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Bend It Like Beckham
52 Plays8 days ago
Ready to bend it like Beckham and absolutely fumble it like Joe? ⚽ This week we're revisiting Bend It Like Beckham, where everyone is in love with the wrong person, everyone's keeping at least one secret, and poor Jess just wants to play soccer without causing an international family incident. Tune in as we debate if this wouldv'e been a better movie if Jess and Jules ended up together, why kissing your friends on the mouth is not casual and how Charlie made sure Emma knew every soccer (.....sorry, football....) mistake.
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Transcript
Ice Cream and Snack Nostalgia
00:00:00
Speaker
Such great content. I really do feel. Me talking about my snack proclivities is not content. I think it's excellent content. People need to know how you have grown into appreciating the full variety of the Neapolitan range.
00:00:16
Speaker
Do you remember when we were kids, they had these really like this fancy ice cream and it was called like... Venetian or something. Oh, it was like Villanella.
00:00:28
Speaker
Vionetta. Vionetta. It was Vionetta. Vionetta. But it looks like the fanciest thing you could possibly buy. It was like, that was for rich people. That was for fans. Vionetta. Vionetta ice cream.
00:00:42
Speaker
Oh, and it was, yeah, it looked like a little gelatery and in. Yeah, it was like the top. Like, yeah, I never I never had it in my life. But I just remember the commercials for it made it seem so like decadent.
00:00:55
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. I think it's still a thing in the UK because ah that was Charlie going. Oh, yeah. I love a Viennetta. Oh, yeah.
00:01:07
Speaker
Oh, what a trait. um That's why I remember it is because um it's still a thing in the UK. Oh, they still have it in America. It's still a thing in America too. Really? it is British though. It is British. Oh. It became a global 90s icon of affordable luxury. Of affordable luxury. Similar to the um Milano cookies.
00:01:28
Speaker
ah Yeah, yeah. Milano cookies. I love a mint Milano. Right? You didn't used to be able to get mint Milano outside of Christmas. Yeah. But now you can get it any time. Yeah. i I still feel like they're like a special little like fancy treat. Like you don't just get Milano any day. They're like $6 and you don't get a lot of them. So they are affordable luxury. yeah it's not like a sleeve of Oreos, you know?
00:01:57
Speaker
That's a little bit much. Also, I like anything that like completely tears through from my mouth to shreds. That's my like... Salt and vinegar chips. I love a salt and vinegar chip.
00:02:09
Speaker
ah They're my fave. Salt and vinegar. And then um in the UK, they have Monster Munch. um Pickled onion flavored. ah So good. I do love a pickled onion. love pickled onions, yeah. Yeah, I could sense you were about to judge it. You were about to judge it. do. No, and I love pickled onions. I love um European off-flavor potato chips.
00:02:32
Speaker
Right? Like they've got ketchup in Canada. i don't like ketchup. um In general. i mean or else I haven't been able to have ketchup for years. Because he's afraid of it.
00:02:44
Speaker
Because he's frightened of it. And we can't have it in the house. I can't have it in my mouth. He's frightened of it. It's very funny. I just don't like it. Listen, if I get a burger, a, you know, impossible burger or something yeah like that, and they've act and I'll say I'll order it with no ketchup. But if they put ketchup on it, I wouldn't send it back. It's not that big. yeah No, but for it's the end of the world.
00:03:10
Speaker
He cannot even sense it himself. He has to have me check it because he cannot put that in his mouth.
Household Dynamics and Aversion to Ketchup
00:03:17
Speaker
Well, he could even like could he open it and look?
00:03:21
Speaker
He doesn't like to. Oh, wow. Wow. That seems that is that's pathological, man. That's like there's something we need to dig into that. You need to talk to a therapist about that. This is why Charlie used to go to therapy. I get to the the core of his fear of ketchup.
00:03:38
Speaker
ah Men would rather not ketchup than go to therapy, I guess. I guess. Because like the whole thing is that like if it's on a table and we're at a restaurant, he'll make me move it off the table to a different table. Really? Even if it's on a neighboring table.
Moving Challenges and Sentimental Media
00:03:54
Speaker
So it's not even just like the smell or anything. He doesn't even want to look at it.
00:03:58
Speaker
How does he feel about HP sauce? Oh, he loves it. HP sauce is like 75% ketchup. Yeah, don't ask him that. And i've I've tricked him into eating things with ketchup in it, and I refuse to tell him what it was. Okay. So it's like ah ah Michael McKeon's character on Better Call Saul, basically? Like, it's all psychosomatic?
00:04:19
Speaker
Pretty much. ah If he doesn't know it's there, and now he's going to question everything because he can hear everything because our new house resonates so much. He's going question everything I make for him. Like, does that have ketchup in it? Does have ketchup in it?
00:04:31
Speaker
i like I like the curved arch and the sconce behind you. It looks like my apartment. Yeah, right? My apartment has those exact same things, yeah. Right? It's really nice. And then we put little LIFX lights in our little um fireplace that that doesn't work. um The little sconces over them.
00:04:47
Speaker
So we can have little fake candles in there. nice. The house is great. Emma just moved, to friends. um And moving sucks. And I have too much crap. It's worst thing we all do intentionally, Yeah. yeah I refuse to get rid of any of my crap, but I do not refuse to complain about how much crap I have.
Blade Movies Debate
00:05:06
Speaker
It's too much. There's too much. Yeah. I remember we hired movers ah one time and like the the movers came in and like, you a professor or something? I'm like, no. You've got a lot of books. I'm like, yeah, I know. I'm sorry.
00:05:25
Speaker
Yeah, and I got books I got to get rid of, but like I keep them so that I can make a pretty rainbow in my bookcase.
00:05:34
Speaker
Yeah, and that's reasonable. Yeah. That's reasonable. I now have a storage unit that's full of books and physical media like movies. Like almost all of it There's like a couple of boxes of clothes, but almost the entire storage unit is full of boxes full of books and and movies. mostly ah I'll tell you what, though.
00:05:54
Speaker
Keep those DVDs, guys. Keep those DVDs. Yeah. They're taking it from you. Yeah. Because you're going to move and not have internet for like three days. Yeah. And what are you going to want to do?
00:06:05
Speaker
You're going to want to watch stuff with your loving husband. Or All Alone Forever, like me. Or All Alone to get Forever, like
Film Industry Insights: David S. Goyer and Keira Knightley
00:06:13
Speaker
Katie. No, not All Alone Forever, Katie.
00:06:16
Speaker
i almost got you to say it. Almost. um we I almost texted you, but then I was just like, I'm not going to burn gas. um i We watched Blade 2 and 3. One of those movies is great.
00:06:31
Speaker
One of them is... One of the worst things I've ever seen. I don't think that your preferences and my preferences are going to align on this, Katie. We've had this conversation before. Like, you like Blade 3, and I don't know why.
00:06:44
Speaker
I love Blade 3. We rewatched it, and I was just like, yep, still my favorite Blade. That's insane. That's an insane opinion. ah Didn't realize at the end of ah the most biggest shock of Blade 2 was when the credits started rolling, and it goes directed by Guillermo del Toro.
00:07:01
Speaker
Yeah, he directed Blade 2. He did not direct the first one. No, no, he just directed Blade 2. He just directed Blade 2. You can tell because it's great. It's fine. Blade 2 rules. No, it's fine. Blade 2's very good. Blade 2's really good.
00:07:14
Speaker
They couldn't keep me for a lot of it, and they tried. I was just like, eh. Okay, these are zombie vampires. Whatever. yeah But it looks cool. I have not seen Blade 2 in a long time, actually. um I remember, I think it was before the pandemic, Caitlin and I watched all three of them, and we had never seen Blade 3, or Blade Trinity, as they call Yeah, yeah. And it's just a shocking drop of quality. Like, it is, don't know.
00:07:41
Speaker
It's the Jurassic... Do you remember the old Jurassic Park meme where they show, like, the majesty of the dinosaur, then they hard cut to, like, some shitty CG? It's like...
00:07:53
Speaker
I don't know. I mean, you get the the the greatness that is ryan Reynolds. You get the greatness that is Parker Posey. We all love looking at Ryan Reynolds circa 2005 with his shirt off. Nobody's denying that. But you can get that almost anywhere.
00:08:07
Speaker
you get You get Blade being real upset that Ryan Reynolds is so cheeky, and which is just great. just You get Natasha Lyonne. You get freaking a vampire dog.
00:08:21
Speaker
A vampire dog. A vampire powering. You get freaking Dracula. Blade Trinity has it all. You might be the only person in the world who prefers the third
Bend It Like Beckham: Cultural Impact and Anecdotes
00:08:33
Speaker
Blade movie to the other two.
00:08:34
Speaker
i don't understand people. I just want to see. I just want to check the letterbox average on Blade 3 real quick. Oh, Charlie opened it up. Opened up the um ah Rotten Tomatoes or some rating. He goes, Emma, this has a ah Rotten Tomatoes score of like 12%. I gave it one star and all the people I follow also, I mean, looks like somebody gave it three stars, which is insane. but I mean, that's what I would give it.
