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Healing Heart and Soul: Mary Caroline Cruz's Journey of Forgiveness and Love image

Healing Heart and Soul: Mary Caroline Cruz's Journey of Forgiveness and Love

Spiritual Fitness with Eric Bigger
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194 Plays2 years ago

In this episode of Bigger Talks, Eric welcomes Mary Caroline Cruz to delve into her transformative journey centered on forgiveness and love, exploring themes of happiness and awakening. Mary shares the detailed art of self-healing and discusses her personal experiences that led to profound self-acceptance and love. Together, Mary and Eric examine the challenging yet rewarding process of self-healing and the crucial role of forgiveness in personal transformation. They explore the often misunderstood concept of forgiveness, underscoring its significance not just in mending past relationships but as a powerful remedy for both mental and physical ailments. Mary highlights that true forgiveness involves more than excusing others' actions; it's about freeing oneself from the burdens of pain and trauma.

Also in this episode:

  • The strength derived from gratitude can be transformative even in the face of monumental loss.
  • The unique path of navigating grief is deeply personal, with no universal roadmap to follow.
  • Being present with grief and providing support can be immensely comforting to those in mourning.
  • Curiosity leads to adventure and discovery, serving as a healing balm on the journey towards wholeness.

About Mary Caroline Cruz:

Mary Caroline Cruz, a Master Crystal Alchemist of Filipino and Portuguese descent, embarked on her spiritual journey in 2007 during a crucial low in her life. A transformative aura reading and a Reiki session that connected her with Archangel Michael sparked her profound awakening and interest in the synergy between earth energies and crystal healing. Since then, Mary has refined her abilities and become a renowned expert in crystal guidance and readings, sharing her expertise at national events such as Yoga Journal Live, Wanderlust Festivals, and Chopra Retreats from 2022 to 2023. Her deep resonance with the frequencies of crystals, gems, and stones has made her a pivotal figure for those looking to deepen their spiritual connections.

Learn More About Heal Alchemy Academy: https://www.healalchemy.com/offerings

Check Out Open Heart Warrior: https://www.openheartwarrior.com/


Check out Miracle Season’s collection: https://itsmiracleseason.co/collections/frontpage

Work with me: https://www.ericbigger.com/workwithme?utm_source=podcast&utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=work_with_m...

Connect with Simplified Impact: https://hubs.ly/Q02mVLDM0

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Transcript

Introduction to Bigger Talks

00:00:05
Speaker
Welcome to Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger, a podcast dedicated to delving into unexpected conversations with a diverse range of guests.
00:00:13
Speaker
I'm your host, Eric Bigger, and I'm joining you each week to create an authentic space of dialogue about the subcultures of American life.
00:00:20
Speaker
Through engaging discussions with writers, actors, experts, and influencers, we will explore the strength of diversity and the transformational power of vulnerability.
00:00:32
Speaker
So let's dive in and discover the unexpected together on Bigger Talks.
00:00:40
Speaker
Bigger Talks, Bigger Talks.
00:00:42
Speaker
Back again in another

Introducing Mary Caroline Cruz

00:00:44
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episode.
00:00:44
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And today, listen, people, it's going to be magical.
00:00:47
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It's going to be miracles.
00:00:48
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And I have the phenomenal lady, lovely Mary Caroline Cruz.
00:00:54
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She's the heel optimist.
00:00:57
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She does crystal guidance.
00:00:59
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You're not the healing.
00:01:00
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She does it all.
00:01:00
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We're going to talk about the art of forgiveness, the happy human experience, and her journey of being her highest, best self in this longing.
00:01:08
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Mary, welcome to Bigger Talks Podcast.
00:01:10
Speaker
How are you?

Mary's Journey to Self-Realization

00:01:12
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Oh my gosh, Eric, thank you so much for having me.
00:01:14
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Super, super grateful for you and this opportunity to have bigger talks with you.
00:01:18
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I'm excited.
00:01:20
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How are you?
00:01:21
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It's been a while.
00:01:23
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I'm happy to have your energy on this platform because you have so much to offer and your light is shining bright.
00:01:29
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And we were talking before the episode about your bio and your journey.
00:01:35
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And I think the first thing that stood out to me was,
00:01:38
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Your name, Mary Caroline Brewers.
00:01:40
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I'm like, so what name do you go by?
00:01:42
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So to the people listening, give them a synopsis of like who you are, where you are today.
00:01:49
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And let's tap into the vibration of you.
00:01:53
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Well, I am Mary Caroline Cruz.
00:01:56
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And I just recently in my self-realization and healing journey, I've accepted who I am fully.
00:02:04
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So I went from Mary Cruz to accepting who I am, Mary Caroline Cruz.
00:02:10
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It's been a journey.
00:02:11
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I'm Filipino.
00:02:12
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So I was born in the Philippines.
00:02:14
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I came when I was eight.
00:02:16
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That was the whole transition for me.
00:02:19
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And then even just being Filipino in general, there's a lot of decolonization happening there.
00:02:25
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So pretty much lost myself in the process of being here in the United States.

