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153. Ashton Lunt on Resilience, Recovery & Why You’re More Than Your Sport
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In this powerful episode of the Especially for Athletes podcast, we sit down with NCAA National Champion Ashton Lunt (formerly Ashton Riner), whose journey from small-town athlete to BYU record-holder is as inspiring as it is instructive.
Ashton opens up about winning the 2022 national title in the javelin, the intense pressure she felt as a top-ranked athlete, and the deep personal battles she faced—especially her experience overcoming an eating disorder. She shares how routines like intentional journaling, focused time management, and affirmations helped her build confidence, recover from injury, and rediscover her fire after setbacks.
Ashton also reflects on identity, motherhood, and using her spotlight to bless others. Her message to young athletes is both honest and hopeful: your worth is not defined by your performance, and you are never alone in your struggles.
Highlight Moment:
“I went from not even making nationals to winning a national championship within a year. And I just put my head down and worked—journaled every day, focused on my cues, and reminded myself: I am Ashton freakin’ Riner.”
Listen if you want to learn:
• What it really feels like to win a national title
• How to “win the hour” and manage high-level performance with real life
• The warning signs and recovery steps for eating disorders in athletes
• Why being intentional with your spotlight can help others heal
Connect with Ashton’s journey and more E4A stories at e4a.org
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Especially for Athletes:
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Join the conversation using #TheSportlightPodcast
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Credits: Hosted by Shad Martin
Produced by Shad Martin and IMAGINATE STUDIO
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Especially for Athletes
00:00:01
Speaker
Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast, where we explore essential principles that empower athletes to learn life's most valuable lessons through sports.
Meet Ashton Lunt, NCAA Champion
00:00:16
Speaker
Hello everybody, today on the Especially for Athletes podcast, we are honored to be joined by someone whose story embodies resilience, focus, and the power of going all in We have Ashton Lunt, formerly Ashton Reiner,
00:00:33
Speaker
And Ashton is the 2022 NCAA national champion in the javelin. And she did that at Brigham Young University and was the first in BYU history to earn that title. She grew she grew up in Connell, Washington.
Journey of Resilience and Determination
00:00:51
Speaker
and started throwing the javelin as a young girl under her dad's coaching. From her early success in high school to overcoming ah major elbow injury in college, Ashton's path has been defined by determination, resilience, and relentless drive to keep improving.
00:01:09
Speaker
What makes Ashton's story so compelling isn't just her national title, it's the mindset behind it. She knows what it takes to push through setbacks, stay focused on long-term goals, and find new motivation when things don't go as planned.
00:01:24
Speaker
Whether she's training, competing, or mentoring others, Ashton brings in energy and perspective. that inspires those around her. And we're so excited to have her on our podcast today to talk about her journey, the lessons she's learned. And Ashton, thank you. We are so excited to learn from you today. Thanks for being on the podcast today.
00:01:46
Speaker
Thanks for having me. I'm excited. Yeah, well... So this, we've had a few national champions on our podcast, but not, not many. And so that's awesome. It's an honor to have you on.
Winning a National Championship: Relief and Pressure
00:02:00
Speaker
What was that like? Maybe start us off there. What was it like to win a national championship in college? I get asked this question a lot and I i never know how to kind of like respond to it. And I, I always say it felt like ah huge weight just kind of lifted off my shoulders. Like,
00:02:18
Speaker
I did it. Like I accomplished something huge. And then were like, but like, like, was it cool? Was it awesome? I'm like, it really was just like a weight, like lifted off my shoulders immediately.
00:02:30
Speaker
It was awesome. Yeah, so when you must have gone in then, ranked pretty highly with some expectations that that might be the case if you felt the weight come off. Yes.
00:02:42
Speaker
So maybe like the men's basketball team feels going into this but yes basketball year at BYU. Yes, very much. Like a lot of expectations. Yes. So... That's interesting. Yeah. All of us think it's this like beautiful, like celebratory moment and you're feeling like, oh, pressure. Yeah. You would think like people are like, oh my gosh, like were you just on a high afterwards? Yes. But like in the moment when I was in the stadium, it was just like, oh my gosh, like I could faint because of how much weight was on my shoulders.
00:03:13
Speaker
But after that, I didn't sleep all night. Like I had a ah breakfast with the AD, all the coaches, my parents, everyone. And I didn't sleep. i I stayed up until like nine o'clock and they're like, did you sleep good? I said, I haven't went to bed.
00:03:27
Speaker
So it was it was awesome. It was awesome. That's that's really cool. And was that at Oregon? Yeah, that's where they crowned the national champion. red Yes. So
Personal Updates: Marriage and Family
00:03:36
Speaker
cool. Well, congratulations. First of all, I know it was 2022 and a lot of people have congratulated you, but that is quite an incredible opportunity.
00:03:46
Speaker
feet. So since then, you've done even more incredible things. I didn't mention in your bio. So you, you have a child, right? Yes. Already. Yeah. And one on the way. yes And you're, you're married. And did I see, did you marry a BYU football player? Yep.
00:04:05
Speaker
I did. I did. Awesome. Awesome. And so tell us about your, your child. I have um a little girl named Jersey. i actually, um i was pregnant with her at nationals my senior year. Didn't know.
