Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger, a podcast dedicated to delving into unexpected conversations with a diverse range of guests.
Speaker: I'm your host, Eric Bigger, and I'm joining you each week to create an authentic space of dialogue about the subcultures of American life.
Speaker: Through engaging discussions with writers, actors, experts, and influencers, we will explore the strength of diversity and the transformational power of vulnerability.
Speaker: So let's dive in and discover the unexpected together on Bigger Talks.
Speaker: Bigger Talks, Bigger Talks.
Speaker: Back again in another episode.
Speaker: And today, listen, people, it's going to be magical.
Speaker: It's going to be miracles.
Speaker: And I have the phenomenal lady, lovely Mary Caroline Cruz.
Speaker: She's the heel optimist.
Speaker: She does crystal guidance.
Speaker: You're not the healing.
Speaker: She does it all.
Speaker: We're going to talk about the art of forgiveness, the happy human experience, and her journey of being her highest, best self in this longing.
Speaker: Mary, welcome to Bigger Talks Podcast.
Speaker: How are you?
Speaker: Oh my gosh, Eric, thank you so much for having me.
Speaker: Super, super grateful for you and this opportunity to have bigger talks with you.
Speaker: I'm excited.
Speaker: How are you?
Speaker: It's been a while.
Speaker: I'm happy to have your energy on this platform because you have so much to offer and your light is shining bright.
Speaker: And we were talking before the episode about your bio and your journey.
Speaker: And I think the first thing that stood out to me was,
Speaker: Your name, Mary Caroline Brewers.
Speaker: I'm like, so what name do you go by?
Speaker: So to the people listening, give them a synopsis of like who you are, where you are today.
Speaker: And let's tap into the vibration of you.
Speaker: Well, I am Mary Caroline Cruz.
Speaker: And I just recently in my self-realization and healing journey, I've accepted who I am fully.
Speaker: So I went from Mary Cruz to accepting who I am, Mary Caroline Cruz.
Speaker: It's been a journey.
Speaker: I'm Filipino.
Speaker: So I was born in the Philippines.
Speaker: I came when I was eight.
Speaker: That was the whole transition for me.
Speaker: And then even just being Filipino in general, there's a lot of decolonization happening there.
Speaker: So pretty much lost myself in the process of being here in the United States.
Speaker: And then I
Speaker: Lost myself spiritually and who I am in my inside, like, you know, my inner sense, my truth.
Speaker: And then broke in a couple of times, broke into where I'm just like, didn't know who I was.
Speaker: That's when I started seeking to feel better about myself because I've always known as all of it that I'm like, you know what?
Speaker: I'm special.
Speaker: There's something about me that I need to remember that I lost as a child.
Speaker: And then all of that.
Speaker: And then to hear,
Speaker: Now, I started my awakening in my mid-20s, and that was a journey of awakening, then kind of like pushing it back, then being broken again.
Speaker: And then now it's just like, all right, no more messing around.
Speaker: I am going to show up for myself, and it's going to be a dedication and self-love journey of healing and, yeah, all of that stuff.
Speaker: Yeah, I love that.
Speaker: Self-healing, self-love, you know, you claim you were special.
Speaker: But you used some words that stood out to me, and I want you to give the audience, people listening, context of loss, right?
Speaker: Context of broken, context of awakening, right?
Speaker: What was loss?
Speaker: What was broken?
Speaker: And what did you awake in your journey?
Speaker: I lost who I was in my highest self, like who I came here and birthed into earth as being.
Speaker: Lost who, I mean, there's so many layers of that, Erin.
Speaker: So who were you before, before the loss?
Speaker: What like paradigm were you in?
Speaker: What frequency were you in the matrix?
Speaker: Like, were you just clueless?
Speaker: Were you just all ego?
Speaker: Like, who were you before all this took place?
Speaker: Ego is not a bad thing.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: But it was more of like the shame that came in growing up.
Speaker: Are you trying to make me emotional?
Speaker: I'm trying to make people just let go and release so we can get that peace to come through.
Speaker: I lost who I am, which is a really beautiful, open-hearted person that wore her on her sleeve that got teased for being sensitive.
Speaker: All of it.
Speaker: Who I truly am that made me happy, made me special.
Speaker: And I forgot all of that because then I started having the matrix create this whole reality around me that being sensitive and loving people too hard and too fast is something that's bad because you can't trust people.
Speaker: When in reality, that was creating this matrix that I couldn't trust myself.
Speaker: I couldn't trust my intuition.
Speaker: I wasn't safe in my decisions when all of that was untrue.
Speaker: So that was the awakening in two.
Speaker: Really the transmutation of that matrix through forgiveness, which starts really the deepest part of it is forgiving self and everything and everyone else.
