Transcript
Speaker: You are listening to Something Rather Than Nothing. Creator and host, Ken Volante. Editor and producer, Peter Bauer. This is Ken Volante with the Something Rather Than Nothing podcast and have another fascinating guest for you, Bex Carlos.
Speaker: And I encountered Bex on the East Spooky Tales, a great podcast with Christina and MJ. That was an April 14, 2023 episode called Ghost Stories, Tequila, and More with Bex of Tutia Bruja. And the reference there is to Bex Carlos, who we have, and her podcast, which I also enjoy very much, Tutia Bruja. Welcome to the show, Bex.
Speaker: Thank you for having me, Ken. I'm so excited. And I'm always fascinated to find out like how people find me. So that's the... I know. She's so great. And it was a pleasure to be on her show. So I'm excited that you listened to it. And you know, we're gonna probably expand a little bit about the stories from there and just, you know, whatever else comes up.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, I really appreciate that. That's such a great podcast, and I really enjoy your podcast. One cool thing is I know there's an episode or two that's in Spanish, and just recently, over the last couple years, I've realized that I have a much greater understanding of Spanish, having listened, listening to it, and understanding conversations, even in my work as a union rep.
Speaker: in realizing that it's more towards speech. So I have a personal goal to get where I can bring up my speaking of Spanish, but I listened to the episode in Spanish, really enjoyed it.
Speaker: and enjoy the show. So about East Spooky, just great stories that Christina and MJ bring about from different regions of the Americas.
Speaker: And again, that's where I encountered you on the show. And I was just really surprised to see the amount of audio work that you've done, like podcast work of putting together other podcasts, such as Balanced Black Girl. That's what she did, Dear Franny. And I was like, whoa. There's a whole bunch you've done around audio and about podcasts. But starting with podcast specs,
Speaker: What's going on with podcasts right now? Everybody's talking about them. I think anybody below the age of 30, about half of those folks will have listened to a podcast, at least one podcast in a month. What about podcasting excites you? Why do you do it?
Speaker: So I have to go back because like even before I did podcasts, I had about I worked in commercial radio for like seven years. I went to school knowing that I wanted to do that for at least a time in my life because I think I have so many memories of my dad like he was
Speaker: he worked for a union, he worked for the Ford plant. So like working on cars and being in cars and running to like get parts for said cars, like always involved music. And I feel like that was a way that I bonded with my father and audio was just always something very important to me. I speak two languages, you know, I feel like through time and just life experience, I've gained that like audio is the form of like oral storytelling that we can continue.
Speaker: So I had this whole foundation, and then the radio thing didn't really work out in the way that I wanted. And so that's sort of how I fell into podcasting. It was just sort of like, I got to figure it out. It's funny enough, I was going to my first trip to Europe. Well, I guess technically my second, because the first time I went to Ireland. But the second one, I was going to explore a bunch of different places, and I had to accumulate the money for that. And I was like, oh my god, how am I going to fund this trip? And I had joined this podcasting group.
Speaker: that it's called Women of Color Podcasting, WOC Podcasting, and it started because there were
Speaker: Spotify had offered, oh, we're trying to get like some different applications in for like more diversity. We would love to hear back. And, you know, there were maybe like 18 slots and thousands of podcasts. Oh my goodness. Yeah. Thousands. And so it was just like, wow, there's this big need, this big like mesh of because, you know, in this group, it was all types of diversity. It was like black women and it was like,
Speaker: Latin and Mexican women. There were people who were of Asian descent. There were just so many different types of people. And it was just so amazing because in this group, a lot of us started networking and working with each other. And it's
Speaker: It's funny you mentioned because sometimes I forget all of the podcasts I've worked at on at this point because at the time it was just like a right place right time I made so many connections to this day, you know, I still interact with a lot of those people who even if they're not specifically, you know in a space to want to work with me they help make those connections like hey, I know somebody this person this person and
Speaker: You know, that was in 2018. And so it's been, what, like five years or so? So it's been kind of just a wild ride of just like, I will do it. Like, yes, because I've worked freelance, you know, and I'm in the Midwest and I don't get the same opportunities sometimes that like the people on the coast do, just because there's so much more focus on like culture and art and
Speaker: I manifested it. I've made it happen for myself. Yeah, that's great to hear and thanks for spending some more time to talk about your previous work there. I was just startled. You hear about these things, amount of applications for these type of slots and sometimes just the sheer numbers tell you the story of
Speaker: folks who got a lot of great stories to tell or great program or great history to tell or politics or whatever they have to say. And it's like, give us some space. Let's crowd into this. I mean, 18 slots. It'd be like, well, let's start with 800 so we can get the top stuff.
Speaker: Really, really great to hear how you went into it. And you mentioned the Midwest, the St. Louis area, is that correct? Yeah. Yeah, I made it to St. Louis once and I was so impressed by the art museum there. And I remember being startled at the time because I didn't know that one of my favorite painters, Max Beckman,
Speaker: Oh, there's so many Beckman. Oh, my God. It's like I got to tell you, Bex, I didn't know that I was a Beckman fan. I knew very little about St. Louis. I grew up in Rhode Island, lived out in Wisconsin for quite some time and now out in Oregon.
