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Hot Flashes, Hot Takes & Holiday Flicks
67 Plays18 days ago
This week, the sisters are all over the place in the best way. They kick things off with dog drama, sourdough starter anxiety, and a completely unnecessary debate over whether Oliver Hudson actually needs to act in a Hallmark-style holiday movie. ’Tis the season, so naturally they dive into the first festive pick of the year: A Merry Little Xmas on Netflix — worth it for Chet alone, who apparently spends half the movie half-naked.
Then they welcome menopause expert Kim Engelhardt, who breaks down what’s really going on with women’s hormones, why so many are dismissed by their doctors, why the medical field has failed women for decades, and why men would never be asked to “just deal with it.” Kim gives straight talk on symptoms, hormone therapy, sleep, bone health, and how to advocate for yourself. It’s the conversation every woman deserves but too few ever get.
Finally, Lynne brings it home with “What’s for Dinner,” featuring Ina Garten’s roast chicken that turns into chicken-and-dumpling soup the next night. Efficient. Cozy. Delicious.
👉 Get the recipes, links, and everything mentioned in this episode at ThreeLittleFishes.com/shownotes
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Transcript
Humorous Take on Menopause
00:00:00
Speaker
Have you seen my big fat Greek wedding? Oh, years ago. and the aunt is like talking about the menopause. I think menopause i think that that is menopause it's so funny because she talks like, like it's a disease. Like yeah she says like the hormones and I think like some of it is true because i think for some women,
00:00:27
Speaker
And I feel like I'm one of those women. I think my hormones like really play a role in my everyday, oh ha how I'm feeling. Absolutely. And I can relate to her. And I mean, not to that extent, but I just think I find humor in it because it's like, yeah, I i might have an unborn twin in me somewhere. i mean, I don't know. I don't know.
Introduction of the Hosts
00:00:52
Speaker
Welcome to Three Little Fishes. We're three sisters who grew up in the Midwest together, but have since spread across the country. i live in Los Angeles. I'm in Nashville. And I live in Philadelphia. We are all married with children, have all had careers, but now we stay at home with our families. join us as we share secre about being women, wives and mothers we welcome you to laugh along,
00:01:17
Speaker
learn something new reach out enjoying our conversation so let's jump in What's up, fishes?
Sneak Preview of 'Wicked 2'
00:01:27
Speaker
What's up, fishes? Good to see you. So Johanna and Tim got to go see Wicked, a sneak preview, and they said it was amazing. So if you are a Wicked fan and a theater fan, they say you're going to love Wicked 2. It opens this Friday.
00:01:46
Speaker
Go check it out. That's cool. She got to see it ahead of time. What a treat. Yeah. Yeah. Super neat.
Episode Topics Overview
00:01:53
Speaker
Okay, you guys, today on the pod, on our radar, the metapause and what's for dinner.
00:02:00
Speaker
but But before we get started, I just want to invite you all to go check out our website, 3littlefishes.com slash show notes. and subscribe.
00:02:12
Speaker
When you go there and you hit subscribe, you can get our show notes, all the recipes, everything that we've talked about. It's for free. And all you have to do is sign up with your email.
00:02:23
Speaker
All right, y'all. What's on our radar?
Pet Troubles Stories
00:02:28
Speaker
So this morning, I came home after only being gone a couple hours.
00:02:36
Speaker
And I walked in the back door Our carpet was in a huge ball, all like with shreds. And I was like, really? Wait a minute, your doormat, like the one that's like by your garage door, that big, heavy, like water hog? This is the interesting point about this.
00:02:57
Speaker
So it is like a water-based, like, i think we got it from Orvis, so they're pretty heavy mats. Yeah. She went to town and ate all that rubber stuff. Well, rubber is delicious. So did she just chew it and spit it out? Or do you have to like go get her stomach pumped? don't know. She's not getting her stomach pumped because I'm like too mad at her.
00:03:20
Speaker
oh here we come. I've already spent like a gazillion dollars at that place. Yeah. They probably send you like holiday gift basket every year. They should. I mean, your dog's been eating a lot stuff she's not supposed to. Like, isn't for Halloween. Didn't she eat like plastic eyeballs or something? And now she's eating like rubber mats. Like, that? don't think that's the worst. She ate the wall. Remember? She ate the wall. Yeah. But what? Yeah, last year when she was a puppy, she ate the corner of our drywall. Yeah, I would say, I mean, not to like, you know, not to be judgy, but it sounds like she's not having a lot of supervision. guess that tells me I can't leave her out of her crate
Sourdough Challenges
00:04:05
Speaker
anymore. You know, Kathy, I also am having like a tiny bit of dog drama. Our five-year-old, I took him in yesterday because he was kind of like scratching an ear. has a double ear infection.
00:04:18
Speaker
know And then the vet was like, so it's a yeast infection. It's probably brought on because the dog loves to swim in the pool. And she goes, you know, really what you should do is take a cotton ball and wipe out his ears every time he gets out of the water.
00:04:37
Speaker
Oh, God. is like I mean, no. No. planet are you looking on I'm not doing that. It's a dog. Like, I'll dry him off. I'll try to like, but I'm not having a bag of like cotton balls by the door so I can wipe out his ears. could like follow him around all day.
