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Sat Dharam Kaur – Compassion, Awakening and Soul Service
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What does it actually mean to heal — and can we heal completely?
In this episode of The Art of Authenticity, Laura sits down with Sat Dharam Kaur to explore trauma, identity, and the deeper mechanics of healing. Drawing from her personal history, naturopathic medicine, Kundalini Yoga, and Compassionate Inquiry, she offers a clear and grounded perspective on why suffering persists — and how it can unwind.
This conversation looks directly at identification, the mind’s role in pain, and what happens when awareness replaces narrative. Together, they examine purpose, healing without self-fixation, and why transformation doesn’t require perfection — only presence.
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Transcript
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey, you, you.
Introduction to Saad Dharam and Integrative Healing
00:00:26
Speaker
Welcome to this week's episode of The Art of Authenticity. am extremely excited. And was just saying before we started, I'm having a small fangirl moment, which is rare for me. But um today we have Saad Dharam joining us. Thank you for being here. I'm very grateful.
00:00:46
Speaker
Thank you so much, Laura, for inviting me. Um, Sataram is someone who has been integrating Kundalini yoga with naturopathic medicine, and it's very interested in environmental so sustainability.
00:01:00
Speaker
Um, we're going to talk about, ah your story and how you got here. Um, but I want to just say and I rarely do this. I'm very grateful. I've had the opportunity to work with you and that you've deeply changed my life.
00:01:16
Speaker
Um, and the way you've done that is just from your pure presence, just the energy that you show up in the room with, it's just quite healing. I got the chance to have some one-on-one sessions. So, um, I just want to share that with you and the audience and just my gratitude for this moment and, uh, and to express my,
00:01:39
Speaker
um my belief that just by showing up sometimes with the energy of being, it can help us connect to ourselves. So, so thank you for that.
00:01:50
Speaker
Oh, thanks so much, Laura. My pleasure. Well, I was sharing with you. I um i started this podcast.
Laura's Podcast Journey: Success and Authenticity
00:01:59
Speaker
years ago with this idea of how do we um find that intersection between what we feel is a successful life, perhaps achievement-based success, right? Like some people, that means I am an artist and I don't want I just want to show my artwork. And some people, it might be five homes in an airplane. I don't know. um But how do we find that in connection to what is authentically true, what we feel passion, what we feel connected to?
00:02:28
Speaker
And after about a decade of doing that, I found i got fatigued of that conversation. So I wanted to go a little deeper into this idea of authenticity. um What is the truth of who we are? Why are we here? um What is the essence of of self?
00:02:46
Speaker
um Things like that. But before we do, I just wanted to see if you would share a little bit about your story. um i've find it very interesting. um I know your work personally is based in a lot of trauma and helping people with trauma, um addiction, Kundalini is a tool that you used. And what I understand is that it comes from a um story from your own past with your mother. And maybe you could take the audience directly.
Saad's Family Background and Mission
00:03:19
Speaker
And through a bit of your story, how you came to this place of combining these very powerful methodologies into a holistic approach towards people, um where did this begin for you, this passion awaken in you?
00:03:32
Speaker
Sure. Thanks so much. ah So first, I ah want to say that ah none of us is separate from our history and our history of our parents and their parents and our ancestry.
00:03:51
Speaker
And that whether um we are conscious of it or not, there's there's healing required not only for ourselves, but for ah family history.
00:04:04
Speaker
And sometimes it's it's one one generation, one particular generation that will perhaps take on that healing. And that's what I feel like ah my role was in my family. My father was in the Second World War and um fighting for the British. he was Polish.
00:04:29
Speaker
And he had PTSD um when I was a child, although It wasn't named at that time, and i I don't know that it was never diagnosed in his lifetime, you know, but looking back at my own childhood and his outbursts of anger and his outbursts of violence, even though he was a great man, i can see that that's what was playing out.
00:04:52
Speaker
And my mother was very, very um sensitive, very smart, very intelligent, very cultured in a way. um but she was looking for something. She was looking really for spirituality and couldn't find it and didn't find it in um organized religion, didn't find it in Christianity, and but it was the hunger in her. She was really looking for spirituality. And because of a number of big traumas. We had a terrible car accident when I was four. She went through the windshield. Then soon after that, her sister had a very terrible car accident accident and two of her children were killed.
00:05:33
Speaker
And it was after that, that my mother started to use alcohol as a way to numb her pain and her trauma. Now it turned out that her father, my grandfather was also an alcoholic. My,
00:05:48
Speaker
my mother's two sisters became alcoholics. And so that was really a coping mechanism for or all of them. And so I saw that, I witnessed that. And i as a child, i i looking back, I recognized that I was very sensitive to my mother's pain.
00:06:07
Speaker
And she kind of leaned on me. I had two sisters, i was the youngest, but she sort of leaned on me to be the healer, I suppose, for her. And so I became her refuge in a kind of way, and which I didn't want.
00:06:27
Speaker
I didn't want, and I resented. Now looking back, I can see that that's what was going on for me. I didn't want it. I didn't want to be that for her. But i i grew up recognizing that she had a terrific amount of emotional and spiritual pain, and there was something in me that wanted to fix it.
00:06:48
Speaker
it was It was the love in me for my mother, really. And seeing her suffering, that that um that felt some sort of responsibility responsibility to fix it.
00:07:02
Speaker
I never could get her to stop drinking. She died of her alcoholism ah in her 60s. um But that drive to ease the suffering of somebody you love is is always in me.
