by the look of it. And for they did make a toy for this guy, and despite the fact that he's not in the game.
00:53:11
Speaker
Yeah, ah so a test arcade cabinet briefly appeared playable at the Golf Land Arcades in California, and a supposedly finished machine was shown at California Extreme 2001 show. interesting.
00:53:23
Speaker
ah yeah it's interesting like various over the years, like it's popped up at things like in various states, like test cabinets of have popped up.
00:53:37
Speaker
But it's interesting because the game was that let's be I'll be clear the arcade version of the game, the arcade cabinet version of the game was nearly complete, it seems like, and then was canceled before it got released. um Yeah, it it it didn't it didn't just like run out of money. or it was it was almost It was almost done. it was It was playable and it just stopped for some reason.
00:54:05
Speaker
Yeah. That part i wasn't sure about why.
00:54:09
Speaker
Yeah. I don't know. and Buy some of these toys, Kevin. These are cool as shit. Yeah. and The characters of Slashfang and Neckerson were released with the other God characters in the short-lived Primal Rage action figure series.
00:54:24
Speaker
That's it. That's hilarious. Okay, well, that is, ah I've got a new ah toy I have to buy for some reason. ah Now that... Specifically the Necrosan one or All of them. I want them all on my... I want i want the whole set on my bookshelf.
00:54:43
Speaker
ah ah Well, Kevin, now that that is done, I have i have something very important ah to ask you. Yes.
00:54:55
Speaker
What are you playing? in Ooh, I am playing Pragmata, which is an action-adventure game released by Capcom.
00:55:07
Speaker
ah Last week, you play as a engineer named Hugh, a systems engineer. Basically, you went up to the moon with your team. It's set in the future. ah You go up to the moon because the lunar base has kind of lost ah contact, never a good sign. So you go up with your team to to to make some repairs because basically the lunar base acts as a giant 3D printer. It uses something called Luna filament ah to basically make whatever, ah and that gets ah shipped back to Earth. Um, so you get there, there's a big moonquake, uh, and Hugh gets separated from his guys, the the rest of the people on his team, they all get killed, and then he's attacked by robot, and, um...
00:56:01
Speaker
These weapons are doing no damage until this little girl shows up and she hacks the robot and opens it up and so that you're allowed to do damage. Basically opens the panels, causes its front panels to open up so it's able to be shot. And you come to find out that this little girl is a what's called a pragmata, which is a super highly advanced android who ah seems human, isn't, but, you know,
00:56:30
Speaker
seems Seems like it. um And she's like, yeah, I just woke up. I don't know what's going on. ah Basically, you find out that she was created up on the moon base. She's been in stasis for a while.
00:56:45
Speaker
And after the moonquake and everything, she got... She got woken up and find the first person she finds is this guy, Hugh. And basically the game becomes um ah dad of war simulator.
00:57:01
Speaker
ah But except you're a scientist. And it's not war, it's ah trying to figure out, fight through this moon base filled with robots while your android daughter hacks them with her mind hacking abilities.
00:57:22
Speaker
Uh, gameplay wise, lot of fun. Uh, story wise already made me feel things a few times. Um, cause you know, it's, it's got the parenting stuff in it. Uh, the guy it's funny is like, the guy is not a parent. Like the guy is the guy, the main character is like, Oh no, I don't have any kids and I'm not married. Uh, and he's like 40, know,
00:57:44
Speaker
you know And he's just, but he's so good with the kid robot. You're like, oh, it's kind of sweet. um So, yeah, I think I'm about halfway to like a third of the way or halfway through it.
00:58:01
Speaker
um And it what's really cool is that it's another RE engine game. so So it's made in the same engine as the Resident Evil series.
00:58:13
Speaker
um Capcom is putting everything in this engine now. and One of the cool things is his the the little girl has long hair. um Basically, they hadn't been doing long hair in Resident Evil games for a while because it didn't look very good in Resident Evil 7.
00:58:31
Speaker
ah Mia's long hair was like all over the place. But it seems like they've nailed the long hair ah for r RE Engine. So ah it's kind of kind of like a neat little development.
00:58:44
Speaker
um But yeah, it's it's it's fun. I'm having a lot of fun with it so far. um I've also been playing the Powerwash Simulator 2's Adventure Time ah DLC came out.
00:59:02
Speaker
nice i I got it. I've not not watched a single episode of a Adventure Time in my entire life. i Everything i know about it is secondhand through just existing on the internet.
