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Nekromantik (1988)
0 Playsin 2 hours
This week on the Erotic Thriller Club we dive into the 80's German video nasty Nekromantik! Threesomes are all fun and games until someone falls in love. Unfortunately for us all one of the participants in this threesome is a decaying corpse. It's time to laugh, cry and throw up a little bit as we discuss this grotesque shock fest.
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Transcript
Introduction of the Erotic Thriller Club
00:00:00
Speaker
Ladies, gentlemen, folks beyond the binary, grab your husband, wife, partner, mistress, a condom, formaldehyde, barbecue, all the fixings, and gather around your radio.
00:00:12
Speaker
It's time for this week's meeting of The Erotic Thriller Club.
00:00:25
Speaker
Antithesis, mysterious and dangerous, and oh yes, they've got all the sexiest movies out of the ages. So if you're fatally attracted to the raciest stuff, I'll ride in film club, basically instinctively crave the salacious.
Co-host Kit's Wedding and Film Choices
00:01:08
Speaker
The date is Wednesday, October 22, 2025. We're a mere few days away from our lovely co-host Kit's wedding day. She has any number of things she could be doing to prepare, or even just relax.
00:01:22
Speaker
Instead, she found herself watching a film that helps show the dangers of introducing a corpse into the bedroom to spice up your marriage. What have we done to our dear sweet Kit?
00:01:33
Speaker
Have the Germans gifted her a fun weekend at Bernie's-style romp? or a vomit-inducing field trip to a crime scene.
Discussion on 'Necromantic' Film
00:01:41
Speaker
This week on the Erotic Thriller Club, Necromantic.
00:01:46
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to this week's meeting of the Erotic Thriller Club. As always, Garrett Callender and Kit Ryan here. And this is where we answer the genre's three most important questions.
00:01:57
Speaker
Was I aroused? Was I thrilled? And would I ruin my life for this corpse? Happy Wedding Week, Kit. Thanks, Garrett. This is the worst present of all time.
00:02:10
Speaker
You what was the worst present? We're shadow banned on YouTube from the last episode. And I'll tell you what, this one isn't getting us unbanned. Oh, no. we try and not say naughty for 10 minutes, but I don't think we're going get there. I don't think we're going to make it ah Garrett, you know, some people as a wedding guest will get a stand mixer or.
00:02:35
Speaker
or A set of China dishware. Uh-huh. And you you got me 47 seconds of watching pee.
00:02:49
Speaker
Mm-hmm. Is that combined? Yes, I did. i did. i And that's, I literally smacked it out starting on the frame when the the the stream starts and stopped when, you know, the last drop.
Controversies and Censorship in Erotic Films
00:03:06
Speaker
drops out. So 47 seconds
00:03:11
Speaker
of just peeing.
00:03:14
Speaker
Which I want be honest up front. I know. i was less mad about the 47 seconds of this than I was about the two minutes and 30 seconds of frolicking in a field of flowers.
00:03:32
Speaker
There were a lot of things that you could argue... were used to pad a 70 minute runtime. Reusing footage, uh, being a chief among them.
00:03:44
Speaker
I mean, it was a very cheap movie, obviously. It's a a German film. It was on the Video Nasties list. um you know a list video Video Nasties?
00:03:56
Speaker
It was a list of movies. I believe that term was ah started in the UK. And it was a list of banned movies. I think originally there were about 79 movies on the list.
00:04:09
Speaker
And now I think they're down to most of them have been released. And it's around 39 movies. Though, movie Oh, man, I want to... this Did this one get get unbanned? or is this one Yeah, this one's... This good to go. Okay, so I want to know what's in the other ones.
00:04:29
Speaker
The ones that still won't make it. Let's see. What are the remaining... final 39. I'm seeing ah the Driller Killer Faces of Death is still on there.
00:04:45
Speaker
There's a few Giallo movies. Mardi Gras Massacre. That sounds fun. You know we love Nolens. Actually, it's showing that some of these were even released uncut.
00:04:58
Speaker
But yeah, no, there's still a handful of movies. This movie in particular, though, is still banned in multiple countries to this day. ah You can't watch this movie in Iceland, Malaysia, Singapore, Nova Scotia, and Ontario in Canada. You're not allowed.
00:05:13
Speaker
Let me tell you, Nova Scotians and Ontarians, Ontarians, Ontarians, and ger andder keep going i don't know pad the runtime of this podcast the runtime of the podcast folks you ain't missing much don't worry about it don't listen to her she's wrong two weeks in a row this movie made me laugh so much know what i can't deny i did have a couple of serious giggles
00:05:47
Speaker
so I mean, yeah the credits list, et cetera, at one point. And that's when, like, in the opening credits, where, you know, only the most important names are presumably going to make it to the opening credits. And you were just like, eh, whatever, et cetera.
00:06:05
Speaker
Folks, and get ready, because there is a sequel to this, and I hear that it's the equivalent of, like, an Evil Dead, Evil Dead 2. And so the budget is higher, and I hear it is even more fun.
00:06:17
Speaker
Oh, wowie. I mean, clearly, whatever budget they did have was spent on the effects. Like, they did not spend a dime elsewhere. Certainly not on Foley work.
00:06:30
Speaker
but I love... the she As she says that, she said the movie opens with pee. It is the squishiest piss sound you've ever heard. so squi The piss is so squishy and dark, I couldn't tell what was happening.
00:06:45
Speaker
Yeah. yeah ah This is available on Shudder, which is where I watched it. um
00:06:56
Speaker
It's, ah wow. Yeah. It starts off warning you. It tells you it's grossly offensive and shouldn't be seen by minors. So, you know, it's not pretending not to be what it is.
00:07:12
Speaker
want to read the letterbox description of this movie. Hmm. yeah A necrophiliac street sweeper who cleans up after grisly accidents brings home a corpse for him and his girlfriend to enjoy sexually, but is dismayed to see that she prefers the corpse over him.
00:07:29
Speaker
And to be honest, yeah, the corpse was better. It was a better lover. yeah he's Our hero isn't a great guy, folks.
00:07:40
Speaker
No, he can't hold down a job um that already doesn't mind him stealing eyeballs from corpses. Like, this is clearly a fairly lenient sort of workplace.
00:07:55
Speaker
And he still can't manage to to follow basic biohazardous waste, you know, protocols. He can't show up on time. ah
00:08:07
Speaker
He's a loser. And she was right to leave him for the corpse, who is a much more generous lover. I was going to say that corpse can hold down a job and that job is eating pussy.
00:08:19
Speaker
Hell yes. Garrett, we are not 10 minutes in yet.
00:08:26
Speaker
We knew we weren't going to make it. Yeah, yeah we're just we're done on YouTube, guys. Sorry. His job is to to pleasure his woman, and this corpse is getting perfect ah performance reviews.
Critique of 'Necromantic' Plot and Characters
00:08:43
Speaker
Do you think, okay, just ah to start with the beginning of the movie, yes, woman pissing and on the roadside, a man angry that his wife- She took too long pissing.
00:08:54
Speaker
Pissing, and then they're immediately struck by a train and grisly murdered. um We had fun here. She's cut in half. You know, we we buried the body like halfway up and then put guts like where her tummy should be. It's great.
00:09:10
Speaker
Well, since you're about to be married, ah are you or John the one that would more likely cause the wreck? Like the one that has to go pee on the roadside?
00:09:27
Speaker
I feel like I'm the one more likely to pee on the roadside. But we wouldn't get into the problem with like, oh, she can't figure out where they are on the map.
00:09:39
Speaker
And then he grabs the map because we live in the modern era of ah GPS. So it's not a problem. Oh, all sorts of internet shit was down yesterday from some Amazon system. There were multiple things I was unable to use.
00:09:54
Speaker
So let, ah hey, I'm just saying scenarios are possible. If it comes down to needing a paper map and we are in a place that we have not, you know, like if we're driving down the same highway to get to my parents' house that we always do, we're fine. don't need the GPS.
00:10:10
Speaker
If it's somewhere I've never been before, like we're in the middle of, don't know, Idaho or something. um We're not going if the GPS is out. ah I'm not fucking with no paper map.
00:10:22
Speaker
I'm just not. It was really funny when she's like, where are we? And he says, you're the one holding the map. Like, that does not help, dude. The map doesn't have a big arrow that says you are here.
00:10:36
Speaker
And to be fair, it was so dark, I could barely see them. There was no way to read that map. Absolutely no way to read that map. So after they're halved and we see the hazmat boys show up to clean up the crime scene, this was the first scene that had me in absolute tears.
