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125. Compete Without Contempt: The Eric Weddle Approach to Team Success
3 Plays5 months ago
In this episode of the Especially for Athletes Podcast, we explore the core principle of compete without contempt through the lens of NFL legend and future Hall of Famer Eric Weddle. Eric, who played at the University of Utah before having an illustrious NFL career, shares his unique perspective on competition within a team—highlighting the importance of pushing your teammates to be their best while supporting them along the way.
We dive into a powerful conversation about how to compete fiercely against your teammates in practice, not out of contempt, but out of a desire to make everyone better. Eric’s philosophy was central to his long-lasting career and his leadership, where he helped younger players grow while still striving to outperform them in drills. His approach to competition inside the locker room and on the field offers key insights into what it means to truly contribute to a team’s success.
This episode also explores the broader implications of competing without contempt—how team captains can foster this mentality, how athletes can embrace the grind even when they don’t feel like it, and how the right leadership can make all the difference in building a championship-caliber team.
Key Discussion Points:
- Eric Weddle’s philosophy of competing with teammates in a way that pushes everyone to excel.
- The importance of helping others grow, even when they’re competing for the same position.
- Why competing without contempt is crucial for fostering true team unity and success.
- The role of team captains in creating a culture of healthy competition.
- Insights on how to be a better teammate by showing up to push others to their best.
Whether you’re an athlete, coach, or parent, this episode offers actionable insights into building a competitive environment that encourages growth, respect, and, ultimately, team success. Don’t miss this discussion on competing with integrity and making your team better, together.
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Credits:
Hosted by Shad Martin & Dustin Smith
Produced by IMAGINATE STUDIO
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
Support the show: https://especiallyforathletes.com/podcast/
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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Transcript
Introduction and Podcast Format
00:00:01
Speaker
Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast, where we explore essential principles that empower athletes to learn life's most valuable lessons through sports.
00:00:17
Speaker
Hey, what's up, everybody?
00:00:18
Speaker
Welcome to the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:00:20
Speaker
Dustin, how are you, brother?
00:00:22
Speaker
Hey, Shad, good to see you, buddy.
00:00:24
Speaker
Good to see you too.
00:00:25
Speaker
I'm so excited for this new format.
00:00:27
Speaker
Just as a reminder for those who are coming on to this podcast that we're doing a weekly podcast now.
00:00:34
Speaker
Each week of the month, we're going to focus on a different core principle from especially for athletes and look at what some professional athletes and college athletes and coaches and businessmen and women have taught us on these subjects.
Core Principle: Compete Without Contempt
00:00:48
Speaker
And so,
00:00:49
Speaker
Today, we're focused on our core principle, Dustin, of compete without contempt.
00:00:54
Speaker
And you and I had a conversation with all pro safety, future Hall of Famer, I'm sure, Eric Weddle, played at the University of Utah here and then went on and had this illustrious NFL career, ended in like a storybook Super Bowl.
00:01:10
Speaker
He was coaching his 11U team when we had this conversation with him.
00:01:15
Speaker
And then they call him up and say,
00:01:17
Speaker
We have so many injuries.
00:01:18
Speaker
Could you come back and help us?
00:01:20
Speaker
Then he led the Rams to a Super Bowl championship.
00:01:23
Speaker
Eric Weddle, every single thing he said, it was like a solid 60 minutes when he met with us.
00:01:31
Speaker
He's a very thoughtful person.
00:01:33
Speaker
But in regard to competing without contempt, he talked about something that I think is a key aspect of competing without contempt.
Challenges in Team Competition
00:01:41
Speaker
And it's this within-team competition.
00:01:44
Speaker
I mean, there's the obvious sportsmanship stuff when we're talking about playing our rival and stuff like that.
00:01:51
Speaker
But there's also this competition that exists within a team that sometimes we begin to compete with contempt when someone else starts to get playing time or gets opportunities that we feel like we deserve.
00:02:06
Speaker
And there could be this infighting and lack of unity within a team.