Spiritual Awakening and Commitment to Self-Love

00:02:31
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And then I
00:02:32
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Lost myself spiritually and who I am in my inside, like, you know, my inner sense, my truth.
00:02:39
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And then broke in a couple of times, broke into where I'm just like, didn't know who I was.
00:02:46
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That's when I started seeking to feel better about myself because I've always known as all of it that I'm like, you know what?
00:02:53
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I'm special.
00:02:54
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There's something about me that I need to remember that I lost as a child.
00:02:58
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And then all of that.
00:03:00
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And then to hear,
00:03:02
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Now, I started my awakening in my mid-20s, and that was a journey of awakening, then kind of like pushing it back, then being broken again.
00:03:17
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And then now it's just like, all right, no more messing around.
00:03:20
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I am going to show up for myself, and it's going to be a dedication and self-love journey of healing and, yeah, all of that stuff.
00:03:28
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Yeah, I love that.
00:03:29
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Self-healing, self-love, you know, you claim you were special.
00:03:34
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But you used some words that stood out to me, and I want you to give the audience, people listening, context of loss, right?
00:03:40
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Context of broken, context of awakening, right?
00:03:44
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What was loss?
00:03:46
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What was broken?
00:03:46
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And what did you awake in your journey?
00:03:49
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I lost who I was in my highest self, like who I came here and birthed into earth as being.
00:03:58
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Lost who, I mean, there's so many layers of that, Erin.
00:04:02
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So who were you before, before the loss?
00:04:04
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What like paradigm were you in?
00:04:06
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What frequency were you in the matrix?
00:04:08
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Like, were you just clueless?
00:04:10
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Were you just all ego?
00:04:11
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Like, who were you before all this took place?
00:04:14
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Ego is not a bad thing.
00:04:16
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Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:04:17
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But it was more of like the shame that came in growing up.
00:04:24
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Are you trying to make me emotional?
00:04:25
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I'm trying to make people just let go and release so we can get that peace to come through.
00:04:32
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I lost who I am, which is a really beautiful, open-hearted person that wore her on her sleeve that got teased for being sensitive.
00:04:42
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All of it.
00:04:43
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Who I truly am that made me happy, made me special.
00:04:47
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And I forgot all of that because then I started having the matrix create this whole reality around me that being sensitive and loving people too hard and too fast is something that's bad because you can't trust people.
00:05:03
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When in reality, that was creating this matrix that I couldn't trust myself.
00:05:08
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I couldn't trust my intuition.
00:05:10
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I wasn't safe in my decisions when all of that was untrue.
00:05:15
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So that was the awakening in two.
00:05:18
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Really the transmutation of that matrix through forgiveness, which starts really the deepest part of it is forgiving self and everything and everyone else.
00:05:29
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And then in that forgiveness, releasing all of that energy, the matrix that was created, and then creating so much space to remember who I truly am, which is divine love.
00:05:41
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I am here to love, period.
00:05:44
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I am love.
00:05:45
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So that was the awakening and alchemization of it all on a really deep spiritual wholeness, higher

The Role of Forgiveness in Healing

00:05:55
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self level.
00:05:56
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God is within me.
00:05:57
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I am God.
00:05:58
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You are God.
00:05:59
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All of that.
00:06:01
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But yeah, so that's what came out.
00:06:03
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Dennis, you know, it's beautiful because a lot of times we do get playing to be too sensitive as sensitive beings, whole beings, spiritual beings, all these things.
00:06:13
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I'm very sensitive.
00:06:13
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I can feel you growling.
00:06:15
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Right.
00:06:15
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Right.
00:06:15
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So thank you for sharing that vulnerability, that truth.
00:06:18
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And recently I discovered love is easy.
00:06:21
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Our minds make it hard.
00:06:23
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Right.
00:06:24
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You're a lover at heart.
00:06:25
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You're a lover from the soul.
00:06:26
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You are love.
00:06:27
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And that's what you came here to do.
00:06:28
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And for some reason, a matrix or the energies that were at work were trying to make you playing something else that like, no, I can be all these things.
00:06:37
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I can be sensitive.
00:06:38
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I can be emotional.
00:06:39
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I can be empathetic.
00:06:40
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I can be whatever I want to be.
00:06:42
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I choose to be.
00:06:43
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However, the world makes us forget we are.
00:06:47
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And it's all about their memory.
00:06:49
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And I'm so happy that you share those truths with us here because I want to go into the journey of the art of forgiveness and why forgiveness for you is powerful.
00:06:59
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Why forgiveness is powerful in the whole totality of the universe that we should know about or least understand.
00:07:07
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In totality, we are one.
00:07:10