00:04:19
Speaker
We had no idea, but i was pregnant with her. She's a year and a half and then we're expecting another little girl in March. Awesome. yeah Well, I am a girl dad, three daughters. And so, you know, but I was always hoping for a boy, but then i could tell your husband right now that he's going to be treated very well throughout his life.
00:04:39
Speaker
Daughters seem to really treat their dads well. Yes, so he knows it. He knows it. Those might be your greatest accomplishments. And it's not easy, is it? But yeah you're you're dealing with all the morning sickness and everything right now, everything going on.
00:04:55
Speaker
Good on you for that. You're you're amazing for that. Thank you. It's better than a national championship. A hundred percent. I agree.
Effective Time Management: 'Win the Hour'
00:05:03
Speaker
Awesome. Well, I want to delve into some of our principles and get your thoughts from your own journey and your perspective.
00:05:10
Speaker
I sent you some things beforehand, but ah we we talk about something called win the hour. And when we say win the hour, we think win the day is kind of, it's almost too broad, right? Because when you're an athlete and a student and ah a friend and all of these things in high school or college,
00:05:31
Speaker
things shift from hour to hour. And it's a great skill to be able to take your energy and your motivation and everything that you have and be able to shift it to the most important thing during that next hour.
00:05:43
Speaker
And doing that, we call when winning the hour, right? And we encourage our young people to go 16 and 0. You should get eight hours of sleep. And so each hour of each day, win that hour. So I'm i'm really interested in What, like a javelin thrower at BYU who's a student, who's dating, who has friendships, who has all these things going on, how did you do that? How did you put your ener energy toward the most important thing at the time and time manage everything? What are some of the principles that guided you through that?
00:06:20
Speaker
Yeah. So um it wasn't easy at first. As a freshman, I had no idea. Going in, I was like, how am I going this? I was super overwhelmed. I had really, really bad anxiety. And i like to, anything I do, I will go 100%.
00:06:33
Speaker
So in the moment, in that hour, and whether it was studying, I would not think about track. I would not think about throwing. I would not think about relationships. I can't think about home, how homesick I was. I would think about school in that hour.
00:06:46
Speaker
And then once I got and And again, I had such bad anxiety, especially my freshman year. But what helped me was when I was in track and we had a track block of like three to four hours.
00:06:58
Speaker
When I was in that hour of throwing, I didn't think about the outside world. I just thought about my cues for throwing and what I needed to get done. And it really helped me set aside the world from what I'm doing in that moment.
00:07:12
Speaker
And people ask me a lot, they're like, how did you do it? Because college and i mean, I'm LDS. And
Journaling and Focus Routines
00:07:20
Speaker
so I wanted to date and get married. And so i really had to just what I'm doing, I'm putting 100% towards it in that hour.
00:07:30
Speaker
So I love that um you say when the hour because I was through and through what I'm doing, I will be 100% committed to it in that hour. Yeah. And how did you make that? Because some people, I think, like that philosophy makes sense to them. But maybe there's some skills that you did that helped you kind of okay, I'm going to shut out the outside world.
00:07:53
Speaker
Did you have anything that you did to do that? Yes, I am a firm believer believe in journaling. There's a guy, or yeah, guy. His name is Craig Manning. He's amazing. And he talks about journaling. And so, well, the first, for school, I'll say school, I would start off with a prayer.
00:08:11
Speaker
And um that would just set my mind to school and say, please help me study. Please help me focus. Bad ADHD. I have bad ADHD. So then we go back to the journaling. So I get done with that.
00:08:22
Speaker
And right before every practice, I sent a video to my dad of me just scrolling a screen recording of my phone. And it's a journal saying what I'm going to do that day.
00:08:33
Speaker
And it kind of, it shifts me over to track and, And says, I will throw this. I will do this today. I i am Ashton Reiner. was at the time.
00:08:44
Speaker
Ashton freaking Reiner. I will throw this. um and so it And then it would set me in the zone and focus on that. And then once I was done with that, I would kind of do something to shift into the real world.
00:08:56
Speaker
But yeah, definitely there has to be like a hard line for me to shift into the next thing that I'm going to focus on. So you had that routine every day, like on your phone, you had some things written on your phone that you would read every day that helped you shift into Ashton Reiner, the javelin thrower.
00:09:15
Speaker
yeah perfect right whether Whether it was on my phone, I had to write it. So like it was the same thing every day besides like three cues I was going to work on that day. But every day I would write on my phone or write it down in ah in a journal.
00:09:28
Speaker
If I didn't have the journal that day, that's when it was on my phone. Every single day I thrive on a routine. Anybody that knows me, I am i have to stick to a routine. So the journaling was great for me.
00:09:41
Speaker
Awesome. Would you mind sharing? Did you already share what those three things were? Because I'm sure you've committed. ah You said you had the same three things and then your cues for the day. yeah You tell us what the three things were and then what was the ah give us an example of cues for the day for someone who might be listening to this going, I need help with this. Those cues might actually what those look like might help.
00:10:02
Speaker
Yeah. So something that I did, so you're a great, again, Craig Manning, your brain doesn't process negatives. So I never said, i will not do this. i always said, I will do this. So I said, I will throw 60 meters.
