Transcript
Speaker: This is the fictional fighting championship podcast, the ultimate battleground where Hollywood's deadliest warriors collide. We're taking 48 of the most ruthless, skilled, and battle-hardened fighters from movies and TV and throwing them into a no-holds-barred tournament to see who survives.
Speaker: You've seen the movies, you know the legends. Now it's time to settle the score.
Speaker: I don't think this is the place my dad was talking about. Is there a different mail room? No, this is the only one. It's not very shiny. Sir, Chuck in the mail room needs to talk to you.
Speaker: Why, Chuck? I mean, what could be going on down that's so important you had to interrupt me? What?
Speaker: I'm Jordan Guerrero. I'm Christian Doherty. And I'm Steve Sadler. And this is a podcast about the greatest fictional tournament in the history of the universe. And that is not an exaggeration.
Speaker: Chris, who do we have today? Oh boy. Today is a first round matchup between us and our listeners.
Speaker: i will say our listeners, heavy underdogs here in this one, guys. We're the ones with the mics. They can't come back at us with any retorts or zings or comebacks. So we'll be controlling the, uh, we'll get the final word is what you're saying. We're go to get the final word, but yes, we have our mailbag episode here today. And, I was pretty pleased. We picked, a pretty good amount of awesome questions and comments and hot takes. So, uh, let's roll man.
Speaker: Before we dive into the mailbag, Jordan, you want to tell our greatest fans what they should be doing? I know most of you are already doing this, but for those who are not followers yet, hit us up on Instagram, Spotify, even Apple Podcasts. We're everywhere. If you really love us, tell your friends, your families, your coworkers, everyone.
Speaker: And please reach out to us on fictionalfcpod at gmail.com. Hit us up with all your questions. We'll read them intermittently. Every once in a while we're going to have these sick mailbag episodes like this. Please send in any questions you got.
Speaker: All right, let's do this. We got question number one from Sammy in Dorchester. I picked this one first because I think it's a good place to start. It's a good reset now that we're in the middle of season two here. Sammy asks, what is the criteria for a character to enter the bracket?
Speaker: I think that's a great question because we actually have an entire episode that goes over the rules that I would like to refer everyone to take a listen to. yup Yes, Sammy, if you were a true fan, you would have listened to this episode already. You wouldn't have had to ask this question. It's like someone to go do homework to listen to a podcast. but We're off to a good start here. Question number one, and Chris is already bashing all of our best listeners.
Speaker: Well, I think there's something good to what she's saying. So just to go to real quickly, like, yeah, the basics that we talked about, no superheroes, no powers, No two from the same actor, no two from the same cinematic universe.
Speaker: You know, that that was the basic stuff that we covered. But I think what she's getting at is maybe deeper than that. How within those rules, how do we come up with the people who we are picking? And there are some characteristics that jumped out to me, but I'm curious to hear what you guys think.
Speaker: Mostly, I feel like it's iconic characters that we know and love that we, you know films that we watch over and over and over again, or cult classics, which are, I think, especially scattered throughout the the brackets.
Speaker: You know, that they're not necessarily iconic or or watched over and over again, but um people know of them and, you know, watching them back is very nostalgic. So, yeah, it's ah' I feel like it's a mix of both.
Speaker: Yeah, that's a great way to put it. These are characters that are very skilled in the types of skills that would make you pretty good in this tournament. But also, of course, we have the the cult classics, like you said, the one the characters that are interesting, the characters that are fun to talk about. And we do have those definitely scattered throughout here. So are these the 48 most deadly warriors in history? Maybe not. Absolutely. we have But we have these rules and we're doing this for entertainment purposes too. So we yeah, we hope everyone likes it.
Speaker: let Let me throw one more. you know We've got the star power, the engaging people, but we've also got some dark horses in here. And I think these are really fun too, because you know we all know that Rambo is going to be in it. We know that John Wick's going to come and clean up.
Speaker: But what about some older movies and movies you're less familiar with? We're going to hit you with those too. You got Snake Plissken from Escape from New York. You got Machete from Machete Movies. We're handpicking from some of our favorite movies to people who would fit in the tournament who you might not necessarily think of.
Speaker: Good question. Great way to start.
Speaker: ah Next question is from Badinky Bones. And Badinky says, love the pod. Sometimes there are action heroes with capability and luck that feels on par with superheroes.
Speaker: While understanding you have to draw the line somewhere, are there any characters who you had a difficult time deciding if they belong in the roster? Are there any borderline supernatural characters that you had to axe to keep things fair and balanced?
Speaker: Yeah. Jordan mentioned him already. I think the line turned out to be machete. Season one, episode two. it it became notorious as we were filming it.
Speaker: ah Yeah, we were like, wait a minute. Yeah. Yeah. Honestly, this guy, i think I won't speak for you guys, but he snuck past me just because I hadn't watched that movie in so long. And I think there should be a new rule.
Speaker: You know, from now on we got to we got to follow this. If we see anyone rappelling down a building using someone else's large intestine, that's an automatic disqualification. yeah Yeah, and you know what I think we should call it? Because this question said, are there any characters we should axe? I don't think we should axe them. think we should machete them.
Speaker: Yes, you can go. Nice. The machete rule. and And he brings up a good point about luck too. I mean, luck can be a skill for some of these characters, as we know. Indiana Jones might be the luckiest man alive, you know, to the point where luck is is literally a skill of his, right? He's just so reckless, but he it never bites him. You have to kind of look past a little bit, but it is something that we can use as as a negative if we think it's it's too much and we don't think that luck would work in the tournament.
