Transcript
Speaker: What are you trying to say?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Let's see.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Welcome to Cliff Notes Continued, where we improvise the stories authors are too lazy to write.
Speaker: I'm Lucas Larson.
Speaker: And I am Anania George.
Speaker: Oh, that.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I think that's it.
Speaker: I think that's it.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: That's our intro.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That's our intro.
Speaker: Welcome to episode one of Cliff Notes Continued.
Speaker: On Cliff Notes Continued, we read the cliff notes of a book and then improvise a story based on what we just read.
Speaker: The book for episode one is The Last Battle by C.S.
Speaker: Lewis in the Chronicles of Narnia Saga.
Speaker: I hope you enjoy, and here are the cliff notes.
Speaker: The last battle revolves around the final conflict between invading Calamans and loyal Narnians, led by King Tarion.
Speaker: Tyrion?
Speaker: Tyrion.
Speaker: We'll go with Tyrion.
Speaker: Tryon?
Speaker: No, it has an eye.
Speaker: It has two eyes.
Speaker: Yeah, he's trying hard.
Speaker: Oh, Tyrion.
Speaker: Okay, tryon.
Speaker: We'll go tryon.
Speaker: The battle also signifies the impending end of the world.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: I added myself.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Beings of Narnia face judgment in Aswin's country.
Speaker: The narrative follows events involving a lion skin worn by a donkey named Puzzle manipulated by an ape named Shift to impersonate Aswin.
Speaker: Who's Aswin again?
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: He's Lion Jesus.
Speaker: No, I thought that was Triad.
Speaker: No, that's Aslan.
Speaker: Who's Triad?
Speaker: I don't fucking know.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Hold on, hold on.
Speaker: I'm writing down all the characters.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Like, it's a donkey named Puzzle, an ape named Shift.
Speaker: Aslan and Trilad is who we have so far.
Speaker: King Tyrion.
Speaker: Okay, Tyrion.
Speaker: Okay, Tyrion and his unicorn companion, Jule.
Speaker: Okay, we got Jule now.
Speaker: Here is rumor of Aswin's return, but are cautious.
Speaker: The story explores themes of blind obedience, faithlessness, and willing ignorance.
Speaker: Shift deceives Narnians, leading to tragic consequences.
Speaker: Tryon and Jewel confront Shift.
Speaker: Who's Shift again?
Speaker: The monkey?
Speaker: Dude, I don't know.
Speaker: I'm just like, I'm like at the first paragraph writing down all the characters.
Speaker: Yeah, shift is the eighth.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: The eighth shift leading to tragic consequences.
Speaker: Try and Jule confront shift, owing to be captured and bound.
Speaker: Shift lies, escalate, and many Narnians believe him, even as their actions believe increasingly unjust.
Speaker: Aslan is presented and chaos ensues.
Speaker: The story showcases the dangers of blindly following authority and the erosion of faith due to manipulation and selfishness.
Speaker: Yo, this would have been a fun book to read.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Sounds confusing.
Speaker: Trelin and his allies rally against Jeff's lies, but the battle turns grim.
Speaker: Aslan's true country is revealed, empathizing the importance of faith and goodness.
Speaker: Characters like Emmeth, like Cowerman.
Speaker: Okay, Emmeth is just not good.
Speaker: Unless you want to be Emmeth.
Speaker: I'm not talking about Emmeth.
Speaker: He's bullshit.
Speaker: What's Emmeth?
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: It just says characters like Emmett, a cowherman, cowherman, whoever cowherman.
Speaker: He's fucking important.
Speaker: He's like one person in like, you know how like there's an invading army of blah.
Speaker: He's like the one person in blah that you can focus.
Speaker: You know, he's like the fucking Father Gilligan during the Black Death.
Speaker: Like he's an important character.
Speaker: Okay, yeah, he's rewarded for their genuine virtues despite early allegiances.
Speaker: The narrative underscores the idea of continuously seeking a deeper connection with a higher power and striving for moral growth.
Speaker: Ultimately, the world ends.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: Okay, that was another oh, no, Lucas.
Speaker: Leading characters into Aslan's country, symbolizing a heavenly afterlife.
Speaker: What the fuck is a unicorn companion?
Speaker: The message encourages readers to persevere in their spiritual journey moving further up and further in, suggesting an ongoing pursuit of understanding faith and goodness.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Hell yeah.
Speaker: You hear rumors of Aslan's return, but are cautious.