00:59:15
Speaker
Um... But I have yeah, so Adventure Time, ah the Adventure Time DLCs. Yeah, it's nice. You know, I always love the DLCs where they do they change up what the gun like the spray gun looks like and and all that fun stuff.
00:59:32
Speaker
um And it's also it's just more levels. And I appreciate being able to get more levels ah for for Power Wash Simulator. One of my games of the year last year.
00:59:43
Speaker
Yes. um What else? I started playing, um i i might have said this last time, but I started playing Fear and Hunger 2 again ah just because the eyepatch, you know, a super eyepatch wolf released his video on it and I was like, can't find fucking back into it.
01:00:05
Speaker
Yeah. Just when I thought I was out. Just when I thought I was out. i thought I thought I was going to wait until the 2.0 update, but, i you know, whatever. I'm back in.
01:00:18
Speaker
um but Yeah, that's what I've been playing. Phil, check my eat emails. There's one that says, Dear Excellent, Wish You Can.
01:00:34
Speaker
Signed, Strong Bad.
01:00:37
Speaker
I've
01:00:41
Speaker
been I am i am ah almost done literally within minutes I will be done with vampire survivors for the foreseeable future because vampire crawlers is out um and I'm going to be picking that up I don't even know how it's doing um let's see I mean, everybody i i know that has played it has been like just in it, in it to win it.
01:01:09
Speaker
And it's already got... The demo was insane. It came out today and it has an overwhelmingly positive, which you can't get to overwhelmingly positive. of i think at least 500 reviews and it has 813 Yeah.
01:01:24
Speaker
yeah um Yeah. So that makes a lot of sense. It's going to do fine. Yeah. i think I think what's crazy about it, what's weird about it for me was when I played the demo, I was in love with it. I absolutely adored it.
01:01:39
Speaker
But the fact that it was a dungeon crawler, which is such an old fashioned genre yeah style of game and and and a very you know millennial genre.
01:01:54
Speaker
era game. they And it's not one that's had like a big ah revival at any point recently. So I was like, this is going to be anyone who plays this is going to play it for a long time. I'm certain of that. jerk But I said, there is there still there's still a chance, though, that Maybe that'll put people off enough just to to not to not try it. and And I needn't have worried, I guess, because enough people played.
01:02:24
Speaker
ah they They were like, oh, they're making a new vampire game. I'm in. It doesn't matter what it is. I will i will pick it up, yep which which is good. ah So I'm looking forward to playing that. I played hours of the game.
01:02:40
Speaker
of the fucking demo. ah So I'm um I'm going to give up a month to this at least probably. ah i ra A month is a month is putting it lightly. It's going to be it. I am i am betting it'll be an off and on game just like Vampire Survivors is exactly ah for you know the next couple of years.
01:03:00
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Easy to pop in and out of. ah Vampire Survivors itself, I mean, it accomplished what almost no game has ever been ah able to accomplish it with me, which is I come back to it and play it more.
01:03:12
Speaker
Usually when I'm done with the game, kind of done with the game. ah But there I have i have a a small collection of games that I keep coming back to. Vampire Survivors is definitely one of them.
01:03:24
Speaker
So that's not even when I've played. ah us But I have been playing a lot of Infection Free Zone. um okay which is a zombie city builder i played the demo last year and i liked it but it was buggy as shit and it just it wasn't uh it was pissing me off on a couple of different levels uh and then it was like it was like 50 off on a sale recently it's still an early access um yeah but it was like it was less than 20 and i was like i'm i'll
01:03:56
Speaker
probably get at least 20 hours of gameplay out of it just because I love the city builder thing. And and i'm right I was right ah so far. ah it's it's It's fun. it doesn't do a ton of things all that differently from other city builders like it. you're doing You've got your scavenging parties that you send out looking for supplies and food and shit. Meanwhile, you're building you know turning broken down buildings into buildings you know, makeshift shelters and and and, you know, cook shops and like all kinds of places. And and there is, that you you know, you get some research in there and that kind of thing.
01:04:36
Speaker
um So it's it's a lot of fun. It it has a really special feature ah that I saw with um a game called, I think it was called 911 Operator Simulator or something like that.
01:04:48
Speaker
Hold on. Yeah, 911 operator. i got I played the shit out of that game for a little while. And it's it's exactly what it sounds like. You're a 911 operator and you have to send ah And ah ambulances and or cops and or firefighters all over the place. yeah um And what was really unique about it was that you could just put in a zip code or something like that. And it would like pick up information that was already available on GIS shit.