Speaker: I have an interesting take here on your point about luck. um It kind of fits in with choosing our characters. Obviously, we don't choose any characters with supernatural abilities or superheroes. But in speaking of luck as a superpower, I think of Deadpool 2. I don't know if you guys have seen that, but there's a superhero in that film, and her superpower is luck.
Speaker: There's an incredible scene. You'll have to go watch it on YouTube or whatever, but she is... the person to survive out of this you know in this one particular scene out of everybody. All of the superheroes die except for her. So um I just think that's kind of funny. But in speaking about superheroes, um yeah, I think it was really difficult to exclude superheroes in this, even ones that are sort of borderline superheroes that feel more realistic. It was difficult. I'm i'm a superhero, you know Marvel, DC fan. so
Speaker: Yeah, like I said, difficult not being able to put those into the tournament and maybe in the future we'll have a superheroes only tournament. Yeah, yeah, that'd be great. Yeah, I think this jumps ahead to a future question we have coming about characters that we wish we're in that are not in. So I'm going to save my response for that one, but I i have someone near and dear to my heart.
Speaker: Yeah, OK, great. Yeah, let's save it. where There is another similar question, too. So that's good. We'll get to that. Then I travel through the seven levels of the candy cane forest and pass a sea of swirly twirly gumdrops. Ooh! Wow.
Speaker: Sucky. Oh, wonderful. Yes! That is marvelous how... Oh, it's very sucky!
Speaker: It's very sucky! Let me reach into my mailbag and pull out the next one. did Did they actually send letters in the mail? Is that what happened here? like Santa Claus. Like the tournament.
Speaker: Here's one from Foley on Mike. He's got a couple questions here. Mike says, hey guys, just wanted to say real quick that I love the pod. The banter kills me. The fights are fun and the product placements are hilarious.
Speaker: Yeah, i love I love the ads too. I've heard about this guy, Foley and Mike. Sounds like a cool guy. He's legendary, yes. ah First one. Which fictional character technically wins most of their fights, but would be kind of unbearable to actually watch do it?
Speaker: So that's a pretty fun question. And I think if I can elaborate that, I think he means like the old UFC argument, right? Where hardcore fans get upset that GSP wrestled, you know, somebody and and beat their ass like that, you know, or, or Randy Couture or something like that. So, um, yeah, that, that's what I think he's getting at.
Speaker: Yeah. I'll, uh, give a call back to our most recently released episode. Um, Ip Man, for me, I think um he's very defensive. He is a reluctant fighter. So a lot of times in the UFC, for example, you can come across fighters who are counterstrikers. And so they will wait for ah their opponent to strike first before countering. The problem with that is if their opponent is also reluctant a reluctant sort of fighter and a counterstriker themselves, they they tend to just do a lot of dancing around each other.
Speaker: I see Ip Man as being very defensive. And Jordan mentioned this in the episode that he is unbeat you know unbeaten. He might be the only unbeaten guy in the tournament based on all of the films. He doesn't seem to lose his fights, but um his fights are kind of, you know, he's always on the defensive. he's He's shying away from getting too involved almost. People are coming at him and he's doing a lot of defending rather than attacking, which can be, I guess, boring in a way. Okay, I think that's fair.
Speaker: This is kind of two-part question fully in. Number one, i'll I'll let Steve get to this one later, but anything Steven Seagal, I don't care if he wins, fuck that guy. He's terrible. Akito is stupid, and everything about this guy is terrible. um I also think he hit on something pretty great, too, about product placements, which is why I'm proud to announce that you have won a free year premium subscription to Go Bag Insurance, because if you don't already have your bag packed, it's too late.
Speaker: GoBag Insurance covers passports, burner phones, piles of money, and unserialized weapons. From safe houses to sudden business trips, GoBag Insurance has you covered. Thank you. And that's a free subscription for Foley on Mike. Is that what you're saying? This is incredible.
Speaker: Free subscription. Unbelievable. He needs this. You know why? This is crazy. Foley on Mike's wife just had a baby, and I bet you they had a GoBag. Oh, wow. Congratulations, Foley on Mike's wife.
Speaker: Hey, you know what? I i also thought I want hear too to his first question. I wonder if Jax Teller might fit this description from Sons of Anarchy going back to season one. His style is pretty ugly.
Speaker: You know, i wouldn't say he excels at any one thing. And I think his victories are all pretty sloppy and brutal more so than than crowd pleasers. So yeah, I think, you know, Jax wins a lot. But if you're looking for highlight reels, I think mostly what you're getting from this guy are head butts and dirty tricks and, you know, teeth falling out on the floor.
Speaker: was a good pick. Foley and Mike has another question. Are there any winners you look back on now and think, wait a minute, why did we vote for them again? This is a toughie. I think we got a lot of heat for the Hannibal v. Dexter episode yeah ah in picking Dexter. So yeah, I think looking back after a lot of input from the fans, it does feel that Hannibal is the more ruthless and insane character here that would certainly have an upper hand against a lot a lot of people.
Speaker: Which one of you picked Hannibal Lecter? I picked it. I'm glad the fans agreed with me. And I think they're going to agree with me again because they will have recently listened to Snake Plissken and Anton Chigurh, where Anton Chigurh won despite Jordan Guerrero knowing that Snake Plissken was the obvious choice here.