00:10:56
Speaker
And I wish this was a scene you had timed. Which part? A single shot of four guys in hazmat suits with no gloves. No.
00:11:06
Speaker
Barehanded guts into a trash bag. yeah highly love did not bother with body bags they were like we do not have the budget for a body bag for this movie what we have the budget for is two black trash bags taped together in the middle we put one over the head one over the feet and we just tape it down the middle and that is the only
00:11:33
Speaker
Is it protocol in a crime scene pickup like that to reach into the halved corpse and remove all the guts? I did wonder about that. Like, nobody questioned the fact that he plucked out the guy's eyeball.
00:11:48
Speaker
Why would you need to remove an eyeball before putting it in a body bag? That don't make no sense. Nobody was going to mention, like, buddy, why did you do that? Every corpse boy's got an eye jar at home that they're collecting shit.
00:12:04
Speaker
Yeah, you're absolutely right. And here's the thing. This was made in what, 1987? It's not like they didn't know about blood-borne diseases.
00:12:15
Speaker
they they There is no reason. Why are you even wearing a hazmat suit if you're not going to wear gloves? ah Like, ah I guess just to protect your clothes is the literal only reason.
00:12:28
Speaker
This movie knew it was a comedy and it knew it was a comedy... with the just scooping up guts, bare hand, uncut shot camera set up in one angle.
00:12:39
Speaker
And I felt like I watched him do that for like three minutes. And I loved every minute of it. I, with each scoop of guts, I laughed harder. So unnecessary.
00:12:51
Speaker
it was so hilariously unnecessary. But then again, you are hiring a corpse removal service that has, which I guess tech may call it a a sweet,
00:13:02
Speaker
street sweeping or like a like sanitate but like they have a skull and crossbones in their logo and it is a highly detailed skull which does to me seem um a wee bit tacky it The skull and crossbones like a parking cone that they sit next to the dead body as if you aren't going to see this horrific halved woman with guts spilling all over the ground.
00:13:32
Speaker
Thank God that orange parking cone is is there to warn you. Yeah, they can't put up caution tape that ah for the same reason they can't afford to invest in body bags.
00:13:44
Speaker
Oh my God. They had enough money for one little sign and that's it. And then when we're done with this, we're almost immediately thrown into another pissing scene ah only seven minutes and 50 seconds into the film.
00:13:59
Speaker
And you're watching a you're watching that penis mictorate kit. You're seeing it on film. And when he is done peeing into that urinal, does little you shaky shake.
00:14:10
Speaker
That is not a shake. He gives it a jerky jerk. It is a jerky jerk. It had me question, am I shaky shaking wrong? is it more effective to Is it more effective to jerky jerk four or five times?
00:14:25
Speaker
I've never seen the jerky jerk in a urinal. Having literally never, never. I mean, I guess this is odd to say, but I've never seen a penis... be shook at post pee in my life.
00:14:42
Speaker
It's never occurred in front of me. I did not know what the protocol was. And so I was just like, is that, is that how, is that the technique? I didn't think it was. That's not what it looks like.
00:14:54
Speaker
when you see people from behind, like in the movies and they're like up against a tree and they do a little like bounce sort of feel. That's, but I didn't know what they were doing over there. Maybe they were like giving it a jerky jerk and I just couldn't see.
00:15:09
Speaker
I'm glad to know that that is not official protocol, that that was in fact just this weirdo. And here's the thing is I was already timing frame by frame how long the P was.
00:15:19
Speaker
No drops came out while he was doing that. but so I mean, maybe it is effective then. it's ah It's also a new German stereotype for me. If you thought the week, the Germans.
00:15:35
Speaker
These two movies together are not giving me a good impression of what European cinema is like.
00:15:45
Speaker
I think you're right. I think you're correct though. If we're basing a foreign cinema off of Giallo and these, hey, things aren't going well over there, folks.
00:15:58
Speaker
No, actually, Teton was great. You're wrong on that one still. This movie is also great in its own right. In its own very specific way. I couldn't believe, though, how much we were able to up the ante from last episode.
00:16:14
Speaker
This movie, like, really blew Teton out of the water. Oh, yeah, yeah. The Germans weren't allowed... ah the The Germans were not about to let the French get away with thinking that they were edgy.
00:16:27
Speaker
No, no, no, the Germans say. Nein, nein, nein, the Germans say. We are going to ah up the ante here significantly and show you the meaning of nasty.
00:16:42
Speaker
I liked that the guy wore his bloody hazmat suit home. Oh, yeah. And apparently no one commented on that. um Which does mean, though, that since he ah drove home in his own car, that presumably he just got like viscera and blood all over his seats, which sucks.
00:17:01
Speaker
I also want to point out, we see that his co-worker whining about him to his boss. And he gives not one specific reason. He's just like, this guy's not working out. i don't like him.
00:17:15
Speaker
Fire him. And he doesn't mention, like, he stole an eyeball. and And he jerks his wiener at the urinal.
00:17:25
Speaker
He couldn't give single actual concrete reason why he didn't like this guy. And there are many...
00:17:36
Speaker
Vibes, throwing off the vibes in the back of the corpse truck. Listen, none of us wear gloves, but you don't have to really luxuriate in the viscera. Yeah, I watched her jacking intestine, like just like a, like he's he's trying to get all the goo out of the body. It's unsettling.
00:17:55
Speaker
Yeah, this guy, like we do learn quickly, though. Oh, this guy's a sick freak. And which I knew immediately from the Jack at
Exploration of Film's Themes and Music
00:18:02
Speaker
the Urinal. There was just there was no way this guy didn't have something going on upstairs.
00:18:07
Speaker
That's presumably also, yes, what the co-worker saw and immediately knew that this this guy's not going to work out here.
00:18:16
Speaker
Oh my god, yeah, we get to his house though, we meet his girlfriend, he dresses his girlfriend dresses like my wife, which I thought was fun. Yeah, inexplicably a good looking girlfriend, for sure.
00:18:29
Speaker
We've got something to offer and it's a lot of goopy jars of like fetuses and If you're not going to good looking, the way to get a hot girlfriend is to have other qualities that will attract someone such as easy access to body parts.
00:18:53
Speaker
Mm hmm.
00:18:55
Speaker
there you go. And meanwhile, the the music. Garrett, we have to talk about the music. mah It made the movie. It really did. was incredible.
00:19:07
Speaker
So at at points, it felt like... So I had a Geocities website back in the day for for Sailor Moon fandom, for my Sailor Moon fandom. Oh my God. And I swear, i like it this music sounded at points exactly like the MIDI files that I had on my website.
00:19:29
Speaker
That's fair. like I think at the beginning, it did sound more like MIDI files, but as the movie progresses... It was Angry Hornets. Yeah. Well, no, it became very tender piano music. It almost was like Twin Peaks.
00:19:42
Speaker
Yes. the juxtaposition of like these really beautiful, tinkly scores over the horrific shit that's happening... Was a lovely contrast. I would buy the vinyl of this soundtrack and listen to it for pleasure.
00:19:59
Speaker
like this is No, not the parts where it sounded like angry hornets buzzing in my ears. those That was deeply unpleasant. Because along with the MIDI files and the piano, there was the angry hornet section.
00:20:13
Speaker
i don't even remember i'm wondering also we watched this in two different places i watched it from the internet archive so archive.org and i i'm curious if we if it is possible we got different cuts maybe i don't know i don't remember the horn i didn't clock the hornet noises because the scores were so beautiful throughout
00:20:36
Speaker
It was always when there was a lot of gross shit going on on screen, so you might have just been a little distracted. i was, yeah. ah she So she's bathing in bloody water and having a lovely time.
00:20:50
Speaker
This is less inexplicable than the fact that she is wearing sunglasses in the bathtub. That was the part that corn-fused me. I thought it was a little bright and she's having a little sexy time bath.
00:21:04
Speaker
And what appears to be, it sounds like she's listening to a podcast about phobias. So she's the original just gal taking a bath, listen to her little crime podcast.
00:21:16
Speaker
Yeah, the guy was talking about phobias and desensitization as a technique to ah get over a phobia. You know, you you put the spider...
00:21:27
Speaker
Closer to the person and then closer to the person and then you put the spider in the hand of the person who's afraid of spiders and they won't be afraid of spiders anymore. And I guess like this is supposed to be a metaphor for how you end up um banging a corpse is desensitization.
00:21:47
Speaker
I love that as she's in the bath, we get a little modest butt nudity. night Nice tush. As the camera pans around, we see ah she wasn't listening to a podcast after all in 1987.