00:10:17
Speaker
I will hit my weights. I will it was like, uh, was like throw far. There was like these three things i should really, i have them. Um, and then, and then the last, and then I would say three cues. So cues in javelin, um, I'll hit my block.
00:10:35
Speaker
I will stay back. And then another one, I will again, no negatives. And then the last one is I am freaking Ashton Reiner. My coach said at one time, my freshman year, and it kind of stuck. And I was like,
00:10:47
Speaker
I'm a writer. Like, like you take pride. It's good. Yeah. You take pride in your last name. It's something that you carry with you through your whole life. these I mean, I'm a Lunt now, but, um, it's something my dad would say growing up too. And so kind of fired you up. So that's the last thing I would put. And then I'd go to practice and it really shifted my mind every day.
00:11:08
Speaker
That is super cool and so helpful to do that. Um, i' love I love how specific you were with that, you know, because a young person right now who is going in, whether it's into, we have a lot of drill girls, we have a lot of basketball players, you know, all all sports, but my daughters did drill and college dance. And and so you know, every now and then they're sitting there, they're in the moment, they're in the practice.
00:11:36
Speaker
And it's like, they're still worried and burdened by all of these things. And I think they would love not to be, but you just gave us a way that Craig Manning, Yeah. Trained you on, right. That, that really helped you make that shift and leave those things behind so that you could focus on, on throwing the javelin. Yeah. and Yeah. Go ahead. Sorry. yeah No, you go, you go. Um, Craig Manning actually has a journal. Like, um, I highly recommend everyone,
00:12:05
Speaker
go look him up. I think he's on YouTube and some of his discussions are on YouTube, but he has a journal and it's like little things to write about your day, what you're going to do before practice, after practice, and then your thoughts.
00:12:18
Speaker
And then I brought that journal out to practice. And if I kind of like my mind kind of shifted a little, I would go straight to my journal and you'd write it down real quick and kind of, um, get your mind back into focus.
00:12:31
Speaker
Or I go, i go out into the field on the side. So there's like, we have a runway and then we go out to the side and I refocus my brain. And then we're allowed to come back to the runway. Cause you can get very frustrated with Javlin and I'm sure dance, um, high school, let's be real.
00:12:46
Speaker
you think the world is going to end in high school with any little inconvenience. So I really think journaling, coming back to just yourself and not the world and not social media, come back to that journal, write down what you're struggling with and how you're going to fix it. And that's why I think journaling is huge.
00:13:04
Speaker
And I wish I knew that in high school. Yeah. Yeah, me too. Me too. Not that you knew it, that I knew it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. yeah um And then you said something that you had to do something intentional, because when we say win the hour, we aren't just talking about sports. We're talking about make sure you're taking care of the classroom, make sure you're taking care of your relationships and everything else. Yes.
00:13:27
Speaker
You said you had to do something intentional to shift back to the to the world outside of throwing the javelin. Can you give us an example of what that looks like to shift back to the world?
00:13:38
Speaker
Yeah. So luckily for me, have like amazing team. We were all best friends. Um, we would go from the track into the weight room and I thought that that's same atmosphere, honestly, um, hype.
00:13:49
Speaker
Awesome. And then me and my, um, my teammates, we'd go get treatment after and we'd hot tub and ice bath. And that was like my social hour. Um, stress gone because we're just socializing in a hot tub.
00:14:02
Speaker
Like how fun is that? Um, and that's kind of my transition, honestly, like relaxing. I'm not throwing, I'm not doing track, um, or, uh, weights or school. Sorry.
00:14:14
Speaker
And then, um, what I usually do is I'd go up to the SAB. I'd go into like a quiet corner and kind of lay out my stuff, kind take a deep breath and say, okay, this is what I'm focusing on next.
00:14:26
Speaker
So I would have just me time, I think, to transition into school because we have school and then track, three, four hours of track, and then time, little bit of me time, and then you go right into school because you have to study, right?
00:14:42
Speaker
So i think it was just me time and then sitting down, taking a breath and going. Yeah. Yeah. I found people who are super successful like yourself. It seems that they're very intentional about their transitions. Mm-hmm.
00:14:56
Speaker
arrogant And taking that time, but i imagine you in the SAB there, the student athletic building. Yeah, right sorry. do Yes, SAB. That's great. and um And you're up in the corner and you're just taking time and you're sitting there catching your breath and saying, okay, I'm not going to let life happen to me.
00:15:14
Speaker
What do I want to do next? Like I'm going to catch my breath and be intentional about this next hour. And if we don't take that step, it's easy to As Justin Sua said, hes he's he says this thing we we relay to kids a lot that if you don't, if you aren't intentional about transitions, he says you live a life by default instead of a life by design.
00:15:37
Speaker
Yeah. Right. yeah And when you take a minute and plan the next step and say, okay, what do I want to accomplish in this next step? And then you attack that, then you live a life by design and not by default. And you seem to happen to life and go after your goals instead of just hoping they're going to happen.
00:15:54
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. Ashton, that's awesome. Thank you. That's yeah awesome. Thank you. Keep going. Yeah. What do you want? I was going to say, people that know me, they listen to this and be like, Ashton, you messed her around the SAB a lot, which I did. but I will say I'm an early bird. I wake up at 4.30 every morning still to go and get my workout in.
