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142. Lessons from Charles Barkley on Taking Responsibility image

142. Lessons from Charles Barkley on Taking Responsibility

E142 · Especially for Athletes Podcast
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23 Plays4 months ago

In this episode of the Especially for Athletes podcast, Dustin and Shad break down a powerful interview with NBA legend Charles Barkley that covers anger, blame, and the moment Barkley decided to stop playing with bitterness and start playing for the right reasons. Barkley shares a raw and honest story about how unresolved anger and the desire to “prove people wrong” nearly defined his career—and how one moment of reflection helped him shift his mindset. Dustin and Shad reflect on what it means to “play with an edge” versus “playing on the edge,” and how athletes, parents, and coaches alike can learn from Barkley’s hard-earned wisdom.

Key Takeaways:

  • Be 100% Responsible – “She didn’t flunk you. You flunked you.” Barkley’s turning point came when he finally took ownership of his choices.
  • Playing With an Edge vs. On the Edge – Passion and intensity are great. But if they’re fueled by hate, it’s only a matter of time before you fall.
  • Pre-decide Your Lines – Athletes and parents alike need to know their personal limits before competition starts to avoid moments they’ll regret.
  • Competing Without Contempt – Proving others wrong might be motivating—but don’t let bitterness steal your joy or define your character.
  • The Power of Maturity – Barkley’s journey reminds us that true greatness isn’t just about skill—it’s about growth, humility, and self-awareness. 

Whether you’re an athlete, coach, or parent, this episode is a reminder to stay grounded, play with purpose, and keep your Eyes Up and Do the Work—for the right reasons.

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Credits:

Hosted by Shad Martin & Dustin Smith
Produced by IMAGINATE STUDIO

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Support the show: https://especiallyforathletes.com/podcast/

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Transcript

Introduction to Empowering Athletes

00:00:01
Speaker
Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast, where we explore essential principles that empower athletes to learn life's most valuable lessons through sports.
00:00:16
Speaker
Hello, everybody.
00:00:17
Speaker
Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:00:20
Speaker
What's up, Dustin?
00:00:20
Speaker
How are you today?
00:00:21
Speaker
Hey, Chad.
00:00:22
Speaker
Good to see you, buddy.
00:00:24
Speaker
Good to see you.

Charles Barkley: Candid Conversations and Life Lessons

00:00:25
Speaker
So a couple of weeks ago, you sent me this clip from Charles Barkley.
00:00:29
Speaker
There's this show in depth with Graham Bessinger and he sat down and had this hour conversation with Graham Bessinger and he talked about an incident in his life.
00:00:41
Speaker
It was a really cool clip, but tell me first, just what made you want to send that clip to me and what stuck out to you about that clip?
00:00:50
Speaker
Well, one of my, he's, Charles Barkley is one of my favorite personalities.
00:00:54
Speaker
I really liked him as a player back in the, you know, the eighties and nineties.
00:00:58
Speaker
He's been so fun to listen to on TV the last 20 years.
00:01:01
Speaker
That's really where he's made his mark.
00:01:04
Speaker
I think most young people probably don't realize how good of a basketball player, you know, he was.
00:01:08
Speaker
He's just so real.
00:01:09
Speaker
He's like the most authentic character.
00:01:13
Speaker
Yeah.
00:01:13
Speaker
Yeah.
00:01:14
Speaker
He's awesome.
00:01:14
Speaker
There's, there's things he says that I don't agree with.
00:01:17
Speaker
But I love the fact that he just speaks his mind and he understands that it's okay if you don't agree with me, but I'm not going to, you know, I'm going to say what I feel.
00:01:27
Speaker
And so I've just always enjoyed listening to him.
00:01:29
Speaker
And this interview, I'm not sure how I found it.
00:01:31
Speaker
I was just on a long drive and I'll look for different interviews.
00:01:35
Speaker
And it's actually from several years ago.
00:01:37
Speaker
But yeah, as I was listening to it, this particular piece,
00:01:41
Speaker
grabbed me and I immediately thought of a couple of our principals.
00:01:44
Speaker
There's several of them in this little story that he shares and shot it off to you.
00:01:49
Speaker
So I thought, I think it'd be good to listen to it and then talk about it for a minute.
00:01:53
Speaker
Yeah, let's do it.
00:01:54
Speaker
So here's Charles Barkley with Graham Bessinger talking about an incident that happened, what he learned from it.
00:02:01
Speaker
Really, really cool.
00:02:02
Speaker
Here we go.

