Travel Exhaustion and Parental Guilt
00:00:06
Speaker
It's Salman Qureshi.
00:00:07
Speaker
You're listening to the Expat Brad Podcast, and I am exhausted.
00:00:13
Speaker
Guys, I've been traveling for nine days now.
00:00:20
Speaker
I've been in Algeria for nine days.
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Speaker
It's the last day, and I'm heading back tomorrow.
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Speaker
And while it's been super fun and awesome, I can't wait to get back home, right?
00:00:32
Speaker
You start missing the family.
00:00:34
Speaker
You start forgetting how much your kid doesn't let you sleep.
00:00:39
Speaker
And you just want to go back to it and start living that again.
00:00:47
Speaker
I have parental guilt, right?
00:00:49
Speaker
Every time I'm away, even for like the day, I just feel like I'm letting my kid down by not being there for him.
00:00:56
Speaker
Especially because Zayan is so...
00:01:01
Speaker
Very lucky to have a kid like that.
00:01:03
Speaker
He's just so loving.
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Speaker
He wants to be around with me and he really snuggles in and stuff.
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Speaker
And I just go, yeah, this has been great.
00:01:14
Speaker
Daddy's got to go out and do stuff, you know?
00:01:20
Speaker
Parental guilt is just crap.
00:01:22
Speaker
It's just, I wish I didn't have it.
00:01:25
Speaker
Well, I think it's a good thing I have it because then it forces you to be a
00:01:30
Speaker
Better dad, parent?
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Speaker
They never warn you about these things.
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Speaker
No one talks or you don't understand any of it until it's too late.
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Speaker
And then you're like, oh, no, I'm going to have this for the rest of my life now.
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Speaker
Let's make this work.
Exploring Michael Jackson's Legacy
00:01:48
Speaker
Speaking of children, they're making a Michael Jackson.
00:01:51
Speaker
I can't believe I said that.
00:01:53
Speaker
They're making a Michael Jackson movie, though, and I'm kind of –
00:01:58
Speaker
blah about it, you know, just wondering who's it for and why and that's obvious, isn't it?
00:02:04
Speaker
They're making a movie to kind of introduce him to a younger audience and tell his side of the story and wipe out the contentious stuff and put him in good light again, right?
00:02:22
Speaker
And his nephew is playing Michael.
00:02:26
Speaker
And that'll be kind of cool to see, I guess.
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Speaker
But I wonder if it's...
00:02:31
Speaker
You know what I wonder about is, though, is anyone interested in watching a Michael Jackson movie?
00:02:37
Speaker
I mean, his show did really well, though, right?
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Speaker
The live show, they went around doing it.
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Speaker
And recently, there have been some good ones like the Elvis one and blah, blah, blah.
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Speaker
I'm never really too excited about it, too.
00:02:50
Speaker
And when Michael's, maybe for me, Michael's story is just still very recent.
00:02:57
Speaker
God, how long has it been since he died?
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Speaker
Has it been 10 years maybe?
00:03:02
Speaker
I think at least 10 years, right?
00:03:06
Speaker
And I just think that should be long enough.
00:03:10
Speaker
They make Spider-Man movies every three years.
00:03:14
Speaker
So I guess, you know what?
00:03:16
Speaker
Yeah, you're right.
00:03:18
Speaker
We could have a Michael Jackson movie.
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Speaker
What am I talking about?
00:03:22
Speaker
I think I will go watch it just to see what aspects they show and what they might reveal in it in terms of his life.
00:03:34
Speaker
Because I watched that documentary when it came out.
00:03:37
Speaker
In the cinema, this is it.
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Speaker
And that was a very interesting one to see him.
00:03:45
Speaker
cool and at the same time you go wow he's really amazing but also weird man
Fame and Reality in the Entertainment Industry
00:03:53
Speaker
and like this is just strange and i can imagine his life i can't imagine his life right i don't know what fame does to these people uh to anyone with that kind of power and fame i i only ever caught a glimpse i did this show right and
00:04:11
Speaker
with a couple of other big comics.
