Become a Creator today!Start creating today - Share your story with the world!
Start for free
00:00:00
00:00:01
Ep. 275 – Blue Balls Yield Black Lungs
2 Plays4 seconds ago
This week we’re checking out some r/christiandating and r/christianmarriage posts about leaving your boyfriend/husband. Then we’re discussing “Dr” David E. Clarke, a Christian psychologist of dubious credentials who has authored 17 books and gives some very concerning relationship and parenting advice. A so-called expert on narcissists (or “narcs” as he insists on calling them), Dr Clarke proports to diagnose your partner’s narcissism and tell you which of his books will fix all of your problems over the course of a 45 minute “advice session” phone call. What an incredible spiritual gift, huh? So lock your narc out of the house and enjoy the show!
Recommended
Transcript
Vape Culture and Car Custody
00:00:00
Speaker
yeah So that's one scenario. The other scenario is ah he's a flat brim basketball jersey wearing vape store guy that does smoke tricks. Oh yeah. vape goon Hashtag vape goons.
00:00:13
Speaker
yeah yeah Yeah. If he's a vape goon, i so she shouldn't she's giving him too much clemency here if he's a vape goon. She needs to leave him and they just split custody on the Dodge Charger.
Introduction to 'Growing Up Christian' Podcast
00:00:25
Speaker
He's just like blowing O's and putting his hand through it
00:00:47
Speaker
Hey everybody, welcome to another episode of Growing Up Christian. I'm Sam. And I'm Casey. And for the first time, dude, I almost said I'm Casey as I was looking at you while I was saying I was that was close.
00:01:00
Speaker
You can. You can pull in for me on that if you want. It hasn't happened yet. And then I was like, if I said I'm Casey, would he have accidentally said I'm Sam? And we would have just rolled through it like nothing happened. That would have been fun. It's a possibility at this point. you Right. If I just said it and then you were like, I'm Sam. And then we just moved.
00:01:17
Speaker
move through it.
Consumer Responsibility and Media Influence
00:01:18
Speaker
Um, we have a lot of little things that we wanted to discuss tonight. Casey found a bunch of things. Casey and I found a bunch of things that tickled our fancy. Um, but look, I like to start off with the bad news.
00:01:32
Speaker
Um, And, you know, we'll get to what we can tonight with the good news. And there's a lot of good news, a lot of gospel out there, a lot of Reddit gospel, Internet gospel. I'm just a big fan of gospel, however ways I can take it. But, Casey, I i that i saw this and, you know, I know how, like I know how high you set your standards,
Kratom Industry and Government Relations
00:02:00
Speaker
right? I know you like to vote with your dollar. I know how important voting with your dollar is hard to you.
00:02:06
Speaker
Yep. That's me. But um I came across this article, more like an Instagram post. I didn't read the article. I don't need to. ah I trust the source. It's from Perfect Union.
00:02:22
Speaker
ah The Trump administration is helping a company that sells addictive drug known as Kratom after the Department of Homeland Security Secretary Mullins invested one million dollars.
00:02:37
Speaker
good they have to overrule the state level i know they're making faulary you're very so you're very sad about the uh the the kansas the kansas ruling on kratom but uh just a ah brief little blurb on what's happening is after trump nominated him to lead the democratic nope sorry uh just saying words that begin with the letter d when i read the letter d uh After Trump nominated him to lead the Department of Homeland Security, Secretary Mark Wayne Mullen listed a $1 million dollar investment in credo in ah in a Kratom company called Botanic Tonics.
Synthetic Kratom vs. Synthetic Marijuana
00:03:19
Speaker
um How do you feel knowing that the same kind of person who is Mark Wayne, one word, by the way, I actually didn't know that until I read it.
00:03:30
Speaker
mark wane Mark Wayne mark waynewane is one word. Like dark wing duck. Like Mark Yeah. our queen duck Mark Wayne Mullin. Yeah, it's nuts. ah According to... Thank you.
00:03:53
Speaker
It's so stupid. I don't even think it's that you laugh. it When you laugh at things, it makes me laugh. I don't It's just hard to move past. According to an investigation by the New York Times, which honestly, who cares about the New York Times anymore? They're just an Israel shill at this point. yeah
00:04:17
Speaker
been ah leading a leading force in the influence campaign sponsored by the Kratom industry to get the Trump administration to obfuscate warnings about Kratom while stomping out its competition. Ooh, what's the Kratom competition?
00:04:35
Speaker
Hmm. Well, I don't know what the national thing is. I know at the state level here. So hold on. It says Kratom is a gas station drug that can be consumed in powder, capsules, gummies and drinks. And that you're I mean, your entire life is just garbage.
00:05:00
Speaker
whatever you can get at a gas station. I love gas station products.
00:05:08
Speaker
I was born a little Debbie and I've grown into a bigger Debbie. It is a gas station drug for sure. it is it it is for the consumer of like NOS energy drinks. Yeah.
00:05:23
Speaker
sorry but what Sorry to cut you off. The Kratom competition. What is the competition? So the the whole thing with it here and why they they're like ah banning it.
00:05:35
Speaker
So apparently... one of the like compounds in like natural Kratom, you know, cause it's just ground up plant material basically.
Personal Reflections on Addiction
00:05:45
Speaker
And it's like real true form, but like they figured out people apparently like figured out a ways to isolate, like the compound in it that gives you like a euphoric rush or whatever. And they concentrate it and make like basically a tincture or something. And then they produce it synthetically almost kind of, it's a little like a,
00:06:05
Speaker
you know when people conflated like weed with K2 and spice back in the day, it's kind of a similar situation. So whatever the synthetic crap is or the like tinctures and stuff that they that they synthesize...
00:06:19
Speaker
from kratom apparently it's really dangerous and people are like overdosing on it and all sorts of things i don't know if it's a lot of people but it's enough to where it's take you know people are taking notice of it yeah so like yeah i i think uh if you are fixing to get into kratom which i don't think is probably a good idea unless you're addicted to opiates or something like like Don't pick up a new habit. People keep offering me zins, and I'm like, i dude, I cannot.
00:06:47
Speaker
I can't have a new habit. I know all I like it. I can't touch those. Yeah, you shouldn't touch them. I could see those just taking over your personality.
00:06:58
Speaker
Because you weren't you know you've never been – like when when we were in college, I i was a cigarette bummer. I could i can smoke a cigarette.
00:07:09
Speaker
Never get addicted. I've never been addicted to cigarettes. I'm not. I've dabbled with it. I mean, it's probably been ah well over in the past year. I've probably bummed one or two. Like it's it's very infrequent. um But cigarettes have ah never turned into a thing for me. But it's also alcoholism is more your jam. Yeah, for sure. The inconveni the reason cigarettes are such, and they're just an inconvenience because it's 2026. You smell disgusting. Your breath is gross. You don't want to set a bad example for your children.
00:07:46
Speaker
um you know Other things are easier to hide. you know I can drink when my kids go to bed. I guess I could smoke too, but then you just like go to bed and you smell gross. It's gross. Smoking is gross. We've moved past as society. We found new ways to ingest our nicotine.
00:08:01
Speaker
um Uh, so, and if you smoke, look, it's great too. I love it. I wish I could do it. If I've, I, I, I think about these things in my life, which are these are dumb things to think about, but like, these are the, you do think about these things when you have a lot to lose, you know, family, wife, kids,
Family Ties and Reckless Behavior
00:08:22
Speaker
all that. and you go, what, what would like you, you worry, like, you know,
00:08:26
Speaker
Uh, my wife could be coming home from picking up the kids somewhere and I call and she doesn't answer. And then I call and she doesn't answer. and I go, great. I don't have a family anymore. Everything's done. My life is over as I know it. And you go down that like doom spiral for no reason. you' Like i wish I had a cigarette.
00:08:43
Speaker
yeah Yeah. No, but I, you know, occasionally you get those ideas. like, i I had a conversation even about this type of situation with people at work. And I go, if there's something I know about myself, it's that I don't have a strong sense of personal responsibility.
00:08:58
Speaker
My sense of responsibility is and is inherently tied to the people I love and care about. So like, if I woke up alone, i would I would just do things. I would probably start smoking. I would probably start drinking in the early afternoon. And then that would eventually turn into late morning. Like there's a good chance that I, I I'm aware, like I feel like it it sounds like I'm really dogging on myself. And I also feel like if my wife heard me talk like this, she'd be like, are you really that person? I'm just saying, like, i i find all my value in, in, in how much I find life worth living in the people I love.
00:09:44
Speaker
um And I don't have that kind of love for myself. Duh. A lot of people don't. I find it in sports betting. Yeah. So I don't know. Anyway, all that to say, what what am I saying? Why am I saying all this? I don't i don't know. Um, but anyway, smoking's great. And I would do it if I was completely alone and I didn't have to be responsible to anybody else. Uh, that being said, you never cared about stuff like that. You're like, I don't want to smoke. Smoking's kind of gross. It's a little bit yucky, a little too sinful for you back in college. Um,
00:10:16
Speaker
Zins is like, dude, you just pop in a little, uh, little, uh, what do you, what, what, little little packet right up in the side there dude i could see you just being like oh i found my thing that i'm going to like you would it wouldn't take you long to get the neon zin sign hanging behind you in your little recording myself ah a flat brim waggle hat and a travis matthew polo be like growing a mud flap out the back and a mustache ironically you like a a saturday golf course deadbeat dad draft king guy change your reddit account to lil nicky
00:10:57
Speaker
Yeah, I could I could tumble down a pathway, but that's that's always going to be like that will always be the most dangerous stuff for me is literally something that I can go to quick trip and buy for five dollars like that. That's what will kill me eventually.
00:11:12
Speaker
Yeah, which i would i bet I bet the long-term studies on all the other ah recreational gas station activities that you partake in I bet all of those studies are going to be worse than Zin's.
00:11:28
Speaker
Well... I ate ghost cereal for dinner, and now I'm drinking a ghost drink in front of you. so That's nice. don't know. You've got the makings of a ah lawsuit here, I think. Is that the same brand? Ghost drink, ghost energy, and ghost cereal? Okay, the ghost Lucky Charms cereal is so good, I can't stop eating it. like I have to limit how much of it I eat per week, because I could eat it like once a day for sure.
00:11:55
Speaker
did When I hear you talk about cereal like that, I'm like, just just start using nicotine pouches. i don't like you know. It's it's literally like it's less limp like it's less gross and trashy for me at this point to just smoke cigarettes than to like keep drinking and like Monster until my teeth rot out and I die of some sort of...
00:12:17
Speaker
I I'm going to be a guy who dies of congenital like heart failure, but it'll be because of a dental problem. Yeah. Like a, like a Springer spaniel.
Influencer Culture and Oliver Tree's Impact
00:12:27
Speaker
yeah it yeah if You're, you're, you're actually, you're actually, I feel like a, like a, like a,
00:12:41
Speaker
like a medical anomaly. I feel like, I feel like you're the kind of guy who goes and gets a physical every year. And they're like, Jesus Christ, dude, what are you doing? You're you've you like, I don't know. I'm really sorry. They're like, no no, you look awesome.
00:12:55
Speaker
And you're like, what? What? You're like, your blood pressure is fine. You're ah that like, all lab results coming in clear. Yeah. I got a compliment today.
00:13:07
Speaker
I get like three compliments a year, so like it's noteworthy. But I was at ah Sierra earlier and the cashier was like, this is kind of weird to say, but you have really nice skin.
00:13:19
Speaker
o And i you yes I just went, what? She's like, it looks like you take care of it. I'm like, oh. Well, thank you. i that's that's not I don't very well, but thank you.
00:13:34
Speaker
You were just like, look, you want to know my secret? Facials. Come facials. That shit keeps you clear. du You could see my head going down the conveyor belt at Krispy Kreme.