00:16:12
Speaker
But I would wake up at 6.30. 6am and get my a lot of my studying done. So from waking up, transitioning straight into school is what I personally did. I, I think getting everything done in the morning is just so much much better. Like I really do. So that's what I did. So if anybody listens to like Ashton, we remember you in college, I got my stuff done. Okay.
00:16:33
Speaker
That's great. But, but also ashen I mean, that, you know, we do need time to decompress, right? we We need time to laugh and to be with people and to just be present and put these down, right? yeah And to look people in the eyes and to laugh with people and to have relationships.
00:16:50
Speaker
When we're intentional about that, and this is my time to do that, I've paid a price early in the morning, so now I can laugh with and be, that's a very important part of life. And I think if we're tightly strung all the time,
00:17:03
Speaker
we'll lose our spring, right? yeah We'll lose yeah that. So burnout. That's awesome. Great. Do you mind if we move to ne another topic here? Let's do it. and Thank you for that. That was incredible.
Reflecting on Resilience and Challenges
00:17:14
Speaker
And so I know you've been through a lot of things. You've been through injuries and you opened up a little bit about an eating disorder that that you dealt with ah through college.
00:17:28
Speaker
We teach young people the importance of resilience, of bouncing back from difficulty. And I'm sure you face that in a number of ways throughout your your journey from that little teeny girl with the dad putting the javelin in her hand to where you are now with all the success that you've had and and the wonderful wife you've created for yourself. What have you learned that has helped you be resilient and overcome those difficulties in your life. And if you wouldn't mind, I would love if you would tell your story a little bit about your battle with an eating disorder and what you learned from that and how you came back from it because I think it would help a lot of
Overcoming an Eating Disorder
00:18:11
Speaker
people.
00:18:11
Speaker
Yeah. There was a couple of things I learned first with resilience is, first off, I thought track was my like my whole world, my whole purpose, my whole meaning, my identity.
00:18:24
Speaker
It's not, it's not. I have a daughter now and she is my purpose and husband. They're both like my purpose. And I will say my daughter's my identity now. And I love her so much, but a little about me, i have seven siblings.
00:18:38
Speaker
My parents, they're amazing. They're, they're pretty small people. I will say my mom's a little petite. My, um my dad was like, tiny. And he, he played college football and he was, he was small too. All my siblings are pretty small, petite.
00:18:53
Speaker
Um, growing up, I was the bigger kid. I just was, it was crazy how we had all these kids, like my parents had all these kids and then I was the bigger one. I was told it all the time. Um,
00:19:04
Speaker
there People would say at church, oh, you're pretty big for a Reiner. Like it was crazy. Shout out to my mom though. She never said anything to me about my eating, nothing. So my mom was amazing about it.
00:19:15
Speaker
Coming to high school, um I don't think I share this in my deep blue, but it's it's I look back and I just remember I never ate. When I say I never ate, um I would wake up about, I think it was like 5.30.
00:19:28
Speaker
I'd go feed the pigs, wake up my dad and say, let's go. And I might have something to eat. Maybe, maybe a protein shake. Then i would go and I would lift weights for an hour before school. And then I had weights right after.
00:19:43
Speaker
Um, and then I'd get to, and I would eat nothing. Then I would get to lunchtime and I might have food, might not. If I was starving, I would text my dad and say, Hey, can you get me a salad from the cafeteria?
00:19:55
Speaker
Mate, like this was rare that I would do that. So I'd not eat then. And then I was a three sport athlete, which with a lot of cardio, we, I played soccer, which is ton of running, played basketball, ton of running and track.
00:20:07
Speaker
And I was a runner too. Um, so then I would go through all of those and I wouldn't eat all day. And I don't know how I didn't pass out. Like, I really don't. And again, I was already a thicker girl. And so I feel like people just, they would have never known.
00:20:20
Speaker
i was overweight. I remember my doctor kind of saying something to my mom when I was in sixth grade. was overweight. I was really big. And then... I remember getting to like eighth grade, coming back, and I just grew. i think it was like four to five inches.
00:20:35
Speaker
um And I got really skinny. and I got really skinny, started high school sports. That's when I still didn't see that I got skinny because I was i was big, so I would never eat. And I would go through practices and I had no energy.
00:20:46
Speaker
That was super hard. So it started at a very, very early age and it was not good. I believe I could have been insane in high school if I have just ate in regards to like throwing.
00:20:59
Speaker
You need muscle, right? i was I was lifting so much and I wasn't really getting that much stronger. I was, but I just wasn't eating. I'd have protein shakes. But then I'd go home and my mom had a dinner and so I'd eat dinner and I'd go to bed.
00:21:14
Speaker
So I definitely ate dinner every night. My mom had nice cooked meal every day. Got to college and And so in high school, I was really good. won state my senior year, have this state record, which is great.
00:21:28
Speaker
Awesome. Yeah, it's fun. My little brother has a state record for the javelin. People don't know I'm a javelin thrower. My dad told me that I was going to a thrower, said I wasn't going to be a runner.
00:21:40
Speaker
was still a runner. But it was just great. He saw my potential. So told me I was going to throw BYU, which is awesome. He told me when I was eight years old, which is great.
