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Episode 63 - Ranking Even More Every Adventure Game Ever Again!
2 Playsin 4 hours
We begin by answering the BIG question: What happened to Sobe?
And then we talk about video games, I guess. Because that’s what you demand of us.
THIS WEEK we rank a bunch more adventure games – WHETHER WE’VE PLAYED THEM OR NOT. After Matt tells everyone about a free Rusty Lake game, we dive into the List ™ and throw 10 new games on our DEFINITIVE list!
Email us! mattandroses@gmail.com
Games Mentioned:
- The Beekeeper’s Picnic
- The Drifter
- The Dagger of Amon Ra
- The Mr. Rabbit Magic Show
- Rusty Lake Series
- Turlock Holmes
- Toska
- Rosewater
- Reviver
- Quantum Witch
- Session
- Neon Hearts City
- Expelled
- Canteloupe Chronicles
- New Mage
- Urban Myth Resolution Center
- Slender Threads
- Time Paradox
- Helheim Hassle
- Forgotten Hill Tales
- Softporn Adventure
- Saint Kotar
- The Shine of a Star
- Love: A Puzzle Box Filled With Stories
- American Arcadia
- Cleopatra: Riddle of the Tomb
- The Labyrinth of Time
Recommended
Transcript
Post Office and Door Etiquette
00:00:00
Speaker
Yesterday, I went to the post office, and the post my post office has to has an indoor and an outdoor with a divider in between.
00:00:13
Speaker
It's not double doors. want to make that clear. Okay. I don't know if I understand. What do you mean? It has an outdoor. but Like, there's doors. an outdoor! You don't even want to know what I was envisioning. I was literally envisioning an outdoor post office. The outdoor part of the post office, like in Perfect Pides.
00:00:32
Speaker
Yeah, like you like an indoor-outdoor pool. It has both. I'm like, what are you even saying right now? Do they ever have an indoor-outdoor pool where you can swim
00:00:46
Speaker
underwater to get from one to the other yes yes i went to one when i was young me and my dad like went swimming in there and they had a divider and you go under it and then you're in the indoor section cool yeah okay so i was about i was going into the post office and there's a woman in front of me and she opens the door and a man's coming out at the same time as we're going in so she's opening the the door to go in and again remember it's not double doors there's a divider there a man is going out at the same time oh no and he opens the door and he stands there and holds it and looks at her like he's holding the door open for her yeah he is what uh a yard away from her okay
00:01:36
Speaker
She would have to have closed the door, turned around, walked over past the divider and into his door to go to for that to have been beneficial.
Wawa and Mayonnaise Conspiracies
00:01:48
Speaker
And he's just and she. and She had already opened the door. She was already halfway in it. Right. Right. And he's just standing there holding the door. And here's the weirder thing.
00:02:01
Speaker
She says, oh, thank you. I mean, well, what are you supposed to say? jerk face, what are you doing? No, you say, what are you doing?
00:02:12
Speaker
you just ignore him because what is he doing? Maybe he had like a moment. You think he just like lost track of where he was and what. This is why I needed to let say it wasn't a double door. Because if it's a double door, even if you're going in the other one, it is kind of polite. I don't know. I don't know what it is. It's like, oh well, now you have more space. it like and then that's That's how Wawa works, right? you It's always double doors.
00:02:42
Speaker
And I've said this on the podcast before. You always hold the door open at a Wawa. If anybody's ever on the East Coast near Pennsylvania, And you go to a Wawa. You hold the door open for anybody. It doesn't matter if they are 30 seconds away.
00:02:59
Speaker
You stand there like a sentinel. And you hold that door open. and that is how well it goes there yeah That is how Wawa works. You hold the door open for the people coming in. You hold the door open open for the people behind you.
00:03:11
Speaker
ah For whatever reason. That is how every Wawa works. And it is aberrant when somebody does it. Everybody looks at them like, what the fuck? This is a Wawa.
00:03:23
Speaker
Anyway, this wasn't a Wawa. This is the fucking post office. And they were different doors. They're different doors.
00:03:33
Speaker
Oh, my God. Do you know what happened? He was a victim of mayonnaise gate. They're putting weird things in the mayonnaise. And he had a moment. This is what's happening all around the world.
00:03:45
Speaker
All around the world. Old men are holding open doors for nice, nice middle-aged ladies that the middle-aged ladies aren't going through.
Podcast Introduction and Personal Anecdotes
00:03:54
Speaker
Their brains are like buffering, you know?
00:03:56
Speaker
Imagine you're walking into a building and you look to your left and like, On a completely different wall. Somebody's walking out of the building and they hold the door open and start nodding at you. And
00:04:13
Speaker
and do you shout? you go, thank you. Thank you.
00:04:42
Speaker
Me or you to bring in? think it's me this time, right? It is. Unless you want to, unless you'd love to. You can do it. um sa i will I will sacrifice this for you. Okay. but i Even though I did cut my finger and I do have a boo-boo.
00:04:56
Speaker
Okay, you do it then.
Nostalgia for Sobe Drinks
00:05:01
Speaker
right, I'll do it. Yay.
00:05:05
Speaker
I didn't expect that. ah Okay. Yeah, sure. Hey, everyone. Welcome back to Save Your Game. I'm Pushing Up Roses, one of your lovely hosts. With me, as always, Matt Aukamp, giving me the giggles.
00:05:18
Speaker
Hey, hey. I'm also one of your lovely hosts. i Actually, you didn't give me the giggles. I think I gave it to myself, which is very embarrassing. was saying funny stuff. you were You're funny.
00:05:31
Speaker
You're funny. You do the things. It's all right. Yeah, no, I'm sure you said something funny. I'm sure somebody found it funny. How's it going, Rizis? It's good.
00:05:42
Speaker
It's good. i'm actually excited because our oh i've I'm just really happy with the last podcast episode, to be quite frank with you. Oh, yeah, it was fun. It was a it was a fun one.
00:05:53
Speaker
And so will this one be.
00:05:59
Speaker
so will be this one. So will be this. So be. Well, this one. So be one. So be one. So be one. comes from the heart. Do you think. Oh, man. Remember Sobe drinks were like a big deal?
00:06:16
Speaker
No, but do remember Orbitz? Yes, I remember Orbitz. They still have those in Canada. do so No. Sobe flavored beverages. They were like a big thing in the 90s around the same time as Orbitz, which Orbitz failed miserably. like Really badly.
00:06:33
Speaker
Yeah. um But Sobe didn't. remember these. succeeded very, very. it was People loved these things and everyone was drinking them. Do you think at the time...
00:06:47
Speaker
there's everybody somebody who is so into Sobi those friends called him Sobi Wan Kenobi yes okay absolutely if you if you're thinking it someone else is thinking it and you know this to be true
00:07:02
Speaker
yes also I I for whatever reason I didn't clock the name Sobi but when I google image searched it I'm like oh you see that little lizard yep you see the lizard the even the logo the Sobi yes so they still make this or no I don't don't know.
00:07:19
Speaker
I don't know. do they no i mean it's ah like When you look it up, most of it is ah like snack history. But this says... Okay, there's an article from marketrealist.com.
00:07:34
Speaker
I'm not endorsing them. i have no idea if they are. um But craving a Sobe drink? Where to find the once popular beverage?
00:07:46
Speaker
Where have Sobe drinks gone? If you're like dozens of Twitter users who have been flooding the platform seeking answers to this looming question. There's dozens of us. Dozens. Rest assured as we have some answers for you.
00:07:59
Speaker
Oh. We have been on the hunt for a Sobe drink. All right. We'll skip down a little bit. It was a Pepsi product. They have a product locator.
00:08:10
Speaker
You can buy them online. Yes. i see you can buy them online.
00:08:17
Speaker
um Product locator. Let's click on the product locator. Where can I find my lovely Sobeys? you have to You have to search for a specific one. and i'm Okay, I'm going to search for tsunami.
00:08:33
Speaker
And you can search for like whatever else you want. i'm doing so I'm just going to search for all of them. If you search for just tsunami. but Wait, I don't even see tsunami. Oh, okay. That's the strawberry daiquiri one. Yeah, right strawberry daiquiri.
00:08:45
Speaker
And enter postal code. I guess I'll put our enter mine. I'm not telling you perverts what it is, though.
00:08:54
Speaker
Mine's not working. Okay, hold on. him oh i'm there you I'm zooming out. I'm zooming out. I'm just going to type in Chicago. Okay, that's the whole... Alright, I'm looking at the whole planet and there's nothing.
00:09:07
Speaker
ah Yeah. I put in the entirety of Chicago and nothing. Not a single... nothing Okay, what if what if we try what if we try like Florida? I bet Florida. Florida.
00:09:19
Speaker
Florida seems like a place that would have Sobey Lifewater.
00:09:24
Speaker
Okay. Nope. No, not even in Florida. Hey, alright, listeners. Write us... If you... If there's Sobe where you live, write us at mattandroses at gmail.com. Let us know.