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Speaker
And one of the comics was a big name.
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Speaker
And we did this at a university.
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Speaker
And there were about 600 people or so in attendance, more.
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Speaker
And as soon as the show ended, they kind of chased us into this big green room.
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Speaker
The green room was actually like a ballroom.
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Speaker
And they just fought through security to get in.
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Speaker
And they're taking photos with me as well because I was with those guys.
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Speaker
And they were just like,
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Speaker
you know covering like like just treating like just fans right like it was like beatlemania for me yeah uh i haven't experienced anything ever like that again but they chased us all the way to the car we got to our cars and they were still chasing to take pictures with us and it always made me go man this would go to my head if i had this like every day uh because it did i
00:05:07
Speaker
four or five minutes I was like god I am I am the shizzle uh shizzle shizzle uh that's the Irish drunk version of it and and that's it's true it's just um I kind of just uh uh just just felt that and I always remember that because for me it was humbling to just drive away and then be a nobody again
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Speaker
Because when I got home, there wasn't any a bunch of people want to take my pictures down my house or adding me on social media and whatnot.
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Speaker
It was over and it allowed me to be normal again.
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Speaker
Kind of shitty, but OK.
00:05:49
Speaker
But I'll never forget it for that one reason that you just go.
00:05:52
Speaker
In fact, I can tell you this Bollywood star, Baman Irani, he told me he was doing this run of plays in Mumbai and the series of runs.
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Speaker
And he said it was one of the most well received.
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Speaker
This is, I think, just before he became big in movies, though.
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Speaker
Or just right at the start.
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Speaker
And this run of plays, Salman, it was one of the best runs ever.
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We got a standing ovation.
00:06:29
Speaker
Standing ovation every time.
00:06:34
Speaker
He was just like, I would leave on this high.
00:06:36
Speaker
But then I walked out one of the nights and this police constable, he goes, is this your car?
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Speaker
And he says, yeah.
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Speaker
He's like, it's park wrong and move it right now.
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Speaker
And blah, blah, blah.
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Speaker
So he treated him like shit.
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Speaker
And he was like, I was immediately humbled.
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Speaker
And I thought, shit.
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Speaker
And, you know, when I was...
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Speaker
When I was inside, they were treating me like God, and then this guy's just putting me back in this place.
00:07:05
Speaker
Why am I telling you guys this story?
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Speaker
It's the same reason, this humbling of things, you know?
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Speaker
And so that kind of keeps you grounded a little bit.
00:07:16
Speaker
But Michael Jackson was never grounded.
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Speaker
So he was always going to be like weird, man.
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Speaker
Like he was just on a different level of fame.
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Speaker
But I was a huge fan too.
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Speaker
I still listen to his music sometimes.
Childhood Fascination with Michael Jackson
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Speaker
And in fact, it was this habit of mine when Zion was born.
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Speaker
I was changing his diapers to Michael Jackson's.
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Speaker
And Zayn would kind of calm down to it, too.
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Speaker
And then my wife messed it up for me.
00:07:45
Speaker
I think it was Sarah who said, you know, around that time, that controversial documentary came out with these two guys accusing him again.
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Speaker
And she said, it's a bit weird now.
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Speaker
And I was like, it's weird now because you said it's weird.
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Speaker
It was okay for me.
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Speaker
I wasn't thinking about that.
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Speaker
And now I can't listen to those songs while changing his diaper.
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Speaker
And it all fell apart.
00:08:07
Speaker
It all fell apart.
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Speaker
Luckily, he grew out of that phase and...
00:08:15
Speaker
I remember I started when I was a kid and I watched Thriller.
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Speaker
I must have been three, four.
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Speaker
And I was like scared of that video, but I also enjoyed it.
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Speaker
So I would kind of peek through the door and see it and just be thrilled.
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Speaker
And I loved it, but I was also like, ah, it's a monster.
