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Shampoo Is Better: Billy Madison vs. Happy Gilmore
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It’s the Season 1 finale so Rock & Rob knew they had to do something special. They have had some amazing matchups so far, but they all pale in comparison to this one. In fact, some people have said this podcast was created precisely for this purpose; and that’s to determine which of these Adam Sandler classics take home the gold jacket by winning the academic decathlon: Billy Madison (1995) or Happy Gilmore (1996). Listen in as Rock & Rob put these movies through seven rounds of questions such as better cast and which is more quotable; while discussing other important topics such as best 90s comedy villains; business ethics and unrealistic athletic talents in movies. You aint cool, unless you pee your pants or listen to this episode – I know from experience dude.
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Transcript
Introduction and Listener Reviews
00:00:00
Speaker
Ladies and gentlemen, can I please have your attention?
00:00:09
Speaker
Brothers don't shake hands. Brothers gotta hug. Your voice is like a combination of Fergie and Jesus. all like up from not die I don't want your life. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul. Okay, a simple wrong would have done just fine. What is going on everybody and welcome to The Movie Showdown with Rockin' Rob. My name is Rob Mansfield and with me R-O-C-K. The sea is silent. It's Alex Rockline. Rob, good to see you. How are we doing? Excited is an understatement for how I'm feeling right now about this episode. This has been a long time coming. Before we get into it, though, I did want to share a five star review and rating that we received. I love this new part of the show. Keep writing them in everybody. We will absolutely get to yours on the show at some point. So this is from Aussie Boss. The movie showdown is podcast magic. If you're looking for a good time, you've got to listen to the movie showdown. And if you try to disagree with me, then we're going to have to throw down. I'll shout it from the mountaintops. No, I won't keep it quiet, but don't just take my word for it. You're going to have to try it. They're fun and they are pleasant and their banter is always clever, which is why my vote is cast for best movie podcast ever.
00:01:22
Speaker
When that new episode drops, it's the opposite of tragic. So thanks to Rock and Rob for producing podcast magic. Wow. This dude is a wordsmith. That is impressive.
Season Finale and Summer Plans
00:01:31
Speaker
Some may say Taylor Swift. My vote is for Aussie Boss as the greatest lyricist of our generation. Five stars to Aussie Boss. Thank you. Like I said, five star review, write it in. We will absolutely get to it on the show. Before we jump into this episode, though, let's get to the rock question of the week. This is our season one finale before we take a little bit of a break for the summer. So, Rock, any fun summer plans? Gonna take some trips, I think. Gonna sit by the pool, get away from the summer heat. Love it. What about you?
00:02:03
Speaker
Yeah, we got some vacation planned. I have been working my way through all of the 90s kids classics with my boys. And that's been a lot of fun. Basically any of the movies that we drafted and laughed at weeks episode. Yep. But no, just relaxing and ah preparing to bring a great season two to our audience. I've heard some rumors about some possible matchups next season. I think there's going to be a lot of satisfied listeners. So this is our season finale. Alex, we did a whole season. Congrats to us. I can't believe it. I mean, I
Billy Madison vs. Happy Gilmore Showdown
00:02:35
Speaker
can believe it, but it just seems like a blur. One second, we're starting to know what we were doing, and now look at us. But, Rock, we have waited all season to do this. We knew the season finale needed something big, and it's finally time to break out this matchup. This week's showdown is between two of both of our favorite comedies of all time, Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore.
00:02:56
Speaker
If you've listened to this show, you know how much I love Adam Sandler and his movies. In fact, I would say Adam Sandler is the most influential actor of my personal life. I grew up during the time when he was the comedy king and between his movies, stand up comedy CDs and SNL sketches. So much of my personality and what I find funny is because of him. So we knew early on we were going to have to match up Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore, the two most known and most loved. Be correct. All right, Alex, why don't you talk to us about what movie you've got this week? I will be representing Billy Madison. Quick summary, a man child whose billionaire father paid his teachers to pass him convinces his father and apparently the school board to let him go back to school and spend two weeks in every grade to prevent his father from turning the company over to someone that in all honesty is very qualified to run said business.
00:03:45
Speaker
This movie was released February 10th, 1995. This movie was directed by Tamara Davis. You may know her from Half Baked with Dave Chappelle and Crossroads starring Britney Spears. ah Nice. Which i naturally sounds like a matchup we could do, Rob, at some point. So keep that in the back of your mind. yeah Apparently Tamara Davis was not the original director, Stephen Kessler was. After three days on set, he was fired. This movie was written by Tim Herlihy and Adam Sandler. Herlihy was actually Sandler's roommate at NYU before he became a lawyer. After he wrote Billy Madison with Adam Sandler. He was hired at SNL, short for Saturday Night Live, for those of you who might not be aware. And he eventually became the head writer. He's written many of Sandler's most popular movies, including Happy Gilmore, The Wedding Singer, The Waterboy, and Big Daddy. Billy Madison had a budget of $10 million. dollars Box Office brought in $26.4 million. Rotten Tomatoes has given us a 40%. And the Google audience score is 80. That's quite a discrepancy. Yes agreed. Which means this week I will be representing Happy Gilmore. A bad hockey player learns he has the best golf drive in the history of golf so he joins the professional golf tour to earn enough money to buy his grandma's house back because she didn't understand basic tax law.
00:05:04
Speaker
released almost a year later from Billy Madison on February 16, 1996. Directed by Dennis Dugan, he would continue to work with Sandler for many movies after this. Written by Tim Herlihy, Adam Sandler, and doing an uncredited rewrite was Judd Apatow. Adam Sandler wrote Happy Gilmore while filming Billy Madison and he actually asked Billy Madison director Tamara Davis to do Happy Gilmore but she passed. Happy Gilmore the character was actually inspired by Sandler's childhood friend who could always hit a golf ball further than Adam and Sandler believed that this was because he played hockey and so he kind of took some inspiration from his life and turned it into this guy.
00:05:45
Speaker
A budget of $12 million, dollars box office of $38.8 million, dollars but both Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore grew insanely popular on DVD. yeah If you track Sandler's box office from Billy Madison, then it goes up with Happy Gilmore, and then it just starts to skyrocket after that. Rotten Tomatoes gave Happy Gilmore a 62%, and Google Audience gives it an 86%.
Adam Sandler Film Insights
00:06:10
Speaker
So since this is Adam Sandler week, I thought it'd be fitting to do a quick draft Adam Sandler movies. I will have Happy Gilmore. Rock will have Billy Madison. You want to go first, Alex? Sure. Ready. Go. I'm actually going to go Mr. Deeds. And the reason I'm going to pick this one is because they filmed it in the town that Abby is from. And many of the scenes in the background are where we took our wedding pictures. I love it. Little personal connection. I am going to take the wedding singer. Well, I have a microphone and you don't. So you will listen to. every damn word I have to say. And with my second pick, The Waterboy, every time I watch The Waterboy, I always go into it thinking it's gonna be so dumb. And while it is really silly, I laugh so hard throughout the whole movie. It's very funny. Let's go. 50 first dates. This movie does not have a very high rating, but I don't have a soft spot for this one. I like 50 first dates. And then with my next pick, I will take Big Daddy. He popped, he popped anonymous?
