Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Episode 7: Why We Struggle with Anger
89 Plays3 years ago
Recommended
Transcript
Introduction to Anger and Faith
00:00:02
Speaker
Hi, I'm Ruth Schwank and I'm so thrilled you're listening in with us at Root Like Faith. It is our deepest desire to encourage and equip men and women to be rooted in God's word, transformed by the love of Jesus and moved by his mission in the power of the Holy Spirit. Nothing is more important.
00:00:19
Speaker
On today's episode of Root Like Faith, we are talking about anger. Oh boy, this is gonna get interesting. We're gonna answer these two questions. What is anger? And why is everyone so mad right now? Yep, this is going to be good. So let's go.
Anger and Lent: A Spiritual Perspective
00:00:42
Speaker
Well, we're getting closer to Easter. And as we continue to focus on Lent, we are going to be talking about anger in actually the next two episodes. I feel like, you know, in talking about anger, you probably need to. Deserves like four. Yeah, that's true. Maybe a maybe a whole season anyway. Oh, it seems like everyone. Don't you agree, honey? Everyone's angry about something right now.
00:01:04
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, I think, again, as we enter into the Lenten season, this is just another opportunity for us to draw near to Jesus. And we are dying to ourselves, we're dying to our sinful, selfish desires, our pride, and all of those things that rob us of the life that God wants to give us. And this is that intentional time of the year that we are drawing near to Jesus so that we might experience more and more that resurrection life. Yes.
00:01:28
Speaker
what Jesus offers us through the power of His Spirit. And we want to enter into Easter more like Him than we were before. And so there's this 40-day preparation period leading up to Easter, and that's what we've been talking about. And so this theme of anger, I think, is just really, really appropriate because it is something that everybody wrestles with.
Cultural Climate of Anger
00:01:47
Speaker
And it seems like especially right now with the culture we're living in, whether it's politically, socially, I mean, just everything, it just seems like everywhere you go, people have a short fuse these days. Yeah. And I think I do want to mention here, if you haven't had a chance to listen to those past episodes, I think that would be a good place to start because we talk about humility, which
00:02:10
Speaker
oh wow yeah you know and pride and i mean this i feel like anger has a lot to do with all of that so or in helping our anger so anyways i would back it up start with um our first episodes on lent and they lead right into these next two episodes on anger
00:02:27
Speaker
But oh my word, I'm sure a lot of us could think of really funny stories Well, there's some stories that are not funny that have to do with anger and I do understand that but I am thinking of a story right now that is so funny that has to do with anger and I think It goes
Humorous Anger in Christian Context
00:02:44
Speaker
back honey. Do you remember this when I think it was no Noah or Tyler was playing basketball This was a few years ago
00:02:50
Speaker
No, it was Tyler. It was Tyler. If I'm thinking of the story that you're thinking of, it was Tyler, yeah. So, you know, parents can get a little out of control and coaches out of control when it comes to sports that our kids are in. You know, and people just... Especially the Christian leagues.
00:03:08
Speaker
I remember growing up, my dad and sisters played in, like, church softball was really big back then, and maybe it still is, but back in the 80s, 90s, that was a big deal. It was so much fun to go and watch, and those were the most sinful leagues to be a part of. It was like you just saw the true depravity of mankind come out of those. I mean, not our family, not my dad or my sisters, but other people.
00:03:36
Speaker
Well, I'm telling you, I mean, like at these games, sometimes our kids play basketball and sometimes at these games, you're like, oh, my word, like who? Yeah. And again, this isn't me. No, this is this was actually a coach. If that's the story you're thinking about where a coach, mind you, this is a Christian homeschool basketball league.
00:03:59
Speaker
And it was, I think Tyler at the time was playing JV, so it was early on when he, it was probably maybe three years ago. And one of the coaches from the other team, the reason I really remember this, because I remember I was doing Scorebook. Oh, you were right there. So I was right there, I was in the heat of conversation there. And the visiting team, the coach got mad about a call and he walked out onto the court
00:04:25
Speaker
and got a technical, the woman who was one of the referees that night just turned around and gave him a quick technical. Now we, in the years to come, we would find out that this, she was no nonsense, but that was the first time that I think we'd had her have her as a referee. And she's awesome, we've gotten to know her over the years, I've helped coach. And she's great, but man, the minute he walked out onto the court, she teed him up. And then that really was like, he went from like a six to a nine.