Speaker: Write in if you're angry. I want to hear it. All right. We do have some angry fans. And the one that I still think is makes fans the most angry is our season one finale.
Speaker: Leonidas lost to Christian Wolfe. chose Christian Wolfe and I had my good reasons for it. However... The more I think about it, the more I'm not admitting that I was wrong or anything like that. I stand by my pick. But I understand that it's possible that I underrated Leonidas' ability, maybe subconsciously kind of nagged him because he's so ancient. But um that's that one, I get a lot of grief for that one.
Speaker: Before we move on, I had one last thing that I wanted to say, and it is the fact that I feel we are putting Rambo on a pedestal. Okay. And in the episode where Joel faced Rambo, I went with Rambo. but in my heart, I wanted to pick Joel. And yeah, I don't know. I think we're going to get into it later in later episodes when we see Rambo again. But I just wanted to say that I feel like we're putting Rambo on a pedestal. and Maybe he needs to be brought down a few notches.
Speaker: Okay. Okay. I like it. I like it. Well, I'll tell you what, in so in once we get to the Apex 8, you'll be able to talk all you want about Rambo. And Joel Miller from The Last of Us will be able to listen along with the rest of our fans.
Speaker: and ah We're going to get a follow-up to that question, I think. We we have Ben D., formerly of Tucson, Arizona. D., Ben D., last name Dover.
Speaker: Jesus. All right. Here's from Ben. First of all, love the show, guys. Appreciate that you guys have consistently been funny throughout and that Jordan specifically has been consistent in saying the exact opposite of what I'm always thinking. So thanks for that. he so that's consistently Consistently funny. That's That's nice to hear.
Speaker: Chris is dwelling on that. I think Jordan's dwelling on the next phrase that came out of Ben's. Listen, Ben, a listener Seymour, last name, buts wrote in, and he seems to agree with all of my takes. So shout out to him. my favorite listener.
Speaker: Ben has three hot takes. Number one, this might sound familiar because he gave us grief while it was happening. He says Hannibal Lecter should have beaten Dexter. I've never seen an episode of Dexter, but I know enough about the show to say with confidence that he's nowhere near as smart as he thinks he is. let alone as smart as Dexter. ah Sorry, let alone as smart as Lecter.
Speaker: So he already has that working against him. At the same time, based on what you guys said, he appears so obsessed with making sure he walks away completely unscathed. That's true. From his encounters, and Lecter is so clearly willing to fight dirty, biting, scratching, etc., that it seems to me Dexter would simply panic when Lecter inevitably started leaving his mark. And once the panic set in, Lecter would have the advantage simply as a result of sheer calmness.
Speaker: Okay. Well, props to you, Mr. Dover. i know we were talking about how we disagreed earlier, but we uncharacteristically agree on this one. Steve and Chris voted against him. I was with you. And I think that's the right call.
Speaker: yeah I will say I expressed my doubts just previously, but Dexter is very meticulous, calculated, and i do feel that can give him an upper hand against Hannibal. Go back and listen to the episode. You know, we list a number of different reasons why Dexter might beat Hannibal Lecter in a fight. so Yeah, I totally stand by this. I understand the controversy of this episode, but this one I stand by. i would change my mind about Leonidas losing to Christian Wolfe before this one. This one I totally stand by. Dexter kills Hannibal Lecter types.
Speaker: I mean, that's literally his his hobby. True. Over the original run of the series, which was like six or seven seasons, we watched him defeat, you know, like five or six confirmed legit serial killers, including the Trinity killer, who was described at that time as the most successful serial killer of all time. So totally undetected for three decades. I'm talking about Trinity now. No one could catch him. Dexter got him. Dexter killed him.
Speaker: Now, there's a new spinoff that only strengthens my case why I picked Dexter. And this was before, right? I selected him before I watched this new spinoff. I won't spoil too much about it, but it's basically a serial killer all-star lineup. It's like the Pro Bowl game for serial killers. And Dexter just systematically takes them out one by one. That's what he does.
Speaker: I stand by Dexter advancing, despite the controversy. It's a goddamn fact. Ben had another question. ah And of course, he's talking about the other controversial one. Christian Wolfe is without a doubt the smartest guy in the tournament so far, but in every other aspect of his character, marksmanship, hand-to-hand combat, weapons training, access to resources, he is beaten handily by at least one other character we've already met or who you guys have teased.
Speaker: It's for that reason, despite my love for him, I see absolutely zero chance that Wolfe survives even the next round. Forget about winning the whole tournament. This guy has a lot of opinions, man.
Speaker: Dover's got some good takes. Yeah. This one is a little too hot for me. Okay. I want to say Dover, don't be shy. You're thinking about Rambo. You can say it out loud. And I think Chris already touched on that. Don't put them on a pedestal.
Speaker: When we really drill down to it, it's not a cut and dry tournament here. I'm marking Wolf down as a major long shot in the Apex 8 for as far as Ben is concerned here. So good takes.
Speaker: He's got one more take. I forgot. He's got a third question here. Related to the last point, Leonidas should have beaten Wolf. Okay, yeah, we just talked about this. This is great. I'm extremely biased here because I love classical Greek history, but throw me a bone.
Speaker: The simple fact is that if you were to rank the characters based solely on skill with melee weapons and hand-to-hand combat, Leonidas is in the top five minimum. Okay, good point.