Speaker: The story, yeah, blind obedience, faithlessness.
Speaker: Okay, so essentially, the donkey puzzle was manipulated by an ape named Shift.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: Yeah, the donkey puzzle got screwed by Shift, and Shift murdered everybody.
Speaker: Oh, Shift murdered everyone?
Speaker: I thought Shift manipulated Puzzle into wearing Aslan skin and then calling war on the Calormans.
Speaker: Oh, no.
Speaker: I thought Shift was like Jafar.
Speaker: It...
Speaker: Aladdin where yeah shift was like all evil and then he like presented like a fake Aslan or a fake try-in or something yeah but he manipulated he manipulated puzzle into wearing Aslan a lion skin to being like to being like the Aslan yeah exactly because like Aslan's like Jesus in the Narnia universe right
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Well, let's try to start a scene.
Speaker: Hold on.
Speaker: Hold on.
Speaker: I'm not done.
Speaker: A unicorn companion.
Speaker: Rumors of Aslan's return.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I'm starting to put this story together.
Speaker: put together what's happening.
Speaker: Is this like the final book in the Narnia series?
Speaker: Why does it end on a stupid cliffhanger?
Speaker: Because it ends in heaven.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Narnians leading to tragic consequences confront Shift only to be captured and bound.
Speaker: Shift lies escalate and many Narnians believe him even as their actions become increasingly unjust.
Speaker: False Aslan.
Speaker: Yeah, false Aslan's presented.
Speaker: That's fucking puzzle.
Speaker: And chaos in 2's.
Speaker: The story showcases...
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Did Aslan get murdered?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Yeah, I don't know.
Speaker: I think Aslan died of natural causes.
Speaker: He just went to heaven.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: True country revealed, emphasizing the importance of faith and goodness.
Speaker: Characters like Emeth.
Speaker: Okay, Emeth.
Speaker: I'm fucking... I'm like this.
Speaker: You're Emeth?
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah, I'm like Team Emeth.
Speaker: Let's go.
Speaker: narrative underscores the idea of continuously seeking a deeper connection with the higher power ultimately the world ends the world ends shit what the fuck are we gonna do the world ends now okay great continue the story yeah it's like the saw narrative where you thought jigsaw died
Speaker: Okay, so what if... Okay, okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I think... So I'm puzzle.
Speaker: I want to be puzzle-started, and I'm wearing Aswin's... I'm wearing Aswin's fake skin like a cloak.
Speaker: And I'm... Me and you... You can be like Emmett.
Speaker: We're just in white nothingness.
Speaker: And I'm like, oh yeah, Emmett.
Speaker: We sure...
Speaker: made the world end and uh i don't know what do you think of my dope new robe okay can i add something to that yeah of course what if we're in the white void right yeah and what if we're like in a saw trap okay oh yeah what type of trap
Speaker: I'm thinking Saw 1, right?
Speaker: I'm thinking like... I'm thinking Emmett and Puzzle are teenagers and there's a cell phone on a table that's ringing and if you pick it up, whatever you pick up explodes.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: No, that's not a sawtrap.
Speaker: How is that supposed to make you feel good about, like, how is escaping that?
Speaker: Oh, dude, come on.
Speaker: That's like, that's like, so, okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: We can do this.
Speaker: We can do this.
Speaker: Let's make this like really fleshed out, right?
Speaker: Let's really flesh this out.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So Puzzle is a donkey wearing lion skin who's been manipulated by Shift, right?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So what if now he needs to learn?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So now what if Puzzle needs to learn the value of being able to stand up for yourself and not being manipulated by others?
Speaker: So can we come up with a trap?
Speaker: that way what if like what if like jigsaw is almost always like uh yeah a puzzle you gotta um you gotta i don't know puzzle's a donkey so it could be like hey puzzle if you can stand on two legs you escape
Speaker: no puzzle needs to like yeah yeah there's an open door puzzle you need to walk on two legs to escape yeah but puzzle doesn't know he could just like walk out on four legs he also doesn't know that his name is puzzle while he solved the puzzle that's the puzzle um yeah they're like here's the puzzle and he's like i'm so confused
Speaker: And then Emeth is in the same room, right?
Speaker: Emeth was given awards for his genuine virtues despite earlier allegiances, right?
Speaker: Yeah, so he used to be evil.
Speaker: So Emeth is like a reformed... Evil.
Speaker: Yeah, like reformed afar.