Speaker: Um, but it was, it was just, I was there in like the atrium area and I'm looking around and it was like basically, you know, just being blasted by like your favorite painter all around you when you had no idea that was going to happen. And it was divine timing. Oh my God. That's amazing. I love that for you.
Speaker: Yeah, it was quite the blast. I also got a wolf tattoo in St. Louis, and that's the end of my brief St. Louis stories, but let it back to you, Bex. I wanted to ask you about your podcast, which I enjoy. Maybe you could tell listeners a bit more about it.
Speaker: and about the identity and the term bruja and how you use that and what it means to the show.
Speaker: Sure. So yeah, I host a show called Tutia Bruja. And it's interesting because I was, I think after observing and watching so many people like doing their podcasts and the stories that they told, I was just like, what am I really trying to do here? You know, like, what am I really? And so I was in Mexico, and
Speaker: my cousins have kids you know like um and i guess it's not that weird i'm in my 30s but like my siblings none of us have kids and by choice like we love to travel and and i was visiting family in mexico and i just was like oh my god i'm someone's thea and it was just like this very like whoa that's sweet that's yeah
Speaker: Yeah and and it was uh I don't know it made me realize that I'm so grateful for like you know just like the youth and the fact that they have so many different types of role models and uh because Bruja is such a scary word such a taboo word still in Mexico you know like I have a lot of family members who because I
Speaker: And it's interesting because my Brujeria is just about reconnecting with the things that gave me strength, like finding the historical and relevant and cultural power of my ancestors and how that applies to me. Kind of circling back, I was on a Spooky Tales because my family is from the town of Tequila Jalisco, which is the birthplace of Tequila. And when you're from a town that the main
Speaker: thing export is is alcohol, you know, it's a, it's a very layered context, you know. And so like I, and this is all relevant, I promise I'm getting to the point, but I started like just learning so much about my ancestors learning so much about myself. And I just started like everything starting making sense in this thing, like divine timing. If I if I were to say main character moment to you, do you know what that means?
Speaker: No, tell me exactly. So a main character moment is like a moment that just feels like you are the main character of like everything, you know, because like sometimes there'll be like certain songs that play, you know, in the background that really solidify like, Oh my God, there's like a soundtrack to everything that's happening. I love that. I love that. Yeah. So surreal, you know,
Speaker: And so I just started having a lot of these finger quote moments where everything's like, I feel like I'm doing exactly what I need to do, you know? And I'm the family member who I guess struggles a little bit because I'm the artist, you know? Like I'm creating and I'm figuring out things on my own terms and I'm creating on like,
Speaker: levels that feel right to me. And so, you know, with the podcast, I feel like I was like, I want to listen to a show where someone has this, like, aunt, you know, that essentially just talks about, like, these are the things that she's learned. These are the things that she's gone through the lessons she's making that, you know, I talked to different people who are practitioners of magic in their own right, mostly focusing on the perspective of like women of color and marginalized people and
Speaker: and queer people and how our magic works for us. It's been a wild ride with the show.
Speaker: I started it and it was weird because I also felt like the sense of responsibility because I was creating this sense of art for myself. Like I'm like, oh yeah, this is going to be so cool. Like whatever, whatever. And it was right when George Floyd was murdered. And I felt this responsibility of like a lot of people are just feeling so much right now and they don't know how to be in service to others and they don't necessarily know how to do that without asking black people to put in all the labor. Yeah.
Speaker: So it felt like a moment where I could just be more so on the front lines. It's like, if you don't know what you need to do, like here are books you can read and here's like podcasts you can listen to and things where you're not just like bothering your black friends because they're potentially feeling a lot. Like, you know, and everyone felt what they felt, but that was just, they don't call it the summer of range for nothing, you know? And there's been so much stuff that's come out about that summer.
Speaker: And I don't know if you are always looking for podcasts, but there's a podcast called Alphabet Boys that talks about how the FBI put a plant in the Denver area and was trying to rally up people. Yeah, I've heard about that. Now, there was a podcast that did that. I heard about that dynamic of that infiltration. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, you should check it out if you haven't, but yeah, I'm just, I don't know. And you had mentioned before, I do a lot of social justice work because I really just feel like
Speaker: all people in this country should have the same opportunities and life should not be made more difficult for them because of XYZ. And the bottom line is this country has very much hidden in its fabric all of these ways that we perpetrate harm and we don't even realize it. And I genuinely feel like people
Speaker: have good hearts. And I genuinely feel like sometimes people are just so stuck on tradition, and they've never asked questions, you know, about like, where does this come from? Or where is the origins of this? And, and, and I really do think that the thing that this country does well is keeping our, our citizens ignorant for their benefit, you know, and
Speaker: It's unfortunate. And with the work that I do, it's really just about finding power in ourselves and not so much relying on these exterior forces, these institutions to validate us. So that's what I do when it's a lot of unpacking and sometimes we cry a lot. Yeah. Well, no, I really appreciate really everything you had to say right there.