Speaker: I cannot think of any other character from season one or from the season two preview who is an obvious superior to Leonidas in this aspect, except maybe Jack Reacher. Okay. That's only because you chose the Alan Richson version of him. And yes, I have seen both accountant films, so I'm aware of Wolf's skill set.
Speaker: Yeah, shit. I mean, we don't have to say much more about Wolf and Leonidas. I get it. Yeah, the frustration is fair. And I feel that too. I have my biases a lot of the time, you know, before running through an episode and hearing these two jabronis give their takes as well. My love of certain characters, I think often clouds my judgment. And I find myself being convinced by by these guys. Certainly. So if for Leonidas is in the same realm as as what I just described, then that's totally fair. It was a very difficult one. And that's why they were both they both got to where they did in the tournament.
Speaker: yeah And to give you just a little bit more there, Chris, I mean, I see you stick to your guns here. I'm thinking it back to William Wallace, absolute fan favorite here who got axed you know he he might not have been the best but god damn he had great hair and we love that man and even though even though steve and i voted against him your love of that island you voted for him and props to that
Speaker: Lastly from Ben, just as a fan note, I'm really excited to hear about the season two characters coming. I can't wait to see Brian Mills, Indiana Jones, Anton Chigurh especially. I actually just watched No Country for Old Men for the first time a few months ago. Be sure to let us know and we can expect the Indy vs. Sarah Connor episode because I want to make sure I actually watch all the Terminator films before it comes out.
Speaker: So as you can tell by listening right now, We recorded this. We had only released the first episode of season two at this point. So that's why Ben, it sounds like Ben's a little bit behind, but don't worry. We'll tell Ben when the Sarah Connor versus ah Indiana Jones one is released.
Speaker: On to the next from Alan Richens Pecs. i love I love these ah usernames. This is great. If you had to pick one character to fight on your behalf, straight up Trial of Combat style, who are you trusting in your corner?
Speaker: I'll go first on this one. um I was excited to actually pick this one. So I'm going to go with Beatrix Kiddo. We have already spoiled her previously. yeah And as you know from that episode, if you're an avid listener, one of my favorite films of all time, one of my favorite characters, she fights with so much conviction and resiliency. She's brought down a number of times, but always comes back. She does not give up until the job is done. And if you've seen the film, you know the crazy 88 scene from from the first film very well. She takes out 88 Japanese samurai Yakuza gangsters.
Speaker: in bloody fashion. So, you know, I think she's tearing through whoever is, uh, is thrown at her. Can't wait for the kill count on that one. Yeah. Would love to have her in my corner.
Speaker: I'll jump in with my favorite here. This could be John wick. I don't know if he's going to win, but I'm putting it in my corner. He's the only person I got a t-shirt for here. Super love bringing competition shooting Matt style into the movies.
Speaker: Super fucking awesome. You can see all of his reloads, his shotgun quad loading, all that bad-ass stuff there. And Keanu Reeves, just a great guy, great character, great movie franchise. John Wick, you're in my corner.
Speaker: Yeah, theres there's so many in here. But how about I throw out a name that you I don't, for as big of a character as this is, I don't know that we've mentioned too much ah yet already. But how about how about Maximus?
Speaker: This guy's absolutely going to be a problem for somebody in this tournament. Yeah, so I would take him. We know he can handle himself. yeah Should I really stir the pot and take Leonidas? Yeah.
Speaker: All right. All right. Here we go. Question number six from Mayhem Mark. Not so much of a question as maybe a suggestion. Mayhem Mark says there's this set of terrible 80s action flicks that try to recreate Arnold being an action star.
Speaker: it would be hilarious to have you guys watch and rip on them. So I think what he means here is for every one Arnold Schwarzenegger movie that came out in the 80s and 90s, there were three terrible knockoffs coming out that tried to replicate them in some way. And ah yeah, there are a number of films I think I could name that fall into this category. So i think it's a really fun idea for maybe maybe an episode of its own.
Speaker: I love the idea of us watching these shitty movies and then and then we could have some battles. I think that'd be awesome. I can think of a couple wild ones. Brian Bosworth starred in one called Stone Cold.
Speaker: Brian Bosworth, the football player, of course. How about The Renegade starring Lorenzo Lamas? And then I don't know if you guys know this, but Dolph Lundgren was actually the original Punisher back in 2004. 2004, wow.
Speaker: and that's funny so Speaking of Dolph Lundgren, what about Dolph Lundgren, He-Man 1987? Yes. I watched half of that movie. Oh my God, it's horrible. I think they're bringing back a new Masters of the Universe.
Speaker: yeah So that was one that was mentioned by Mayhem Mark. We also set aside a couple of trailers of films that he suggested that we watch that fall into this category. Steve, can you queue up those trailers for can
Speaker: When it comes to intergalactic confrontation, no one can beat Chef Ramsay. Excellent work, Ramsay. So what's next? Why don't you try relaxing? But now, he's about to land in a place even he isn't prepared for.
Speaker: Suburbia. Get to know the locals. Blend in. How do you know which ones are the right ones? You have to squeeze it a bit. Wow. I found a good one.
Speaker: Here, they have strange ways of fighting. You got any idea what we're going to do to you? Let me guess. You're going to pound my face. What are you, nuts? This is the niceties We're going to sue you.