00:07:08
Speaker
I am going to go with Just Go With It. I think that's a really underrated Sandler movie. yeah With my last pick, I'm going to take the Judd Apatow movie Funny People. This movie's grown on me a lot. The first time I saw it, I was like, yeah, but every time I watch it, I like it a little bit more. All right, and I'll finish it off with, I now pronounce you Chuck and Larry. That one's pretty ridiculous, but give me some Kevin James and Jessica Biel. All right, Alex, like are you ready for this? I think so. I think this is going to be our hardest task yet, but I think we're up to it. Round one, best cast.
00:07:42
Speaker
Well, as we all know, this is Adam Sandler Week, and Adam Sandler plays our title character, Billy Madison. Starring opposite him is Bridget Wilson. She plays Veronica Vaughn. Fun fact, Veronica Vaughn, the character, marks the first time in an Adam Sandler movie that the love interest has the initials V.V. But it would not be the last. We got some other ones here. We got Virginia Venet in Happy Gilmore, Vicki Valancourt in The Waterboy. Valerie Varan in Little Nicky, and Violet Valentine in Hubie Halloween. Also, there are a number of other alliterative female names in Adam Saylor movies. You have Lena Leonard in Punch, Drunk Love, Babe Bennett in Mr. Deeds, Janine Johnson in Reign Over Me, Daisy Danby in Funny People, Mary McGarrickle in That's My Boy, and Courtney Clark in Sandy Wexler. Wow. That's pretty cool. Yeah, like superhero names. They do sound like ah alter egos.
00:08:32
Speaker
All right, so speaking of Bridget Wilson, do you know the scene where Billy is eating lunch with the first graders and one kid says, Mortal Kombat on Psychogenesis is the best video game ever? Yeah. Billy interjects, Donkey Kong is the best game ever. And the kid responds, Donkey Kong sucks. And then he says, you know something, you suck. Possibly not intentional, but I think it might be kind of meta because Bridget Wilson would star as Sonya Blade in the Mortal Kombat movie later that year. You have to think that's kind of intentional, right? I always think that stuff's intentional. Marisa Tomei was actually offered the part. Marisa Tomei would have been interesting. For sure. Also appearing is Bradley Whitford. He plays Eric Gordon. He's the antagonist. He's the one that's trying to take over Madison hotels. So he actually never saw the finished film, but apparently people will yell to him all the time. Business ethics. I always find it funny when actors like, I've never seen the movie. What? You were in it. Eric's an interesting character because he is the antagonist. You're supposed to hate him. And Bradley Whitford does a great job of making you want to hate him. And while Eric, the character may have been a jerk to Billy, he didn't really do anything to show that he shouldn't be given the company other than just nepotism to Billy. No, he wasn't a bad dude. He was very cold and calculated and whatever about Billy. And then obviously once he was competing with Billy for the top spot, he was trying to, for lack of a better term, weasel his way in and set up some things that obviously were not good and then just goes off the rails at the end. But up to that point, I mean, we don't get any nefarious deeds of him in terms of how he would run the company. He's just like, why would we let this person who is not qualified at all take over a billion dollar corporation when he was Harvard educated, tons of experience, like he's not wrong.
00:10:13
Speaker
and Right, he's just a jerk to Billy and Adam Sandler so likable in that role that you automatically hate Eric He does play the role really well. So initially Adam Sandler wrote that part for Bob Odenkirk, which is interesting Yeah, I love Bob Odenkirk Philip Seymour Hoffman auditioned and was offered the role but he turned it down and then Sandler calls him up asked him why he declines and he just said I just don't want to And then he later admitted that he regretted doing so. Jeff Daniels also asked to play Eric, but at the same time, he was actually offered the role in Dumb and Dumber. New Line Cinema, the studio of Dumb and Dumber, only offered him $50,000 in hopes that Daniels would decline their movie and do Billy Madison instead. But he wanted to work with Jim Carrey, so he took the role despite the pay. Bradley Whitford was great. The way that he just throws the remote when he's angry and it hits his assistant off screen, it's such an unathletic and sunny looking throw. And then you hear that she's in a coma. It's such a throwaway part that you're just like, that was great. All right, also appearing is Darren McGavin. He is Brian Madison, so he plays Billy's father. So they own 650 hotels. They mentioned there's 61,000 employees. That's more than Hilton, Marriott, and the Radisson. So they were doing okay. Actually, initially, he was not happy about being in this movie and said he only did it for the money. But over time, he has come to appreciate the love he gets from it, claiming that Billy Madison and A Christmas Story are the movies he is most recognized for. I would think so. That makes sense. You have Charles Bronson and Leslie Nielsen as people who turned down this role. Dennis Hopper was offered the role of Eric or Brian, but he declined. A lot of declines. This is the most casting alternative things we've ever had. Norm Macdonald, he plays Frank, so one of Billy's friends who's just always hanging out. And rumor has it that he was actually drunk during some of his scenes. Very method of him. David Spade considered for this part. yeah norm could play it off
Iconic Scenes and Humor Analysis
00:11:57
Speaker
because he doesn't have to really say anything you just look at him and it's kind of funny yeah david spade you kind of want a little bit more see i think david spade could have been eric he's that kind of guy he could have been a good eric i think his age probably prevented him from that because he's yeah about the same out him. Larry Hankin, he plays Carl. So Harry Shearer and Edward Herman offered this role. Edward Herman, as we know from Gilmore Girls. He could not take the role because he was filming Richie Rich. Great film. yup Chevy Chase, Steve Martin, and Bill Murray were also offered the role. Some heavy hitters. Steve Buscemi, he plays Danny McGrath. He's the one that uses all the listed names of people he's going to kill. Those names were members of the crew. That's nice that they didn't just like... Imagine if you saw your name up there and been like, Uh, yeah. And then last but not least, Chris Farley. He is the bus driver. Chris Farley is great in this. As he is in everything, but during the scene where he's driving him to the field trip, like he makes himself yeah turn red, improvised, of course. And then before every scene he was in, he would c chug cups of espressos to maintain that energy.
00:12:56
Speaker
He is so good in this. Just like his facial hair. It's so good. He's one of those guys that he could do anything and make it funny. Well, so for Happy Gilmore, you have Adam Sandler as Happy Gilmore. This is apparently Adam Sandler's favorite role. I can see that. You have Christopher McDonald as Shooter McGavin. McDonald claims he originally turned down the role of Shooter several times because he was grown tired of being typecast as an antagonist. He reconsidered as he had enjoyed Sandler's previous film, Billy Madison, which I like to hear, especially at that time, it was easy to just knock on that movie. So I like him saying he likes it. Definitely. He says it was one of the best decisions of his career. He modeled shooter after golfer Greg Norman. Also, I believe the name shooter McGavin is an homage to Darren McGavin. Adam was writing Happy Gilmore while filming Billy Madison.
