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EP 57: A Letter to our Pre-Baby Selves
1.5k Plays1 month ago
In this heartfelt episode of Mom Group Chat, your hosts Candace and Whitney take a trip down memory lane. We each wrote a letter to our pre-baby selves, filled with the wisdom, love, and hard-earned lessons we've gained along the way. It’s an emotional journey as we reflect on how motherhood has changed us, what we wish we’d known back then, and the advice we’d give to the women we were before our little ones arrived.
But it’s not all about the past—we also dive into our shared obsession with the Olympics! From the inspiring stories of athletes who overcome incredible odds to the thrill of watching our favorite events, we talk about what makes the Olympics so special to us and why we can’t get enough of it.
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Transcript
00:00:07
Speaker
There's no right way to do it.
00:00:12
Speaker
Oh, we're going to get into it. What up, team moms? I'm with my best friend, Candace, and this is the Mom Group Chat podcast. And I'm Whitney. Hello. It's about damn time someone else messed it up, honestly. Oh, here I am. That was funny. ah okay Were you saying teen moms or team moms? Teen. ah because we're Because we're all 15 having children.
00:00:43
Speaker
ah Yeah. There is a couple of moms in my Q1 moms group that are like just now turning 30. They're like on the younger end of our group. Yes. And we call a couple of them, we call them our team, our teen moms, because like one of them is still like she just had her second child and I swear she's not even 28. And I'm like, you're a teen mom. Like you're so young. Oh, my God. i Yeah, that's that's crazy to me. Like we have a few like that in our group, too, like that are just celebrating their 30th. And like what really tripped me up was that they were born in 1994 and something about that number just tripped me up because like my youngest friend, like I think of like in my personal life is Rachel. And she was born in 93. And I was like, OK, I can I can work with that. Like that's fine. But when yeah these 94.
00:01:35
Speaker
kids are turning 30. I was like, you're my youngest friend. I cannot go any younger. I am. It's messing with my head. It's so crazy. I and not to like already bring this to the Olympics, but in when I was watching the Olympics yesterday, I was watching swimming and they were talking about how no one in the pool at that time was born before the year 2000. And I was like, wow, I'm so old. Like, they are all so young. And I am I'm now at the point where, like, I watch the Olympics and like hardly anyone is my age. Like, they're all younger than me. No, they're already. What are you talking about? They're born 2000. I know. I'm just kidding. OK, I was like, Wendy, do you know I'm not computing? I'm not computing. Um, that's insane.
00:02:30
Speaker
Yeah, it's crazy. And how old is Simone? OK, Simone is old for the Olympics. She's 27. I looked it up yesterday because I was like, this is her third Olympics, which is that's what I was wondering. I'm like, yeah, she. especially in the gymnastics world, like that's ancient for the gymnastics world. How many did Shane Johnson compete in? Sean Johnson. Sean. What's your name? Sean. Sean, Sean, Sean. Shane. Who? Shane. um OK, she competed in two. I think. Yeah, yeah I'm pretty sure two of them. She lives here. She does. I love her and her husband. He's cute.
00:03:14
Speaker
I never run into them though, where are you at girl? Shane, what if I said hey Shane? You're like, oh my God, it's Shane Johnson if she's like who? Yeah, she's like, oh no, we're not friends. Do you ever, I don't think we've ever talked about this. Have you, do you ever see like famous people in, I feel like Nashville is like the new Hollywood, honestly. Um, there are a lot of people here and you just try not to bother them. I've seen them like here and there. I do not get out like I haven't gotten out in the past three years. So that's my fault. I think I would have the opportunity if I just like did things. Um, my latest encounter was like Reba McIntyre, but
00:03:56
Speaker
I was just out to eat for lunch one day and she was like walked in the restaurant. So that was like a big deal. I've seen Nicole Kidman, which was number like my number one celebrity sighting. um But yeah, they come and go be bopping around. I also I remember when you saw Nicole Kidman and I was like, holy shit, that's huge. I feel like she's a huge star. I mean, that was like a I couldn't talk moment. because she, we were at Virago, a sushi restaurant here in Nashville, and she sat in the booth literally next to us. Like Cassie's head was here and Nicole Kidman's head was here. Like they were touching hair and um, they were reading a script for God knows what. I mean, this was years ago, but it was just like, I could not speak. I was like stunned.
