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The Ruling Class - Pt 1
64 Plays8 months ago
The Fixer, Maeve, and Calamity are on their way to a once-in-a-lifetime event: the coronation of Lexii the 7th, Empress of the Brinese system! But with SnackEms throwing the celebration, anything goes...
Join Brand Osorio, Cate MacCoyne, and Pandora Beatrix, along with GM Casey Jones as Team TARDIS faces off with the High and Mighty in the Ruling Class!
And stick around for interviews with the players! Your ears are in for a treat! If you'd like to run a game of D&D or Doctor Who of your very own, find Casey on StartPlaying!
Come say hi on our Discord! Be sure to subscribe and leave a question or comment! Don't forget to follow us on Twitter and BlueSky for more updates!
Send your questions and fan art to [email protected]!
Music by Tabletop AudioTheme by RJ Pirchinello
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Zencastr Discount: anywherebutnow
With tabletop gaming as a storytelling tool, the show features the Doctor Who roleplaying game from Cubicle 7, powered by the Vortex System, designed by David F. Chapman.
Game Originally Created by David F. Chapman
Addl. Game Writing by Will Brooks, Zak Dale-Clutterbuck, Eleanor Hingley, Andrew Peregrine, John Sewell, Chris Spivey
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Learn more about Cubicle7!
Website: https://cubicle7games.com/doctor-who-the-roleplaying-game-second-edition
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Transcript
Introduction to the Podcast
00:00:04
Speaker
time travel, sci-fi adventures, and risky rolls of the dice lie ahead. Hello and welcome to Anywhere But Now, a Doctor Who actual play podcast. I'm your host and GM, Casey Jones. The next hour and a half or so holds a thrilling adventure in time and space. So let's dive in.
Character Introductions
00:00:25
Speaker
With me is the daring crew of our time-traveling machine! Playing the Fixer is the charming and resourceful Bran DeSorio. Hello, Bran! Hello! And joining him is Maeve Sullivan, played by the ebullient Caden McCoyne. Welcome back, Caden! Hey there! Finishing the TARDIS team is Pandora Beatrix, as the delightfully chaotic Calamity Hap. Periscendice.
00:00:52
Speaker
Are you all excited? Do you feel that energy?
Special Guest: A.E. Jones
00:00:55
Speaker
I hope so, because we are joined today by a special guest star, A.E. Jones. Yo. Yo. We play with the second edition of Cubicle Seven's Doctor Who rule books.
Game Rules and Recording Setup
00:01:10
Speaker
House rules mean our players begin the game with five. Count them five story points each, so they're not empty handed, but don't have an embarrassment of riches either.
00:01:20
Speaker
Speaking of riches, we are playing today's game with the beautiful dice gifted to us by prismatic scales. These lovely math rocks are oh so pretty and they come in an amazing variety of colors. Some glow in the dark, others have a liquid core, and many of them even use snakeskin.
00:01:43
Speaker
They are all gorgeous and they can be yours on PrismaticScales.com. We are recording today's episode and every episode on Zencaster, an excellent resource for podcasters, both amateur and pro. And if you'd like a discount on your Zencaster membership, simply use the discount code anywhere but now, all one word. Link and details in the doobly-doo.
00:02:05
Speaker
Get ready for a collaborative, immersive storytelling experience and stick around after the game for interviews with the players.
00:02:14
Speaker
A bigger on the inside thank you to our listeners. Time is such a gift or it would not be the present. We thank you for spending yours with us. If you like
Community Engagement and Contact Information
00:02:25
Speaker
what you hear, leave a review, rate the show, and follow us on Blue Sky and Twitter at anywhere but now. Join us on Discord, share the show with your friends. Word of mouth is an unbelievably huge help.
00:02:38
Speaker
Have any questions or lovely fan art you want to share? Send them our way at anywherebutnowpodcastatgmail.com. And if you'd like me to run a game for you, find me on startplaying.games. Links to everything in the doobly-doo. Brought to you wherever you're listening in time and space. This is Anywhere But Now.
00:03:37
Speaker
We
Arrival at Zabar and Initial Adventures
00:03:38
Speaker
open on Zabar, the planet bazaar. The air is alive with exotic smells and the sounds of commerce. A sprawling marketplace of never-ending streets wend off in all directions, brimming with stalls, shops, exciting restaurants, kiosks, carts, and people.
00:03:58
Speaker
The TARDIS, your very own painted lacquered red clock shop, is parked neatly between just over the corner of time enough. You step out into the planet bazaar and have the run of the place. It is not just any day, however.
00:04:18
Speaker
You have arrived on the day of the coronation of Empress Lexi VII, to be crowned today as the Empress of the entire Bernese solar system brought to you by Snackums!
00:04:34
Speaker
It has been devised that showing up with some kind of celebratory gift for the Empress to be might be a nice icebreaker or palate cleanser, as Maeve, ever the intrepid reporter, has already been assigned to cover the coronation. I mean, do we have any idea what she likes? Great question, Calamity.
00:04:57
Speaker
You look around and quickly discover a large Snackems kiosk in the center of this particular hub where a holographic buffoon in a bespoke tinsel suit is casting out holographic candy to passers by and he's just guffawing. Snackems! I just love them!
00:05:22
Speaker
and they are celebrating the official crystallized pineapple of the Empress. It is her favorite treat, and little boxes and packets of the stuff are being sold at discount prices today of all days. But, I mean, we really want to buy from Snackums. I mean, I do have the card, so...
00:05:44
Speaker
Oh, you do? Calamity, you woke this morning to find your Snacom's gift card waiting on the nightstand along with a small stack of kerblam receipts. The TARDIS did not go overboard with its personal shopping, just picked up a few odds and ends for the ship, watch lubricant, spare drive shafts for the articulated quantum coordinator, and a half gross of self-sealing stem balls. Well, if it's store credit, we might as well use it.
00:06:11
Speaker
Maybe first we should stop by synthetic pets because I want to see what's there. And if we can't find anything anywhere else, maybe we can put together a bespoke hologram for her. Yes, that's a great idea. Or we could get her like a little synthetic bird or something. She doesn't love a pet.
00:06:27
Speaker
In Bespoke Holograms, they have perfected the technology to don holographic jewelry. You can have a necklace of the stars. You can have a charm bracelet of your favorite portraits. You can have a tiara that fires off little holographic fireworks. Possibilities are nigh limitless. We could get her a bracelet with the pineapples on them. So she likes them so much.
00:06:54
Speaker
I feel like we should not overthink it, right? We should browse, and if we see something that just sparks our imagination, then we should just go, yes, that, right? That sounds good to me. Well, let's check out synthetic pets first.
00:07:07
Speaker
You head into synthetic pets where an array of clockwork birds cheap and chirp on their little stands and cages and little rubber-coated lizards and amphibians that you don't have to feed or clean up after splash in tiny little ponds and make noise.
00:07:31
Speaker
Hanging on a chandelier overhead is an entire boa slithering around and glowing. Fix it. Do you know what the TARDIS needs? It needs one of those, the snake. A lamp snake.
00:07:46
Speaker
You know, I don't think I've ever encountered a lamp snake in the wild before. Excellent idea. I don't think it needs bed, but if it does, I will feed it. And I'm pretty sure it's just a robot. So we could just get it. I assume they take batteries or something. You could feed it the batteries. I'll take care of the batteries.
00:08:05
Speaker
The shopkeep gets on a little stepping stool, takes out a custom cloth bag and takes out a handful of battery cells and drops them on a tray and the snake above slithers along and shines a little brighter as it coils around the chandelier box. I am going to give the fixer the biggest pair of puppy dog eyes I can summon.
00:08:31
Speaker
I'd like to quickly check and make sure that if its sentience level is above a certain robotic level, it's not being enslaved. But hey, okay, let's do this. Pull out the sonic, give it a quick scan. The robot snake is not sentient. The synthetic snake is just enjoying its route around the chandelier above without a complaint. One snake, my good shopkeep! Oh, right away, sir!
00:08:56
Speaker
as you leave with your own kit shaped like an upside down Christmas tree, coning down to a point that you carry in your hands. And inside is the conical frame that you can hang. This is the best bazaar I have ever been to.
00:09:11
Speaker
The auditor steps out of sub-zero dining, brushing some frost off of his shoulders, and shook-a-shooking a new packet of freeze-dried walnuts, and says, oh my yes, there's no bazaar like planet Zabah. This is just an absolute wonderful place to come, to see, to be. He looks around. Calamity, didn't you start a church here? Didn't you start a shrine of serendipity here?
00:09:39
Speaker
Well, I mean, we brought a bunch of people here that I had indoctrinated and then let them go, so maybe? That's usually how a religion starts. It'd be good to see them again.
00:09:50
Speaker
Yes, if they're still here, it is the nature of serendipitists to be mobile, but usually having some place to go back to to sleep and get medical attention is helpful. So hopefully they're still here somewhere, at least some of them.
Character Moments and Reflections
00:10:06
Speaker
Hopefully. This is not the entire bazaar. The shrine of serendipity could indeed be thriving somewhere, perhaps closer to a parking lot. Who knows? I think we should name the snake George. George is a perfect name for a snake.
00:10:19
Speaker
George, it's Snake. How do you like that name, George? He loves it. George appears to love it. Okay. Alright, so we need a gift. You said you wanted to go to the hologram store?
00:10:33
Speaker
Well, only if we don't find anything else that jumps out at us. In a fun way. Is there a non-fun way for things to jump out at you? A jack-in-the-box carton from Snackums fires out of a spring-loaded candy cannon up the street and you hear the buffoonish laughter of their hologram man. My, that's off-putting.
