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S2 Episode 9 - Toxic traits 😈 - part 2
26 Plays4 months ago
In this one Ben and Lewis talk through the second half of toxic traits.
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Transcript
Recap and Energy Challenge
00:00:00
Speaker
Hey everyone, welcome back to Working Out. I'm Lewis. And I'm Ben. How you doing, mate? I'm good, thank you. Yeah, yourself? Good, thanks as well. I'm good, as good as... I don't know. I am good as well, thank you, mate. Are you sure there's not something else you want to say? that No, I don't know what I was thinking. There's a bit of a tired vibe going on in the studio today. um But
Perfectionism as a Barrier
00:00:20
Speaker
hopefully... Busy old week, hasn't it? Yeah, hopefully we can there we can bring some bring some life back into it with some some more toxic traits. and So if you didn't listen to last week's podcast, check it out and because we went through and basically things that that people sort of automatically fall into like toxic like mentality things that people fall into and that aren't like drinking drugs, et cetera.
00:00:48
Speaker
Do you remember where we got to? I do, yeah. We promised didn't we, we'd do a part two. yeah So hopefully we didn't do all the best ones last week. um There's still some some interesting ones on here. um So if we pick up where we were, um we did announce a few of these, but we didn't go into them. So you use perfectionism as an excuse not to begin. yeah okay so definitely definitely can be a like guilty of this so um so like this week um i started like a content club course just to like learn more about like for my own like for my own education really but like i've definitely felt this week like i haven't really wanted to concentrate on my content because i've been like i want to get it perfect and i can't really i don't really feel like i can until i finish the course so
00:01:36
Speaker
I mean, I guess when you're in a service based business as well or in in your business, it would be very easy for you to just completely like. sweat the small stuff before sending out projects to a customer. Absolutely. um There is, it's probably the reason why a lot of the work we do, we don't end up being profitable on because you can end up spending so much time obsessing. But I look at that with a long term view that you get it right, even if, you know, it's the same when you actually break down.
Balancing Quality and Criticism
00:02:07
Speaker
I said, I've said this before, but if I broke down my hourly,
00:02:10
Speaker
but hourly wage if you like that I pay myself, then a lot of the time it's ah it's pretty terrible and it's not a great way of running a business to do that. However, I look at it and I think, well, if we do really good work and we've got it as close to affection as possible, then that long term will have a bigger impact. So that's the way I try and do it. but Even sometimes, I could keep fiddling around with this. I keep placing things and redoing it. Sometimes it just needs to go. Get the feedback and go from there. yeah um But yeah, it's a challenge. It's something I have to contend with every day. Yeah, I can imagine. When you're in a design-based business, it's all about how things look. Yeah. yeah What you've got to remember is that your eye is going to be different to...
00:02:52
Speaker
whatever that business's customer is. Yeah. And the other thing is that you're always trying to deliver to a particular, you know, you're kind of thinking of the very top taste. A lot of people don't don't care, just don't have that. So youre you feel like you're trying to appease, you know, 1% as opposed to probably 99%. Yeah. I mean, you're obsessed with like, with like learning and like content and stuff. So your standards are going to be way higher than potential customer that just wants like a few posts per out for yeah ah per week.
Adapting to Content Trends
00:03:25
Speaker
And then I look as well at stuff we did, you know, six months, a year ago, and I sort of, I can be really critical of it, but it was, you know, people liked what we did and it did the job, but then because I guess you move on and you there's new things and new ideas, you,
00:03:39
Speaker
you then look back and think, oh, I would do that now. Yeah. I mean, I'm the exact same. Like if I go through my content, I'm like, how on earth, like how on earth do you have any clients? Yeah. But then I'm like, well, I've been paying the bills now for a while. Like it must be doing something right. I think that's just the, it's a good thing, isn't it? If you went, but if you looked back and forth, well, this is absolutely fine. Yeah. Yeah. Eventually, it's all gonna go wrong. Yeah, there's a fine line between being overly critical but also holding yourself to a account and trying to push yourself in whatever you're doing. I think um Yeah, as long as you sit somewhere in the middle and you're not too two far one end. I think trends change as well, don't they? So like even for like Instagram, for example, some stuff that's really ugly does really well.
