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Dark Desires: Fantasies We’d Never Admit… Except Here
19 Plays5 months ago
In today’s episode, Diane shares the details for her upcoming DREAM Malibu wedding and why she’s opted to be a *chill* bride — unless there is an unexpected snack shortage. Then we jump into 4 juicy confessions all about dark fantasies. Are you into feet? Ever dreamed about being stalked? Day dreaming about that one toxic ex? Let’s get into it, babes!
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👉🏼 NOW ACCEPTING YOUR CONFESSION SUBMISSIONS! Click the link below and fill out the form to submit your juiciest secret for us to discuss on the show. NOTHING is off-limits and everything is anonymous.
https://form.typeform.com/to/K6NPqqS1
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Looking for a different kind of summer vacation? Join Diane and Gabby May 16-23 for their Camp Yūgen women’s summer camp experience in the south of France!
Get ready for 7 days of all-inclusive luxury and fun— horseback riding, hiking, exploring medieval castles, yoga, crafting, pajama parties, organic chef-prepared meals, all while staying in a gorgeous 18th century chateau.
🇫🇷 For more information and to book your suite, visit www.campyugen.com/may2025
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Transcript
Welcome to Doorknob Confessions
00:00:06
Speaker
Hi, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Doorknob Confessions. We are so excited to be with you today, as always, living life in the chaos and in the now. um But taking time to be with you. So thank you for taking time to be with us.
Diane's Wedding Planning Journey
00:00:22
Speaker
Diane, how are you doing? I am doing good. I am in a busy season of life, and it's always funny when you're in these seasons of life because You feel so chaotic and so busy, but then once all the dust settles, you're like, oh, actually like life is really fun when things are busy. So I have like this profound like appreciation for the season of life that I'm currently in. Oh my God, I love that. And for those of you listening, Diane is planning her wedding, which is coming up, what is that in March?
00:00:51
Speaker
It's March. Yeah, March 22. I feel like that date is going to be permanently ingrained into my head because I've signed so many contracts with vendors, like stating that date specifically. You'll never forget it. No, I'll never forget it. Planning a wedding is so wide. Yeah, please tell me because we eloped. So like, I don't know anything about planning a wedding. Like, how do you do that?
Navigating Wedding Industry Complexities
00:01:16
Speaker
i mean it's I mean, first of all, I hired a wedding planner. I cannot believe I even had the audacity to think that I could do this without a wedding planner, because even with a wedding planner, it's so crazy. The wedding industry is wild. People are just squeezing you of your money in my opinion. It's so expensive to get married. like I mean, it's like more expensive than college sometimes. Oh, it's way it was way more expensive than my USC master's degree.
00:01:45
Speaker
Um, but you know, it's, it's kind of, I mean, it doesn't help that I'm getting married in Malibu. I mean, I definitely chose like a pretty hefty price location. Um, but I've always dreamed of getting married in Malibu. And I've always been that little girl who like, if you ever watch Bride Wars and Hathaway has like a scrapbook of like what she wants her wedding to be when she's seven years old, like that was me.
00:02:07
Speaker
I always knew that I wanted like a really pretty wedding and I considered eloping because the thought of that many eyes on me still freaks me out to this day. But planning a wedding has been really fun and getting together like all of my friends and family and just like combining our families are like the concept of it is just like really cool.
00:02:28
Speaker
I love that you're getting married in Malibu. That was actually like kind of one of my fantasies too, like a beach wedding, he California, like the beautiful sunset, the atmosphere is just like perfect. Like walk us through exactly how your day is going to look.
00:02:44
Speaker
Okay, so we got an Airbnb in Malibu. So it's like a 15 minute drive. I don't live far from Malibu. It's like probably 40 minutes, 30, 40 minutes. But I was like, I just want to be like in my vibes, you know? what yeah a wait song So we got a really nice Airbnb and then my mom is going to pick me up, bless my heart bless her heart. She's like going to be my chauffeur for the day because I'm really worried. I'm really bad at keeping secrets. like I will buy a gift for my fiance and then tell him like the second I bought it, even though I'm want not supposed to. So I'm worried that if I have the wedding dress with me, I'm just going to want to show him the night before. Oh my God, seriously?