Speaker: yeah, of crying and release because it is a lot. I think when you were talking, I was thinking a lot about myself and doing the show and how about my learning through this because I've done the show for over four years.
Speaker: In a certain sense, a very real sense for myself, I don't even resemble the person I was when I started it. And I think the biggest change for me is the unraveling of my own, you know, quote unquote, education, right? Like I would consider myself like always on the right side of things, like in my own head, right? And other people would think so too, as a collective.
Speaker: unionist, and many other types of social justice work. But I felt in my learning recently that it still feels very much on the edge. And I come to the conclusion that
Speaker: there's a rotten core to this country that has to be worked out somehow. And there's a lot of opening in people asserting rights that always should have had them and enjoyed them. And there's a backlash, a huge conservative backlash against folks right now. And so it feels very real and raw, but one of the biggest things, and I had heard
Speaker: On one of your episodes, a reference to a fundraiser for murdered and missing Indigenous persons, women, girls, and two -spirits. And that was one of the learnings I've had on my show that I
Speaker: encounter, you know, I've done four or five episodes on that and was just really startled and really just did not know the history and the depth of the crisis. Same thing for residential schools. So a lot of what I do in the conversations that I have, the, the, the gift that's given to me and talking to you and other folks is that there's always an unraveling. And when you were talking about, you know,
Speaker: that rage and frustration that I think still has to be worked out from George Floyd in that time and inspired you to make art and become more active and figure out what to do. And I think we're all still trying to do that, but I just wanted to thank you for your work on that. And I just feel that connection to the question on Bruja and connecting it to some things I said related to
Speaker: colonialism. A thought that I've heard in your show is kind of
Speaker: this shaming or casting out with terms that can be used. And I began to think about threads that you have of, well, what is it for indigenous folks or thinking about the impacts of colonialism and thinking about things like Brujah and
Speaker: Well, I have to be clear, I don't consider myself an indigenous person. Lately, I've been saying I'm the descendant of indigenous people, because Mexico, being from Mexico, Mexico has such a high population of people who
Speaker: that those are radical challenges
Speaker: are. Their genetic makeup is a large percentage Indigenous, but I don't live of the lands that my ancestors came from. And I live in a country that is very
Speaker: at least the area that I live is very disconnected from my culture because there are parts of the United States that are very heavily influenced by the Spanish and all of that. But this is all to say like, I just feel like as a collective, there are so many issues that the indigenous people are going through collectively. You mentioned the effects of like residuals, the residential schools and obviously like the fact that
Speaker: women and girls have been like trafficked and you know, like, it's it's almost like they're for their property. And so the thing for me and like with my show is like with with re channeling, you know, that energy, I feel like I'm so I'm so educated on on the fact that all these magical practices
Speaker: come in some way or another from indigenous tradition. So it's kind of that thing that I see that people really love the aesthetics of the culture and the traditions and the beliefs and the practices and all of this. And they have no intention of getting back connected to source and actively seeking out directly how to do this. And I think a lot of that comes from
Speaker: not knowing, just not having the resources, you know. I really do feel, and maybe this is just me being
Speaker: Hopefully hopeful about humanity. I really do feel like a lot of people don't intend to cause harm or hurt or whatever But I really do think that they don't know where to even start with some of the research But with yes, I feel like ruhidia is like a form of fighting Colonialism because for a lot of people who are very disconnected Mexico again I'll give us an example like has so much influence of the
Speaker: African, like, traditional religions. It has so much influence from, like, the Spanish. It has so much influence from, like, the indigenous people. And it's all, you know, it's this culture. And in some places, you know, obviously, like, more in the northern, there's a lot of, like, Jewish influence. And depending on where you are in Mexico, the traditions are so different. And I think that regionally,
Speaker: all of these different people have traditions that they take part in. I want to recommend a book, if anybody hasn't checked it out, it's called Rucheria de Rancho, Mexican source city Rucheria de Rancho, and it's by Laura Davila. And it talks about how a lot of people, you know, they really just used what they had. And for a lot of people, it's like, okay, well, I have all these spices, or I have these chiles, or I have these things. And they figured out how to
Speaker: have little rituals and ideas and just to manipulate these items to be able to get this final result. And I think magic is really about using what you have.
Speaker: and really deeply just wanting it. It's almost like a form of prayer. With prayer, you really just put all your focus and energy into these thoughts, and it's the same thing. And I could argue that I think that the Catholics are the biggest witches, but I won't, because that's a whole different conversation. But yeah, I think it's about using whatever resources that connect you to yourself and to spirit.