00:02:11
Speaker
And Eric Weddle talked about his philosophy in the NFL, and he actually attributed it a little bit to his longevity in the NFL, why he lasted so long, how he treated his teammates.
00:02:24
Speaker
I just want to listen, Dustin, to what he said about that, and then to get your thoughts as a coach and on this topic of within team competition.
00:02:35
Speaker
So here's Eric Weddle.
00:02:36
Speaker
You know, my last year in L.A., right, I'm the new guy.
00:02:41
Speaker
You know, obviously people know who I am and know my my career I had, but they don't they don't know what type of player I am.
00:02:47
Speaker
So every day I had to show and prove that I can earn a spot on this team.
00:02:53
Speaker
Right.
00:02:54
Speaker
And along the way, I'm helping others.
00:02:56
Speaker
So.
00:02:57
Speaker
When Eric Weddle retires, who's the guy that takes over?
00:03:01
Speaker
John Johnson.
00:03:02
Speaker
And what did he do?
00:03:03
Speaker
He wore the headset just like I did the year before.
00:03:06
Speaker
And he sat right next to me for the entire season.
00:03:09
Speaker
And what did I do between any time the coach was talking, what was I doing with John Johnson?
00:03:15
Speaker
Explaining and coaching and helping him.
00:03:18
Speaker
Because I knew that he's going to take over that role.
00:03:22
Speaker
And where that ended up, he signs a four-year deal, three-year deal in Cleveland for...
00:03:27
Speaker
a lot a lot of money that he did and earned but that would have never happened it may have happened he's a really good player but i would think that helping him and pushing him and competing in him me and him would go in drills every day and i'm trying to destroy him in db drills as a 35 year old and he's a 22 year old kid right because i know i'm pushing him to be his very best
00:03:54
Speaker
But there was never, like I said earlier, it was never ill will.
Eric Weddle's Philosophy and Impact
00:03:58
Speaker
It was never emotionally attached.
00:04:01
Speaker
And the best should always rise up, right?
00:04:05
Speaker
It should never be who your name is, who your parents are, this and that.
00:04:09
Speaker
And that was how I took it, right?
00:04:11
Speaker
If I'm trying my hardest and I'm just not good enough, then so be it.
00:04:15
Speaker
I can live with that.
00:04:17
Speaker
But at the end of the day, my best is usually pretty much better than everybody else until
00:04:23
Speaker
until it isn't.
00:04:24
Speaker
And you have to be, have to understand that and have that understanding that it's okay to do, to be both sides.
00:04:33
Speaker
So Dustin, what do you think?
00:04:34
Speaker
What do you think of his philosophy and what thoughts came to you as he talked about competing
00:04:40
Speaker
with his own teammates.
00:04:42
Speaker
Well, my first thought was, I wonder if people listening really believe Eric.
00:04:48
Speaker
And I've had enough conversations with Eric to know that what he said is true.
00:04:54
Speaker
And what I mean by that is that I could easily see people saying, well, yeah, that sounds great, but
00:05:01
Speaker
Did you really want to help a person, a player who was 13 years younger than you, who was coming for your job, whose goal was ultimately if he plays, that means you're not playing.
00:05:14
Speaker
So he could push Eric out of the league.
00:05:17
Speaker
And this isn't like you don't play for the –
00:05:20
Speaker
for the 14U basketball team.
00:05:22
Speaker
This is you lose your way of living.
00:05:24
Speaker
This is a job.
00:05:26
Speaker
This is professional sports.
00:05:28
Speaker
So that's why so many professional athletes usually aren't super invested in helping their in-team competitor.
00:05:37
Speaker
especially at their position, because they could lose their job if that person got to be better than them.
00:05:43
Speaker
But Eric's approach of he didn't care about that.
00:05:46
Speaker
He was more interested in being an elite teammate.
00:05:50
Speaker
The reason for that is that Eric Weddle cared more about winning than he did about personally being recognized.
00:05:57
Speaker
And the athletes who are more interested in winning, that's what drives them, is winning at whatever costs.
00:06:04
Speaker
And they could be OK if somebody else does well and they don't get the attention as long as they win.