00:21:59
Speaker
ah Husband watching, or boyfriend watching, I'll just refer to him through this movie as our hero. Our hero is watching television, pantsless, with a shirt on, just poo-baroned it on the bed. Man poo-baron.
00:22:11
Speaker
And we immediately immediately notice things are off with this man. ah He has a femur attached to the bedpost. Yeah, the little details of the set designer are what really sells it here. I i loved some of the details. You know when they hang the corpse on the wall for a while?
00:22:30
Speaker
And then the corpse is gone later and the slime trail on the wall left behind in the exact sort of silhouette of the... hit I screamed at the corpse. Like him looking over to see the corpse was gone and we see this the wall stain was the hardest. Like the two times I laughed hardest were barehanded guts and the corpse stain. had to pause it because I was losing my shit so hard at that stain. Oh man, I laughed.
00:23:04
Speaker
I'll tell you the the part i laughed the hardest at. We're getting up on it pretty pretty quickly. Oh fuck, I hope it's not the next scene.
00:23:13
Speaker
No, it was not. This is where is the only thing that really like upset, upset me. um Cause most of this stuff is trying very, very hard to shock me. And the the harder it was trying, the more hilarious I found it instead. yeah ah But they do show The actual footage of slaughtering and skinning a rabbit for... and This was real footage, apparently. Real footage, yeah. Of of getting rabbit meat.
00:23:49
Speaker
And... uh i immediately was like well i'm a vegetarian now thanks thanks garrett already already got by the way a chicken for my meal um for the weekend for when i get married but apparently i'm vegetarian now so thank you yeah i made a note to remind myself to ask you if i can switch to like a vegan lasagna or something um or do i need to provide my own now because yeah yeah the account's already into the caterer garrett i can't just get you our delicious
00:24:19
Speaker
ah ah mushroom ravioli ah vegetarian option. It's too late. Yeah, that was an upsetting
Ethical Concerns and Humor in Shocking Scenes
00:24:28
Speaker
thing. Like, it did, because you see the bunny be scared. You see its throat get slit. You see a drain to flood. It don't like it. The skinning of the bunny. It was graphic. If you are bothered by animal death, which it's not done in a, like, mean, it's disgusting, but it's not done in a distasteful way. Yeah, it's very, I mean, I assume this is how they really do it, and it, it,
00:24:53
Speaker
didn't look like they were torturing it or anything just that this is the way it is done was yeah a little documentary like the way it was shot like just like a guy was showing you how they clean a rabbit after it but seems like something that pita might show to be like see see this is what happens this is how bunnies get killed don't you want to be a vegetarian now yes pita yes i do A bunch of the video nasty stuff, there are quite a few that um are banned because of things like this. Like anna like animal cruelty on film. See, I'm okay with banning that.
00:25:29
Speaker
Do not do animal cruelty. That's bad. Well, I'm sure somebody ate this rabbit. Yeah, that's... I'm theoretically... okay with that that is ethical enough filmmaking for me this was this was the worst cannibal holocaust isn't that the one where they like the turtle yeah that poor turtle um i felt equal bad for the rabbit to be honest this was part that had that had hornet noises underneath it to to really upset
00:26:02
Speaker
yeah That clock's why I didn't catch the hornets Because I was too busy like oh my god I need the lasagna now I can't have whatever I ordered This is supposed to be His memories I believe Of like seeing his Kill a bunny And that's why That's why he now um Fucks corpses Don't worry though Spoiler alert Things end up okay for the rabbit by the end
00:26:33
Speaker
Yeah, he's alive. He's good by the end. He's happy. Hmm. Remember? Did you miss that part where he's alive now? Yes. Yes, I did. We'll get there.
00:26:46
Speaker
um So we watch an apple picking, two to bros picking apples. Yeah, you go from one of the grossest things I've ever seen on film to possibly the even the second grossest, maybe even more gross thing of this guy's socks and sandals combo.
00:27:05
Speaker
That's the worst. It's pretty bad. didn't even clock that. I just like that we're hearing like, it's almost like we're transported to America in this one. Like we're hearing patriotic music. This guy's fiddling with a Yeah. So we see this guy picking apples in his backyard apple tree, which presumably like he wanted, but he looks more disgusted picking apples than Then I was watching a rabbit get skinned. Like he has this stank faced look like he is so grossed out for some reason.
00:27:45
Speaker
Hey, by picking apples. He's a fellow indoor kid. As I watched this with my wife, she suggested we should go apple picking. Probably had a similar face to that man doing the actual picking.
00:27:55
Speaker
I went apple picking a couple weeks ago. It was delightful. i love it. It's one of my favorite fall activities. Then you get to take the apples home and make an apple pie, Garrett. delightful. can them at the store and apple pie them.
00:28:10
Speaker
No. And I don't have to drive an hour outside a town to an apple orchard. Listen, the apple orchard I went to also had cannons where you could load the apple in and shoot it at targets.
00:28:23
Speaker
That's not worth it to you? No. Wow. wow i want a bare hand guts into a sack on the side of the road. Does that have that? It did not.
00:28:35
Speaker
Does it have a corpse playground where I can where you can lick the slime off where I can lick the eye sockets corpse? No, it doesn't. Anyway, so while this guy's picking apples, his neighbor is sitting in the backyard, casually listening to patriotic circus music on the radio.
00:28:54
Speaker
ah while holding a gun and trying to shoot a bird. Which he does, and there's no sound effects for this section whatsoever. it is- the the music is clearly diegetic. It's clearly coming from the radio, because when we cut to the neighbor that's picking apples,
00:29:13
Speaker
the the sound goes down in volume. So they wanted it to be clear that this is where this terrible music is coming from. But there is no other sound effects.
00:29:23
Speaker
When he ah shoots the bird, ah when he realizes, whoops, I shot my neighbor, aw, beans, I gotta wheelbarrow him out of here.
00:29:34
Speaker
No sound effects for the wheelbarrow, nothing. It is bizarre. If you accidentally shot me, do you think you could wheelbarrow me? I bet i yeah but I don't know if you could.
00:29:46
Speaker
I could probably push the wheelbarrow because that's got some, you know, it's got wheels and I can really lean into it. I don't think I could get you into the wheelbarrow. That's the part that seems tricky to me.
00:29:59
Speaker
I would be blessed if you were my accidental murder. Aww. You'd be so light. you'd be so light i It'd be such an easy, clean transport to wherever I'm going to, to the bog I'm going to dump you in. the thing. I recognize that I am super murderable.
00:30:15
Speaker
However, my hair gets everywhere. I will leave so much evidence behind. You will never find it all. The cops are very quickly going to be able to ID you as the killer. My hair will be on everything you own.
00:30:32
Speaker
Well, it's a good thing, though, that this movie isn't about that. We never see that man again as we are transported to a bog to... Yeah. The detective who is... Well, first I have to point out that there was an agonizing 16 seconds, which is an eternity in film time, of the owner of the cleaning company answering the phone, giving a few...
00:31:00
Speaker
the Uh-huh. And then just hanging up. As he presumably receives the call that they need to come out here and get this corpse.
00:31:11
Speaker
It felt like an eternity. It felt longer than the freaking pee shots. Just watching this fat-faced man mm-hmm.
00:31:25
Speaker
um This is a moment that really helps you appreciate Annie Potts work in Ghostbusters as Jermaine. true. true yeah It could have been a lifeless role. Yeah.
00:31:36
Speaker
You can make answering a phone look real boring or really delightful. And this man, you went for you for the boring one. Yeah, they they really screwed up because Annie Potts was around and available.
00:31:51
Speaker
She was off doing you know Pretty in Pink or whatever at that point. And she could have taken a trip over to Germany to done a real like, treated this like Ghostbusters. So ah they're at a little creek and the detective's like, okay, we're done here. Fish the body out. i don't give a fuck.
00:32:10
Speaker
Like he did not analyze this body at all. he's he He says we're done here. or whatever, and then they fish the body out and put it into garbage bags.
00:32:23
Speaker
Never does he analyze it for any evidence. The cops are not going to notice that this body went missing, Garrett, because they don't care.
00:32:34
Speaker
all.
00:32:37
Speaker
Cop in Germany! Germany, is this what your cops are like? I love when our hero gets... A lot American cops had a reputation for being lazy, but my goodness, you're even going to take a single shred of evidence. You're not even going to catalog anything.
00:32:52
Speaker
You're not taking a single picture. If they had to investigate every bog body they came across... ah There's real crimes happening. Just because it has a bullet hole in its skull, you think that means we need to what?
00:33:09
Speaker
What? Make a case out of it? This is the not my problem bog. It's a great place to dump your corpse. In which case, Wheelbarrow Man lucked out picking this bog.