00:04:58
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, please. It's a water dog. It's gonna, I don't know. don't I was like, okay, yeah, that's a great idea. Let me get on that. No. Well, this is his first one in five years. So, I mean, it's not chronic, right? It's one time, hopefully. and hopefully he doesn't get like pillow ear. Like our dog got pillow ear. remember that. I remember So hopefully you don't have that.
00:05:24
Speaker
We're those people. We have all these animals. Kathy and I have been talking about sourdough because Kathy, we've, we talked about this online about how everybody's going to start their own sourdough starter. We all are supposed to be doing sourdough. Yes. Nancy. So I want to hear the update girls. like What's going on with your sourdough? Kathy, how's it going? Have you made your first loaf?
00:05:48
Speaker
so No, the loaf has not been made yet because I am having issues with the starter. keep feeding it.
00:05:59
Speaker
Well, I showed you that picture. It had lots of bubbles. and I thought, oh my gosh, super happy. Yeah. I'm going on like day like nine. That's okay. And then and I did the little water test to test. that That's not a super reliable. What you want to see is a lot of bubbles and you want to see it double. So once it doubles when you feed it,
00:06:19
Speaker
you know, and it's past day seven, i think you can start using it. oh Minimally, you can start using your discard because you're, you're, you do have happy starter and it's got a lot of bubbles in it. I'm not like a sourdough specialist or anything, but like I've been doing it for a couple of years. You're going to be fine to start using it. Nancy, how's your sourdough starter going?
00:06:40
Speaker
I have not started it yet. I don't understand what's wrong with you. You're the one that cooks the most. I know. i know what What's the prop, Nancy? I think that I'm having anxiety about it because over COVID, I tried to make sourdough and the starter and and I never worked out. And I think I'm having PTSD about it.
00:07:01
Speaker
And also... It's just, I'm feeling like it's a time commitment that I have to work, like I have to deal with it every single day. Like, will I forget? Well, you do for seven days. And then once it gets going, you can leave it in your refrigerator and then you can, you know, ignore it for a few days or a week even, or two weeks. Like an effort becomes get really mature. You can leave it in the refrigerator. If you leave it for a month and you pull it out,
00:07:28
Speaker
It'll have like hooch on the top of it that you can just pour out and you feed it and it's- I'm sorry, did you just say hooch? Yeah, it's hooch. it's That's what they call it. It's this like- liquid that means your starter is so hungry and it kind of liquefies and it people can stir it into i usually just pour it out it's like really i mean you just told me that kathy's been doing this for nine days and she still hasn't made a loaf of bread so it feels like but that's i think i'm on it eight days nancy eight days
00:08:02
Speaker
So yeah, does how many more days does she have She doesn't, she could cook now. So I should try it tonight? Yeah, just jump in. Just do it. All right. i I will say that I did not make sourdough, but I did make Julia Child's white sandwich bread. And it was very good. I've made that before. It's really good. We were all supposed to do this together.
00:08:27
Speaker
and Okay. All right. I commit today that I will, or this week, I will have some forward progress. Okay? Okay. We're going to hold you to it. All right.
00:08:39
Speaker
I mean, I've heard it before.
Holiday Movie Highlights
00:08:41
Speaker
So the other thing I think that I have noticed I'm doing a lot of beyond online shopping is all these like holiday movies are popping up.
00:08:52
Speaker
And i had the house to myself the other night and I watched an old holiday movie, Meet Me in St. Louis. So I don't know if it's technically a Christmas movie, but it does have White Christmas in it. Judy Garland sings White Christmas, which is amazing. I know you love that movie. You love it. I started watching a Christmas movie.
00:09:19
Speaker
What'd you watch? My husband's like, oh, what are you doing? Is this now the hallmark Christmas month that we're going to watch that movie? I said, yep, it started.
00:09:30
Speaker
So Alicia Silverstone is in a new movie. It's called A Merry Little Xmas. it's Oh my gosh, I know this with Oliver Hudson. Yes. It's actually, i yeah I thought it was cute. So I think you all should watch it.
00:09:49
Speaker
I think our viewers should watch it too. I mean, it's Oliver Hudson. is he a good actor? i mean. Like, yeah, I thought he was doing he did a good job. It's like a homework movie. How good you have to be? no, the lights fell down.
00:10:06
Speaker
no. ah I mean, I don't think there's anything like really deep happening in those movies. I mean, the one thing about this show is ah there's a character in this movie called Chet and he's like, you know, she's getting a divorce from her husband. And so Chet's like the new like little boyfriend fling or whatever.
00:10:28
Speaker
And he is funny in this movie. Chet, you like Chet? Yeah, because he's so like out there. It like gets naked. Wait, Hallmark is showing you a naked body? It's it's not it's not Hallmark. It's on Netflix. yeah But it's not HBO Max. It's kind of in between. No.
00:10:52
Speaker
How detailed are we getting? and Maybe I'll be in. yeah You just see Chet shirtless is up. Merry Christmas. You're my chest nuts. Oh, gosh.