00:13:51
Speaker
You'd get more compliments if we had more of our gay friends back on the pod, dude. They all want to fuck you. Yeah, they they like me. It's nice. It's cute. I like it. That's why I can't go to Brazil.
00:14:03
Speaker
yeah You'll get your cheeks clapped against your will. It's like the Mad Max wasteland down there. It's nothing but leather chaps and the humongous rules the wasteland. ah a Speaking of which, i like an artist that I like died today yesterday in Brazil.
00:14:30
Speaker
Oh, really?
Charlie Kirk in Gospel Tracts
00:14:31
Speaker
Do you know who Oliver Tree is? Oh, yeah. head on or I actually don't know any of his music why that yeah I heard about the story which is crazy the helicopter crashes he died in a helicopter do you think he went Kobe on his way down I'm sorry we can we can only hope it would kind of fit with his brand like he did a lot of like nonsensical ah weird ah meme related branding stuff yeah I I
00:15:06
Speaker
I saw him like listed as like music, music artist, but I don't know. He, I saw the way he looked and was like, he seems like he has like more like, he has got Instagram personality vibes, like it's like online personality. Like I don't, I don't really know anything about him. I don't think I'd pick out music. Does he have music on the radio? Is he, is there anything mainstream about him? there anything I should know? Okay. mean, I think he has like a pretty decent amount of like monthly listeners and stuff on Spotify. Let's see real quick. But I actually, so April and one time we went with another dude and we, we drove like clear to Dallas to see him live.
00:15:43
Speaker
Oh really? Yeah. It was really fun. was like kind of an odd thing. I probably wouldn't do again. Yeah. But that makes you a real fan. Like that's not a, you know, it's not just like I followed him on Instagram and thought it was interesting. Like that's like, yeah, you were like actually invested.
00:16:00
Speaker
He's got 17 million monthly listeners. Oh wow. Wow. Why do I not know? what for whether yeah It's a lot of like... I think he's like big on TikTok and stuff like that. Yeah. but Speaking of influential personalities, I got a ah very like a... You know, there's a lot of different methodologies when it comes to gospel tracks.
00:16:26
Speaker
Christian direct mail that's like evangelical in nature and whatnot. But I got a... particularly attention-getting gospel message last week.
00:16:38
Speaker
kind And it's hand-sketched picture of Charlie Kirk. Probably AI, i guess, but like... it's like someones put there's Someone put a lot of passion into that. I don't think it's AI.
00:16:52
Speaker
And it says, the shot heard round the world. Oh, God, come on. how do we I don't even know if anyone really heard it ah because the autopsy was bunk and they buried him under cement three days later. I don't know. I mean...
00:17:06
Speaker
Was there shot? Maybe it was a shot that was pumped through the speakers. i don't The lapel mic explosion heard around the world. yeah It says, Charlie Kirk was shot for his courage to speak the truth. He stood for freedom and was not afraid to speak of his faith in Jesus Christ. The whole world now knows about Charlie's courage to stand for his faith.
00:17:30
Speaker
And then it's all Bible verses from there. but Okay. What is the point of this? What are they selling or soliciting? I think it's just a ah gospel track, basically. Just informational? of Bible verses. It was sent by Thessalonica Press.
00:17:50
Speaker
So Thessalonica. Yeah, that's, I don't know why they... It's like in three separate words. Yeah, I don't know. Very clever. I don't think Thessalonica was already trademarked. I mean, they could have just used that probably. That's weird. They probably thought they were pretty funny sending that.
00:18:09
Speaker
du The back of it says... I don't... it the
00:18:16
Speaker
the The using of Charlie Kirk... to try to continue, like, to try to continue, like, that, his, like, legacy by using him in, like, mailers and stuff. Like, it just feels, like, I feel like people already kind of forgot about him. Like, he, you know he wasn't as big of a deal or as influential as the, you know, the right wingosphere made him out to be or that he maybe be appeared to be because of his prevalence on TikTok.
00:18:50
Speaker
Yeah. like he After he died, it was like, I guess we're done with him. It's not like his quotes live on. It's not like people are like, I don't know. He's in my feed constantly. I guess that's the difference. Charlie Kirk related ah stuff. I guess it's mostly it it's mostly theories about who actually killed him and what part of Israel they were from.
00:19:14
Speaker
Yeah. Well, OK. So, again, it's not about his legacy. It's just yeah about ah whether and like he's. There's no, I don't know. the it's It's funny because he's making textbooks for outside of like, you know, middle America outside of like, you know, Illinois and Louisiana. And I don't think, I don't know. I don't think people are paying that much attention.
00:19:38
Speaker
I didn't really think of him as like a particularly like important or influential figure on the right.
Critique of Modern Comedy Specials
00:19:43
Speaker
yeah Maybe it was just because I wasn't tuned into it. like I knew who he was, and he would pop up in like news stories and stuff, that i you know commentator videos that I watched here and there.
00:19:52
Speaker
But like I didn't see him as being like... you know, this is the the new Rush Limbaugh, you know? Right. They kind of acted like he is after the fact. Maybe he was, you know? I just i think it's probably it for a younger generation than us, but... He was ah what's what's this what's the YouTube channel that always throws someone into a debate with, like, 20 people? Oh, Jubilee? Yeah. Yeah, it's like that.
00:20:20
Speaker
It was like he started that idea in Jubilee. He was like, let's do that, but for real. And not even for real, because who just, Tim something, who just ruined their, like, basically their career. We talked about him couple of times, actually. Dave Rubin. Dave Rubin.
00:20:38
Speaker
Yeah, we don't have to get back that. that's after... ah Oh, Jordan Peterson went on there and got wrecked for yeah christian one Christian versus 20 atheists. It's kind of like the elephant graveyard for has-been conservative commentators.
00:20:54
Speaker
Yeah, yeah. i And then there was... um I saw... that Was it Too Lazy to Try or American Redact? that did a but they though Both those guys are similar.
00:21:06
Speaker
Both good channels. Yeah, great channels. ah They go hard in the paint on Rogan, which is something I've always loved. um Just because of my general distaste for him over the decades.
00:21:22
Speaker
ah But...
00:21:26
Speaker
Did you see, uh, I don't want to go too far down this rabbit hole, but, uh, Tony Hinchcliffe put out a new special. Yeah. Oh, oh my God.
00:21:38
Speaker
I haven't watched any thing on it. It is night. ah It's nightmarishly embarrassing. um watch it if you want it it's just i'm what i'm tired of is like this whole like comedy's under attack from these like oh comedy well you can't say you can literally say anything you want and i think that's been proven time and time again and the only thing that you're gonna do is lose like maybe left-leaning fans on certain things but oh my god dude oh my god
00:22:11
Speaker
Tony Hinchcliffe. What is I don't know what Netflix is doing. I don't know what they're doing because he has a huge fan base. I mean, it does. Dude, the crowd, the crowd doesn't really i like what I don't know why they put that out.
00:22:30
Speaker
The crowd doesn't really care that much. up I feel like it's embarrassing. It was really bad. It was one of the worst specials ever. And it's not because I'm like, you don't have to be easily. It's not about being offended. It's about like, yes, it's either it's funny or it's not bad at comedy. And it's about like, like the cringiest, most offensive thing about it is how unfunny it is Like it's, it's just middle school boy humor, like middle school boy, racist jokes. It's like,
00:22:59
Speaker
i whatever for the fuck of proving my point it's just like he has got this whole like bit on like how black guys like eating chicken and you're like are you 12 my god like it's it's hard to listen to i think he's one of those guys that like his show is popular yes he's he's the central figure on this show that's really popular but like People don't go there because they're like, oh, Tony Hinchcliffe's involved. I'm watching that. Like, I think it's a mis they're mistaking like him having some level of prestige for like that show being really popular. Yeah. I think even like I know some some of the guys I know that listen to Kill Tony all the time. Like, I don't think they particularly love Tony Hinchcliffe. They just like the the format of that show and how it works. but Which is yeah
00:23:53
Speaker
But Tony blew up a set. Like, I mean, he was um his podcast was big anyway, but like ah doing the roast of Tom Brady was really good for him.
00:24:04
Speaker
um that That helped a lot. That type of humor is like what he excels at. Yeah. No, but it's like that specific format and audience, you know? Yeah. I've seen him live before.
00:24:20
Speaker
Oh, really? hmm. was just abrasive. He dresses like Woody from Toy Story. Yeah, he still does. um Yeah, I don't know. I just it was it.
00:24:33
Speaker
Comedy is in a weird spot. what but I just don't like watching a lot of comedy specials anymore. I just I don't even i you i used to have faith that like when a comedy special came out that it like.
00:24:47
Speaker
met a certain level. It went through a certain level of quality control. And then i feel like with like Netflix and Hulu and Amazon all like competing to be the network to bring you comedy, they just started like...
00:25:03
Speaker
It's like they just green light too much shit. And like when back when like the the highest accolade available was getting an HBO hour in comedy, you might have got they might have done a couple a year, a few a year. Yeah, right. Like. Now, like, everybody and their mom just gets a fucking special on Netflix or Hulu or Prime, and it's Well, cheap to produce, I think, too, is part of why, because they're, like, they can pump them out pretty easily, but— Yeah, you just record three nights and edit it. I'm not, like, the biggest stand-up fan in general. Like, I'll watch it if it's, like, somebody I really like, or if it's, you know— If everybody tells me it's great and stuff, I might watch it, but—
00:25:45
Speaker
I don't know. I, yeah, it's been that way for a long time now. I think it's just the, the, the types of people that they were taking chances on with, you know, like these short form specials and stuff has just shifted from like, you know, one particular sort of like general wise viewpoint and stuff to the other. Yeah. So now it's like right wing grifter time.
00:26:08
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. That's kind of where we're at. Um, It's just annoying. Comedy is an annoying spot. I hope it, I mean, it it'll, it's always going to figure itself out um to a degree, but. If it's not good, people won't watch it and then it'll move on somebody else. tired of like wanting to laugh and watch good comedy and having to start things only to be like, fuck this.
00:26:33
Speaker
It's annoying. Like I used, to you used to be to be like, I know what even people I like. I think it's always been that way, though. i I don't think so. I think it's been that. I mean, the past decade, probably.
00:26:46
Speaker
Always, definitely not. Because it it was so much harder to get a special. You might have had 25 minutes on Comedy Central Presents. Like, it was rare.
00:26:56
Speaker
And I remember as a kid, like, you know, early teens watching Comedy Central all the time. And staying up late after, like, my parents went to bed to watch special. Like, I loved watching stand-up. I watched...
00:27:11
Speaker
ill I remember watching like Jim Gaffigan's Beyond the Pale. And I would like, oh my God, blown away. So funny. That was like the last really good thing that he did. Everything since then has been like...
00:27:26
Speaker
fine that was definitely peak but he's he's had some ups and downs uh peaks and valleys there but he's had definitely a couple good specials since then probably more more misses uh just because he's kind of locked into a certain lane a chist anyway but anyway my only point is i i feel like when i was trying to watch specials in high school which actually i mean I turn 38 next week. So it's crazy to say that that was 20 years ago, right? That I was in high school watching this shit. um
00:28:03
Speaker
But yeah, I don't know. It just, it was more special. um You know, I just watched David Cross's David Cross put his special out on YouTube recently. David Cross is a national treasure.
00:28:15
Speaker
ah He still does comedy me in a way that, really uh just just gets me uh i appreciate the the way that he does comedy um i thought his special was fantastic and i don't know there's there's a few that still have it i feel like um maybe arena comedy is just needs to maybe that's part of the problem to a degree arena comedy is not
00:28:48
Speaker
it doesn't feel like as intended, I guess. I don't know who cares. We can move on. We get some other things to talk about. Yeah. Let's hear some of these. Uh, you said you got some Reddit stuff. Yeah. So one, there was one that came up today. like i'll I'll, this wasn't like the most, like I was reading it ago. I had this one in the back burner. i was like, maybe, maybe, but I got to the comments and then was like, okay, we're, we're, we'll do this one. There's something special about this one. Uh,
00:29:19
Speaker
And I will bury the lead, and I'll get to that in a moment. So
00:29:26
Speaker
this one is called, ah we're in we're in Christian dating advice. This woman is torn. She doesn't know what to do, which is also the name. Of her post. I'm torn. I don't know what to do.