00:10:58
Speaker
i don't like it she's totally like it more snacks should be ballistic i mean what do you want a snack that just sits there i mean when it can be flying through the air majestically but it could be like ballistic after you swallow it and then you die there there are limits obviously to to how much fun you can survive
00:11:22
Speaker
Do not approach maximum levels of fun unless you have consulted your physician. Low funds to mobility. Fixer, you smell the most delectable savory and sweet fondues emerging from molten cuisine, which has a temperature controlling force field insulating it from next door, which is sub-zero dining.
00:11:48
Speaker
This place smells amazing. Between the candy, the fondue, oh my. If we weren't going to an event later, I'd say let's hit every restaurant here. The auditor nods along. Well, that is one of the advantages of having your own time machine. You can always arrive just before the afternoon lunch rush. Oh, that is nice. Let's also keep an eye out for old friends. We've dropped off more than just calamity's posse on this place.
00:12:18
Speaker
You don't see any signs of Tripshine, but that doesn't mean that he hasn't been busy, you know? Chronologically, that did take place before your arrival at this place in time, but Tripshine's whereabouts are presently unknown.
00:12:36
Speaker
I'll brighten up for a moment, and then when I look around and realize he's not there, just get a little bit sad. Is the rocket stall visually apparent? Yes. I mean, if it's on the map, you can see it. I mean, how can you sell rockets if you can't have someone come out and kick one of the fins to make sure that the fuel injectors, you know, don't fall out of the thing? So yeah, so Calamity is drifting in that direction.
00:13:02
Speaker
I'll get to you and I now fully wearing George Brittany style. Very nice. George has taken the hint and wends himself as a loose slithering scarf. He's such a good boy.
00:13:16
Speaker
Sadly, George is not a gadget. I did not prepare a gadget card for him. And other than adding very light illumination to any room he happens to inhabit, he is not going to be of terribly much use. You put pets on the map, and I am unfortunately drawn to them as a player, and I think Nate would be as well. Unfortunately, there's nothing unfortunate about that. I love a pet. Hopefully, George will not just bring us joy, but bring everybody joy.
00:13:46
Speaker
Snakes always look like they're smiling to me, so... So, shall we go to the rocket store calamity? Oh, yes. If other people are interested in that, that seems nice because they are useful things that people use for transportation and the fact that they explode sometimes is... Fun. Irrelevant. I've missed the calamity.
00:14:11
Speaker
situationally useful? Possibly. You enter Gib's Rockets and find a dealership that has a small array of toy-sized rockets that kids have that with their parents have been playing with, zooming and whizzing and flying all over the place. Gib stands up straight when he sees you find lovely bipeds stride into the store.
00:14:40
Speaker
Welcome to Gibbs! How can I help you five people today? Do you have any rockets that don't work great? Link, he said. Well, if I did, they'd be on quite a mark-down for sale. That seems reasonable. See, I have a hobby of testing damaged equipment.
00:15:00
Speaker
Fascinating. And he glances from side to side to see if you're being serious and when there is no sign of insincerity. I mean, she is smiling continuously, but... And he says, I'm sure we have some secondhand propulsion systems out back that could more than meet your requirements. Step right this way, young lady, and she then gives you a wink.
00:15:27
Speaker
and walks you out into the lot of Gibbs rockets out back. The nearest ones to the entrance are the highest polished, the most pristine, the latest models of contained explosive devices. He says, now he's got your flash and your pizazz, the top of the line models, but a discerning customer like yourself can appreciate a fixer upper and
00:15:51
Speaker
He walks you past all the impressive models to a clunker barely held together in the back the size of a small Corvette and might sit two, three if someone sits on one of the other two's lap. Excellent. How do you measure the usage? How many parsecs does it have on it?
00:16:13
Speaker
Yeah, this baby has crossed through plenty of parsecs. This rocket has seen some things. There's one or two pock marks in the armored plating where a small meteorite may have bounced off it mid-flight, etc. George the snake regards the rocket. I'll get a little scratch out of the chin. Nothing a little tender loving care can't fix.
00:16:37
Speaker
Well, I mean, we don't even know if it needs fixing yet, right? We would want, I mean, ideally, you would find that out while you were using it, and then the fixing is more exciting, isn't it? Well said. It does not get more exciting than that. That does sound very exciting. If your options are fix it successfully or do not make orbit awkward, right? Gibb looks at you, blinks a couple times, and says, you're not a serendipitous, are you? I am, actually.
00:17:08
Speaker
there's a big shocker yeah okay and he pulls out a pad text just starts streaming on it and he's like these are the insurance policies we've had to take out for serendipitous they never have the best luck with our ships but yeah we have to take precautions
00:17:24
Speaker
Oh, so this is like liability insurance for other people. It's insurance for a lot of things. Okay, right. No, that's very fair. I will go ahead and sign it immediately. Should you read it first? Why? You're right. Just go ahead. It is a requirement for getting the rocket, and I want the rocket. So if I were to read something that would cause me to not sign it, that would mean I would not get the rocket. So, obviously... You make an excellent point.
00:17:52
Speaker
Calamity presses her thumb to the agreement stamp and you hear little rockets go off sound effects.
00:18:02
Speaker
Gibb looks at you and the rocket that he's just sold as one of the fins falls off. And he says, yeah, there's a kit bag for that. Hang on a second, let me rummage. And he starts, he just disappears into a shed and comes out with an extremely large carry case, a device that he has to smack a couple of times before your massive, dilapidated, third-hand rocket
00:18:33
Speaker
Collapses in on itself, dropping more pieces as it goes until it noisily crams itself into the carry taste that you can now cart behind you. Wow, that's great! What a wonderfully portable rocket!
00:18:47
Speaker
And it's lighter now. If you happen to make a new rocket out of any of the pieces that fell off, let me know. Yeah, no, those are supposed to come off. Those are decals. They're ablative decals. 100%. Well, thank you very much. This is excellent.
00:19:03
Speaker
Give a quick look down at the parts that have fallen, give a quick assessment for the value of those parts, and then turn to give and say, give my good man. Considering we're leaving these parts here, and there is a certain value to them, would we be able to trade that value forward towards a couple of those children's toy rockets? Just five of them. I was hoping we could modify them to fly in formation while streaming scented smoke behind them.
00:19:27
Speaker
Well, the good news is they will stream smoke, and it will smell like something, so you are gonna get your wish. Very ambitious. He hurriedly rushes you and just grabs five box rockets, dumps them in the auditor's hands, confusedly, up like, yeah, sure, no, absolutely, all sales are final. Thank you very much, have a nice day! Oh, this is so fun.
00:19:49
Speaker
I feel like we came ahead in that interaction. Yeah, the smell is probably going to be burned something. But if you put something into the fuel mix, then it should be burned that, right? So what were you thinking of exactly? Those pineapple candies. Oh! What a great idea! So it's like smoked pineapple. That's fine. That sounds great.
00:20:11
Speaker
Yeah, you are walking past the Garden of Eaton. They have a little rotating stand of different scents. Instead of food coloring, they have food flavoring that you can add to things. And they just happen to have a little pineapple-shaped bottle.
00:20:28
Speaker
Let's pick up enough of those so we can update all five of the toy rockets. You return to the TARDIS where your beautiful time machine has been humming patiently. A cathedral
Preparation and Arrival at the Coronation
00:20:41
Speaker
of plexiglass piping. The Fixer's TARDIS is lined with wall-to-wall tubes tunneling off in all directions.
00:20:49
Speaker
truly lived in. The humble time machine bears only the slightest of scuff marks here and there from boots digging in to dear life. The fixer's driving leaves a tad to be desired. The center console beats and clicks with activity practically champing at the bit. There is a surprised gluing gluing gluing as Calamity drags in the massive suitcase-sized thing that contains a rocket ship
00:21:18
Speaker
Mave your pocket reporter a deep a deets with updates so you get a profile piece on Lexi the seventh along with the entire Imperial family there are a handful of austere and
00:21:34
Speaker
serious-looking people behind this fresh-faced young woman in a tuxedo that talks about the Bernese imperial family. Species diversity amongst the Imperials. Brennan takes adoption as seriously as some planets and societies treat bloodlines. Vows of family fealty come before and above everything else. Like none of the people in the royal family
00:21:59
Speaker
are the same hue. Lexi is a nice burgundy. The woman off to spots down to her right is a lovely light blueberry. One of the gentlemen is a darker shade of gold, but you also get a check-in reminder. Your editor, who is very much looking forward to your latest piece
00:22:19
Speaker
on the coronation of Lexi the 7th. There is a familiar rattling in the pipes as the doctoral program dispatch foods out a tube containing a message for the fixer. Let's plop it open.
00:22:34
Speaker
Inside is a scroll unrolled. You have the doctoral program's thanks for your report on the Osirin homeworld, tracking it down and actually discovering where it is. Well done. And there's also an addendum. Seeing as you're headed for the Bernese coronation, the program high council not so gently reminds you
00:23:09
Speaker
Okay, so as I get halfway down reading this and I get to the point where they're talking about the OSIRON planet,
00:23:14
Speaker
immediately flash back to the Daleks, the smile drops from my face, my body tenses, and you can see a shake start running through me until I get to the next line about not interfering with the Royal Family.
00:23:28
Speaker
And when I get to that, I'm gonna laugh it all off. Oh, they don't want us to mess with the royal family. Of course we won't. You know, but this does, it's good to know this. Cause I was thinking about when we went to the bespoke holograms, maybe getting a piece of jewelry made for her that could announce that her coronation has been witnessed by the Time Lords of Gallifrey and especially recognized. But I think this clause here says we shouldn't.
