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#36: Snow + Disney ≠ Fairytale!
32 Plays3 months ago
#36: Snow + Disney ≠ Fairytale!
It’s the aftermath of Winter Storm Fern and Francis wants to know why on earth the bike lane is plowed but not the streets or parking spots? Of course Jessica is obsessed with Heated Rivalry and somehow she’s still harboring Cesar the foster dog. We get a Disney trip update, a Jetblue fail and Jessica surprises Francis by guessing 2/3 of the dad jokes. She’s on a roll!
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Transcript
Introduction and Hosts' Personal Anecdotes
00:00:01
Speaker
ye From a makeshift recording studio in Brooklyn, welcome to The Grocery Stick with Jessica and Francis. Shut the front door. That is not what we agreed upon. Francis and Jessica. Meh, ignore that.
00:00:13
Speaker
We're Brooklynites and friends. We're here to talk, laugh, commiserate, and argue about all things travel sports-related, kid-related, and plain old life-related. It's Francis and Jessica, or I quit.
00:00:23
Speaker
Go. go so yeah episode talking like this because...
00:00:30
Speaker
i am talking like this because For the last four days, I seem to have picked up a stuffy nose and I've lost half my voice. Gross, sorry. But no other symptoms.
00:00:46
Speaker
No fever. No runny nose. No cough. That's weird. No body aches. Yeah. Stuffy nose. And I've lost half my voice. going have to whisper this entire episode 36.
00:01:01
Speaker
Should we both whisper? Maybe we should both whisper. I think I'll be overpowering if they don't whisper. People just freaking delete, delete, delete.
Debate on Oatmeal Preparation Technique
00:01:12
Speaker
And I had my oatmeal.
00:01:14
Speaker
Did you have it plain? had it plain. Oh, dude. And my sister from another mister in Vancouver, God sister, said, after you put hot water, let it cool down, new kid again for 30 seconds.
00:01:30
Speaker
It turns creamy, which it does. Okay. It still tastes like shit. Because it's plain. Yeah. It's plain water. it's You know what it's like? That's like, I think, the recipe for gruel.
00:01:43
Speaker
yeah. Like what they serve in Serbian prisons. and Not Serbian. Records. Yeah. That. Exactly. i was going say Siberian prisons. Yeah. I went with Serbian. Totally different place. So no i tortured myself. And like I said, if I put it in my mouth, if I shovel it in and swallow it really fast,
00:02:04
Speaker
and I drink coffee in between, it's manageable. Why don't you just make the oatmeal with coffee? Ooh. No. Dude. You think? I mean, effectively, that's what you're doing anyway. You're taking plain oatmeal made with water, shoving it in your mouth, putting some coffee in your mouth, and drinking it down.
00:02:24
Speaker
That's true, but... Make it like mocha. Just, you know, sip the coffee, it's black, it's flavorful, and then quickly shovel like three spoons of oatmeal and do it again. and And in like two minutes, the bowl is gone. Sounds like a prison sentence, literally. Sounds terrible. That's what old age is, man. It's like eating to live, not living to eat.
00:02:45
Speaker
Well, then the rest of the day I can go eat my potato chips and fried chicken and shit. I don't know how you find that. That's like writing your own rules. i Yeah. You know what? have omeal like i need all the Listen, we're going to find out in about a month whether this is working because I have my physical and we're going to see whether my cholesterol has changed. Was this a prescription from your doctor or this something that you did on your own? Internet doctor Francis.
00:03:11
Speaker
Oh, yes. You're MD from Grey's Anatomy. I see. Yep. I That's what it is. So we're going to find out whether or not i should get my board certification for high cholesterol and nutrition.
00:03:28
Speaker
nutrition? Sweet. Yep. We're going to find out. Yeah. So. Sweet, sweet,
Winter Challenges in New York City
00:03:34
Speaker
sweet. It's freaking cold. It is colder than the last episode recorded. It is now negative Fahrenheit.
00:03:42
Speaker
Yeah. It was like seven degrees, I think, this morning when I went out. that's the I went out at 8 a.m. Yeah, that's like that's like the that's the headline, but with the wind. Oh, yeah, no. It's definitely negative. Yeah, yeah, I don't have my math in front of me right now, but that's probably about minus 25 or 30 Celsius. It is cold. It's cold. People.
00:04:02
Speaker
Yeah. And there's more snow in the way maybe this weekend. Yeah. yeah maybe Yeah. People are talking about it, but i you know I looked at my weather app a couple times and I don't see on weather app. no That doesn't mean it's not going to happen.
00:04:17
Speaker
Weather is an extremely impermanent science. It's going to be small. going couple inches. It's not going to like... Yeah, but honestly, let's add some intel to injury here. Right? I mean, the truth is, is having this much snow in New York City is miserable for me. i mean, I'm not going to speak for everybody else, although I got to tell you, I don't see a lot of happy people rolling around unless they're like in snow pants and under the age of 12. So i went to hockey yesterday. I came back and went to Billy to draw off Evan's blades. That's my usual path at night.
00:04:49
Speaker
And where did you have to go for hockey? Oh, Hotchkiss. Oh, okay. It was home. Yeah. And...
00:04:58
Speaker
Nothing. i mean, the roads are sort of plowed. And of course, all the parked cars are blocked. So that's stupid thing number one. It's like you need to enforce people moving cars so the plow can get in there once and really clear it.
00:05:12
Speaker
But they don't. And that's kind of the problem because there's a swath of open parking that wasn't even taken for the storm here. right And snow is piled in those spaces. And I see the plows and the front loaders and none of them are just swooping in and moving it to the corners.
00:05:27
Speaker
And, but even the sidewalks, I'm like, people people have shoveled their sidewalks, but the city, in its infinite wisdom, hasn't come to each street corner. Mm-hmm.
00:05:41
Speaker
So... I'm a fairly able-bodied person in the proper snow gear. Except for your cholesterol. Except for cholesterol. And even I almost fell trying to navigate the piles of snow just to get to the sidewalk. Yeah. Yeah. The corners are problem. no old people or anybody who's mobility challenged getting out and about. No. And strollers. Strollers also. Like i've I've offered to carry strollers yeah over the corners for people. because i'm Okay, but- Here's the most Brooklyn, have to laugh, don't know this happens anywhere else. Am gonna or am gonna be mean about this? This is the most Brooklyn thing that I've seen.
00:06:20
Speaker
So Monday, after the storm has settled, and nothing's really been plowed yet, I drive my wife to work because this the trains aren't running properly, and like i see this guy in a mini bobcat.
00:06:36
Speaker
You know what that is? Oh, I do. little tractor, right? Yeah, yeah. I want to know who he is and if can hire him. I'm like, oh, man. This guy's on it. He's at the intersection. This is awesome. When I come back, a lot of this, I mean, the cars are the cars, but a lot of the snow will be moved. This is freaking awesome.
00:06:53
Speaker
I drive. It's like 7 a.m. And I come back. Everything is still there. I'm like, what the fuck did this guy do all morning? And then I pull into the garage and I go, oh, I know what he did.
00:07:10
Speaker
he fucking cleared the bike lane. Oh.
00:07:16
Speaker
I'm like, fuck you guys. Fuck the city. Yeah. Fuck the mayor. That's a testament to the city. And um then I was like, where is this mini bobcat parked all year?
00:07:28
Speaker
Right. Right? Two, who in their infinite wisdom, wherever it's parked, has to tow it on the trailer h to, let's say, downtown Brooklyn where I live. I bet it's i bet it's stored locally.
00:07:42
Speaker
You think? Where? Yeah, i bet it is I bet it's stored locally in a garage. for this occasion, and then three, pulls it out and clears the bike lane and nothing else.
00:07:53
Speaker
like If you work for the city, is that your job? I only clear the bike lane. I'm the bike lane guy. i think That's my job. I think they're following instructions. Like like i said, I've seen dude plows go by, like pass right by blocks, like almost whole blocks of places that people could park. The city wants to eliminate cars. This is a really good way to encourage people to not drive. Right. Piles the snow up against more cars. Right. But then what's going to happen is on February 1st, the suspension of alternate side will go away. And then what the they'll do is they'll swoop in and they'll ticket the entire city for revenue. Because they can't get the car out. Right. right I was like, okay.
00:08:35
Speaker
I mean, I was kind of chuckling and then I was kind of like mad for a bit. And I was like, and it's such a fucking lefty thing to do. The bike lane is very important. For who? Nobody is riding. i ride my bike. I love riding city bikes. Yeah. Even if you plow that bike lane, I'm not riding on the ice as leftover. I've seen people.
00:08:54
Speaker
I've seen people. I get it. Which I think is crazy. Well, the irony is, here's the irony. If you ride a bike or you drive a car, yeah you need a layer of snow to drive on.
