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4x4x48 Challenge Debrief
136 Plays3 years ago
K and I sit down to process and reflect on our 4x4x48 Challenge experiences. We ran 4 miles every 4 hours for 48 hours on behalf of VETS (Veterans Exploring Treatment Solutions) at the Warrior Angels Foundation fundraiser to raise money for psychedelic-assisted therapy.
This event was so powerful in many ways: physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, socially. While we know we can't fully articulate just how transformational it was, we hope this episode gives a glimpse into what it was that everyone contributed to, supported, and helped make happen.
We raised over $11k which is enough for 3 humans to receive life-saving grants through VETS.
Human life is the ultimate form of currency we operate in.
Much love.
Bill + K
https://vetsolutions.org/
https://warriorangelsfoundation.org/waf-overview/
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Transcript
00:00:01
Speaker
Hello. Hello. How you doing?
Introduction to the 4x4x48 Challenge
00:00:06
Speaker
Great. Is there more? So we're going to talk about the four by four by 48. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. Just wanted to make sure.
Fundraising for Veterans
00:00:24
Speaker
Um, so it was a fundraiser we did.
00:00:28
Speaker
Yeah, the 4x4x48 where that came from though was like, that's David Goggins challenge. And I believe it's always like this one weekend. I mean, you could do it whenever you want, but that weekend of March 3rd, I think historically that's what he's launched it as and people can kind of do it globally, which is a neat idea that people are doing it at the same time.
Details of the Challenge
00:00:51
Speaker
Yeah, really cool.
00:00:52
Speaker
Yeah. We did have Toby on when he, one of our friends, clients, people, he had done it last year. So some people might remember that. But it's essentially running four miles every four hours for 48 hours, which also happens to be 48 miles. That is true. That's what the math turns out to be. 12 times four. But we did it.
00:01:21
Speaker
Yeah. So we did it. Well, we did it separately before we get into what we did and our experience and stuff.
Surpassing Fundraising Goals
00:01:30
Speaker
Want to take a minute to acknowledge everybody who contributed to our fundraiser. We raised over $11,000, which is gnarly and kind of mind blowing. Uh,
00:01:48
Speaker
Our goal was $7,000. Our goal was $7,000. To be honest with you, the real goal was $3,500 because we raised money for vets, veterans exploring treatment solutions, which is the nonprofit that I worked through to go on my psychedelic retreat. And
00:02:14
Speaker
Around $3,500 is what, generally speaking, it's going to look like or be, and obviously things are whatever, different things. But nonetheless, that's what one person. That's one veteran. I would be sending one veteran. Yeah. So that was kind of like, hey, if we can send one person, if we could use our network, our people, our whatever to send one person, that would be really awesome.
00:02:41
Speaker
So obviously you set the goal at 7,000 and we hit that. We hit that and then we exceeded it. And at the end of the day or week or month or whatever it was, we raised, let's see the exact number, like $11,100. So now we've been able to send three. So that's three human beings. Three people. Yeah, which is awesome. And that's not only three lives.
00:03:05
Speaker
It's their family, their community. But a lot of people contributed and we're super grateful. Without further ado, thank you. So I'm going to read everybody and everybody does deserve another online. So Amber Capone, Sarah Jane Murray, Ben Allen,
00:03:23
Speaker
John Bender, Becky Johnson, Tim Chan, Edda, Kevin Brannon, Brooke Bendick, Becky, Mom and Dad, Lucas M, Grace J, Kelly R, Pat F, Mark D, Rachel and DJ, Chris Hinshaw, Kara Omar,
00:03:47
Speaker
Rachel Z, Lorena Weber, Dana Slade, Mark and Christy, Lauren Marciano, Adam Mateo, Brian Combias, Eric S, Kate Diadido, Jane Lee, Adrian, Michelle Picker, Jess Gallo, Mel, Katie and Diego, Charles Yack, Teague, Soli, Abby, Chuck and Amy, Ben, Angelo,
00:04:15
Speaker
Pamela, Elena, Lynn and Stefan, Laney, Caroline Kale, Michelle Mankat, Christian G, Luther Elliott, Kaitlyn Fabian, Kieran, Greg Rude, Mike Moran, Christina K, Raquel, Andrea Smith, Ali Grisob, Heidi McLean, Lauren Satone, Kevin Som, Melissa Reed, Jen Johy, Jen Berman, Tommy,
00:04:43
Speaker
Jeep Bryant, Grace, Dan Kay, Brad V, Noam Kay, Vijay Kay, Mike L, Paige G, and a bunch of anonymous folks. Which I know, Stacy, my dad and Veronica. Amazing. And there's people who I know are anonymous that
00:05:07
Speaker
that our list is anonymous and then thank you. So to each and every one of you, thank you because without you all, this would not have been the success that it was and that really reached us and I don't know, I mean, that fueled me. I know there's specifically one run where my intention was to just, you know, feel that.
Collaborations for Veteran Support
00:05:32
Speaker
So this event,
00:05:35
Speaker
the fact that what we did, where we went, why we signed up a couple months ago, I guess, vets had put up that they were going to be weeks, not months, weeks, I guess, a month, that they were doing this event.
00:05:53
Speaker
And, you know, we were thinking like doing it at home, I guess we'd like to do it and raise some funds. And so we said, you know, we posted that we were doing it. And the next thing we know, they reached out Amber and Marcus and asked if Bill would kind of represent them at this actual event being held in Houston, which of course we were super honored and
00:06:17
Speaker
agreed to. So the event was a couple of different organizations all coming together. And the main goal there is raising funds, awareness, support to help veterans all in the spaces with psychedelic healing.