00:23:52
Speaker
Ah, yeah, that does seem unwise. Are you alright? Yeah, yeah. Everything's fine. We're gonna have a fun time. We're gonna have a really fun time. It's gonna be a wonderful coronation. Well, that's always the goal. That is always the goal. The auditor rests a hand on the Fixer's shoulder and says, It's alright. You're here now. Among friends, you're safe. Everything's fine. You got away. We all did.
00:24:22
Speaker
Yep, we're safe, we're in a beautiful place, we're gonna have a great time. Brought to you by Snackums. Fixer, can we get an ingenuity and transport role from you to take us to that lovely planet beyond the stars? Maeve, this is something you can help with if you are still attempting to fly the TARDIS.
00:24:47
Speaker
Okay, this is also going to be ingenuity and transportation. Fixer, throw two points on for Time Lord. Maeve, you are at a disadvantage on this roll. And let us go ahead and let us know what you roll. The difficulty we're aiming for is 18. Eight typical Fixer takeoff with a one and a five on the dice for a total of 15. Okay, so I got two threes for 12.
00:25:14
Speaker
Maeve's averagest average helps us skirt out of the local time zone as the clock shop groans and wheezes and fades out of existence as the TARDIS takes off and flies into the vortex.
00:25:34
Speaker
With that one on the dice, you do manage to avoid hitting anything else in the tumbling vortex of time and space, and you do even manage to land the TARDIS where it is supposed to be, both geographically and vertically. You are
00:25:56
Speaker
an hour later than you expected to arrive. You were going to have something like three hours before the coronation, now you have something like two. Grab the boxes of the toy rockets from the auditor, begin opening them up right around the console area and start immediately modifying them so they can fly in formation and give those cloud streams.
00:26:20
Speaker
I think one of the reasons that the Fixer may be flying at less than 100% is he's distracted by the pineapple juice flavoring he can put into rocket fuel at his inclination. This is fine. Maeve's got it. Maeve's got it. This is fine. And steps away from the target.
00:26:41
Speaker
Yeah, and I'm painstakingly reading the steps off of a post-it note. So it's just like, step one, pull that thing. Has this always been here? Yes. Always. Since day one. Really? Really, really? Does this meant to spin like that? Is it meant to look like that? Or is it meant to be spinning the other way?
00:27:04
Speaker
Well, between you and me and the plexiglass walls, it's supposed to be spinning in the other direction. George, helpfully... It's probably fine. Probably fine.
00:27:14
Speaker
hang George's case across the side of the console, so he has a place always there. So, we do have another item to address with our lovely time-traveling crew. This is the fanciest of occasions. The coronation was referred to as the event of the decade.
00:27:37
Speaker
If you would all like to describe what you're going to be wearing to this fanciest of fancy occasions, the floor and the catwalk are yours. I'm happy to go first. So Calamity is going to have a modified version of her standard jumpsuit in that it is a jumpsuit, but it also has like a
00:28:03
Speaker
a three-quarter skirt attached to it so it goes down to the floor but it's open in the front so that the legs of the jumpsuit are visible and then all of the material of the garment is like is an active display so it just sort of has like a rotating a rotating set of I'm not sure it would depend I guess on what records the TARDIS has but like if there are there are actual like footage
00:28:30
Speaker
of, you know, stars exploding and... Well, I guess, like, you know, very large meteorites hitting planets that weren't inhabited. That, I mean, it would be in Portes, right? If they were inhabited. But yeah, basically just a bunch of scenes of extremely large-scale destruction rotating around her outfit at all times. That's magnificent.
00:28:57
Speaker
Maeve is wearing an outfit that is all black and white. And the top is kind of like a draped and molded top that leaves her shoulders bare. But then at the waist, it kind of parts almost completely. And she has a set of white pants beneath this black dress coat thing. And as always, Maeve, when it's fancy, will wear the very highest of heels. I love it. Love it. I absolutely love it. Oh, yes. Sorry. Calamity is wearing trainers.
00:29:27
Speaker
Of course. Love it. The auditor is wearing a fashionably cut tails tuxedo in deep aubergine. Time paisley patterning discreetly defines the jacket with walnut wood buttons on the black and gold patterned waistcoat and cufflinks. His pith helmet features a burgundy ribbon instead of the usual black to honor the coronation of Lexus. I have a fixer. What about your fine self? What is the fixer wearing to the coronation?
00:29:56
Speaker
Well, starting at the top, a collapsible white top hat with a cerulean blue band around it. And you'd notice that I'm sticking the control box for the rockets into the hidden pocket inside that top hat as I put the top hat on.
00:30:10
Speaker
an elegant gold corset with blue trim with an expensive looking white long coat over it. The long coat has muted gold buttons fastened over the corset so only the top of the corset peaks out and the long coat acts as a dress as well. Matching thigh-high white stiletto boots with a gold cap on the stiletto and a bright blue sole with of course a tool set strapped to each thigh.
00:30:36
Speaker
One with my usual tools on one side and one with the sonic stylus on the other. So they're hidden by the long coat for the view. And a gold watch chain ending in a golden blue pocket watch that doubles as a mirror. And you'll see me adjusting my gold lipstick and blue eyeliner in the mirror. My nails are done in gold with a blue accent nail on each hand. That's really nice. That's really, really nice.
00:31:00
Speaker
The TARDIS has landed. Your look, your glow up has been masterfully appointed. Well done. Fixer, can I get an ingenuity and transportation check from you as you are checking last looks as the TARDIS parks?
Coronation Security and Snackums Influence
00:31:21
Speaker
Absolute. Versus a difficulty of 12.
00:31:23
Speaker
We're looking at a one in a one with a total of nine. Yeah, the scanners go dead. The scanners go completely dead. You rush the knob to turn on the scanners and the words security lockout layer on the screen with a little emblem of the Bernese crown before the entire screen goes completely dead. Well, that's not supposed to happen.
00:31:50
Speaker
No, I don't think it was supposed to do that. Auditor, is there any way to... Is it because that thing was spinning the wrong way? I don't think it had to do with the spinning. He taps the screen and gets a spark.
00:32:04
Speaker
and sucks on his fingers like, yes, yes. And he taps a couple of keys in front of the screen. It looks like local security doesn't want anyone perceiving through the protective screen, I suppose. Dashed shame about our scanners there. We won't be able to get a closer look. He prides open the inner door of the TARDIS and peeks his head out and says, oh, well, we're in the right place at least.
00:32:33
Speaker
I believe Maeve deserves all the credit for that landing. Oh, did I do it right? You've been getting quite good at it, honestly. Yes, it's true. That's good. Quite adequate. The Fixer, I mean good. The Fixer's steering has been... Adequate is much better than where I started.
00:32:50
Speaker
Tech prevents me from agreeing with more enthusiasm. I imagine that Maeve has crashed this thing at least twice. Maeve's practice on the TARDIS
00:33:07
Speaker
console and the TARDIS intersystems in general is kind of like trying to forward upstream when the water is cold and distracting by a thousand other things. You've tried to internalize and memorize the opening sequence to kick things off and the wind down sequence to land and everything and every time it just goes
00:33:35
Speaker
In one eyeballing out the other, in one ear out the other, you would not pass a pop quiz. You would barely get through an open book test. And the print on the TARDIS manual is as fine as radio instructions. It's just impossibly tiny to make out.
00:33:55
Speaker
The Fixer steps out of the TARDIS onto an open lot that is decked with light cruisers, a few space yachts, and a personalized rocket in bright bubblegum pink. These are the personal transports of some very high rollers.
00:34:16
Speaker
a beautiful tower stretches into the sky, a single spire that tapers slowly to a glowing red point high above, and there is a shimmer
00:34:31
Speaker
in the air of force fields. Little hexagons shimmer up and into the sky and the fixer notices that the sheen goes off as far as he can see in either direction. A rather impressive security force field has been installed that completely encloses the Imperial Palace and most of the capital.
00:35:00
Speaker
What type of things does it look like this shielding would protect from?
00:35:19
Speaker
broadcast pirate signal off of the official coronation just to get static and a jamming signal. The force field also looks like from the Fixer's fairly trained eye that it would also stop weapons, concussive blasts, Lord knows what other kinds of offensive attacks, not that anyone here is expecting any of that as far as you know, but like the usual
00:35:49
Speaker
57th century precautions have been taken for the most important of the most important royal family of the entire solar system. Between the TARDIS and here is a security check. No one gets in without passing through security first. There is a privacy booth where people can, you know, remove
00:36:12
Speaker
anything that might be construed as a weapon or a scanner or a recording device that's not expected, blah, blah, blah, protects their privacy, but also ensures that nothing approximating a weapon gets anywhere close to the soon-to-be empress. Heading straight over to the privacy booth, considering I'm carrying five devices that, if misused, could be dangerous. There are some very smartly dressed security guards checking through the last of the guests that have parked and some very well-dressed people.
00:36:42
Speaker
straighten up and pass through the force field portal that is separating the outer lot from the inner palace.
00:36:53
Speaker
walk right up, flip out psychic paper, and say, we're here for the coronation event, and we have brought a very special gift, which is a display. So I want to make sure that your security teams are aware of it, so that way, when it is the appropriate time that you can signal to me, we can provide the Empress and her guests a bit of entertainment in a safe and fun way. They look at you, and the box is, and they say, put them on the scale.