00:13:44
Speaker
I know your favorite joke in the whole movie is Shooter saying ah to multiple different people that they spend more time in the sand than David Hasselhoff. It's a great line. I love when he gets called out on it too. Yeah, it was funny the first time I heard it. So I think Shooter McGavin is one of the best 90s comedy movie villains. My top five would be, as an honorable mention, Harry and Marv from Home Alone. I think Marv was ahead of his time with branding, the wet bandits, great name. The reason there are only honorable mention on this list though is because they were trying to end a child's life, kind of a tough look. You can't crack the list if you're threatening a child. Number five, Ernie McCracken from Kingpin, hilariously sleazy and awful in the way only Bill Murray could pull off. Number four, Bill Lumberg from Office Space. We've all had bosses like this, very relatable. I'm gonna need you to go ahead and come in tomorrow. Number three, Dr. Evil from Austin Powers. Why make trillions when we can make billions? I love those movies. Number two, a man that we have talked about a lot on this podcast, Tony Perkis from Heavyweights. Attention campers, lunch has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
00:14:51
Speaker
deal with it. And at number one, Shooter McGavin from Happy Gilmore. For my money, the funniest villain on this list, and honestly, a bit misunderstood. It's not his fault he likes real estate speculation and put in his time to win the gold jacket, all to be upended by a guy who probably should have been in jail for assaulting multiple people. Sure, he may rhyme a little too much, but just remember, he eats pieces of shit like you for breakfast. That was great. So actually, Kevin Costner was offered the role of shooter, but turned it down. That would have been interesting. I mean, he's king of a sports movie. Yeah. He did a golf movie after this tin cup. It's tough to picture him as a villain. Definitely. I mean, it's Kevin Costner. It would have been interesting. We have Julie Bowen as Virginia Vennett. I think most people probably know her from Modern Family at this point. We Yeah, absolutely. have Carl Weathers as Chubbs Peterson. Apparently his first name is Derek. R.I.P. Carl Weathers. He is so good in this role. And actually, I think some pretty good acting. You watch the scenes where Happy drives the ball and it just zooms in on Carl Weathers face and he does just like little smile of recognition and appreciation. And it's just like a little thing, but it's really good acting. There's that scene where Happy asked Chubbs why he didn't play a real sport like football or something. Carl Weathers actually was a professional football player before becoming an actor. I don't think I knew that the first hole on the waterway open the it's all in the hips speech just iconic everything I know about golf I've learned from Chubs Peterson although he had the absolute worst prosthetic hand it was so bad made out of wood we have Alan covert back on the show he is Otto the caddy the two parts of him as the caddy that always stand out to me When he's taking the bath in the gross, dirty, golf water trap. And then when he, you think he's cleaning the ball in the ball cleaner and he pulls out his underwear. Then they pan around and there's. He's just naked. Once again, he'd be in jail. You know, as a kid, I didn't realize Alan covert. It's just so funny now. Like we've done a bunch of movies with him in it. This is funny to see him in this role. Chris Farley was initially offered the role of the caddy, but he couldn't accept because he was contractually obligated to film Black Sheep, and Steve Buscemi was also offered. Yeah, I think Black Sheep came out like two weeks before this. I wonder what Chris Farley would have brought to that part, because Covert doesn't say anything. We know Chris Farley is so funny, but his speaking roles are obviously funnier. Yeah, I feel like it would have been a different part. Definitely. Richard Kiel plays Mr. Larson. If you're wondering why it seems like Mr. Larson is leaning on something in most of his scenes, it's due to a severe automobile accident he had in 1992, where he suffered head trauma, losing his ability to balance without aid. Oh, okay. So he wears that T-shirt in part of the movie that says guns don't kill people, I kill people. This could be a meta reference to his character Jaws from the James Bond movie, Moonraker, where Bond says his name's Jaws, he kills people. It has to be. That shirt doesn't make any other sense. You could play as Jaws in GoldenEye, couldn't you? Yes. But he was so tall that if he did Slappers Only, he was impossible to kill. Because he was so high. He couldn't hit his knees, yeah. RIP Joe Flaherty as Donald the Heckler just recently passed away. Sandler originally wrote the role of Donald for Gilbert Godfrey, but he declined because he thought all people would remember from that scene is Happy's fight with Bob Barker. He regretted it later on. The director of Happy Gilmore, Dennis Dugan, actually plays Doug Thompson. He's the commissioner of the pro golf tour. That's cool.
00:18:06
Speaker
In a very small but iconic role, you have Ben Stiller as Hal L. Every line he has is a banger. Could I trouble you for a glass of warm milk? It helps put me to sleep. You could trouble me for a warm glass of shut the hell up. Now you will go to sleep, or I will put you to sleep. Check out the name tag. You're in my world now, Grandma. The way he just like enunciates the words yeah with his handlebar mustache. He had like this weird like sing-songy accent. I love when he keeps popping up in the background when Grandma's talking to Happy and he's like threatening her in different ways. ah That role was originally written for Rob Schneider. Very happy it ended up with Ben Stiller. Yeah, me too. There's a bunch of deleted orderly scenes. The one I want to mention, though, is so Happy is taking Grandma out of the nursing home to go get her house back. And he confronts Hal-El about what he's been doing. Hal-El says that his grandma's senile, and he's like, I'm glad we got ahead of this. And then it just like cuts and Happy throws him out of a second story window. And then all of the residents escape with the mista-mista lady leading the pack.
00:19:08
Speaker
I think sometimes they play that on the edited TV version. Okay. You have Bob Barker playing himself. Barker wasn't sure he wanted to be in the movie, but when he learned he was going to win the fight, he accepted. Originally, Happy was supposed to fight with Ed McMahon, but he declined. Do you know how old Bob Barker was when he filmed this? No. 73. Wow. He looked great. To me, in my lifetime, he never aged. He always looked the same. So I looked it up. I was like, I'm curious to see how old he was. If you said 84, I would have believed you. If you said 52, I would have believed you. We've got Vern Lundquist. He's the announcer. I love that his partner, Jack, never speaks. So in 2016, Lundquist said he still gets a monthly $34 check from the Screen Actors Guild for his appearance in the movie. Wow, nice. He has a really great line. He says, what a large and economically diverse crowd we have here.
00:19:56
Speaker
I loved him in this. I love commentators in sports movies. He's a legit. He's a real commentator. So the only true PGA golfers in the movie are Mark Lye. He's one of the guys that talks to happy at the cocktail party and Lee Trevino. He's the silent golfer who always shakes his head in disbelief and he has the line. Grizzly Adams did have a beard. I don't know how he just kept showing up everywhere, but I love it. It was a good running bit. And Joe Sackick of the NHL's Colorado Avalanche appears uncredited during the hockey tryout scene. Well, that's pretty legit. Hall of Famer. So what kind of connections you got for us? I'm going to give you two. So Larry Hankin, who plays Carl in Billy Madison, actually is in both Seinfeld and Friends. He was the downstairs neighbor. yep And then Seinfeld, when Jerry makes the show Jerry, he plays Kramer. And then Francis Bay, Happy's grandmother. she is in Seinfeld. She's the one that Jerry steals the marble rye from. but Two iconic actors, and they have some great roles in both of those shows. I mean, round one is so close. We're already starting with this, like, how are we gonna pick? To me, I lean Happy Gilmore because of Ben Stiller, Bob Barker, and Carl Weathers. I think that pushes it over the edge. Now, Chris Farley and Billy Madison and Steve Buscemi really give that a strong case too. And so it's almost like flip a coin. But for my money, I lean happy Gilmore here, but by the smallest of margins.
00:21:23
Speaker
I think if Chris Farley and Steve Buscemi had bigger roles, maybe would push Billy Madison over. But I think I'm going to agree with you with Happy Gilmore and then like you add in the cameos. Yeah, I think it just has a little more punch. Okay, so one to nothing Happy Gilmore heading into round two best moments. I don't even know how we're gonna do this category. Both movies start to finish just filled with amazing moments and hilarious line. We're not gonna be able to hit on all of them. So if we miss your favorite, let us know in the socials. We're gonna do our best, but we can't just recite both movies.