00:06:36
Speaker
So some of the other organizations that were there, Warrior Angels. It's a Warrior Angels. Andrew and Adam are two brothers. One was a Green Beret, one was an Apache pilot. They founded Warrior Angels Foundation. And they hosted it. And they hosted it. Their ranch in
00:06:53
Speaker
Texas, outside Houston, and really demonstrated true leadership of bringing people together to elicit change. And that's what leadership is in a nutshell. And within the veteran nonprofit space, that's not always the case. There's quite a bit of territorial markings.
00:07:21
Speaker
And they were like, fuck that. We're going to bring everybody together. You know? And so they were sort of the, we'll say the, the head, the host organization they brought together. That's obviously heroic hearts. Um, so, uh, special operations, something or other. Um, and then, uh, and then a handful of other, you know, there was different brands, individuals and people that were all, but they really did an amazing job of,
00:07:51
Speaker
kind of inviting the right people who all had a common goal and open hearts, open minds to everything. So that was our intent to go and we decided,
Bill's Personal Experience
00:08:05
Speaker
yeah, I guess that I would, or the decision was I was going to run here.
00:08:09
Speaker
do it kind of on my own at home and then be able to volunteer, kind of not have both of us just in the event, but sort of be part of it in all aspects. So I did it here and then we went there. So you did it a week before. Yeah. So you did it about two weeks ago now. Yeah. And so one of the things that you were sort of concerned about was your heel, your foot.
00:08:39
Speaker
Right. So I've had a heal thing since really since the middle of my iron man training hasn't gotten terrible. It's gotten pretty bad. It's gotten better, kind of comes and goes, but you know, that consistent running, you know, for 48 miles in a short amount of time was a bit of a concern and I didn't, you know, I didn't know how that was going to go. So, right. So how did it go for you? It went great. Um,
00:09:06
Speaker
I mean the event, my heal was fine. Somehow it actually hurt the least it's ever hurt after I ran 48 miles, which I'm still not, I just don't know anything about the human body I think at this point. But yeah, it was really kind of a perfect situation because what ended up happening is a lot of the people, a handful of people who you just listed who were able to support us with donations, they also were able to join me on the run.
00:09:36
Speaker
I kind of put out there that these are the times I'd be running. This is where I'd be doing it. And if anybody wanted to join a very slow pace, they would be, you know, I'd love that. And I actually had someone join me on every run with the exception of like three to include the 10 PM, the two AM, not just the convenient ones. I was going to say, yeah, which is huge. And that just made it like, yeah, it just, it, for me, it was,
00:10:04
Speaker
kind of putting my hand up and saying like, I need support, which isn't something that I always do. Um, I felt like it was good. People felt included part of something. Um, Kara wants to, you know, maybe do this next year or later this year for her own reasons. So, um, yeah, it was, it was really, it was definitely an inconvenient challenge. Yeah.
00:10:35
Speaker
And for me, um, that was a good, that
Overcoming Challenge Difficulties
00:10:40
Speaker
was a good thing for me to experience. Um, but yeah, it was inconvenient about it because I mean, let's just go down. Like you said it was inconvenient. What, what for you is inconvenient? Yeah, definitely the, the night stuff. Okay. Animal doesn't operate at the night. I don't do well at night. So,
00:11:03
Speaker
Yeah, just like, you know, I like to finagle the number, do the things well, figure it out. Okay. If I add two here and then add two there, and then I get an extra, you know, I like just like, I like to go through these scenarios of
00:11:22
Speaker
You know, like for example, if it wasn't run every four hours, I'd be like, well, I'll add two extra miles to the four p and then I'll two extra miles here and then I'll add one there and then I don't have to run at night. And there's a lot of like manipulating that happens to make it to 48. You would have algebra and it's not like I don't want
00:11:48
Speaker
to do challenging things. That's like a weird thing with me where I do put myself in a position of challenging things, but then mentally I start to doubt myself, right? Like make changes because what if I can or, you know, I project and, but for this, it was like, there's no way around
Balancing Life and the Challenge
00:12:06
Speaker
it. It's four miles every four hours. Like that's the point. Yeah. Because you've done, um, well, I mean you did your 12 hour thing a year ago.
00:12:16
Speaker
But that was, I feel like, kind of what you're talking about a little bit, where it was hard. But I set all the conditions. But that's what I mean. It was like, nothing to do that day, just walk. And it was kind of like, OK, this was, I also had life. It was on a Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. And while you did the four by four.
00:12:41
Speaker
Yeah, so I didn't cancel every session at the gym. I didn't tell everybody in our life, I will be just in my own tent outside and don't bother me. I still had to walk the dog, all that stuff. It was an opportunity. What was cool was that every four hours, there was an opportunity to zoom back in and bring the focus back.
00:13:06
Speaker
And I really got a lot out of that because one of the things we've talked about is recently I've noticed a little escalation in my anxiety, which is probably coming from the long task list I have for myself and just doing more and more and more and more.
00:13:22
Speaker
And so that was like a 48 hour period of kind of, I really actually didn't do, I did the bare minimum for work and life. And then I focused on going out and running and it was just one thing. So for 48 hours or whatever, not 48 hours for those 12 hours that there was just one singular focus. And that was really, that was really cool. You also ate very well. I did.