00:37:22
Speaker
The platform that you have just put the five gift-wrapped rockets with pineapple-scented rocket fuel are carefully scanned for anything harmful or listening devices, et cetera, and a helpful little voice reports. Devices benign. Ding!
00:37:49
Speaker
guards nod. All right, step forward to be scanned. Absolutely. So can I get a coordination and subterfuge roll if you are trying to actually smuggle anything in past security, otherwise it's just going to be a coordination roll as they scan you for anything harmful.
00:38:10
Speaker
Oh no, I'd really prefer to do this very in front of security. So, unstrap each of the thigh holders, put them on the scanner, take off the hat, pull out the controller, put it on the scanner, wait till they give me the approval, stick everything back in its place. This takes several minutes. Fast forward and bing, bing!
00:38:27
Speaker
benign, benign, benign, as every single device that the fixer has brought, unstrapped and then strapped back upon their person. Well done. Maeve, calamity. You step forward to be scammed and studied before entering? Yes, I will put my note taker on the scale and say Maeve Sullivan, you space Toledo Chronicle. I believe I need a press badge.
00:38:55
Speaker
They check the document pad, just scrolling through it. You're on the list. And a little pip, a little tiny badge, allowing you, discreetly recognizing you as someone that's allowed to carry a recording device. They offer it and you can stick it on your outfit wherever you like so that you won't be bothered for your pocket. I'll just set it, put it on my outfit. Nice. And head through. OK.
00:39:24
Speaker
Calamity? So Calamity's not trying to hide anything, but she's going to ask a question. So I just wanted to check, because based on how that scanning thing seems to work, I don't know. So I'm pretty sure that literally everything can be dangerous under the right circumstances, right? So when it says that it's benign, what sigma of probability exactly, what's the cutoff for how likely it is to be dangerous that the thing thinks it's so right?
00:39:56
Speaker
They just scan you. Honestly, if the scanner registers Calamity as benign, it's gonna be mildly offended. You're not. You actually aren't. Are you Calamity Hap? Is that spelled right? Calamity Hap? Yes. Right. Miss Calamity Hap.
00:40:18
Speaker
a yellow pip materializes for you to pin to yourself one of the guards says uh okay that's that's that'll be fine keep the fire extinguishers handy and let you through what do you have to do to get other colors
00:40:33
Speaker
Don't worry about it. Can I get a pamphlet? Because if I can collect them, that seems like it. And the auditor steps up and says, hello, terribly sorry about all that. Takes out the sonic compass and the various gadgets and gizmos. Like, actually, these are just wall modes. She doesn't have a nut allergy, does she? Thankfully, no one in the royal family has a nut allergy. And five minutes later, those have been scanned at everything else.
00:41:00
Speaker
The nine, thankfully. Maeve, you step through the the client force field onto the palace grounds. Your pocket reporter blanks out. You will not be able to broadcast anything of your report. You will not be able to send your report or anything like that until you leave the projected force field area again. Just as a matter of like national security and everything. Makes sense.
00:41:27
Speaker
The red lines mark red carpet that leads both to the second staging of the open platform for the palace grounds. The lawn, verdant and beautiful. There are hoity-poity fancy looking people
00:41:45
Speaker
clinking glasses and talking and commiserating on Brennan's good fortune and how excited they all are and off to the left past the main stairs because wherever you look
00:42:00
Speaker
Waite staff are walking around with little commemorative ribbons of crimson and gold and carrying trays of crystallized pineapple in their own little snackums packs. As a display off to the side, roughly the size of a small camper or a large vehicle has been not so tastefully appointed to the front lawn.
00:42:26
Speaker
Do the Snackums workers at that display look happy? The worker, the wait staff that are walking around, you don't get the impression that they're Snackums staff, you get the impression that they are palace staff, but the whole day has been sponsored by Snackums. Little holographic fireworks go off every 10 minutes or so that say, congratulations Lexi, and things like that. But they do so in Snackums colors.
00:42:56
Speaker
So, where to first? Well, how much time do we have? Calamity checks her timepiece. Right now you have roughly an hour and a half or so before the coronation is scheduled to take place, but you have some time. Is this a culture that appreciates punctuality or to show that you have wealth and power you arrive late?
00:43:16
Speaker
They are planning to run things fairly smoothly, but that said, those in power might stretch things out just because they can. Do we have, like, assigned seats or viewing area or anything? Or was it, like, first-come, first-served?
00:43:37
Speaker
The central palace tower stretches high, high into the sky. The balcony terrace up here is several stories above, opening to the open sky. And the broadcast tower appears to reach the very zenith of the holographic dome that's protecting and containing the entire palace. I see. So we're just watching everything from out here, basically.
00:44:06
Speaker
Not necessarily from out here. The palace doors are currently open. People are mingling and talking. No one has discouraged you from walking around, but the security staff, because of your yellow pip, are keeping an eye on Calamity and making sure that she keeps a distance from anything on fire. What are my chances of getting an interview with Lexi?
00:44:27
Speaker
you look around and wonder who to ask that to. And one of the wait staff says members of the royal family can be found either in the palace proper or over at the Snackham's display to be asked that because there's going to be a process of getting closer to the empress herself. Well, we might go to either then, but I could certainly would certainly like to get into if I can.
00:44:56
Speaker
Give us a presence and convince role. You are at advantage. We're going to say this is a difficulty of 15 to try and get any kind of special information out of the waiter you're talking to. So the advantage of, I have like a specialization in getting an interview. That's also true. What does that mean? Yes, that adds an extra point.
00:45:17
Speaker
That is a three and a six for a 16. Okay. The Waiter rolled Snake Eyes. You ask to speak with the Empress and he almost drops his tray. He's like, oh, sorry. No one's actually just straight up asked that. I personally don't know where she is, but I think some of the other royals can point you in the right direction.
00:45:44
Speaker
and he points a free hand towards the Snackums display. Thank you very much, and then I'll start drifting towards Snackums, unfortunately. Calamity, are you still a Snackums employee, technically? I don't think so. I was a consultant at one point, but the other thing was, I mean, before that was just about the carpet hovercraft, and that was a different thing.
00:46:13
Speaker
like they're subsidiary, right? For our listeners at home, Calamity has previously worked for a handful of hours in custodial work on the streets of Joy Blint before it was destroyed and was later recruited as a personal consultant for the robotic staff of the Sigourney, but is not in any way presently affiliated or employed by Snackles.
00:46:38
Speaker
So I do have as my long-term goal to take down Snackums. They are my personal adversary. So I know that they are editing my articles and that I am starting to compile evidence against them. Have I found anything new in recent weeks? Give me an ingenuity and intuition rule and throw on two for being an intrepid reporter.
00:47:06
Speaker
The better you do, the more information you have been able to dig up. I just got double sixes. For 21. That's 21.
00:47:17
Speaker
There's our intrepid reporter. Fixer, you have managed as a Time Lord to somehow collect companions that are equally driven and charismatic, if not more so, than yourself.
00:47:37
Speaker
So the Fixer is not terribly surprised at this point that Maeve is the one getting slight looks of recognition from people in the party because Maeve recognizes some of them. Maeve
00:47:54
Speaker
The people here are not just the wealthy of Britain or any of its neighboring planets or moons. These people are shareholders, former small business owners of snack food, junk food, health food, companies swallowed up by snackums over the last 50 years. And in maves, surreptitious and quiet under the radar,
00:48:18
Speaker
interviews and information digging sessions made contact with people who used to be their own boss and have been truncated down a couple of steps, down the chain of command. They're making more money, but they are no longer their own leaders. You know, now they have to do what comes down the pipeline from the Snackums board of directors.
00:48:41
Speaker
Yeah, there have been some very light rumblings of disquiet, like, oh no, my gold shoes pinch my feet too much when I walk around in them. Oh darn, the diamonds in my pillow are too hard to sleep comfortably. Things are going fairly well for them. It's just, you know, it's not a great fit. Their standards and practices have been under review a number of times from on high with
00:49:08
Speaker
familiar names in... Snackums has standards? That seems big. If Snackums itself does not have standards, at least members of its board of directors do. So yes, you reach a gaudy promotional kiosk the size of a large shop or a small home. It is a mini museum of Snackums history.
00:49:33
Speaker
Brightly painted in red and gold, the display halls give visitors a distinct impression of the fascinating history of the little candy consortium that could. Bowls teeming with miniature packets of crystallized pineapple await at the entrances and exits. They made sure they brought enough for everyone. Maeve is able to walk
00:49:57
Speaker
companions there's like that's not true that's not how that happened that's only kind of true oh as you've reviewed the history of snackums about what started as a humble snack food supplier has grown into the titan of edible industry and how
00:50:13
Speaker
Thankfully, the planet of Joyblint was completely empty of guests and staff when the swarm arrived, and were poisoned by the cleaning agents used to powerwash the planet's surface when it was emptied for maintenance.
00:50:29
Speaker
Thankfully, the planet-wide insurance policy bankrolled Snackham's expansion from that point from mid-sized candy conglomerate into the mega-sweet monopoly that it is today. In the deal of the century wing, there are the next chapter and there's a little floating model of the Sigourney. The gas processing
00:50:52
Speaker
station that you all rescued from utter disaster. And next, behind it, taking up most of the wall, is a portrait of a member of the royal family. You have here a picture of Kyber the shrewd. Kyber brokered the deal with snackums that covered Ditritium processing and has seen to it that the royal family and Brennan's success
00:51:21
Speaker
is tied inexorably with Snacom's success and the coronation. It has also rewritten how you personally save the station, removes any mention of the Fixer or Calamity or Maeve or the gaseous aliens that had to be filtered out of the Dytridium. There is a picture of Brandable Smocket shaking hands with an unamused station chief, and you can just make out the Fixer's TARDIS at the edge of the frame of the picture in the background.