Speaker: And then in that forgiveness, releasing all of that energy, the matrix that was created, and then creating so much space to remember who I truly am, which is divine love.
Speaker: I am here to love, period.
Speaker: I am love.
Speaker: So that was the awakening and alchemization of it all on a really deep spiritual wholeness, higher self level.
Speaker: God is within me.
Speaker: I am God.
Speaker: You are God.
Speaker: All of that.
Speaker: But yeah, so that's what came out.
Speaker: Dennis, you know, it's beautiful because a lot of times we do get playing to be too sensitive as sensitive beings, whole beings, spiritual beings, all these things.
Speaker: I'm very sensitive.
Speaker: I can feel you growling.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: So thank you for sharing that vulnerability, that truth.
Speaker: And recently I discovered love is easy.
Speaker: Our minds make it hard.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You're a lover at heart.
Speaker: You're a lover from the soul.
Speaker: You are love.
Speaker: And that's what you came here to do.
Speaker: And for some reason, a matrix or the energies that were at work were trying to make you playing something else that like, no, I can be all these things.
Speaker: I can be sensitive.
Speaker: I can be emotional.
Speaker: I can be empathetic.
Speaker: I can be whatever I want to be.
Speaker: I choose to be.
Speaker: However, the world makes us forget we are.
Speaker: And it's all about their memory.
Speaker: And I'm so happy that you share those truths with us here because I want to go into the journey of the art of forgiveness and why forgiveness for you is powerful.
Speaker: Why forgiveness is powerful in the whole totality of the universe that we should know about or least understand.
Speaker: In totality, we are one.
Speaker: We literally are within each other.
Speaker: And the whole matrix part of it, right, the conditioning that started from birth, from our parents and our family to society and everything else, all of the human experience that is life, right?
Speaker: We continue to hurt each other in the fear and the conditioning of things that are untrue.
Speaker: So it like creates and creates and blockages and walls.
Speaker: And then on the journey of healing and wanting to heal yourself and feel better, because it's just, it's a lot to carry.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: To carry that energy of pain and trauma, the feeling of being hurt and not really seeing the truth of it all, which all of us are innocent.
Speaker: We're all literally walking each other home.
Speaker: We're all literally trying to find the truth in it all and make peace.
Speaker: and be happy as humans.
Speaker: And in the heart of the journey of healing is forgiveness.
Speaker: Forgiving yourself.
Speaker: You say that again?
Speaker: It was so powerful.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: What did you call it?
Speaker: The heart of healing is forgiveness.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: How did you get to that, Jim?
Speaker: I devoted without knowing I was going into a devoted five-year self-healing journey.
Speaker: It started in 2017, and then we all know what happened in 2020.
Speaker: And that gave me the opportunity to really dive into all of the things I kind of learned, like receiving Reiki healing, like working with crystals,
Speaker: learning about forgiveness stuff, right?
Speaker: But not really to when I learned how to do it myself.
Speaker: There really is like a recipe to that.
Speaker: So it was like taking all of the experience that I had from 2017, 18, 19, and in 2020, I
Speaker: I had nothing else to do, but journey inward was what I was called to do.
Speaker: And I showed up for it.
Speaker: And yeah, I started doing self-healing on myself, which in that process started bringing up trauma, like things and people that hurt me that I would just start bawling and crying.
Speaker: And I'm like, what do I do with this feeling?
Speaker: It's going to keep coming up.
Speaker: It's coming up because it's ready to be fazed.
Speaker: to be looked at, to be healed, forgiven, and released.
Speaker: Like I no longer wanted to carry it.
Speaker: And I didn't even know, again, I found out.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: So it was literally like all day, every day, doing the energy work, having things come up, forgiving everything and everyone else.
Speaker: And I would intuitively know like, okay, that was me.
Speaker: Like, you know, at the same time, I'm sorry.
Speaker: So I work in the quantum realms.
Speaker: There's no space.
Speaker: There's no time.
Speaker: I don't need to be in front of the person to ask them for forgiveness because energy truly is everything and it will reach them one way or the other.
Speaker: But at the same time, I'm not doing it for them.
Speaker: I'm doing it for me.
Speaker: So, yeah, I started asking for forgiveness to people that I know I hurt.
Speaker: I started receiving forgiveness from people that hurt me.
Speaker: And then I started to really forgive myself for everything.
Speaker: And in that process, I started to feel lighter.
Speaker: And also in the process of forgiveness, you start to see the truth of it all.
Speaker: Just as I asked for forgiveness for others because I was innocent.
Speaker: I wasn't trying to intentionally hurt someone or whatever the case is.
Speaker: I didn't know any better.
Speaker: And that makes us all innocent.
Speaker: In a sense, again, we're one.
Speaker: We're mirrors of each other.
Speaker: Forgiveness does make you feel lighter.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And you said a lot that makes so much sense.