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We literally are within each other.
00:07:14
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And the whole matrix part of it, right, the conditioning that started from birth, from our parents and our family to society and everything else, all of the human experience that is life, right?
00:07:29
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We continue to hurt each other in the fear and the conditioning of things that are untrue.
00:07:35
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So it like creates and creates and blockages and walls.
00:07:40
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And then on the journey of healing and wanting to heal yourself and feel better, because it's just, it's a lot to carry.
00:07:47
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You know what I mean?
00:07:48
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To carry that energy of pain and trauma, the feeling of being hurt and not really seeing the truth of it all, which all of us are innocent.
00:07:57
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We're all literally walking each other home.
00:08:00
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We're all literally trying to find the truth in it all and make peace.
00:08:05
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and be happy as humans.
00:08:08
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And in the heart of the journey of healing is forgiveness.
00:08:13
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Forgiving yourself.
00:08:15
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You say that again?
00:08:16
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It was so powerful.
00:08:18
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Wow.
00:08:19
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What did you call it?
00:08:19
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The heart of healing is forgiveness.
00:08:22
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Yeah.
00:08:22
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How did you get to that, Jim?
00:08:25
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I devoted without knowing I was going into a devoted five-year self-healing journey.
00:08:32
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It started in 2017, and then we all know what happened in 2020.
00:08:38
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And that gave me the opportunity to really dive into all of the things I kind of learned, like receiving Reiki healing, like working with crystals,
00:08:50
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learning about forgiveness stuff, right?
00:08:52
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But not really to when I learned how to do it myself.
00:08:57
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There really is like a recipe to that.
00:09:00
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So it was like taking all of the experience that I had from 2017, 18, 19, and in 2020, I
00:09:10
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I had nothing else to do, but journey inward was what I was called to do.
00:09:15
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And I showed up for it.
00:09:17
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And yeah, I started doing self-healing on myself, which in that process started bringing up trauma, like things and people that hurt me that I would just start bawling and crying.
00:09:31
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And I'm like, what do I do with this feeling?
00:09:33
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It's going to keep coming up.
00:09:35
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It's coming up because it's ready to be fazed.
00:09:38
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to be looked at, to be healed, forgiven, and released.
00:09:43
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Like I no longer wanted to carry it.
00:09:46
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And I didn't even know, again, I found out.
00:09:49
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You know what I mean?
00:09:50
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So it was literally like all day, every day, doing the energy work, having things come up, forgiving everything and everyone else.
00:09:59
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And I would intuitively know like, okay, that was me.
00:10:02
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Like, you know, at the same time, I'm sorry.
00:10:06
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So I work in the quantum realms.
00:10:07
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There's no space.
00:10:08
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There's no time.
00:10:09
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I don't need to be in front of the person to ask them for forgiveness because energy truly is everything and it will reach them one way or the other.
00:10:18
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But at the same time, I'm not doing it for them.
00:10:20
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I'm doing it for me.
00:10:22
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So, yeah, I started asking for forgiveness to people that I know I hurt.
00:10:27
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I started receiving forgiveness from people that hurt me.
00:10:32
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And then I started to really forgive myself for everything.
00:10:36
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And in that process, I started to feel lighter.
00:10:40
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And also in the process of forgiveness, you start to see the truth of it all.
00:10:45
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Just as I asked for forgiveness for others because I was innocent.
00:10:49
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I wasn't trying to intentionally hurt someone or whatever the case is.
00:10:53
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I didn't know any better.
00:10:54
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And that makes us all innocent.
00:10:57
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In a sense, again, we're one.
00:10:59
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We're mirrors of each other.
00:11:02
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Forgiveness does make you feel lighter.
00:11:04
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Right.
00:11:04
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And you said a lot that makes so much sense.
00:11:08
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But the thing that stood out, you said 2020 was a year inward.
00:11:14
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However, whatever was coming up was pain drama.
00:11:18
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And whenever it comes up, it needs to be based.
00:11:22
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I've come up with the idea that if you can come up with an idea or intention that you believe in and it hasn't been executed, that means you can do it.
00:11:31
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It came to your spirit for a reason.
00:11:33
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So with the pain, with the trauma, when it comes up, it needs to be faced.
00:11:38
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And I was telling someone the other day, like she was talking about rage and I was like, that rage is not yours.
00:11:44
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You got to get rid of it.
00:11:45
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You're holding on to it.
00:11:47
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So for you, with the, is it uno poco?
00:11:51
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The whole thing.
00:11:52
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I love you please.
00:11:52
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I'm sorry.
00:11:52
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Thank you.
00:11:53
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Yeah.
00:11:57
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Can you share with the listeners, what is some practical ways that we can heal ourselves from trauma we don't know about?

