Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Stay Sparked #28 - "Modern Romance"
7 Plays2 years ago
This week we talked ROMANCE! What is the difference between trying to impress someone and genuinely being present? How can we experience true Gifting as a part of dating and romance? And what are some small ways that yield big impacts when it comes to being romantic?
LINKS MENTIONED:
Eden
HOSTS
BETSY FINKLEHOO is a healer of massage therapy, CranioSacral and Dharma Coaching. She is an 8 year burner and has spent the last several years seeped in the personal development world, cultivating her passion for transformation and growth. Her recent project, The Power Affirmation Journal and virtual group empowers women to cultivate self awareness and healthy habits so they can live in greater freedom, mind body and spirit.
http://poweraffirmation.com/
Click here to get a FREE affirmation for Stay Sparked Listeners!
HALCYON is full-time Love Ambassador. He is the founder of Hug Nation YouTube channel and daily zoom gratitude circles. He is co-founder of the Pink Heart Burning Man camp and the 1st Saturdays project for people experiencing homelessness. In his free time he coaches individuals on how to live joyfully and authentically. His other podcast is "Hard on the 80's."
http://JohnStyn.com
JANUS REDMOON is a 10-time Burner, and has spent the last several years as an advocate for psychedelic medicine research and treatment. He is the founder and CEO of NuWorld Nutritionals, a nutritional supplement company providing mushroom-based, all-natural products to improve and maintain health for both body and mind. (Use code "SPARKED" for 10% off)
http://www.nuworldnutritionals.com
MASSIVE Thank you to Dub Sutra for their beautiful opening music. Check out their incredible music catalogue online.
https://dubsutra.com
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Stay Sparked
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Stay Sparked.
00:00:04
Speaker
On this show, we explore how to stay inspired in the modern world through the most profound lessons from Burning Man, relationships, entrepreneurship, psychedelics, spirituality, travel, and more.
Keeping the Spark Alive in Relationships
00:00:18
Speaker
On today's episode, we talked about romance and how do we start and continue a relationship with heat and romance and sparks.
00:00:29
Speaker
We talked about all kinds of fun, creative ways to keep that romance alive in long-term partnerships and also in the dating.
00:00:35
Speaker
We also touch on the importance of romance, keeping that alive and the little things we can do to keep things burning that aren't actually so little.
00:00:45
Speaker
Enjoy the episode.
Meet the Hosts: Betsy, Halcyon, and Yanus
00:00:49
Speaker
Hello out there and welcome to Stay Sparked.
00:00:52
Speaker
We are three longtime friends who have been inspiring each other and lighting each other up for over a decade and we are here to share conversations to inspire and light you up.
00:01:02
Speaker
Thank you so much for listening.
00:01:04
Speaker
Thank you for spreading the sparks as well by sending these podcasts out to your friends and leaving us reviews on Apple Podcasts.
00:01:12
Speaker
Always so grateful to share this inspiration.
00:01:15
Speaker
I'm Betsy.
00:01:16
Speaker
I'm Halcyon.
00:01:18
Speaker
And I'm Yanus.
00:01:20
Speaker
I am the founder of the Power Affirmation Project, teaching life skills for sustainable happiness.
00:01:27
Speaker
I am a love ambassador who shares wisdom through t-shirts, podcasts, a YouTube channel called Hug Nation.
00:01:36
Speaker
And I am the founder and CEO of a nutritional supplement company titled New World Nutritionals.
00:01:42
Speaker
We have mushroom-based products designed to elevate and improve your state of mind.
00:01:47
Speaker
Amazing.
Gratitude and Solitude
00:01:49
Speaker
Well, we always love starting off these conversations with gratitude.
00:01:53
Speaker
Always a wonderful way to start any conversation.
00:01:56
Speaker
So, Yanis, what are you grateful for today?
00:01:59
Speaker
Today, I am grateful for moments of solitude.
00:02:08
Speaker
I've got a partner who's wonderful.
00:02:09
Speaker
We live together and I'm pretty busy with work and such.
00:02:12
Speaker
But every now and again, a couple of times a week, I'll get a moment of or a complete day of solitude where my partner is gone for about 24 hours and
00:02:22
Speaker
I can just kind of be still and silent in my place.
00:02:26
Speaker
And it's really, you know, I get about maybe one one one or two of those days a week.
00:02:30
Speaker
And it's I cherish those days.
00:02:32
Speaker
They're great because just it's a loud world.
00:02:34
Speaker
So it's nice to be able to have some peace and quiet and silence and solitude where I can just attend to, you know, my own stuff, my own affairs.
00:02:43
Speaker
So definitely feel gratitude for that.
00:02:47
Speaker
So good.
00:02:48
Speaker
Beautiful.
00:02:49
Speaker
Thank you for sharing.
00:02:50
Speaker
How about you, Halcyon?
00:02:52
Speaker
I am grateful for some time I spent yesterday with a couple that had been together for 53 years and was sharing this active love affair and their processes of really deeply pursuing, adoring and being dedicated to one another that I just was so inspired.
00:03:14
Speaker
So I'm grateful for time spent with Dawn and Martha yesterday.
What Does Romance Mean Today?
00:03:17
Speaker
Hmm, so beautiful.
00:03:19
Speaker
So much inspiration.
00:03:20
Speaker
53 years.
00:03:23
Speaker
Well, I will share in a similar thread.
00:03:26
Speaker
I'm really grateful for one-on-one time with people that I love and care about and also with new friends.
00:03:34
Speaker
So I really cherish one-on-one time with people.
00:03:38
Speaker
I made some space last weekend to go have a couple of lunch dates and a couple of beach walks.
00:03:44
Speaker
And I just really always gain so much inspiration from those conversations that I have with people that
00:03:50
Speaker
And sometimes it's hard to schedule, of course, because there's a finite amount of time in each week and we're all busy people.
00:03:56
Speaker
But sometimes just 45 minutes to an hour with somebody is just so inspiring.
00:04:01
Speaker
And I just feel those conversations just leave a ripple or trail of insight and considerations throughout my week and many days ahead.
00:04:12
Speaker
So I'm really grateful for my one-on-one time with my friends.
00:04:16
Speaker
Yay.
00:04:17
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
00:04:17
Speaker
Mm-hmm.
00:04:19
Speaker
All right.
00:04:20
Speaker
Well, on today's episode, we decided to talk similar about relationships, but really in the vein of romance.
00:04:30
Speaker
In today's day and age, what does romance mean?
00:04:33
Speaker
Modern romance, how do we experience romance?
00:04:36
Speaker
Does it make a difference in our lives?
00:04:39
Speaker
There's so much to unpack on this conversation, especially since all three of us have been on the journey of dating and being in
00:04:46
Speaker
long-term, short-term relationships.