00:51:51
Speaker
Check that out, Maeve. I'm surprised they didn't actually remove that from the picture. Hmm. I'll go and have a closer look. Maeve goes and takes a closer look at the photo. It's just a hollow picture of the VP of PR trying to put the best possible face on the deal of the century. So they do have a PR team, but they're basically a creative right and stuff. Got it.
00:52:18
Speaker
It seems as though every success that Snackums has experienced has been a direct result of our work. Yeah, I don't love that. That must be why they like us enough. It's fine, really. Nothing lasts. Nothing lasts. Is that what you said? If it's up to me, it will last that much longer. I like that picture, though. It definitely looks like he's playing chess. Very concentrated.
00:52:46
Speaker
Yeah, he's very focused. Fixer, give us an awareness role, please. Actually, all three of you, go ahead and give us an awareness role, please. And you are all at advantage. I got a 6 and a 4 for A14.
00:53:01
Speaker
Got a 3 and a 5 for an 11. Not even sniping. Even an 11 is good enough to pick up the lightest whiff of an extremely refined and expensive perfume that you have smelled before. The odiferous opposite of wet cat.
00:53:21
Speaker
It is fanciest of cats, as you hear a musical laughter and a contented purring nearby towards the end of the Snack'em's display wing. No! There stands Kitzie Fancington. Darling, Fixie! You're back! Walk right over with a giant smile on my face.
00:53:50
Speaker
Kitzy, it has been too long. And immediately from behind Kitzy's head comes Intrepid Moopsie. Moo hoo! And she kind of throws her arms wide and falls over onto the pillow purple in front of Kitzy. Dolly, she's happy to see you. So what Kitzy is wearing is a reproduction of an 1896 ball gown by the House of Worth.
00:54:19
Speaker
called the Lilygown, which now sits at the Metropolitan Museum and is occasionally on display. A black ballgown of the deepest vantablack and blooming all over the ballgown are vines and flowers and leaves, which, if you look much more closely, is a combination of bio and nanotechnology. Kitsy got the idea. Joy the lint.
00:54:48
Speaker
And it is now creating photosynthesis and going through the seasons of the year because what it has done is it is a specially calibrated climate optimized only for Kitsi and Mupsi's health. Nothing can affect them. They are in their own personal climate. Both of them are wearing
00:55:13
Speaker
holographic jewelry. If I could share my screen, you'd see that they are opal collars of maybe four or five rows a piece. And never fear for Noopsie, because if Noopsie ever jumps away from Kids See, that collar will activate and she will bring the bubble climate with her. As always, we're prepared and you look fabulous too. How are you all?
00:55:43
Speaker
Kitzie, it is such a joy to see you. Curtsy the Kitzie. And Moopsie, it is such a joy to see you. Curtsy the Moopsie. Moopsie, moopsie, moopsie, moopsie.
00:55:53
Speaker
She's so excited when she bounces up and down the collar, kind of does this too. Lovely to see you, Kit C. Yes, it's great to see you again. How have things been? Darling, things have been going so well. I've had so many ideas. I've employed so many people. We've come up with so many wonderful things. I mean, look around you. Look at what Snackums has become. Quite a lot of expansion, that's for sure.
00:56:22
Speaker
I mean, you know how just one idea can feed into another idea can feed into another idea and suddenly you have a quadrillion dollars and you think, well, I guess I'll fund a couple more ideas. How wonderful.
00:56:36
Speaker
a craggy stone-faced man from the portrait, essentially directly over his shoulder. Kyber the shrewd, one of the highest ranking officers on the board, as well as one of the most senior members of the Imperial family, steps up beside Miss Fencington. Miss Fencington, you will, of course, introduce your guests. Kyber, how do you do? And he offers a hand to shake.
00:57:04
Speaker
Oh yes, this is Kaiba the Shroom. I'll shake his hand. Maeve Sullivan, nice to meet you. Yes, Sullivan. Sullivan, I've read some of your papers. Very driven work. I thank you. And he eyes the fixer and the clouds holographically circling around Kitsy. I trust we're not expecting any storm clouds today.
00:57:32
Speaker
No. Why would we ever do that, darling? You know how I think of everything. Well, yes, that's one of the reasons we've found you're such a capable and intelligent partner. Well, actually just treasure a non-executive directive, but we won't quibble about titles now.
00:57:50
Speaker
He gestures to the rest of the wall, which have more portraits of more members of both the royal family who do double duty as members of the Snackems board of directors. I have personally seen to it. We have kept all the important decision making in the family, so to speak, whenever possible, with the exceptions, of course, of Miss Fencington and the CEO himself.
00:58:20
Speaker
The CEO, sir? Yes. He gestures to the last portrait, the victor, in a suit staring off, looking inspired as he thinks about the future of the entire solar system. He's been with the business longer than anyone and was most contented to join me, drafting the agreements that would eventually become the Snackham's Bernese dynasty. Quite a savage person.
00:58:50
Speaker
And a hell of a snappy dresser. A loud voice pops over your shoulder. Another man sidles up beside him. How do you do? Oh, it's delightful that you've made it. I hope you haven't been spending too much time with this salopus. We don't have any more lemon balls, Guyber.
00:59:13
Speaker
How do you all know? The holographic man now in the flesh that was previously tossing holographic candies at passers-by. I'm the family one, Uncle Monty. Nice to see you. Hello, Uncle Monty.
00:59:29
Speaker
the most garish eyesore of a candy apple red with gold tinsel lining that practically crinkles when he tugs on his lapels. Celebrity director, nice to be here.
00:59:45
Speaker
courtesy first to Kyber and then to Uncle Monty. Kyber looks at Uncle Monty. We're having a conversation amongst adults. Monty just says, whoa, excuse me, terribly sorry, I didn't mean to waste it. And starts sidling off. Kyber, will the CEO be showing up for today's event?
01:00:06
Speaker
Yes, he's here. He's here today. He wouldn't miss it. Every member of our royal family as well as the board are present for this most momentous occasion. He is overseeing other items at the moment. I see. How does it work exactly? Do you like, do people get hired by the company and then you adopt them into the family? Or do you adopt them into the family and then that means that they get a job?
01:00:31
Speaker
Every member of our family has their place and a place for every member of our family. Once it was decided that the Bernese royal family was perfectly suited to assist with the escalation of Sneckems, we have found positions adequate for those members of our lineage and adopted largess. I'm surprised that the Empress does not hold the role of CEO.
01:01:01
Speaker
She has an empire to look after and has her own position on the board. Rest assured she will be trained in the arts of the boardroom. However, we deemed it appropriate that someone with a longer eye on history and the future would indeed be suited for the role of CEO. I did hope that I might have an interview with Her Majesty today.
01:01:29
Speaker
Of course, of course, we can, we can, we can see to that. Maeve, you just hear aloud from the corner where Uncle Monty is smiling and waving at you as he reaches for another packet of crystallized pineapple. Excuse me, I will be right back and I'll like at first look like I'm headed towards like the powder ring or something and then take a sharp turn towards Uncle Monty. I thought you were one of the cool kids.
01:01:58
Speaker
I consider myself very cool, to be honest. And you're a good company. What's this out here? You wanna meet Lexi, little Lexi? I would love to meet Lexi.
01:02:09
Speaker
I mean, there's no time like the present. Certainly not. He takes one of the packets, grips it right at the top, tears it open. Oh, I just love it. And takes a big whiff of crystallized pineapple and tucks the entire thing into a pocket of his crinkling jacket.
01:02:30
Speaker
I'm going to just surreptitiously kind of like wave to the fixer behind my back like I'll be back sort of motion.
01:02:40
Speaker
When I notice Maeve give the wave off, I'll position myself to cut off the view from Kyber the shrewd, so he does not notice, hopefully, that Maeve is interacting with Monty. As you shift position, you see a lovely woman in blueberry tones. That is her complexion, standing, hoping to be noticed near her own giant portrait, Josephine, Duchess of Rooks.
01:03:09
Speaker
Kyber gives her the slightest of gestures. She stands a little taller and drifts closer. Yeah. Hello. Welcome. Welcome to the coordination. Thank you. Hi. Hello.
01:03:42
Speaker
Make the point.
01:03:44
Speaker
of turning directly towards Ysa Josephine, give her my full attention, and give a very low, respectful curtsy. Duchess, it is an honor. How formal. She likes this very much. And she does a full curtsy herself. It is an honor to meet you. Also, I love your shoes. They look super comfortable. Oh, yes, very. They've got a lot of dirt on them, but that's part of the charm. And where do you buy this dirt for the charms?
01:04:12
Speaker
sourced from all over time and space. Organically sourced dirt. Absolutely. Only the finest for this event.
01:04:23
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, it's true, it's true. Do you not enjoy the crystallized pineapple? I have never been a fan of the pineapple, but fortunately for us, the Schnakums make an entire line of different treats, so it is not as if I'm going hungry, but today is just pineapple, pineapple, pineapple, and if my taste buds, they do not bud for that taste.
01:04:48
Speaker
Maeve, an extremely garishly dressed man who crinkles with every other footstep, tiptoes out the back of the Snack'em's display, climbs awkwardly
01:05:04
Speaker
onto the second platform. He offers down a hand and gives you grabby fingers of like, well, nobody'll lose it. I'll take his hand and head up to the other floor. Give me an awareness and intuition roll. That is a four and a one for 12.