00:13:53
Speaker
I had, I may have had a whole fuel plan. Um, yeah, I did want to feel good. So I wanted to feel like, you know, I wasn't, I wanted to finish and feel good. And I've done some events now where I did not feel good. Yeah. Like my iron man, you know, I definitely messed up that fuel plan a little bit and it totally different scenario, but yeah. Um, I wanted to say hydrated.
00:14:23
Speaker
So it was good. I really though didn't, I don't think I relied that much like I had in my plan to have quite a few more cinnamon buns than I actually did. Did you feel physically prepared, like speak to your preparation about your event?
00:14:43
Speaker
Well, I think I've had I over the past let's say two years from doing the half Ironman doing You know my event and doing it in Ironman training. I think my
00:14:57
Speaker
my foundation was pretty solid. And by that, I don't just mean like, you know, I've built up that good base of like zone two, which takes time, which takes time, but also my ligaments, my joints, like my body has been used to. Right. So that in that scenario, I felt
00:15:19
Speaker
prepared. It was like the heel was the only thing now. Yeah. Was I running fast? No. If I was going to say, Oh, I want to run each of these four miles in, you know, at like an eight minute mile pace, like no, that I don't know that I was, I would have been prepared for that. Right. But to run and complete all of them running and feel good. Yeah. I felt prepared. Yeah. Yeah. So that was, that was
00:15:47
Speaker
Good. It was, it was kind of funny though, because any of these things were sort of on your own. Like I did the last one by myself at the park and it was nice. It was 10 AM. It was like a mild day and it was good to finish it out on my own.
00:16:04
Speaker
but you kind of like stop and you're like, all right, well, that's it. I'm going to go home. Yeah, exactly. That is like the forest company. I think I'm done running. Um, yeah, but I felt proud of myself for showing up and doing it. I felt,
00:16:28
Speaker
I definitely connected throughout that challenge to something that was far bigger than my own intention. So, you know, Iron Man, that was about me. This wasn't, this felt different and not that one's right or wrong, but just, I felt like the 2 AM, the 10 PM, like there wasn't, I didn't have a high degree of like feeling sorry for myself to get up and go. It was like, this is important. This is for something bigger.
00:16:57
Speaker
This is a small token to get up and go start moving my legs. And I definitely felt a gratitude for having, like on a lot of the runs that I thought about just, it just kind of floated into my mind, like.
00:17:14
Speaker
that by me running or moving my body or whatever, this was part of us raising funds to help people. And so when you look at being able-bodied and what is the freaking point of all your fitness, it's great that there's a purpose for it that it can do more good than just some accomplishment.
00:17:43
Speaker
Yeah, I was impressed by your, you only had one real span of hours, you know, where it was like, not to say you, you certainly weren't having a meltdown, but it was getting to you. No, I was a little irritable, a little agitated, tired. Yeah.
00:18:04
Speaker
Yeah, you, you know, I was impressed by your positivity. I was impressed by your, um, I was impressed by people coming and obviously running with you. That was really amazing to see. Uh, and I was also impressed by you continuing to do life, you know, down in Houston, it was, we went, we, we, we removed ourselves from our daily life and we're at a, at a, at an event.
00:18:32
Speaker
to weave this into your daily life. I remember Toby actually talking about that was one of his goals as well. He wanted to still be a dad. I was like, man, I have a lot of respect for that. Yeah. I think they're all different. There's one part though that could say you're not thinking about running all the time. Down in Houston, you're running like, all right, well, four hours, three hours till we run again. Not that you were just sitting around waiting around,
00:19:02
Speaker
you know, there is a little distraction, which I'm not saying it's bad, but you know, there's different things. So that was, it was cool to have that experience. I would, I think what's awesome about that challenge
00:19:15
Speaker
is it's very approachable for people. Even if you have to walk four miles, you can get it done with plenty of time. So no matter what your ability, your running ability, any of that, you could rock it. You can cover four miles and you could do it 12 times. So it is kind of a neat challenge that I would encourage people if they're toying with the idea
00:19:45
Speaker
to do. And I think that is one of the messages that I will certainly tip my cap to Goggins about that he does say of like, look, do what you can do. You can do something. And I think then that's, well, that's a refreshing statement. It doesn't have to be the sub seven minute, like go hard, you're as hard as possible.
Personal Growth and Community Involvement
00:20:14
Speaker
And it's cool that you did it, one, I mean, mad respect for doing it just on your own without, not to say it's easy, but like it's easy to go do an event and a race and a thing when you feed off of the energy of others. Sure. I shouldn't say it's easy, but there's an energetic boost to that when you're in the environment, when you've got other people doing it. Everybody knows that. You did it here. Yeah, that's kind of anticlimactic.
00:20:40
Speaker
a little bit. But that's really cool. I have a lot of respect for that too. And it's nice that you also... What I saw too is it mattered that you did it. It wasn't just like stubborn, hard-headed, no, I'm going to do this. It was, I really want to do this. Yeah, I genuinely wanted to. I was excited. And then you had that
00:21:06
Speaker
we had, you know, you had that experience also to then kind of go into Houston, right? Where you're doing, where you're, where you were volunteering, you know, kind of half and half, um, as needed, which is, which is really cool too. You know, like, Hey, all hand, like, you know, a sweep to sheds, like what is there? What do you mean? You know, I like to say like above nothing. And not to say you were, you know, sweeping out the porta johns or anything, but like,
00:21:34
Speaker
Yeah, just there to support. So that was, I finished that on a Wednesday. We had a weekend and then we left the next week for the actual event. Yeah.