00:29:38
Speaker
ah So she says me and my fiance met at work years ago. um And there there's some weird stuff. Okay. I said I wasn't super. Like I said, it was an adjustment counselor at my middle school. yeah it was It was on the back burner because I...
00:29:54
Speaker
there was there's there's a lot here and i'm like i wasn't even entirely sure how to pull at some of these threads but um and there wasn't a lot of comments at the time trying to like like unweave some of this but anyway um met my fiancee at work years ago he is truly genuine hard working and he loves for real already don't oversell it just say he's a good guy like all right and now i believe you less you just tripled down and oversold uh very sweet dude also you're calling him a dude i think you're more in the friend zone now and you just don't know how to move on with your life he's a sweet dude that's a weird way to talk uh
00:30:43
Speaker
We started out in lust. ah However, it has grown to true love when he when he committed our lives. I think she meant we, but maybe he's just that much in control and leading with the guidance of the Lord. Yeah. When he committed our lives to the Lord, we have been abstinent for two years. Okay, that one actually blows my mind. You guys were fucking...
00:31:12
Speaker
And then you went to like you, you committed to the Lord and you just went celibate in your relationship. That is wild. Yeah. I'm skeptical. Um, I told him in the beginning that I hate smoking.
00:31:28
Speaker
He said he would stop over the years, but it seems to keep going. He calmed down a lot, but it's also not enough for me after all this time of courting slash dating.
00:31:40
Speaker
When I bring it up, he says, I'm trying to stop. I cry to the Lord all the time in the shower, asking what's wrong with me. It even affects his health. He's just chain smoking in the shower.
00:31:55
Speaker
hey ah it even affects his health tremendously that he is hospitalized. I explained to him that he really needs to stop hanging around certain friends and simply stop buying it.
00:32:11
Speaker
And I still don't know if she's talking about weed or cigarettes. Yeah, that's odd. how And it's affecting his health to that point? Like, he's going to the hospital?
00:32:23
Speaker
Right. that's He probably has asthma or emphysema or something. Like, you're not... Smoking... whatever version of it is doesn't affect your health in the short term, unless you already have health complications. He's 80 cancer later. Yeah. She's the she doesn't they engage the golden lame duck years of his ah life. kits That's it.
00:32:49
Speaker
She met this 80 year old dude at work and she's just after she's like, I don't know how much I'm willing to put up with to get his life insurance policy or his estate. it's like everything. If you're, if, Oh, no wonder abstinence was so easy for you. You fucked him once to, to pull him along. And then you're like, uh, I don't think the Lord wants this for us. I don't think the Lord wants your shriveling 80 year old dick inside of me right now, baby. Uh,
00:33:21
Speaker
he cries to the Lord all the time, even in the shower. ah It even affects his health tremendously that he's hospitalized. I explained to him that he really needs to stop hanging around certain friends and simply stop buying it. I had the same addiction too in the past.
00:33:38
Speaker
Oh, so now she thinks she's better than he is because she can curb the addiction he can't. ah I spoke with the pastor and they told me Give him grace because he relearning himself, especially being young. Okay. Not he's not old, especially being young with no sex, weaning off addiction.
00:34:01
Speaker
What a terrible sentence. That is bad. because What does it mean? Christian subreddit language for sure. What does it mean? Give him grace because he relearning himself, especially being young with no sex, weaning off addiction. Okay.
00:34:18
Speaker
Was sex an addiction? what it are just like Are they like, how do you think this guy's going to survive this? He can't fuck, and if he can't smoke, he'll just kill himself. Yeah, if your if your balls are blue, it stands to reason that your lungs are black.
00:34:34
Speaker
Yeah. ah He he has plenty of outlets where he can confide in others that have overcome worse addictions like cocaine in the church and say stuff like I just can't get up and speak on it.
00:34:54
Speaker
Got to get a relationship grounded.
00:34:58
Speaker
um not sure what that means, ah but I'm starting to believe that his addiction is marijuana. It's gotta be. It has to be. I mean, could this really all be because of cigarettes?
00:35:12
Speaker
Yeah, she compared it to Coke. It's weed. She doesn't like that he smokes weed. this this This person who gets this wound up about smoking weed is so annoying. It's like, what year is it, man?
00:35:25
Speaker
you I mean, to to have this level of like resentment over it or have your you know this this guy supposedly crying in the shower over like begging god to help him stop smoking weed i mean it's just stupid everyone in this scenario is a moron also i i just don't know if it's i don't know if it's that hard
00:35:53
Speaker
to stop. Probably just likes it. He probably just likes it or it's like a, so it's a social sort of a, yeah, sort of a comfort addiction thing. What he needs to do is move to edibles and hide it better. And he'll be happy like the rest of us.
00:36:08
Speaker
You know? Uh, I,
00:36:13
Speaker
I've recently started smoking a little more. um i had always done like an edible here and there. I'll go months and months and months without using weed. I probably like the longest I'll go is like six months. Not really been really whatever.
00:36:29
Speaker
i it hits me pretty good um in a way that I can't always manage like how I'm going to deal with it.
00:36:40
Speaker
And that's always with edibles. And then recently I'm like, I've been really cutting back on drinking. um And I was like, well, maybe, you know, I'm not going to do nothing. that's I have a lot I'm trying to suppress over here emotionally.
00:36:59
Speaker
So ah I was like, yeah. whatever. Maybe I'll try. I'll give that a shot again. We've had, we've had pre-rolls for a while that we just, we don't smoke much. So it's like, I'll give it a shot. I'll, I'll go out, light it up, take a you know, two, three, four drags and then put it out and then just go sit on my couch, go to bed in like an hour. And I'm like, what?
00:37:23
Speaker
Like, I don't know. It's weird. Like to, to be that, to be this upset about it. You're like, it always hit me to a point where I could see it. Like there was, ah I'm like, I could see if someone had a problem with me using it because I i kind of just become like a a blob. Right. Like say if if I was going to hang out with Jill and then we were like, we, so we smoked and I'm like, Oh, I guess I'm already ready for bed. I feel like it would kind of ruin the night if we had time to ourselves like that.
00:37:52
Speaker
But lately that hasn't been the case. Lately it's been like, and especially if I don't mix it with drinking at all, I'm like, I could smoke. And I'm like, oh, I could keep doing this and then still just chill and watch something. Like, all that to say, like, I don't know what people's hang up is with it.
00:38:12
Speaker
um Like this, where you're like, just... Like, it seems like he's functioning. Like, there's no, there's nothing here about, like, him abdicating responsibility or not taking care of his business. They met at work. Seems to do just a fine job at work. She said he's hardworking. There's, there's two scenarios in which I would grant her, like, uh, you know, I would, I would support her level of angst against this habit. One,
00:38:45
Speaker
White Rastafarian. Absolutely not under no circumstances. I'm glad I saved my weed smoking for after I eliminated my dreadlocks.
00:38:57
Speaker
That's true. i did If I did both those at the same time, i i would have looked back on my life much different than I do today. Sam Alabanza.
00:39:08
Speaker
yeahll Protect the women and children from gayness. gap propaganda. Just ah immediately develop and a Jamaican accent.
00:39:20
Speaker
Yeah. So that's one scenario. The other scenario is ah he's a flat brim basketball jersey wearing vape store guy that does smoke tricks.
00:39:31
Speaker
Oh, yeah. Vape goons. Hashtag vape goons. yeah yeah yeah if he's a vape goon i so she shouldn't she's giving him too much clemency here if he's like she needs to leave him and they just split custody on the dodge charger he's just like blowing o's and putting his hand through it uh let me wrap this up uh and then get to the real meat of why this one just made my made my evening He occasionally has small anger outbursts with hard convos that can be confronting or revealing.
00:40:06
Speaker
Also, why are you selling yourself like that? Like, he gets mad when I confront him and I make, I reveal too much about who he is to himself. Like, you're not, you're not that, you're not, du i think he's actually probably just mad because he's sick of the way you try to psychopathologize him or whatever.
00:40:26
Speaker
yeah like we don't you annoying yeah maybe you're annoying i think this is stemming from a deeper root in the way you maybe feel about your own father and then he gets mad it's like that's not the weed lady he it's just you being really annoying ah In this season, everyone is rushing our marriage without any assistance to our life after the wedding.
00:40:54
Speaker
Words out that people feel like I'm stringing him along, but in reality, I'm trying to give grace because I love him truly. I'm nervous.
00:41:05
Speaker
When does Grace run out? How long is too long? Am I wrong or overthinking? All that about smoking weed. Does she keep him on the hook? Is she stringing him along because she won't break up with him over weed? Should she just marry him?
00:41:19
Speaker
Who knows? But the top comment. was, uh, if I don't hear this read on a podcast, I'll be disappointed. And so I'm reading it on a podcast. And what's even funnier is I responded to that with like the little, you know, the little eye emojis, like the, Ooh, Oh, okay. I'm paying attention.
00:41:45
Speaker
And, um, And then shortly after that, I jumped into our discord and there was a screenshot of that, of my response to that comment.
00:41:56
Speaker
And it was a member of our discord who was lurking in the Christian dating and advice channel. Heck yeah, dude. The sharks are circling now. Yeah. They smelled the chum in the ah Christian subreddits and now we're all.
00:42:09
Speaker
All stood. All stood. All stood. He's like, man, I should be, I should be more active here. uh, He said he likes he loves hearing us read the stories on the podcast. And that just that meant a lot to me because you know you and I have had conversations on the side privately about whether or not you know getting into some of this stuff is a little stale. Maybe we should be more infrequent with it. But we've had a i ah several people reach out to us lately and talk about how much they...
00:42:39
Speaker
they do love this. So, uh, I, I joined the, join the discord. Uh, nothing, nothing is more fun. Uh, is when I see like a really, just cringe post. That is something that like would make a normal person skin crawl. And I see that Jill has already liked it. I'm like, Yeah, Jill rules. Shout out for former guest, friend of the show, Jill. She'll be joining us again. She was she was another L.U.
00:43:11
Speaker
L.U. person. a lot of mutual friends. I didn't actually really know her L.U. as we talked about last time she was on. But yes, she loves our ah our cringe. She loves she'll love this shout out even.
00:43:24
Speaker
ah And yeah. We're looking forward to having her join us to plumb, plump, plume, plump, plummet, plummet the depths. What am I trying to say?
00:43:37
Speaker
Plumb the depths, plumb the depths, not plummet, not plume them. Plum, plummet, plummet, plummet, plummet. Sure.
00:43:49
Speaker
Yeah. Why not? Whatever. We're going to do it. We're going to plump it with Jill. I just opened my Reddit app and ah the first first post I see is in the am I overreacting subreddit. It says, am I overreacting for wondering if this comment was targeted towards my weight?
00:44:09
Speaker
And it's ah clearly like a blind text. The person's like, where are you from? She says, West Texas with like the dollar sign eyes emoji. And he says, home of the FUPA.
00:44:20
Speaker
What? light Is there even a picture? let's start That's crazy. I don't know. It doesn't seem like it, but um I was going to read you one that I saw that that it kind of caught my attention earlier. i What's funny about these is that you um you start reading them and then you catch key word or two and you're like, oh, wait, this isn't a reasonable person.
00:44:49
Speaker
Yeah, so that's that's always what catches my attention with some of these that are like otherwise not super interesting or maybe you youd think, oh, this is ah this is ah a sad person in distress here. So this one says, ah my wife wants a divorce after I moved my whole life for her. I feel destroyed and I don't know what to do.