00:04:49
Speaker
So I'm excited to unpack this conversation with you guys.
00:04:54
Speaker
And so as a woman in this conversation, I'm so curious from you guys around your experience of
00:05:02
Speaker
Being a man in the dating world, I'm sure you guys both have dated plenty before you found your long-term partners.
00:05:10
Speaker
And I'm just curious on how has that felt for either of you being a man in relationship to a woman and romance?
Challenges of Authentic Dating
00:05:23
Speaker
Oh, boy.
00:05:23
Speaker
It's an interesting thinking about historically how I've felt about dating and how I've grown into it as I feel like I'm becoming more and more who I am.
00:05:36
Speaker
And I think that my early dating was really scarred and really damaged by a
00:05:44
Speaker
a fear of being too much and fear of being like that guy that is coming on too strong.
00:05:50
Speaker
And I think that I was way too timid in my early years and early dating and would often wait until I was pursued or wait until there was like an obvious sign.
00:06:00
Speaker
And I really feel like I missed out on a lot of connecting with beautiful people because I was, I think, overly sensitive to what women have to go through in our culture about being hit on so much.
00:06:12
Speaker
And so I think that I never found the right way to hit on someone without it being hitting on someone.
00:06:19
Speaker
How do I start a connection with a potential beautiful human being without making their experience feel a burden by being a woman in the world?
00:06:31
Speaker
That's so fascinating, right?
00:06:32
Speaker
Because it's not taught.
00:06:33
Speaker
Not like in school, there's a class that says, okay, here's a class for everybody to learn how to approach somebody that you're interested in dating or being intimate with.
00:06:43
Speaker
And the ones that are teaching, and the ones that are teaching, are teaching pickup artist stuff.
00:06:48
Speaker
Right.
00:06:48
Speaker
And I don't, I don't want to be that.
00:06:50
Speaker
I don't want to be like, oh, so let me neg you and let me make you feel bad so that you want to date me, which is that I can go online and I can learn how to do that.
00:06:57
Speaker
But that's not what I want to be.
00:07:01
Speaker
no and i i kind of came at it from maybe the opposite uh direction of halcyon i probably could i probably could have been a little more concerned about the women's uh experience in the whole dating realm uh and the idea of romance i was definitely i wasn't i wasn't like ever like committed or on the
00:07:24
Speaker
track of being a full turn pickup artist or anything like that.
00:07:27
Speaker
But I definitely was like looking into that, you know, I had, I had my lines like, you know, practiced and rehearsed.
00:07:35
Speaker
I'd be in the bars, like meeting me, you know, trying to meet women and met quite a few.
00:07:40
Speaker
And it's, um, but there was, that was a, that was part of my own journey of like self-love and
00:07:48
Speaker
And realizing that there was a lot of self-love lacking in that.
00:07:52
Speaker
And so for me, like seeking this external validation and putting way too much on women who already have like so much in this world that they have to deal with, as opposed to some guy trying to get some love that he's missing
Lessons from Burning Man on Authenticity in Romance
00:08:08
Speaker
in his life.
00:08:08
Speaker
And, you know, be my source of love.
00:08:10
Speaker
Oh my gosh.
00:08:11
Speaker
So I look back a little bit of cringe in my early, my early, my
00:08:17
Speaker
my early twenties and frankly, even up to like early thirties as well, but came around and now it's a point now I'm, now I'm feeling, now I'm feeling good about that.
00:08:28
Speaker
And with where, how I tend to approach, you know, the idea of, of romance and, and how, how that's important for everybody.
00:08:36
Speaker
That's so powerful reflections.
00:08:38
Speaker
You know, something sparks for me hearing that because there's, there's this very interesting feeling of, you know, giving, I'm going to use the example of giving a rose, right?
00:08:49
Speaker
This is a gesture of romance, like giving a rose to somebody is kind of saying like, Hey, I like you.
00:08:54
Speaker
Right.
00:08:56
Speaker
And it also can come with this other part that you spoke to right around actually, can you fill a void?
00:09:01
Speaker
Right.
00:09:03
Speaker
I'm, I'm lacking love within myself.
00:09:05
Speaker
So I'm going to make this gesture of, of romance to get somebody else to fill something inside of me.
00:09:12
Speaker
Right.
00:09:12
Speaker
And it's a very subtle, a lot of times unconscious act.
00:09:16
Speaker
Right.
00:09:16
Speaker
And so I know I personally have felt that as a woman I've had, I've noticed, um, you know, certain times where a guy would try and ask me out or do something, uh, elaborate to impress me or whatever, but it was coming from a place of insecurity and,
00:09:32
Speaker
And I could feel that it's a very interesting, you know, to be sensitive to that.
00:09:36
Speaker
Um, and it's, uh, yeah, it's an interesting kind of journey to be on, to be able to self reflect on that.
00:09:42
Speaker
And that's cool that you've been able to see that old part of you who used to do that.
00:09:47
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:48
Speaker
Well, and I got to say, I think a lot of that coincided with my introduction and experience of Burning Man.
00:09:57
Speaker
It's so funny how so much of my life comes back around to that chapter of my life being a real marker and really a real eye-opener.
00:10:08
Speaker
to how I approach things.
00:10:11
Speaker
And the main lesson for me coming with my Burning Man experience was about, we've spoken about it before, authenticity and inauthenticity and how that applies to so many parts of my life.
00:10:23
Speaker
And
00:10:25
Speaker
So taking getting that lesson be like, wow, it's like I'm, I'm better off being authentic.
00:10:30
Speaker
And whoever vibes with it vibes with and who doesn't doesn't that's fine.
00:10:34
Speaker
And then applying that into the area of romance be like, you know, I don't have to like, come with all these lines and flowers and this thing and everything.
00:10:42
Speaker
Just, you know, what's your good opening line?
00:10:45
Speaker
Good opening line is, hi, my name is so-and-so.
00:10:48
Speaker
I'd like to meet you or whatever.
00:10:51
Speaker
Just being authentic and letting it flow from that way.
00:10:54
Speaker
The results you get from that, I think we all know at this point, they just feel better.
00:11:00
Speaker
They just feel better for me.
00:11:01
Speaker
Yeah.
00:11:02
Speaker
You know, it's so interesting as you're talking, I'm thinking about when you are
00:11:08
Speaker
using lines or, or worse, you know, tactics or, you know, there's, there's, I think you're trying to get to a destination that is, is like a score, you know, or is it, or a filling a void?
00:11:22
Speaker
I want this hit of, I want, I want to win them over or I want to sleep with them.