00:09:00
Speaker
Three or four. It's great. what is let's Let's do Katie's letterbox corner. katie's letterbox corner idiotic and nonsensical and so boring at the same time the combined hotness of snipes beal posey reynolds and christopherson is almost enough to make this worth watching but god it's not it's not it's not it's unwatchable trash no it's an entertainment and laugh romp I forgot um ah Parker Posey was in it. Yeah. Love Parker Posey.
00:09:34
Speaker
Parker Posey is in it and she's great. And ah she's got vampire. Dominic Purcell plays Dracula. Yeah. It's great. The cast is fucking stacked. Dominic Purcell.
00:09:46
Speaker
ah The guy from Prison Break. Yeah. The guy from Prison Break. And he's real scary. That's crazy. That's crazy. Patton Oswalt. Yeah. This is crazy.
00:09:57
Speaker
2004. Directed by David S. Goyer. Who's that? David S. Goyer is... No, he did not. David S. Goyer is a writer who... He's a voice actor turned writer who wrote a bunch of... Writes like everything, but most of it's trash. like He's written some good movies. What has he written recently? Trinity.
00:10:22
Speaker
No, that's not recent. That was 22 years ago. Oh, here we go. Films as writer. Yeah, he's he wrote Dark City and Jumper and all three Blade movies.
00:10:35
Speaker
But he also wrote Man of Steel and Batman versus Superman. Dawn of Justice. Yeah. It's a lot of comic book stuff. um He wrote Batman Begins. He wrote Batman something else. He's yeah, he's written a bunch of comic book stuff.
00:10:50
Speaker
He's a nerd. Yeah, no, I'm confusing him with a different person. confusing him with David Kemp. Sorry, David Kemp the one who wrote Jurassic Park and Spider-Man and Mission Impossible. Ah, gotcha, gotcha. No, Roland cannot eat my breakfast.
00:11:04
Speaker
um The benefit of doing it at a kitchen table now. um Oh, right, yeah. Blade Trinity, famously featured in today's film. Yeah.
00:11:15
Speaker
because I realized we're 11 minutes in it we haven't even touched the subject of... It happens sometimes. Soccer. Or sorry, football. um That's right, guys. ah This is Go Get Your Girl. This is the podcast where Emma and Katie both just want to play soccer. They just want to be...
00:11:36
Speaker
girls playing soccer in the US like Mia Hamm or like David Beckham but their both of their families don't like them playing soccer one because of cultural reasons and that's sort of the main story and the other one because her mom's afraid she's a lesbian her mom's just ah a heinous bitch just a heinous bitch but her dad really loves it and that's all that matters um yeah that's right guys you guessed it I'm Emma And I'm Katie. And today we are talking about the 2002, not rom-com, just not in any real way, a rom-com.
00:12:14
Speaker
um Bend It Like Beckham. um It is directed by Gurinder Chadha and it is written by her along with Paul Mayetta Burgess and Guljit Bindra.
00:12:30
Speaker
And I hope I'm pronouncing those names correctly. um Probably not. Gurinder Chadha directed Angus Thongs and Full Frontal Snogging. Which, I've never seen the movie, but I read those books as a kid, like a lot. I've never seen the movie, but um dedicated listeners to the pod will know that that book has a sore spot in my heart because it created a lot of drama at girls camp for Emma. Oh, that's right. It was the porn book.
00:12:56
Speaker
That's right, because it yeah had the word thong and full frontal in it. Yeah, yeah. Which the movie they changed to perfect snogging, which is not the same. That does not seem good. She also directed Bride and Prejudice and What's Cooking, um which are also like, you know, movies that did well, I guess. yeah i remember I remember watching Bride and Prejudice and liking it.
00:13:20
Speaker
Yeah, Bride and Prejudice was like very early on in the we're going to remake Pride and Prejudice endlessly kind of thing. Yeah, yeah exactly. um And ah Paul Mayetta Burgess is married to her and has co-writing credits on all those movies as long along with her. um And Guljit Bindra does not have any other credits aside from this. And I don't know who that person is. so Well, there you go.
00:13:44
Speaker
That explains why one of the production teams was Bendit Productions. Oh, yeah, yeah, for sure. um ah This is ah also we should say um before we start this, I guess this is a this a fun fact.
00:13:55
Speaker
But Keira Knightley was 16 slash 17 when making this movie. Yeah, she was a whole 10 years younger than the main character. That was the other. Yeah. Parmenda Nagra is 27 when she shot this movie. Yeah.
00:14:07
Speaker
Absolutely insane. Absolutely insane. Which is um Also the fact that Keira Knightley, she's been working forever and she's looked the exact same.
00:14:18
Speaker
She's Louise. Yeah, she's, um I mean, this was this was her first movie, I think, right? Did she have any credits before this? Was she on EastEnders or something? No, I feel like this was her like big break and then she got um Love Actually shortly after this.
00:14:36
Speaker
And then Pirates. let actually and and and And Pirates came out before Love Actually because Love Actually came out at Christmas. yeah Oh, okay. So Pirates and then Love Actually. And then it was the year of Keira Knightley. And everyone knew her. Oh, her parents both have links on Wikipedia. That makes sense.
00:14:50
Speaker
Yeah. I think they're in like casting or something. um Her father's an actor. And her mother. Oh, her mother's a playwright. Oh, I love that. And and actress. Yeah. I mean, they're not like famous though.
00:15:06
Speaker
They birthed Keira Knightley. Mostly in and thing in TV shows that and movies no one's ever heard of. you Yeah. It should be said for the pod that um Charlie was so excited we were doing this movie. he loves this movie.
00:15:20
Speaker
um This brings me to- unsurprising. Charlie's corner, Charlie's corner, Charlie's corner. governor. um This is not even close to her first credit. um she Seriously?
00:15:32
Speaker
She was in Star Wars, The Phantom Menace. Oh, yeah. She was Natalie Portman's- Yes. She was one of the lookalikes. Yeah. She was the role of Sabe, her handmaiden and decoy. And then she was also in an Oliver Twist adaptation for ITV.
00:15:51
Speaker
She was in, yeah, she's got several roles before this. Oh, all right. And she's like, yeah, though she's she's got child actor. which She was in A Village Affair in 1995 when she was nine years old. A Village Affair. a Village Affair.
00:16:04
Speaker
um Well, good you, Keira Knightley. Anyways, so Charles, back to my my British husband. Charlie. No, that's okay. I interrupted her IMDb.
00:16:18
Speaker
ah And so Charlie was very excited about this. um He's a little disappointed that we didn't time it with the World Cup, because by the time this comes out, the World Cup will be over. um To which he's been very happy because those that have been following...
00:16:34
Speaker
England's been getting pretty far. Knock on wood. Semifinals are today. They are playing. Well,
00:16:41
Speaker
when it's over for England. I'm sorry. We don't know that. And um I mean, I also have to brace myself to with some tissues, maybe some pints of Ben and Jerry's to.
00:16:55
Speaker
You know, just. Console my husband when I. Don't watch the match. um it's There's going be lots of screaming. There's been lots of screaming um just repeatedly and just at random points. He'll have it on mute and then we'll be watching something i go wo ah and Or I'll be in the other room and he'll be like screaming.
00:17:16
Speaker
The other day, like I was unpacking and he was watching the England match and there was just like, i it reverberated throughout the house. He just was...
00:17:27
Speaker
very stressed. um Yeah. So Charlie loves soccer. ah um Yeah. As do most people in the world. Yeah. um But Charlie's corner is the fact that this entire movie
00:17:46
Speaker
He kept correcting the soccer or sorry, the football taking place on screen and explaining it to me and describing the history of why there was no women's soccer at this time in the UK and why that was problematic and how there was in the US. s and It's crazy. I did. I looked it up. Yeah. Yeah.
00:18:08
Speaker
There's like a whole, he he gave me a whole little history on women's soccer. As we were watching this movie, uh, some of it was very beneficial and will be repeated on this podcast. And some of it, um, was just the fact that they were playing it wrong.
00:18:24
Speaker
And, uh, I didn't care to know about soccer wrong. He said that wouldn't have happened. That wouldn't have happened. They wouldn't have done that. She would have been the final kick. They were, Carrie Knightley was a much better kicker. du i just,
00:18:40
Speaker
okay okay buddy there's the whole thing um Keira Knightley is too Keira Knightley is a wisp of a person who like does not look like she belongs on a soccer field I'm sorry she does not she does not she's too tiny teeny tiny and she wears the teeny tiniest of clothes in this um but anyways continue on with the bibliography i just need the listeners to know that this i had a second dialogue happening in my ear the entire time watching this of the corrections of soccer sorry yeah couldn't possibly care yeah um is it what why are you saying it like that they're not like they're not latin
00:19:21
Speaker
You're pronouncing it like Spanish. I'm saying it as a very European person. but oh okay. As opposed to footy. but Football.
