Ep. 280 – STRAIGHT PRIDE MONTH w/ Spencer Bland

Transcript

Speaker: um Dude, the crazy thing is I've actually been watching a lot of like older media. ah It started with like I would put on the Magic School Bus or Zubumufu on for Steve when I would leave the house. Oh, the Magic School Bus. I love the episode where the ah where Ms. Frizzle takes the kids into like the salmon stream and they get nutted on by a bunch of saying that. unloaded onto it's crazy and she's like it's crazy kids and they're like yeah what's this she's like telling him because they're eggs they're salmon eggs and they get just it's like it's like scene after scene of cartoon salmon blowing their entire load on these things it's phenomenal aquatic skroger yeah i love that's one my favorite bands

Speaker: Hello and welcome to Grown Up Christian. I'm Casey. And I'm Sam. And we are pleased to welcome back our friend, comedian Spencer Bland. What's going on, Spencer? Oh, nothing.

Speaker: Living in a new fresh hell every day, baby. Yeah, you really are. i'm ah I'm having a hard time plugging in each day. ha ha. I thought you were just to say waking up, and I was like, yeah, same, dude. It gets harder.

Speaker: You're out in Newsom territory. Yeah. Oh, yeah. You mean the greatest governor to ever grace the American landscape? He is a man of the people the people. Stacking that white bread, dude. Yeah, dude. He's not fucking you guys all over for AI data centers and big business. There's absolutely nothing wrong with Los Angeles or the state of California. It's perfect out here.

Speaker: I heard he's really cleaning up the homeless issue. Sure. Yeah. I heard it's like... just like uh meaning like cleaning their body parts out of a street sweeper yeah yeah yeah i think they just eliminated the distribution of narcan is what they were i was talking to a friend about that a couple weeks ago because we were we were driving by someone who was clearly going through something and uh my buddy was just like just don't like know how we deal with this and i was like brother we just give them the medicine that they need these people are clearly mentally unwell

Speaker: And he's like, but how do you even like come back from that? And I was like, have you never like, it just made me realize like he's never like dealt with anyone with like a, like ah ah a chemical imbalance in their brain. It's like, have you ever met met, never met anyone who's like had a schizophrenic episode and then seen them on their meds. They're two totally different people.

Speaker: right like i dude i remember when i was like 26 i went on i had like a i guess the kids will call it now a situationship but i was just having sex casually with this girl and every now and then she would text me like really insane shit like like you you you like out of like we'd have like a nice date and then like i'd go home and she'd text me she'd be like you piece of shit fuck boy you're gonna kill me my sleep aren't you yeah you're gonna you you want to kill me and i was like huh whoa i would like call her be like hey dude is everything okay and she would like just scream at me for like 30 minutes but unfortunately uh the sex was very good so i was like i was gonna say that's yeah and i was 26 so i was like okay uh i was like well i guess you know you just you hit me up whenever you want to hang out again and then after like a month of doing that she finally was like hey i'm really sorry uh i have like it was like personality BPD or something like personality disorder. And I was like, Oh, are you taking medicine for that? she's like, I am now. And she turned into like a totally different person.

Speaker: Yeah. she's home nice now So, well, I think the thing is like you, you handle them in the same way that you handle like a Malaysian crate in a chicken coop, like backing into a corner.

Speaker: You gotta have a nice, you know, a ah thick, wide-mouthed sack, and eventually, the darkness of the sack seems like the safest place to go. So they go in, they curl up, you tie off the top, and then you go and you release them in another state.

Speaker: ah And what are these? Oh, like a poisonous snake. Yeah. Oh, God. And that other state is your neighbor's yard, or in this case, Nevada. Yeah, dude, just give them to Nevada. Who cares? Dude, i my car broke down in a town. i don't i i can't remember if we talked. don't remember the last time we talked. Yeah, your Subaru, right? Yeah. Did did we talk already?

Speaker: for that We talked about ah you had work done, but it didn't get done. And then your car broke down and then you you got to ride with like some racist truck lady. Yeah, that was in Winnemucca, Nevada. And I just remember like hanging yeah dude hanging out with the two. like I thought they were like my age, the two dudes at the auto at the auto center there. And I was like, how old are you guys? And one kid was like 19. And the other kid was like, I'm 22.

Speaker: twenty two And I just remember asked them, i was like, what do you guys do here for fun? And like I didn't even get the word fun out of my mouth. And they were like drugs. Yeah. Those will put lines in your face. Yeah, dude.

Speaker: The great rural recesses of the country are all very similar in that regard. Where there's no recreational activity, you you drink yourself into an early grave. Yeah, dude. they He literally was like, we get drunk and run from the police because there's like two police here. And I was like, that's actually pretty awesome. They're all fat. Neither can they. I was like, I'm moving here. That sounds sick.

Speaker: Yeah, we had, there was someone, a family member, uh, Someone in the family, undisclosed which side. But um I lived in Nebraska and ended up getting into little bit of trouble when they went down the meth road, which I guess is pretty common.

Speaker: They are like It's bad when you when you strip people away from society but also introduce the means to make drugs. It's not. yeah also I mean, it creates a stable economy in certain respects. but Yeah.

Speaker: They end up having casual sex with Spencer. Yeah. Did I, uh, did I not tell you guys this might have to be saved for the end of the podcast. Maybe a nice, a nice going away bit, but, uh, I'll tease it here.

Speaker: Cause I think have we, we haven't had a, uh, episode since I went on tour. Have we? No. Okay. Then boy, do I have a fun story for you guys? Cause you said, you said Nebraska and it made me think of this. Uh, this is a billboard I passed on the way.

Speaker: The Testicle Festival. Yeah, I know exactly where you were. oh yeah, I guess it wasn't too far. Yeah, dude. I ended up looking up the website of the people who own that, and it is just the most closeted gay thing you'll ever see in your life. I love it. I'll read i'll i'll read the description and show that you guys afterwards. That'll be my sign-off for tonight. All right.

Speaker: I love it. It is funny that a town conveys its entire identity and economy around, like, Teehee Nuts. Literally the entire thing is like, l LOL, you guys ever heard of Balls? Like,

Speaker: While also like on the same website being like, we are a family oriented Christian restaurant. Of course they are. Yeah. Well, you know, you talking about your situation ship, I feel like a good intro, you know, a little moral checks and balances here. I wanted to play a clip for you guys that I think will, uh, will might convict you to. Oh, please.

Speaker: I can see the face. I can't. Why is this not happening? There's no, yeah I saw the clip and I was like, this is going to be good. Oh, it's so good. Hang on now. That's why we need to move towards the the live stream, get those clips in. Show me in the Bible where Jesus told you to suck somebody's penis.

Speaker: yeah when jesus told me That to sex, too. I used to be an oral sex, too. Honestly, girl, same.

Speaker: shake with jesus told us's to suck a waki and let yiuchi yeah that is oh us to be all sex too used to be to be a oral i used to be a oral sex dish she was honestly girl same Yeah, she goes into pretty graphic detail about her husband.

Speaker: dude like Oh, man, he is so mad his wife found Jesus. Yeah, that's just that's just a a different racist version of. ah Did you guys you guys remember forgetting Sarah Marshall when Jack Jack McBrayer's character? He's like he and his i can't remember the actress that plays his wife in the movie, but they're like the Christian newlyweds.

Speaker: why is jack bar yeah christian in everything because he's just he's like the perfect like closeted like straight or closeted like straight christian man that that innocence that ld he got that lds knock on your door vibe but his like wife is trying to convince him to like go to go down on on her and he's like no he's like god was a great city planner he wouldn't put a park next to a dump

Speaker: I remember ah there was a girl that I honestly I hated this girl she was in our sister dorm and I I purposely I like I wanted to talk to April sooner but I didn't because she hung out with this girl I thought like something's wrong she was the first she was the first boss you had to get through her I can't wait to ask you who it was Andy Daniele I don't even know that name Oh, she's been she's probably making some like senatorial whips life miserable. Like ah like ah ah

Speaker: a ladder climbing six. yeah Oh, my God. She was very passionate, though, about how that she would like she would get on her pulpit about how um all anal sex was sodomy.

Speaker: Dude, LOL. It is kind of funny how... Go ahead. I was going to say, it's funny how different Christians view anal sex. It's either a loophole or it's sodomy. There's no in-between. Yeah. It's not for the occasional fun. You're either all the way or not at all. Dude, my best friend... uh in high school uh unfortunately has passed away r.i.p griffin but he dated the same girl and i won't say who because i'm still friends with her uh for like six years from high school all throughout college and then remember they they ended up breaking up and he and i were just hanging out one night and he was like yeah dude uh he's like the entire six years where we were together she never

Speaker: like gave her virginity to me or whatever, while however he phrased it or whatever. And I was like, what do you mean? I was like, you guys talked about having sex all the time. And he's like, yeah, we were just having anal sex. And I was like, that's insane, dude. For six years. That's nuts. Like,

Speaker: Like, that's great. You know what's so funny? Because if you think of, think going back to like Christian era us, right? Yeah. If you entered into a relationship with a woman, with the, with the brains that we had at the time, and you found out,

Speaker: on your wedding night or shortly after that they had just had six years worth of anal sex. You would be like, you why didn't you just fuck? That's so much different. Like that's so much effort. to do It's like, it's,

Speaker: It's crazy. It's so nuts. It honestly made me feel very different of him and, and her to be honest too. But like, I was just, there was one night where they literally were like locked in my bathroom for like four hours. Like we were having a party at my house and they were just in the bathroom the whole time. And I was like, Oh my God, they were just doing butt

Speaker: shit. 45 minutes of fun and three and a half hours of cleanup. Yeah, dude. Like they were just prepping and cleaning. What is it it? There was a scene in ah the righteous gemstones where,

Speaker: um Danny McBride's character walks in a room and he's like, why does it smell like fucked buttholes in there? And that has stuck with me. That comes to mind very frequently. I just bought his book.

Speaker: Oh, nice. i have I didn't even know he had one. That's sick. Yeah. I don't even know where I put it. That's a dude who grew up Christian. Yeah. I'd love to hear more about that. accidentally bought the large print version, so I look old as fuck reading it. Because it's got a it literally has a giant irremovable sticker on the front that says large print version. i'm like You just have to squint when you read it in public. People will feel blind. I'm like, God damn it.