00:09:42
Speaker
Also, are you willing to send me Sobe? will pay for it and the shipping. Okay. Well, yeah there's that.
Revisiting Old Media
00:09:50
Speaker
I don't want an Orbitz. I do. I mean, but here's the thing. Orbits are fully discontinued. You're never going to get a fresh Orbit. i thought there was orbits i thought there were Orbits still in Canada.
00:10:03
Speaker
I don't think so. You know what, though? You know what comes really close to an Orbit is the summer, like, the the berry drink from Starbucks. It has little, like, bobas in it.
00:10:15
Speaker
It's giving Orbit. Even the color is giving Orbit. huh So was Orbit just a soda inside?
00:10:24
Speaker
Okay. And then and then it had a little jelly. Okay, and were the jelly beads... Were these tapioca like in ah like a like a like a boba?
00:10:39
Speaker
No, they were and gelatin, but it gives the same like the same texture, the same sensation. i mean, they were like barely food, we're honest.
00:10:50
Speaker
Oh, yeah, it's gone. It looks like they they yeah they lived in...
00:10:56
Speaker
Oh, man. Yeah, we can never have an Orbitz, ever.
00:11:01
Speaker
We can make our own. All right, let's do it. All right. While we're at... I'll make a pineapple... I'll make a pineapple berry cherry coconut. You make a blueberry melon strawberry.
00:11:13
Speaker
Okay. On it. I think I have corrupted my own brain by saying berry weird intentionally that now...
00:11:25
Speaker
I can't help it. And it's blueberry, strawberry, raspberry. Like, I can't. It's just I've changed my innate pronunciation of it from saying it dumb for too long.
00:11:37
Speaker
Well, that checks. So, Roses, how's your week been? It's good. Have you been playing any games or doing anything interesting?
00:11:48
Speaker
Sort of. um i'm abie I'm not playing a game, but I was so inspired by playing The Drifter, I decided to go ahead and write a whole review on it. So I'm going through the process of editing that and getting clips and reminding myself of the the mechanics and the things that happened. and Really stoked because ah the the devs ah liked it and pimped it out on Twitter.
00:12:13
Speaker
And the dev for Beekeeper's Picnic also commented and and said that they used to watch my let's plays and that i had a part in in them becoming like an adventure game fan i made the beekeepers picnic you're welcome okay well uh they've stopped being a fan now so they just turned off the podcast actually they emailed me ahead of time and said ah We know what she's going to say on this next this next episode.
00:12:47
Speaker
but So ah i'm I'm never making a game again, they said. Yeah, I'm cutting this all out of the pot. I have the power now. um Well, no, that's great. ah that's That sounds like it's going to be a fun video.
00:13:03
Speaker
Yeah, and I think gaming is a type of media where if you replay a game a few times, you are always going to find something else to be kind of enamored by or something you didn't see before.
00:13:14
Speaker
And that's true of movies as well. I think it's just more true of gaming because it is such an interactive media. there i ah yeah As you know, ah The Dagger of Amon Ra is one of my favorite games.
00:13:26
Speaker
And I've been playing it since I had gotten the King's Quest collection. I was like 12 years. and into adulthood, I was still finding like new conversations to eavesdrop. It was incredible. I'm like, I've never heard this before. This is incredible. And so, i' you know, I'm relooking at things and rethinking things.
00:13:45
Speaker
you know, about things I like or what they, you know, what they compare to. also watched a weird movie. i'm cool. Not weird. It's not going sound weird. It's, but it it, but, but it is totally contradicting myself.
00:13:58
Speaker
I watched the original 13 ghosts, which is a William Castle movie. ah okay you know, William Castle did the, all the, the B movies. He did um House on Haunted Hill and Waxworks and, or sorry, House of Wax, not Waxworks.
00:14:16
Speaker
waxworks is actually an adventure game my brain yeah he did the game waxworks and then they and then pivoted to movies when everybody hated it uh but i had only seen the there's a remake of 13 ghosts with uh matthew lillard back when he was like and yeah and tony shalhoub and f murray abraham Yes, yes, yes, it yes, yes. What a wild cast. Shannon Elizabeth is in it. Wild, wild. Okay. Yeah, it's a weird cast. And it's just a weird... I mean, the remake is fun, you know, because it's weird. It's it's not very good. It's got that, like...
00:14:54
Speaker
weird action horror thing it's almost scream like but it's just not good enough to be that and i'm like i don't haven't seen the original 13 ghosts uh so i watched it with another horror fan and i'm like yep that uh that was a movie that oh really it didn't was made Well, we were trying to speculate if that could scare people at the time.
00:15:21
Speaker
um And granted, William Castle movies, they're gimmicky. So they're meant they were meant to be seen in theaters where they could put on a gimmick. They're meant to be seen and not heard.
00:15:31
Speaker
No, it had to be heard, too Oh, okay. Oh, sorry. Yeah, okay. Yeah, it's kind of an important. No, I've never seen a wheel William Castle movie. Yeah, I mean, they, so for like their movie, The Tingler, which is a very strange name. he's that guy.
00:15:48
Speaker
He's that guy. Yeah. So he, for that one, the theater seats would like vibrate or in house, ah house on a haunted hill. There was like a quote 3d. So if the gimmick 13 ghosts was obviously it's not going work because I'm not in a theater, but the gimmick was you put on like these little ah vision goggles, these little 3d glasses, and you can see the ghosts better because the ghosts appear in like this red artifacted way. So it's so funny. Like in the beginning, do you guys have the glasses. No,
00:16:17
Speaker
okay No. And it's fixed for, you know, I think and but maybe it's through Amazon or something. but So it's fixed. like it's You can watch it. It's fine. But it's so funny. In the beginning of the movie, you know, you've got that host-type character explaining, ah, welcome to this podcast.
00:16:33
Speaker
Great movie. Now be sure to what to put on your ghost vision goggles. Now, if ah you if you believe in ghosts, look through the first window.
00:16:44
Speaker
But if you don't believe in ghosts, look through the second window. Who's going to look through the second window? Like,
00:16:54
Speaker
Why would you do that? Interesting. But it was fun enough. And one of the characters... ah There's somebody in the theater that's like, feel like so adamant about that belief that they can't even enjoy a movie that's like saying that as a gimmick. no I don't.
00:17:13
Speaker
I don't believe in ghosts. I won't look at it. I'm a skeptic. ah know yeah There's time. there's Yeah, exactly. It's like, they're like, no, oh he's just, it's just a playful thing. He's just saying, no, I don't believe in ghosts. I know.
00:17:28
Speaker
And like these scenes with the ghost, with the ghost viewer, they kind of last a while. So I'm just like imagining someone who's looking through the, ah or or not even wearing them, just like watching the most boring scene where nothing happens.
00:17:43
Speaker
Well, that's so funny. i So I've been watching a bunch of old movies lately. I've i've got this long term, you know, Listeners might know this about me so far.
00:17:55
Speaker
might have They might have gleaned it. Is that I have a broken brain and I turn everything and into a project. everything Everything in my whole goddamn life I turn into a project rather than just enjoying life.
00:18:10
Speaker
You do be doing that. So... ah I started a project a while back and it's not a public project. It's just a private project. Sometimes projects are private. They're not to be shared.
00:18:21
Speaker
This isn't for you. This isn't for you. This is mine. The project is just trying to work my way through all of the Oscar winners, all the best picture winners of all time. yeah yeah Starting in 1927 with the silent film wings.
00:18:39
Speaker
It's about pilots. It was actually, was right. Well, I thought it was about chicken wings. So my mind is blown. Did they have chicken wings in 1927? Listen, my point is, I've been watching, I watched a movie from 1938 called You Can't Take It With You.
00:18:57
Speaker
And it was like a comedy. But old fucking movies, man, were so slow. They are slow, yeah.
00:19:08
Speaker
there would be a funny thing happening. And it would just sit on it for a long time. Yeah. Or like people reacting to it just quietly.
00:19:20
Speaker
And you're like, what? Okay. Like, if I were laughing, I would have been done laughing by now. Right. What do you expect from me in this, this like full Right.
00:19:34
Speaker
right um i think that I think the 70s were the worst for for bad pacing, especially 70s horror. don't know if you've ever seen The Omen. I was dying.
00:19:45
Speaker
And I like spooky films. I like horror adjacent things. I was literally dying. Like, I'm too bored to be scared. Yeah, there's just something about that pacing, man. They just took their time for for whatever reason. But so, yeah, you know exactly what you mean. It's like, and cut.
00:20:05
Speaker
Nope, not there. i did cut. Oh, okay. Yeah, I'm, yeah. I've got, all right, I got the joke. I got how everybody has reacted to it. There's, I'm gaining nothing from this 10 seconds. Oh, now it's 11 seconds. Okay. 12, 13, huh? 14. Oh, wow. You're really going for 15, huh?
00:20:23
Speaker
It like comes for full circle and becomes funny again. Comes funny again, yeah. You've waited so long that you've lost your mind. you just start laughing. I just watched 1941's How Green Was My Valley.