01:05:24
Speaker
You don't notice anything out of the ordinary. Uncle Monty, for a biped that looks like an ordinary human, appears to be pushing 70s, but is still fairly spry. He dabs at his forehead with a red and gold handkerchief and crinkles as he stuffs it into the lapel pocket. Woo! I need to be getting more exercise. I gotta get out of a parapets more often. Maybe with a parapets!
01:05:55
Speaker
Yeah, really trying to like humor this man. Everybody is really mad at him, so I'm just going to try to be as nice as possible. Oh, well, you know, if you wish to get out, just a nice walk every now and then is lovely.
01:06:08
Speaker
Oh, absolutely. I couldn't agree more. Meanwhile, in the Snackham's display, Kyber, grateful that Uncle Monty has made himself scarce. Our flock has been devoted to ensuring the success of the royal family, and we have found a use even for the bleakest of sheep.
01:06:42
Speaker
What led him to make such a positive change in his life?
01:06:46
Speaker
discipline from on high and the very strict instructions to fright himself. Meanwhile, Uncle Monty, as he's walking the parapets of the second level, inching his way closer to the palace entry, is just going over a grocery list of embarrassing occasions he's had as a younger man.
01:07:12
Speaker
Well, there was that time with the petting zoo that went sadly awry. I never knew those gates weren't supposed to open. Yes, it's an easy mistake to make. Easy mistake. Real fast, you and Kaiba, there seems to be some friction there. Is it just because he's all, you know, and I'm going to make a face like I've just taken a big bite of lemon?
01:07:32
Speaker
Or is there more there? What a dour-sour-pussy he is. He means well, but what are you gonna do with the white sheep of the family? And keeps walking. In the display, Madame Josephine tells about how he has had the problems before with the excess of the brandy, which we have made sure to keep away from him.
01:07:52
Speaker
he has fortunately been able to replace. You do not just simply stomp out a bad habit, no you replace. And so we have gotten him walks and we have gotten him some exercise and he has really replaced one with the other and now enjoys a healthy snack. So the snack comes in exchange for the brandy which he is not allowed to near.
01:08:17
Speaker
Quickly grab one of the nearby Snackums packets as it goes by, flip it over and make sure it doesn't have any alcohol in the product. You look over the packets on hand and not a one of them have any alcoholic content. These have no narcotic effects in the ingredients, just the incredibly tiny font of the ingredients in the crystallized pineapple, which contains pineapple, sucrose, 14 other words for sugar.
01:08:46
Speaker
And diatritium gas. So, I mean, isn't the point of being extremely wealthy that you can just do whatever you want? Well, that's why I do it, darling. Josephine, without looking, just reaches out for a champagne flute. You would think so, yeah, but there is also the royals. We have to lead by example. We cannot be the constantly humiliating ourselves and making jackasses of ourselves
01:09:12
Speaker
for the public, it could have a detrimental effect. We are ruling the planet, we are ruling the solar system, we have all the businesses tied together in one lovely conglomerate. It would be shameful to have again and again the embarrassment. So fortunately we have found him something to do where he gets a little attention, which he likes a lot, but does not have to make decision.
01:09:38
Speaker
Kitsy, what has been your favorite part of preparing this amazing event? I mean, Mupsy and I just love our lists. Mupsy? It's just a bunch of lists, darling. I just keep finding new stepped ones and putting things together and, you know, suddenly you have a coordination, you have a conglomerates, you're rolling whole solar systems. I somehow become a major shareholder. I mean, we just have these fun things that we do.
01:10:08
Speaker
It could not have gone to a better person, but it must be heavy to wear that crown. The money does help, darling. And of course I am the kind of person that, even if I didn't have money,
01:10:26
Speaker
I always, I still like to keep my mind dizzy. Mopsie and I have been tinkering around. I mean, it's not that it doesn't get heavy sometimes, darling, but you know, like, that's life. The actual crown jewels are under lock and key in the vaults and will remain there safe and sound. Heavy may hang the head that wears the crown, but the crown itself shall be kept under lock and key.
01:10:56
Speaker
Josephine turns to the fixer and calamity and says, would you like to talk? It is a lovely palace. They have done all the things with renovations, and it is absolutely beautiful inside. Oh, yes, certainly.
Palace Intrigue and Security Breaches
01:11:09
Speaker
Maeve, you and Uncle Monty, you enter a massive cathedral of privilege, austerity, and power. The place reeks of importance. Coronation is some two hours away.
01:11:25
Speaker
you are being watched. You could hear right now a pin drop, hovering camera drones just gently floating like balloons bobbing on the light breeze, trying to find a choice angle for any event that might happen as the day unfolds. There are also security guards stoically watching the place, especially since you are traveling with Uncle Monty. Inspection teams
01:11:55
Speaker
pour over camera equipment for any sign of hidden devices. Uncle Monty continues inside. Not a bad joint, huh? How you feeling? You hungry? Oh, I'm not so hungry. I could deal with a little water though. He just
01:12:14
Speaker
claps his hands, a servant that has been nigh invisible, materializes with a platinum tray. Would you like a flat of sparkling? Oh, sparkling, please. Do enjoy, it's Snack'em's Pop. Pops open a bottle of Snack'em's brand sparkling water.
01:12:35
Speaker
Thank you. I'm going to like sniff it and see if it seems like this will turn me into a giant flower lady. You sniff at it, Monty.
01:12:50
Speaker
looks at you is like don't worry it's not alcoholic don't they won't let me anywhere near that stuff i'll take a little sip but it's like a very like it's a small one and then i like but i hold it a little longer so it looks like a bigger sip are you trying not to burp yeah i just don't want to burp in such a beautiful place like this it would be it feels like a little profane
01:13:14
Speaker
Oh, absolutely. And he takes a huge bowl from a fresh bottle and lets rip with a... That echoes across the back of the palace. And he said, Oh, excuse me, excuse me. I just love it. And walks into the throne room. This room
01:13:40
Speaker
is as long as it is deep and tall. It may remind Maeve of the throne room she was in in Clockton, in Queen Makana's, but benign. This place is more of a statement of unity
01:13:58
Speaker
then the one person has all of the power. All of the stained glass is a myriad of different colors that have been sequenced together into a truly beautiful constellation of the Bernese solar system. Oh, this is amazing. These stained glass is lovely. Bernese hasn't always been this pretty, you know. Really? Oh my, yes, we've had our fair share of hardships.
01:14:25
Speaker
when there is a loud squeal from a chamber off to the east side of the throne room and a older man sticks his head out. Maeve might have caught his portrait in the hall
01:14:43
Speaker
but an old man in priestly vestments. Marjorie, is that you? Ah, with a guest who may or may not be supposed to be here, of course. And he straightens up and he...
01:14:59
Speaker
shuts the door behind him and daughters his way down the hall. Young lady, Monty, are you sure you're supposed to be him here with this young lady? Maeve Sullivan, nice to meet you. It's very nice to meet you. Uncle Monty loudly elbows him in the ribs.
01:15:25
Speaker
I was just telling Magia about all the dark times. You remember the dark times, don't you? And Hyship pinches the brow of his criticism brow, like, yes, yes, yes. Do try and show some decorum. You have actually at least had the word. The decorum? Don't have any use for it. I had the decorum. I threw it all out. Hyship just shakes his head. There was a blight.
01:15:52
Speaker
that struck this continent some time ago, several generations back. And we have found that continuing the family line with our usual hopes of success and as was not so successful. Yes, successful. And so we have adopted wider nets
01:16:18
Speaker
Clue those that have been deemed a royal family, and so that the Bernese royal family can continue to be strong. Well, that does sound very inspiring, like a story of inclusivity. May I ask, though, what was the problem with the first natural line of successors over knock the line?
01:16:43
Speaker
The Blight unfortunately made it quite impossible for the royal family to conceive for what was almost a very last generation. Fortunately with the stewardship of former archivists, we have been able
01:17:04
Speaker
to see to it that our traditions continues in its various forms. And of course, since then, we have improved things and found means of continuing the line in other ways at the time it was important to ensure the survival of the royal life. Wow, that does make sense. Well, I am adopted myself, so I think your family is very inspirational in its decisions.
01:17:31
Speaker
He warms to that? Maeve. Add one story point. You are now going to be at a plus two to any social interactions with the right and just Deacon Hyship. Calamity. A little hoverbot. A little camera taking candids catches your eye and just...
01:17:55
Speaker
taking snapshots okay cuts is my eye just in the sense that I notice it not it's trying to get my attention is it is it aiming for anything in particular or is it just looking it's just taking random pictures of people or is it looking for like certain kinds of behavior
01:18:08
Speaker
Give me an ingenuity and technology role. Yeah. Okay. So I have a 14 and nothing special. In your travels, you have seen these little doodads before. It is not a top of the line model, but you also cotton that it is a different model than the larger steady cams that are just, you know, catching B roll for the later documentary of the event of the decade.
01:18:38
Speaker
There are no other particular camera bots like this one. I don't think it's made because she's busy. I guess I'm going to, I'm going to go over and like see if I can see if I can see if it's like, I don't know, like operating on any particular pattern that might suggest like where it's being controlled from. Like if it's tending to orbit like around a certain place.
01:19:03
Speaker
What you pick up on is the fact that this one bumps into the display and has to back up and turn, whereas the other slightly larger cams are on some kind of autopilot and their own systems to make sure they don't run into anything. It's possible that the little duper is being remotely controlled. Okay, I don't have any signal tracking technology on me.