00:04:52
Speaker
Oh my gosh, that's so crazy. ah you know Well, we should, when I'm there next week, we should go on a scavenger hunt. We don't got time for that. yeah for imagine be so happyy I saw some famous people when I lived in New York. i who was the most famous. I saw Claire Danes on a run. She ran right past me. And that was like when I was obsessed with Homeland. Like I was. Oh, wow. She ran past me and I was I was. Did you faint? I was like. And then I met Emma Roberts at a music. Oh, yeah. That was a big deal. I have. ah Yeah, that was a big deal. I was like obsessed. And that was during American Horror Story. Mm hmm. Which one? Yeah.
00:05:41
Speaker
She was like huge at the time. um I remember being impressed with that one. I was like, damn, um she's cool. oh I've walked past the guy from the Big Bang Theory, the main character Sheldon.
00:05:55
Speaker
He, uh, I walked past him and so, and I remember him, like when I saw him, I was like, wow, you look so much more regular, regular than on TV. Like you look like such a normal dude. Like, I don't know. It was like, he didn't look like a nerdy character. Like I, he always does. Like I remember he had scruff and like, he had a hat on and I was like, Oh, and that's like shocking. Yeah. I don't know. I don't know. They're just people like us. They're just people like us. So funny. Well, I've been so excited to record today because we are in the middle of the Olympics and it has become my whole personality. So I need to talk about it. Are you watching? The video you posted of you like doing gymnastics was so funny.
00:06:46
Speaker
It is me. like I am that video. I'm saluting around my house. like I make my coffee and I'm like... And I am just obsessed with the Olympics. like And I really feel like our country needed this in this very moment. like It is so divided and... treacherous out there. So to have this moment of like togetherness where we're all like cheering and watching the same things, like it's so nice to have... i went I feel like my social media went from like toxic politics to like like patriotic
00:07:24
Speaker
yeah we energy where it's like, start your engines, that video. Literally, and I couldn't be happier with that change. um Are you watching? Have you been watching? So I have it on this background. like I'll like catch things here and there. like TikTok's really showing me the highlights. Honestly, I love the stuff with Snoop Dogg and like all the commentator stuff is so funny to me. But um yeah, I'm like catching things here and there. like
00:07:55
Speaker
Right now, the big thing is like that pummel guy that looks yeah like... Clark Kent. Clark Kent, yeah. And then he like got them the bronze or whatever. So all that's like kind of just been highlighted on my TikTok. But yeah, I have it on in the background. I wouldn't say like I'm like really tuned in, but it's fun to watch. It's so fun. It is also good background stuff. Cause like you don't really, you know, have to be clued in all the time. I was super clued in yesterday for the men's gymnastics team final. Like, you know, you guys know I work from home and for myself. So I literally worked from my bed right here. And on this TV, I watched it all live and it was the most exciting gymnastics I have watched in a really long time. Like they mentioned that like sometimes you're so used to watching women's at like,
00:08:46
Speaker
When you watch men, you're like, God, they go hard. like It's crazy. so like It's so wild. I was so sweaty when I was watching it. I was like, holy shit. like I was so nervous. For those of you that don't know, if you just want some gymnastics background, although if you watch Olympics, they kind of went over this. Men's gymnastics in the USA like has kind of taken a downturn over the past 10, 20 years. like um We hadn't won a medal a team medal since 2008. The US team was not favored to medal in this Olympics. like They were like projected to be fourth or fifth.
00:09:24
Speaker
and they pulled it out and won a bronze medal. They had the most incredible day of gymnastics like stuck landings like and the crowd was so hype like every time they stuck I have chills like literally goosebumps on my arm right now like every time they stuck a landing like the crowd went wild and like Snoop Dogg was like
00:09:47
Speaker
It was just so, it was so, it makes me emotional. It was just so exciting to watch. And I'm so happy that I got to watch it live. I was texting people who I know have like office jobs. And I was like, I don't know how you guys are there. Like I, my whole life revolves around the Olympics now. i I have to be here in front of my TV, so. As like a gymnast in your past, what is the hardest? Is it bars, vault, floor? And what's the other one? beam beam yeah so this is it honestly every gymnast is different i feel like there are two classes of gymnasts like there is like the more like power athletes and then there are the more well they're all powerful let's be but like there are those that are better at the power events which are floor and vault and then there are those that are better at the more like
00:10:42
Speaker
precision like beam and bars. like those I was very much so a vault and floor girl. i could Vault was my best event. I was doing vaults that were two levels above my current level. like that's I was always like way ahead. and i think i Probably if I had stuck with gymnastics all the way to senior year, I probably would have gone to college for gymnastics. And I probably wouldn't have been an all around athlete. I probably would have been like, I would have gotten a scholarship for just floor and vols, which is fine. Like that's just the way it goes. So um I personally think that bars is harder than beam. um but I think marvel hard like as an outsider looking in, bars looks hard just because like me personally, like I can't even do a pull up.