00:20:35
Speaker
That sounds sexual. No, it was sad. no. It's about the mining industry destroyed whales. Oh, my God. I don't want to watch that. Yeah.
00:20:47
Speaker
I love the whales. No, not the whales. Hey, boy, oh, boy, oh, boy. Want to hear what I've playing? What? I played a game that came out this year, and I didn't. i It passed me by.
00:20:59
Speaker
it floated right past me. yeah Okay. Rusty Lake released a free game in April. called mr rat the Mr. Rabbit Magic Show.
00:21:11
Speaker
I did not know.
Adventure Games Recommendations
00:21:13
Speaker
So they announced a new game, Servant of the Lake. There's no release date on it yet. But it's you know going to be the next Rusty Lake game. And I was looking at their page, and was like, what?
00:21:25
Speaker
There's a game here I didn't even know about. Holy shit. So I played it, um and it's it's interesting. it is It is basically... There's some...
00:21:37
Speaker
I wouldn't say it's in continuity, but then it's hard to tell with Rusty Lake and Cube Escape stuff. Sure. Because everything wraps into itself at some point. Sure. And it it has a lot of the Rusty Lake tropes and characters and little things in it.
00:21:52
Speaker
Mm-hmm. But it's it's basically like a It's their like free thank you gift to fans for 10 years of Rusty Lake.
00:22:04
Speaker
And... and There's... You're gonna start this game and you're gonna be like, eh, I don't know, this is kind of lame. Because it is... You're looking at Mr. Rabbit on stage in a magician's costume. He's got a hat and a wand.
00:22:23
Speaker
And you're doing... the most simple puzzles and then the curtains close and then it goes to like an act two act three right and it's things like he's holding up five cards and you just have to click them in order you know okay all right sure and then he's and holding his hat and a hand comes out and it's got one finger up so you click on his wand one time and then the hand holds up two fingers you click on his one two times and then also three fingers and click three times and then once you get to five ah there's like a there's like a little celebration noise and then the curtain closes and you're like ah okay um but you do that for about 10 minutes and you'll get to an actual kind of cube escape style game that takes place in the rusty lake uh development offices mm-hmm
00:23:21
Speaker
And it's just cute. It's just a cute. It's not a tough one. It's really... it's really it's It's kind of a simple one. Trying to find all the achievements is tough. I still haven't done it yet.
00:23:33
Speaker
ah But... The actual getting through it is a very, very simple. um But it's cute and it's fun and it's free. It's Mr. Rabbit magic show. It's it also Rusty Lake's been around for 10 years. How awesome is that? saying No, that's fantastic.
00:23:52
Speaker
I love that. i love it when a company is like, here you go. It's for free. Yeah. Yeah. ah Very sweet of them. Very, just very cool. They're such a cool company and they put out such cool games and they just, just consistently, like every year they release a game and it is good and and fun and builds on this lore. And i love that. I love that about them.
00:24:17
Speaker
Yeah. And that they support other smaller developers As, ah like, especially artsy developers, remember on our Christmas episode, we played the, the, um, the, the cat game.
00:24:30
Speaker
The Milo and, not Milo and Otis, that's a Milo and Otis game. That would be such a sad, sad game. Terrible game. You do not want to play that game. I know what you're talking about, though.
00:24:41
Speaker
Yes. ah Yeah, yeah. the The Milo's Christmas gift, I think it was called. Yeah, very sweet. Very sweet game. Two the creators from Rusty Lake, you know, they have second maze. And that's who put out Milo and the Magpies, Milo and the Christmas Gift, The White Door, Mitoza, Follow the Meaning. they They, like, take risks on these um sweet little indie adventures.
00:25:01
Speaker
Yeah. ah So they're just, again, just a great company. I just, I really, I respect them. I admire them. I like their games. That's great. Aw.
00:25:11
Speaker
It's cool that they've been around for 10 years. That's lovely. That's cool that there's another there's another Rusty Lake game coming out, Servant of the Lake. Nice. Nice. Yeah, I got to get back into, now that I'm not full of mold, you know, anymore, I'm finally getting to be like normal and I'm putting out videos and reviews and we're podcasting. So I want to get back to playing my beloved adventure games, you know?
00:25:37
Speaker
There's been some really great ones this year.
00:25:41
Speaker
Oh, yeah. I mean, we we said that. I think we've been saying that the last yeah two years we've been doing this podcast. Some that we haven't talked about on the show yet that have already come out this year that are sitting in like some of them I've played a little bit of and some of them I haven't played at all. But Turlock Holmes is out. Remember, we talked about the demo of that. Yep. Uh-huh.
00:26:02
Speaker
Yep. Tosca, which you turned me on to. Mm-hmm. which is a little, ah ah what looks like a sweet little, very chunky pixely adventure. Rosewater by Grunoslav Games. Yes, Rosewater.
00:26:16
Speaker
Reviver, which we talked a little bit about last episode. Quantum Witch, which is another chunky little pixel art game.
00:26:24
Speaker
I love chunky pixel arts, honestly. Obsession, which is a chunky little horror adventure game, which I really want to play. I can't endorse all these. These are just games that look good that I want to play.
00:26:37
Speaker
but but Neon Heart City, which is by a Cosmic Void. yeah, Neon Heart City. I remember being like very, very interested in that one.
00:26:49
Speaker
Expelled, which is the overboard, i think, per prequel. ah There's a chunky horror game called Centum. Oh, no, it's not chunky. It's just pixel-y.
00:27:00
Speaker
um Cantaloupe Chronicles, which is a sweet-looking little detective-y point-and-click game. And what's the other one that i was really that I want to play at some point?
00:27:16
Speaker
mean I'm going to find it. I'm going find it. I'm going find it. I'm going find it. I'm going find it. Do it. Oh, Near Mage. Okay. Also, like a cartoony adventure game. Looks cool. So a lot of cool games that, oh, Elroy and the Aliens is another one. Urban Myth Dissolution Center, which me and you played for a minute on. ah Yeah, which I really enjoyed that. I don't think you were getting the same experience because you were the watchy, you know, of the of the stream. It's harder. It really is. It's harder to to be engaged. But I really thought that that had a lot of great potential and I'd like to continue it.
00:27:50
Speaker
Slender Threads, a very stylized point-and-click game that with some horror vibes from this year. Yeah. just like
00:27:59
Speaker
It's a good time to get back into your adventure your beloved adventure games, Roses.
Ranking Adventure Games
00:28:04
Speaker
Absolutely. think it's always a good time, right? Even even if I'm just playing Grim Fandango for the 500th time. It's always a good time.
00:28:14
Speaker
ah but While we're talking about that, I had an idea. For today. Okay.
00:28:24
Speaker
I had this idea. What if... I know it hasn't been that many episodes since we last did this. But what if we talk about like a lot of adventure games today that we have or haven't played and we rank them? Well, what a novel idea.
00:28:45
Speaker
I had no idea that this was going to go where it's going. Yes! Let's rank every adventure games again for another time. Let's do it. Okay. So why don't we put on some skunky smoke arena and we'll come back and we're going to rank a bunch of adventure games.
00:29:03
Speaker
Woo.
00:29:21
Speaker
Hey everybody and welcome back to Save Your Game. I am one of your hosts, Matt Aukamp, with me.
00:29:30
Speaker
As always, it's never not been the case. On this show anyway. It's Pushing Up Roses. Hi! What up y'all? What?
00:29:41
Speaker
What up? Okay. If you guys, if this is your first episode, go listen to another one. But if this is your but if this is your second episode, but you haven't heard um but you haven't heard a Ranking Adventure Games episode, here's what we do.
00:29:59
Speaker
Wait, Rose, as you tell them. Here's what we do. have But yeah, if if this is your first episode, what are you doing? Why are you here? ah Go watch a different episode. Maybe the last one on the Drifter.
00:30:10
Speaker
But I will still explain that we are going to be randomly generating via Matt's amazing list of how many? 3,000, 4,000? Yeah, it's every adventure game ever made. So it is. ah Well, I haven't.
00:30:27
Speaker
All of 2025 isn't on here yet, but we're up to 3,500. Perfect. So we got a list, 3,500 adventure games. We are going to randomly generate them and rank them, whether we've played them or not.
00:30:43
Speaker
Literally does not matter. If we get a vibe, we're going to rank it high. If we get a bad vibe, we're going to rank it low.
00:30:53
Speaker
Yes. If it's King's Quest, it's going to number one. That's just how it is. The way we do it is we just, we I have a random number generator and I appended a ah number to each of these games and I pull up a number and we, that's the one we rank. We are allowed to skip one per, usually per episode, but when we do a whole episode, we do it in blocks. So we're allowed to skip one per block.
00:31:19
Speaker
If we're just like, I don't fucking know. I can't, I can't make a decision about this one. um We're allowed to skip one per block, but it stays on the list. And ah if we play one of the games, we're allowed to go back and change the ranking, which we recently did with Pine Hearts.