00:04:25
Speaker
Yeah, this one. Which you hate. This one, like videos with just text overlays. Yeah. That look. Awful. It's very basic. Yeah. But they're very easy to consume, very easy to watch. Yeah. And they do the job. So yeah, they work. But for a design perspective, I look at them and I think, oh, there's all sorts of colours going on. Yeah. You can't really quite see the video in the background that well, you know. So if yeah, from a design perspective, it can be can we tough to sort of get on board with some of those things. I
Building Social Media from Scratch
00:04:52
Speaker
definitely make them. and Yeah, they see you all over the trends. Yeah, and um they do kill me a little bit inside because sometimes I'm like
00:05:01
Speaker
I don't know. I guess sometimes I'm like, oh, I wouldn't watch this, which is pretty, like alarm bells are probably ringing there, but people like them. People do that, don't they? Yeah. um And you are right. Like sometimes I'm like, Oh God, you can't really read the text here, but people do like them. But I do think they're starting to go a little bit. Yeah. Yeah. I think the go to like the text overlay, then go to caption. I think they're starting to go. Yeah. and Like this year, I've definitely, like to start with this year, I was getting loads of new followers from them. yeah But I don't think people can be bothered to read the caption anymore. People wise up, don't they? Yeah. I've seen a lot where people are now going back to doing the sort of ASMR type things, the whisper or something, a sound that gets your attention. So that's obviously where the attention sort of moved to now. um Yeah, it's hard, isn't it? Because just when people start to get on board with another sort of trend, it switches and it sort of keeps you on your toes with social media.
00:05:55
Speaker
But yeah, as I say, for um for a lot of our clients, you're sort of, without sounding horrible, you're starting from quite a low point often. Yeah, they're not posting at all. Yeah. Yeah. Or if they are, it's very sporadic, it's inconsistent, there's no kind of brand identity. So we end up almost starting from the very beginning with that, sort of putting the foundations in place. And if you do that, then it makes it much easier if they ever take that back on themselves, so if they got the kind of a brand kit. Yeah. So, yeah, there's um there's a bit of a kind of legacy with what we do as well, which is which is nice. Yeah, I guess you've got to think like, is what I'm doing now better than what was done before, yeah even if it isn't perfect. Yeah.
Perfectionism in Personal Life
00:06:37
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Huge one there. And I feel i think like I try to relate this to like people that aren't in our world. Perfectionism. How like how else can we relate that?
00:06:48
Speaker
I guess it could be like the way you look. Yeah. and I know like some people don't want to go out unless they've got like, you know, face full of makeup or like wearing a certain type of clothing, brands. People might be really healthy and lead a healthy lifestyle, be classed as healthy. even maybe be quite fit, but they might their body might not be exactly where they want it to be. yeah So they then they don't go to the pool, they don't go to the beach. Such a good shout. When actually, you know, they don't have anything to be ashamed of, but in their own mind, they're not perfect or their version of perfect, so they don't, they sort of hide themselves away. This is such a common thing. I mean, I've been guilty of that. saying And I've been guilty of that since I've been in shape as well. But the problem is, like, I don't know about for you, but the problem is, like, for me, the better shape I got in,
00:07:33
Speaker
the more like my standards would go up. So like when I was 17 stone, I was like, oh, I'd do n anything to be 14 stone. And then I got to like 14 stone and I'm like, oh. you know, I want to do this next. Or like, oh, i want I want bigger arms. I want abs. I want to look like Chris Bumps did. And it gets to the point where like, the things you want are no longer achievable. Like 14 stone. Yes, totally achievable. But looking like Mike Thurston or someone like that. you Not happening. Perfectly cut. But there's reasons some of these people look like that. So for anyone listening, it's not it's not all just a gym and good diet. No. Extra curricular activities. Yeah. so But it is hard, isn't it? because
00:08:14
Speaker
you're surrounded but you see these things all the time and then it plants it plants that seed in your mind and then you're comparing yourself and comparing yourself to a better version of yourself from another point and all these things so yeah the thing is as well is that goals have got you to the point that you were like for me i was like oh we're gonna get to 14 stone it was that goal that got me there yeah so i'd set myself a new one at some point I can't, it can't be the way I look anymore because there's not that much more I can do yeah without like massive sacrifice. Performance has been a huge one for me and that's something I try and push for. yeah Push for clients up like at a point where they're like, oh, I don't want to diet anymore. I'm like, right, let's get good at something else. And with performance, you can go on forever. Yes. Yeah, exactly. Very true. um
00:09:02
Speaker
You're scared to make mistakes and risk looking foolish. Did we not do this one? Did we do that one? Maybe we did. We didn't put a spike through it. I feel like we might have done that. Sounds familiar. Okay. Well, I was just testing you. You passed. Okay. You don't manage your time or your tasks. I am quite good at this. Yeah, you are actually. Yeah. I definitely think you're good at this.