Speaker: It's difficult because Brugeria is one of those things. Being a Brugia is to take all these different aspects of life, I guess, and manipulate them for good or bad. And I feel like there are tons of people who do malevolent magic. But there's also a lot of just non -witchy people who also wish for toxic people in their life or don't want for them to succeed.
Speaker: So, I don't know. I guess this is all to say, like, I'm trying to figure out ways to consciously manipulate my reality to make it happen for me. No, I, I, I really enjoy your explanation, but back, back to Catholicism. All right. I, you grew up to have the conversation. No, I grew up Catholic. You grew up Catholic. And when you had an, uh,
Speaker: in an episode um uh with the a gentleman done an extensive podcast on on the exorcist and uh hearing you talk about it i could hear in your voice and many people that i've known in their voice of that just completely scaring the shit out of them on some like deep and in in and fundamental way yeah um i was
Speaker: So fascinating. I haven't got through the maybe convention. It's escaping me right now, the name of the gentleman you had related to the Exorcist. And what a marvelous exploration. The one thing with the Exorcist is my dad had told me for decades to read the book. And he's not a big book reader. He was like, you got to read it. You got to read it. You got to read it.
Speaker: And I was like, yeah, and I'm reading everything. I read billions of books and I finally got around to it. And I adored the book. I found it deeply psychological, scary and everything. So everything around The Exorcist was just so freaky and magnificent to me. What about The Exorcist?
Speaker: I feel like this is like a shared experience that so many people had. I watched it and I was too young. Every time, every age is too young. Maybe, but I also feel like, cause I had to be somewhere around like seven, eight when I watched it. And I feel like it just deeply scared me on a level I didn't understand. And I always had a fear of like being possessed. I mean, like I guess maybe it's still there a little bit, but like for the most part, um,
Speaker: I think I've overcome that fear. But I just really find the idea of the need for an exorcism just terrifying. Like, it's just scary. And so I feel like that was always one of those films that stuck with me. It's funny, my
Speaker: I do do episodes in Spanish as well and I had one with my mom because my mom was terrified by the book and my mom was just like the movie was so lackluster like it was just so over the top like the book is terrifying the movie is just so and and
Speaker: Based on her personality, I get it. But it's just so funny to me that my mom was just like, it's mid. It's mid at best. But for me, it was so terrifying. And yeah, finding out later that all of those events happened from something that happened here was just like, oh, why am I so close to the puzzle?
Speaker: Yeah, that episode with Troy Taylor, if you know anybody is interested in like the work that I do or just kind of whatever, I highly recommend that episode. That's a good one. Yeah, yeah. The fact that he got to interview all of the key players, including the kid himself that he was, I mean, he was a grown man, but he passed probably in the last five years, I believe. So I don't know, I just always think that it's scarier when you can get to the source to the root of of everything. And
Speaker: In a place here like St. Louis, it's so very hush -hush and you'll hear about it. It was nice after hearing so many different people be like, oh, well, my mom or my grandfather's friend or whatever had a connection or stay near where the hospital was. It's the seven degrees of separation from Kevin Bacon. It's like that, the exorcist, the St. Louis exorcist.
Speaker: Yeah, that's um, yeah, it's it's it's and thanks for placing it over there by you in my head. Um
Speaker: I lived in Washington DC for a while in the Georgetown area where they show the film. So it's weird how maybe with the film or the book and everything around that, you're just going to end up placing it in different places. And even the beginning of the film is the extended out in the desert, I believe, of the film itself. So, yeah, St. Louis, huh?
Speaker: You know, it's funny, no one ever thinks to come here, which is a bummer because it has some some amazing things about it. But I recently went to Denver and I bought my flight separate because it was cheaper that way. And I got like a credit for like coming to St. Louis. I'm like, Oh, homie, I'm just coming back home. But
Speaker: Thanks for coming back home. Hey, I enjoyed my time in St. Louis. I don't pretend to know a lot about it, but it was very welcoming and I did it even without the voucher.
Speaker: We always like to joke that we are a baseball a baseball town with a drinking problem. Oh boy I've I've lived in Milwaukee, Wisconsin for a bit and there's some crossover there. I am very sure oh man, okay, um Something rather than nothing art and philosophy show Bex tell us your thoughts about what you think art is what is art? Oh
Speaker: I feel like art is any form of expression that has a need to connect with others. It's communication.
Speaker: Oh, definitely. I feel like, yeah, I mean, I think about how so many stories have stood the test of time because, like, they were oral, you know, traditions and fairy tales or, you know, like, leiendas or, yes, definitely. Like, I feel like it is because I also think that
Speaker: For example, the legend of La Llorona, that is art because it's been the muse to so many different films about it. There was recently this Guatemalan version of La Llorona that was amazing because it
Speaker: not to give anything away, but you find out that the spirit was indigenous and the violence that was inflicted on her and why she's pissed off. And it's just like, yes, this checks out, right? Beautiful film, highly recommended. I do think that communications is art, yes.
