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Episode 41 - What is ADHD Tax And Should You Pay It?
71 Plays1 year ago
Paul and Martin (co-Mayors of ADHDville) chat about ADHD Tax. And along the way Martin talks about the time he got arrested and Paul gets all medieval on us.
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Put quill to paper and send us an email at: ADHDville@gmail.com
ADHD/Focus music from Martin (AKA Thinking Fish)
Theme music was written by Freddie Philips and played by Martin West. All other music by Martin West.
Please remember: This is an entertainment podcast about ADHD and does not substitute for individualized advice from qualified health professionals.
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Transcript
Introduction to ADHD Tax
00:00:00
Speaker
We're back in the room back in the room back in the room. I know and this week we are talking about ADHD tax and should you pay it and the and the and the and the should you pay it part is the kind of is the is the is the interesting part for me. Yeah, because I know that the that there's a lot of stuff on TikTok about what is ADHD tax and and yeah, we'll we'll get we'll get into that. We can like alone like wrestle it in a little pit of a little like mud, muddy kind of pit.
00:00:40
Speaker
Yeah, we are going to wrestle, wrestle it out um in 80s mud wrestling style. And we can wiggly yeah add some add some layers to to this, which size people don't normally talk about.
Meet the Hosts: Paul & Mike
00:00:56
Speaker
So without further ado, welcome to ADHDvel. Yes.
00:01:22
Speaker
Every Tuesday, yes. Come here, though. Every Tuesday. Come here, though. Come here, then. Get the flesh. Or if you're a vegetarian, garbanzo beans, maybe. Yeah. Or eat insects, which apparently is the next big thing. Oh, yeah. Hello, by the way. Hello. Hello. I'm Paul Thompson. Yes, I am. And I was diagnosed uh with hd some months ago now jesus really some months ago yeah well that's why we're doing a podcast why we're doing a podcast the pen is just dropped yeah just dropped you should have like the ticker at the bottom of the uh of the screen there a little ticker
00:02:10
Speaker
Yeah, breaking news, breaking news, breaking news, Paula Martin on neurodivergence. Oh, man. Yeah. I should just have that ticket just permanently on a t-shirt. So everyone knows by the way, my West knows. Yes. I'm Mike West. I was diagnosed with ADHD in 2013 or so years ago, man, I was just a boy, just a boy. And here's my segment which I'm not going to milk. I milked this segment a couple of weeks ago. You did. I'm going to strip it down to its bare knuckles. ah Okay. You milked it like some others. ah Exactly.
Entertainment Disclaimer
00:02:54
Speaker
So which is two mates who by coincidence or not after 39 years of wrestling in the mud of friendship discovered that we're CodyHTS. It's really important to say, and I mean really important to say, this is an entertainment podcast. Entertainment? Entertainment? started to sound like about Bruce Forsyth. Do I love? Do I love you?
00:03:23
Speaker
Okay, nothing from here. Not in this game. I've got scores on scores. How about ADHD? And it's not substitute. No, no, no. For individualized advice from qualified professionals. No. Don't take any advice from us. Oh, for God's sake, no. Jesus Christ, no. We're just here. No, don't do that. That would be messy. We're just here as a kind of all-inclusive ink. um back to the mic. We're just here as a kind of all-inclusive ADHD part bench with room for everyone including your doppelgangers, your alter egos, your buddy do plays, your chaperones or your best buddies. Still here, great.
00:04:02
Speaker
grab your jet packs, pedalos, space hoppers or any other transport transportation methods and let us take you to a DHDVille. Name of the podcast. co and then invite together yeah totally It's an imaginary town, Martin, that we've created in our minds. Indeed, our minds. Different parts of ADHD. Is that what we're doing? hey yeah what i said well well What is ADHD? Nine months now, shouldn't be a surprise. I have no idea what this is.
Welcome to ADHDVille
00:04:41
Speaker
And we start off as always here in the Town Hall in the Mayor's Office where we the joint Mayors of ADHDville take care of business. And hi comes sir yeah, let me just get the same agenda that I had last last week. There we go. Oh, OK. Well, we are talking about we are talking about oh something that is very much um
00:05:07
Speaker
close to home for us as joint mayors who who who who have to do the the annual budgets for ADHD. It's a town, there is there you know ah and and and when we have to like take care of the money and the and the taxes. yeah You know, that's very much what we do day in, day out. So we are looking at ADHD tax. And should you pay it? Should you pay it? It's not like the medieval form. like Well, ADHD, we could, if we get short on money, we do it like like like they did in the medieval period, you know, set up a table.