Speaker: They have bizarre means of protection. Stand back. You are too close. Thank you. Now. No, please. We are. while there are dangers he's never seen all right you get it suburban commander yeah glad i could help speaking of arnold movies 100 a ripoff of kindergarten cop for those of that don't know and couldn't recognize the voice that was hulk hogan in suburban commando i feel like after kindergarten cop got turned into suburban commando
Speaker: Then when I was in middle school, Vin Diesel came out with The Pacifier. Yes. that's Which was the same movie again. Put him into the tournament.
Speaker: Wasn't Hulk Hogan in another one that was exactly the same called Mr. Nanny? Pretty much, yeah. I watched that on repeat. Great idea, though, Mayhem Mark. I think we should definitely do that.
Speaker: Take a look at this. <unk> Christ, that right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail? Please, Mac, I'm dying to talk about the mail for you all day. Okay. Jordan, you want to take the next one? Former JV high school wrestler, age 40.
Speaker: Who is one fighter you wish could enter the competition, but is disqualified because of the rules? That's a good one. I know we were just talking about ah Vin Diesel and the pacifier. And I got to talk about Vin Diesel again, because he is my take for this.
Speaker: Vin Diesel as Riddick from Pitch Black and the Chronicles of Riddick. So technically in Pitch Black, you find out that he had surgically enhanced eyes, which is why he can see in the dark. You also find out in Chronicles of Riddick, he's the last surviving Thurian, which makes him like kind of a really good warrior race. But at the same time, he's still mostly just a really badass human, technically disqualified, but fuck, I wish he could be in this because those movies were huge for me in middle school, high school, you know, they they're kind of hokey, but they're they're fantastic action movies. So that's my shout out right there.
Speaker: Bring Riddick in. Speaking of badass humans, and this was talked about in that bonus episode, episode two, where we talk about the rules. For me, it's Batman. He doesn't have any superpowers. He is just super rich and super strong. And ah yeah, for me, the Dark Knight series has got to be one of the best movie series, especially superhero movie series um of all time.
Speaker: Yeah. Christian Bale does incredibly well. And shout out to Liam Neeson, who plays Ra's al Ghul. So he plays a great um villain in that. But yeah, Batman, I think was a really difficult one to get past for me.
Speaker: Yeah, those are both good. Yeah, for me, the the rule that was the killer wasn't the superpower rule like both you guys had. It was the rule that we have of only one character per actor. so it was that rule. And there's a couple that I wish we could have used. And there's a couple that come to mind is Cobra.
Speaker: Which is an incredible character from Stallone. Oh, absolutely. And then the other one is Martin Riggs from Lethal Weapon, Mel mel Gibson's character in that. And those are just some really fun characters that would have made for some awesome episodes. But, you know, you can't pick those characters over Rambo and William Wallace. That wouldn't make sense. But yeah, the one actor, one one character per actor rule got me on both of those.
Speaker: Okay, Charlie, I'm gonna have to stop you right there. Not only do all of these people exist, but they've been asking for their mail on a daily basis. It's all they're talking about up there, Jesus Christ, We are gonna lose our jobs. Well, calm down, because here's one thing that's not gonna happen. What?
Speaker: We're not gonna get fired. We're not. Because we've already been fired. Here's a question from Indiana Smith. Hey boys, still undefeated and hypothetical prison yard fights, by the way. Okay. Congrats.
Speaker: Who is the most psychologically terrifying guy left in the bracket? I guess we can go off the board. doesn't have to be still alive in the bracket, but any most terrifying guy psychologically in the tournament for you guys.
Speaker: This guy is still left in the bracket. Anton Chigurh. That guy is creepy as fuck. And, is just so stone cold stare.
Speaker: I would hate to have him on my tail chasing me. Absolutely terrifying. Yeah, that's a good answer. right that's what That's what I had too. Yeah, I'd be terrified he'd flip a coin and I'd guess wrong and he'd give me a bowl cut.
Speaker: Next question from username Jordan's search history. This is so great. You guys are very, very creative.
Speaker: Hey guys, love the show. I just started listening in season two, but plan on binging season one soon. Very good. After the Ip Man discussion, I went back and rewatched that movie and then immediately watched Taken again.
Speaker: Ip Man fights like he wants the fight to end peacefully. Mills fights like he wants the world to end. think So my question How much does morality matter in your matchups? Is fighting the right way ever a disadvantage in the FFC?
Speaker: Yeah. ah Always. I mean, come on. Fighting the right way is always a disadvantage. Don't be silly. yeah We know the answer to this. Yes. Yeah, you can't you can't have any type of weakness. and And Ip Man fights with honor. He gives people different you know chances. He trusts that people are going to change possibly. And yeah, whatever. That's admirable. But it is too dangerous in this format for sure.
Speaker: Yeah, we talked about it many times in that this tournament is as Steve says, quote nuts, insane, explosive. Yeah, you have to bring the heat. And if you leave any wiggle room, any opening, someone who fights dirty is going to take that opening and certainly fighting the right way is ah is a huge disadvantage. And we saw that with it, man. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Key technique we're going to see come in here is like a Dale Gribble from King of the Hill. Pocket sand wins fights. Don't forget to bring pocket sand. About three days ago, a couple of pink slips came in the mail. One for you, one for me. So what did I do? I mailed them halfway to Siberia.
Speaker: All right. Next question comes from the juice. Since you guys love fights and WrestleMania is coming soon. Do you have a favorite WrestleMania moment? Also, is it hard to have a social life with all of your popularity?