00:03:26
Speaker
So my mom's gonna have the wedding dress. We're gonna get ready.
Essentials for a Perfect Wedding Day
00:03:28
Speaker
All like the girls are gonna get ready together. I'm not doing bridesmaids. So it's gonna be mostly like my my mom, his mom and then his sister. So like all the girls are getting ready together. And then we're gonna be doing a first look because I love the idea of just like getting that moment with like your person and like not being in front of everybody when like the first time you're seeing each other is. And so we're going to do that, um, grab a snack. I, the one thing I requested for my wedding planners is please do not let me go hungry. I am not a fun person to be around when I'm hungry. Um, I know that about myself. And so we're going to get lots of snacks throughout the day and then people are going to trickle in and we're going to do the ceremony. We're doing cocktail hour with lots of like fire food.
00:04:16
Speaker
Um, we're doing wood burn, wood fire pizzas. Like where there's like, Oh my God, mean that's dope. Yeah. No, I'm here for the food girl. And I know like I get hangry and that is so kudos to self awareness for knowing that you'd be like a little bit of a monster if you're hungry, because like me too.
00:04:35
Speaker
Look, like I'm not a bridezilla, but I will become a monster if I'm not fed. Like I want to be fed throughout the day. I love this. I bought a wedding dress intentionally that allows me to eat and not be uncomfortable in my body because like I blow. I tend to blow a lot when I have like gluten and I will not be gluten free on the day of my wedding. I love that.
00:05:00
Speaker
Yeah, because all food rules just go out the window. I don't care if I'm bloated the next day. I'm already married. So like good luck running away from me. um trapped Trapped for life, baby. Yeah, literally. um And so I'm excited. I think it's going to be such a fun time. We're doing an open bar as soon as the wedding starts till the wedding ends. Because let's be real, like weddings are kind of boring unless you're the one getting married. And so you might as well get fed and get drunk off your ass.
00:05:29
Speaker
No, for sure. And can we talk about it? like i I've never been to a wedding that had a cash bar, but I
Logistical Challenges and Stories
00:05:36
Speaker
think that's so unbelievably tacky. That's so tacky. People are buying outfits to come to your wedding. They're taking hours out of their day. They're celebrating you. like Give them some drinks. like let Do not make them pay for their drinks. Don't be like that. Or just elope. like I don't know. Yeah. No, I totally agree. And like majority of our guests are literally flying in from either Korea or from like the East Coast, because a lot of Jay's friends are in the Marine Corps. And so they are in like North Carolina. And so most of them are all flying in. And so I'm like, Okay, you guys are all taking time out of your weekend. The least I can do is get you drunk as fuck.
00:06:15
Speaker
Well, this is going to be a good party. I'm really sad that I'm going to miss it. I'm back in France and I'm here until Ellie's first birthday, which is like April 2nd. So the timing was just kind of everything was all at the same time, so I couldn't make it. But I know it's going to be amazing. I can't wait to see pictures. I'm just like thinking about it now makes me so like happy for you because I know you've been with Jay for what, eight years?
00:06:37
Speaker
Yeah, almost eight years now. Oh my god. So this moment has been a long time waiting, a long time waiting. I actually have like a funny story about bridesillas and things like that. There was a girl that I was friends with in high school and I will not name names because I don't want to put her on the spot.
00:06:54
Speaker
But um I had gone to California. I lived in New Jersey. She was in New Jersey. and I had gone to California to go to USC for undergrad. And I was like a broke college student. And she decided to have like this lavish I was she asked me to be a bridesmaid. and And she asked to do this like lavish, whole like bridesmaids weekend. And then like this is the bridesmaids dresses she wanted. And I was like waiting tables, making minimum wage. like First of all, I have i had to like maybe buy my ticket right to go back to new New Jersey for whatever she was doing. Then the dress. Then this whole elaborate weekend she had planned. like I just didn't have the money for that.
00:07:33
Speaker
And we like we weren't extremely close, but it was a girl in my group of girlfriends right that we had spent a lot of time with. Get this. I told her, hey, I need more time to put some money together to be able to afford to go to this, but I'm in.