Early NBA Career: Barkley's Anger Issues

00:02:03
Speaker
Well, because when I first got to the NBA, I was angry.
00:02:08
Speaker
You know, I was angry at Ms.
00:02:09
Speaker
Gomez's
00:02:10
Speaker
Ms.
00:02:10
Speaker
Gomez is my high school Spanish teacher.
00:02:14
Speaker
Whose class you flunked in, you didn't graduate?
00:02:16
Speaker
I flunked that.
00:02:20
Speaker
And I didn't get to graduate.
00:02:21
Speaker
I had to go to summer school.
00:02:23
Speaker
So I hated Ms.
00:02:23
Speaker
Gomez.
00:02:24
Speaker
You know, I was mad at my dad.
00:02:27
Speaker
Because my dad, he came, he lived in California.
00:02:35
Speaker
He came to see me graduate.
00:02:37
Speaker
And they didn't tell me right before I wasn't going to graduate.
00:02:40
Speaker
So he just kind of reamed me pretty good.
00:02:42
Speaker
And I said, tell to myself, this is the last time I'm ever going to let anybody control my life.
00:02:48
Speaker
I'm going to stick it to Ms.
00:02:49
Speaker
Gomez.
00:02:50
Speaker
I'm going to stick it to my dad.
00:02:52
Speaker
I'm going to stick to my high school.
00:02:55
Speaker
I'm going to stick it to everybody and shove it up their face.
00:02:58
Speaker
So my first...
00:03:02
Speaker
X amount of years, man.
00:03:03
Speaker
Like when I was in college, I was just going to kick everybody's ass.
00:03:06
Speaker
I was just going to maul anybody that got in my way.
00:03:09
Speaker
And then, so then I get drafted to the NBA.
00:03:12
Speaker
So then I still got the same attitude.
00:03:14
Speaker
And then I forget when the spit incident happened.
00:03:16
Speaker
It was probably my third or fourth year at the NBA.
00:03:20
Speaker
And I remember I got suspended, obviously, and should have.
00:03:25
Speaker
And I remember sitting in a hotel room.
00:03:28
Speaker
And I was like,
00:03:30
Speaker
Dude, what the hell is wrong with you?
00:03:33
Speaker
What are you so angry about?
00:03:37
Speaker
You know, the next couple of days I sit down and I said, okay, it wasn't Ms.
00:03:42
Speaker
Gomez's fault, you flunked Spanish.
00:03:44
Speaker
Okay, let that go.
00:03:49
Speaker
And then my dad, I says, hey, it didn't work between your mom and dad.
00:03:54
Speaker
He did fly from LA to Alabama to see you graduate and you big dummy didn't graduate.
00:04:00
Speaker
Okay, that's on you too.
00:04:02
Speaker
Like, okay, you don't have to be mad at your high school, you flunked Spanish.
00:04:08
Speaker
And then from that day forward, every time I played basketball, I said, just let people see your talent.
00:04:15
Speaker
You don't have to be mad at anybody else.
00:04:18
Speaker
And so that was the turnaround for me.
00:04:20
Speaker
Because, and I've used this analogy, whether you are Ron Artest, Mike Tyson, Dennis Rodman, guys I respect as people.
00:04:32
Speaker
But I think they played like I did, on the edge.
00:04:36
Speaker
But I think if you play sports on the edge, it's not a matter of if you go off the cliff.
00:04:43
Speaker
It's just a matter of when.

