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Episode 5: Joel Miller vs Dexter Morgan – Dark Passengers & Zaddy Issues
24 Plays2 months ago
What happens when TV’s most tortured protector faces off against TV’s most organized psychopath? This week, it’s Joel Miller (The Last of Us) vs Dexter Morgan (Dexter) in a battle of emotionally stunted murder men who just want what’s best for their very specific version of the world.
We break down who wins in a shootout, a sneak attack, or a long weekend of shared grief and moral ambiguity. We unpack Joel’s Zaddy energy, Dexter’s surgical kill routine, and—yes—we accidentally go off on Rita for a while. Sorry, Rita fans. She catches a few strays.
Plus: martial arts analysis, a death count audit, and the definitive answer to whether Dexter and Joel could swap roles.
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Transcript
Podcast Introduction
00:00:07
Speaker
This is the fictional fighting championship podcast, the ultimate battleground where Hollywood's deadliest warriors collide.
Tournament Overview
00:00:15
Speaker
We're taking 48 of the most ruthless, skilled, and battle-hardened fighters from movies and TV and throwing them into a no-holds-barred tournament to see who survives.
00:00:26
Speaker
You've seen in the movies, you know the legends. Now it's time to settle the score.
Meet the Hosts
00:00:38
Speaker
He can't help you. You focus right here. Or I'll pop your fucking kneecap off. I'm Jordan Guerrero. I'm Christian Doherty. And I'm Steve Sadler.
00:00:50
Speaker
And this is the podcast about the greatest fictional tournament in the history of the universe.
Matchup Introduction: Dexter vs. Joel
00:00:55
Speaker
Not even an exaggeration. Chris, who do we have today? We have an exciting one for you. I mean, every matchup is exciting. It's exciting to talk about our favorite characters from all of our favorite TV shows and movies. But today's matchup is a first round matchup between Dexter Morgan, the killer killer and Joel Miller, the post-apocalyptic zaddy.
00:01:22
Speaker
Look that up if you don't know that term. Uh, anyway, you know, we have Dexter, the calculated cunning murder connoisseur, uh, and Joel, the post apocalypse, uh, zombie killing survivor.
00:01:33
Speaker
Uh, yeah, just, I feel like opposite ends of the spectrum. Uh, and it's going to be really exciting. Yeah, that's good one. Can I, before we start, I have to ask you guys, I had watched both seasons and the entire first season, I was calling this guy, Paul.
00:01:47
Speaker
And then, and then in in season two, I discovered his name was Joel. What's up with that? I feel like.
Mandela Effect & Joel's Name Confusion
00:01:54
Speaker
When you binge watch shows, I always forget names and you go through the whole season. You're like, you're always like that guy or that.
00:02:04
Speaker
I was also calling him Paul. I feel like it's a Mandela effect, but it only affects the three of us. One name I do know is the legendary Ray Flores, who I wanted to give a
Shoutout to Ray Flores
00:02:15
Speaker
shout out. He's been doing our intros every episode. So I just wanted to say hey to my buddy Ray.
00:02:21
Speaker
Now we always ask this too, guys, um, before any research, who did you think was going to win this matchup when you first heard about it? I'm giving this one to Joel.
00:02:32
Speaker
Uh, Dexter's great. He's a calculated killer. He's got, we'll find out, but I think a higher kill count probably killed more people. But when it comes down to being an absolute brutal, don't pull your punches kind of guy that has Joel written all over it. So walking into this one, I'm going to say cakewalk, giving it to Joel.
00:02:53
Speaker
And do zombies count as people? Yes. Interesting. In this case. Yes. Okay, cool. Let's ah factor that in. Yeah. I, I, when I first started, i before I did any research, I thought I had Joel for sure. ah Just like you, Jordan.
00:03:09
Speaker
um I thought Joel was going to win, but then after we recorded episode one about Dexter, Um, that kind of flipped it for me. So yeah, I flip flopped about six times. I'll probably do it a few more times. I have a winner now that I've researched it and, um, I challenge you guys to get me to flip flop again.
00:03:27
Speaker
I also had Joel. So it looks like we have a heavy favorite in Joel Miller right now. Paul, Paul, Paul, Paul Miller. Yeah.
00:03:39
Speaker
We just call it. We should just call him Paul from that, from the, for the entire episode. Yeah.
Social Media Callout
00:03:43
Speaker
And if you like stupid banter like this, please give us a follow on Instagram and Facebook. but Even better, though, we're on Spotify. We're on Apple podcast.
00:03:53
Speaker
So please hit follow on
Joel Miller's Character Introduction
00:03:54
Speaker
that. You'll never you'll never miss a show. And if you really love us, tell a friend, tell a co-worker, tell five co-workers, tell your rude uncle who loves action movies like mine. Steve, we won't judge. We're going to be grateful.
00:04:06
Speaker
We want you all here.
00:04:14
Speaker
Nice. Let's go to tail the tape. Joel Miller. We're not going to call him Paul anymore. I feel like he deserves our respect. um He debuted in 2023.
00:04:25
Speaker
Now this is the TV version, of course, that we're dealing with. Debuted in 2023 on The Last of Us. um So this is our rookie year. The video game was in 2013. I didn't play it. I'm going to ask you guys if you played it in a minute.
00:04:38
Speaker
But yeah. We're already breaking our own rule, which we talked about. in that bonus episode. No, we said no video game characters, but here we are.
00:04:49
Speaker
That's right.
Analyzing Joel's Character Traits
00:04:50
Speaker
Because he became a TV character. So I'm totally fine with this one. um He is portrayed by Pedro Pascal. Approximate fight stats for Joel. He's about six one maybe about 200 pounds. And a little, see, this is where it differs from the video game.
00:05:10
Speaker
TV Joel is in his early 50s when he debuts. His home turf, he's in post-pandemic Boston, um Jackson, Wyoming, and several places in between and all around.
00:05:22
Speaker
His signature move, man, maybe ah a stealthy takedown, some kind of a blunt weapon to finish him off. He's got a few favorites. And his vibe check, he's kind of a gruff, grizzled, emotionally closed off dude.
00:05:37
Speaker
But he's kind of gaining a little soft side too. Don't forget Zaddy. zaddy's a zaddy he's a total zaddy chris maybe this is spoiling it i didn't play the game i think you did was he just a zaddy in the game or was this just the zaddy version for hbo he was more zaddy he's more he's in the game he's more grizzled he's more manly than uh pedro pascal pedro pascal i feel like has a little bit of a softer side especially like outside of his characters he's like that funny happy-go-lucky guy so like
00:06:10
Speaker
Yeah.
