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Emotional Regulation
42 Plays1 year ago
I’ve attracted many low vibe experiences in my lifetime and previously I found ways to distract myself or suppress the feelings, or I’d simply walk away from them, at times I’d even run and not look back.
This time however I’ve chosen to stay and sit in the feelings, let it pass through rather than shove down into a pocket of my body to avoid feeling.
I found myself earlier in the week, last week, thinking about what I knew would be a low vibe experience in the up coming weekend, dreading the thought of it, as it dredged up all my thoughts around unworthiness, I justified in head why this was happening to me based on all my flaws.
In this episode I share with you the journey of the highs & lows and how I chose to balance out this low vibe emotional experience in way that worked in my favour rather than take me deeper into a sadness of my situation.
Lotus Flower Video via @brandencollinsworth
https://www.instagram.com/p/CpCPZpGvux1/
Daring to Suck Video singing “Alive in the light”
https://www.instagram.com/p/CpHhbQcBXvO/
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As the Owner/Operator of a unique retail store offering which is ever evolving, and a Dharma Coach I hope to facilitate and support others in realising their dreams of creating a life they truly love, doing work that aligns with their values & unique skills.
Book an immersive shopping experience at Creators Nest, a space showcasing handcrafted wares of professional creatives locally & beyond.
https://creatorsnest.com.au/pages/about-us
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https://creatorsnest.com.au/collections/workshops-events
Dharma Coaching service
https://creatorsnest.com.au/pages/dharma-coaching
https://www.instagram.com/creatorsnestyass/
https://www.instagram.com/bymarienicole/
Intro & Outro Music: Shaman Dance by slavamusic
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By accessing this Podcast, I acknowledge that the entire contents are the property of Marie-Nicole Roberts, or used by Marie-Nicole Roberts with permission, and are protected under AU and international copyright and trademark laws. Except as otherwise provided herein, users of this Podcast may save and use information contained in the Podcast only for personal or other non-commercial, educational purposes. No other use, including, without limitation, reproduction, retransmission or editing, of this Podcast may be made without the prior written permission of the Marie-Nicole Roberts, which may be requested by contacting
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Transcript
Introduction and Personal Journey
00:00:00
Speaker
Do you desire to turn your passion into income? Connect with other creative souls who also dance to the beat of their own drum?
00:00:08
Speaker
I'm Marie Nicole and I'm devoted to combining beauty, uniqueness and connection in everyday living experiences. As a creative professional and Dharma coach, I help people connect to the truth of who they are and facilitate them in embodying their uniqueness. It is my hope in this podcast that I inspire you to live your life on your terms and earn your income
00:00:31
Speaker
through being uniquely you. After all, it's the unique thread that we each contribute to the collective tapestry that creates the whole. I was describing to somebody recently what this part of my journey has been like.
00:00:54
Speaker
going through quite a significant transition from what was into what will be. And I'd like to paint a picture for you through a visualization. So close your eyes if you're able to. If you can't close your eyes, at least tap into your imagination. Now imagine you're on a train. You're in the regular carriage and you've been upgraded to first class.
00:01:16
Speaker
You walk through the door of the carriage and you find yourself in the void between the carriages, which swivels side to side. It's a little rocky underfoot, but you get glimpses of the first-class carriage you're about to enter and it looks magical. Instead of metal and vinyl seats, they've got timber and leather, extra wide with more legroom. The fixtures of the carriage are all crafted beautifully.
00:01:44
Speaker
You can see a food cart with delectable delights and crystal glassware rather than the vending machine and plastic cup dispenser that was in the carriage you just exited. The anticipation of experiencing the rest of your trip in such a beautiful space is so alluring. But the train is moving so fast that your hand keeps rocking away from the door handle each time you reach to grasp it.
00:02:12
Speaker
So you stop and you centre yourself. You find your balance, you sway from side to side to the motion of the train until you're able to reach out and grasp that handle on the door to the next carriage and open it to walk through. Now open your eyes slowly and come back to where you are right now. For me, that's in the void. I'm still finding my balance.