From Anger to Accountability: A Mindset Shift

00:04:45
Speaker
All right, Chad.
00:04:46
Speaker
So yeah, thanks for cutting that up and allowing us to listen to that.
00:04:50
Speaker
It's a great interview.
00:04:51
Speaker
He goes on to talk about other things in this interview.
00:04:53
Speaker
He talks about his time on the dream team and some other things in his career.
00:04:58
Speaker
He had a pretty crazy career, but that particular story of playing on the edge and that story of him
00:05:05
Speaker
being angry and blaming some people for some circumstances that, you know, for his reaction to things and he blamed people for it.
00:05:13
Speaker
And it took him a minute to realize, hey, you know, my favorite part I think is when he said, talking about, you know, Mrs. Gomez, when he says, you know, she didn't flunk you, you flunked you, right?
00:05:24
Speaker
Like you're the one who, you're the reason you didn't graduate.
00:05:27
Speaker
Yeah.
00:05:28
Speaker
But it took him several years to get to that point.
00:05:31
Speaker
And, you know, I think his advice there was to tell people that, look, don't make that same mistake that I made because you can end up doing some things.
00:05:40
Speaker
He did something that
00:05:42
Speaker
Fortunately for him, he did it when there wasn't social media, or it would have blown up even 100 times more than it did.
00:05:49
Speaker
But I remember this spitting incident that he's talking about.
00:05:53
Speaker
Imagine if that had happened now and there had been all the different angles and everybody would have shared it and it would have been all over everything.
00:06:00
Speaker
But he spit on somebody on the sidelines and he was angry and he lashed

Sports and Anger: The Consequences

00:06:06
Speaker
out.
00:06:06
Speaker
And for a lot of years, he had a very negative reputation.
00:06:12
Speaker
no way or nobody would want to invite Charles Barkley to speak to their kids or to be on a TV show and represent, you know, TNT like he has at that particular time because of some of the ways that he was acting and things that he was doing.
00:06:25
Speaker
In fact, didn't he become famous for saying, I'm not a role model.
00:06:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:06:29
Speaker
Like, I don't want to be a role model.
00:06:31
Speaker
Like, don't consider me a role model.
00:06:33
Speaker
Stop telling me I'm a bad role model.
00:06:35
Speaker
I don't, you be a father to your kid.
00:06:37
Speaker
I'm not a role model.
00:06:38
Speaker
I'm a basketball player.
00:06:39
Speaker
You know, like he was kind of famous for that.
00:06:41
Speaker
Yeah, and that was a famous commercial that actually probably has some truth in it.
00:06:45
Speaker
I know a lot of people, you know, that was a very controversial issue.
00:06:49
Speaker
And I remember hearing it and I kind of, you know, I guess to a point I agreed with what he was saying, right?
00:06:55
Speaker
It's not his job to raise our kids.
00:06:58
Speaker
It's our job as parents to raise our kids.
00:07:00
Speaker
And if pro athletes do stuff they shouldn't do, okay, but that shouldn't, if we blame the athlete for our son doing something, right?
00:07:10
Speaker
because the athlete did it, then we're just, you know, we're, that's passing the buck.
00:07:14
Speaker
That's not the athlete's fault.
00:07:16
Speaker
Right.
00:07:16
Speaker
Right.
00:07:17
Speaker
Right.
00:07:18
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely.
00:07:20
Speaker
But yeah, he, that, that playing on the edge thing is something and that competing with contempt, which is, you know, principle that we talk about a lot.
00:07:28
Speaker
And then the maturity to come into the realization of it and being mature enough to identify the
00:07:34
Speaker
and apologize really and change the way he approached stuff I think is the real meat and potatoes of that interview.
00:07:40
Speaker
Yeah, I love what he said about playing on the edge.
00:07:43
Speaker
He even referenced some people that we're all familiar