Speaker: How the fuck are you supposed to put this person in a saw trap?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Fucking...
Speaker: Oh, I know.
Speaker: I was going to say Emeth is riding Puzzle.
Speaker: And in order for Puzzle to get out the door, he has to kick Emeth off his back.
Speaker: But that's a learning for Puzzle, not for Emeth.
Speaker: Yeah, in this scenario, Emeth is just dead weight.
Speaker: No, but I was thinking, what if Emmett's biggest problem here was the thing that he had to overcome was not having to step in.
Speaker: He had to let Puzzle figure it out on his own.
Speaker: Because genuine virtues, right?
Speaker: He'd want to help Puzzle be like, hey man, two legs.
Speaker: You can just go on four legs.
Speaker: But what if his Sawtrap is like, no, I gotta...
Speaker: I gotta stay I gotta shut up so I feel like he's just in like a glass box and the glass box has like holes in it but like every time he like utters any help one of the glass holes close and if he like utters too much help then like he like can't breathe dude that's awesome that's awesome puzzles in a glass box
Speaker: No, Emmett is a glass box.
Speaker: Okay, every time he says something like the hole, dude, let's make it like a finite number of holes.
Speaker: Let's make it like five holes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, five holes, and we're in the white void, and we have Puzzle's a donkey wearing a lion skin, and he's trying to go through this door, and then the voice of Shift is just the voice of ominous death voice, and then you have Evita the box.
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: Let's do it.
Speaker: Okay, you want to be Puzzle or Emmeth?
Speaker: Okay, I'll be Puzzle.
Speaker: I'll be Emmeth because I have to speak less.
Speaker: Okay, you want to speak less.
Speaker: Okay, but you could also be Shift.
Speaker: Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Speaker: All right, all right, I'll be Shift.
Speaker: Are you ready?
Speaker: Are you ready?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: All right, Interior, White, Void.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Time unknown.
Speaker: Puzzle wakes up and everything on his body hurts.
Speaker: And Puzzle, I don't know what noises Ducky makes.
Speaker: Hee-haw!
Speaker: How the fuck do you not know that that's the noise Ducky makes?
Speaker: What do you think?
Speaker: Is your idea of like a donkey confined to Eeyore?
Speaker: That's a horse, Lucas.
Speaker: Pustle wakes up and says, nay, and then clears his throat and starts talking.
Speaker: And he's like, where the fuck am I?
Speaker: And then Emeth just wakes up and goes, and then a hole closes.
Speaker: Oh my god, boreholes.
Speaker: And Puzzle runs over to Emeth and just starts bashing his head into the glass.
Speaker: Puzzle's real.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Puzzle's just going at it.
Speaker: And then, Emeth, would you stop doing that?
Speaker: And then a voice comes out.
Speaker: Puzzled by what's going on.
Speaker: A voice comes out on the speaker.
Speaker: I want to play a game.
Speaker: Puzzle goes, nay.
Speaker: Nay game.
Speaker: Nay game.
Speaker: Emeth, for your great virtuosity.
Speaker: You have been trapped in a glass box.
Speaker: I don't know why he's Sean Connery for some reason.
Speaker: You've been trapped in a glass box.
Speaker: Sean Connery needed the money from playing the gig.
Speaker: Yeah, he's been doing not well for himself.
Speaker: Yeah, his kids' bond money dried up.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: League of Extraordinary Gentlemen money dried up.
Speaker: He got sued for a week of extraordinary gentlemen.
Speaker: Sure, why not?
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I wanted to like, I almost wanted to go like, no, it's a parallel universe, but that movie made a fuck ton of money.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then Puzzle yells out at the voice that stopped.
Speaker: He's like, glass box of what?
Speaker: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: With holes and every time, Emmeth, you try to help or speak.
Speaker: A hole will close up, limiting your oxygen supply.
Speaker: And then Puzzle yells, what about that wardrobe with the doors open over there?
Speaker: That was the second book.
Speaker: This is the fifth.
Speaker: Oh, wait.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: But there's actually a door open.
Speaker: That's right.
Speaker: Oh, my bad.
Speaker: I didn't know what you were talking about earlier.
Speaker: That is the way out for both of you.
Speaker: Puzzles.
Speaker: If you are able to walk out on your two back legs or your front ones, if you're feeling ambitious.
Speaker: You can leave and the glass box will open, securing your life in Aswin's country.
Speaker: Which is their heaven, essentially.