00:11:29
Speaker
But the, if the destination is partnership, you know,
00:11:33
Speaker
then it doesn't make any sense to try to have a presentation, impress with something that isn't authentic because you can't live in a state of performance forever.
00:11:48
Speaker
You need, if you want something sustainable, you have to pretty darn quickly say, this is what I'm selling.
00:11:54
Speaker
It's this, exactly this.
00:11:57
Speaker
And if you don't like this as it is, then eventually we're going to have problems.
00:12:03
Speaker
Yes, and to add on to that, you know, because you can be you in your friendships, right?
00:12:09
Speaker
Or I can be who I am in my friendships.
00:12:11
Speaker
And when that person comes into your life that you have, there's an extra charge, you know, how do we express that?
00:12:19
Speaker
Right.
00:12:20
Speaker
So this is where romance comes in.
00:12:22
Speaker
These gestures of, of, um, I don't know, of interest or a flirtation or of, you know, the little extra sparkles.
00:12:31
Speaker
Right.
00:12:32
Speaker
And so one of the things I've been really fascinated by in my own personal journey has been like how to cross over.
00:12:38
Speaker
Right.
00:12:38
Speaker
Because I've had a lot of male friends that have always been in the friend zone.
00:12:44
Speaker
And I, you know, was always curious.
00:12:46
Speaker
I wonder maybe something would be there, but nobody ever says anything.
00:12:51
Speaker
And so we're just being friends forever, you know?
00:12:54
Speaker
And so where is that, the authentic expression of romance coming through to be able to shift over, right?
00:13:03
Speaker
And so I feel like this day and age, yeah, how to do that without the like,
00:13:08
Speaker
Yeah, like you're saying the pickup lines or the like, okay, you got to read this book and say, you know, okay, you got, you know, somebody calls you, then you have to wait a certain amount of time to respond.
00:13:19
Speaker
Or if somebody texts you five words, you can only text five words back, you know, it's a game.
00:13:25
Speaker
Right.
00:13:26
Speaker
It's like crazy.
Expressing Romantic Interest Authentically
00:13:27
Speaker
I actually was talking to a male friend of mine.
00:13:29
Speaker
He's reading one of those books and it was like, oh, wow.
00:13:32
Speaker
There are certain things in there that says like, well, if you're really interested in her, then you have to ask her out for a Tuesday or Wednesday, but not a weekend.
00:13:40
Speaker
Because if you ask her out on the weekend, then that's too much.
00:13:42
Speaker
You know, there's all this psychological stuff that seems to like muck up or confuse people in a way.
00:13:49
Speaker
And it's like, how do we get to that place of authenticity that is of
00:13:53
Speaker
of playful romance.
00:13:56
Speaker
Well,
00:13:59
Speaker
I feel it's we got to be careful with this whole like when we approach romance as like a game or I'm going to win her over.
00:14:11
Speaker
We need to, you know, the whole idea of like your words like matter, like, you know, your words are like casting a spell and things.
00:14:20
Speaker
If we treat like romance like a game, a game has a winner and a loser.
00:14:26
Speaker
And if we're trying to win somebody over, like if we play the game right, that means we win.
00:14:32
Speaker
Well, OK, but a game has a winner and loser.
00:14:36
Speaker
So if you win, who lost?
00:14:37
Speaker
So you got to like you got to we got to be careful about this stuff and just just get throw throw all that stuff away and just be.
00:14:46
Speaker
Now, there's a fine line between relating authentically with somebody.
00:14:51
Speaker
And also, you know, the idea like, you know, you never meet somebody new.
00:14:56
Speaker
Like you don't meet who that person is for a while until like you're interacting because you're kind of meeting that person's agent.
00:15:04
Speaker
You're meeting the best version of themselves.
00:15:07
Speaker
And that's not necessarily inauthentic.
00:15:10
Speaker
It's like we're just – I'm trying to like, you know, I've got my stuff.
00:15:13
Speaker
We all have our stuff.
00:15:14
Speaker
I don't necessarily need to bring my stuff to the table.
00:15:17
Speaker
on date number two or date number three is like, well, okay, if this is, you know, if this is meant to be, if this is going to unfold, we're going to get there.
00:15:24
Speaker
I'm going to, I'm going to learn about their, their stuff.
00:15:26
Speaker
They're going to learn about mine.
00:15:27
Speaker
We don't necessarily have to unpack all that right away.
00:15:30
Speaker
Although some people like to do that as well.
00:15:33
Speaker
Like on that very first day, okay, here's, here I am, here's my stuff.
00:15:36
Speaker
And that whole, like, you know, saying like, if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best.
00:15:41
Speaker
It's like, well, okay.
00:15:43
Speaker
Whether or not we bring our worst to the table, like right away,
00:15:46
Speaker
as an individual choice.
00:15:49
Speaker
But I don't necessarily feel it's inauthentic to kind of like wait a while to unpack, to unpack the fullness of who we are.
00:15:58
Speaker
Yeah, I think that that's and I think that even those decisions and those choices are help determine if it's a good match.
00:16:06
Speaker
I mean, there are some people who are so craving realness and so craving.
00:16:12
Speaker
I mean, I think anyone that would date me is going to know pretty darn quickly.
00:16:18
Speaker
warts and all it's just not i just don't tend to have a best facade forward uh that i that so you know if we hang out for a few hours i'm going to feel more comfortable if i've showed my underbelly a little bit and if there's if if the other person is is that scary to them or it's like i really need to be oh i want to feel more comfortable seeing your best first and that
00:16:44
Speaker
I feel like it's, it's a, it's the dating is effective in that way.
00:16:48
Speaker
And it has showed that we are probably not in the right place to be, to getting too much deeper.
00:16:53
Speaker
Intention is powerful, super powerful.
00:16:56
Speaker
You know, I, I feel like, you know, here we are talking about dating and exploring, um, and also like the elements of romance and where that plays a part in all of this, you know, um,
00:17:09
Speaker
Personally, I feel like there's not a whole lot of information out there on romance.
Creative Romantic Gestures
00:17:17
Speaker
I know I have gotten stumped at times when I'm in a relationship and I want to do something romantic for my partner to make them feel special and get creative and do little surprises.
00:17:29
Speaker
And I actually...
00:17:32
Speaker
I was encouraging one of the amazing men that I dated for quite some time to write a book on romantic ideas because it is, you know, takes a lot of creativity to do something that is coming from that authentic heart, that is coming from a place of creativity, that is to honor your partner, to honor the person that you're dating, to make them feel really special.
00:17:54
Speaker
Because isn't that what romance is about?
00:17:57
Speaker
You know, we want to make the person that we're attracted to or that we care about, that we love, feel really special.
00:18:03
Speaker
Right.