00:04:51
Speaker
And he walked back and then he turned around and came back out again. Yeah, he couldn't even handle it. And she teed him up a second time. And so I'm just sitting there going, this is amazing. And mind you, everybody is silent now in the stands, watching. Like, what is going on? You can hear everything. This is not a big gym. And again, this is all Christian homeschool parents. And so it's just dead quiet now. And so two technicals means that you're out. You have to leave. You have to leave.
00:05:19
Speaker
And I'll never forget, so he's so mad, he's fuming, I mean, there's practically steam coming out of his ears. He marches by the score table, goes by our bench, and then he gets to the door of the gym where he has to, he's getting ready to leave, and he's getting ready to exit the gym. But before he does, he turns around, and mind you, again, this is, everybody can hear. I mean, this is like so close. We're all staring at him. We're all watching this. And he turns around and he yells at the lady, lady, you're out of control.
00:05:48
Speaker
and then turns and walks out the door, and he was so mad, and that's what made it so funny, is he- Yeah, the irony of it all. Yeah, that he yells to her across the whole- I just remember thinking, I think you're out of control. Yeah, exactly, yells across the whole gym to her, you're out of control, lady. Oh my goodness, but I just think that's just a funny story. It is, and I think we've all had those moments where we just lose our cool, and five minutes later or the next day, we're like, oh my word, was that me? What was I thinking?
00:06:17
Speaker
And I remember early on in COVID, just driving over to Home Depot. And it was when stores had kind of just started to open up
Anger in the COVID Era
00:06:26
Speaker
again. And I remember just driving through the parking lot and somebody behind me, they were just so, that was like the first time where I was like, wow, there's just something going on where people are upset, like they're mad. And it just was sort of the first time
00:06:41
Speaker
that I began to realize this is something, especially right now in the culture that we're living in, that collectively there is this impatience, there is an anger that seems to just bubble up in a variety of different ways. And so we see that, we see that in our own life. We see it in comical ways like the coach being kicked out of the gym. And of course we see the really just painful sobering reality of anger and just how devastating
00:07:10
Speaker
it can be in a marriage or in a family or in a relationship. It's nothing new. It's nothing new. And it is such a destructive thing. And so we want to talk about that today.
Spiritual Growth and Anger Management
00:07:20
Speaker
Why is everybody so angry? And we'll be talking about that, of course, today and then also next week, because it is. I think it's a struggle that we all have. And again, as we consider becoming more and more like Jesus and rooting our life in Him and drawing closer to Him, He wants to produce in us these fruits of the Spirit, love, joy, peace, patience,
00:07:40
Speaker
kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. And anger's not on that list.
00:07:45
Speaker
Yeah, no, it's not. So, you know, here, let's start with talking about why, you know, why there's so much anger. And I think, you know, again, we can all admit that there's different things that set us off. But I think there's a deeper issue going on most of the time. And and so I think the things that we see in this world, well, first of all, obviously, we're sinful creatures.
Deeper Causes of Anger: Sin and Suffering
00:08:12
Speaker
We're sinful human beings in need of a savior, and there's a reason we need a savior is because we're not perfect. And so struggling with anger, again, like I said, it's nothing new. Yes, people seem to be a little bit on edge right now, just in our culture, but anger's been around forever, and we can all struggle at different times. So I think when we look at the deeper issues like sin, obviously,
00:08:37
Speaker
I think we can also see things in our life that maybe you're going through a really hard time like suffering and suffering can bring out the worst in you. Yeah. I mean, I think that there's all sorts of these sort of these deeper reasons for why, you know, we experience anger. And you're right. I mean, we walk through, you know, really, really challenging things in life. And we we suffer. I mean, I just think about, you know, my own battle with with cancer. And there's times where, you know, you are
00:09:07
Speaker
sad, you're devastated, you're depressed, but there are times where you're angry. And there have been times in my own life where I have wrestled with that over the last several weeks or months or even the last couple of years since that diagnosis of just being angry about it and not understanding why at my age I would have to walk through that. And so the people go through really difficult things. Maybe it's
00:09:30
Speaker
divorce or an unfaithful spouse or a son or daughter that walks away from their faith. You know, a woman that has a miscarriage and all of her friends around her are getting pregnant. There's so many different examples of just ways that we suffer. We go through trials and so anger can be a very natural response to suffering, to the human condition. I think disappointment as well as we experience different disappointments in life.