00:07:50
Speaker
And by the time I called to order my bridesmaid's dress, the person at the bridal place actually said, oh, she canceled you as a bride bridesmaid. She didn't even tell me. She did not even tell me. We We have not talked to this day. She never communicated that. I didn't go to her wedding. I was kicked out for not being able to afford all of the things she wanted to do for her bridal thing. And like I felt so awful for such a long time. And now I look back and I'm like, that was kind of unreasonable. like I feel like that was a little unreasonable.
00:08:24
Speaker
That was that's so and you know what it is like I've heard stories like this and I truly think that people take it so personally but when in reality it's truly just like a financial thing where it's like we don't I i can't afford it right now that's a huge reason why I didn't want to do like bridesmaids because um a lot of my friends are students still or they're still like in grad school or whatever the case may be and like it's just a lot of pressure especially especially in this economy. ah And so we're not doing bridesmaids.
Confessions: Humorous and Introspective
00:08:51
Speaker
We're not doing anything like that. No, we're not even doing a bachelorette bachelor party. I'll be honest, you guys, like half of that reason was all of, I mean, my fiance is a Marine, all of his friends are Marines. I do not want all of them like coming together and partying honestly. Why? What do you think is going to happen?
00:09:12
Speaker
I don't know. That's what worries me. like I don't have any like awareness of what could happen, which terrifies me. One of his friends was like, oh, so we got an Airbnb for like a lot of our friends. We got a huge Airbnb. And that's kind of like our combined bachelor-bachelor at party slash after party. And one of his friends was like, oh, can I bring midget strippers? and Wait, what? And I was like,
00:09:38
Speaker
No. Wait, I'm sorry. Can you back up 30 seconds here? like He asked specifically for midget strippers. Well, okay. I should give a little bit of a backstory because I have this thing where like I told him that his like hall pass is because he's like, I've always wanted to have sex with the midget. This is a confession.
00:10:01
Speaker
kind of like a running joke. And like, i obviously would never happen because like, it's just like just wouldn't happen. But he like brought that up his friend was like, Oh, what if I brought midget strippers and my fiance was like, Do not do that. This is a very classy like Italian style wedding in Malibu. Like it's not that because a lot of Marines will have backyard weddings because it's like they just get married when they're really young.
00:10:24
Speaker
And so backyard weddings are a thing. And so they were just kind of like, oh, maybe this is just like another backyard wedding. It's like, no, no, this is like a six course dinner. And there will be like chefs like cooking food. Oh, Lord. That is I get that, though, that it's like more of like an inside joke. I do think, though, the politically correct term is is little people.
00:10:46
Speaker
Are we allowed to say? what i've I've met people, little people, and they said that midget is fine. like I've heard both things where people are like, I don't like midget, and then other people are like, no, it's smart. I just don't want to get canceled on our second episode. I've heard somewhere that you can only get canceled if you let yourself get canceled.
00:11:07
Speaker
That's like an Eleanor Roosevelt quote, but like modern day. Is it really? No, it's not literally. But she does a quote like you can't, I don't know. I don't know the quote exactly. Maybe nick producer Nick can look it up. It's like an Eleanor Roosevelt quote about like you can only um be disrespected if you like if you say so or something like along those lines. But anyway. Well, Eleanor Roosevelt's very ahead of her time.
00:11:31
Speaker
really She's really with it. She's super modern. But this sounds like fun. it's And I really appreciate like a thoughtful bride, like not putting anybody in a bad position, not putting anybody in a financially tough position to try and make you happy not being a bridezilla. like That is class and dignity right there. And um I'm really, really excited for you. Me too.
00:11:53
Speaker
It's going to be great. OK, so guys, let's get into these confessions. I have a few that I picked up this week that I am really excited to get into. They are a little scandalous. Oh, Nick found the Eleanor Roosevelt quote. So let me share this. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. There you go. Oh, I love that. This is kind of the same.
00:12:15
Speaker
It is the same, totally. It is the same. OK, so anyway, I found a bunch of confessions. I actually have not shared them with Diane. So this is the first time she's hearing them. Some of them had me rolling on the floor cackling. Some of them had me terrified. And some of them were like very relatable. So let's get into our first one, shall we? Yes, I'm so excited. I'm so excited. OK, starting strong.