Defining 'Zaddy' for Joel
00:06:11
Speaker
The video game Joel was, I think, even more gruff. Hold on guys. I just Googled zaddy in case you don't know. It's a sexually attractive man, especially an older one who is fashionable or charismatic.
00:06:25
Speaker
ah Steve, don't take this the wrong way. If by your age, you've never heard the word zaddy thrown your way. um How dare you? All right. Just for that crack, Jordan, guess what we're doing? Oh, we're probably going to kill count.
00:06:39
Speaker
Yeah. We have a score right now. Chris has five. Jordan has three. um And we need the zaddy kill count right now.
00:06:50
Speaker
This is, I don't have to explain this again. You know, you know, the rules kills we we know about, or we're pretty goddamn sure about. All right. So we've got two seasons of last of us. All right. I've got my number. I feel pretty confident on this one. So we already established.
00:07:05
Speaker
We got two seasons of Joel and we're doing not just alive humans, but infected zombie humans as well. Right? Yes, that's right. Okay. All right. I think I've got my number, Chris. I have my number. Yeah.
00:07:16
Speaker
The zombies being people is a huge factor and, uh, he's just, yeah. Joel is bad-ass. There's also, you know, fireflies and other, uh, survivors that he's gone up against. And I said one 60.
00:07:30
Speaker
I'm sure um I was going on the higher end, to see if I could, uh, you know, prices, right. It. Okay. A little. I'm on the lower end at one 45, not that much lower. I think we're pretty aligned on where we think his kills are.
Joel's Kill Count Analysis
00:07:43
Speaker
Yep. You do. You guys are very, very aligned. I'll say that what you're not aligned with is the actual number classic. We know dang somewhere in the in the vicinity of 40 50 kills. only about 30 or 35 on-screen kills.
00:07:58
Speaker
that includes only about thirty or thirty five on-screen kills And then about another 10 or 15 are referenced that he killed before, um you know, things like that. So, yes. We were way off.
00:08:10
Speaker
You guys were way off. But I wouldn't dismiss that those are actually the number of kills that this guy would have had just being, just living in this world for 20 years and surviving and and he's kind of a mercenary assassin. So I have no doubt that he has that many kills. We just can't prove it on this show.
00:08:30
Speaker
you know This is science, man. we don't you know You can't be estimating. We work in exact numbers. That's right. i I was going to say, you you didn't see me play the video game. I destroyed zombies in that game as Joel.
00:08:46
Speaker
and Let's move to Dexter. Second time we've seen Dexter, but I don't even think we did a tail the tape for him back then. So let's do this. um He debuted in 2006 on Dexter on Showtime. He's portrayed by Michael C. Hall.
00:09:00
Speaker
His approximate fight stats. He's about 5'10", 180. And at the time of his debut, he's in about he's in his late 30s. He's fighting out of Miami, Florida. His signature move.
00:09:12
Speaker
Yes, he's got definitely got a finishing move. ah He does the sneaky M99 shot to the neck. ah Plastic wrap treatment. That's Jordan's obsession and talking about plastic wrap. So we'll try to keep that to a minimum this episode. You're making it sound like a latex kink already.
00:09:30
Speaker
a Vibe check for Dexter. Kind of a dead behind the eyes, pretending to be a dad kind type guy. Is he a zaddy or no? Not at all. No, he's too he's too nerdy, geeky.
00:09:43
Speaker
Okay, all right. Kill count, we already did it. Jordan already lost.
00:09:50
Speaker
Well, hold on. I know we glazed over the fact that we completely woofed this kill count here, but can we just give it to me? What's that now? Five to four. I got it. It was something like 45, 145.
00:10:01
Speaker
ah hundred and forty five I was only off by 100, but going to take the win, Chris. You just got prices right. Well done. I'll get you next time. All right. Should we take a break?
00:10:12
Speaker
Let's do it.
Sponsor Acknowledgment
00:10:14
Speaker
Now I want to give a quick shout out to one of our favorite sponsors this season. Ever been slighted by a co-worker only to come up with the perfect comeback six hours later?
00:10:24
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00:10:50
Speaker
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00:10:59
Speaker
Nice. So good. you guys. Thank you so much for your sponsorship. Keeping the lights on as we say. And for the for the listeners out there, i myself am a subscriber to 1-Liner Academy and it's been super helpful, especially for this podcast. So think about signing up.
00:11:16
Speaker
Hey guys, the jerk store called and they're all out of you.
00:11:21
Speaker
See, this is what it looks like when you don't have the subscription.
00:11:27
Speaker
I'm glad at least someone
Joel's Character Breakdown Begins
00:11:28
Speaker
got the George Costanza reference.
00:11:37
Speaker
All right, let's do a character breakdown. Let's get Joel going. ah we We have a lot to talk about this guy. He's an interesting character. ah Battle resume. what do you What's his resume? Anyone want to jump in first?
00:11:49
Speaker
Surviving for 20 years in a post-apocalyptic America, killing zombies you know year after year, also going up against... you know, different groups of survivors, you know, that have banded together, just really having to politic his way through these groups and numerous, I would say that there isn't any one particular like individual he's going up against. It's all like groups of people.
00:12:17
Speaker
Yeah, you you mentioned politicking. I feel like the Joel version of politics is you can agree with what I'm saying or I will shoot you in the goddamn face because that's been pretty consistently the way he approaches every situation.
Exploring Joel's Survival Skills
00:12:29
Speaker
This guy, as said before, doesn't pull his frickin punches here.
00:12:33
Speaker
Super tough, super defensive. Yeah, definitely. Good. It's funny, Chris, when when I heard you start talking, I'm like, wait, did I share my notes accidentally with you? Because I wrote down that he might be, I'm going to read this.
00:12:45
Speaker
He might be most known for just plain surviving in the post post apocalypse for 20 years. So yeah, I think that's more more impressive than his kill count is that this guy is still alive. Yeah.
00:12:58
Speaker
A hundred percent. but Same wavelengths here. This is the podcast, you know? Now, the character this is, this is ah you know, we always talk about the character time period. No difference here.
00:13:09
Speaker
ah The main storyline on the TV show, season one, starts in real time, from what I can tell, 2023. there you Okay. ah there you go um The background and training is interesting. Does anybody have any any thoughts on this?
00:13:28
Speaker
I think it's pretty funny. He's a carpenter. He was a contractor by trade. And because he was a carpenter, supposedly that makes him able to be an absolute badass in the apocalypse. I'm umm just thinking about all the carpenters that I run into at work every day.