00:09:05
Speaker
because that creates friction and that gives you grip. you plow it all and you leave ice, you fuck everybody. Yeah, no, it's ah it's a recipe for disaster. Anyways. I don't know. I've seen people riding their bikes and I think they're bananas.
00:09:20
Speaker
Yeah, I mean, and the a and and God bless the delivery guys who are still delivering food in the storm. Yeah, but they're on like mopeds. They're not on like bikes. That's fair. There's more traction from motorbike than there is from a regular e-bike or a bicycle.
00:09:34
Speaker
So anyways, new mayor, big fail. Thank you to the for clearing the bike lane and fucking all the other traffic in from three lanes into one lane. Yeah. i I thought it was really funny, though. Did you see his ah his press conference about the storm when it was coming?
00:09:47
Speaker
And how he encouraged New Yorkers to stay home. Oh, i'll that's smart. I'm going to find the soundbite for you, though, because I think it's really hilarious. Stay home. Stay home. Take a nap. Right.
00:09:58
Speaker
Read a book. Take advantage of the New York City Public Library's e-book program where you can read Heated Rivalry. oh nice. For free. Free.
00:10:09
Speaker
Do you know Heated Rivalry, or are you living under a rock?
TV Show Discussions: Heated Rivalry and Representation in Films
00:10:12
Speaker
I know it. Okay. Have you watched it? It's produced by Canadians. It is. It's
00:10:19
Speaker
It is a Canadian show. have not watched it. Okay. have not watched it. And I didn't know there were books. So it's technically it's a series of seven books. Oh, okay. This particular story that they've taken for this TV show yeah is really three of the books with the first book interwoven in between as another sub-storyline.
00:10:41
Speaker
Okay. um I have watched the show. Okay. I, like a gajillion other women yeah in this country right now, are obsessed yes with heated rivalry. That is what I've heard. Shane and Ilya.
00:10:54
Speaker
Yeah. Hollander and Rosanoff. I saw them briefly. They were at the Golden Globes on TV. And they made a joke. It was a very beginning. to me There they are.
00:11:06
Speaker
um But yeah, on the radio, all the straight women are like, whoa. We know it's about gay hockey players, but dude, those guys. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Well, you know, it's funny. There was a psychologist or a psychiatrist. I think it it may have been Esther Perel who came out and was acknowledging the obsession. Yeah. um About heated rivalry. Yeah. Specifically by by women. Right.
00:11:32
Speaker
Yeah. and Hey, whatever works. She said that one of the reasons that she believes women are so obsessed is that in the storyline, everything that women want to come true and wish for these characters comes true. Oh, okay.
00:11:49
Speaker
And so that's why there's this kinship. Exactly. Exactly. Well, I don't want to ruin it. So I'm not going to... I'm not going to watch it. i don't have time for that shit. Well, but I don't know who else is going to listen. Oh, might right. You might want to watch it. so i'm gonna we're going to revisit. No, we'll revisit. Okay. is it okay This is the first time we're talking about it. Okay. So I don't want to blow the story We can give spoiler alerts next time and say, okay, turn off now, pause, fast forward three minutes and 50 seconds and then come back whatever it is. Okay.
00:12:19
Speaker
Fair. Did you hear what I did there? Did you hear it? Did you hear it? don't want to blow the storyline. you hear it? Did you hear it? got it. ah Okay. Well. Yes. We have kids. and It's racy. It's racy. Yeah, as I heard. It's, it's um you know, I had to explain to Ruthie, who's watched it also four times, right? I mean, i don't know it anybody I don't know anybody in my immediate circle who's only watched it one time and moved on. No kidding.
00:12:48
Speaker
Yeah. Like, I mean, like, obsessed. It's good. It's competitive and racy. Yeah. But it's more than that. It's like the vulnerability, the relationship, the the experience that some of these men have coming out of the closet and trying or like trying to hide who they are and their identities in that area. I'm assuming the protagonists yeah are gay in real life.
00:13:14
Speaker
I know for sure. Because can't, heaven forbid, you have a straight guy playing a gay person in... Hollywood these days. Yeah. I feel like... Right. I feel like it could happen. I feel like that's not something that... you knows I don't think it's a checklist criteria. think so? I think... But I think there's more authenticity if... Well... Okay.
00:13:36
Speaker
Rather than spectacular acting, I feel like there's probably more authenticity if you have bi or gay actors playing gay parts. But like in today's world, where everybody's sensitive and always claiming... What is the word do they use? Who?
00:13:50
Speaker
it went over the use What is that word they use where a white person and plays an Asian person? What is that word they use? Oh, it's... um Well, there's several, actually. But one of – there's co-opting. That's it. There's co-opting. There's cosplaying. There's – I know the word you're thinking of.
00:14:15
Speaker
Appropriating. there's Misappropriating. Misappropriating. That's the word. Everyone's been using in Hollywood. Okay. So Brokeback Mountain. Loved it. Did you see it?
00:14:25
Speaker
Great movie. Loved it. But like in today's world – Yeah. Jake Gyllenhaal and Heath Ledger, they don't get to make that movie because they're not gay. Correct. I think that they don't get the parts right now rather than, what was it, 20 years ago, right? Yeah.
00:14:40
Speaker
But great movie. Yeah. Which I think is bullshit because the truth of the matter is is if you look back on that movie now yeah and you try and think of two – um relevant actors yeah currently who are gay who could successfully fulfill those roles in the same way. I couldn't pick. why that's my point. I couldn't pick them out. i'd have that I'd have to be like, no, there's no authenticity in it. It's got to be Heath Ledger and it's got to be Jake Gyllenhaal. So does that movie get made today with no names and it's a bust? I don't know.
00:15:09
Speaker
Anyways. i don't I think though there are more famous actors now who are out that are gay yeah than there were then. i think most of them are like funny people. I feel like. Are they funny? A serious actor. Like who? No, like, okay, extreme example, like Sean Hayes.
00:15:27
Speaker
I love but he's comeic But he's a comedic actor. He's comedic, right? I've never seen him in anything serious. Understood. people i think he wants to, think he said he wants to, but whatever. Matt Bomber. Matt Bomber.
00:15:38
Speaker
So Matt Bomber was the guy in Fifty Shades of Grey. I've watched He also, why was he Suits? I think maybe he was one of the roles. Suits? No way. The other guy? Suits I love.
00:15:51
Speaker
I'll have to see. Really? But Matt Balmer's gay. And I think that in retrospect, he could pull off a gay role. Right. I don't know that he can pull off cowboy gay role. like close And maybe it's a Hollywood thing. It's like, then you have like...
00:16:08
Speaker
Modern family. Right. More comedic gay people. a couple Nice, good actors. Yeah. I'm trying to think of like serious. I bet you can't find one. No, I will. Matt Balmer is one of them. But like have to. People yelling at us right now. We know. Here are seven names. Totally. fuck but i But I didn't, you know what? I didn't prepare for this part of this conversation. So I, you know, and I don't want to click in the background because I know how much you love that when I like look shit up while we're talking. Yeah.
00:16:35
Speaker
Between that and my, for everyone else, if you hear heavy breathing, it's not the dogs. It's me because I have stuffy nose and I'm losing half my voice. I'm breathing and speaking at the same time.
00:16:46
Speaker
You should put on a mask and breathe like Darth Vader. Yeah, should. I mean, stop trying to hide it. Just be who you are right now. Maybe we should turn this into like a video podcast like everyone else and start doing stupid shit like that. Maybe we get more followers. i mean, I'd have to shower beforehand, but sure.
00:17:02
Speaker
and have to do my makeup every day. But that's okay. I could do that. You know what? It would give me a reason to get my shit together. Sometimes you just need a reason. oh Maybe you need that reason.
00:17:12
Speaker
Back it up. How was, you're still walking two dogs? Oh, yeah. Okay. And so, hang on. Well, it's worse now. Well, wait.
00:17:23
Speaker
For all the listeners, remember what I asked? Was it last episode or two episodes ago? You're supposed to get rid of this dog. Not getting rid of the dog. I love him. Now you're not getting rid of the dog. No. And he's decompressing. doesn't play well with your original dog. No, no. He's doing great with my original dog. Now he's doing great with the original dog. He was always great with the original dog. No. What wasn't great with was my kid.
00:17:42
Speaker
Oh, okay. Fair. Which was worse. That's not true. you said that You said that there was some like... There was some drama. No, forget your daughter for a second. The new dog was too playful, overly playful with your older dog. yeah. He corrected him twice and now they're fine. Okay. And so now you your daughter who's the new dog snipped that or tried to bite.