00:12:41
Speaker
Confession number one, I'm into women's feet. And when I was in secondary school, there was this girl in the year above me. Diane, sorry, I'm losing it. Okay, when I was in secondary school, there was a girl a year above me. She used to make me smell her shoes. She's what?
00:13:01
Speaker
She's one of the reasons I'm into it. Anyway, we got back in touch a few months ago, so I'm assuming they're adults now, um and a few days ago I asked her about it, thinking with my dick if I'm being completely honest, and she said she, quote, doesn't remember it at all. I feel like I've made things weird. What's worse is that I described two specific instances when She did it in detail after she said she didn't remember. I should have just taken the hint and said literally anything else. Straight up telling her I like feet would have been better because at least then she wouldn't automatically think it's about her. We haven't texted each other since and I don't know what to think.
00:13:44
Speaker
um Look, I am not one for kink shaming. You do you, boo. But I imagine someone from like grade school messaging you out of the blue and being like, do you remember that time I smelled your feet?
00:14:02
Speaker
But also, how did she forget something like that? It was like her- She did not forget. She's no way she forgot. Okay. You think she's just being like, oh my God, like LOL, like what? Yeah. It's like, okay, so I do this where like someone will break something up and I'd be like, I don't remember that when I clearly remember it, but it just gives me so much of the ick that I did that, that I just want to forget it from my memory.
00:14:24
Speaker
No, very true. Sometimes my mom will bring up stuff that I did when I was really little. like i used to When I was like really young, I used to take like the gum from underneath the tables. I'm talking like I was like probably like four. And I didn't know that it was gum that people had already been chewing, that they would like stick underneath tables. And I would eat them. I would like eat i would like put them in my mouth. Because I was like, oh, let's find one that has flavor still.
00:14:50
Speaker
And my mom brought that up to me and I was like, I don't know what you're talking about lady. Like I didn't, I didn't do that. So I mean, yeah, I mean, sometimes you just don't, you don't want to bring up things that are from the past that are icky. I literally.
00:15:08
Speaker
Yeah, that was so gross. the I mean, I remember not knowing that either, like that it's gum. And I remember thinking like, oh, the texture feels really nice. it's Kind of like putty, you know? Yeah. Not shaming that. No, I get it. I'm i'm right there with four year old Gabby.
00:15:30
Speaker
I appreciate it. i People are probably listening like, what the hell? um But no, I mean, back to this confession, though. like i First of all, not king shaming. I think we're all into things. I've i've contemplated selling feet pics because, like hey, I heard people make a good living off of that. But that is hella embarrassing, though, like for that person to be like, Oh, I don't remember. And then to go into detail about two specific moments that you remember happening just shows how much you've been thinking about it over the last like whatever 20 years of your life and had like a significant impact.
00:16:06
Speaker
I'm curious too like is it just her feet you know or is it just feet in general like is it this one instance that you're really fixated on with this one person or did this like create like a birth a new kink for you?
00:16:23
Speaker
I mean, I feel like from what I'm seeing in this like little in the text, like I feel like it was like that kicked off the foot kink. That was his sexual foot kink awakening moment. And then it's been just like i guess uphill from there.
00:16:42
Speaker
Yeah, it's interesting because i like I remember first learning about people who have foot fetishes and I just truly did not get them. And I realize now that I think it's not so much about the feet specifically, or maybe it is. I mean, I don't know. But my theory is that it's not about the feet than it is about like the freakiness of what you are interested in. That's more of like the turn on.
00:17:06
Speaker
Yeah, no, I feel that way too. I can i can agree with that. So to our foot-loving kinkster, I hope that you get a text back from this woman, but I wouldn't count on it. It doesn't sound like she wants to relive that moment. But you do you. Find those feet. Like, enjoy life. Live it to the fullest. Yolo, you could die tomorrow. Just, like, enjoy your feet. No shame.
00:17:30
Speaker
When was the last time that you let yourself really have fun? I mean really have fun. That pure unapologetic, goofy, silly, adventurous kind of fun that you used to have before you became that responsible adult. Look, we all know you're reaching those KPOs at work. You're showing up to Pilates. You're taking care of your kids. You're doing that self-growth work, and all of that is great. But you also need to give yourself time to throw it to the wind and just play. That's just as important when it comes to creating a life that feels joyful and expansive. And that is what Camp Mugen is all about.