00:45:12
Speaker
Okay. I want to think about this one for a second before you get into it.
00:45:20
Speaker
ah Because i feel like a lot of times this is um they lay the guilt on real heavy.
00:45:31
Speaker
where it's like i was such a good husband i did everything for her i moved all the way across the country i gave up a good job maybe maybe he has a kid from a former partner and was willing to like leave the kid in a different state just to just to placate this person's um career choices and then she met someone else at work and doesn't want to be with him anymore but ah you know, I'm going to say maybe he doesn't realize he overplayed the s simp card and it's just like, yeah, you did a little too much. all right. So that's my, that's, um that's where I'm just kind of landing my guesses. um I do like, I like to make guesses before we get to in the weeds here.
00:46:17
Speaker
So let's ah all right, take it away. Let me, let's see where, let's see. how this plays out. My wife just told me she wants a divorce. I moved my whole life for her. I left my parents, my home, my pets, my best friends, everything I was comfortable with. I moved into a new place and started a new job here.
00:46:36
Speaker
I stepped into complete uncertainty for her. Just like Christ sacrificed himself for the church, I did for her. Oh my God. Actually, ah dude, I found, that makes me think of one that I had seen what Oh, yeah du this might be red at night because I have one that connects to that in a way that drove me fucking nuts.
00:46:59
Speaker
ah Like that, the the over...
00:47:05
Speaker
it those like strong armed attempts to try to find a way to put be like if Christ if what would Christ do like Christ experienced this kind of shit like I'm just trying to think of like what Christ would do if he was working at my job Christ wouldn't be working at your job because it's so fucking stupid it means nothing he's getting killed for the greater good he wouldn't work at Lowe's or like Well, maybe he would if carpentry didn't work out for him. I could see Christ taking a yeah second shift at Lowe's. It's not too many steps removed. he He certainly wouldn't work at like Hallmark store, some shit like that. Like trying to figure out what Jesus would do in the shoes of every benign job that's available to humanity. It's fucking stupid.
00:47:59
Speaker
Yeah, well... Get yourself killed by your bosses. That's all that's my suggestion. Whatever you do, make sure your bosses try to kill you, and it's not fair. And you can't complain about it. You just have to be put down like a like a like like Christ Jesus our Lord.
00:48:16
Speaker
So... ah Yeah, just like Christ sacrificed himself for the church, I did for her, like it says in the Bible. It doesn't say that in the Bible. Not really. Not like that.
00:48:28
Speaker
She says that my decisions should come from my owner own inner conviction, not because of her. But again, the Bible says I should sacrifice myself. Plus, I feel like a marriage wouldn't work if no one sacrificed anything for the other one.
00:48:42
Speaker
It's not like I do only do it for her. i did it because I'm convinced that it came from God, parentheses, many wonders and signs in this direction. And to become independent from my parents.
00:48:55
Speaker
So like he's brought up his parents twice now yeah in this thing. He's also like said that, you know, there were divine signs pointing him towards this marriage in which he just like, you know,
00:49:12
Speaker
handed the keys to his entire life to another person and was like, well, you figure it out. I'm along for the ride. And, and by the way, this is very Christlike of me. Yeah. It feels sudden. Like it feels like this, like the way it's being described is like, if this all feels like within this time period of a year,
00:49:31
Speaker
Well, so that was that was my comment on the thing. I said, hey just for context, like, how long did you guys date before you got married? And how long did you know each other before you were, you know, dating?
00:49:46
Speaker
And the answer, in total, 10 months. They knew each other, dated, and got married within 10 months? Yes.
00:49:57
Speaker
Yeah, okay. for For some reason, it's not working. and i I mean, it's hard. i What did he do wrong? Did he not? Did he pray and read his Bible throughout the whole thing? Because that's like usually my number. That's usually my first question.
00:50:14
Speaker
like cause i when I know when I was sad and I know when I was like drive, when I had an hour and 10 minute commute to work and had a lot. going on in my life, but not really a lot. Nothing I really should have been too sad about. But when I would like go to work tired and I would just look at the side of the road and be like, oh, if it looked like an accident, everything would be fine. Like then I wouldn't have to deal with people I love thinking I did this on purpose. Like, you know, those are the sad things, the sad, dark thoughts that enter your mind at the worst moments of your life. And you go,
00:50:46
Speaker
The problem is I'm not praying and reading my Bible enough. You know, so like I know that like i that can work. I just I wonder if that's like what he was doing and maybe things would be better ah if he would just change his tunes.
00:51:01
Speaker
Yeah, maybe. i mean, he is very self-sacrificial, so who knows? but yeah I was trying to be, but apparently that wasn't Christ-like. If I self-sacrifice myself into a ditch off the highway.
00:51:20
Speaker
you have to self-sacrifice yourself in a more dramatic way like for clarity i'm i'm good now i've been i haven't not been in that spot in over 15 years i just want to clarify that's why it's i'm i'm not doing that in my way to work now that's the joke that's what's funny to me is uh but I did think at the time the problem was I wasn't praying and reading my Bible, which almost got me killed. So bad advice. Don't do that. Go get help. Do something. Talk to somebody.
00:51:54
Speaker
So he says, but even if I did all of that only for her, would that be so bad? Yes, that's that's not a relationship. That's not what anybody wants. That's people don't that's like you you wanted a mom like yeah you you gave up one mom for a different mom.
00:52:11
Speaker
She absolutely does not want to drag around a dude who just brags about how he gave up everything for her all the time because self-sacrifice is so sexy.
00:52:23
Speaker
I believed in our marriage. When I said yes, I meant it seriously. i wanted I wanted to spend my life with her. I still see her as my future, and I only want her. i feel completely broken right now. And I mean, you know, when you contrast that with how everyone else, you know, says their vows when they get married, I mean, it is pretty impressive. He was serious.
00:52:47
Speaker
Is this his response to you, or is this still part the original post? no. This is the original post. Okay. Okay. He says, one of the main issues was financial pressure. I didn't feel comfortable with the situation and thought it was risky for us. She interpreted that as me being too influenced by my parents. That became a major conflict between us. Parents again. Do we have a parents counter going?
00:53:09
Speaker
So he yeah so he moved across the country away from mommy and daddy, complaining the whole way and reciting the arguments that his mommy and daddy told him about why it was a bad idea and she should listen to him and just stay put and live in their basement or their pool house or whatever.
00:53:27
Speaker
Do we know how old they are? Nope, they didn't say. That is a major red flag. You got to talk about how old you are. In a post, that matters big on Reddit like that. Everyone puts like F20 whatever, M whatever. like what You do that. Because this is it's a little weird how often he mentioned his parents. like At what age would the weirdness level crank up?
00:53:52
Speaker
like If he was... Minimum. Like, I think if he was 28. I was going to say, dude, I was going to say the same thing. I was going to say I'm being gracious and saying 28, but that's because of the that's because of the world we live in now. Like, it's hard to move out and be independent before you're, like, 25. You know what i mean? But at that point, you've been off their health care for two years. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:54:20
Speaker
Two. isn't Don't you get... Excuse me. 26, I believe. It's 26. Oh, wow. Okay. I'm pretty sure. Thanks, Obama. um From my side, I was trying to act out of responsibility and love because I didn't want us to end up in a financial trouble.
00:54:37
Speaker
I know there were other things. I was very negative. I can't lead that well. Lived my whole life with my parents. I don't want to hear shit about this guy. Yeah. I don't want to hear shit about this guy acting like he's doing anything biblically if he's not willing to lead well.
00:54:56
Speaker
And that's stupid. Like, look, being the leader in the relationship simply because you were born male is really dumb. But I don't trust this guy at all because he's not following.
00:55:11
Speaker
He's not following a single logical conclusion at to to its fullest. I think he broke the spiritual chain of command here. Right. Because the husband is the head of he's the spiritual head of the household. Right. It also says, you know, children, obey your parents.
00:55:28
Speaker
so like oh No, no, and no. Until they cleave to another. No, he cleaved to another, and that's acceptable. well But I think you're something. That's your opinion, brother. I think you're on to something, though, because he's like, I don't like to lead. i don't feel like a leader. So he just you know followed his wife around, did whatever she asked, and look what happened.
00:55:50
Speaker
This is what happens when you thwart your spiritual authority. You can't. The Bible gave it to you. Christ gave it to you as he gave head to the church. I think that's what it says somewhere Scripture. It's just like Pastor Shuttlesworth said. you know he he He failed to stand in his spiritual authority when ah when temptation came, and yeah he texted 20 women for 15 years. Right.
00:56:18
Speaker
And look, be fair, that was trial and tribulation.
00:56:24
Speaker
that was a trial and tribulation That was a one time thing 20 times. And it's so it's not the same. You know, he he made one mistake 20 times. It's not, you know, stuff happens.
00:56:38
Speaker
Yeah. But he was trying to lead spiritually. So if he's doing the right thing and he is truly because God knows the heart. Right. So if God knows his heart, God will keep his wife trapped in their loveless marriage for the sake of the gospel.
00:56:55
Speaker
It's only right. Yeah. So I can't lead that well. Lived my whole life with my parents. Emotionally not too smart. But she knew all of that.
00:57:07
Speaker
but ah Why did she marry me? And then two months later, after I did everything for her, drops me like a hot potato spelled wrong. i don't I don't know what to do right now. I feel like I lost everything. I'm also struggling with the question if there is still any hope.
00:57:27
Speaker
If someone has been in a similar situation where they thought they were they married the love of their life, but things broke down, did you ever really find the one of the one for your life after the one for life afterwards?
00:57:40
Speaker
So he's already thinking about the next girl that he's going to plague. I do the recognition that you're not that smart. Like, I feel like the only person to successfully do that was Forrest Gump, right? Like, I'm not that smart, but he had so much other shit going for him.
00:58:00
Speaker
Bro started like a shrimp company. Like he ran across the country. This kid's like too stupid for Cupid. You know, he like, there's nothing happening. Like there's nothing, no, no sparks, no romance.
00:58:14
Speaker
It's a, you need something more to offer than just being like a sad boy who misses his mom and dad. How far away did they move? Do we know that? And where to and from?
00:58:26
Speaker
That's probably not here either. Right? No, it didn't. It didn't say, I mean, he made it sound like they moved across the country. So it seems like it's probably a decent move, but like,
00:58:38
Speaker
People move, man. What are you going to And if yeah moving was important to your wife, maybe you should have dated for more than like three months before getting engaged.
00:58:48
Speaker
Right. mean they met They knew each other for 10 months. At that point, they got married. And now it's been two months and they're already like talking about divorce. Like, yeah, I just I I'm not sure what happened with the signs and wonders, but it seems like there may have been a misinterpretation.
00:59:07
Speaker
He says, I also wonder if a relationship can survive, can even survive if one person partner is not willing to stay through difficult phases like this. Usually not. I mean, usually sort of um a relationship surviving requires both people to be interested in that. Usually the honeymoon period is longer than one month.
00:59:27
Speaker
Well, you know, they spent their one month of honeymoon was them moving across country. one of the most miserable experiences ah moving across the country and closing costs takes like 80% off the honeymoon period. I hope they've already adopted a golden retriever. I can fight for custody. i hope they already adopted a golden retriever and put it back up for adoption. Yeah.
00:59:54
Speaker
Inquiring here about whether or not I can get my dog declawed. It's
01:00:05
Speaker
it' so stupid. I just feel destroyed and I don't know how to move forward right now. Was it just a lesson? Did God prepare me for the real love of my life? I don't want to believe that. I love her so much. She's my everything. And is divorce even biblical?