Speaker: Yeah, I like that and I love that with them and just a lot of the stories that we talk about and that we tell and especially in your show and again,
Speaker: with He's Spooky. It's nice to sit back and to listen to the art of storytelling. And I think with your background, with aspects of doing the technical pieces in creating that art, and then having the space to tell your own stories. And everybody, just so you know, Bex has
Speaker: a patreon of which i'm a patron on there with a lot of a lot of great stuff um so highly recommend that what what what is your name listed uh on the patreon
Speaker: I think it's Bex B casting. It's funny, I put my entire podcast catalog on there because I also, I don't know. I think that artists should be able to take back their work.
Speaker: if they don't feel like people are gonna appreciate it. And maybe I'm wrong, but that's the way that I feel about it. I also feel like y 'all didn't appreciate it the first time, let me take it back. And maybe if I decide y 'all are worthy, I'll give it back. I'm very much giveth and taketh away. But no, I am excited because one, I do feel like the show has more purpose now and I can sort of like pop up the episodes in a way that feel
Speaker: more authentic. Eventually, when I'm feeling everyone's deserving, I have a really great conversation with the founders of Fortaleza Tequila, which is the Sousa family after they sold the company in the 70s. Because Tequila is a small place, everyone knows everyone. My mom
Speaker: you know, was maybe like closer to 20 years older than Niermo, who is the founder. And so she has memories of him running around as a little kid, you know, they're great people, they make amazing tequila, please go and support if you haven't tasted it. It's tequila that's been made the same way it was made 150 years ago. So it's good stuff.
Speaker: incredible. One of the things I wanted to mention, I had it written down, a podcast that I've been on just recently did
Speaker: Short episode on agave which drops into some of the history there and that's the rooted podcast. You might enjoy that Really really cool episodes about plants their history and some of the cultural background to it All right, Bex. I want to jump I want to jump to something else. I want to tell you about it. I was just quickly on the Catholic piece and in ghosts I
Speaker: I grew up in Rhode Island, and there's a lot of Portuguese folks. I grew up around a lot of my friends in Portuguese. And it was always incredible to me the prominence of the miracle at Fatima for them, where under this miracle, or described to be a miracle, that Mary appears to these girls up on Fatima. And it was such a prominent thing. It was always displayed in all the homes there.
Speaker: and uh... always just kinda like resonate in my head like the ghostly aspects you know uh... of uh... of policies and of spirit and how central that is i'm sure we could do it an episode or two about that about that is as as a whole but when the when i've listen to your shows in her to come up this uh... i connected to elements of policies among is the spookiness and the second is actually
Speaker: My belief, if you look in the doctrine that comes out of the church when it comes to working people and stewardship of the environment, they're actually pretty radical statements. And it gets back to what it is that is actually a message within that's helpful of trying to stop the rampages of unfettered capitalism and respect working people.
Speaker: But so so anyways, there's there's pieces of me that like kind of like haunt me in that way that still like inform me And do you have that kind of relationship with it where it's like because of that deep familiarity of growing up with it You end up kind of having this weird fascination with it all. I it's interesting you mentioned that because I have been thinking a lot about
Speaker: reading all of the scripture, if you will, because it's been a long time. My mom used to do Bible school with us when we were kids, and I know that I didn't get the most out of it. She used a kid's Bible with the most terrifying imagery, but no, there are certain things I just can't leave.
Speaker: But I would like to argue the respect of the working people, but why do we have to be working at all? Because it benefits the Catholic Church if we are working, just as it benefits capitalism. But that's neither there. But because like we mentioned before, like my dad is a union guy and my dad is one of those people, he will be working forever. It's just ingrained in him, you know.
Speaker: And I think that a lot of people who have union jobs kind of have that same mindset. They have a hard time leaving. I think the need, well, for everyone to have respect in their workplace, right? But I feel like for union folk, their job becomes so much of their life. And so it's almost just like you really do need and should demand that respect because it's like you're giving so much of yourself.
Speaker: Was your father a union guy? No, my father wasn't. I don't come from a union tradition at all. My dad's kind of an independent, you know, smarter, I like painting the ass. I'll tell you one thing though about my dad, which is fascinating to me. My dad would always stick up for himself and his coworkers without any protections. Like I always viewed my dad like in retrospect as like a
Speaker: like in a non -union shop, the steward. I've looked at him that way. My uncle was a teamster. My gramps was a truck driver as well. So not direct, but around it enough. And it's so interesting how the culture of different jobs and what is accepted.
Speaker: Let me know if this is maybe something you don't relate to, but something that took me a while because my dad, like I said, he worked at the Ford plant and there was the union hall that was not that far from like where they worked. And it was just like a clubhouse for them. Like they would all go for drinks and stuff. And I'm like, wait, what? Like, yes. Yes. And so it's just like the culture, too. You know, it's it's it's very hard. It's hard labor. You know, you
Speaker: I have to give up a lot of yourself, your time with your family to really work and thrive in this environment. And I think that kind of like going back to like, it's because a lot of people have that mindset that the work is their life. And I wonder where that comes from, right? Because I very much, because being the artsy one in the family, I'm just like, I work to live, I don't live to work. And that's something I'm actively trying to,
Speaker: chip away at, you know, because I do think about like, you know, a lot of my ancestors, like, yeah, they had the the day to day, like, you know, things you have to do to like thrive and survive. But it's also like they had downtime, you know, and, and I don't feel like they necessarily felt guilty in the same way I feel guilty when I don't.