Ho'oponopono: Hawaiian Forgiveness Practice

00:12:07
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Because some of us have been molested and taken advantage of at an age that we can't remember, or we know the feeling, but we don't know the moment, or we were blacked out, intoxicated, whatever.
00:12:18
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How do you, or what is the best way to
00:12:21
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for people to forgive someone and forgive themselves, that's practical, that's relatable, that's like, okay, I can do that right now if I want to receive this.
00:12:32
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Yeah, so literally that's what the Happy Human Experience book is going to be about.
00:12:37
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It's a really tangible way to be able to do the forgiveness practice, which is based.
00:12:44
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The roots of it is from indigenous Hawaiian practice of forgiveness called Ho'okunokun'o, which means to make right rights.
00:12:53
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It became popularized here, like, especially starting in 2020.
00:12:57
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And, like, I witnessed its dilution, in a sense, to this present moment.
00:13:03
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It's a beautiful practice that Hawaiians use to really, for family, like, they would have, like, forgiveness huts.
00:13:14
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When someone is literally like on their deathbed, they bring all of the family in.
00:13:20
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Like, let's say, oh, for example, this person that's ill is saying, you know what?
00:13:26
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My cousin stole my pencil when I was in third grade.
00:13:30
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That's my truth.
00:13:32
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Bring that cousin in kind of thing.
00:13:34
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Bring that cousin in and let's do that.
00:13:36
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I'm sorry, cousin.
00:13:38
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Forgive me for taking your pencil and for not admitting it.
00:13:43
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And then the cousin, this is like in real life, right?
00:13:47
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Now I've like figured like,
00:13:48
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This is possible in the quantum realms.
00:13:51
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So then that cousin will literally, I forgive you.
00:13:54
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All is forgiven.
00:13:55
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And the cousin who took the pencil, thank you.
00:13:57
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I love you.
00:13:59
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We bring it back to love, right?
00:14:01
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Instead of like, they were hurt.
00:14:04
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I acknowledge you.
00:14:06
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So then the transportation, that pain lifts.
00:14:10
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And it heals the physical body because it can turn energy, hurt, and pain and trauma on an energetic level can turn into physical things like weight and illnesses and things like that.
00:14:24
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That's why I'm sure, I don't know if you've ever watched the movie, the documentary Heal.
00:14:28
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Yeah, one of my favorites.
00:14:31
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Okay, so you know, all those miracles of people like doing forgiveness with like even people that have transitioned and them miraculously coming out of their deathbed because they talked to their parents who already transitioned and they found out the truth like nothing's wrong.
00:14:47
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I love you.
00:14:47
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I've always loved you.
00:14:48
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And that would heal them like that.
00:14:50
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So yeah.
00:14:51
Speaker
We just opened up a whole new portal and I'm just getting some downloads.
00:14:56
Speaker
Wow.
00:14:57
Speaker
So hold up.
00:14:58
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So let me ask you a question.
00:14:59
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So do you think from your perspective and experience and from your higher self, do you believe forgiveness is an ill and medicine?
00:15:09
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1,000%, it's the most potent of all of it.
00:15:13
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Because forgiveness, first of all, is shamed on.
00:15:17
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A lot of people think to forgive means it makes the person, what the person did to them, okay.
00:15:22
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When that's not the truth at all.
00:15:24
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The truth is, you no longer wanna carry that pain.
00:15:28
Speaker
You don't want to carry that on your heart.
00:15:30
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Burden doesn't have anything to do with the other person.
00:15:33
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All about you.
00:15:35
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You know what I mean?
00:15:36
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And when you get to see that truth and release it, that's healing.
00:15:42
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Yeah, so do you also think that, and this is a little deeper, loaded question, but I just want to just take it there because this one came to mind.
00:15:49
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Anyone who has mental illness, physical illness, sick or anything in the body or the mind, do you think it's because somewhere in their current life or maybe their past life, they haven't forgave someone or something and that's why the energy is present in that form?
00:16:08
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Does that make sense?
00:16:10
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That does.
00:16:11
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I mean, that's really deep because there's so many reasons and everyone's different and everyone's on a different trajectory, a different journey, different traumas, different karmas to be healed.
00:16:24
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There's so many things that is possible with that.
00:16:28
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And the only thing that I can tell you
00:16:31
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is you start with self.
00:16:32
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Just like I've witnessed myself forgive my mom for things that, and I found out she was so innocent in that, forgave my dad, and saw his innocence in it, and literally, energetically, they shifted.
00:16:49
Speaker
And my relationship with them has healed with me doing me.
00:16:53
Speaker
Yeah.
00:16:55
Speaker
And you don't have to worry about the other person, even if it's your parents, right?
00:17:00
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When you do your own healing work, it does, it heals you, it clears you, and that energy is connected with the other person and it helps them too without even knowing it.
00:17:11
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That's what's so beautiful.
00:17:13
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So beautiful that you say that because it is for you and it blares your energy still.
00:17:17
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So last year, you know, experiencing a dark night of the soul was tough, right?
00:17:21
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I was praying so much, but I knew about forgiveness.
00:17:25
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So I started to like forgive people, forgive myself.
00:17:29
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Then I'm like, okay, cool.
00:17:30
Speaker
But then I got testified in it when I was doing it every day.
00:17:34
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And it was so interesting.
00:17:35
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I was doing like three straight days, like early in the morning, midday.
00:17:38
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I kept doing it with the same person and myself.
00:17:42
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I was telling my cousin, I was like, oh man, I'm just forgiving.
00:17:45
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But I didn't understand what I was saying at the time, but I just know I felt different.
00:17:49
Speaker
But you're confirming that experience that forgiveness is a healing medicine.
00:17:54
Speaker
It is a healing weapon.
00:17:55
Speaker
to release yourself from fears and worries of things that you might have done or didn't do or things people have done to you.
00:18:02
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It's so special that the art of forgiveness is the way to heal ourselves, to heal others, to heal the universe.
00:18:10
Speaker
That's tangible.
00:18:11
Speaker
But at the same time, I've spoken to so many people where I'll tell them, like, you need to forgive that, you know, or to do this, let that go.
00:18:21
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And across the board, everyone wants to forgive.
00:18:23
Speaker
But...
00:18:25
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How do you forgive?
00:18:26
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And it's not easy.
00:18:29
Speaker
You know, anything is what I got, which is why I was inspired to pretty much take the heal alchemy process, which contains three pillars of energy work, forgiveness and consciousness.
00:18:41
Speaker
Right.
00:18:42
Speaker
But the bottom line, the entire process of learning that it's to become a happy human.
00:18:48
Speaker
Right.