00:18:02
Speaker
Yes. Three times. And then you called rescue and said, oh, wait. And then he's got health problems. Yeah. Lumps. Yeah. needs surgery. He's a mess. Then you called the rescue said, hey,
00:18:17
Speaker
we need a doctor quick or a new home because of your daughter's fight thing. And now fast forward after all that, you're telling me everything's kosher. Yeah. Everything's fine. Yeah. Well, so he okay growls when people walk into the living room. Okay. And if I'm sitting on the couch specifically. Okay. So now when people come down, they either turn the other direction and then swing back around and come back in the stairs. Yeah. Or if they come downstairs and I see it on him, cause I can, I can read him yeah pretty well. Yeah. um
00:18:49
Speaker
If they come down the stairs and I see it on him, I get up and I walk out of the room. Do you know how ridiculous that sounds to me now? And I'm not, Yeah, I know. i'm I mean, had pets growing up. But it's all about conditioning. i know, but now you're thou you and your family are changing your behavior yes for the dog. Yes. But you guys are the people who
Pet Adoption Challenges
00:19:11
Speaker
live there. Right, all right. But that's what sometimes needs to be done with a rescue dog who needs decompression time. And people don't understand that. Like, that's why some dogs get picked up from a shelter. Right. And they spend 24 hours in someone's house and then they return them and like, oh, it's not a good fit. It's like, well, no, hold on.
00:19:28
Speaker
Yeah. You know, they they live in a shelter environment that's very high energy. It's extremely stressful. Yeah. For mine in particular, he was in that environment for 15 months after incurring amazing amounts of abuse.
00:19:41
Speaker
Right. So he's got a sordid history and he's damaged. And so. OK. Yeah. So like is your whole family going to continue this behavior indefinitely? It's not indefinite. It's just it's a counter conditioner.
00:19:54
Speaker
Oh. So it's a counter conditioner. It's just like, okay, if that's the way he's going to behave, right then he doesn't get to sit next to me. So I get up and I leave. And so the next time it happens, if he's not growling, I stay.
00:20:08
Speaker
Nice. So you can train him, retrain him. Right. It's called counter conditioning. Okay, hang on. So let me do this. So you're sitting in so far, blah, blah.
00:20:20
Speaker
Someone comes down. He growls. Yeah. What do you do? You push him away? No, I get up. I don't touch him. I don't touch him. I don't mess with him. I get up and I walk out of the room. You know, what it's no big deal. I go, I get myself a glass of water. I come back.
00:20:32
Speaker
When you do that, what does he do? Well, when he does when he does that, does he he died he died he'll either get up and follow me or he'll stay on the couch and wait for somebody else to come over and pet him where his tail's wagging and he realizes that he's safe. okay um But the message it's sending is if you're going to growl while I'm sitting next to you, then you don't get to sit next to me.
00:20:54
Speaker
Right. Okay. So like there's risk reward, right? Yeah. So if you don't growl and I stay, the reward is that I've stayed. Right. So it's it's, you know, dogs, they have like the mentality of two, three-year-old toddlers.
00:21:07
Speaker
That's a egotistical to you though, to think that you're the reward. I am the reward, baby. All the time. All the time. You take the risk and I'm the reward. Okay. all right all right fair All right. Fair. Fair. sin but ok with war With him, it's become more prevalent and more obvious because he's he's chosen me as this person because I make him feel safe. Yes. I'm his security. Fair. Okay. So if he's sitting next to me yeah and he's growling, he's protecting what he thinks is is his security, his safe space. Understood. Not realizing that the safe space is also safe if I'm not sitting in it.
00:21:44
Speaker
And so for me to get up and move and for him to settle in and still feel safe when someone else walks in the room is sending the message that you're safe and you're not at risk even if I'm not in the room.
00:21:55
Speaker
You're fine. So that aside. Yes. Okay. Do you now officially have two dogs? No, he's still a foster dog. He's still a foster dog. He's still a foster dog. But I mean, no lumps.
00:22:07
Speaker
No, they're still there because I still have to address that with them. And i you know, at a certain point I was just going to go and do it. Just be like, okay, I'm just doing it. Forget What I think they're hoping. Yeah. um And that's kind of, I think, yeah, that's kind of what someone else said. And and when he was pulled from the shelter, yeah you know, they were promising, you know, some kind of fundraiser to have it removed or checked out and no one's done anything, which is part of the reason, you know, that rescues will have a bad rap. Yeah.
00:22:39
Speaker
Because, you know, like the same way as when, you know, people were looking for him to get pulled and for him to get rescued. Yeah. um You know, they advertised him as a Labrador.
00:22:52
Speaker
Right. Two Labradors need rescuing after being held as evidence, abused, blah, blah, blah, blah. blah Yeah. And, you know, I raised my hand i'm like, okay, you know, whatever. and um only then to be sent a photo where I look at and go, that ain't no Labrador. Right.
00:23:09
Speaker
Like Caesar is not a Labrador. Caesar is a pit bull. He is a dog that is a black pit bull and people cross the fucking street when they see me walking him. Yeah. Even though he short and stout, he's 50 pounds ish, 53 pounds.
00:23:25
Speaker
nature's Nature is nature. And loves people. That's what every pet owner says until their dog attacks something for some reason. Well, dogs, you know, look, they don't love everything.
00:23:35
Speaker
Yeah. Just like people, right? Like they are going to be selective. Okay. Some dogs are, you know, um really docile and extremely submissive and they'll put up with, you know, crap all the time. But like there was a dog that passed by yesterday, a dachshund, He was a menacing dog in the neighborhood. Just barks and everything. Lunges and everything.
00:23:55
Speaker
And I saw him coming with his owner and I pulled into like a stairwell to let them go knowing. Yeah. Right. um And like I said, Caesar's not my dog yet. Yeah. You know, he's still a foster dog. So I have to be really careful because he's, I don't have ownership over him. Yep.
00:24:11
Speaker
And so I pull over into this stairwell and she somehow doesn't see me. This woman, like some of these people are so vapid. It's really something. Yeah. And she walks by and her dog lunges. Okay. And sees her instead of getting curious or like fighting back, leans into me and starts shaking.
00:24:29
Speaker
Oh, I see. Like he does he doesn't want any trouble. This dog does not want any trouble. He just is happy. He's grateful. He doesn't want anything. He just wants to play. He wants to live his life. He wants to eat good meals. He wants to have affection and warmth.
00:24:42
Speaker
And, you know, hopefully, you know. Okay. Hopefully some healthcare at some point. So, okay. But what I was getting at is he's a seven-year-old black pit bull that has mast cell cancer. like No one's clamoring to adopt him. Nobody's clamoring to take over foster ship. that's what I'm getting at. yeah Yeah. So, I mean, he could be a foster. He could be here forever.
00:25:04
Speaker
do do yeah think Yes. Yeah. That's what I'm getting at. That's what I think they're doing to you. cynically in me, the cynic in me, I think that they can do that to you and just pretend to forget that he's there yeah until you give him back or or or they just never come back for him. And so I only have one more question about this for you. And we'll do a period of updates for people who listen and care.
00:25:28
Speaker
so I have this bridge in Malaysia that I want to sell you. ah it's the You only need to give me $10,000 and I'll get the ownership rights for you.
00:25:40
Speaker
Perfect. Feel. to be You know what the thing is? is i I have invested money. I feed it. money like i just i feed yeah You know, I'm a already feeding it. Okay. Your time is worth money. You're not walking two dogs separately. Well, so here's the thing. put together now. Well, I was going to start walking them together and then the snow hit and it's icy. And so now I don't want to do it because they're they like super narrow pathways because for some reason people can't shovel a whole sidewalk. I know.
00:26:13
Speaker
I know. The width of the shovel. That's all you're going to get. Yeah, you get one push. One push all the way down right in the center. Yeah. So people don't shovel, technically, shovel their whole sidewalk. And I would argue also that the park hasn't done a great deal. no, they haven't done shit. A great deal of full... Yep.
00:26:33
Speaker
Plowing in air pathways. Thank you, people. Yeah, pretty much. um As you stated, the corners are a disaster. Right. And so for me right now, it doesn't benefit me. Yeah. Even if it takes me some extra time, it doesn't benefit me because I don't want to get hurt.
00:26:48
Speaker
So time is money. Yeah. So you haven't spent any money, you think, but you have. Yeah. Because now you're going twice in the Yeah, relatively. And you're feeding the dog. Yeah. Dogs eat a lot.
00:26:59
Speaker
Yeah, they eate twice a day. And... Okay. The jury's still out. We'll have yeah this update every week. Yeah. See what's going on. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sorry. I don't mean to be mean or laughing, now but I'm kind of laughing at you. No, I still don't have any regrets putting my hand up.
00:27:15
Speaker
Yeah. You're a good person. You're much better person than I am. Clearly. i appreciate that. I can admit that. No problem. I appreciate that. yeah I mean, I don't have any regrets. You know, I still firmly look at him and and believe yeah that, you know, uh, he had, ah you know, needed to have someone say okay, let's give you a second chance. There you go.