00:19:32
Speaker
It's football, isn't it? as As they say in France. fo Le foot. Le foot. Not le pied, which would be French for a foot, but le foot. Le foot.
00:19:43
Speaker
Football. Like weekend. Yeah. weekend football um anyway yes um made it like beckham 2002 what a time what a time be in england in 2002 yeah um post 9-11 which the final scene wouldn't lead you to believe that it was post 9-11 Well, it was also England. So I don't know. Maybe it took them longer.
00:20:09
Speaker
It took them longer to like adapt. Also, they might have shot this before 9-11 because I'm not sure when it came out, but it came out in like summer of 2002, I think. So I bet they did shoot it before 9-11. Yeah. yeah Yeah. Oh yeah. It was probably shot before because they were like all up at the gate at the airport. And I was like, that would not happen after 9-11. Um, uh, anyway, so this starts with a daydream of what I imagine are real soccer announcer people. Talking about how um ah Jess has ah been put on Manchester United, it seems. Yep. um And playing with David Beckham.
00:20:46
Speaker
Yeah. um And they're all talking about how a great a soccer player she is. And she's having a daydream. And we see her family, who are ah Punjabi Sikhs. um They're not Hindu. They're Sikhs.
00:20:59
Speaker
um And we learn that her sister, Archie Punjabi, ah who we love ah from The Good Wife, where went to law school. Didn't she?
00:21:10
Speaker
She got an Emmy for The Good Wife, didn't she? I believe so, yes. she's She's great on The Good Wife. However, at some point, she and Juliana Margulies had some kind of horrible falling out to where they refused to film together. oh no. They were like, and their characters are best friends on the show, and theyre theyre the actors were real life best friends for a while, and then nobody knows, but something happened.
00:21:31
Speaker
And they, for the like the last, I think Oji Punjabi leaves before the last season of The Good Wife. I think that's what happens. But in the last like two seasons, like they don't have any scenes together. And there's a scene where she leaves or maybe she comes back and they they literally like cut them digitally together because they wouldn't be on set together.
00:21:52
Speaker
um ah And nobody knows what happened. And I'm not sure. I don't know whose fault it is, but it's somebody's. Yeah, it's somebody's fault. So, um, so yeah, behind the scenes drama of The Good Wife.
00:22:04
Speaker
ah There you go. But ah yeah, she's a great character on The Good Wife. She is the like investigator for the law firm who like, you know, breaks into cars and follows people around. And that's her deal. Yeah. Yeah.
00:22:16
Speaker
But not in this movie. But not in this movie. In this movie, she plays Pinky, who is her older sister, which I assume, again, is is a, you know, diminutive of of some Punjabi name that they never say.
00:22:28
Speaker
Because her name is Jess Mender. And they call her Jess for short, an anglicized nickname. um But I don't know what pinky is short for. it Yeah. And then we cut to Kira's mom who's trying to get her to buy an inflatable bra. Yep.
00:22:42
Speaker
Which used to exist. oh my God. but Why? like that's such a pain in the ass. Like, and she literally goes, and here's the gel one. This is a little bit easier because you don't have to pump it up. it was like, yeah, yeah if you're good, you like, just get some chicken cutlets. My God.
00:22:57
Speaker
the The idea is that like, you can have, you can pump them up if you want, or you can leave them non-pumped up. And like it, so you can like customize how much like fake boobage you have.
00:23:07
Speaker
Yeah, because that's what I want. and Yeah. ah ah A non-inflated piece of plastic inside my bra at all times. Right, right. I don't like big... You can wear a normal bra or you can wear a push-up bra. Like, you still have that same choice. Yeah, just just just pick one or the other.
00:23:24
Speaker
Just pick one or other. I mean, I guess the idea, the real thing there would be, like, you can wear it uninflated like, school. And then when you go out that night, you can just inflate it. can just go boop, boop, boop, boop.
00:23:36
Speaker
Without taking it off, you could inflate it, I suppose. yeah But then, like, if that's the case, then their their target audience is um very disturbing.
00:23:48
Speaker
It's teenagers, yeah, which is what Keira Knightley is. And her mom seems to work, I believe it's a department store, but we just to only see the lingerie department. We only see the lingerie store, yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:23:59
Speaker
um ah So yes, we we get to see their family. um Her mother is, ah you know, just disturbed by kira Knightley's tomboyishness. Yes, she cannot handle it.
00:24:13
Speaker
Yes. um She plays soccer with boys. Oh, yeah. So Jess plays soccer with boys in the park with her friend Tony and the boys who are horrible. Like just the most, like the biggest chav pieces of trash playing football in the park.
00:24:29
Speaker
And just like the most like misogynistic, just yeah garbage people. yeah um Everyone except for her BFFs. Yeah. It's trash. I wonder if there's a reason why he's not a piece of trash. Yeah. We'll find out later. you're a Kira, whose name is Jules. Her names are Jules and Jess. um ah Jules sees her playing soccer and it's love at first sight. Yeah. um Yeah. It's, I mean, she's in love with her moves. She's in love with her, with her technique.
00:24:57
Speaker
She's in love with a lot of things about Jess. um Some might also say in love with her bod, in love with her face. It's hard to say. Yeah. It's hard to say homoerotic because i don't think this movie is erotic in any way. um These are, I think they're supposed to be, i mean, I think it's the summer after they graduated high school. Yeah.
00:25:17
Speaker
Um, ah so I think that they are supposed to be like technically adults, but like, come on. They're like 17. A-levels in the middle. Yeah, yeah. They're like 17, 18. Um, cause Charlie said that that there's even more disturbing like age differences when we get to meeting Joe. jonathan reese myyers is twenty five Yeah, yeah. And, and, I mean, I mean, and, you know, Parmender, uh, is, is 27. So that's not an issue, but like,
00:25:43
Speaker
But she's portraying 17. Yeah, but Keira Knightley also has like, you know, I don't think they have, they don't actually have any like scenes. Like she doesn't kiss him or anything. They dance together. Yeah. Yeah.
00:25:53
Speaker
And he's like not into it. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause she's 16. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, because she's 16. Well, like, they're, and they're all supposed to be, like, 17 slash 18, and he's, like, this 25-year-old dude um who's who's just, like, straight up an adult.
00:26:11
Speaker
Yeah. And it's just, like, it's weird and gross. And and that's never brought up. It's never mentioned. never It's never mentioned. I mean, I know at least in Jess's culture, that's probably not as big an issue. Like, yeah in terms of of the way that culture, like, use it that does their marriages. Like, that kind of age difference I don't think would be a big deal.
00:26:31
Speaker
Yeah. Just based on other movies and things I've seen. But, like... Just in general. Yeah, in general, that's a big age gap, yeah. um i And I would say yeah a part of me had this thought of like, did they, is there maybe a cut of this movie?
00:26:50
Speaker
Maybe a version of this movie that they had written where they decided that Jess and um Jules like do fall in love. Because it's so hinted at throughout the movie and alluded to. And there's like so many calls, call outs to it. And I'm just like,
00:27:09
Speaker
What if they just like went that extra mile and they just fell apart? The director says that never happened. There were rumors that the original script was like a lesbian rom-com. The director says that that's not, that that that never happened. That's not true.
00:27:22
Speaker
um I think they just have chemistry. And also they like kiss each other on the mouth a lot. Like, listen, far away from me to like discourage platonic kissing on the mouth. I have platonic kissed almost all of my friends on the mouth before. Yes.
00:27:37
Speaker
But usually like we're drunk. You know what mean? Yeah. Yeah. It's not like a, okay, see you later. Sounds good. Yeah. Or
Cultural Identity and Personal Reflections
00:27:44
Speaker
like i have like on the cheek, I've definitely kissed friends on the cheek. Like, like in a hug. like Like, yeah, for sure. A hundred percent. And especially like in England, you kiss people on the cheek all the time.
00:27:54
Speaker
yeah Sure. Yeah, it's different. Yeah. And it's probably different in seat culture as well. But like they kiss each other oh on the mouth because they're excited a couple of times, which is like, I don't know, man. Like, I don't don't think I've ever done that. I mean, I've never won a soccer game. So maybe you do that. Maybe you kiss each other on the mouth. Yeah. Maybe we got to play soccer to find out if that's like a thing. But like, I just, you I feel. We have to play soccer and win, which I think at this point is probably beyond us.
00:28:23
Speaker
You and i would just be both sitting in the outfield. Is there an outfield? I don't know. We'd both be sitting with our legs broken.
00:28:31
Speaker
Like, I don't want to do this. Yeah. Don't make me. Don't make me play soccer. Like any sort of family event where they're like, we're going to play tag or we're going to play. We're going to play touch football. I'm like, absolutely not.