Speaker: Maybe they did, I don't know. Well, it's a deep conversation. And you mentioned about being the artist and seeing a different way to it. And I think it's been extremely strange for me in the sense of doing the union work. And I think I could say compulsively.
Speaker: excessively, but also with an eye towards breaking from that work in another identity or another part of myself, which is artistic. And for me, I know that's connected back. I know for me, intellectually, that's connected to
Speaker: Like the romantic aspects of Karl Marx has to do with the fact that our mind gets so polluted by the system, no matter what role we have within it. And he's talking about what humans are capable of doing.
Speaker: is writing amazing poetry of doing plays, of being productive workers, and not all frilly, but being true expressions of themselves. And that's, for me, where always the power was, because I keep talking to artists, and there's so much shit that's in the way.
Speaker: for everybody, right? Like, why do I feel weird for, for laying out in the sun for a half hour and obsess over it doesn't happen all the times. But what I why would I feel weird to begin with, like, you know, doing something that's good for myself, there's some, yeah, there's some really deep, deep issues in there. I appreciate that.
Speaker: Yeah, may we all be on learning the things that don't serve us, you know, oh my goodness. Yeah, so um Another question connected to art about the role of art. Um, I asked this recently in a sense of uh Times for a lot of people seem to be changed people uh with the the impacts of the environment climate change or
Speaker: or maybe even just within, you know, social issues, feeling more strained or politics being intense. Is art more important now or has the role of art changed or is art still, you know, arting? I think art is still arting. I think the thing that I
Speaker: I have a lot of sadness that a lot of people who create art can't do it on their terms because the reality is to be able to really commit your life to art and really make the art you want to make, you would need
Speaker: Someone to really sponsor you and like have you you know provide for your lifestyle and stuff and be like a patron the way that like Back in the days that they were and we have that you know I feel like I'm very fortunate that I have enough content that I can collect in a place like Patreon and people find my content worth paying for like that's amazing but I feel like for a lot of people they don't even have the time to slow down to make the art they want to make and
Speaker: And, you know, I'm always like rooting for the people who have this little side hustle art project and then it like blows up. There's a company here locally called Glam Goria.
Speaker: And they do horror bath bombs and lotions and just all of these fucking cute ass shit. They have this black Phillips spray that I absolutely love because it's very natural smelling. And that's the thing, I love vanilla. I'm a warm vanilla sugar bitch.
Speaker: bath and body works. I don't know if you know what that means. Oh, I sure do. But like, I love vanilla fragrance things. And theirs is like mixed with peppercorn. And it's just this very like, delicious, spicy, natural thing. And I'm just like, Oh, my God, I love this. And
Speaker: So yeah, but they they started as a sort of a side hustle thing and then they like blew up and now it's like her full time gig, you know, and I and I think that the thing is is that not everyone has the resources or the the time or sometimes even like the commitment because
Speaker: having to struggle with those other things in the hierarchy of like self actualization, you know, makes it more difficult. So I am very aware of that, because some people just don't have the time. But I think we should be grateful for the art that we're getting. But sometimes art for a lot of people seems like extra or like a commodity. And I really do think that it's it's a way of finding a way that, you know, your soul can communicate, if that makes sense.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah. I think any space we can talk about that and I've been inspired by others who talk about doing art really tied to mental health. I remember
Speaker: reading books early on is the basic message. You need to make your art or you need to be you. Your identity, who you are, your difference. I know with my identification as an artist, I think the weird -ass shit in my personality, I'm more comfortable with it. There's space for it. It's being like,
Speaker: I'm being an artist. I'm trying to express and it's a very strange dynamic, but that's, you know, going back into that identity piece, I guess I didn't ask you exactly. In referring to yourself as an artist, when was that moment when you said or you realized you're like, oh, I'm an artist.
Speaker: When I was like five and my parents gave me watercolors for the first time and I Opted to color inside of the closet. Ah I think that's when I realized I'm like risk taker. I'm a risk taker But it's a delicate it's a delicate type of paint
Speaker: uh yeah i remember very very little and i don't know and maybe that just describes me i've always just been someone who does what they're not supposed to do um maybe it's because it's more enticing i don't know uh you know and that isn't to say that like i'm out here like causing harm and painting in closets to this day or hurting people but i've just always been curious by what art is you know and and i think that like
Speaker: In my head, in my little five year old head, I was like, I want to see what this looks like in the closet, you know? And so like, I feel like my whole life has been like, I want to see how to make that happen.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, I uh, i'm hot off just seeing the premiere of the um into the spider verse Uh, uh And I gotta tell you just generally i'm not telling anything about this story. It's like it's like an art orgy like it is unbelievable like dripping paint cut -ins animation styles I was I walked out of there i'm like
Speaker: I want to at least come in contact with people who threw in on this magic. I walked out, I was like, holy shit, that was a massive brilliant film school experiment, but it's popular culture. I was pleased, is what I would say.