00:27:34
Speaker
Okay. and So that was me. That's a lot of crap because what I really want to talk to you about today is your trip to Disney. look
Travel Tales: Disney Adventures and JetBlue Frustrations
00:27:45
Speaker
yeah I love Disney. How awesome is Disney? You know, it's funny. I was like, I said to you, I was like, I can't call myself a Disney adult because I don't do like all like the the get ups and yeah yeah you know, and I'm not obsessed. Like I don't go four times a year. Like I don't, dude, you should see these people though. and i Seriously. I remember when the kids were four, we went there, and I was like, wow, there's some grown-ass adults here. Obsessed. Who are obsessed with Disney and get dressed up in Mickey and Minnie outfits. Yeah. And they're enjoying themselves a lot. And to be honest, for that like they're kind of cute. like Yeah. I'm like- They add, they're an, they're an ad value. They're not, they're not a negative source of of anything in this environment. Like in this environment, the thing is, is like, know, as someone who, who likes to go and enjoys the rides and yeah kind of like enjoys the culture, although I'm not, yeah I haven't dove in, I don't think headfirst, like I'm not that person and I've never been that person. um it, they make it, they make it a better experience. Yeah.
00:28:43
Speaker
Okay, so give us the highlights. I could give you the low light first. Okay, whatever you want to do. So going to start with the weather. I want to start with. did you Did your daughter skip school for this trip?
00:28:56
Speaker
No, we had regents week. Oh, right. No. The whole problem was that she literally had nine days, right including two weekends. No, 10 days, including two weekends of like nothing.
00:29:10
Speaker
Okay. Tick, ding. Did not skip school. No. All right. Run with your lowlights and then the highlights. that's The weather. Oh, what? Oh, yeah. was freezing. Right. Storm week. We were there for four days total from the day we flew until the day that we flew out. Yeah. Like total four days. So two days in between and really two travel days, I think. Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday. Yeah. um And on the way down. all right. So let me just start with the weather. And then I'm going to backtrack to JetBlue Airlines. Oh, no.
00:29:41
Speaker
Yeah. I leaned in nice and close for that. Damn. Um, so I was hoping to go down and have, you know, four mile days.
00:29:53
Speaker
Yeah. Didn't need to be hot. I was hoping 60 degrees. Yeah. Some reprieve that's from the super cold, right? Yeah. No.
00:30:04
Speaker
When we got up in the mornings to go out to breakfast and to start our days, 35 degrees. five degrees ah day So cold. Holy, that is cold for Florida. People are, they're like, well, okay.
00:30:20
Speaker
You should have seen Disney Springs. We went to Disney Springs the first day and I'm going to backtrack. That has to everything to do with JetBlue and I'll go through it. Okay, but then the the park is empty. It's cold. it was not empty at all. Shit. Really? it wasn't.
00:30:35
Speaker
Oh my God. It was far from empty. It was Martin Luther King weekend. Yeah. That Sunday and Monday. Right. And people extended, i think, their weekends. Okay. at yeah ESPN down there, there was a dance team cheer championships, the national championships. And so all the college teams were there.
00:30:55
Speaker
So like Michigan State, Michigan. West Virginia. Okay, that could be fun. Well, I mean, I didn't see any. just saw all the like the kids, yeah the college kids rolling around. I didn't see any competition, but holy crap, the buses, the yeah throngs of people. There were tours from Brazil. There were all of these teen tours from Brazil rolling around. Why? Because it's summertime down there.
00:31:21
Speaker
No school. Indeed, school. Summer in the southern hemisphere. So, southern hemisphere, for some ungodly reason, travels to the northern hemisphere where it is, in fact, winter. and Exactly. And they were rolling around everywhere. These ok big groups of kids.
00:31:39
Speaker
Okay. So damn I'm going to go back to JetBlue. Yes. I'm to start at the very beginning. Oh, boy. So every time I do this quick turnaround thing, which has been a handful of times, yeah I've never gone down and spent like a solid week. like ah we' I've never done it that way. I've always done this like super fast, let's go down, business, business, business, turnaround, come home. Maximize, you know, yeah travel days, all of it.
00:32:05
Speaker
And I've gotten very good at planning it that way. So I bank on the idea that JetBlue is going to have my 6 a.m. flight. Yep. Right?
00:32:16
Speaker
Get down there at 9. Yep. Get off the plane. Go to the resort. Okay. drop my shit off yeah into the luggage hold if the room's not available, which generally it's not. Yep. And I go to a park. Yeah. Harder time. Normally the first park I go to is Hollywood Studios the first day. Oh, yeah. Okay. Because the hotels that i I generally stay in are down in that area. It's like a very separate.
00:32:36
Speaker
Yep. And so we I go to book. No 6 a.m. flight. Early is flight 730 in the morning, which initially totally pissed me off. But I was like, okay, what am I going to do There's nothing I can do. Right, right.
00:32:51
Speaker
Retrospect, I probably could have done gone down the night before and spent the extra night in the hotel and then had a full day. yeah yeah, yeah. But it was like Saturday and it was Martin Luther King weekend. And so the flights were more expensive. I was like, no, no, no. We're looking to skate by. This is supposed to be like a last minute, super fast turnaround thing. Like I wasn't looking to spend a gajillion dollars on the stroke.
00:33:11
Speaker
If I want to do it that way, I'm going to do it like and do it planned. That was not this. Right. So I book the 730. All of that to say we get to the airport, we get on the plane. No, we don't get on the plane. We get to the gate.
00:33:26
Speaker
And i i don't book. I mean, I don't um check luggage. Right. Yeah. You carry on. I'm only there three nights. I do carry on. Yeah. Yeah. And I do it very intentionally. Yeah. And I pay extra for seats at the front of the plane. Right. That I can grab my shit and exactly go. Exactly. Right. So we got there. I don't know why, but I pay extra for both seats. Yeah.
00:33:50
Speaker
And some reason I'm still in boarding group D. Fuck. What am i doing in boarding group D? What? After you've paid for the even more legroom seats? Yeah, in the front the plane. With the not all the way in the front, but like the upgraded seats. I understand, but still.
00:34:07
Speaker
So i go to the i go to the desk. Yeah. I'm like, what gives? Yeah. you because They're making these announcements and they're like, if you try to board the plane in groups D, E and F. Right. With your carry on, we will take it and you will not be able to board the plane. And I'm like, well, fuck you. I'm boarding the plane. Like, on there's no way I'm not boarding this flight. Yeah. Who are you people? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
00:34:29
Speaker
So I go over and I'm talking to her and she says to me, well, it has to do with payload and the, we get the message from the plane and from the administrators as to which boarding groups need to check their carry-on. Okay. And I always think it's crap because the people who board the plane first, who end up in the back of the plane, Yeah.
00:34:50
Speaker
Oftentimes they drop their shit at the front of the plane. Right. In the overhead bins because it's easier for them to walk all the way back and then walk all the way back front when we land. Yeah. Without their luggage. Yeah. Right.
00:35:04
Speaker
The rule should be. Yeah. If you're carrying on the damn plane. Yeah. And you're sitting in row 23. Yeah. You walk your shit to the back of the plane and pop it above your head in row 23. Yeah. I've seen the flight attendant say, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. If you're sitting back there, take that bag with you. can't leave it up front.
00:35:20
Speaker
I know. And it would be surprising. But it's like then then I want to understand how yeah bins above my head row 12 get filled before I get on the plane. Right.
00:35:31
Speaker
Exactly. Why? Why is there no room for my bag and my kid's bag above my seat that I paid for? you D? Why? i don't know didn't ask that question i did i was like how am i a group d in in row 12 yeah well you know this is how it's distributed i was like i was like this is ridiculous ridiculous like everything just gets worse the more i travel it's really does it's like oh but then you know jet blue is really like oh man they went from my favorite 20 years ago 10 years ago to being like
00:36:03
Speaker
Fun, happy people, lots of great snacks, free TV, blah blah, blah, blah, to now, I mean, absolute dog shit. Dog shit. Complete dog shit. And I fly them all the time to make this like trip these trips to Florida because the truth is, is it's the easiest, yeah the most economical. It's how they catch And it's well and it's also a known entity. I know the flight times. It's my only airline now, direct to Vancouver, to see my parents.
00:36:31
Speaker
There used to be Kathy Pacific and some others, and and it's dog shit. Dog shit. It's fucking shit. fucking terrible. And they treat everybody kind of like dog shit. Even in the front of the plane I'll tell you, i will splurge and- and And get that front of the plane seat to Vancouver, which is like a six-hour ride. Yeah, it's a long flight. I don't do it for Florida.
00:36:50
Speaker
yeah Yeah, but it's still dog shit. Yeah, I won't do it for Florida. I would do it for out west if it was like that kind of flight, sure, but not to go down to Orlando. Oh my God, it's so it's they're so bad, honestly. So bad.