00:09:58
Speaker
And I think that, you know, that kind of goes along with suffering. I just think, you know, suffering, disappointments, those, we have so many emotions going on, you know, whether we're going through depression or disappointed from something that didn't go, how we hoped it would, we're suffering with a health diagnosis, whatever it is, those bring to the surface all sorts of emotions. And I think whenever emotions are running high,
00:10:26
Speaker
The struggle with with you have a short
Heart Issues and Beliefs About Anger
00:10:29
Speaker
fuse, you know anger is is right there ready ready ready to unleash And so I it's it's gonna happen and it's how we're gonna handle that you know, it's how we're gonna handle those emotions and one we're experiencing suffering and disappointments and
00:10:49
Speaker
I think as we get into talking more about anger in the rest of this episode, but next week, I think what we're going to really see is we've talked about before that it's really, it reveals what's going on in the heart. And so what we begin to see when we begin looking at our anger, what makes us angry is that there is something deeper going on in the heart. There are certain things that
00:11:13
Speaker
that maybe we believe about God or that we believe about the way the world is supposed to work or that our life is supposed to work, that really is the root of that anger. And so we're going to get into that more probably next week and in the next episode. And we'll talk about ways that we can actually overcome anger and all of that. So I just want to, yeah, that's a good note to make there so that you make sure that you join us next week for that.
Righteous vs Unrighteous Anger: Biblical Insights
00:11:37
Speaker
Yeah, and I think it's really important as we talk about anger today just to separate the difference between righteous anger and unrighteous anger because, you know, not all anger is bad. You know, I think sometimes we can think that anybody that gets upset is in some way doing something wrong. And the reality is when we look at the Scriptures and we look at the character of God even,
00:11:57
Speaker
We recognize that there is a difference between righteous anger, anger that is legitimate and justified and good and true, and then unrighteous anger, anger that is sinful and selfish and motivated by our own wants and desires. And so I think it's really important for us just as we think about that battle with anger that we all have,
00:12:18
Speaker
just to distinguish between those two things. There is a righteous anger, but there's also an unrighteous anger. And so we're really talking about unrighteous anger. You know, when you think about the character of God or the nature of God, I mean, he's a God who gets angry. And so you think about, you know, not just the Old Testament, but the New Testament. I mean, Jesus himself got angry. He goes into the temple and he sees, you know, the religious leaders of the day taking advantage of the Jewish people.
00:12:47
Speaker
And he gets angry. He turns those tables over. He, you know, is displaying a righteous anger. And so I think what you see in the character of God or the nature of God is that when God gets angry, it's always an expression of what He loves.
00:13:02
Speaker
And so when we think about God getting angry at impurity, for example, it's because He's a God that loves purity. Or when God gets angry about deceit or lying, it's because He's a God that loves the truth. You know, those are just several examples where you think about as a parent, like you'd be a bad parent if you never got angry when it came to protecting your child. And so there is a righteous anger
00:13:24
Speaker
that we see in the character and the actions of God, and that's the kind of anger that is good and true. It's right, it's justifiable. You know, in the New Testament, Paul says in Ephesians 4, verse 29, it says, in your anger, do not sin. And so he's not saying, don't ever get angry. He's saying, in your anger, make sure that you don't sin. And again, he's appealing to that idea that there is that righteous anger and unrighteous anger. Right.