Speaker: I have to be honest, I am so out of the loop of superhero movies. I think the last Spider -Man I saw were the Tobey Maguire ones.
Speaker: Well, let me let me tell you this, Bex, just so you know, because it just just just as far as the aesthetics of these two movies that are that are animated. What was brilliant and what people really reacted to is that you would have the different art styles of these different types of spider men or spiders. Right. So you would have like a manga style one. You would have the new one.
Speaker: Spider -Man from like the 30s and they were integrated in the same spot and there's so much playing with Frames and like walls that are colored paint that reflect emotion. It's just this massive play with this With this animation that is just I just find that spellbinding, uh, you know visually so anyways that
Speaker: that I'm just coming off hot off that and I was like that was that was art fun like when we get down to it you know like art fun that makes sense yeah that's that's something that's definitely out of being so out of the loop that would be a lot more digestible I feel like I just put that on and smoke a bowl and like let's just watch this artistic masterpiece yeah I uh it made me think of um there was this movie loving Vincent which was I think still the only film that was
Speaker: painted individual paintings. So it was painted in the style of Van Gogh, the entire movie, and each still was an individual painting over like 200 ,000 paintings. Yes. So I haven't seen the film yet, but I am familiar with it and it's on the list of stuff to watch. Yeah. I think that I've always just enjoyed Van Gogh and so the idea that someone was making paintings of all of
Speaker: His paintings to make this whole story about him just sounds really cool. Yeah. You're a horror movie freak too, right? I do really enjoy horror movies. I mean, I like all different types of movies, honestly. Lately, I find myself so busy. I prefer to commit to a TV show because you can always check out. A film, you have to commit the long, ongoing experience. But yes, I do love movies, yeah.
Speaker: I really, really enjoy that. On the show recently I've had Susie Block from a series that was Horror in the High Desert and Blair Bathory talking a lot about a found footage. I love found footage horror. I completely trip out on that. Okay, big question Bex, big question. Why is there something rather than nothing?
Speaker: Because I've always been the person who believes that you should just know a little bit about everything versus nothing about nothing. And so I really believe that it makes you a more well -rounded person to know something rather than nothing about anything. How does that phrase go? A jack of all traits and a master of none? Yeah. But people always forget.
Speaker: It ends with, it's better to be a master of many or than a master of one or something like that, or to know of many than be a master of one. It's something like that. And I just think about that a lot, because there are so many people,
Speaker: who decide like, I'm going to do this one thing. You know, I'm going to be a doctor or whatever. And maybe they're very well -rounded and they know so much about so many other things, but I feel like sometimes there aren't those people, you know? There's the people who just like, this is it. And I'm just like, you know, I find it so amazing that people are so fascinated by medicine.
Speaker: and make it their whole life, but I could just never be that type of person that only knows about one thing. On that point, Bex, I really connect to that. I think it's curiosity. Even just chatting with you, I really appreciate the ability to
Speaker: to drop around to quite a few topics that we do. But it was even a philosopher's quote that just kind of stuck in my head because it's the opposite of me. And I never saw it as a goal, but I understand what he's saying. Soring Kierkegaard said, the purity of heart is to will one thing.
Speaker: And that was very much in a spiritual sense, in a religious sense. So I've always been thought about that as like, what is it to will one thing? Like I understand the power of it and the passion within it. But my brain, like I would just say that my brain is not even structured for that enterprise. So I've always been fascinated by it. And I think it's kind of what we're talking about is like, you know, that curiosity where
Speaker: you can go deep and then move on to something else and go deep. And I think it's just so fun to do. That's why I keep doing it. And I'm sure that's why you keep doing it too. It is. And I wanted to, so the full phrase, I looked it up cause I was just like, well, how does it go? Yeah. Jack of all trades is a master of none, but oftentimes better than a master of one. And I do relate to that because I feel like, you know,
Speaker: Where I'm at now, I've been very fortunate to plant a lot of seeds and a lot of different aspects of my life and my career because I did radio for so long. And then I was like, I never want to just feel like it could all be ripped out from under me. And that's sort of how I felt after that experience. And so I started sort of like looking into just magic stuff just as a hobby. And I started editing like podcasts.