00:37:02
Speaker
So she looks at me and she goes, I need you to check your carry-ons. Oh. Of course. Of course. And I'm like, okay, fine. Fine. Gate check and carry on. And just know how fucking pissed off I am. And, you know, I'm like, I'm going, I'm going to write a letter. The least you can do is credit. was Because you pay extra to sit up front. you wouldn't have to check your bags in. That's right.
00:37:21
Speaker
Right. If I pay extra, I should be exempt from that whole like, oh, you got to check a carry on. Like, fuck off. Row 12 is at the front, by the way. It's not that far back. i don't care what you say. It is the front of the plane. It's the front of the plane. I know.
00:37:37
Speaker
It's ridiculous. So, you know, and it cost me, i think it was like 45 bucks per seat extra. Oh, yeah. Those assholes at JetBlue. Every time I pay for the seat, I'm like, what? How much?
00:37:50
Speaker
right Why don't you just price that in and sell me the original ticket I don't have to deal with the extra, extra, extra? Right. Well, and then it's funny that just to like digress for one second, yeah I went to go book flights to Minneapolis and I was like looking at Priceline and to choose seats on Delta.
00:38:06
Speaker
They were doing a surcharge of like 12 bucks per seat to choose seats. I was like, but the ticket that I chose is to choose the seats. Why are you fucking upcharging me 12 bucks? No, it's got to be new thing. Is that a new thing?
00:38:17
Speaker
I don't know, but I was like, fuck you. I'm going to Delta. i'm just like At that point, when all was said and done, it was all the same anyway. It wasn't saving anything. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Right.
00:38:28
Speaker
you know, for all they're like, oh, discount, blah, blah, blah. It's bullshit too. Okay, so let's go back. We're going back to JetBlue. Okay. so I'm all pissed off. Yeah.
00:38:38
Speaker
letting it go because it's nothing I can do at this point to change it. It is what it is. Right. And I'm like, okay, well, hopefully – If my luggage is the last luggage on because it's gate checked, it's going to be the first.
00:38:50
Speaker
Right. Luggage. Right. and I'll get it first. Logical. Right. You would think. Yes. Fucking assholes. I get to Orlando. Yeah. We go to the fucking baggage claim and we're standing there.
00:39:01
Speaker
Our shit was last off the plane. Right. but It was either last off the plane or first off onto the truck on the bottom. and just left there. And they fucking like scuffed up our luggage to no end. Oh, for sure.
00:39:15
Speaker
Which was ridiculous. But all this to say, ruined my plans for the day because my whole thing about grabbing the luggage and getting the hell out of there. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Even though additionally, right, the flight was an hour and a half after I would hour and half later and you're waiting waiting and so it ruined my day so i get to the hotel the room's ready because now it's late oh plus whatever sort of who cares at that point um yeah and so you know we go to the room drop our stuff off for the most part change it pours for two hours so now we're like in the room waiting
00:39:52
Speaker
Okay. ors It was like a hurricane blew through. i don't know what happened. They said like light rain. This was no light rain. This was like torrential downpour. Okay. And so when all was said and done, we hopped on one of the Disney buses to go to Disney Springs. Okay.
00:40:07
Speaker
Because we lost the day. So I was like, why don't we go to Disney Springs? We'll go walk around. We'll go have dinner. You know, not at the hotel. We'll go. And then, you know, we'll get up early tomorrow and go, you know, start our adventure. What's at Disney Springs?
00:40:19
Speaker
It's a shopping. It's mall. So movie theater, bowling alley, stores, restaurants, bakeries, um you know, all all types of stuff. High end to low end. It's still outdoors. It's still outdoors. yeah Which is why at that point it was that it was fine because the rain had stopped anyway.
00:40:37
Speaker
yeah So it was fine. yeah So we went to Disney Springs, but it was cold. Yeah. Now, I brought my packable Patagonia. Smart. Ruthie brought her North Face. Okay. We did come from New York. It was cold. Sure. You have it. Right. Right.
00:40:51
Speaker
But I realized that I did not have enough layers. Like my Patagonia was not warm enough. No way. It was not warm enough. Even with a cashmere sweater under it, it wasn't warm enough to be walking around outside. And so when we went, I ended up buying myself additional layers, additional fleece. Cool. Yeah.
00:41:11
Speaker
yeah You know, like under long sleeve under layers and yep shelves were empty. Yeah. More money in Bob Iger's pocket. Dude, yeah people were buying winter gear at Disney Springs like it was going out of style.
00:41:27
Speaker
You know, Disney, well, was to say that more style, but Disney, as we discussed earlier, hey nobody beats Disney at taking money out of your pocket.
00:41:39
Speaker
Starbucks does, kind of. I don't know. Starbucks banks your money. No, I know, but Disney's pretty good at extracting every last penny you've got. Yeah, but you know what? People do it willingly because it makes them feel good.
00:41:54
Speaker
Okay. It does. It makes you feel good. It's like, you know, it's like going and buying the best tickets you can at a Rangers game. Like, you know, you're going to have a great time. It's going to feel good. You're going to end up going and going to the club and having all the food. Right. And it's yeah it's delicious and it's a fun experience. I don't think it's any different. I just think that um I think that it lasts for more time. So you spend more money like you just. you waite So you didn't buy anything.
00:42:21
Speaker
I don't know. I didn't buy. No, I bought a fleece. I bought a fleece. Okay. And I bought, so but it was at Uniqlo. Like I kept the cost. I was like, ah you know, I could have gone to Lulu and bought a jacket. Yeah. i See?
00:42:33
Speaker
Um, but yeah, no, I bought a, ah like one of their like, uh, polyester eyelash fleece. Yeah. And I bought, um, one of their heat tech undershirts. I bought one for my daughter because nice she packs like a moron cause she's 15. hear you. Right. She doesn't even wear a hat. Seven degrees this morning didn't wear a hat. She was my hair. I wear my hood. The vanity always takes precedent.
00:42:57
Speaker
It's great. Yeah, she doesn't own snow boots either. Yeah. She won't wear them. She's like, I'll wear my Uggs. I'm like, mm-mm-mm. I mean, you were going to learn the hard way when you start losing toes to hypothermia.
00:43:09
Speaker
But okay. When the gangrene sets in, you'll ask me what the green is on your toe and then we'll have a conversation about the no-boos. Keeping your feet dry and warm. um but yeah, I mean, we ended up having a great time. We didn't get to do everything we wanted to because because my time was seriously truncated. And the truth is, is it was ah more exhausting because i didn't it didn't book an extra like an extra day. Normally I would book an extra day. okay Like I wouldn't do a park on both travel days or I wouldn't do a park on the travel day exiting, but then I had to because my first day there less than So you had like two and a half days of park time.
00:43:54
Speaker
it sounds sounds like tweet it is so It was Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, three parks. But those were like on a three-park ticket. So it was Epcot, Animal Kingdom, and Hollywood Studios. okay And Monday night, i the which was the whole impetus for the trip, yep right was they do these after-hour parties um at Magic Kingdom, Epcot, and at Hollywood Studios.
00:44:18
Speaker
Animal Kingdom, they don't do anything extra. They also do don't do fireworks because of the animals. like Yes. Right. um Which are amazing, by the way. Like, weirdly enough, they're really pretty awesome. Yeah. um But on Monday night, it was Magic Kingdom After Hours.
00:44:34
Speaker
Oh. So what happens there is you buy a special ticket. Yeah. for the Like a special event ticket. Yeah. And the event technically runs from 10 p.m. when the park closes to 1 a.m. in the morning.
00:44:45
Speaker
Okay. But they let you in at 7 p.m. Oh. So you get to go to Magic Kingdom starting 7 p.m. to 1 p.m. Nice. 1 a.m., sorry. Yeah. And so that's what we did. So we did four parks. Oh, nice. Between Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Okay.
00:45:01
Speaker
Okay. Yeah, so we did Animal Kingdom on Monday, which is fine because it closes at like 7. So we left a little early and went to Magic Kingdom. It was no big deal. And then on Tuesday, we did Epcot, but we didn't get out as early as we wanted to because we were out until 2.30 in the morning at Magic Kingdom. nu Nice.
00:45:20
Speaker
um So that we were a little late for that. And then on Wednesday, we did Hollywood Studios and got there in the morning for Rope Drop, but had to leave at 3.30 to catch our flight. So I didn't get the full days. Got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. And so...
00:45:35
Speaker
No kid was eaten by an alligator at Animal Kingdom on your trip. Not this time. Actually, that happened at a resort. shouldn't laugh. That's really sad. It is sad, but that happened actually at ah at a resort. It didn't happen at the parks. It didn't? No, that happened at one of the hotels. I feel like it happened at- The hotel that faces Animal Kingdom. They have one there, right? On the monorail? They have- Oh, so the monorail doesn't go to Animal Kingdom. monorail goes to Magic Kingdom and Epcot.