00:11:04
Speaker
Okay, well, I... I don't know what's getting over it. Kathy, i i am I am on board with you. I think you it's the time a year to... embrace the silly movies, the traditional movies. Yeah, let's get in the holiday spirit. Let's just get happy. You want to see a half-naked chat? Let's do it.
00:11:26
Speaker
Bring it and that in That doesn't sound half-naked. It's so funny though. When i i saw a clip for this because I was on Netflix watching something else and I'm going to say something super mean but like Alicia Silverstone, i get so distracted by her lisp that I find myself like watching her mouth and like not watching the show.
00:11:56
Speaker
i don't know why i can't get over that. Does she have that? I don't think I've ever noticed. i You know, it's ah honestly, when you said that, I was like trying to think, did I notice she lisp? Because I normally do.
00:12:09
Speaker
Yeah, because you're a dentist, so I would think that would be something you would like... But I must have been like an average with Chet that I was like that. you Yeah, so old. I will tell you, like my old thing with Alicia Silverstone, I loved her in Clueless so much.
00:12:24
Speaker
i agree yeah She was great. She was good in that movie. Do you know how much time I spend with something going to put on my feet, like let alone anywhere else?
00:12:34
Speaker
I mean, it's such some fun lines. Yeah. She's like, should I leave him a note? she Yeah. She was so good. Yeah. All right, Nancy, that is your homework.
00:12:48
Speaker
Linda, you guys got to watch it. Tim, get ready. Here comes the homework channel and Netflix series. According to Kathy, you're welcome. Or maybe he'll just be like Peter and put in his like AirPods and be like, good night. And rolls over like, okay.
Discussion with Kim Englehart on Women's Health
00:13:06
Speaker
ah Okay, you guys, let's jump in So this week we had the pleasure of interviewing a woman who specializes in perimenopause and menopause. And she spent some time educating us about all of the different things symptoms and possible solutions and getting your life back during that time of life. So one thing I really think everybody should hear that she talked about that was really powerful to me, and I wish somebody would have told me this, you know, in my late 30s, early 40s is if you're not feeling like yourself and you go to the doctor and they say, well, this is just part of the process and They don't offer you any solutions. Walk out and don't go back.
00:13:57
Speaker
There's no reason to not feel comfortable in your own skin and really advocate for yourself. Life, yeah the medical community is catching up finally. so you know, listen to that part of the pod. It was, you know, it's empowering.
00:14:14
Speaker
Yes, it was a great conversation. And because it was, it ran really long. So we chopped it in two. So this week is about menopause. And in two weeks, it will be all about skincare. Here's our interview with Kim.
00:14:28
Speaker
Kim, welcome to the show. Thank you. Thank you so much. So for our listeners, who are you and what do you do, Kim? I am a nurse practitioner. Name is Kim Englehart. And I treat women going through perimenopause and menopause with hormone therapy. And I also have a medical aesthetics practice where i focus on skin.
00:14:52
Speaker
Why don't you tell us like a little bit about perimenopause and menopause and sort of like so some of the credentials that you have recently acquired in this like realm of Um, so my journey has been a little, and not straight, if you will. I've been a nurse for many years and a nurse practitioner for so many years. Um, but what happened was I have, um, I have a practice where I focus on medical aesthetics. And so I've had been in that industry for going on 10 years now.
00:15:30
Speaker
And, um, As I age and as the majority of the ladies that I take care of through that practice, um they age. And so i have, I found myself just spending my days talking to women and kind of, we were just sort of commiserating about the experiences that we're going through um,
00:15:50
Speaker
um you know, I just kind of kept hearing the same thing like i well, my doctor doesn't want to prescribe me anything or i didn't even know that was a symptom. And so really the the catalyst that changed for me was when I went to my own doctor and decided to have the conversation about, you know, the ah symptoms I've been having and um What I was told was that, you know, well, I was just completely brushed off and I was told, well, we'll talk about that when you're ready. And so it was very dismissive. And this was a provider that I'd gone to for over 20 years. And so um I decided, you know, this is not OK. Like women deserve better. And I had a history. i previously worked in endocrinology as a nurse practitioner. So I had a background in hormones and.
00:16:42
Speaker
So I decided to just di dive a little deeper and, educate myself. And and so that's what I've done. And i back in January was able to launch a new practice where I'm doing telehealth appointments for ladies focused purely on perimenopause and menopause and, um, helping them also with some weight maintenance and some weight issues. And, um, Recently, I became certified through the Menopause Society as a Menopause Society certified ah practitioner. So that's sort of the only legitimate certification that you can get to really show your credentials as a menopause provider. I mean, meaning, you know, which is crazy, right? Well, I think what it is crazy, but the the issue is a lot of times people often just assume this is your OBGYN's responsibility, like go see your OBGYN, talk to them about your menopause system. And i'm what I want to see and what is currently happening is it's really becoming any providers
00:17:52
Speaker
business like it shouldn't just be on your OBGYN because menopause really affects so many different parts of your body. um And they can't I mean, there's they're overwhelmed already with, you know, trying to to take care of their patients. And so um the menopause society likes, you know, they're trying to encourage more providers to become educated and become aware. And so they you know develop the certification to encourage people to do that. So, um, I'm really excited about it. And, um, so far I've been very, it's been very rewarding to, to be able to help women, um, just feel better.