00:21:48
Speaker
And that was, we had gone back and forth whether I would go because, you know, currently our situation when we leave, that leaves the gym, intended to, but we really decided that this was an important thing for both of us for many reasons to do together. Yeah. And appreciative that, you know, our folks over at BTE, like, I mean, it's kind of part of the model.
00:22:12
Speaker
Yeah, they were full support of like, of course go nobody was had a complaint that like, well, Friday, there's not going to be classes. And also, you know, obviously, not to forget to mention that vets, you know, sent us they paid for our trip, which was amazing.
00:22:31
Speaker
Um, so very grateful for that. And yeah, so we got down there, um, got to the ranch on Friday and it is funny. We didn't know, we'd never met anybody there. We talked to Adam on zoom, you know, but, um, but what's really interesting about that is I never even thought about that. Like I didn't have any moment of like, Ooh, we don't know anybody here. It was just like felt like you were, I mean, I didn't at least, it was just really,
00:23:02
Speaker
there wasn't any anxiety about who was going to be there. The people, it just felt like a good situation and right away just meeting people and you kind of felt like whoever was there was meant to be there and it was all a positive. Right. Yeah, that was definitely... I never thought about that actually either until right now. Obviously I knew we didn't know anybody, but
00:23:30
Speaker
It wasn't like a barrier. No, it wasn't like, oh my God. Adam sent an email about a week prior saying, hey, part of the challenge. It was like one of the bullet points. It was one of the bullet points. I will say this about Adam and Andrew. But I think Adam was the one who, it was from his email account. But anyway. Well, the bullet point said. But I'm just going to say,
00:24:01
Speaker
they did a great job like in the lead up. Oh yeah. Yeah. Very thorough. Thorough. I'm going to like nerd out on it because they had like weather and light data, which is like, well, when you're running all night that, I know what I'm saying, how easy, but like weather and light, but it was called weather and light data, which is like the thing. And so it was like, okay, good. This is what you're dealing with when you're dealing with this caliber. Not that, not that if, you know, not that you,
00:24:29
Speaker
No, it was just an example of it was very thorough, very preparing people. But the bullet point, which was funny because what it said was bone broth. Now up until this point, my thinking was like, I was very focused on fuel. Okay. We're going to get to like a whole foods. The problem is you typically won't think about it until you're there. Yeah. And then you'll be like, Oh crap, I need Skittles. And then you will need it and it'll be bad. And it's a mess. Yeah.
00:24:58
Speaker
So I was going to support this effort by preparing. OK, what do we need to bring? What do I need to bake? What do we need to buy? And then you have to figure out where the whole food, all these things. So many logistics. Then this bullet point appeared, and it said bone broth will be provided. We encourage people to only
00:25:22
Speaker
you know, use the only drink bone broth, but if you need additional fueling, please provide it. So it was very clear to us when we both read that, we're like, Oh, okay. So we're not having other feel like we're doing this. So in your mind, I think it was like kind of, which is kind of fucked up, like a relief, like, Oh good. I don't have to think about any feeling. I'm just gonna do bone broth. Well, in my mind it was,
00:25:50
Speaker
Hmm, I need to be careful how I word this. In my mind, it was like, okay, good, these are my people.
00:25:58
Speaker
Yeah, because inherent in that is a minimalist kind of just do the work, don't get bogged down in all the frills kind of thing. And it's not, again, I don't want to come off sounding like a raging asshole or an elitist because I don't want to because I don't think that's the way I am. But there's a lot of
00:26:23
Speaker
talk and hoopla and whatever about the nutrition and about the fueling and about this and about that. I mean, people fuel for a fucking five. Yes. There's appropriate times for that where it is, it is critical to have a good experience. It would be stupid not to, but there's also the going over the people with the belts with the goo and the stuff and you're running for 20 minutes. So understood. And it was kind of a nice like, okay, like kind of,
00:26:51
Speaker
It alleviated, I think, a little bit of that pressure on just another thing to be like, oh, focused on. And for me, where there was relief was that it wasn't about performance. Now, if I was trying to maintain sub-8 minutes or sub-9 minutes or whatever, then you need to fuel. There's going to be a point where food and fueling is going to basically make or break you.
00:27:13
Speaker
but that was not my intention going in. So for the fueling thing, it was like, look, and it wasn't like, it was just like, it was, I liked it. It was an invitation too. I thought it was a well done that it was just an invitation as like another element if you chose to partake in it. So for us, we decided we were going to do that. And I think that was really, you know, I'm super glad we did. I've never fasted. I've probably tried a couple of things here and there and I get four hours in and I'm like, this is stupid.
00:27:42
Speaker
That's it. So, you know, for us, we kind of decided that's what we're going to do. Electrolytes, of course, we were going to allow like coffee, tea, but just no food. Yeah, no coffee for me. I'm still off coffee. Me coffee. I think I had one or two cups of tea and I had element electrolytes and I had some liquid IV and water. Yeah.
00:28:09
Speaker
That was, I think, to get into just that for a second, for both of us, like a really, an added element that I didn't, I don't think I thought about it. I mean, I knew, I know people who fasted, like, of course there's a spiritual component, all that stuff, behavioral, like there's a lot of value to it, but I hadn't put a lot of thought into it. I was like, okay, I was curious about how I was going to go. But, you know, I think in particular for you,
00:28:37
Speaker
I mean, I covered 22 miles with you. You did 48 and obviously ran some really fast ones and whatever. But so for me, it wasn't so much there wasn't like the physical piece there anyway, but
00:28:52
Speaker
I think for you it was such a great opportunity to have like something else not just perform because for you and you've spoken about it here and you know we know this another performance metric type of event is like not that valuable for you at this point.