00:13:45
Speaker
I'm like, these guys would be fucked. Yeah. Those power tools really come in handy for like slicing up zombies. They usually have strong forearms. they They do. i'd say I'd say like one in 20 look absolutely equipped for the apocalypse. And then probably four out of five just look a little bit high.
00:14:07
Speaker
I do want to dig into this a little bit more, but it's interesting because not too long ago we talked about Christian Wolf. um We talked about some of the other characters that had incredible formal training in a lot of different skill sets.
00:14:23
Speaker
There really isn't any known or implied skills or training that Joel has in any formal way whatsoever. Nope. And that's an interesting distinction from a lot of our tournament competitors, because we're going to hear some crazy backstories on a lot of the characters as we go.
00:14:38
Speaker
But ah yeah, nothing, nothing.
Joel's Arsenal and Enemies
00:14:40
Speaker
He does excel at at at different types of ambushes, survival skills for sure, marksmanship. And, you know, we'll use the, we'll drop a MacGyver reference even.
00:14:50
Speaker
Not bad innovation when it comes to using different types of weapons. Yeah, he's very creative, especially in the video game. You can pick up weapons and get additional tools to combine with those weapons to make them even more deadly.
00:15:04
Speaker
I don't know if it references that in the TV series, but yes, similar sort of, you know, background and skill set, I would say that he has. What about his preferred weapons? Do you see those are the same as the game?
00:15:18
Speaker
Definitely. Yeah. You talked about being able to pick up some weapons along the way, you know, uh, steel pipes, um, wrenches. He definitely has, you know, his knife handgun, and then he uses ah a rifle quite a bit, um, as well. So kind of across the board, anything he can get his hands on to kill things is, uh, is what he's going to use.
00:15:42
Speaker
Yeah, it seems to be big on that, at least in the TV show. you You see him with usually some kind of bolt action hunting rifle. That seems to be his weapon of choice for most things, going for those headshots, making sure that you hit the zombies in the right location and even on people.
00:15:56
Speaker
um One thing you see, I feel like you always see him with a different weapon. It's never the same pistol or rifle or something. So he doesn't seem sentimental to anything in particular. He's the kind of guy who sees it as a tool and will just pick something up and roll with it. And so I think that's going to play to a strong suit here to where he's not too dialed into any one type of weapon. he is the weapon.
00:16:18
Speaker
Anything he touches is an extension of his own badassery. Yeah. I don't necessarily going back to the background and training. I don't necessarily think that his lack of training will set him back because he has had 20 years in the post-apocalyptic world to learn all of these necessary skills. And obviously, you know, at the very beginning, he was probably pretty bad, but We see him as that grizzled, like experienced older a guy in this series. And he definitely has all the skills.
00:16:46
Speaker
Is he the first non-trained contestant that we've had? I think so. Maybe he should have, uh, he should have gone into the military or try to be a saving Navy SEAL or something because, uh, he would have been great.
00:16:58
Speaker
And I should say self-trained as opposed to not trained. Right. Yeah. Let's talk quickly about his types of opponents who who he's gone up against. It's a pretty good array because we have obviously the, you're calling them the zombies, but if infected, i guess that is the obvious one, right? So what do we have? Clickers. We have bloaters.
00:17:18
Speaker
We have runners. Yep. Yep. Those are the three main ones. I think. Okay. And I think that's something that's going to distinguish him. I mean, we'll touch on his human opponents here, but how many other people do we think can take on zombies like this guy? Like this guy's battle resume of actual opponents include the literal undead.
00:17:38
Speaker
Um, this guy's a maniac and i think he's going to go pretty far in this competition with those skillsets. He's taken on humans too. That was something I was thinking of too, before like coming in to record this was that he, um,
00:17:52
Speaker
Yeah, the zombies that he's gone up against. No one else is facing these kind of insane enemies that are just wild, unpredictable, ravenous, super strong, especially bloaters and things like that. So he's he's going up against opponents that are supernatural in a way, and like where a lot of these other people in in their respective TV series or movies, they're not they're going up against other humans.
00:18:15
Speaker
Now, there's another distinction I want to make here, too. We're talking about, obviously, the clickers and bloaters and
Casting Fun Facts
00:18:20
Speaker
whatnot. there's Everybody he sees, though, is like potentially an opposing militia type, like these Fireflies and the Wolves and the Kansas City Raiders. That sounds like a minor league amateur football team or something.
00:18:34
Speaker
That'd be great if they just named themselves after a minor league team. Like they, you know, it's the apocalypse. They find a bunch of jerseys and they're like, you know, fuck it. We're the, we're the Sacramento river cats. You guys want a fun fact before we run the gauntlet?
00:18:47
Speaker
Give it to us. Fun facts. Okay. I enjoy this this kind of thing here too, but I did i went ham on Google. Pedro Pascal was not the only person considered for this role of Joel.
00:18:59
Speaker
There was actually a number of them. Matthew McConaughey, Mahershala Ali, Mads Mikkelsen. Interesting, because that's a Hannibal Lecter reference as well. Josh Brolin, Hugh Jackman, Nikolai Coaster-Waldau, who is Jamie Lannister on Game of Thrones.
00:19:16
Speaker
thought that was interesting. That's everyone That would have been a good casting. Yeah, that's who everyone thinks should have been casted was Nikolai guy, yeah. you You're talking about the gamers, right? That's who they wanted?
00:19:26
Speaker
Yeah, the gamers are really like, I mean, I'm one of them, but I'm not like diehard, so they really were up in arms about all of the the ways that you know the TV series strayed from the games. Kind of stupid, but I think Josh Brolin would have been a good one as well. Josh Brolin is great. I like him.
00:19:41
Speaker
yeah Whoever pitched Mad Mickelson was smoking crack. That's an insane casting for this role. We're going to talk more about some casting here and it might get even more insane. But before we do that, let's run the gauntlet.
Joel's Character Development
00:19:55
Speaker
Keyboard Carnage. I don't have to explain this anymore. It's great. We can save like 15 seconds every time. Keyboard Carnage. I have one here. From a a user review, if trauma could grow a beard, it would be Joel's.
00:20:09
Speaker
pretty good. Are they a therapist? Pretty good. Speaking of therapists. There's no story.
00:20:19
Speaker
Sarah died. And I couldn't see the point anymore. Simple as that. And I wasn't scared either. I was ready. when i
00:20:35
Speaker
Went to pull the trigger. I flinched.
00:20:40
Speaker
Still don't know why
00:20:46
Speaker
That's Joel becoming sentiment. um Talk about a character arc. I mean, a guy who starts, you see him in the opening episode. He still has his family alive there. He's a family man. He's playing with the watch.