00:05:52
Speaker
and yeah the town in the town hall, in the town square, yeah and they've got new taxes to pay. Yeah. Yeah. No, yeah no, no. we There's us every year. There's a big table. There's all the citizens of ADHD lineup. And we do sometimes have ah have a have a big burly guy by with ah holding ah how holding a sword. Yeah, you know, that's all acts just depending on availability. Yeah. Yeah. We have have to hire these things out, you know, because we don't pay our our guards people enough to kind of own anything. yeah They just rent it out for special occasions, you know, like, yeah. Yeah. So yeah if a best if I've got a rabbit spare that I've just, you know, I hunted that morning, I give him a rabbit.
00:06:44
Speaker
All right. Well, that's very nice of you. yeah i was I was just going to say that if trouble breaks out anywhere in ADHDville, our armed guards have to go to the to the to the renter arms place just to rent all the axes and the swords and the stuff that they need. and It takes a bit of time to kind of. you know but Yeah. That's what it's like here in ADHD sometimes. Yeah. That's the cut of our gym at times. That is the cup of our gym. All right. So where are we going? Where should we go to talk about ADHD?
What is ADHD Tax?
00:07:21
Speaker
I think did we so didn't we say we're going to go to the police station. We're going to go to the Popo place police. Yeah, because ah yeah, because like ADHD is criminal.
00:07:36
Speaker
well yeah it is you know and you and yeah and you often get fines and stuff and it's a you know so yeah so it feels like a place of penalty so um so i want to spend time in jail did you know that all right i've spent one night Have you? Yeah. Have you now one night? What in a police cell that is? Yeah, me too. In a police cell. did you one night what what did you What did you get up to? Oh, God, this is like an ADHD. This is a perfect example of ADHD tax, right? Right. Here we go. Here we go. Settle in. Settle in.
00:08:23
Speaker
um Buckle up. Actually, you know what? We're going to get in the mayor's car. We're going to go to the police station because that seems like a perfect place to to begin this story. So let's jump in. We'll turn the sirens on.
00:08:47
Speaker
L Street bluesy kind of I know I like those like love that electric piano vibes um i I enjoyed recording that one um all right so many many many many many many many years ago going but back in time um I was working at the office on a project. and This was at Redland, actually. And I was working late on it because I'd procrastinated or I'd taken on too much work that I could actually handle. right So I was having to work. you know I'd completely time blinded my myself. I was having to work into that in into the night to get this piece of work done.
00:09:31
Speaker
um and And I had to have it in this guy's hand for the first thing in in the morning, and he lived in London. So ah so once I finished this piece of work, I grabbed the but i just saved it onto a three and a half inch floppy disk. Of course you did. So we were working together at this point. We were working together in the same place. I don't know. Maybe? Maybe? Well, if it was floppy disk, then we were working together. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. All right. So, yeah. So I chopped the... And you didn't tell me any of this. My God, Mr West.
00:10:10
Speaker
I ah feel like Mr Darcy. I know. Mr Darcy. So it's about 1am at this point, right? And I've finished the job, I save it to disk, I shove it in the envelope, I drive in my car, right? all the way up to like somewhere in London, right? ah Drop it off. I'm on my way back and I'm driving through kind of past the Croydon area. And then um then the police car, this is like by this point, it's like two o'clock in the morning and the police car pulls me over and
00:10:52
Speaker
And he's is's like, who have you been have you been drinking? I'm like, no. He says, because I'm looking in your eyes and your eyes are all kind of screwed up, fucked up. I said, no, I just did a load of work. I had to get it in the deadline. I'm really tired. I had to drive up to London to drop it in. It's very stressful. So I'm just like, He said, oh, and let me just search your your car. So he searched my car and he found like a little bit of of of weed, right? Just the the tiniest bit that I had in like a little thing that that that I'd even forgotten about.
00:11:33
Speaker
And even I just forgot about the whole goddamn thing, but it was there, right? Right. So so like he's like, right, right, right. He gets on the phone and the the meat wagon turns up. Right. And then I'm like, I have to go in in in there and they and they take me to the police station. So we're now like half two in the morning or something. Right. Like me. and they wake up the the the doctor or something, um yeah um he gets cool called in, so it's now like three in the in the morning, he's there, I'm there,
00:12:15
Speaker
he asks me a load of questions like like I think he was like trying to find out whether I was high or not right so they took some took a blood sample right um and he was asking me loads of questions about but about when I was born he was just like rapid fire stuff he was really he was he was really pissed off because he was because he was he was he was in dead half an hour ago ah Right. so he So he was like rattling the stuff off. And I was getting really confused because it was like really late at night now. And my brain had just fried by that point. So they submitted fine. And then they took me to the interview room.
00:12:54
Speaker
with the cassette, with the tape machines, you know, like you see in the lovelyland cop shows, right? So there's a bit... I'm sorry, well that cassette exists still somewhere in the bunker of a police station. Wow, it was so long. There's still that cassette of ah Mr. West. Well, there they're supposed to like um get rid of all the have the all of the files and that after a certain number of years. So in theory, that shouldn't exist, but I'd love to hear it. Wow. Yeah, hilarious. So I get lost. low and Loads of loads of questions and then um and then I get held in the police cell overnight. There's a guy.