Speaker: But the thing that stood out, you said 2020 was a year inward.
Speaker: However, whatever was coming up was pain drama.
Speaker: And whenever it comes up, it needs to be based.
Speaker: I've come up with the idea that if you can come up with an idea or intention that you believe in and it hasn't been executed, that means you can do it.
Speaker: It came to your spirit for a reason.
Speaker: So with the pain, with the trauma, when it comes up, it needs to be faced.
Speaker: And I was telling someone the other day, like she was talking about rage and I was like, that rage is not yours.
Speaker: You got to get rid of it.
Speaker: You're holding on to it.
Speaker: So for you, with the, is it uno poco?
Speaker: The whole thing.
Speaker: I love you please.
Speaker: I'm sorry.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Can you share with the listeners, what is some practical ways that we can heal ourselves from trauma we don't know about?
Speaker: Because some of us have been molested and taken advantage of at an age that we can't remember, or we know the feeling, but we don't know the moment, or we were blacked out, intoxicated, whatever.
Speaker: How do you, or what is the best way to
Speaker: for people to forgive someone and forgive themselves, that's practical, that's relatable, that's like, okay, I can do that right now if I want to receive this.
Speaker: Yeah, so literally that's what the Happy Human Experience book is going to be about.
Speaker: It's a really tangible way to be able to do the forgiveness practice, which is based.
Speaker: The roots of it is from indigenous Hawaiian practice of forgiveness called Ho'okunokun'o, which means to make right rights.
Speaker: It became popularized here, like, especially starting in 2020.
Speaker: And, like, I witnessed its dilution, in a sense, to this present moment.
Speaker: It's a beautiful practice that Hawaiians use to really, for family, like, they would have, like, forgiveness huts.
Speaker: When someone is literally like on their deathbed, they bring all of the family in.
Speaker: Like, let's say, oh, for example, this person that's ill is saying, you know what?
Speaker: My cousin stole my pencil when I was in third grade.
Speaker: That's my truth.
Speaker: Bring that cousin in kind of thing.
Speaker: Bring that cousin in and let's do that.
Speaker: I'm sorry, cousin.
Speaker: Forgive me for taking your pencil and for not admitting it.
Speaker: And then the cousin, th is is like in real life, right?
Speaker: Now I've like figured like,
Speaker: This is possible in the quantum realms.
Speaker: So then that cousin will literally, I forgive you.
Speaker: All is forgiven.
Speaker: And the cousin who took the pencil, thank you.
Speaker: I love you.
Speaker: We bring it back to love, right?
Speaker: Instead of like, they were hurt.
Speaker: I acknowledge you.
Speaker: So then the transportation, that pain lifts.
Speaker: And it heals the physical body because it can turn energy, hurt, and pain and trauma on an energetic level can turn into physical things like weight and illnesses and things like that.
Speaker: That's why I'm sure, I don't know if you've ever watched the movie, the documentary Heal.
Speaker: Yeah, one of my favorites.
Speaker: Okay, so you know, all those miracles of people like doing forgiveness with like even people that have transitioned and them miraculously coming out of their deathbed because they talked to their parents who already transitioned and they found out the truth like nothing's wrong.
Speaker: I love you.
Speaker: I've always loved you.
Speaker: And that would heal them like that.
Speaker: So yeah.
Speaker: We just opened up a whole new portal and I'm just getting some downloads.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: So hold up.
Speaker: So let me ask you a question.
Speaker: So do you think from your perspective and experience and from your higher self, do you believe forgiveness is an ill and medicine?
Speaker: 1,000%, it's the most potent of all of it.
Speaker: Because forgiveness, first of all, is shamed on.
Speaker: A lot of people think to forgive means it makes the person, what the person did to them, okay.
Speaker: When that's not the truth at all.
Speaker: The truth is, you no longer wanna carry that pain.
Speaker: You don't want to carry that on your heart.
Speaker: Burden doesn't have anything to do with the other person.
Speaker: All about you.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: And when you get to see that truth and release it, that's healing.
Speaker: Yeah, so do you also think that, and this is a little deeper, loaded question, but I just want to just take it there because this one came to mind.
Speaker: Anyone who has mental illness, physical illness, sick or anything in the body or the mind, do you think it's because somewhere in their current life or maybe their past life, they haven't forgave someone or something and that's why the energy is present in that form?
Speaker: Does that make sense?
Speaker: That does.
Speaker: I mean, that's really deep because there's so many reasons and everyone's different and everyone's on a different trajectory, a different journey, different traumas, different karmas to be healed.
Speaker: There's so many things that is possible with that.
Speaker: And the only thing that I can tell you
Speaker: is you start with self.
