Transcript
Speaker: Hello, everyone. Welcome back to the It's Happening For Me podcast. I am so excited for today, you guys. We have one of my favorite human beings as a guest. Okay, this is an icon. She is literally the queen of confidence. She is a DJ, a mentor,
Speaker: Literally, i don't know what she doesn't do, but here we have Miss Maddie Maple. Hello. I am so happy to be here. You have no idea. I'm not just saying that. like I am so, so excited for this, and thank you for having me.
Speaker: Yes, I'm so excited. I am also not just saying this when I say that you are someone who has completely changed my life, like in ah so many different ways, like in first starting off in business as a mentor, and then really getting to know you and like having you be an actual friend and just like someone that I feel just so happy to have in my life. And I'm just yeah so happy that you're here.
Speaker: Yeah, I feel the exact same way about you. And like, that's what I'm so grateful for with my clients. Like you're not just like my client, like we are friends. And I'm like, so grateful to be able to evolve alongside of you and grow together. And yeah, it's like a really special relationship that I hold very dear to my heart.
Speaker: Yay. Okay, so i you really are the queen of confidence. And am want you to kind of take us back to, was there ever a time when you didn't feel confident?
Speaker: Great question. Very great question. And yes and most of my life and still like the thing is like confidence does not come natural to me at all. And that's something that, you know, when I started studying confidence that I actually learned that some people are born with different personality traits that do make them a little more, you know, naturally confident. And so that doesn't mean that if you are lacking confidence that you can't build it. It's also a skill. It's something that you get to cultivate for yourself. And, you know, that's where things started to shift for me to realize that, like, I can actually build confidence for myself. But I mean, my whole life, like as young as I can remember, I remember and we connected about this, right, of like the like the Truman Show.
Speaker: kind of effect where like, I remember being a child and being like, people are just pretending to like me. There is something wrong with me. And my parents told the other kids to be nice to me Like, I always felt like there was something wrong with me. Not just like I was an outsider, like I was different. It was like, I felt like there was something inherently wrong with me from such a young age. And i do think, you know, wherever it came from, just like even generational,
Speaker: Shit, like it, it it felt, you know, and as I've learned along my journey, I feel like a lot of it isn't just mine. It's, it's shit that we carry. And like, as woman, you know, is something that I just feel like was inherently inside of me, just this insecurity you Yeah, you know, and then, you know, i grew up in the Mormon church. So if you don't know my story, i grew up in Utah. I grew up in Kaysville, which is like the hub for Mormonism. And, you know, me sharing about that isn't necessarily to bash on.
Speaker: i don't I don't want to like bash on the religion. And also the truth of it is that I grew up in a community where I was pretty much taught that I could not be myself And that there was something wrong with being me. And like, you know, even going into my teenage years, I would bring changes of clothes with me, depending on where I was going, if I needed to be more modest or like, like, I always knew I wanted to express myself.
Speaker: But then like, I couldn't express myself in different places. I always wanted a nose ring. And so I got like a septum nose ring that I could flip up. and flip down depending on who I was hanging out with, whose house and were their parents Mormon. You know, the boyfriend I had at the time, like his dad was the bishop of a church. So like kind of like the leader of a specific church. So like I would bring changes of clothes to like be more modest when I went over there.
Speaker: And it's like, what does that do to a young woman who is trying to find herself and find who she is? and to literally feel like I can't be myself or even certain parts of me that felt so authentic. Like I loved drinking coffee. I loved rap music. I loved crop tops. And it wasn't like when I explained this, I'm like, it wasn't even this like rebellious part of me that was like, oh, I just want to do whatever people are telling me not to do.
Speaker: It was truly authentic. Like it was authentic desires. You know, when I listen to rap music, it was like I I loved it, you know? And I remember even making CDs of rap songs where I would go on Google and I would look up, um this was before we had you know Spotify and and things.
Speaker: I took like the album from The Weeknd. the trilogy. And I went through every single song and found the ones where he didn't swear and then made my own CD of songs where he didn't swear. so I could like listen to that at home. And it's like, I was always filtering.
Speaker: I was always filtering. I was always dimming. I was always feeling guilty for who I was guilty for what I like to listen to guilty for how I wanted to dress. And that guilt has, has,
Speaker: really like, I still feel it sometimes, 29 years old, you know, and I still sometimes feel guilt for no reason. And I have to like check myself. But that's how I grew up was always feeling like there was something wrong with me. And so yeah, I lived most of my life, feeling so insecure, feeling so on the outside, struggling to make friends struggling to like,
Speaker: like i I truly felt I had no purpose in this life. and And at some points in my teenage years, it actually became quite like dark and morbid where I was like, I don't understand why I'm alive.