00:21:51
Speaker
So then, which is crazy for dad, right? Like he kind of just knew my potential. That would have been awesome just to tell your daughter, you know, you're going do. So I got a scholarship to BYU.
00:22:02
Speaker
And this is kind of where... The eating took a really big toll, plus my anxiety didn't help. Got really depressed, really anxious. My freshman year, tried to get help. And I tried to actually go like a therapist, a counselor.
00:22:16
Speaker
And I got one of the students... which hard. I don't think they understood like the severity of like what I was going through. Anyways, my freshman year, I did really well.
00:22:28
Speaker
I started eating good. have a place called Legends. It's like an all you can eat like steak, fish, chicken, everything. I started eating pretty good. It was awesome. I threw 172 and placed 11th in the nation my freshman year.
00:22:41
Speaker
Awesome, right? I go into my sophomore year and my very first throw of my sophomore year, I was at U of and I tore my UCL, which if people don't know, it's a famous pitcher, baseball pitcher injury.
00:22:55
Speaker
have a scar. It's pretty cool. And I tore my UCL and I was done for the rest of the year. A lot of people don't come back as fast as I did. I pushed super hard. was like a year and a half recovery.
00:23:06
Speaker
And I came back in like nine months, pushed super hard. The day before we left to our first, what was it? To our first competition, COVID happened. And so like we pushed, like I pushed my body so hard to get back.
00:23:22
Speaker
COVID happened, right? So freshman year did great. Sophomore year, first row, tore my UCL. Redshirt sophomore year, COVID happened. So we're like, okay, we go home.
00:23:33
Speaker
And then think I met husband that year. I met my husband. Great. It's fine. Yeah. Yeah. Awesome. Love him. Love him so much. Yeah.
00:23:45
Speaker
Me and him started dating. And for some reason, we come back. And my junior year is when my eating disorder came back fully.
00:23:56
Speaker
I will be completely transparent. I got on birth control. I'm about to get married, right? Got on birth control. It completely messed me up. I was doing better with my eating disorder, but got birth control and I felt numb.
00:24:10
Speaker
Like I had no feeling whatsoever. I'm talking like, I'm like, do I love my husband? Like, this is so weird. So chat came around and I just kept losing weight, kept losing weight, kept losing weight.
00:24:25
Speaker
I didn't care to eat. And so that year started pretty good and then it just kept declining and one knew it was happening. I don't want to speak about it. I felt so embarrassed, like so embarrassed.
00:24:37
Speaker
I didn't want to tell him, oh, I got on the pill and now I don't feel myself, which a lot of girls do.
00:24:45
Speaker
And afterwards my coach was like, why didn't you tell me? why would I, like, I didn't want to go to you. I did go to someone. They told me over it. They told me get over it. It wasn't a coach.
00:24:55
Speaker
It was not a coach, I will say. So that year, again, I was ranked 11th my freshman year, right? And so red shirt COVID sophomore year comes around. I get on the runway at regionals and I feel nothing, which if you know me, I thrive off of like, um,
00:25:13
Speaker
adrenaline and I was like, oh my gosh, let's go. Let's go. I step on that runway and I feel nothing. Like, I'm like, Ashton, like yelling at myself, Ashton, you know how to throw, like what's going on?
00:25:25
Speaker
And I, did so bad. I did so bad. I remember just like crashing after that meet and just, I was, I never wanted to show my face again on a track because I was just, I was really good.
00:25:38
Speaker
people are like, what happened to her? Like, People could blame it on the surgery. No, everyone that knew me knew it was my eating disorder and how skinny I was. I like to throw 160 and have muscle and like to be at 160 pounds and threw.
00:25:52
Speaker
That was 138 pounds. I had nothing to carry me. And that was really scary time.
00:26:06
Speaker
I remember my husband's like, what's wrong with you? And I finally told him, I was like, I don't feel anything. Like I want to feel again. don't feel anything. Um, he's like, and I was like, and I don't want to eat.
00:26:17
Speaker
Like I do not care to eat. I had no appetite. he's like, what are we going to do? want you to track what you're, what you're eating. We tracked it. And at the end of the day, I was at 700 calories.
00:26:28
Speaker
That should be your breakfast, right? That should be your breakfast, right? Especially with all that you were doing physically and everything else. Yeah. But I had no idea because in high school, could do weights in the morning.
00:26:41
Speaker
didn't have to eat. And then I would go to soccer, basketball, track practice. I was doing a lot more running back then. Anyways, I switched up my medication. I started tracking.
00:26:54
Speaker
tried to get help, right? And... Sadly for me, this not everyone's experience. I didn't get the help I needed from those people. I'm someone that's like, okay, going just do on my own. I laughed when I saw the questions you sent me.
00:27:06
Speaker
It's like your eyes up. What was it again that we were talking about? What is it? Eyes up, right? My motto was I'm going to put my head down. So eyes down, but I'm put my head down and just work.
00:27:16
Speaker
I don't care what people look like. I don't care what they think I look like. I'm not fat. I know I'm not fat, even though my eyes, body dysmorphia, see that? Um, and I really just went to work. I went to the, I went to the gym and I was in there for hours and I was squatting till failure.