Speaker: Puzzle was zoning out and just kept hitting his head on the glass box.
Speaker: Puzzle, would you stop that?
Speaker: Two holes.
Speaker: Puzzle.
Speaker: So now Puzzle tries sticking his tongue in one of the halls.
Speaker: I feel like I'm in a saw trap right now.
Speaker: He's trying to eat the way out.
Speaker: Okay, so Emeth takes Puzzle's tongue from the hole.
Speaker: Pulls his tongue.
Speaker: Doesn't say a word, but just goes...
Speaker: takes his finger and points back towards his mouth.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And goes, and then, and then let's go of the tongue, hits the nose like, like that.
Speaker: And just points at the door.
Speaker: Oh yeah.
Speaker: So like when you unleash a measuring tape and it like comes in, it smacks you in the hand.
Speaker: That's like the tug.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: And then Emmeth looks over at the door, takes his two fingers down, and goes, tip-top, tip-top, tip-top.
Speaker: So, puzzle...
Speaker: is dazed because his tongue just hit him in his eye.
Speaker: He starts stumbling towards the wardrobe and like, um, he's stumbling because the lion skin keeps like covering his eyes and he keeps like getting his hoofs caught in the legs.
Speaker: Then Puzzle the whole time is wishing that his unicorn friend Jewel was here.
Speaker: But he's very depressed that Jewel's not in the void.
Speaker: So he starts crying.
Speaker: Okay, next scene.
Speaker: I want to now pick up a scene with King Tyrion.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And the unicorn Jewel.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And they're just like chilling.
Speaker: They're hanging out in Aslan's country, right?
Speaker: Both of them have like the great people.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I want to be Jewel.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I'll be Tyrion.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Jule, those grapes on your horn sure look delicious.
Speaker: Hee-haw!
Speaker: Tarion steals Jule's grapes.
Speaker: I meant what?
Speaker: Why are you doing this?
Speaker: We have unlimited supply of grapes.
Speaker: We're in literal heaven right now.
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: Yeah, my version of heaven is torturing you, Jewel.
Speaker: This is I'm an evil king, Tarion.
Speaker: My name literally has tyranny in it.
Speaker: Jules takes his hooves and brandishes it against his horn.
Speaker: And as soon as the hooves reaches the tip of the horn, a whole pack of grapes fall out of the sparkles.
Speaker: I feel like when Jewel is like, Jewel's like sharpening the horn.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And then makes it appear.
Speaker: Yep, yep.
Speaker: And then like a grape, I'm guessing like the entire bunch of grapes like appears while sharpening the horn.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: So now just like swimming in grapes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: No, no, no.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Pretty much.
Speaker: Pretty much.
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: Now we all have grapes.
Speaker: And then he just goes, chomp, chomp, chomp.
Speaker: And Tyrion goes, yeah, well, you might have grapes, but your buddy Puzzle is crying in his own tears.
Speaker: And Puzzle pulls up one of those old, like, portable DVD players and
Speaker: What?
Speaker: Like really outdated tech.
Speaker: He pulls out.
Speaker: Wait, is Puzzle in the scene?
Speaker: No, Puzzle's like hidden in a different room, right?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But Tyrion's going to show Juel the room.
Speaker: Oh, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
Speaker: Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker: So Tyrion...
Speaker: posts out an old dvd player and like hits it a couple times to make it work and then you can see like a grainy video of puzzle just like crying in a lion skin jewel looks at that and goes i've never seen that man in my life before
Speaker: And Tyrion goes, oh, really?
Speaker: And reaches into Jules' pocket, pulls out his wallet, and shows Jules a picture of Puzzle and Jules in Jules' wallet.
Speaker: What?
Speaker: How did you get these?
Speaker: How did you know that this was the hair?
Speaker: What?
Speaker: Everyone know donkeys and unicorns are best friends and questionable lovers.
Speaker: Nay.
Speaker: You know, like, sometimes when you're a little nervous and you've been caught in a lie, your throat seizes up a little?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That happens to Jules, and while his throat seizes up, he wants to say, oh, no, but instead he just ends up going, ee-haw!
Speaker: Eee-haw!
Speaker: And Tyrion grabs Jules and tries to do the Heimlich maneuver, but instead just breaks a few ribs.
Speaker: But they're in Aslan's country, so the ribs fix back up immediately.
Speaker: And the ribs sprout another person.
Speaker: Okay, okay, who's this person?