00:29:14
Speaker
I don't think. So in this, it was like this deeper element of like, okay, being curious about it, how do I feel? There was like that, I felt at least some like clarity, some focus, some sort of, yeah, just not being distracted by food or, I don't know, it was definitely an interesting experience.
00:29:39
Speaker
a little bit of discomfort, fatigue, like having to work through those things without just destroying yourself physically. But they were also, I also found, um, I also found the fasting and the being hungry, a component. Well, the fasting and the being hungry was, um, a mechanism to just move into acceptance. And it's like, I am hungry.
00:30:10
Speaker
I have not eaten stating factual things, but not having it be anything more than it is. I'm hungry, period. I haven't eaten anything, period. Not the runaway story of what this means and what this and what that's like, just accept what it is. And that I think is a big thing as well as, you know, it could go the other way too of
00:30:38
Speaker
Well, I haven't eaten anything, so therefore I have to bop, bop, bop. Is that necessarily true? It did add an element. It certainly, I think, for me, it added a spiritual element as well. One of the pieces that made it, I think, helped with my success at least was
00:30:59
Speaker
Being in that environment, there really wasn't a lot of food around. I think it's certain, I would like to do a fast more regularly. I think it would be, for me personally, a lot more challenging to do it at home.
00:31:12
Speaker
with that environment. So it was a really unique opportunity. So that was that. I mean, like I said, I didn't do, I did less than half of what you did, but, um, the fatigue wasn't so much as just sort of the, and it wasn't like, I mean, you felt that drain towards the end, but the last three, well, no, the last two or the
00:31:41
Speaker
What is it? We was 12. So I think probably nine, 10 and 11. So that would have been 2am, 6am, 10am. But not the last one. 10pm, 2am, 6am. Yeah. 10pm, 2am, 6am. Which is the hardest ones. The 10pm that last night is tough. Yeah. But then there was the ceremony. So there was, and we'll talk about that in a second, but that 10pm one was sort of a little,
00:32:10
Speaker
The 10 into two was a little off schedule because of the thing, but, um, the six am, you were feeling it. I definitely felt the same. Yeah. I was like, okay. And you know, it was, it was like the muscles just didn't have any real elastic. Well, yeah, there wasn't anything.
00:32:27
Speaker
So I was like, okay, whatever. Um, but yeah, so for me, you know, I ran 10 of them, I think walked two of them or nine and three. Um, I walked one of them. Um, so, so a big thing to, that was also part of it was a, we were guided spiritually through the event.
00:32:54
Speaker
from our Native American brothers and sisters. And so they had Chief Phil, I think from the Lakota tribe and a couple others that he is part of. And more or less before every run, they would do a prayer at a ceremony and he would say something, which this guy is awesome.
00:33:24
Speaker
And so one of them, he talked about it being about with being with other people. So find two or three other people and stick together. And the two or the three other people that I was with, one of them, his foot was like plantar fasciitis was setting in and it was like probably going to be his last four miles.
00:33:48
Speaker
And so we just walked. And that's what it was about. I said to you, if I put my music in, earphones in, look at the ground and run and beat everybody, then I fucking failed miserably. That's not what it's for me. That's not what it was about. It was about
00:34:12
Speaker
um, connection being open, uh, you know, talking to people sharing in that, you know, and there was some amazing people to do so and not for leverage or anything else, but because we're coming together to heal and to move forward. And so, you know, that was really, that was really an amazing thing. And I appreciated that, um, that out of it. And then probably seven in, I think my,
00:34:43
Speaker
my calf, my left calf started to give me some issues and I felt like a massive cramp coming in, possibly a strain, I don't know. So I just kind of slowed down a little bit and then the next duration, the next four milers, I walked and then the one after that, I was like, well, let me see. And it was fine. So I was like, right on.
00:35:06
Speaker
So from a physical standpoint, it was certainly challenging. It was certainly challenging, but it was not crippling. And I didn't want to be crippled either. I did haul ass on the one though. Yeah, that's cool. Which was cool. The first night one, I had my headlamp on. It was like 90% humidity, 80 degrees out there. And when you hit the light,
00:35:34
Speaker
you're in this like Star Wars kind of tunnel like thing. And I did put music in there. I knew folks were going to be a little bit more timid on the trail, just because it was dark and the trail was hard. So I figured, you know, there would be some space. And I just kind of went with however I felt and I had like,
00:35:57
Speaker
I had, you know, sort of this connection to past people and spirit and everything like that. And I wasn't, I was by myself. I knew I'd probably be by myself running, but I wasn't running by myself. And I just was like, yeah, I feel good. And I ripped it. And then I got back and I was like, Oh shit, that was a little, that was a little too fast. Um, but that was, that was also part of it. You know, so.
00:36:26
Speaker
Yeah, each iteration had its own experience, which was cool. I was glad I got to do something with you. Yeah, that was cool. Yes, it was a camp situation, which was also very minimal. I mean, you're not sleeping a lot. That was fine. And there was some cool music to get us up.
00:36:48
Speaker
you know, have sort of whenever you have an experience and there's music with it. Now it's cool cause there's that you hear that music and you get that feeling. Um, yeah. So the ceremonies,
00:37:00
Speaker
I mean, we talked with each person had their own, whether it was their own experience, their people who were veterans who had had an experience with healing experience with psychedelics, whether it was scientist type people, political figures who are helping get this stuff going. It was just awesome to have the opportunity to meet people like this.