Speaker: Just like I've witnessed myself forgive my mom for things that, and I found out she was so innocent in that, forgave my dad, and saw his innocence in it, and literally, energetically, they shifted.
Speaker: And my relationship with them has healed with me doing me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And you don't have to worry about the other person, even if it's your parents, right?
Speaker: When you do your own healing work, it does, it heals you, it clears you, and that energy is connected with the other person and it helps them too without even knowing it.
Speaker: That's what's so beautiful.
Speaker: So beautiful that you say that because it is for you and it blares your energy still.
Speaker: So last year, you know, experiencing a dark night of the soul was tough, right?
Speaker: I was praying so much, but I knew about forgiveness.
Speaker: So I started to like forgive people, forgive myself.
Speaker: Then I'm like, okay, cool.
Speaker: But then I got testified in it when I was doing it every day.
Speaker: And it was so interesting.
Speaker: I was doing like three straight days, like early in the morning, midday.
Speaker: I kept doing it with the same person and myself.
Speaker: I was telling my cousin, I was like, oh man, I'm just forgiving.
Speaker: But I didn't understand what I was saying at the time, but I just know I felt different.
Speaker: But you're confirming that experience that forgiveness is a healing medicine.
Speaker: It is a healing weapon.
Speaker: to release yourself from fears and worries of things that you might have done or didn't do or things people have done to you.
Speaker: It's so special that the art of forgiveness is the way to heal ourselves, to heal others, to heal the universe.
Speaker: That's tangible.
Speaker: But at the same time, I've spoken to so many people where I'll tell them, like, you need to forgive that, you know, or to do this, let that go.
Speaker: And across the board, everyone wants to forgive.
Speaker: But...
Speaker: How do you forgive?
Speaker: And it's not easy.
Speaker: You know, anything is what I got, which is why I was inspired to pretty much take the heal alchemy process, which contains three pillars of energy work, forgiveness and consciousness.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But the bottom line, the entire process of learning that it's to become a happy human.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then in the heart of it is the forgiveness, which is what a lot of people, it's easy to do that, right?
Speaker: Like, do you want to be a happy person?
Speaker: Yes, that's so normal to say, right?
Speaker: I want to be happy.
Speaker: I want to forgive.
Speaker: So what I'm getting from people is they want to learn how to forgive because it is hard to do forgiveness, especially when you feel the hurt and the pain and the trauma and whatever that happened to you in the past.
Speaker: I love this.
Speaker: I love this.
Speaker: It's right on point.
Speaker: So the question is, or what I'm thinking is that, why is it hard for people to hear?
Speaker: Why do you think?
Speaker: I know my reason, but I would love to know your reason.
Speaker: Honestly, a lot of people don't even know they have to or they have anything to do.
Speaker: They're not awake to that.
Speaker: They don't have that self-realization yet.
Speaker: Then the guidance, that's hard.
Speaker: There's social media.
Speaker: There's so much text and information that's getting out there, but there's also so much dilution that's happening.
Speaker: Yeah, that's all I'm going to touch on on that part because everyone's on their journey.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: And I respect everyone and their processes and everything.
Speaker: Yeah, so can we run over the script of how to heal yourself?
Speaker: So I want to give you a scenario, the listeners, a scenario.
Speaker: It's relatable, I would say, to most people.
Speaker: So say, for instance, you're on a fitness journey.
Speaker: You want to get in shape.
Speaker: You want to lose weight or you just want to do the right thing and say your challenge is your diet, right?
Speaker: Go to the gym.
Speaker: You can get up on time.
Speaker: So you're out at an event.
Speaker: Gives you something that you probably wouldn't eat.
Speaker: Let's say someone gives you a donut, right?
Speaker: You eat the donut.
Speaker: But while you're eating, you're thinking about like, I was on this diet.
Speaker: So make a long story short, the night's over, you go home.
Speaker: Now you feel shame.
Speaker: Now you feel killed.
Speaker: Now you're afraid to talk to your coach or your trainer, right?
Speaker: Now you're carrying all that energy.
Speaker: For someone out there, someone listening that has just done that, doing that, what is the script to run by for them to eat this energy off of them?
Speaker: Because something that we got to forgive ourselves.
Speaker: Well, that's another thing, right?
Speaker: First of all, I'm going to tell you something to where you don't even need to feel bad.
Speaker: That's the thing.
Speaker: You have the coach and yourself that created this matrix that it's bad for you to eat that donut.
Speaker: You need to understand you're a human being.
Speaker: You need to honor yourself.
Speaker: If you want to have a donut, have the donut.
Speaker: You feel bad because you made yourself feel bad because you think your coach is going to be angry at you.
Speaker: So honestly, for me, and I feel like everyone should know this, energy is everything, right?
Speaker: Don't laugh, but I bless everything and anything that goes in my mouth, right?