00:18:04
Speaker
So how do we do that?
00:18:06
Speaker
I think that my basic guideline for that is to practice genuine presence, either in their presence or away from them.
00:18:17
Speaker
And then it's some expression.
00:18:18
Speaker
So if it doesn't have to be grand, I don't have to, you know, create some massive piece of art, but even as you said, like writing a note,
00:18:26
Speaker
before I see them and then leaving that in, you know, in their purse, like if it's they they knew that at one point I was thinking about them
00:18:38
Speaker
that's a super romantic gesture.
00:18:40
Speaker
You know, in the same time, if I'm in their presence and I pause whatever we're doing, look in their eyes and say something that is an observation or a sharing of some deep, truthful, authentic appreciation of that person, that's super romantic.
00:18:55
Speaker
You know, it doesn't take that much, but just to stop the world and them be the focus for a moment.
00:19:03
Speaker
And then however that looks is how to do our personal creativity.
00:19:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:19:10
Speaker
And I feel, you know, the idea that, you know, presence is romantic.
00:19:15
Speaker
I wholeheartedly agree with that.
00:19:18
Speaker
And I find that listening and then kind of like paying attention during that initial like conversation or even that initial meetup, like, okay, let's say, let's say you guys meet cute at the, at the book, at the bookshop.
00:19:30
Speaker
And then you set a date for coffee or whatever.
00:19:34
Speaker
You could then, if you were paying attention, you might notice what book she had in her hand or what section she was in and be like, hey, so there's this book that I like.
00:19:44
Speaker
Or even if it's not, it's something that she was expressing interest in, something that you like, that has value to you.
00:19:54
Speaker
And that doesn't have to be some big grand gesture, but it's like, hey, there's this thing that I like.
00:19:58
Speaker
thought you might like that as well.
00:20:00
Speaker
But then also paying attention to, you know, in those first meetings, you can kind of get a hint on, I don't want to like break the drum too much on like the five love languages, but you can get a pretty good idea what love language somebody's speaking or what resonates with them during those, even that initial meeting, if not the following conversation, pay attention to that because there's some people that are like,
00:20:23
Speaker
not that keen on receiving gifts at all.
00:20:27
Speaker
And sometimes even especially early in a relationship, you know, they run the risk of love bombing somebody.
00:20:32
Speaker
So, so it doesn't have to be like, you have to drop stuff on them, but you just like something that shows that you have been paying attention and gestures.
00:20:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:42
Speaker
Whether it's like a, like a note is fine or like suggesting a certain, you
00:20:48
Speaker
you know follow for the following date because they like they don't like coffee but they like chai they like tea it's like hey let's go let's go get some tea and i don't know so yeah paying attention is is super sexy and super romantic
00:20:59
Speaker
Totally.
00:21:00
Speaker
You actually sparked a romantic idea that I have shared in different situations.
00:21:06
Speaker
It's a really good one for, um, for a date.
00:21:10
Speaker
So you set up your date to meet at the bookstore and the intention is to, um, you know, you,
00:21:18
Speaker
connect and then you take 10 minutes or so, five or 10 minutes on your own and go find your top five books in different sections, right?
00:21:28
Speaker
Whether you've read them or you want to read them or just what are the five books that really are drawing you?
00:21:33
Speaker
And then you go meet somewhere and sit at like one of the chairs or a little cozy spot and share with each other why you chose these certain books.
00:21:40
Speaker
And it's a really cool way to get to know somebody.
00:21:43
Speaker
It's really fun way to get to just...
00:21:46
Speaker
put a little play in a date.
00:21:49
Speaker
And then also, it kind of sparked this other consideration around the gestures, right?
00:21:56
Speaker
It's like love bombing versus just like a gesture, right?
00:21:59
Speaker
It's like, do you bring a dozen roses to somebody or do you bring one?
00:22:02
Speaker
Yeah.
00:22:04
Speaker
I went out with this guy one time and it was actually quite confusing because I couldn't quite tell if he was asking me out on a date or if it was just a walk or we were just friends because we were just friends.
00:22:15
Speaker
But then he asked me to go to the beach and have dinner.
00:22:17
Speaker
And I was like, I kind of think this is a date.
00:22:20
Speaker
I'm not sure.
00:22:22
Speaker
And then when I get there, you know, he's dressed a little bit nicer than normal.
00:22:26
Speaker
So then I'm like, oh, maybe this is something that I don't know.
00:22:30
Speaker
And then he has a rose in his hand.
00:22:32
Speaker
And he's like, I found this on the ground on the way when I walked over here.
00:22:36
Speaker
Here.
00:22:38
Speaker
Oh, okay.
00:22:38
Speaker
Hmm.
00:22:41
Speaker
I'm still a little bit confused.
00:22:43
Speaker
You found it on the ground.
00:22:44
Speaker
You're giving it to me.
00:22:45
Speaker
Does this mean you like me?
00:22:47
Speaker
I'm not quite sure what these messages are.
Listening and Responding in Relationships
00:22:50
Speaker
So I feel like there is something really important as a woman to have clear gestures, you know, not to love bomb, but clear gesture, you know, like the difference between saying...
00:23:02
Speaker
Hey, we should, we should hang out sometime versus, Hey, I would really love to take you on a date sometime.
00:23:08
Speaker
Bam.
00:23:09
Speaker
That's the part of the old me.
00:23:10
Speaker
I wish I had gotten that, you know, you mentioned the, the, the five books.
00:23:16
Speaker
I absolutely love that idea.
00:23:17
Speaker
And I want to just another similar one that I've done with success is go to a grocery store, to a store and say, let's each go get five things that we want to feed to each other.
00:23:29
Speaker
And then check out separately or go to a 99 cent store and say, let's go get five 99 cent things that have textures that we're going to rub on each other's body.
00:23:39
Speaker
I don't know if I would do that at the 99 cent store.
00:23:42
Speaker
Don't knock until you try it.
00:23:44
Speaker
More like luxury fabrics and oils and delicious things like that.
00:23:49
Speaker
You would be surprised that you could find a 99 cent store.
00:23:52
Speaker
Oh, you can get those little 99 cent like feather dusters kind of thing.
00:23:56
Speaker
Yeah, a little scratchy.
00:23:57
Speaker
It's got to be, you know, look.
00:23:59
Speaker
Okay, Betsy, I think it's a date.
00:24:01
Speaker
Betsy, I think you had a date.
00:24:02
Speaker
Okay, yeah, totally.
00:24:03
Speaker
All right.
00:24:04
Speaker
I have a...
00:24:05
Speaker
I would say about the gestures is like when you mentioned, is it a dozen or one flower?
00:24:10
Speaker
Ideally, you listen and you know there's a certain flower they like, you know, or a certain thing.