Challenges of Forgiveness in Healing

00:18:50
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And then in the heart of it is the forgiveness, which is what a lot of people, it's easy to do that, right?
00:18:57
Speaker
Like, do you want to be a happy person?
00:18:59
Speaker
Yes, that's so normal to say, right?
00:19:01
Speaker
I want to be happy.
00:19:03
Speaker
I want to forgive.
00:19:04
Speaker
So what I'm getting from people is they want to learn how to forgive because it is hard to do forgiveness, especially when you feel the hurt and the pain and the trauma and whatever that happened to you in the past.
00:19:17
Speaker
I love this.
00:19:18
Speaker
I love this.
00:19:19
Speaker
It's right on point.
00:19:20
Speaker
So the question is, or what I'm thinking is that, why is it hard for people to hear?
00:19:27
Speaker
Why do you think?
00:19:29
Speaker
I know my reason, but I would love to know your reason.
00:19:31
Speaker
Honestly, a lot of people don't even know they have to or they have anything to do.
00:19:36
Speaker
They're not awake to that.
00:19:38
Speaker
They don't have that self-realization yet.
00:19:41
Speaker
Then the guidance, that's hard.
00:19:43
Speaker
There's social media.
00:19:44
Speaker
There's so much text and information that's getting out there, but there's also so much dilution that's happening.
00:19:51
Speaker
Yeah, that's all I'm going to touch on on that part because everyone's on their journey.
00:19:55
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:19:56
Speaker
And I respect everyone and their processes and everything.
00:19:59
Speaker
Yeah, so can we run over the script of how to heal yourself?
00:20:03
Speaker
So I want to give you a scenario, the listeners, a scenario.
00:20:06
Speaker
It's relatable, I would say, to most people.
00:20:09
Speaker
So say, for instance, you're on a fitness journey.
00:20:12
Speaker
You want to get in shape.
00:20:13
Speaker
You want to lose weight or you just want to do the right thing and say your challenge is your diet, right?
00:20:19
Speaker
Go to the gym.
00:20:20
Speaker
You can get up on time.
00:20:21
Speaker
So you're out at an event.
00:20:24
Speaker
Gives you something that you probably wouldn't eat.
00:20:27
Speaker
Let's say someone gives you a donut, right?
00:20:29
Speaker
You eat the donut.
00:20:30
Speaker
But while you're eating, you're thinking about like, I was on this diet.
00:20:34
Speaker
So make a long story short, the night's over, you go home.
00:20:36
Speaker
Now you feel shame.
00:20:38
Speaker
Now you feel killed.
00:20:39
Speaker
Now you're afraid to talk to your coach or your trainer, right?
00:20:41
Speaker
Now you're carrying all that energy.
00:20:44
Speaker
For someone out there, someone listening that has just done that, doing that, what is the script to run by for them to eat this energy off of them?
00:20:54
Speaker
Because something that we got to forgive ourselves.
00:20:57
Speaker
Well, that's another thing, right?
00:20:59
Speaker
First of all, I'm going to tell you something to where you don't even need to feel bad.
00:21:04
Speaker
That's the thing.
00:21:05
Speaker
You have the coach and yourself that created this matrix that it's bad for you to eat that donut.
00:21:11
Speaker
You need to understand you're a human being.
00:21:14
Speaker
You need to honor yourself.
00:21:16
Speaker
If you want to have a donut, have the donut.
00:21:20
Speaker
You feel bad because you made yourself feel bad because you think your coach is going to be angry at you.
00:21:27
Speaker
So honestly, for me, and I feel like everyone should know this, energy is everything, right?
00:21:33
Speaker
Don't laugh, but I bless everything and anything that goes in my mouth, right?
00:21:37
Speaker
And I literally would just tell people before you even need to feel bad about it, bless your donut.
00:21:43
Speaker
I kid you not, like put your hands.
00:21:46
Speaker
Because these are energy portals in the palms of our hand.
00:21:49
Speaker
Like literally like put your hands over your donut or chocolate bar, whatever it is, and say thank you for this blessing.
00:21:59
Speaker
Like literally the act of doing that, it shifts the energy within you to what you're about to consume, to where you won't even feel bad about it.
00:22:10
Speaker
It's interesting because I always tell people, like, don't have no relationship to the donut.
00:22:14
Speaker
Eat the damn donut.
00:22:15
Speaker
Yes.
00:22:16
Speaker
People don't have a relationship to food when they don't have awareness around food.
00:22:20
Speaker
They eat it.
00:22:21
Speaker
The point is I tell people, body awareness, food awareness.
00:22:25
Speaker
If I'm cooking something and I'm angry about the food I'm cooking, that's what I'm going to eat.
00:22:29
Speaker
But I feel good about this donut.
00:22:31
Speaker
I feel good about D-Star.
00:22:33
Speaker
Great culprit.
00:22:34
Speaker
Hey, baby.
00:22:35
Speaker
We feeling good.
00:22:37
Speaker
Hey.
00:22:37
Speaker
Yeah.
00:22:38
Speaker
I feel great.
00:22:39
Speaker
So I just know deep down people beat themselves up so much.
00:22:43
Speaker
I've done that in my life.
00:22:44
Speaker
We're like, damn, should I set it like that?
00:22:46
Speaker
It's just like all these fears and worries.
00:22:50
Speaker
I know it's important to always forgive.
00:22:53
Speaker
Just the little parts that we don't even think about every day.
00:22:55
Speaker
Being so a worthy list or not feeling worthy enough to be what we're getting or just receiving.
00:23:01
Speaker
So I was giving her something.
00:23:02
Speaker
We feel like we got to pay her right back.
00:23:04
Speaker
Like, no, just take it.
00:23:06
Speaker
Yeah, to receive that's a whole, like, am I worthy?
00:23:10
Speaker
That's a whole knowing your worth and you're worth everything and then some.
00:23:14
Speaker
And yeah, it's all self-inflicted.
00:23:18
Speaker
And honestly, the ones that are inflicting things on you, let's be honest, like, you don't want that in your life.
00:23:23
Speaker
Anyways, it's toxic.
00:23:26
Speaker
It's interesting, but I do want to go into a little bit of the crystals.