00:13:51
Speaker
that we all wrestle with. And so he's essentially saying, be careful that your anger that you have, it's not motivated by sin. See, I love that. I love that clarification you just said, that it's not motivated by sin. Because when I hear that verse in your anger, do not sin, I think, how is that even possible? Except for that there is righteous anger, like we mentioned. But I think it's the motivation of our heart, like you said.
00:14:17
Speaker
Yeah. I think, you know, again, we'll get more into that in the next episode, but, you know, as we were talking about before, you know, those seven deadly sins, you know, anger is on that list. You know, we talked about last time how, you know, these capital sins just means that there's not an exhaustive list there, but those seven deadly sins are like
00:14:38
Speaker
You know really the the chief sins that give rise to every other sin and so we said, you know in our episode about humility that that pride is really at the top of that list that it leads to other sins and so each of those seven deadly sins Really give rise to to other sins and anger is on that list and we know that that anger you know leads to other other sins and anger is always irrational and
00:15:01
Speaker
And so there are so many dangerous things and devastating things about anger. And so we have to be so careful that when we get angry, as Paul says, that we're not motivated by sin or we're not getting angry out of our own sin and selfishness. And so I wanna, maybe this is helpful as we think about why the struggle with sin is so significant. I would just say that in part,
00:15:28
Speaker
because anger is natural. What I mean by that is that because we've been made in the image of God, you know, we've talked about this before that the Genesis chapter 1 describes the creation account and that we were made in God's image, we're made to know Him and to love Him and to serve Him.
00:15:43
Speaker
And so to be made in the image of God or the likeness of God means that there are certain things about who God is that He shares with us. We have those shared attributes and there's certainly lots of things about God that are unique to Him, but there are certain attributes that we possess that God has. And so to be made in the image or likeness of God,
00:16:02
Speaker
is such an amazing thing, but because God gets angry, then the result of that is that we too, because we're made in His image, we can get angry. Naturally. Naturally. And so, on the one hand, it is natural
00:16:17
Speaker
for us to get angry because we're made in the image of God who also gets angry. And that's a righteous anger. And it's a righteous anger. Right. Now the second part of that is that we're also sinful. And so God gets angry, we're made in His image, and so therefore we get angry. The difference is that God is without sin. And so because we're fallen, we're sinful, we're selfish, our anger can easily turn into unrighteous anger. That's where we struggle. That's the problem. That's the problem. That's where we go awry.
00:16:43
Speaker
Definitely.
Anger as a Moral Choice
00:16:45
Speaker
Well, listen, we're going to actually wrap this episode up. I know it's a short one because like we said, we kind of wanted to introduce anger and then talk more practically next week because we want to go through what's important for us to know about anger specifically. So as we wrap this up, that's where we're going to end here. We're going to talk about what is important for us to know.
00:17:09
Speaker
about anger, and I think the first thing for us to know is that it's a moral issue. It involves the will. It's a moral act. Yeah, I mean, I think sometimes we have this false idea about anger, even as Christians, that it's sort of like, I remember your dad gave us a punching bag years ago. I don't think it ever made its way. It didn't. We never hung it up. It just was out in a garage taking up space.
00:17:34
Speaker
Not that I'm upset about that. I'm not angry about it, but it was in the way, and I think we ended up just giving it away or whatever. But I think sometimes we have this idea that anger is like this thing inside of us that just needs to be vented. We just need to get it out. So we just need to go out in the garage and punch the punching bag for 10 minutes and come back. Ah, we're so much better. And so I think that that's a really important thing that we need to remember as we talk about anger.
00:18:02
Speaker
especially as we come back to this in the next episode, that anger isn't like this thing inside of us. That we just gotta get out. We just have to get out. I mean, it involves the will and sin becomes sin when it involves the will and we're choosing something. Yeah.
00:18:19
Speaker
And so anger is a moral act. It's a choice that we make. And so it's not like steam inside of us that needs to be released, but it is a moral act. It's something that we choose. And it's an action that needs to be repented of. And so we will talk more about that, but it's that idea that really anger is so much more. It involves the will.
00:18:41
Speaker
It really is a moral act. It's a choice that we make to be angry for a variety of reasons. We're going to look at some of those heart issues in the next episode. But I would say that in response to that, it really is then something that has to be dealt with at the heart level.