00:13:39
Speaker
in the next cell to me because I think England had just played or something. It was like the around the Euros or something or the World Cup and he was singing for the rest of the night. It was like singing football songs. um okay and then i was kicked out the next morning and i had to kind of walk all the way to find my car again um so how come i don't know this i don't know but but by the way i wasn't high the the the blood test came back as and negative and right and uh yeah charlie and and okay fine
00:14:23
Speaker
But yeah, i know so there was no weirdness happened. It was just.
00:14:31
Speaker
Yeah, it was just one of those things. So we're at the police were we're at in the police station again, Martyn. This must become quite habitual for you. Right. So we're talking about avi ADHD tax. So this is why why this is a perfect example of the tax that gain right being ah being arrested and spending the night in the jail and all of that crap was basically because I did not plan my time.
Defining ADHD Tax
00:15:02
Speaker
better so that I finished the job at a reasonable time so that I could just put the discs in the post or get a courier to take it over. but but But no, I left it all so late that I ended up having to get in the car and take it to the thing and then I got arrested on the way back. So that was the tax I paid for my emotional tax. Well, it was my time with this tax because that was my thing. It was an emotional tax. Um, uh, you know, it was a taxing like, so yeah, in, in like stress and anxiety. Um, all because I did not let how manage my time. Would you, are you, would you, are you a sort of person of that moment? Would you be, would you, would give you, would you have been really hard on yourself about it in your mind? Yeah. It's like, oh, why do, why do I get myself into that kind of those shenanigans?
00:16:01
Speaker
ah yeah no i
00:16:06
Speaker
ah just Well, because it was the first time that that had ever happened in the house, it hasn't happened since. I kind of viewed it as like like just really bad luck ah at the time, but I look back on it and kind of think, oh okay, yeah i so I see why I set myself up for that. I set myself up for that whole thing to happen. because yeah because i ah I was just time time blood and I didn't future think and anything. so um But yeah, at the time it's just like, oh, that's just dumb, stupid luck that I just happened to drive down that particular street at that particular time with that particular cop. But in reality, no, no i i i I'd basically placed all of the things
00:16:54
Speaker
ah per all d d I'd set up the the the the things in my life so that that would be the consequence. consequence Yeah, in in in yeah. I mean, I've, it's it's weird. i've I think I've had so many of those kind of consequences, those kind of like, um ridiculous situations that you find yourselves in, you know, if you're especially if you, you know, if you're like us, I've got so many that I can't think of one sink, one, one in particular,
00:17:33
Speaker
I know. Yeah. it's where There's so many of them. It's not like there's like a few here and there scattered around. It's like endless. And sometimes I can remember thinking, know how did I get myself into this kind of situation? Mm-hmm. Yeah, so just to be clear so ADHD tax what is a the ADHD tax um it is um The it is the financial or in emotional or time penalty that you pay for for having ADHD. So that could mean but on the my mu on the money side, um you know if you don't open your envelopes and you don't see a bill come in and a final demand come in and then then you're you're scrambling around know because you're because they they just turned off your lights. right
00:18:33
Speaker
So you then have your legs double around to to kind of try and get that sorted out. So know and then you'll end up paying a late fee. Right. So that's like a financial penalty. Then there's the in emotional penalty, which is like the stress and the anxiety that you cause yourself because you shame as well. Yes. And the shame. um And then there's the time penalty part, which is like you end up, you know, that that that saying a stitch in time saves nine, right? You know, that if you if you take care of something early, yeah it'll it'll only take one stitch. but But if you leave it, it'll end up taking nine, nine stitches. So that's the time bit like
00:19:23
Speaker
The extra time that you end up having to sort out the crap. It would take you five minutes to do a particular task like a week, but now it's taking you three hours to sort it out. I don't think I've ever paid a parking fine on time and therefore it not doubling. Right. There you go. ADHD tax. Ever. I've never paid a parking fine on time. Definitely not. Yep. I, yeah, I'm a little bit hit and miss on those. I actually, I actually got one the other just last week. And it's, it's really annoying because I parked, you know, like, um, you can do it through an app now, right? The, the, the, the, quite often the parking place has a little sign and you can download the app and then you pay it on the app. And I did all that.
00:20:20
Speaker
Yeah. And I don't know. It was a little weird, a little funky. Something happened. And then I thought I'd actually done it and paid for it. But I think I actually ended up paying for some other different spots somewhere else. That's that's what I think. You know, like I somehow mixed up with numbers or something because when I came back to the car, oh, yeah, nope. There you go. There's a parking violation. Oh, God. So I've got to pay pay that. um But, yeah, no, because it's now sitting in my car. Right. That that little thing that I need to pay it is sitting in my car. It's not here.