Speaker: sort of as a hobby at first and then like, you know, it became like a skill and then, you know, with the spiritual stuff that I was doing, the witchy things that I was learning, like I,
Speaker: ended up creating a tarot deck and then started being a tarot reader. Sometimes I travel and do events or I also will read at shops. What this is all to say is I've just been able to have all of this knowledge and so many different things that at first it felt so
Speaker: like hindering to me. Because especially when I would work, look for work, even though all of these skills were like transferable, they'd be like, but you've only really done this before. And then, and then the problem became, oh, well, you've done a lot of different things. So we don't understand you, right? Yeah. Yeah. So I, it's, uh,
Speaker: I don't know, I feel like in just being authentic to myself and just being like, I'll figure it out. You know, I've always had my back, whether whether I make the best decisions at times, and we have to face the consequences, that's neither here nor there. But I've always been able to figure it out. And I'm very fortunate in that aspect. Because, you know, I've had friends who have lost jobs and just been without work and just
Speaker: been sometimes by choice because you do need that time to decompress, but, you know, just been very impacted by like, I don't really know what my next step is. And I guess I'm in a place where right now I'm just like, well, what do I want to do? Cause I have a lot of options. Yeah. That's a nice feeling sometimes, you know, when you, especially when going for so long feeling like, do I have any skills that are beneficial? And sometimes it just takes time, you know, to really appreciate,
Speaker: Well and display them you know as an artist who is to display them out because you know that the that that they're worthy right and so when you know that you put them out and Yeah, it's great to hear you talk about Tara. I have found the standard tarot deck along been fascinated. I have two other interest index one is Garbage pail garbage pail kids I shouldn't be surprised, but that's awesome you actually
Speaker: It's everything, if you appreciate these things, it's everything you would want it to be. The other one I have, which is just gorgeous, actually probably the most gorgeous deck I've ever seen, Aisha Frost, and she had done this book, Indigenous Healers, called You Are the Medicine.
Speaker: And the cards that came out of this were designed by Steph Littlebird. And I got to tell you, this deck is just plain beautiful. And it's embedded within the book in the concept that you are the medicine within you. Within you. And it's obviously more complicated than that. But within you, you have the ability to heal yourself and others. So I actually saw that deck that I just mentioned.
Speaker: by Frost and Little Bird at Barnes and Noble the other day. So maybe folks can pop around and see it. So love that tarot deck.
Speaker: Oh, my God, it sounds beautiful. And I think that that's something I'm fortunate that, you know, I think we're all fortunate to have is so much more access to things. You know, I think about when I was younger and if you wanted to get a tarot deck or this or that, it was going to be less likely to be at, you know, your local bookstore. It was going to be at like a little grimy metaphysical shop and metaphysical shop. Yeah.
Speaker: And you probably had to dig around, you know, in the books and try and find something. And, you know, I do love that people are in whatever way they they feel fit, you know, trying to seek out things that help give them purpose or power or what have you, because I feel like it's it's important to figure out what connects you to not only yourself, but to the world around you. And it's different for different people. Yeah, well put.
Speaker: Bex, everybody, Bex Carlos here. Bex, where do folks find you? Find your stuff. And I know, given our previous conversation just now, there's different spots to look, but tell folks how to encounter you, your art, tarot, et cetera.
Speaker: Yeah, so if you are interested in working with me, I am a podcast editor or producer. I do a bunch of different audio work. So if you have a store to tell, I can probably help you tell it. You can find that information on my website. I also do tarot readings, virtual ones. So if you're ever interested in that, by all means, that's on my website as well, schedule an appointment.
Speaker: My podcast, Tuttia Bruja is pretty much everywhere that you find podcasts. You can find me on Instagram. I have my own personal page, which is like Bexby casting, but most of these days I'm on the Tuttia Bruja page. I'm on TikTok and I feel like I don't know if you TikTok, but I kind of like it because you can learn so much and it's like the safe space in a sense to like just trauma dump.
Speaker: And I feel like that's sort of great about it. Like, I have a friend who, her mother was Betsy Fourier, and she was
Speaker: murdered in really unfortunate circumstances. They made like an NBC show about it. I really don't want to say the murderer's name, but like, she has found a lot of power. My friend Mariah, like she posts a lot about just the process of healing, you know, because I
Speaker: to have to suffer such a horrifying like crime committed against your family and like the after effects and you know that's one thing about true crime that really boggles me is like people will watch and learn and do all this stuff right and
Speaker: to learn more about the case, and then they have no compassion for the people who experienced it, which is such a shame. But I think that's something about society as a whole. But yeah, you can follow me in all those places. Follow Mariah. Yeah, thank you again for having me on, Ken. This has been such an amazing time.
Speaker: Yeah, I really appreciate you, Bex, and what you do. Love the podcast and thanks for eSpooky for bringing Bex on and just great stuff. Everybody, look, you can support Bex and eSpooky and other artists mentioned. Both have
Speaker: Patreons is a good way to get great content, early content, special content for these shows and an affordable way to support your work. So keep doing what you're doing, Bex. Really appreciate being able to talk about labor, Catholicism, art, your work, audio, storytelling, et cetera, a real joy.
Speaker: Yeah, talking about unions, all of it. Loved it. Great job. Thank you again. Thanks so much, Bex, and hope we chat soon. This is something rather than nothing.