00:07:20
Speaker
And so now I can look back and see that as a gift, and that that circumstance, that that upbringing created this, maybe I won't even use the word created, but um consolidated this um
00:07:41
Speaker
this sense of purpose, really, to help ease suffering. I sometimes think of my mother now and think ah that on a soul level, this is a really weird thing, on a soul level, does someone choose, right?
00:07:58
Speaker
Does someone actually choose that suffering so that some other person, as in myself, can can ah grow to help overcome suffering?
00:08:11
Speaker
you know yeah If we have lifetime after lifetime and one lifetime is just a little blink, then on a soul level, does someone choose these things to...
00:08:23
Speaker
and knowing that it's going to be a life of suffering, but that it's needed for something else to happen. I don't know the answer to that, but it's its it's interesting to contemplate that possibility.
00:08:33
Speaker
Yeah, because i'm I'm listening and I'm hearing these words, you know, um something within me knew that I didn't want it and I resented it, but i felt drawn to it, right? Such an interesting combination of experiences for you to have a desire towards and resent but know you have to on some level but not want to and so that question of what is that um within us that is called towards i don't know if that's the language you would use but um yeah and it's also i mean there's also the whole the karmic imprints so somehow the
00:09:19
Speaker
the I don't know, I'm a believer in karma, I'm a believer in in that we we don't come to this world as a blank slate, you know, there there are patterns that we come in with, and that whatever circumstances we have as a child ah are also circumstances to help us work through what we still have to work through.
00:09:46
Speaker
So, on on one level, I can say that that upbringing was what exactly what I needed to develop the capacities that i developed and to have the drive that I have and to have a sense of purpose that I do have. If I hadn't had that suffering around me, and if I hadn't had the violence of my father, also the kindness of my father, um I wouldn't be who I am, you know?
00:10:16
Speaker
So it's, it's really an interesting looking back, you know, to see to see how everything fits together, like a big jigsaw puzzle. And I love what you said about perhaps some souls do sign up for suffering in an yeah effort to break that cycle for one of us to perhaps step forward in, in an effort to heal. um so you've,
00:10:42
Speaker
From these experiences, you it's led you down this path of naturopathic medicine. Can you just quickly explain? I've worked with it, but some people don't know the difference between an MD and an ND.
00:10:53
Speaker
Can you give an explanation of that for those who are not exposed?
Understanding Naturopathic Medicine and its Contrasts
00:10:57
Speaker
Naturopathic medicine works with the body's own innate capacity to heal.
00:11:04
Speaker
And we strengthen that through removing what's in the way, So that might be certain lifestyle habits. um It might be certain foods that are toxic to the person. It might be certain stressors that need to be reduced.
00:11:22
Speaker
It might be environmental toxins that they're exposed to. So first we look at what's in the way, what could be an obstacle to cure an obstacle to healing and and help to educate the person on how to remove some of those.
00:11:36
Speaker
And then secondly, we look at how can we stimulate How can we enhance this life force energy, this healing capacity in each of us? And that can be done with diet, it can be done with herbal medicine, it can be done with acupuncture, it can be done with homeopathy, it can be done with nutritional supplements, it can be done with psychotherapy.
00:11:58
Speaker
And so those are the tools of most naturopathic doctors. We're trained in acupuncture, Chinese medicine, nutrition, vitamins, minerals, herbs, Western herbal medicine. I was also trained in Chinese herbal medicine and diet and homeopathy.
00:12:21
Speaker
So with it's beautiful palette, actually, and it's you can be very creative with it, with the individual and and and work with whatever they're most comfortable with.
00:12:34
Speaker
and you i i My father's a famous Western medicine guy, and i love Western medicine in certain moments. You know you break an arm, at they wrap it up nicely. But for all the other lifestyle things that happen, it is just a dream to work in the naturopathic world. It's really helped me so much. And certainly can't get past that the Western medicine schooling doesn't have one a nutrition class. I mean, they don't take one class, which is sort of shocking to think, you know, like ah you look at the car and all the parts and you don't look at what we put in the car. Just going to skip that little piece of the gasoline and wonder why if we put, you know, sugar in the car, it's not running. I mean, it's it's quite silly. Yeah.
00:13:28
Speaker
Okay. Thank you for that explanation. And um in addition to the naturopathic side, um you bring in kundalini yoga and you also work with this compassionate inquiry that you and i worked in as well. um Your story to, through your own experiences in your childhood that you shared.
00:13:52
Speaker
How did you move from there to finding Kundalini, finding compassion inquiry, finding the naturopathic medicine? um What was that process for you personally? Was it to help heal yourself and then bring it to others? Was it really um you had already known you wanted to heal others and it was just tools that you were acquiring that you felt worked? What what was that for you?
00:14:19
Speaker
um As a teenager, I was interested in psychology. i was also interested in the natural world. So I studied, I was quite fascinated with biology and um and I read a lot um about psychology. So that was that was that was of interest for me as a teenager.
00:14:44
Speaker
I was also and a writer. and an artist as a teenager. So these were my loves, was art, literature, and biology. and And I veered towards, um you know, I spent a lot of time in nature, and I like i would say I was a contemplative.
00:15:06
Speaker
Even as a child, I would sit under a tree for a long time or watch the water. You know, i was i was I was a contemplative as a child. When I was went to university, I initially started in biology, and then I i found it.
00:15:26
Speaker
What I recognize now is I found that there was no awe in the teaching of biology. and I was in the sciences, and I was i was um i became depressed because the met the mystery was not presented in the way it was taught. It was just so strange.