Speaker: Who's this person?
Speaker: Who's the new... What other characters?
Speaker: Oh, Tyrion led the kingdom of loyal Narnians.
Speaker: It's just got to be a random Narnian.
Speaker: Yeah, just a random Narnian.
Speaker: And the Narnian's name is Narn.
Speaker: Narn.
Speaker: Narn the Narnian.
Speaker: Narn shows up and says, I like grapes.
Speaker: I imagine Narn should look a lot like, you know, the little lad who loves berries and creams.
Speaker: Oh, like the serial character?
Speaker: Yeah, sure.
Speaker: Like that kid, you know, like a little shorter side with a little bit of an eccentric sort of style.
Speaker: Okay, yeah.
Speaker: So that's Narn, short, lumpy dude.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: You know how in Shrek, I think, Forever After, there's that character who's like, do the roar.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: That's Narn.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Maybe Narn doesn't say I like grapes.
Speaker: I feel like Narn would not say that.
Speaker: I like grapes.
Speaker: Works.
Speaker: Works.
Speaker: And then Tyrion Tyrion's like oh my god Jule like look look what you created but I feel like Jule's like proud of his creation.
Speaker: As Narn just does like a swan dive and Olympic divers dive into the sea of grapes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And like
Speaker: Narn takes like when he dove up and then dives down he like took the DVD player with him.
Speaker: Oh.
Speaker: Tyrion just yells I need that to torment Yule about Puzzle.
Speaker: And then I feel like we cut back to the other scene.
Speaker: Okay okay cut back to the because I was going to cut to shift but okay we'll cut back to the other scene.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And then it's just going to talk in that scene or.
Speaker: No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: You cut.
Speaker: Let's cut back to the glass box.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Glass box and puzzles crying so much that like, like puddles and like the water level is raising in the room.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: How high are we talking?
Speaker: How much is the water level right now?
Speaker: So it's like two feet and Puzzle's only like four feet tall.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And then the glass box...
Speaker: has two holes yeah emeth has two holes and one's at like three feet and the other holes that like exactly like one inch taller than puzzles like then puzzle is tall okay okay so emeth is just sitting there watching this happening and
Speaker: He's like, he's, you know, pacing back and forth and he's going, and then he thinks about it and he goes, oh, in his head, he's like, oh shit, I just have two holes left.
Speaker: So that means I can say one thing.
Speaker: I need to say one thing.
Speaker: Or maybe I can make two noises and just die.
Speaker: But Emmett goes, no, I'm a virtuous man.
Speaker: I need to get this donkey out of here.
Speaker: Does he do this in his head?
Speaker: I hope otherwise he just lost his hole.
Speaker: No, no, it's all in his head.
Speaker: It's all in his head.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: No, I need to help this because I'm a virtuous person.
Speaker: Donkey, walk out of here.
Speaker: One hole.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And so Puzzle starts, like, crying even more because he saw Evan's hole close up.
Speaker: And Puzzle's very confused while the water, like, keeps rising.
Speaker: And because the water keeps rising, he's even crying, like, even more.
Speaker: So it's, like, fast filling up.
Speaker: And, like...
Speaker: It's about to cover Puzzle's nose when Puzzle starts to float.
Speaker: What direction is he floating in?
Speaker: He's floating back towards the glass box.
Speaker: The water is slowly starting to just nick the last hole.
Speaker: The water is just barely going into the glass box.
Speaker: Emeth is just standing there like, God fucking damn it.
Speaker: How do I do this?
Speaker: Is Puzzle anywhere near the hole in the glass box?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Puzzle's made it to the hole in the glass box and is just sticking his eye and trying to communicate sadness and longing to help to Emeth with his eyes.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So, so Emmett first tries to look at puzzles with his eyes and goes, Hey man, through his eyes, just try to communicate this through the side, through his eyes.
Speaker: Please just go out through that door.
Speaker: Just walk out that door.
Speaker: Just do it.
Speaker: Just walk out that door on your own, man.
Speaker: Come on.
Speaker: Communicating it through his eyes.
Speaker: Does anything happen?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Uh,
Speaker: Puzzle feels invigorated and he like takes off the fake lions.
Speaker: Yes!
Speaker: That's a win!
Speaker: Fuck yeah!
Speaker: Takes off the fake lions and slowly starts pushing the hide into the glass box through the one hole.
Speaker: Hide?
Speaker: Like the lion's lion's skit.