Time Management and Themed Days
00:09:24
Speaker
Your day seems to run pretty like pretty much clockwork. it's It comes from like a insecurity thing of like, just cause I hate, I'm i'm really paranoid of like forgetting something. And and if somebody's listening to this, like I'll i'll forget like to go shopping or something like that. But like things where I'm like, I always have this thing, right? i Imagine if a new client started with me and I forgot to set them up. I've got this like paranoia about that. and So like with work stuff, i just I just like having a schedule. I do that thing as well where like,
00:09:58
Speaker
um Like say I've got a call booked for the end of the day, like with a client, I just cannot relax until the evening. Yeah, same. Yeah. And for for some reason, people always want to book them in in the afternoon. Yeah. I always have calls after two o'clock, it seems. Yeah. So you can't relax. yeah and But yeah. from so like someone who I just could not concentrate when I was a kid. like And I said before, I i think I might have like undiagnosed ADHD or something. I just never, like at school, I just couldn't apply myself. I was easily distracted. So I use a lot of like planning and stuff to make sure I get myself. So do you do you look at your your day, for example, like most normal days? is it Do you try to block out time for certain tasks? So I'm actually about to go through ah like a re-jigging of this because I haven't been
00:10:50
Speaker
Allowing enough time for certain things and like haven't been for mainly content. and I know like we've already spoke about this, but I think I need to put more More time into it. So I don't know if we really we've probably already covered it like overthinking Yeah, but that's gonna take far too long. So I just haven't planned for it. Yeah, um So yeah, I have like themed days so like Tuesdays like from a coaching perspective like Mondays and I do most of my check-ins, Tuesdays I do most of my programs, yeah Wednesdays I'll do like content, Thursdays I try to do like more like client calls, and Fridays, whatever's left basically. And do you do you ah like sort of leave yourself enough time in those blocks? Yeah, if anything that's something that I can
00:11:43
Speaker
like almost allow more. So like certain things like quiet, I do have quieter weeks. Like if I haven't got a lot of calls, maybe I could be booked in like a little bit more productive with that time. And it's not like I'm not doing anything. It's like I'm sitting there trying to work, but not actually yeah being hugely productive. so What I've tried to do before and I was actually tempted to because I saw on YouTube this girl who she's like a content creator and she's a doctor and she paid someone on Fiverr yeah to do her
00:12:16
Speaker
Google Calendar for like a month. So she told this girl all of her shifts. She told her when she wanted to make YouTube videos, when she wanted to edit them, and she just was like, make my Google Calendar. And then she just used
Debating Outsourcing for Productivity
00:12:30
Speaker
it. And she stuck to it because of the accountability. And I was thinking, it was a tenner. And I was like, that could potentially help me because deep down, I know that I'm setting my own calendar up. And you make excuses for things. and Well, like, for example, i I started it up the other day and i'm I'm like, I'm not totally sure how I want it, how I'm going to finish it yet. But like, I put like, when I'm going to walk the dog on there. And for me, I'm like, if I'm not going to walk the dog at eight, I'll walk him at nine. Like it's not a big deal, but I think subconsciously, potentially, if someone set up my calendar, I can be like,
00:13:05
Speaker
No, I'm following it. You might find that actually you've gained yeah a whole load of time as well. Because I can get quite obsessive over a certain things. Yeah. And I think that might be one thing where I could be like quite obsessive over. Yeah. Yeah, it's really it's really tricky because I find my days have to try and i have to try and be quite fluid with them. Yeah. um Mainly because you spend a lot of time meeting people and on the phone to people, but usually working around so what works best for them. and And yeah, I've just find I'm always, I seem to always be in the car on the way somewhere. yeah So, and that's ah that's a real annoying one for me, is travel time. Sometimes you can, especially during, obviously we're on school holidays now. So I find in the morning it can take me half an hour to get in on a good day, or nearly an hour. yeah And that's just loft time. So I can't really account for that. But if I allowed an hour every day, I'd have time where I could be doing stuff almost,
00:14:02
Speaker
Do you know what I mean? And so I sort of have to just go with it a little bit. Yeah. So if you set yourself half an hour, you're already going to be late. Yes, exactly. So if I had said to myself, I will be there at that time and I will start that task then from the start of the day, I might be on the back foot. So when you worked like retail, how early did you leave when you had to be at work? I always used to probably allow about a 20-minute sort buffer, right I guess. And trust me, there were some times where I'd be walking in trying to walk slowly because I didn't want to just get there and before I needed to. It's always a so psychological thing. You don't want to be at work before you should be at work. No, I'm not going but go to give them any more minutes than they deserve. yeah um
00:14:45
Speaker
But then there'd also be times where I'd leave the same time and for whatever reason, you know, row clothes somewhere or something. pages And then it'd be am massive like a massive rush. So yeah, that was one thing which I just used to hate, was knowing that I had to be somewhere at a certain time. feeling like, again, it's not in my control. I have to be there at that time and I can't control all the variables. yeah Whereas now at least, if I say I'm going to be at a meeting with someone, I will be and subconsciously I make sure I'm always there. But it's not like I have to literally be standing inside the door, like clocking in, yeah you know, in the same way, which helps. Do you think you can ever get to a point where you have certain days where like I meet clients on a Monday?