Speaker: And I literally would just tell people before you even need to feel bad about it, bless your donut.
Speaker: I kid you not, like put your hands.
Speaker: Because these are energy portals in the palms of our hand.
Speaker: Like literally like put your hands over your donut or chocolate bar, whatever it is, and say thank you for this blessing.
Speaker: Like literally the act of doing that, it shifts the energy within you to what you're about to consume, to where you won't even feel bad about it.
Speaker: It's interesting because I always tell people, like, don't have no relationship to the donut.
Speaker: Eat the damn donut.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: People don't have a relationship to food when they don't have awareness around food.
Speaker: They eat it.
Speaker: The point is I tell people, body awareness, food awareness.
Speaker: If I'm cooking something and I'm angry about the food I'm cooking, that's what I'm going to eat.
Speaker: But I feel good about this donut.
Speaker: I feel good about D-Star.
Speaker: Great culprit.
Speaker: Hey, baby.
Speaker: We feeling good.
Speaker: Hey.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I feel great.
Speaker: So I just know deep down people beat themselves up so much.
Speaker: I've done that in my life.
Speaker: We're like, damn, should I set it like that?
Speaker: It's just like all these fears and worries.
Speaker: I know it's important to always forgive.
Speaker: Just the little parts that we don't even think about every day.
Speaker: Being so a worthy list or not feeling worthy enough to be what we're getting or just receiving.
Speaker: So I was giving her something.
Speaker: We feel like we got to pay her right back.
Speaker: Like, no, just take it.
Speaker: Yeah, to receive that's a whole, like, am I worthy?
Speaker: That's a whole knowing your worth and you're worth everything and then some.
Speaker: And yeah, it's all self-inflicted.
Speaker: And honestly, the ones that are inflicting things on you, let's be honest, like, you don't want that in your life.
Speaker: Anyways, it's toxic.
Speaker: It's interesting, but I do want to go into a little bit of the crystals.
Speaker: You know, I got me some more and I got me at least I think I got one.
Speaker: Yes, beads.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Shouts out to the muse house.
Speaker: Hope you guys said it right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Excellent.
Speaker: We love her.
Speaker: Which is beautiful.
Speaker: Yeah, let's talk about your intuitiveness when it comes to crystals and how you work with crystals and how you got into it and how you share the power and benefits of crystals with clients.
Speaker: Like, how does that work in your world?
Speaker: I didn't even know that that's what I was doing.
Speaker: I just knew that I love jewelry.
Speaker: I love gemstones.
Speaker: And, you know, I love design.
Speaker: I love nice things.
Speaker: And I've been in the jewelry industry for over 20 years.
Speaker: Did everything.
Speaker: So I always believed in do what you love.
Speaker: Do what, like, makes your heart happy.
Speaker: Do what you see you're good at.
Speaker: And it makes you happy.
Speaker: Keep doing it.
Speaker: Because it truly does...
Speaker: Lead the path to your highest purpose.
Speaker: And that's what I did.
Speaker: I love jewelry.
Speaker: I quit a finance job where I was like making so much money because I was dying, literally dying being at the work desk.
Speaker: Before that, I was in the jewelry industry.
Speaker: The economy hit.
Speaker: This is like a long time ago kind of thing before like the recent economy stuff.
Speaker: But yeah, I just kept being in the jewelry industry.
Speaker: I was drawn to gems and crystals.
Speaker: And then all of a sudden I started my spiritual journey.
Speaker: where I started learning more about the energies and the properties of the crystals.
Speaker: And I started exploring that.
Speaker: And I'm like, no wonder I love the real things and not the fake stuff.
Speaker: Because it wasn't because it was real or fake.
Speaker: It was because there's energy in it.
Speaker: It has its own frequency, right?
Speaker: So I created a brand called Open Heart Warrior, what this symbol is.
Speaker: So it means inspire an open heart, empower your arrow, your intuition, and to connect.
Speaker: And I created the mala, which is a 108 meditation bead.
Speaker: I don't know if you're familiar with meditating with mala beads.
Speaker: Yeah, I've heard of them.
Speaker: I don't know the actual benefits, but you hear it.
Speaker: So, you know, like it's something that's good, but I don't know what's.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Well, the 108 mala is a Hindu prayer beat.
Speaker: It's older than the rosary beat.
Speaker: The rosary beat was actually inspired by the mala.
Speaker: So it has to do with like, you know, chanting kind of thing.
Speaker: So when I started to create it, I did it more because of the healing properties of crystals.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So the brand launched and one of the biggest things are the meditation wallets.
Speaker: And I'm a customer before profit founder.
Speaker: So everything is like impact driven for me and purpose.
Speaker: I'm not looking at numbers.
Speaker: So I chose what spoke to me when I would do like the crystal shopping and things like that.