Speaker: He starts giving it to Evan and he's communicating with his eyes as like, remember me.
Speaker: to do here just swim out just swim the fuck out the final hole closes i feel when the hole closes it's got like the lion's hide is like stuck like like it's closed but the lion's hide is like half it and half out
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So is it like closed around the hide or like?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So like the glass box formed around the hide, which is half in and half out.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And Puzzle is crying so much, he's now swimming, and the glass box starts floating.
Speaker: I want to cut to the chamber where Shift is running all of this.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And he's watching this on, like, multiple camera feeds.
Speaker: And then he just goes...
Speaker: Narn and the box or is he just watching the box just the box just the box okay yeah yeah because like I imagine that that this contraption because like uh Tyrion has access to it on a dvd player I imagine it's like a coliseum sort of thing yeah you know yeah exactly so so shift is like shift is just there huh that's a cool idea and just writes it down in a notebook yeah
Speaker: And now it cuts back to the inside the room.
Speaker: And Puzzle grabs the lion's hide and starts trying to swim towards the wardrobe with the box and is trying to bring the box himself and Emmett in the box and
Speaker: out of the wardrobe.
Speaker: Oh my god.
Speaker: Oh my god.
Speaker: Is he gonna do it?
Speaker: Is he gonna do it?
Speaker: Emeth is just like in the vacuum sealed box just going is he gonna do it?
Speaker: Because he can speak as much as he wants now.
Speaker: Is he like, come on, you got this.
Speaker: You got this puzzle.
Speaker: The more he speaks, the less oxygen he has.
Speaker: Yeah, but it's not like he has less oxygen in like a second.
Speaker: And then I feel like...
Speaker: feel like we go back to try it and jewel and a Narn and like,
Speaker: Narn pops up out the graves with the DVD player and we see this suspenseful pull towards the wardrobe.
Speaker: I was going to say, what if Narn, Tyrion, and Jules' bellies are way more inflated now than they were earlier?
Speaker: From all the grapes?
Speaker: Yeah, because now there's just a few grapes left.
Speaker: And they're just sitting on the ground with the little DVD player in the middle.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: So Tarion's and Jules' strategy to find Narn was just to eat all the grapes.
Speaker: Yeah, pretty much.
Speaker: And they're just like lounging out watching the DVD player while like suspenseful music plays.
Speaker: They can barely move.
Speaker: They're just like... They're just like in the back of the weight of all the grapes.
Speaker: Oh my god.
Speaker: And then...
Speaker: And then cut back and Puzzle gets Puzzle gets to the wardrobe and Emmet is like Emmet is in the glass box still and Puzzle is like trying to now he's behind the glass box and he's trying to like push his head against the box to like get the box through the wardrobe first.
Speaker: Oh, selfless donkey.
Speaker: But Emeth is like knocking on the side because he's a virtuous man.
Speaker: He wants puzzles to go in first.
Speaker: He's like knocking on the side that puzzles is on.
Speaker: He goes, knock, knock, knock, knock.
Speaker: No, you...
Speaker: No, you.
Speaker: I'll come.
Speaker: No, you.
Speaker: So then Puzzle, like, swims back to the lion hide, and he grabs it by his teeth, and then he, like, leans backwards, and, like, his bottom donkey hoofs are on the box, which are still in the room, and the top half of him is, like, leading through the wardrobe into, like, an unknown void.
Speaker: emeth is just like yeah puzzles yeah do it fuck yeah let's go i feel like emeth would like grab the other end of the lion hide why oh okay maintain himself to like make sure he's like in one plane so he's just like barely holding on with like his upper body
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Like, Puzzle has it, like, in his mouth.
Speaker: And then, like, Puzzle's, like, mostly in the void.
Speaker: And then still his hooves are in the glass box realm.
Speaker: And, like, Emmett has the, like, the lion hide is stuck in the box.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, for sure, for sure.
Speaker: And he's leaning back and a crack in the box starts to form.
Speaker: And then I feel like we would cut to shift.
Speaker: Okay, okay.
Speaker: So Shift is just sitting there watching all this.
Speaker: I imagine Shift has packets of Doritos and Mountain Dew lying around, you know?
Speaker: And a little notebook.
Speaker: He's just watching it.
Speaker: And he's smoking a fat blunt.
Speaker: Sure, why not?
Speaker: And he's watching all this happen and then suddenly as soon as a crack appears he's like, huh?