00:15:29
Speaker
Oh, absolutely. I hope so. Because then you could be like, yeah I can do my deep work on a Wednesday. I hope so. I mean, you know, hopefully as soon as possible, I can take myself out the workflow more, more and more. And and then you dedicate more of that time to, you know, driving the overall operation and yeah almost like a kind of business development manager type role. That's what that's what you want to get to. but at the moment just not quite there yet. So yeah, I end up having to work around client deadlines, client calendars for when they're free. And because we work with such a mix of people, like if you're working in one industry, it might make it a little bit easier. You'd always know people are good between say nine and five or after five, whatever it might be.
00:16:12
Speaker
But yeah, it's such a diverse mix. Yeah, some people are working like nine to five and then business afterwards. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, no, I'm, I think for me, if I, you know, when I think about that, um, I think I manage my time quite well, but I guess there's always because it is a bit more fluid, there's then more chance for it to feel like um I think I can overwork, you know, there's there's not clear cutoff times for things. Where if I knew I had a structure and I blocked things out, it'd get to a certain time and I'd probably have to switch off because I'd sort of know that's routine. I don't have that yet. That's something I need to do. You need to schedule your time out.
00:16:51
Speaker
like you need like your diary and be like this is when I'm doing something just for me and then you'll be able to relax more in those moments yeah yeah you are right right I'm gonna write that down now I'm gonna make that clear someone said that to me once um
Handling Distractions and Discipline
00:17:02
Speaker
it was like a like a webinar I watched and I was like yeah that is that is really true and I've been okay at sticking to it yeah um I think I normally manage my time better when I'm more busy yes So like, same what is that what is that saying? and It's something's law, isn't it? Where something will take as long as how much time you've dedicated to it. I've definitely noticed that. So like, sometimes I've got loads of stuff to do on a Friday before I come here. I have to leave to come here at half three. Yeah, in the rain. Yeah, it hasn't rained yet. It's not raining today, but it's probably getting ready too, right? Yeah, it's probably in the rain. Sometimes I've got loads of stuff to do and I'll get it all done.
00:17:45
Speaker
but like on a like a Thursday it's like because you know you've got to leave it three days yeah yeah yeah and normally on a Friday I train twice as well so I got up this morning and went to the gym went for a run at half eleven still got everything done and made it here but like it could be a Thursday I have the same amount of work and I'll be working till like seven yeah so yeah that's On that note then, so this is another one which maybe you're guilty of, maybe you're not, you lack discipline with certain things and get distracted easily. I definitely get distracted easily. Yeah. Yeah. Badly. Yeah. Do you find though, because I find this an interesting one. When I read that, it sounds like it's a really negative thing as in, you know, you're just watching and you're gaming or something like that, you know, when you say, but actually I end up going down rabbit holes where
00:18:38
Speaker
I could justify yeah watching that because it has a purpose yeah and sort of loosely speaking it would help what I'm trying to achieve but it's probably not the best use of that time at that moment. yeah yeah So they've done studies and stuff haven't they where like it takes you a certain amount of time to get back into something so like say you could be writing something and you got distracted by your phone yeah but it was like a reel that was about writing you might think, well, that's helped me, but it can take you like 15 minutes to get back into like the yeah concentration. So yeah. ah That's definitely true. I've, all the time, I'm so easily distracted. Like like if I have to, if I'm gonna write anything, it's like noise canceling headphones, like me and Zoe sharing office, like yeah check-ins, I just can't have her in there.