00:06:10
Speaker
That's really the fuel that's driving them.
00:06:13
Speaker
It's easier for those types of athletes then to cheer on and be happy for their teammates' successes instead of feeling threatened by it.
00:06:22
Speaker
Because if they're getting the attention, I'm not.
00:06:25
Speaker
If they're getting the MVP awards or being written about online or whatever or on social media and I'm not, that's an attack on me.
00:06:33
Speaker
They don't look at it that way.
00:06:34
Speaker
They look at it as, no, that means we're playing well.
00:06:37
Speaker
And if we're winning and as a team doing well, but in sports, that could be really
Athlete Priorities and Team Success
00:06:42
Speaker
tough.
00:06:42
Speaker
And I can tell you at the pro levels, I know for a fact that's really tough.
00:06:46
Speaker
I talked to a president of a major league.
00:06:50
Speaker
It was an NBA basketball team just two weeks ago.
00:06:54
Speaker
And he told me that the NBA athletes first want to be respected by their peers.
00:07:00
Speaker
They want their peers to respect their game.
00:07:03
Speaker
They second want to get paid.
00:07:06
Speaker
And the third thing is, is they want to win most of them.
00:07:09
Speaker
So they kind of go through this process where the last thing is that no matter what now, I've got the money, I've got the respect now.
00:07:15
Speaker
I just I want to win a championship.
00:07:18
Speaker
But they usually don't come into the league hellbent on championship or bust.
00:07:23
Speaker
It's
00:07:24
Speaker
I need to get paid.
00:07:25
Speaker
I want to be respected by my fellow competitors.
00:07:30
Speaker
And then the winning comes later.
00:07:32
Speaker
I believe Eric Weddle was one of the unicorns in that sense that I really do feel like he came in with that attitude of all I want to do is win.
00:07:40
Speaker
And I do want to be the greatest.
00:07:43
Speaker
But in that podcast, Shad,
00:07:47
Speaker
he mentioned at the beginning of that podcast in his last year with LA, that wasn't his last year with LA.
00:07:53
Speaker
We did that episode before he returned to LA.
00:07:57
Speaker
This is just seven, four or five months before he returned to LA, they called him out of retirement and he went back and led him to the Superbowl.
00:08:05
Speaker
When we did this episode, it was before that.
00:08:09
Speaker
But he did say that he, he,
00:08:11
Speaker
he would help his opponent, his in-team opponent.
00:08:14
Speaker
So not his opponent, his teammate, who is his opponent when they're in drills at practice, right?
00:08:21
Speaker
But on Sundays, they're on the same team.
00:08:23
Speaker
He had no problem with helping that guy get better
00:08:26
Speaker
And we asked him, well, didn't you feel threatened that they could take your job?
00:08:31
Speaker
And he said something to the line of, yeah, I did.
00:08:34
Speaker
But that made me have to wake up the next day and work even harder.
00:08:38
Speaker
Because I just gave some of my tools that took me years to sharpen to this rookie.
00:08:44
Speaker
I have to go find a new tool.
00:08:46
Speaker
And so understanding that the better you are, if you're on my team, the better you get, especially if we play the same position, is the better I have to get in order to keep my job.
00:08:57
Speaker
So we both can help each other.
00:09:00
Speaker
if we're both pushing each other.
00:09:01
Speaker
And in order to do that, you have to love the game and respect the game.
00:09:05
Speaker
And you have to respect the process enough to be willing to lose sometimes at practice and maybe even lose some playing time.
00:09:14
Speaker
But you want to win by beating your opponent at their very best.
00:09:17
Speaker
You don't want to get the spot because your opponent
00:09:20
Speaker
messes up.
00:09:22
Speaker
You don't want to win a game because the other team plays bad.
00:09:26
Speaker
You want to beat them at their very best.
00:09:28
Speaker
I want you to play your very best, and I still want to beat you and be able to walk out having you know that you gave everything you had today and played your very best game possible and still lost.
00:09:40
Speaker
to me.
00:09:41
Speaker
That's the ultimate competitor.