00:15:46
Speaker
and And quite depressed. And i recognize now that what I was appreciating was was the great mystery, and and I needed it for my soul.
00:15:58
Speaker
And it was being flattened in the way that science was being taught. What do you mean by great mystery and awe for you in that? i would I would look at them under a microscope at organisms, and I would just think they were the most beautiful things in the whole world.
00:16:13
Speaker
And how come how come everyone doesn't get this? Or I would study physics or biophysics or and see patterns and awe, really.
00:16:29
Speaker
And it was not stated at all. It was like dead. story was dead in the way it was taught. Like more facts than... Yeah, it was facts. and and i and And it wasn't working for me, you know? yeah Yeah.
00:16:45
Speaker
And so i then i i I decided to, I can't do this like this. I need to also work with the arts. And so I went back and forth between art school and university and art school and university, just just being an artist for a few months and then going back to the sciences until I had both degrees.
00:17:07
Speaker
And then when I finished um both degrees, it's like, how am I going to make a living? And ah then that's when the healing piece started because I knew I couldn't make a living as an artist. And so the next piece was, I thought, maybe art therapist, but then I ended up going into naturopathic medicine.
00:17:27
Speaker
yeah Yeah, beautiful. And how how did the Gabor Mate piece come in after that? Well, so I graduated in 1989 as an antropathic doctor.
00:17:39
Speaker
i graduated in nineteen eighty nine as an heropathic doctor And my interest was always in mind-body healing. I also taught stress management and sort of mind-body medicine at the naturopathic college for many years. And um then i I started practicing kundalini yoga when I was 19, as I was studying art and science.
00:18:11
Speaker
And I... ah I became interested in that because I was working in the library and started to read the yoga books. And then I met somebody that was practicing Kundalini yoga and we meditated together. And then I had a profound experience and I thought, well,
00:18:27
Speaker
this is, this is the only thing that's real, you know? Wait, we have to pause there. that That's a big statement. Would you mind sharing a little bit more? Like what is, ah what was the profound moment and, and what do you mean? It's the only thing that's real. That's. well I, I, we did a two and a half hour meditation and, um,
00:18:49
Speaker
towards the last maybe half hour of that two and a half hour meditation, my, i would say my identity collapsed, you know, but who what I thought I was, the ego identity collapsed and I became um light and unconditional love and absolute wisdom.
00:19:09
Speaker
and And there was a a total sort of merger with that, that, that shaped reshaped my understanding of reality.
00:19:23
Speaker
Wow. in that experience, I knew that what I thought was real wasn't real. And that the only thing that was real was this new experience.
Kundalini Yoga and Spiritual Awakening
00:19:40
Speaker
And what did you think was real that collapsed? Everything the mind makes up. and It's a lot. It's a lot. like Everything think the mind makes up isn't real. What does the mind make up? like what's the What's the line there of the mind to the the light and the love that you experience? There's connection.
00:20:03
Speaker
and There's no connection with the mind. There's just no mind in it. There's no mind in the experience of light and love.
00:20:14
Speaker
yes No. Yeah. I got a pause on that. That's good. That just gave me goosebumps. Yeah. There's no mind wasn't there. The mind wasn't there.
00:20:26
Speaker
and um And that's the experience of the totality. Yeah. When we move past it. Yeah. And yet we're always all in it. um we're isnt it We're in it all the time, but the mind is what separates us from it.
00:20:42
Speaker
Yeah. The attachment, the attachment to the mind. attachment to the delusion of what the mind is making up. It's not that it isn't real. I mean, i mean there's a table here, right? But in this other dimension, it's not real.
00:20:56
Speaker
Yeah. And so to slow down that moment for you, was it in um in a in a in a second? Was it over minutes? Do you even know? it was over about, ah probably about a half an hour.
00:21:12
Speaker
but But it changed my view. And in that moment, I also, um it was so profound that in that moment, I i made vow to myself that this is what I would serve.
00:21:32
Speaker
You would serve the knowing yeah that we are. yes Yeah. And what does it mean to you? This is, I love this. Sorry. We're just, we're going to get back to the story of Gabor in a second, but when you say you made a vow,
00:21:48
Speaker
um
00:21:51
Speaker
meaning this is the thing that's real and to be in service to that. Yeah. Yeah, because everything else is pale. Everything else is meaningless compared to that.
00:22:03
Speaker
Can I ask a few follow-up questions to that? Yeah, sure. And how does that, because there's many people who do psychedelics or have a moment or i've had a bunch. I mean, I, you know.
00:22:18
Speaker
And then that damn next day comes and the mind grabs you again. That vow you made, how did you wake up the next day and the week after that and the month after that and hold that knowing um as purely? Because I hear today you're speaking of it decades later with the same level of, right? It's coming through with that same level of like, it's like it happened yesterday hearing you share well that's what it was like you know to some degree it was beyond time and it's very very real for me and um and because of the experience i suppose i need a high level of meaning in my life to feel fulfilled
00:23:10
Speaker
And so um that's what I'm working towards. I mean, that's what I that's why that's what i work towards is is to, ah whether it's through teaching kundalini yoga or healing people or doing compassion inquiry, it's really bringing people towards that experience one way or another. you know And do you lose the connection to that vow?
00:23:34
Speaker
No, I don't. Wow. I mean, it's like a thread that I hold. Of course, you know, I go through days, but I've never let go of that thread. and I've never let go of that thread.
00:23:45
Speaker
So there's hours or days where the mind grabs you again. and For sure. But I would say that that's my guide. You know, it's not even like it's a conscious choice. It's that's what's guiding me.