00:20:58
Speaker
I have to remember to get it out of the car, put it here so that I pay it. Otherwise, as you say, it'll it'll be late and I pay a ADHD tax of not only will it be I'm paying more, but then it'll be my wife going, what I've just seen on our bank statements there's there's this penalty, this late penalty thing that you didn't pay. So then I've got all that grief. Right. Yeah. ADHD tax. I once accumulated in Palermo about, I think it got up to like 400 euros in parking fines. Ooh. Yeah. And I didn't pay. What, what, what happens? What happens if it just continues on?
00:21:49
Speaker
Well I was risking it because a friend of mine is is a um a lawyer based in Palermo and she said actually that street because it was it all in a street outside my apartment and she said actually they have no right to give you parking fines along that street and so because they're not connected to the police. And so they were, I don't know, given the right to give fines, but they couldn't actually legally claim the fines in reality. So they chased and chased and chased. And I was like, are you sure?
00:22:28
Speaker
It's like, it's getting like, it's getting like 400 years. Yeah. It's hang tight, hang tight. Oh, right. It came through in the end. It came through. Oh, it was just a Palermo thing. Got it. Yeah. All right. And that makes me feel a little bit easier. Yeah. Cool. I'm just, I'm just, I mean, like after, after that big, uh, I'm just thinking, okay, so, so, uh, I'm just thinking like, so there's the, There's so much. so oh So I think that we kind of get an idea right. I thought i think there was someone said like it how much ADHD costs you in real money each each year. And it's actually quite a substantial
00:23:13
Speaker
yeah amount when you add up all those, those, you know, those fines or the, or the, the extra money that you have to pay because you didn't yeah pay a small amount earlier and, you know, and it it does end up being substantial. in the end it's quite it does quite nuts um yeah i tend to trust people too much as well um and i once yeah i had a messy legal issue once and the and um um it's actually a divorce and it got and it got
00:23:50
Speaker
drawn out. And me being an idiot, and I could say that I didn't get a a from the lawyers, I didn't get a kind of a fee estimate for any of it, ended up paying 14,000 euros. And it was like God, it was ah it was really hard. It was really hard and I'd sleep this night. so yeah How am I gonna pay that off? And it's like, oh god, you know, just trusting people too much. and I don't think that's ADHD at all. It was more just about me, just like trusting. They were actually connected to a friend and I thought they would be honest. Turns out they were really dishonest and lawyers. but Anyway, yeah. But I've got a thing here changing, well not changing the subject, but on a slightly different um ah discussion. I wonder, this is more of a question, whether or not you could um
00:24:55
Speaker
you could expect banks, you know, if they were better, um, the, maybe the bills and contracts, um, bank statements, um, energy bills could be designed better in order that, you know, it could suit ADHD people more. I guess I'm talking about, I know that in the UK, they're pretty good with this kind of thing and it's either really bad. You get a bill in Italy that comes through and it's like, What, what are they asking? What do I have to pay? Right. Yeah. You've said this. So I just, stiffff okay. Yeah. Yeah. like like Like put it to one side, you know, it's, it's, that it's not straight forward and, and, and easy that you'll have to kind of go over here and get that.
00:25:40
Speaker
authorized over here so you can take the authorized thing over to somewhere else to like the levels of bureaucracy are just yeah make it so much harder. I mean they are getting better some of them are better than others but I had a letter from my bank the other day and I thought a life of me couldn't work out what they actually wanted me to do and even my girlfriend who is Italian she said I can't understand it either Oh, wow. It's something to do with insurance related to a bank loan. And I was like, oh, God. And I've ignored it for three weeks now.
00:26:17
Speaker
All right. When I know that I should go into the bank, which is like, Oh God, I need to go to the bank with it and say, what the hell is this? Right. Do I need to do something? Um, so what, and if so, what exactly, what are the consequences if I don't do anything about it? know Right.
Strategies to Avoid ADHD Tax
00:26:39
Speaker
Tons of stuff like that. Yeah. I mean, like so trying to avoid the the ADHD tax is is really about what things can I put in place that combat things like time blindness, you know, so that.
00:26:54
Speaker
um So that I realize that if I don't do it now, that tomorrow there's there's going to be a consequence consequence or like, you know, like, so for banks, for example, that I'm a big proponent of. of getting things on automatic payment, especially all the essential things like lights and anything else that has to be paid. If there's an automatic way of setting that up, I am all in. yeah yeah
00:27:26
Speaker
Yeah, I'm not good at that. Right. Because that's just frees up so much of my headspace. It just goes out, goes out every month, pays, pays, pays, you know, like, um yeah, so, you know, yeah i've and i've got I've got two apartments that I have. ah to you know I have two sets of bills, which is a nightmare. And my son, bless bless him, when I go visit him in Turin, and he gives me a pile of bills. I can feel myself being triggered, and he can feel it as well. He gets nervous.