00:18:32
Speaker
So is there like a common, so perimenopause is like kind of as you're edging into menopause, which can start a time between like 35 and 45, right?
00:18:45
Speaker
Yes. I mean, there's such a big window of time. Like some women can start having perimenopausal symptoms, you're correct, in their thirties. And, um, and they might, may not even know that that's what it is. And because some of the symptoms are so camouflaged by just other things. What could those camouflage symptoms be? So some women just start having changes in their menstrual period. Like they'll have more you know ah heaviness or they start getting their periods more often or there's just some change and they just don't really even know that that's actually related to they may be 39 and not think not even have thought about
00:19:30
Speaker
menopause yet because they think I'm just too young. Yeah. um Other changes are weight like, you know, there's just a change in how we our metabolism changes, how we store fat changes as that, you know, estrogen starts to go down. So someone just starts noticing I am doing nothing different, but I am I've gained 20 pounds and I've done nothing different. I'm eating the same. I'm working out the same again. They may not equate that to the transition. um ah Joint aches, pains, you know brain fog. There are so many things that women often just kind of chalk off to like- I'm just taking all
Menopause Symptoms and Self-Advocacy
00:20:10
Speaker
these notes. It's like so funny that you're here today. I woke up with a big zit on my face. yeah My clothes are fitting a little different, even though I'm fitting in them. And like yeah you said, I'm not eating any different or working out any different. yes And crazy thing too is like my libido is like increasing.
00:20:28
Speaker
which feels so weird to me considering that I'm zitty and feeling, you know, fat. Well, so that's, first of all, yay for you. because Yay for your husband. That, I will say is probably one of the most common things that I'm hearing from my patients is, The opposite is where, you know, the libido is not increasing. It's in fact decreasing and it's problematic, you know, ah for especially women who are in a relationship. And so um that is very common. But the issue with um ah hormones is that it is very chaotic during the transition phase. So Some days it's, you know, your estrogen levels are really high and some days they're really low. So it's there, there's really no consistency to it. And that's why a lot of women are dismissed because they will go and get labs done to that's because that's the only thing some providers know to do. Well, let's check your labs and let's see where you are. And then they're normal.
00:21:40
Speaker
Yeah. And so the provider at that point just moves on and says, well, your lab's normal. So, yeah. um But you really have to take the time to talk to people and to listen to them because nobody's story is the same as the person next to them. And so it's really important to just listen and and understand what you're going through and then try to try to find some ways to help.
00:22:04
Speaker
you know, make just make you feel better, feel like yourself again. You know, I'm so much older than both of you ladies. And i have talked to a bunch of like my girlfriends and it's interesting because the variety of complaints, like I have one friend who is like, I was about to lose my mind. Like I literally was like about to get in my car and drive away from everything because I can't, like, I was just so overwhelmed by everything that was going, everything was overwhelming her.
00:22:33
Speaker
And then I have another friend who was like, I haven't slept in months through the night. I'm exhausted. My head is pounding. And then I have like another friend who's like, I don't know what you girls are talking about. I'm older than you and I'm fine. So it's it is, it can be such a bleak time. and then you're still expected to kind of like live your life and do all the things that we do normally with a smile on your face. Yeah, so exactly. It's very ah tricky. Like I know for me, what I learned back in the day, i had so much estrogen that I was like hemorrhaging every month. And it went on for like,
00:23:15
Speaker
eight months and I kept going to specialists and they kept telling me everything was fine and blah, blah, blah. And I ended up in the ER like with two blood transfusions because like yes I had lost so much blood and I wasn't in my right mind.
00:23:28
Speaker
And I finally realized after that, that, you know, you have to be such an advocate for yourself. And it's so counterintuitive as women to be like, what do you mean? This is normal. It can't be normal. Help me. Yeah.
00:23:43
Speaker
Exactly. And, the you know, I had a similar situation with myself, like, again, had changes, went to the doctor, you know, same thing, you know, just increased heaviness with bleeding and was offered different options to address the bleeding.
00:24:02
Speaker
um But no one ever, I saw two specialists in OBGYN and none, neither one ever mentioned this is because of perimenopause. This is because of your transition. The only thing that was ever mentioned to me was, well, you know, in five, six years from now, like this, you won't have to worry about it because, you know, you'll you'll be menopausal then. And so it's like they just didn't even recognize that the the honestly the transition.
00:24:35
Speaker
Is sometimes the hardest part for women, so once they become menopausal, which by definition means you have not had a menstrual period for 12 months, then you're it's one day and you're menopause. And so anything prior to that, you are.
00:24:52
Speaker
perimenopausal or premenopausal before you start having symptoms. And then anything after that is postmenopausal. So okay in the old way of thinking is every, nothing really mattered until you were menopausal.
00:25:06
Speaker
And so you had to go for a whole year without having a period before anybody thought that you were, any treatment was warranted, put it that way. So thankfully now,
00:25:17
Speaker
Like times are changing and we have such great evidence and just more information to show not only do if you start treatment earlier, people feel better, but it also is beneficial for your overall health to intervene earlier.