Speaker: I was to figure there'd be a lot of seniors reading his book. Yeah. but It's like a movie it's like okay so a collection of short stories. supposed to be I thought I had it like within reaching distance. Anyway, what were you gonna say? I'm going to and find this. I was going ah you been up well you just walked away to find something. I was gonna found it!

Speaker: oh yeah That was quick. you must been reading The Thrilling Tales of Modern Men. oh As you can see, large print version. I really like her on the cover. Yeah, yeah so the cover's cool. It's nice.

Speaker: all the All the people that I enjoy. I think, i don't know, Danny McBride is really big in the like liberal white guys that say retarded demographic. Mm-hmm. It's a good demographic. Yeah, it's the one I'm in. I'm posting it i'm posting a dude.

Speaker: You were about to say something. Sorry. and I was just going step into what you've been up to, but I will let you carry on. Oh, I think, oh, actually, this sways in. I just did this really cool show. did Largo in L.A., which was awesome. Yeah, I saw that, man. I was super stoked for you, really proud of you. You're yeah fucking sick, man.

Speaker: Congratulations. It's always cool to do something in L.A. that like people, like friends that I have out here are like, oh, I've been here for 10 years and I haven't done that. So was like, oh, that's cool. Yeah, that's huge, man. Went super well. I was opening up for this guy, Cliff Cash. you Honestly, I think would be a fun a guest for you guys to have.

Speaker: ah He's ah ah ah one of those guys that like I haven't really kept in great touch with, but we you know we started in the same place and know each other from way back when. So he was coming through, he was like, oh, dude, open for me.

Speaker: And I was like, hell really cool him too, man. I love when people like – remember where they came from you know yeah and that was his that was his whole thing he was like remember who they came on if i could um but no i've got it's funny because he he's uh he's i didn't realize this because i don't really look at my friends social media uh he's blown up he has like 400 000 followers now which is why he was able to do largo because you know he can move tickets like that and uh know he's got a very a very liberal crowd he's he's leftist but you know they

Speaker: Without saying too much, anyone who's like talk shit about Donald Trump on stage, people are going to be like, yeah. And I've got this joke that I've been trying because I, you know, hearkening back to me saying white guys who say retarded. um I have this joke where I talk about my, my, I have a ah ah big, matt I mean, all my answer MAGA, but I have one who is just like unabashedly annoying about it.

Speaker: And ah she, she sent me a, this was months ago, but she sent me a text that was like, I had posted something about Trump and Epstein and she sent me ah an article that was like,

Speaker: oh, the Epstein files are actually a secret false flag operation run by a ah a CIA sleeper cell agent installed by Joe Biden. And I was just like, what the? Literally, dude, that was like. I wish just Joe Biden knew what the CIA was doing. That would have been nice if he knew literally what anyone was doing anywhere. And it was, she is the mom of my only other liberal cousin. So I like reached out to her and I was like, hey, you know, I love you, but I'm about to call your mom like a lot of names. I was because I don't care anymore. and i i lit into her and then i was like i gotta write a joke about this because that exactly like what your response you just had casey like it's just an insane news article headline like is that really what you guys believe and i it was so hard writing the joke and the joke that it's a much longer thing but the ending is that it's like it sucks to lose a family member to maga you know because like i i really i genuinely like respected her she was my aunt margaret She was ah a public, she was in public education for 40 years. Like she was a teacher. I really respect that about her. She's a special ed teacher, which think is so cool. And then the joke, I go, that's crazy because now she's retarded.

Speaker: um And I, when I was opening for Norman, I was doing it that way and it was totally fine. His audiences, you know, they love the R word. You cannot say that out here in LA. Like you, you can, if you're a certain person, but like someone who's still getting set up. Also, I was like first time in a theater I've never been to. I don't want to like,

Speaker: You know, we view it a certain way, but there's some people who view retarded and they'll like absolutely fly off the lid and try to like destroy your life over saying it, which is which is retarded. um And so now I just i I end the joke by I say I'm like, oh, yeah, she was a public education for 40 years. I really respected that. She taught special ed and that like gets people. They go, oh, and then I go, yeah, it sucks because now she's in it.

Speaker: And it's so funny because like that it's, it's helped me be able to do the joke out here, but I did it. I did it at Largo and it it did great, but it obviously got some groans and it's funny because I just ended and i was like, guys, we got to get meaner. Like, I don't know what to tell you. you It's true. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. It's a, it's a sort of word that, ah you know, you just pick your audience a little bit, I guess, but you call your shot. It is also the word that like somebody who would be like,

Speaker: Well, you know, there is there's been a lot of, you know, ah war crimes on both sides. Yeah, it's ah it's a very like that formative. It's a performative woke ism. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, that's pretty much it. There's been bunch of those lately. Oh, big time. I did Largo, and then ah the week after we went out and did ah the show at the Sebastiani Theater in Sonoma, which was that was a good time.

Speaker: ah It's like an hour north of San Francisco. Very very cute little town. Very rich. Very old. Good God. Was the crowd very old? The crowd was ancient. That must change the feel. Maybe you're not as ageist as I am. I'm a little ageist. No, I am. Okay. when I perceive you to be a certain age, I immediately believe that you're not listening to me say words. You have 45-minute story you're looking to tell.

Speaker: Yeah, and it's just like – I don't know, man. It's like you can just tell when a crowd is not really going to enjoy your shit. you know Like they were – I had a good set. It was fun. It wasn't – Largo was like one of the best sets of my life, which thank God because there's a couple couple industry people there that hopefully – liked what they saw but who knows but uh that's a that's a very unpredictable world it's tough to brother if i have man if i have one more person tell me and i'm not go to say what kind of person uh tell me that i don't have enough instagram followers i'm going to lose my goddamn mind i Dude, you this is why musicians in comics yeah like have like kindred spirits. like

Speaker: ah Because I have... i have ah Chris Oberholzer has been on this podcast before. He's in a band called Tan and Handsome. They're phenomenal. Phenomenal band.

Speaker: um it It's just like... i don I forget how he described it when they were on, but it's just it's chaotic, but chaotic. It's very like I just I love it. I think what they're doing is great. um And they, you know, he he's he's he's in that world.

Speaker: he does, you know, he goes on tour with ah he does merch for Greyhaven. Yeah. um You know, they've played plenty of shows with larger bands like August Burns Red, I believe. Hell yeah. they've Because they're like it locally, like they're the band that you would get. Yeah. If you're if you're pulling up someone.

Speaker: um the hot while you're on tour. Yeah. And, um but yeah, that's what he, that's, he says the same thing. He's like, oh yeah, you try to get anywhere. And they're like, well, you, you have less than a thousand followers on Spotify. And it's like, yeah what happened to, what happened to labels existing to scout talent and decide that they can make this band something? Because now it's like,

Speaker: the now it's like what's your job what is your job what do you even do and it feels like you saying that made me be like get alone similar in college their job is their job is to take money from you now yeah like literally dude like i had i actually i mean i am indifferent towards how i view them i am both angry but also appreciative for the advice they gave me but like I sat down with this touring agent and they were like, look, I think you've got a lot of promise. And like, I think I could, I could sell you really well. And like, you're super talented. But at the end of the day, like I'd be pitching you to small rooms at clubs. You'd be making a thousand dollars on the weekend. Then I'd be taking 10% of that, which is what only a hundred bucks for me. It's just not really profitable. And I was like, cool. So she literally was like, she's like, once you get bigger and like, you're, you know, you can start booking bigger places. I'd love to work with you. And I was like, well, if I'm already booking them myself, why would I need you?

Speaker: right At that point, right you've already done the legwork. I mean, ah then it just comes down to focusing on other things while they book your shit, but it that's crazy. It's just this crazy vicious cycle of like, they used to be the ones who would help you make it.

Speaker: And now it's almost where it's like you're the ones that help them stay in business. Because capitalism steals everybody's dreams. yeah I mean, because like at one point it was like people got into something like that, because like a talent agent shit because you're like, I'm passionate about this. I believe in in helping people succeed. i love that it's a viable business.

Speaker: And now it's like – For you to be talent agent and finding talent, well, they might have. wasn't Must have used to. People are the same, dude. Now you can circumvent them. But the incentive structures change. The incentive structures change is what I'm saying.

Speaker: Yeah. it is It is quite frustrating. But... If there are any talent agents out there, actually at this at this point, it's like, I don't even really need them. I mean, not that I'm doing well enough that I don't need them, but it's like, I have, I have friends who are at the same level that I am and they have representation and they're like, Oh, they don't do anything for me.

Speaker: Yeah. It's so weird. had to like, Akash Singh's wife just got signed to a talent agency. That's true. What? That's crazy. And I'm sure she's going to, she's income shortly. Is that the weird guy that's from?

Speaker: like oh yeah. That dude. Yeah. Oh yeah. He's on, he's on the, he's on the downward path. Yeah. He's been publicly shamed and embarrassed a lot. um I genuinely kind of, I, no, I don't feel bad for any of those dudes.

Speaker: They're a miserable couple. Yeah. They should just be miserable together. Yeah. i feel cominglington I feel a little bad for him. I do feel a little bad for him. i I mean, yeah, he's he's laying in the bed that he made. Sure. Yeah.

Speaker: It's just ah he got honey trapped, I guess. It's just too bad. What can you do? But yeah, other than that, I see someone go down like that. Things are going all right out here in Los Angeles. You know, got a good video series is great. You're a straight pride. I know. they're Awesome.

Speaker: I got to film a couple more tomorrow morning. They are like, I will say they are an absolute bummer to film. No, Aren't you running out? No, dude. I have a, I'm not, I should have, I should have named it straight pride quarter. Cause I've got like, and also people like send people DM me like news articles from like their hometown where they're like, oh this pastor did this. And I'm like, God, this sucks. Yeah. um Let's see. How many do I have left right now? I've got I've got 13 left. I don't know if I'm to do all of them because some of them. This is insane to say some of them aren't as bad.

Speaker: i mean, they're all they're all related to child sex crimes from like conservative pastors or conservative influencers, but some of them only mess with one kid. Yeah. 13. That's like a men's retreat for the Southern Baptist Convention all in one.

Speaker: But yeah, it's been I, I, I don't even really know. Oh, I saw the Robert Morris thing, which was like, that was the first one that I was like, yeah. And I was like, I want to make a video out of that. And then your phone is constantly listening to you. i don't know if you guys know that.