00:28:06
Speaker
He, like, has a moment to me, like, like, oh, here you are, because we pop. Here I pop. And could tell he's getting anxious because he knows I'm going to get anxious. Right, so there there there is the tax right there. So yeah so if if in this other world you had all of those bills were automatically paid, right um then when you went to visit your son, you two guys wouldn't have that
00:28:38
Speaker
Tension and that anxiety. Yeah. but Yeah. Because then he wouldn't feel bad about having to hand over to his, to his dad, like a bunch of bills, like that. He knows his dad's got to do bad about it. Yeah, no. So it's like, so there's the tax. That's the tax you two guys are planning to pay every time you visit it. Bear in mind, um it's very, very rare. In fact, I don't think it's ever happened. it's never It's never been a case that I couldn't afford to pay the bills. That's not the problem. That's not it. No, it's is because if you have ADHD, you're so used to like,
00:29:22
Speaker
Things going wrong and you have to have a little pile of money over here to kind of pay for something that that you have to do over here. So you're trying to control. You're trying to control it, right? And and you feel like, okay, if I put something on on a direct payment, it comes out of my account. yeah feel like Well, that feels like out of my and control because I might need that money to pay for something over here, right? yeah Which is false thinking most of the time it's because it's actually right. I need to set all this up so that so that yeah everything everything goes out. And that is the real control. That's the real... that Well, also the other element of control is I i really hate unpredictability.
00:30:07
Speaker
but So if I can't predict something, it's like, so if a bill turns up, it's like, Oh God, what's it going to do? And I get, ah it it's a physical fear. I'll get like a stone in my stomach. This is quite bizarre. I hate it. The other thing I thought of, apart from you know maybe banks and energy companies could do a better job on occasions of making information clearer, I wonder if if if it could ever exist one day where you could have ADHD accredited accountants.
Can Systems Adapt to ADHD Needs?
00:30:43
Speaker
What would that look like? you know if If they were like, would it make any difference? Maybe not.
00:30:50
Speaker
I don't know. Cause it's like, I feel like there's some functions where it really, the the whole ADHD thing is really about, so we talk about my taxes, the tax season has just come go and gone and, you know, like really it's about me and my ADHD getting my shit together. So I can just hand it over to an accountant and go, okay, well, And then it's that it's now my responsibility. So um this is something I've got to do later today and tomorrow is that I get the tax tax the all the tax paperwork back. Then I now have to sit and go through all of his work to make sure that it's right.
00:31:35
Speaker
Oh, my God. Right. I really. Well, yeah, because you know what happens, right? If you trust your fucking accountant, they'll they'll make a mistake and then there'll be a screw up and then you and then it's all like fucked up. So so I have to go through it and just make sure that it I mean, that it basically makes some kind of sense, right, that it looks about right. I mean, I can't kind of like go through line by line, but there's points of it that I go. Okay, right. Yeah, that's how much I paid in in freelance fees because I know how much I paid for my business you know my outcagoings right and right? I know how much I paid for Mike for my Photoshop subscription and all that other stuff. So I get all that information. Look, on look, see how much
00:32:29
Speaker
outgoings I had for my business and I have to find that in the paperwork and make sure that they kind of match. Yeah. So there's parts of it that I can kind of look at. um And that's boring, as boring as hell. yeah But if if I don't do it, then yeah I risk trusting people and getting screwed over. Yeah. yeah And the IRS in the States are hardcore, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Generally, paying taxes in Italy is quite, well, how can I say it? They're reasonably flexible. They're pretty good. Yeah. But I know the IRS in the States, they're quite hardcore, which is one of the reasons why your taxes are quite low because they're good at collecting them.
00:33:22
Speaker
maybe we're in Italy tax collecting is crap so the taxes are high and there's a lot of there's a lot of black market kind of shenanigans going on you know yeah tell me more what happens well say you kind of Well, in the i mean there's just ah this is like a um in Italy, there is culturally a um vicious circle of mistrust. There's a mistrust from the public that the government are going to use the taxes properly. okay It's spending on things that need to be spent on and no corruption.
00:34:05
Speaker
ha Okay. But then vice versa, the government don't trust the the public to pay their taxes. So then it just goes round and round and round. And so we end up paying taxes higher than they should be. But also this generally, I don't think there's any more corruption in Italy than there is in the States. Um, it's just things are, um, I think the same in the UK, I think in the UK, generally better at hiding things. I mean, America and the UK famous for just one example of the, the hurricane damage that was done in a new Orleans a few years back, hurricane, whatever it was, a billion dollars of, yeah, billion dollars of aid went missing, disappeared.