Impact of Authority on Work Ethic
00:19:28
Speaker
And she's not even doing anything. The dog as well, is she? No, it's not too bad yeah actually.
00:19:34
Speaker
But so he just being there, I don't know why I'm just like, I'll just be like, Oh, just talk to her about something. Yeah. But that's probably why I was so bad at school. Like there was no, like talking to your mates was fun, wasn't it? Yeah. So yeah, I was just too scared of authority. So in class, I was just scared of consequences all the time. Really? Yeah. I was that kid who just never wanted to, do you want to get in trouble? Yeah, but it's to a ridiculous level, like, even if I wasn't very well, a lot of kids hello a lot of kids would have just had the day off. Or, you know, I've got a cold or whatever, I'm not well enough. I'd be thinking, no, I need to go in because I don't want my attendance to not be 100% and stuff like that. Oh my God. Just really worry about everything to do with that sort of school environment and the, you know, sort of authority, I guess. I don't know why. Yeah, I never- Because ah when I left school, I realised none of it was a lot of it, just, why don't worry about that, yeah. Yeah.
00:20:31
Speaker
ah And things like, um I don't think I ever didn't do a homework task. when it needs to be done. And other people used to come in and just go like, oh yeah, I forgot it. And there was never really any consequence. no But I was terrified by that. Like I would panic if, even if I'd genuinely forgotten something had to be in the next day, I'd be up to the early hours when I was probably about 12 or 13 doing it. Yeah, I know. But it was an, it's a thing. Well, it actually it's good because it's ah an inner, it's like an inner feeling of responsibility. yeah
00:21:04
Speaker
which is why I don't leave work now until it's done. yeah So I met a client and actually, well not a client, a potential client um this morning and we were having a chat, we might be working with them on their website and we're just talking about how things have been and the reason that we're having the chat is because the current kind of provider and he's been working on the website is just let him down. yeah It never gets back to him, never does the changes and he was saying to me, I've been quite accommodating So he was talking about the relationship. I said, hang on, you you pay them for this, right? And you're being accommodating. And he was like, yeah, I mean, I know that the guy had a lot going on and all this, like, no, no, you're paying for a service and you've not been getting it. And he's being accommodating. Yeah. And I don't go home. And I actually said to him, I don't go home until that that that needs to be if it's if you've asked for it that day, it gets done. Yeah.
00:21:58
Speaker
because it's important to your business, it's important to you, and and it's important to me. And so that's come from that's just stuck with me, I guess. I've always had that. He should go with you, mate.
Societal Influence on Decision Making
00:22:11
Speaker
Well, hopefully he will. But you know that's what I say. It's not something I'm kind of consciously thinking all the time. It's just built into me. yeah to It's like a diligence, I think. Yeah, it didn't come naturally for me. Yeah. I wasn't like, I wasn't like naughty. Like, you know, some kids would like swear at the teacher and stuff. I was just like, lazy and negligent. But you liked, and you also liked that kind of social aspect. Yeah. Yeah. I always wanted to genuinely forgot to do it. Yeah.