00:28:47
Speaker
No, you. No, no, no, no, no. no I'm going to go in the kitchen like a stereotype. Yeah. and Talk about movies. Yeah. I don't know. It's like, yeah, I would always be like out like, like looking at my nails or like looking at at a bird or something and like the ball would like. o Yeah. oh And if you just don't try, they will stop throwing it to you.
00:29:12
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. For sure. Yeah. They'll stop asking you to play. Yeah. Exactly. Exactly. Like my short winded softball career. Yes. um ah yes ah So to bend it um like Beckham or like anyone else.
00:29:29
Speaker
To bend it. Means, I looked this up. It means that you're putting spin on the ball, meaning that the ball moves while it's in the air. So for example, you could kick it looking like you're kicking it straight at the the goalie, but the ball is going to move because you put spin on it when you kicked it, which is something that David Beckham was very famous for.
00:29:52
Speaker
He was a good soccer player from what I understand. He was. He was, I mean, a pretty famous soccer player. I have been told by my husband, Emma, please do not get into the drama with Bex and Beckham and Brooklyn.
00:30:10
Speaker
Please don't talk about that on the pod. Nobody wants to hear it. Oh, their daughter? Their Son, whatever. I don't know. Who they've disowned. They disowned their son?
00:30:21
Speaker
Pretty much because they don't like his wife. Well, who's his wife? um I don't know. Listen, I don't care about celebrities, Emma. This is one of the big differences between us. Like, my friend Luke also...
00:30:35
Speaker
It's like, again, another another one of my friends who like watches every movie like me, but he wants to talk about like celebrities lives and stuff. And I just couldn't possibly care. Like, yeah I just like, there's just like some drama because like, he didn't go to like David's like 50th birthday.
00:30:50
Speaker
And he that's actually crazy. Not going to your dad's 50th birthday is a big deal. Yeah. Because they don't like his wife. And because there was like all of this like drama apparently that like Victoria Beckham made like his wedding about her.
00:31:04
Speaker
and didn't they get divorced? No, they're still married. Oh, Brooklyn Beckham. it is yeah we're doing the opposite of what charlie told me to do the son of former footballer david beckham he is a british model photographer chef and brand owner no he doesn't have a job he's a nepo baby who lives off a trust fund is what that is of course he's married to nicola pelts yep and they got married in 2022 it was a beautiful wedding
00:31:38
Speaker
She looked gorgeous. Her deal. She's known for her role as Katara in the M. Night Shyamalan disaster last airbender movie. Yep.
00:31:50
Speaker
ye Yep. Yep. um ah Yeah. Oh, she's American. who She's an actress and model. and And it doesn't say like why she's a bad person or anything. She's, she's not a bad person.
00:32:04
Speaker
Victoria Beckham just doesn't like her. She's a vegetarian. Is it because she's Jewish? No, she just doesn't like it. It's just one of those things of like, it's her, her son, her son got married. And one of those things of like, moms who love their sons, you know? Yeah. She's the daughter of a billionaire. Yep.
00:32:23
Speaker
Yep. She has one sister, one brother, including Will Peltz. Will Peltz is a matt also an actor. Nelson Peltz is their father. who is a businessman and investor. That's a for sketchy. I mean, yeah, he's he's a oh he's a big Trump supporter. Oh, I bet she's a Trump supporter. I bet that's what it is.
00:32:46
Speaker
Oh, well, then i feel I don't feel sorry for Brooklyn and Nicola. Well, I never would. Not in any way. there was just The daughter of the billionaire and David Beckham are unhappy because they're parents. Who gives a fuck?
00:33:02
Speaker
They have to get real job? No, they don't. They don't have to get a real job. Never ever. they just don't have to hang out with Victoria Beckham. Sounds like a win to me.
00:33:15
Speaker
um Everyone we talked about is a fucking horrible person. Like, I don't care about any of it. Yeah, it does not matter. it does not matter. um It's mostly we're bringing it up because Charlie told me not to. ah Allegedly. Allegedly, they're terrible people. Allegedly, they're terrible people. We'll do that for you, Charles.
00:33:35
Speaker
um Back to this film. ah So Knightley is checking out Jess Minder's moves on the ah on the park pitch. oh this was ah one of the moments that Charlie was just like, um oh, you see what they're doing there? It's um jumpers for goal posts jumpers for goalposts, for goalposts.
00:33:58
Speaker
It's where you take your jumper off and that's your goalposts. That's the type of commentary I had while watching this film. Oh, sweater. The sweaters. Yeah. Sweaters. I like to pretend that you were doing a bit. I was doing bit. Jumpers for goalposts. Sweaters for goalposts.
00:34:18
Speaker
Because it's always cold in England. And ah she's she's checking out her moves and she's just like, hey. I see you got some moves. Where do you play? She goes, the park. And she's like, never thought about joining a ah girls team?
00:34:32
Speaker
You know, it it'll be, it'll be real fun. Yeah. So it's just like, I got confused. Yeah, me too. So this is an independent team. It's like a Parks and Rec team, I guess. But it's like, I guess what in America, they call them traveling teams for youth, which was like an independent kind of like, it wasn't professional because you weren't getting paid, but it wasn't your school team. And it wasn't like a Parks and Rec team. It was like an independence team. I tried asking Charlie, I was like, is it like an intramural team? And he was like, what does that mean? And I was like, uh, like, it's not professional.
00:35:04
Speaker
Well, no, intramural is like in college, which is like the intramural teams are the non-school like official teams. Like those are the teams you play for fun and in college instead of playing for the school. Yeah. Yeah. But like essentially that's what – And it's like inside – like there's multiple teams inside the school who all play each other. That's what intramural means. yeah Oh, yeah. So you're not playing other schools. You're only playing inside. that if you take it outside the school. Yeah.
00:35:30
Speaker
Yeah, I think in America they have, in America youth sports, they're called traveling soccer teams. Traveling teams. Sorry. I don't know that much about soccer. had a lot of friends who played soccer.
00:35:42
Speaker
That tracks. I just know you bring orange slices. Was that a homophobic comment, Emma? No, that wasn't a homophobic comment, Katie. That was a comment of, um you seem like the type of person that would be friends with the popular kids that would play soccer. Yeah.
00:36:01
Speaker
Um, yeah, i'm I know, I'm just messing with you. um And now I have to put that in my canon of things not to say to anyone of the LGBTQIA plus community. but In your canon of, don't, don't call them LGBTQIA plus also.
00:36:18
Speaker
Make that part of it. Um, so yeah, then we meet Joe, who is a pre-premessant Jonathan Marie Spires. Oh my God. He got so, like, when did he get ripped? Yeah.
00:36:30
Speaker
um I think it was not but this. Yeah. thing Like that first scene, I was like, oh, like he looks like a baby. And then like two scenes later, I'm like, oh, he's still fucking hot as shit. Yeah.
00:36:41
Speaker
I mean, it's just that first scene. I don't know. Muscle that he has now, but like. I'll do it. I'll do it. I'll volunteer his tribute. He's not doing an English accent in this, which we love to hear. yeah um a lot of movies he does english does an English accent. yeah Oh, and this also brings me to a point of like, there's one point later in the movie where Jess Minder um gets really upset because one of the opposing teams like had like shh. grabbed her and then um she got really upset and ah she like went to like, you know, rebuke. And then the opposing team member called her Paki and she got like really, really upset. And she's having this like moment of, um,
00:37:26
Speaker
Well, she gets a red card. Yeah, she gets a red card. And so Jonathan Rhys-Myers like yells at her and she's just like, why are you yelling me? And she's like, you don't understand. She called me a packie. And then he goes, I'm Irish. I get it. To which I turned to Charlie and I was just like, i don't feel like that's the same. And Charlie was just like, same he was like, actually, Emma, actually in England, it is.
00:37:49
Speaker
Kind of the same because i hope they got very discriminated against too. It's not exactly the same Maybe his dad did or his grandparents, but I don't know if he did.
00:38:02
Speaker
i don't know if that's quite the same as being Indian in in England. Yeah. Cause immediately I'm going, Oh, this white man is telling this woman of color that her experience is not unique. Yeah.
00:38:16
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. Listen, I know the Irish are very disturbing. Maybe if he was Northern Irish, maybe if he was a Catholic in Northern Ireland, that be the same. mean, not from England, and Charlie said was really bad. Apparently, it's not the same, but it's- I guess there was still the You're right. Yeah, the 90s, there was like a big thing. I imagine it was probably discriminated. A lot of Irish people were discriminated against in England and Ireland because of all the troubles. Yeah.
00:38:44
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. And so like, he's just like, it's not exactly the same, but like you could get away with making with those lines in this movie at this time.
00:38:55
Speaker
And I was just like, i don't know.
00:39:03
Speaker
um ah The English are so racist, they're racist against other white people. that's They're so racist, they're racist against other white people. Like the Irish and the French. Like H.P. Lovecraft was so racist. He was like racist against Italians and stuff. How can you be racist against Italians?
