Transcript
Speaker: and reality or something like that and he's like yeah and i worship fiction and i'm a i create fiction and and e etc so he he's kind of like so it's kind of a bit i guess sure i don't know man i i i hesitate to even try when it comes to alan moore yeah uh you know what else is alan moore what's that Hey there, everybody. Welcome back to Pixel It. My name is Kevin with Museoids Phil. On today's show, we are diving into part two of Resident Evil Code Veronica ah by S.D. Perry. Now, I will say, as we go into part two, ah I'm starting to remember why Code Veronica's story is not, like, remembered well as...
Speaker: quote one of the good ones um now I always had a special place in my heart for the game code Veronica because I played with my little dreamcast and it was it blew my mind i was like Resident Evil yeah but you know reading through some of these plot points I'm like
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Uh... We did that. Yeah, yeah. Maybe in the remake they they write around some of these things. Yeah, there there are there are a lot of, like, ah kind of, like, collar-pulling moments where you're like, oh, jeez, okay.
Speaker: Yeah. Uh-huh. Yeah, it did not age. Did not age well. Uh... ah Wild, wild stuff. ah You know what else always ages well is a lovely website called patreon.com slash pixelitpod where you can go and give us money for, you can give us $0, which is called subscribing for free and just kind of follow along. ah Or you can give us $1. $1 just gets you access to the blog posts and every Monday, Monday,
Speaker: We got a fresh hot book review up on that site. It's mostly Phil right now, but I'm getting some reviews in there. Kevin's coming in come Coming in hot. Coming in hot.
Speaker: Coming in hot. ah My busy season at work is done. i can get in hot with some of these book reviews. Hell yeah. $5 gets you access to the bonus episode that we record before every episode. And $10 gets your name shouted out in every episode.
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Speaker: Yeah, so let's just, you know, put the body in the marsh. That's a big fucking dog, man. I spent all fucking night doing it, man. I'm embarrassed.
Speaker: Not where some guy from John Hancock goes to get a blowjob every Thursday. That's right. That's right. That's right. That's right. Don't laugh. Don't laugh. Are you soft fits? No.
Speaker: I'm embarrassed. I'm embarrassed. Spent fucking five feet in mud. Don't laugh.
Speaker: Oh, man. Yeah, God. Chapter five. We're a point of view from Captain Steve over there. He arrives at the dock and it's not really a dock. It's it's kind of i mean, it's a dock, but barely there's a.
Speaker: There's a it's a small platform just over a lagoon. There's a ship's wheel mounted up. There's a ratty life jacket hanging up. There's no boats.
Speaker: No. ah And at this point, he's like, maybe I should just ditch Claire. Maybe I should just go back to to working solo. And then he talks himself out of it. ah He goes up to the ship's wheel that's mounted and he just starts spinning it and that triggers a hidden mechanism and a platform slides out over the water and a compact submarine rises up out of the water. This is peak Resident Evil bullshit right here. i i That was exactly what I was going to say. What other franchise would this happen to?
Speaker: And my favorite part of this is he almost immediately goes into like, oh, Claire's going to fucking love this. Like he immediately is like he's already like plotting on being like, sup, baby. Who's got a submarine? That could be Claire's special boy. Yeah. um Bet your ex doesn't have a goddamn submarine.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah. I'm Leonardo DiCaprio from the Titanic. ah ah he yeah He climbs down ah and he finds the controls are actually pretty simple. There's a single lever marked main and transport. He seals the hatch and he pulls the lever.
Speaker: The sub moves underwater and it surfaces inside of a glass walled tunnel, an aquarium ah kind of corridor. And Steve's run through it, runs through it.
Speaker: He's too afraid to walk. And he just imagines that are dead faces pressing up against the glass looking at him. ah He gets to the end and he finds four zombies in tattered umbrella uniforms. He shoots them down and he notices ah that he's he's kind of getting a little bit numb to the whole process of dispatching zombies.
Speaker: um He moves past the zombie room and he finds a seaplane hangar with a large cargo plane in it. And he is happy because he can kind of fly, sort of. Right.
Speaker: But to get on the boarding, ah to actually get into the plane, he needs three hexagonal keys, which could be anywhere on the island. And he starts looking around the area, but can't find anything. So he decides to go back to find Claire.
Speaker: I love he has that and he has like an inner monologue where he was like, how stupid could I be to expect all three of them be in the same place? It's like, oh, you sweet summer child. Welcome to Resident Evil. Welcome. or You're in a Resident Evil book now. Yeah. You must best start believing you're in a Resident Evil book.
Speaker: <unk> so I was like working up. i was trying to remember the phrase. The framing of that quote. Best start believing in Resident Evil books. You're in one.
Speaker: Best start believing in Resident Evil books. You're in one.
Speaker: Oh my God. ah That was to Orlando Bloom's character, right? or I believe so. No, no, it's Keira Knightley. He's talking to Keira Knightley. To Keira Knightley.
Speaker: heard somewhere that the first... Pirates of the Caribbean ah script screenplay was based on... i haven't looked this up. I haven't confirmed separately.
Speaker: Was based on an aborted attempt at a Return to Monkey Island movie. I have heard the same. And the thing is, um I don't think that there's any and like any hard evidence of it. But you look at the argument and it's kind of impossible to...
Speaker: uh, dispute. Yeah. The skeleton looking ghost pirates, which is very much. Yeah. It's, it's, it's pretty on the nose when you, when you have it all, when you have all the, the, the facts kind of in front of you. Um, right. It doesn't necessarily mean it's true, I guess, but shoot, I like that. Weird shit has happened. That doesn't sound crazy. Crazy.
Speaker: Right. Um, Anyway, we're back with Claire. Yes. ah And she is heading from the mansion back to the training facility. And ah she she cuts through some zombies. She's looking for anything useful.
Speaker: Doesn't really find anything. um She searches a locked lab upstairs and witnesses a man in an environmental suit die against the glass. An emergency shutter lockdown is triggered, nearly trapping her. She heads out into a cobblestone outdoor courtyard and Alfred opens fire on her with a laser sighted rifle from the balcony above. As she dives her cover, she fires back and Alfred runs away. um And I think this is the scene where Alfred's like, yeah, yeah it's true.