Jewelry, Gemstones, and Crystal Guidance

00:23:31
Speaker
You know, I got me some more and I got me at least I think I got one.
00:23:34
Speaker
Yes, beads.
00:23:35
Speaker
Right.
00:23:36
Speaker
Shouts out to the muse house.
00:23:38
Speaker
Hope you guys said it right.
00:23:39
Speaker
Yeah.
00:23:40
Speaker
Excellent.
00:23:41
Speaker
We love her.
00:23:42
Speaker
Which is beautiful.
00:23:45
Speaker
Yeah, let's talk about your intuitiveness when it comes to crystals and how you work with crystals and how you got into it and how you share the power and benefits of crystals with clients.
00:23:55
Speaker
Like, how does that work in your world?
00:23:57
Speaker
I didn't even know that that's what I was doing.
00:23:59
Speaker
I just knew that I love jewelry.
00:24:01
Speaker
I love gemstones.
00:24:03
Speaker
And, you know, I love design.
00:24:05
Speaker
I love nice things.
00:24:08
Speaker
And I've been in the jewelry industry for over 20 years.
00:24:13
Speaker
Did everything.
00:24:14
Speaker
So I always believed in do what you love.
00:24:17
Speaker
Do what, like, makes your heart happy.
00:24:19
Speaker
Do what you see you're good at.
00:24:21
Speaker
And it makes you happy.
00:24:22
Speaker
Keep doing it.
00:24:24
Speaker
Because it truly does...
00:24:26
Speaker
Lead the path to your highest purpose.
00:24:29
Speaker
And that's what I did.
00:24:31
Speaker
I love jewelry.
00:24:32
Speaker
I quit a finance job where I was like making so much money because I was dying, literally dying being at the work desk.
00:24:40
Speaker
Before that, I was in the jewelry industry.
00:24:43
Speaker
The economy hit.
00:24:45
Speaker
This is like a long time ago kind of thing before like the recent economy stuff.
00:24:51
Speaker
But yeah, I just kept being in the jewelry industry.
00:24:54
Speaker
I was drawn to gems and crystals.
00:24:57
Speaker
And then all of a sudden I started my spiritual journey.
00:25:01
Speaker
where I started learning more about the energies and the properties of the crystals.
00:25:07
Speaker
And I started exploring that.
00:25:09
Speaker
And I'm like, no wonder I love the real things and not the fake stuff.
00:25:13
Speaker
Because it wasn't because it was real or fake.
00:25:15
Speaker
It was because there's energy in it.
00:25:17
Speaker
It has its own frequency, right?
00:25:20
Speaker
So I created a brand called Open Heart Warrior, what this symbol is.
00:25:25
Speaker
So it means inspire an open heart, empower your arrow, your intuition, and to connect.
00:25:32
Speaker
And I created the mala, which is a 108 meditation bead.
00:25:36
Speaker
I don't know if you're familiar with meditating with mala beads.
00:25:40
Speaker
Yeah, I've heard of them.
00:25:42
Speaker
I don't know the actual benefits, but you hear it.
00:25:44
Speaker
So, you know, like it's something that's good, but I don't know what's.
00:25:47
Speaker
Yeah.
00:25:48
Speaker
Well, the 108 mala is a Hindu prayer beat.
00:25:52
Speaker
It's older than the rosary beat.
00:25:54
Speaker
The rosary beat was actually inspired by the mala.
00:25:57
Speaker
So it has to do with like, you know, chanting kind of thing.
00:26:02
Speaker
So when I started to create it, I did it more because of the healing properties of crystals.
00:26:07
Speaker
Yeah.
00:26:08
Speaker
So the brand launched and one of the biggest things are the meditation wallets.
00:26:12
Speaker
And I'm a customer before profit founder.
00:26:17
Speaker
So everything is like impact driven for me and purpose.
00:26:20
Speaker
I'm not looking at numbers.
00:26:22
Speaker
So I chose what spoke to me when I would do like the crystal shopping and things like that.
00:26:28
Speaker
If a crystal spoke to me, I wasn't looking like, oh, this one's like in this price range.
00:26:34
Speaker
Let's get that.
00:26:35
Speaker
That's not me at all.
00:26:37
Speaker
I didn't know what I was doing was waiting, being a channel for the others to connect with the crystals, right?
00:26:44
Speaker
They started doing like wanderlust festivals, yoga festivals, wellness conferences and things like that.
00:26:51
Speaker
And in the process,
00:26:52
Speaker
The crystals would communicate with me.
00:26:55
Speaker
So people would come and people would normally ask like, hey, what's a good crystal for love?
00:27:00
Speaker
What's a good crystal for healing?
00:27:02
Speaker
And then I was like, you know what?
00:27:03
Speaker
Let's see what crystal you're going to connect with.
00:27:06
Speaker
So I literally started doing crystal guidance where I had people feel the vibrations and the frequencies of the crystals and help them connect in that way.
00:27:17
Speaker
And then it would be crystals or like mala designs.
00:27:21
Speaker
You're just like, I would never wear something like that.
00:27:23
Speaker
Or pink is not my color.
00:27:25
Speaker
That green is not mine.
00:27:27
Speaker
But I would ask them to close their eyes and feel the energy.
00:27:32
Speaker
Their minds would just be blown.
00:27:33
Speaker
And then later they'll find out like, shit, I do need that.
00:27:38
Speaker
A lot of the times it's like, you need to do this before you can do this.
00:27:42
Speaker
For example, like someone comes and says, like, I want to attract love.
00:27:46
Speaker
Like, where's my partner at?
00:27:48
Speaker
And then I would lead them in the crystal guidance and it will literally land them on healing the heart first.
00:27:54
Speaker
How can you attract love and have love that you want and you feel worthy of if you haven't done inner work for your love for yourself?
00:28:05
Speaker
Stuff like that.
00:28:07
Speaker
I tell people that all the time.
00:28:10
Speaker
You want a relationship with the other.
00:28:11
Speaker
You have to have a relationship with yourself.
00:28:15
Speaker
Then a relationship you want with someone else.
00:28:17
Speaker
There is one crystal that, so they communicate with me telepathically.
00:28:22
Speaker
They'll show themselves to me when I'm thinking of a person or whatever.
00:28:26
Speaker
And there's this one crystal that keeps showing itself to me when I think of you.
00:28:31
Speaker
What's the name of it?
00:28:32
Speaker
I don't want to tell you because what I love to do is have you do the crystal guidance and then see if it lands.
00:28:40
Speaker
I'm all about empowering one's intuition.
00:28:43
Speaker
I'm a guide in the channel.
00:28:45
Speaker
But you know, you already know, you know everything and everything's within us.
00:28:49
Speaker
All of the external stuff, it's just tools.
00:28:51
Speaker
Tools to amplify it.
00:28:53
Speaker
Let's talk about the word alchemy.
00:28:55
Speaker
The word is such a powerful, strong word.
00:28:58
Speaker
I feel like you are alchemy in so many ways.
00:29:01
Speaker
How did that word come into your life?
00:29:03
Speaker
What is alchemy?
00:29:04
Speaker
I think I know what it means, but I actually don't know what it means.
00:29:08
Speaker
Alchemy is like the whole turning like, you know, metals, not so precious metals into gold is like, you know, the root of it, right?
00:29:18
Speaker
It's chemistry.
00:29:19
Speaker
So alchemy is literally turning something that's negative.
00:29:24
Speaker
I do this because not all things is
00:29:26
Speaker
bad or negative.
00:29:27
Speaker
It's just a different vibration and frequency that might not feel good, but you need it to be able to alchemize and turn something into gold and something beautiful, turn