00:24:17
Speaker
Like I had recently on a date, a woman asked if I had a tea light for something and I did not.
00:24:25
Speaker
And so next time I saw her, that was, I gave her a gift of a single tea light.
00:24:29
Speaker
And she thought it was quite romantic and charming that I had paid attention, you know, that I was listening.
00:24:34
Speaker
And so I think that that gift was way more romantic than it does in Rote Roses because I was trying to, you know, join her in her offering.
00:24:45
Speaker
Yeah.
00:24:46
Speaker
Yes.
00:24:46
Speaker
Yeah.
00:24:47
Speaker
That actually sparked something for me too around some gifts that I've received.
00:24:51
Speaker
So I was dating this guy a while back and, you know, it came around the time of a holiday and we were going to do gifts and we're still getting to know each other.
00:25:02
Speaker
And he gave me this gift that he said he went to like six different stores to pick out.
00:25:08
Speaker
It was this whole thing.
00:25:09
Speaker
He didn't know what to get me.
00:25:11
Speaker
It took him hours to figure out what to get me.
00:25:13
Speaker
He got me this necklace.
00:25:15
Speaker
He gave me the necklace.
00:25:16
Speaker
It was very sweet.
00:25:18
Speaker
I didn't actually like the necklace, unfortunately.
00:25:21
Speaker
I didn't say anything right away.
00:25:22
Speaker
I was just like, oh, that's just so sweet.
00:25:24
Speaker
It's a really beautiful gesture.
00:25:25
Speaker
It actually didn't feel good.
00:25:27
Speaker
It was like hard.
00:25:27
Speaker
And I just, I didn't say anything.
00:25:30
Speaker
But I received it.
00:25:32
Speaker
And then like a little bit later, he's like, oh, I also got you something else that I, that I just felt more inspired.
00:25:39
Speaker
I, I gathered this pile of sticks and I wrapped them up and made it look really cool.
00:25:43
Speaker
Like this thing.
00:25:44
Speaker
And I was like, oh my God, I love sticks.
00:25:48
Speaker
You know how much I love sticks.
00:25:50
Speaker
You know?
00:25:51
Speaker
Cause he was paying attention when we had gone on a hike before I was like, wow, look at that stick.
00:25:55
Speaker
Oh my gosh, look at this one.
00:25:56
Speaker
And I made a bouquet of sticks just on our hike and he paid attention to that, you know, and it was really a beautiful gesture.
00:26:04
Speaker
And it was, um, I waited about a week and was like, you know, I thought about the necklace.
00:26:08
Speaker
I really appreciate it so much.
00:26:10
Speaker
And, you know, I want to actually let you know, I probably won't wear it.
00:26:13
Speaker
And it worked out perfect cause he was able to go exchange it.
00:26:16
Speaker
And, and now I have the sticks hanging in my house.
00:26:19
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:21
Speaker
that's so cool the paying attention and noticing and like you know if it's if it's coming from that place of ease and inspiration then it's usually going to work out if it's coming from like muscling it's hard it's trying to figure something out then it's like maybe just relax a little yeah you also touched on something i think is a critical part of of the romantic process which is that you were honest
00:26:45
Speaker
with him.
00:26:46
Speaker
I mean, if your relationship continued, you could have a whole closet full of similar jewelry because he thought that he gave you something that you liked, you know, but by being honest, he gets to actually know what you really like and who you really are.
00:27:00
Speaker
And then you can build off that instead of continuing this, this facade for, you know, indefinitely.
00:27:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:27:08
Speaker
So do we, do we think that most men appreciate honesty from a woman?
00:27:15
Speaker
all in this regard.
00:27:17
Speaker
Now, maybe this is a whole separate topic.
00:27:20
Speaker
But I think any man worth...
00:27:24
Speaker
Frank worth being with has got that piece worked out for himself.
00:27:28
Speaker
That it's like, okay, so I do something for somebody and they don't appreciate it or they, that doesn't resonate with them.
00:27:34
Speaker
I would like to know about it and I'm not going to get caught up in that.
00:27:37
Speaker
And any, you know, so I think every man, every boy needs to get themselves to this place where they just don't take this stuff.
00:27:43
Speaker
So personally, even though it is directly like, I do not like this gift that you gave me.
00:27:48
Speaker
Don't process it that way.
00:27:49
Speaker
It's like, Oh, okay.
00:27:50
Speaker
So yeah,
00:27:51
Speaker
She let you know, you should be thankful that somebody cared enough to be honest with you.
00:27:56
Speaker
So I, and this is, this is without, this goes beyond gender.
00:27:59
Speaker
Um, certainly.
00:28:00
Speaker
So, um, yeah, on it.
00:28:02
Speaker
Yeah.
00:28:03
Speaker
We should be definitely.
00:28:04
Speaker
I can definitely speak to that because I've learned a lot on that.
00:28:07
Speaker
And I, one of the things I have found is that there's a grace that comes when giving feedback, especially when we're talking about like a gesture of generosity or a gift, right?
00:28:18
Speaker
Because I've been burned where, you know, I've been given a very special gift.
00:28:22
Speaker
It was very thought thought out, but I didn't really like it.
00:28:25
Speaker
And I said,
00:28:27
Speaker
Oh, thank you.
00:28:28
Speaker
And oh, I don't, you know, and I said, right, almost right away that it wasn't something that I would like or wear.
00:28:33
Speaker
And it came off as hurtful to the person, you know, it was hard for him to receive that.
00:28:39
Speaker
And so I learned actually to just pause and just, just receive the gesture for what it is in gratitude, even though I might not like the physical thing in the moment, just like breathe with it, recognize it as a gift that's coming my way and then allow that person to give that gift.
00:28:56
Speaker
Right.
00:28:57
Speaker
And then wait.
00:28:58
Speaker
So this is what I did with the necklace.
00:29:00
Speaker
I was like, oh my gosh, that's so thoughtful that you went to all these places to pick something out.
00:29:04
Speaker
You were thinking of me.
00:29:05
Speaker
I received that.
00:29:06
Speaker
So grateful that you were considering me in all these ways.
00:29:09
Speaker
Thank you.
00:29:10
Speaker
I waited a week.
00:29:13
Speaker
And then I made sure that the setting that our conversation was, it was good.
00:29:18
Speaker
It wasn't like we both retired or hungry or rushing or anything.
00:29:23
Speaker
waited for the moment and was like, Hey, you know what?
00:29:25
Speaker
I wanted to let you know, um, I had put this necklace on a couple of times this week and I just felt all the love that you, you know, put into it.
00:29:34
Speaker
But I also wanted to let, you know, I don't, I don't think it's actually gonna be something I'll wear.