Speaker: ah And she chase she gives chase. He's he's getting weirder ah by the page and and it hasn't been that many pages in the grand hasn't been that many pages. No. um So she comes upon a fork with two doors, which is where she loses him. And there's also a pair of broken vending machines. She kicks the machines ah the vending machines open and gets some mixed nuts, a little bit of orange juice, and ah picks the gray door ah to go through. And she finds a safe room with couches and an antique type. yeah
Speaker: Sick. I think i think if if I were in a weird place, if if I was freaked out in a weird, unfamiliar place, and I walked into a calm, inviting room with you know like an easy chair, a couch, like bookshelves, and an antique typewriter, I might have a heart attack. I may like, I know what this means! I know what's happening! oh ah She finds a ah ah fanny pack.
Speaker: um Which I know for you Brits out there, haha. um Forget about that. yeah Fanny. ah ah Anyway, it has some needles in it, some waterproof matches, ah some nine millimeter ammo.
Speaker: Waterproof matches. Is that? ah They're kind of dipped in wax. I know, I'm just thinking of Cat-like Tread. Oh! but completely but my My fucking prepper ah ah brain came to help.
Speaker: ah It's like, oh yeah, yeah, yeah, they're that we've got some of those. They're they're pretty cool. Or is it Silent Matches? I'm trying to remember the lyric now. think it's Silent Matches. Silent Matches.
Speaker: And your sentiment... Your life preserver.
Speaker: look you see oh man. This is what people love. This is what the what the people want. This is what the people want is all of... Silent matches.
Speaker: It's silent matches, not waterproof matches. Okay, good. yeah we're just we're just going to We're just going to do the the entire Gilbert and Sullivan songbook.
Speaker: And your got you guys are along for the ride, period. That's just how this works. Ta-ra-ta-ra, ta-ra-ta-ra. Okay, so, you know, there was a... yeah Hess, did you ever see Hess's ah ah ah graduate thesis film, Boys at Brunner Lake?
Speaker: was that That was the slasher, right? Yeah, with the guys in the masks and all that. I read the script. I don't i never i never saw it. There's a scene that we put in there, ah because I edited it, ah where the the boys, ah the titular boys, are giving chase...
Speaker: And ah they're running through like it's it's in it was filmed in West Virginia and they're running through like the like the like a valleys and caverns and all that stuff. And it's set to with cat like tread. but answer too Awesome.
Speaker: That's awesome. Oh my God. Do you have that anywhere I could watch that? I don't think I have a full version of it anywhere. i would have to ask Hess. I remember reading it and thinking it kicked ass. I remember. Yeah. I had i think I just started at SCAD at that point. and I just remember reading his script and being like, holy fuck, that's awesome.
Speaker: Yeah. yeah Yeah. Check with Hess. It was a fun little film. um i' I'll see if he has it somewhere.
Speaker: ah did do do did do ah Oh, yeah. And she finds the hemostatic medicine that Rodrigo needs. ah Claire ah reloads, repacks, and um then the corridor behind her slams shut. Alfred has triggered a shut shutter lockdown from somewhere, sealing her in. Alfred's voice comes over the intercom and tells her about that she's about to enter a special playground and that there's a friend he'd like her to meet. He laughs. Uh-huh.
Speaker: And then ah Claire's like, well, I guess there's only one option. And she goes through the door.
Speaker: Chapter six, we are now in Alfred's point of view. ah He's watching from a security, from the security control room ah as Claire has walked into his trap and he regrets that Alexia isn't there to watch with him.
Speaker: He has, he describes the creatures he's deployed, the OR1 units, which are also known as Bandersnatches. A term borrowed from Lewis Carroll. um And ah they're massive. They've got human skeletal feature, ah skeletal structure that you can see through the skin. They got skull-like faces and one big old rubbery arm.
Speaker: Yeah. ah Put the snatch in bander. Yeah. it's it's It's way better than what it could have been. like So, yeah, good, good.
Speaker: They really put that snatch in vagina. Your left arm. Hey. Pew, pew. beeppep pee Pew, pew. going to set up a soundboard one of these days. I know. That would be fun. ah Anyway, ah third they're Alfred's favorite little toy. He releases a Bandersnatch, and ah Claire, she just fucking kills it.
Speaker: Yeah. And Alfred's really upset. Oh, he blows up. He is piss. Because she just like, he's like waiting for her to be really afraid.
Speaker: And she never gets actually scared because Alfred, I guess, doesn't really realize that Claire doesn't feel fear anymore. more She just, I mean, she's just like, she's been through so much shit.
Speaker: but This is just another, another thing. Yeah. yeah She's just done. She's done. She shoots it in the fucking face. Right. A bunch of times. Yeah. And it works.
Speaker: And it works. And it works. And she's like, oh, that's their weakness. Just like, it's like that storm line from from X-Men. You know what happens when you shoot it in the face? It's the same thing that happens to everything else.
Speaker: Oh, I shot it in the face and it worked. Cool. Good. ah God, I feel like that first X-Men movie did so much damage to X-Men as a brand. I mean, I loved it when it came out. But of course, we all did. I mean, and we all did something to it. ah Yeah, there is something to it.
Speaker: But it like even in the comics, they went away from the colored ah uniforms for a little bit to match the stupid fucking ah outfits that they had in the movie. Yeah. um So I think everybody's kind of realizing that that comics being flamboyant is not a bug, but a feature. Right. Yeah.
Speaker: It's just that we're starting to see. I mean, I saw that the next trailer for a man, the Masters the Universe. Yes. And it looks like they're basically doing what they did with Barbie, where it's like and I'm like, yes. Yes. Good, good, good. That's that's we don't need grimdark He-Man for Christ's sake. Like it just we don't.
Speaker: He-Man is not Conan the Barbarian. He is. um Although a funny story, he was based on that. Yes, he was based on that. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. But he's like Conan the Barbarian, but with ah with a lot more color and gay.
Speaker: Yes. Yeah. Yeah. They, I believe the story is that they made the action figures ah for Conan. It was, you know, it was the eighties and and i I, I feel like the Conan, the barbarian had just come out or was on its way out or something. And they made all of these characters to like do some sort of spin off thing. ah And it was early in the eighties. So when they saw Conan and were like, Oh Jesus Christ, we can't sell Conan to little kids will get eaten alive because it was a different time. And so they created an entirely new family friendly universe around it.