00:33:22
Speaker
I assume this was Wheelbarrow Man's bog. The rules of filmmaking leads me to believe, you know, the, was is it? The Kalashnikov effect where the two images in sequence ah add up to a greater meaning than they would separately.
00:33:39
Speaker
um The body has decomped severely, though. So there's no way to really know if it's the same guy or not. Because the original guy kind of looked like Michael Shannon and the corpse looked like nothing.
00:33:55
Speaker
Yeah, it is mostly bone and slime. lot of goo. guts Guts, bone, and slime. Guts, bone, and slime. Yeah. It still has one eyeball, which I found to be miraculous. There's no skin left on the thing, ah but it's still got one perfectly good eyeball.
00:34:15
Speaker
Eat your carrots, folks.
00:34:19
Speaker
I think kit when he loaded that body up into that car and you get to watch our hero have a moment of, you know what? Actually, I think I'm going to take him home. I love like they that was you could say maybe there was a little time padding and his sitting there filming his face.
00:34:36
Speaker
But that's an important moment to see in a man's life when he's like, actually, i think my wife's going to love this. I think I just got her the perfect anniversary present. um My anniversary is coming up and this gave me a couple ideas.
00:34:49
Speaker
Oh, that's beautiful. Yeah. A good thing the cops don't want this body because it ain't there no more. It's basically the lost and found bog. You take, take, a take a body, leave a body.
00:35:03
Speaker
The combination of the smell of decay and the, the bog slime must be horrific. Putrid. Like this is
00:35:15
Speaker
this Like, however bad we thought Angelina Jolie smelled while Antonio Banderas was having sex with her in the horse and buggy times, Bogbody beats that.
00:35:27
Speaker
ah i don't care I don't care if he was getting a bath in that bog. That stink follows you. Yeah, well, and the slime can't help. It can't help, right?
00:35:39
Speaker
It didn't look like scent-free slime. It looked like there definitely was ah there was an aroma to that goop. So, ah yeah. the He brings the corpse home, and she's, of course, delighted. You're never going believe this.
00:35:56
Speaker
I got you a gift. What is it?
00:36:01
Speaker
Bod body. We're 30 minutes in and it is time to party kit. it is Yes. We are going to caress that slime. We are going to, um, I don't know.
00:36:17
Speaker
I'm confused about the the the dildo situation. Garrett, can you please explain to me exactly how this worked? Yeah, she basically took the leg off a table, put a condom on it, and put it where a corpse penis would be.
00:36:34
Speaker
you're telling me they didn't already own a dildo? They had to use a table leg. It looked like a table leg. I don't think that when it was anything else. like I think it was like the take the leg to like a um i don't know a table you'd have in front of the couch.
00:36:48
Speaker
Like a coffee table. A coffee table. A short table. Because it's not as long as like a dining table. And that would explain the condom. Because I was very confused why. If you're willing to lick the slime off the ribs of a body...
00:37:08
Speaker
ah there's no reason why you should be putting a condom on. So yes, if if you're worried about splinters, that would make much more sense why you put a condom on it.
00:37:20
Speaker
Gotta be safe. yeah Yep, yep, yep. ah Also, a time of AIDS. so That's what they're... They don't care, Garrett! They're not even wearing gloves while ah scooping guts into bag.
00:37:36
Speaker
They washed their hands after they Purelled.
00:37:42
Speaker
it kills 99% of germs. Oh, well, in that case... get this The sex scene is really tender. Like in the same way that I think, um i I do truly believe that Teton is like a very tender, sweet movie in its core.
00:38:03
Speaker
This is trying to do something similar where they they present me, you're not just watching in real time a guy humping and pumping on a
Director's Intent and Audience Reaction
00:38:11
Speaker
corpse. You are watching a very beautifully crafted slow motion editing editing extravaganza with sort beautiful piano piano tickling. Sort dreamy, gauzy little effect here and when there's a lot of licking of the slime when you see her tits rub across the skeleton yep just tickling those ribs with your nips oh my god it's beautiful oh my god
00:38:42
Speaker
Yeah, so she's on the dildo, which is in the corpse, and he's doing her from behind, presumably in the butt, so she's getting DP'd partially by a corpse, which is and fun. That's fun.
00:38:57
Speaker
um Is it? That's the first thing you've said is fun in this movie. No, it's not. It was actually strangely boring. It kind of went on too long You're wrong, wrong, wrong. They're showing something I've never seen. Let me linger in it. There's too many of these where it's like, ah, the corpse scene was only...
00:39:16
Speaker
60 seconds they let me live in this corpse room for a while they let me maybe i needed a bigger variety like the fourth time you've seen someone lick slime off a skull you know it gets a little old maybe they should have tried some more positions uh i just felt like there was some essential laziness here okay so garrick can i tell you My favorite thing to think about with this scene is eventually she's she's done with the corpse and it's the boy's turn, our hero.
00:39:48
Speaker
And our hero starts licking the eye socket, sucks the eyeball out of the socket. Very grotesque. But I love to think about the person who watched this movie.
00:40:00
Speaker
who had zero issues up until this point, and then at that point thought, that's gay. You think there was someone who thought that? You think there was someone who was like, yeah, whatever, this fine.
00:40:13
Speaker
oh Oh! Oh, no yeah Can I tell you, this movie changes drastically when you picture our hero as maybe being i won't say exactly this person but let's say maybe house speaker mike johnson
00:40:43
Speaker
mike johnson's wife would also leave him if he stopped bringing home uh rotten corpses for her to fuck ah might have to censor that. I don't know what's going to happen there. Allegedly. There, I said allegedly, so it's fine.
00:40:59
Speaker
They obviously didn't do that. I don't know. Release the file. um Release the files! Let us know. Here's the thing. Garrett, so in in college, in my theater directing class, I directed Kane's play Blasted.
00:41:22
Speaker
And that is a notoriously over-the-top, gross, ah intentionally um provocative play that involves like somebody eats a baby and there's like masturbating and cuddling a corpse and like terrible, terrible things in this play.
00:41:45
Speaker
And one of the things I realized quickly about Between like the first time had staged a scene and then showed it to the class and then you know was was noodling on it. I had held back in the first iteration.
00:42:06
Speaker
the first iteration I had i had had ah my my lead actor facing away from the audience while he was ah masturbating and reading the Bible at the same time.
00:42:23
Speaker
And listen, I didn't write the play. And I realized like... ah By by showing showing even that tiny bit of restraint, right i I was doing a disservice to the material and to the the very point of the work, which was to shock right and to make people uncomfortable.
00:42:51
Speaker
And what I, I like, so I restaged it so that, I mean, he's, his dick's still in his pants. I'm not going to like, you know, do anything. You're not to Gallagher the front row and have a splash zone. Yeah, exactly. But, uh, you know, ah he's instead, ah facing towards the audience with his hand down his pants and I, you know, to give them the full experience. And I realized that like,
00:43:14
Speaker
That was important. That if you hold back even a little bit, you are wasting everyone's time. And I felt this way during this section.
00:43:27
Speaker
And it wasn't until the very end of the movie that I really felt like, okay, they're finally going for it. They're going so far that we've reached the next transcendent level here.
00:43:40
Speaker
Because this, by making it, you know, less graphic than it could have been, I felt like it was just wasting my time. Like, don't pussyfoot around. If your goal is to shock me, shock me!
00:43:56
Speaker
And so, like, they thought... You got there, though, right? We got there eventually, but it took 65 minutes to get there, and it did feel like it wasted my time for 65 minutes by not pushing the envelope enough.
00:44:13
Speaker
Like... Don't show me the same shot of someone licking somebody's slime face skull ah multiple times. Up the ante. Keep building.
00:44:24
Speaker
I genuinely, like, I think this movie, the thing it provided me, because I do think this movie was insanely thrilling, and that it had me on edge a lot, because once it showed the rabbit thing, it really felt like nothing was going to be off limits on what they would be a willing to show me. Yes. So...
00:44:46
Speaker
I was very tense during multiple scenes, especially one later with a cat where i was like, oh my God, are we really just going to do it? um which But here's the thing is like, I felt like that promise was not fulfilled for most of the movie. Like you, you showed me the grossest, most horrific thing I, like I'd seen. And then you pulled back so hard and spent a lot of time wasting my time.
00:45:11
Speaker
Like, here's an example. So they they show after they they've screwed the corpse that they're throwing a big piece of meat on a pan and the meat's too big for the pan.
00:45:22
Speaker
This is red, juicy, steaky meat. There's no goddamn way it came off of that corpse. and I assumed his ass. I assumed we're eating the corpse's ass.