00:37:29
Speaker
And yeah, just made some incredible connections and a lot of time, there was no rush, that was awesome too, just to chat and there was no urgency to wrap up the conversation or get on to the next thing. There were some great people doing recovery stuff and got to talk to them. But the ceremonies, there were two kind of big ceremonies.
00:37:54
Speaker
through the weekend. Every time there was a prayer, there was song, we were being brought into that culture, which was really humbling and felt sacred. Saturday, they had erected a teepee on the property, which was
00:38:19
Speaker
in and of itself, like there's an amazing picture of it at night. Yeah. Like a real TV. I don't even know how they did it. We don't know, but, um, but yeah, it was, it was, um, at night there was a ceremony there, which was a very traditional, more female, um, oriented lead. So one of the women, um,
00:38:48
Speaker
did all the prayers for that ceremony. And we all did it in groups so that it wasn't everybody packed into this. There was an opportunity to partake in medicine. They had peyote. But it wasn't necessary. One of my things is always safety. You were stressed out. I was stressed out. And as I got closer, I started having all these
00:39:16
Speaker
doubts and thoughts and questions. And, you know, we walked in silence out to the teepee and it was dark. Yeah. And when we were standing outside of it, I spent some time thinking about it. And, um, I realized like a lot of that, a lot of the healing process is about trusting yourself. And also you do have to be brave. I can't remember who was saying this about, cause it sounds great. Like, Oh, you're gonna, I don't know.
00:39:46
Speaker
Like maybe, I don't know, I shouldn't speak for other people, but I could imagine there's a thought of like, Oh, you're going to just do this psychedelic experience. It sounds just like all fun and whatever. And of course we know, we know that that's not maybe quite accurate, but
00:40:01
Speaker
there is an element of bravery. You want to heal? Okay. That doesn't mean it's going to be a spa experience. It might be the hardest thing you do. What was important to me when I had to remind myself is trusting myself and trusting that environment. Everybody there who was leading this, who was surrounding me, I felt safe with. That allowed me to trust that. The ironic part is, of course,
00:40:30
Speaker
didn't probably take enough or I didn't even feel anything. And so I found it kind of comical that I get myself into these things and then I just slept. But I was happy that I made that choice for myself and was able to step forward and say like, okay, I want
00:40:48
Speaker
to participate and do it for my own healing. But it was just amazing, the experience of being in that teepee, regardless of the peyote. I mean, that was sort of not even... Yeah. Yeah. I mean, that's one of the things you think about. That's a new experience, taking this medicine,
00:41:17
Speaker
And then you don't know how it's going to go, all of this. And so, you know, there is a lot of, you know, there's this thing that my coach has shared with me, my integration coach. She's like, you know, the psychedelics and the plant medicines provide you the lessons you need to learn as hard as they may be. And to the point about healing, like learning lessons, it's like, yeah, I got it. And it's like, well, maybe, but how we learn,
00:41:48
Speaker
It's just like growth. Whenever I think about growth, I think about a seed germinating and sprouting and that hard shell that it has to break out of. And then the vulnerability and the consistent application of interacting with one's environment and having the necessary inputs to continue the growth.
00:42:16
Speaker
Similarly with these lessons, I was also glad that you were able to partake not for the altered state of consciousness, but for the respect for really being invited into a sacred ceremony by culture that owes you nothing.
00:42:46
Speaker
Yeah. And as, and, and, and welcomed with arms wide open, you know, that is more, that's, that's way more powerful than just taking, just taking, you know, some, some pay. And that's one of the reasons why. So I,
00:43:06
Speaker
wasn't sure if there was going to be a medicine component either. I wouldn't have been jocked if there was, you know, just knowing the players involved there, but also I'm new to this space. So I don't know. And so, but I had said kind of going in like, I don't, I'm like, what, about six weeks maybe out of my thing. Like I probably wouldn't. Yeah, it wasn't unnecessary. Yeah. And there was no pressure. It didn't feel like that at all. No, not at all.
00:43:35
Speaker
but I'm still integrating for my thing. I want to honor that too. I talked with my coach about it and she's like, there's no wrong answer but this and that. I'm like, okay, so I wasn't going to. Then when it came to the peyote ceremony, it wasn't about like, oh, I'm going to get another one or blah, blah, blah. It was about participating and doing that. It's like, sorry, I got this damn thing.
00:44:03
Speaker
Yeah, that's fine. Yeah, I know. Apologies. We'll edit it out. And that component, and I kind of want to shift to one of the most powerful things for me, the spiritual experience that this was, I mean, it was the most powerful, spiritual, shared experience I've ever been part of.
00:44:32
Speaker
And that's been a... I talked about it last month, but that void certainly was highlighted from my retreat. And I also confronted what filled that void and has been a challenge to work through. And so feeling like there was a catharsism... Cathartic.
00:44:59
Speaker
feeling like there was a cathartic experience previously, but now it's like, okay, great, you cleaned out, but what are you going to fill in with? And the spiritual bucket of mine, I cleaned it out, but it's not there to be empty. And so that was an
Spiritual Experience and Unity
00:45:23
Speaker
awesome thing. And so for
00:45:25
Speaker
for the Native American component to be welcomed. And their whole thing was obviously the Native Americans and the American military have a rocky past. We murdered and slaughtered and damn near exterminated an entire race and our treatment of
00:45:52
Speaker
Our treatment of our own indigenous people is heart-wrenching and it's appalling, but it's also in the past. And the leadership, again, from Chief Phil and the elders and everyone was about unity and healing and moving forward. Which was what that last ceremony was, which was really amazing. And it's hard to really articulate. I don't think it, but that was the message. But it's like, here's somebody.