Speaker: ah And I opened Reddit and it showed me there's like an anti-pastor subreddit, which is just full of news articles from that Reddit. Is it the pastor arrested? That's what it is. Yeah, pastor arrested. Yeah, we're on that a lot. It is. Oh, I'm not on that one. They're moralizing. Yeah, it's like, it's it's one of those things where it's like, ha ha, l LOL, of course these motherfuckers are doing this. But then when you actually step back, you're like, oh my fucking God, these guys are doing this. Like, it's just so...

Speaker: I go to it as an example. When i'm when I talk to people about pedo-con theory and they think you just made something up, it's like, oh, hold up. Let me go ahead and open Reddit real quick. And I'm like, here's 15 news articles from the past week of a pastor arrested for doing something fucked. it's all I will say my favorite one was the Thank You, Jesus guy. ah doing child porn. That was hilarious to me. Yeah.

Speaker: ah Well, hilarious hilarious within reason, but you know what I mean? Yeah. I guess the irony is hilarious. There were so many of those signs around. Yeah, they literally – like after the election, it's like every Trump sign just got replaced by a thank you Jesus sign. That's one of those funny things too. At least they're in the right place. You probably started out with one guy, and he got – he like sold a bunch of them, and then people just started like making their own. And you could just see the same guy driving around and being like, that's not an officially licensed one. Yeah. That's not a thank you Jesus official sign. People with a seasoned assist. There's an entire like company behind it now, which is crazy.

Speaker: Of course. Why not? Yeah. No, I've got, I've got some fun ones coming up. I've, uh, I think the one tomorrow, i mean, they're popping out tomorrow or when wait tomorrow is Wednesday. Uh, who fucking knows, dude. Uh, this guy, uh, this pastor in Ohio who just looks, he looks like he'd be an extra and like Dutton ranch. Um,

Speaker: uh, was, ah grooming and holding like special Bible studies with a minor at his church. And then was obviously, uh, raping that little girl, unfortunately. And then, but he was, but his sermons were all like, LGBTQ is, is a mental health disorder. Like we got to fix it. And it's like, brother, you're having sex with, you're, you're illegally having sex with children. Like, what are you doing?

Speaker: Oh man. Took her under his bat wing. It's the regular red flag is like the harder you go against. Always, dude. It is that it.

Speaker: but I mean, half of the ones I'm past arrested is like anti-gay pastor. Yeah. arrested For doing gay shit. You're like, yeah, no, fuck. The one I did the other day was the the CEO of my faith votes, which is like a, they say they're a nonpartisan Christian voting outlet, but then you look at their website and it's like, there's only one part on this website. Yeah. They say you're nonpartisan Christian voting. If you're yeah putting Christian and voting in a sentence, it's obvious. What are you doing? You're not just mobilizing people to.

Speaker: They have a prayer guide on our passion about democracy. That's not a thing. They have a prayer guide on their website ah for Donald Trump. It's like how to pray for Donald Trump. And I'm like, that's insane. Was that up there when Biden was president?

Speaker: Definitely not. These people are frauds. Dear Lord, please take him. do that' I genuinely think ah this will this will l ah this is my biggest gripe with Christianity right now because like I've got a but a bunch of friends who are still Christians, and they they go to like they go to what are perceived like good Christian, you know i guess, quote-unquote liberal churches. And it's like, yeah, but are you guys like actively preaching against what is going on in your faith right now? Because I'd i'd wager a solid 70% of Christian congregants in the United States are being radicalized towards fascism via, you know, Christo or Christo fascism. And it's just like so frustrating where it's like, I'll have friends like share, you know, reel from their church, which is just, you know, insane that your church is a social media team, but whatever. Yeah.

Speaker: And it's like, guys, we're just going talk about how, you know, how we're going little boys and how how men are going to, you know, really, really fight for the kingdom through, through kindness and love. And it's like, yeah, that's cool. But I think we're kind of past that i think you guys need to start talking about how you're going to, uh, like start like getting these people out of this mindset. Cause your, your religion is being fucking hoarded by these dudes right now, dude.

Speaker: Yeah, it's it's completely co-opted. um coopth i don't I'm at the point now where I'm like, what is he what what are you even co-opting? like there's been There's never been, outside of, you know I'm sure the Catholic Church has evolved some, but not as much as the rest, like outside of like Catholicism, which has its problems, so I'm not i'm not going to bat for Catholicism.

Speaker: But like it's just been various iterations of co-opted language for 1500 years like it's not it's one big game of telephone when people are like oh what like there's like the r slash true christian that casey and i'll like pull stuff from and and peruse and it's like yeah it's not there's true christian is the most misnomer thing on the planet it's not there's no real thing there's no real true christian because every every denomination's independent to an extent yeah

Speaker: If they're like if you were Southern Baptist but had a disagreement, you're like, well, now we're non-denominational. It's like, it's just so funny, dude. There is like, yeah, you could be, you could just go, yeah, well Christianity, go back to Jesus, uh, which I think would be great. Like, don't get me wrong. Um, but like Christianity also has like the entire old Testament and Paul, which had some terrible ideas and no, no, Jesus, Jesus got rid of the old Testament dude until it's convenient. and Yeah. Except for the parts I like.

Speaker: Yeah. And so you're like, okay, this is, this is, it's just, so you find the parts you like, and then you're like, well, all scriptures, God breathed and Jesus is God. Therefore Jesus agrees with this. And you're like, yeah now we're just, we're not even fucking doing anything. This isn't even a real semantics, man. Where's the floor? Where is the floor by which it's a vague old book?

Speaker: Yeah. There's too many, too many, uh, blanks to color in. Where'd you guys go to school again? libertyber Liberty University. you Okay, you guys did. Okay, sick. you'll You'll appreciate this then. I was doing a Don't Tell show. um it I don't know. Hermosa Beach, I think, is where it was. And ah the comic before me was like doing crowd work. i don't remember what he was saying, but he like he asked one guy, because the guy was wearing a Liberty University hat.

Speaker: you know, but what is it like the L you u and, uh, uh, which is crazy that this kid knew that. because this is like a, this guy's like 24 and he's a comic, like from orange County, but he's like Oh, that's Liberty university. Right. And then you could tell the audience member was like, yeah, he like, but also here's a fun thing about LA County or like this area, the beaches are Republican.

Speaker: It's so weird. Like, I don't understand why, but for some reason, all the coastal towns are like super Republican with the exception. Yeah. Um, So he like, he's like, oh, Liberty University. The guy was really weird. And he goes, the comic was like, you guys don't like gay people, right?

Speaker: and the comic or or the guy in the crowd was like, Oh no. I mean, we, we love everybody. And the, the dude just, like he just left it at that. But then I got on stage and I was like, brother, I know what you're talking about. yeah i was like, I was like, I'm not from too far from you. I was like, you're trying to hit him with the hate, the sin, love the center, aren't you?

Speaker: and And he was like, well, yeah. And then I just went in. Cause I remember, i mean, this was like back when I was in high school, I had like a, uh, uh, I guess a elder at my church was like a senior at Liberty and he was like my mentor or whatever. And i remember him telling me that he, they couldn't have rated movies in the dorm. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. I had to pay a fine. Cause I watched you for Vendetta. I brought that up. I brought that up to him and I was like, it socialists though it was so funny. I was like, I was like, you guys couldn't even have R rated movies in your dorm. And he was like, he was so flabbergasted. He's like, well, well, no, that's actually a common misconception.

Speaker: And I, and then I just hit, I was like, you guys are watching crazy porn though, weren't you? Like, All incest. Yeah, dude. Fish rots from the head down. The president was out getting his wife pounded by a pool boy at the time. so twode that's What was his name again?

Speaker: Jerry Falwell. yeah your Jerry Falwell Jr. That's right. Whoa, don't, yeah don't, but don't besmirch seniors name like that. I shouldn't. That was silly of me. DNA match. The pool boys. Smegma.

Speaker: That's how they caught him. That's a word I haven't heard in a long time. Dude, I'm throwing it out. Okay. I'm throwing it out in favor of Skroger. Oh God. Dude.

Speaker: but both Both give me visceral reactions, which means they are good words. so It's it's like i could ah like when I think about Little Caesars, I can still smell it like in the yeah front little counter area of Kmart back in the day. Remember they had Little Caesars in Kmart? Back when men were men.

Speaker: Smegma induces a smell. Yeah. I didn't know Little Caesars was Kmart. You didn't know that, dude? Yeah, dude. Kmart used to full-scale cafeterias in the front, dude, with like a slushy machine what and Little Caesars. Oh, dude, it was the best. Yeah. A little little VCR TV combo, and I would sit in a little square pizza and watch a troll in Central Park.

Speaker: yeah I must have got the tail end of Kmart in New England. That is so funny. Ours were like job lots. If I'm remembering correctly, I feel like ours were like job lots.

Speaker: Maybe not. here's ah Here's a fun one. No, Kmart. Was that a department store? Yeah, yeah. The Blue Light. Blue Light Special. Blue Light Maybe. yeah okay. Not job lots.

Speaker: are used to Are they still around are they all gone? ah There's like maybe three left in America. Yeah. I actually had a job for a minute tearing like tearing all the scrap metal out of a closed down. Whoa. A mark in Detroit.

Speaker: And by job, you mean ah what you did while you were on amphetamines at night. looking for copper yeah they were just stripping all the copper wire out of the Kmart it was still in business but they didn't know I made it like three days I had to work with the owner's kid who was ever fun he was strange he was over the top guy oh he's trying to overcompensate far yeah and razzed a little too much there was like a file cabinet we threw into the dumpster, you know, like with all the scrap metal stuff. And there was like a dirty pair of panties in it.

Speaker: Oh my God. ah I like pick them up and I just like, like tossed them at him. Yeah. And him being over the top guy, he freaked out and he held me down and pulled them over my head. Like, Oh my God. ah It's like, I'm out of here. I'm done with this after today. Yeah. I'm not trying to get MRSA. like Yeah. yeah time We did a youth group activity to a Lansing lug nuts game, which is like their minor league team. Yeah.

Speaker: They had a fireworks like show at the end. It wasn't 4th July or anything. They just have a like a handful of fireworks. yeah And I remember that kid stood and saluted the whole time and then yelled America at the end. Yeah.