00:09:42
Speaker
Not because you made a mistake that you don't use.
00:09:45
Speaker
And that's why I won.
00:09:46
Speaker
I'm not hoping that you screw up in order for me to play, to take your spot, or hoping that you screw up in order for us to get the win.
00:09:55
Speaker
I need you to make an error.
00:09:56
Speaker
No, I want you to make a great play.
00:09:58
Speaker
I just want you to not be able to make it because I'm that much faster, stronger, better than you, as are my teammates.
00:10:04
Speaker
That does not happen.
00:10:06
Speaker
If you don't have teammates, put their egos aside and say, I need you to push me so hard to where I want to quit because of practices so that games become easy.
Role of Practice in Team Growth
00:10:17
Speaker
Practices against you have to be harder than games against the team in the other jerseys going to be this weekend.
00:10:25
Speaker
And until you get that with the team,
00:10:28
Speaker
You just have a bunch of individuals interested in accolades and awards and highlights on SportsCenter.
00:10:34
Speaker
You never really have a team.
00:10:36
Speaker
And really, at the end, everybody loses because I don't get any better if you just screw up a lot.
00:10:41
Speaker
And that's why I play.
00:10:43
Speaker
You know what I'm saying?
00:10:44
Speaker
I need you to be your very best and I still got to beat you.
00:10:47
Speaker
That's how I become my best.
00:10:50
Speaker
He was smart enough to recognize that because he was a 5'11", 200-pound athlete who made it to the NFL and is going to be a Hall of Famer.
00:10:59
Speaker
He didn't get there just because he was a freak athlete, bigger, faster, stronger than everybody, no matter what.
00:11:05
Speaker
He wasn't highly recruited coming out of high school.
00:11:08
Speaker
He had to earn it.
00:11:09
Speaker
And in order for him to stay in the league as long as he stayed in it, his approach was, I got to earn it.
00:11:15
Speaker
Not every year.
00:11:16
Speaker
I got to earn this thing every rep of every practice, every day.
00:11:20
Speaker
And that's why he lasted so long.
00:11:22
Speaker
Do you notice what he said about his teammate?
00:11:24
Speaker
Like they tried to kill each other in practice every day.
00:11:27
Speaker
So when we say compete without content, right, even within team, you mentioned this, but part of competing without contempt is leave the without contempt part out for a second.
00:11:42
Speaker
Part of what we're trying to teach is compete.
00:11:45
Speaker
Right.
00:11:46
Speaker
Like you show up every day and you try to kill the person who's in front of you, not hurt, but dominate, destroy, I think was the word that he used there, right?
00:11:58
Speaker
That helps them get better.
00:12:00
Speaker
When you start pouting because you're not playing or thinking other people are getting the position that you deserve or that you want or you give up,
00:12:12
Speaker
then you're making your team worse.
00:12:14
Speaker
And I think an important part of what he said was, I showed up every day and I tried to destroy that teammate in every drill.
00:12:24
Speaker
But then we get off the field and we put on the headset and I'm trying to teach him everything that he doesn't know that I do know.
00:12:34
Speaker
And I think that's an important part of this within team competition that it's not just I save my greatest effort for my opponent, but I'm not going to play that hard against my own team.
00:12:45
Speaker
I love my team.
00:12:46
Speaker
You are doing a huge
00:12:48
Speaker
huge disservice to your team if you do not show up to practice and lovingly try to destroy that person in front of you.
00:12:56
Speaker
But then after your great friends, you try to help them to succeed.
00:13:03
Speaker
And I think that was a really important part.
00:13:05
Speaker
And I know you're passionate about that part of it, Dustin.
00:13:09
Speaker
I have one other question I want to ask you after this, but would you just talk to that person
00:13:15
Speaker
that portion of what he taught us there to be a great teammate, you need to show up and you need to fiercely compete with your own teammates every day.
00:13:23
Speaker
Why is that so important?
00:13:26
Speaker
Because I, you have to respect me or, or love me enough as your teammate.
00:13:33
Speaker
to want me to get better and in order, and I can't do that if you let me off the hook.