00:11:37
Speaker
The strength and control you have to have is insane. It's so insane. like Gymnastics is such an insane sport. I saw where someone yesterday who said that like floor and vault Maybe look easier, but it's harder to be the best at that because it's competitive um and like you do have to be powerful and fast and strong and stick the landings like whereas like um Beam and bars. It's just like that's just hard in itself. Yeah true
00:12:11
Speaker
It was true. i'll I'm so excited for the women's team final. It'll be so exciting to see. We've had some trouble on beam us women's, like that's our weakest event. I think we'll be fine because our difficulty is so hard on the other events that hopefully it will keep our scores high, but we'll see. We'll see. I'm so excited. but honestly Sean Johnson was good at was the beam. Bring back Shane. Bring back sha Shane. Shane 2028. Feels like 98. That's like a Tennessee thing. Feels like a weight. She was good at everything. She was a true all-around gymnast. Just like Simone Biles is a true all-around gymnast. And that's why they are legendary because most gymnasts are not all-around gymnasts. They kind of fall into those two buckets.
00:13:02
Speaker
So yeah, ah she was so she was so good at everything. She was incredible. um um But one of my favorite things about the Olympics is watching all the sports that like we never see on TV. Fencing, yeah. like I caught myself watching Fencing. And there was like one was called ball handling. I'm like, what the hell? Oh, handball. Handball, yeah. Ball handling. that That's what is good at. Candace? 10 out of 10. I quit gymnastics to go into ball handling. She's a professional juggler.
00:13:41
Speaker
Oh, my God. That is so ah funny. Yeah, like different things like that. And um yeah, just like switching, like, because it's all on Hulu and you're like can pick what you want to watch. And then, yeah, we also I've also been I love following all of the like breakout social media stars from the Olympics. If you or have you do have you seen Ilona Mar and have followed her? She's the rugby girl. Oh, yeah. Okay, so I feel like I was ahead of the game on that one. I have followed her, like when I followed her,
00:14:17
Speaker
I followed her probably two or three weeks ago. And when i I checked her account, like probably last Monday. So a week before the opening ceremonies and she had, I think like 300,000 followers. ah a lot So last Monday, before the open ceremony, she had like 300,000 followers and she now has 1.7 million followers in like literally a week's time. She is such a good follow. She's so like body positive as someone who also is like broad shouldered and muscular. It's so nice to hear her talk about that and like feel sexy and like the body positive about that. No, she's badass. She's so cool and so funny. Her all of her like love island stuff about the ah Olympic villa, as she calls it, is so funny.
00:15:14
Speaker
um It's just such a fun time. I love the Olympics so much. What'd you think about the opening ceremony? Okay, everyone is like very opinionated on this. I actually liked it. I don't know if I'm alone in this. I mean, I've definitely seen all the videos of what it was like in person and how like underwhelming it was. As someone who watched it on the television, I actually thought it was kind of cool. like I don't know. I thought it it definitely. I liked the boats. I thought that was kind of cool. Yeah. I'm seeing all the boats like I couldn't wait for the U.S. to roll up because it was I just knew it was going to be like hype. Yeah. A scene from Titanic. There's millions of people on that frickin boat like.
00:15:59
Speaker
represent and like and that's another thing so many people are like I would never wear the flag but something about the Olympics makes me want to be patriotic and I couldn't disagree more like I love I love like red white and blue like 4th of July is like my third personality I'd say Halloween's first and then me as a person and then 4th of July um I just love like it's such a summery thing but I don't know that kind of made me sad that people are like I would never support other than the Olympics, but, um, I thought it was weird. I was just very confused. I was like, there's a lot happening. Like it's just very like Cirque du Soleil to me. Like am I tripping? It was, I feel like they could have done a better job of like explaining like why certain things were happening. Like, I don't know. Sometimes they were like, did it give you PTSD seeing the Eiffel tower?
00:16:56
Speaker
No, I'm not kidding. i You know, I watched some of it with Vinny and I was like, is this like romanticizing Paris for you? Because it's romanticizing Paris for me to where like I'm like, should we go back? And then he was like, no. For me, it like kind of confirmed how like weird and quirky it is. like yeah I was just like, it's a mess. I would say, I think it was just the part with Celine singing from the Eiffel Tower, if you saw that. That was epic. She sounded insane and you know she is sick. so like Every performance of hers is like harder and could be her last.