00:20:58
Speaker
Then when you run into him, he's a fucking murder maniac. And then come to the end before he's off in season two, he's making custom guitars and trying to repair a relationship with a stepdaughter here.
00:21:10
Speaker
This guy's gone full circle. Spoiler alert. Oh, if if you haven't seen it by now, then come on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No, it's cool. People almost perceive him as an anti-hero just because of how ruthless he is and how far he's strayed from who he originally was.
00:21:26
Speaker
And like, it's like sometimes when he is doing like these different things and killing people, it's like, he's so ruthless. It's almost like you didn't need to do that. Why are you doing that? And then you kind of dislike him for that.
00:21:37
Speaker
And then he starts to come back yep because of the girl, because of Ellie. It's nice. I have one. actually was looking through for you know this keyboard carnage segment, trying to find review you know funny reviews. There were no funny reviews. I was just kind of annoyed that so many people were shitting on season two. One of the reviews was, season two is poo.
Season 2 Criticism
00:21:58
Speaker
but That was it. the You don't have any other, you know, input other than that. Okay. They've gone too far. Do you remember any brutal, what like what was the most brutal injury you saw? And then we'll decide if it was too far or not.
00:22:09
Speaker
All I mean, the one that stands out as going too far for me to survive. This was, gosh, what was this? Like episode six or seven or something of season one. So they're running away from the militia, right?
00:22:20
Speaker
They're in this neighborhood cul-de-sac. They're on their ass. And then all of a sudden, just out of nowhere, the goddamn ground explodes. And you've got zombies running out of the ground, running out of the earth.
00:22:31
Speaker
You got a bloater coming up there. You've just got people coming out of everywhere. And not only are they fighting the militia, they're fighting 200 zombies. And somehow that didn't make the situation more dire. They just fucking got away like it was nothing.
00:22:43
Speaker
Like that was absolutely ridiculous. So you think they went too far? They went too goddamn far. okay But you didn't see Joel's expert sniping skills from the trees. He was absolutely annihilating all the zombies in there. And like, you I'm a huge Joel fan.
00:22:59
Speaker
I don't think he went too far at all. You know what I would say about Joel and his marksmanship?
00:23:06
Speaker
I was the guy who shot and missed.
00:23:12
Speaker
I was the guy who shot and missed. That's right. What was he referencing there? He was referencing that he couldn't save his family. he was He was opening his heart again. probably you know Probably the most graphic scene that I remember that popped in my head was he was stabbed in the gut with like the sharp handle of a broken...
00:23:31
Speaker
wooden baseball bat and it like went in, it was in there deep and he pulled it out and he was pretty messed up. Um, he was, he, he was pretty messed up. So I don't know that it was one of those too far segments because he, he definitely sold it, but that one was pretty gruesome.
00:23:47
Speaker
Yeah. When he, uh, when, when he falls from, I think it's a balcony and, lands on some rebar, goes through him, and then ah Ellie has to help him get out of that situation.
Joel's Injuries & Resilience
00:23:58
Speaker
And then i think he it gets infected or something, and he's like in a really bad way. And they end up in that home, and he you know they're in the basement or the garage, and basically Ellie has to save him.
00:24:09
Speaker
Was that in the game or the TV? I looked for that scene and that was in the TV show where he was like, da he was dying for a whole episode. Ellie's got to bring him back. And once again, Joel pulls bad ass there. And I feel like just the example you gave, right? He's skewered by a giant shard of a baseball bat. Kind of like the one you got behind you right there, Steve.
00:24:29
Speaker
And this guy shrugs it off. Like it's barely anything. I've canceled lunch over a splinter that was big and enough. Like this guy this guy just went on with his murder fast. It's that rugged, tough, zaddy vibe, you know? It just keeps you going.
00:24:43
Speaker
He's like a shish kebab. All right, for your collection, anything you'd like to display on your mantle? His watch. I mean, it's a focal point of the whole series. It has a lot of sentimental value. Be kind of cool. Just kind of sitting up there in a little shadow case, like it's broken. So it's got, got a story to tell.
00:25:01
Speaker
Pretty good. All right. You stole mine with a wristwatch. So I'm going to throw my number two out there. It's going to be the, the guitar that he made Ellie, the one where he did the custom engraving of the moth in it. That was pretty sweet.
Joel's Iconic Items
00:25:12
Speaker
Don't play guitar, but I'd have to learn. Love that. That's a great one. That's a great one. I thought something that was representative of of the character was Joel's backpack. And also, if you want to get morbid about it, the broken golf club that was used against Joel. Brutal.
00:25:26
Speaker
With the the blood still stained on it. Yeah. All right. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker. Did he have any lines? I think most of the lines I screwed up here already were a little bit more of Joel being a human, a little more sentimental than than tough guy talk. But what do you guys think of any?
00:25:41
Speaker
I have one from when he's interrogating those two guys trying to find Ellie's location and he is torturing one of the men asking him to point out on the map where Ellie is. He does so despite him giving the information, which you'd think because I gave the information, he's going to let me go. Joel stabs him right in the chest.
00:26:02
Speaker
Then he goes to the next guy and he was talking about getting information from that guy too to solidify where Ellie is supposed to be. And the guy says, I'm not fucking telling you anything. And Joel just goes, I believe him talking about the other guy he just killed and then just smacks the guy with a steel pipe across the head and kills him too. So yeah, that was kind of like a mic drop moment.
00:26:22
Speaker
Yeah, there's a real action speak louder than words type character. I feel like he's short spoken a lot of the time. He's not whipping out all the one liners, but every one liner he needs to pull out is a fucking stab in the neck or some kind of ridiculous, brutal melee move. Yeah, the the only other one I had written down here is when Ellie, they were kind of arguing Ellie says she's lost everyone else but him. And he says, you have no idea what losses, which was pretty devastating, very cold, just yeah his his grief showing up more than anything.
00:26:51
Speaker
This is before all of his other feelings started to appear because of Ellie. But yeah, I thought that was pretty cold. i I mean, here's one we can throw out there too.
Pedro Pascal's Casting
00:27:01
Speaker
Did we pick the right character for this actor?
00:27:03
Speaker
Good one. hey You know, he's ever since Game of Thrones, he really started picking up in all of his roles, but he has a lot of great action movie roles. And one of my favorite being him playing the snake. Was that his name? The snake when he was in Game of Thrones there and he takes on the mountain.
00:27:21
Speaker
Yep. He defeated the mountain. he He was better than the mountain, except whoops. He kind of just showboated a little bit. He did a Ric Flair. Yep. That was brutal. Getting his eyes gouged out. Yeah.