00:13:38
Speaker
That's an offense to me, right?
00:13:41
Speaker
It's the same way with our kids sometimes, it's for adults, right?
00:13:46
Speaker
We don't truly give our kids the advantage if all we do is make life easy for them.
00:13:51
Speaker
We have to love them enough to sometimes let them fail, as hard as that is, or let them figure out the answer to something that we might know the answer to and might be able to speed that process up for them, but they need to sit in it for a minute.
00:14:07
Speaker
Maybe a minute means for a week.
00:14:08
Speaker
Like they need to have to figure some things out.
00:14:12
Speaker
And instead of us always swooping down and saying, do this, do this, do this, and then do that.
00:14:16
Speaker
That's what works.
00:14:17
Speaker
I've had this happen to me a million times.
00:14:20
Speaker
Well, how are we going to build the resiliency in them if we don't let them
00:14:25
Speaker
figure some of these things out.
00:14:26
Speaker
Sure, we need to come down and help them and guide them a little bit.
00:14:31
Speaker
But there are certain things that it's not going to be the end of the world if it takes them a week or two to figure it out.
00:14:37
Speaker
In fact, they're going to be better in a year or two from now from having us allow them to have to figure it out.
00:14:43
Speaker
So as your teammate,
00:14:45
Speaker
or you as my teammate, if you really care about me enough as my teammate to want to see me get better, you are gonna be, you're gonna bring it every single practice.
00:14:57
Speaker
And you're not gonna worry about my feelings.
00:14:59
Speaker
And you're not gonna worry about whether or not I, you know, I leave practice upset or defeated.
00:15:04
Speaker
You want me to feel that way, not because you hate me,
00:15:07
Speaker
Right.
00:15:08
Speaker
Not because you want to see me angry or sad or whatever is because you want to see me have to have to shift to a higher gear and work even harder.
00:15:18
Speaker
And then when I do that, you're going to tell me how happy are for me.
00:15:22
Speaker
When you get that sort of camaraderie within a team.
00:15:26
Speaker
where everybody's lifting everybody and the rising sea lifts all the ships because the sea is we're all interested in lifting and going together, then you have a really powerful team.
00:15:37
Speaker
If not, you can have a bunch of really good players all rowing in different directions and at different paces and different times and the boat doesn't go anywhere.
00:15:45
Speaker
And you see that all the time with teams.
00:15:47
Speaker
Why didn't they win?
00:15:48
Speaker
On paper, they've got, look at all these guys that were so good and they're so much bigger and faster and stronger and they don't win.
00:15:55
Speaker
That's the beauty to me.
00:15:56
Speaker
That's the thing about sports that I love the most is and I don't know what the answer is to it.
00:16:02
Speaker
I have coached teams and played on teams that had no business doing as well as they did.
00:16:08
Speaker
And I've had other teams.
00:16:09
Speaker
One of them was with you in college where we should have been much better than we were.
00:16:15
Speaker
But for other reasons and distractions and not everybody on the same page,
00:16:20
Speaker
we never got close to fulfilling the potential that we had.
00:16:24
Speaker
And it was because that whole camaraderie we didn't have in our case, I don't think we had the right kind of leadership and it can destroy teams.
00:16:34
Speaker
And so as a teammate, you're doing me a disservice if you don't do everything you can at every practice to make me fail.
00:16:45
Speaker
and to make me want to give up and say, fine, I can see you're better than me.
00:16:51
Speaker
And if you did do that, right, you, a good teammate would pick them up and say, are you kidding me?
00:16:56
Speaker
You're quitting?
00:16:57
Speaker
Shame on you.
00:16:58
Speaker
You don't quit.
00:16:59
Speaker
Figure it out.
00:17:00
Speaker
We're going to do this again.
00:17:01
Speaker
Like you do not quit.
00:17:03
Speaker
That's how we all get better.
00:17:04
Speaker
You have to have that sort of focus or you never reach your full potential.
00:17:09
Speaker
Yeah.