00:21:56
Speaker
Yeah. Let me just get the script and just read it to you right now. All right. So the opening for Billy Madison is ridiculous. It's silly, but really sets the tone and it sets the tone for the character and really his biggest downfall, which is that he just wants to drink all day and sit by the pool. Yeah. You know, what's today? Uh, October. Ridiculous. No, it's nudie magazine day. It gets in the golf cart, sees the penguin. Why? I don't know. No one knows such a weird thing to hallucinate. And then he says, I've got to send them back to the South Pole. They'll teach you real respectable. like I love
Cultural Impact of Sandler Films
00:22:26
Speaker
that line. One of my favorite lines, just the way the interaction between Eric and Carl, when Eric is like, I'm starving and Carl. I ate some Trisket crackers in the car. You should have had some. Well, maybe if you told me they were delicious Trisket crackers, I could have enjoyed them with you. I'm sorry. Well, sorry doesn't put the Trisket crackers in my stomach. Not does it, Carl? Just the way this is delicious. They keep saying Trisket crackers. so I don't know why, but it's just really funny. So then Billy's getting ready, but he's in the bathtub. I don't know about you, but I still think about this scene. Every time. Every time when I'm in the shower or whatever.
00:22:56
Speaker
Campoo is better. I go on first and clean the hair. Conditioner is better. I leave the hair silky and smooth, or really full. stop looking at me swan. that scene lives rent freee in my brain i think that was the first scene that i really remember just resonating and sticking with me yeah i always thought it was so funny it still it's so funny so then he goes down to the dinner you know his dad's kind of like reprimanding him ah like the guys are gonna miss their flights
00:23:27
Speaker
and knows this guy can stay in my room and then he bites his hand yeah so funny And then he gets asked to leave and he does the gibberish thing to Eric. Sabadoo! Yeah, but then he sees Carl and just completely changes back. Do you actually think he would act like that? Maybe, like, he just seemed like he didn't have a care in the world. He was probably still drunk. Yeah, yeah. He probably had to sit through so many of these. Alright, so then we get into the actual story of this. So he has to go back and complete every grade from 1 through 12 in order to inherit the company. So let's just go quick through some of the grades. So first grade is when he has Miss Lippy, who is an eccentric character.
00:24:05
Speaker
He reads, puppy who lost his way. I love when she's reading this like ridiculous little children's story and all the kids like fall asleep, even though it's the first thing they did. Like they just got to school. Yeah. And she's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, miss lippy. That's something that I used to quote all the time. I love the cut. So it's like, you know, they're all sitting there and then it kind of does like a quick cut to them. He's sitting in the same spot on the kids are asleep, but his face, he's like leaning in. Yeah. He's like really engaged. So the puppy who lost his way, actually the puppy's name is happy. Oh, interesting. There's a connection. Okay, then I think probably my favorite scene from first grade, maybe the most recognizable, is the dodgeball game. So good. So he goes outside, he immediately gets out, he goes back in, and miss the piece of metal. This is my time. Like, you get back in the game when they see you. Once again, it's her time, a half hour into school. It's right. So then, kid throws the ball at him, and he catches it one hand, just looks at it. Now you're all in big, big trouble. When you watch it, you're like, man, like he's really helping those kids. So he's actually hitting them as hard as he could. And they had a cut, like the editor has a cut because the kids are crying. They're getting hit by it. One kid gets hit in the face and his head goes, snaps back. I mean, this part is so random and so weird. So this is when he sees Veronica in the hallway. He sees the milk that's going to go to the classroom. And then he has her. She wants some milk.
00:25:19
Speaker
<unk> So dumb. That could be our milk. And then she goes, no milk will ever be our milk. Then um the janitor is following him around. What about you, Sideburns? So good. Second grade, we don't really see much from second grade, just a spelling bee, which is great because the words are so ridiculously easy. that He gets so mad when she gets the word bath. Why don't you just give her the trophy? So good. And then he gets couch for the win, which he has trouble spelling at first. Are you going to the mall later? No, I am not going to the mall later. I love when he gets it right. I am the smartest man alive!
00:25:52
Speaker
I'm glad he won. Third grade is is most of our time in the movie. So Ms. Vaughn is his teacher. He becomes buds with Ernie. It's the best part, I think, of Billy Madison is is the third grade scenes. The kid's reading and he makes fun of him for stuttering. I mean, it's pretty mean. It's terrible. You know, Ms. Vaughn comes over grabs me by the ear and pulls him out in the hallway. I see your lips moving, but I can't make out the words. I'm deaf. Oh, Marana, come on. Oh, hot. Want to touch the hiney.
00:26:21
Speaker
Classic. Just another line that was quoted nonstop growing up. Once again, still quoted to this day. Valentine's Day. Great scene. Billy's getting all the cards from the little girls who have crushes and then he gets one from Principal Anderson. So funny. So then he has Ernie call her and see if she has a crush on anyone in the class. How did he have her number memorized? That, I don't know. I mean, that that happens a lot in TV and movies. Well, they'll just know a number. Yeah. The whole field trip scene start to finish from the bus ride to the end. It's top notch. We've talked about Chris Farley as a bus driver, and then they realize all the lunches have been stolen and Chris Farley and Billy's two friends are just sitting there and they're just laughing, eating all the lunches, which is great. I'll tell you who took those lunches, that damn Sasquatch. The tour guide is great. She's got some great lines. She's got one of the more quotable lines too. After Ernie pees his pants and Billy comes to his aid and peeing your pants is cool. It's the coolest. And then she goes, if peeing your pants is cool, consider me Miles Davis. And then that is the gross state I've ever heard. And then all the kids are getting on the bus and then Ms. Vaughn gets on the bus and Chris Farley holds back Billy and then, you know, takes a quick peek. Again, very problematic. I absolutely love the scene and these lines.
00:27:31
Speaker
That, Veronica Vaughn, is one piece of ace. I know from experience, dude. You know what I mean? No, you don't. Well, not me personally, but a guy I know. Him and her got it on. Whoo-ee! No, they didn't. No, no, no, they didn't. But you can imagine what it'd be like if they did, right? Just banger after banger. It's like every five minutes is an iconic line. So, you know, he starts high school. He pulls up in his 79 Pontiac Firebird Trans Am. It's a cool car. I mean, you get some great, great lines and he's in chemistry class chlorophyll, more like borophyll, but then no one laughs. I mean, how do you not laugh if someone were to say that? That's a great line. It's so funny. So then, you know, the girl next to him kind of gives him a look. So then he decides to humiliate her. And then he's like, what? No, I will not make out with you.
00:28:26
Speaker
So he gets bullied in high school. He wants to go back to third grade. So he goes back and visits the same with the chubby kid. I don't know if he's ever given the name in the movie, but gee, I can't wait to go to high school. Don't you say that. Don't you ever say that. Stay here as long as you can for the love of God. Cherish it. When he shakes his face, you can hear his like, it's. but the It is so good. This is now bringing us kind of to the yeah the real climax of the of the movie, which is the academic decathlon. So leading up to it, we have the studying scenes. Veronica is trying to help him study. He answers a question right. She takes off her jacket and keeps going, and then he gets one wrong, and then she starts putting a clothes back on, whatever. They have a similar scene where Chris Farley is doing the same thing, and he gets it the answer right and takes off his shirt. I just love what Chris Farley says, though. He's like, that is correct.