00:17:35
Speaker
So I was just so freaking emotional like watching her and the lights coming from the Eiffel Tower. I was like, I love it there. Very epic. Now you love it. That's pretty epic for sure. So I don't know. I know a lot of people had opinions about it. I think they could have done a better job of like trying to explain what was happening and like why they're doing what they're doing. like There were some like dance numbers that I'm like, what's the point here I don't know i I feel like they could have done a better job explaining yeah it was all right yeah it was fine I think another thing that kind of threw me for a loop is if you watched it from the beginning like the whole beginning part was in the daylight and
00:18:23
Speaker
I don't know, I feel like I've watched a lot of, you know every opening ceremony since I've been alive and they're always like in the dark. And most of the time now that they're like in an arena or like something that has like cool, like I don't know, it was just kind of a strange. I wonder if they were trying to get the effect of like the Eiffel Tower turning on or something like did that on purpose yeah or maybe the boats took fucking forever. Who knows? Like they were rolling. It was it was funny because we did a and I never know how to say it. Is it the CNN send?
00:19:00
Speaker
I don't know, whatever the river. We did a river brunch while we were in Paris, and that was one of the best things we did because we were just contained in on a boat and had food and alcohol. But um the boat that we took, I'm like 99 percent sure it was used in the boat thing. Like it looked exactly like it. It's like how many they had to have had so many boats. Where do you get all of those? Damn, I'm like, had those lying around. Yeah. Damn, but okay. The one, one last thing about the Olympics and then we'll move on. Something that has made me so emotional as a parent now, like this, my first Olympics watching as a parent to watch all of these parents, like watch their kids live out their dreams and have all their hard work come to fruition. Like yeah they panned to the parents a lot to see their reactions to things and
00:19:55
Speaker
I am a puddle on the floor. like i The thought of watching one of my girls like live out that dream or to accomplish something they've worked towards their whole life, like as a parent, like I can't imagine being prouder. It just has to be the craziest feeling. Yeah. And like, so nerve wracking, like I would vomit. It'd be same. um yeah yeah That would be awesome. Like that is goals for sure. Yeah. um um I think we're both like big sports fans. So it's like, yeah, any, I don't know if they're good at anything. I'm going to be just like thrilled. And if they really like it and are passionate about it, but
00:20:36
Speaker
I know that and like Green's kind of into it. He is like, let's watch the Olympics. And so we'll watch it. It's not like long lived, but he's kind of into it. So it's kind of fun to like get him home and watch it for a little bit. And then he's like, all right, I'm over. Let's watch Batman or something. But it's kind of cute that he's recognizing that it's going on. Yeah, Alice has been into the gymnastics. She can now do a forward roll all by herself. Oh, that's good. Crazy. Yeah, I'll have to take a video of it and and send it to you. um We have been in gymnastics for three or four weeks now every Saturday. So she's definitely learning from there. But to watch it on the TV with her is such a cool experience as a someone who was a gymnast. Like I love it so much. And it's fun. It's just fun. I just love the Olympics so much.
00:21:26
Speaker
I know the summer ones are really fun to watch. I can't wait to do like, yeah watch more swimming and stuff. I like, I think that's one of my favorites to watch. Yeah. Cause it's fa god my heart is. Yeah. And my heart is racing and it's like, who touched the wall for so fun. Yeah. I'm watching the flags. I guess they're creeping up. It's just like, didn you mean yeah. to My mom is also doing something fun this weekend, so this can be an idea for future list you know future things for you to do. My mom is hosting an Olympics dinner on Saturday, where each of us have to pick a country and we have to bring a dish representing our country, and we're gonna watch you know whatever's on that night that Saturday. um So my country is Italy, and I'm making homemade arancini,
00:22:16
Speaker
Yeah, rice balls and a burrata salad. mom is My mom is Greece. ah Rob has chosen Japan. Ryan and Caitlin have chosen Germany. yeah So we'll see. I'm excited. We're going to have a little like global Olympics dinner party, which will be so fun. That sounds really fun. And I won an arancini in my mouth. OK, I'll send you one. Thank you.
00:22:45
Speaker
Oh, okay. Well, I want to get into the topic for today's episode. I feel like we've talked a lot on this show about like thinking about our pre baby life and what it was like and what we would say to ourselves, you know, if we could go back and talk to you know, myself a year before I had a baby and what I would say. And so that's what this episode is all about. We're going to talk about like what we would say to our pre-baby selves, a letter to our pre-baby selves. I kind of like went further back. Like, like, I don't know. It's like I reflected on my entire life before baby. It wasn't just like it wasn't like a pep talk. OK, mine is definitely like pep talky.