Speaker: ah Yeah. and And it just so happens that same number of letters and it rhymes Conan. He-Man. Yeah, it works out great. It works out great. Yeah, it works out great. It's just funny to know that I could have gotten into Conan somehow even sooner than I ultimately did. i Somehow even sooner. That's really weird to think about. Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. I feel like i'm my parents probably still have the He-Man action figures in the basement. Oh my God. Well, the the the ones that they are, the new ones, are just kind of souped up versions of the original.
Speaker: Like, they just have more joints. Like, it's it's yeah kind of shocking how similar they are. it It's really... Yeah, yeah. And anyone who who's nostalgic for 80s action figures...
Speaker: uh i don't know what the fuck you guys are on because they had like two points two points of arce articulation and after a year the rubber band that was on the inside of them would like harden and snap yeah um they were not they were there's a reason why you bought them for 295 at the at the five and dime store um they were not built to last that is for goddamn sure And me using the phrase five and dime just... That tells you all... That ah that gives them everything they need to know, Kevin.
Speaker: That gives them everything they need to know about my age. Everything they need to know. You've just confirmed a lot of suspicions. At the Woolworths. At the Woolworths. I remember when I headed to the Sears and Roebuck ah for the first time. And I mean, honestly, talking about shopping at Sears by itself is enough to to fucking age me. Yeah.
Speaker: I'm adding the Roebuck. Fucking. and Let alone. ro
Speaker: Oh, God. um that fucking sears c anyway um there's there's an entire go look up what what that see ceo did to sears oh yeah it it was a nightmare what he turned the the most his one of the most historic american brands and just basically flush it down the toilet uh for for money he was ah he was a jack welch guy right i'm pretty sure he's a jack welch guy yeah yeah
Speaker: Sounds about right. Sounds about right. Anyway, Claire, this is a point in the game where Steve does like a slow motion jump through glass window kills one of the Bandersnatches using his dual gold-plated lugers. He bought the DLC or pre-ordered. He did the other. He got the gold-plated guns.
Speaker: um Yeah, they kill the and the second banner stash together and Alfred is very upset ah and he sends he sends them down. They like the room that they're in is actually a freight elevator and he sends them down into the the the basement.
Speaker: ah Steve and Claire just descend on the freight elevator ah looking around for threats. And queer Claire is, ah you know, she she gives in a little bit. She's now like, okay, that was terrifying. Yeah. um She's like, he's he's some he's... Doesn't they say something along the lines of, like, she sees him as more than just a boy or something like that? Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Speaker: It's like SD is just like... Un poquito horniness. It just gives us a little of that S.D. Perry horniness. There's nothing wrong with it. You just put a dash. Just a dash. And by the way, speaking of S.D. Perry, I just want to take a moment to pause and say if you haven't signed the petition, go it's going to be and it's going to be in the the description down below. Sign the petition to get S.D. Perry a chance to write a Resident Evil game.
Speaker: not Not only does she deserve it, we deserve it. That's all there is to it. Everyone deserves this. um So they get down there. Steve finds a submachine gun and gives and he takes in, he gives Claire some ammo.
Speaker: And then they they basically have an information trade off. ah Steve talks about the keys. Claire tells him about Alfred ah and and all that jazz.
Speaker: ah And she asks what Steve knows about Alfred and Alexia. And Steve only knows a about Alfred and that Alfred once sent his own assistant to the infirmary. And once you go to the infirmary, you didn't come back. And he knows Alexia is a shut in.
Speaker: That's about it. ah Steve says that Rodrigo might know where the proof keys are and they decide that they're going to go back to the prison. ah They go through the basement and ah in the boiler room, ah Claire shoots a flammable container near a group of zombies, basically video gaming the shit out of it.
Speaker: They hear a hunter, though, ah nearby. And ah Claire kind of explains what the deal is with hunters. Hunters are those like they're like frogman lizards.
Speaker: ah They were in the first game as well. And they're also in. I mean, in Code Veronica, ah but they were in what other ones. They were in one of the books to the one that um was an underworld. I think that it wasn't one that was based on on a game. Yeah, it was one of one of the ah originals.
Speaker: I feel like that was the one. ah But yeah, yeah. um So they ride an elevator up to the second floor and ah they are ah on a wooden balcony. And as they're crossing it, it falls and they it gives way and they fall.
Speaker: ah When they land, ah Steve is looking around and he sees a lone zombie coming towards Claire and he freezes for a moment because that zombie is his daddy.
Speaker: Yes, that's right. Steve has to put down ah his own father. Put down the old man. Gotta do it. Yep. Put down the old man. i I'm looking forward to the day when my son does this for me. it is just this It's just a time-honored tradition.
Speaker: This is actually how you realize. This is how you find out that Stephen, what's his name again? um Burnside. Yeah, yeah. This is how you find out that he's Southern. ah Because it's just a classic Southern tradition of just, you know, growing older and destroying your father taking his place. Yeah.
Speaker: Also, Burnside was a ah Confederate general. That sounds right. Yeah. Wasn't he? With a name like Burnside, it's got to be Confederacy.
Speaker: Let's see. Oh, no. My mistake. He was a Union general. Ah, well. Ambrose Burnside. But that's a good that's good with a name like Burnside. You know it's Confederate. yeah Yeah, that's, hmm.
Speaker: Yeah. it it does It does feel suspiciously Confederate. ah But also, you know, it might just be, it honestly might just sound suspiciously 19th century. That might be what I'm doing.
Speaker: Yeah, he has a magnificent, ah oh, yeah, that's right. That's where the phrase sideburns comes from. Oh, okay. Okay. Yeah.
Speaker: Cool. Yeah. Look up a picture of Ambrose Birdside and you tell me. i i I tell you that ah you need to like this man's facial hair.
Speaker: Glorious. And he kept it, it seems like, his entire life. ah Because you've got pictures of him younger and then pictures of him much older. And it's it was the same. It's just different color hair.