00:29:21
Speaker
And then he like puts the finger over the mouth. like All right. So this brings us to the actual academic decathlon. So we see most of the events, not all of them, but so we have a math event, which Eric wins some formula where the answer
Sandler's Comedic Formula
00:29:34
Speaker
is one 11th. Billy Madison's answer is Eric drinks his own pee, which he writes on the chalkboard. ah We get to home act Billy wins that by baking a pie and Eric is on fire if his ad is a race I don't know how long but it's a sprint Eric wins mentions He was a second team all-american at Harvard for track good for him brings us to science Billy wins, although he does cheat music Eric wins in a landslide theater. We think Eric's gonna win He does a pretty good job was doing Hamlet and then Billy Madison comes in all dressed up and gives a very rousing down It's very, very inspiring. So they only show six, but they say Billy is leading five to four. And then we go to the final stage, big board, 20 categories with possible questions. Are you ready for them? I will list them for you right now. Yeah, let's do it. Okay. We have English literature, US s presidents, my wife, the tramp, astronomy, baking, burning dog poo in the human response.
00:30:27
Speaker
Reflections of society and literature, information systems, chemistry, the Roman Empire, my spouse is sleeping around, the French Revolution, automotive repair, 20th century poetry, calculus, needlepoint, architecture, business ethics, Shakespeare, and I married common street trash. Do you have a favorite? The difference between going of like real ones and fake ones. I think burning dog poo and the human response is my favorite, especially with his reaction where he's like, pick it, pick it, pick it. I just kind of wish I could hear what the question would have been for I Married Common Street. Yeah, me too. Me too. Yeah, so Billy gets Industrial Revolution and then he uses the book from first grade. He uses the puppy who lost his way as an example, except the puppy was a dog, but the industry, my friends, that was a revolution.
00:31:12
Speaker
He said it so confidently, too. He said it so confidently. And then we have the judge's response, which it might be one of the more more famous lines from the movie. I mean, it's part of our opening. Mr. Madison, what you've just said is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever heard. At no point in your rambling, incoherent response were you even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. I award you no points and may God have mercy on your soul. Okay, a simple wrong would have done just fine.
00:31:45
Speaker
The whole thing is just great. Very well written. I feel like I say, okay, a simple wrong would have done you a spine at least once a month. Right. Or everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. So actually the judge of the competition is a principal. He is actually an SNL writer and producer. His name is Jim Downey. That part where he says everyone in this room is now dumber for having listened to it. It was actually taken from something he would say to Chris Farley whenever he would pitch sketches in the writers meetings at SNL. How demoralizing. Just pretty great. Hey, if anyone can handle it, it's Chris Farley. Alright, so my favorite moments from Happy Gilmore. I love the opening scene with the old footage. I think this also sets up his character really well. He's belting the kid on the head with the plastic hammer. He's putting the things between his legs and whatever. yeah I just love Happy's got two junior hockey league records most time spent in the penalty box and he was the only guy to ever take off his skate and try to stab someone. Good records to have. He shoots Mr. Larson in the head with the nail gun. They show him laying in the hospital bed like clearly destroyed. He's like, he got a couple lucky punches, but I still feel I won the fight. I love the hockey tryout scene that turns right into the breakup. He misses the goal, not even close. Not even close. Is that goal regulation size or what? Then his girlfriend leaves him, he's singing and talking to her through the intercom. You know what? You're a lousy kindergarten teacher. I've seen no finger paintings you bring home and they suck! I'm sorry, baby. I didn't mean that. Then he's licking the intercom. The kid's just out there staring, cuts to the lady, and he's like, eh, whatever. You don't want breakfast? that brings grandma to their nursing home scene. You got the Mr. Mr. Lady jumping on the windshield. He tries to give Hal L. Ben Stiller's character $1. He's like, take real good care. Then he goes back to the house. The guys are golfing, but it looks like they're using the clubs that Happy ends up using. his grandfather's clubs. So I don't know how happy got them back, but that's where we got the intro to the happy Gilmore swing, which one of the most iconic sports movie things ever. Have you ever been to a driving range and not seen someone do this? No, we were talking earlier and you were even saying a lot of places have warnings. Like you're not allowed to do this. Yeah. at Top golf. You can't. It doesn't say don't do the happy Gilmore says, do not do a running start. And the little picture of the guy has a Broons jersey on. So it's the happy Gilmore. Everyone knows.
00:33:59
Speaker
So he hits the ball amazingly straight for a guy that's never played golf before, and he hits the guy standing at the house, and the movers are like, you hit that guy. He's like, he shouldn't have been standing there. He's like, what, on his front porch? involved yeah So then it cuts to the driving rain scene, and he's like, come see the amazing golf ball wacker guy, which then cuts to him hopping in the batting cage, another iconic scene. He's taking the batting cage fastballs off the chest. Oh, God, I heard a little bit. I'm all right. Oh, God, son, what the hell are you doing? 364 more days till next year's hockey triumph. I got to toughen up. Yeah!
00:34:34
Speaker
That's when he meets Chubbs. He accidentally hockey sticks Chubbs hand off. Chubbs like, ah, don't worry about that. Made of real wood, real sturdy. And then the truck runs it over. And Abby's like, ah, nice meeting you. And gives him like the fake handshake. Then we go into the water very open. His first time putting where you just like, I don't know how anybody could possibly be that bad at putting, but he was so bad. Finally gets it in and he just screams like, yeah. And then the fans are like, oh my gosh, like, you know, they're talking trash about him and then he punches the fan out. Yeah. Another time he's probably going to jail. yep So he wins waterbury open to qualify for the professional golfing tour. Chubs tells him he's gets lucky and happy. He's like, well, some may call it luck. I call it. Well, luck.
00:35:14
Speaker
So you go to the Portland Open playing with Gary Potter. Not to be mistaken with the boy wizard Harry Potter. Oh, yeah. I love in that sequence with just the astonishment of Gilmore cursing on the TV. The beeps are so strategically placed. They are. They're very good. Peace of monkey. Shooter fires his caddy mid-match, but then the caddy just stayed till the end of the tournament. the Happy riding the bull and Chubs is watching. He's like, happy you're riding the bull? He's like, yes. He's like responding to him from the TV. I love when you see his grandmother doing it in the nursing home. So good. That's the sequence when he's talking to the golf ball. He's like, why why didn't you just go home? That's your home. Are you too good for your home? Answer me.