00:23:32
Speaker
no wonder you're but that' so positive Mine is like, this is gonna be amazing. yeah I mean, it definitely, I definitely touch on like some things that I wish I had like relished in more that like you're gonna miss basically. And I'm very honest in my little letter about like, you're gonna miss this. So like soak up every second. And I think it's fair to say if we're gonna talk to our younger cells that there are definitely aspects of our pre-baby life that we miss.
00:24:04
Speaker
Yeah, you know, um but there's also so many new things that have been added that I love so much. So it's complicated. It's a nice feelings for sure. And I I did mine when I was on a walk at like five a.m. and it was all dark out and um ominous. So I felt like. Am I a writer? I felt goofy writing it. We why? I don't know. I mean, i I say this in my letter, which I can get into if you want me to. But yeah, let's just do it. Let's just let's like you read your and we'll discuss and then I'll read mine and we'll discuss. Let me preface this by saying I do not claim to be a writer.
00:24:51
Speaker
I hated English in high school and in college. I literally had my husband, Chris, write one of my reports, like book reports for me in college. Like I despised it that much. Like I would do anything to get out of it. I also hate homework. So my eye my mind bounces around a lot. So hopefully this makes sense because it's all over the place. That's okay. No judgment.
00:25:18
Speaker
I'm excited. So I started with a letter of reflection is of self-reflection is hard for me. I don't love to be vulnerable. I'm not someone who goes deep into why I do things or why things happen for a certain reason or why or a certain way. So writing this feels like something new or something that I haven't done since I was a child when we kind of talked about journaling. And I guess this is why we're talking about this before I had children. So you right now,
00:25:50
Speaker
You have never really known responsibility. I feel like nothing really hard has happened. Tough times haven't happened either. You've lived a happy childhood. I've fell in and out of love many times and ended up with an amazing man. Really, I feel like those things happened for a reason, so I knew not to sell myself short. I feel like I went to two amazing schools and had great friends, so I could not complain. And then I feel like when I had children, that childhood ignorance was gone. I was the baby of the family, and I finally had to grow up. I had to become less selfish, responsible for two people who were counting on me, and I saw myself become strict and rigid and worrisome and something I had never been in my life. I couldn't be carefree, spontaneous, and it had made me think about this. And I've thought about this a few times over the last few weeks, um and I do miss that side of myself.
00:26:45
Speaker
And as I say those things, I do want to emphasize that I've never felt a greater calling than motherhood. I've never felt more passionate about two people in my entire life and I would never change a thing. I'm glad I grew up. You realize time is fleeting and days can be long and years can be short. And there's such a light and joy about being around babies and nothing compares to that moment I'm in right now. I do wish I had been more forgiving to people with children. But like I said, as the baby of the family, it was something that I never recognized or cared to recognize. I wish I had been nicer to the people around me with children because they are just trying their best. And don't be so hard on yourself. Your body that you had in your teens and twenties is gorgeous as they are now. You might come with more bumps and bruises and scars and stretch marks.
00:27:34
Speaker
Um, and then I write you have children later in life, which is 30, so not too late. So you've lived a lot of life alone or with your husband, Chris, we have been to. We've been together since we were 19 and living life and having fun and enjoying each other's presence, enjoying friends. And I feel like I don't have any regrets of any of those things. And I'm glad I had all that time alone with my husband. And I say all this because I thought doing those things were all that mattered in the world and that having a family meant that I was taking a pause on life when really it is the reason to live.
00:28:12
Speaker
the most rewarding favorite thing on the planet. And while you're judging from the other side, drinking every night, going out, going out to eat, you're now 33 in your house, cuddled up on the couch with your babies, enjoying their sweet laughs, chasing each other. Oh God, I'm going to cry now. I know Whitney, this is so sweet. Oh my God, I'm literally sobbing. OK, I'm chasing each other around the house. And while times can be tough because you're raising little ones, it is the best thing you have to look forward to. and you will forever be changed into the person you were meant to be, the greatest gift on earth. Okay, that's all. Oh my God, Whitney! I'm so proud of you. Like, that is such... No, like, I'm genuine. like i
00:28:59
Speaker
Like I know you don't like to talk about like sad or serious or like you don't like deep is not it's not mean and well It's not like natural for you and I just want to say thank you for Sharing that and writing it because that was so good. You were talking about it being negative. That is not negative Okay, I just felt like I kind of dipped into a little bit of, I don't know, some of the, like I genuinely think this is like the hardest thing I've ever done in my entire life, but it's, and I don't and i don't want that to seem negative. Like that's why I said that. Like I feel like it is, it woke me up in a way. Like I, this is my second act on life and it's way better than like you could ever imagine, you know? And that was hard. I had to like read and try not to cry.