Coaching Challenges with Aggressive Athletes

00:07:46
Speaker
with.
00:07:46
Speaker
You know, you have the Mike Tyson with the Vander Holyfield biting his ear, a piece of his ear off.
00:07:52
Speaker
You have Dennis Rodman, who all of the things that he did, you know, and you had Ron Artest, that malice in the palace that ran up and the only instance I know of where players were throwing punches at fans.
00:08:07
Speaker
Yep.
00:08:08
Speaker
And his warning was, like, he was playing with so much anger, and he said, if you play on the edge, it's not if you go off the edge and do something stupid, it's when.
00:08:22
Speaker
Yeah.
00:08:23
Speaker
So my question for you, Dustin, like, you've coached in so many settings, and you have all these high school football players right now that you're coaching.
00:08:31
Speaker
I'm sure there's heated moments in the game and there's a ton of different personalities, right?
00:08:36
Speaker
Like there are some Ron Artest personalities, Charles Barkley personalities on every high school football team, I'm sure.
00:08:44
Speaker
What do you think it looks like when he says, if you play on the edge, it's not if, but when you fall and make a mistake, that's going to impact your future that people are going to know you for.
00:08:57
Speaker
What do you think he's describing when he says, if you play on the edge, describe playing on the edge

Healthy Competition vs. Destructive Play

00:09:02
Speaker
for me?
00:09:02
Speaker
Well, I think the way he was describing it and the way that maybe coaches would describe it, because I've used that phrase before, being on the edge.
00:09:11
Speaker
And I would think that most coaches, when they talk about playing on the edge, under the umbrella, I think of what Charles Barkley was talking about.
00:09:19
Speaker
Although, like I said, he was talking a little bit more about the
00:09:23
Speaker
The anger, the being motivated by hate and by anger and by revenge part of it.
00:09:28
Speaker
When I say playing by the edge or other coaches I hear say playing on the edge, I think they're talking about you do have to have a level of aggression and a level of just passion and energy that
00:09:39
Speaker
is sometimes borderline too much.
00:09:41
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:42
Speaker
Or borderline.
00:09:43
Speaker
You have to have an edge to you.
00:09:45
Speaker
You have to have a chip on your shoulder.
00:09:46
Speaker
Like those are phrases that are used.
00:09:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:49
Speaker
Yeah.
00:09:49
Speaker
And I think that everybody, when you're in the middle of whatever the sport is, if the game's getting a little physical or it's intense and it's, it's, you know, having a little bit of fight in you, even a little bit of attitudes to not back down and let somebody, you know, walk over you.
00:10:05
Speaker
When you're playing at somebody else's place and it's loud and you're being heckled or talked down to, and you do, you have to have a little bit of an edge to you.
00:10:13
Speaker
You can't just show up and just roll over, right?
00:10:17
Speaker
So in that sense, I think coaches want their players to have a level of passion and energy about them.
00:10:24
Speaker
that doesn't embarrass themselves or embarrass the team.
00:10:27
Speaker
But, you know, the opposite of that is a kid playing that just is out there, that just doesn't really care.
00:10:33
Speaker
And that's very frustrating for a coach.
00:10:35
Speaker
So you kind of like those guys that play with a little bit of a chip on their shoulder and maybe are on the edge.
00:10:40
Speaker
I think what Charles Barkley is referring to, though, is when it's just pure, real deep, embedded play.
00:10:47
Speaker
historical hate.
00:10:49
Speaker
It goes back deep in your life.
00:10:51
Speaker
It's years ago and it's just, it's embedded in there and it's this, like he said, he was just gonna maul everybody in sight.
00:10:58
Speaker
He was just gonna kick everybody's ass is what he said.
00:11:00
Speaker
It was just this, I don't care about anybody and I'm gonna show everybody that I've been done wrong, that I'm the victim and so everything I do is to show everybody that they were wrong about me.