Speaker: He can't be doing well. That's a level of autism that like is just crazy to think about. yeah Specific strain. That's the college Republican strain of yeah autism. You know he loved ROTC. Yeah.

Speaker: yeah He's a real Pete Hegseth with it. Yeah, dude. i watch I saw this clip today of a kid at some baseball game who was sitting during the national anthem, and this old guy behind him was, like, yelling at him to stand up. Yeah. And he was like, if you don't stand up, I'm going smack you. And the kid's just standing there like, what the fuck? like Or sitting there. Yeah. And the old dude just, like, bitch slaps him across the back of the head.

Speaker: And the kid just kind of like everyone kind of turns and looks. The kid slowly stands up and is just like ends up just kind of standing there, like standing for the anthem. I'm like that kid.

Speaker: Look, I I'm sorry that happened to him, but I don't respect him. Yeah. Yeah. you should have stayed seated you're already hit absolutely now stayed seated just make a point he's not he wasn't about to actually hurt you but the everyone around was like completely aghast uh that guy's like what are you looking at like getting all like it's it's like that that's what your over the top guy is probably because yeah yeah he probably already is i so I saw one of those a week or so ago, and it was a guy, it was in like a gas station or something like that, like a big gas station. Yeah. And this guy had two little girls with him, and he took them into the women's restroom restroom to go to the bathroom. Like, he's by himself with two little girls. He walked them in, took them in the stall so they could go to the bathroom. Oh, yeah, I saw that.

Speaker: The boomer guy just screaming at him and recording him. He's This guy's in the women's bathroom. He's in the women's bathroom. He's washing his hands. He's washing his hands. And just like freaking out. And it's like so out of place. He's like, and his little girls are like crying and clearly scared of like this weird old guy. Somebody should hit this guy.

Speaker: Like that's dude. That's the thing is like people. We got we got to start punching more people in the face, you guys. Or or at least just going for the knees. Like you you guys seen this motherfucker, Jake Lang, like showing up places. Yes, he sucks, dude. He likes and it's like, first off, it's like.

Speaker: I don't think people understand these dudes get off at trolling. I don't actually think they care about this like dumb fucking weird MAGA racist shit they're grifting on. They literally just want to piss people off. They're the same thing. Like, have you guys ever seen the old dudes who just the live stream? They they're they have goggles on face mask. They're covered so that you can identify them and they'll just live stream you.

Speaker: And their whole thing is they want to rage bait you. So they so you you go after them so they can get a clip from that. But if you just if you just ignore them, then they have nothing. They have no content and they just go away. They like show up at the flea market that I go not the flea market, the farmer's market I go to every Sunday. And it's so depressing because it's just like, dude, it's so funny. It's just a like you'll be like in the ah the farmer's market area and they can't legally go in. So they're just out here just like holding their camera, like looking at you.

Speaker: yeah ah And like if you if you like look at them, they'll try to like they'll kind of like nod at you. But like they like they're well known in the area now. And people are like, yeah, just don't if you don't talk to them, they go away because they can't get a rage clip out of you. It's like, well, isn't there are a horror movie where if you ignore it, it can't hurt you?

Speaker: what I mean, T-Rex's site is based on vision. So, you know, just can't just don't move. That's ah the Chad the Builder thing. It's like, yeah, you don't don't play along. like I went to a, ah I went to see. Or if you do make sure that you get them put in prison for a while. Yeah.

Speaker: You gotta, you gotta to draw first. He's Greedo in your Han Solo. Exactly. yeah I went to a Noah Kahn concert hell yeah at Fenway and geez, that is the most new England thing. Yep. It really is. We got Dick. It's like the, a couple days before the show, yeah a friend of ours got them and they were really, really cheap. Obstructive view. Very cheap. Yeah. We probably paid less than anybody to be there. So hell yeah, wouldn't turn it up. Like ah you can't be like, Oh no, I'm, I'm not taking it. Yeah.

Speaker: But, um, it's the women's bathroom lines were nuts like yeah i'd imagine 85 that crowd was 200 feet long you know and then the men's room you could just walk right into so one point i go into the men's room and there's just like 12 women's hell yeah dude waiting to use the which i think is gross like i think they're brave i i respect them all like don't know you're i don't i can't you been to women's restroom every every one of those toilet seats piss covered yeah um but like then all the urinals are like it's that old school like venue shit you know it's like the trough like two inches it's not a trough but they're like two inches apart and there's oh hell yeah so everyone's just dicks out at the urinal and it's just like my favorite time it's like

Speaker: Early, early twenties, fifties, sixties, like just a whole bunch of ladies just like waiting for the toilet seat. Just wants to lose it. Lindo right now. This is crazy. It felt a little weird for me. Yeah. I was like, feel a little bit, a little bit weird, but like no one's looking. They're just waiting to use the bathroom with their eyes forward, being respectful. It's like, this is equity because they're going to piss their pants before they get to the toilet in the women's line. Like,

Speaker: We just could. And women's rooms are all stalls. Men's rooms have an extra 200 fucking urinals. it's We're all pissing. Sometimes it's not even a urinal. it's just It's just a giant tub with ice in it. The troughs are crazy. Yeah. Yeah. I don't rarely see those anymore. Very rarely. Yeah. I think I've only seen one personally once.

Speaker: Imagine being a European showing up here and you're like never seen an ice cube before. And here we are just like whizzing on them. well we're just wasting them i think they're more i think they're more shocked by all the circumcised penises like that is true the soviets showing up in like uh eastern germany and being like oh my god indoor electricity you guys have clean water You're telling me your air conditioners aren't set to 78 degrees? Dude, that's the crazy thing to me. I was talking to a buddy about it because I've i've got ah a good – actually, you guys would probably enjoy having him on the podcast. Jake Steers is very funny ah British comic living in London.

Speaker: and you know They went through one of those crazy heat waves. yeah and He like posted something where like people died. and I was like – i was like Hey, man, ah like, no, not trying to like disrespect the dead or anything, but like, how?

Speaker: Like what? And he told me, he's like, well, the houses here are literally made to keep heat in. Whereas like, where ours are the opposite. He's like, also like, they're just, they're not built for ventilation.

Speaker: They're not also like, yeah, no one has air conditioning. But I'm like, maybe eventually you guys should just start maybe adding that in. like because their climate their climate never really has required it so when they get hit by a gnarly heat wave yeah they're i don't even know if they're they're um their grid can handle it like it's not set up for it's not set up to have like 30 000 people put in air conditioners all that is true they didn't even have the like the supply for that demand That's our future, dude.

Speaker: I was going to say, we're fucked, dude. The former Great Navy has two ships left in it, and everybody thinks you're a laughingstock. Yeah. While the royal family is all incestuous and like air conditioning.

Speaker: Yeah, you're living vicariously through through like, ah you know, armed resistance in Eastern Europe or something. Not only do we have air conditioning, we have multiple kinds of ice. We have crushed, we have cubed, we have pebble, we have racist. It's all the kinds of ice. Isn't that Jake Lang guy like ah he's like an Israeli like agent provocateur isn't he? Yeah his whole thing is he just like goes places and says racist shit. It's like that um what's that fucking that little short fat comedian that's like bla Ben Bernanke or whatever. Have you guys seen him?

Speaker: no oh yeah he's like i'm pretty sure that's his name he sucks no ben bernanke ben bernanke is an economist um yeah yeah he was with the fed or something i think would be there's like ah what is this guy's name no that ben bernanke is also a comedian or something like that they were roasting him on lemon party i think like last week or something Yeah, because he's i don't know why I can't find this guy's name. He's telling really funny trans jokes. Ben Bankus, B-A-N-K-A-S. He's he's terrible. He literally it's like it's like every joke that your racist uncle shares on Facebook. That's like his act.

Speaker: And he he it's he caused a big fuss because the New York Comedy Festival like put him as a headliner this year. Oh, I think I saw clips of this guy. Yeah, he's dog shit, dude. like not even It was like a YouTube channel ripping on yeah he's like why a guy like this is... like Why a guy like this headlining some festival? It's terrible. But he like came out and he was like... well, he's like, I'm just a comedian. He's like, I just say that stuff because it gets a rise out of the audience. And it's like, no, motherfucker, we're not stupid. Well, some people are, but it's like most people are not dumb enough to fall for that shit. It's like, we know that you actually believe this shit.

Speaker: Like, yeah, same thing where like Jake Lang will come out and be like, well, I'm just asking questions. And it's like, okay. like Yeah, you're just a yeah classy grifter like Jeff Dye. You know, I was just, I was just shooting a skit with some friends earlier this afternoon. We were talking shit about him.

Speaker: It's funny, dude. he is. I hope I get to interact with him one day ah because ive I hosted for him years ago back in Raleigh and he was just an absolute pain in the ass.

Speaker: And i i just I just want to interact with him because he's like – he's like – he's not standoffish in person because this whole thing is like, well, why can't we just get along? I'm a human. You're a human. And it's like, well, because you don't think most humans have rights. Like I just hate that. He just ashed your cigar on the top of my head. That's why. i just hate that dumb conservative bullshit where it's like, no, I love everybody. It's like shut the fuck up, dude. Yeah.

Speaker: But I just would love to like see him like we do a show together so I can just be like, hey, I need you to know everyone hates you. Like you have you have no friends, my dude. Like I'm not even coming at you. Everybody talks about you behind your back. Like I'm not even going to come at him for the things that I can come at him for. I'm not going to be like your fucking shit's hack. Everything sucks. It's like, no, genuinely no one in l LA comedy likes you. You have no friends. You have no hoes.

Speaker: Everyone talks shit about you. i hate saying this as an advocate for mental health, but I think you should kill yourself.

Speaker: I think it's the right thing to do. Yeah. If you want, you can go to another country and just get euthanized. Yeah, pod.

Speaker: Get in the pod, dude. Get him in here. He should be fertilizer. It's crazy, man. Hot dog. That's why I'm glad if I... Because, like, Jake Lane came to L.A. like a couple weeks ago, and, like, he was over but in, like, the... ah I don't can't remember the name. It's like ah like the Plaza Linda or something. it's like we like It's like the iconic Mexican market. And, you know, he's, of course, holding signs and saying inflammatory shit and like people beat the shit out of him.

Speaker: Great. And like all these fucking liberals on Twitter, like we can't do that, you guys. We can't do i was like, I actually think we should go for the knees. was like, people are aiming for the head.