00:02:39
Speaker
But I can certainly see glimpses of that next phase and stage of my life's journey and it looks magical.
Experiencing Highs and Lows
00:02:45
Speaker
This last week I have experienced the highest of highs and the lowest of lows in this transition process. I won't go into all of the details of the lowest of lows out of respect for the people involved. But I will say it relates more to what's taking place in the unraveling of a life that was as married with two kids now entering into this new phase of life.
00:03:09
Speaker
single with a teenager still at home, closing my commercial space to accommodate the shifts taking place around me. Announcing the closure of my retail store has opened up many conversations around how sad it is to see me letting go of something I so dearly loved and poured my heart and soul into. The same could be said for letting go of my marriage.
00:03:31
Speaker
But the universe has an interesting way of extracting us from a stagnancy. The experience of the opposite extremes, the highest of highs, the lowest of lows are actually what made me feel even more grateful for the highs. Much like the frequency shifts in music creates the melody, it's the frequency shifts in life that creates the magic.
00:03:54
Speaker
I'm not saying I wish upon anyone to experience the lowest of lows but if you attract them and can find the beauty in that experience then you can also enjoy the highest of highs. I've attracted many low vibe experiences in my lifetime and previously I would have distracted myself or suppressed the feelings or I'd simply walk away from them. At times I even just ran and didn't look back.
00:04:21
Speaker
This time however, I've chosen to stay and sit in the feelings, let it pass through rather than shove it down into the pocket of my body to avoid feeling. I found myself earlier in the week, last week, thinking about what I knew would be a low vibe experience in that upcoming weekend.
00:04:42
Speaker
dreading the thought of it. As it dredged up all of my thoughts around unworthiness, I justified in my head why it was all happening to me based on all of my flaws. And that was so confronting. So confronting that I decided to crack open a bottle of bubbly. I'd not consumed over the festive season. I wanted to just wash down my feelings and not go there.
00:05:06
Speaker
but I did not enjoy drinking it at all. Here I was sipping on a beautiful bottle of sparkling wine and all I could taste was shame. Shame based around where I was in my life, how I ended up here and all of my failures. But the next night I chose to just drink soda water with lemon and just do things to distract myself from those feelings.
00:05:29
Speaker
But there was still half a bottle of this sparkling wine left and I did not want it to go to waste. So the night after that, I drank the rest. But again, I didn't enjoy it. I didn't enjoy the experience at all. And it was interesting to notice that I actually enjoyed the soda water and lemon more than I did the wine.
00:05:48
Speaker
It had nothing to do with about feeling guilty around drinking. I'm not a big drinker, and I do enjoy my wine. But it was the fact that I was in drinking not to feel. That's what made it unenjoyable for me. I wasn't drinking in the company of friends, enjoying stories and laughter. It was just about avoiding the real feelings I had going on inside.
Embracing Creativity and Challenges
00:06:12
Speaker
Now later in the week I had the last session of my singing course and in that session we wrote a song together. The process of doing this brought me so much joy. A real sense of joy. I had never written a song before. I used to make up silly songs all the time for my children. And in my childhood I played the organ for our church and led in the singing at the beginning of service.
00:06:37
Speaker
I used to be a part of a travelling singing group in my youth, and then I was a member of the choir at university. I have always loved to sing. However, throughout my adult life, I suppressed that part of myself for many reasons, but part of which was I did not feel worthy. I did not feel like I knew enough about music to sing. My limited piano and organ playing skills were not enough to warrant me calling myself a musician, and I had never had proper voice training, so I didn't really know
00:07:07
Speaker
how to use my voice to create the magic that others around me created with theirs. So I stepped out of the limelight to let those who deserved it more to shine. But back to the last lesson of the singing course I'd taken. Going through the process of writing a song in collaboration with the rest of the course participants was truly enlivening. Singing our course anthem was so empowering.