00:39:22
Speaker
They gave you pasta. yeah True. Well, I mean, there's the whole like Sacco and Vanzetti thing. There's a lot of racism against Italians, actually, especially in America in the first part of the 20s. I mean, i should know. i I should know. Famously Italian, Emma Palizza, yeah. Famously Italian, Emma Palizza, who lives in a very Italian town now.
00:39:40
Speaker
where there's little Lucas running around everywhere. and a little Lucas.
00:39:48
Speaker
um But ah my family wasn't allowed into the, this great United States the first time around because they were like, no Italians please. And so they were like, yes, got to go to Canada.
00:39:59
Speaker
So we were forced to go to Canada and that's why I have French Canadian in my blood. That's my culture. And my family's Irish, so it was really the same thing. Yeah. You and me and Parmender Nagra, all the same. All the same.
00:40:12
Speaker
All the same. We get it. Yes. she meets him. He watches her try out, and he's like, yeah, join this team that's semi-professional for young women, and we go to Germany and play, but get paid. don't get paid.
00:40:29
Speaker
Kind of, it's hard to explain or understand. And this is what started looking up, like the history of women's soccer. So yeah, the the Women's um United Soccer Association, I think is what it's called, was the first, globally, the first women's professional soccer league in the world. Yeah.
00:40:45
Speaker
And it was founded in 2000. The British women's professional soccer team, which is called like Super Women or something lame like that. Super women soccer. Super women, innit? Super.
00:41:00
Speaker
Super, innit? Um... It was founded in 2010. took... yeah Like seven years after this movie or eight years after this movie came out. yeah Yeah. Yeah. The women's soccer team that exists, the women's professional soccer league that existed when this movie came out was fell apart the same year this movie came out, but, but what but was immediately replaced by a successor.
00:41:26
Speaker
And then this, that one also fell apart. And the successor of that one is the one that's still playing today. Okay, that's good. But I believe it's been continuous pretty much. I thought you were going to just continue to tell me like that one fell apart and then the next one fell apart. And I was like, why can we not just let women play soccer?
00:41:43
Speaker
Have you ever met? The is they got to pay for it. You ever met 12 year old girl? you ever met a 12 year old girl? you know what they love? Soccer. yeah They freaking love it.
00:41:56
Speaker
Soccer is fun. Yeah. Yeah. You're around all the time. There's no downtime in soccer, which I appreciate. There's no time for me to stand around and look at a bird and the ball fall near me. Like you have to keep going in soccer, which is why soccer will never be like ah big in America. Like there's no breaks for commercials. Exactly. Which is why it's, it's been, they've had to put hydration breaks in for the World Cup.
00:42:18
Speaker
Yeah. We got to pay for it. yes. Keira Knightley's mother is like, why are you such a lesbian? And Keira Knightley is like, stop it. She's like, um ah there's a reason why Spot We Spice is the only one without a fella.
00:42:35
Speaker
Yes! They're in Hounslow, which I can't do a Hounslow accent. And I don't think any of them are trying one either. they're just generic British. Well, they're kind of all over the place. Yeah. Yeah.
00:42:49
Speaker
Yeah. Keira Knightley's always like, I look quite pretty. um I look quite pretty. Like,
00:43:00
Speaker
She does say things like very nicely for someone whose mom and dad sound like, oh, you're doing all right there, Jules. Hey, we're going play some football, right? Why won't you let, if my daughter wants to play football instead of running around with a fella, well, I'll be over the moon about that.
00:43:21
Speaker
yeah. yeah yeah and She's like, hello, Keira Knightley. Can you pass the water, please? These are the most English accents we've ever done on this. I can't wait for Charlie's family to hear it.
00:43:37
Speaker
Same. And all of my friends over in the UK who listen to this um religiously, I shall say. Good. Good. So um Jess is uncomfortable changing in front of the other girls because she has these burn scars on her thigh, which the actress really has. Oh, really? i didn't know that. Yeah. It was it was written into the script.
00:43:58
Speaker
Yeah. um um ah And the story that she tells is is real too. Like she pulled beans on toast down onto her leg when she was like a little kid trying to make it on her own. Yeah. Um, ah and like John, Jonathan Reese Myers shows her his like knee scar where, where he can't, why he can't play professional football is yeah he injured his knee and now he's stuck coaching the girl's side as they call Yeah.
00:44:21
Speaker
Yeah. And he's like, and he constantly brings up his dad and how his dad like bullied him into being like a great soccer player so much so that he like played injured, which is why he had to have multiple knee surgeries and why he can't play soccer anymore. Yeah.
00:44:34
Speaker
Yeah. This is going drive Charlie crazy that we're calling it soccer this entire time. Oh, I'm definitely going to call it soccer the entire time. Well, soccer is a British term. um ah The reason, ah fun Katie's fun fact i katty's but in fact. Katie's fun fact. fun fact.
00:44:49
Speaker
So the reason it's called soccer is because it is called association football. um So if you've ever seen the what FIFA stands for and thought that that was um ah redundant, because FIFA stands for Fédération Internationale Football associate Association. song Football!
00:45:08
Speaker
Association. So it's federation and association, but... It's association football is what soccer is, um as opposed to rugby football, which is a different kind of football. Yes. Or gridiron football or American football, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera.
00:45:23
Speaker
But in the late 19th century, posh British school kids um started calling rugby ruggas. Ruggas.
00:45:35
Speaker
Oh, they're like ruggers. It's ruggers. It's ruggers. want to play ruggers? It's ruggers. Yeah. um And so they started of calling association football soccer, much like brecca and all these other like 19th century British terms that where the kids were adding yeah ER onto the end of shortened versions of the word. Yeah. So association so football became soccer soccer.
00:45:59
Speaker
And was widely used in England for the first half of the 20th century until it became big in America. And then the English people were like, well, if Americans are going to call it that, we're just going to call it football.
00:46:09
Speaker
Yeah. Well, um it's no longer cool. Exactly. Yeah. um ah So, yeah, soccer is a British term. Ah, well, there you go. In there's even, there's there are still people who call it soccer in England, I i want to say. yeah I think in Ireland maybe they call it soccer.
00:46:27
Speaker
no Or Scotland. I swear there's, there's, I know Ireland's not part of England, but I know that there's, there's some English speaking people in that area that, that call it soccer still. New Finland.
00:46:41
Speaker
That's in Canada.
00:46:45
Speaker
But, um, yeah, maybe they do call it soccer. Maybe they call it soccer in Canada. I don't know. Yeah. But, um, anyway, so, um,
00:46:58
Speaker
There's the very small Punjabi, um, uh, like community in Hounslow is constantly seeing her do shit that they don't need to seeing her do. They're constantly and constantly like ratting her out. Like she's constantly it like whether or not she's like done it. Like at one point they see her and Jules at a, um, at a bus stop, like hugging and joking around and kissing on the mouth. They were kissing on the mouth.
00:47:26
Speaker
It's that's fair. Like, I gotta say, if I drove by and saw my friend kissing Keira Knightley on the mouth, I would, as my first assumption would be lesbian. I mean, I would be happy for her, but also like, I wouldn't think, you know, platonic soccer pals kissing on the mouth at the bus stop. Like that's yeah just not where my mind goes. And it's not where, yeah.
00:47:50
Speaker
Pinky's fiance's mother's mind went. Yes. yeah She thought Keira Knightley was a boy. She thought Keira Knightley was a boy and she was outraged at the fact that Jules was kissing our Jess was kissing a white boy.
00:48:04
Speaker
And so they call off the entire wedding because Jules is kissing a white boy. They call off the wedding with her sister because the girl, because the, Their son was marrying a girl whose sister was kissing a white boy at a bus stop. Yes. Yes. And so like, and so everybody's mad at, at Jess and she's just like, what me kissing a boy kissing.
00:48:28
Speaker
And I'm like, m kissing. She's like, I wouldn't kiss a boy. Oh, Oh, kiss Keira Knightley. Oh, I definitely kissed Keira Knightley. Yes, I did. She's my friend and it's very platonic and don't worry about it. It's definitely not gay. Yeah.
00:48:39
Speaker
And they don't. um ah Yeah. Because they're like, oh, well, I mean, they must have made a mistake then. it Because these English girls, they wear their hair so short that it's so easy to just, especially, bless Keira Knightley, flat chested, um teeny tiny, prepubescent Keira Knightley. Yes, yes. With short hair. Yeah, you might think it's a teenage boy.
00:49:05
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, she even like, hasn't she done a, did she do a movie where she dressed up like a boy? am I just thinking of her wearing that cap in Love Actually? oh Um, I want to say she did.
00:49:16
Speaker
i feel like she did. Like a French film? like Oh, it's in Pirates of the Caribbean. She dresses up like a boy in Pirates of the care Oh, there you Pirates of the Caribbean, another DVD that I own that we watched without internet.
00:49:28
Speaker
Great film. It's a great film. Yeah. The in the sequels, not that bad. Not good. Nope. Didn't like them. No. Oh my God. You don't like the second one?