00:23:56
Speaker
That's what's guiding me.
00:23:59
Speaker
Thank you for sharing um more of that. um So you you had this experience, you had this profound, I mean, what people might call a spiritual awakening, right, to put it simply. And and I interrupted your story, but if you wouldn't mind continuing from there, you were going to share about how it led to the compassionate inquiry. and Okay. so i So then I, you know, that that happened when I was 19. I finished naturopathic college when I was in my late-
00:24:34
Speaker
20s, maybe 27 or so. and um And then I was, i was ah well, that was my first introduction to Kundalini Yoga, that experience.
00:24:47
Speaker
So that you can see there's nothing that's going to take me away from Kundalini Yoga when that's your first introduction to it. yeah So Kundalini Yoga became my anchor and still is. And I've just deepened deep in my relationships.
00:25:01
Speaker
to it over time and find it more um satisfying and fulfilling. And ah I'm more impressed with it you know over time rather than less less than. It's more than. It just keeps growing.
00:25:18
Speaker
So ah when i finished naturopathic medicine, i was always i was already teaching a lot of kundalini yoga classes. And I had started to ah work with women with breast cancer using kundalini yoga.
00:25:36
Speaker
And then a few years later, around 2008, I started teaching a program working with people with addictions using kundalini yoga, combining it with a little bit of naturopathic medicine.
00:25:50
Speaker
And I started to read Gabor Mate's book in the realm of hungry ghosts 2009 and nine and And I was reading it as I was teaching this Beyond Addiction program. And so it just seemed like a beautiful match with what he was talking about and what ah I was teaching. And so then i emailed him, connected with him to see if he would teach with me so that I could have the benefit of his wisdom and his experience working with addictions and integrate that into the course.
00:26:24
Speaker
And eventually we, he said yes. And eventually we started working together in 2012, where he co-taught part of the Beyond Addiction program with me in Vancouver.
00:26:36
Speaker
Yeah. And then i could see what he was doing with people, working with them one-on-one during that program. And we did it again in 2015, 2016. And there four and he was there for for The program was over four weekends, one weekend a month for four months. And he was there every Saturday morning for those sessions. And um we videotaped them. And then I i became really um taken and curious and impressed with what I saw him do when he was working with people one-on-one.
00:27:14
Speaker
And why him? Like, what was it about, i mean, his methodology or him as a person or, i mean, what what was that connection for you?
00:27:26
Speaker
Well, it's like anything. Why anything, right? I mean, what what brings people together to do these things? That's that's the mystery, isn't it? That's the mystery. Yeah. Yeah. So it was it was a fit. That's all I can say is that I could see what he was doing and could kind of in my head structure it more than probably he could himself.
00:27:52
Speaker
Mm-hmm. And so there was this desire in me to learn it for myself and train my Beyond Addiction trainers, because I i had other people that were teaching Beyond Addiction, because this seemed to be a very quick, very compassionate, um profound way to work with people to create shifts in them and and i had done some counseling psychotherapy as part of naturopathic medicine and i'd never seen anything like this so i i it was just it was intuitive more than anything else is that i need to do this you know i need to structure this i need to um
00:28:37
Speaker
and And there was a recognition that ah by that time, Gabor was leading ah integration sessions for psychedelics too. my name was He was um going to Mexico and other places to do ah psychedelic retreats where the shamans would do the work and he would come in afterwards and um lead the integration sessions. And I knew he was doing that. And so it was interesting because I knew that if I was able to put this thing together, it would help.
00:29:07
Speaker
him and those people that were working with psychedelics, and it would help me and my trainers who were working with kundalini
Integrating Compassionate Inquiry and Emotional Healing
00:29:15
Speaker
yoga. So it was like a double helping thing. And because I'm a helper, right, because of my mother, it was, oh, this is what I'm going to do.
00:29:25
Speaker
And so I started to structure it. And what did you use? Because i'm assuming it wasn't this system. You mentioned when you were young, you were the helper for your mother and you were there. And at the same time, you now reflect back and know you resented it. And such a big piece of healing is to do our own work to recognize where those blocks are and get to our our true identity, which we can talk about the the love within. but
00:29:59
Speaker
So what did you use? i know kundalini, but was it was that the main way that you did it? It was mainly kundalini yoga because now I, after practicing kundalini yoga for about 10 years, I look back and i said, oh my gosh, I released a lot of anger that I didn't know I had, you know?
00:30:19
Speaker
But so the kundalini, because it's so physical and I i was able to process a lot of emotions. But then in in Kundalini Yoga and in many spiritual practices, there isn't a lot of room for the emotional work. So that's where Compassion Quarry came in. I also recognized that there was a need to to have another modality.
00:30:43
Speaker
modality that would help people work with the emotions. And that's where the compassion inquiry came in. The spiritual work is fantastic, but it does need to be coupled with emotional work to get underneath and look at what's there.
00:30:59
Speaker
Yeah. And what I love about compassion inquiry is that it interrupts at your, um I feel some traditional therapy, you go in and they want you to talk more about your story. and my belief is we are so deep in our story. We are so deep in repeating and repeating and repeating and repeating the same exact perspective over and over. And so to interrupt it, get into the the feelings underneath it, the emotions, um and then to release it perhaps with something physical. is that how you would describe that process to help people move past these, right? We have an identity structure of who we are in the world around us, and we don't see another way to see life. Yeah.
00:31:48
Speaker
There's two things. Well, there's three things that have to happen. First, you know from the perspective of Compassion Quarry, first we need to feel safe.