00:18:04
Speaker
Camp Eugen is the adult summer camp experience for women by women. We are passionate about bringing women together in community to play, create, travel, and have incredible adventures all while nurturing and healing the inner child. With curated, all-inclusive luxury trips around the world, Camp Eugen will transport you to a whole new world and all you have to do is show up. We take care of everything from breathtaking accommodations to gourmet food, exotic excursions, healing workshops, creative activities, transportation, and of course, pajama parties. Our next trip is coming up in May 2025 for our session in the south of France and we would love to see you there. You'll be staying at a gorgeous 18th century chateau where you can live out your princess dreams and enjoying activities like daily yoga, breathwork, hiking, horseback riding, crafting, visiting local castles, eating chef prepared meals, enjoying the pool in the sunshine with your new group of besties and so much more. Give yourself the gift of relaxation and play and join us today.
00:19:07
Speaker
visit www.campyugin.com slash May 2025 to book your suite and get ready for the adventure of a lifetime. That's www.campyugen.com slash May 2025. See you in France.
00:19:26
Speaker
All right, here's another one. um And this one, I don't know what this says about me, that it's like, I feel like I can relate to this, so you tell me. Okay, so this confession is, I wish I had a stalker. Like, like deeply. I just want to feel followed around and obsessed over.
00:19:49
Speaker
Honestly, same. Yeah, right. I don't want a dangerous stalker. like I don't want someone who's like stalking me because they want to hurt me. But like to be obsessed over, like who doesn't want that? Well, I think, OK, have you ever seen Fifty Shades of Grey? Yes.
00:20:06
Speaker
Okay, so I would say Christian Grey is a borderline stalker. There's a fine line between someone who's courting you and then someone who's stalking you. And I think if that just it's a matter of if he's a really hot man.
00:20:20
Speaker
ah it's hot If he's hot and he's wanted, then it's like, oh, he's like courting me. But then if he's like a creepy dude, it's like, oh, all of a sudden he's becoming a stalker. that's true labels are important and looks do and have an impact on that yeah if you have like the sexiest man who's like a millionaire or billionaire like stalking you and he all he wants to do is like tie you up and like do nice things to you like i don't know that's not a bad thing it's a good stalker um but if It sounds like my future husband to me. I love love that. Wait, do you mean Jay or don't tell Jay that? No, just in general. Just in general. Did stalk you when you guys first started dating or was it pretty casual?
00:21:03
Speaker
It was, I mean, I wouldn't say stalking. I would say it's like just more of like a courting, like a traditional courting situation. um But I don't know. I've always felt like we were just like best friends and then it just like organically turned into dating. But just generally like I've i've always thought about if I was like in Anastasia Steele's shoes and I would be like,
00:21:31
Speaker
You know, yes, it kind of feels stalkerish, but also like you're stalking me in your jet, like, okay, keep stalking me. like No problem. Like, I'm just going to pretend like I don't care, you know, and then like, eventually, like, I'll be like, ah fine, fine.
00:21:47
Speaker
I do think too, like I was reading this book around the psychology of like BDSM and kink and how we essentially enjoy things that are quote unquote bad or like not good for us. And there is like an aspect of our cycle, like our psyche that really, really like craves that. And so I feel like it removed a lot of shame around what I'm interested in what and what I like to do. Because I think growing up, especially like if women are into things like that, that are like kinkier, it's considered like a super like taboo thing, you know? Yeah, definitely. I mean, I remember like growing up in a time where it was like, I i think I was like in middle school, like in the early 2000s, and it was like that whole kind of women sexual revolution, like we're going to show all our skin and it's about us having like our freedom and like being able to be sexy without shame and like our sexuality is important and it was like being discussed. And it was such a like huge thing, like
00:22:47
Speaker
Christina Aguilera, her dirty video when it came out. like I just remember everybody being like, oh my god. like She's wearing assless chaps. She's like running around like were in the water like surrounded by men. And like how crazy is this?