00:27:32
Speaker
I, um, I started taking creatine and my max in squat was like 185 pounds. And the time school came around, so like summer ended, I was squatting that for like 10.
00:27:45
Speaker
Like it was insane how much improvement I made. I remember coming back and everyone's like, whoa, like she's different. She's really different. Again, I've just, I just put my head down and worked.
00:27:56
Speaker
I know I had a lot of talent. My, my coach Ahani told me you're something special. Like you really are. So sorry, this is longer than I thought it would be. This awesome.
00:28:08
Speaker
Yeah. Thank you for sharing this. So I kind of have eating disorder in check, which I want people to know. Sadly, it never goes away. As much as I want to go away, I still struggle to this day.
00:28:21
Speaker
I'm pregnant and I'm still struggling. But kind of got it under control for that year. And I just, I'm going to eat what I want. I needed to gain weight. I got my metabolism. I totally crushed my metabolism in high school.
00:28:35
Speaker
So I had to build back up. By the end, I was eating 4,000 calories a day, which is kind of like a mind-uh. Um, yeah, but I needed it. And I, I looked great. Like I looked amazing.
00:28:47
Speaker
I was the strongest I'd ever been. And that year I won the national championship. Like I, I worked my butt off and I remember stepping on that runway and like feeling this, like, there it is.
00:28:59
Speaker
Like, there's my competitiveness. Like there's the fire that Ashton knows. And that's the feeling I wanted that, that previous year, you know? And so, yeah, I, Freshman year did great.
00:29:11
Speaker
Sophomore year, formal UCL. Then COVID happened. Then junior year, eating disorder, medication, everything crashed. Then junior year. So didn't even make it to nationals that year, by the way.
00:29:22
Speaker
What was it, Mike? Sophomore year. Never, didn't even make it to nationals. I went from not making it nationals to winning the national championship within a year. Wow. That takes a lot of work.
00:29:34
Speaker
I'm very humble about it, but it was also like, the people close to me knew how much work it was. And I, I really didn't do anything, but school and javelin and my, like focus on relationship.
00:29:49
Speaker
It's all I had time for, but that's all I wanted. And then the following year, um, I just had so many injuries, so I didn't do as well. I made it to nationals, which is great. But again, it's just injury after injury.
00:30:01
Speaker
I was pregnant. Didn't that one, but, um, But by that time, I was like, I won a national championship. I've done all these things. have overcome so much. I cried a lot because of how it ended.
00:30:14
Speaker
But was so proud of myself for like just overcoming all these obstacles and being able to say I was national champion. So, yeah. Yeah. Amazing. Thanks for sharing that.
00:30:25
Speaker
Yeah. That journey. Can I delve into it just a little bit? Sorry, it was so long. No, that was so awesome. Honestly, thank you for sharing that with us.
00:30:37
Speaker
I think it'll help a lot of people who look up to people like you and think, You know, I have a little bit of familiarity with eating disorders and things like that.
00:30:49
Speaker
There are so many people who look at those who are going through those things and they say, it's almost like you're tempted to say, oh, just snap out of it. You're beautiful. You're wonderful.
00:30:59
Speaker
And it's but it's so real to that person. Yeah. I'm just curious when you when you think back to that moment and you think of some key things.
00:31:12
Speaker
decisions you made, like things that were within your power
00:31:18
Speaker
overcome just that downward spiral that could have become. And it's always there. And it's something I'm sure you'll manage like you talked about. But But were there a few things that really helped you that might be helpful to someone else who's listening to this or has a child listening to this and thinking like, oh, my gosh, I think maybe I know what's going on with my own with my own daughter.
00:31:45
Speaker
What are some keys that helped you to to overcome? The biggest one talked about already is the journaling. The journaling helped me so much.
00:31:57
Speaker
And I think that kind of led into, I cared so much about what people thought of me. I hated it. We have a saying in my house. It's a sign. It says, comparison is the thief of all joy.
00:32:08
Speaker
And I compared myself so much. And I really do think because of social media these days, Kids compare themselves to others so often.
00:32:18
Speaker
And that's what I was doing. And so in my journal, I put, I'm on my own journey. I'm my own self. Who cares what people think? I was so embarrassed, might I add. I was so embarrassed that I did not make it to nationals.
00:32:30
Speaker
Like didn't look my teammates. But then I said, who cares? Half these people can't even make it to what I did. People can't make it to regionals. So I really took in my victories.
00:32:40
Speaker
Like you really have to take in your victories. I journaled my victories. And I really think that was a turning point. It was kind of just listing out everything that I'm doing right. I said, I'm going stop comparing myself.
00:32:52
Speaker
And I just started writing everything down. I really did.
00:32:58
Speaker
That's so awesome. That comparison is such a danger right now. In fact, having three daughters myself, one thing I've tried to instill in them, kind of two things that help.
00:33:10
Speaker
And one is just concentrate on the vertical relationship with God, right? Yes. He's steady and people around you, especially sometimes girls, guys too, but sometimes girls, there's like this competitive, it's all comparison and competition and where you are on the ladders of worldly success.
00:33:33
Speaker
And, and people are fine to bring you down if they can. when you're looking horizontal for validation, you're you're going to feel very unvalidated and your worth going to take a hit.