00:22:41
Speaker
Not anymore though. But it's probably because for whatever reason, it just didn't hold that much importance to you. that's the That's the thing. I'm terrible at doing things I don't enjoy. Yeah. If I said to you now, um ah if I sort of sprung on you that you were going to be running ah half marathon and you've got X amount of time, you would start training. You'd start doing something with you. have a yeah You'd be excited for it and therefore, and you'd want to set you know PB and all that stuff. So you'd you'd work for it. But I guess that's the thing at school, a lot of kids, you realise they weren't interested, they didn't want to be there, and therefore they couldn't apply themselves. Yeah. And that gets punished, doesn't it? With school, something I was thinking about the other day was like, there's a very, there's like a, it's kind of cool not to like school, isn't it, as well? Yeah. That must feed into kids. Yeah. I swear my dad, like, be like, a so like my lit like
00:23:32
Speaker
ah so like hearing my dad say that he didn't like school and stuff. Yeah. um I'm going to tell my kids I love school. Oh, it's so good. Yeah. Just let them make their own mind. I see. I was always of the impression that everyone's parents told them that school was good and school was important. But yeah, as you grow up, you realize that's definitely not the case. No. I was told it was important. Yeah. but people would tell me they wouldn't like it and I'd be like, yeah, well, I'm on that. Yeah. Okay. Next. Okay. That's an interesting one. Um, so you know what you want to do rather than what you know, you should do. Is that something you fall into the trap of? I don't know if I understand that. So what you want to do rather than what you should do. Yeah. I mean,
00:24:27
Speaker
I do both. Yeah? Yeah. I i try to i tried to like... That's that one done. Yeah. i try I guess I try to like, if there's something that's not genuinely productive, I'm lucky because I enjoy what I do. Yeah. oh that's I think that's the one for that, isn't it? That makes a difference. Yeah. So if there's something that's not, I don't know, if I wanted to play a game or something, I'd be like, right, you can play the game when you've done what you need to do. Yeah. It's not a great one, let's move on. yeah um Okay, you allow the opinions of others to dictate what you do.
00:25:07
Speaker
I mean, sometimes. I mean, everyone does, don't they? Yeah, we're all guilty of this. but Like, people care about what people think. Yeah. Full stop. Whether you're the most headstrong person. Yeah. you will have like You will be influenced in some way. I think that comes because if you go back long enough, then we were part of tribes when we were part of groups. And there was always a thing of having to fit in, wasn't there? And you didn't want to be the outsider, right? Because in the past, you'd have been shunned and left to kind of perish. So I guess, inherently there's something in it that makes us want to fit in and conform yeah with the rest of the group yeah or be accepted by people. So yeah, I don't think that's something you can really escape from. I'm definitely quite easily influenced. I think that's why it's been so important for me to have like, like to do courses and be part of a mentorship and like have people that not only like, because I could respect someone and they tell me something that's completely rubbish and I might be influenced by that. Yeah. Or that something they're not, they don't know about.
00:26:08
Speaker
But while I'm but i haveve like um but i'm doing like some kind of education, I've got someone that I can communicate with that I respect and knows what I'm trying to do, then that's going to be the positive thing for me. Yeah, I think.
00:26:25
Speaker
I think I fall into this trap a lot. ah ah cause I would class myself as a people pleaser. Yeah, probably the same. And therefore, yeah, if you're a people pleaser, then you're always you're always kind of thinking and worried about this kind of type of thing. because a lot of the time you're thinking, oh, have I said the right thing to that person? ah sort of You end up getting in your head, don't you, about it. ye Were they okay with how I said that or what I said? Because I don't want them to think badly or I don't want them to have taken it the wrong way and all that sort of stuff. So naturally you are then thinking about their opinions all the time.
00:27:00
Speaker
yeah Yeah. It's a tough one. Yeah. It's draining. Again, I think it's kind of, it's kind of not, like it's not the worst quality to have. No, no, no, definitely not. No. Um, and again, when you're in a service based role, it's really important. Yeah. You have to be able to take on board people's opinions yeah and acknowledge their opinions. Otherwise you're probably not going to give the best i to give a good service. You're not going to give them what they want. Yeah. Yeah. Okay, anything else to... and I don't think so with that one. Yeah, we're flying through it today. We are.
Resilience and Learning from Feedback
00:27:36
Speaker
You know what, I think we've actually got through all of the ones that were left. Yeah, the only one which I can't remember if we talked about last week or not.
00:27:45
Speaker
you You get knocked down easily and struggle to want to get back up. no i don't think That's neither of us though. If anything I like to sort of get knocked down. always getting knocked down yeah da it's my life yeah um I think on that one, when I was younger I used to take things to heart a lot more. yeah and Yeah, so it feeds into the other one, doesn't it? If someone said something or I felt like I hadn't done something to someone's and met someone's um expectations, I'd be upset about it and worry about it. Whereas is now, it's like move on to the next thing and sort of prove yourself again.