00:29:39
Speaker
And he was able to hear me so much more gracefully and kindly.
00:29:43
Speaker
And it didn't like, it wasn't sharp.
00:29:44
Speaker
Whereas if he would have given it to me in that, you know, in that moment, I would have said, Oh, that's nice.
00:29:49
Speaker
I, yeah, that's not really my style.
00:29:51
Speaker
We're like, oh, crush, you know, all that time and energy that I put into getting you something, you know, so there's there's definitely something as the receiver, whether you're a man or a woman, to be mindful around how we deliver that kind of honest feedback.
00:30:07
Speaker
I think that's a really key component.
00:30:09
Speaker
That is a key component for sure.
00:30:11
Speaker
Very astute.
00:30:12
Speaker
That was like a masterclass you just gave Betsy.
00:30:14
Speaker
That was fucking awesome.
00:30:15
Speaker
Yeah.
00:30:16
Speaker
Cause it is delicate.
00:30:17
Speaker
And cause what you're saying is like, I absolutely appreciate you giving me this gift and point.
00:30:25
Speaker
Now the next point is,
00:30:27
Speaker
In the future, it's not a gift that is going to be something that, you know, is that I'm going to use that much.
00:30:33
Speaker
It doesn't change the fact of my appreciation.
00:30:35
Speaker
And but but but if you put those two close together, it it does not work.
00:30:42
Speaker
Yeah, because because they are two different processes.
00:30:44
Speaker
So it's very important.
00:30:46
Speaker
It's very important to to separate the two.
00:30:48
Speaker
So well done, Betsy.
00:30:49
Speaker
Thank you.
00:30:49
Speaker
And it goes back to just being aware of the person that you're spending this time with, you know, being sensitive to who they are, how they are, how they operate, because maybe it is somebody that is like not as sensitive, like, and you can be a little bit more direct, you know, maybe it's someone you've been with for a really long time.
00:31:06
Speaker
And so it does take that, that subtle awareness of how that person might receive it, you know, and
00:31:14
Speaker
So we've been, we've been discussing, you know, romance, like in the, in the initial like meetings with somebody or in the, in the,
00:31:23
Speaker
The early stages.
00:31:24
Speaker
So what do we have to say about romance in the later stages?
00:31:30
Speaker
Like, is that something that we should pay attention?
00:31:33
Speaker
How do we pay attention to it to keep that going?
00:31:37
Speaker
And obviously I think, yeah, it's important, but you know, yeah.
00:31:41
Speaker
How, how important is it?
00:31:43
Speaker
And it's you know, what do we do to, to kind of keep that, keep that flowing?
00:31:47
Speaker
So yeah.
00:31:48
Speaker
I feel like it's so
The Value of Date Nights
00:31:50
Speaker
important.
00:31:50
Speaker
I feel like it is fuel for longevity and partnership, you know, to create special moments, to make your partner feel special, to, you know, create that sacred time together.
00:32:02
Speaker
I lived with a couple for about seven years there.
00:32:05
Speaker
They've been together for, I think almost 14 years now as I was actually in their wedding, very up close and personal with these dear friends.
00:32:13
Speaker
And I really hold their love very high because they prioritize their date nights.
00:32:19
Speaker
They really are very busy people, but their date night is essential.
00:32:24
Speaker
And they even have a kid, you know, and they make sure to always come back to that special time and they have their rituals and they do different things for each other and they
00:32:34
Speaker
make time to massage each other and they, you know, do these very special things to make love and to just nurture the romance and their long-term partnership.
00:32:46
Speaker
And I see just how valuable that is to their, their, their connection and
00:32:53
Speaker
Because they, of course, just like anyone, they have their fiery moments and there's challenges and they go to counseling and stuff like that.
00:32:59
Speaker
But I feel like that date night and that commitment to the romance is absolutely an essential ingredient to them being together now.
00:33:10
Speaker
It goes back to the presence.
00:33:12
Speaker
I think that it's the trap that I've fallen into is, you know, in a relationship for a while, you're living together and you're together all the time.
00:33:20
Speaker
And so, you know, maybe one partner is like, you know, we don't do anything together.
00:33:23
Speaker
And you're like, we do everything together, you know, but,
00:33:26
Speaker
But it's different to set a container where in that container you're fully present to the relationship and to that other person.
00:33:34
Speaker
And whether it's date night, whether a friend who gave a gift to their wife that I will give you a five-minute massage at the end of every day.
00:33:46
Speaker
And she has to ask for it, but I'm like, holy moly, that is awesome.
00:33:54
Speaker
But there is that presence thing.
00:33:57
Speaker
If you show the person that in this moment, you are everything, that is going to be romantic, however it looks.
00:34:05
Speaker
Yeah, turn your phone off.
00:34:06
Speaker
Right?
00:34:07
Speaker
Like, hey, guess what?
00:34:08
Speaker
We're going to have a date night.
00:34:09
Speaker
And that means we both leave our phones in the other room.
00:34:11
Speaker
And it's just only about you and me.
00:34:14
Speaker
Here's a really great thing that couples can do that I learned from this really great community called Eden.
00:34:20
Speaker
Rano and Sierra started it.
00:34:23
Speaker
They support couples globally to be able to keep their romance alive and a lot of other things for couples.
00:34:30
Speaker
But one of the things that they teach is this five minutes of anything.
00:34:34
Speaker
And so you set the container, you put your phones away, you know that you're going to be just together for a certain amount of time and you each get a chance to ask for five minutes of anything.
00:34:44
Speaker
And so if I were to go, then I could ask, you know, I'd love five minutes of a foot massage, you know, or if he's asked, you know, I would like five minutes of eye gazing or five minutes of wrestling or whatever.
00:35:00
Speaker
maybe some other little playful, naughty things, you know, just really depending on what you each need.
00:35:05
Speaker
So yeah, it's interesting.
00:35:07
Speaker
I'm familiar with the Eden group that she mentioned.
00:35:10
Speaker
Yeah, they're really big on the romance tip.
00:35:13
Speaker
So yeah, they got some good tips.
00:35:15
Speaker
So interesting in that my current relationship, I'm with somebody who we've been friends for like, we were friends for about 10 years before we got into
00:35:27
Speaker
a romance, a romantic relationship.
00:35:30
Speaker
And it's been great.
00:35:32
Speaker
And, but it's also been very easy for us to kind of fall into, I think it probably, probably fell into the routine and maybe a little bit faster than we might have if we like had met and gotten romantic right away, as opposed to connecting with somebody who, you know,
00:35:50
Speaker
Like we know each other like very well.
00:35:52
Speaker
We're friends.