00:31:37
Speaker
Yes, that's allowed. i sove I've been meaning to play something, like maybe missing, missing since January. That's how you have to say that game. I don't know why. Since January.
00:31:49
Speaker
Since January. ah Now that I know I have that game for some reason, ah maybe I'll play it. And actually, people had nice things to say about it. But if I play that game...
00:32:00
Speaker
I can move it anywhere anywhere I want. This is what's frustrating about games that we had played before they ended up on our list, is that then we can't move them. Like, we discovered, we keep discovering a long time ago.
00:32:16
Speaker
I can't remember which one, but some of these games, we both have agreed over time or in the wrong spots. Yeah. Yeah. And it's just too late. We can't but we can't move them because we've already played them. Yeah.
00:32:29
Speaker
It yeah happens. But, I mean, we need to stick to the we need to stick to form. The two games that are not in the wrong spots but won't stay there forever, I guarantee, are number ones and number two, which is Portal and Portal 2. I think those were ranked correctly for the games that are on this list.
00:32:49
Speaker
Yes. But they're not. No, they're not going to stay there. There's no way. Unless we just never pull up like a so Monkey Island or Laura Bowe or whatever.
00:33:00
Speaker
but if What if we like don't make it to the end? Like what if we what if we stop the podcast before it's ending and Portal just stays number one? That cannot be our legacy. Likely that will happen, Roses. Yeah.
00:33:14
Speaker
Oh, no. It can't. It can't happen. We can't do this. All right. So, generally, i pull these ahead of time and I put them in blocks so um but so we don't have to just sit here while I... We don't have to edit out a lot of me looking for numbers.
00:33:29
Speaker
So...
00:33:32
Speaker
roses and and okay we we're we're just gonna keep going until we have a we have a time out at at a certain time tonight um roses has to go ah ah to her ah entomologist she's been she's got all these bugs that she needs identified and this is a really important entomologist and it's she doesn't do a lot of appointments.
00:33:58
Speaker
So, I mean, I feel special really, you know, you can't, yeah. So you can't, you can't miss it. You can't do that. Yeah. I need to know about the specific lady bug that I found in my home.
00:34:10
Speaker
Yeah. So we, so when we hit this unspecified time, we will, we will stop. But, uh, until then, let's see how many we can get done. Roses, give me a number.
00:34:23
Speaker
One through ten. and Okay. I don't think I've ever said two before in my entire life. and Say it as many times as you want now because it's a pretty common word. I think most people have a... Alright.
00:34:37
Speaker
So this... Most people have memories of the number two and you've got to start building them. Okay. I'll do that. Two! Alright. This a game from 1996. Oh, hell yeah.
00:34:49
Speaker
It is by Flare Software Limited. is a game from nineteen ninety six oh hell yeah it is by flare software limited And it is called Time Paradox.
00:35:05
Speaker
Okay, that sounds familiar. There is some full motion video in this game. Perfect. Looks like the cutscenes are full motion video. But in the meantime, it is like a pixel art game. You're a sexy woman.
00:35:18
Speaker
um Looks like in like you got sent back to prehistory and maybe at some point you go to the future. It looks like you go to a bunch of different time periods. It's real Callahan's cross time. I don't like it.
00:35:33
Speaker
I don't like it. I don't like this vibe. This is a bad vibe. I don't like it. It's got a LucasArts-y action-y menu.
00:35:43
Speaker
um What do you think is bad about this vibe? There's so much green. i can i That's what I like about it so far. like she's i don't like the setting.
00:35:56
Speaker
I don't like her outfit. think it's stupid. don't like this art. She's got a long-sleeve... sure But it's like a belly shirt. Yeah.
00:36:06
Speaker
And then she's just wearing like underwear. Like some panties, yeah. And then knee-high boots. There's also something off with the pixel art. it almost looks like It almost looks like photographs that were pixelated. There's just something off. I think it is photographs that were pixelated. which I don't like. I'm not fond of that.
00:36:25
Speaker
And it doesn't appear that these people are very good um pixel artists. So the stuff that is not that... is pretty bad um like there is there's a scene here where it's she's fighting a t-rex to save looks like a a caveman in a tree and this caveman looks like he's half the size of the t-rex he's so huge yeah He's so huge. She's so small. The T-Rex is so small. I don't know what's going on here.
00:37:00
Speaker
And there's some other stuff that's clearly drawn. Yes. Some stuff, yeah. Like in the backgrounds? that well It's like they stand out.
00:37:10
Speaker
It stands out so much. So yeah art, not great. As far as gameplay... um Looks like it's been reviewed very few places.
00:37:23
Speaker
Yes. But the reviews it has are pretty abysmal. Pretty bad. Yeah. don't care. Adventure Archive said graphically tied paradoxes corresponding to its age are real coarse pixelated splendor. i So already we disagree. So the one thing they said that was good about it we already think is bad.
00:37:42
Speaker
Great. So it's going to go. We got to put it kind of low. I just don't. Unprofessional German dubbing. Oh, it's one of those. Combining objects is not logical. It's one of those.
00:37:53
Speaker
Puzzles are quite long winded due to the slow walking speed.
00:37:59
Speaker
This is going to go low. it's it's i mean, it's going below the medi mediocre block for me because of the vibe. I don't like it. Really? I really am put off by it. Jeez. this was ah person, wouldn't that. I'm sorry, Flare Software Limited. If you're listening, the if you're not the views of each co-host do not necessarily reflect the views of the entire show.
00:38:22
Speaker
Sorry, you're doing very hard news right now. um No, I don't like it either. So, Time Paradox. It's not, you know, super low. make that clear. Yeah, I don't think it's going to go below, like... Okay, I don't think it's going to... And you guys can follow along. If you go to Instagram, you can see where our... And Instagram, saveyourgamepodcast.
00:38:44
Speaker
Pod? Saveyourgamepodcast? Saveyourgamepodcast, yep. If you go to Instagram, saveyourgamepodcast, you can see what our list is now. So I don't think it goes
00:38:55
Speaker
below, like,
00:39:00
Speaker
I think it goes below Minecraft story mode. Okay. Because even though we yeah That's the beginning of bad games, I think, in our head. At least in mine. and Yeah. um Which I don't know that Minecraft story mode is bad. i just know it's something I don't care about.
00:39:16
Speaker
Right. is it even top tier adventure game? Probably not. So that's why That's why, yeah that's only to me, that's the start of bad. Yeah. But I bet this is worse than Minecraft story mode.
00:39:29
Speaker
so Yeah. I'm going to say it goes above Super Jazzman, which looks racist.
00:39:37
Speaker
I'm sorry. did she Sorry. Did you say below or or above? Above Super Jazzman. Okay. Sorry. Yes. Which seemed seemed like it was racist, and that's why it made it so low. I mean, he's he that's always going to override something. Like, if there's something, like, very derogatory, yeah yeah that's always going to be – we're always going to put that lower.
00:39:59
Speaker
Here's what I feel like. I would rather, okay, if i if somebody gave me Batman Partners in Peril and Time Paradox, I'd be standing there holding two bad adventure games, and I'd rather play the one with Batman in it. So what I feel like is it should go in 94 immediately below Batman Partners in Peril.
00:40:16
Speaker
I am totally fine with that. Okay. I agree. I actually would play Batman over this game. But I would feel the same way about both of them. Like, I don't want to. I don't want. It's just if I'm forced, you know? Yeah. No, that's what I'm saying. So, like, that's why I think they go right next to each other. Yeah. Yeah.
00:40:33
Speaker
Yeah. All right. That's our first ranking. Next up from and more recent game, 2020. twenty twenty The studio perfectly paranormal.
00:40:45
Speaker
I haven't played this game to my shame, actually, I think. oh um I think this game looks good. And I think people have good things to say about it It's Helheim Hassle.
00:41:01
Speaker
So this is like a you're a Viking who can take your head off and throw it. It does solve puzzles. Amazing. i'm I'm there. I'm there with you.
00:41:13
Speaker
And i think people had generally a good time with this game. It looks kind of funny. It's like there's it's got some adventure game-y puzzles. It's got 2D platforming. yeah um yeah Yes, yes. i can I can tell exactly what kind of game this is going to be.
00:41:31
Speaker
um um Hard to tell the question. Yeah. I'm wondering, because it is such a hybrid. Mm-hmm. where would I actually put this as one of the top adventure games?
00:41:44
Speaker
You know? Right. Though our top two are Portal and Portal 2. True. True. Nope, that's very true. um But it is, you're right, you're right. It is a hybrid, so we do have to take that into account.
00:41:57
Speaker
um Good reviews on Steam and on gamespew.com. dot com yeah They give it a 7 out of 10, but mostly they have positive things to say about it.
00:42:12
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Not all is perfect on the road to hell. For everything that makes Hellheim Hassle great, there's a less than stellar design choice that dampens the overall enjoyment of the game. and um That's from Kim Snaith on GameSpew. Okay.