00:46:22
Speaker
who's saying like, we're not about the past and especially from the veteran, even before being a veteran, anybody that's dealing with trauma or adversity or challenge or the chapters that led you up to this chapter can sometimes be so overwhelming that you've got more chapters.
00:46:49
Speaker
to be in the presence of somebody who has dedicated their life to potentially this moment of bringing people together to heal and to move forward. And to do so on a scale that's not just about this, but others. I mean, it was beautiful. Yeah, it really was. And then, yeah, I mean, I got real emotional. Yeah, the closing ceremony. So that was after everybody finished.
00:47:18
Speaker
We went out and circled around this tree.
00:47:22
Speaker
And I mean, there was the drumming, the Chief Phil. We had made these prayer sticks. And yeah, it was amazing because it was about all of us in unity and what this group was doing. But then there was also the individual we each, I think, healed individually, had an opportunity for that.
00:47:49
Speaker
Yeah, so it was beautiful. It was really an incredible way to end on.
00:47:59
Speaker
Yeah. So now what? So we come back. Well, we didn't quite end on that. Then there was really important barbecue. So that was a quite and people, I told them that I'm like, yeah, well we had the fast and then we, you know, came out of the fast with barbecue and I did your stomach's brother. I'm like, no, no, no, no. Um, yeah. So now what? Um, I don't know. Now what?
00:48:26
Speaker
I don't know. I mean, for me, that was, I think it's important to say, or it's important to me to say that was the single best experience, like physical experience, I would say, you know, that I ever participated in. Wow. Better than my best soccer game, better than being, you know, well, yeah, yeah.
00:48:55
Speaker
all American selection, all of that stuff, the magnitude of what that was. Have I done cooler things? I've done different things, you know, whatever, but that was, and part of what made it so special was sharing it with you. Yeah. You know, and I was really like, I just was full of it. I remember, you know, I'll probably forget at some point, but it's fresh in my mind now, but you know,
00:49:25
Speaker
So the hill, the actual trail, somehow our brothers decided to find a place in Houston, in Texas, sort of like in the hilly. I know. I was like, how is this possible? What about the pancake thing? Anyway, dirt road, a lot of rocks, up and down, kind of like up and down, whatever, up and down hills. But you ended on a downhill.
00:49:56
Speaker
Yeah. And so it was a two mile out and back kind of situation. And I remember kind of coming up to the crest of the last uphill and they were on the top. And then as we're sort of coming down, you know, down into the thing being like, Hey, you know, and we're running this moment, like take this moment in, you know, you think about finishing something like that, be it a workout, be it,
00:50:21
Speaker
Anything that's going to require endurance and resolve and grit and determination and sacrifice out of you. Yeah, of course, it makes sense to want to get to the end of the finish line, but so much of the value and so much of the transformation occurs, obviously, along the journey. It's the process and all that stuff.
00:50:44
Speaker
Is is important and so to to I remember that be like hey, I just want to acknowledge this moment right here because Yeah, whatever this feeling is I is amazing and just you know, yeah having our own little moment there So, yeah, so well, I think what's next I mean for sure from so many different avenues it is
Reflection on Lasting Impact
00:51:11
Speaker
There's some relief, there's hope knowing that people like this exist both for our future and what we choose to pursue and the bigger future of humanity. I think for us, it's continuing to connect with people and see where things go and how more so
00:51:33
Speaker
you realistically can be part of, you know, part of this movement really. Um, but also wanting to extract and not, not necessarily extract because there's a whole separate thing, but wanting to create, I think one of the things we talked about on one of the runs that we do do, but really kind of, it's like take the gloves off kind of deal. Like we do have, we, we have between the ears and very, in very,
00:52:03
Speaker
many ways is about, there's a spiritual fitness movement kind of a thing to it. And I've never acknowledged that one because I've, well, when you say spiritual, there's, but also me, like I've been, you didn't have that. But what it does is provide these experiences, these,
00:52:22
Speaker
these experiences where it's not just a mental thing. It's not just an emotional thing. It's not just a physical thing, but there's something else. There's something a little deeper. There's something a little bigger. What is that? And I, you know, we've talked about in the air, like, what is it? What is it? What is it? What is it? How do you define that now? One of the doctors, Dr. Samuel Lee, who's studying quantum morphogenetics, he's actually trying to measure, I mean, this, this is the most,
00:52:50
Speaker
not great way to describe it, but essentially that soul, that's what our soul is, which we all of course walk around knowing like, yes, of course you have a soul, like people, that's what makes you you and it's not just your hair and skin. But okay, so then what are those frequencies? What is that? What is that tangible thing? And I think that's
00:53:12
Speaker
that's what you're talking about. And that's what people connect to. And that's why people feel good in these pursuits. And one of the other things I think we have is the community piece, that support. And it's just, it's so necessary. Um, so continuing with, you know, not just looking elsewhere, it's like, Oh, getting involved in that. But like, we've built something amazing and
00:53:40
Speaker
continuing to build and grow and do that with between the ears. So that's something we're always working on, but that for sure is probably highlighted a little more.