00:29:55
Speaker
Whitney, that was so good. I know that you don't like to think that you're a writer, but that was so good. Oh, thanks. Oh my gosh, I feel like you touch reading or you reading yours. I'm like, oh shit, there's things I forgot. Like what? i'm like yeah Well, no, like you're so right about like, ah especially the part about like Chris and everything you guys did and how much life you live. Like, I don't think I mentioned many at all. and Well, I like to think of my 20s as Chris. like Him and I had our 20s together, and it was just like me and him against the world. and like I have no regrets doing all that with just him. like I know him in that way, and then it's like our 30s are all about family. and you know i mean Obviously, the rest of our life, but it's like we're being needed. We're pulled apart a little bit, so it's like I'm just glad I had
00:30:55
Speaker
It's so true. I feel like we need to send this episode to people who are like not yet pregnant. like I know this is an episode for moms, but honestly, this is a great episode for people who haven't had kids yet and are like maybe waiting on that season or trying for that season. And really, i mean I feel like that is a lot of how I felt when I had my first child. like It was like a 360. My world was completely flipped and changed. like I don't feel that as much with two because i've I'm already in it and I'm living it every day. like It's not that significant of a difference. but
00:31:37
Speaker
yeah Um, it was definitely a jolt into responsibility with Graydon. Um, and I was scared. I just loved him so much. I was scared for anything to happen yeah for him to ever be sick. Like I was just nervous Nellie. Um, and yeah, it's kind of like weird to think about all that. Yeah. Totally. I love though that you are self-aware enough to be like, Oh, I've like, I had to grow up and like, I, I don't know. That's a very self-aware thing to admit, I guess. Like, I don't know. That's just, I love you so much. That was so good. ah Thanks. Your turn. Let's stop talking about me now. She's like, I want to move on. Yeah, please. I feel like mine's kind of long.
00:32:28
Speaker
It felt like I was talking forever. ah guy Okay. Hopefully I won't cry. I mean, I cried. It's fine. It's embarrassing. Do not throw a shot like you did with Shannon. I won't. um mine i feel like is a little more like I feel like I'm giving myself up my pre-baby self a pep talk, so whatever. All right, dear pre-baby self, as I sit down to write this letter, I can't help but smile, thinking about the journey you're about to embark on. Right now, you might be feeling a mix of excitement and uncertainty, and that's completely okay. Motherhood is a beautiful, wild ride that will change your life in ways you can't even imagine.
00:33:12
Speaker
First, I want to remind you to be kind to yourself. You will make mistakes and there will be moments when you feel overwhelmed, but that's all part of the journey. Every challenge you face will teach you something valuable and you'll come out stronger on the other side. Before the kids arrive, there are a few things you might be taking for granted that I want you to relish in right now. those quiet mornings with a cup of coffee and a book, spontaneous trips, those don't get out of bed hangover days, and even those long uninterrupted showers will soon become luxuries. Cherish these moments of solitude, but know that the chaos and noise that replace them will fill your heart in ways you never expected.
00:33:57
Speaker
And let's talk about your body. It's so hot. i know I know you already love to walk around naked, but genuinely you should do it more. i let you could you do it more but you say I want you to stop hating on the photos of yourself or picking yourself apart in the mirror. I want you to know that loving yourself will be the greatest tool in motherhood. No one's love kindness and support is more important than your own. Also, your body will still be so hot after you have kids. Be kind to it as it will bring you the most gorgeous humans to ever exist.
00:34:34
Speaker
You'll learn that motherhood is not about perfection. It's about showing up every day, loving fiercely, and being present. Your worth will no longer be tied up to how much money you make or how many tasks you can get done in a day. Your kids will teach you more about patience, resilience, and unconditional love than you ever thought possible. They'll see you as their superhero, and in their eyes, you'll find the strength to keep going, even on the toughest days. God, here I go. i know ah There will be times when you'll feel like you've lost yourself in the demands of motherhood, but you'll also discover a new version of yourself, stronger, more compassionate, and more connected to the world around you. You'll find joy in the simplest things, a baby's first laugh, a child's curiosity, and the quiet moments of togetherness that make all the sleepless nights worth it.
00:35:28
Speaker
Remember to lean on your support system. Friends, family, and even strangers who have walked the path before you will offer invaluable advice and comfort. You don't have to do it alone, and asking for help is a sign of strength, not weakness. You are going to build the greatest community of moms with your best friends that is going to add so much passion to your life. Mom group chat will light up your life in a way that you desperately need in motherhood. It will help heal you in hard times, Oh God, here I go. I know you're making me cry. yeah It will help heal you in hard times, make you feel seen in times that you feel invisible and hold you up when you feel like you can't stand anymore.