00:46:01
Speaker
What? Yeah, it doesn't down. That's not true. Yeah, it is true. So Magic Kingdom- The monorail with all the different hotels. Okay, look. It's up morning. So the property's huge. the the The acreage overall for Disney's huge. Yeah, yeah. And so in the upper quadrant- In the northern quadrant is Magic Kingdom and Epcot.
00:46:21
Speaker
Okay. Hollywood and Animal Kingdom are down in the southern quadrant of the area. The monorail literally only goes to Epcot and Magic Kingdom and to the hotels in that area yeah in the north. Right. Down in the south, there's no there's nothing other than buses that goes to Animal Kingdom. And then there's the Skyliner that goes to both Epcot and to Hollywood Studios. Right.
00:46:44
Speaker
So the monorail and the Skyliner are the two special... um Wow, it's interesting. Okay. I totally trust you. I'm just thinking about my own lazy behavior. When the kids were four, we did visit the Animal Kingdom. We stayed at the Contemporary Hotel. Yes, which is right next door On the monorail. The Contemporary is right next door to Magic Kingdom.
00:47:02
Speaker
Right. And I'm thinking, would I really have taken a bus? You may have taken car. To Animal Kingdom? Yeah. to animal kingdom Because they've always had these cars also that you can take separately. They're like cabs, but they're called like minivans. Definitely wouldn't have done that. There's four of us. Then it would have been a bus. Plus my parents. I guess it's the bus. It would have been bus. guess it's the bus. Yeah. Yeah, because the monorail doesn't go all the way down to animals. Okay.
00:47:27
Speaker
Okay. Okay, cool. So no mishaps. No. Any like real highlights, surprises? Um, because it was so fucking cold Monday night at after hours, nobody was on Tiana, which is okay splash, the old splash mountain. So it's a water ride. Nobody was riding any water rides. it smart That's cold. Yeah. Then we rode it a couple times. We had ponchos, nice but it was great because, you know, like the sign that you can make to like go again, like you spin your finger. Right. Yeah. Like you can't do that anywhere at Disney because everybody's always waiting on a line. I've done it one time on the PeopleMover. Okay. With Sam. Yeah. Like we did this because we were exhausted and kind of napping on it.
00:48:08
Speaker
Right. In like the middle of like June heat in Florida. Yeah. um But on Tiana, there was no line. So even though there's normally an hour wait on that line. So we were like we rolled our hands and they put us right through for a second ride. Oh, sweet. Okay.
00:48:24
Speaker
and things you know And a lot of the things in Magic Kingdom broke down. And so you know you spend a lot of the night waiting for them to come back up. Oh, shit. Because of the weather. Probably because of the weather. you know and And part of it is is I think that they do these safety checks. Yep.
00:48:39
Speaker
And they're kind of random. yeah And so you know you'll have an hour wait on a line and all of a sudden they'll be like, temporarily closed. And you're like, come on, man. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, all that to say...
00:48:50
Speaker
Yeah. I tried to get my daughter to go on Rockin' Coaster, yeah which is the only one that she wouldn't go on, that she still wouldn't go on, because she went on Everest at Animal Kingdom this time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Which last time she was like, hell no, I'm not doing it. So I do all the roller coasters by myself. Like i go single rider. Okay. ah Because that's where my my thrill is at. I'm the roller coaster person. Yeah. um But yeah, so this time she went on Everest and didn't back out, which was amazing.
00:49:19
Speaker
Nice. So she had a really good time with that. But then when I tried to convince her that going on Rockin' Coaster wasn't that different, she was like, no, I know it goes upside down. And I'm like like, once. Like it's got one loop and it's got a corkscrew. But the corkscrew is not really, i don't consider it upside down.
00:49:36
Speaker
And she was like, no, she bailed. Do do the ride that like go straight up and then do the dead drop like straight down? Yes, but they don't have them here. They have them at Universal. Oh, it's Universal, right. Yeah, what was great about it is when I had gone to Universal, we got on it and I thought that it was going to pull us up slowly and then drop us, right? Right. right um And it didn't. So like I'm all casual and I'm like waiting to take like the slow ride up and it shoot out launched me. Oh my God. Instead, and then it was a slow ride back down. And i was like, okay, that was the element of surprise right there.
00:50:09
Speaker
was like, okay. Actually, that's not this's a lie. Tower of Terror at Hollywood Studios is one of those rides that goes up and down. But it doesn't launch you and then bring you back down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It takes you up in an elevator and then it drops you and then takes you back up again and it drops you. But it's in the dark.
00:50:24
Speaker
That's it. It's in the dark. It's that's Twilight Zone themed, which is one of my favorites because it's Twilight Zone. So you got Rod Serling speaking to you through the whole preamble of the ride, which is kind of amazing to me because I watched Twilight Zone with my dad growing up. what's worse? What's worse? Being launched up by surprise or falling by surprise? Well, you're not falling by surprise. You know you have to come down.
00:50:52
Speaker
No, no, but there's no, like on those rides. So the ride you were on, you said they launched you, surprise. Yeah, was surprised. Outward. Yeah, I thought it was the opposite. It slowed down. Yeah. But I've seen those rides, right, on TV where it's like you go up slowly like a roller coaster and then you're pausing. didn't really know. And all of sudden, boom, like you're gone.
00:51:11
Speaker
Yeah. I think though when you do it that way, yeah like when it's slow up, you know you're coming down. Right. And you're coming down fast. Right, right, right, right. When we got on i don't even remember the name of the ride. It was not the Joker because the Joker's at Six Flags. It was somebody who wears green. A superhero who wears green? don't know.
00:51:30
Speaker
I don't know. The Hulk. The No, the Hulk ride at Universal bananas. The roller coaster is bananas. Yeah. It launches you. it launches you at a 45 degree angle into the air and then you immediately end up in this loop and it launches you out of a tube. It's crazy. Yeah. Yeah, I did that one by myself. That was a single rider for me. Yeah.
00:51:50
Speaker
You know, and it's always so hit or miss too. You're either sitting next to someone who's super social and amazing or you're sitting next to somebody who's so like into their own thing that they won't even look at you. Yeah, yeah. You're not you're not here with me and so we're not going to go through this together. sure you're going to be on your own because you were a single rider and I'm going to be on my own because I was a single rider. Did you pose for a picture on Slashbound? always that one on the last one. Always. like i Always. I'll send you. Yeah, like an Everest we rode twice. The first time was like genuine and the second time we pretended to be sleeping. Yeah.
00:52:19
Speaker
I have a thousand pictures of myself on these rides, like feigning sleep or, you know. i mean, you have to choose one of those to be our our ah episode picture. Okay, sure.
00:52:32
Speaker
Yeah, that'd be good. Yeah, sure. I'll give it to you. That's going to be our Instagram post for our episode 36. Yeah, I'll give it to Okay, so great trip. Good trip. Yeah, it was fun. Good mother-daughter bonding. I love it. Yeah, it was too fast. I like to away a little bit longer. yeah, yeah. You know, she had a volleyball tournament, so we needed to be back for practice on Thursday.
00:52:53
Speaker
Do you want to talk about that? Yeah, sure. um We can talk about that. Do we want to continue with it here or do you want to do it on the next episode? I mean, that's up to you. We got like 15, 10 minutes, 15 minutes left. Can you squeeze it all in? I can squeeze it in.
Sports Events Amidst Weather Challenges
00:53:07
Speaker
Let's do it. yeah um So this particular tournament was in Hartford.
00:53:13
Speaker
Yep. Which, you know. Over the weekend. Over the weekend. Friday to Sunday. yep ah When I discovered that the storm was rolling in Sunday morning early, like between 3 and 7 a.m., and the amount of snow that we were supposed to have, yeah I told the coach we were bailing on Sunday. I can't believe they didn't cancel it. They did not cancel it.
00:53:36
Speaker
Everything's canceled that weekend. It's ridiculous. So the whole thing about canceling an event this big. I know, of course. The logistics behind it are insane. And part of the problem is, this is my belief. I don't know this is a fact, but this is what I believe.
00:53:50
Speaker
I believe that if the organization who plans the tournament Yeah. cancels it yeah they're on the hook to refund everybody right if they don't cancel it and people are like nope not safe not going then they don't owe anybody anything and so logistically it doesn't even matter to them they're like oh yeah ok so i'll just redo the brackets you know will change the trajectory in the times you know the a and p m wave or whatever and then that'll be that And so for Sunday, they decided that they were going to condense it. So they made it like a single elimination. Instead of starting at 7, they were starting at 6 a.m. You know, everybody's going to get out of there by 2 p.m. And I was like, 2 p.m. is too late. Too late.
00:54:32
Speaker
Too late. And I said to them, I said, I don't want to be stuck in this hotel. Right in the middle of the storm. Way too late. Shitty, shitty hotel. Like absolutely fucking terrible. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not going to name it, although i feel like I should just to warn people not to go there.