Speaker: And feeling almost that sense of like dread and like I didn't want to be alive because I hated who I was so much. And that's crazy to think about now looking at who I am now and like look at me with my...
Speaker: Pictures, um if you're watching the video, like i have all these blown up pictures of myself behind me. Like I love who I am and what I've created and I have this deep purpose. So it might be hard to even see that that's where I came from, but it really is. Like it was deep and dark at times how much I didn't like who I was.
Speaker: So the answer to that question is yes. Like, it did not come from confidence. It is something that I have had to work my fucking ass off to build. And I still have moments where I struggle with my confidence. And that's totally normal. It's something that I...
Speaker: feel is a lifelong journey to continue to cultivate for yourself, whether you hate yourself or there's even just little ways that you're letting your boundaries slip or letting people walk all over you or just like little ways that you're not being authentic or speaking up for yourself.
Speaker: Everyone on this planet, it doesn't matter how successful you are, you still have ways in which you need to work on what you believe you are worthy of, what you believe about yourself. And um it's it's truly a lifelong journey.
Speaker: Mm-hmm. something so beautiful, Maddie, is that, just a real quick shout out your Gene Keys, like, your vocation is Gene Key 46. And I feel like the gift is really, like, cultivating this, like, deep inner self-love. And, like, that is your core talent that you're here to give to the collective. So it makes sense that, like, the thing that we struggle with the most, like, you know every flavor of that feeling, right? Of, like, everything you just said. And so, duh, you are... Now that you've alchemized it, the perfect person to be a teacher of these things and to help other people, because it's like you understand to the depths of like your clients and just people that you're you're serving, even who aren't even clients. like You just inspire people from listening to your podcast, from watching you. Right. It's like you're such an inspiration. And it's because they know that you've been to the depths of hell. Literally, that's what makes you so equipped.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. It's like, I wouldn't want to teach. i wouldn't want to learn confidence from someone that didn't actually understand it. Right. Someone who just popped out of the womb and was naturally confident. Like, you know, i I wouldn't want to learn from them myself because they don't understand me. And I think that's why my business took off so quickly when I started it. It was truly like there was no strategy. There was no positioning. I wasn't trying to be an authority. i was setting up this mic, literally the one I have right here. I never changed it. Seven years ago, I set up the same mic. And I just started talking about what I was going through and how I was moving through it. And so many people, you know, talking about business specifically, so many people in business are so afraid to share their story and be vulnerable and talk about what they're going through because they feel like, oh, well, people aren't going want to work with me or aren't going want to pay me or aren't going to be inspired by me because I'm talking about what I'm struggling with.
Speaker: Girl, I literally have made hundreds of thousands of dollars, now have generated $1.3 million dollars in my business by literally talking about what I struggle with.
Speaker: Like that is why people work with me. And they tell me that like when they hire me, they're like, the reason I want to work with you over anybody else is because like, I feel like you truly understand me and you don't act all high and mighty. And like, you're on this high horse, like, you know, everything. Like, I feel like you're literally with me, like you're evolving with me. And that's why people want to work with me. And so I feel like I get to be that example and expander for people, especially people listening right now. If you feel like you have to put on this front in order to get people to want to work with you.
Speaker: Like, no, you also don't have to force yourself to be overly vulnerable if that's not natural to to you or you don't want to, right? Like you don't have to air out your dirty laundry in order to connect with people, you know, if that's not natural to you. But for me, it it was always natural. Like I wanted to share those things and because I just allowed myself to, um that that is literally what...
Speaker: why people want to work with me is because of that. Yeah. Yes. No, literally. And something that I think is so fascinating about your story is you talk about how like you didn't know what a coach was. Like you didn't know what is business coaching. Like you literally just started by helping people. And I think your like success is just such such a testament to like how aligned you are. So can you walk us through that? Like what was it actually like when you started a business? Like maybe like what were like some of the offers you created or like how did you help people? Yeah, absolutely. And that's so funny you said that because I was going to bring that up as well as like I was actually reading an old post of mine yesterday where I was talking about that. Like, I'm so grateful that I didn't even know what the coaching industry was.
Speaker: I had no idea an industry existed. i literally just had like gone through this transformation. And well, OK, so how it all started was I started working for an entrepreneur.