01:00:22
Speaker
Was it just a lesson? Is God trying to teach me a lesson through all of my bad choices? No, dude, that's just bad choices. Like no one's I love when people chalk up all of their irresponsibility to God trying to teach them a lesson. I mean, it's just the universe telling you to grow the fuck up.
01:00:42
Speaker
Yeah, it is funny, like how people react to these posts to like this guy says ah two months is such a short time that it seems to me she is not mature and not close to God. Marriage is not something anyone should take lightly and divorce is the last option. This guy's on Reddit.
01:01:00
Speaker
He's floating it. It is very clearly one-sided. Oh my God. And he's the one who's like, I don't know. I'm not strong. I don't lead. My parents told me not to do it. I did it.
01:01:12
Speaker
We've been together for 10 months. We moved across the country. And now I want to go home and see my mommy.
01:01:21
Speaker
My mom was right. You are a hussy. You're a whore. You know, fun term that my grandma used to use, instead of saying whore, she would say that someone was a flickertail.
01:01:35
Speaker
Hey, flickertail. That's kind of fun, huh? What does it mean? Whore. but Why? I guess because it's like, I don't know, like a deer, you know, peeing on the tree to let the buck know she's ruddy.
01:01:50
Speaker
she's ruddy what What? I don't get what that means at all. how does that have anything to do flicking tail? It has a barnyard connotation. I don't know. Maybe maybe hogs swish their tail when they want to bang. Flick your tail. That makes sense.
01:02:06
Speaker
You flick your tail when you, oh, let me flick it this way and flick it that way. Dude, I like ah like an overly horny, pushy guy as being like ah you know, a tortoise. Like, have you ever seen ah a horny tortoise and he just like walks behind the female and just bumps her shell?
01:02:25
Speaker
isy only one You're the only one who knows what a horny torn is tortoise looks like. There's a great like David Attenborough clip where he's narrating like this tortoise mating ritual. And it's basically just the male following the female around and going whack, whack, whack and head butting the back of her shell. Yeah.
01:02:44
Speaker
But also 85% of your Instagram stories are just watching bugs try to fuck other bugs. Like if anyone knows how to make an analogy or an example out of a different species trying to mate with another species, it's you. It's it's mostly what you're looking for at night.
01:03:08
Speaker
Yeah. I'm somewhat of a scientist myself. you you're crack You're... I'm somewhat of a zoophile myself. I would give you an honorary doctorate. You posted a story in the last 24 hours of a giant bug...
01:03:25
Speaker
With like these massive pincher, like like mandible type things. Yeah. Dobson fly. Yeah. the du Dude, that thing was terrifying. It looks like it had sticky legs too. And you know how I feel about sticky legs.
01:03:40
Speaker
Yeah. he Oh, he definitely does. The Dr. James Dobson fly. if you were to put it that way. If you lean real close, you can hear him go, stop gooning.
01:03:50
Speaker
Stop gooning. do i was um Actually, when you look at all of his um when when you look at all the books that we've read from him that have been updated with new terminology, I don't think Gooning has ever appeared.
01:04:07
Speaker
No, i he must have kicked the bucket before before that one came out. It's newfangled slang language, I guess. Bummer. Didn't get to, you know, just had a regular run-of-the-mill funeral, not one of those cool new dang fangled Goonerles.
01:04:26
Speaker
coonner roll
01:04:30
Speaker
That's where you're buried face up with the mortician lets the rigor mortis set in from the waist down. you're ah You're buried six inches under. That
01:04:43
Speaker
yeah way you can the just the tip can still get stomped on whenever people walk by. it's A little pork snorkel sticking out. There's like sign. That's a headstone. Hey.
01:04:54
Speaker
There's a giant sign that says, please stay off the grass unless you're wearing eight inch heels.
01:05:02
Speaker
ah some Dude, there's a Japanese businessman that would pay for that. No flat-footed bitches here. um Oh, man. there was a Dude, there was ah on the the Wichita Facebook marketplace the other day. i so i took a screenshot of it. There was like a very just rough-looking...
01:05:32
Speaker
couple selling a a secondhand sex swing no way and it wasn't like some uh oh there's a hook in your ceiling and you hang it up from there like a little like fly by night trapeze deal like this was you okay you remember like back in the day people would buy their their kids like that uh the horse that was mounted on springs and Yeah, yeah. And you get your little thighs stuck in the spring, pinch you like, like you know, you wouldn't believe.
01:06:02
Speaker
yeah this was like that. It was like an entire like like toddler playground of worth of metal tubing and stuff like that. With like, ah ah like you're you're seated in a recumbent bicycle position and swinging freely.
01:06:19
Speaker
And they were asking, I think they were asking 400 bucks for it. That's a lot. ah I was, I'm in a discord with some old friends ah from like my high school days.
01:06:32
Speaker
And I have a friend who constantly posts pictures of shit he finds on Facebook marketplace that are ridiculous. And one of them was a deodorant.
01:06:45
Speaker
No indication whether it's used or unused. Deodorant, $5 for two or $3 for The smaller ones are dollar. the smaller ones are a dollar
01:06:57
Speaker
Uh, it's, it's a lot of very bizarre things that people post on, uh, Facebook marketplace, which, Oh, absolutely. ah Doritos, cool ranch bag, sealed, collectible misprint, $125. It's like, I don't, I don't believe you.
01:07:16
Speaker
I don't believe you. Uh, it's probably not $125. I don't know where you got that information, but you should cite your sources.
01:07:26
Speaker
And, uh, There was one that really had me rolling. Oh, here it is. ah Ray's Honey Mustard.
01:07:38
Speaker
Free. Never opened. Bought the wrong kind. They accidentally bought no sugar added. So they just decided to put it on Facebook Marketplace for free. like it Facebook Marketplace is nuts. It is. There's some wild stuff on there.
01:07:58
Speaker
Um, okay. So should we jump it? we So this is a, this is a kind of an open-ended topic. I don't have like a very put together, presentation for you, but there's, there's a guy that I found. I don't even remember how I stumbled across him, but he came across my YouTube feed or something like that probably last year.
01:08:21
Speaker
And I've wanted to talk about him for a while, but I just wasn't really sure how to Um, he's a, a Christian. ah He's a doc. His name is Dr. David E. Clark.
01:08:35
Speaker
Clark with an E on the end. Uh, is he a real doctor? Okay. Well, don't jump ahead. Okay. he uh, he is a ah I guess it depends on where you're reading his introductions, but he introduces himself as like a clinical psychologist and, uh, you know, uh, a practitioner, like a therapeutic practitioner and stuff. Basically like he sort of, uh, sells himself as like a therapist.
01:09:09
Speaker
Okay. I found him online. Uh, i felt his Okay, here's how unreliable I can tell this website is without actually looking at anything.
01:09:23
Speaker
It is books.google.com. What the fuck? Why am I on a shrimp scampi recipe? ah You go, overview. David E. Clark, PhD, is a Christian psychologist. Dude, when you click on this shit,
01:09:41
Speaker
this has not been... it just hasn't been developed for the phone. You know, when you like, it looks like you clicked desktop view. Yeah. I don't even know what that website is.
01:09:54
Speaker
You can't, it looks like desk. It's like when you go on your phone and you're like, let me see the desktop view. that an Amazon page? It's Google. Moody, moody publishers. Uh, enough is enough. He's got some books. All right. I'll let you take it. Yeah. So part of the reason why I didn't bring him up right away when I wanted to talk about him before is because like, o he's experimented with being bald.
01:10:18
Speaker
Not a good look. Oof. He he does a lot of ah a lot of his videos and stuff are about toxic relationships and ah and how to handle like being, you know, dealing with an abusive partner and stuff. And.
01:10:37
Speaker
At first glance, I feel like there's parts of his of his videos and advice and stuff that sound like tough love, but like decent advice, you know, like he he's given a pretty clear communication that like you, you know, people need to get out of these like abusive situations and stuff like that. But then the more you watch him, the more you start to notice like some very odd things about the way this guy who purports to be like a, a you know, a psychologist and a therapist and stuff like that talks about people.
01:11:10
Speaker
And I think, well, hate this man. I hate him so much. and I can tell I do. Before, I think, I guess before you want to get, like, before you get too in the weeds on the way he talks about other people, I'm i'm looking at,
01:11:28
Speaker
About the author, David E. Clark. Apparently he wrote some of these books with other people because it's William G. Clark. I think that's his dad. Okay. so But looking at the David E. Clark, I immediately just... There are some red flags that resonate with some of your concerns.
01:11:50
Speaker
Christian psychologist, speaker, and the author of 15 books, including... And this is where I get a little... Let me look into these.
01:12:03
Speaker
ah I don't want a divorce. My spouse wants out and I don't love you anymore.
01:12:12
Speaker
Is his wife trapped? Is she okay? Well, that's a great question. um One of the many like odd and kind of disturbing things about this guy, like I said, oh way that he talks about people.
01:12:27
Speaker
but Let me finish this because something else stuck out that just feels peculiar way to ah
01:12:37
Speaker
strange, it's just unnecessary adjectives. So he's a graduate of Dallas Theological Seminary. God damn, that's already a problem. And Western Conservative Baptist Seminary. Sounds like another big problem.
01:12:53
Speaker
He has been in private practice for more than 30 years, focusing on marriages in crisis. He and his blonde wife, Sandy, live in Tampa, Florida.
01:13:06
Speaker
He does that over and over again. When he mentions his wife, ah like ah a majority of the time, he says, my blonde wife. That's wild it's very strange. Yeah, I don't I don't understand what that means. I mean, he's definitely a boomer. So like I'm I assume that means he's taking like a little like shot at his wife as being like dumb or something like that.
01:13:29
Speaker
I think it's because he thinks blondes are sexy. My blonde wife. In case you're wondering, they have four children and four grandchildren.
01:13:40
Speaker
Parentheses. So far, they have asked for more grandkids. Ha ha ha. They asked their children to fuck. Ha ha ha. They got their way because his website says he has five grandchildren.
01:13:53
Speaker
I bet one of them is... like his child slash grandchild though so this is how he writes like this is the rest of the bio on his website yeah it says if you've got marital problems that's what i do whatever you're in the voice of like you've got marital problems and he thinks it's so funny whatever you're facing in your relationship i've got a specific plan to deal with it I've got a specific plan to deal with it from the clinical psychologist. Yeah. Narcissistic abuse, adultery, sexual sin, verbal abuse, constant fighting, breakdowns in communication, blended family issues, trouble with in-laws, one spouse wanting a divorce. I'll work with you to develop a strategy to create change.
01:14:42
Speaker
First, I'm a follower of Jesus Christ. Second, I base my clinical work on the Bible and God's truths in psychology. Oh my God. What a fucking failure from the get-go.
01:14:54
Speaker
I'm a directive, how-to, homework-giving therapist. I won't just sit there and listen. I will give you a detailed plan of action. 99% of what I do now is phone advice sessions with persons across America and the world.
01:15:10
Speaker
So this guy does not have a physical, like, he doesn't have like a physical practice where he sees patients. He doesn't do any inpatient sort of therapy or anything. And if you look at like the homepage of his website and scroll down, there's kind of a separate about you, me session or section.
01:15:30
Speaker
he says, uh, If traditional Christian counseling has failed you, contact me. My approach is unorthodox, but solidly biblical and effective. I call sin, i call sin sin, and it is addressed directly. Adultery, emotional neglect, abuse, and other sins are 100% the fault of the sinner and are not ignored or sidestepped.
01:15:52
Speaker
This is what's weird. I do not work directly with couples. My focus is on helping individuals who are in marital crisis through my phone advice service. i don't want I don't work with couples because I can't have two people corroborating evidence against me.
01:16:10
Speaker
ah yeah he follows He's Jehovah's Witness. He's following the two witness rule. I only work one-on-one with people, so that way it's a he said, she said.