00:49:39
Speaker
No. It's just too- No, I don't like Bill Nye's like, Squid Face. Oh, I love it. It's so good. He looked, that movie is 20 years old and that, that like CGI looks so good.
00:49:53
Speaker
Like, I mean, I know it's, it's partial, it's partial physical, like practical effect and partial CGI, which is why it still looks good. Yeah. Like so much of that movie like looks really good despite, you know, being so heavily special effects and 20 years ago.
00:50:07
Speaker
um Yeah. I, Caitlin and I love all three of them. We would watch all three of them. Like almost every Thanksgiving. Yeah. I fucking love the first one. i' I've watched the first one a thousand and ten times. Like, I know all the words.
00:50:19
Speaker
But, like, I just, I'm just, I just, I don't know. The second and third one just didn't do it for me. Yeah, I still like them. um Yes. So there's some really common tropes here that we've seen in a lot of these movies with like, you know, the especially with um immigrant families and of, um of you know, of families of faith and stuff. I don't know a lot about Sikhism. i mostly Mostly the main thing I know about Sikhism is...
00:50:46
Speaker
Indira Gandhi ah invaded their sacred palace and killed a bunch of people there. There was a massacre at their, like, most sacred palace. And so her... Wait, Gandhi did? No, Indira Gandhi. Oh. Who's... Actually, it's it's a whole thing. She was the um president of India.
00:51:03
Speaker
Okay. um In the late 70s, early 80s. And she, yeah, she she, you know, approved this massacre, basically. And then... But she had Sikh bodyguards, and her Sikh bodyguards murdered her, which, like... Okay.
00:51:15
Speaker
What comes around goes around comes around, right? Yeah. um I might be simplifying that story a little bit. This is all pulled from memory. This isn't a history podcast. I'm pretty sure that's accurate.
00:51:26
Speaker
um That's basically all I know about Sikhs. The sikhs the the men ah don't cut their hair and wear the turbans. That's part of Sikhism. I don't know if Sikhism is more conservative than ah Hinduism. I imagine that it might be.
00:51:43
Speaker
um Because i know that depending on what kind of branch of Hindu you are, many of them are perfectly fine with being gay. Yeah. Even then, like, there's a historical context for gay relationships in in Hindu, like in the, you know... um not the Bhagavad Gita, but the other one, the Upanishad, maybe I'm getting that wrong. Again, not a history podcast. I'm not an expert in religion. I don't know why I'm even talking about it. It does, it did just make me wonder because of, you know, the lesbianism never comes up on their side.
00:52:20
Speaker
um yeah Like at the end, when her mother has that homophobic rant, Keira Knightley's mother has that homophobic rant, they're all like, lesbian i thought she was born in march i thought she was a pisces another one goes lebanese she's punjabi
00:52:34
Speaker
and they're like what why and and like even her sister is just sort of like are you a lesbo now like what and she's like don't you want all of this don't you want this beautiful wedding it is a beautiful wedding like god
00:52:53
Speaker
I love a wedding of any kind, but especially ones with more flair. Yes. its um Yes. so um Her sister finds out that she's playing soccer without telling her parents. Tony and Keira Knightley both encourage her to play on the team without telling her parents, which like, yeah, obviously that's the right move. Yeah. Because um I do love how much this movie is like, lie to your parents. Like the, the, Jonathan Reese Myers is like, yeah, you should lie to your parents. Like your parents don't need to know everything you do.
00:53:22
Speaker
You're kind of an adult. Yeah. I mean, she's 27 years old. Yeah. I mean,
00:53:31
Speaker
um And she's like, don't you want a boyfriend like everyone else? And she's like, no, I want to play soccer with Keira Knightley. And everyone's just like, you're so weird. Yeah. Jonathan Rhys-Meyers gives her a foot massage, which is yeah kind of turns erotic, weirdly. That was another moment that I had Charlie commentary in my ear that he went, he didn't need to take her socks off for that. And I went, no. He wanted to.
00:53:50
Speaker
He wanted to you wanted to um jules's mom is super racist to jess immediately yeah she's like jess is that an indian name she's awful and she's like well maybe you could you know teach jules a thing or two about like respecting her parents because aren't you like so like indian and conservative yeah easy it's like jeez louise um ah this is when This is when they see her kissing Keira Knightley on the bus stop and cancel the wedding. And Archie Punjabi gets so mad that she tells her parents that she's playing soccer.
00:54:27
Speaker
Yeah. Joe comes over to her parents' house looking like a fucking snack. Yeah. But he, like, constantly is just showing up at her parents' house like a stalker. It's just sort of like,
00:54:38
Speaker
What? I mean, like, I think this this time is is is allowed. like This time is allowed, but like the next few times it's like, what? Yeah, yeah. And then as her dad tells her that he was, when he lived in Kenya, he was really a bit good at cricket and he played a lot of cricket. And when he came to England, none of the white like clubs would let him play.
00:55:00
Speaker
Yeah. And that's why his daughter shouldn't play soccer, which is a bit of a stretch. Yeah, because everyone is racist and everything is terrible, which. And she's like, but I but I'm playing on a team right now. So it sounds like you're a little jealous is what it is.
00:55:16
Speaker
Exactly. It sounds like you're living vicariously through me and trying to get your revenge through me. Which is something that parents never do, no matter what their cultural background. yeah No, no, no, no, no. Of course not. ah but They're going to go to Germany to play another team, is like good for them.
00:55:39
Speaker
a long van ride from England to to Germany. to And she- Well, they take a plane. Oh, they do take a plane. You're right. You're right. They get in the van to go to the airport. like Gutenberg. It's like Gutenberg Airlines. Yeah.
00:55:54
Speaker
cutten bur airline
00:56:00
Speaker
Yes, you're right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. They do. They take a plane. They take a plane. Pinky covers for her to tell them that her parents that they're in in. Surrey or something. Yeah, doing that like sister bonding or whatnot. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. um But she goes to Germany to play soccer. She misses the penalty kick and loses the game. Yeah, she's really sad about it. But it's okay. Nobody cares. Yeah. And they go clubbing.
00:56:28
Speaker
And Keira Knightley is wearing that backless, like, handkerchief shirt thing. And it's like, oh, it's so 2002. It's so 2002. It's so 2002. It's just just, oh my god. Like, so many outfits. was America, she would have got it at wet seal.
00:56:43
Speaker
Yeah. But, like, I remember watching this the first time as a teen and being like... How is that? Did she have to tape that? Like where, where's it? Just.
00:56:54
Speaker
Well, she doesn't, she ain't got no boobies. Yeah. I know that now that she just can just like throw on literally ah a sparkly handkerchief and call it a top. It is a sparkly handkerchief. Yes, it is. It's crazy.
00:57:11
Speaker
yeah um And she's like, Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, dance with me. And he's like, no, no, no. And he like dances with her a little bit. And then he starts dancing with Jess. And Kieran is like, no dance with me. And it's like this weird, like, no dance with me, no dance with me thing. Yeah. And Jonathan Rhys-Meyers and Jess go out onto the balcony and she almost kisses him. And Jules sees it. And this causes a big rift between them. Because Jules has big old crush. Yeah.
00:57:37
Speaker
They have to fight over a boy, which is my least favorite part of this movie. I don't understand why they had to fight over a boy. Like their relationship is. If they had just made it it where they were lesbians, we wouldn't have had to have this nonsense side story.
00:57:51
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. That's true. um Because, yeah, it really is underbaked. There's there's very little romance to this. ah There's, yeah, Keira Knightley and Parminder Nogra have more chemistry than any of, either of them do with Jonathan Rhys-Meyers.
00:58:04
Speaker
Yeah. And he's trying. You can see that he's trying. He's phoning it in in this movie a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. because He's very hot, but he's- here and I'm Irish and don't worry about it and da-da-da-da. Ordy-tory-tory-tory.
00:58:18
Speaker
Oh my God, just mean to me. Oh my God, just mean to me. that's Borderline racist accent. After we were making fun of the fact that being Irish and being a person of color is not the same.
00:58:35
Speaker
The hoity-toity-to is a bit much, I think. of a I'm partially Irish. I can say that. It's my culture. I'm mostly Irish. um Yes.
00:58:48
Speaker
He doesn't want them to find his pot of gold. Yeah. Yes. No, he wants Jess to touch his pot of gold, but he doesn't want Jules to touch his pot of gold. Jules, stay away from my pot of gold.
00:58:59
Speaker
um They, ah yes. And so they're fighting, they come back, and they come back Jules gets real depressed. Like, real, real depressed. Like, she can't get out of bed, and um it like when ah Jess gets off the bus, her whole family's there, and they're like, you were doing what?
00:59:20
Speaker
her dad saw in the paper that they were going to Germany and there was a picture of her because they're like a big deal. The Hounslow Harriers. The I'm sure that's what the rival teams called them. Yeah. Yeah. The Harry Harry Hippos. No, that's bad. That's mean. Yeah.