00:17:09
Speaker
You know, Dustin, the best team I ever played on,
00:17:12
Speaker
was in Southern California basketball, huge schools are huge.
00:17:18
Speaker
We were in the top division, you know, it's a one double A there.
00:17:24
Speaker
And we had this team that made it to the semifinals in California.
00:17:30
Speaker
which is huge.
00:17:33
Speaker
Like I think I looked at 11 of the players on that basketball team went on and played a college sport.
00:17:40
Speaker
So just super athletic.
00:17:43
Speaker
But one thing that we took pride in is that our second team was as good as our first team.
00:17:51
Speaker
Now that probably wasn't exactly true, but there were times in practice where our second team took it to the first team.
00:17:59
Speaker
And I honestly think it was like this upward spiral that the hardest game that we ever played was practice.
00:18:08
Speaker
When we started to play another team, it was like, oh gosh, I could breathe a little bit.
00:18:12
Speaker
Like these guys aren't suffocating me on defense, you know?
00:18:16
Speaker
And I honestly think that's what made that team so great was the second team that pushed that first team.
00:18:24
Speaker
And that led to just my last thought here.
00:18:27
Speaker
And then just any closing thoughts you have on this is we talk about competing without contempt within team competition.
00:18:35
Speaker
I think that team captains who listen to this should really think about how they can intentionally create that environment where practice is about going after one another, making that the hardest competition that they will face that week, including the opponent that you're going to play.
00:18:55
Speaker
And that we foster this idea that we are about killing each other so that we can help each other be better for the game.
00:19:04
Speaker
And a leader that can foster that atmosphere and practice mingled with the love and respect that you have for one another, that you're not standing over your teammate.
00:19:18
Speaker
You're not trying to make your teammate look stupid.
00:19:21
Speaker
You're not trying to create divisions within your team.
00:19:24
Speaker
You're not doing all those things to showboat and make someone feel self-conscious, even though they're trying their best.
00:19:31
Speaker
But you are trying to destroy them.
00:19:34
Speaker
in order to make them better so that when the Friday night lights are on, when that basketball court, you know, the national anthem is over or whatever the setting might be, they're prepared because you've prepared them.
00:19:46
Speaker
And I think that if team captains knew that was one of their roles to foster that atmosphere,
00:19:53
Speaker
they could create that healthy within team competition that will make the whole team better.
00:20:00
Speaker
And I just, I love what Eric Weddle taught us there.
00:20:03
Speaker
I think it's so applicable to every team at every level.
00:20:06
Speaker
Any final thoughts you have on this before we close up the episode?
00:20:11
Speaker
Just that as a coach or as a parent of athletes that you're trying to get them to compete at their highest possible level, that we have to make them earn being great.
00:20:24
Speaker
That you can't give them greatness.
00:20:26
Speaker
You might be able to award them at practice and make it easy to be great.
00:20:30
Speaker
But you cut their legs out from underneath them if you do that, because when the real game comes and the other team isn't going to give you anything and they really have to dig deep, they have to have a shovel that's sharp enough and strong enough to dig deep or they'll never get the depth that they need to to win the game.
00:20:46
Speaker
And that goes back to practice time.
00:20:48
Speaker
And so worrying about feelings and worrying about all that stuff in practice, look, I.
00:20:54
Speaker
The word respect is really important in that.
00:20:56
Speaker
I have to respect you.
00:20:58
Speaker
I'm not trying to embarrass you in a way that I destroy your confidence, right?
00:21:03
Speaker
But that's what you do there is you celebrate small victories.
00:21:07
Speaker
When you're coaching somebody and they do it right, right?
00:21:10
Speaker
You have to make a big deal about it.
00:21:11
Speaker
You got to make sure that.
00:21:12
Speaker
Team leader.
00:21:13
Speaker
Like if you're a team captain and you see someone who's been struggling, do it right.
00:21:17
Speaker
You better make a big deal.
00:21:20
Speaker
Yeah.
00:21:20
Speaker
And talk about it to the rest of the team and point them out and make sure they know, the rest of the team knows that how hard they've been working and they did it today and they beat us today.