Speaker: Yeah. Good for him. Isn't it crazy we have pictures from the 1860s? Just, you know, wild shit, man. It is pretty wild. Yeah.
Speaker: ah But anyway. Resonable. Resonable. The term sideburns is a 19th century corruption of the original Burnside's named after American Civil War General Ambrose Burnside.
Speaker: There it is. hilar Oh, I love that. but anyway Claire Steve cries yeah yeah he's having a bad day he's having a bad day he tells a story about his father his father worked for umbrella he was a truck driver and was trying to steal a formula ah probably paid by Trent or something to steal the formula ah the umbrella umbrella came ah shot his mother yeah Just came and shot his mother and then took his father while Steve was at school. ah And then they took Stephen's father to Rockford.
Speaker: ah And then ah Steve assumes his his father had had assumed his father had died in the airstrike. um claire tells steve to to stay put you know you i'll i'll be back for you buddy um we get chapter oh wait no one more note uh he starts to think about the lugers and he's like this might be a puzzle piece anyway chapter seven um we're in rodrigo's point of view Rodrigo is barely alive. Claire comes back and gives him the hemostatic injection and ah leaves him the the lighter for light and good luck. ah Rodrigo ah tries to give her something in return and he tells her about the infirmary hidden behind the guillotine door and he gives her the key from his pocket.
Speaker: ah He says the infirmary doctor knows things ah and he falls back to sleep. ah Claire follows Rodrigo's instructions and goes to the infirmary. And it's a pretty awful place. It's ah it's not a medical facility. It's got a woman at wooden examination table, bloodstained floors, medieval-looking instruments.
Speaker: ah One of the rooms in it has just been burned. And there's a dead man in a lab coat in a small office who appears to have died of fright. Sure.
Speaker: Sure. sure ah Claire finds a glass eye and it turns out in Resident Evil fashion to be a key. And it opens a hidden passage behind the office wall.
Speaker: And ah she goes down some stairs and then ah into a room. And then she finds the torture chamber. ah There's a bunch of badly disfigured zombies inside. They've been ah their skin has been ah Their b limbs have been cut off and she kills them.
Speaker: ah The torch chamber is elegant for lack of a better word. It has a chandelier. It has a carpet runner as a velvet chair. you got it You could do worse.
Speaker: ah Custom wells with a pillory and a hanging cage, chains with manacles and leather collars and hooks, elaborate devices with gears and metal spikes. ah On the end of the, on the table next to the vela chair is a leather bound journal belonging to Dr. Enoch Stoker. ah good and Good name. Good name. Good name.
Speaker: Um, Yeah, this is really fucked up. ah Claire reads a couple entries. The first describes Stoker confiding his history to Alfred, how he tortured animals as a child and then other children and how hearing the screaming matters to him.
Speaker: And Alfred ah listens to this and says and says him and Alexia are kindred spirits. And then um the the second entry mentions that Alfred told Stoker about Rockford's network of hidden rooms and keys.
Speaker: um that in that the the whole system is based on ah edward ashford his alfred's grandfather because edward ashford and was a co-founder of umbrella with uh fucking what's his name um yeah yeah the yeah why am i uh for blanking on his name um it was the mansion the first one yeah um I never remember. I played most of these games and I never remember the names. It just gets so insane and it all kind of washes over me.
Speaker: Well, it doesn't have have help that there's like a few people that, um, no, not a real umbrella company fucking Google. Um,
Speaker: Very helpful. Thanks, AI. Oswald Spencer. um Spencer Mansion. yeah the Spencer Mansion. Well, there's there's Ashford, and then there who's this guy, and then there's ah who is the main character of Resident Evil Requiem, Grace Ashcroft. ah And I think there's some other like characters with similar names um in in the Resident Evil series. So it gets kind of confusing.
Speaker: yeah ah She also reads in the journal that there is a ah private home behind the mansion that most people don't know exist ah that Alexia and Alfred le ah live in. And it's like after all this like exposition dump, the journal basically goes, anyway, back to the mutilating. It's true. They all but say anyway. Like it's it's they might as well said, but fuck all that. And just moving into the next thing.
Speaker: ah So she runs ah up and outside and has a minor panic attack and then she ah carries on. um
Speaker: ah we're over with Steve now and ah he's self soothing a little bit and ah then he decides to go ah go to the mansion he steps outside and finds himself in a high walled square containing a World War two Sherman tank ah which he's too exhausted to be more than put mildly puzzled by I know like it's just like okay yeah fine sure yeah great yep
Speaker: um ah Claire catches up to him and she tells him about the Ashford's private hidden house and they agree to search the mansion ah for any way to get there and then he tells her about the Lugers and she agrees that yeah we should check that out I guess as much as anything ah um and inside the mansion they hear a door close upstairs and they think it's Alfred ah Steve wants to go after him but Claire's like meh sweet
Speaker: ah They go upstairs and they burst through the door um and they find it empty, but then they and they find a dead end wall with two Luger shaped indentations. but What?
Speaker: What are the odds? That's crazy. ah That's nuts. um fucking Resident Evil, swear to God fuck it sit's it's it's I love it though I love it too, that's just it, like I can't even mad can't stay mad at you it's the silliest shit ever and it's completely on on message for this franchise like yeah per yeah ah chapter 8 they're in the mansion they slap the Lugars into the wall and the and the door opens
Speaker: And I love it when S.T. Perry does this. There's another puzzle behind the door. And ah she just wrote, yeah, they'd simply push it open. I love it.
Speaker: It's so yeah she's just like, you know what? Fucking yeah, they they open it. You know how this works. I'm not going to describe a puzzle to you in a novel. It's just like, yeah yes, thank you. Good. That's great.
Speaker: ah So now they are outside again and they see the private Ashford home and it's pretty creepy looking. They go inside and it's lit by candles, old carpets, faded oil paintings, ah dolls, dolls everywhere.
Speaker: Classic. you gotta You gotta get the dolls in there. ah Yeah, and ah there's China dolls, plastic dolls, rag dolls, cloth babies impaled on sticks, and a life-size doll hanging ah hanging from the eaves in a party dress.
Speaker: And then from upstairs, they can hear a woman's voice, ah followed by Alfred's whining, and Claire and Steve decide to head upstairs. ah And...