00:35:55
Speaker
The first shooter confrontation, happy breaks the bottle. And then Virginia shows up and he's like, oh, I was just looking for the other half of this bottle. That's when shooter rhymes, just stay out of my way or you'll pay, listen to what I say. And have like how about I just go eat some hay. I can make things out of clay, lay by the bay. I just may, what do you say? And we'll go to the pro-am, the Bob Barker scene. You've got the you suck guy, RIP. All he wanted was some red flops or some sizzler. I think at that point in Happy's career, you would have just had that guy removed, right? Yeah, he probably would have been. Like, they have the signs like, quiet, please. Like, there's no way he'd still be around. So the fight with Bob Barker is great. Happy just like, Price is wrong, bitch. Now you're going to get it, Bobby. I love the one camera angle where it's just over Bob Barker's shoulder. Just like repeatedly. He realizes he needs to learn how to play real golf. So he goes back to Chubbs. His apology is hilarious. I'm stupid. You're smart. I was wrong. You were right. You're the best. I'm the worst. You're very good looking. I'm not attractive. The mini golf scene that looks like such a fun mini golf course on that first hole, those penguins looked awfully familiar. looked similar to that penguin he was chasing in Billy Madison. Absolutely. And then the evil clown laugh. That's actually Adam Sandler's voice. Oh, that's great. That's the first time we see the happy play scene. Kind of ahead of its time, you know, mental visualization. I'd say so. Day one of the tour is great. Walks past shooter McGavin. Congratulations, murderer. Yeah. This is after Chubbs passes away because he falls out of the window. Right. Happy's playing really well and his trash talk to shooters the best. He's like, the pathetic thing is you've been playing golf your whole life. That's a great line. Then he makes a really difficult putt and he just looks, at he's like, happy learning the putt. I love that one shot that goes way past the hole, but then comes back like a reverse U shape. You could kind of see the outline of the path. So I don't know if they use like a magnet or something for it. Funny scene. Cause then he's like, I didn't see it. Did that go in? I missed it. Did it go in? Then, you know, he gets hit by the car, not playing well. He's in the woods, does another happy play scene. The third one where he sees Chubbs, he kind of gets his mojo back from that point to the end of the movie. It's really great. shooter shot, he sinks that putt, he's like, choke on that baby. I need to use that more in my life. He's such a good character. But then Happy's last shot, the ah TV tower falls in front of the hole. He's got to play it as it lies. It's kind of set up similar to one of the mini golf holes that he made. So he does the shot, the crowd just looking left, right, left, right, following the ball everywhere it goes, rolls right in. It's a great sports moment. It really is. Yeah. Leading up to that, one of my, it's such a dumb line, but it's by
Final Rankings and Season Recap
00:38:30
Speaker
Vern Lundquist when he says like, I knew happy Gilmore was tough, but I can't believe he's going to keep playing after being hit by that car. Like when would you ever hear that in a golf tournament? Yes. There's two shooter parts that I just absolutely love. One is when he's in the woods practicing the happy Gilmore and can't do it. I thought it was just really funny. But then the other one where the, there's beach balls being hit around and then one gets on the green and he hits it with his golf club and he can't get it off. Damn you people, go back to your shanties. These are so funny. I mean, both these movies have iconic scenes. I would say there are more moments from Billy Madison that I consider iconic than Happy Gilmore. Happy Gilmore has some really good scenes. The last scene is really good, but if we're looking at just iconic moments, I'd say Billy Madison narrowly edges it out by just kind of the quotability, just in a volume standpoint.
00:39:16
Speaker
Yeah, I think so too. But again, it's so tight. There's so many insanely classic scenes from both of these movies. I think if we made a top five list of iconic quotes from both of these movies, I think Billy Madison would edge it out three to two. I think I'd agree with that. All right, Billy Madison takes round two. We are tied heading into round three. Better title or soundtrack.
00:39:38
Speaker
The titles are pretty straightforward in both instances, just the character's names. Nothing unique there. Happy Madison is Adam Sandler's production company. Yeah, I like that he combined both movie titles. Signifies how important they were to him. Really, he wouldn't be where he is without those two movies. Billy Madison, again, theme and the score really good. You hear it and you know exactly what movie it's from. Right. du du and and and and done So after he convinces his dad to send him back to school, so it's right after he learns the sea is silent in rock. So he's dancing on the stairs and that is I'll tumble for you by the Culture Club. I showed Wes this scene and now Wes is obsessed with that song. Nice. Jackson 5, ABC. That's the montage of him moving through the grades. There is not a more perfect song for that montage. It's a great scene. I just love when Eric, he's like drawing on him, poking the eyes out. You got Renegade by Styx. Love that song. I mean, then you got the Billy Madison Way from his party. It's a pretty musical movie, like more so than you would think. I sing that song all the time. Billy passed the third grade. Oh, what a glorious day.
00:40:42
Speaker
We didn't mention the grad parties. That song is played at a grad party. Those scenes are wild. The one part that really sticks out to me is when they're riding the jet skis in the pool. I was very concerned. I'm like, man, the guy's going to hit the wall. Oh, no, he didn't. He's very, very controlled of that. Then you have the musical scene after Veronica beats Billy up. Yeah. That is very random, very out of place. What are your feelings about that scene? I don't love it. I've never loved it. It doesn't fit. I feel like they were trying to show an epiphany yeah through a musical number. I didn't need it. I could do without it. For Happy Gilmore, not much makes me happier than hearing Tuesday's Gone in the opening. It sets the movie off on such a good tone. Then you've got Kiss You All Over by Exile when he's singing through the the intercom. I wanna kiss you all over and over and again
00:41:32
Speaker
da da The actual words are till the night closes in. I always thought it was till the night glows easy because he the way they say it's like
00:41:44
Speaker
legitimately probably until like a year ago, I thought that. That's a tricky one. You've got Carry On, Wayward Son by Kansas, Wooly Bully, Endless Love, that's in the ice skating date scene. What, friends listen to Endless Love in the Dark? I know the guy lip syncing is so funny. He's so funny. It took me till like pretty recently to realize the guy was lip syncing. I feel like growing up, I was always like, wait, is this guy just singing into the microphone? He does both parts, it's so good. I like that part because he's like, talk about your all time back fires. You've got jump around, which I love that song and then making its fourth appearance on the movie showdown. Rock and roll part two. What is up with this? A lot of movies use that song. We do not endorse. We're not even going to say his name. Terrible person. But the song is in the movie. And this is the fourth episode that it's been featured in. The titles wipe each other out. They're basically the same.
00:42:34
Speaker
So then it comes down to the music. I would say Happy Gilmore has a few more better songs. Also the fact that it's a sports movie allows for a little bit more of like upbeat montages. ye But I don't want to discount the fact that the Jackson 5 ABC, that is like almost a perfect use of a song and a montage. Yeah, if anything, I would just take points away for the random song. Yeah. Tuesday's gone. Right when you hear that, you're like, yeah, Happy Gilmore is coming on the TV. You just know it immediately. Okay. Happy Gilmore takes a two to one lead heading into round four. Plot holes, cringiness, random questions.
00:43:12
Speaker
So the plot holes for Billy Madison. So there's some calendar math issues. okay So to complete every grade in two weeks would take 168 days, 14 times 12. The June 15th deadline that Billy is given is the 166th day of the year. Meaning Billy would have needed to start school on or before December 30th. Now most schools would have been closed for Christmas break. So I'm guessing he started school right before Christmas and then he had a break and they just never really showed it. I don't know, whatever. Also Billy was in third grade on Valentine's Day, the 45th day of the year. That would be the middle of the seventh week of school when he should have been in fourth grade. So just a little calendar math, doesn't matter.
00:43:52
Speaker
Obviously the entire premise of Billy Madison is insane, but let's just agree for this that it's not. But could you actually learn enough in two weeks to be considered graduating from a grade? I mean, maybe like first grade, but yeah, especially in high school. I mean, I guess technically he only spent one year in high school before he stopped going. Yeah. And then they did decathlon. But I mean, even like seventh, eighth grade, if you're dumb enough to not know that the sea is silent and rock. Yeah. I think you're going to struggle with just basic middle school stuff. Well, then the timing would have to work out that you are starting when they're starting a unit or something because like in high school, like he's in chemistry. It's like I took chemistry in high school if I was dropped in randomly. I mean, I didn't do that great in it to begin with, but.
00:44:35
Speaker
Any type of high school math and any type of high school science, it all builds off each other. Exactly. If you're not there in the beginning, you're not going to be able to pick up on it. Also, nothing against graduating high school. That's great. But to run a multi-billion dollar company, you're just going to accept only a high school diploma. Like you don't want to go to business school and get an MBA. I'm going to go to Harvard and be second in all American. Anyway. Anyway. I did think it was kind of wild how fast Veronica changed her opinion of Billy. She like hated him. And then he did the fake peeing your pants thing for Ernie. And then literally at his graduation, she turned on to him so fast. She was like, show me your room. And then yeah Buffalo live or stuffed, preferably stuffed for safety. That's when Carl walks in. Carl, good to see you. Yes.