00:42:32
Speaker
Solving puzzles that rely on fast action and and quick precision is tough. That would frustrate me. Sure. Okay. So knowing that I'm looking at our list, it's unhinged. ah um I'm wondering where, what block to actually put this in because it it goes in the top half for sure. Well, that's not saying much. We have 110 games on here.
00:43:01
Speaker
on here I think goes was in the bottom half of the top half. Okay. So you are going to put it in mediocre. The bottom half of the top half. Sorry. The bottom half. This is very confusing.
00:43:13
Speaker
I know. i'm I'm being confusing on purpose. I think what what I'm looking at is around like
00:43:22
Speaker
like midnight girl maybe. Okay. If you had this and and midnight girl, where were you looking? I was looking at Pine Hearts.
00:43:33
Speaker
so I was looking at that area. We've got Jordan's Flight of the Amazon. Because I think it needs to maybe go below Ben Jordan is my is my argument. i think I think that's too low.
00:43:46
Speaker
I think this is a much more polished game than the Depends on the Okay, that's fair. I like that you were looking around Pine Hearts because you have ah couple of these hybrid adventures in a row. You got Pine Hearts, Shady Part of Me, Midnight Girl.
00:43:58
Speaker
All three of those are sort of, there's a um platformer aspect to them. Yeah. And I think this is less exciting looking than Shady Part of Me, but more exciting than Midnight Girl, which I've played a little bit of.
00:44:15
Speaker
Where was Midnight? Okay. I still think Midnight Girl's really high. ok So now I'm, but now I'm more in your area. So now I'm looking at Amos ah amos Green's Final Repose. That's where i'm I've knocked it down with you.
00:44:29
Speaker
I'd be willing to put it in the middle somewhere as a compromise. So like above Agatha Christie, yeah but below the pawn.
00:44:40
Speaker
Yes. Alright. Settled. and we can't... This is one of the things... We can't spend too long... ah ah fretting over this stuff. Because we haven't played these fucking games. I know. It's not like we've played these. We haven't played them.
00:44:59
Speaker
We have to make good decisions here. We're just making it up. And I think the people reason people enjoy listening to this, I hope, I think... Is that, number one, it's a ridiculous thing to do. Number two, it allows us to talk about the things we do know about adventure games. Yeah. Which is, for the fact, which it doesn't feel like it, given how many games on this list we've never played, but we know a lot about them.
00:45:27
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. sometimes we find something on here that we're like, I need to go play that right now. All right, next one.
00:45:39
Speaker
FM Studio from 2022, they released a game called Forgotten Hill Tale. but Forgotten Hill?
00:45:51
Speaker
Forgotten Hill Tale. Tale. Forgotten Hill Tales. Tales. Tales. Okay. um Yeah, it's on it's on mobile. It's also on ah Steam.
00:46:04
Speaker
it's like ah It looks kind of like a... It looks very indie, very homemade. Sure. um But, well, like, by somebody who has some skill, at like some artistic skill, but is an amateur, clearly.
00:46:26
Speaker
Sure. And yet, there is a quality about them, you know? Yeah, they have ah they they clearly have a strong design sense.
00:46:37
Speaker
Yeah. It doesn't... like Like, when they're designing these rooms, they have interesting, like... They interesting vibes to them, and... It's clearly Rusty Lake-inspired.
00:46:54
Speaker
It has... it it it appears to be... escape room style like point and click escape room yeah like rusty lake or cube escape there's a bunch of mini games
00:47:12
Speaker
there is a there's an ancient egypt theme to it oh love that um on their own website there's a lot of there's there's some diehard fans and okay i mean those have these these do seem to have positive reviews Yeah, and Steam, it's got good reviews. On the Google Play app, it's got good reviews. People seem to enjoy it, which yeah can't be our full metric,
00:47:39
Speaker
um but means a lot. Yeah. And it looks like the um mobile port is really well done.
00:47:51
Speaker
And they've done a bunch of these. There's Forgotten... or is Forgotten Hill Tales maybe a collection I'm not sure. i do see the front little below here. looks like a spinoff of the Forgotten Hill game. So there's Forgotten Hill, Disillusion, Forgotten Hill, Surgery, Fall, Wardrobe, Puppeteer, Mementos.
00:48:07
Speaker
So very much like the Rusty Lake games. Yeah. I mean, and i would I would argue that these do really follow and a certain type of of adventure game form, right? Maybe even more than the last game.
00:48:22
Speaker
yeah That being said, I'm open to wherever you want to put this. um I don't know. Yeah, because i like these I like these kind of games more than you do. Yeah, for sure. um you could you you know you could um compare it to other games in that in that genre, like Cube Escape and things like that.
00:48:41
Speaker
Yeah, and there's no... There is a Cube Escape game on here, so this is gonna... So if we put... If we take that as, like, our marker, this is gonna go significantly below that, because it's right not to that level of quality.
00:48:56
Speaker
Yeah. um But... I've been... this is... Maybe a pattern I'll need to break, but not yet.
00:49:07
Speaker
um I've been doing a thing where I keep wanting to put games next to games that are similar to them today. ah Okay. So I'm looking at Through Abandoned, The Underground City, and that is also very much in this style. Okay. Okay.
00:49:25
Speaker
So I'm going to say Through Abandoned looks a little better than Forgotten Hill Tales, but not by much. So what if i put it what if we put it right below that, above We Were Here Forever?
00:49:37
Speaker
That means it's going above Dark Grim Mariupolos, and I don't know if I could live with myself if I put this above it. Dark Grim Mariupolos is pretty low.
00:49:47
Speaker
It's pretty low. Guys, we fucked up. Well, this whole thing is fucked up. It's all fucked up. but know i i trust your I trust your judgment.
00:49:59
Speaker
Put it where you feel it needs to go. all right All right. Then I'm going to leave it where it is. It's the new number 52. d two All right. Got it.
00:50:10
Speaker
Roses. Yes. I generally leave.
00:50:17
Speaker
Oh, my gosh. What are we even going to do about this? Oh, no. What? I generally leave text adventures off of this. Okay. Okay. But I felt like I had to leave this one on.
00:50:28
Speaker
Okay, what is
00:50:31
Speaker
On the list, I'll say this. I'm going to let you guess. On the list of every adventure game ever, in chronological order, this is number nine.
00:50:46
Speaker
What do you mean? but It is number nine. It's the ninth ever released adventure game. Oh my god. i i didn't even register what you were saying. I'm like, what are you even saying? what And so I'll say this, this is a re-release.
00:51:01
Speaker
ah So it was released even before this. It's fully text, right? um Like fully? Okay, thank you. Is it soft porn adventure?
00:51:13
Speaker
It is soft porn adventure. Oh my god. Amazing. i mean Which you can't just Google, by the way.
00:51:24
Speaker
I wouldn't. No. I wouldn't say that. I don't know why said Colossal Cave. That's not Sierra. But I thought maybe maybe they tried to do their I don't know. Guys, it's... Look.
00:51:36
Speaker
Listen. We're burnt out on games, Okay. Roberta Williams is nude on the cover of it. Sure is. I mean, she's nude. You don't she see anything, but... She's topless, at least. But yeah, she's in a hot tub. You can very almost see nipples.
00:51:51
Speaker
So this was kind of Let's cut that. So... yeah so
00:51:57
Speaker
No, I'm kidding. um so so So this is the game before lee that that inspired Leisure Suit Larry. i think it is maybe the same game. It is basically the exact same game as Leisure Suit Larry, only Leisure Suit Larry added some jokes, maybe a couple puzzles.
00:52:16
Speaker
Yeah. And ah it added graphics. It ah also air added the character of Larry Laffer. I think it's off-per-an-adventure. It's just like you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:52:27
Speaker
So what the hell do we even do with this? I do not know what to do with this. I'm going to be honest with you. It's important. It's incredibly important. sierra um Sierra wouldn't exist without it, right? Yeah.
00:52:42
Speaker
ah Gosh. ah So, but it sucks, but it's also first time. I know. It's it's it's oh it's such a like proponent.
00:52:54
Speaker
um Oh my God. I don't know what to do. It's not number one. Like we can't do that. No, no. one that Whoa, no, no. It's not even top 20. Okay. Is it above...
00:53:08
Speaker
What are we? This is so stupid. There's nothing that makes me realize how stupid this whole venture is in saying, okay, is soft porn adventure above Minecraft story mode?
00:53:24
Speaker
Is above the seventh guest at 63, which we put very low because we're biased. It's just so stupid. Well, okay. The seventh guest is – that's a very good point because the seventh guest is also one we hate and we put low because hate it. But it's an innovator.
00:53:38
Speaker
But it's innovative and it is um important. So that's why we put it higher than we wanted to. Yeah. Yeah.
00:53:47
Speaker
ah yeah so I think it's above Seventh Guest. I think I would enjoy playing it more than I enjoy playing Seventh Guest. It doesn't make me mad when I play it. I agree. Let's go with another kind of iffy one. Let's go up a bit.
00:54:00
Speaker
Is it above or below Flight of the Amazon Queen? That I was thinking, me and you, say same page club. Yeah, because i was thinking it's got to go. We can't put it below sleuth hounds. Correct. That would just be such a weird thing to do. No, we can't do that.