01:19:29
Speaker
That's okay. Getting distracted by the tiny cam gets the attention of Duchess Josephine and Kyber and possibly the Fixer. Fixer, give us an ingenuity and technology role, please. You got it.
01:19:46
Speaker
What is this? Okay, I got a six and a six on the dice for a total of 20. Bravo. Fixer, you recognize and can practically smell on this thing the local remote access. This thing is not colored like the other models. It is not flying like the other models. And it is not keeping a respectful distance the way that the other models do. You might have located a helicopter Razi.
01:20:16
Speaker
Tell me more about the Helicaparazzi. The Helicaparazzi are small, remote-controlled cameras, nimble and tiny and obnoxious as hummingbirds in every regard. With the two of you looking at it, Kyber, his face darkens and Josephine points and spits. It's like, kids, these were the damn machines! Kyber reaches into a jacket and says,
01:20:44
Speaker
We have signal on the grounds. We have signal on the grounds. The minute it seems obvious that Kyber is, this is not one of Kyber's, I would like to pop out the Sonic and see if I can both check to see is this just a camera system or if it has any other onboard weapons or systems we need to know about and see if I can track it back to the source. Give us an ingenuity and technology role plus two for the Sonic.
01:21:14
Speaker
you are at advantage because you're already working with a natural twine. Excellent.
01:21:19
Speaker
Maeve, you hear a boop-boop-boop-boop from outside, and in the stained glass, the various glass panes that are red suddenly flash red, the people you're with look up at them, Hishup just shakes his head as I come back this way, come along, come along. Even Uncle Monty buttons his lip for a hot minute. I got a four and a two on the dice for a total of 16.
01:21:45
Speaker
Kyber is trying to command people into place and so forth. When he spots you, pull out the sonic and immediately lock onto the helicopter. It hovers and then does a 180 and then starts flying directly towards the palace proper.
01:22:11
Speaker
My apologies, fine folks. I would like to check on that, and if that is as much not one of yours as it appears to be, you may want to send the security to assist me. Follow that device. Josephine has to, like, he has to stop Josephine from throwing her champagne at it to try and douse it and kill it right out of the air. Maeve, in a matter of seconds, you hear the...
01:22:36
Speaker
Continue as the doors behind you burst open. Guards enter, followed swiftly by the Fixer and Calamity, following the Fixer and his Sonic up the pews. Down on the right side of the pews facing the throne room, someone crouching, trying not to be seen in the throne room proper, has
01:23:01
Speaker
a tiny, tiny smart device trying to restart the camera device that is no longer following their commands. Come on, come on! I'll pay five whole quid for you! And smacks it nothing. The guy is lifted to his feet by the guards. Kyber, furious, is like, do you have any idea what you could have done?
01:23:25
Speaker
We have enough problems today without internopies like you and your helicopter. One of the guards beside him just snatches a hand out and grabs the hovercam and crushes it like a Christmas ornament in his fist. Kyber straightens up some of my apologies we've had to deal with any manner of
01:23:50
Speaker
developers who wish to snatch a private moment of the royals. They follow us non-stop. They are the very reason that we have had to partake of all of these security measures, especially after a... And he stops himself.
01:24:09
Speaker
looks to Uncle Monty and Hyshup, buttons his lip. The Deacon, I don't know whose answer. No, no, calm, not calm, okay, but these people had no idea this young ruffian was here. Take him away, question him. And the guards take the cameraman who is dressed as a waiter badly, his clip on tie is hanging from one side of his collar, and he's like, who's gonna pay for that camera? That wasn't free, you know?
01:24:38
Speaker
And the people going around to see what's going on in here start pulling him away. Maeve, you have encountered bottom-rung paparazzi like that guy before. You have been advised away from them as you've published more stories. You know that that person is in no way affiliated with the New Toledo Space Chronicle.
01:25:02
Speaker
I'll look at Bishop Hisholm and be like, I am sorry to hear that you've had so much trouble maintaining your privacy before. There is a certain dignity to these proceedings and we want to make sure that the face that we show to the public is one that is polished and refined and not what some snake in the grass deems appropriate. Give me a presence and convince role. Maeve, you are at advantage with Deacon Hisholm.
01:25:33
Speaker
That's a 13.
01:25:51
Speaker
have some affiliation with one of our other board members, perhaps they deserve to be enlightened. He turns slightly opening towards the study attached to the throne room proper. Miss Sullivan, if you will come this way.
01:26:09
Speaker
With all due respect, sir, if one person was able to sneak onto your waitstaff, that means there may be more. And while that gentleman definitely had unpleasant intentions, it does not seem he was a threat. I would recommend you have your security do another sweep of all of the areas, as well as check on the crown jewels.
01:26:29
Speaker
You heard the man? Well, what are you waiting for? Coronation? The guards nearby look. Yes, sir. And they go off immediately and you can hear their boots tromping away across the floor. You are led into the study. As I walk there, I'd like to say, you know, one way to stop these sorts of intrusions is to give the people what they want. Tell the story, but tell it your way.
01:26:55
Speaker
Monty says, look at that, Maeve the shrewd! How about that? Before Kyber can disagree to vehemently, Hishup says, the young lady has a point, we should get in front of the story. Kyber says very well, Josephine, there's no need for you to invacle yourself in this. But- No, go see to the guests, keep them docile.
01:27:21
Speaker
Very well, very well. And looking kind of disappointed, Josephine walks off, looks annoyed. You are let into the study. There is a desk, a ticking grandfather clock in the corner, and rows and rows of books on custom and propriety. And the order of rule of Brennan on the desk is a unfolded sheet of paper
01:27:50
Speaker
with letters from candy wrapping cut into a death threat against the Empress to be. We have tried our very best to keep this under wraps, but there has been disquiet and even threats over Lexi's ascension to Empress. What makes her so controversial?
01:28:13
Speaker
Kyber shakes his head like there's too many answers. Any leader must face public scrutiny and some fool out there thinks that their opinion and their thoughts on the matter are more important than the Empress itself. Remember what I said. Tell the story and tell it your way. I'll rephrase the question. What makes Lexi the best ruler?
01:28:40
Speaker
There is the slightest breath of a whisper as an elevator descends and fine wood paneling that could be mistaken for some kind of liquor cabinet whispers open, Kyber turns and out steps.
01:29:00
Speaker
Actually, I would like to ask him something in that moment before the Empress enters the room. Yes, please. Kyber. And I say this only because you have this obvious security threat. What would be the effect if somebody were to simultaneously remove the majority of the board members for Nacom's and remove the entire royal family of this system at the same time? Disaster. Utter, utter disaster.
01:29:24
Speaker
Who would benefit most from that? The doors slide open before you say, who would benefit most from that? The answer langers out of the most private of elevators as a salt and pepper gentleman strides out of the elevator with enough time.
01:29:48
Speaker
One can turn any second stance to their advantage. Fixer. How lovely to see you again. And he steps aside and says, Allow me to introduce Empress-to-be Lexi VII.
01:30:07
Speaker
and out steps a woman no older than 25. She has light burgundy skin that appears natural and wears a tuxedo that has just the smallest, most tasteful of red and gold ribbon to include snackums. She says, all this ever me.
01:30:31
Speaker
Not again. Like she strolls into the room and immediately the place relaxes half an inch. Like shoulders sag. This young woman is pre-possessed of confidence and charisma. Just this vibe of that's the person that should be making the decisions. That's the person that knows what's going on. And she goes,
01:31:01
Speaker
and sits behind the desk. Like, on first glance, you'd think the Archdeacon, or one of the older gentlemen who are vocally making most of the decisions, that would be their desk, but no, she just slips into it, turns to them and says, what was it this time? Kyber says, another kind of coparazzo, and she just tisks. I told you, I told you, all of this security only is going to inspire them more.
01:31:31
Speaker
And yet, honored empress, such security is necessary to keep you safe. Immediately give Victor the eye. I missed you too.
01:31:42
Speaker
I am going to studiously not look at Victor because last time I saw him I punched him in the face. And instead I give Lexi a very deep courtesy. It is lovely to meet you, Your Majesty. Are you? Maeve Sullivan, new space Toledo Chronicle.
01:32:01
Speaker
based Toledo Chronicle. Yes, I've read some of your, I've read some of your articles. Uncle Monty's shared them. So has, so has the Victor. They've been truly illuminating some, some, some wonderful reports of yours. I like your work. I believe they say in the part. You honor me. Thank you very much.
01:32:21
Speaker
Her fingers brush through a small demi-bowl of wrapped, crystallized pineapple and then just flex it away and decides not right now. Kyber explains the decision to appoint Lexi the seventh as the next Empress was after a long debate between the various royals because since half of them are adopted into the family line now, the rule of succession, the line of succession is kind of pretzled.
Empress Lexi's Leadership and Threats
01:32:49
Speaker
Technically, Kyber the shrewd is the oldest and most qualified, but he is also the oldest and does not have a great deal of time left, so they thought after much deliberation that a fresh face, that an informed face, that one of confidence and poise should be the face of the family moving forward, which is why she also is on the board inclined to
01:33:14
Speaker
you know, learn how the company is run, learn how the family is supposed to run together as the crown is coming to her in a matter of hours. I was just talking here with your family about the importance of telling the story that you want people to hear. And I thought perhaps we might find some time to talk about what you would like the people to know about you. You know?
01:33:35
Speaker
I think that sounds lovely. Would you and your friends like to stay while the rest give us the room? It's not a question, Kyber nods, and Uncle Monty look. You hear that? Oh she's got the neck!