Speaker: And do people interrupt you at dinners and when you're out and about? I love this question. the The first part. The second part, I have yet to have anyone recognize me, mainly because they would have to recognize me from my voice. We don't have any video out there of us doing this. But yeah, this is ah this is a really, really cool question. i too am ah and am a WWF fan from back in the day.
Speaker: I have to say my favorite WWF moment. It's not necessarily a WrestleMania moment. I did my research. I found out that this particular moment wasn't WrestleMania, but it was WWF King of the ring 1998, which was a legendary hell in a cell match call out to fictional fighting championship.
Speaker: Hell in a cell match between the undertaker and Mankind, oh boy aka Mick Foley. This particular matchup was so, so brutal. Dudes were flying everywhere off the top of the cage. And ah one particular sort of crescendo moment was when Mick Foley was chokeslammed through the roof of the cell.
Speaker: um And then he smashed his face on a chair. And in that fall, he lost multiple teeth and famously one of those teeth went through his lip and up into his nose, into his ah nostril.
Speaker: That was um a particularly brutal matchup that I remember. And I feel like in comparing it to these these days, you don't see fights like that anymore. Jordan, are you a wwe WWE fan?
Speaker: No. well When w WWF WWE came out, it was too violent for young Jordan to watch. So I was explicitly prohibited. ah Hey, I'll bring it. We're talking about WrestleMania and wwe WWE. Let me bring it around to fictional fighting championship.
Speaker: I am about to put the full court press on you guys to recommend that we we we only have like maybe one or two slots left. And we have about eight different characters that could go into those final two slots and in one of the you know season three or season four.
Speaker: I'd like to make an argument for a WrestleMania one character. contestant rowdy roddy piper's character it's an iconic character called his name is john nada from the movie they live kind of a cult classic and i think that might be a fun one so i i wouldn't mind having a wrestlemania veteran make an appearance in the tournament and i think that would be my pick i'll watch that film
Speaker: All right, next question. From the man with two names. Okay. Long-time listener, first-time emailer. I know Arnold will make an appearance sooner or later. He's the gold standard for action heroes and absolutely perfect for this format. But my question is, this guy has several characters who could do really well.
Speaker: His roles from Commando, Predator, True Lies, Total Recall are just a few. Can you guys spoil which one you selected and how you chose it? Should we spoil it? I don't know if we should spoil it.
Speaker: All right, come on. We should spoil it. I'm all about spoiling No, let's leave him. Let's, let's leave him, leave him hanging. Let's spoil it because I'd like to catch the heat and the controversy way before he enters. Cause he, we haven't had an Arnold appearance yet. He's in either season three or four. I can't remember which one, but we chose one and I'm not a hundred percent convinced we got the right one, although yeah I'm going to roll with it, but go. So who wants, go for it. Jordan, you can spoil this.
Speaker: All right. We chose Dutch from predator, super capable. Why did we choose him over the other ones? Is it because he is the ultimate warrior? I don't know, but he's the most quotable.
Speaker: And that's worth something too. Ramp is great, but Dutch has Riz. He's got a Riz factor of 10. He's got the biceps to back him up. I'm stoked for him. Not to mention the handshake. You son of a bitch. And then the handshake.
Speaker: Also meme worthy right there. That handshake. Definitely. I use that meme quite a lot. The handshake the muscle handshake. Yeah. meme yeah It's awesome. But no, you're right. This guy nailed it. Who is it? The man with two names. And I don't know either name apparently, but duck he said commando predator, true lies, total recall. All those could be apex eight contestants. Right. And then he didn't even mention a couple of the others that I remembered a running man.
Speaker: Amazing. And how about Conan the barbarian? Oh, that's like six different characters. We've teased in previous episodes having a mini episode of an Arnie tournament. We need to do that.
Speaker: Oh, what about, we we can even throw in a Christmas special, Jingle All The Way. how good was that? Yeah, so good. Yeah, he's the gold standard for. Throw in kindergarten cop, why not? All right, what's next
Speaker: All right, next question from Jean-Claude Van Damme's enormous 9.5-inch mullet. sense I like it. Two questions. little dicey there for a second.
Speaker: Two questions. Plot armor is mentioned a lot. You guys tried to remove it from the equation, but is plot armor basically a real power at this point? Second question.
Speaker: And what is the most overrated advantage in fictional fights? Good. Two good questions. Great questions. I'll go with the first one. I hate plot armor.
Speaker: It is the fucking worst. I tend to be very overly analytical when I watch films, especially in regards to how realistic things are, especially if it's a film grounded in reality. So yeah, I, you know, if if anything seems too far-fetched, I'm already kind of like,
Speaker: you know, rolling my eyes. and And when someone survives a very, you know, difficult situation or, you know, almost comes back from the dead, I tend to get pretty annoyed. You know, plot armor is ah is a big factor for me and is almost a negative in a way when I'm when i'm a trying to judge who's going to going to win.
Speaker: That's fair. Jordan, what do you think is the most overrated advantage in fictional fights? yeah I'm kind of on the fence on this one. So something I've noticed in our episodes as we're really getting in and analyzing this is the way that these people are meeting up, right? They get their letter, they've got a face off.
Speaker: Something that we're finding is we end up getting a lot of credit to people's ability to track and people's ability to be hidden, which is going into it, not something that I initially thought would be an all-star skill here. You know, I'm thinking who's the baddest fighter, right?