00:34:52
Speaker
Just like it's not like it doesn't happen in the states at all. Oh, yeah, no, for sure. But Italians are just more obvious with it. There's less shame about it. It's like, oh, ah Italians say it's not so much that you get caught. It's not so much that you do something that's bad. The the actual the worst thing, the shame is actually being caught. so It's different for them in this culture in this country. Yeah, yeah. I want to get on to like AGST tax and should you pay it. So what I mean by that is.
Pay Now, Save Later: A Different ADHD Tax
00:35:28
Speaker
ah You should definitely not try and cut down on the amount of money that goes out because you know of late fees and even like things like so subscriptions that you may have signed up to you know like and and then you forget. right and Then there's all this money just leaking out of your account. right so yeah and and and and and and all all of that yeah and and And you forget that it's there. right So all of that stuff yeah like should be taxed that you should shouldn't be paying. right so So you should try and deal with all that stuff in the same way that... you know um yeah if
00:36:17
Speaker
if there's something that you can do now that will save a disaster tomorrow, then you should do it now. right so yeah So you don't pay the the the time tax and the emotional tax. but All of those things shouldn't be, you should not be paying it. When I say, well, should you pay it? There are times like
00:36:43
Speaker
um And I find this like if I'm in a store and I need something that I always have. Right. So say it's, um ah I don't know, say it's like soap. I don't know. Right. And I will go and get a bar of soap. Right. And I go, oh, look, it's bar of soap. Oh, look, it's on sale. Great. Right. I'll just I'll just have that. And if I have to save myself a few cents. there, brilliant, move on. um Whereas actually, if you go, you know what, I'm going to spend more now and I'm going to get 20 of these, yeah even though I don't need 20.
00:37:23
Speaker
But I know that that if I get them now, then I'm going to save much more money that way. But I'm going to spend more now. I'm going to spend it now to save it, to save myself for tomorrow. So I don't I won't have to buy soap for like for the rest of the year. Right. um And and I can save myself. Yeah. True. Yeah. Unless you've been out there. Yeah. tooy boy
00:37:55
Speaker
before never um ah yeah So, you know, like. there are There are times when it's worth putting in effort and time or money early, you know, almost like a tax, right almost like, OK, right, well, you know, I would i'd normally spend a buck on this bucket of soap, but I'm going to spend 30 bucks. Right. I'm going to pay that now so that I save. So for the rest of the year, I don't have to buy soap ever again. And I've saved myself 10, 10 bucks. Right. So sometimes it's worth not just in the money things, but just worth um spending time, money.
00:38:46
Speaker
up front, but more than you would normally, more than you would, yeah, you spend more than you would normally, but down the line, you win. Yeah. i I kind of do a bit of that. I mean, I tend to, I don't, I generally don't buy cheap clothes. It's like, I won't go into, I don't know what you have in the States, but I won't, I won't, I won't buy my clothes from like Zara's that you have we have a the in Europe or,
00:39:21
Speaker
kind of like the cheaper shops because I know it just won't last and I'll buy like a good pair of jeans like Diesel or Paul Smith or something and they've lost I've got jeans that have lasted you know 15 years so I do a bit of that you know and it's like one thing that I don't have to think about you know, by a pair of chains or sometimes of by two, if I'm really the extravagant. And um it's like, I'd have to think about trousers also because I hate the transitional part of trying on trousers.
00:39:53
Speaker
Oh you sure yeah, that whole buying clothes. Oh yeah, it's odd it's horrible. Those changing rooms. Oh, it's just horrible. Yeah, it is. It is. It is. It is just like nasty. So uncomfortable, weird. Yeah. So then if you if you get to know, like I know diesel chains, I know what cut to buy, and I know what mesh to buy, and I buy maybe two pairs in two different colors. Oh, that saves me a whole load of of stress for yeah for a long time.
00:40:28
Speaker
You know, right. So, yeah, so that I would argue is a is a tax that you should pay, right? So if you buy one thing, OK, maybe you spend more money on a quality item so that you're paying that tax upfront, right? You just pay that extra money. But yeah, as you say, you know that that thing is going to last you for like for ages and ages. yeah you know so There's another aspect of this is it is is that having been what you were diagnosed a long time before me, but been diagnosed recently, but i it's now come to mind as we're doing this podcast.
00:41:12
Speaker
I went for years, or yeah for years actually. I always wondered, why like Paul, ah you is this some kind of self-sabotage thing you do? This is before I had ADHD diagnosis and it was ah wasn't on my radar. um just like I spent a lot of wasted, a lot of time and energy thinking, why the hell am I doing this self-sabotage thing? you know Not paying my bills, causing myself grief and anxiety. So it's like, uh, post well got what I'm really getting the point of trying to make is that after my diagnosis, it is less, I'll pay less taxes in a way, because at least I know what it is. Mm-hmm.