00:59:43
Speaker
Yeah. um a We have this scene where Joe is like, hey, I might be, they might put, let me be the assistant men's coach next year. And she's like, oh, that's great. Good for you. That's like a job promotion for you.
00:59:54
Speaker
And he could stop pulling pints. And apparently there's like a thing that may have been cut out where he works at a bar. um He mentions it like during, like in passing in a few scenes where he's just like, I gotta go open the pub.
01:00:06
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. um Which is like, oh, I got to go open the pub. Yeah. I don't know why it sounds so racist when you do it I'm doing it intentionally.
01:00:18
Speaker
so i can do an Irish. I can do an Irish accent. That's a Leprochard. You sound like the Lucky Charms man. Yeah, that's what I'm doing. Okay. <unk> that It's intentional. it's intentional. But it's the pub that's in the club. So it's the club's pub. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. He works at the club's pub and he coaches the women's side.
01:00:38
Speaker
Yes. um ah And he stopped talking to his dad a long time ago. And um he's saying that, oh, she tells him like, you can't, you shouldn't give up not talking to your dad. And he goes, well, why are you giving up playing soccer then? And she's like, oh, shit. no woa way She goes to see Jules and Jules is having none of it. They get into a big fight. Jules's mother overhears it and assumes that they're gay.
01:01:02
Speaker
Exactly. Another thread as to like, we could have just kept it. Just kept it. She's like, she never wants to go shopping with me. And then her her dad, her her dad's like, it's just not that bad. And she goes, it's terrible what they did to George Michael.
01:01:19
Speaker
know. And he goes, you, it's okay. You still like George Michael. You still listen to Wham. He's like, he's still a superstar. He's still superstar. Yeah.
01:01:29
Speaker
Yeah. um ah This is when ah Jess is like, I need an Indian boyfriend to take the heat off of my parents. And she asks Tony to pretend to be her boyfriend. And he's like, I'm gay, so we can get married if you want. And I'm like, oh, that's real sad. Right? He's just like, yeah, I'm not like the other boys. It's just like, what do you mean? You're a decent human? And he goes, yeah, that and I like boys.
01:01:54
Speaker
she's He's like, I like David Beckham. She's like i like David Beckham too. and he's like, no, I like David Beckham. like David Beckham. We've got the same taste and guess. Yeah. um that Jules and and Jess are in a fight and it's not it's it's it's negatively affecting the team. It's negatively affecting their soccer playing. They're not the unit that they are. They're the heart and the hearten the head. The heart and the head. They're the the left leg and the right leg of the team.
01:02:22
Speaker
Yeah, the left foot and the right foot. Yeah. um Her dad comes to see her play and she scores. Yeah, and he's really good. And this is when she gets the red card. And her father sees um the coach, Joe, consoling her after the racist comment. Yes. Yeah, and he's just like, white boy.
01:02:42
Speaker
Pinky's wedding is back on. Yeah. They're going to have it on the 25th, which is the same day of the final. Of course it is because we have to have some conflict here. Yeah. um ah Joe goes to talk to Jules and she yells at him also. So he goes to talk to Jess and says that there's an American scout coming the last day that he saw them play in Germany and he wants to see them play again. He's interested in both of them, but they're still fighting over boys.
01:03:11
Speaker
um there's a There's a pretty sweet scene where her mother is trying to learn soccer. Jules' mother is trying to learn soccer. This is before she has a homophobic breakdown later on. yeah But like, yeah she's like, okay, my daughter is a lesbian soccer player and I'm going to get on board for a very brief moment. She's like, if you can't bring the mountain to Muhammad.
01:03:31
Speaker
ah yes yeah and And so this was another moment that Charlie was just like, just in case you're wondering, um which I was not. um This was a sort of a stereotype in the 2000s of teaching women
01:03:45
Speaker
uh how to play soccer or the rules of football with um table condiments uh he said it was it was it was very common to do that and he was like not because it was the kitchen or anything just because like that's typically where they were when the they were being explained to and that's just where women are yeah it was like okay okay um So Jess gets her, Jess gets her A-level results, which are good.
01:04:16
Speaker
Gobbledygook to me. Like, I guess it's good. She gets B-R-L-G-T-Q-I plus. Yeah. She gets her L-G-T-Q-I plus levels back.
01:04:32
Speaker
She gets an L, an E, and an S in those. And her parents are like, oh, you can be a solicitor. um ah And she's like, great, gotta to give up this whole footy thing then and take down all my David Beckham posters and quick And then there's this, there's a one shot, which I guess like she's kind of obscured. So might be a stunt performer where she bends the ball around laundry, which is pretty cool. Yeah.
01:04:59
Speaker
And then Joe goes to their night, their house the night before the wedding. Yep. And they're having like the, the night before the rehearsal dinner party, I guess. Um, and he tells her that you got to play. And then her dad comes and he's like, you got let your daughter play, man. This is a big deal. Yeah. Yeah. yeah like Her sister's getting married. And he's like, yeah, this is the final and the scouts are coming.
01:05:18
Speaker
Yeah. And he's like, this is like, this could be really big for Jess. Like this could be like career making. And he's just like, yeah i nobody let me play cricket. He's like, ah you know, you're lucky that your family cares about you.
01:05:29
Speaker
um Then there's the the wedding intercut with the soccer game. The soccer game is they're losing. um Tony finds her. Jess isn't there. Yeah. Tony's there. He tells her to go. And then her dad is like, okay, go to the game.
01:05:43
Speaker
Yeah, he's like, I haven't seen you smile once on one of these giant 2000s camcorder cameras. Yeah. i thought there's There's a fight for the camcorder later, which don't understand why. i think it's because I think there was like this like background like drama story of like, because her mom walks into the restroom at one point and one of the like guests or bridesmaids is making out with one of the groomsmen and then they're fighting later on. So I don't know if it has to do with like who she was making out with or if it has to do with the camera yeah or like what was going on. But like, it's just, it's just, yeah, it's background drama.
01:06:23
Speaker
It feels like there's a scene missing there. Yeah. Yeah. Probably. ah Yeah. So she gets there. Her mom is looking for her at the wedding. um She ah they score and tie it. And then she gets a penalty kick. yeah This is the point where Charlie was just like, she would not be the free kicker. um She especially after she missed it in Germany. Right.
01:06:46
Speaker
um So I guess they can substitute doesn't have even if you got fouled, you can have somebody else take the kick. in soccer, I guess. Did you hear that? No, I didn't. Charlie's adding something to the. Yeah, he said it's a free kick taker is the technical term.
01:07:02
Speaker
Uh huh.
British Soccer Movie Analysis and Key Scenes
01:07:03
Speaker
Or a set piece taker like a set like a like a the ball is set. this he Is what he's saying? Yeah, I don't know. This is what I had to deal with yesterday.
01:07:13
Speaker
Serves me right. Doing a British movie about soccer. Yeah. So does that mean he's heard all the accents? he's heard yours at least, not mine. yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, he's going to hear the full range of accents when he listens to this episode. And then he will be texting you up a storm. um ah he ah So, yeah, she she kind of sees her family blocking the kick instead of the team. Because it's a metaphor. Yeah. Or what she wants.
01:07:41
Speaker
So she and she ah she she shoots the ball and it she makes the penalty kick and they win the game. And she's brilliant. Yeah. know She gets her sorry back on and she meets the ah the American Scouts. um And all of her friends are helping her put her sorry back on. It's so sweet. Yeah. slash At some points racially insensitive, but it's also sweet and then racially insensitive.
01:08:05
Speaker
um ah I guess and and like she's like we got on the the team like they get offered a scholarship at the University of California Santa Clara full ride soccer scholarship there yeah both of them because they're riding the coattails of Mia Hamm baby Yeah, yeah. And um they have, ah yeah, Jules's parents still think she's gay. And she's like, you've your best trousers on. And she's like, I'm going to Jess's sister's wedding. and Like, I bet you are.
01:08:34
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. So her mom drives her over there and then has a racist homophobic breakdown. Yep. Where she's like, how dare you? pretend to be this conservative Indian person racist yeah way while while kissing me well kissing my daughter.
01:08:53
Speaker
Like, and everybody's like, what? Yep. yeah yeah Get your lesbian feet out of my shoes. There's this whole thing where Keira Knightley gave her these shoes to wear. Yeah.
01:09:04
Speaker
Yeah. She's crazy. Absolutely insane. ah Because you think at one point that it's going to be fine, that she's fine with everything. yeah And then you're like, she's Louise lady.
01:09:15
Speaker
Just because you're Jesus. she's Oh, racist and homophobic at the same time. um And then she's like, get in the fucking car, mom. What's wrong with you? And they're driving away. She's I'm not a lesbian. And she's like, oh, okay. Well, nevermind then. It's fine to be a lesbian.