Speaker: But based on the way that they meet up, being able to track or hide ends up framing the nature of the encounter. And to that degree, let us know in the comments, is that overrated? Because I'm on the fence myself.
Speaker: think I think there's another one that i for me is a little overrated. Maybe snipers. We specifically don't allow someone to get sniped. Otherwise, Katniss Everdeen could win this whole tournament without ever engaging. So, you know, it goes to their overall effectiveness and skill set. But to me, that aspect of it is probably the most useless in this tournament because we try to prevent that.
Speaker: Next writing question from Jungle Warfare Brendan. Similar to the above question, what would be the best superpower to have in an FFC fight? This is a great question. one of my best buddies, Brendan, calls out to you know a potential future season of a superhero bracket.
Speaker: For me, I'm not the biggest DC fan, but I got to go with Superman here. He has it all. Shoots lasers from his eyes. Um, he flies incredible strength, uh, incredible speed well rounded. So I don't know if I could pick one superpower from all of those, but you know, Superman has them all. So i will say if I had to pick one, it would be being indestructible, um, which Superman pretty much is. You don't factor in Krypton. The Hulk also comes to mind, you know, you just can't kill the guy. So he's going to keep coming back again and again and again. no matter you know if you knock him out, whatever. um Yeah, being an indestructible.
Speaker: think he also hit on ah laser beams from the eyes. How sick would that be? I'm thinking Bad Superman here, Homelander from The Boys. Love that series. Yeah, he's a good character. That dude slices and dices everyone with those eyeballs, so that would be a hell of a superpower to have.
Speaker: And in case any of you are thinking of it, only perverts ask for invisibility. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker: All right. Chucky Stormbird says, keep it up, guys. This show rules. If the three of you entered your own fictional fight club and were forced to compete against each other, who would come out on top? Also curious how much the jujitsu experience helps or hurts in this scenario.
Speaker: Jesus Christ. Oh, man. I always thought we would go through an entire episode without hearing about jujitsu. Oh, man. I was worried for a second there that we wouldn't hear about jujitsu.
Speaker: You know what what I'm going to say. Just, you know, you guys going to have to come down to the gym yeah and ah roll roll with me and and then we'll you know see. yeah I don't know, to save time because I don't want to this to run too long, but ah maybe I'll just say what we're all thinking about that question, which is it's obvious.
Speaker: I would destroy both of you guys at the same time. At the same time. At the same time. Here's what we've got. Chris has jujitsu skills, supposedly. He's only thinking about grips. He's thinking about leverage. Supposedly. He's thinking about all these things. Jordan just too. White belt over here.
Speaker: Jordan, on the other hand, he's he's going to be taking big swings, but he's just probably too emotional. Me, I have The only person who's an active competition pistol action shooter.
Speaker: Yeah. Okay. All right. Go for it Go for it. Pistol spelled P-I-S-S.
Speaker: the The copium is pumping through your veins. I can't wait to hear where you're getting with this one. Well, here's where I'm going with this. You look at me, you think I have no apparent skills, but here's the thing. I don't need to fight smart. Yes. I don't need to fight smart. I don't, I just need to be confident to get over on you guys. Okay. I'll let you guys knock each other around first. Um, I'll maybe I'll step aside at the beginning. I just survived all of a sudden, by the time you guys both burn out, I just fucking Hulk out. And I'm to tell you right now, my secret weapon is just 100% pure. Pocket sand. all Unadulterated charisma. And that's how I win this. And that, my friends, is a goddamn fact.
Speaker: Wow. I can't take this fantasy away from you. I'm going to give this one to you, Steve. Okay. Yeah, i'm so I'm speechless here. This is just ignorance at its finest. Thank you.
Speaker: Every day, Pepe's mail is getting sent back to me. Pepe, Sylvia, Pepe, Sylvia. I look at the mail. With this whole box, it's Pepe, Sylvia. So I say to myself, I got to find this guy. I got to go up to his office. like got I got to put his mail in the guy's goddamn hands. Otherwise, he's never going to get it. He's going to keep coming back down here.
Speaker: All right, what's next? We have from XOXO Kelly, formerly Kelly69420.
Speaker: sure When will Jack Bauer? She got scolded for her previous nickname, so she went with something something more polite. In a previous life.
Speaker: When will Jack Bauer be making an appearance to obliterate everyone? I want to see him take on Bourne. Interesting take. um If you're sensing any bias, it's because it was the first like TV MA thing she was ever able to watch as a kid. with her dad and absolutely fell in love with Jack Bauer from the young age. So is completely biased there, but that's adorable. Jack Bauer.
Speaker: Yeah. We've hardly talked about him, or that right? I mean, maybe we've mentioned him once, but this is good. This guy. Yeah. I think he might be underrated coming into this thing, but he has just an insane track record. I love this call out. I can't wait for Jack Bauer. I'm ready.
Speaker: Yeah, it's kind of a sleeper almost. My buddy Sam from England is obsessed with 24. I think I need to give give this series a watch. I haven't seen any really. say Oh, it's tremendous. and And Kelly's right. I think Jack Bauer and Jason Bord would be an awesome episode.
Speaker: I'm stoked. There's like 200 episodes of 24. I started like two years ago. I'm only now... in season nine right now, but he is absolutely my underdog favorite. Yeah. He's so good.
Speaker: His shooting. He's, he's probably the most brutal person in the entire tournament. Like this guy is fucking savage. Yeah. Great shooting. Great hand to hand. Unparalleled ability to track, to escape, to hide. I could see him taking this. He's, he's an apex eight for me.