00:08:37
Speaker
And it was cool and that's like, you know, it's seared into my brain and I started dancing because of Michael, you know, I always enjoyed dancing because he was like one of my first heroes.
00:08:49
Speaker
And the time we went to London as a family, our first time ever as well with me at least.
00:08:59
Speaker
Because we lived in Southie, there were no – Michael Jackson was banned there, right?
00:09:04
Speaker
So he was in the 80s, early – late 80s.
00:09:08
Speaker
I think around the time Bad came out and they banned him.
00:09:13
Speaker
Yeah, I think I've talked about this in my previous podcast episodes.
00:09:16
Speaker
He was banned and basically I couldn't get any of his VHS tapes or music.
00:09:21
Speaker
So when we went to London, we picked up those cassettes and I just remember watching all his music videos over and over and over again.
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Speaker
And some of those cassettes and movies were about kind of behind the scenes stuff with the music videos.
00:09:41
Speaker
And I grew up watching that stuff, man.
00:09:43
Speaker
And he was the coolest person I knew.
00:09:45
Speaker
And I find anyone who used to be like, no, he's past his prime, blah, blah, blah.
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Speaker
I would fight people and always reigned a fan that way.
00:10:01
Speaker
I look at his last few years and I go, wow, he looked strange and that sad.
00:10:07
Speaker
Why am I – I'm basically convincing myself to go watch this movie now, aren't I?
00:10:13
Speaker
It's crazy, I guess.
00:10:14
Speaker
Well, there you go, guys.
00:10:16
Speaker
There's the answer.
00:10:17
Speaker
They're making this movie for suckers like me.
00:10:20
Speaker
And I might just go to the cinema and watch it too.
00:10:23
Speaker
I can't believe I'm doing this.
00:10:27
Speaker
I just hope I get busy around the time it's released and not get time to watch it just like hundreds of other movies in the last few years that I've really wanted to watch.
00:10:36
Speaker
And then I don't get time.
00:10:37
Speaker
And then I find out they've taken it off.
00:10:40
Speaker
And it's just like I love cinema.
00:10:45
Speaker
And I can't manage to –
00:10:49
Speaker
you know i i'm the worst lover of movies and cinema because i never go to the cinema uh end up watching some of the stuff at home instead and at least i do i do love movies watching them and everything but man just just yeah and and i live in dubai where you have the most awesome of cinemas you know with great food and clean seats and whatnot you know it's just amazing
00:11:16
Speaker
And yet I sit at home in my PJs, watching it all on my big TV, not making the effort.
Cinema Habits and Literary Promotions
00:11:25
Speaker
It's a shame though, because...
00:11:27
Speaker
My dad is probably the most hardworking person ever in this world.
00:11:32
Speaker
And I don't know how his like kid, meaning me, has been so lazy.
00:11:47
Speaker
So a couple of things, man.
00:11:49
Speaker
There's the Lit Fest starting soon in Dubai.
00:11:51
Speaker
If you are there, the Emirates Lit Fest.
00:11:53
Speaker
Is it still called Emirates Lit Fest?
00:11:57
Speaker
and that's always awesome but really really proud of two of my very lovely friends hanana zaheer and fey brand they they're both um artists and that's my phone going off it's very unprofessional to not have this on silent while recording and um
00:12:18
Speaker
They're published authors and this time they're coming back to run some workshops and talks and whatnot.
00:12:24
Speaker
That's really cool and I'm catching them all after a few years.
00:12:27
Speaker
So this is going to be exciting for me.
00:12:30
Speaker
And if you are involved in the Lit Fest, then go out and check what these guys are up to.
00:12:37
Speaker
I don't have the schedule on me, but it's pretty easy to find on the website and on the thing and blah, blah, blah.
00:12:43
Speaker
So do check out their stuff.
00:12:45
Speaker
Do check out whatever they're up to.
00:12:48
Speaker
and visit them and tell them Salman sent you and then if it's terrible, then you guys can leave a comment on my Instagram for the expat brat and just tell me off and I will have a word with my friends and tell them why did they have to like go embarrass me about this stuff, you know?