00:53:57
Speaker
Yeah. So, but I think it's a little not premature to say like what's next or what do we do? It's just sort of right now taking in the experience. Yeah, for sure. And I don't mean like what's next, like what's the next target or gate or whatever, but more so like how to follow through, what does immigration look like? You know, kind of all of that because I mean, it's still, I think we did an okay job sort of.
00:54:26
Speaker
We did a good job of saying what we did and stuff, but the essence of it and the feelings of it. There's obviously a lot we didn't include.
00:54:40
Speaker
Well, whatever. And it's most people, I think, understand that you have an experience, you can articulate and narrate what happened, but that doesn't project the feelings. So what's important, I think, to note is just, yeah, this was huge. It was pivotal for us, but also thereby by people we, you know, what we're doing and how we go forward and I'm excited about that. And I think that's one of the things, you know, we want to also, that's one of the reasons why
00:55:11
Speaker
That's how Between the Ears was birthed. It was birthed out of this desire of sharing, of recreating, and creating experiences that we were fortunate to have and wanted to share with others. It's always been about sharing the stuff with others.
00:55:39
Speaker
without it being, for some people doing that, going to Houston isn't possible. For some people going to the military or for some people doing an Iron Man or whatever, that's not always possible. And so it's always been, Between the Ears has always been about sharing experiences with others and this just reinforced how that is the spirit of Between the Ears and these types of things wanting to really
00:56:10
Speaker
we'll never be able to copy what happened. That would be disrespectful. And frankly, we're not, we're not, we can't, but creating our own, in addition to our supporting thing for folks. And so that's really what, yeah. And we have, I mean, we have an event coming up in two weeks and it's, you know, an overnight thing. It could be so easy to say, well, it's just people are going to like get on some cardio and do that. Sure. Okay. Or.
00:56:36
Speaker
It's an opportunity for some really incredible people coming together. We get to facilitate that, provide an experience, all that stuff. So there's plenty of opportunities if we choose to take them. Yeah. And the people who want to have some type of transcendent spiritual experience and using the body to be... The body is the vessel through which we experience life.
00:57:06
Speaker
That's what we're given. This form is what we're given to experience life. And to the extent that you're able to use your body, which a lot of people aren't, if you are, my opinion is that you have a, not that you have a moral obligation to do what you have to do. Cause I think that phrase sometimes gets overused, but you have an opportunity.
00:57:37
Speaker
that others don't. And if you want to extract it, if you want to experience, because this vessel is that which we experience life in. And by using the body, by interacting within and without, within yourself and outside of yourself and your environment, that is like... Yeah. And I think one of the things when we look at between the ears that is
00:58:04
Speaker
physical piece but we kind of talked about a little bit this morning but you can use your body if you're not practicing really being in your body then then you're missing something as well to get to that point of transcendence like you kind of have to learn to work with yourself it's not being in
00:58:25
Speaker
you know, your body is a vessel that can work with you to accomplish these things. And I think a lot of us where this ties into some of the fitness stuff is like the fitness industry, there's oftentimes where it becomes your adversary, you're working against it, you're punishing your body. And like, that's part of our journey to move past that to get to a place where it's, it's, it's a tool. It's a thing that is working for you, not against you. For sure. And that's also at the,
00:58:54
Speaker
subconscious level, you can dissociate from your body and that's not really a choice. You're not like, all right, I'm going to dissociate and then you turn the lights off. When true dissociation occurs, you're in the midst of something horrific and it's a safety, it's a survival mechanism. So that defense
00:59:21
Speaker
is a huge one. Now to reestablish and reconnect safety within your body and to feel safe within your body is an absolute must. And doing so on a consistent basis, doing so
00:59:41
Speaker
you know, from a learning standpoint, where some days you might not feel safe, some days you might not know what that is, some days you might say, okay, okay, different things. But yeah, to use the body and to try to partner with it, because it's got a language that sometimes we don't know and we need to learn, but not, you know, not trying is not an option actually for us.
01:00:11
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. So that'll be cool. No real announcements with what we've got. I'm thinking of something in July, actually.
01:00:22
Speaker
Yeah. Well, there's things coming. So the announcement is if you're interested in getting involved, there's plenty of opportunities from, so. Yeah. We've got my ceiling coming up. You've got a six week women's group coming up. We have, there are spots still for the triathlon. If people want to do an experience that is community, that's using your body, that's on the 26th, it was rescheduled because of weather. So there are some spots if you want to enter in and
01:00:49
Speaker
you don't have to know anybody. So reach out, but yeah, good things coming. Yeah, that's for sure. So just want to reiterate a sincere heartfelt debt of gratitude and appreciation for everybody that
01:01:06
Speaker
you know, did contribute beyond just financial as well. Lots of folks checked in and that was obviously like, thank you. Cause you, frankly, you, you're helping save someone's life legitimately. That's not like some bullshit. That was a legitimate statement. But there was also folks who, you know, really checked in and sent us their thoughts and prayers and were,
01:01:34
Speaker
and we're moved, and maybe even if you were like, all right, right on, y'all are doing that, I can do this in my own life for my thing. There's multiple forms of currency, and the most powerful form, I think, is our interactions, is our actions. It is also our actions that are aligned with our beliefs and our values and our spirit.
01:02:01
Speaker
you know, in our soul and in the direction of something useful and positive. And you know, I think that's the calling. That's the, that's the follow through that I hope we can continue to facilitate and encourage, um, to have the human, the human currency be what we, we really drive home and stuff. So cool. Very cool. All right. Well, see you whenever. Bye.