00:31:59
Speaker
in order to feel safe, we need someone that we feel safe with who can hold us emotionally and who we can kind of transfer, right? Have that transference of here's the good parent right there in that therapeutic space with that person.
00:32:17
Speaker
Otherwise we won't, ah we will still be defensive, right? We'll be defending ourselves. So that the first thing is to have a, in Compassion Choir, we call empathetic abiding presence, so another person that can um act as that empathetic witness and holder of space for us and really listen and be attuned.
00:32:40
Speaker
So that's the first thing, because not much will happen without that, because we can't, at least not initially, do it for ourselves. who We didn't get it. At least we didn't get enough of it. So we need somebody else to take that role So that would be the compassion inquiry practitioner once they're trained, you know. It's that stand-in for the parent that's compassionate and accepting and allowing and creates that open space or allows this open space. That's the first thing.
00:33:11
Speaker
And then the next thing is, as you say, the interruption, the interruption of the story. Now that interruption of the story is the compassion inquiry practitioner is looking for these unconscious beliefs that show up in the way the person expresses themselves and they're really telling and we then we have to interrupt and and bring those to awareness, you know, and question, question through inquiry, question that belief.
00:33:40
Speaker
Now that belief, and whether it's I'm not good enough or I'm unlovable or I'm not important or I don't matter or I'm defective or I'm wrong, it's my fault. All of these, you know, all of the above are what we project on the world unknowingly.
00:33:58
Speaker
And we project on other people. okay Make them the bad person, right? Because they're doing this to us. But no, it's that belief is inside of us. But that belief is what's reinforcing the suppressed emotion.
00:34:13
Speaker
That emotion could be sadness or rage or shame or fear or terror or something, disgust. So that emotion is what we didn't express as a young child because we weren't held.
00:34:28
Speaker
So there's there's three parts. We need the therapist to be the empathetic witness. We need someone to interrupt the story so that we can see these beliefs that we've been holding that are running the show that we're not aware of.
00:34:42
Speaker
That's the delusion the mind is creating. But then we also need to go to the body to release or to let unwind, maybe we can say, to make to allow the unwinding of these emotional signatures that have gotten lodged in the body because there was no possibility of of that being experienced, held, seen, understood, it allowed when we were child.
00:35:12
Speaker
So it's these three parts that need to happen almost not exactly simultaneously, but we allow them all in one CI session so that the shift can happen. Because if you just deal with the beliefs, you haven't done with you haven't dealt with the somatic piece.
00:35:28
Speaker
If you just deal with a somatic piece and you haven't changed the belief, the belief is going to come back again and reinforce that old somatic piece. So you've got kind of work all three of these areas at the same time.
00:35:40
Speaker
and then and And then eventually have the the client or the individual learn over time to be compassionate to whatever shows up. That's the other piece is the self-compassion. That's something that we learn.
00:35:54
Speaker
Yeah.
Possibilities of Quick and Profound Healing
00:35:55
Speaker
I'm not sure if that explained it well enough, but that's it. beautifully, and beautifully. and And I can't help kind of coming back to this conversation at the beginning of our our time where You were mentioning perhaps people sign up in a lifetime.
00:36:10
Speaker
I do the Akashic records and the belief is that we have a soul plan and we sign up for things and we come here and we're like little characters playing out a part. Yeah. When we go through these systems, um while I do believe a lot of it is in our childhoods and our stored physical bodies and in these narratives, we How do you fit in that other piece of perhaps it's a multi-life karmic thing, or maybe it's part of your soul plan or or however you might say it, the part about your you know somebody coming here to suffer to help somebody else.
00:36:47
Speaker
How do we cope with those pieces? um For myself, I found a huge part of my own journey has been moving towards trying to understand myself as perhaps a multi-lifetime energy.
00:37:05
Speaker
And so everything I'm trying to heal or understand, I i can't. um And the Akashic Record has showed me things that I'm like, Oh, well, that weirdly makes sense to me, even though as Laura, i don't have a felt memory. I don't, it didn't happen in this life is is how I could say it. So how do you, how do you think about that in the ecosystems um as people are working through um perhaps traumas that are not easing in the way that one might hope?
00:37:41
Speaker
Well, You know, it's a big question. I also believe that um we can heal 100% and we can heal quickly. with And we can drop all of these identifications with the right um interventions and the right opportunities to heal, which is why I do the work that I do.
00:38:08
Speaker
Of course. If i I didn't believe that healing was possible, and then i Why would I do what I do? But I think that combination of healing is through work like Compassion Quarry, through naturopathic medicine, so that we restore the well-being of the body to the best of our ability and restore our vitality to the best of our ability. It's hard to heal if you the vitality isn't there.
00:38:31
Speaker
you know yeah But also through the spiritual work, because a lot of what gets in the way, yeah ultimately, it's it's attachment and identification.
00:38:42
Speaker
It's identification, you see, is the biggest disease, really. yeah And identification, that's what, see, this experience I had, there was no mind, right? It's the mind identifying with this is who I think I am. This happened to me.
00:38:59
Speaker
This is what happened to me karmically. I have to work through this over and over again. That's still attachment. You know what I mean? Mm-hmm. So that's what has to clear, and that's the meditation process. That's the meditation process of of using, whether it's breath work or mantra or you know some sort of Vipassana-type meditation, is to is to lessen this hold of attachment and identification.