Speaker: hey Okay, so here we go. Here's here's a thing that the thing that doesn't really age well that we were talking about earlier. They follow voices to a room where they see Alexia pacing in a silk gown, and she's berating Alfred for his failure to kill Claire.
Speaker: And ah Alfred is, can well, they they haven't seen anything. They just hear things. Alfred is contrite. and he's desperate for approval, wants to protect her.
Speaker: He insists he won't fail again, and then Claire and Steve burst in, and Alexia looks right at them with aristocratic composure, and she knows exactly who they are, and basically is like calls them peasants.
Speaker: um And then Claire notices something wrong. She asks where Alfred is, and Alexia turns to find the room, and out Alfred is gone, and but then she sees a mirror and realizes...
Speaker: She's Alfred. yeah What? Surely this could have come up sooner.
Speaker: Surely this one have this would have this would have a come to her attention at some point or another ah yeah sooner than this. than this yeah yeah yeah Alexia screams ah and dropping the rifle and runs away and she runs through ah connecting door to Alfred's room ah where she finds ah a long blonde wig and the gown on the floor. as She collapses ah sobbing and And then Alfred slash Alexia just like runs away.
Speaker: ah they had They realize they have to destroy everything. And then Claire and Steve are realizing, oh there's only one of them. Yeah. Yeah. there And I texted Phil.
Speaker: I texted Phil yesterday. was like, but by the way, ah i forgot about the Norman Bates stuff. Yeah. And I had not gotten to this point. and I'm like, wait, what are you talking about? and then ah but But here's the thing, though. I hadn't gotten to this point, but I also immediately knew what he was talking about because it is not exactly subtle ah in the moments leading up to it. Like there are more than right in all the chapters involving ah Alfred and Alexia. There is at least one moment per chapter where you're like,
Speaker: These are the same people, right? That would make me feel a whole lot better, especially when it comes to all the the the incest-y stuff. i would I would feel a lot better these were same people.
Speaker: Yeah. I mean, there's like this kind of... I don't know. I feel like the the the way it it is in the book and ostensibly in the game, it doesn't necessarily age well in the way in the treatment of, you know, not only potentially DID, dissociative identity disorder, um or ah you know, uh, trans, uh, trans people or what have, like a lot of it is, it's like little messy, like clearly they're crazy, um, kind of stuff. Yeah. yeah Anyway, it's, uh, it was a different time. We didn't understand.
Speaker: It's just, yeah. yeah Yeah. Yeesh. Yeesh is right. Steve will say some, some terrible things later about this. um anyway they're looking around uh they end up going up into and the attic and they find a note from alexia to alfred dearest alfred you are the brave brilliant soldier ever fighting to reinstate the ashford name to its former glory my thoughts are always with you beloved alexia ah sure yeah at and then Claire finds another attic above the attic uh and she comes back down with the three proof keys and a dragonfly shaped key and that's when the island wide alarms go off uh because the self-destruct system has been activated
Speaker: or we um so now they just have to run they're running they're running for the seaplane um they get to uh they get to it with just under three minutes left uh they they go into the plane steve gets to the cockpit starts powering it up uh and claire checks the cargo hold it's empty and uh the countdown reaches a minute and then they uh By 44 seconds, the engine pitch surges. The plane begins to move. They exit through the hangar sea gate, um and Steve takes them up and away.
Speaker: And as they fly fly away, Claire watches Rockford Island blow up below them. And ah she says she hopes Alfred has found peace or whatever it is he deserves.
Speaker: ah Steve asks where to, and they lock eyes. And then there's a thump on the roof. um The rear cargo hatch has been torn open. Claire grabs Alfred's dropped rifle from behind the co-pilot chair ah and goes to check it out.
Speaker: and the and total In the hole, the entire rear is gone, and there's a creature. Humanoid, eight feet tall, hairless, metallic dark gray skin. Left fist is a so mike a metal spiked mace, and the right hand is a hybrid of flesh and curved blades ah with white cataract eyes.
Speaker: And then Claire tries to shoot it with the rifle, but the rifle's empty.
Speaker: Uh, we're onto chapter nine now. Uh, Claire fights with this thing, which is kind of described as a tyrant. Um, yeah. Yeah. Um, I mean, they literally call it a tyrant at some point, don't they? Or. Yeah. Um, she calls a tyrant, but she says it's taller than a tyrant. Um, but i was like, I don't know. Tyrants are like eight feet tall.
Speaker: I feel like it's right at tyrant height. Uh, yeah. Anyway, she shoots it a lot. Guns don't seem to be working. um And if she goes into the cockpit, it'll just open the hatch and kill them both. And she wants Steve to stay at the controls.
Speaker: um So ah she basically, there's a lot of fighting back and forth. um And then ah she spots a hydraulic cargo track, a heavy load rail system used to push crates to the rear of the plane for unloading.
Speaker: ah The controls are set into the outer wall near the cockpit door. And if the machine is set for maximum weight, nearly three tons, but loaded with only a few pounds of empty containers, it will launch the platform at tremendous speed.
Speaker: So basically she decides to use this rail system first that's used to move cargo to basically hit the monster with it. And ah she she hits it and ah the ah hits it a few times. claire The creature manages one of its speed bursts and gets in front of it, trying to push back against the momentum. Claire opens fire, three shots to the head, and the ah the device wins and it sends the creature and the two crates on it out into the sky.
Speaker: and then she goes back into the cockpit and she's like, yeah, I handled it. By the way, the rear cargo hatch is gone. yeah yeah By the way, an entire portion of the plane's gone. Just gone. By the way, this fucking tyrant back there, don't worry about it. Don't care it don't fret, though.
Speaker: Mama took care of it. Mama took care of it. sweet Mama's special boy is safe. um So ah they end up taking a nap.
Speaker: ah They wake up. Alfred has hijacked the plane. ah don No, they haven't taken a nap yet. Claire falls asleep. Steve wakes her up a few minutes later, though, because Alfred has hijacked the plane.
Speaker: The plane is now on autopilot, and he basically is... he is wearing a Blexia's makeup, but it's all smeared. And he's speaking in Alexia's voice saying, he can't let you, escape he can't let you escape now. Uh, and you have alerted my other play things, uh, but enjoy the ride.