01:33:53
Speaker
Vanishes out the door. Victor bows obediently to the Empress and says, But of course, your Imperial Majesty, I'll go check on the tower and make sure that everything's ready for your official coronation speech. And he vanishes into the elevator and the doors. I was hoping to grab him right before he gets into that elevator and leaning closely and say,
01:34:22
Speaker
Victor, I know it may not seem like it, but I am very happy to see you. With that said, nothing good will happen if harm befalls these people.
01:34:32
Speaker
You have my word, as a lord of time, I am fully invested in seeing these people safe. Understood. Understood. You understand that he's being honest with you. It benefits him nothing to jeopardize the royal family. They are half the linchpin of everything Snackums has been building for. He vanishes up the elevator, Kyber and the others.
01:35:01
Speaker
Kitsy stays wherever she wants, darling. Lexi explains that just in the last two weeks, the first death threat arrived. That is when leaks started to happen in security. For reasons that elude her, how could anyone in the system want to bring this down? Are the threats asking? Are they making demands? Are they just saying,
01:35:30
Speaker
We're going to kill you. The death threats are basically saying that if Lexi takes the crown, she will not survive the coronation. Do you know who might be sending these letters?
01:35:42
Speaker
Letters have all been cut out of Snacom's wrappers. They'd be impossible to trace. As the candy bar reads, they're everywhere. So literally just about anyone could have gotten their hands on Snacom's wrappers and cobbled these together. Kitsy, have you noticed any changes in the designs or layout to the Empress's crown since the last coronation?
01:36:06
Speaker
Did they change the metals it's made of? Did they change the shape of the crown? Did they add a bunch new gems to it? Is there anything that makes this, oh the better crown, or a different crown than what was used in the previous generation?
01:36:19
Speaker
Well, I definitely wouldn't call it better. They went back to gold and rubies, which is just not my thing at all. I mean, it just causes ever so many hairballs. So that's really the biggest difference. Oh, and then they, you know, they did cut me out of that entire design process, which was strange. I have ever such good taste, you know.
01:36:45
Speaker
It is absolutely true. I'm actually surprised, Empress, that you would not involve Kitsi in such a process. I mean, this is truly something that they excel at. The Empress says that Kitsi's been invited to the royal fittings. The crown, with its new fixture, has been through the same scanning process as everything else.
01:37:11
Speaker
to confirm that there are no explosives or listening devices or anything of that kind. The scanner said that rocket fuel is not dangerous, which strikes me as a bit optimistic, honestly. So I'm not quite sure that they're working great. Well, the difference between a small toy versus large quantities of something that could explode in your face are kind of two different things. Okay.
01:37:37
Speaker
Empress, I do not say this as a threat. I say this to share with you a huge hole in your security. It would be very easy for someone to sneak weapons into this place. Reach down, pull out one of my screwdrivers and just place it on the table. She eyes it like it's going to tick.
01:37:56
Speaker
Oh, don't worry, it's just a screwdriver. But as you can see, your security teams aren't in the room. People who you have just met have been allowed by your security team to be in a room alone with you, with a metal shiv. We came here with the best of intentions. That is why I am sharing this information with you. Please, Empress, please take this seriously.
01:38:18
Speaker
She taps her lapel and there's a shimmer across her and she says, well, you would be hard pressed to injure me with that. I have been, my couture includes a personal force field for the occasion, but I was under the impression that you were here to interview and help, not threaten.
01:38:42
Speaker
Not a threat at all, Empress. That is why I have worded it the way I have. It was only on our way in that I discovered this huge flaw in your security, as Calamity tried to point out. This is a very concerning flaw. While many things could be allowed in that might be viewed as tools, in certain situations, those tools could be combined to create things that are very dangerous and very deadly. I fear deeply fear safety, Empress.
Conclusion and Reflection
01:39:09
Speaker
As Lexi listens to the Fixer's warning, and her eye is drawn to the death threats cut out of candy bar wrappers,
01:39:42
Speaker
That was part one of the ruling class.
01:39:45
Speaker
I would love to go around the table, really catch up with our team, and deal out some precious, tasty experience points. Caden, how is Mae thinking of reporting on today's events? I'm not so sure she's made up her mind about these people yet, or what she thinks of them. But she would like to ask some questions about Lexi's plans for her country and for her reign as Empress, and what she'd like to see for her people.
01:40:13
Speaker
Very savvy, very sharp. You should have the opportunity to ask those questions in part two. Dora, what has Calamity made so far of today's twists and turns on the Bernese homeworld?
01:40:28
Speaker
She's reasonably so assuming that something is going to happen, and she's been sort of watching for it, but it's all very low key, right? So she's trying to figure out, maybe something's just happening in the wrong place. Maybe it's happening to the auditor, and they're just not seeing it, because everything is so calm and taken care of, and everything's okay. I mean, there's death threats, but no one is concerned about them exactly. They're just sort of offended.
01:40:57
Speaker
I mean, they are concerned. Security around the place has been ramped up despite being able to bring in a sonic device and toy rockets. If I thought the rockets could actually be used in any way to harm someone, I don't think they would have cleared the security screen. You guys got creative as hell, and I wanted to say yes and. That's basically why you have rockets now.
01:41:25
Speaker
That's actually why I chose to use the screwdriver as the example, not the rockets, because the rockets really are just genuinely a gift to show off and give her a good coronation. Brand, what has surprised you about part one of today's mod? I absolutely loved going around the bazaar. The bazaar was absolute joyfulness.
01:41:45
Speaker
I think the biggest surprise so far has actually been that the victor may actually want to keep these people alive because honestly the minute I saw that picture of the victor in the Snackums display my first thought is oh cool he's gathered together everybody who else would be in the command structure he's gonna wipe him out with one shot take over both the solar system and the company in one fell swoop and then be able to do whatever his real plan is
01:42:10
Speaker
I love it. You can't have a season of stories where a nefarious, plotting, mustache-twirling, beard-stroking mastermind destroys a planet and sends miners to their doom and maven and calamity burn that town down. And third thing, there's no way to bring him into this story without you immediately being suspicious of him. And that's basically why we're here for it. That's, hi Murph!
01:42:40
Speaker
Hey Murph! What is going through Kitsy's mind at this stage in events?
01:42:47
Speaker
I'll be honest, I think Kitsy's kind of offended because as these holes are being, especially in things like security, are being exposed, she is realizing that she has been shielded from a lot more information than she originally thought. And as much as she prides herself on doing separate deals, she is 95% certain that things have been deliberately kept from her and that is not okay.
01:43:16
Speaker
That is not how a tight ship remains tight. I would like to meet out some lovely delicious experience points to our faithful
Player Experience and Feedback
01:43:27
Speaker
crew. All of you, please take one experience point for part one of our journey.
01:43:33
Speaker
And Maeve, take a second one for that moment of connection with Hyshup, both characters being adopted. That seemed like a real nice moment of communion to me. Would you care, you lovely players, to share highlights or give your fellow players a pat on the back? Was there something they did or a part of that really stuck out for you today?
01:43:53
Speaker
Kendora, I can't wait to see how this rocket comes back into play that you bought, the used rocket. I am so excited. Me too. I'm excited for that. That was awesome. Oh my god. I mean, you know, yeah. Luck is preparation plus opportunity, so. Calamity is always preparing. Luck is maybe the wrong word for what she's preparing for, but...
01:44:20
Speaker
I know it's going to be special. That's all I know, and that's all I need to know right now. Whatever it is, it's going to be so exciting. Rock it in the suitcase. As ever, the sartorial choices are very wonderful. I want to congratulate everyone on how they interpreted the fanciest of dress. Seconded, y'all look pretend amazing.
01:44:47
Speaker
I would actually like to give Kate med props for the way she navigated the pet store. Didn't expect it to go that way. That was awesome. That was perfection. And now we have a TARDIS mascot. We have George the Snake. I'm so excited. And I like the fact that we're promoting snakes as like happy, cute animals. They're just little guys. Yeah. Robot. Just little guys. Happy, cute robot. Also, yes. In this case, yes, a robot.
01:45:17
Speaker
but maybe we can get some upgrades for george in the future please no please there was literally a shop on the map that said robot upgrades that's true like check offs robot upgrades shop
01:45:33
Speaker
We've had cyborgs and an honest-to-goodness robot at one point on a table, and I wanted to give everybody that might pass through the TARDIS doors something that might leap out to them. It's like, oh, I can get robot upgrades here, you know, things like that. I see. Well, now you're regretting that decision.
01:45:52
Speaker
I am starting to regret, but it's just like, you know, the first rumblings at the top of the mountain, where just one or two flakes are flying off and catching. We'll pop by when we show back up to get eat from every single shot. We'll pop by robotic grades and see what we can find for George.
01:46:10
Speaker
I hope we can find some wings for George, because I feel like that would be perfection. Yes! Do you want a Quetzalcoatl, George? Well, I mean, it does make it a very unique mascot. We could... Oh, man. Thank you all for joining us today. And finally, to our listeners, another great big thank you for sharing your precious time with us.
01:46:34
Speaker
If you feel it's been well spent, please share Anywhere But Now with your friends who are looking to enjoy themselves. If you like what you hear, leave a review, rate the show, and follow us on Blue Sky as well as Twitter at Anywhere But Now and wherever you get your podcasts.
01:46:50
Speaker
Don't forget to send your questions, fan art, and theories if you got them to anywhere but now, podcast at gmail.com. If you'd like me to run a game for you of your very own, do find me on startplaying.games. Links to everything in the doobly-doo. From all of us, I'm Casey Jones. There are exciting things to come, my friends. I'm glad you're along for the ride. Thanks so much, and have a great day.