Speaker: And he has none of that. Remember the question we had earlier about you know morality and doing the right thing? He has none of that in him. Remember he killed that? It was like a fucking senator or something because they were going to drop a nuclear bomb on New York or something. And so he just killed a dude right on TV. Remember that? And you know who it was?
Speaker: It was fucking Michael. might Was his that his name? Michael in Rambo 4. Remember the the missionary guy who went with Rita? I'm so glad someone actually killed him.
Speaker: yeah get yeah The guy that he was going to report. I didn't make that connection. Thank God someone killed Michael. Yes, it was Jack Bauer. Wow, Jack Bauer finished what Rambo couldn't.
Speaker: All right, we got one more, guys. I'm excited for this one. this is one of my favorite questions. This one's from Apex Andrew. Hey guys, loving the pod and the chaos of the tournament. It got me wondering if you've thought at all about what what comes after this bracket wraps up.
Speaker: Have you kicked around ideas for future seasons with different themes or rules? Like maybe a villains only season, a TV bracket only, a TV only bracket, or even something a little weirder. Or is that more of a, let's just survive this bracket problem?
Speaker: Yeah. Awesome question. Yeah, I think on the on the little weirder side, are those cult classic ah Arnie movie spinoffs, I think we could do a whole hard one whole season on that.
Speaker: And as you mentioned, villains only season. I am a huge fan of that idea. i love villains. And I think you know there's so many out there that we could pick from. and We have a couple already in this tournament. Anton Chigurh, Hannibal Lecter. But to do a full villain season would be really fun. That'd be fun.
Speaker: Jordan, you got some good ones? Yeah, i I threw this one out here and I'm stoked. We're going to do it at some point and I'm going force you guys to do it. How about our medical TV show fans out there? I want to see Dr. Robbie from the pit versus Meredith Gray from Gray's Anatomy.
Speaker: want to see George Clooney, Doug Ross fighting with House MD and fuck it. Let's put JD from Scrubs in there too. I want to see the showdown. That's incredible. There's very limited ah examples of them fighting. are we Are we talking about them fighting or doing medical stuff? It doesn't matter. They just deserve an episode and I'm here to make it happen. All right. I like the idea.
Speaker: i have one that I've been weighing and ah episodes like Ip Man kind of got me interested in this. There's so many great competitive fighters out there in TV and movies, but they don't use weapons.
Speaker: So they're at a severe disadvantage in our tournament right now. But what if we had ah a tournament with just hand-to-hand guys? So you could have Ip Man. Maybe Ip Man against Ivan Drago from Rocky. Or you could have Rocky in it, right? How about Tommy, what's his name? Tommy Conlon?
Speaker: Tommy Reardon from Warrior, who I think would be amazing. Yeah. But you could have all these guys. Played by Tom Hardy. Tom Hardy. Tom Hardy. Exactly. We need Tom Hardy in this tournament. Yeah, we do. ah our You know what we should call it?
Speaker: FFC presents the Kumite. I need something to come out of the fact that I accidentally watched the wrong movie for Jean-Claude Van Damme. I'm glad you brought this up. Can we repeat this? Okay.
Speaker: joe Jordan missed an episode. So we had Will G um join us. What was the episode? Look, none of us know. you know It was at Ray Donovan versus ah ah Chance Boudreaux from Hard Target, who was played by Jean-Claude Van Damme. And Jordan didn't want to miss out. He was going the extra mile. I'll give him credit for that. And he said, let me just record a five-minute segment to go, and we can insert it. Since he missed it, he wanted to say hi and do this. So he did.
Speaker: And what does he do? He goes on a three-minute diatribe about the wrong Jean-Claude Van Damme movie. he was He was talking about Bloodsport. It was absolutely fucking hilarious. And i hope it I hope it came across that way in the episode, but go listen to it. It's amazing.
Speaker: ah Shout out to all the Bloodsport fans out there. Worth watching. All right. It's not very good, but if you fast forward to the fight scenes, it was it was kind of entertaining. All right, guys. How do we wrap this up?
Speaker: This has been a good one. we We should do this type of stuff more often. I do like this format. So let's, let's plan on doing another mailbag episode, either at the end of this season, or for sure we'll do it in one, at least one per season. But I think we should definitely do this again. um Yeah. Great questions from our, from our listeners. Everybody came through with some, some good stuff. And next time I want to see even more hot takes and I don't mind taking heat. So I hope ah people aren't afraid to get on us a little bit about some mistakes we made. Like we had a one or two of them in in this episode. So yeah, Yeah, I really love that.
Speaker: Anything to add before we cut out, guys? Yeah, if you have any ah hot takes going against what I've said, you can come meet me at the gym that I train at. I thought you were going to say you can go fuck yourself. I should have said that. Drop the address.
Speaker: You can go fuck yourself and then come meet me at 617 Fight Sports. Badass. Open invitation. Kumite. Let's see it. It all comes back around.
Speaker: All right, guys, great job. We'll see you guys for the next regular episode and the next matchup coming next week. And in the meantime, just remember, it's a goddamn fact.
Speaker: Barney, he's the guy who tipped me off to Pepe Sylvia. Barney? Who the hell is Barney? You don't see Barney. Oh, shit. What the hell are you? You've lost your mind. You've lost your goddamn mind, Charlie.