00:23:05
Speaker
And now that feels so vanilla in comparison because we're so much more open now, I think, than we used to be, especially when it comes to women, you know, exploring what their sexual fantasies are. And and even like kink and BDSM and all of that is like now so much more mainstream. But the good news is, is like you said, it like removes that shame aspect. And I think like It also creates safety when you can have conversations around this stuff in a healthy way. Like you can talk to your partner, negotiate boundaries, limits, like have like, you know, some kind of structure around the way that you explore some of these things. Because I think in the past, like there are a lot of women who have been taken advantage of by like people who wanted to do some of this stuff, um but not in a, you know, ethical way.
00:23:54
Speaker
Yeah, absolutely. And I also see a rise in like girl like book girlies who love to read smut. Like literally me too. Same. um And I think it's like really cool to see that kind of unfold for a lot of people because it's not that women don't like to watch those kinds of things, but maybe they just need to consume it in a different format like books.
00:24:21
Speaker
Yeah, definitely. I mean, I am on the second book of the ACOTAR series. I don't know if you've read that one.
00:24:29
Speaker
Book talk, thank you. Book talk is my best friend, honestly. um it's Have you read Verity by Colleen Hooper? No, it's on my list. I heard it's pretty good. It's probably one of my favorite books I've ever read. It's so good. We should start a book club, too, while we're at it. I love it. Yeah, just add on another.
00:24:51
Speaker
and Just like another thing for, no, we're gonna be too overwhelmed. um Okay, awesome. All right, now to our next one and probably our last one for today. This one's a little bit of a heart, you know, heart jerker, tear jerker. It definitely made me feel like, oh, you know, and also like relatable.
Toxic Relationships and Self-Love
00:25:11
Speaker
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00:26:02
Speaker
And for a limited time, just because you're listening to this podcast, you can get 10% off Just Use the Code podcast at checkout. It's time to reclaim your happiness. Your future self is waiting. um Okay, so this person shared, um it's been a year and yet still somehow I just still really desire my awful, abusive, disordered ex.
00:26:25
Speaker
the toxic ex. People are so complicated. He's all those things, but he's also just so beautiful, at least to me. Even with his graying hairs and tired eyes, I still see that 34-year-old buff, handsome man. He can be supremely fun. When things are good, we have such amazing chemistry, yet he always chooses Mr. Hyde. It absolutely breaks my heart, my mistake to rendezvous with him, and I'll pay in sadness.
00:26:53
Speaker
and longing for the next few weeks. So it looks like she got back with him for a quick rendezvous and, you know, it didn't end well. So I don't know. The toxic ex is always something that I think. What's so attractive about that? I mean, it's like the pattern, right? It's just like it's what feels the most familiar and especially like throw in the fact that you've dated this person. It It feels a lot less scary to date someone that's really familiar than it is to like, potentially meet someone who's really good for you and then
00:27:29
Speaker
like feel into the stability that feels like wildly uncomfortable because you're not used to it, you know? hu Yeah, definitely. And I think too, like there's, you know, we're both trauma survivors. And I think like one of the hallmarks of someone with relational trauma, and even sexual trauma, right? It's like,
00:27:51
Speaker
What's familiar is actually what's dangerous and we're constantly unconsciously drawn To people that are not good for us because it gives us this level of chaos in our lives um That feels safe because it's familiar It doesn't feel good if but to our nervous system to our unconscious mind. It's like oh, this is the devil I know and not the devil I don't, which is a healthy relationship. So a lot of us will find ourselves getting back with toxic exes or getting into ah like abusive relationships with like narcissists or with just people who like do not treat us well. And even though we're miserable, we like can't leave or we keep going back. And I know like for myself, that's been true. I know that for clients I've worked with, that's been true. I think until you learn how to love yourself and break that cycle and like create safety,
00:28:45
Speaker
in a healthy relationship dynamic, you're going to keep repeating the same patterns over and over and over again. And eventually, I don't know, I feel like it destroys a person if not like, like physically, also emotionally, you know, mentally and all the above. Yeah, no, absolutely. And I also think a lot of that has to do with like the relationship that you have with yourself, because ultimately, that just ends up becoming a mirror to everything else that you're in a relationship with or all the people that you're in relationships with. and I think when you come to a place of like truly believing that you are not worthy of this kind of love, like if you are in that kind of place because you have been shown that in the past, when you are in like a healthy relationship, it doesn't feel safe. like It truly doesn't.