00:45:33
Speaker
No way. We've seen everything that this flesh has to offer and no part of it is red and juicy. and He had pan. We did not see his, his, his luscious. to will I, I, I'm willing to believe. You want to waste my time with long shots of them eating it. Like, Ooh, isn't it? Isn't it so gross that they're cannibals?
00:45:55
Speaker
No, make it look as putrid as the rest of that corpse and then show them eating it. And then i will be freaked out. Okay, I'll chalk that up to budgetary issues.
00:46:07
Speaker
But I'm saying if you're willing to suspend your disbelief and sit there and watch these freaks eat bog meat while they're like, I don't care how well seasoned the mashed taters are, that bog meat is going to make you so sick.
00:46:21
Speaker
Oh, 100%. But then gross me out by making it look gross. That's not hard. Put some food coloring in there. He had a luscious, juicy red ass. And I'm willing to... No, didn't.
00:46:32
Speaker
He... God damn it. Corpsey was looking fine.
Protagonist's Downfall and Personal Stories
00:46:37
Speaker
No, he was not. Corpsey was pretty. I liked Corpsey. Don't you?
00:46:44
Speaker
Say what you want about any other actor. You pull a corpse out of a creek after a couple of weeks and ain't no way it's ass looks that good. He was a butterface.
00:46:56
Speaker
He was but a butterface. Everything was luscious and juicy but his face. You're too caught up in his gooey socket, empty socket, drippy, juicy luscious ass. If there had been even a tiny bit of skin left on that corpse, I might have believed it but there was We ate it.
00:47:15
Speaker
There was a tiny bit.
00:47:19
Speaker
I love... I love... You know, we see... We see homie get fired. And I want to ask you this in your version of the movie. Cause what I watched, this was the only part of the movie. They didn't do this during that scene. He's clearly getting fired.
00:47:37
Speaker
No subtitles for me dropped the subtitles entirely. Oh no. I have the subtitles. And what's funny is he gets home and has to say he's fired. And I was like, well, I guess I have to just take his word for what happened.
00:47:51
Speaker
But he also doesn't seem like a reliable narrator. No, he is not. So um what happens is um
00:48:03
Speaker
his coworkers are like, what the hell smells so bad in the locker room? Is it you? What the hell, dude? And then he's like, And they're like, no, check, you know, our protagonist's locker.
00:48:17
Speaker
And they open it up and his hazmat suit is in there and it hasn't been washed because that's how bad this dude is at protocol. So they're like, he's late and he doesn't even wash his hazmat suit.
00:48:29
Speaker
Like this guy is irresponsible and he sucks and I hate working with him. So they drag him up to the boss in a very humiliating way. And ah the boss is like, I gotta go with what, you know, my foreman says. I'm trusting him on this.
00:48:47
Speaker
fired. Get the hell out of here. I'm wondering if we did actually watch different cuts of this movie. Maybe I'm just like misremembering some of it. um In high school, I had a friend who wore the same mud vein shirt to gym every day.
00:49:04
Speaker
And I think he washed it once and it was at the end of the year. You didn't have gym uniform? No, you could wear what you like. And he wore a mud vein shirt. And I don't remember him stinking, but he has to have, right?
00:49:17
Speaker
Was that one of those things where we were just stinky high school boys? and You were probably all stinky high school boys and it was all lost in the morass of stinkiness. Also, he wasn't... That mud vein shirt did not have um ah intestines smeared all over it at some point, so that probably helps.
00:49:36
Speaker
Yeah, I think these guys were just being too sensitive. You know, like, yeah he got a little guts on him. So what? We all did. Did he forget to wash it? Yeah, he had other stuff on his mind.
00:49:47
Speaker
Corpse is looking good. He's got that mushy juices. Red ass. Like a baboon. Here's the thing, is I imagine that it's not that difficult. Like, this is a ah corpse cleaning...
00:50:00
Speaker
company. Presumably they have like a big machine that cleans your hazmat suits that you just chuck it into and he instead shoved it in his locker. He likes the smell.
00:50:12
Speaker
but Yeah, no, that might be it. And his coworkers did not agree. And it's really funny that he's not in trouble. Like you'd think he'd be in trouble for the fact that he stole an eyeball and a heart from a corpse or that he stole ah an entire corpse.
00:50:28
Speaker
No, No, he's fired just for for regular bad worker behavior. His workstation isn't clean, and he shows up late regularly.
00:50:40
Speaker
the While this is happening, though, the most dreaded thing that could happen in a threesome absolutely we is happening at home. You're worried that your lover is going to fall in love with the person you brought into bed with you.
00:50:56
Speaker
And I'll tell you, Corpse is a generous lover. Absolutely. She starts off reading him a romance novel. does not a hard Does our hero ever let wifey lee read him a romance novel?
00:51:10
Speaker
No, probably not. He doesn't even- Just murder podcasts. Yeah. You just- And then the skull goes down on her. we We didn't see ah him do anything like what corpse he's doing down there. He was down there for ages.
00:51:28
Speaker
Good for you, corpse. The man's got stamina, which I guess helps if you are already dead. I don't know. I guess I don't even know how to talk. doesn't need to come up for air, Garrett.
00:51:39
Speaker
and He doesn't need to come up for air, but he's missing so much. I don't even know if tongue is there. Corpse is really toothy. Yeah, maybe that's what she's into, though. Just the... This is of not a video podcast. I was also confused about the mechanics.
00:51:55
Speaker
Once again, though, I trusted that it worked. They managed to get a red juicy ass and blood out of this thing. They, like, hang it up. Whoopsie was bloody. Yeah, they hang it up and drain blood out of it. And I'm like, how?
00:52:08
Speaker
There's no... way there's still blood in this thing liquid blood not a chance but no this corpsey is the the sexual gift that keeps on giving he can give you whatever you need you need an eyeball to suck out he's got one you need blood or juicy red ass meat he's got you and apparently if you need a tongue so that you can get the ah good head getting ahead
00:52:40
Speaker
corpse he provides good and
00:52:47
Speaker
i dread the day i get a i left you for a corpse letter oh yeah yeah he comes home all shame-faced sandy's fired and she's berating him and telling him he's not you know a real man and you know who's gonna bring home the bacon in this relationship now the The bacon being a dead guy.
00:53:11
Speaker
A dead, dead, dead tush. Yeah. he I mean, he'll just have to find another. He'll just have to kind of wait around the bog. Wait around the bog. I'm sorry. yeah She's not going to put up with that. She's not going to waste the best years of her life. She says with a loser like him.
00:53:29
Speaker
Not when she's got corpsey baby. Don't worry, he moves on fast. He adopts a cat, immediately mortified as a cat owner. My cat was sitting next to me. I'll be honest, the cat left during this scene. and What money did he have to buy a cat and a cat carrier? The man just got fired.
00:53:46
Speaker
And this was a nice cat. This was not a cat he picked up off the street. This cat was... He was clean. clean and well taken care of. Not for long. It was before he saw the letter. So clearly this cat was meant as like a, see honey, I can still bring home nice things for you, even though I lost my job, but it's too little too late.
00:54:09
Speaker
So he feeds the cat some human, I want to say liver, out of one of his jars. um Burns the photo of his girlfriend. And I'm very sorry to say, kills the cat.
00:54:24
Speaker
Which thankfully is not as, not gross like the rabbit. He just puts it in a bag. And then we see him slamming the bag around. We've seen Jason do that to pretty camp ladies multiple times in Friday the 13th.
00:54:41
Speaker
I could deal with that. Garrett, what's the what most upset you've ever been about a breakup? And did, you you know, like, ah what what dumb things ah may you have done?
00:54:54
Speaker
i Probably just a lot of crying. yeah um Probably watched some some sad rom-coms or like, you know, watched. i Really, it would have just been a lot of crying. Oh, I was vegetarian and ate meat.
00:55:08
Speaker
that was That's true. I got broken up with and um ate a chicken sandwich. like I hadn't eaten meat in like a year and a half or something. we're just like, I would have a chicken sandwich. And it was terrible.
00:55:20
Speaker
So there you go. that Was your tummy upset? Were you punishing yourself in some way? I think it was like, nothing matters, eat the chicken. let
00:55:33
Speaker
It's basically the same as murdering a cat, right?
00:55:38
Speaker
I'm sorry to all the cat lovers out there. i do love cats. i It was just a joke. Nobody should kill a cat. um Yeah. ah Well, you know, your your wife once...