Speaker: as a personal assistant. And so, you know, by working with her, I started to just come to the conclusion that I wanted my own business, but I had no idea what it was going to be about. And again, like I want to be an inspiration for people who feel like they don't have a thing or like their purpose. Right. Some people, they grow up knowing exactly what they want to do. You know, they're ten years old and they're like, I want to be a doctor or I know I'm going to be a soccer player or whatever.
Speaker: I had no idea. And even when I decided I wanted a business, I had no idea. I first started creating like a, I wanted to create, create like a rave accessory brand. And it was like these like chokers. And then I realized like, I am not crafty whatsoever. And like, I do not want a product but based business. And i put all this money into it and I started creating it. And I was like,
Speaker: Nevermind, not that. Then I thought I wanted to be a fitness coach, which honestly would have been a good fit, but something still wasn't like right. And I was working for this entrepreneur and I was like listening to podcasts like all day. I was obsessed with self-help.
Speaker: I was obsessed with reading like self-help books, listening to podcasts. And I remember... and Just like sitting there, like I remember the moment that I was listening to a book. It was You Are a Badass at Making Money by Jen Sincero.
Speaker: Yeah, Sincero, I think. um It was a long time ago. And she said something and it literally just like clicked. And I was like, oh my God, it's right in front of my face. I'm so obsessed with podcasts. I'm so obsessed with self-help. I'm so obsessed with all these things.
Speaker: That's the thing. So then i was like, hey, i'm going to start my podcast. And i started Breaking Butterfly. And I wasn't coaching at the time. i was just starting the podcast. And again, like it did not come natural to me. Like you look at you, you see people for where they are now, but it's so important to look at like what the process was actually like for them. When i recorded my first podcast, i recorded it probably 15 times and I would record it and I would download it. And then I would listen to it in the car while I was like driving and doing like DoorDash to try to like make ends meet.
Speaker: And I would just rip myself apart. Like I would listen to myself and I'd be like, why did I say that? And why did I say it like this? And I sound like this and dah, dah, dah, dah. And then I'd record it again and do the same thing.
Speaker: And there was times where I was almost in tears because I was just like, fuck, like this is so uncomfortable. I hate this. I hate how I'm talking. I hate how I'm doing it. And finally, I just got to the point where i was like, okay, I've got to just put it out there. And i did.
Speaker: And i had like so much support. I was so grateful. I just had, you know, I had kind of built a brand at that point where I was like a rave girl. So I did have a lot of like girls already following me. I had a little bit of like my own brand.
Speaker: um And I just started posting kind of like inspirational things here and there and started putting out little quotes, you know, like, what are you grateful for today? And just kind of started stepping into that. Launched my first podcast, started gaining some traction. I was like okay. Then I took on some practice clients, which I truly believe in where, you know, the coaching industry now, it's like most people are trying to are trying to become coaches because they know about the industry and they're getting so much like advice from gurus and people and charge your worth.
Speaker: I just started helping people for free. I took on three practice clients still to this day, like they hold such a a special place in my heart. Coached them for free, started to build my own confidence in my coaching abilities. And I just started just serving people like i have created so many free offers. And again, like I believe in charging your worth.
Speaker: I do. But when you're at the beginning and I'm starting my brand, like I was just like, how can I serve people? i did not gatekeep. I did not hold things back. I did free calls all the time for people. I did free masterclasses more than I can count. Like I've probably done up to like 40 or like 30 or 40 free masterclasses. I made so many like free eBooks. And then i would go on my Instagram and be like, who wants this eBook? I just created this eBook about beating self-doubt. That was my first one. And I'd have all these girls be like, I want it.
Speaker: And I would email it to them individually. And then I would check up on them and I would say, hey, how did you like the e-book? What's coming through for you? And then I would sometimes hop on free calls and like coach them a little bit based off what they got in the free e-book. And then that's how I started like signing clients is I would do these free calls. Like I was just serving so freely. Again, there was no...
Speaker: strategy. There was no funnel. I guess it was a strategy. Actually, at that time, I did start working with my first business coach where it did become kind of a strategy of like, okay, give the free value, check in with them.
Speaker: And then you can like, you know, offer your coaching. So that is a strategy. But I wasn't all like, I don't know. It wasn't about the numbers. It was just like, how many people can I serve?
Speaker: And how can how many people can I just like invite into my coaching? You're right. it I wasn't in the mindset of like, how do I get people to buy from me? It's like, how can I genuinely serve people? And I still live by that now.
Speaker: And that is something that I feel like so many people are missing in their business. because they have all of this advice from people who are already making six figure months and they're trying to jump too fast.