Alchemy and Transforming Negative Experiences

00:29:37
Speaker
it into love.
00:29:37
Speaker
So that's pretty much what alchemy is, right?
00:29:40
Speaker
It's turning something that's not so beautiful or painful and then alchemizing it, transmuting it first.
00:29:47
Speaker
There's that one process that people forget, which is the painful
00:29:52
Speaker
process, the burn, the purge, which comes with transmutation before you can even alchemize into the truth and the love and all of that stuff.
00:30:03
Speaker
So that makes sense.
00:30:04
Speaker
And I think that's what people are afraid of, is the burn and the purge and the surrendering and the letting go and not being so attached to the pain, not being so attached to the fear.
00:30:13
Speaker
Because we create patterns and programs that we get addicted to these things, even though they're unhealthy for our minds or our bodies.
00:30:21
Speaker
We're so used to it that we stay in it.
00:30:24
Speaker
We got to alchemize the soul.
00:30:25
Speaker
We got to heal.
00:30:27
Speaker
You also talk about having heal alchemy or catenomy.
00:30:31
Speaker
So Heal Alchemy Academy was birthed towards the ending of my five-year devotional self-healing journey and spiritual mastery journey too.
00:30:42
Speaker
The journeys continue.
00:30:43
Speaker
I also realized that it's not a destination.
00:30:46
Speaker
It's not just a journey.
00:30:48
Speaker
It's a lifestyle.
00:30:49
Speaker
You know why?
00:30:49
Speaker
Because we're human and we're going to be here.
00:30:53
Speaker
Having the tools to heal things from the past is
00:30:57
Speaker
But then life continues.
00:30:59
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:31:00
Speaker
So imagine having the tools that I was able to receive doing the work for five years.
00:31:08
Speaker
I pretty much was able to see the three.
00:31:12
Speaker
See, alchemy is also our recipe.
00:31:13
Speaker
The three alchemy to create healing, right?
00:31:17
Speaker
That actually can serve to make you a happier human, which is the energy work, right?
00:31:23
Speaker
with the forgiveness, and then it leads to consciousness.
00:31:28
Speaker
The consciousness part we haven't even tapped into because when you cleared and you're like dropping into meditation, you start to receive on a higher consciousness level and you start to remember who you truly are.
00:31:42
Speaker
Superpower isn't all because we all have superpowers.
00:31:46
Speaker
We really, really do.
00:31:47
Speaker
But a lot of the times, this is the thing.
00:31:51
Speaker
I struggled.
00:31:52
Speaker
I spent so much time and money from 2017 to 2019 just like
00:31:58
Speaker
paying for a Reiki, like doing retreats, purchasing this, doing all of the things.
00:32:05
Speaker
But then it was all just a bunch of stuff.
00:32:08
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:32:08
Speaker
It's like, what do I do with this?
00:32:11
Speaker
So when I was able to, in 2020, take all of the tools and then start receiving guidance on what to do first, just
00:32:19
Speaker
That's how Heal Alchemy was born.
00:32:21
Speaker
Like you have to do the energy work.
00:32:23
Speaker
The energy work helps you feel.
00:32:26
Speaker
And when you feel, you can only feel when you start to clear blockages around the heart.
00:32:31
Speaker
That's why a lot of people, it shows up as anxiety.
00:32:34
Speaker
And it's usually on the heart space.
00:32:36
Speaker
That energy that just can't move, it's just stuck here.
00:32:40
Speaker
So when you're doing energy work, when you go see an energy healer, whether it's Reiki, sound bath, tapping, whatever it is, because there's so many different modalities in each pillar of your alchemy, that like releases and spreads out that energy.
00:32:56
Speaker
And once that happens, it creates like a clearing that
00:32:59
Speaker
where you start to feel, you start to cry or you sleep better or whatever it is.
00:33:05
Speaker
But then in that process, you start to feel trauma and pain and things that now need to be forgiven, right?
00:33:14
Speaker
Which is then I'm just like, in doing that, I'm like, okay, this person's coming up or this situation, let me go now and do my forgiveness practice with that.
00:33:25
Speaker
And then as you're doing that, you're clearing everything.
00:33:28
Speaker
You're emptying your mind.
00:33:31
Speaker
And you're not just meditating.
00:33:32
Speaker
It doesn't matter how much you're meditating.
00:33:33
Speaker
If your mind is clogged, if your heart and your energy is clogged, you can meditate all you want, but then you're still frustrated.
00:33:41
Speaker
That's why it's because you haven't emptied out to then be able to really connect with consciousness, your consciousness and great spirit consciousness.
00:33:51
Speaker
Yeah.
00:33:52
Speaker
It just makes sense, the energy, the forgiveness, the consciousness.
00:33:55
Speaker
Yeah, that's the alchemy of healing from heal alchemy method, which is like tried and true for me.

Introduction to Heal Alchemy Method

00:34:04
Speaker
And then also my client, my initiate to have done it, to see it with them, that it works, which is why I was like, okay, after doing one year of serving others to where my method, where I saw it work for them, that's when I launched and announced heal alchemy.
00:34:20
Speaker
And when was that?
00:34:21
Speaker
2022.
00:34:23
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:23
Speaker
And so are your clients just people or do you do companies, you do businesses, do you clear energy out of all of them, the places, are you that type of?
00:34:32
Speaker
I could do it all, but what I choose to do is serve the collective humanity.
00:34:37
Speaker
And really healing is to open your heart.
00:34:41
Speaker
And when your heart is open, then you get to remember who you truly are.
00:34:46
Speaker
All the superpowers and all of that too, but also that you're love.
00:34:49
Speaker
You're an embodiment of love.
00:34:52
Speaker
You have nothing to fear your space.
00:34:53
Speaker
Yeah.
00:34:54
Speaker
Yeah, I can do house clearing and all of those.
00:34:56
Speaker
We all can, especially in doing stuff for yourself, right?
00:35:00
Speaker
So I have personal one-on-one retreats.
00:35:02
Speaker
It's forever evolving and changing, which is why I had the urge to just reach more people that I'm not going to have one-on-one sessions with.
00:35:13
Speaker
You know what I mean?
00:35:14
Speaker
To get the knowledge and information of forgiveness, which is a big part of healing yourself kind of thing.
00:35:21
Speaker
So I remember when I first met you, you told me about Deepak Chopra retreat.
00:35:26
Speaker
Yeah.
00:35:26
Speaker
So I did his retreat, like 21 to 22 or was it 23?
00:35:32
Speaker
I did his retreat.
00:35:33
Speaker
So he has these retreats that's like, you know, nationwide and worldwide too, where I had a contract with him.
00:35:42
Speaker
We were one of the soul vendors.
00:35:43
Speaker
So I was doing crystal guidance and offering the open heart warrior like Mollus and stuff and helping in that way.
00:35:51
Speaker
So we got the art of forgiveness.
00:35:52
Speaker
We got the crystal guidance.
00:35:54
Speaker
We got the happy human experience.
00:35:55
Speaker
But before we get off here, what's next for you, the person?
00:35:59
Speaker
We know about the healer and the quantum realm and the retreats.
00:36:03
Speaker
What's next for you?
00:36:04
Speaker
Like, what does Mary want for Mary outside of all the healing and the evolving herself?