00:13:12
Speaker
This just went downhill really, really fast.
00:13:15
Speaker
Like I was so positive and happy about this.
00:13:17
Speaker
And now, anywho, I'm excited.
00:13:21
Speaker
Flying still gets me excited.
00:13:23
Speaker
At the same time, I have a love-hate thing with flying.
00:13:28
Speaker
And at least I don't have to fly away from
Courage and Sacrifice: Ashkan Morovati's Story
00:13:32
Speaker
Dude, I was just reading this story of this guy called Ashkan Morovatis.
00:13:40
Speaker
So this Kurdish-Iranian wrestler, he's one of the guys who had to escape the recent protests.
00:13:46
Speaker
And man, it's just wild, right?
00:13:48
Speaker
Like the dude was at, back in October, he's at this protest, a rally,
00:13:57
Speaker
And I don't think he was like really part part of it, but he walks up to some of the police officers.
00:14:03
Speaker
This is his side of the story.
00:14:05
Speaker
And he tells them not to be so heavy handed on the protesters.
00:14:12
Speaker
And instead, they start beating him up.
00:14:13
Speaker
And this is the clip of his that went viral, and that's why he's famous.
00:14:18
Speaker
It's this clip of him surrounded by these, you know, army guys and stuff, the police.
00:14:26
Speaker
And he's got a knife on them, and they're wielding batons and their guns at him, aimed at him.
00:14:34
Speaker
And then they just shoot him, right, like a few times on the feet, the legs and stuff.
00:14:39
Speaker
And so that clip went viral and basically that's his version of what happened.
00:14:44
Speaker
And then he ends up in the hospital.
00:14:47
Speaker
I think after, if I remember, he, yeah, so he gets shot.
00:14:52
Speaker
They carry him in an ambulance.
00:14:53
Speaker
They shoot him again in the ambulance and they really thought he's going to die.
00:14:57
Speaker
So there was just like, we'll take him to the hospital.
00:14:58
Speaker
He's going to die there.
00:15:00
Speaker
And, and he survives it, right?
00:15:03
Speaker
10 days later, they haul him,
00:15:06
Speaker
to like the jail while he's still recovering and he's in pain for another 10 days until his family is pressuring them and blah, blah, blah.
00:15:16
Speaker
The government finally to move him to an army base where he's still like, you know, doing badly in the armies.
00:15:23
Speaker
Like, listen, you got to send him to a better hospital.
00:15:26
Speaker
And these guys agree, the police and stuff, the courts.
00:15:32
Speaker
And then the courts put a case on him.
00:15:34
Speaker
I forget the word, but apparently it's a treason against God kind of thing, basically a form of blasphemy.
00:15:43
Speaker
And now, you know, the punishment for that is death.
00:15:46
Speaker
He hasn't attended court.
00:15:48
Speaker
He has not had a trial.
00:15:49
Speaker
And they've passed the sentence on him that he is guilty of that.
00:15:53
Speaker
So he uses the excuse of moving from the army hospital to find his hospital, his own hospital,
00:16:01
Speaker
to get out of the country.
00:16:02
Speaker
And now he's in an undisclosed location.
00:16:06
Speaker
He's still suffering.
00:16:07
Speaker
I guess his boxing career is over because his legs are shot and one of his legs has gone numb.
00:16:12
Speaker
And it's horrific, right?
00:16:14
Speaker
And every so often when I come across stories like that, I just go, would I make those kind of sacrifices?
00:16:26
Speaker
Maybe when I was younger.
00:16:30
Speaker
You know what the other problem is?
00:16:31
Speaker
He says at the end, the great thing about him, and I'm not deriding what he did.
00:16:34
Speaker
I think it's great that he has that courage.
00:16:37
Speaker
And he goes at the end of this interview, he tells them, I'm ready to die a thousand times so that my country can be freed.
00:16:47
Speaker
And that really hit me because I was like, whoa.