Speaker: i was like, go for the knees first. Then he can't get away. i

Speaker: Casey, your gain shot crazy up. Mine, really? No, Casey's. Oh, it did, yeah. Yeah, you can hear like all your breathing. Is that better? No, way down.

Speaker: like I can hear the... your at atmosphere there we go okay sorry i thought i was having a picture what i did there it's fine it was like i don't you must have hit something but it was like all sudden like i just i'm just hearing the air around you yeah just doing a uh adenoid health dude my my airpods have been doing that because they're like four years old now so you know obviously apple is apple sent the they're like oh he's had him too long send the software update yeah and like whenever i send someone a voice note with my airpods in it it it actually records everything except my voice

Speaker: dude sam you uh you said you had a good reddit post for us oh i do let me uh let me go ahead and pull that up um It was, this one's peculiar.

Speaker: It's, it's, I haven't really seen one like this. I, there are, there are similar threads that we get on Reddit. And um you know what?

Speaker: I'm afraid. ah Oh, no, take it down. No, I was afraid it was. um whoo Thank God. shit It might be because I saved it. And so it might've been,

Speaker: fake but i think i got it okay it's here oh my god i just guess i forgot what the day is say that was good because i've lost i've i've gone to pull up a couple that were gone by the time we were recording because the reddit community is pretty good at flagging certain things for like just being trolly or fake in these subreddits um But yeah, it's this is ah the the subject line for this one is lust before and after marriage. So we do have that lust through line. um

Speaker: but this one takes a new and unique turn that I think is very relevant for today's zeitgeist. It's always something, isn't it? All right. Already starting off too casual. He's trying to play. That's the opening line. Yeah. I think they're just, there's some vibes here. Just like, dude, you're, you're overselling why you're normal, which makes me you actually scared for what's really going on here.

Speaker: Um, When I grew in love and got married to my wife, I knew marriage wasn't a cure for lust, but I thought it would at least help a bit. And honestly, it did.

Speaker: But like I first said, there's always something new to worm its way in. fantasizing is okay. I real quick, just a quick note. This is a, this is a common theme in Christians. You know, you think once if you're saving yourself for marriage and you're like putting that on a pedestal, you're like, that'll, that'll solve most of my problems. I'll just be able like have sex and come every day. And I won't even have to deal with lots of thoughts, but you do. Um, and the way that like,

Speaker: the the church synonymizes like thinking someone's attractive and dwelling on it for a few moments as like this like awful lustful activity is where most of these posts stem from yeah like oh you mean you're a normal person that noticed that somebody's attractive yeah fine dude you can just move on with your life it's actually okay it's you're not gonna burn in hell because you're attracted to someone you're good uh Fantasizing has always been a part of my life for good and bad.

Speaker: Good as in creating ideas and stories that I can write. Oh, is this our friend, ah Casey, our our social media friend? Oh, so like ah write erotic fiction. Oh, no. So good.

Speaker: um Bad as in lust and unachievable and unachievable kinks and fetishes. And so in marriage, I find myself still having those odd kinks that aren't possible.

Speaker: They are possible in imagination and art, however. And I discovered how easy it was to use AI programs. Oh no. My wife in fantasy settings. Which ones? Holy shit.

Speaker: ah Oh, dude, that's so bad. Just using AI to make sexual fantasies come true without an individual's consent is just peak 2026.

Speaker: um Finding online images that I like and using swapping technology, which is really ironic because I hate AI and its effect on humanity.

Speaker: But I'm still going to use it. ah Only for evil, too. yeah Only for like the the worst way it's used. I'm not making spreadsheets over here. Yeah. Jesus.

Speaker: You might immediately think I am producing really sick and nasty concepts of my wife, but I'm really not. It is more along the lines of she's on a battlefield, being a badass warrior, or dressed like a hot nurse, or a supernatural being holding the earth in her hands.

Speaker: Oh, God, I hate this guy. Yeah. this Why are you telling anyone? this guy has you Just keep your shame to yourself. Yeah. Yeah. this is by This is definitely not what he's making with that either. That's terrible, dude.

Speaker: Well, he's about to use my favorite adjective to describe a woman. I truly view view my wife as a queen, and I'd never depict or imagine her in a way where she's being taken advantage of. Okay, bondage is off the table, ah but none of this is to excuse myself.

Speaker: I still heavily trouble, it still heavily troubles me as being lust. Or at least, taking away intimacy that should be only shared between me and my wife, not just selfishly shared with me.

Speaker: The irritating thing is, I've struggled more than ever in my entire life to convince myself it is fully bad. I feel like it is wrong, but it's not so wrong.

Speaker: Or not wrong at all. i don't know. And this gives me, gives my mind to my, this gives my mind the wiggle room to really hem and ha and quantify it. Yeah. It sounds like it.

Speaker: Things like it seems it actually makes me desire my wife in real life more strongly. I was too embarrassed to show my wife or even talk about it, but she found some of these images once to my chagrin. Oh,

Speaker: Could you even imagine like finding that? so She wasn't bothered at all. i don't buy that. Yeah. I don't buy it.

Speaker: Uh, she wasn't bothered at all. She said it actually made her feel good. So I have this quote unquote evidence that it isn't necessarily bad. Obviously, though, it's having a very turbulent, conscious, convicting effect on me.

Speaker: I feel constantly guilty before God, yet a huge pull to keep doing it. These images I produce are often very sexual, but they are of my wife. I feel like he's kind of talking out both sides of his mouth now.

Speaker: He really wants somebody to tell him this is fine. Yep. Which, if your wife's fine with it, then whatever. Then you're good. Why are you talking about it? This idea that, like, your weird sexual hang-ups are somehow, like, the spirit of God, like, convicting you about, like, you know, whatever dumb little thing you're doing. Yeah, and not just your entire history.

Speaker: It's literally the same effect as, like, people, like, Christians who are, like... oh you know i yeah i watch game of thrones i got i really don't like some of the stuff they put in there though i gotta say i mean it's a little it's a little risque i don't like it but you know it's like why are you telling you're watching it so like you don't need to tell me about how offensive it is to you morally like you're still watching it so what do you just watch it who cares yeah like why do we have to do this dance because this is like the dumb thing that like hey

Speaker: about to say that the title of the the podcast. This is what the dumb thing that growing up Christian does to you, where it's like you're told that, like, these actually super normal desires and, like...

Speaker: quote unquote fetishes are these like immoral demon inside of you. And in a reality, it's like, nah, dude, you're actually just horny and that's okay. yeah Yeah. Meanwhile, this guy's just making AI to, just to make his wife look strong. And he's like, oh, I'm such a piece of shit. Aren't I?

Speaker: Meanwhile, they're like, oh, my fetishes are so evil, but instead of regular sex, I'll have butt sex. You're like, yeah, you're really missing the point on all fronts. Boy, my fetishes are so messed up. It's empowering women, which in the Bible is wrong.

Speaker: everybody wants everything. They want to do the thing that they want, that they feel a little weird about, but then they also need someone to tell them that like, it's actually good and cool that you do it. It's like, why do you have to have both? You're doing the thing. You're getting what you want. Just do it and shut up.

Speaker: Like, I don't want to hear about it. Just do the thing. You don't also get to be congratulated for being right that you do the thing. Just do it and shut up. Yeah. I don't want to publicly know about you making weird ai porn of your wife, dude.

Speaker: Yeah. This isn't a con confession. This is like ah a, you know, up you're desperately looking for someone to be like, actually, it's great and cool. And it's it's a, you know what? Honestly, I think your conviction about this just shows how serious you are about your walk with God, but you're a okay brother. So keep doing the thing you were going to do anyways. Yeah. Well, he addresses that specifically. So I'm glad you brought it up. ka Oh, hell yeah. Yeah.

Speaker: they're not These images I produce are often very sexual, but they are of my wife. They are meant to entice, but they are also wholesome. So they're very sexual, but wholesome.

Speaker: ah i but if i go If I go on any longer, it will sound more and more like I'm just trying to convince myself. I just don't know what to do.

Speaker: I want to stop, but I really don't want to stop. That's why he loves it so much. Yeah. Christianity making certain things taboo makes it so much hornier.

Speaker: I was wrong. He's not the he's not doing what I said he's doing. What he's doing is hoping that someone messages him and says, well, can I see some of these? Yeah. yeah That's what he wants. That's what he really gets. he suddenly He's desperately hoping that somebody messages him so he can show them the the weird pictures he made of his wife. And I bet they look nothing like his wife.

Speaker: Yeah. It's like that like eighty s comic book art. Yeah. Like, you know, like quadruple F boobs. And, you know, was that what was that? ah It's like heavy metal, that cartoon or whatever.

Speaker: Yeah. yeah it there Not a lot of interesting comments. People kind of just being like, well, ah you know, keep taking this to prayer, blah, blah, blah. Just like real neutral.

Speaker: Oh, so boring. But one goes, I'll be honest, if this were my hubby and I found this out, I would be very, very upset and concerned because now those pictures are out there.

Speaker: Images, not just in your head anymore. Ugh. Don't it like this. As a sister in Christ, because you asked, I would def say you should go seek some wise counseling. Yeah, dude. Seek Jesus, this and that that. One of the actual, like, legit reactions was um was ah basically, like, one person just being like, there i the concern i have two concerns the first is privacy related i don't love uploading personal images to ai especially so if uh your source material was all at all risque and that is a thing like i uploading personal images to ai without someone's consent is actually fucking nuts i know it's probably not considered like i think a lot of people i would have a problem with it but

Speaker: You know, there's no laws. Yeah. um I don't i don't know. I know you can't. I know some states are making it illegal to just like make A.I. porn of people as they should. Yeah. But it's like who's enforcing that?

Speaker: and I don't know how. Yeah. like Yeah. And the people who are doing it usually have a good way around it, but whatever. I mean, at least they exist. Then you can hold people accountable for maybe other aspects of it, like redistribution sharing. You can try to like hold it off. But um a lot of people get way too serious about this ah in a way that wasn't entertaining in the comments. Usually the comments have it like people are like something more fun people are actively praying for the guy. Yeah.

Speaker: It's ah one goes which is really ironic because I hate AI and it's affected on humanity. That's what this person is responding to. There is no have it both ways. You are actively using AI and now your wife's face and maybe body attributes are floating around there building the database.