00:21:30
Speaker
He pushed me.
00:21:31
Speaker
So he beat so-and-so today.
00:21:34
Speaker
Right?
00:21:34
Speaker
He needs to know.
00:21:35
Speaker
So that kid feels some pride.
00:21:36
Speaker
And then as a group, if you all feel like, look, everybody is sharp.
00:21:40
Speaker
And everybody's trying to, you know, we're all battling with each other because you'll practice a hundred times more or compete a hundred times more against your teammates than you will against an opposite, an opposing team, a different color jersey.
00:21:54
Speaker
You're competing with your teammates for hours every single day for months and months and months.
00:21:59
Speaker
That's where you sharpen your blade.
00:22:00
Speaker
It's not in games.
00:22:01
Speaker
It's in practice.
00:22:03
Speaker
So practices have to have a level of competition to them and a level of,
00:22:08
Speaker
so much competition that there is a level of embarrassment to some degree.
00:22:15
Speaker
But then you got, and that's where you really earn your stripes.
00:22:18
Speaker
Like as a leader, Shad, I mean, if you're my teammate and I'm seeing you regularly in those moments tucking your tail,
00:22:26
Speaker
And wanting to go be by yourself and putting your head down, I can't trust you now.
00:22:30
Speaker
Like, I can't.
00:22:31
Speaker
You're going to lose respect for me if you don't get back and fight.
00:22:35
Speaker
As soon as you start to say, I can't do this, and I'm fine, you're better than me, and you leave, like, I've lost respect for you.
00:22:41
Speaker
Even if coach puts you back in, I'm going to have a hard time looking you in the eye now because you quit.
00:22:46
Speaker
You gave up when it got real.
00:22:48
Speaker
You let me walk on you multiple times and just conceded to the fact that I'm the senior and you're not, or I'm the varsity guy and you're not.
00:22:56
Speaker
If that's the case, you lose the respect of your teammates because you're not tough enough to keep swinging.
00:23:04
Speaker
that's a much harder spot to earn back.
00:23:08
Speaker
You don't just get that in a practice or two.
00:23:11
Speaker
So we gotta push our athletes to understand that.
00:23:15
Speaker
And then the leaders have to be humble enough to accept when they have to be pushed.
Unity and Team Environment
00:23:22
Speaker
You want the Rams hitting each other.
00:23:24
Speaker
Like you've got to get your dudes together and the dudes have to compete.
00:23:28
Speaker
And coaches are, I think good coaches are constantly finding ways to pit their, you know, their alphas against each other and in a healthy way to try to let everybody say that even the ones on this team,
00:23:42
Speaker
are going to battle sometimes for who the alpha, and that alpha can change from day to day or from rep to rep.
00:23:47
Speaker
But that's how you create an entire team of just fierce killers out there that when it's time to now put on the same jersey on a Saturday morning or Friday night or whatever the game is, everybody now comes together because now you're playing no longer for the name on your first and last name.
00:24:05
Speaker
You're playing for your community now.
00:24:07
Speaker
We all put all that aside.
00:24:09
Speaker
Now we're just playing for our school or for our city or for our state or whatever.
00:24:14
Speaker
And we're more interested in winning, winning at this point than we are who plays or who doesn't.
00:24:21
Speaker
It's just winning.
00:24:22
Speaker
And that's when you create a family feeling and you have what's special that you only know it if you've been in it as a player, as a coach.
00:24:30
Speaker
It's hard to get it.
00:24:32
Speaker
And sometimes you try really hard and you just never capture that magical team feeling.
00:24:38
Speaker
But when you have it, that's the addiction that keeps people in sports, keeps coaches coaching.
00:24:44
Speaker
As much as they hate it sometimes, when you get that, that perfect recipe, man, unless you're in it, you don't even know how cool it is.
00:24:54
Speaker
But it's what makes sports so great.
00:24:57
Speaker
I agree, man.
00:24:58
Speaker
And I, you use the word respect there.
00:25:00
Speaker
If you have a teammate that rolls over, first of all, I think a team captain needs to address that and help them build that resilience.