00:16:51
Speaker
And that's the difference, right?
00:16:52
Speaker
So I, as an expat,
00:16:55
Speaker
Kid, I don't have that love or loyalty to any place because I know... Unfortunately, most of the places I've stayed, they haven't created that loyalty because I've always been kind of an outsider, right?
00:17:11
Speaker
path towards citizenship or whatnot.
00:17:15
Speaker
And maybe, and so my cousins in the States or Canada, their kids are loyal to the place and they love it and it's their home.
00:17:22
Speaker
And I don't have that as an expat.
00:17:23
Speaker
And so I guess that's why I wouldn't, and I've not, I don't have a lot of link to my home country.
00:17:31
Speaker
Basically, I wouldn't get shot.
00:17:35
Speaker
I wouldn't risk it, right?
00:17:36
Speaker
Like, they'd have to shoot me in my throat to stop me from doing comedy again.
00:17:42
Speaker
And that's terrible.
00:17:44
Speaker
It's just you don't want to.
00:17:46
Speaker
Yeah, I guess being a little bit of an expat brat helps in that context.
00:17:56
Speaker
What kind of sad existence do I have, people, that I have?
00:18:01
Speaker
What would I die for?
00:18:02
Speaker
I would die for my family for sure, right?
00:18:04
Speaker
Like my parents, my wife and kid, my siblings.
00:18:08
Speaker
Definitely, definitely, definitely.
00:18:10
Speaker
Would I die for anything else?
00:18:12
Speaker
There are a couple of friends who I might die for.
00:18:16
Speaker
I don't want to name these guys because then the other friends will know.
00:18:19
Speaker
And also, I don't want to create this hope that I'll definitely do it for them.
00:18:23
Speaker
It'll be one of those things we'll find out in the moment.
00:18:26
Speaker
It'll be like, oh, well, I guess he was never that close.
00:18:35
Speaker
That'd be a sad way to find out for them, not for me.
00:18:39
Speaker
I'd walk out there pretty satisfied with myself knowing I'm more clear about life and my future decision making is more simple.
00:18:50
Speaker
But I think I would.
00:18:51
Speaker
I think a couple of friends I would.
00:18:52
Speaker
There's a couple of cousins I would do it to for.
00:18:56
Speaker
Other than that, you guys are on your own.
00:18:58
Speaker
Yeah, no help from me.
00:18:59
Speaker
Although, as I mentioned in some episodes, I am now trained in delivering
Art vs. Artist Debate and Personal Reflections
00:19:04
Speaker
So if it's safe for me, I might still save you.
00:19:10
Speaker
But to die for you.
00:19:11
Speaker
Yeah, that's the difference.
00:19:12
Speaker
That's too much to ask of anyone, really.
00:19:16
Speaker
I wouldn't expect...
00:19:18
Speaker
or want really anyone else dying in my place.
00:19:22
Speaker
So I would like everyone else to be as unselfish too, except for, like I said, like, you know, my family.
00:19:34
Speaker
Why am I talking about that, guys?
00:19:37
Speaker
We have been talking about that.
00:19:39
Speaker
Michael Jackson's dead and now they're making a movie.
00:19:42
Speaker
And now this all this.
00:19:44
Speaker
Let's let's do some positive stuff.
00:19:46
Speaker
Like I've been talking to you guys about Chuck.
00:19:50
Speaker
And if you haven't watched it, watch it.
00:19:52
Speaker
It's a great series.
00:19:53
Speaker
Five seasons and it was done and blah, blah, blah, blah.
00:19:57
Speaker
And then one of my friends, Rami, sends me this thing just a couple of days ago.
00:20:01
Speaker
Was it yesterday, right?
00:20:03
Speaker
He sends me about how the guy's an anti-vaxxer.
00:20:13
Speaker
And I was like, why did I have to find that out?
00:20:17
Speaker
And it's bizarre, right?
00:20:18
Speaker
Because I'm just like, do I care?