Speaker: And I believe in timeline collapsing and all these things. But like, I'm sorry, there's a part of it where you just need to put in the fucking work. And I built my community and I built my loyal fan base and my audience and my like, if you look at my, you know, you come into a free experience with me, you see the people in there that have been there for years and learning from me.
Speaker: I built that shit brick by brick. And I really believe in the law of compensation, which is a universal law, which means you are going to get back what you put out into the world.
Speaker: And it might not be linear, right? It might not be, oh, you put something out and you get money right away. But I just believed everything that I'm putting out, it is going to come back to me. And it has tenfold. And so that's what the beginning of my business looked like. It was just like, I was just putting shit out and creating shit and every day waking up and asking myself, like, how can I help people? And how can I be honest? And how can I be myself?
Speaker: And, um, Yeah, and then there's other parts of the story where sometimes you lose pieces of that and then you come back into it and you get all messed up in the business world and you do start thinking about numbers and launches and all these things.
Speaker: But at the end of the day, you got to come back. How can I serve people?
Speaker: that's it That's the key. How can I serve people? And people fucking lose that because you're so obsessed with hooks and how to say things and how to say things to the right people and your ideal client avatar. It's like...
Speaker: It just, yeah. Yeah. That's a whole other conversation. Yes. So something that I think so many people experience, and you probably have this, like when you have clients that come to you that have worked with other people in the coaching industry, like me, for example, and just got in like this very like interesting like advice that just like didn't work for me. And then when I found your world, it's like literally like a breath of fresh air because you really do care about people. Like it's like, I think the first thing, I think I came to one of your three master classes. And then I got the um like Instagram audit. And it's like these little pieces of just like getting into your energy and being like, oh my God, like this is like, like I want more. Right. And like, I love what you say too. It's like, if you give stuff away, you don't have to be afraid of gatekeeping because people want your energy. Like there's limitless, like things that they could
Speaker: received from you. And like the more i feel like you're one of the most creative person people I've ever met. and so I feel like you like when you're so in this energy of service and just like, yeah, giving it all away, it's never going to really run dry.
Speaker: Exactly. Like there's so much of an abundance of ideas and energy and creativity. And and the more that you try to like gatekeep and hold things back, the more you're creating that dam where things can't like flow you know it's it's kind of the same with money where it's like if you're holding all your money and you're like i can't spend any money it's very hard to manifest more because you're like in this scarcity you can be in a scarcity of creativity of ideas of of service right and um yeah i feel like in that way i truly live from that place of just like abundance you know um
Speaker: Where, yeah, there's people who have taken like every single... i mean, there's people who do my program multiple times, right? Like I'm going to launch Meta again. And I have a lot of girls who've already... I'm coming.
Speaker: Yay! I'm so excited. Yeah, i have a lot of girls that have done the program before that are coming back to do it again. Because it's not just about like the information. it's about the transformation you get to go through in that space and so many other things. But um yeah, people get very tripped up on...
Speaker: on that, you know, even like, like coaching in the DMS, right? It's like, oh, you shouldn't coach people in the DMS. And, you know, you have to find your own line and your own balance of like, okay, yeah, maybe I'm not sitting here coaching this person for an hour in the DMS when they're not paying me. Yes, we have standards, we have boundaries.
Speaker: We like to get paid. I like to get paid. And also if someone comes into my DMS and it's like, hey, I love this piece of content you created. Like, how did you do that? dude, I'll sit there and do a screen record video and show them how I fucking did it. Like, come oh love you know what I mean? Like, it's just people if I want to, right? Yes.
Speaker: And it's like, i don't know. No, that literally, that just made me think of something else is like, you are truly a girl's girl. Like, yeah, like, um I just think about I want to talk about this later. But like, let's just talk about it now. Let's talk about hot girl shit, which is one of your like, one of my favorite retreats that you offer. i feel so I went twice to Maddie's hot girl shit retreat. Can you first tell us about it? Like, what is that?
Speaker: Yeah, Hawkgirl shit, I mean, it really is like a thing of its own. It is, you know, so I have retreats that I do in Costa Rica that are like spiritual retreats. they're more of like your typical retreat that you would think of. Hawkgirl shit is its own different beast. It is centered around...