00:25:07
Speaker
That's part of your role.
00:25:08
Speaker
Like, Hey man, don't give up.
00:25:09
Speaker
Get up right now.
00:25:10
Speaker
Stop pouting.
00:25:11
Speaker
Let's go like hit me.
00:25:13
Speaker
You know, like, I think that that could be addressed and people can learn that.
00:25:17
Speaker
But I think the word respect is one word, and I agree with it.
00:25:23
Speaker
I also think when you were saying that, I was like, yeah, it's a trust thing too.
00:25:27
Speaker
Because when that other team is hitting, like you don't want someone that's going to roll over in the heat of battle with you.
00:25:35
Speaker
And so I love that.
00:25:37
Speaker
And I love Eric Weddle.
00:25:39
Speaker
I love what he taught here.
00:25:40
Speaker
If every, especially team leaders, not just them, but especially team leaders, if you take an Eric Weddle approach, I don't care how far you go in sports, that approach, helping those around you be better, everyone wants someone on their team, in their organization, even in their family that is intent.
00:26:01
Speaker
on unselfishly helping those around them to be better.
00:26:05
Speaker
And I love that aspect.
00:26:07
Speaker
And it's a really important aspect of Compete Without Contempt.
00:26:10
Speaker
So it's fun discussing that with you today.
00:26:12
Speaker
Dustin.
00:26:13
Speaker
One other thing, Chad, I might say, you've talked about the captains a couple of times, is that if you have a captain who ducks competition or who tries to duck competition,
00:26:24
Speaker
being singled out in front of the team by a coach or by a player, then you don't have the right captain.
00:26:30
Speaker
Because I believe, my personal philosophy is that as a coach, I've got to push my captains in front of the team more than anybody.
00:26:39
Speaker
I need the team to see that I'll get on the butt of the captain more than I will anybody on the team.
00:26:45
Speaker
And the captains have to know that if you're going to sit in this captain's chair, that's going to be a hot seat because you're going to have a coach on you constantly because you are expected to be you have to be better than everybody in a lot of different areas.
00:27:00
Speaker
as a leader, as a mental toughness and resiliency, and hopefully as an athlete.
00:27:05
Speaker
But sometimes your captains aren't always your greatest athletes, but those other things, they have to be strong.
00:27:11
Speaker
And I don't allow you to become that if I treat you with kid gloves while I'm being tough with everybody else.
00:27:19
Speaker
And the players see that
00:27:21
Speaker
You know, these guys are protected with bubble wrap on them while everybody else is being pushed.
00:27:25
Speaker
So you almost have to go out of your way, in my opinion, to make sure the whole team sees the captains get it more than you do.
00:27:33
Speaker
So that when the captains do tell the rest of the team to pick it up or to go harder, the team can say, yeah, well, he's kind of earned that.
00:27:40
Speaker
I mean, I've seen how coach treats him.
00:27:42
Speaker
Or when me as the coach, if I come at you and you're not a captain, you don't go home and say, he only picks on the, you know, he only really comes at this particular group and expects them.
00:27:54
Speaker
But he doesn't expect the captains or the varsity guys to, they better win every sprint.
00:28:00
Speaker
They better be there earlier and leave later than everybody.
00:28:03
Speaker
They better be the best in classrooms.
00:28:06
Speaker
If not, then you have the wrong captains.
00:28:08
Speaker
And it's just lip service to everybody.
00:28:10
Speaker
And eventually that'll catch up to you.
00:28:14
Speaker
Anyway, that's my last thought.
00:28:16
Speaker
Awesome thought.
00:28:18
Speaker
Thank you everyone for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:28:21
Speaker
Compete without contempt, even within your own team.
00:28:24
Speaker
Eyes up, do the work.
00:28:26
Speaker
Thank you for joining the Especially for Athletes podcast.
00:28:29
Speaker
To learn more about Especially for Athletes organization, get a copy of our book, The Sport Light, or to bring our program to your team, school, business, or organization, visit us at especiallyforathletes.org.