00:54:14
Speaker
We can't do that. I kind of think, what if we put it right above Flight of the Amazon Queen just because it's really funny to make it right next to ah Francisco's Ben Jordan games. Let's do it.
00:54:25
Speaker
Sorry, Francisco. The good news is you are better, in our opinion, than Soft Porn Adventure. Ben Jordan Paranormal adventure Investigator Case 1 is just a little bit better than Soft Porn Adventure.
00:54:44
Speaker
Not by much. and That's so funny. Okay, yeah, it's got to go there for that reason. It's the new 50, what is that, 51? No, 50. It is number 50. Okay. This next one.
00:54:58
Speaker
by Red Martyr Games. It was from 2021. I've heard of this game. I've not played it. It is St. Kotar. Spelled with a K?
00:55:11
Speaker
K-O-T-A-R. It is um three d that is... unacceptable for 2021. No, it looks looks like it runs the game. It looks like there's some really good 3D in it and some really bad. There's like really good art in it and really bad art in it.
00:55:31
Speaker
um sure It...
00:55:36
Speaker
ah
00:55:38
Speaker
It's a little horror-y, psychological horror detective game in rural Croatia. You don't see a lot of games set in Croatia. That's true. Um...
00:55:51
Speaker
It is mostly positive. Which can't be our only metric, but it it that is but again, it is important. um it on mean matter It's on that same page.
00:56:09
Speaker
oh It is giving me like, in in maybe, I don't know if this is good or bad. It's giving me some sanitarium vibes with kind of the questionable look of it, you know?
00:56:21
Speaker
I'll say the dead website never go there again, anybody. Adventure Gamers gave it a 50. Okay. okay Right in the middle. Dang. um Yeah, I mean, in on Metacritic, 49. Okay.
00:56:38
Speaker
okay I mean, i totally see the vibe, right? That this game is going... I've played games like this in this vein that were maybe a little more polished, but I have done it.
00:56:51
Speaker
um That's what's hitting me is there's something about this game that appeared that feels attractive to me. There's something about this game where I'm like, like ah kind of want to see what's going on there. i do yeah It kind kind of looks like an I don't know the story really, but it looks like a normal guy who gets caught up in a big paranormal um sort of horror story that turns into like a weird cult Yeah.
00:57:19
Speaker
Situation. I do like that kind of thing. Yeah. It does have a bleakness to it. It's not giving me like, oh, this vibe. I just don't like it. It's not giving me that. I am intrigued.
00:57:31
Speaker
I am very intrigued. I don't know if intrigue is enough to like put it high on a list of i also kind of... I also kind of like that there is a religious vibe to it. I'm not a religious guy, but I kind of like the mythology of religion. Yeah. and i So I like when this... So I like that as a theme.
00:57:57
Speaker
Yeah. um I do too. Generally, I do too. Yeah, I do too. I think it it can make for good storytelling and good plotline. I do agree that the 3D is a little unacceptable, but I don't know how much we want that to dictate.
00:58:14
Speaker
It's not the worst. I'll that. yeah has to everything It has to be part of it, right? Yeah. um i'm I'm watching the video now and the but voice acting is pretty bad.
00:58:25
Speaker
Okay. Was it dubbed? Or is it translated? or I am calm, but we both don't remember what happened here, is what he just said to me in my ears.
00:58:38
Speaker
um Where do we put a game where it's like, that's very appealing? Looks like a lot of people's feelings on it, based on reviews, and... and ah Man, this is tough.
00:58:53
Speaker
Based on reviews and ah and like professional and amateur reviews, it looks like a lot of people are saying, man, this game had promise and it didn't live up. It's a mess it's messy. and But somebody here says, avoid this game unless you're really into Eastern European Catholic folk horror.
00:59:10
Speaker
And yeah, I'm kind of really into Eastern European Catholic folk horror. No, I was going to say, I kind of like, I kind am though. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I like the vibes really. Like, ah okay. It looks a little grim, dark.
00:59:25
Speaker
It could have that kind of vibe. And that would be a bummer. You mean dark, grim? What are you saying? like I can't tell if you're referencing the game or if you're saying grim.
00:59:36
Speaker
There's a term, grim, dark. I have never heard of that. Now I'm never going to stop using it. It's like thing. There's a term grimdark for like, um it basically means it's something that's sort of unrelentingly. um ah Okay.
00:59:59
Speaker
Unrelentingly violent or dark or dystopian or um
01:00:07
Speaker
you know, like oftentimes trying to be
01:00:14
Speaker
trying to be a little too cynical or trying to be a little too gothic or something. um And it it has a little bit of that vibe to me, but not enough for me to be like, this looks like shit.
01:00:30
Speaker
Yeah. This one's tough too. So, okay, here's where I'm looking.
01:00:37
Speaker
i'm looking ah Honestly, I'm looking around Dark Grim Mariupolos and Corpse Party and Act of Murder. These all look like messy games that have something valuable in them. I agree with that.
01:00:49
Speaker
Um, it's but it's sleuth hounds are there. Baker street breakouts, right? All these games that will of Arthur Flabbington. This is a section of games above the mediocre block. That's like, these games have something. These games might end up being mediocre, but they have something special.
01:01:07
Speaker
Yeah. In them.
High Praise for American Arcadia
01:01:09
Speaker
Um, And Akronist, Many Happy Returns, another one in that section. So I think this goes in this. There's something special about it, but it is kind of mediocre. I agree.
01:01:22
Speaker
So what do you say putting it between hella cyberpunk thriller and mission critical? Just cause I don't remember either of those games. So why don't it? remember hella cyberpunk thriller and that's why I'm going to, I'm going to green light that. Yeah. i Okay. all right. So the new number 58. It eight games worse than soft porn adventure.
01:01:47
Speaker
Okay, so i'm dinged we didn't skip any, so we're not going to use our bonus sixth game. and Give me another number, Roses. Nine.
01:01:59
Speaker
Nine. Nine. Man, it would have been so funny if you had said five, but you didn't. So we're going to say, we're going to go with nine. Okay. Not too late. Oh, man. i can't, I don't want to influence the... All right, so, from 2012. Mm-hmm.
01:02:17
Speaker
from a developer called Forgotten Key. It is called the Shine of a Star. Okay.
01:02:28
Speaker
The Shine of a Star. Speaking of... Well, I don't know if it's grimdark. It's got a darkness to it.
01:02:37
Speaker
Okay. Okay, okay. Hmm. Yes. it looks scar Yes, yes. it does It does look interesting.
01:02:48
Speaker
there one Apparently, it's there's ah it's a it's a bit pixel-hunty. Okay. um Man, this looks like a tough one. um yeah There's some interesting graphics, but then there's some mixed with some shitty graphics.
01:03:03
Speaker
Yeah. There's like a picture. don't know. and't know and look You know what it looks like? It looks like it's got good graphics, but it's rendered poorly. ah Sure. Yeah, yeah.
01:03:14
Speaker
It looks... I mean, what year did this come out? 2012? twenty twelve 2012. You know. It's scum VM supported. i don't know that that matters. I don't know why that care that we care. yeah A lot of games are scum.
01:03:27
Speaker
Basically all games. ah I do like the intrigue of it. um the This kind of like unsettling weird fantasy screenshots. Some of them I'm seeing. It's reminding me of some of the unsettling scenes of like Fran Bow.
01:03:43
Speaker
um It doesn't look grimdark. It looks spooky. you do You know what I mean? Yes. And it also looks very dreamlike. It does look very dreamlike. Yeah.
01:03:56
Speaker
it It looks like...
01:04:00
Speaker
It looks like somebody's trying to do something very artsy. Yes. it This, I feel... That this might be one of those games. I could be wrong. We haven't played them. That is more of an you experience it.
01:04:14
Speaker
You don't necessarily play the game to have a thrilling plot. um It looks more of like an artistic endeavor to me. Apparently, it looks like... So there's no dialogue in the game. um People talk through picture bubbles.
01:04:31
Speaker
It is all point and click. It is mostly about discovery. Very few puzzles. um you know what
01:04:43
Speaker
It has a little bit of an Amanita feel to me, but like not like nowhere near as skilled. yeah But, you know, some of the... like the there's this There's these scenes where it's like this this barely defined little glowing white character walking along...
01:05:03
Speaker
um these big tree branches and stuff. yeah And that that gives me like a Samorost vibe.
01:05:13
Speaker
But Samorost is great. and You know, if you're going copy, if you know, if you're going be inspired by something, being inspired by Samorost is pretty rad. um But how does that translate into all these other adventure games that that it's competing with unwittingly?
01:05:29
Speaker
ah Not very high. I think this is pretty low. Okay. I'm with you. And that's not us saying that this is a bad game. No. You know? Yeah. i You know what? i Here's the and and and the two games that are leaping to mind as I'm looking at this ah that are on our list are Magnus Imago and Chop Suey.