Fostering Healthy Competition in Teams

00:11:12
Speaker
when the reason that he got a bad grade had nothing to do with not liking his basketball attitude.
00:11:19
Speaker
It had to do with he didn't go to class.
00:11:21
Speaker
And in 2025, in the current landscape that we live in,
00:11:27
Speaker
I think we have to be a little more honest with kids sometimes and parents have to be a little bit more honest with it's not always the umpire's fault or the coach's fault or the teacher's fault or the, you know, it's usually because somebody didn't go to class enough or study enough or somebody didn't go to weight room enough or practice enough.
00:11:46
Speaker
Those are the reasons.
00:11:47
Speaker
And it took him several years to realize it's not my, yeah, my dad and mom's situation didn't work out.
00:11:54
Speaker
I wish I'd had my dad in my life more.
00:11:56
Speaker
I wish I had been able to graduate and had that experience.
00:12:01
Speaker
But to be bitter your whole life and then to let a sport that you love be played in such a way that expresses that bitterness, he was never going to really enjoy basketball.
00:12:14
Speaker
The thing about Charles Barkley now...
00:12:17
Speaker
In fact, a professional golfer just two weeks ago, John Rahm, actually talked about this in his interview.
00:12:23
Speaker
He played really bad in the last nine holes or so of a major golf tournament.
00:12:28
Speaker
He quoted Charles Barkley, because Charles Barkley says this all the time.
00:12:33
Speaker
He says, we are so blessed to do what we do, play basketball for a living.
00:12:38
Speaker
Now I talk about basketball for a living.
00:12:40
Speaker
I'm so blessed.
00:12:41
Speaker
I have nothing to complain about.
00:12:42
Speaker
I get paid money.
00:12:44
Speaker
to talk about and to watch basketball.
00:12:46
Speaker
And this golfer, John Rahm, was referring to that too.
00:12:49
Speaker
He said, look, I get paid to golf.
00:12:52
Speaker
If I have some bad, I play bad the last nine holes, but I still, like, this is what I do for a living, right?
00:12:58
Speaker
So it took Charles a minute to realize that.
00:13:01
Speaker
When he did, his career was, you know, I think he played happier.
00:13:05
Speaker
But yeah, playing with an edge is, I guess, when you're like, the edge edge, when it's motivated by hate and anger,
00:13:13
Speaker
It's just a matter of time, like he was referring to, that you're probably going to snap and do something that's going to embarrass you, your family, your friends, your school, your team might get you in big trouble.

Managing Intense Personalities Effectively

00:13:24
Speaker
And so you have to understand that if that's your personality, if you have a temper issue, right, if you're easily...
00:13:33
Speaker
angered by something on the team or by situations that happen in games, you're ultra, I don't even use the word competitive, that's I think a sellout.
00:13:41
Speaker
You're just ultra intense.
00:13:43
Speaker
Then you have to understand that edge for you, that's a far cliff that you're gonna walk off eventually.
00:13:49
Speaker
And realizing that that's your personality, you gotta kind of make sure you might get five feet from the edge, but you can't get to the literal edge, because you'll fall over and ruin your life possibly.
00:14:02
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:03
Speaker
I've been thinking a lot.
00:14:04
Speaker
I was listening even this morning as I was driving around doing some things.
00:14:09
Speaker
I was listening to a podcast on the Big 12 conference.
00:14:13
Speaker
And, you know, there's this stuff that's going on at BYU.
00:14:16
Speaker
You know, quarterback has been accused of sexual assault.
00:14:21
Speaker
And then last year you had up at the University of Utah, they were picked to win everything and just crumbled, had a bad, bad season.
00:14:31
Speaker
And they were doing this interview and the guy was like, yeah, in my eyes, the guest, BYU's done.
00:14:39
Speaker
Like BYU's done.
00:14:41
Speaker
Like all their hopes for the, for next season, it's done, you know?
00:14:45
Speaker
And, and now the fact that no one's talking about the University of Utah anymore, these are just two colleges you and I are familiar with.
00:14:52
Speaker
Yeah.
00:14:53
Speaker
I think there's a healthy, like, if I was,
00:14:57
Speaker
a BYU player and I heard people saying, oh they're done.
00:15:02
Speaker
I think there's a healthy edge where it's like, really?
00:15:05
Speaker
Watch this.
00:15:06
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:07
Speaker
Or University of Utah, they talk about now like they're this irrelevant school, even though last year they lost like six one-score games, right?
00:15:16
Speaker
Yeah.
00:15:16
Speaker
And I could see them right now in workouts being like, yeah, just watch.
00:15:21
Speaker
Just wait.
00:15:22
Speaker
That's a healthy edge.
00:15:24
Speaker
The anger that I'm going to hurt somebody, I'm going to
00:15:30
Speaker
like play with rage, that's the stuff where you're playing on the edge instead of with an edge.
00:15:37
Speaker
And I think that those are two very different things.
00:15:40
Speaker
It's okay to play with an edge.
00:15:41
Speaker
It's not okay to play
00:15:44
Speaker
on the edge right and and i think like my dad used to always tell me growing up the easiest time to make a decision and not do something stupid is before you're in the situation you know like if you're going to a party the easiest time to decide i'm not going to drink no matter what i'm not going to ever touch alcohol well that decision's way easier made before you walk in the door than when people are trying to persuade you to do it
00:16:12
Speaker
And I think that that might be a healthy way.
00:16:14
Speaker
If someone knows they have a little bit of an edge to them and that they're on the spectrum from careless to intense, you know, they're pretty intense.
00:16:25
Speaker
It'd be good to say, okay, here's some lines I'm not going to cross.
00:16:29
Speaker
Like between the whistles...
00:16:33
Speaker
I'm going to, it's going to be like, I'm bringing havoc for, for, from whistle to whistle, you know, I'm bringing havoc, but I'm never going to purposely try to hurt somebody.
00:16:43
Speaker
I'm never going to, you know, cheap shot.
00:16:47
Speaker
I'm never like, there are some things you could decide before, you know,
00:16:52
Speaker
that you're not going to do that I think would be super helpful if you're someone with an edge.
00:16:57
Speaker
I'm just thinking of that player out there that's like, I'm kind of that guy.
00:17:01
Speaker
I'm on the Ron Artest, Charles Barkley.
00:17:04
Speaker
Just within the parameters of the game, destroy people.
00:17:08
Speaker
But I'm never going to cross these lines.
00:17:12
Speaker
And I think that that might be a helpful discussion for a parent or a coach who's listening to this going, oh my gosh, I'm coaching the Charles Barkley or my kid is a Charles Barkley, a Ron Artest type person.
00:17:23
Speaker
We need to have this discussion about lines that won't be crossed.
00:17:26
Speaker
So any final thoughts on this, Dustin?