Speaker: So there's nothing they can do. They decide to eat some vending machine nuts and, uh, and chat. just You know, they, they get to know each other little We're probably going to die. Well, what's your favorite TV show?
Speaker: You want some nuts? yeah The first honest question he asks her. Yep. ah Claire tells Steve about Raccoon city everything that happened in Resident Evil 2, and about Trent.
Speaker: ah She says she's in college, two years older than loves riding motorcycles, loves cheeseburgers, dance music, and grunge, and finds politics mostly boring. Oh, sweet summer child of the late 90s. It's about to get real not boring, kid. Yes.
Speaker: ah Steve. ah So they get to know each other and they fall asleep leaning against the cockpit wall. At some point they drift closer. Steve thinks about non consensually kissing her and then decides not to because he's a gentleman.
Speaker: Slow clap. Slow clap, buddy. Good job. Slow clap. ah He ah the plane's descending and Steve looks at the the the map and they are over the Antarctic. um So ah they they're coming in for a landing. They're coming in through a snowstorm. and ah the plane lands a little too fast and too low. and The landing gear drops, can't save them though, and the plane touches down and the gear crumbles and the plane just crashes into the snow.
Speaker: Everybody's bouncing away, ah bouncing all around. And ah yeah, they just land in a ah in front of, they basically skid into a building. um And that's where ah chapter nine,
Speaker: ends and that's where we'll leave it for tonight so phil what do you think well aside from the usual stuff that isn't going to age well uh uh you know this is clearly this is this is actually probably uh perry's like most fast-paced uh resident evil like she Yeah.
Speaker: jumped straight into it as we mentioned in the last episode and and now that we're twoth thirdds of the way through has not led up there have not been a ton of like establishing moments and that kind of thing it's actually pretty good writing like finding out about steve's background through action and and and right you know like Pretty good shit, honestly. ah I haven't decided if it's like her best written one, but it's it's it's damn well in the contender contender list for that. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. What about you? What are thinking so far? yeah i I would agree. Yeah. I think the the the stuff that doesn't age really doesn't age particularly well. And I think there's going to be... If they remake the game Code Veronica, they're going to have to do some things to kind of pick apart ah this character.
Speaker: um Because here's the thing. is There is... um it's not that Alexia never existed. Um, and we'll find that out in, in, in the rest of the book. We'll, we'll discover that there is an Alexia.
Speaker: Um, but it's not, uh, so I don't know. Well, the I know they're not afraid of changing and tweaking things. Like, I mean, what was it? Uh, what's his name from, uh, Resident Evil remake from four to, uh,
Speaker: Was it Luis? Is that the guy's name? yeah, the little Napoleon dude. No, not the Napoleon dude. The Spanish federal agent. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. um They, like, re-totally did his... Redid his entire character and, you know, gave him a ah very very nice ending to his character arc.
Speaker: um So, yeah. i I think there's... I think they're not afraid of changing things when it has... kind of reached a point of like, yeah, that's ah that's not great.
Speaker: Yeah. So we'll see. Which they're going to have to do because they've reached a point um with the remakes. I was just thinking about this where it's like, okay, we've got Resident Evil 5, Resident Evil 6, and ah those are gonna need a lot of makeup like we're gonna have to so go work for us to actually want to buy those remakes they're gonna require a shit ton of uh of change uh compared to what they've done so far and and this one's no real exception yeah
Speaker: Yeah. um So, yeah, that's that's that's it so far. um Phil, though, I do have one more question for you.
Speaker: Oh, please.
Speaker: What are you playing? Oh, okay. So I'm playing video games. um Oh, man. Oh, Papa. I am playing video games. I'm playing video games. I'm sad that I'm playing video games. Oh, that's good.
Speaker: That's good. ride grow all right we've got the whole family the whole family's here uh i i i did play i played i played a decent amount of games it's been nice it's been a video gorms video games strong bird ah i i um i so I played and finished Lost Wiki Kozlovka, which is another one of these like haunted ah you know operation system ah investigation games. ah and And this one is all based in this strange wiki, and it's this...
Speaker: bizarre Eastern European ah mystery thing with ah pagans and and murder and bloodlines that go far back. And it's it it was fine. It was it was perfectly fine. ah I'm just looking at it it's like, oh, it's like it has a Mac OS. Yeah, yeah. it's and And it's got overwhelmingly positive reviews on Steam and i i I get it. I mean, that was one of the reasons I i was attracted to it because this has become one of my favorite fucking new genres uh out there um a it was fine it was fine uh uh it was it was five bucks uh and i don't think i even paid that much for it i think i got it for like four um it was fine it didn't blow me away i think because the investigation
Speaker: ah After a while, you were looking in the exact same places. um And that's ah for for for more information. And that's normal with a lot of these games. But generally in the games, as you progress a day or something like that.
Speaker: um you're getting a whole access to a whole new set of shit or something like that. It's a very steady... ridele Right all the way up to the end, you're you're getting new information and new places to find it.
Speaker: This one, I think it's like... 18 levels or something like that, something around that. And around level four or five, you've got everything you need. You've unlocked everything.
Speaker: um So going forward, you're going to be looking through the same information And that's in ah it's very clever in the sense of like making some use out of out of very little.
Speaker: um And that's and that's that's admirable, I think. ah But it just didn't hurt me. I finished it yeah and and they make it real easy. for They have three endings and they make it real easy for you to go in and get all three endings ah once you've beaten it. So i I wrapped that up in it. It was fine. It was fine.
Speaker: um Okay. I also, let's see, I played the demo for Warhammer Survivors. Okay. As is required by law for me. Yep.
Speaker: um and and And it was, it have you played it yet? I have, yeah. Yeah, it is just goddamn Vampire Survivors. It is Vampire Survivors. i You know what's weird, though? it was like I was just playing it, and i was like There's a little bit of the sauce missing. Yeah. um Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. There's like, there's like, it's like you buy. It's like, okay, mama gave you grandma's recipe for the ragu. And now it's your turn to make it.
Speaker: And it's like, you you followed all the steps. Yeah. Something's But there's something missing. Yeah. Yeah. It's interesting because it is it is so identical.