00:20:22
Speaker
I mean, at the beginning of this episode, I'm talking about loving Michael Jackson, still do, and listen to his music.
00:20:29
Speaker
And here's Zach Levy with his support for Trump, I think as well.
00:20:35
Speaker
And for speaking out against vaccines.
00:20:40
Speaker
And I'm like, I don't want to make those choices anymore.
00:20:43
Speaker
I don't want to have to.
00:20:47
Speaker
Can we separate age old question?
00:20:49
Speaker
Can we separate art from the artist?
00:20:51
Speaker
And in his case, maybe I just don't care enough.
00:20:56
Speaker
I don't love him anyway.
00:20:58
Speaker
So it's not like anything that he does, I make sure I watch it.
00:21:04
Speaker
I haven't watched Shazam yet.
00:21:06
Speaker
It's on my list of movies to watch.
00:21:08
Speaker
And I missed it when it came out.
00:21:10
Speaker
And I was excited about it.
00:21:11
Speaker
Just again, this is a recurring theme about death and me missing things.
00:21:18
Speaker
Not watching things I should and want to watch.
00:21:21
Speaker
And then death and then things I did.
00:21:25
Speaker
What an awesomely crafted episode, people.
00:21:29
Speaker
Maybe we'll fit in one more quick one about...
00:21:33
Speaker
Can we fit in another death here real quick?
00:21:37
Speaker
Who else died that has a big meaning on my life or what?
00:21:43
Speaker
I can't think of anything.
00:21:47
Speaker
Yeah, this thing about this celebrities, man.
00:21:50
Speaker
I'm making a call going forward.
00:21:54
Speaker
I'm just getting out of the cancel culture culture because I agree with it.
00:21:59
Speaker
I'm not one of those people who say they shouldn't.
00:22:02
Speaker
be canceling, well, not per se like that, but you know, you should be arrested.
00:22:07
Speaker
If you're like Harvey Weinstein, Weinstein, Weinstein, I'm just not getting anything right today.
00:22:16
Speaker
If you're like that, yeah, definitely cancel that stuff and send you to prison kind of situation.
00:22:24
Speaker
Everything below that, I'm just like, let the law deal with it.
00:22:29
Speaker
And I don't want to get involved.
00:22:32
Speaker
I don't want to know.
00:22:33
Speaker
Actually, I do want to know.
00:22:35
Speaker
I don't want to make that decision.
00:22:38
Speaker
Because every so often, maybe it's one out of ten, they won't be guilty.
00:22:44
Speaker
And innocent till guilty.
00:22:52
Speaker
So that's tough too, right?
00:22:54
Speaker
Like there might be overwhelming evidence and stuff.
00:22:59
Speaker
And in which case, yeah, go for it.
00:23:01
Speaker
But I just, I think I just want to leave this back to the cops who happened to kill,
00:23:07
Speaker
Black people wait to.
00:23:09
Speaker
Oh, my God, we're talking about that.
00:23:10
Speaker
I did find some that didn't I?
00:23:12
Speaker
I found some that and.
00:23:17
Speaker
And so maybe I should end on something I really want to watch what's coming up.
00:23:22
Speaker
I'm going to watch the next big movie that comes out that I really want to watch.
00:23:25
Speaker
I'm going to make sure I go to cinema and watch it there and be part of the cinematic experience of movies again and contribute to the industry I love so much and part of it in French ways or rather on the French way.
00:23:42
Speaker
You get what I mean.
00:23:44
Speaker
I think I'm going to stop there, guys.
00:23:46
Speaker
This has been good.
00:23:47
Speaker
I've had a long 9, 10 days.
00:23:50
Speaker
And I want to get some sleep.
00:23:51
Speaker
I have an early morning tomorrow again.
00:23:52
Speaker
And I'm flying tomorrow.
00:23:53
Speaker
So you guys take care.
00:23:56
Speaker
And I'll see you in the next episode.
00:23:59
Speaker
Or as a dog would say, woof.