00:42:00
Speaker
at least I know what it is now and you could, I could do something about it and, you know, um, hopefully build up, I mean, it's early doors, but you know, build up a new set of mental tools to avoid them when I can. At least that. I just, I just thought of of ah of an another ADHD thing and should you pay it? So for example, a So if I'm in a store, right, and I and i know that we're out of of washing up liquid, right?
00:42:40
Speaker
and we're completely out and I desperately need a toilet rolls. Let's do toilet rolls because they're even more essential, right? I know that I'm down to my last few like like squares on a roll, right? Squares on a roll. And built it but actually, let's say I've got like a day's worth, right? So I've got a few, right? like yeah i've got I've got enough to kind of get through the next day and maybe if I just hold it in a bit, i bit ill but I'll be fine, right? And I'm in the store and I see that there's toilet rolls there, right? right And they're quite expensive. I mean, they're, you know, well, they are a regular price for a store, but I know that if I go back home and I order them on Amazon or something, all right, I can get them a lot cheaper.
00:43:34
Speaker
Yeah. and And you sit there and kind of go, right. Well, do I buy the expensive ones now? And I know that I have them. Or do I go home, get, go online, get them, and then they'll be delivered in time from a little bum and I'll be, you know, and then I'll but and then i'll have the toilet Rosa and I'll save myself 10 quid, right? right or something so that's like a do you pay the ADHD tax or not so I will go this is the the the the conversation I have with myself and sometimes me and my wife had the same conversations like
00:44:15
Speaker
We have ADHD. That's true. You'll forget. When you go home, you'll forget to go online. You'll forget to buy them. That's the thing, yeah. And then you'll run out. So no, buy the expensive toilet rolls now. Pay the tax. Pay the ADHD tax because you have ADHD. so that So that you'll have them now. and you know like So that is ah an example of, yeah, you pay the ADHD tax because you know you have ADHD. It's wishful thinking to think that you'll go home and yeah you'll sort it out. You just have to know yourself to kind of go, yeah, no, I won't. I won't sort it out. oh'll
00:44:57
Speaker
I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll, I'll forget. And then, yeah. And then I'll be on the toilet and get to go wrong. The other tax, it's like you, you, you, offer to double, double your, your, you double your trip because you get home and your girlfriend says to you, did you get, you know, so you got this. Yeah. And you got that. Yeah. And this and that, but you didn't actually get the thing that you were supposed to get the one thing that you actually went out for. You brought back, ah in my case, it would be dark chocolate with mandolin. What's it in English? Mac de Munoz? Almonds. Thank you. Almonds. This is my go-to chocolate, dark chocolate with the almonds, right? it's like So got your bar of freaking dark chocolate with the almonds, but you didn't get the thing that I wanted you to go and get. see What do you do?
00:45:56
Speaker
you spend more money petrol, which is getting more and more expensive. ah yeah So that's another tax back out. God. Yeah. Right. Because because what I do in these things more and more and more is that when I hear something like, oh, Martin, can you go out and get some toothpaste? Right. Yeah. is that My magical ADHD mind thinking will go, I'll remember that. I'll remember that. Don't worry. I've got an image in my head of toothpaste. It's just one thing. What could go wrong? I've got, I've got, I've even blinked at the empty toothpaste in the bathroom for half an hour. Just to help until your eyes bled.
00:46:48
Speaker
Yeah. So what could possibly go wrong? I've got really good visual memory. I've got ADHD. Excellent visual memory. a magical ADHD thinking. So you go out, you go in the store and you get, oh look, chocolate, oh look, almond chocolate, oh look at this. And then you wander out and you forget the whole thing. So more and more, I grab my phone and I will write down in the little notes, you know, like my iPhone notes, right? I've got so many iPhone notes.
00:47:20
Speaker
that ah but i'll just I'll just create ah a new note, things to get, right? Even if it's just one item, right? Toothpaste, right? And I'll rob write it down there. And then I'll then the trick is to actually remember when you're in the store is to pull it up. Right. Even if you think you know what's on there, even if you know, it's just one item because substance because sometimes it actually, oh yeah, I remember. Oh yeah. She said something else as well that I wrote down and I forgot. Yeah. So you go, oh shit, it's not just toothpaste. It was like, you know, eyeliner or something. Right. And then.