00:25:35
Speaker
Yeah. Why, why were women having to suffer so much? Like, I know that this is like a hot topic right now. People are talking more about it, which is amazing, but it feels like we suffer a lot.
00:25:48
Speaker
Yes. Well, we do. and There's that's ah a very complicated answer, but there I will say this. Women generally just aren't studied a lot in medicine and especially women beyond the age of reproduction, um which is unfortunate because it's not my opinion, but in society's view, a lot of women, like the value goes, your value goes down once you are beyond the age of producing medicine.
00:26:18
Speaker
Children, ah they just haven't put a lot of time and effort into studying women. The other thing that um was most unfortunate was about, you know, little over 20 years ago, there was a big study done that unfortunately the data was misused.
00:26:38
Speaker
misinterpreted. And so what that study did or what the the findings, what it caused was hormones were taken away from everyone.
00:26:48
Speaker
Like they were deemed. they were Everybody thought you would get cancer, right? Yes. You were going to get, you were going to have a stroke and you were going to get breast cancer. So, god and and I was, I was one of those providers. Like I had finished my nurse practitioner training,
00:27:03
Speaker
the year that that was released. And so I was part of that, you know, group that took women off of hormones just because we thought at the time that was what was the safest thing. And so, you know, it's just ah it was a huge disservice. An entire generation of women unfortunately suffered with symptoms and um declining health because of that. um And so it's um We've learned a lot and they have actually reevaluated that. And the data that they released was just not it was flawed. So, yeah, it's they you know, it's a very nuanced discussion to have with your provider about if hormones are right for you or not. But they're certainly not the dangerous, um scary you know option that they have been painted to be for the last 20 years. yeah So if somebody were to come to you and like say, listen, my skin is breaking out. I'm having a hard time sleeping. my you know I'm putting on weight. I just don't feel, I don't know this body. Is there like a simple answer? Like for me, maybe like, I feel like this is a new development for me. Is there something...
00:28:19
Speaker
Is there not an easy pill to take or something, but is there, well, is there a simple answer for me to kind of get to know this body again and feel like myself or will never feel like my old self like myself?
00:28:34
Speaker
I had to learn to appreciate this new body. Like we're never going to be back to our 35, 30 year old self. Like we are changing. Our bodies are changing. But I think what's important is that you don't have to completely lose yourself like that.
00:28:53
Speaker
Part of my own journey was I just, I didn't feel like myself and I couldn't put my finger on it. Like I just knew, like I was not myself. And um so, but with part of it is just educating. I've learned, well, okay, well this makes sense now because that's why I'm feeling this way. So finding someone that you can talk to to, listen to you and listen to what your specific symptoms are. And they can educate you on why you're feeling that way and then offer you some options that are going to help you feel better.
00:29:27
Speaker
um But the important thing to know is even with, you know, if you are in a position where you could benefit from taking hormone therapy, you're still only looking at about ah like our goal is to get you about a 60 to 80 percent improvement in your symptoms. Like it's unrealistic to think.
00:29:48
Speaker
that you're going to feel 100% better. oh Yeah, that's just not realistic. So, okay you know, the goal is to feel better and to improve your health. And um there are so many ways to do that. It's very, it's not black and white. It's not cookie cutter. So, you know, i think that again, the most important thing is just to find somebody that is willing to listen to you. And that's so what a lot of women struggle with. They don't want to be, they can't find somebody that wants to spend the time to, yeah to, to listen to them.
00:30:22
Speaker
Yeah. Um, I, I noticed as I've aged. I'm like shriveling up and drying out. Like a little shriveling raisin like on every level, like head to toe, shriveled up, dried out. yes What are some of the tips that you can give the shriveled up old lady? How can we help? Well, there's science behind that. So estrogen is a very important hormone that helps with not only the you know, moisture in our skin, but like throughout our body. Yeah. So as you start to lose that, you are going to notice like more skin dryness, um collagen decreases, which helps collagen is what makes our skin youthful and yeah glowy and plump. So
00:31:13
Speaker
All those things start to go away as you age and lose estrogen. But it's also not just in your face. Like it's throughout your body. Like a lot of women, they just present because they're so itchy. Like they don't know why, but they're so itchy and they cannot understand it. Like the elephant skin on the tops of the thighs. What in hell happened there? That's not right. Exactly. so A lot of times if you just like, again, and it's not for everyone and there's this, you'd have to have a discussion with your provider, but a lot of women, they will get on estrogen and they just stop itching. And it's such a, ah such a relief. And like some women never itch. Like that's not one, that's not something that bothers them. totallyly
00:32:01
Speaker
But it's just the changes that that it's kind of like, you know, the, That hormone is... it's There are receptors just through all throughout the body. And so people generally just associate estrogen with reproduction and with your menstrual cycle. its But it's it's just not. it's It's pervasive all through the body.
00:32:22
Speaker
like I know what's hot right now is people drinking collagen. I know that Lynn definitely likes it. I think Kathy does too. i think my parents are even drinking it. I mean, i'm like...