Speaker: The ultramarine that you can play in the demo is it's basically the whip ability. It even levels up in the same ways. And I didn't mind that. That's fine. That was what I wanted, frankly. um Right.
Speaker: I think, and this is my theory, and maybe this is me being an optimist, I think it's that with these games, with the Survivor's games, um investment is what is required to really get sucked into this.
Speaker: all Right. Because you're unlocking characters, you're unlocking levels, you're unlocking weapons. It's... constant with these games. And if you're playing a demo, which gives you one character to play in the 40k version, one character to play in the Age of Sigmar version, which is a fun idea. I like that.
Speaker: um yeah I thought that was a nice touch. But
Speaker: I don't know. it got to a point, I found myself at a point where it was pretty difficult to start with, which is how it is when you first start playing Vampire Survivors. yeah You know, you've got to really build things up and and then and then the scissors start to glide through the wrapping paper. And i i kind of found myself thinking like, why would I do that right now, though?
Speaker: Like, this is, this is, all I'm going to get to do is play this version of it. And that's, and that's, that's missing a huge piece of why you play these games.
Speaker: Yeah. And that's the thing. i I remember I played the demo and I like died after like three minutes and yeah and then when it pop pops you it's like, You play the demo. And they're like, what?
Speaker: but I mean, I feel like the vampire survivors demo, don't get me wrong, I think there was a demo for vampire survivors. I don't remember. but i don't remember, but it I feel like it would it feel like it should give you a little bit more.
Speaker: um It's bare bones as shit. Real bare bones. Also, the UI isn't as readable. like Like, something about the UI, I was like, what? I feel like I'm...
Speaker: Like it just the fucking menus, something about the menus feels off. Yeah. um i mean it Yeah. it You're right. Something in the sauce is missing. ah Something in the sauce is missing.
Speaker: ah You didn't you didn't mince enough garlic. You didn't, eat you know, you didn't you didn't quite have the love. that Nona gave it. You don't have the love that Nona gave it. You didn't slice the onions so thin that they just melted. which is stuff it's just my favorite That's my favorite, like, what the fuck are you talking about? Onions don't melt.
Speaker: ah It's just my favorite line from Goodfellas. Oh, the garlic. He's cutting the garlic the garlic. He's like, you cut the garlic so thin with the razor blade that it melts. and like It doesn't melt. No, you mean that you mean it burned, is what you mean. It burned. What do you mean garlic melt?
Speaker: You go add that shit right at the end because it'll burn after like 60 seconds. yeah The thin sliced garlic? yeah you can't do You can't just put it in there and it melts. It doesn't melt.
Speaker: i I remember hearing that before I cooked, before I was before i got into cooking. I was like, oh, that's so cool. Yeah, it's like, oh, that sounds wonderful. And and now i I cook quite a bit, and it's like, what are you fucking nuts? you out of your mind? No.
Speaker: ah Liquify the garlic. yeah No. I'm just going to post recipes yeah on online that say liquify the garlic. Yeah. had it Fold in the cheese. Fold in the cheese. Fold in the cheese. don't know. You fold it. I don't know. I cannot tell you how to do everything.
Speaker: um But i think I think the game this week that really ah like hooked me ah and it surprised the shit out of me um is ah Minos. Minos.
Speaker: Okay. It's M-I-N-O-S. It's popped up a couple times on my Steam friends. Same. Same. Might have been you. Maybe. well you just yeah Oh, I see. well e keep It kept popping up kind of in my algorithm and in my suggestions and that kind of thing.
Speaker: And I finally was like, yeah, fine. I'll fucking play it. I'll give it a shot. And the worst thing I could do is have to... refund it you know but it was like it's a it's devolver digital they're they're they're pretty reliable this looks neat it is it is pretty great uh so what this is is it's like a it's like a base builder tower defense thing you are the minotaur at the center of the maze of the labyrinth and you have waves of Greek soldiers, different styles of Greek soldiers with different skills and abilities that are going coming to find you, uh, in the maze. And it is up to you to set traps for them. And if all else fails, fucking go in there and fight them yourselves. Uh, uh, and it amazing.
Speaker: whoa It is so good. it is just satisfying. like when you when you get It's like a lot of these games where like when you get the hang of it, you get into an rhythm a rhythm of it and everything.
Speaker: ah The roguelike elements of it, the puzzle elements of it, the the leveling up, everything like that. And it just feels good to play. and especially yeah especially you know You talk about a you know evening double screen evening when you're throwing when you throw something on tv with your wife and and you know you're just dicking around uh on the steam deck or something this is this is this is my laptop game this is what i've i've been playing in the evenings yeah that's this looks perfect It's lovely. It's it's really fun. ah The writing is kind of fine, like but it's interesting because like the labyrinth itself is this living thing, um and you ah gain power and new traps and access to stuff as you kill these soldiers coming in to kill you. When you kill them with traps, their blood like is part of a sacrifice to the labyrinth itself.
Speaker: ah and and and and And it's really interesting. It's got it's got a storyline. The storylines, i don't really care. I'm not here for the story. ah it Sure.
Speaker: But it's good. It's it's well done. It's got a Hades kind of vibe to it, the way that it's ah presented. Yeah, it looks, yeah. um But it's it it feels good to play. The ah the graphics are fine. looks good Every now and then you'll but have a ah set piece ah that is just extraordinary. You're like, holy shit. like Like, it's just a rogue trader style kind of like gothic huge kind of thing.
Speaker: um Right. It's just, it's very good at what it does. And I'm really enjoying the shit out of it. Yeah, it's awesome. Yeah, yeah. This one. And I i i put off ah some other stuff ah that I was... looking forward to more to play this i have no regrets uh this is like very bolt gun 2 the bolt yeah i i haven't played the bolt gun 2 demo exactly i mean that's just it i i should be playing that but minus is fucking sucked me in um i have resident evil requiem uh uh i i i'm playing my nose man i can't can't do it playing minus can't do it right now playing minus playing minus uh so yeah that's me so uh kevin what are you playing
Speaker: Oh, okay. So, uh, first of all, I finished Saros. I beat the, I beat Saros and, uh, and, uh, got the true ending. Um, it's just like I predicted, ah the true ending is just as much of a bummer as the bad ending. but in a different way. Okay. It's like, yeah it's it's a bummer in that you have to come to terms with the fact that you ah fucked up and you also have to let go of your past and all that stuff. You know, real existential stuff. Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: So so i beat Saros. I played the Bulk Gun 2 demo, um which is... I got to play it again and dedicate a little bit more time. I didn't play it play it for very long.