00:55:50
Speaker
um left a broken Millennium Falcon on my lawn because the true. That was a pretty good... it was pretty great. um Not my story to tell. It's hers. But I will say like that if you're gonna if you're going to break my heart, I break this the symbolic symbolic like if relationships over Millennium Falcon broken. and Was she crazy?
00:56:14
Speaker
I don't know. She did smash a Millennium Falcon on your lawn. She did apologize. She immediately texted me and apologized. Yeah, this wasn't, you probably had to deal with more Falcon pieces than you wanted to.
00:56:27
Speaker
Nah, the roommate took care of it. He knew it was his responsibility. Yeah. Yeah, that's the danger of ah infidelity. Yep, yep, yep. So ah ah he puts the cat corpse above the bath so that the blood can like drip into the bathtub. And there we get to see some penis.
00:56:49
Speaker
We get to see some penis as he's in the bathtub. this was a real pad the runtime with Underwater Dong. Mm-hmm. And I out loud during this scene said, so is this...
00:57:01
Speaker
going to be like bath bomb cat or is this going to be eaten cat? Still unclear. kind of bla Kind of both. He doesn't have money for food. So I think he does need to use it for both.
00:57:14
Speaker
Actually Garrett. Yeah. I guess I didn't really think about it. They're not, neither he nor his girlfriend truly like bathes in blood in the traditional sense of just like filling the bathtub with blood. They don't have that amount of blood.
00:57:27
Speaker
What they do have though is a blood bath bomb. And it seems to be working out for both of them. They both seem very happy. And you know what? Her skin looked magnificent. She looked great.
00:57:39
Speaker
So, you know, maybe there was something to that idea of what's her name that bathed in in the blood of ah virgins um in order to stay forever young and beautiful.
00:57:57
Speaker
My wife left during this scene. she she was She said she felt like it couldn't escalate past what we've already seen. She was wrong, and I did go tell her what she missed.
00:58:09
Speaker
Yeah, she was very wrong. Yeah, this is the long, dark night of the soul here. This guy's like, I'm sad. I've, I've been in the bath with my blood bath bomb. I ate a cat or whatever.
00:58:22
Speaker
I guess I'll go to the movies. and don't know where he's got money to go to the movies. And this movie is so desperate to pad the runtime that I had, we had to watch the guy in front of him at the movies, buy a ticket, beers and snacks.
00:58:39
Speaker
The entire exchange, including giving change. It was horrible. And then they show us the movie movie. Like they filmed the movie that we watch. Like this is a separate movie they filmed. Well, we're not watching it from the perspective of the theater.
00:58:56
Speaker
We are just now watching a separate. Yes. Like horary snuffy kind of movie. Yes, and this movie's sound design is even worse than the original movie's sound design, because I guess they didn't want to deal with having to write any dialogue or anything for the second movie, so it's a lot of, like, uh,
00:59:20
Speaker
uh, and then her going, like, uh, uh, uh. They used ah audio from a different video, Nasty. Oh, really? The movie itself was not, but I want to say it was from Fulci's Zombie. um the I believe I read that, where they used another video, Nasty, like for the screaming and some different sounds, was an actual another movie.
00:59:46
Speaker
It's very bad. And i wrote down, and I'm not joking here, I miss the piss shots. but
00:59:57
Speaker
I was far more offended by wasting my time with watching this guy watch the movie and look even more bored than me than was offended by the piss shots.
01:00:10
Speaker
i I do like this scene that shows that this man is so desensitized. that Clearly very disturbing movie where this woman is being tortured and they're slicing up her breasts. he's just like so bored he leaves.
01:00:24
Speaker
Yes. I have to mention my favorite part though of the movie within the movie, which is when he's like, I'm trying to get her shirt off, but I've got a a a knife in one hand. ah How can I do this? And like a normal person would use the knife to open the shirt.
01:00:40
Speaker
No, he is not that smart. He puts the knife handle in her mouth like, hey, ah basically hold hold this for a second so that he can use his hands to rip open her shirt and then takes the knife back out when he's done so that he can cut her up.
01:00:57
Speaker
It is the stupidest fucking thing I've ever seen.
01:01:03
Speaker
I think it must have been because they had a fake knife that would not have actually like cut through blouse. um And so, you know, rather than like ah do literally anything to so to to swap that knife for a real knife just for the cutting of the fabric or whatever, they were just like, nah, hold this so that I can rip it with my hands.
01:01:28
Speaker
He could have put it in his own mouth and just tore it on the buttons open. Yeah. No, he's like, hold this. hey Hey, can you hang on to this for a sec? Thank you. I love, i mean, there's a little bit that happens. We do pad the runtime with some, some dream sequences.
01:01:43
Speaker
So our guy realizes like this movie's not going to do it. I need a prostitute. He, yeah he goes to pick up a prostitute. We don't know what deal he has brokered, but you know, we know it's going to cost more.
01:01:55
Speaker
And that is he is going, he would like to have sex with her in a graveyard. Yes. On brand for our hero. A graveyard that I want to point out may be on fire. Like their smoke machine was clearly supposed to look like fog because a cemetery always has fog rolling across it. But it looked like the cemetery was on fire and this man simply did not care.
01:02:16
Speaker
I thought when he sat her and we like, we pull her skirt up and see her ass sitting on the gravestone. I thought it was smoldering. i thought she was starting to be cooked.
01:02:27
Speaker
Yes. It's just too heavy of a fog. yeah Too heavy fog. ah And ah he can't get it up. And she makes a grave mistake. A grave mistake. Yeah. I think this must be a thing that men think like, like as a, like some deep seated psychological fear.
01:02:45
Speaker
that men will not be able to get it up with a hooker and she will make fun of him for it, which I cannot imagine that any hooker would do. That's not the kind of thing that gets you a big tip at the end of the night. You're in the service industry.
01:02:59
Speaker
They're not going to make fun of It's fine. Don't worry about it, guys. But this one obviously does. So of course he has to kill her and now he can get it up just okay. And, uh... But comes so good he takes too long of a nap in the graveyard. And...
01:03:16
Speaker
This is the only scene that like goes into like overly silly to me. I think everything- cuts off the- the great So the graveyard keeper comes in and is like, what the hell? There's a guy in a dead hooker asleep here.
01:03:32
Speaker
I guess I should do something about it. And ah our hero wakes up, grabs the shovel, and- Chops the dude's head.
01:03:43
Speaker
One big swing. This is the sharpest shovel ever created by him. Oh, it's like a samurai sword. This is a Hattori Hanzo. Shovel. yeah
01:03:54
Speaker
Little known fact, he also made one shovel. and we see the tongue waggling. Yeah, he cuts his head in half. ah and hot dog style so that like the jaw the top part of the jaw is like flapping or the bottom part it doesn't matter the point is it looks hilarious we've entered evil dad territory I did laugh I enjoyed it but I think everything else in this movie was presented so realistic and serious realistic ish and serious
01:04:30
Speaker
it was a I mean, I do think the movie was shot as a dark comedy. I don't think they thought they made a serious movie here. But... It's now time for him to contemplate a caterpillar and... ah Frolicks with guts.
01:04:45
Speaker
Think about Jesus. Two minutes and 30 seconds of frolicking and making the most hilarious sounds. You've never seen a grown man frolic in a field of daisies like you've seen this going, yeah!
01:05:01
Speaker
It's a dream sequence. He's picturing a time when he was happy and he likes the field. Oh, is this a dream sequence? I thought maybe this was, this was real. Like he was so happy. He just killed two people that he went and frolicked in a field.
01:05:15
Speaker
No, I think he killed two people and then he went home and had a great sleep and like really was picturing like a happy time in his head. Like he was like, he's happy now. Cause like when he was at the movies having a terrible time and like, but this is something that brought him so much joy. He's like almost at peace to the point that this is where he's going to commit. yeah oh This is where he's going to off himself so that he can die in perfect bliss.
01:05:43
Speaker
Um, Yeah, I do have to briefly mention that that in the dream sequence, he was there was a hot lady that he was tossing a skull back and forth with and swinging entrails around. Like, bro has an imagination sure. It's a great head, and it is truly like they're having a catch.
01:06:00
Speaker
They're playing catch. Dad issues. Dad wouldn't play catch. Find a hot lady that'll crawl up with corpse. Yeah, dad only kills rabbits. We get to the suicide scene, which is incredible.
Climactic Scenes and Film's Impact
01:06:12
Speaker
I think, do you think he and misunderstood autoerotic asphyxiation? he thought like, obviously dying is the best cum you'll ever have. And he didn't realize that that's like a specific thing that comes from losing oxygen. So he was just like, yeah, I'll just stab myself right as I'm coming.