00:45:19
Speaker
Honestly, nothing really stood out to me as cringy. One in instance of the R word. Oh, really? The mucus queen's son. Interesting, I missed that. Random questions. Would a school actually allow this to happen? I could see like an elementary school maybe, but like high school. You think that an elementary school would allow a 25 year old to just come and hang out? Yeah, feel screened. Sure. So you wouldn't feel weird if a 25 year old man was sitting next to Evelyn. feel weird. Yeah, definitely. You and Abby wouldn't like raise some complaints. what Would we have to invite him to the birthday parties? hey Yeah. Why did Billy and his friends always have shoes on and regular clothes in the pool or laying by the pool? I mean, I don't care how drunk you are. You still put a bathing suit on. Yeah, that made me uncomfortable.
00:46:02
Speaker
Why are his friends eating with the bus driver? Great question. Like how do they even know each other? Where'd they come from? How'd they get there? I got a few questions about the O'Doyles. How did he get manure in his locker? What a feat. And then the whole family just drives off a cliff because they hit a banana and like randomly turn. Like that was a pretty dark part of the movie. I know. While they're chanting the whole way. Why would Eric agree to do this? I don't know. Especially if he had already signed papers. Like he didn't need to do this. You had it, man. Eric's business ethics question. So Eric was a Harvard grad who had worked in business for a long time. He couldn't have BS'd an answer. He's just snapped. He couldn't do it anymore. So Eric pulls a gun, which is super random. I guess that's pretty cringy, like a gun in school. But if you're wondering why Eric's at the graduation speech and not in jail, I read somewhere that apparently they cut a scene where they were going to insinuate that Billy didn't know he would have had the press charges. But if you pull a gun in school, you don't need the press charges. The police are there. No, yeah. You're just going to jail. Right.
00:46:54
Speaker
Alright, what do you got for Happy Gilmore? It was is a small one, but so his dad dies in the beginning from the camera getting hit with a hockey puck, but then his mom didn't want anything to do with him, so she moved to Egypt. It's very random that the dad died from the hockey puck hitting the camera. I'm not saying that there aren't moms out there that wouldn't just like abandon like this, but it was very interesting that they were just like, his mom just left because she didn't like hockey. Right. Well, you have a son, so you didn't like hockey and your kid. Yeah, I think it was more the kid. Yeah. Yeah. So we can't really nitpick the pro golf structure here because it's the pro golfing tour, not the PGA that we know. But one night of mini golf, I don't think makes you a professional putter. Uh, I can assure you it doesn't. All right. So after happy gets hit by the car, he has a bunch of really bad holes. And then we see him shooting a six and a seven on some of them. And then they show the scoreboard and the scoreboard is like essentially the same. Yeah. I mean, I think at that point, like he's probably done. Especially with someone like Shooter, after ah two or three holes of double bogeys or whatever, you're not coming back. No. And Shooter was doing pretty well, so. And probably the biggest plot hole something we've talked about multiple times already. He would have been in jail throughout this movie. Yeah, you can't just punch people or throw people through windows. It's okay. Cringy, really? Nothing here. Alright, got some questions for you. Was this the movie that invented the hockey stick putter? I don't know. I mean, I know they sell it. I know it's a real thing. Definitely could have. All right. So the team he tries out for it's this adult men's league town hockey. They didn't need a Fulton Reed type enforcer with a heavy, heavy shot. You would think if you would shoot the puck that hard, they would keep you. Yeah. I just find a role for you. Also, he wants to try out again next year, but then he beats up the coach. Not a good strategy. You know, one of his shots, he hits it into the pond and he jumps in to find it. a Water is crystal clear that the cleanest golf course water you've ever seen. It might be the cleanest water I've ever seen. I think it's cleaner than this water I'm drinking. Yeah, it might be. Why was he so mean to the couple at the driving range? The ones that were like, oh, you should go play in the water berry open. It was very aggressive towards him. Blows the raspberry. I don't know. That didn't make any sense. Also, Chubbs, he just carries around the alligator eye with him everywhere he goes. Is he just hoping people ask him about his hands so we can just pull that out? Oh, yeah. He's like waiting for people to go. What happened to your hand? Well, you got a story for you. Is nine o'clock on the ninth green? Is that trick a real thing, do you think? I don't know. I don't know if it's just so known in the golf world because of this movie. Yeah. So Happy finds the alligator that took Chubbs' hand. He fights it and kills it. How does he get the head? How did he kill it? He just elbow dropped it. yeah I don't think that's killing an alligator. I feel like that would be very difficult to get the head off of an alligator. Subway, they are prominently featured.
00:49:21
Speaker
Happy does an incredible commercial for them. How much did they pay to be featured in this movie, do you think? I feel like this did wonders for Subway. Happy Gilmore, first Subway spokesperson. A lot better than the follow-up person. Yes, you're absolutely right. They were slicing the bread the old way with like the V across the top. Yes. Oh, I forgot about that. ah Do you think Shooter would really buy his grandmother's house? And also, how would he know which one it was? No. I mean, I don't know. The bigger thing to me is just how did he know which house in yeah Waterbury was his grandma's? I mean, maybe you could have figured that out, but I doubt it. He's pretty petty. I don't know. What's his plan when he steals the gold jacket? I don't know. I think once again, he just like snaps and he's like, I'm taking this jacket. It's like, well, you didn't earn it. Yeah. What are you going to do with it? And if you're like a competitor, like you want to earn it, you display that and be like, oh, tell me about the tournament. Well, I lost. Yeah. hold
00:50:07
Speaker
I have a question. So Happy Gilmore never swings a golf club before and can magically drive the ball 450 yards completely straight. This made me think of the best unrealistic athletic talent in movies. Here's what I got for my top five honorable mention. Henry Rowan Gardner from rookie of the year talked about it on the show before the freak ligament healing led to him throwing over 100 miles an hour. I would sign up for that surgery in a heartbeat. Same. At number five, I'm going happy Gilmore. Sure, people can drive the ball as far as him, but no one that has never swung a golf club before can consistently drive the ball perfectly straight. At number four, Fulton Reed from The Mighty Ducks. We've broke it down in an earlier episode, but he was consistently shooting the puck over 130 miles an hour as an 11-year-old.
00:50:53
Speaker
At number three, I'm going Rocky Balboa. No one man can get punched square in the face as many times as he did per match and not get knocked out. Just Google boxer punch square in the face. They get knocked out cold every time. And it would happen to Rocky no less than 74 times per match. Coming in at number two, Air Bud. There's nothing in the rules that says a dog can't play basketball, but this dog was a better shooter in the post than Shaq and had more range than Caitlin Clark. And coming in at number one, Benny the Jet Rodriguez from Sandlot. Now, Benny the Jet was one of the greatest athletes of our generation and he did outrun a dog. So I don't put much out of the realm of possibility for him, but Benny using a magical spitball to hit the ball directly into Small's glove who was about 180 feet away without him having to move his hand on the first try is insanity. This coming from a baseball coach that hits a ton of fungus.