01:16:25
Speaker
I ask all my female patients to send me intimate pictures of themselves so I can prove that their husband is lying when he says they're inadequate. Yeah. Like something like that. So i mean it's so funny. like I don't work. I, I give homework. I don't work with couples. oh my God. There's something else that was, I was, I was, uh, that stuck out to me.
01:16:46
Speaker
Um, that, uh, call sin, sin. Yep, he does do that, which is refreshing because a lot of people don't. Oh, most of it's phone. ah That's notable.
01:16:59
Speaker
It's just like, because most of it's phone, it's like, I'll give you a... de This guy is a Tim Robinson character. I'll give you a detailed action. Oh, my God, du You're going to want to leave. You'll never leave. Like, he'll just... It's just read it in Tim Robinson voice, and it's that bad. That's how...
01:17:16
Speaker
that's how bad this guy is um if he's doing most of it by phone and he's giving action plans it's like 30 what charging 30 bucks an action plan does he have a toll-free number you can call he does okay so this is this is the other thing here i mean then this is we haven't even gotten to his videos yet okay but he has phone advice sessions they're 45 minutes for 220 dollars Oh my God. Should we split it and be a gay couple?
01:17:42
Speaker
Oh, he doesn't do couples. He would tell us he'd call sin a sin if he yeah he did that. He'd call a sin a sin. So we we haven't even touched on how crazy this guy's videos are yet, but just listen to this convoluted process for how to get in touch with him and stuff.
01:17:59
Speaker
um You can get Dr. Clark's input on your marriage, family, or personal life. When you are in difficult situations, it can help to ask questions get some practical advice. Step one, email or text Dr. Clark at blah, blah, blah to schedule your appointment. Step two, once you have scheduled, you will call this number two minutes prior to your appointment time and give Dr. Clark your credit card information. He will run it for $220. Then you'll talk for 45 minutes. Or you can pay online. You will picture of your genitals, and he will tell you exactly how he feels about them.
01:18:30
Speaker
ah Or you can pay online by emailing Dr. Clark and he will send you a link to make payment. Please note, you can only pay online after you have contacted Dr. Clark via email or text and has and he has scheduled your appointment.
01:18:43
Speaker
this is ah This is interesting because like everything that he deals with is like very heavy issues. It's spousal abuse and like leaving your partner, divorce, all of that kind of stuff. How to handle your kids in that situation.
01:18:58
Speaker
this is the deep This is what his sessions work out to be. The first session is always 45 minutes, so Dr. Clark can get the information he needs to give you a plan of action. If you want to do a follow-up session, it will be 30 minutes long and cost is $147. So there's like he's...
01:19:16
Speaker
Whatever your problem is, he's going to solve it in 45 minutes, and if you insist on talking to him again, he's only going to talk to you for 30 minutes as a follow-up.
01:19:26
Speaker
Does he take insurance? No. Of course not. There's an important notice at the bottom that says, this phone communication is not therapy. This will not be a therapeutic relationship.
01:19:38
Speaker
Dr. Clark's phone sessions do not, cannot, cannot, Take the place or of an in-person therapist. This communication to you via phone is designed to provide limited advice and guidance to help you in a particular problem. Wisdom demands that you find a competent, trained, licensed Christian therapist whom you can see personally.
01:19:55
Speaker
To find a therapist, check out our anti-NARC counselors directory on this site. Anti-NARC. So he has a lot of little like catchphrases and stuff like that or terms.
01:20:08
Speaker
Dude, that's a lot of caveats though. Like you need a licensed therapist. This is not therapy. I will give you a solution. If it doesn't work and you want to talk again, it's going cost you more money. Like this is a scam.
01:20:21
Speaker
This is like, because it like, Look, ah the language he's using i is familiar, right?
01:20:32
Speaker
There's ah there's ah like solutions. There's a couple different types of therapy you can do, obviously. um i I think i this might just be, you know,
01:20:45
Speaker
a how I feel personally and what I think would most be beneficial for my life, which is why I gravitate towards like a solutions based therapy. That's the language that he's using. Um,
01:20:59
Speaker
Which is like most people who are in therapy, like, yeah, there are some people in therapy that just need to work out, you know, trauma in order to like find a level of peace. And, you know, when trauma, when you experience trauma, that's not your fault.
01:21:19
Speaker
Uh, so there's not always a solution.
Therapy Pitfalls and Manipulative Advice
01:21:22
Speaker
was not like, okay, you're having this problem, so you need to work through it. Um, it's your experience in this trauma and you need to process it. Uh, so, you know, a solutions based therapy might not be for you, but I liked solutions based therapy, you know, working in a school.
01:21:38
Speaker
Um, I think most people who get stuck are looking for that. They're just looking for someone to be like, um, okay, here's where you're stuck. Here's what you need to do. We're going to meet in a couple of weeks and you're going to tell me how you did that or why you didn't.
01:21:54
Speaker
And if like, I like that as a motivator, like when you've been given an assignment by someone to do something, to push you outside of your comfort zone, to report back in two weeks and be like, uh, I didn't do it. Why not? I was scared. Like it's the fear of looking like an idiot to someone you've opened up to that makes you like,
01:22:14
Speaker
do something that will better yourself to push you um but so anyway this guy's like kind of co-opting solutions based therapy language which in a way where you can't you cannot hear someone's problem give them an objective and a clear-cut like action plan and say and then not have a follow-up
01:22:41
Speaker
You can't just not have a follow-up. You have to debrief that. To say that I'm going to create this action plan for you to do, and if you do it, then everything will work out great and we never need to talk again. This guy needs to go to jail immediately. This is fraud, dude. he This is just fraud from like the ground up.
01:23:00
Speaker
Yeah, I feel like if I was a solutions-based therapist, I'd feel like a lot of what I would tell people to do is walk it off. Yeah. You're like, did you... Did you try gooning?
01:23:14
Speaker
It all comes back to gooning. i've I've heard that if you jerk off for longer than 30 minutes, that that will solve whatever problem you're dealing with.
01:23:26
Speaker
I do have some bad news, though. I am on the anti-NARC counselors directory, and there are none in Kansas and none in Massachusetts. So Massachusetts probably has actual laws against idiots like this trying to practice online.
01:23:44
Speaker
There's one in Connecticut, so you can go down there. I have to go to Arkansas. Apparently I could. That's sick. I could just cross the border, hit up a coffee shop and have my life ruined online. Usually you can just do that by like downloading DraftKings.
01:24:00
Speaker
So the reason that this guy got my attention and why I really dislike him is because I think that he' is he's taking kind of a unique...
01:24:11
Speaker
role in ah in like the therapeutic grifting space in that his whole thing is telling Christian boomers that whatever their worst impulse is, it is not only the best course of action, but they are biblically correct in doing so.
01:24:30
Speaker
That is what so much of this feels like. I mean, the advice that he gives is just the most destructive, ridiculous things. like i And he he does a lot of a lot of what he talks about are you know what to do if you are dating or are married to a narcissist.
01:24:51
Speaker
And you might ask, no he he would know. You might ask like, well, how do I know if I'm married to a narcissist or something? Well, you pay $220 and he will tell you in 45 minutes.
01:25:06
Speaker
And that's not me being glib. He says that. He goes, schedule a phone service for me and I won't pull punches. I will tell you in that 45 minute call if you're married to a narcissist. I'll confirm it for you.
01:25:20
Speaker
Which is is crazy. I mean, it's like reading these Reddit posts. Like, how much do you know about any of these situations reading one whiny spouse's or boyfriend's account of what's happened between them? You know, like, it's insane to think that you can diagnose someone as a narcissist. And his idea of a narcissist is a literal demon.
01:25:43
Speaker
Like yeah these aren't people. It's him. No, it's, but it's ah the irony is it's him. He's like, he, he like, he pokes out, he like opens his like sliding glass door to his office to scream at his, son his screaming, his assistant.
01:25:59
Speaker
He's like, Tiffany, Tiffany, I want you to get me a list of all narcissistic personality traits. And she just sits there and she just thinks about her boss and writes down everything she can think of.
01:26:12
Speaker
And he goes, this is perfect. You nailed it.
01:26:18
Speaker
So he actually has like fairly big online following. um His, his TikTok channel, for instance, he's got 400,000 followers on Wow. And,
01:26:30
Speaker
I mean, that being said, i think TikTok follower numbers are ridiculous and fake. but Right. He's all he's he's probably he's probably like done like three I Stayed With Israel videos, and now he has 400,000 followers.
01:26:44
Speaker
ah ah Let me see what he's got on his YouTube, because that's where I found him. ah YouTube, he has 91,000 subscribers. So it's new i mean he's no slouch. He's got quite a bit. and Yeah, that's crazy.
01:26:57
Speaker
Like I said, a lot of what he does is just tell boomers that whatever their worst impulse is, is right. So, for instance, ah let's see.
01:27:13
Speaker
Here's here's a video about ah narcissists, okay? It says, narcissists do not change. I'll tell these ladies, once you leave and you're on the way to divorce, you hold the line. The message to the narc should be, I'm done. And your kids, done. No chance. I don't care what you do. Change, not change. I'm through with you. Now, the right man, if it's if it's a person who's actually going to change, that will not stop him.
01:27:38
Speaker
In the face of there's nothing you can do, he'll still get the job done for the next eight, nine, ten months. Most narcs won't last a week, and they certainly won't last over a month. They will cave because there's no their magic isn't working, and if i if I can't get you back, I'm not going to do this, and they will turn on you like a snake.
01:27:57
Speaker
Okay, that's how you test them. ah The fact is you might be done. You're not actually kidding. You're not you're not kidding around here. I may be done with you, and you're you're given that. Because what God does is he turns the heart off.
01:28:09
Speaker
I've had five ladies this week. The heart off? And it's a weird feeling. All of a sudden, it's like they have no feeling for their narc. and They're done. The heart is gone. No feeling, no empathy. And I've told each Problem number one, you test them.
01:28:25
Speaker
You go, nope, I'm leaving. and You know what? I'm leaving. He's actually, there's some truth to this, which I hate to say, because like narcissists will, what they do is they try to, they try to manipulate a situation to get the upper hand and what they want. And then when it doesn't, they do turn on you and they try to ruin you.
01:28:46
Speaker
um But it's also like, there's probably a better, there's probably a more in between road where you can, well, a narcissist might also leave you high and dry.
01:28:59
Speaker
and then expect you to dance for a year whatever to get them back or something. I mean, it's... they it's There's... I think his definition of what a narcissist is and how they act is, like, way dark wild.
01:29:15
Speaker
Yeah. But like the danger of... He he recommends, if you if you think that you're with a narcissist, which basically to him means, if you are kind of done with your marriage and you feel like it's time to go...
01:29:28
Speaker
Leave and don't talk to anyone about it. Cut contact with your ex-husband. Cut contact. Tell your kids. He says to write your kids a letter explaining about how their dad abused you and then tell them in the letter, I'm not going to discuss this with you ever again. I'm not going to answer questions about it.
01:29:48
Speaker
I am done with this relationship and that's it. That's insanity. I mean, that is insanity. That's like throwing your kid to the wolves. That's crazy. But like in general, like my thoughts on narcissists is that like it's I'm going to hold this together so I can save face and look like a wonderful person. And then when it falls apart, I'm going to blame you. going to ruin you and I'm going to make sure you look like the bad guy.
01:30:17
Speaker
So like fair, the advice that he's giving actually. And I have a friend who's getting who has who got divorced from a narcissist. And he does all the typical playbook narcissist bullshit. And he is a pastor, by the way.
01:30:33
Speaker
um And he's a nightmare. He's a fucking evil ah fucking piece of shit. I remember you talking about this guy. Yeah. um So. he's He's just, I mean, evil isn't even the right word. Evil just feels calculated. i just go, you're and such a narcissist. Like your brain is broken. You can't, you don't even entertain. a You're not choosing evil. You can't entertain a world in which how you feel isn't the most salient thing in other people's reality.