00:54:47
Speaker
In the Hartford area. Yeah, East Windsor. I know. East Windsor, Connecticut. Which is like 15 minutes away from Hartford. Which way, west or east? and North or south? I think southwest.
00:55:01
Speaker
Southwest. Northwest. It was Northwest because ok people had to go back to the hotel after the team decided we were leaving. Okay. And I had already packed my car because I had already decided I was leaving. There was right there was no question for me. um okay And so they were like, oh, well, we have to go, let's go find a place to eat.
00:55:21
Speaker
yeah We have to go back up north 15 minutes and da-da-da-da-da. And i was like, well, that's not my problem. We're not doing that. Right. I love, you know, I really like the parents. They're awesome group of people so far. but like Safety first, man. Right. But it's like, I'm not tracking back 15 minutes to go eat because people need to go back to the hotel. Exactly. I'd sooner just go hit a Panera on the way home and call it. Yep.
00:55:39
Speaker
Right? Like, I'm good. Exactly. Which also isn't as good as it used to be, by the way. But yeah I digress. I digress. Agreed. Agreed. um So we go up on Friday. yeah It takes me so long to get there.
00:55:56
Speaker
shit. I don't really understand what happened. I meant to leave around noon because, you know we were going to stop or whatever. And I, ah we didn't leave. It was too late.
00:56:08
Speaker
By the time we left. And so, you know, we get up there and she wants to stop at Saber's, which is thrifting, which is fine. Like she loves that shit. Sometimes, you know, sometimes I'm amenable to it and other times like I'm so creeped out and disgusted by it. So it's kind of a you know toss up. It's a little bit of a crapshoot as to which version of me you're going to get when you say let's go thrifting. Nice.
00:56:32
Speaker
um So, you know, we went up and we went to a Sabres, Northern Connecticut.
Dining Experiences: From Steakhouses to Korean Cuisine
00:56:40
Speaker
And after that, she said to me, you know, I've never been to a Longhorn Steakhouse. Oh. There's one here.
00:56:47
Speaker
Can we go? love Longhorn. yeah And I was like, yeah, sure. That's fine. i You know, you'll have a steak. I'll have a salmon with salad, which is, you know, my usual in these places. sure And so we go over and of course it's busy because it's eight o'clock on a Friday night. Seven o'clock on a Friday night. yeah Terrible. yeah yeah And so I send her to find out how long the wait is. Yeah.
00:57:10
Speaker
It's on the app. Well, I don't have the app. i just It was across the street. So I just kind of drove over and like went in. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so she goes in and she calls me and she said and I said to her before she left, I said, ask how long the wait is for a table. If it's long, scope out the bar.
00:57:26
Speaker
Yep. And see if you can get two seats at the bar. She can't sit there. Minor. Let me tell you something. Yeah. Sorry. Did I preempt the story? Yes. Sorry. Florida. Because it happened to me before. I did it in Florida at Disney Springs. We sat at the bar. Yeah. She sat with me. Yeah.
00:57:44
Speaker
I have done it a million times in New York. I've done it at Pasta Louise. Really? Park Slope. They don't care if you're they're with an adult who is not going to let them drink. Most times they don't give a shit.
00:57:56
Speaker
Some reason, maybe it's a different you know situation in Connecticut. Maybe they enforce it more. yeah But in Connecticut, she went and found two seats and then the woman asked her for ID and she was like, oh, my mom's coming. We're just having dinner. And she was like, no, you got to be 21 to sit at the bar.
00:58:09
Speaker
Yeah. Which is insane. I'm trying to think where that happened to me and Evan. Yeah, I've done it a million times. Same deal. And not had a problem. We've definitely been booted out in New York, so I'm surprised that you did not. I've not been.
00:58:23
Speaker
In New York City or upstate? New York City. Yeah, no. it' no I've never had that here. Hillstone. No, you can't sit there. Sorry. At Hillstone? Yep. Really? No dice.
00:58:33
Speaker
Crazy. And then, to think where else that's happened to us. It might have been Longhorn, actually. i think on a busy night. Hey, two seats there. Nope.
00:58:44
Speaker
He can't sit there. He's too young. I'm like, I'm his dad. It doesn't matter. I'm like, oh. Crazy. So I went back in. yeah She didn't get me. I parked the car. I go in. I walk across the parking lot and the freezing cold. it go and I go in. She's like, nope. I'm like, fine. Fuck it. Let's go. yep And so we walk out and I tell her to you know go on the map and find a restaurant that's local. And I start driving. you know Because i i still have I'm still an hour away from the hotel. Right. Exactly. So I'm just going to start driving. And you're going to you know what you're going to learn how to be the best co-pilot version of yourself as you can. That's right. And you're going to find a place for us to go eat. Yeah. And so I pull out of the parking lot to the right.
00:59:20
Speaker
And I get to this light. And across the street on the left side, i see this bright Korean restaurant. hey And it's called like Dawah, D-A-W-A. And I look at her and i go, look that place up.
00:59:35
Speaker
yeah Because we both love Korean food. So it's not an issue. And she looks it up. She said, they get great ratings. I said, good, let's go. yeahle The place is filled with Asian people. So you know it's good. yeah right It's like right authentic. right And so we go in, we sit down and had a fantastic, fantastic Korean dinner.
00:59:55
Speaker
nice Yeah. Barbecue? Choice. You could do barbecue. Each table had a barbecue, a grill in it. Okay. We didn't do that. She did. Yeah, yeah, We both did like a shrimp rice dish. Yeah. bonchan came. Nice. And we did, i did a kimchi pancake.
01:00:10
Speaker
Okay. And we did the other, the fish cakes, which I can't remember the Korean name right now. Yeah. Spicy fish cakes. Okay. Oh, yeah. And it was amazing. Fantastic. And it was too much food. And so, you know, were like, okay, we'll take it back and we'll, you know, hold on to it. And i was like, if we leave it in the car, it'll be refrigerated. Right. Yeah. present even yes Exactly. Which it was.
01:00:30
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Which was fine because I knew that I was leaving the next day anyway. Yeah. That's fine. Yeah.
Accommodation Woes and Regional Discussions
01:00:35
Speaker
Yeah. um So, so yeah. So we go to the hotel. She goes with her team because in this organization she stays with the girls. She doesn't stay with me. So I'm by myself. That's good. Yeah.
01:00:44
Speaker
Nice. What a shit fucking whole hotel. Oh my God. Just like one of those times, like, here's what I find. I find when I go to a hotel yeah and I haven't registered the fact that I'm disgusted by it. Yeah.
01:01:00
Speaker
Subconsciously, I realize I'm disgusted by it and I don't touch anything and I don't sit down. yeah I literally just stand. like like I'm just like walking through the room and standing up and walking. There was a hole in my wall.
01:01:13
Speaker
And the following morning when I got up to go take a shower, yeah even though I had plenty of hot water in the sink, yeah the regulator for the shower only turned 25%. And so I never got hot water.
01:01:25
Speaker
You know, because we we go to that area so often for hockey. Yeah. And so, yes, East, no, I would say West Hartford, definitely, or the whole Hartford area in
01:01:43
Speaker
is so it's It's weird. like You go to different places. You can fly to Detroit, Minneapolis, Chicago, whatever, go to Boston, There are pockets of places where there's always a new hotel. yeah right these These are two-star hotels, right? yeah There's always a new one.
01:02:00
Speaker
so you can you know a new Holiday Express, a new Homewood Suites, a new whatever, residence inn. You can get right a decent place. It might not be worth the money, but it's new, so fine. Right, you know it's clean.
01:02:13
Speaker
But there's something going on in that gap between West Hartford
01:02:21
Speaker
Within West Hartford to even like Stanford, that whole area, there's not a single new – I mean, I've tried. Yeah. Well, you're up there one way more frequently than me. I'm there all the time. Yeah. And I'm like – I just struggle. There is new-ish – new-ish two-star hotel in that area that's – so I'm not surprised yeah by your story. Yeah. Well, this – I don't care. I'll name it. it was They put us up and comfort in Comfort Inn.
01:02:47
Speaker
Oh, my God. Yeah. As soon as say that, I already know it's trouble. Yeah. which That's star. That's not even two stars. The other organization last year did the same thing, put us up in a Comfort Inn. And they were both in east East Windsor. And I think that they were two separate comfort inns in East Windsor because when I pulled into the parking lot of this hotel, it was not familiar. It was not the same place as the last year.
01:03:08
Speaker
Like when I went into the hotel, it wasn't the same. Somebody swapped. But like – I thought it was the place. Oh, my God. Comfort Inn. Oh, dude. That's even below Residence Inn. Awful. Holy shit. Awful. Oh, my That is literally the Roach Motel brand. it's so bad.