Promoting Self-awareness and Responsibility

00:17:29
Speaker
It's really easy when you play that way.
00:17:31
Speaker
And as you were saying that, I was thinking about, you know, there were things that there were people that I wanted to
00:17:39
Speaker
kind of prove wrong and there still is.
00:17:42
Speaker
I mean, I had stuff just in coaching this last year.
00:17:44
Speaker
There were some things that motivated me to coach differently or to coach better and sometimes those are other people.
00:17:53
Speaker
So I don't know that that's necessarily a bad thing as long as you know, like you said, if you're playing with an edge, not on the edge, that you know where your line is and that you're very sensitive to the fact that if I get to this part, this line,
00:18:09
Speaker
You know, bad things can happen.
00:18:11
Speaker
And I think that, you know, if you're somebody who loses your temper quickly at your son's basketball games while you're watching him.
00:18:17
Speaker
Yeah, even parents.
00:18:18
Speaker
That's a great point, Dustin.
00:18:19
Speaker
Like, there are Charles Barkley parents, not just players.
00:18:22
Speaker
In fact, probably more.
00:18:24
Speaker
Yeah, exactly.
00:18:25
Speaker
Yeah.
00:18:25
Speaker
And you know that.
00:18:26
Speaker
Like, just look in the mirror and say, look, I...
00:18:31
Speaker
If you've ever said anything other than, oh, come on, or something in a basketball, if you've directed a comment directly at a referee or an umpire, other than kind of under your breath to the person sitting next to you that that was a foul or something, if you've directed something at an umpire or a ref in hopes that they would hear it,
00:18:50
Speaker
then you have a little bit of an issue.
00:18:53
Speaker
And something could happen so much that you might say something really mean or really wrong and really get yourself in trouble.
00:19:01
Speaker
So you have to know that.
00:19:02
Speaker
And like you said, you have to kind of make that decision beforehand that I'm just gonna have to sit and butt my butt in my leg, because I have a tendency to fly off the handle a little bit.
00:19:11
Speaker
And if you play that way,
00:19:13
Speaker
Especially nowadays where so many more cameras and things are being recorded and taking pictures of things.
00:19:20
Speaker
You don't want to do something that's going to ruin you and be what defines you when somebody Googles your name.
00:19:26
Speaker
Because you justify your actions by, well, I'm proving people wrong.
00:19:31
Speaker
And in doing so, you act like a fool.
00:19:34
Speaker
Your motivation is hate and revenge and not to be successful because you love the sport.
00:19:39
Speaker
And it becomes very selfish too.
00:19:42
Speaker
It's not to win so much with your team, it's to prove people wrong.
00:19:46
Speaker
You're playing backwards.
00:19:47
Speaker
You're trying to prove people from yesterday instead of forward and the people I'm with now and what do I have coming and enjoying the fact that you are able to play a sport that you love.
00:19:59
Speaker
So we just have to be careful.
00:20:00
Speaker
All of us have a level of that, whether we're playing or