01:09:31
Speaker
Now that you're not a lesbian, it's okay to be a lesbian. We can say that. Exactly. Like every boomer mother ever. Yeah. Um, this is when, um, at the, ah at the, uh, after the wedding, everybody's back at the house and Tony is like, I'll, I want to ask you permission to marry your daughter. And, you know, because she but but she's allowed to go to college wherever she wants. And they're like, okay, we can, we can make that agreement like one because married, whatever. Yeah. Because they're like, they'll never let you go to college unless you're already married, which is insane.
01:10:01
Speaker
Absolutely insane. Um, and, uh, or in America rather than let us go to college in America. yeah Um, And so ah she's like, no, no, no, that's not going to happen. Listen, I got this scholarship. And her mom's like, not in a million years, I'll die before you go to America. And her dad is like, no, it's okay. And her mom's like, okay, whatever your dad says.
01:10:21
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. It's that's it's like a non-fight fight. Yeah. Yeah. um She goes to tell Joe and he's going to kiss her. And she's like, whoa, you're still white. This isn't a rom-com. Yeah. I'm still right white and I'm still in love with Keira Knightley.
01:10:36
Speaker
Yeah. But then like, I guess months later or a little bit later, they're at the airport and he comes to the airport and tells her that he got the job assistant coaching for the men, but he turned it down because he wants to teach the women. And he's like, maybe we'll take it professional next year. And he's like, no just can you just do that? i don't think that's how it works. I don't know. I don't know the ins and outs of this, of the technicality. You need more than one team.
01:10:59
Speaker
Um, and then they kiss and no one's paying attention because David Beckham is there or, you know, an extra made up to look like David Beckham. Yeah. Because they're so far away. You can't tell. but I mean, I'm sure they reached out to his people and he politely declined. Yes.
01:11:13
Speaker
But it is so far away. It is obviously a paid background extra. Okay. um ah And ah then we, they go to college and then we see her dad playing cricket with Joe. It's pretty sweet. It's pretty sweet. It's pretty cute. I will say I felt, I felt bad for the dad at multiple times because um in Jess's culture, um it is, if you're getting married, if the bride is getting married, you have to put all these lights all over the house. um for like the wedding like events and things and so at one scene they're putting the lights up and then the wedding's off and he has to take all these lights down and then the wedding's back on he has to put all these lights back up and it just felt so bad for him because yeah they the lights were all over the house like on the roof like all over like that's a lot of work for this poor man yeah
01:12:12
Speaker
I felt bad for him. And then we have ah in the credits a a real cute like out outtakes and behind the scenes kind of footage. Everybody's singing this like Punjabi version of Hot Hot Hot. Yeah. Hot Hot Hot. Kind of in between takes and there's some like outtakes and stuff and it seems like they had a fun time. Yeah, it seems like they had a really fun time. It's a fun movie. Charlie loves it Charlie loves this movie so much. um I did this for a World Cup and I did it for my husband.
01:12:38
Speaker
um i ah For some reason, in my recollection, there are the Jonathan Rhys-Meyers, Jules, Jess, like, love triangle was a bigger plot point in my brain, but I guess it wasn't.
01:12:51
Speaker
It's
Humorous Apology and Adventureland Discussion
01:12:52
Speaker
a solid B plot, I think. Yeah. It's all a b plot. not Enough to qualify it as a, ah for this podcast. We can do whatever we want. We can do whatever we want for World Cup Viva, baby. For the dozens. We'll watch whatever want. Whatever you want us to do. I was going to say what you want, but then I decided it's what we want. It's what we want. um Speaking of the dozens of listeners, um I do have to issue an apology. um Here's my corrections corner.
01:13:22
Speaker
Corrections corner, corrections corner.
01:13:30
Speaker
That's a real sad corrections corner. Um, um actually? Um, actually? Oh, I love that. That's a little button. Um, actually? mean, I stole it from at least at least two other podcasts to it, but that's fine. They don't own it. That's okay.
01:13:45
Speaker
They don't own it. There's no copyright on it. um The episode on Adventureland came out this week. And it is a great episode. a Great episode, great movie. um Go listen to it now. i have to apologize.
01:13:59
Speaker
I mispronounced my boss slash friend Steve's last name. Oh, no. Multiple times. Like, at least five different ways. gosh. I informed him of it after the fact and then said I would issue an apology on the next episode and then i forgot. Yeah. And then the episode came out. Does he listen? No, but I sent him the episode. i sent I was just like, here's the episode where I mispronounced her last name like five times. And so um it is not Raji.
01:14:25
Speaker
It's not Riaji. It's Riaji. No, it's Riaji. I can't do it. I don't know anymore. i' I'm going to second guess it. I'm just not even going to say it. You're going to mispronounce
Title Controversies and Bend It Like Beckham for American Audiences
01:14:36
Speaker
it again. So you mispronounced it in a way and you're not sure how to correct it. Raji. It's Raji.
01:14:44
Speaker
How's it Say R-E-A-G-E. date ah are are he
01:14:58
Speaker
what's What's his first name? Steve. he's Sorry, Steve. Say it say like you're like like like an angry like New Yorker. like Say it like you're from Long Island, which is where he's from. Wait, is it Italian? And even with your with your totally like valid Italian heritage, you can't say it?
01:15:14
Speaker
I don't know if he's Italian. I know his wife is very Italian. um But i don't know if he's like I don't know if he's Italian. Possibly. He's very Long Island. Reggie? Reggie? Reggie?
01:15:27
Speaker
Just keep saying it different ways and I'm sure one of them will be correct. Reggie. Reggie. It looks like Reggie, but it's not Reggie. It's Reggie. okay Steve, Reggie. That's how he told me to say not going to listen to this anyway, so. Yeah, that's okay. I'm going to send it to him and then maybe maybe they'll listen to it. Who knows? and maybe ah Maybe they'll listen to it in the car together. Steve and Megan. Hi, Steve and Megan. And then they'll be like, we need to fire her. Yeah. She needs to no longer work here. She cannot pronounce names.
01:15:56
Speaker
How can she sell gas? It's very racist against the Irish. I found it so offensive.
01:16:06
Speaker
So racist against the Irish. Jeez Louise, these two redhead ladies. but um Amazing. Well, any other thoughts, feelings, opinions on Bend It to Like Beckham?
01:16:20
Speaker
um Apparently they ah didn't want to call it a bit like Beckham in America because they were like, we don't know what bending it or who who is or who beckam me Beckham is. Nobody cares about the Spice Girls anymore. So they're like, can we change it to, oh man, I forgot what it was, like mash it like Mia or something like that.
01:16:39
Speaker
That makes it sound more like a lesbian rom-com. Mash it like Mia. Mash like Mia. Kiss her. Mia not friends on the yeah gay. Mia Hamm's gay only no hams gay. No. No, but like smash it like Mia.
01:16:54
Speaker
And then you say this is not a lesbian. Mash it like Mia. Oh, I heard smash it like Mia. No, it's it's a literative. You see, it wasn't mash it. Like it's something else. It started with an M though. it was like, um I don't know. We'll never know.
01:17:10
Speaker
not way There's no way to know. I don't know. And the director was like, absolutely not. It's called Bend It Like Beckham and you can release it that way or not at all. ah but So, yeah, that's that's my last fact.
01:17:24
Speaker
Amazing.
Next Movie Announcement and Playful Outro
01:17:25
Speaker
Beautiful. I love it. um What are we doing next week? Next week, we're going to have some fun, Emma. Oh, I love fun. Before the summer's over, we're going to watch the goofiest movie. No, no. I mean, we did do um ah They Came Together. So maybe not the goofiest movie we've ever done, but we are going to go to Del Mar with Barb and Star. Ah, yeah. Have you seen this? I have, and I love it.
01:17:51
Speaker
Yes. Okay. Yeah. So nonsensical. Also, yeah another famous Irishman is in this film.
01:17:59
Speaker
Oh, yeah. What's his name? Fifty Shades of Grey. Yeah. don't remember his name. Which is what I will be calling him. Fifty Shades of Grey.
01:18:10
Speaker
Yeah. um Beautiful. Shall we outro? Let's outro. Beautiful. And we're going to do it in Irish accents. To apologize to our Irish brethren.
01:18:27
Speaker
um Oh my God, I haven't done Irish in a hot minute. Thank you for listening to Go Get Your Girl. If you like us, tell your friends and please rate and review us on Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts. It helps out a lot and we would really appreciate it.
01:18:40
Speaker
Thanks to Andrew Millican and Nick Svoboda for our theme music and Alaina Henderson for our artwork. You can follow us on Instagram at gogetyourgirlpod or email us at gogetyourgirlpod at gmail.com.
01:18:51
Speaker
You can follow me and only me on social media, Emily M. Pizza. Until next time, we're just two girl. Do that again. but Until next time, we're just two girls.
01:19:05
Speaker
Standing in front of the internet.
01:19:08
Speaker
Asking it to love us. Good night. Good night.
01:19:17
Speaker
Silly.