Speaker: ah photo shoots, right. And visual and physical branding and marketing. Um, but it also has that retreat vibe, right. Where it is about like the girlhood, the sisterhood. um it's a whole experience where, you know, we create your creative visions and I get to coach you on it And then you get to come and actually bring it to life. And,
Speaker: You know, we have workshops and coaching every day, but then you get like a photo shoot with a professional photographer every day and you get to do B-roll and talking videos and trends. So you get to get all of this content like physically.
Speaker: But then there is that deeper layer to it where it's like, okay, we're creating this creative vision, wanting to bring it to life. what is that actually? And is it actually authentic to you? And how can we bring forward the authentic parts of you and bring it into this? And, um, it's a, it's a lot more of a identity shift and almost that spiritual experience. And people sometimes, uh,
Speaker: expect right like I have a lot of girls come and they're like oh I thought I was just coming for photos but now I have this completely different vision of who I am and what I want to do in this world and seeing myself in a different light right and so yeah it's it's really special I just did my third yeah and you've come to two of them I'm about to do my fourth and it's it's one of the things that I am most proud of creating in this world It's literally Maddie. Like, I feel like this is just so your element, like there, it's just so you like just seeing you like in your element also like just being able to help people understand like how to pose, like something as simple as that, right? yeah Like it's like so many of us,
Speaker: like we have a lot of us that are entrepreneurs like we have these businesses and like there comes ah a point where like we want to elevate ourselves right and elevate our visuals and like have photos that actually represent us and like there are just I'm sorry but a lot of a lot of branding photos are so boring and like yeah you know they're just like they're all the same and it's like if you're a coach you don't need to look like a coach it's like you know let's get some personality in there. And so I feel like you're just like such a channel of creativity and really helping people, like you said, step into that identity like, who do you want to be? Like, you don't have to fit in this box. You can literally bring all of these elements out of you. And I feel like you're just also when I say like a girl's girl, something that is so special is like, Maddie literally will bring like her shoes, her fur coats, like her jewelry, like anything that she's ever like, she has the coolest style, right? So like, she'll bring all of her stuff. And it's like, yeah, like, wear it. What do you want? Like, you just have to be the one that carries it to the photo shoot, you know, it's like, take what you want. And I feel like so many people like they want to, um,
Speaker: Almost like not like hoard their success, but it's this feeling of like, oh, this is my thing. Like, I don't want you to have this because this is me. And you're just the complete opposite. It's like, oh, we can all win. Like you can wear this and like, you know, you want people to...
Speaker: Do know what I mean? Yeah, absolutely. Like I wore this in a photo shoot. You should wear it too. Like we can both wear it and we can both look hot and we can both do the things. And like, obviously I still have a ah what's the word I'm looking for? Like a a value of authenticity, right? Like I don't want you to just wear all of my clothes and just look exactly like me.
Speaker: But ah but also there's something about like if you are attracted to my energy and my style, there's a part of you that also wants to activate that within yourself. So how can we like bring it all together and co-create to create this thing that is so you and if it's parts of me and if it's parts of her and you want to borrow her shoes and her thing and you see someone do something that you love and you want to try it out to like do it as long as it's authentic to you. And that's where it's important to be discerning. Right. When you're learning from people on like, is this actually me or am I trying to be someone?
Speaker: But the beautiful part about hot girl shit is when you're there, you're not trying to be anyone else. You're not just doing it because someone else did it. and and And even for this next hot girl shit, I'm bringing in a lot more um like preparation and coaching to really like prepare people for girl shit where again, it's not just, all right, show up and we'll grab some photos of you.
Speaker: Like I'm in there with you really learning about who are you actually? Like, who are you? What do we want to bring forward? And sometimes I'll even have girls be like, oh, this is a look that I want to do. And I'm like, why?
Speaker: Yes. Why? Because I can see people. Like, I truly can see people. Sometimes I'm like, where is this coming from? Like, why do you want to do this type of look? Why do you want to portray yourself this way? And if it's truly authentic, perfect.
Speaker: But sometimes I'll actually help people see that, like, maybe it isn't. And they're trying to be this whole serious vibe. Yes. Because they feel like they need to be more serious for people to take it them seriously. when in When in person, they're bubbly and smiley and fun. And I'm like, no, no, no sorry. Like, we can get a couple shots like this. Mm-hmm. But we're going to bring forward this. And every time afterwards, they get their photos back and they're like, Maddie, thank you so much because I literally feel like this is me.
Speaker: And I was i was trying to be someone else or I saw this look on Pinterest and I was like, oh, that's how I should portray myself instead of taking who you already are and materializing and manifesting that.