Speaker: If a crystal spoke to me, I wasn't looking like, oh, this one's like in this price range.
Speaker: Let's get that.
Speaker: That's not me at all.
Speaker: I didn't know what I was doing was waiting, being a channel for the others to connect with the crystals, right?
Speaker: They started doing like wanderlust festivals, yoga festivals, wellness conferences and things like that.
Speaker: And in the process,
Speaker: The crystals would communicate with me.
Speaker: So people would come and people would normally ask like, hey, what's a good crystal for love?
Speaker: What's a good crystal for healing?
Speaker: And then I was like, you know what?
Speaker: Let's see what crystal you're going to connect with.
Speaker: So I literally started doing crystal guidance where I had people feel the vibrations and the frequencies of the crystals and help them connect in that way.
Speaker: And then it would be crystals or like mala designs.
Speaker: You're just like, I would never wear something like that.
Speaker: Or pink is not my color.
Speaker: That green is not mine.
Speaker: But I would ask them to close their eyes and feel the energy.
Speaker: Their minds would just be blown.
Speaker: And then later they'll find out like, shit, I do need that.
Speaker: A lot of the times it's like, you need to do this before you can do this.
Speaker: For example, like someone comes and says, like, I want to attract love.
Speaker: Like, where's my partner at?
Speaker: And then I would lead them in the crystal guidance and it will literally land them on healing the heart first.
Speaker: How can you attract love and have love that you want and you feel worthy of if you haven't done inner work for your love for yourself?
Speaker: Stuff like that.
Speaker: I tell people that all the time.
Speaker: You want a relationship with the other.
Speaker: You have to have a relationship with yourself.
Speaker: Then a relationship you want with someone else.
Speaker: There is one crystal that, so they communicate with me telepathically.
Speaker: They'll show themselves to me when I'm thinking of a person or whatever.
Speaker: And there's this one crystal that keeps showing itself to me when I think of you.
Speaker: What's the name of it?
Speaker: I don't want to tell you because what I love to do is have you do the crystal guidance and then see if it lands.
Speaker: I'm all about empowering one's intuition.
Speaker: I'm a guide in the channel.
Speaker: But you know, you already know, you know everything and everything's within us.
Speaker: All of the external stuff, it's just tools.
Speaker: Tools to amplify it.
Speaker: Let's talk about the word alchemy.
Speaker: The word is such a powerful, strong word.
Speaker: I feel like you are alchemy in so many ways.
Speaker: How did that word come into your life?
Speaker: What is alchemy?
Speaker: I think I know what it means, but I actually don't know what it means.
Speaker: Alchemy is like the whole turning like, you know, metals, not so precious metals into gold is like, you know, the root of it, right?
Speaker: It's chemistry.
Speaker: So alchemy is literally turning something that's negative.
Speaker: I do this because not all things is
Speaker: bad or negative.
Speaker: It's just a different vibration and frequency that might not feel good, but you need it to be able to alchemize and turn something into gold and something beautiful, turn it into love.
Speaker: So that's pretty much what alchemy is, right?
Speaker: It's turning something that's not so beautiful or painful and then alchemizing it, transmuting it first.
Speaker: There's that one process that people forget, which is the painful
Speaker: process, the burn, the purge, which comes with transmutation before you can even alchemize into the truth and the love and all of that stuff.
Speaker: So that makes sense.
Speaker: And I think that's what people are afraid of, is the burn and the purge and the surrendering and the letting go and not being so attached to the pain, not being so attached to the fear.
Speaker: Because we create patterns and programs that we get addicted to these things, even though they're unhealthy for our minds or our bodies.
Speaker: We're so used to it that we stay in it.
Speaker: We got to alchemize the soul.
Speaker: We got to heal.
Speaker: You also talk about having heal alchemy or catenomy.
Speaker: So Heal Alchemy Academy was birthed towards the ending of my five-year devotional self-healing journey and spiritual mastery journey too.
Speaker: The journeys continue.
Speaker: I also realized that it's not a destination.
Speaker: It's not just a journey.
Speaker: It's a lifestyle.
Speaker: You know why?
Speaker: Because we're human and we're going to be here.
Speaker: Having the tools to heal things from the past is
Speaker: But then life continues.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: So imagine having the tools that I was able to receive doing the work for five years.
Speaker: I pretty much was able to see the three.
Speaker: See, alchemy is also our recipe.
Speaker: The three alchemy to create healing, right?
Speaker: That actually can serve to make you a happier human, which is the energy work, right?
Speaker: with the forgiveness, and then it leads to consciousness.
Speaker: The consciousness part we haven't even tapped into because when you cleared and you're like dropping into meditation, you start to receive on a higher consciousness level and you start to remember who you truly are.
Speaker: Superpower isn't all because we all have superpowers.
Speaker: We really, really do.