01:03:22
Speaker
It was so gross. So gross. That's like one of those, even for New York, that's it's a $70 a night kind of bullshit hotel room. Yeah, but it was like $100 a night, and they didn't refund us the second night, even though it was storm-related. You're not getting that back. yeah No way. Even though it was storm-related. Storm of the Century rolls in. Yeah.
01:03:40
Speaker
Okay, so you actually, okay, so I was i misunderstood from earlier. I thought you just didn't go at all, but you actually went. I went for 24 hours. And then early. Yeah, yeah. Literally went for 24 hours. We drove up on Friday, got to the hotel just after 10 p.m. on Friday night. yeah And we hit the road to come home on Saturday. I want to say it was probably 7 o'clock because we went and had dinner with some of the families before we left.
01:04:05
Speaker
I'm going to look through the map. East Windsor. And I would argue that her team is very cool. The girls are cool. The parents are cool. And they won most of their matches.
01:04:18
Speaker
They won two out of three. The third one they split and then lost the third match. They just kind of fell apart. Okay. So
01:04:28
Speaker
East Windsor. Yeah. I'd asked you earlier where this was. Mm-hmm. And at first you said Southwest. Right, which i do it's not. It's North. the map, it's bottom left. If you look at the map, it's bottom left. Yeah.
01:04:43
Speaker
Then you said- i think it's North. Then you said, no, no, Northwest. It's okay. I said, Northwest. But Northwest, there's one nice hotel, beautiful hotel, okay called the- Hang on.
01:04:59
Speaker
i That's the one that I always go all the time in West Hartford, which I love. And it's called, want to say that Delano, but not it.
01:05:12
Speaker
shoot going to have find it. It's ah an amazing hotel. They have weddings every weekend. Just a crazy great place. But anyway, so I was looking at it and I was like, wait it's called the Delamar.
01:05:24
Speaker
Delamar. West Hartford. West Hartford. There's a pocket of West Hartford, which is like, what? Rich. Yeah, West. Yeah, yeah. There's a mall over there that's nice too. East Windsor. East Windsor. It's gross. It's in the name, by the way.
01:05:40
Speaker
East Oh, yeah. East. Sure. But, you know, it could be the east side of a town. it could be the east side of Windsor, which could be on the west side of Hartford. Okay.
01:05:52
Speaker
So on the map, it's east Windsor. It is northeast of Hartford. I knew it was north. because that because and I was like, oh, that's the one part of Hartford I have not been to. It's right next to Bradley International Airport. Yeah.
01:06:09
Speaker
Yes. Right. Yep. Which I have to go back there in May well June, I think, for championships, which is where i how I ended up there last year in the spring.
01:06:23
Speaker
Yeah. In East, in we stayed in East Windsor because the convention, the Hartford Convention Center is where the tournament is. Yeah. Oh, I see. Yeah, they're all in convention centers. they have Actually, there's a huge AAU tournament coming oh to Jacob Javits' center. I think February 6th, 7th, and 8th.
01:06:42
Speaker
Right. Okay. Which Ruthie's team is not playing in, which pissed me off. You're kind of stuck there.
01:06:53
Speaker
in the team hotel, right? You can't really go your own way. Actually, I'm not sure because the truth is is if you're not the chaperone yeah for that particular tournament, I don't know that you have to stay there because your kids aren't staying with you. They're staying with each other.
01:07:08
Speaker
And they're under the auspice of the chaperone and the coaches. So I don't really know. Okay. Okay. So you could...
01:07:20
Speaker
Ditch. Effectively. Your daughter. Yeah. And stay at a nicer hotel. Yeah. okay And visit her at the shit hotel. Well, no, I wouldn't even visit her at the shitty hotel. I just wouldn't see her other than at the convention center.
01:07:32
Speaker
I mean, I'd have to drive her. But you get to see her anyways in the hotel when there's game events? No, right? No, I'd have to drive her to and from. Okay. If I'm there or, you know, I can send her with somebody else.
01:07:44
Speaker
Okay. ah But yeah, no, I don't really see her. Because they're like they're in their own yeah they're in their own space. So there's your answer. You get to be Upper East Side, Mom. So I know that my son has to stay with the team and fly with them from New York yeah to the tournament. Yeah.
01:08:06
Speaker
But we've never flown commercial before. So is it okay if my son goes commercial and I fly private? There you go. Right. That would be awesome. If only I was that person.
01:08:19
Speaker
If only. Albeit on a lower level, but still. Yeah. Oh, my God. Private. I'm never going to front. Private. All right. Well, the time has come. Has it?
Humor Segment: Dad Jokes and Light-hearted Banter
01:08:30
Speaker
Jessica, the time has come. To say adieu, adieu, adieu. you and you and you. get my voice rest and try to get it back. Yeah, seriously. Then I'm gonna give you some really terrible, on the music theme still, some really terrible dad jokes. Oh, okay.
01:08:47
Speaker
The first one. The first one. Okay. Okay. get my music ready okay here it is Why didn't the vampire attack Taylor Swift?
01:09:03
Speaker
Why is it so loud? Why is it so loud? Jesus, deafening. the shit That's better. Why didn't the vampire attack Taylor Swift?
01:09:14
Speaker
um Why didn't the vampire attack? I'll give you a hint. Oh. Yes. Is it because she had bad blood?
01:09:27
Speaker
Oh my God. i Did get it? Oh my God. Did I get it? oh why did it Oh my God. got it. No, that's wrong one. Yay. Holy shit.
01:09:40
Speaker
I was just about to say hint is it's in one of her songs. Yeah. The titles. Dad blood. Oh my God. okay I feel so much better. Yay.
01:09:53
Speaker
Okay. So we go two for two. I don't know. Let's try. We'll see what we got. How do you follow Will Smith in the snow? What? you'll You'll get this one.
01:10:04
Speaker
um I think you'll get one. If you get the last one in the same vein, you'll get this one. How do you follow Will Smith in the snow? i I couldn't have that voice.
01:10:17
Speaker
In another world. In another world, in another the universe, Jessica Silver gets the answer to the question, how do you follow Will Smith in the snow? So at first, my brain went to Men in Black.
01:10:34
Speaker
Okay. then Then I realized that you would follow the Fresh Prince. Oh my God. oh my God. Oh my God. And you know Holy shit.
01:10:47
Speaker
You know why? Oh my God. Two for two. Because i I just realized like while I was thinking about him, how obsessed I am right now with putting my feet in someone else's snow prints.
01:11:00
Speaker
Ladies and gentlemen, to our single listener out in Vancouver, holy shit. Yeah. Oh yeah. She's two for two. It's my day. Shall we go three for three? Oh, God. We really pushed it right now. It was a game. and we just leave you on high? You can just like, nope, I'm cashing out. Wait, was it pyramid? What was it?
01:11:20
Speaker
ah Yeah, it was. No, I'm kidding. Shall you bet it all? are you cashing out? I'm cashing out. I don't think I'm going to end up having three for three, but we can try Which one did I circle? Three for three.
01:11:33
Speaker
Three for three. Okay. Oh, wow. You're going to get this one. Oh my God. why Now you're going to say that about everything. I'm going to get it. for three totally writes now these are These are easier because they're like culturally relevant.
01:11:45
Speaker
I don't have the sound effect. Four, three, four, three. Come on. What do you call someone who raises hens? Someone who raises hens? Hens. Like the little birds. Hens.
01:12:00
Speaker
What do you call the person? You're on roll today. you You took the smart pill this morning. Is this a joke or is this like serious? It's
01:12:15
Speaker
a joke. I mean, it's a dad joke. It's going to be corny. It's going to be corny. What do you call someone who raises hens? What do you call someone who raises hens?
01:12:27
Speaker
Oh, a hen raiser? A chicken tender. Oh, that one's good. See? Oh, that was good. You, oh my God. i was going to go with like a hill raiser, a hen raiser. You were going three for three. Holy shit. knew wasn't going to go three for three. Two out of, that's ridiculous, Jessica. That is unprecedented on this podcast. I told you, it was like cultural. Like the cultural ones are better at than the ones like, what do you call someone who raises hands a chicken tender?
01:12:59
Speaker
Thank you. I appreciate that. That's a great way to end episode 36. Give me round of applause. Holy shit. It's like a dad joke. We're on roll here, man. Holy cow. I the rest of my day is like that. Yeah, it's got to be now. It's luck driven. Fantastic.
01:13:16
Speaker
All right, everybody. Thank you for listening. Episode 36 comes to an end. See later. Bye. Bye.
Episode Conclusion and Listener Engagement
01:13:21
Speaker
see you later by by Well, well, well, you made it to the end.
01:13:26
Speaker
We can't thank you enough for listening to all of our random thoughts. Don't forget to give us a five-star rating. And you know how to reach us on the gram at TGS pod or send email to hello at the grocery stick.com.