Reflecting on Mistakes and Advising Others

00:20:03
Speaker
not.
00:20:03
Speaker
And it's probably a good inventory check to say, okay, how am I doing?
00:20:08
Speaker
Where am I at?
00:20:09
Speaker
What's my line?
00:20:10
Speaker
Am I somebody who could...
00:20:11
Speaker
fall off the edge.
00:20:13
Speaker
What are those triggers that light me up, that get me fired and get me going and be smart enough to recognize those and stop it when it happens.
00:20:22
Speaker
Because if not, you get in the moment and things get out of control and then people lose their minds.
00:20:28
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:29
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:29
Speaker
I love the phrase, be a hundred percent responsible.
00:20:34
Speaker
Like you can't just say I'm a hothead.
00:20:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:20:38
Speaker
I'm really competitive.
00:20:39
Speaker
I'm just so competitive.
00:20:41
Speaker
I'm just so competitive that I can't control myself.
00:20:44
Speaker
Like, I love how you said that he, him sitting here in a hotel room and going, what the heck are you doing with, you know, and having that realization, like we need to have that realization to the parent who's screaming at, you know, 15 year old referees on a soccer field or,
00:21:05
Speaker
or coaches or whatever, like you need to sit in a hotel room and go, dude, what the heck are you doing?
00:21:13
Speaker
Like, what are you doing?
00:21:15
Speaker
Right?
00:21:16
Speaker
And same with the players, same with coaches.
00:21:19
Speaker
Like this excuse, I am a hothead and I am ultra competitive.
00:21:24
Speaker
Well, that's fine.
00:21:25
Speaker
There's a lot of ultra competitive people that are not idiots that don't do stupid things that don't fall off the cliff.
00:21:33
Speaker
And so you got to know that, take that inventory like you talked about.
00:21:37
Speaker
So.
00:21:38
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:40
Speaker
I agree.
00:21:41
Speaker
Good

Conclusion and Inspirational Resources

00:21:42
Speaker
one.
00:21:42
Speaker
The whole interview is good.
00:21:43
Speaker
If you're looking for a good interview to listen to, that's a good one, but I thought that was a.
00:21:48
Speaker
Thought that was a good message and hopefully can help a parent or coach or one of the athletes we work with.
00:21:55
Speaker
We'll put the whole link to the whole interview because it really is inspirational in nature.
00:22:00
Speaker
It's just awesome.
00:22:01
Speaker
Goes along a lot with the principles that we're talking about.
00:22:04
Speaker
And so we'll put the link in our show notes.
00:22:06
Speaker
Grateful for that interview by Graham Bessinger.
00:22:08
Speaker
And Dustin, thank you so much for your thoughts there.
00:22:12
Speaker
Eyes up.
00:22:13
Speaker
Do the work.
00:22:14
Speaker
Thank you for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:22:17
Speaker
To learn more about Especially for Athletes organization, get a copy of our book, The Sport Light, or to bring our program to your team, school, business, or organization, visit us at especiallyforathletes.org.