00:33:46
Speaker
When you look vertical for validation, then the right things, those things that you were writing in your journal, those are the things that matter.
00:33:57
Speaker
And other people's opinions, you almost kind of become bulletproof a little bit. People's opinions when you're focusing on being your best self. In fact, in our first book, we wrote this, seek to be your best, not the best.
00:34:10
Speaker
Yes. And one of the things about that is it's like when you're constantly comparing yourself instead of not to everyone else, instead of just who you were yesterday, then you, it's like you give your self-esteem over to it's subject to other people's opinions.
00:34:29
Speaker
Yeah. Yes. I agree. Yeah. That's, that's super powerful. Thank you for sharing that. Anything else on your mind that you're like, I would really want to say this to, to young people.
00:34:39
Speaker
Yeah. Even in high school, you share a locker room, right? I shared this before, but I shared a locker room with volleyball, soccer, gymnastics, I think.
00:34:51
Speaker
Yeah. And then the whole track team, which I will say there's so many different body types on a track team, right? You have throwers, you have sprinters, and you have distance girls, all in heps. But you have all different types of body types.
00:35:03
Speaker
And so you're here and you're looking to your right you have a sprinter girl with like shredded abs. And I'm like, don't compare, don't compare, don't compare, but it's really hard not to.
00:35:13
Speaker
Right. Um, that's when you're okay, you want to be your best self. Like you want to be your best self. And you do have to kind of get in that mode, which I told you, like I would write an Ashton freaking writer. And that's all I want to be.
00:35:24
Speaker
You just want to be the best version of yourself. You don't want to be the best version of your, your locker neighbor. Right. So that one, that was really hard. And in high school, you're doing the same thing. You're in, you're in locker rooms, getting dressed with other girls and you're you're comparing i will say you are comparing that's just so hard not to do so yeah comparison is a thief of all joy that's what it is there you go yeah yeah yeah and i love so you said i wish i could go back and tell ashton in high school to keep a journal to write down
00:35:57
Speaker
And just that little thing, am Ashton freaking Reiner. That seems to have deeper meaning to you than just like, ah, you know, but it's like, I am who I am and I'm happy with that.
00:36:12
Speaker
And I sense that. Yeah. Well, thank you so much, Ashton, for sharing that. That's amazing. That'll help a lot of people. And so one of our other principles is seek to bless, not to impress, to use your position as an athlete to help and to lift those around you, not just attract attention to
Using Platform for Awareness
00:36:34
Speaker
yourself.
00:36:34
Speaker
How is your platform being a national champion, being on a college campus? track team at BYU that's very visible and like their track team is blowing up.
00:36:45
Speaker
It's becoming more and more visible all the time. You were kind of the pioneer. Let's just be honest, though. I mean, you know. Yes, I was. Thank you. Thank you. how have you been able to use your platform as an athlete to help and lift other people?
00:36:59
Speaker
Yeah, we just came out that Deep Blue video, right? And telling people about my struggles. And I had so many people message me. After that video came out, they're like, I had no idea.
00:37:11
Speaker
If you knew me, I'm like the most spunky, like happy go-getter kind of person. And so I hit it a lot. And so it was really hard for me to open up about my eating disorder, my depression, my anxiety, all of that.
00:37:25
Speaker
Because people had no idea. So yeah, I loved it. Like people... because I was vulnerable about that. People started reaching out. There were so many people saying, have a daughter struggling in high school.
00:37:37
Speaker
We had to go seek medical attention for her because of her eating disorder. I've helped women in college right now help get over that and help them see like the beauty in themselves and that, um, your, uh,
00:37:54
Speaker
It doesn't matter what you see on the scale. That really does not matter. truly believe that. But it's just been amazing how many people have really reached out to me and said, thank you so much.
00:38:04
Speaker
Now I'm not as embarrassed about it. People are just women and men. I've had men reach out, say it's kind of embarrassing. Like they're embarrassed, but they're not as embarrassed now to seek help, which I love that I was able to impact that many people, which I didn't think I was going to.
00:38:22
Speaker
Yeah. And that's what we tell athletes to realize. everything that you do is more powerful because you're an athlete. Yes. That's a two-sided coin, right?
00:38:33
Speaker
Because if you're mean to people and you put others down and you bully, you do those things, you exclude. Those things hurt really bad when you're an athlete in the sport light is what we call it.
00:38:45
Speaker
But on the other side of that coin is when someone like you, a national champion, you know, a beautiful woman who's doing successful things in life, they look at you and when you share that, they're like,
00:38:58
Speaker
oh, that's powerful to me. That deep blue is powerful. And want to connect with that person. And I think that sports puts us in a position, like if you wouldn't have won the national championship and did track at BYU, you probably wouldn't have had a deep blue.
00:39:18
Speaker
You wouldn't have had a deep blue created about you. But because you are an athlete and you are in that sport like, then it gives you that microphone to speak out to a bunch of people.
00:39:32
Speaker
And so it's really cool, Ashton. I just have to say, like, thank you from probably thousands and thousands of people. for being willing to use your sport light to talk about these things because it really will help people.