00:39:29
Speaker
And that's, I think, a missing piece in psychotherapy. Mm-hmm. Because we can beat ourselves up and go over and over and over the same wound because we think we need to be fixed. Well, there's nothing to fix, actually. Yeah.
00:39:45
Speaker
so so But that's that's where we have to get out of the mind. And so for me, that's where the yoga comes in. ah I love that you say this. People say to me, Laura, people don't change.
00:39:56
Speaker
I'm like, oh my God. It kills me because i don't want your essence to change. I want to move out of this identification of that as self into this other piece that you're expressing so beautifully. And and I think we can, um and we do. and um so You said you said they we can and we do and we can quickly. And so for all these listeners out here, I'm going to grab that sentence and come back around because I think this is, you're hitting on the parts that Dharam.
00:40:30
Speaker
think people do want to heal. they They put time and money and effort in, and sometimes they're still going back to the mind and rehearsing and rehearsing and thinking they need to fix one more thing so that they can have love, one more thing so they can have purpose, right? If they just do that last healing, then they will.
00:40:48
Speaker
um When you said quickly, you my my body sort of jumped. um What does that mean for you? Well, for me, it would be like a combination of something like Compassion Quarry or other therapies that may be similar, where there's inquiry, right? There has to be inquiry. There has to be a somatic piece.
00:41:14
Speaker
And there has to be this willingness to be interrupted, right? To be open, to be interrupted. So the story, we loosen our attachment to the story. So that has to be there, 100%.
00:41:26
Speaker
hundred percent Or you're just going to be telling the same story to a sympathetic ear for your life, right? Who cares? Because the ultimate is is the experience that we are unconditional love. you know that's That's our true identity. That's who we are.
00:41:44
Speaker
We are perfection. We are omniscience. we are this is That's a true identity. So that's where we need another practice, and it doesn't matter what it is, as long as it works for the individual, you know, that some meditation practice to still the mind, to empty the mind. So that we get we get through that attachment piece.
00:42:05
Speaker
we We don't attach to the mind, or the body for that matter. Mm-hmm.
00:42:14
Speaker
you're but like I think there's an idea out there that eventually you'll get to a place where the mind is just quiet and happy all the time. And that's not the goal, right? It's like the mind is always chirping away. It's just that I don't take it so seriously is how
Breathing Techniques for Stress Relief
00:42:27
Speaker
I think of it. Right. And it's not in the lead. Ideally, something else is in the lead, which is which is essence, that's that spiritual piece. that's That's the guide and the mind is coming along and helping out.
00:42:38
Speaker
Right. It's the tool to express the heart, the soul. Yeah. yeah um So for someone out there who's just getting started or has a bit of a practice, who's looking for um maybe just a couple, like ah a more practical thing, is there a breathing technique you would suggest or one quote or book that you're just like, oh my God, this is, I know we talked about compassion inquiry. I would definitely um recommend that to anybody. You have tons of practitioners on on your site. but is there something that you feel like, I could just get them to do this one thing
00:43:17
Speaker
one thing? it's really it's really it's a great place to start is with the breath. and um And one simple breathing technique, well, there's there's a few. one One could be just slow your breath down to four to six breaths per minute.
00:43:35
Speaker
And then you're turning on your parasympathetic nervous system You'll be much less stressed, and the mind will slow down. One piece. If not that, then another piece could be inhale through the left nostril, pause for a few seconds, and then exhale through the right nostril.
00:43:56
Speaker
And keep going. Inhale left, exhale right, inhale left, exhale right. But make a little pause between the inhale and the exhale. In that little pause, the mind is still. and just focus on that stillness in that little pause and then just increase the length of that little pause over time but that will in yeah inhaling through the left exhaling through the right will help to amplify your right hemisphere which is more felt sense in the present moment and turn down the volume of the story making of the left sphere inhale left exhale right so that's another practice
00:44:32
Speaker
And then in Kundalini Yoga, we often use mantra. you know and the the We have many several different mantras. The primary one is Sat Nam, Inil Sat, Exhale Nam.
00:44:45
Speaker
And I can't tell you how profound this mantra has become for me. um Well, I just told you. so ah It's so simple, but so profound. So if set means means the absolute truth beyond names and forms,
00:45:07
Speaker
So that experience that I have, you could call that sat. you know The translation of the word is truth, but it's not, hey, that's true and that's not true. It's like the absolute truth before there's any permutation, you know before there's any identification. It's a pure essence of being is sat.
00:45:31
Speaker
And nam means... um how we manifest our identity. So when you inhale sat, exhale, nom, if that's all you do, and but you really do it and you connect with that, that sounds sat as this formless um truth and you connect to it with the kind of reverence, then that little mantra can help to override your thinking and you can do it anywhere, anytime, you know,
00:46:00
Speaker
You can do it from the heart. and And that's just a beautiful little practice that anyone can do. Yeah. Thank you. Yeah. Thank you for sharing. So.
00:46:14
Speaker
so Switching gears just a little bit, i I mentioned to you just before we jumped on that the number one question we get over in my world is, what is my purpose? Why am I here?
00:46:30
Speaker
and Behind that question, i believe, is this little feeling within, this authentic self, this part that's calling out, that I have something to say. There's something, that truth within, right?
00:46:44
Speaker
um Past the mind. It's subtle. It's nuanced. It's often without language. It's just a ah ah knowing. and And I feel an energizing and uplifting towards something.
00:46:55
Speaker
And then the mind comes in and, oh you can't do that or that doesn't make sense. Yeah.
00:47:02
Speaker
But the people want to know, you know, what what is my purpose? Why am I here? um Why have I embodied if I'm a soul? Things like that. What do you believe is the purpose of of for yourself, for us collectively? do you have a view on that?