00:07:32
Speaker
We were all there to support each other through connecting to our unique voice, expressing the essence of who we are through sound. The whole experience of this course was empowering. It released so much trapped emotions from places deep down inside of myself that my yoga practice have just never quite got to or dislodged. So on the day that I knew I would be experiencing one of my lowest of lows,
00:08:01
Speaker
I decided not to lock myself away and wallow in my sadness, loneliness and unworthiness. Instead, I chose to do a number of things that would balance out those feelings, doing things at the other end of the spectrum. First of all, number one, I started my day with a short yoga practice.
00:08:21
Speaker
And then I spent time meditating, visualising a lotus flower blooming out of the mud. It helped that the day before I'd watched a video someone had shared on Instagram of that exact process. I was mesmerised by this clip and watched it over and over again, reminding myself that it's in the mud that the lotus flower forms and it reaches up to the light to bloom. Now, if I can find it, I'll share a link to that particular video in the show notes because
00:08:50
Speaker
It had such an impression on me. That's why I actually meditated on it the next morning. And the second thing I did was, as I chose my outfit for the day, I connected to the butterfly forming inside of me, imagining her wings forming. Because again, out of the muck is where the butterfly appears. Now I elected to where something that floated and flowed and was giving me that feeling of floating through this difficult day like a butterfly.
00:09:21
Speaker
The third thing I did was organize to do something with someone that related to the potential offerings in the new phase of my business evolution. After closing my commercial space, you know, something that would provide me with hope that not all of the opportunities for my business would be lost with letting go of this commercial space. There were other options out there.
00:09:42
Speaker
And then the fourth thing I did was connect with the glimpses of that first carriage I could see through the window of the wobbly void. I spent time in the afternoon sitting outside in the paddock with my drum and my dogs singing our course anthem that we co-created. I see singing as a part of my next stage. I'm not exactly sure how or what, but I would love for it to be a part of the healing journey that I help guide other people through.
00:10:10
Speaker
And the fifth thing I did was I took it one step further. I decided to dare to suck publicly and I filmed myself singing this song. Even the parts where I forgot the words and muddled up the lines and tried again to get it right. And I'll share the link in the show notes to this so you can witness my daring to suck in the hope that it inspires you to dare to suck at something too. Do something purely for the joy and not from fear of failure.
00:10:40
Speaker
Doing these things that I chose to do that day was not a way to suppress my feelings. It was a way to balance out my emotional experience. Just as much as things happen in our life that really truly suck, there are also experiences that we have that are really truly elevating and they don't always happen on the same day, but we can choose to make them happen for ourselves on the same day.
00:11:05
Speaker
Especially if we know ahead of time that something is coming up, that we know is going to take us to the deep depths of our pain, like I did. In business and in life, we experience highs and lows.
Reflecting on Growth and Connection
00:11:22
Speaker
What determines our destiny is how we choose to deal with them, respond to them, balance them. A big takeaway for me this past week was the frequency
00:11:33
Speaker
of experiencing the lowest lows makes experiencing the highest of highs even more magical. If we choose to operate at a monotone frequency, then we'll continue to live a nice life. But if we wish to reach the heights of our passions, we also need to be prepared to experience the depths of our pains.
00:11:55
Speaker
Thank you so much for your time. I know how valuable it is and I hope you got value out of listening to this podcast. If you are looking for a coach to support and guide you through your own unique journey of creating a life you love, then reach out for a connection call. And if you'd like to connect with other creative souls in person by joining us at a workshop or retreat or to book a unique shopping experience here at Creators Nest, I run those by appointment. So check out the website for more details. The link is in the show notes.
00:12:25
Speaker
Oh, and please leave a review. I'd love to hear any insights or inspirations that were activated in you from this podcast. And I look forward to drumming, dancing or soaring alongside of you.