00:32:35
Speaker
Does this work? Should I like take this myself? Like, what are your thoughts on that? um I'm sort of on the fence about it. So I have a lot of people ask me that. And from a physiology standpoint, it doesn't make a lot of sense that drinking collagen is going to be able to make a change in your skin.
00:32:59
Speaker
But I have had enough people tell me that they really see a difference with using it. So it's like anything, you know, if it, if you feel like it's helping you and if it's not causing you any harm, then I don't see any harm in using it. I don't use it personally as a, I don't drink collagen or take any collagen supplements, but, um,
00:33:25
Speaker
I think it's just a preference if if you want to and to do it or not. You know, the other thing I'd like to do what I've noticed as I've aged is vitamin d is such a big deal. Yeah.
00:33:38
Speaker
It is. Right? Yes. That I absolutely behind. I mean, they're laughing because I'm kind of a witch doctor. so I'm always like it's trying to come up with like, how can I make life better? Blah, blah, blah. You know what I mean? Without the prescription.
00:33:55
Speaker
And so I take vitamin D with k every day. That's good. Vitamin D and calcium, I would say, would be like what I...
00:34:07
Speaker
recommend most for women just because here's a frightening statistic for you.
Importance of Nutrition and Exercise for Bone Health
00:34:12
Speaker
One in two women will have an osteoporotic fracture in their lifetime. So half of us will have a fracture i'm writing this down related to ah you know weak bones and here's another kind of terrifying statistic that you may not know is that you have the most accelerated rate of bone loss during the final years of your perimenopause transition
00:34:41
Speaker
and into your menopause transition. So a lot of times the years that women may not even be aware that this is what's happening to their body. And especially they may not even being given any advice or guidance on what they can be doing to strengthen their bones and to preserve their bones.
00:35:01
Speaker
um Vitamin D, calcium are great to do to to you know help with our bone strength. um The other thing is just, you know, weightlifting, you lifting weights at least twice a week is really is what's going to keep your bones strong and staying active. And then, of course, you know, estrogen, that's one of the one of the things that has been approved for is for osteopenia, which is, you know, where your bones are weakening. They're not quite to what's called osteoporosis, but it's, you know,
00:35:39
Speaker
definitely scary to think, you know, um you break a hip or you break a vertebra in your back. And then a lot of times that alone will um increase your risk of death by like 30% in the first year. and So it's, it's terrifying. And so definitely vitamin D calcium,
00:35:59
Speaker
getting your exercise in, you know weightlifting, doing all you can, because it's so much easier to keep the bone that you have instead of trying to build new bone. Because we're kind of on this, it's kind of like with our skin cells is how our bones are. Like you're constantly making new skin cells, but we're also kind of breaking down and exfoliating skin cells. So the same thing's happening with your bones. and it But what happens is as you age, the breaking down process is big. more accelerated than the building process. So you get to a point where you you cross that threshold where you get weak, fragile bones. Is it ever too late to...
00:36:38
Speaker
to build up your bones? Like, do you ever miss a window of being like, you know what? I haven't been doing this and I'm now 45. No, it's never too late. It's never too late. I mean, again, there are certain times where you're going probably be at a bigger disadvantage just because if you have lost more bone, it's harder to get it back. So definitely the sooner you start, the better. But I mean, as as long as you're capable, it's never too late to make those those changes to try to increase that bone density.
00:37:11
Speaker
So do you have, do you have any tricks for sleep then? Well, so sleep, um that is another very common symptom that women report is I cannot fall asleep or I fall asleep and I wake up at 3am and I'm wide awake and I lay there and I look, yeah, and I cannot get back to sleep. So the hormone progesterone plays a big role in sleep.
00:37:36
Speaker
And when you are transitioning through perimenopause into menopause, your progesterone just goes away. Like it just, it like falls off a cliff and it doesn't come back. compare It's gone. Bye-bye. Peace out, progesterone. So the difference is whereas estrogen, you kind of get this surge. It's like a roller coaster of estrogen. You get a lot and then none and then a lot and none. Progesterone, it just goes and it's gone. So progesterone, can some people refer to it as the calm, sleepy hormone because it just kind of helps calm you and helps you sleep. So a lot of women will report progesterone
00:38:17
Speaker
They feel more anxious. Their anxiety ramps up during those years. They don't know why, but they just feel like they're, you know, more anxious. So if you can start a lady on some progesterone, I mean, it is like a light switch for a lot of them Like the light switch just like in the, it goes off, if you will. So you come to sleep.
00:38:38
Speaker
Yes. And then calm. I mean, you will be you you know, if you're not sleeping, you don't feel well the next day. so that can contribute to more of that irritability, that anxiety, that brain fog, the fatigue, all of that. So progesterone is a very safe option. It's, um, Given at nighttime, again, it you know it helps you sleep better. um So if if that's something that you are a candidate for, that's what I offer.
00:39:11
Speaker
usually first for my patients who are having difficulty with sleeping. And then of course, just the regular sleep, um, health, you know, things like trying not be on your phone at late at night and things like that, and just decrease in stimulation right before you go to bed. but sometimes you can do all that and you still can't sleep.