00:18:59
Speaker
it has to be rooted out, it has to be repented of. And so we're gonna talk about that in our next episode. And so it really is, there's so many things underneath our anger that we have to look at and to be able to identify and ask God to give us grace, to turn from that and to turn to Him so that He can help us overcome.
00:19:17
Speaker
that destructive, unrighteous anger that we all wrestle with. You know what's interesting to me is I'm thinking back over the last 10 years of online ministry, and I'll say that the topic that is the all-time most popular topic that draws the most traffic, the most readers,
00:19:38
Speaker
all of it is anger. And I think that that is just evidence that we all struggle with anger. And I feel like when I think about that, I think about the listener who's like, oh my word, I can never get over this. I've been trying for years to stop getting angry, to stop yelling at my kids, to stop, whatever it is, will I ever change? And so I wanna give the listener hope here.
00:20:08
Speaker
that remember, this is an act of our will. There's a deeper issue here. This is about dealing with the heart. And I think that should give you hope, you know, really that God can change us. He can heal us of that.
00:20:24
Speaker
And I think it's so important as we wrap up this episode to, yeah, just be reminded that, again, the Christian life is a journey, and it's a lifelong process. And I think one of the things that the enemy would love to do with any sin that we struggle with, maybe more than others, is to tell us just that, that you're never gonna change, that this is who you are, and you're never gonna become more patient, you're never gonna become more loving or more able to listen to...
00:20:51
Speaker
I think the enemy would love for us to believe that this is something that we'll never have victory over. And so I think as we close, I think just that encouragement, we've used that phrase before, begin again, that Bruno Linteri used many, many years ago, and just that idea that when we know Jesus and we've been forgiven by Him, there's always an opportunity to begin again, that when we fall short, that when we sin,
00:21:18
Speaker
that God's grace is abundant, and we need to begin again with God's help and the power of
Encouragement and Growth Through Faith
00:21:24
Speaker
His Spirit. If you're listening today, and this is especially a struggle for you, I want to just encourage you that there is the promise of new life. There's the promise of victory, not because you try harder,
00:21:36
Speaker
not because you just sort of, you know, think that God's going to zap you of this, but because God, you know, who started this relationship with you is going to bring it to completion. And the work that he started in you, he's going to bring to completion. And he wants you to turn this over to him so that he can continue bringing transformation and growth and ultimately life
00:21:59
Speaker
for you. That's so good. And you know, it's so interesting that you said the word victory because literally that word was like in my mind, I kept thinking victory, victory. And so I just, yeah, want to encourage you as a listener that God wants to give you victory in this area. So be sure that you are subscribed. So you do not miss next week's episode because we are going to get really practical
00:22:23
Speaker
We're going to talk about overcoming anger, how you can practically do that. We're going to really get to the heart of the issue, which is all about the heart of the issue. Well, we're so grateful you have joined us. If you haven't had a chance to listen back to the other episodes about Lent, be sure that you do that. We're talking about humility and pride and confession. It's a great season and great episodes to listen to as we are in the middle of the season of Lent.
00:22:53
Speaker
We're getting close to Easter. I know. It's almost here. Also, if we haven't met you, we want to get to know you. Be sure to follow us on Instagram at Patrick W. Schwank and at Ruth Schwank. Send us a DM. We check those. Or you can also find us on Facebook. Also, don't forget, everything we have talked about today will be at rootlikefaith.com.
00:23:16
Speaker
We're so thrilled you've joined us. We welcome you into our family here at Root Like Faith, and we really do. I think that's a family. We welcome you in here with us. Would you do us a big favor and leave us a review or rating and share this podcast with your friends? It just takes a second. It's a tremendous help to us as we spread the word about Root Like Faith. I keep wanting to say, Root Like.
00:23:40
Speaker
Are you trying to take over the podcast, honey? Ruth like faith. Oh, be sure to take us on social media when you share the podcast because we'd love to see it. We're so grateful for your help in getting the word out. All right, friend, we'll talk next. We'll talk next week more about anger. Help you have a great week.