00:27:32
Speaker
That was absolutely bad. That's a great one. He also has a character, of course, in Gladiator 2. But of course, we have someone from that franchise as well. So I'm not going to spoil it. You won't know who we picked from Gladiator franchise.
00:27:45
Speaker
But we also have someone from the great Game of Thrones franchise too, which we also won't tell you.
00:27:56
Speaker
All right, let's move to Dexter Morgan. Now we know a little bit about Dexter. We talked about him a few weeks ago. We're going to recap. We're not going to do the same categories we did before because that's overkill. We don't need to do that. But we are going to talk a little bit about how he got to this point. He was in a play-in.
00:28:11
Speaker
And if you know anything about tournaments, it's like, okay, there's only one one slot left. So we have to have a play-in round to see who fits into that last spot in the regular tournament. And that's what happened with Dexter. He beat the legendary Hannibal Lecter, two votes to one. Anybody wanted to jump in first and in terms of how did he do it and maybe the biggest factors of him moving to this round?
00:28:32
Speaker
Yeah, I actually want to take you completely off track. So Pedro Pascal's character was not called the snake. I just Googled it again. It was the red Viper, but I think we all get what I was going for there. Same thing.
00:28:43
Speaker
Jumping back, how did he take him? I mean, I disagreed in that one. And after a re listening to the episode and everyone's arguments, I'm starting to come around to it to the methodical way
Dexter's Previous Victories
00:28:54
Speaker
that he approached things. He had his M 99. He had a ridiculous list of kills and think it really came down to experience and planning with him to where Hannibal Lecter just didn't operate at the same level.
00:29:07
Speaker
I think that's his, that's gonna be his path to victory in any opponent he goes up against. I agree. I think ah not only that, that you mentioned his, you know, hit the positive sides of Dexter, but I think in a way it wasn't that Dexter won. it was more that Hannibal lost.
00:29:23
Speaker
I think he was, he's too arrogant, you know, in the film, he let himself be captured. And so you could, um you would imagine that Dexter, he would also, for whatever reason would ah allow Dexter to capture him as well by his own mistakes. So that plus Dexter's planning and skills on top of that, I think is is definitely the reason Dexter won.
00:29:41
Speaker
Yeah, I chose Dexter. I have no regrets whatsoever. the For me, the most crucial piece of information in that play-in round was what sports fans call strength of schedule. Now, Lecter is seemingly more brutal, more graphic, smarter, more intelligent.
00:29:56
Speaker
Dexter's opponents are the most dangerous people on the planet, or at least in Metro Miami area. He's the killer killer. He specializes in killing killing killers, and that's why I went with him.
00:30:07
Speaker
Now, again, I have no regrets. I'm not going to change my mind. But if somebody really wanted to pick Hannibal Lecter over Dexter and made a good argument, I probably couldn't argue with it. Case in point, I want to play you guys this.
00:30:20
Speaker
So I loved this episode. I think it was awesome to hear the different opinions on why Dexter or Hannibal Lecter might have an upper hand in this fight. But personally, I would still think that Lecter would win. And for me, it kind of boils down to a Hannibal Lecter doesn't really feel like a human. He feels like a force of nature that just kills anything. And, you know, that's what makes him dangerous is because you don't know what he's capable of.
00:30:42
Speaker
I think Dexter's life and drive revolves around putting on this facade of being a normal person, and I think that makes him more vulnerable and he has more weaknesses than Hannibal Lecter. But really, I think the way that this fight is framed totally determines who comes out on top.
00:30:57
Speaker
So if Dexter got the jump on Lecter, drugged him and tied him down, then I think Dexter has the upper hand. He's gonna win. But you could say the same thing if the roles were reversed, right? If Lecter had the jump on Dexter, then it's probably over for Dexter. So can we assume that this fight takes place in an arena and they're just duking it out? Or is each person just living their own normal life and handed an envelope with their target's name on it? I think the framing for the fight plays a huge role in determining who wins. That's a good call from one of our best listeners, Will G. Great take.
00:31:29
Speaker
He raises some good points. It's great take. Yeah, I can't even argue with any of it. Yeah, people have asked that question, I think, a lot. It's like this scenario that these fighters are in. and Should we answer that? I think the second... Yeah, let's set the stage.
00:31:41
Speaker
The second scenario that he gave was the correct one. Yes, it is the correct one. It's the one we always intended. The way he worded it is absolutely perfect. So from now on, these guys are getting an envelope handed to them with their opponent's name on it. That's what
Tournament Scenario Clarification
00:31:55
Speaker
it is. It's an actual envelope. They're not getting an email. They're not getting a text. It's a goddamn envelope. And then they open it up, pull out the name, and that's where they're they're going again. It's very elaborate with a lot of flair. There's probably glitter involved. Glitter bomb. A very small explosion. Yeah.
00:32:09
Speaker
Yeah. Any comments on Will's comments about Lecter? well We're not going to change our mind, of course, but great points, and I love to see that. Yeah, obviously I'm salty, and I still think that Lecter should have won. And it's great to hear that Will and the listeners are in my court on this one. But sorry, Will. It's a goddamn fact. Dexter's the winner.
00:32:26
Speaker
Now there is another, ah little piece of unfinished business from episode one. We assumed just by what we saw that Dexter probably has some jujitsu because we saw a couple of rear naked chokes. We saw him choke some guys out and it looked a little bit more than a crude strangulation type thing. It looked like maybe he had some actual technique, but we didn't know for sure. But leave it to another great listener to point this little scene out for us.
00:32:52
Speaker
I know you studied martial arts in college, but I don't know what a lab geek needs with advanced jiu-jitsu. You know what an easy credit is? Shout out to Brendan, who pointed that out. He must have an amazing memory because he was really quick to send that to me. He found the clip on YouTube somehow as well.
00:33:10
Speaker
It was amazing. super impressed that he found that. And then it's amazing that Dexter has jiu-jitsu experience. Because if you guys didn't know, I'm a jiu-jitsu practitioner. And I'm pretty good.
00:33:23
Speaker
Do you also have enough experience to consider an easy credit, but still sell it as advanced jujitsu? It is funny that they refer to it as advanced jujitsu. But yeah, it's definitely not an easy credit. I'll tell you that. Okay, Chris.
00:33:36
Speaker
Just try it out. Come on. I keep trying to get people to come try it out with me. No one wants to roll around and hug me on the floor.