01:31:03
Speaker
And so like, it's just, it's because of how, dead set they are on protecting their uh the facade yeah yeah that's yeah the facade they're they're what they've created they're like who they think people think they are like they will destroy you
01:31:36
Speaker
in order to save face. So the, this advice that he's giving, Oh, just push him and test him and then hold the line is actually really dangerous. If you have important things to lose, I'm not saying that's not like you, you could in some situations, maybe if there aren't kids involved or a mortgage that you've signed together, or one of you makes more money than the other, like there are ways that you could watch them short circuit and implode, but if they're,
01:32:05
Speaker
It's also very dangerous to do that to a narcissist because they can ruin your life and they maintain a composure with the right people who can help them ruin your life. like It's terrible advice.
01:32:22
Speaker
Yeah. he um So in like one of his more famous books is ah I Don't Want to Get a Divorce. or It's something along those lines. It's like, I don't want a divorce.
01:32:35
Speaker
And it's a marriage advice book. At some point, like somewhere around five, six years ago, from what I've seen, he made a major flip where he went from being a, he was a promoted, like focus on the family author. Like they had him on their shows and talked about how great his books were and stuff. And he like, didn't recommend divorce at all.
01:32:56
Speaker
But like his strategies were very similar to right now. Like in this book, he's he basically says, like, ah you know, if you're experiencing marital problems with your spouse, like shun them.
01:33:15
Speaker
You should just like shun them. Don't respond to them. Don't talk to them. Just shun them until they see the error of their ways and they like correct their behavior.
01:33:27
Speaker
ah He says to like build a support network of people that will support you in like staying angry at your spouse and like calling, you know, never say a nice thing. Yeah. Like he wants a, he wants people to find like a group of people to help, help them in like, like shunning and saying like,
01:33:50
Speaker
awful things about the person. or It's just like, it's, it's this bizarre advice. And I, I should have had a couple of more clips pulled up here, but here while we're, let's, let's shift here a little bit and talk about, uh, one of the other subjects that he covers.
01:34:08
Speaker
So on top of like all this stuff about narcissists and like how to leave a narcissist and how this and that and the other, again, narcissists exist. And like there, you know, there's,
01:34:21
Speaker
I there's absolutely like there's so many situations where an abusive partner is present and like a person needs to
Religious Upbringing and Modern Christianity
01:34:28
Speaker
get out of there. Right. But I think my question, ah the thing that that troubles me about his advice is that he doesn't talk about how fast you have to run. Yeah. yeah And he says generalities is about like what a narcissistic behavior would look like. And every one of us has sat with a friend And listen to them like describe their partner in a way that you're like, well, that's not true. You know, like just paint them as like the worst person in the world and stuff like.
01:34:58
Speaker
ah You know, I did one of the one of my big pet peeves is like ah an adult man is like. My bitch wife. That kind of shit. Listening to dudes do that.
01:35:11
Speaker
I hate that. Like when they when you when you got that one guy around that like there's a couple of guys that that used to go on work trips with us and stuff. We would end up in the same places and it was just like all they wanted to talk about was like how annoying their wife was and she wants them to call them because she doesn't trust, ah you know, just this and that, like all this, they never shut up about it. And it's like, which is like a lame problem thing. Oh, she doesn't trust you. I wonder why. Probably because you suck. Probably because you've given her a reason to not trust you. Right. Because your, your thesis on women are all conniving, distrusting people. Like you're just obviously not that great. Like, yeah,
01:35:53
Speaker
It's also funny when you know the wife, like when the guy's like, yeah you you know, and then my wife's like, man, you and you're like, and then back your mind, you're like, I, I know your wife and she's actually a better person than you. And I like her more than you. And you're completely wrong. You're entirely wrong.
01:36:10
Speaker
Like your wife is right. And when I hear you talk about her, about the way you think she thinks about you, I'm like, she's right. She's right. And you're bad. Yeah, absolutely.
01:36:23
Speaker
So the other thing that he talks a lot about is about, ah you know, like what to do if you're a parent who has a child who turns from Christ, a prodigal, as he calls it.
01:36:36
Speaker
and Potential prodigal. You're only prodigal if you make it back. Otherwise, you just have the potential. I think what's funny about his – so this is in much the same way as like he does with the relationship advice.
01:36:49
Speaker
All of this is in telling like the specific boomer who's listening that everything that they want to do is correct and biblically justified, and they should do all of it.
01:37:00
Speaker
So like this is ah when your adult child turns away from God. Your adult child has chosen to turn away from God, away from you, to live a sinful, selfish, and self-destructive lifestyle. You are crushed, devastated, deeply hurt, traumatized, heartbroken. You never expected it to have an adult radical. And we pour our lives into our kids. And so when they pull this awful stunt of turning away from everything they've been taught and been and have you built into their lives, oh, it's pretty awful. You will do anything to save your child and bring them back to God and
01:37:34
Speaker
It's got nothing to do with you. You've done everything right. You've raised them in the way of the Lord, and they are selfish and awful and want to destroy everything, including you. They're doing this to you.
01:37:48
Speaker
like He's describing my life from the child's perspective. I was... I was sent to a private Christian school and then I was homeschooled for the purpose of creating a whole family full of devout, even dr workmen who are not ashamed, approved who had carried the torch and ah did not work out. My parents, you know, when we started this, I was like, oh, they're one for four.
01:38:17
Speaker
Bummer. They are over four. They are over four. Now I find no value in, uh, in this current, in the current zeitgeist of loosely identifying with Christianity. Like I just, I, I think about it.
01:38:33
Speaker
I think about a lot and it's a little hard for me to be like, nah, I guess I just don't. But like, then I look around me, I look at what um, I look at what it means and what it doesn't mean and how it actually means fucking nothing based on how many people thinks it means things that don't align in any form or fashion. And I go, no, what am I doing? What am I doing? I'm giving myself, I hate talking to people.
01:39:01
Speaker
I don't know very well. I hate really explaining myself at all. And I go, you can't even, you can't talk about this. Without having to explain yourself. Someone goes, are you a Christian? And you're like, fuck. I can either say yes and then be locked into a conversation for 45 minutes about why I'm not what they think it means.
01:39:23
Speaker
Or I can say no and move on with my life. ah No is the better option in all in every scenario I found myself in for the past. That's a lot of words to say. i want to live a selfish lifestyle and I'm doing this to hurt my parents who did the right thing and raised me. Here's hate you.
01:39:42
Speaker
Here's why I hate you for that. is uh i feel like i'm the only one objective i'm the one going out of my way to make my life harder because of what i think is the right thing to do while they just but other people in our family just suck off trump and buy his fucking bitcoin Classic sign of a narc. A narc will always justify their behavior. They think they're always right that everybody else is wrong. That's everybody. That's what I think. That's literally being human. They think they're right. No, I just walked into this thinking I like things that are wrong.
01:40:23
Speaker
well oh why I feel like you're not sufficiently convicted yet, so let's hear little more. like you're still trying to get me saved, Casey. I feel like you haven't given up on it. love i'm going to uh usurp you and become the son that your parents wish they had i hope so because then we can finally be brothers and you can come to my family parties you can come to my family dinners and listen to a lot of different conversations that happen within a 30 minute time period
01:40:58
Speaker
I'll be like, hey, Dad, did you hear Jelly Roll on Flagrant 2? they ah My family dinners within 30 minutes cover... through they cover probably like if i was gonna just i'm let me rapid fire i'm gonna try to come up with like eight eight to ten things that we might talk about at a family dinner in 30 minutes uh martial arts dungeons and dragons elon musk republicans leftists canada socialism health care as a human right uh oh that's already eight um
01:41:32
Speaker
the housing crisis corrupt politicians uh dude i mean that's i hit 10 and that that i'm not joking that those i'm i'm reflecting back on my last family dinner and the within 30 minutes we've touched on all 10 of those and it was awful yeah it sounds terrible awful did you talk about dolphin kidnappings ah We talked about, no, and not the kidnappings, but I was really excited to bring up...
01:42:04
Speaker
uh kamikaze dolphins ah yes i ran i ran especially which apparently ah which apparently i don't know i have to i um i should look into this more before i state this so like take this with a grain of salt but what i heard was that we because we talked about the kamikaze dolphin thing and i played a clip about them talking about it on fox news very funny um But what I
Military Jargon and Absurd Realities
01:42:30
Speaker
heard was that like the, the like robots, the drones, the ships, the remote control submarines, whatever it is that they have, uh, that they use to detonate ocean mines. They, they, they have like their code name is a dolphin. They call them dolphins.
01:42:49
Speaker
Um, and so like when they're like, they have kamikaze dolphins, it's like, yeah, it's like kamikaze submarine. They have, things that they remote control underwater. I don't know if that's true. If it's true, it makes me hate our country more, but also kind of actually love it even a little bit more.
01:43:09
Speaker
It's so stupid because we live in fucking pretend ass land, dude. to what it we I mean, dude, what do we even what what are we? we've We've almost had an agreement with Iran 47 times since fucking two weeks ago. We don't need to go down that road.
01:43:24
Speaker
I'm sorry I brought us there. let's Let's re-center here. Let's let's let's center her and wrap. all right. I'm jumping ahead a little bit. all right
01:43:34
Speaker
All right. I see this over and over again. At least one of the parents is an enabler feeding the problem. Scripture teaches us to do nothing to encourage and support a chronic, unrepentant sinner. And your child is choosing a pattern of sin. So do not support your prodigal emotionally. Show no empathy for your child's pain and distress. None. To to encourage it.
01:43:55
Speaker
I don't know if scripture teaches us that. I don't know. i would like to, I would like him to tell me what central to his viewpoints on why divorce is okay. And everything is like some chapter in Proverbs where it says like the, you're basically your words are wasted on a fool.
01:44:14
Speaker
he He interprets that as like anything that he needs to for its core to his belief system. Okay. But I think this part is really ah is great because he's talking about not being an enabler.
01:44:27
Speaker
Support a chronic, unrepentant sinner, and your child is choosing a pattern of sin. So do not support your prodigal emotionally. Show no empathy for your child's pain and distress. None. She's in pain and distress because of her choices. It's her own dumb fault. Jesus does not comfort and encourage sinners ever unless they're repentant. The apostle Paul does not comfort and encourage sinners. That's crazy.
01:44:50
Speaker
No, do not show emotional support or empathy. That's crazy. This guy is a terrorist. He's a kamikaze dolphin.
01:45:02
Speaker
ah
Parental Manipulation and Conditional Love
01:45:06
Speaker
Let's see what else. choose to sin Jesus and Paul lovingly and firmly call sinners out. We see it throughout the Bible, New Testament. They spoke the truth they moved on. i that This is annoying. I fucking hate these fucking charlatans, dude. Like the the amount of pastors on Jesus, just hanging out with people who don't give a fuck and then not repent. Like Jesus hung out with these people. Not it does. There's no there's no statement that every single person he hung out with who was a certain way repented or changed their ways. It didn't matter.
01:45:38
Speaker
It was bringing humanity to people whose humanity had been stolen. Jesus was blind. Jesus told Jesus told like it is. You know? Oh my God. That's why I like President Trump. He's like Jesus. He tells it like it is. He speaks like truth in love.
01:45:55
Speaker
I can tell you why I really hate people like this because I like less than 10 minutes ago. i was just like, what's the point? Why would I call myself Christian? And now I'm fucking going to bat for Jesus. Fuck this guy because he's making me a fraud. I want to hate him so much. I hate him. Jesus said, speak the truth in love. So call your gay son, the F slur. Yeah.
01:46:22
Speaker
You do what I want. support your prodigal financially i see this over and over again any money you give to your adult prodigal enables and nurtures and approves his sinful lifestyle you're stamping it with approval i'm not goingnna give a dime to one of my kids if they're off rejecting me, rejecting God. They're starting to choke off dicks in pain for Glorials. That should be, he should have that bookmarked because that's what every boomer wants to hear.