00:47:58
Speaker
and then ah And then, right, so so then you're kind of like, OK, fine, I've got got it on my own on my phone. And even better if um on those things, if my wife takes a and chee does she does, she'll take a photo of the thing. like are you told me yeah if it's a certain thing like so you know um if it's like her brand of shampoo or her brand of whatever right so like so i so i can look at the picture on the phone and look at the item and kind of go yeah these are the same um but you know like maybe getting like whiplash
00:48:38
Speaker
Right. but Yeah, no, that that's just good. Crack. Yeah. um and've got I'll have to go and get some aspirin now. um Yeah. Oh, I've just paid the ADHD tax. I've had to get some aspirin painkillers because ive yeah because I was. Anyway, um so you're having habits like that. then solve the the the ADHD tax you end up with to pay because you now got time and gas money and petrol money. And, you know, for him to go out again and and your and your girlfriend or your wife's going, what the hell? Where's my bloody toothpaste, you bastard? You had one job. Right. One job. Right. So it's it's that magical ADHD thinking of like, oh, no, I've got this.
00:49:27
Speaker
Yeah. as As soon as your your your mind goes, Oh, I've got ADHD. So therefore yeah I'm going to have to change the game. And it might end up costing me a bit more, but what about this is a provocation. What if the shopping task was actually something yes that you really like to shop for? Like you went to the artist's material shop. Oh, no. I just feel so creative I feel much more creative inside. it If I could just set up and an easel inside the store and just I feel so much more creative inside an art supply store than I do in the parking lot out outside of places.
00:50:21
Speaker
I know. actually until ah I went to an artist's material shop in Palermo and I dropped a massive jar of black ink all over the floor.
00:50:38
Speaker
Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit
00:50:45
Speaker
it all is slow were
00:50:53
Speaker
And I didn't have to pay for it, I must admit. Oh, what? You didn't? No, it was on the shelf and I just, just that it was really tight spaces and I think, I don't know. Yeah, I didn't. Is that bad? is if If you break it, you pay for it. That's usually the rule. All right. yeah but eli yeah feel art material like right
00:51:23
Speaker
Okay. Well, on that interesting. You remember it, don't you? you yeah not forget it's like oh yeah i need to get um an extra fat brush because i'm gonna do a self-portrait that's three three meters by two meters you're never gonna forget that that fat brush that sable beautiful sable brush No, yeah yeah, so that's the point that the the things that you're interested in your little your little hyper fix fixation things. Oh, yeah. No, but yeah, those are the fine. It's all the boring stuff. It's the boring stuff that gets you. Yeah. yeah
00:52:05
Speaker
All right. Well, there you go. So, uh, um, 52 minutes. I know. I know. So I feel like, um, I don't actually have any, any, any posts. I don't feel like there's any particular reason to go back to the post office hunt drive straight back to the, um, office. Right. Well, let's jump in the car. Hopefully I've put enough petrol or gas in it so that we actually get back because I've got the i've i've led it i've got my magical thinking in that I'm thinking that I can let the tank run and down and down and down. And I'm like, that I have not. and Let's see if we get there. That's one good thing about modern cars.
00:52:53
Speaker
modern cars, modern cars. He says, Oh, you've got seven column kilometers left of petrol and it's really reliable. That helps me a hell of a lot. Right. Yeah. a lot i've i've i i i Yeah. Because the cause yeah because the ADHD tax is there is that is that if you don't fucking fill it up and you end up stranded and all the drama that that causes. a um All right. So back in the town hall. Yeah. Yeah. Back in the town hall.
00:53:27
Speaker
um so it just leaves me to say that ADHD bill is delivered fresh every Tuesday to all purveyors a fine podcast be subscribed to the pod and rate us most most most most forgetful of words and feel free to correspond at will in the comments but wait there's more If you wish to see our beautiful, beautiful faces. Ow, I hit the mic. um him by In my arm waving. um yeah If you wish to see our beautiful faces, then Sally Fields to the YouTubes.
00:54:08
Speaker
I took your line. Damn, ah but have I was just ready to champagne jump Jump in with, yeah, this just said Sally Fields. I love Sally Fields. Always classic thing for her. And you can also wear pick up a quill and email us at ADHDville at gmail dot.com. I do read them, by the way. Um, so, uh, yeah, let's hit the outer button and say, visit us on YouTube. Uh, tick tock, tick tock's the whole thing. good good Go, go, go and find us a, uh, the couple of friends known as, uh, Facebook and Instagram. But in the meantime, be fucking kind to yourself.
00:54:53
Speaker
And I beseech you, fellow ADHDers, know thyself, suds of the hounds, come hither and get the flesh. Perhaps beef this time. I don't know if I understood what that actually means. It just sounds good. Get the beef. It sounds dramatic. It is very... It's good enough. Very dramatic. Because you said Paul, you need to improve your outro. Here we go. That's the first thing that came to mind. And that's what came back. It back. ah came back i was i was not I was not expecting that outro.
00:55:28
Speaker
Yeah. To to be fair. All right. There we go. ready That's it. Let's get out of here. yeah hello is the man That's that.