01:05:18
Speaker
And you would be playing it in your town. That's interesting. Yeah. and And that's what this has. It will do the same thing. ah So I set up shop. Most recently, i set up my HQ in a Methodist church up the street from where I live.
01:05:37
Speaker
Amazing. Yeah. It's it's it in it obviously doesn't get everything right, ah but it gets enough of it right that you're like, oh, that's fucking cool. It's got all the street names. I did one in Savannah where I was in downtown Savannah and I set up my HQ in the Keough house, which was an old bed and breakfast I used to work at. Sure. And it was it was right fucking there. And ah and that is.
01:05:59
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. and And I think the thing is the game. It's got a waste. Buildings. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. They're they're everywhere. and they and And there are a ton of books and shit like that for re- anyway, doesn't matter. ah It's- it's the each map has its own kind of personality to it, and and and that's fun. um And the game, it needs more in terms of like- though the the adventure aspect of it, the stories they give you ah are good, but kind of meh.
01:06:32
Speaker
And also there's a moment in every game playthrough that I've played where it just, everything ramps up to 11 really fast. yeah The difficulty creeps, like doesn't even creep, it races past. You're doing good. You're doing good. um You know, you're building your your shit. And then suddenly,
01:06:51
Speaker
There are, you know, giant swarms of zombies out patrolling. That is my. Yeah. And that's always been my trouble getting into like Project Zomboid is I feel like that game gets pretty. It's it gets hard really fast. yeah And I'm sure I know there's people who, you know, fucking love Project Zomboid. And I'm sure some of our listeners are Zomboid fans.
01:07:16
Speaker
players, but I just never... Zombordians. Zombordians. I've never just been able to get past that hump of like, okay, I'm tinkering around. Ah, Jesus, fuck it. I guess that runs over. Yeah. Yeah. yeah and and and And I've... and i've because Because that's exactly how it happens. One... yeah bad fuck up you lose suddenly you lose you can lose all of your scavenging parties in a matter of seconds suddenly uh no matter how kick-ass like i found i got to a place where i found a military base and got assault rifles and goddamn literal literal plate armor i think they got it from a museum uh amazing
01:07:56
Speaker
and they and and and and And like they were armed to the teeth. And then just this too big crowd of of zombies came by and just kicked our asses like immediately. And that and so I had to make a new group and I try to go back and collect all the the shit that they lost and avoid the zombies. this tu But it doesn't matter. I'm dead over and over again. And suddenly population's gone. It's like playing banished where you blink and suddenly you're like, oh, fuck, everything's ruined.
01:08:25
Speaker
Everybody's dead. So it's it's enjoyable. but You have to make a little of your own fun at times because the stories are kind of it's okay. If you take a lot of satisfaction from just the building aspect of of these kinds of games, then you then you got a lot of work with. It's great.
01:08:43
Speaker
um Yeah. and ah But i do think that the ah being able to basically anywhere in the world, they've got maps for everywhere from you know Albuquerque, New Mexico to Hong Kong.
01:08:56
Speaker
ah you know so you can I never checked North Korea. I wonder if North Korea is a place you could do. but That would be interesting. That would be interesting. So it's got a lot to like there.
01:09:07
Speaker
ah So um and I like it. It's it's a good one. I did get a free copy. It very rarely happens to me anymore, but ah Baked Games reached out to me and gave me a free copy of um Alaska Gold Fever, ah which is feelingwing it's doing pretty well. it's it's It's basically a gold prospector simulator in Alaska. um I don't see your bill.
01:09:36
Speaker
Go up in there, Alaska. Yeah, exactly. And so it's like it's like one part survival and one part ah creation. but ah You know, like ah ah you build the buildings all that. Crafting, that's what it is. um and and But it's also got a storyline, side quests and stuff. I haven't really played it yet, but it looks it looks pretty interesting and it's doing pretty well. So i'm I'm definitely going to have to fire that up this week because that looks like a lot of fun.
01:10:05
Speaker
um And that's, yeah, that's me. All right. Well, that brings us to the to the end of our show. Go ahead and follow us on the social medias or this this the sock meads.
01:10:21
Speaker
and As we like to call them. As we like to call them here. Pixelipod on everything. And, you know, I'm just going to throw this out there. New sign off. Jonesy libs.
01:10:35
Speaker
Jonesy