Speaker: um the The level that is the demo is... I don't know why I just had Daikatana vibes, because it's set in a swamp. this The demo is like set in a swamp and it's frogs. And it just reminds me of the first level of Daikatana, where there was like...
Speaker: frogs or or whatever. Okay. Okay. But yeah. So, ah you know, i fired it up, picked the sister of battle ah first voiced by Alana Pierce.
Speaker: um and just went to town and she ah she has like a... it's like some sort of force sword um in one hand and then she used a bolter pistol is is one of the weapons that you pick up for her.
Speaker: um So it only has like eight shots or or whatever as opposed to the the full bolter that the space marine has. But ah she's she's fun. She's faster than the Space Marine. Okay. Moves faster and ah has ah has a lot of fun. has this, like, sliding attack where basically you just hit F and she just, like, runs and slides with her sword out in front of her. it just, like, tears through everything, um doing a ton of melee damage. Okay.
Speaker: So, yeah, it's ah it's a good time. um ah Yeah, we already talked about Warhammer Survivors. ah Played that. ah All right. So the beef of what I've been playing this week, the beef on the plate is Zero Parades for Dead Spies.
Speaker: Oh, yeah, yeah. I heard a lot about this one. Yeah, it's the new Zaum game. ah Obviously, there's a whole lot behind saying that phrase at all. um So, has just Zaum was founded as ah as an artist collective it turned into a company to make a game. That game ended up being Disco Elysium.
Speaker: ah There are some shenanigans with the CEO ah and the founders of the original founders. they They get pushed out. um And that's the most of what people know.
Speaker: Ultimately, after the original founders are pushed out, the employees that were left at the at the studio unionized. um So unlike a lot of video game ah ah shops, a lot of dev teams, Zaum is actually a union ah developer now. God damn right. Fucking beautiful. Which is, you know, some silver linings. Now, there's a bunch of people on ah ah Sputnik 34 put out a video that was a review of Zero Parades, and he's he loved the game. But the first, like, 10 minutes is talking about the situation with Zaum and the all that stuff.
Speaker: Yet people are constantly commenting on his video like, yeah, you're playing, you're you you should be playing it. you're The people who made the game are scabs and all that. like I ah don't think you understand.
Speaker: You keep using that phrase, scabs. It's kind of the opposite of a scab. Right. So I i don't know. Leftists, I mean, I ah consider myself a leftist, but goddamn fucking annoying bullshit. Nobody hates leftists more than other leftists. that that's So anyway, if you I'll probably put Sputnik's video down in the comments below, and and the comments below, the the description below. Go ahead and give it some love.
Speaker: But my opinion on Zero Praise for Dead Spies is It's very much like Disco Elysium in style and presentation. The system is completely different, as in your stats are... It's ah it's a different type of stat archetype.
Speaker: um There's three. ah There's one which is like physical, but it's not physical as in like strength. Whereas in Disco Elysium, it was like the actual strength of Harry, your character.
Speaker: This is more like
Speaker: things like there's a there's a stat within the physical attribute called shadow play, which is more of like the muscle memory of doing spy shit like rather. So that that lot that is in the physical area and then there's the emotional area and then there's the mental area. So anything to do with like muscle memory, coordination, what have you is in the physical at is under the physical attribute.
Speaker: um so you have the three three attributes um but unlike the disco elysium where that kind of determines the two of those end up determining your hit points your physical and mental hit hit points um either of which if they if they go to zero you died in disco elysium um either by like a heart attack or cringing yourself to death.
Speaker: um In Zero Parades, i what it does is each of your, there's there's damage points that you accumulate to each one.
Speaker: And when the damage meter fills up, you actually lose a stat point in one of the subcategories in that an attribute.
Speaker: So like I said, shadow play was in the physical one. ah you If you get 20 points of fatigue on your physical, 20 fatigue points,
Speaker: It's like, okay, well, now you have to lose lose ah an attribute point. um So it's... it's it's it it's a I would say it almost feels like a little bit more of a well-thought-out system um than what you had in Disco Elysium.
Speaker: But it's less funny than Disco Elysium, okay which was, you know, intentionally... has a lot of funny stuff going on for it because you're playing a drunk, hungover cop who can't remember his name.
Speaker: He got so blasted he can't remember his name and he's lost his gun and his badge and his car. um That's who you are in Disco Elysium. Yeah. In Zero Parades for Dead Spies, you're playing a spy Who is back on her first mission in 10 years after being pulled out of the fields.
Speaker: um So it's like, it's your first mission after a decade of being, i think it's, they they call it, it's like the fridge or something like that. or or She's working the desk basically. or Yeah, she's been out of the field for 10 years. Now she's being put back into the field and shit's gone fucking wrong immediately.
Speaker: So, ah basically you're trying to figure out why why, shit is going wrong. Like you haven't even got, you don't even get your briefing. Um,
Speaker: you don't know what the mission is when shit goes sideways. And now you're just trying to figure out why did shit go sideways before I even got my briefing? What's going on here?
Speaker: Um, so yeah, I, I'm liking zero parades for dead spies. Don't call me a scab. Um, whatever, I guess I, I'm, I'm glad they're unionized. Um, yeah, or, or call them a scab. It doesn't, it makes zero sense at all.
Speaker: Oh, God. So, yeah. And anything else that playing? Oh, I just downloaded the beta for her Dark Heresy.
Speaker: Ooh, okay. um So that'll be, I'll be playing that soon. Nice. um And what else? ah That's it.
Speaker: That's it. That's all we got. That's all we got for you folks. That's it. Yeah. Anyway, go follow us on the social medias. ah Blue Sky, Instagram, ah TikTok, YouTube. Subscribe to our YouTube channel.
Speaker: um PixelitPod will get you there. And Jonesy lives. Jonesy lives.