00:39:49
Speaker
And so that's wonderful. What advice would you give to a young person who, you know, whether it's something like this, like you're doing now, sharing your story and your experience, or just someone who's at a high school that notices a lonely kid that doesn't seem to be connecting with anyone that's on the outside looking in all the time, or someone on their own team that's just never there when the team is together.
00:40:17
Speaker
And they want to reach out to that person. They know they should, but they feel little apprehension, like you probably felt. Do you have any advice to overcoming that apprehension of being vulnerable, reaching out to people, sharing your own story, connecting with others?
00:40:35
Speaker
Yeah, I feel like I've never had an issue with that. I feel like I'm just a very outgoing person.
00:40:44
Speaker
get that from my dad. And he kind of always told make friends with the kind of outcasts. I went to really small school and... the people that were on the varsity sports teams, they were, they were also on the band, like the pep band.
00:40:58
Speaker
Like I was in the pep band and then math, math team and honor society. And like, so we just knew everyone. You're right. So I never had, I really never had trouble reaching out with them.
00:41:09
Speaker
I feel like maybe some people think, oh, I will be less cool. If I, I reach out to those, those type of people, will be an outcast, but you can really if their light is dim over there and you really shine bright, like always thought, I was told there's like a light about me.
00:41:25
Speaker
I'm just, I was just a happy, bubbly person. Go shine your light on them and their light will shine as well. And so it's just, again, who cares what people think? Go make a friend.
00:41:35
Speaker
Go say, hey, come on. You look down right now. lot of people think, oh, if I go over there, they're going to dim my light. Maybe They're only going dim your light if you let them.
00:41:47
Speaker
So go bring them, be inclusive, bring them into your group. My parents always taught me that. So really never struggled with that. Yeah, I've always taught that.
00:41:58
Speaker
Yeah. I thought of an analogy as you were sharing that. That's really cool that we'll probably share with young people as we come up. It's like when you have that light, we call it the sport light, you know, that extra attention that's given athletes.
Spreading Positivity and Support
00:42:11
Speaker
It's like a candle, right? And some picture that by going over to another person that's an outcast, let's say. Let's use that phraseology. It's like dipping...
00:42:22
Speaker
dipping the candle in a bucket of water and it's going it's going to dim your light, but it's really not what I have found in my experiences. It's lighting the candle. It's like you go and you share your fire with them and that candle lights.
00:42:37
Speaker
And what happens is now there's more light. So it doesn't put out your light. It brightens the whole world. Right. And it makes that brighter. And that's been your experience.
00:42:48
Speaker
Oh yeah. I remember the day threw 60 meters, which is a huge milestone for javelin tours. We had a great team of job girls.
00:42:59
Speaker
We were ranked number one in the nation for like the average javelin throw. So I said, yeah, threw 60 or I don't know what I said. I remember, but I have to shout out my team right now because I didn't want to make it about me.
00:43:11
Speaker
Cause it was, I mean, it's an individual sport obviously, but I was, I feel like all the spotlight was on me. And one else was getting the love on the girls team. So I kind of said, but hey,
00:43:23
Speaker
My whole team, we're ranked number one in the nation. That's how good everyone else is. I mean, was very, very good. And my whole team is amazing. Like, let's not just stop with me.
00:43:35
Speaker
Let me shine my light on them real quick because felt bad. I felt bad. was like, all this attention on me. All this attention is on me. When my teammates are doing amazing too.
00:43:45
Speaker
And I remember making a post about them because was like, I don't want it all about me. They're doing so good. So just share the attention. You don't need it all. Yeah, that's awesome.
00:43:56
Speaker
Yeah. Well, Ashton, you're wonderful. Thank you for sharing everything today and taking time out of a time in your life when you're not feeling great all the time to share your story again.
00:44:10
Speaker
And we appreciate you. taken time to be on the especially for athletes podcast today as you've thought about these things and everything i just love to give one last if there's if there's anything else that came to your mind that you're like i wish i would have said this i don't care what the topic
Embracing Adversity and Support Systems
00:44:29
Speaker
is is there anything else on your heart that you're like well i do want to share this with people Yeah, adversity just part of life.
00:44:38
Speaker
It really is. I've come to learn that you don't want to say, why me? Why me? I used to say, why me? But why not me? I'd much rather have all those things come down on me than someone I love.
00:44:51
Speaker
So why not me? And another part is you are ever struggling with an eating disorder, reach out to your friends. And there's just something about being able to talk about openly.
00:45:03
Speaker
Again, people are just embarrassed of an eating disorder. It's an addiction. Hey, it's an addiction and people think, oh no, it's just an eating disorder. People don't understand.
00:45:13
Speaker
No, an eating disorder is an addiction and something about just opening up to someone, someone to talk to. Like I had my husband luckily to talk about it at the beginning.
00:45:25
Speaker
He didn't really understand, it was just nice to just get it all out there and be like, this is what I'm struggling with. Um, just talk to someone. Yeah. Awesome.
00:45:36
Speaker
Well, thank you so much. And thank you everybody for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast today. As always, keep your eyes up and do the work. Thank you for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:45:49
Speaker
To learn more about Especially for Athletes organization, get a copy of our book, The Sportlight, or to bring our program to your team, school, business, or organization, visit us at especiallyforathletes.org.