00:28:25
Speaker
you Do you ever get that now? Like, cause I still get blindsided by certain things now. So like someone will say something or I've, I'll realize like, I dunno, maybe it would be like a, like a really negative interaction I'll have with someone and it will bother me still. Yeah, I'm sure that, yeah, it does happen. Um, I think it helps when you're so busy and you've got so many plates you're spinning in a way. It means I don't feel like I ever can get too hung up on things. so True. No. um To be fair, like if you're going to work for yourself, you you have to build that. You wouldn't have gotten this far. Yeah. I mean, early on, you know, 18 months ago, we were, you know, you'd be going out and basically talking to people and trying to pitch yourself and put yourself out there. And whoop there was
00:29:14
Speaker
you know, lots of people would almost look at you kind of like, oh, well, what's your experience in this and all that sort of stuff. And some people would just say it to you like, oh, well, to be honest. Yeah. Yeah. We're going to go with someone and that was quite hard to take because think, well, hang on, you only give me a chance. But if someone said that to me now, I'd just go, okay, well, that's fine, that's your perspective. yeah I've done all I can. If that doesn't meet your expectations, that's fine. Yeah, you've said you've said that quite a few times to me, like about certain clients and stuff. yeah um But it did it wasn't easy to start, but it's had I've had to get better at it. Yeah. Yeah, it's the same for me, definitely.
00:29:54
Speaker
Yeah, because you must you must have people who who have been working with you. And then when, you know, they decide they want to leave or whatever, or it can be like, I think I think people it'd be very easy for me to be like, oh I've got 100% success rate. Yeah. obviously I don't. So there's like some people that get started and they don't don't make any progress. And I'm not gonna sit there and blame them only because there's obviously there's always room for improvement in my position. But like, and that was way harder when I first started. yeah Like if someone started, you know and they were like a first one of one of my first like 10 clients or something and they didn't get the result, obviously I took that incredibly personally.
00:30:39
Speaker
because you like it is a reflection of your work. you Yeah. And you're like, not only that, you're like, well, why anyone ever like. I don't know, they've seen through, they've seen the real me. You then go to that extreme thing of, why would anyone ever work with me again, don't you? Yeah, yeah, yeah. See, I don't think I'm as strong as that, because I know you've said that before. You would have those voices, don't you almost say, like, oh, you know, no one's ever going to even contact you again, sort of thing. But I've had it before where we've worked with clients, and when you set everything out,
00:31:10
Speaker
and you reflect on it, the conditions were never there to achieve what was required. And I guess the learn from it is then when you onboard somebody or you're first having the initial discussions, you ask certain questions and you get certain commitments so that it's a two-way kind of collaboration as opposed to we're just providing this for
Reflecting on Client Relationships
00:31:30
Speaker
you. because early on we had feedback from one customer, I don't mind saying, who said, oh, you've over promised and under delivered. That was their words. I can hand on heart say we over delivered for them. Yeah. The hours we put in, the content was really, really good. But whatever her expectations were and what she was expecting to get from it were
00:31:54
Speaker
We hadn't, we weren't aligned on that yet. And we hadn't asked enough questions. That was our mistake. We hadn't asked enough questions at the start to set everything out in order to get, you know, make sure that relationship was going to blossom. Yeah. um And it's one I look back on now and I'm just glad we're not working with that person because some of their morals, some of the things they want to do and some of the corners they want to cut to try and elevate, you know, their online presence. I don't want to work with people like that anyway. Yeah. So, But what we did next time is we we kind of, we dissected it and we went right. Next time we sit down with someone, we're going to that and they're going to make, they're going to have to commit to that. And it's going to be over this term and all those sorts of things. But yeah, that's just experience as well. I think some of those things. Yeah. Yeah.
Concluding Reflections and Listener Engagement
00:32:43
Speaker
Um, but as I say, I think getting better with those things, but getting better at dealing with knockbacks, setbacks, little rejections here and there.
00:32:51
Speaker
Yeah, they happen all the time. Yeah. And it's normally not as big as you think of it. And if it's really negative, it's normally a them thing. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, cool. Short and sweet. Quite a positive way to end that. Yeah. A bit of reflection there. If anyone else listening has got any that they would like to share with us. Yeah, you can include the... Go for it, yeah. The other ones as well if you want. Yeah. the um other toxic traits that we see in like everyday life. yeah and So anything else to add, mate? No, I don't think so. I'm now looking forward to finishing quite soon and enjoying the weekend. Early one for you, mate, five to six. Yeah, hopefully. is That's if something doesn't come in in the next four or five minutes. You've got to finish it before you go home. Yeah, exactly. Cool. I'll be here still till Monday then. Nice. See everyone next week. See you later.