01:06:28
Speaker
And like, ha ha, it'll be great. um Or do you think that like he was hoping that as he was stabbing himself, blood would shoot out of his penis?
01:06:38
Speaker
Do you think that was the goal from the beginning? hit To describe it to the viewers that are never going to watch this movie, the listeners that are never going to watch this, he is mostly clothed.
01:06:51
Speaker
He is holding a knife to his belly and he's rolling back and forth, like really like building up the courage. And he's like, he's crying. He's holding the knife to his belly. And then after three or four rolls, he rolls back over and we are now face to face with his rock hard penis.
01:07:07
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because he's jerking it. Well, yeah. Time to stab myself while I jerk it. And I wish you could have heard the the sounds he made when he frolicked was the sound i made that knife entered his belly and the ejaculate shot.
01:07:27
Speaker
Shot into the air. And blood. It's blood and cum. This was the moment where truly the promise of the movie paid off, where like I was talking about how it needed to go further It needed to stop wasting my time and get to the good stuff.
01:07:45
Speaker
This was where you finally did it. You embraced the promise of the movie. um They reused some of the rabbit footage, which I hated.
01:07:58
Speaker
Well, they're but where they're showing us the entire scene again, but in reverse, where the rabbit is getting his skin put back on and his throat unslit, and he gets to be a happy rabbit at the end. I had not thought of it that way. I i was just so mad that they were padding by reusing footage in a 70-minute movie that i did not notice that it was ah that the sequences were in reverse.
01:08:26
Speaker
It was just full and reverse, the exact same scene. And Jorg Boudre... Boudre... Boudre? I looked how to say his name so long ago, I forgot how to say it. But he really did hit us with just the coup de grace at the end of this movie. the We're watching this guy jizz. He's shooting blood. He's shooting cum. The rabbit skin's getting put back on.
01:08:47
Speaker
Just a fucking thrill to the senses. Absolutely. Absolutely. And then the best needle drop ending this movie could have possibly had. This was so funny. This is an actual funny, hilarious way to end this movie.
01:09:01
Speaker
go ahead and them, Garrett. We see his grave. We see that he's been freshly buried. And then, goddamn, we see a shovel with a high heel dig the dirt, just kick right into the dirt.
01:09:15
Speaker
Credits. His wife is back. Back. This is exactly... He knew this was the only way to get her back was to be the corpse that she loved. Turn yourself into the man that your girlfriend leaves you for.
01:09:31
Speaker
and if it's a corpse, well... That's your option, baby. Oh my God. I love it so much. That was so, that was so fun. This was such a fun movie. Like I honestly, so funny.
01:09:45
Speaker
I wish we could have made Anthony watch this one since he was the one had to do. Cause I mean, I know this was a famous, this is kind of a cult movie. I had heard of it. I'd even started this movie at one point on shutter like a year ago.
01:10:00
Speaker
and don't have Shudder right now, so I used archive.org. It's there for you for free if you want to watch Necromantic. We're definitely going to have to watch the sequel at some point because i hear it is very fun. And it's obviously higher budget.
01:10:13
Speaker
um They clearly spent the all of the budget they did have in this on the effects, and I'm so happy that they did because that is by far the most fun part is seeing all the gooey-gory bits that they lovingly created for people to lick.
01:10:32
Speaker
Lick, suck, and fuck.
01:10:37
Speaker
This is such a yucky, it fun, stupid... It's so yucky. It was only 70 minutes. Trying so hard to shock you, but also will sometimes ah bore you because it did not know what to do to fill the time in between shocking you.
01:10:56
Speaker
I disagree. This was... This was ah a 24 is a ghost story where you watch a woman eat a pie for seven minutes, except you're watching You're what everything you're watching linger in this movie is just so unsettling. Like in that you're just watching a woman eat a pie and this like, you know, what am I doing? Bright red, juicy butt meat, I guess.
01:11:18
Speaker
I'm watching a burned up cat with a switchblade stuck in its belly while a man just sits underwater thinking about how much his life sucks.
01:11:29
Speaker
Yep. like Miss my girlfriend. Also, I want to say this is an incredible poster, by the way. It is a woman with a logo The font for the title is cool as hell.
01:11:41
Speaker
Yeah, this is one that I am not going to forget this movie, and I had a very good time. I i mean, i don't want the poster as much as I want the French cat people poster, but it's a pretty good poster.
01:11:56
Speaker
Garrett, let's do this thing. It's time to get serious. Were you around? It's so hard to say.
01:12:08
Speaker
Were you... Were you aroused scale of one to five?
01:12:17
Speaker
No. mean... No.
01:12:23
Speaker
no i mean no And that, you know, no, it's not my, not my, not my thing, but ah you know, I understand that maybe it's somebody's like people who are into this kind of thing don't have a lot of movies to choose from.
01:12:41
Speaker
So true. And I would much rather you express it by watching a movie and you're going rather than actually stealing a body from a crime scene um to to use as your threesome partner.
01:12:58
Speaker
So um mean, I'd love to have one, but this is just like this ain't it. and that being said as far as ah halloween themed threesome movie i think we nailed it i think we absolutely nailed it the perfect one but yeah i'm gonna i think even one is it's too generous generous i'll go like i mean honestly i feel like unless you go a negative number then it's it looks bad
01:13:31
Speaker
yeah and Yeah, because like yeah they showed you boobs, but those boobs are um ah rippling up against ah ah slimy ribs of a ah but bog skeleton. Yeah, and I mean, even though his butt meat that I'm pretty sure they ate looked tender. Mm-hmm, mm-hmm. didn't not for didn't do nothing for me neither. Mm-hmm.
01:14:00
Speaker
Yeah, so I'll just say a negative number. I mean, a negative 1,000. Negative infinity. Just negative. not Just negative.
01:14:11
Speaker
for me. not here to kink shame, but maybe this one deserves a little kink shame. I mean, I am here to kink shame you if your kink is to literally, not like, haha, role play, but like literally suck an eyeball out of the corpse.
01:14:28
Speaker
Yeah. I that did not nobody involved can consent to to having their eyeballs sucked out postmortem. Though that being said, like, I've, you know, had to put thought into do I want to be buried? Do I want to be cremated?
01:14:42
Speaker
course. If this is where my corpse ends up. Whatever, I guess. So instead of donating to science, you're donating to love. That's beautiful. Love.
01:14:57
Speaker
See, tender. And it was, like I said, a tender love. ah tender love. Was it? Yeah.
01:15:05
Speaker
yeah
01:15:10
Speaker
All right. Well, ah let's get what I'm sure is going to be a very different number. oh Were you thrilled, Garrett? Five, five, five. They showed me things I've never seen.
01:15:22
Speaker
i was mortified at the bunny. i was horrified at what was going to happen with the cat. ah Best case scenario for us as far as the cat goes. Not the cat, but I'd like to think that cat got to continue a nice life afterwards.
01:15:37
Speaker
It looked like a very happy cat. I was scared and sad for the prostitute. I was... Yeah, five. Five. i I'm not willing to go five because there were enough moments where I was bored and I was like, get to the point already.
01:15:56
Speaker
I'm sorry, but watching another man watch a movie and him being bored watching a movie is boring for me. Maybe I'm just not... um intellectual enough for european cinema garrett maybe the problem is me and my short american attention span uh you know that that could be it i'm not sophisticated enough to truly appreciate um 40 something seconds of of urine streams yeah
01:16:33
Speaker
There's not really a wrong answer, but I'm going to still go five. I'll go i'll go who who four. Four? Still high, but but with moments of of boredom, which it honestly is fairly unforgivable when you've only got 70 minutes of material.
01:16:53
Speaker
It should be one, you know, slam, bam, exciting moment after another.
01:17:01
Speaker
I just want the audience to know i never felt bored, but I think it was because my thoughts continued to linger with the horrific things I had seen and the the his journal methods.
01:17:17
Speaker
i I am more maybe more desensitized, perchance, like the man in the podcast was saying. Yeah. Yeah. yeah The spider got too close to you. you ah now me and the spider, we mean nothing to each other. It's growing eggs in your brain and you actually can hear it talk to you at night and you're in a relationship.
01:17:44
Speaker
So now I get that. Don't talk trash about my beautiful spider relationship. Me and Charlotte are doing great. Some pig.
01:17:58
Speaker
And would you ruin your life for that corpse, Garrett? Corpsy? Yeah. were Corpsy's got a great work ethic. He's a generous lover. No, but I, you know, I would on a friend level like to get to know Corpsy.