Embracing Divine Feminine Energy

00:36:10
Speaker
What does she earn for the most?
00:36:12
Speaker
I recently entered the face of really seeing the warrior within me.
00:36:17
Speaker
Really?
00:36:18
Speaker
Interesting.
00:36:19
Speaker
That was so much masculine energy, which was part of me protecting myself.
00:36:26
Speaker
I'm in this phase of continuing to surrender and to feel deeper and deeper and deeper and being the embodiment of a divine feminine woman and really surrender to that and feel safe and be that.
00:36:40
Speaker
And that's so beautiful because I feel like a lot of women are going through that phase right now.
00:36:44
Speaker
I have a few friends that are transitioning clients.
00:36:48
Speaker
What is the true divine feminine?
00:36:51
Speaker
And how do you think women who are more than masculine, for whatever reason, can move more to the divine feminine?
00:36:58
Speaker
You know, not just the easy way, but just a way of like, you know, they can with grace, I would say.
00:37:03
Speaker
Forgiveness.
00:37:04
Speaker
Oh, there we go.
00:37:06
Speaker
There we go.
00:37:07
Speaker
Ha ha.
00:37:08
Speaker
Because I'm going to tell you this in like super, super realization in doing this work.
00:37:15
Speaker
I saw how I self-sabotaged past romantic relationships without even knowing it.
00:37:23
Speaker
And I put the blame on the other person instead of
00:37:25
Speaker
holding myself accountable because it was all of the matrixes, the balls, conditioning, the traumas that I created without even consciously knowing this, right?
00:37:36
Speaker
And I self-sabotaged all of my relationships.
00:37:39
Speaker
And then I just had an awakening and like continuing to surrender and do like, you know, embrace myself and to embody who I want to show up for in a relationship.
00:37:49
Speaker
I'm just like, dang, I'm
00:37:52
Speaker
I did all of that.
00:37:53
Speaker
I was never a victim.
00:37:55
Speaker
It doesn't make the other person not a narcissist or that person didn't hurt me or anything like that.
00:38:00
Speaker
But I played a role too.
00:38:02
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I stayed and I argued and I turned myself into something that I would not because I chose to.
00:38:10
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Instead of loving myself enough, I
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to thank you and walk away.
00:38:15
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Like that's the return, like your divine feminine energy, the sovereign right to be soft, to be cared for, to surrender to your man and to trust them.
00:38:26
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It's a whole thing.
00:38:27
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But that's what I'm stepping into in my new, I don't even want to call it
00:38:33
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paradigm because all the old paradigms have collapsed of needing to be that warrior kind of thing you know to accept that yes i want help i need help i want to share life with someone i want to like grow and evolve and build with someone and i trust it because i trust me now because i'm safe with me you know
00:38:56
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And help is powerful, right?
00:38:58
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But we all need it.
00:38:59
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You're like, I couldn't have this podcast interview without your energy, your presence and everything.
00:39:04
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Because you make me, you make the podcast, you make the people listening better because we're all helping each other.
00:39:10
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We're all the collective.
00:39:11
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This is a community.
00:39:12
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We're opening up our hearts.
00:39:14
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You know?
00:39:14
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Yeah.
00:39:15
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You let the love in.
00:39:16
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Then we heal and then we spread the love and the cosmos and then everyone wants love.
00:39:20
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And then we go back to like, well, how do you be a warrior?
00:39:23
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It's like we teach either, right?
00:39:25
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It's just a beautiful journey.
00:39:26
Speaker
So, you know, you say you got the book coming out this fall.
00:39:29
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Do you have any courses?
00:39:30
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You know, you do say you have one-on-ones.
00:39:33
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How can we reach you?
00:39:34
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How can we find you?
00:39:35
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And how can we on a daily engage with you and build or with your energy and who you are?
00:39:41
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Well, there's always Instagram, right?
00:39:43
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Which is at Mary Caroline Cruz.
00:39:46
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And then there's the website, healalchemy.com.
00:39:51
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The book is coming out in fall, but in the meantime, I am currently booking workshops that's happening locally and nationwide.
00:40:01
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I'm looking into some venues in New York and
00:40:05
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And I think Miami is also calling for it, but definitely Los Angeles.
00:40:10
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So I will be announcing that on both the HealAlchemy.com and then through at Mary Caroline Jewelry, the workshop.
00:40:19
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I'm really excited for that kind of thing, you know, to be able to share in an intimate space.
00:40:26
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Yeah.
00:40:27
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more of like the heal alchemy outline of it because I am going to be doing a collective Reiki to be able to help people feel more, you know, so doing heart opening with that and then guiding into a forgiveness.
00:40:41
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So I'm going to help in the workshop.
00:40:43
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I'm going to help you identify something that's ready to come up and be released.
00:40:48
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And then I'm going to guide you on how to forgive that in the quantum realms.
00:40:54
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And then hopefully you start to incorporate that into your daily life, which is what the book is going to be about.
00:41:02
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Because then now you'll have like something tangible.
00:41:05
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It's on your time because that's definitely something I realized for myself and my clients.
00:41:11
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Everything, especially the healing journey, it's on your time.
00:41:14
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Just like you can't help anyone that's not yet ready to help themselves or go deeper.
00:41:19
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or you want something that you're not ready for.
00:41:21
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Exactly.
00:41:21
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And it's okay.
00:41:24
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Everything in divine time.
00:41:25
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And so people listening, you hear it.
00:41:27
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Energy work, the art of forgiveness, right?
00:41:30
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Consciousness will lead you to happiness.
00:41:33
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Get the book, Happy Human Experience.
00:41:35
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Follow Mary or Mary Caroline Cruz on Instagram.
00:41:39
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Check all her links.
00:41:40
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Everything will be provided in the show notes.
00:41:42
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This has been another Bigger Talks
00:41:44
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podcast episode don't forget to get your merfolk season merch at itsmerfolkseason.co shout out to simplify impact who produces and maintain all my content over social and youtube guys thank you for listening mary appreciate you you're amazing you're gorgeous and lovely he'll help me this is it this is all we're out peace and love
00:42:07
Speaker
Thank you for tuning in to another episode of Bigger Talks with Eric Bigger.
00:42:12
Speaker
If you enjoyed today's conversation and found it insightful, please consider sharing this episode with a friend, a co-worker, or someone who can benefit from these insightful discussions.

Conclusion and Call to Engage

00:42:22
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Your support helps us reach more listeners as we continue to foster meaningful dialogues about the diverse subcultures of American life.
00:42:29
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I'm Eric Bigger, reminding you that every conversation has the power to broaden perspectives and foster connection.
00:42:35
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Until next time, keep embracing the unexpected on Bigger Talks.