00:35:52
Speaker
And so we fell into, you know, the day to day routine of living together and handling things.
00:35:57
Speaker
So romance definitely kind of slipped a little bit.
00:36:04
Speaker
At least I'll speak for myself.
00:36:05
Speaker
It kind of it kind of fell by the wayside for me to to express things romantically to her.
00:36:12
Speaker
But I feel like we're also spending some time to get that, spending some time to get back to that and kind of being there for it.
00:36:20
Speaker
Because like Betsy says, it is important.
00:36:22
Speaker
It is important at all stages of a relationship.
00:36:24
Speaker
And it's easy.
00:36:25
Speaker
It's one of the first things I think of that once we kind of settle into a groove, it's one of those things that's super easy to let fall by the wayside.
00:36:33
Speaker
So those things of authenticity and paying attention and listening are crucial throughout the relationship.
00:36:42
Speaker
And that's true, you know, true for all our relationships, friendships, family, relationships, but particularly with romance.
00:36:47
Speaker
We definitely are well served to pay attention.
00:36:51
Speaker
Mm hmm.
00:36:53
Speaker
That's the little things to, you know, like opening the door for your beloved.
00:36:59
Speaker
male or female.
00:37:01
Speaker
You know, I always feel really special when somebody I'm with opens my door, you know, in the car or restaurant or whatever it is.
00:37:09
Speaker
It's a chivalry that those little, little tiny gestures that make up make a really big difference.
Gifts and Small Gestures
00:37:16
Speaker
it comes back to to make it about burning man again gifting you know like when when you can when you get joy from someone else's joy you know you give somebody something and they feel good plus one you feel good seeing them enjoying it plus one and so little bitty things that um when you're keeping your head on a swivel looking for is there a little way i can make their moment better opening the door there's a little way i can make their day better
00:37:42
Speaker
I'll get the coffee going.
00:37:43
Speaker
Is there a little bit of way I can make the day better?
00:37:45
Speaker
I will.
00:37:45
Speaker
I know that, you know, we're running late.
00:37:46
Speaker
I'm going to make the reservation.
00:37:48
Speaker
You know, this little bitty things that are not overt gifts, but it is gifting.
00:37:53
Speaker
It's just trying to, to see that the joy that you get from, from enhancing the other's experience.
00:38:00
Speaker
Yeah.
00:38:01
Speaker
And it's easy to make somebody feel like loved and appreciated and kind of get them going like, oh, you know, that little tinge of romance is not hard.
00:38:12
Speaker
Like Bessie's saying, it's like I've long...
00:38:16
Speaker
been a person who like opens the door and walks on this, you know, the street side of the sidewalk.
00:38:21
Speaker
And these little things that don't see, that seem kind of inconsequential are really not.
00:38:26
Speaker
It just kind of shows that you actually are caring about this person.
00:38:30
Speaker
And I remember the first time I got flowers from a woman.
00:38:34
Speaker
Which still, I mean, I think, you know, I think it probably has probably happened.
00:38:37
Speaker
A number of times I've gotten flowers from a woman, I can probably count on one hand.
00:38:41
Speaker
It's just not something that happens.
00:38:44
Speaker
But because I think I think women don't think that men would appreciate that.
00:38:47
Speaker
But every time I've been blown away, it's like, oh, my God.
00:38:50
Speaker
Wow.
00:38:51
Speaker
Thank you.
00:38:51
Speaker
It's nothing.
00:38:51
Speaker
This has to be some fancy bouquet.
00:38:53
Speaker
It's just the simple fact that somebody is giving me flowers.
00:38:56
Speaker
Oh, I like that.
00:38:58
Speaker
So, yeah.
00:38:59
Speaker
So yeah, it's like, it doesn't, so it goes, yeah, flows both ways.
00:39:03
Speaker
Those like, those really small gestures are not so small.
00:39:06
Speaker
They definitely, they definitely add up and, you know, and it kind of goes back to the same, like, you know, people may not remember what you did for them, but they always remember how you made them feel.
00:39:16
Speaker
So, so if somebody is giving me these good feelings, I'm inclined to give them those same feelings or try to at least.
00:39:26
Speaker
Yeah, so beautiful.
00:39:28
Speaker
The heart speaks in flowers.
00:39:31
Speaker
That's well said.
Modern Romance and Technology
00:39:33
Speaker
Yeah, well, I love this conversation and probably could keep going, but let's find some closing sparks on modern romance.
00:39:43
Speaker
What do you guys, what do you guys got?
00:39:45
Speaker
What are your closing sparks?
00:39:47
Speaker
I'm just, you know, it is a, it is an odd time when we have so much technology and awareness that has kind of infiltrated this age old process of, you know, connecting with a fellow human and with, with swiping and with profiles and with even, I mean, those are the kind of the scary parts.
00:40:06
Speaker
And there's this positive parts where we have the, uh,
00:40:10
Speaker
there's so much more information about trauma and about love languages and there's you can really deeply with someone who is willing to do work with you you can very quickly really get to know somebody and and work through the things i think that just you know 10 years ago could have been big obstacles um so there's there's it's such a different field of connecting but at the end of the day
00:40:33
Speaker
it comes back to what we keep coming to, which is being present, you know, and, and being vulnerable and present with another human being that is living in romance.
00:40:42
Speaker
And, um, I'm going to be practicing that as much as possible.
00:40:47
Speaker
Beautiful.
00:40:50
Speaker
Yeah.
00:40:50
Speaker
Yeah.
00:40:51
Speaker
I feel like, yeah, I'll send you really kind of summed it up something pretty well.
00:40:55
Speaker
So it's, uh, there's, there's a lot of,
00:40:59
Speaker
Yeah, it's tricky.
00:41:00
Speaker
It can be tricky these days just with so many draws for our attention.
00:41:04
Speaker
You have to actually kind of commit to being romantic and trying to keep that romance in life.
00:41:14
Speaker
It's one of the first things.
00:41:15
Speaker
It's such an easy thing to really drop out of our connection with people.
00:41:19
Speaker
But it's value.
00:41:21
Speaker
It has a lot of value to it.
00:41:23
Speaker
And showing up for somebody...
00:41:26
Speaker
it's, I like to, I like to think that I do it not because of who they are, but because of who I am, because that's how I want to show up in the world.
00:41:37
Speaker
I had to, I want to show up for this person.
00:41:39
Speaker
So it's not a matter of deserving or that you're trying to get something out of it.
00:41:43
Speaker
It's just because it makes, because ultimately it makes me feel good.
00:41:47
Speaker
It makes me feel good to know I'm showing up for my partner or even like just a regular date on, um,
00:41:53
Speaker
Showing up in ways that I would consider to be romantic, regardless of how it's received or appreciated.