00:36:13
Speaker
As you navigate this new chapter, don't forget to carve out time for yourself. Your wellbeing is crucial, not just for you, but for your family. Self-care is not a luxury, it's a necessity. You'll find that by taking care of yourself, you're better equipped to take care of your little ones. I'm almost done, I swear. Lastly, embrace the joy and wonder that comes with raising children. Their laughter, the endless questions, and their boundless energy will fill your home with the magic that words can't capture. You're about to experience love in its purest form and it will be the greatest adventure of your life. You've got this. Trust in yourself and know that every step you take is leading you to a future filled with more love and happiness that you can imagine. You are a goddess. You hold all the tools to be the best mom in the world.
00:37:06
Speaker
Oh, my God. That was amazing. Wow. I'm emotional. um Everything you said is so spot on. I mean, every part of it. We definitely need to post these somewhere. I feel like they're a good read if you need a a mental reset. That's what doing this exercise like did for me, it like reset my mind a little bit. Yeah, sometimes you need to hear those things like, cause I feel like we both are in that like nose to the ground, get everything done that you can. We're in this busy, busy stage and like sitting down and like making yourself write this and like, give yourself that pep talk. Like honestly that I needed that pep talk today. Like no matter what, like even like.
00:37:58
Speaker
talking body image now, like I need to being kinder to myself, like yeah your self worth and all that. Like, Oh my gosh, so spot on with everything. And so sweet. Oh my God. Having like their laughter, filling up your home is so true. It's the best thing in the world. It is, and it's so like it so like you said, with this phase of us being like nose to the ground, like it's so easy for that like part to be dimmed by the like chaos of everything going on. And sometimes you just have to like refocus on the positive stuff. I know, I think happy that we did this exercise for real.
00:38:45
Speaker
I know. That was really sweet. I loved yours. um Thanks. I loved yours. Good. I know yours is so good. um You were such a good writer. I was going to say, like I feel like as Margot's approaching one, I feel like I think I've said this like recently, too. like Everything is lifting. like I don't have to really like, I mean, I keep my eye on her, obviously. like I'm scared of her to go up the stairs without me type of thing. but like things are lifting a little and I feel massive like coming back in a way. Yeah. And I'm like I felt that way over the weekend. um I don't know. Is there like any twinge of like sadness there or like are you you're scared that this like baby phase is over or no?
00:39:38
Speaker
No, I'm such a like toddler mom. I'm so happy. Like I love playing with them. That is just like so much more me. um I I'm just like so happy in the phase and like she's so cute and great and so fun and he's like self-sufficient like this is so more my speed. um I feel way more comfortable at this whole level. I feel less stressed out. I'm like way more myself. um This is just like the best part for me. Oh, I can't believe Margo is going to be a year old. Can you give us a little? I know, but it's exciting and such a fun time. Can you give us like a ah little bit about her party? Like, tell us what you're doing to celebrate. And I do. I want to say, too, though, like before I go into that was like,
00:40:34
Speaker
When you're in those like newborn stages, my mom was telling me, she's like, every time you talk on the pod, you really don't like the newborn stage. I'm like, I know. I mean, I'm really drilling that home, aren't I? um But I was telling Candace the other day, it's like, I'm becoming such a mush thinking about it because those early days, like all you do is wish away time. Like you just want them to be older. You want them to get sleep through the night. You want them to like hold their own bottle. And it's just like I'm here and it's like, whoa, it goes by so fast. And it's like what everyone says. It's just a phase in time. um Anyway, it's just like crazy. Like you kind of wish away time a little bit. And now you're like, whoa, whoa, whoa.
00:41:14
Speaker
We're here. We're in the good part. Like, slow down. Like, don't get too big, you know? and Yeah. um So, her party is in like a month and we're it's garden themed. I'm just doing a like a little look how I've grown theme. So cute. And really, I need to get on it so bad. Like, I have like ideas in Pinterest boards galore going mood boards, but have I ordered anything? No, I am slow. I've ordered like a bounce house, which we had for Grains. It's just a small little one since it's for her, even though all the kids that are coming are three plus. like yeah So I'm just like, oops. Hope they had fun with that. um It's going to be like smack down i know twenty four in there for real, dude. I'm like,
00:42:05
Speaker
Well, good thing Chris is in the medical field for real. Who knows what's going to happen with that? But like and then I I had like this little text thing that I I painted just kind of just match the aesthetic of the party. So I've like done little things here and there. But other than that, like. I have got to get on it this week, literally this week. I need to order like, um, I can do like all the flowers and stuff like the, that weekend. That shouldn't be and a problem, but it's like, I have ideas all over the place. I cannot like.