Speaker: But a lot of the times, this is the thing.
Speaker: I struggled.
Speaker: I spent so much time and money from 2017 to 2019 just like
Speaker: paying for a Reiki, like doing retreats, purchasing this, doing all of the things.
Speaker: But then it was all just a bunch of stuff.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: It's like, what do I do with this?
Speaker: So when I was able to, in 2020, take all of the tools and then start receiving guidance on what to do first, just
Speaker: That's how Heal Alchemy was born.
Speaker: Like you have to do the energy work.
Speaker: The energy work helps you feel.
Speaker: And when you feel, you can only feel when you start to clear blockages around the heart.
Speaker: That's why a lot of people, it shows up as anxiety.
Speaker: And it's usually on the heart space.
Speaker: That energy that just can't move, it's just stuck here.
Speaker: So when you're doing energy work, when you go see an energy healer, whether it's Reiki, sound bath, tapping, whatever it is, because there's so many different modalities in each pillar of your alchemy, that like releases and spreads out that energy.
Speaker: And once that happens, it creates like a clearing that
Speaker: where you start to feel, you start to cry or you sleep better or whatever it is.
Speaker: But then in that process, you start to feel trauma and pain and things that now need to be forgiven, right?
Speaker: Which is then I'm just like, in doing that, I'm like, okay, this person's coming up or this situation, let me go now and do my forgiveness practice with that.
Speaker: And then as you're doing that, you're clearing everything.
Speaker: You're emptying your mind.
Speaker: And you're not just meditating.
Speaker: It doesn't matter how much you're meditating.
Speaker: If your mind is clogged, if your heart and your energy is clogged, you can meditate all you want, but then you're still frustrated.
Speaker: That's why it's because you haven't emptied out to then be able to really connect with consciousness, your consciousness and great spirit consciousness.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It just makes sense, the energy, the forgiveness, the consciousness.
Speaker: Yeah, that's the alchemy of healing from heal alchemy method, which is like tried and true for me.
Speaker: And then also my client, my initiate to have done it, to see it with them, that it works, which is why I was like, okay, after doing one year of serving others to where my method, where I saw it work for them, that's when I launched and announced heal alchemy.
Speaker: And when was that?
Speaker: 2022.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so are your clients just people or do you do companies, you do businesses, do you clear energy out of all of them, the places, are you that type of?
Speaker: I could do it all, but what I choose to do is serve the collective humanity.
Speaker: And really healing is to open your heart.
Speaker: And when your heart is open, then you get to remember who you truly are.
Speaker: All the superpowers and all of that too, but also that you're love.
Speaker: You're an embodiment of love.
Speaker: You have nothing to fear your space.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, I can do house clearing and all of those.
Speaker: We all can, especially in doing stuff for yourself, right?
Speaker: So I have personal one-on-one retreats.
Speaker: It's forever evolving and changing, which is why I had the urge to just reach more people that I'm not going to have one-on-one sessions with.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: To get the knowledge and information of forgiveness, which is a big part of healing yourself kind of thing.
Speaker: So I remember when I first met you, you told me about Deepak Chopra retreat.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So I did his retreat, like 21 to 22 or was it 23?
Speaker: I did his retreat.
Speaker: So he has these retreats that's like, you know, nationwide and worldwide too, where I had a contract with him.
Speaker: We were one of the soul vendors.
Speaker: So I was doing crystal guidance and offering the open heart warrior like Mollus and stuff and helping in that way.
Speaker: So we got the art of forgiveness.
Speaker: We got the crystal guidance.
Speaker: We got the happy human experience.
Speaker: But before we get off here, what's next for you, the person?
Speaker: We know about the healer and the quantum realm and the retreats.
Speaker: What's next for you?
Speaker: Like, what does Mary want for Mary outside of all the healing and the evolving herself?
Speaker: What does she earn for the most?
Speaker: I recently entered the face of really seeing the warrior within me.
Speaker: Really?
Speaker: Interesting.
Speaker: That was so much masculine energy, which was part of me protecting myself.
Speaker: I'm in this phase of continuing to surrender and to feel deeper and deeper and deeper and being the embodiment of a divine feminine woman and really surrender to that and feel safe and be that.
Speaker: And that's so beautiful because I feel like a lot of women are going through that phase right now.
Speaker: I have a few friends that are transitioning clients.
Speaker: What is the true divine feminine?
Speaker: And how do you think women who are more than masculine, for whatever reason, can move more to the divine feminine?
Speaker: You know, not just the easy way, but just a way of like, you know, they can with grace, I would say.
Speaker: Forgiveness.
Speaker: Oh, there we go.
Speaker: There we go.
Speaker: Ha ha.
Speaker: Because I'm going to tell you this in like super, super realization in doing this work.