Speaker: Yes. Yeah. And i I feel like I always say too, that you are like a brand psychic because you are very psychic and you can deeply see into people and like always get to the core of, like you said, like, why do you want to do that? Because that also happened to me. I was like, oh I feel like I need to be like more serious or I need to be taken seriously. And it's like, no, actually like people will just take you seriously just because because of like who you are. if you take yourself seriously. Exactly.
Speaker: And that can be silly or fun or cute or whatever. And the people that it does push away, perfect. Because like, there's also something that I love to talk about.
Speaker: when it comes to authenticity, which is even getting into the realm of ethics and being ethical. And you've heard me talk about this before, where it's like, if you're funny and bubbly and spiritual and all of these things and you're like, woo woo, but then you're trying to portray yourself as like serious boss bitch.
Speaker: And then people come into your coaching program because they want this like boss bitch vibe. Then they get into your space and you're actually bubbly, funny, spiritual. woo They are going to be misled.
Speaker: And so even just from an ethical standpoint and from a standpoint, of attracting people that are truly soulmate clients like even right me and elissa where it's like we are good friends we are like i have i feel like a soulmate relationship with you where we just connect on so many levels and like i truly see you as someone so important in my life if you want clients like that you need to be your full self because how are you going to attract going to attract someone that is like the soulmate person if you are not even being yourself You're always going to have those clients that feel misaligned or something is off or they don't agree with you or they ask for a refund.
Speaker: Right. You're not going to get those like soulmate clients. like my ah All of my clients are like people I go to festivals with, that I party with, that i hang out with. I have clients here in Vegas that I like hang out with all the time and I'm able to take on, you know, the friend hat and then put on the coaching hat when I need to. hmm.
Speaker: And it's just such a fulfilling way to run your business, but you can never attract people like that, that love you. and And even from a sales standpoint, be able to get on a sales call and be like, Maddie, I don't even know what this is, but I already just know I want to be in it because it's you.
Speaker: For me, I'm like, that's the type of brand that I'm so proud that I created that I like to help other people create. And those are going to be your best clients that are not just hung up on the flashy marketing and the flashy wins.
Speaker: They see you. And they see parts of themselves in you and they want to be in your energy. They want to be in your space. and And those are the best clients. Yes.
Speaker: And I think you do such a good job of that, of sharing all sides of yourself, which is that what I want to ask you about. So your Costa Rica retreats, can you talk to us about that and like how you met Bianca and like how just you guys like being these like festival girlies and like, like love to party, but also spiritual has like called in like your soulmate clients.
Speaker: Oh my gosh, yeah, this is a great conversation. So I have hot girl shit that I do on my own. And then I also host retreats called Evolve that are hosted in Costa Rica with my co-host Bianca.
Speaker: And i met Bianca through TikTok, which is its own story in and of itself, because I was feeling such a huge nudge to get on TikTok and I fucking hated it. I hated it, but i just kept getting the message from the universe. Like you need to be on TikTok. So I just kept doing it. I had a video blow up.
Speaker: She found me through that video. I actually messaged her one time and she never answered me. And then she messaged me months later and she was like, I'm doing this retreat for content creators. I've been loving your content. You should come.
Speaker: And oh my gosh, I could take this story so many different ways. I actually, that's when I decided to break off my engagement. Oh, was right after I got that message from Bianca.
Speaker: Did you know this? No, I want to hear about it. and Okay. So I was already, I mean, it wasn't just the message from Bianca. There was a lot of things going on where in my relationship, it was one of those things where we were truly on like different paths at that moment.
Speaker: You know, he was trying to figure out what he wanted. i thought I knew what I wanted and I was very adamant on having that. And it was just not connecting. you know, amongst other things. So when I got this message from Bianca, it was like, I knew that I couldn't just go to that retreat and come back.
Speaker: I just got that message and I was like, this is what I want. This is my moment. I wanted it to like go be a digital nomad and go be around other content creators. And I kind of live this like other like non-traditional style life. Right.
Speaker: So I literally, yeah like it was traumatic. Like i broke off my engagement, like gave back the ring, sold everything that I owned, put the rest of it in storage, packed up a suitcase and booked a one-way flight to Costa Rica to go meet Bianca.
Speaker: And I just was like, I don't know where I'm going to go next. I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't know who I am, but I know that I need to go here and I need to go do some shit. And so that's when I met Bianca. And yeah, throughout that retreat, it was very clear that I don't think I could work with anyone else.