Speaker: No, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: This wasn't supposed to happen.
Speaker: And he kicks his microphone and goes, Shift and Emmet.
Speaker: Do not crack the box.
Speaker: You mean puzzle in Emmet.
Speaker: In which Jeffree is referring to himself.
Speaker: Puzzle in Emmet.
Speaker: Do not crack the box.
Speaker: And it starts cracking, but the lion hide is ripping at the same time.
Speaker: So is the lion hide the thing that's cracking the box?
Speaker: Yeah, but it's also ripping.
Speaker: So like if it rips, Puzzle will go free.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But like if the box cracks, maybe both of them go free.
Speaker: Okay, okay.
Speaker: So what if now Emeth then just stops pulling on the lion hide and then just starts like hitting the cracks with his bare hands to the point where like his hands start getting like bloody and stuff.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then... Just like runs back to the back of the glass box, runs up forward and just hits himself on the crack.
Speaker: I feel like it'd be one of those dramatic, like where you're running through a skyscraper and you jump out the window.
Speaker: I feel like Emmett jumps through the box.
Speaker: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Okay, so he, in like, fifth attempt, shoulders broken, like, it's all dislocated, he's all fucking wounded and everything.
Speaker: You know, purple everywhere.
Speaker: Does his final run, like, I could do this all day, right?
Speaker: Dramatic run, hits himself against the box, against the crack, and crack.
Speaker: the box comes open and emeth is free puzzles is is jolted out of the door with like the the release of pressure and and emeth is just like now in the water okay yeah so puzzles like drifted into the void yeah and emeth is like stuck at the water and like is the wardrobe door still open or did that like slam shut
Speaker: I think it's still open.
Speaker: I think shift is like figuring out which button to use to slam the door shut, right?
Speaker: But he's like pressing different buttons and different things are happening in the room.
Speaker: So like he presses a button, suddenly they're like disco lights.
Speaker: Yeah, like a strobe light or like a lava lamp comes down.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: Like he's pressing another one and then there's like Steve Martin's music starts playing or something.
Speaker: And if we cut to Jewel and Triunth and Narn, Narn's like up yelling like, go, go, go.
Speaker: And Jewel and Triun are like asleep.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Narn is, go, go, go.
Speaker: And then back to Emeth.
Speaker: Okay, back to Emeth.
Speaker: Emeth finally escapes.
Speaker: Shift finds the right button.
Speaker: The door starts closing, but very slowly due to the weight of the water.
Speaker: And Emeth finds the tiniest gap and escapes.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Then Emeth also goes into the void.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: End episode.
Speaker: No, no, no, no, not yet, not yet.
Speaker: She goes, ah, damn!
Speaker: And then we cut back to Narn, Jules, and Tririon, where Jules is like, yeah!
Speaker: Sorry, Narn is like, yeah!
Speaker: And then suddenly you see, like, a wet-ass donkey dripping with water walk from, like, the left side of the frame into this, and then there's, like, a beaten, battered, wet Emeth, like...
Speaker: Motherfucker.
Speaker: End of episode.
Speaker: Do the outro, Andy.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: This is the outro, and I don't know what to say right now, but this is the outro.
Speaker: Please subscribe.
Speaker: Hell yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Remember, we're bringing you the stories that the authors don't want you to know.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I was trying to make it something memorable for the outro.
Speaker: I don't fucking know, dude.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Now you're overthinking it.
Speaker: You're just gonna be like, outro time.
Speaker: Thank you for listening to the stories authors are too lazy to write.
Speaker: That was... The outro?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Wait, which part of this is the outro?
Speaker: I don't understand.
Speaker: I don't understand.
Speaker: I don't understand.
Speaker: Is this the outro?
Speaker: Is this the ending?
Speaker: Everything is an ending, Andy.
Speaker: All beginnings are endings.
Speaker: We could just play the intro for the outro.
Speaker: Welcome to the podcast.
Speaker: Congratulations, you're now on our next episode.
Speaker: We just don't have an outro.
Speaker: Say nice things about us online.
Speaker: And if you don't want to say nice things about us online, then give it to your friends so at least we can boost that engagement.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Share.
Speaker: Do things.
Speaker: Hell yeah.
Speaker: Sweet.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: I think we're good for the... Oh my god!
Speaker: Thank you for listening to episode one of Cliff Notes Continued.
Speaker: We'll be back with episode two on Tuesday, December 19th with a whole new book and a whole new story.