Speaker: I saw how I self-sabotaged past romantic relationships without even knowing it.
Speaker: And I put the blame on the other person instead of
Speaker: holding myself accountable because it was all of the matrixes, the balls, conditioning, the traumas that I created without even consciously knowing this, right?
Speaker: And I self-sabotaged all of my relationships.
Speaker: And then I just had an awakening and like continuing to surrender and do like, you know, embrace myself and to embody who I want to show up for in a relationship.
Speaker: I'm just like, dang, I'm
Speaker: I did all of that.
Speaker: I was never a victim.
Speaker: It doesn't make the other person not a narcissist or that person didn't hurt me or anything like that.
Speaker: But I played a role too.
Speaker: I stayed and I argued and I turned myself into something that I would not because I chose to.
Speaker: Instead of loving myself enough, I
Speaker: to thank you and walk away.
Speaker: Like that's the return, like your divine feminine energy, the sovereign right to be soft, to be cared for, to surrender to your man and to trust them.
Speaker: It's a whole thing.
Speaker: But that's what I'm stepping into in my new, I don't even want to call it
Speaker: paradigm because all the old paradigms have collapsed of needing to be that warrior kind of thing you know to accept that yes i want help i need help i want to share life with someone i want to like grow and evolve and build with someone and i trust it because i trust me now because i'm safe with me you know
Speaker: And help is powerful, right?
Speaker: But we all need it.
Speaker: You're like, I couldn't have this podcast interview without your energy, your presence and everything.
Speaker: Because you make me, you make the podcast, you make the people listening better because we're all helping each other.
Speaker: We're all the collective.
Speaker: This is a community.
Speaker: We're opening up our hearts.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You let the love in.
Speaker: Then we heal and then we spread the love and the cosmos and then everyone wants love.
Speaker: And then we go back to like, well, how do you be a warrior?
Speaker: It's like we teach either, right?
Speaker: It's just a beautiful journey.
Speaker: So, you know, you say you got the book coming out this fall.
Speaker: Do you have any courses?
Speaker: You know, you do say you have one-on-ones.
Speaker: How can we reach you?
Speaker: How can we find you?
Speaker: And how can we on a daily engage with you and build or with your energy and who you are?
Speaker: Well, there's always Instagram, right?
Speaker: Which is at Mary Caroline Cruz.
Speaker: And then there's the website, healalchemy.com.
Speaker: The book is coming out in fall, but in the meantime, I am currently booking workshops that's happening locally and nationwide.
Speaker: I'm looking into some venues in New York and
Speaker: And I think Miami is also calling for it, but definitely Los Angeles.
Speaker: So I will be announcing that on both the HealAlchemy.com and then through at Mary Caroline Jewelry, the workshop.
Speaker: I'm really excited for that kind of thing, you know, to be able to share in an intimate space.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: more of like the heal alchemy outline of it because I am going to be doing a collective Reiki to be able to help people feel more, you know, so doing heart opening with that and then guiding into a forgiveness.
Speaker: So I'm going to help in the workshop.
Speaker: I'm going to help you identify something that's ready to come up and be released.
Speaker: And then I'm going to guide you on how to forgive that in the quantum realms.
Speaker: And then hopefully you start to incorporate that into your daily life, which is what the book is going to be about.
Speaker: Because then now you'll have like something tangible.
Speaker: It's on your time because that's definitely something I realized for myself and my clients.
Speaker: Everything, especially the healing journey, it's on your time.
Speaker: Just like you can't help anyone that's not yet ready to help themselves or go deeper.
Speaker: or you want something that you're not ready for.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And it's okay.
Speaker: Everything in divine time.
Speaker: And so people listening, you hear it.
Speaker: Energy work, the art of forgiveness, right?
Speaker: Consciousness will lead you to happiness.
Speaker: Get the book, Happy Human Experience.
Speaker: Follow Mary or Mary Caroline Cruz on Instagram.
Speaker: Check all her links.
Speaker: Everything will be provided in the show notes.
Speaker: This has been another Bigger Talks
Speaker: podcast episode don't forget to get your merfolk season merch at itsmerfolkseason.co shout out to simplify impact who produces and maintain all my content over social and youtube guys thank you for listening mary appreciate you you're amazing you're gorgeous and lovely he'll help me this is it this is all we're out peace and love
Speaker: Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger.
Speaker: If you enjoyed today's conversation and found it insightful, please consider sharing this episode with a friend, a co-worker, or someone who can benefit from these insightful discussions.
Speaker: Your support helps us reach more listeners as we continue to foster meaningful dialogues about the diverse subcultures of American life.
Speaker: I'm Eric Bigger, reminding you that every conversation has the power to broaden perspectives and foster connection.
Speaker: Until next time, keep embracing the unexpected on Bigger Talks.