00:33:49
Speaker
Before we roll, we're going to run the gauntlet. Let's do it. This is gauntlet 2.0 because we ran the gauntlet on Dexter before and we're not going to repeat it. So we have a couple of new categories that we're going to try out.
00:33:59
Speaker
This one I like to call, at what age could we take him?
Hosts vs. Dexter Discussion
00:34:03
Speaker
Dexter's a killer. He would kill all of us right now if he wanted to. But at what age could we have taken Dexter? Who wants to go first?
00:34:10
Speaker
I'll jump into this. I feel like the whole concept is, you know, obviously as a newborn, we could take Dexter. But at his age in the show, he would beat us. So right at what age would our very small amount of skills eclipse the skills that Dexter has?
00:34:22
Speaker
So I feel like the highest age. Yeah. Yeah. Well, what's the oldest that you could take him? at I'm thinking you see him in high school. He's killing people. He's killing animals. he He seems pretty deadly. Probably killed a lot more people than me at zero by that age. So I'm going throw it out there.
00:34:36
Speaker
I don't feel confident going up against him after age 12 13.
00:34:41
Speaker
This guy is pretty savage. I think if he had a weapon against me, i would be pretty screwed because he is obviously messed up in the head. Like you said, even as a teen, had a lot of experience killing and maiming animals and shit. So... Very scary for sure. But if it was hand-to-hand combat and he was a white belt going into his first jujitsu lesson, no question, I would have destroyed him. So I'm going to go with like, when is it right before college? Like 17, 18?
00:35:08
Speaker
So 17, 18, you could take him just based on the fact that he didn't take jujitsu until he was in college. Yep. And if he, as soon as he starts to get better at jujitsu and if he ever came as good as I am, which is blue belt, then he would be able to take me.
00:35:23
Speaker
I feel like this is you're at the bar and, you know, after your fifth beer, you go to the bathroom and you break the seal. I think you just broke the steel on Chris with jujitsu because this is like, what, three times in the last two minutes. We can't hear him stop talking about this shit.
00:35:37
Speaker
and So we've had two memorable recurring references because of Dexter. Plastic wrap and jujitsu. Love it. You know what? I think it's safe to assume that Dexter was killing animals by the age of eight or so. And that kind of freaks me out a little bit.
00:35:51
Speaker
And plus, I'm kind of afraid of like any creepy kids that I see in movies, right? Anytime there's like a horror movie and there's like an eerie music playing, there's an expressionless child or something. I'm completely out. So this one scares me.
00:36:05
Speaker
I'm going to say i could take him as a six-year-old. That's hilarious. And I'm not going any higher than that because of the creep factor. I appreciate your honesty. One quick thing. Speaking of creepy kids, how did you feel about in that bloater scene that Jordan previously talked about where all the zombies are coming out of the ground? Ellie goes into a van. Sorry, we're switching back to Joel here. That's okay.
00:36:24
Speaker
What's his name? What's his name? Paul. Ellie jumps into a van. She's hiding out in the van while all the zombies are like doing their thing. The window is so small in the van that the normal size zombies can't get in. But a very, very creepy child zombie gets in through the window because it's small enough and chases her and it's doing all exorcist shit, trying to kill her. And it was very, very creepy. yeah so So I don't know how you felt. You know exactly how I felt. That's exactly what I'm talking about. Anytime a child has awkward movements or like turns its contorts its body in a weird way, or like I said, just expressionless. That's enough for me. I'm i'm out, man. i'm I'm getting weirded out just talking about it.
00:37:01
Speaker
Oh, you know what else I hate? Small children that speak in deep voices. That one also gets me too. what whats What's an example? you You've lost me already. Okay. Like in a horror movie where there's like a possessed child and it has like a devil's voice or something. Yeah. Oh, I'm out.
00:37:18
Speaker
All right. We got to move along here. Let's move along. Another new gauntlet category for for the next round that we're testing out. It's called hell in a cell Joel against Dexter, but guess what? It's not a preview or even an indication of our final judgment.
Dexter vs. Joel: Who Wins?
00:37:31
Speaker
This is hell in a cell is just what you think it is. They're in a cage WWE wwe style.
00:37:36
Speaker
They're in a cage, no weapons, Just hand to hand. They're in an enclosed space. Nobody in, nobody out. Who wins? Who wins? The guy who knows jujitsu. I thought you'd say that. Jordan.
00:37:48
Speaker
Uh, I'm going to go with Joel because I feel like jujitsu is, I mean, I don't know much about it, but it it don't say it looks, it looks like kind of a pussy sport. And, uh, I'm going to say I'm giving it to Joel because he's pretty ruthless and you'd be like, Hey, you were supposed to tap out when you do the arm bar or some bullshit like that. So I'm giving it to Joel for having some actual fighting moves.
00:38:11
Speaker
All right. ah Yeah, look look, Joel's a dirtier fighter. No question. Dexter's been in some hand-to-hand fights. He usually wins them. We know that. But Joel is much stronger than Dexter. He's much more battle-tested in this type of fight. He's killed people with his bare hands before. He just snaps their neck. I say Joel wins this seven out of ten times. big Now, here's another one. We talked about fantasy casting earlier. Here's the one I want to talk about. Michael C. Hall, who played Dexter. but Let's call this one, Could He Play
Michael C. Hall as Joel?
00:38:40
Speaker
the Other Guy?
00:38:40
Speaker
And let's just quickly think, could he have played Joel? He could do the emotional closed off part, right? Kind of morally broken. He could do that part of it. He could do the violence part. i'm I'm imagining it right now, and it's not as bad as I thought at first.
00:38:54
Speaker
Like, obviously, he's not going to be at the same level as Pedro Pascal. But I'm just thinking about all those ridiculous people you list off earlier. Nicholson and Josh Brolin and stuff like that. You know, stack up not too bad.
00:39:05
Speaker
I could I could see him doing it. The show would suck a little bit more, but I could it in there. I don't think he could do the blue collar thing like he's a blue collar, know, construction. I don't think he could do pull up, pull that off too well.
00:39:16
Speaker
No, it's almost like the typecast kind of thing. Like he's almost typecast into that nerdy, weird sort of character. I feel like the only blue collar job he could pull is like a cashier at a frozen yogurt shop. Like that's about as blue collar as it gets for him.
00:39:30
Speaker
So the verdict is this. He could play Joel, but it wouldn't be nearly as good. And when it came to episode two of season two, we wouldn't be nearly as upset. yeah And he's ginger. So no one wants a ginger main character. That's For anyone listening to the podcast and not looking at the video, Chris is a blazing ginger.