01:46:54
Speaker
Yeah. That's the absolute pinnacle of like what they want to see in this thing is like, you don't give them anything. Don't give them air anything. Yeah. They're like, I didn't refinance my home four times after making bad financial decisions because the investments I was told would be certain only to give the rest of my remaining dollars to a kid that's not even going to appreciate it and they're goingnna blow it up their nose or...
01:47:21
Speaker
put it in their throat. Yeah. I'm going to get a third home equity loan because the farmhouse aesthetic is out of style now instead of paying for my, my unrepentant gay son's college.
01:47:35
Speaker
I have to take out another home equity loan because my lower back hurts from driving trucks for so long. This is what it's what's funny about all of his advice, too, is like the level at which he takes it. So listen to what he thinks is not supporting them financially.
01:47:51
Speaker
Lifestyle. Why would I do that? A free country. They can do what they want, but I'm not going to support it in any way, shape form. He doesn't support a free country. And when our kids are walking with the Lord and doing what they need to do, hey, we'll give them anything within reason.
01:48:04
Speaker
Let your prodigal know that as long as chooses a meaningful lifestyle... You will not support him financially in any way. He's in college, he's paying for college. He's living in your home, you're kicking him out. You're not gonna pay for food. you're not There's no birthday gifts, no Christmas, nothing. That would all change if he repents.
01:48:22
Speaker
he's visiting broth He's visiting brothels, he's paying for sex. It's hilarious, too, because he doesn't really ever just like define what like being a prodigal is. It's just like stop calling him prodigal. The prodigal was the kid who returned. They're not a prodigal until they come back. They're not.
01:48:40
Speaker
No. Until that point, they're just another narc. yeah No Christmas gifts until you come back to Sunday school.
01:48:51
Speaker
But dad, I'm just not sure i've I'm kind of torn and conflicted about like, you know, the pastor told me I have to vote, you know, a straight Republican ticket or else I'm going to hell. is it He's like, God.
01:49:04
Speaker
no Christmas presents tell you they like the church and vote for Jesus I mean if they're like son son we don't agree with your lifestyle we can no longer give you Christmas presents every year and he's like that's fine I'm getting really tired of those read the bible in 365 days devotionals that you keep giving me for Christmas every year It's a really good it's a really good way time for like ah you know like the manipulative boomer parent to to throw in one of those things that they like to do. Like, well, you know, I got so-and-so an Apple Watch.
01:49:41
Speaker
But, you know, i just can't support your sinful lifestyle. And then you talk to that that cousin and they're like, oh, they didn't no they didn't give me anything. Like, they didn't get you an Apple Watch?
01:49:53
Speaker
No, they told me they got you an Apple Watch. They're like, they told me they gave you a $500 gift certificate. They said, they didn't get you an Apple Watch? No, they got me a subscription, a six-month subscription to watch Apple TV.
01:50:09
Speaker
That's so different. Dude, they just let you use their HBO Go password. but That's pretty good gift. That was that. We got them Apple Watch. And you're like, well, that's great. No, we let them... we let Yeah, we let them use our login to watch Apple TV. What if... it What if...
01:50:27
Speaker
What if all of this boiled down to like a boomer parent had been letting their kid use their their HBO password and then they found out that they were watching like ah the idol or something and they're like, this is full of nudity.
01:50:42
Speaker
I can't continue to support you financially. I'm changing my password until you vow not to watch until you vow not to watch True Blood reruns.
01:50:53
Speaker
Yeah. And then it like then they then it's just some like ah some Gen Z kid trying to guess the password and they're like, Capital H, heated, capital R, rivalry, 6969, exclamation point.
01:51:08
Speaker
I'm in!
01:51:13
Speaker
Thanks, Mom! Yeah, and if you really just want to sidestep all that, you just have to like out you you have to come out with it at dinner. You have to be like, yeah, you know, i was watching The Idol. I don't like all the gay stuff.
01:51:26
Speaker
That's upsetting to me. But other than that, it's pretty good show. Have you seen Landman?
01:51:33
Speaker
Dude, I like i like Landman because it's a Bell Pacific commercial with, ah you know, Billy Bob Thornton.
01:51:42
Speaker
I had no real like direction to go with this guy. I just hate his gut so much. And every time I watch a video of him, I just hate him. And I feel like he gives the worst advice. Yeah. And like the drifters do. It's just they get grifters give the kind of advice that makes you have to go back to them for money or cut your losses and never, ever interact with them again.
01:52:05
Speaker
That's what they want. So if I could if I could end on like one thing before we call it. Yeah. um
01:52:17
Speaker
See. OK, so. I. So in looking into this guy, you know, i was like. All right, I want to I want to see what.
01:52:29
Speaker
what does this look like? Like, what does he, his books, do they sell? What do people say about them? And they do seem to sell and people have given them a lot of good reviews, but, um, there was, uh, there was one review that I saw for it in his book called like, I want a divorce or whatever that I thought was,
01:52:54
Speaker
really interesting so this person hold up real quick give me a quick pause I got active. but So this is a person who left a review for the book. And I, this, this kind of spells it out. Like why this is more than just like crappy advice and an annoying guy says, I have read this book in support of understanding my mother's perception of reality and understanding the content that started her engagement with Dr. Clark. My review below encompasses this book, but also his teachings at large.
01:53:27
Speaker
Dr. David Clark's books have left a deeply unsettling impact on my family, particularly my mother, who sought them as a beacon of hope for her struggling marriage. While my mother's intentions were pure in seeking guidance, the contents of these books has proven to be more harmful than helpful.
01:53:42
Speaker
Our family has endured over 30 years of grappling with my mother's worsening bipolar disorder, which has exacerbated significantly over the past five years. Instead of providing genuine support, Dr. Clark's actions as a counselor have only exacerbated the situation.
01:53:57
Speaker
Despite my earnest attempts to connect with him and express my concerns about the harm he was inflicting upon my mother's perception of reality, he was unwilling to engage in in constructive conversation. This blatant disregard for her well-being while accepting payment for his services is utterly disheartening.
01:54:14
Speaker
So this is a person that didn't just read this book. This is a person who was doing counseling sessions with Dr. Clark. and ah refused to discuss it with her daughter um or even have a discussion about about it in any way.
01:54:30
Speaker
And this isn't an actual doctor. So I don't think this is not a doctor. This is not real counseling or therapy. So I don't think there's like any sort of HIPAA whatever going on here.
Misuse of Biblical Teachings in Therapy
01:54:41
Speaker
It's just he's a hardheaded prick that doesn't care how his ideology affects people.
01:54:47
Speaker
The most concerning aspect is the way Dr. Clark's books appear to exploit vulnerable individuals, particularly women who are seeking solace and guidance in the context of their relationships. His writings appear to manipulate biblical teachings to rationalize behaviors that are, at best, passive-aggressive, and at worst, overtly aggressive.
01:55:06
Speaker
Rather than advocating for responsible mental health care, his advice fosters a toxic atmosphere of mistrust and manipulation. completely ignoring the necessity of seeking proper treatment. The deliberate avoidance of using his medical license to counsel patients is a clear indication of his awareness of the potential consequences of his actions.
01:55:24
Speaker
This calculated approach only adds to the deeply concerning nature of his practices. The repercussions of Dr. Clark's influence on my mother have been severe and lasting. His misleading guidance has led her to embrace a distorted reality that endangers her physical safety and poses a threat to others around her. His books and counseling have discouraged her from seeking the critical mental health care she requires, disregarding the recommendations of her psychiatrist, and further destabilizing her well-being.
01:55:52
Speaker
The profound harm inflicted upon my family by Dr. Clark is irreparable, leaving us shattered and disillusioned. It's evident that his publications are not only irresponsible, but also serve as a means to exploit vulnerable families in their quest for genuine support. A stark warning is essential for those who might be tempted by his content. Steer clear of Dr. E. Clark's work, as it offers nothing but heartache and further distress.
01:56:17
Speaker
Damn. Dr. David E. Clark has a podcast that's current. What's it called? enough Enough is Enough podcast. Oh, I think he has a book called that too. Yeah. Almost all of his content is just like, buy my books, buy my web series, buy this, buy that.
01:56:38
Speaker
I wonder if he guests. What if he does guesting? Oh, dude, he would be awful. He was he's one that I feel like I would not want to talk to. He's on the short list of people. I'm like, no, I don't think I want that.
01:56:51
Speaker
Yeah, because he's too sure of himself. It wouldn't end up being fun or funny. It would just be listening to him be a narcissist. The irony being that he is a narcissist, and he would play all the same tricks and games that he talks about. Dude, he literally, in some of the videos, like he says, like, well, the narcissist won't do that. He'd rather die than do that, and we hope he dies.
01:57:16
Speaker
You're like... god that's okay that's a lot that's crazy yeah what are you holding in and who is this about and why do you have someone's name like in your brain when you say shit like that oh dude i hate my dad and i'm nothing like him like oh okay looking looking at any like viewing pornography is an affair and Women who appear in you know any of that type of content are skanks. He uses the word skank a lot to describe women he doesn't approve of. like He's still mad that his wife did porn that one time?
01:57:58
Speaker
His blonde wife? Maybe that's why he keeps saying it. My blonde, bimbo-ass wife. it is It is really bad stuff. and and it just seems like it just seems like brain poison for a generation of people. that like yeah They just crave that like concrete, 100% certain perspective from somebody like him that's just like, know what?
01:58:25
Speaker
That person is a narcissist. And you're right to like you know just completely peel away. And look, you got to leave. You got to take care of you. Figure out the kids later. Like that's usually his advice is like the narcissist is going to turn the kids against you. The kids are poisoned by his viewpoint. So don't talk to him about it. Don't explain yourself to them. Don't discuss any of the divorce with them or why you want to leave like nothing.
01:58:50
Speaker
It's like the best thing I ever did was leave my children and my wife and live a life on my own. It is crazy how little he seems to care about the kids in a marriage.
01:59:02
Speaker
Like, he doesn't... I mean, they're they're not even a consideration. i mean He's not okay. He was left... i want I bet his dad left him, or his mom, took off, and was a narcissist, and he's made his... He's like the fucking lame... act he's like It's just like if Batman...
01:59:21
Speaker
parents didn't get shot and killed and he got hit like while he was hiding in a back cave it was just like you your pair it's just like he's turned into a super villain he's turned into a super villain because his childhood wasn't perfect like everybody else and our now we have now we deal with it now we have to have like good people try to like counteract this type of shit yeah ah it's crazy.
01:59:46
Speaker
Yeah. I, yeah. Anyways, go follow Dr. Clark if you want a good chuckle or maybe you want to just get a little blood pump and tomorrow morning or something, get the rage flowing early. His face is annoying. He kind of has like a, um, uh, he reminds me of a guy, ah Edward, uh,
02:00:06
Speaker
No, not Ed. and Jim. Jim Norton. He kind of got Jim Norton. kind of looks like Jim Norton. He sort of looks like subterranean, like he he burrows.
02:00:19
Speaker
That's what I'd say he looks like. Like if Jim Norton was left in the pitch black for six months until his eyes atrophied, he'd kind of that yeah you just kind of like that. He'd just grow like skin right over the top. Don't need him.
02:00:34
Speaker
We operate off echolocation now. yeah All right, everybody. Well, ah thank you for listening. if you Hey, remember, we got a Discord where you can jump in and chat with us and a bunch of other cool people. If you find crazy stuff out there or a post that you think is funny or interesting or whatever, send it to us. We would love to see it. We have...
02:01:01
Speaker
have Thoroughly enjoyed any ah any posts and things like that that any that listeners have brought to our attention. so Send them our way. Have a great week, and we'll talk to you next time.