Speaker: Yeah. Which another lustful person may use. Yeah, it's pretty fucked. an An acre of of coral reef was just bleached so that you could turn your wife into like a cleavage-wielding Viking. Yeah.

Speaker: I've always wanted to fuck Joan of Arc. I actually really hate AI, but I do enjoy like ah the the Viking Chud songs. you know Dude, they're so funny.

Speaker: i I hate AI, but I enjoy the most like egregious, base-level, simple-minded forms of it. Yeah. i It's so frustrating. i have I have a deep disdain for it and like what it's doing to society.

Speaker: ah just ah all every ram data centers, all all the ramifications of it. But every now and then I will see an image and I'm like, fuck, that is really funny. Like when you see Trump kissing Netanyahu. Yeah. yeah sure like that I saw I saw like ah a reel a couple of days ago where it was like ah this guy like watches. He's like Graham. He's like granddad's like losing his mind or whatever. And he he watched his like granddad's like favorite movie is like, I don't know, like some movie with like Ryan Gosling on the rock. I don't know what movie that is, but it exists out there.

Speaker: And he was like, I added in this A.I. scene into the movie to see if my granddad notices. And it's just it's the rock or not Ryan Gosling, Ryan Reynolds. It's the rock and Ryan Reynolds making out.

Speaker: And it doesn't even like fit into the movie. It's just like a cut scene. and He's like watching this granddad and his granddad just goes, what the fuck? ah Yeah, shit like that is funny. I mean, yeah can't work around that. It's around. It's going to, you know, people are going to use it. It's just like that. the I feel like actually like the data center thing is proof that we could do something politically if we really had the will to because yeah they're trying to build a bunch of those data centers here and people are like losing their minds over it Yeah.

Speaker: And it's great. and I think it might actually start to form some form of like class consciousness among people because it's like, okay, guys, we all hate data centers. Who owns the data centers? Yeah.

Speaker: What are they for? Dude, what for? What are they for? Like, I don't understand. Like, are we building these? Yeah, I mean, that's the thing is like – They're like, we have to build 60 data centers across Kansas over the next like three years. And it's like, so what? So we can make Excel spreadsheets? Like, look, clearly that's not what any of this is for. What is it for? What are going to do with it? Our Palantir files are full of a lot of stuff, guys.

Speaker: but They need the space, lot of storage for every – it's a lot – you do need a lot of data centers when you're trying to store private information on every single American. I do think – that's my schizo-conspiracy brain. is it's like mo It's like Flock,

Speaker: palant oracle like all these companies are like investing more and more in and it's like okay well like five years ago they didn't need this like what changed like i thought we were actually getting better with like truncating storage and everything and it's like yeah but you don't know how much we know about you now yeah so they've they've mined a lot of data over the past five years at some point what is there to know you know because i mean like You know, eventually, can't they just fabricate whatever they need? Yeah, dude, with AI. Yeah. I mean, it doesn't seem like the ah the actual information is going to be really all that important when they can just be like, you know, well, you know, his phone or his phone was full of child porn, see? Yeah. Some of it feels like the cruelty is the point.

Speaker: like yeah yeah just like control like almost yeah there's a fantastic show i think it's on peacock which is unfortunate because it's not doesn't get not many people have that yeah hbo and apple and are you gonna talk about how much you love land man again i can't around that It's called The Capture, and it's all about how, like, intelligence agencies use deepfake technology to, like, to, i like, frame people for terrorism, potential terrorism. Oh, yeah. Or fabricate evidence. Show is fucking amazing.

Speaker: i'll at this I think there's three seasons of it. Each one, I just so got sucked in, saved up to, like, fucking three. I'm watching it. Yeah, Ron Perlman. Yeah, he's he's like a CIA guy in it, I think.

Speaker: Dude, though every every aspect of it is wildly believable. um And the way that they kind of progress the story and try to find ways to address it. Dude, it's so it's it's it's just so relevant. Phenomenal show. Everyone should watch it.

Speaker: ah I don't even get paid for that. Do you think that this is how we finally like pacify boomers? Like this is how we kind of usher them out as a, uh, as a demographic is like, if we're going to have AI, could we just like have a matrix style system where like AI Taylor Sheridan just reads boomers lullabies about whatever industry they were in like their whole life? Yeah.

Speaker: Oh, I was a mid-level exec at Colgate, and you make that into a Taylor Sheridan show, and your grandpa can just plug into it until he's dead. Toothpaste man. they need ah they need a They need syndicated show about a guy who worked in a factory, pulled a lever 60 hours a week at a machine shop while the wife stayed home and raised six kids. And they owned a house, had a camper, went on a vacation once a year. And that also tells them that it no one else deserves that because they also because they work entry-level jobs. Dude, the crazy thing is I've actually been watching...

Speaker: A lot of like older media. ah It started with like I would put on the Magic School Bus or like Zubumufu on for Steve when I would leave the house. Oh, the Magic School Bus. I love the episode where Miss Frizzle takes the kids into like the salmon stream and they get nutted on by bunch of things. Absolutely. unloaded onto it's crazy and she's like it's crazy kids and they're like yeah what's this she's like telling him because they're eggs they're salmon eggs and they get just it's like's like scene after scene of cartoon salmon blowing their entire load on these things it's phenomenal aquatic skrogurt

Speaker: yeah Yeah, I love that's one my favorite bands. It's crazy. It's crazy. Like last week, Casey and I were talking sperm whales came up and I looked up why they were called sperm whales. And it's because they like emit this goo that that sailors thought thought was sperm. And i was like, I didn't actually know. it I thought it would be like something like unrelated. And then we have salmon over here not being called sperm fish. And I think that's fucked up. They literally have like a 3,000 gallon like water balloon umdru of liquid cookie butter. 3,000 gallon cum drum in their forehead. Cum drum is crazy, dude.

Speaker: Oh my God.

Speaker: I knew I should have been a marine biologist. But like, I don't think we're like talking enough about the the Republican or i don't know what the word is, but like the conservatization of media right now, like all the shows coming out now are like Landman, Dutton Ranch, Yellowstone, like and it's just like yeah it's it's stuff for like boomer dads because like those are the only dudes watching TV.

Speaker: I heard there's already plans to make a movie based on that fake hell that fake plane crash in Iran or something. What was the fake plane crash that they made yeah, the rescue mission deal. Yeah. What? The Trump made up. There's like that. The Trump made up. Oh, yeah.

Speaker: That clearly didn't happen. And there I heard that there's already talks about making movie. you And I was like, oh, cool. Black Hawk Down 2. Yeah. Just shitty fucking. White Hawk Down. It's just shitty Black Hawk Down. Yeah.

Speaker: Whirlybirds, a Taylor Sheridan miniseries. yeah Starring Chris Pratt and Chris Pratt. It's like the clumps, but every character is Chris Pratt. That's so funny, actually.

Speaker: i might I might have to write that down. That is too good. Holy shit. the The liberal professor, and it's just it's just Chris Pratt pretending to be what every conservative thinks college professors are. The liberal professor.

Speaker: two

Speaker: It is so annoying. Like I keep like every once a week, somebody recommends a Taylor Sheridan show to me. And I'm like, I'm not watching. I'm not watching. They're like, dude, Billy Bob Thornton has this great monologue and land man where he talks about how stupid windmills are. and I'm like, I don't i don't care. Don't you hate Hollywood? You hate Hollywood.

Speaker: Why are you telling me about this? I just hate that I have know who Taylor Sheridan is. like He's the guy that wrote... ah He's wrote some good stuff, but not lately. It's like Tulsa King Yellowstone. Yeah, he wrote Wind River. like Yeah, Wind River. Which is a pretty sick shootout scene, but yeah. It shows you what their allegiances are because they're like, hey, I hate Hollywood and the elite pedophile rapist class that eat that drinks baby blood. And I'm in it.

Speaker: And they're like, but I do love it when they tell me that windmills are stupid. yeah Yeah. So I keep hearing relatives keep telling me about how great Landman is. Yeah. But there's always a caveat. There's the the Christian sort of conservative caveat. What don't they like?

Speaker: His daughter is apparently like lesbian. lesbian. well being lib whore. ah And that's always like what they tell you, like his daughter's really gross in it. She's always like saying dirty sex stuff.

Speaker: That means they want to fuck her. Yeah, that's 100% what that means. According to Pentagon theory, they all want to fuck her. Jesus. Yeah. I know you have a a hard out time. Oh, yeah. we got this we We teased a story at the top, so I want to make sure we have room for that. We got 27 minutes. We're still doing all right. 27. I don't know how long your story is, man.

Speaker: I don't think i would. I mean, we whatever. We can start and shoot the shit. um Okay. So I was driving through. actually to look up. I love what Casey was like. I know exactly where this is. or It's called Around the Bin Steakhouse. Let me look up where this is. It's somewhere...

Speaker: I've eaten there. It's near Lincoln, right? Yeah, it's like right out. It's like in between Lincoln and Omaha. Dude, the fucking. yeah can i I can't share my screen on here or can I?

Speaker: No, you can't. Unfortunately, I'll take a photo and show you guys because the the Google listing for this house or for the house, lol, for this restaurant is this guy's picture in a pink tutu. Honestly, if you're conservative, he's probably ah a super fun guy.

Speaker: Wait, are you look like you held it up. Were you showing us? No, I was taking a picture to show you guys. Oh, yeah. He seems fun. Oh, he looks cool. He looks cool. And he loves testicles. But he has He looks like he plays pool.

Speaker: So I'm to to set living to set the stage. I am What day am I? This is early on in my tour, I think. cause Yeah, I bombed it from Denver to Chicago.

Speaker: which i do not recommend um i don't know how many shows that is but even like back if even back-to-back bombs would be like should i just quit and kill myself yeah i did i did it i so i started my tour i did ah i did a show at uh uh comedy works in downtown denver which is i think one of the best clubs in america like it's so good um And then I had a day off.

Speaker: So I was like, okay, I'm going to go to, ah I'm going to go up to Chicago because I've got some shows in Chicago and I've got some friends up there. And i I don't, I'm not making a lot of money on this tour. So I'm like, I'm like, you know what? We're going to drive straight. Cause I think it was like 15 hours. And I was like, I can do that. I can take an Adderall and bomb it.