00:39:49
Speaker
You're talking about how creepy it is, these little kids with the deep voices. Just imagining ah you're in a hospital, you're walking by, there's a kid with strep throat and you just start throwing holy water at them like, get away from me, demon.
00:40:02
Speaker
Yeah, you all this talk about creepy kids, I'm wondering how you're going to be with ah your granddaughter. Yeah. yeah my my My daughter. Nora gets a cough. Steve is the grandfather of my daughter.
00:40:13
Speaker
is she going to be creepy? No, she's adorable. Absolutely not. Never. Last thing about Dexter before we move on and start to decide who's going to win this
Dexter's Should-Have Kills
00:40:22
Speaker
thing. Who should he have killed?
00:40:24
Speaker
I think Dexter should have killed Rita. She was annoying. She was needy. She had way too much baggage. She took him for granted. She did not appreciate what Dexter was doing for her, let alone did she not appreciate that he was changing his entire lifestyle of killing people to pretend to raise her family. But...
00:40:42
Speaker
There's one major thing that was the final straw. Dexter's in a car. His car flipped over four times. He had a massive head injury. He wasn't even allowed to drive for I don't know how long because he had post-concussion syndrome.
00:40:55
Speaker
He's in there. The kids are screaming. They're singing. The music is loud. No regard for this guy who has a brain injury, and but they have to drive him to work something in the morning. And let me just play this right here.
00:41:07
Speaker
I really need to stop for a coffee someplace. you already had a coffee. We're golden green. Every day. You already had a coffee.
00:41:17
Speaker
Yeah. Unforgivable. Unforgivable. Yeah. And that's why he let the Trinity killer go. or is it the Trinity? Yeah. And then kills Rita. He planned it. It's fine. it's It's all good. He got his revenge, Steve.
00:41:30
Speaker
I don't know. Okay, fine. I wanted her gone. i You got really hung up on that, huh? Yeah. I think that's a good category to put in here because won't spoil who this is, but there is one more person we're going to have in this tournament who should have killed their spouse even more than Dexter. I think I know who it is. I think you know who about. thought of instant. Yes. Okay, good. I like that.
00:41:49
Speaker
All right, we're going keep this one in. It might be the only one we keep in.
00:42:00
Speaker
All right, guys, we have to come up with a verdict here. Okay. So let's do a little bit of a fast paced focused discussion here on both of these guys kind of drew up the game plan for both of them, but let's dig in here.
Joel's Toughest Opponents
00:42:13
Speaker
Toughest opponents and ah you know, and all this, every answer that we have is based on is geared toward how will this help them win this particular matchup toughest opponent. I mean, we already said it. Joel's killing fucking zombies basically. Right.
00:42:25
Speaker
And groups of people. So not just mindless like beings. It's also like people who have brains and who are also calculating, like trying to kill him. And he's still able to like get through them and take care of them as a group. So these are like multiple people, not just one person he's facing. yeah And Dexter, my God, he's killed what was called the most successful serial killer in in history in the Trinity killer.
00:42:47
Speaker
I mean, that's huge. I don't know. Is that worse? Is that worse than a bunch of zombies and militia? I don't know. It's the, the, they both have a compelling argument. And don't forget Dexter has killed Hannibal Lecter.
00:42:58
Speaker
He's building out quite the resume there. He really is. Any favorite moments that you have that might help us decide a winner here for either guy? There was one other scene I wanted to talk about. So, you know kind of a signature spoke a little bit about his iconic, uh, one liner where he's torturing the two, two guys, but there is a part two where he, they're ambushed. Um, and the truck that they're in, uh,
00:43:22
Speaker
goes through a building and then they're being shot at and the guys come in they, you know, are fighting him. He kills one of them. and then the other guy comes in and and is starting to kill Joel.
00:43:33
Speaker
And this really just talks to his like ruthlessness and brutality. And I think he's not going to think twice when it comes to, comes time to have to kill Dexter or to defend the people he loves or himself.
00:43:47
Speaker
Ellie does end up helping him by shooting the guy and getting him off. But, What i thought was kind of crazy and really shows his character is he takes the gun from Ellie.
00:43:58
Speaker
He pulls out his own gun to shoot the guy. The guy drops his knife on the floor and says, here, just take my knife, please spare me, spare me. I'm not armed. Joel picks up the guy's knife, puts his gun away and then proceeds to tell Ellie to leave the room.
00:44:14
Speaker
And so he can then kill the guy with his own knife. So he doesn't waste any bullets. That was, that's like a key thing there. Like you're in post-apocalyptic world, like you need to save ammo and stuff. So he kills the guy with his own knife and yeah, just like a really brutal scene. And there's so many of those types of kills. And I think, you know, he's tough, he's rugged. He's just like, I think he's just gonna get the job done.
00:44:39
Speaker
Absolutely savage. I know we obviously talked about the hospital. I mean, that has to be his most signature scene when he wipes out all of those fireflies. It was a badass move. And then at the end of it, you've got Marlene who's coming out basically in the driveway there.
00:44:55
Speaker
He's killed all the fireflies already. And Marlene is just begging for her life. And he just looks at her like there's a small chance you'll be an inconvenience in my future. Ah, just officer like that, like it was fucking nothing for him.
00:45:08
Speaker
So I think that really speaks to his character here. And his character, we're going to get into later. He reminds me a lot of a post-apocalyptic Jack Bauer. what do you think about this?
00:45:19
Speaker
So he's brutal. He's effective. He has this weird, calm demeanor to all of these kills, too. I'm calling the post-apocalyptic Jack Bauer here. Nice. I like that.
00:45:30
Speaker
I love it. No remorse, no emotion. And he's defending, he's doing something without any regard, except protecting himself or his cause or his family or whatever.
00:45:42
Speaker
Right. Yeah. I love it. One thing that we always take into consideration are brutal injuries, perseverance, of comeback ability, right?
Dexter's Resilience
00:45:50
Speaker
Things like that. I have one here.
00:45:53
Speaker
Dexter, I'm going to give him major street cred and a slight ah you know positive votes here. for getting killed off at the end of Dexter Newblood, the comeback series.
00:46:07
Speaker
And then, despite getting killed off at the end of that, came back for not one but two brand new series this year. And I think that's, you know, if the close calls are brutal, injur that's as brutal of a close call as you can get. This fucking guy was dead.
00:46:23
Speaker
We saw him. He was dead. He came back for two new series. Super resilient. We're really high on Joel here, but Dexter has had his share of close calls as well. He's just not in a post-apocalyptic world that's as rough, and he he lives a lot of ah a lot cleaner of a lifestyle.