Speaker: I do not what work well with people. okay Hence, I am an entrepreneur, a solo entrepreneur. But there is something there with Bianca where it was like, it was very clear. And there's actually a video of us during the retreat where she's like interviewing me and she's like asking me questions about the retreat. Like, how was your trip? How was your experience? And then at the end she goes, and what is our retreat going to be like if we ever host one?
Speaker: And I'm like, my god it was just like natural. And then we had like this whole like trippy experience that we had that like bonded us. And then I went to Tulum and a couple days later, she was like, you need to host my retreats with me. And I was like, absolutely. Yes. Yeah. Oh my god and And we host our first one like two months later. um So at first, right, it was just kind of like spiritual retreats.
Speaker: And then we realized there was a very clear direction. It was like the festival girl spiritual vibe, right? Our retreat is... ah we We say it like it's a spiritual retreat with like fun festival vibes.
Speaker: So it is kind of like a festival vibe. Like we have ecstatic dances, we go to a jungle party, you know, we really match more traditional healing modalities with the fun stuff. And we believe that the fun is just as healing as like the deeper, more traditional work.
Speaker: And So then we really started to shift our marketing and it's been really cool to see. I wish you guys could actually see it in action, but just take my word for it. We started getting so clear in our marketing, like so fucking clear. There was no wishy-washiness. There was no vagueness. It was like, this is for spiritual festival girls who like bass music, who like to party, who liked whatever, and are also spiritual and want to like uplevel their lives.
Speaker: And We started getting so clear that even in our marketing, we would post like the weirdest video. And like, this is so funny, actually, a mutual friend of ours saw one of the videos and she was like, yeah, this would make me not want to come on your retreat. This is weird. It was like, it was a bunch of girls like idolizing their like stuffed animals and like putting them in the middle and like bowing down to their stuffed animals. And we're like if this is not your vibe, don't come on our retreat.
Speaker: Because we are weird, silly girls. And like, we would do like, I don't know, like a synchronized swimming routine in the pool with George Washington hair and like be all weird. And we're like, if this is not your vibe, don't come to our retreat. We just started making it very clear.
Speaker: And now every single call that we get on, every application that we get, we get on that call and the girl will be like, tell us about yourself. She'll tell us about her her herself. And we are literally like,
Speaker: you are, if we could write down on paper who we wanted, it would be you. Like my god every single person that applies, every call we get on, we're like, you are exactly, if we could literally say to the universe, this is the exact person that we want to come on our retreat. It's the person right in front of us.
Speaker: And it's been really magical to watch by how clear we have gotten. how clear what we receive then is. And people are so afraid to be that clear in their marketing or post something weird or post. Yeah. Again, a part of themselves like, um yeah, even the parts of me, right? Like I share about alcohol and substances and things.
Speaker: Thank God, because if you didn't get to see any of that and then you come on my retreat and you see me on my fourth glass of champagne and you're like, what? Like, who is this person? No, I put it all out there.
Speaker: I am honest about who I am. You cannot come on my retreat and say you are a different person than who I thought you were. Maybe, yeah maybe I'm a little cooler than you thought that I was going to be. No, I think you're cool. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. But you what mean? Like, I really just try to put it all out there because like, and again, we never have the people who come on our retreats, they have such an amazing experience because like they know exactly what they're getting. um And I just think that's really important, but especially and specifically for in-person experiences, but also for your coaching experiences, online coaching as well.
Speaker: Yeah, no, I remember, I think I saw reel that you did that was so hilarious, where it was like the egg like dropped on your head or something. And you're like, oh, like the retreat is open or something. And I was just like, I love you guys. like You guys are so funny. And I also like i think it's very courageous, because i know a lot of people... like love to dabble in plant medicine and it's a really big part of their life. um Even partying, like anything. And like, they're just so afraid to like put that out there. But the fact that you're able to be like, no, like this is me. I love it. Like this is part of my spiritual practice. This life, you know, like you really do get a call in people who are like, oh, me too. Like it kind of gives other people courage as well to just like be yourself. Yeah. And again, it's one of those things that like I sign more clients that
Speaker: from when I'm talking about like an acid trip that I had or like drinking, then when I post, here's how to get to 10K months and here's what you need to do. i got i got a message today, literally this morning, this girl messaged me and she's like, hey, I just feel the urge. I've been feeling the urge to like reach out to you for support. And then I saw your video about drinking alcohol and it just confirmed that like I need to talk to you. Like, yes, yes.