00:42:00
Speaker
It's a true gift.
00:42:02
Speaker
Romance should be a true gift.
00:42:03
Speaker
So a gift is something that you give with zero expectation of what comes out of that or what comes from that.
00:42:10
Speaker
So yeah, so treat romance as a gift and everybody's going to be happy.
00:42:15
Speaker
I love that so much.
00:42:16
Speaker
My heart is fluttering.
00:42:18
Speaker
You know, I'll close it up with something we didn't touch too much on, but romancing self.
The Importance of Self-Romance
00:42:25
Speaker
You know, I have found a lot of joy in a practice of taking myself out on dates.
00:42:31
Speaker
and doing things for myself to really like just love on me, right?
00:42:37
Speaker
There is something so sweet that I've found in that, whether that's getting myself some flowers or that's like lighting some candles and making like a romantic environment or like, you know, sometimes I'll even take myself out and get a glass of wine, which I don't usually drink very much, but like something about having a glass of wine at dinner by myself, it's just like, I can just sit there with myself and just,
00:43:01
Speaker
romance myself and it's kind of you know it's kind of awkward at first when i first uh started doing that i don't do it all the time but the times that i have it's been really sweet and really like just filling in my heart and um so i think that there is something
00:43:18
Speaker
magical about romancing ourselves as well.
00:43:21
Speaker
You know, and then we can show up to the, whether it's our, our partnership or the dating world, um, from that place of knowing I'm already whole, I feel full within myself and I can give from that place of overflow.
00:43:33
Speaker
Nice.
00:43:36
Speaker
Yeah.
00:43:37
Speaker
Nice.
00:43:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:43:39
Speaker
Amazing.
00:43:39
Speaker
Well, I am just in, in love with you guys.
00:43:42
Speaker
I'm in love with this process.
00:43:44
Speaker
My heart is so full.
Connect with the Hosts
00:43:45
Speaker
I love having these conversations with you guys.
00:43:47
Speaker
Thank you everyone out there for listening and would love for you guys to, um, find us more out in the world.
00:43:54
Speaker
So we all share in different ways that we shared a little in the beginning, but maybe a little more insight into where to find you guys.
00:44:02
Speaker
So that way you guys can just stay up to date.
00:44:06
Speaker
Well, I am easily found on the internet at johnstyn.com, J-O-H-N-S-T-Y-N.com.
00:44:13
Speaker
And that's got my t-shirt store, a free sticker offer, information on my coaching and my YouTube channel.
00:44:20
Speaker
And oh boy, lots of goodies.
00:44:22
Speaker
You should really visit johnstyn.com.
00:44:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:44:26
Speaker
Interwebs.
00:44:27
Speaker
And also on your love mornings.
00:44:29
Speaker
Yes.
00:44:30
Speaker
There's a link to my, I have a 9am, a noon and a 6pm live every day.
00:44:35
Speaker
So I'd love to see your face.
00:44:37
Speaker
Great.
00:44:38
Speaker
Great.
00:44:38
Speaker
So, uh, yeah, as mentioned, I've got a nutritional supplement company called new world nutritionals spelled N U world nutritionals.com.
00:44:48
Speaker
And we have, uh, some mushroom based products that are designed to improve your state of mind or, um, they help alleviate symptoms of
00:44:57
Speaker
let's say anxiety, depression, ADHD, even PTSD in some cases.
00:45:03
Speaker
There's some people getting really good results with dealing with neurological ailments, dementia, Parkinson's, things like that.
00:45:09
Speaker
So yeah, it's a good product doing some good work in the world.
00:45:14
Speaker
Happy to be sharing that with you.
00:45:16
Speaker
So check it out.
00:45:17
Speaker
And if you are interested, you can use the code SPARKED to get 10% off of our products.
00:45:23
Speaker
Boom.
00:45:24
Speaker
I love it.
00:45:26
Speaker
And you guys can find me on all the socials, of course, Instagram, Betsy Who, and follow me on one of my other favorite social apps is Insight Timer.
00:45:35
Speaker
It's a meditation app.
00:45:37
Speaker
I have lots of audio affirmations on there to promote self-love and inner empowerment.
00:45:42
Speaker
So check that out.
00:45:44
Speaker
Also, my project PowerAffirmation.com has a journal that helps you fall in love with yourself, helps you reprogram limiting beliefs about yourself.
00:45:53
Speaker
There's also virtual programs that I run and do empowerment calls.
00:45:59
Speaker
And I also work with people one-on-one doing retreats and body work, healing work, energy work.
00:46:04
Speaker
I just am here in service to raise the vibration, more light, more love, more joy, more positivity.
00:46:12
Speaker
And so, yeah, you guys can find me on my website.
00:46:15
Speaker
And of course, Sparked is the discount code.
00:46:18
Speaker
And we got a free gift for you guys as well in the show notes.
00:46:22
Speaker
So thank you guys so much for following us, for sending us messages.
00:46:26
Speaker
We love hearing from you.
00:46:28
Speaker
If you've been enjoying these, please do reach out.
00:46:30
Speaker
We're also open to receiving some requests on topics.
00:46:35
Speaker
We love getting to have these conversations.
00:46:38
Speaker
And if there's certain things that you want to hear us talk about, let us know.
00:46:40
Speaker
Indeed.
00:46:42
Speaker
Indeed.
00:46:43
Speaker
So Betsy, can you close this out with a affirmation to send us on our way?
00:46:50
Speaker
My pleasure.
00:46:51
Speaker
Yes.
00:46:52
Speaker
Close it out with an affirmation.
00:46:54
Speaker
So let's tune in.
00:46:55
Speaker
What is that affirmation for us today?
00:46:59
Speaker
So closing the eyes, if that's available too, taking a nice deep breath and maybe putting a hand on the heart.
00:47:11
Speaker
I love being me and I love sharing my love with others.
00:47:17
Speaker
I love being me and I love sharing my love with others.
00:47:22
Speaker
I love being me and I love sharing my love with others.
00:47:26
Speaker
I find creative and authentic ways to express my love.
00:47:31
Speaker
I find creative and authentic ways to express my love.
00:47:36
Speaker
I am authentic and creative in the ways I express my love.
00:47:41
Speaker
I love finding new ways to express my love.
00:47:43
Speaker
I love finding new ways to express my love.
00:47:46
Speaker
I love finding new ways to express my love.
00:47:51
Speaker
Let those words just be reminders that it is a beautiful and fun way to be able to light the people up in our lives with creativity and authenticity and lighting our own self up.
00:48:04
Speaker
I love you guys.
00:48:04
Speaker
Thank you for listening.
00:48:07
Speaker
Love you too, B. Stay as part, people.