00:47:20
Speaker
That's a little question, Laura. I know. I'm known for my small question. Yeah.
00:47:28
Speaker
Well, my my perspective is that there is one ah one big consciousness of which we're all a part.
Harmony and Emotional Literacy for Holistic Development
00:47:43
Speaker
And that consciousness is seeking to know itself and to be itself. It's not just you or me. it's It's everything together is one consciousness seeking to be whole.
00:48:00
Speaker
And we learn through one another, right? we were We're becoming whole through the interactions. Nothing is random that happen to us.
00:48:11
Speaker
and The people we meet, the things, the accidents that happen, the things, the illnesses that happen, it's all part of this um evolving one consciousness so that um we become more conscious of that.
00:48:30
Speaker
So, and what does that mean? It means that together we become more loving, we become more accepting, ah we become more caring, we become more aware, we become more humble, we become more aware of the effects of our actions on all beings, not just people, but plants and animals and rocks and rivers and all beings.
00:49:00
Speaker
And we seek the most harmonious, and that the word for that would be dharma. you know We seek moving towards the most harmonious outcome for all.
00:49:13
Speaker
That would be dharma for the whole, not just for the one individual, but for the whole.
00:49:20
Speaker
And for people, Lok, thank you for sharing that. That's so beautiful. And for people... looking for how they play their part of this collective purpose, um finding that voice within.
00:49:35
Speaker
do you have suggestions on? Well, it's slow slow the breath down. Inhale, exhale, no. Yeah. Eventually, it's see, it's revealed, right? this This whole thing is revealed to us when when the mind is quiet.
00:49:49
Speaker
Yeah. And then action, right? It's not Dharam, like, because it reveals, but then the mind shuts it down again, and we don't trust to listen. Yeah. That's where the Kundalini Yoga comes in.
00:50:02
Speaker
ah Basically, we need a daily practice to keep to keep cleaning, right? but To do the house cleaning of yeah of cleaning clearing the mind.
00:50:13
Speaker
it's That old stuff is going to come back over and over and over again. So we need a daily practice to clean it out and until most most of it's cleaned out. so So that's what I would say. Otherwise, it's just going to keep piling up.
00:50:29
Speaker
Yeah. I keep thinking, oh, i'm I've gotten to my moment of, it's i'm like the moment I say, oh yeah, I'm good. I feel like I've really got this. It's like famous, you know, last words, right? It's like every day to have to come back to the breath, come back to the, that feeling within, I don't know how to describe it exactly. Right. But um I use this quote at the still point of the turning world. Yeah.
00:50:56
Speaker
There are the dances. Yeah. a white light still and moving from T.S. Eliot. you know That's the best way I can describe it. Yeah. Yeah, so whatever works to get to that still point and um anchor there and just wait for for things to be revealed and also trust the moment and trust we have to, as you said, trust what comes to us. it's Things will happen around us or happen to us that are part of what we're meant to embrace. And so we just have to keep embracing what is.
00:51:33
Speaker
Yeah. And this image when you were talking earlier about how parents... are the cause of so much struggle and to have somebody hold that empathic presence later. um was just thinking about you and people like you sitting around in classrooms around the world for little kids. You could just have ah another class all day of just presence for these kids to let out these energies. um It's unfortunate it's not part of our ecology or ecosystem as we're evolving through our childhood and teenage years to um have a space to experience someone in the present. It's coming. There are more programs in schools of kids being more emotionally literate and teachers are learning. So it's coming. It's a great thing that it's it's changing.
00:52:24
Speaker
I believe that too. Yeah, it's it's moving. Do you feel it's going in the right direction for kids today? ah so in some places it is. Certainly in in some places it it it is.
00:52:35
Speaker
Yeah. I find I have a 20-year-old and I find his world because they can look up everything. They have so much more vocabulary. and At the same time, at least in the States, there is this pressure on kids that is profound to um be busy all the time at the same time. So it seems like a bit of a conflict there.
00:52:58
Speaker
Yeah, there there is. It's more left left hemisphere, right? Yeah, yeah. So in your own story, are are you still, is there anything you're still healing? is there Are there things that you still find um arise?
00:53:16
Speaker
and Yeah, all the time.
00:53:20
Speaker
Yeah. Uh-huh. And why is that? it went i guess, let me ask it this way. um When you say that we can heal, you don't mean that there's nothing left to heal. You just mean perhaps the attachment to it is different.
00:53:37
Speaker
Can you explain? Because I think sometimes people think we're healed, meaning I have no more negative feelings. childhood traumas or dark areas within myself that arise.
00:53:48
Speaker
And then when it comes up again, it's, it's defeating, right? Like, I thought I was done with my childhood or something like that. Yeah. um Well, none of us is perfect, right? So we're always going to be imperfect. That's the thing.
00:54:06
Speaker
And the, um I think the, the key would be self-acceptance and self-compassion. So that's the other piece ah that we want to expand as we heal is our own self-acceptance and self-compassion.
00:54:25
Speaker
And as we do that, um our suffering goes down. That's all I can say. And and our our identification with whatever we think is wrong with us decreases.
00:54:40
Speaker
Mm-hmm. So when you think of what you're healing, you don't think in terms of there's something wrong with me? No. Or minimally. um Minimally. it doesn't It doesn't linger so much. No, I'm i'm very i'm very um grateful, you know, super grateful for where I am in my life right now, and I feel incredibly blessed.