00:39:31
Speaker
And so, or you fall asleep and you wake up in the middle of the night, which is what I used to have. So, um, so you know, I am in menopause now. So kind of like there's really no symptoms or anything other making sure I get enough calcium and vitamin D and I do weight lift and try and exercise and stuff like that. I'm kind of like over that hump, but I remember back in the day and I remember kind of being mad about it. Cause I was like, I've like given three chill, wonderful humans to this world. I've done all the things I've been a teenager. And now I'm a fucking teenager again. That's what it feels like. But you have all the responsibilities that come with being full-time adult. Like, where is the happiness and joy we can find in this time where you're kind of, you feel like you're climbing cliff, like climbing a cliff and you're able to fall off the cliff. Yes. I think what you have to do, and I'm still trying to find it too, because like I said, I'm
00:40:38
Speaker
I'm still on this journey myself. um you What i have come to appreciate and what i hear from a lot of my patients that I help is like, you just don't have to care as much anymore, like about little things that used to really bother you. um you know, you learn like what really matters, what doesn't matter. And there's just almost like a a freedom of, of this aging where, you know, you, that's how I feel. And that's how a lot of ladies that I speak to
00:41:15
Speaker
relate to like where is in my thirties, early forties, like I was so worried about, things that now i'm like, it it really doesn't matter. Like it doesn't matter. And so let it go. um Let it go. let go now i wish I was there. girls sound so healthy. I still on pretty tight.
00:41:34
Speaker
i was going to say, if you speak to my husband or my kids, they may disagree with you or disagree with what I'm saying, but I truly feel like there is so many positives about this. um It's just a really hard journey. And yeah,
00:41:51
Speaker
What happens is, ah I don't know if it's true with you ladies, but like our moms just weren't told, like they weren't told what's happening. And it was just kind of like, oh, everybody just deals with it. Like we don't talk about it. You just deal with it. right And so, and they just kind of had to suffer through. so um I feel like things are changing now and now we can talk about it and it can be,
00:42:16
Speaker
more, you know, in our daily conversations and you just don't feel so isolated. Right. I do feel that isolation and that lack of isolation is so pivotal for mental health.
00:42:28
Speaker
Yes. And if you talk to all your friends about what's going on, even beyond, then you can go into your provider and be like, but this is real. Like you don't feel crazy. Cause I sometimes, yeah like, even for me, I'm like probably 10 years older than you.
00:42:44
Speaker
going through that, my doctor was like, you're fine. This is normal. This is normal. This is normal. But I almost bled to death. Like that's not normal. i was the same way. It's not normal. And And here's the the deal. Like, it it wouldn't be the same for a man. If a man were to walk in and and present with multiple symptoms, they wouldn't be told, well, um you're just going to have to deal with it. That's just part of aging. um
00:43:14
Speaker
And so, again, i think times are changing and more awareness is is happening now. But there's still so much to do. Like, there's still so many...
00:43:25
Speaker
providers who just don't know, like they, and I, you can't be mad at them because they don't know what they don't know. They don't know. I know, and I was part of that generation. My husband is part of that generation where, you know, when we were trained, we just weren't trained appropriately. So it's up to people like myself and other providers now who are advocates to try to to change the narrative and and get people better prepared. So Kim, kind of like wrapping up this whole perimenopause, menopause topic, because I do want to talk to you about skin in a minute, but okay to our listeners, if they're going through perimenopause right now, what are the top three things that you would say
00:44:11
Speaker
they should think about, do talk to, like, what are the top three things they should, like you would recommend for someone going through this transition? ah Number one, find a provider that will listen to you and not just want to check your labs,
00:44:31
Speaker
and base treatment on that because that is most of the time irrelevant. um Labs can play a role in treatment options, but they should not be the primary driver of your treatment plan. um So find a provider that's willing to listen. um Find a support network. like either if that's in your spouse or some friends, because you have to have somebody that you can talk to and relate to.
00:45:01
Speaker
when you're going through this. Again, i mentioned earlier, I live in a house of all men. So I have a husband and three boys. And so none of them have a clue, a clue about what it feels like to to go through this part of life. So you got to find your network somehow of of people. And then um i really think just, you know,
00:45:24
Speaker
making it a priority to move your body, like whether that's just going for a walk every day, you know, weightlifting, ah like I said, is it' so beneficial for our bones, but also just for our mental health. And this is a very trying time on women and mentally,
00:45:42
Speaker
physically, emotionally, all of all of the above. um So um I guess that you know that would be the top three things that I would recommend. There's so many things. We at the Three Fishes, that's why we started this was to connect with people and support one another. And I do think as you age, it's so critical to have that like network of women that you can be honest and open with.
00:46:11
Speaker
yeah Absolutely. And share their experiences with you because we don't know all the answers. Nobody does. But we need each other. There are. No one knows all the answers. So that's the thing. And it's it's really just, um again, a very nuanced topic. And it's very specific to whoever you're speaking to. that Their symptoms are totally different than yours. But that the whole...