Speaker: You know, that's it's that that's some Casey shit. I don't have that in me. 15 hour drive by yourself. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, it is. It is exactly in the at the midpoint, which is where I saw this ah this ah billboard.

Speaker: And the billboard read testicle festival. And then the crazy part is, so that's already like jarring enough. Cause I'm like, what the fuck is this? The, the art is this AI jacked bald Eagle, but I don't know if you guys with huge, with huge, with huge, unfeathered nuts.

Speaker: I love when we post this episode. I'll send me send me yeah pictures of it some of this shit and I'll just put on the slide because so I'm like I'm also so like and to set the stage even more. I slept in like a motel six the night before. So I did not sleep that well because it was like my like it was just I was worried that all my shit was going to get broken into and stolen. And so I'm like I'm like I think this is yeah eight hours into it. I'm just I'm tired and I see this festival and I'm like what the fuck is this.

Speaker: So I see Round the Bend Steakhouse. and i was like, ah in my head, I'm like, oh, maybe this is something that like is for like ah prostate cancer or like something to raise money for yeah for like for that. It's not.

Speaker: um It's just this guy, I guess, in case you may know more about this because it's like kind of in your somewhat area. But like it's just a barbecue festival where people just cook bull testicles in different ways.

Speaker: Yeah, I think that's the extent of it. Oh, my God. But the crazy part is, so I looked it up. I saw that guy who I showed you. This is the picture that he has on his website. Never trust anyone who shapes their beard up like that. No, not at all. Like that is. It's um for the listening. It's a. um He's a he looks like a human shoehorn.

Speaker: Yeah, it's the modern day clan hood. yeah It goes down the sideburns. And instead of like rounding out to the mustache and forming into a goatee sort of thing, it it goes straight down. It's almost chin strappy. And then it just goes straight to like below his lip.

Speaker: but its And then it goes down like a ZZ top, but it's all squared up. And I know that beard because I used to rock that beard when I was, I mean, i still am overweight, when i was more overweight, because when you're fat, your hair won't grow on your cheeks like that.

Speaker: Cause they're too, they're too thick. They're they're too low. a little He's also, he's also a little extremely bald. So like he's, he's overcompensating. So anyway, um I went to, ah I went to the website.

Speaker: It's like, you know, they've, you know, Hey, you know what, for all intents and purposes, they seem like they're doing a good time. They got a 4.6 on Google with over 3000 reviews. That's pretty good. I'm sure, honestly, I bet the food rips. You weren't able to swing by? i can tell you it does not. Both hospitals are not good. No, no, but they do other they do other stuff. but My guess would be like middle of nowhere, Nebraska. Like you probably got to do your meat right at least, right?

Speaker: Casey, you said you've been there. I've been there. I didn't go during the test. Somebody took me there. Okay. Like it was a, like it was an attraction that we had to see. Yeah. It was like during, it wasn't during the testicle festival. So it feels like it was probably like going to a strip club on like a Tuesday at lunch.

Speaker: Yeah. I want to know how long you have to slow cook a testicle for them to melt in your mouth. I mean, their their wet their website has like, ah you know, again, they look like nice people. They're sitting on the back of a truck. They've got their daughter in between them. They've got a nice little write up around the bin. Steakhouse isn't just Nebraska's premier steakhouse. It's a destination. And they they go on about how they bought it. But then it it says built on faith, family and a firm handshake.

Speaker: Oh, man. Whatever. pain Just go ahead and say you're Republican. Like it's, you know, yeah yeah let's it's fine. It's not even a dog whistle at that point because everyone can hear it. But they literally have a tab ever on their website.

Speaker: Dude. Oh, my God. They've added more to it. This is the I have to take another picture of this. This wasn't here when I looked first. They have a mascot, which is and and a person in an inflatable bull costume with giant inflatable balls.

Speaker: Oh, my goodness. It's like a noir bull. I love comedy. And that's the thing is like this is so funny, and I don't think they know that because here's because here's the write-up that I'm going read to you guys right now. Let me make sure the one on the website is the same one that I took a screenshot of a few months ago because it is a whirlwind. Yeah, it is. Okay.

Speaker: Okay. here So this is the write-up. This is how – and anyone can read this. Children do. You have to be 18 or older to enter the website. Our testicle festival goes down every year on the Saturday of Father's Day weekend. So I read that and you're like, okay. Again, I'm thinking this has got be for like some sort of prostate cancer like fundraising. Yeah, Uniball Dad. No.

Speaker: ah no So our testicle festival goes on every year on the Saturday of Father's Day weekend because nothing says thanks, dad, like cold beer, live music, and a sack of beef fries.

Speaker: Sure. Okay. A sack of beef fries? Beef fries. didn't even know that was possibility. That's another for it. Yeah. Okay. And then it says, never been. Here's what you're walking into.

Speaker: People elbow to elbow in the ballroom. So not the ballroom, the ball space room. And then and then in case, which they have a cool ball pit that's just full of bowl testicles for children to play in. Here's my favorite part. Let's be honest. They know that the people looking at this website probably don't have good reading comprehension. So it says people elbow to elbow in the ballroom. And then in parentheses, it says two words for a reason.

Speaker: Oh my God. Whoever wrote this, they probably made them the mayor of the town. yeah So people elbow to elbow in the ballroom, knocking back ice cold beers, splitting buckets of voodoo juice.

Speaker: All this so far sounds actually like a pretty good time. Um, And then here's where it gets crazy. And this is how I know they're conservative because they don't know what this phrase I'm about to say means. So I'll start at the top again. People elbow to elbow in the ballroom. Two words for a reason.

Speaker: Knocking back ice cold beers, splitting buckets of voodoo juice, and bravely popping their first nut like it's a rite of passage. Brother, I don't think you know what that phrase means.

Speaker: and then I think in i think in that that sect, I think that just refers to popping your first nut with an underage person. Something, dude. It's crazy. I bet the Grindr servers are overloaded at this event.

Speaker: And then they just kind of they kind of double down. the Did Lindsey Graham go there before he died? for sure. let me see if there's a picture of on the website. There's not. I will say the photos that they have of the website looks like they could also be an ad for type two diabetes.

Speaker: No one, no one's looking like they could run a quarter mile. And ah sorry if that's body shaming. um Okay. One big Olympic ad. Then they keep going. The band's cranked.

Speaker: Huh? ah Okay. Again, phrasing. The band's cranked, the shirts are flying off the merch table, and strangers are becoming lifelong friends somewhere between their second drink and their third nut.

Speaker: Dude.

Speaker: It's so great. So it's just the cum festival. It's just so, it's yeah, it's just so shameful. And then, and then, no, this is like, this is, this is some Buster Bluth shit. It's, it's, it's, it's very like accidentally gay. And then if just to really drive it home, because maybe the entire time you're like, Hey man, these guys just having fun. It goes outside the beer garden is stacked with spools, sunsets, a few, Oh, and a few stories you probably won't repeat in church the next morning. Okay. Well that just makes it kind of scary. Like what?

Speaker: hey There's room for everyone, whether you came for the music, the meat, or just to see what kind of madness rural Nebraska can legally pull off. god Oh, my word, dude.

Speaker: Are you saying it's barely legal? see waters just running around this place like Pac-Man. just much munch munch It's crazy. it It literally just happened a month ago. Yeah, it was on June 20th. ah Honestly, i bet it's ah I bet it's a damn good time.

Speaker: I bet I would be miserable there the in entire time. I can't even expect people watching. Yeah, I bet Casey and I could code switch well enough to have a good time there. but Oh, my God. You guys would crush. Yeah. You guys would crush and come back. like i i wouldn't know how to handle it. I would short circuit and just kind of like twitch and my brain would fry. You guys would get all in and then come back with some good stories.

Speaker: Dude, i I can't believe they have they they have a tab on their website called The Ballroom, and it's Ball Space Room. That's so funny. What do they do there? ah Well, looking at the... They have their Google Calendar link to it.

Speaker: Let's see. On ah on Thursday the 23rd 5 p.m., it's just marked busy. Doesn't tell you what. Honestly, the calendar looks like my calendar when I work remote. everything They forgot they linked it to their Google calendar. Everything's just marked busy.

Speaker: like Every day. Like, oh, sorry, I can't join that meeting. I'm ah i'm super busy. It's funny, like, ah you know, because I work with car dealerships. yeah And some of them, it's hilarious, like the small ones, sometimes you look at their websites and like the the the car manufacturers have like all these standards about how their building needs to look and all this kind of stuff. And a lot of times they have like website templates and everything that they can loosely follow. But like some of them...

Speaker: they just do such a poor job of making it look professional. Yeah. There's a store in Wichita that I was looking at their website, trying to figure out who to talk to in there and stuff. And like, there's like three people listed on the, uh, like our team page or whatever, you know, one of them is a lady who's like the, the, the office manager, whatever. And her picture on the website is a bathroom selfie. Yeah. I'm looking it. I'm just like, i can't. Why would you put, why would you put this on here? Dude? I love that.

Speaker: Oh, I love that so much.

Speaker: Yeah. This, uh, this is like very, uh, uh, truck stop comedy routine coded. It's like, uh, yeah. It's like here at the truck stops. They'll sell hats that have like a pheasant on it. And it'll be like, Kansas home of the big cocks.

Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. Or a lot of that. i but When I go down to the Outer Banks, I always pass at like the that the Dirty Dick's restaurants. Like, well, there's a, I got my crabs at Dirty Dick's. There's a place in my God. There's a place, uh, down at the Outer Banks just called biscuits and porn.

Speaker: Oh, and it's like, but it's like not that I can actually look that up. Cause it's like such a funny, I used to have ah a sweatshirt. Yeah. Let's see. Biscuits.

Speaker: Dude, the Heart Attack Grill closed down in Las Vegas, apparently. Oh, man. Yeah, it's in Nags Head. Biscuits and porn. I think they might actually sell porn, now that I think of it. That's shocking. How soul-sucking would it be to work at Dick's Last Resort? just Oh, my God. Have you guys been to one? Las Vegas?

Speaker: I've been in one. i didn't do I didn't go through the whole, like, ah roast routine. yeah Clearly the staff was over it. you know you want to If you want to be a roast comic, you if you don't have Dick's Last Resort on your resume, you can't get hired anywhere.

Speaker: Dude, it's it's literally just like you're eating at a Kill Tony's episode. i was got it i was And that is my nightmare. I was going to go for the same joke. That's so funny. it's When I went, I went once.