00:46:41
Speaker
I think that is swaying our views a little bit yeah too much. But yeah, I don't think we should take that too much into consideration. yeah Now, okay, X Factor.
00:46:53
Speaker
Is there anything that we haven't discussed about either of these guys that makes them especially dangerous in this matchup? I can think of one for Joel. I just wanted to touch on this. We didn't get into it earlier.
00:47:04
Speaker
um i would say that we talked about him i'm not having any formal training, right? That we could tell. But I would say that he has military adjacent skills. Never confirmed to be military, but he handles firearms, tactics, movement, planning, things like that, strategy, ah like someone with actual experience.
00:47:25
Speaker
And i would so we said it before, he's kind of a self-taught, he's self-trained, right? In the Boston quarantine zone, he's ah essentially like a mercenary, right? He's got weapon discipline, situational awareness, right?
00:47:39
Speaker
Even though we don't think he had formal paramilitary type training, it seems as though he has those skills now. um He learned it by just by being alive in the last 20 years.
00:47:50
Speaker
So very cold, methodical. I think that's kind of an X factor for him. He really just is starting to look like an untrained and we keep saying untrained, but he has so much experience. Um, anyway, we'll, we'll say untrained and just rugged version of some of our better competitors, similar to like Christian Wolf or something like that. I won't spoil it, but there are other, you know, secret agents and a military type fighters that we have in the tournament that he is just, you know drawing a lot of similarities to, which obviously I think is, is an X factor. And these guys are all, I think,
00:48:24
Speaker
top contenders.
Dexter's Victory Path
00:48:25
Speaker
And I think he is one as well. Yeah. Let me talk ah really quick about ah Dexter's path to victory, because this is very, very believable to me. It's easy to believe that Dexter could sneak up on Joel after hours and hours of preparation, give him the tranquilizer shot and put him on the table.
00:48:44
Speaker
If somebody told me that I'd have to believe it. Right. And unlike Hannibal Lecter, where we talked about what if he gets on that table, if Joel is on that table, it is absolutely lights out. There's no chance of him getting out. So if that's the the the path to victory for Dexter, I totally believe it.
00:49:01
Speaker
And we've seen Joel get ambushed. We have. Many times. That's right. And the last thing I'll say about Dexter, because I want to give give him this last prop here before we decide, is Dexter kills because he has to.
00:49:14
Speaker
He's not killing out of some sense of vengeance or protecting anything. He kills because he has to. It's what he does. I actually think that's a huge advantage for Dexter.
00:49:28
Speaker
Now it's time settle the score.
Final Verdict: Joel Wins
00:49:40
Speaker
two awesome characters. We have to say goodbye to one. We're all going to pick our winner. I had my winner coming in here. Who do you, who who wants to go first here? So my winner is not my winner is completely unchanged.
00:49:52
Speaker
My winner is reinforced by everything we just talked about. I know we're trying to give them both a fair swing here, but when it comes down to it, Dexter's just outclassed here. He doesn't have the skills that Joel does.
00:50:05
Speaker
He's too morally guided. And I think that Joel is just too much of a savage. We talked about our path to victory, right? Dexter is going to sneak up on him. He'll get him on the table. Yada, yada, yada. Look, Joel could do that too. If Joel was given the same opportunity to sneak up on someone, he could also do something like that.
00:50:20
Speaker
But that's not what this is here. This is who is the ultimate killer. Who is the ultimate badass? And we've got to give that one to Joel. I don't think it's even close. Dexter, get out of my bracket. Yeah.
00:50:31
Speaker
Ouch. Not only is he dead, but you kind of squished him like a like a cigarette butt. You just squished it at the end. You really pulled a Joel there. Wow. Fair. Fair. I couldn't agree more with you, Jordan.
00:50:44
Speaker
it's It's sad. You know, my one jujitsu guy is ah getting kicked out of the tournament, ah killed by Joel. So, yeah, my pick is Joel. Is this proof jujitsu is not a real martial art?
00:50:55
Speaker
Oh, my God. He squished another one right there. Jeez, man. Take it easy. Just ah let let's meet on the mats and we'll we'll see who who's ah the the last man standing.
00:51:07
Speaker
Yeah, we talked about Joel getting ambushed by Dexter, but I think equally, there's plenty of times where Dexter has made mistakes throughout the the multiple seasons that we've seen of him.
00:51:18
Speaker
He's always seeming to, there's always something that tends to go wrong with his plans. And so, you know, we can give him that one kill against Hannibal Lecter, but can he do it repeatedly?
00:51:32
Speaker
And can he do it against like higher caliber people such as Joel or Paul Miller? I think he's also just too nice in a way. He's almost like too much of a nerd maybe. Joel's just that like classical, like tough guy, hard-nosed killer.
00:51:48
Speaker
I just don't see Dexter overcoming that. So we got two votes and on mine doesn't matter. It sounds like, but let me spell this out for you. Dexter beats Joel.
00:52:00
Speaker
If he successfully ambushes Joel on the first try, if that happens, as I said before, he wakes up on that table. He is done. So Joel is gone.
00:52:11
Speaker
Okay. So what is this an asterisk? If good job, Barry, let me, let me do the second part. Now that's how Dexter wins. Here's how Joel wins. Joel beats Dexter if it's a reactive encounter outside of the controlled environment, right? Anything like that.
00:52:30
Speaker
If Dexter fails to neutralize him on the first try, Joel wins. If the environment is messy in any way, tense, chaotic, mayhem, Joel wins.
00:52:44
Speaker
If there's any kind of physical confrontation, Joel wins. And don't forget, if Joel successfully stratizes strategizes a really well-conceived plan, as Dexter is trying to do to him,
00:52:58
Speaker
Joel could also do it. If Joel does it first, Joel wins. Dexter's window of success, while very plausible to me, is just way too narrow for me to pick him. Nothing works that closely to your plan, no matter how well planned out it is, not in this tournament.
00:53:15
Speaker
Maybe in the streets of Miami, but not in this tournament, not even for Dexter. And for that reason, I choose Joel. Wow. That was an absolute blowout. We got a three to nothing. It's our second three O route, but I feel like this one was even more resounding than the first one.
00:53:29
Speaker
Christian Wolf defeating machete was three. Oh yes. All right, guys, another successful podcast. Here's what we have. Joel Miller from the last of us advances to the next round.
00:53:41
Speaker
We all made this decision. It's not opinion anymore. Now it's a goddamn fact. Zaddy wins.
00:53:50
Speaker
Thank you for listening to the fictional fighting championship podcast, the world's premier destination for very serious conversations about completely made up fights produced by Chris Doherty against his better judgment.