00:29:31
Speaker
Yeah. I mean, i I definitely, definitely have had my fair share of experiences in that realm. I think too, like for me personally, there was this element of like, I loved the broken birds. Like I felt like I can give you the love and this kind of incredible sense of belonging that I know you're craving and needing because you're a broken bird and like let me come and and save you. Let me come and save you. And it wasn't until I went through like a lot of therapy that I really recognize that that came from a place of me wanting to be saved at a time when you know I was much younger and like not really being saved and then craving that experience and reliving it with a like a partner that I could give that to and in ways in like an unconscious way kind of try to heal that old childhood wound. Yeah, absolutely. I totally resonate with that. I think like we so deeply crave
00:30:29
Speaker
to be saved. And so that's like how we extend ourselves to other people, which, you know, it's such a human thing for us to do. It's like, Oh, let me save you because all I want is to be saved in the situation unconsciously. I really resonate with that for sure.
00:30:45
Speaker
Yeah. And I think hopefully if you're listening and this has been your experience too, like you can break the cycle. You can break this pattern. It just takes like a lot of self-love work. It's not about relationship work. It's about learning how to give yourself so much love that you will not tolerate anything less from anybody else. A hundred percent. Yeah. I think a lot of what a lot of people end up doing is like, Oh, we just need to go to couples therapy. It's like, no, like there's probably a lot more internally that you need to work on with yourself and the relationship that you have with yourself, the capacity in which you are able to experience joy and pleasure and all of those things and being able to feel safe in receiving that.
00:31:23
Speaker
Yeah, 100%. Guys, I am not a lawyer and I am not going to pretend to be, but I do run a really, really profitable coaching business with lots of things like retreats, one-on-one mentorship, group programs, online programs, and much more. So it's really important that I protect myself with the right legal documentation. That's why I go to Coaches & Company. They have easy-to-read, lawyer-created contracts without the law firm price tag.
00:31:49
Speaker
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00:32:17
Speaker
Well, OK, I don't want to end on a tearjerker, so I'll end with a funny one so that we can just lift your spirits up. um This is a one-liner confession. I have the weird urge to be kidnapped by someone.
00:32:36
Speaker
yeah The psychologist in me is kind of like, we should dig into that. but yeah like We should explore that. But the human in me is like, honestly, I used to think that as a kid because I watched like so many true crime, like documentaries and stuff like I was, I would always just wonder like, I bet I could like survive being kidnapped. he's like Oh my god, what and like what the fuck?
00:33:01
Speaker
No, actually that's weird, me too. I had those like ideas like this is what I would do and like this is how I would get out and like blah, blah, blah. And I've also seen so many really funny videos that people have made about how they would be the most annoying kidnapping victim and not gonna lie, that's a tactic. That's a tactic, be so annoying they don't wanna kidnap you anymore.
00:33:19
Speaker
I've seen where if people are like, if somebody tries to kidnap you, just start barking. And like, they'll like kick you back out of their van. because they don't want They're like, Oh, fuck, I got a crazy one. mind but Like, oh God, gotta get rid of this one. um Yeah, I hope I'm never kidnapped in real life. But I feel like I have enough data from all these true crime shows that like, I could probably figure it out.
00:33:45
Speaker
Like we'd become like either best friends or I would be so weird that they would be forced to get rid of me and not kill me, but just like, you know, like just be like drop me off somewhere. Oh, just kidding. I take it back. yeah Just kidding. I can I return you like I don't know. Oh man.
00:34:01
Speaker
ah Well, okay. Well, those are our confessions for today.
Invitation for Listener Confessions
00:34:05
Speaker
If you guys want to submit your confessions, we would love to hear about them. um I think I'm going to create like a little info form where you can submit your anonymous ah confessions to us. And so I'll drop that in the show notes. And if you would like to just let something off your chest,
00:34:23
Speaker
Please drop it in here. We will not share your name or any information, but we'll talk about it and hopefully have a little laugh together. And OK, until next time, you guys, thanks for listening. Diane, it's always fun to meet up with you and chat about this stuff and we'll see what happens next time. See you next time.