01:05:53
Speaker
Two games that look both both look like they're doing something interesting but something I might not be super interested in. Yeah. So I don't know if it's fair to put it down in the 80s and ninety s I think it is fair.
01:06:06
Speaker
Okay. I think it is fair. And not all these games that are down here are necessarily the worst games you've ever played. Right. um Sometimes they just don't hit on what is where it's going to rank as an adventure game, you know?
01:06:21
Speaker
we can play it. Yeah, we can always play it. It might be the best thing ever. And then I'll move it, you know? So where do you – so if you agree that somewhere around there, I think it's got to go above Violet because I actively disliked Violet.
01:06:35
Speaker
um But where would you put it? I'm comfy with putting it right below Violet or even – have to think about this now. I was saying it should go right above Violet.
01:06:47
Speaker
Oh, above Violet. Okay. Got it. Not right above Violet. I'm saying it should go somewhere above Violet because I actively disliked Violet. I think it should go below the ugly Prince Duckling that actually looked very cute and like, you know, like an adventure game, especially for going on these these metrics.
01:07:04
Speaker
Okay. Do you... um
01:07:09
Speaker
Let me look. Oh, Chop Suey. I remember that. Man, that's in the same vein almost. so I would put it below Chop Suey too.
01:07:18
Speaker
Okay. Yeah, let's put it right below Chop Suey. Okay. that It feels like that makes sense in my little heart. and And we wouldn't want to disappoint your little heart, which signs like a star.
01:07:30
Speaker
So... Shine of a Star is our new number... 91. All right. Next up, from 2020, a developer called Rocket Ship Park. i've I've heard of this game, but I don't know anything about it. It is a game called...
01:07:51
Speaker
Love a puzzle box filled with stories. Puzzle box. Okay. Got it. Comes right up. So it's very styly, chunky voxel graphics.
01:08:05
Speaker
Yes. um And it looks sweet. Yeah. It's one of those things where I think like the, the people don't necessarily have like distinguished expressions on their faces. Very chunky.
01:08:22
Speaker
Yes. Very, very, very chunky 3d. Like I said, like voxel kind of stuff. And looks like some of the, it looks like they play with that a little It looks like there's some kind of like scribbly 3d artwork too.
01:08:38
Speaker
Um,
01:08:41
Speaker
And, hu I'm very intrigued by this. Because it looks like you're you're playing within, like, a kind of a closed circle situation in a in a building that kind of moves around like a Rubik's Cube.
01:08:56
Speaker
Oh! kind of interested in what the mechanic is, and I'm intrigued by it. Again, don't remember. And there's, like, are you saying...
01:09:10
Speaker
It's a bunch of stories that sort of intersect from this building. I think so. I'm just kind of looking at the mechanic. Oh, yeah. You can see spin around you can spinit around sections of the building.
01:09:22
Speaker
And thus, that's going to put certain things together and certain people together if you spin and change the rooms. That's interesting. Yeah. I do think that's interesting.
01:09:34
Speaker
There's a really annoying song in the trailer. Uh-oh. I'll say that. It's very, very, like, um...
01:09:45
Speaker
Guy in a coffee shop, sort of. With an acoustic guitar sort of song. Uh...
01:09:56
Speaker
wasn't a very popular game. It doesn't look like. No, doesn't look like. But I am intrigued by this idea, of by the mechanic. and It would all come down to, you know, the story and what the what the characters are and where it goes.
01:10:12
Speaker
Yeah, this could be great. It could be terrible. yeah really I think it would really, really depend on the... It could be Love Actually. It could have a bajillion characters with separate love stories and you're like, what?
01:10:26
Speaker
Looks it's short game, too. Looks like it's only about an hour. Okay, I'm going to play it. And so if I'm going to play this, my initial thought to play it. Let's throw real low. Yes. And then you can kick it up high.
01:10:38
Speaker
Kind of. It's to cover our bases. You know, I'm almost tempted to put it in the same area as the House of Seven Stars because we've got – or sorry, Archangel, House of Seven Stars, and ah the one we just did. And the Shine of a Star. Yeah. I think this looks a little better than Shine of of a Star, though.
01:10:55
Speaker
I agree. You know, honestly, I think this deserves to be more in that section of games that don't that look kind of mediocre but have something special about them.
01:11:06
Speaker
But because you are going to play it, that makes me confident in making it our new 91 and knocking Shine Star down to Do it. yeah all right that right Yep. Can't can spend too much time.
01:11:19
Speaker
figure yeah Okay. So this next game. I've made this decision on the spot. It's like, I'm going to play it. Here's what we're going to do. And then we're going to figure it out. out Yep. Exactly. ah All right.
01:11:31
Speaker
This next game. I have played a little bit of. I've not played the whole thing. ah It's by Out of the Blue Games. It's from 2023. It is a game called American Arcadia.
01:11:45
Speaker
And this is a very interesting game. You... Okay. You play a guy in sort of a dystopian future. Sort of actually might be a dystopian past.
01:11:59
Speaker
but And you work at this you work at this company that you... That that people sometimes just start... this This company that rules your whole life and people just start disappearing from.
01:12:11
Speaker
And you get called... Like people get called to the office and then you never see them again. Yeah. You were told they went on vacation, but one of your friends this happened to, and it doesn't make a lot of sense to you. So you start to become suspicious and then you get called up to the office.
01:12:29
Speaker
Yeah. Honestly, it looks really good. Mm-hmm. And so you start – and it's by, you know, published by Raw Fury. Raw Fury, yeah. Who did fucking Catherine and Blue Prince, right? Yeah. Like, they've been on fucking fire. published great things, man. Yeah. No, they are good at determining what is good game to have on your publishing list. also – they published Sable, which was amazing. They published Call of the Sea, which was great. Anyway. Yeah.
01:12:54
Speaker
um No. I like, I like this. okay. So it it works in two parts. Number one, it's like a second person, or sorry, a third person adventure, like side scrolling to two and like 2.5 D platformer, right? One of those ones, like, ah like little nightmares or something. Sure. Yeah. Yeah. But yeah,
01:13:18
Speaker
but You run into obstacles that you can't solve on your own. And so you need to call this woman who is working from within the company, this this creepy this creepy you know um dystopian company, who is trying to help you escape because she she she is she lives outside of it.
01:13:47
Speaker
and she is Against what they're doing. So she, you will switch to first person and solve basically escape room puzzles. um Trying to like avoid detection by security, trying to hack terminals, trying to find passwords, stuff like that.
01:14:07
Speaker
Yeah. Trying to distract somebody, get somebody out of the room. so out of their office. So you can get into their office. Okay. Okay. That sounds like some interesting strategy. i like that. You use that to clear
01:14:25
Speaker
um obstacles. And then you switch back to the guy.
01:14:32
Speaker
Now, the one thing i i think I had some trouble with it is that it has harsh chapter divides. So you might be really digging the way that something's working and then suddenly the chapter's over and it picks up a new chapter.
01:14:44
Speaker
um Yeah, yeah. we We recently talked about that with point and clicks, but that can happen in all sorts of games. yeah um But the voice acting is great. The graphics are awesome.
01:14:56
Speaker
the the The vibe is cool. The story is cool. This is going high, I think. I agree. It's going to go high. i really like this. How high, you though?
01:15:09
Speaker
Well, it's got to go above Orion Burger, right? Well, 100%. I'm just asking the question. Hey, you know what's broken? That we put Orion, we put Pine Hearts below Orion Burger. Why did we do that? I think we even talked about it and made that decision. And now I'm like, why did we do that? because okay Because Orion Burger falls in line way more with Adventure Games and Pine Hearts.
01:15:32
Speaker
That's what I'm going with there. I think this is going to go say, all right, I'm i'm jumping up to the top 20. I think it goes above Dreamfall Chapters. I agree. And I think it goes below Scratches.
01:15:45
Speaker
I think Scratches needs to be above this game. That's my opinion. Yeah, because Scratches is such a triumph in yeah in in what it achieves. But and American Arcadia is also, well, we'll see. I could always i could always go beat it.
01:16:02
Speaker
Does that count? Yeah, that's so that's what he said, Matt.
01:16:09
Speaker
I'm not even going to finish my... Alright, number... um but The next one, 2007. wait, where did it go? the new nineteen It's the new 19. I'm just giving in because I'm not even going to... I'm not even going to ask about that rule.
01:16:26
Speaker
Okay. Because I had a question and now I don't want to know the answer. Number... This next one... Alright, it's a Mistlike No! so From Keop Studio.
01:16:44
Speaker
Who did you know who did ah ah Return to Mysterious Island and one of the Draculas and... They did Safe Cracker, the ultimate puzzle adventure.
01:16:54
Speaker
Anyway, this isn't any of those. Oh my God. They also did Voyage inspired by Jules Verne. It's our second key. Oh my God. Amazing. How is that even possible? okay I don't know. 2007 it's Cleopatra riddle of the tomb.