00:46:35
Speaker
process is the same. Like we're all going to go through it. Um, it's just going to be different. and Um, can I ask you one question as you say that do all women experience some sort of symptoms or no, no, not necessarily. Like I have several women who have told me,
00:46:58
Speaker
you know, maybe at this point, they're 60, early 60s, and they'll say, I why i don't know. ah i I mean, I just stopped having a period. I didn't really have a lot of symptoms. So not everyone, mean, those are few, honestly. would say the majority of women experience some symptoms. yeah um But again, they may not have recognized that what they they were feeling what was actually related to transitioning from perimenopause to menopause, because a lot of the things just get disguised as, well, I'm just tired. I'm just overworked. I'm just overstressed or, you know, yeah so they don't necessarily pinpoint that that's, you know, because perhaps women think, well, i didn't have hot flashes or I didn't wake up sweaty or, you know, all the the kind of the classic symptoms that you hear about.
00:47:50
Speaker
But that doesn't mean they didn't experience others. They may just not have known. But not everyone experiences them. Yeah. Right. So I want to ask one last question and that is do men go through something similar and is there a name for it? No. and ah Of course they don't. Of course they don't. Well, let me say this. Men do have a decrease in their production of testosterone. It doesn't go away. so that's the big difference. Women,
00:48:21
Speaker
it it goes away like the ovaries just quit and so and then we can live you know another one-third of our life in that phase where we're not making that hormone that we've made um for years and years. And so with men, yes, they have a change, like they're definitely have a decline in their testosterone, which can make, you know, them feel ah different, like can have decreased energy, they can have, you know, sexual dysfunction, they can have brain fog as well. But um it's just not as drastic. And it's not as what's the word like they they're just it's, it's more acceptable, like, you know, socially acceptable. And they're they're more likely to get intervention and get help than women are for the most part.
00:49:10
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah, that tracks. Hi, guys. Kathy, you made it. All those technical difficulties. Happy to see you. yeah I'm so sorry, everybody. This is an important podcast. I didn't want to miss either. Have you seen My Big Fat Greek Wedding?
00:49:30
Speaker
that Oh, years ago. Yes. Years ago. and that, the aunt. an It's like talking about the menopause. Gosh, the menopause. i Remind me. All my life, I had a lump at the back of my neck. Then I start the menopause and the lump got bigger from the hormones. It started to grow.
00:49:49
Speaker
She talks like like it's a disease. like yeah She says like the hormones. And I think some of it is true because i think for some women,
00:50:02
Speaker
And I feel like I'm one of those women. I think my hormones like really play a role in my everyday. oh ah absolutely. Absolutely they do. I can relate to her. but go to the doctor and he did the biopsy.
00:50:19
Speaker
And inside the lump, he found teeth, and a spinal column. Yes, inside the lung was my twin.
00:50:30
Speaker
I might have an unborn twin in me somewhere. I mean, I don't know. ah okay It's so, yes, it is. And it's like you said, like she called it the menopause. Like it looked, it was, it, it, it has been looked at as like.
00:50:49
Speaker
have this disease. Exactly. And like women were ah embarrassed to, to even mention the word. And like, if you said like, you know, woman was menopausal, like it was kind of like, you know, just, Ooh. And so now, you know, it's really changing and it's,
00:51:06
Speaker
It's becoming less taboo, if you will. And like, it's just part of it. Like it's, it's what we go through, just like kids go through puberty and we're kind of going in through puberty in reverse. Like it's just a transition.
00:51:21
Speaker
I know the hormones running in my house between me and my teenage son. The battle. Preach. times. Yes. Good times. have three teenagers currently. So it's, yeah. Yeah. It's quite a household. Yeah, I have the same.
00:51:38
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. So we can all commiserate together. Mm-hmm. yeah All right, you guys, that was a lot of good information. And something that I am really taking away are three things that she said, find a provider that listens to you, find a support system and know your body.
00:51:59
Speaker
So I think those three takeaways were super helpful it was a great conversation and because it was it ran really long so we chopped it in two so in two weeks it will be all about skin care yes all right y'all what's for dinner So dinner this week, I did a roast a whole roasted chicken, which actually Nancy does all the time and I do not. But I followed Ina Garten's Jeffrey's roast chicken recipe. So I made that for dinner. And then with the leftovers, I put the carcass in a big pot. I made a big thing of
00:52:39
Speaker
bone broth and I use that bone broth to make chicken and dumplings the following day. So we got two meals. on yeah And I still have some bone broth in the refrigerator that we're going to use, which will be helpful because my husband has a cold. um But anyway, we'll post these recipes. It's real.
00:52:59
Speaker
Hope you make it rich. It's going to be fine. Anyway, happy cooking. We'll post it in the show notes. We want to thank you for listening to our podcast and letting us sisters jump into your day. Please make sure to hit the subscribe button you can access our show notes and all of our previous podcasts.
00:53:22
Speaker
Also, please share our podcast with your other little fishes so we can grow. And please, little fishes, join the sisters in watching a Married Little Xmas so we can get our holiday groove on. well We'll probably be watching a new show every week till the holidays are here.
00:53:42
Speaker
So please join us. It's on Netflix and let us know what you think of it. Have a wonderful weekend. Sisters out.