00:51:48
Speaker
What makes it more impactful was it led to the rest of the guys actually liking Smalls and then changed Smalls life forever. Nice, I like that. Unrealistic athletic talent. That was a great list. All right, when I think about these plot holes, I mean, both movies have a bunch of random things, but for me, Despite the fact that I don't think a school would allow Billy Madison to go back, I think the two big things from Happy Gilmore, him never swinging a golf club and hitting a ball perfectly straight, and him not ending up in jail for all of the assault, I think that pushes it as the loser. Yeah, his consistency to drive a ball perfectly. He has like, what, one bad shot? like so It's when the heckler is talking to him. Put an asterisk on that one. So Billy Madison is winning this round. We are tied two to two, heading into round five, our miscellaneous question of the week. We've talked about a lot of quotes already. So our round five question is, which movie is more quotable? Now we can take into account the quotes we've already mentioned, but let's go through just back and forth the ones that we didn't.
00:52:48
Speaker
The poop scene. Don't tell me my business, devil woman. Pretty quotable. There's a running gag in Happy Gilmore about his girlfriend. First, he says my girlfriend got hit by a car, she's dead, and then he has the bigger one, which is she fell off a cliff, died on impact. Thank you very much, Miss Lippy. You know that Mista-Mista lady? I think I killed her. Very, very quotable. So Eric gathers his intel from the janitor. These are the notes he gets. Billy likes to drink soda. Miss Lippy's car is green. Yeah, that's good. My fingers hurt. Well, now your back's gonna hurt. Cause you just pull landscaping duty. Anybody else's fingers hurt? Chris Farley. I mean, he's got a bunch, but I'll turn this damn bus around. Shooter McGavin, when Mr. Larson tells him that Happy Gilmore reached the green from there and Shooter says, well, moron, good for Happy Gilmore. Oh my God. He like turns and sees how big he is. That one made me actually laugh out loud very hard. Uh, I mean, old oil rules. You hear it so many times from all the generations of the old oils.
00:53:43
Speaker
What's this I heard about you breaking a rake and throwing it into the woods? I was just testing its durability and then I placed it in the woods because it's made of wood and I just thought he should be with his family. yes Take it easy, psycho. Man, I'm glad I called that guy. And then one of the most quotable lines from this movie by Shooter McGavin. You're in big trouble though, pal. I eat pieces of shit like you for breakfast. You eat pieces of shit for breakfast? No. Oh, this is a tough one. I think if we take into account some of these, but then the ones that we had mentioned throughout this episode already, I think Billy Madison has more quotable lines. Yeah, I think I find myself to this day quoting that movie more than Happy Gilmore. It is funny rewatching these again. And you're just like, wow, I say that a lot. Yes.
00:54:26
Speaker
That's not to discredit. There are amazing lines in Happy Gilmore. Oh, yeah, definitely goes both ways for both of them. It's a really difficult decision, but I agree with you. I say more lines from Billy Madison on a day to day basis. All right. Billy Madison takes a three to two lead heading into round six. Better trivia. Chris Farley's quote, good, great, grand, wonderful. That is the same quote that his character gives in Airheads. Also, Madison Mansion is the same house they used in X-Men. Bob Barker actually studied Tang Soo Do for decades under Chuck Norris. Whoa. And because of Bob Barker's cameo, ratings for The Price Is Right rose can considerably amongst college-aged viewers. That's awesome. At the academic decathlon, Billy Madison ends his answer by yelling, Nibhi Football Rules, which ends in awkward silence and the crowd erupts into cheers. The same thing happens in Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, where a high school student ends his uneducated speech with San Dimas High School Football Rules, also ending in awkward silence and the crowd erupts in cheers. I like Bill and Ted.
00:55:27
Speaker
In the opening scene of Happy Gilmore when they're showing all the footage, the hockey team that they show with Terry O'Reilly, the Tasmanian Devil, it's actually footage of a roller hockey team called the Vancouver Voodoo. If you pause it, you can actually see the wheels on the bottom of their shoes, not ice skates. I didn't even notice that. Terry O'Reilly, of course, a famous Boston Bruin. Nice, there you go. What do you think for this? I like the Bob Barker thing. Yeah, Chuck Norris was his neighbor, and he trained with him, which is pretty cool. I mean, everyone knows the prizes right. Our generation, like, you stay home sick, you watch the prizes right. I'm gonna go that. Okay, we'll go Happy Gilmore for round six. So we are tied three to three, heading into round seven. Better story, script, more fun.
00:56:08
Speaker
Both these movies fly. They're like an hour and a half. They feel like they're 15 minutes. Yeah, absolutely. I like how some of the Happy Gilmore characters are used in other Adam Sandler movies. So the Caddy shows up in Jack and Jill. Chubs shows up in Little Nicky. He's, I think, in heaven. And then Hal L shows up in Hubie Halloween. So I do like the callbacks there. We talked about it. I think the song in Billy Madison after he gets beat up is pretty weird. yes It's kind of out of place. I think the O'Doyles driving their car off the cliff is really dark.
00:56:42
Speaker
you It's like they didn't really know what to do with those characters and they're like, let's just have them drive off a cliff. Like, right what? Just really weird. It gets super cartoonish. Yeah. For me, when I think of a tighter script, I think Happy Gilmore is tighter. While I think Billy Madison is hilarious, I just feel that Happy Gilmore is a better written movie and the ending ties things together a little neater than in Billy Madison. I like the plot arc in Happy Gilmore. Everything stays like the same in terms of the jokes and the seriousness and how funny it is. Whereas when you mentioned Billy Madison is just like, it gets a little too ridiculous. Obviously it's a ridiculous movie. They both are. But I think Billy Madison kind of pushes it a little too much. That song, I don't know, it's still, i even when I watch it now, I'm like, it doesn't do anything for me. But the way Happy Gilmore ends with the tournament, way better ending than Billy Madison.
00:57:32
Speaker
I love both of these movies so much, and you'll see it in my rankings, but I think Happy Gilmore is my favorite comedy ever. well I'm not saying it's the best movie, I just think it's my personal favorite comedy ever. I do like that disclaimer that you made, because I think a lot of times, like if you mention, like for me, Tommy Boy, that's my movie. If you think about some of these movies, it's like, of course they're not like Shawshank Redemption or The Godfather. Who cares? Like, that's your favorite movie. Yeah. someone may think that's the worst movie ever. All right, so I think we're both in agreement. Happy Gilmore takes round seven and wins the Adam Sandler movie showdown. It's tied on the 18th. Billy Madison shanks a putt. Happy Gilmore drains the birdie for the victory. I am excited. They announced pretty recently a Happy Gilmore 2 sequel is coming out. It's definitely not going to live up to the first one. Right. But I'm interested in seeing what they do with this.
00:58:26
Speaker
Alright, what are you ranking these movies? I'm gonna go 93, Happy Gilmore 92, Billy Madison. Initially, I had a tie, but I can't. Happy Gilmore, I think, just eeks ahead. I am going Happy Gilmore 98. Yes. And Billy Madison 93. Wow, that's good. These were two great ones to finish the season with. What a blast this has been this season. Think of the range of movies we've done. Well, if you have not seen all the movies that we've talked about, take this summer, go back, watch some of them, listen to the episodes. We will be back at the end of August with new episodes. Until then, make sure to connect with us on the socials. We'll be posting new stuff on there all summer. This has been The Movie Showdown with Rock and Rob. Make sure to like, subscribe, rate and review all that fun stuff. And follow us on all the socials at Rock and Rob Show. Until next time, peace. I'm out of here. No yelling on the bus.
00:59:20
Speaker
Yes.