00:42:38
Speaker
I'm just not good at this part. like my I have so many ideas. I can't pull it together. yeah um i am One of my good friends, our good friends, Taylor, she is like into party planning and I was like, I need your advice. And she said, just focus on one area that you want to look aesthetically pleasing. like Just one little area where you want people to take pictures. like The rest doesn't matter. Just your focus on one. I know. And I was like, that is such good advice. Like make one little area. Look how you want it to look. Take your pictures there. And then who gives a shit about the rest? Yeah, like that's so true. Not everything has to be perfectly placed.
00:43:16
Speaker
You don't have to have the fancy foods. like You can order it from Publix or whatever the hell you want to get. like Not everything has to be beautiful, and but she's like, as long as you've got that one spot, you're good. So I'm like, okay, I'm going to focus on where she's going to be eating cake, and I'm going to make that the little cute area. That's such good advice, actually. Like I think I for Alice's Alice in Wonderland party, like I think I tried to do like exactly things and I was stressed. It's like it kind of burned you out when you think about all those things, but it's like I'm going to have a little soft play area and I like painted that and I'm going to have the bounce out house and then we have the rest is kind of just like whatever a little drink station food station.
00:44:01
Speaker
um But yeah. So cute. Well, I can't wait to see it. I know you have such amazing like taste and vision. So I know it's going to be the cutest party ever. And I can't wait to see pics. Yeah. Do I fly in for it? Back to back. Vinny actually this weekend I like redid the three calendars on our fridge and I have three like every month for the next three months I have like a weekend trip. Oh what are you doing? coming I'm coming to you and then I'm going to Charlotte to see nice Mackenzie we're gonna do the weekend at the lake just the two of us for like a little um
00:44:43
Speaker
Oh, that's nice. friendship trip Yeah. And I was like, I was like, I really am in need of like a, like a sleepy vacation. Yeah. Yeah. Like where we're not doing anything. Like like can i feel like a kind of rare, just y'all two together, like sometimes home Mark and, and Eddie and all them are with y'all. So it's like, wow, this is going to be fun. Yeah. So I have that. And it's also in September, like it's the second weekend of September, which is Vinnie's doing his GC course. So he, I will be alone with the kids every weekend. So my mom, my mom was actually the one who encouraged me to do it. She was like, I think this was back when I was
00:45:24
Speaker
feeling very emotional a couple weeks ago. And she was like, you should that month when you have the kids by yourself, like on the weekends, like do a weekend trip and I'll keep the girls for the weekend. And I know so nice. So I'm doing that in September and then in October is Taylor Swift in Miami. So I'll be gone. Wow, that's already coming up. Dude, it's crazy. The year is fine. Like Halloween is already on our fridge. But it's just like we I remember y'all buying those tickets like this time last year or something. Yeah. Yeah. Mm hmm. Wow. Crazy. Yeah. um I also on that same calendar put like Alice's like trunk or treat thing at school. Oh my God. That is the cutest thing ever, by the way. I know. I already like I'm starting to brainstorm what I want my trunk to look like. Oh, well yeah.
00:46:15
Speaker
Well, actually, I think I might. We'll see. I don't know. I started to like really go off the rails and think about switching cars with Vinny for that day and making his trunk, but his truck bed like something really cool, like a pool or something. And I was like, Reel it in. Reel it in, Candice. They won't even be able to see it. It's too high off the ground. Yeah. um yeah i they know They did that for the first time. Yeah, they did that for the first time last year for Graydon. But I was like, two months postpartum and I was like, I cannot participate. So we just like dressed them up and did it. But like this year, maybe I'm feeling jazzy and I can do that. Well, this has been so fun and sweet. I have a runny nose now from crying. I know. But this was so sweet. I appreciate you getting deep with me. I know it you don't like it.
00:47:07
Speaker
You're welcome. It's just for everyone to hear my deepest thoughts. Love that. Oh, my gosh. um I'm so excited for our episode. We're going to record, I think, next, which is the advice. We're going to do motherly advice. We got some really good submissions. I'm excited to discuss those. And then while Whitney and I are together next week, we're going to do a how well do we know each other episode? This is gonna be so funny. I mean, I'm so excited. I'm so excited. um So yeah, stay tuned for all of those. And yeah, I love you. I love you. Okay, bye. Thank you so much for being a part of our mom group chat. New episodes drop every Tuesday. And don't forget, the group chat is blowing up on our Instagram page. So make sure you're following along over there. All right, gotta go. My toddler just put something in her mouth.