01:18:19
Speaker
Corpse does seem like a hell of a guy. I get the feeling that, you know, Corpse would help you move. Corpse would, you know, if you called him middle of the night, you're stranded on the side of the road. Corpse, if he could get in a car and come help you, absolutely would.
01:18:39
Speaker
Corpse is a solid friend. And I appreciate that.
01:18:48
Speaker
We've got similar interests where love going down. Don't love picking apples. a um Love sandals with socks.
01:19:02
Speaker
ah what about the What about that gal? Uh, no, I'm not ruining my life for Corpsey, though. Sorry, I know he would ruin his life for me. I'm not ruining my life for him. I'm not as good of a friend as Corpsey is, and I will just straight up admit that.
01:19:19
Speaker
um Meanwhile, I'm not... Past the end, Garrett. He's your friend way past the end. He's your friend into overtime.
01:19:31
Speaker
um As for the girl, she's... Good looking, but not so good looking that I would have a collection of body parts on display in my dingy, moldy apartment for her.
01:19:49
Speaker
I mean, that's just a level of commitment that I don't think I can really bring myself to to agree to. just... She has pretty high expectations. She's a hard girl to please.
01:20:04
Speaker
And I'm just not looking for someone so high maintenance. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I, yeah. She, I don't know. i I don't know if I fully understand her standards for lover because obviously she was in a relationship. She didn't love being and and then immediately jumped into another one that I'll never understand.
01:20:31
Speaker
how could you not understand it? Corpsey is, as we already said, perfect friend, perfect lover. Yeah. Having not looked up what the sequel's about, I can only hope it follows the two of them onto their next journey.
01:20:47
Speaker
Do you think Corpsey's gonna get jealous when she starts spending more time with her boyfriend's corpse? Oh, that... e I don't know.
01:20:57
Speaker
Corpsey seems understanding. Corpse is like, yeah, as I rot, I can provide you less and less pleasure. So I understand that you need to move on.
01:21:10
Speaker
Do you remember her name? No, none of these people had names to me. Betty. So the sequel says the tagline return of the loving dead Monica,
Anticipation for Sequel and Personal Reflections
01:21:25
Speaker
a corpse. She loves her dilemma intensifies when she meets Mark and considers a normal life with him.
01:21:31
Speaker
She must choose between her affection for Rob and a new relationship. So our hero does return as the corpse, but I does seem like it's a, that heel doesn't belong to his ex. This is a new thing.
01:21:44
Speaker
oh he got a new girlfriend good for her also love the idea of the of the same uh dilemma but in reverse that she has a corpse boyfriend and now may leave him for a living man that's a fun twist oh my god but betty is also in the sequel ah Does she want her boyfriend back?
01:22:10
Speaker
That's my man. Oh my God. I cannot wait. And this one's so much longer. It's ah it's a, it's 103 minutes. So, Hey, I don't know if I can wait till next Halloween, but I'll be watching. This might be ah an on my own time kind of thing.
01:22:30
Speaker
I'm not here to judge. And obviously nobody's ruining their lives for our main character. The absolute biggest loser. Yeah. Real putt of a man. he doesn't know what he wants. He's got his own issues going on.
01:22:48
Speaker
It does seem by the end he's figured it out. Yeah. But bad, bad friend, bad coworker, bad boyfriend. Uh,
01:23:00
Speaker
Can't support it. I do kind of wish that when they were riding back with another body earlier in the movie and you see all of his co-workers like looking sick because they do ride with the corpse in the back.
01:23:12
Speaker
I wish you had seen our hero eating a sandwich or something just like completely unfazed. ah oblivious. You know, maybe the smell wouldn't have been so bad if they had used real body bags as opposed to like the thinnest, crappiest trash bags taped haphazardly together.
01:23:34
Speaker
Also, I don't know Some of them didn't seem as bothered by it as you probably should. So it might be a perfect advertisement for the hefty bags or whatever they had. It would probably off-brand hefty.
01:23:49
Speaker
Either way. i Yeah, we're going into your wedding. did Did you learn anything about relationships from this that you'll be able to incorporate into your real life? Absolutely. Be careful if you add a third.
01:24:01
Speaker
That's ah such an important message. You never know. You got to be careful with this kind of thing that nobody catches feelings. Yeah. Yeah.
01:24:12
Speaker
And you can say, like, I promise I won't, but you never know. You never know regardless of who it is. You never know. You can't. you The heart wants what the heart wants. And so um that's a tough lesson to have to learn that way.
01:24:28
Speaker
um Any other lessons that I learned from this movie? You a might have learned something about like skin and beauty care, but that not really is that doesn't really affect the relationship.
01:24:43
Speaker
I don't need to tell anybody that I have learned of a new bath bomb ah technique that is going to keep me looking ah luscious and beautiful forever.
01:24:55
Speaker
People don't need to know about my secret skincare routine. the makers The creators of this movie are really sitting on a goldmine, though, if they are not releasing necromantic bath bombs.
01:25:07
Speaker
Horror freaks when he's back up. Oh, that's such a good idea. And it's like, got you know, obviously it would turn the bathwater red and maybe smells also decay.
01:25:20
Speaker
like rows and also decay ah To me, you could just have flowers and like I like funeral flowers are just like such a, you know, that's a scent.
01:25:32
Speaker
But I don't know how that's going to going to work there. I don't know. I don't even know where we go from here as far as what we do next. I mean, but I i did mention to you, i found out in the last 10 years, there have been three different erotic movies with the title compulsion.
01:25:49
Speaker
And I think it would be fun to do compulsion three ways. Yeah. I love that idea. We'll try it over easy first and then hard boiled and follow it up with poached.
01:26:02
Speaker
Looking forward to it. Looking forward to your wedding. i am so sorry that this happened to you. I had no idea the extent that this movie was going to go.
01:26:13
Speaker
and don't think either was
Final Thoughts and Light-hearted Banter
01:26:14
Speaker
it. It wasn't, this wasn't presented the first time when we did Teton. that was presented in a way that I thought would be a fun surprise. This one still fun.
01:26:26
Speaker
i don't know. that's on food Is that what you're saying that like, Oh, I didn't mean to with Titan. I meant to be mean to you but this time it was an accident. So I'm supposed to be like less unhappy about it. Is that what you're saying? No. If I had known what I do now, I would have still done it.
01:26:46
Speaker
Yeah, that's exactly what I would have guessed. A hundred percent. I hope I'm not demoted in my ranking of the the folks standing up with you at the altar. Garrett, you'll be lucky if I let you in the door. going to put up a bouncer, show him your picture, and say, do not let this man in.
01:27:09
Speaker
ah Also, just show him a picture of Corpsey just in case because you don't want him coming in and ruin it. Yeah, I really don't. It'd be so embarrassing to have him at the wedding. Oh, you thought your ex showing up was bad.
01:27:24
Speaker
All right, everybody. Kit's got wedding things to do. We got to get out of here. Hey, wish Kit a happy marriage, happy wedding. Everything's going to go smoothly.
01:27:36
Speaker
And I hope that this really you know took a little stress out for 71 minutes of your your life It did. I could think of nothing else. of No wedding thoughts, no planning could possibly penetrate my brain as I was watching this movie. You were absolutely correct about that.
01:27:55
Speaker
So yeah, if y'all want to give me a nice little wedding present, how about you like, subscribe, follow, whatever, all of the that good stuff. That would be the best gift y'all could give me. Certainly better than Garrett's gift to me, which was making me watch this movie.
01:28:12
Speaker
And folks, I'm sorry that YouTube took us away. I don't know. It seems like we're still there. I don't even know if you can search us. if you' It seems like I've seen a couple people subscribe since then, but I'm not able to even see us.
01:28:23
Speaker
So I don't know. We'll still be on all the regular podcast places, but we might be a little too hard for YouTube. Hell yeah. We love you.
01:28:36
Speaker
Thank you for listening. Wet your snails. I don't know what to add for for this movie. Whatever. Just, hey Suck on an eyeball. Eat you alive. Yeah. that Now you're just entering like Donner Party territory.
01:28:51
Speaker
Donner Party erotic thriller. i would watch the absolute shit out of a Donner Party erotic thriller. Hell yes. Oh, man. It's the only way to keep from dying of exposure. Body heat works best if you're both naked.
01:29:10
Speaker
And I know the eyes are the best part. So it's like, I'm going to give you these. This is my, the way I show my love and my love language. Let's get the hell out of here. Want to shake you naked, need you alive. Happy Halloween. Happy wedding.
01:29:24
Speaker
We love you. so we'll see you next time.
01:29:33
Speaker
How's this the only movie I didn't bring up ghouls in? All right. Because it was too obvious.