Speaker: I was probably 18. i don't remember much of it. They would tie helium balloons to girls' hair. Yeah. stand up And they would write things like easy on it. yeah it was like so yeah it was like ah Yeah. It was like stuff you could get away with, like putting on like a child. because i remember, yeah, I went one time when I was like 14 and it was like hides is porn or something like that. Yeah.

Speaker: And it's like they act indifferent. They're like, all right, what do you want? And you're like, ah, this is so great. I love paying for bad service. Yeah. And now Gen Z just gives it to you for free. so yeah ah But then after like nine or ten, they would like it would be like Dick's last resort after dark. Yeah.

Speaker: It would be like way more gross and silly. We're to get jalapeno poppers at Dick's. the way The way that that would work is if like your entire weights, if you just specifically hired like a bunch of black teenagers as your waitstaff. Yeah. Just people leaving in tears. Like if we're going to be, yeah let's go for it, dude.

Speaker: That's so funny. When I lived in Boston. Dive in. When I lived in Boston for that year, because I was wanting to be part of the church plant that my youth pastor started, I was turned out to be, ah i was looking at it with some rose-colored glasses prior to getting there. Yeah.

Speaker: But the reason i my foster son is my foster son is because of living in Boston. So, you know, I got nothing to complain about, um except for him. He's really annoying. No. um i but So, like, yeah, great things came of it, right? But when I was there, um he was one of the worst. I met him when he was nine. He's now 23. Yeah.

Speaker: um He was a nightmare. He was a nightmare of a any any nine year old. is and He was just he would just tear everything up. But as I, you know, start like hanging out with him and, you know, I mean, some of my friends would like take him and some other kids out to do shit. Be like, oh, skiing. We would just kind of come on. We're going to go drink.

Speaker: Yeah, we would find cool shit to do. You truly never, ever get lambasted like you do hanging out with a bunch of like 9, 10, 11-year-old black kids. They'll kill riing you. apart They show no mercy. Yeah, dude. My nephew is, he'll be 12, I think, this September.

Speaker: he'll be 12 or 13. And like I went to his 10th birthday party when I was still living back home. And the entire time I was like, i just need these kids to not notice me. yeah Cause I don't, i don't want to have a bunch of 10 year olds like doing Fortnite dances and calling me chopped. Like I'm, yeah.

Speaker: was like, I do that enough to myself. Like, uh, it's so funny. Let those guys open the RNC. Yeah. Can't wait for them to join the army. ah unwillingly and get a testosterone shot from hagseth yeah dude he's checking boners for free guys dude he is he flicks them if you don't pass the five flick test you need a testosterone shot couldn't that that was honestly a such a funny news day because i was like does he like do they not see how gay this is

Speaker: Did you see... Okay, we were talking about it when you when you came into the room, but um every video I see of Pete Hegseth working out is just like a little more embarrassing. Yeah, dude.

Speaker: The first one I saw, I was actually like, okay, like nice. he's He's kind of getting some weight up there. Everyone I've seen since, I'm like, are you good, dude? Yeah, I saw two today. where like one where he had... like individual dumbbells he was trying to lift them up and he had them like way back on his wrists and he was he was kind of doing the thing where his back is really arched and he's clearly like not gonna get it up so he's and then he was doing some sort of like a uh a shuffle like a sideways shuffle drill with a bunch of soldiers he was doing uh we would call them karaoke's but yeah where you like you like rotate your hips and like pick your leg up

Speaker: Dude, there is, I mean, he looks like freaking Gumby out there. Yeah, man. He's he's knees and elbows just all over the place. and he's just like Nazi George Soros. God, dude. Did you see the thing of him? Did you see that one, Casey? Spencer, I think you sent it to us. It's George Soros being like, went out for a day to train with some military people and was like, oh, I didn't realize how hard their jobs were. Like, Yeah, it's took a lot out of me. It's um it's really embarrassing of George Soros trying to just do like some sort of like five mile hike in the woods. you talking about this right person? George Soros is like the old vampire billionaire.

Speaker: No, not George Soros. Santos. Oh, yeah. tri was fun Dude, it was from that ah that that Navy SEAL show on Fox. Yeah.

Speaker: Yeah. They like, why is he showing up places? he Because he's a fraud. don't think he knows he's a fraud anymore. I think he's just like, and I think he thinks he's such an every man that he can literally be every man. Dude, I hired him for a cameo the day he was going to prison.

Speaker: this is His cameos used to be like 500 bucks. And then I saw on like Reddit or something where it was like, hey, George Soros, ah his cameos are five bucks now because he's going to prison tomorrow. Four soups.

Speaker: and So i got I got him to wish my friend a happy birthday. Put a little cash in the commissary. Let me see if I can find it, dude. It's so funny. Is he like fourth Mike on Tim Pool's show now? Like, is he a regular on there?

Speaker: Is that a play on fourth Reich? heyo Might as well be. All right, last, yeah, it was like last November? i I think he might be like a regular part of like Tim Pool's show now.

Speaker: That's crazy. The beanie wearing motherfucker. Yeah. i It's hard to be more of an embarrassment than like a public embarrassment than Tim Pool. Like Santos gives him a run for his money.

Speaker: Well, it's also funny because it like came out that Tim Pool was like bought and paid for by Russia and he's still like out here trying to like convince people. Yeah. It got caught in that influencer campaign deal.

Speaker: No, he's such a fraud. i mean, oh, yeah. ah You know, there was like people who did that like with Ben Shapiro back in the day. They were like, well, you know, he's just like he's very literate and well-spoken. And, you know, he's like a principled guy. He can he can kind of pick his way legally through things or whatever. What is the argument for Tim Pool?

Speaker: Like, he's such a nothing character. i don't even know. And he's he's. Damn, I can't find it. I don't know if this is safe to say, but I feel like Ben Shapiro is at the very least consistent.

Speaker: Consistently awful, but consistent. Used to be. Tim Pool is very much like all over the place. Yeah. not Not a shred of consistency in his ethics. I can't find the actual video, but that's the...

Speaker: Got a nice screenshot of Him on Maton Evans' podcast was like the funniest thing I've seen in a long time. Truly insane. And what's his deal right now? Where is he? What's he doing? George Santos? Yeah. I think he's doing reality TV for money.

Speaker: Yeah. He's got, yeah. he's How do you get out of jail? Was he pardoned? Yeah, Trump pardoned him. That's so funny. He cheated a whole bunch of people out of their retirements and stuff like that. Trump was like, I do that every day. Nothing wrong with it. Yeah. Do we actually do? It's like, he's one of the least egregious of the people that Trump pardoned. So there's that, but at least he's silly. At least he's a little silly. Yeah. That's nice to see. He's usually they're just absolute, like just depraved rapey lunatics. He's a fun gay.

Speaker: santos is silly let him have it yeah he is kind of like one he's a he's a more fun con man than most the ones that we have yeah it was nice it kind of felt like we shouldn't have fell for it it was so obvious you know yeah like it felt like you're like all right we're gonna give you a pass because that's a little bit on us yeah about the third time he was like inserted himself into a world event he's like yeah i was on united 93 but You were on United at 93 and in Dachau? That's crazy, man. We had no idea. Wow. I was in air traffic control the day the Challenger exploded, and you're like, these this is a lot of stories. How old are He transcends time.

Speaker: but He's just Doctor Who the whole time. That's crazy. Oh, man. Oh, my goodness. Dude, always so much fun to have you, man. Thanks for coming.

Speaker: Sorry I couldn't stay on for two. I got to go make a name for myself. Yeah, you do that. You're doing great, man. ah Honestly, congratulations on, I mean, booking your first tour. Thanks, man. Playing Largo. I mean, you've got some you've got some great shit going on, man. Yeah, I just got hit up today. i got Whatever, I'm going to say it. Who cares? ah I guess there's a festival called the All Things Go Festival, which I have, i've if they're listening, I've definitely heard of it, and I'm a huge fan. But between you guys, between you and me,

Speaker: I'm a little disappointed. I really was expecting that the testicle festival was having a comedy lineup in the ballroom. God, I wish, but for some reason, my computer's been really slow, but yeah, these, they reached out. It's called all things go festival. It's in like DC and New York, but, uh, they like, they're like the, this girl who follows me, she's like, Oh, I'm doing all the booking for it. Uh, we'd love to have you like do comedy and be like a creator at the festival. and I was like, i don't know what that means, but sure. Yeah. I mean, yeah. i was like, you guys, you guys, waiting ah When is it? it's like so if they I wish their website would load, but it looks like it's September 25th through 27th. I'll be there.

Speaker: Doing what? I don't know yet. I've yet to talk to them on the phone. but Are you going be in both D.C. and New York? That's a great question that I hope that they answer. because All right. Because there's there's two different lineups, and the D.C. lineup is way cooler than the New York lineup, I'm be honest with you.

Speaker: Is it New York City? or Yeah, it's in Forest Hills Stadium, which I think is out in Queens. Maybe. Which one had the better lineup? The DC one has a way better lineup, my opinion.

Speaker: I mean, the the New York one has like Brandi Carlile, who I – well, also DC has Brandi Carlile too. But DC has like Hayley Williams and ah Ethel Kane, Magdalena Bay, who are like some – Whoa, it's not just comedy.

Speaker: No, no. it's like ah It's like a music festival that they asked me to do comedy at, which is never a good idea. But – oh my god i man that's that would be that's sick yeah because i did i will say it appearance i did where my car blew up i did i did a music festival in uh boise idaho and it was so much fun dude yeah so yeah the shows are like whatever but just being able to like be at a music festival for free and then like oh i'm gonna go do this show real quick and they're like oh you're an artist you're like no i'm a comedian yeah

Speaker: yeah But yeah, that's all that's all I got right now. Other than that, just local local shows in the in the Los Angeles area. um I'm going to try to record a special at the end of this year because all my friends are telling me that I need to record a special and put it on YouTube. So yeah I got to do it it. It works for a lot of people. Yeah. so it's It's a good way to go.

Speaker: I don't know where. I don't know when, but it'll probably happen in December. Hell yeah, man. Yeah. hey Yeah, guys. Thanks for having me. Love you as always. Happy to do this again whenever you want to. Absolutely, man. Well, ah right yeah. Thanks, everybody, for listening, and we will see you next time. he Peace.