00:55:07
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I appreciate you sharing it this way and very vulnerably and openly because I do think a lot of people project this concept of healed means I'm no longer um internally reflecting and finding areas of struggle or, you know, difficult days or difficult hours. I've somehow gotten to this place where I don't have um that experience. And I think it sets a bar. It's like physically, I'm just going to be in a place where i just never have to do sit-ups. My abs are perfect. You know, it's like we're emotionally, we're always, going to have harder days or difficult situations or perhaps things come back up from our past that we didn't that we thought we healed and there's another layer um and to not feel defeated or that you're you know still broken or something like that.
00:56:01
Speaker
yeah i mean Here's the other piece though, Laura, is when When there is, we don't we we don't need to be perfect, you know, but when we have a sense of what our sense of purpose is, what we're supposed to be doing in the world, and it's it's authentic, it really is us, and it's unique to us, then that's bigger than whatever limitations we have.
00:56:32
Speaker
And if we can serve that, Right? That's what I love. I love serving that more than i i feel my limitations. and So it's like you we have to nurture this this calling or purpose, whatever you want us so call it, ah and and keep moving towards that rather than over-focus on I still need to be fixed, you know? Yeah, yeah.
00:57:00
Speaker
And um one final question for you, that that feeling of purpose or calling, what does that feel like for you? Like people out there often seeking that experience and it's quite elusive to describe, i think.
00:57:19
Speaker
do you have a way of describing that feels like? Well, usually I'll get a intuitive kind of directive. get an intuitive directive.
00:57:33
Speaker
And sometimes it comes out of left field. I'm not, oh, that's interesting. Where'd that come from? and But it doesn't go away. and That's the thing. It'll come back and come back and come back. Yeah.
00:57:45
Speaker
It doesn't go away. And then there's this process of acceptance, whatever that is. you know It has to come back long enough that I can finally accept it.
00:57:56
Speaker
might accept it the first time. I might accept it the 10th time that it's kind of tapping on my shoulder. When I accept it then there's usually a feeling of something in my heart, excitement, joy, um even if it's big, right? Even if it's, oh, my gosh, really that?
00:58:18
Speaker
you know But there'll be some excitement and joy, and then my my inner motor starts to move. towards it and then I feel the sense of fulfillment.
00:58:30
Speaker
And this is what I find so fascinating. Something's tapping on you, right? So there's this feeling of an awareness around us that brings it forward. And then there's a sense of acceptance, meaning, right, some part of that mind that resists, is this really what I'm going to do? That's a lot hours. I don't know. don't know if I put that my schedule, whatever that might mean. And I'm not suggesting that's your exact story.
00:58:56
Speaker
And then that acceptance of, of i guess, bringing that intuitive calling that comes ah for me around me or something, i bring it within and it sort of all comes together. it's um But it does seem to start from people say like, I don't know, it just came to me or i was walking in the park and I just had an awareness or i don't know where that thought, it just ah it arose, right? And this is why I've gotten into the Akashic record because I'm like, i don't think all of it's happening in my mind. i don't think it's all even happening sometimes in my heart. I think it might be ah surrounding me as well.
00:59:36
Speaker
Yeah. When you say that tapping on the shoulders, is it because the experience is happening? Maybe not within the body. i well, you know, in, um,
00:59:50
Speaker
Indian philosophy, they call this chitta, right? Which is universal mind. okay And our our minds just maybe grab onto some of that chitta that's there.
01:00:04
Speaker
So some of that gets through and some of it doesn't get through and we attach to certain pieces and not. So I i think mind is kind of universal, right? It's not, it's not, it's everywhere.
01:00:15
Speaker
yeah And we attune to certain frequencies. and And this universal consciousness is working through all of this simultaneously, um attempting to make things happen if we pay attention and listen and follow through.
01:00:34
Speaker
And if we don't, then it'll go to somebody else. you know i mean, it's it's ah it's a living system that's always calibrating. That's how I view it. Like a big, big computer always recalibrating to see what can happen next.
01:00:51
Speaker
i love it. I could spend hours, as I'm sure the audience can tell, you're just a Endless, as you just said, a vast computer of information in so many directions. If anybody's out there looking to um experience any of your programs from Beyond Addiction to um the Kundalini to Gabor Mate, where's the best place to find you? And is there any program that you're running currently?
01:01:19
Speaker
Yeah, um my website is set.amkar.com. dot com And my programs are on that website, and then it takes you to other websites. So the Beyond Addiction program starts January the 6th online for 16 weeks. And then there's an in-person program in March in Spain and in May in Owen Sound, where I live.
01:01:48
Speaker
I have another program called Sutradhar, that starts on January the 10th, and that's a year-long program with four weekends using Kundalini Yoga and kind of some of what we're talking about, really, to to plug in and tune into your calling four weekends a year and then integration sessions in between and and inquiry once a week to explore.
01:02:15
Speaker
I will be offering a Kundalini Yoga teacher training in March, starting in March, 200-hour training you know in Sound in Canada, where I live. It's in Ontario, three hours north of Toronto. Compassion Quarry, we have many programs in Compassion Quarry. We have a professional training that starts three times a year. It's a year long, intensive.
01:02:38
Speaker
training we have support groups called CI circles that also start three times a year um so that those are some of the programs wild it' so amazing thank you for all you do thank you again from the bottom of my heart for how you've showed up in my own life and um thank you for coming on the show and sharing your your gifts and your voice you're welcome Laura nice to connect with you again thank you
01:03:11
Speaker
Hey, hey, hey, hey,