01:17:11
Speaker
Looks. I don't know. Looks kind of good. Okay. I mean, we did have kind of a thing when we started talking about Myst clones, though. You know what I mean? Yeah, you're right. Myst clones are kind of... Yeah.
01:17:26
Speaker
We get a lot of them. So this game not on Steam. This is an old game that's not been... it's not old. It's 2007. Yeah, 2007 is... Well, 2007 is getting old now. I mean, 2007 is during that period time where it pre-Steam.
01:17:37
Speaker
during that period of time where it was pres steam um but post classic. but So, so like that, those, that is the era, right? 2000 to 2010 is where we don't have a lot, like a lot of games disappeared.
01:17:56
Speaker
um Cleopatra riddle about this of the tomb.
01:18:02
Speaker
Where do we have other missed likes? I think they're near the bottom. Yeah. If I'm honest, I think we've been putting them there because we're so sick of mislikes that we just kind of... Hang on, let me remind myself on what Elena Displaced Reality is.
01:18:23
Speaker
Need to figure that out. Okay, so it looks like where's so it looks like elena displaced reality is slightly mislike it's in that and that's at number that's in the that's in the 80s somewhere where my tab go yeah elena displacement voyage yeah inspired by jules verne i think secret missions matahari and the kaiser submarines yeah maybe was i don't i don't remember no that one is more like No, yeah, that one's a little bit mist-like. Yeah, they these are all kind of first person. Yeah, in that vein, yeah. in that Yeah, and and if we we take it if we take mist as broad as possible.
01:19:07
Speaker
um Do you think this looks better or worse than Voyage? Better. Okay, I do too. I will say this. It does look okay. like it looks It looks pretty good. Yeah. not Maybe not good. Okay, so then I think we have to put it above Suicide of Rachel Foster then.
01:19:24
Speaker
Okay. I'm okay with that. Okay. Do we want to put it up in the mediocre block though? No. Now that it's up there, do we want to put it where like Randall's Monday and Krabat are? No, I think it does need to go below the ah the other game, which is Nancy Drew, Midnight in Salem.
01:19:39
Speaker
Okay. So I do think it needs to go there unless we find a way to play this game. All right. Cleopatra, Riddle of the Tomb is our new 83. Nice.
Reflecting on Rankings
01:19:51
Speaker
All right. I think we're going to do one more because, man, I've been – you know what? I don't even know how they got my number. i'm just I'm just your friend and co-host. I don't know why they have my number, but your entomologist has – Are they bothering you? Oh, my gosh. They've been calling me, and they're like, I – look, I've got a cricket surgery to get to. Yeah.
01:20:14
Speaker
is she gonna be here soon? And I'm like, I don't know. Ask her. Oh shit. I have 50 missed calls from the entomologist. Yeah. He's got a cricket. She's sorry. She's got a cricket surgery to get to.
01:20:27
Speaker
Okay. Yeah. You're um a a cricket with a, with the needs a gastric bypass. So 10, 20 PM. and So let's do it.
01:20:39
Speaker
Let's do it. Let's do it. One more. um This is from, night unless we skip it. This is from 1993 from a studio called Terra Nova. Okay. Oh no. Okay. It's called the labyrinth of time.
01:20:54
Speaker
And man, all I needed to do is look at the screenshots to know this is going low. It's got that headachy, disgusting type of 3D from the 90s.
01:21:08
Speaker
Where it was just like textures everywhere. This would give me headache.
01:21:18
Speaker
it this would give me a headache I do not like this. I do not like this. this is ah This is negative, way negative in the type of games. I'm not even going to look at any reviews. I'm not even going to look at what other people think about this.
01:21:32
Speaker
Okay, fair. Fair enough. I am, yeah. we This is ours. I'm just looking at the screencaps, and I don't like it. I just don't know I don't like it either. It's making me...
01:21:44
Speaker
god i want to put this below the racist games i want to put this like we can't put it below the racist i want to put it below limbo of the lost well we really can't do that come on now um but i want to put it kind of near like this is the same reaction we had to weird was it weird truth is stranger than fiction yes yes Is we looked at we just looked at the screenshots and were like, disgusting. hate I am disgusted by it. Like, I'm not trying to be mean.
01:22:19
Speaker
Making games is hard. but goes above Secret Doctrine and Limbo of the Lost because those are morally bankrupt games. Correct. Yes, correct. I think it goes...
01:22:32
Speaker
I think it goes, our new 117, I think it goes above Weird Truth is Stranger Than Fiction, but below Madness of the Architect. I agree with you. I was looking at Weird Stranger Than Fiction. I'm like, it's going to go there.
01:22:45
Speaker
That's where to go. Yeah, because I'm going to throw up if I play this game.
01:22:52
Speaker
All right. Those are new, those are new, those are our new list. We didn't get a lot of like, you know, really like classics. I feel like sometimes when we're ranking, we got like a we get like a roll of like, oh, yeah, I played that game. I know that game.
01:23:07
Speaker
um We didn't really get that today. We had to really truly know brains here. Yeah. So, I mean, we got some games that a few games were familiar with, like soft porn.
01:23:20
Speaker
Yeah, that's the only one where I can be like, oh yeah, I've played it, I know it, yeah. And an American Arcadia, which I i i played ah some of and enjoyed a lot.
01:23:32
Speaker
Yeah. um
01:23:36
Speaker
But yeah, yeah, other than that, just a lot of strange, a lot of strange games that went, that went pretty low. It was an interesting episode.
Humorous Antics and Wrap-Up
01:23:48
Speaker
Everything was like, Oh, I'm disgusted.
01:23:50
Speaker
Although you are going to play love a puzzle box full of stories. Correct. Yeah. And report back. I'm going to play that one. Cause you know what? I just, I'm, I'm that it sometimes it happens. We just get that intrigued.
01:24:04
Speaker
All right. Well, again, I don't want to hold up your entomology. They're, They're texting me that the ants, but you have a little bit of time, the ants got loose.
01:24:15
Speaker
Oh my god, again? Yeah, so the ants are everywhere, so they've got to, take she's got to take some time to clean up the ants, but again, she's got to get to this cricket surgery, so why don't we say our goodbyes?
01:24:27
Speaker
you know, I keep telling them to fix that ant enclosure, and they never do. yeah Yeah, well, she says it's made out of sugar glass. why I don't know why she's still texting me, clean up your ants, but she says it's made out of sugar glass.
01:24:39
Speaker
The ants are always going to go through it. But she says she likes to lick it on her lunch breaks so she won't replace it with like regular glass. was like, well, the more you lick it, it's going to fall apart even quicker.
01:24:51
Speaker
like these people have never played an adventure game and don't know how to make stuff. You know i mean what mean? Yeah, you can't make an ant enclosure out of sugar glass. this is the 30th time this has happened this year that's even a lie it's the 50th time god i you know what i never saying never thought an entomologist would be a liar but here we are here we are that's just but you so you have a you have a little bit of time you have time to quick tell everybody uh all the things they need to know before we close out the podcast
01:25:26
Speaker
Yeah, so thank you guys so much for listening. If you have questions, rants, raves, ah suggestions, please email us at mattandroses at gmail.com.
01:25:37
Speaker
If you want to interact with us a little bit, you can find us on Instagram. We post fun little thumbnails. Sometimes I'll post an artwork, and that's Save Your Game Podcast on Instagram. And while you're all doing that, you should go follow Matt on his other platforms. He's doing a podcast called Mutant Menace about X-Men's.
01:25:55
Speaker
ah That's really sweet of you. Thank you. Yeah, it's ah it's a fun podcast. um breeding all the With my buddy Pat, we're reading all the issues of X-Men in chronological order.
01:26:07
Speaker
I'm covering them about five at a time. Quite a feat, I must say. ah Do you have anything to tell to tell the people at home, the listeners? Just leave us ratings, ratings reviews, wherever you get it wherever you get the chance to. What?
01:26:23
Speaker
Stop, Matt. um And you can come come back back and hang out with us next week, why don't you? Because next week, we're going to be talking about a ah fun classic game. Do we want to tell them? Yes.
01:26:38
Speaker
Let's tell them. Let's tell them. Ready? One, two, three. We'll do it at the same time. Ready? One, two, three. King's Quest 5. Fucking and Christ. It's Toonstruck. It's Toonstruck. She lies to you. She's been spending too much time with her entomologist.
01:26:54
Speaker
Sorry, my bad. but It's Toonstruck. It's the game Toonstruck with fucking Christopher Lloyd in it. So be back here next week for that.
01:27:06
Speaker
And I guess that leaves us just one thing to say. What? Pray tell. um Well, something I've been thinking about for a while and I'm ready to finally say it to you and to our listeners and to the world. I'm ready.
01:27:25
Speaker
Podcast is art. That's amazing, Matt. Thank you. Thank you. I'm brave. yours How can you say something so brave yet so controversial?
01:27:36
Speaker
i have a follow-up if you are if you you would like to perceive it. uh all right well geez okay trying to steal someone by thunder but that's fine i'll listen i yeah i like to be perceived and okay that is that art is suffer oh actually i agree with that