Speaker: Like what? You know I think it's so weird because I think we kind of went like in 2020 and COVID. I noticed this like weird shift where people have like tried, especially like in the health industry, have tried to like demonize like alcohol or drugs, you know, just make it seem like, oh, like we want to be like, that's not healthy. And like, I don't know, people like doing sobriety just for like optimization, not necessarily because like they need to be sober, but like to be healthier. And now I feel like this other swing of people are like, no, like these things actually work for me. Like it is fine. Like this could be a part of my life. So I think it's good. Yeah. Just to be your authentic self. Yeah, absolutely. That's,
Speaker: That's it. Just like be authentic. but it's such It's such a buzzword, right? Sometimes or like, sometimes I get frustrated with my own marketing or like explaining what my work is, because like my work is a lot about just being yourself.
Speaker: But it's like, that's something that you get on like a tea towel for your kitchen or like, you know, when I had like shirts from Justice when I was nine years old and you had you had Justice, right? Or like limited to limited. yes. yes And it's like, be yourself. It's like, so it's one of those things where it's almost said so many times that you don't realize like how much that it actually is like the work and how deep it is. So sometimes I get frustrated and my coach is like, I know I'm doing my sales page. I'm like, I just don't know what to say here. And she's like, well, just say what your work really is. And I'm like, be yourself, come learn how to be yourself.
Speaker: But it's like the even deeper layers in all of the conditioning and programming and beliefs that we've created for decades that are preventing our ourselves from being ourselves to like these deeper, intricate little layers. Right.
Speaker: It's not just about like wearing what you want to wear It's I'm so I'm still coming into deeper authenticity with myself. And that's the most mind blowing part, you know? Yeah. That there's always like room to be more ourselves. Yeah.
Speaker: There's put that on a t-shirt. There's yeah always room to be more of yourself. And if you think that you're being fully authentic and you think that you're fully confident, like that's the blind spot in my opinion. Yeah.
Speaker: Yes. Okay. Can something also I love that you share a lot about your life is also your relationship with Henry. So you were just kind of like left us at a little cliffhanger about how you broke up and like left your engagement. So can you kind of just like do a quick recap of like how you guys came back together? Because this is something we also talked about on Maddie's podcast. I was on there last week.
Speaker: um And we talk about like relationships and how people like leave so soon or like they don't give relationships time or they think like if we broke up, then this must not be my person or all of the things. So can you walk us through that?
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. And even one of like um something I really believed was like people don't change. Like people don't change. But it's like ah it's so much more complex than that. And so, yeah, I did leave off on a crazy cliffhanger because if you don't know, I'm now back with the man that I broke off my engagement with.
Speaker: That's a whole story, but I'm like, what do I want to share about that? um So at that time when we broke up, it really was just this misalignment at that time. and And, you know, speaking of not giving up too soon, it wasn't something that I just, like, gave up right away. And it's like he was going through a rough patch, and I just, like, immediately was like, okay, bye right? Because there's going to be moments in your relationship where someone's up and someone's down. And then you're both down, and then you're both up, and then it's vice versa. Mm-hmm.
Speaker: And but this was a thing where for a while we were just in completely different places. And I also had met Henry very young. i was 20 when I met him.
Speaker: And up until that point, I mean, I was in the Mormon religion. i was in a toxic relationship and I worked at In-N-Out Burger. And so like, even that, like in and out, like I was in a uniform every single day.
Speaker: i had never traveled by myself. I had never lived by myself. i had never learned about myself. Like I got out of the Mormon church when I was like 18. And then I was in a toxic relationship until I was like 18, 19. So it's like, i and then I met him right away. And so I always had this like,
Speaker: Wonder. And I always had this like pull towards this like different kind of lifestyle, which was very much like the digital nomad freedom, free spirit kind of vibe.
Speaker: And I'm so grateful that I experienced that for myself, because if I never experienced that, I would have always wondered. And I really did need to experience that to know.
Speaker: And now like there's no questioning. Like there was a time my and Henry's relationship for a long time where I questioned, is this the right relationship for me? Is this who I truly want to be with? Is this the type of life that I want to live?
Speaker: And I just couldn't fight it. Like it was years. I have years of even like journal entries where I was just like, but I like, but he's amazing. And I love him. And like, that's the hard thing too, is leaving a relationship that there's nothing wrong with it.
Speaker: Right. There is like, I think a lot of girls will like relate to this where it's like, I almost wish that he would like cheat on me or something so that I had some reason to leave. But there, yes, there yes there is a It's so complex, right?
Speaker: Yes, at the end of our relationship, there were reasons to leave in terms of just like how we weren't connecting and on the same page. um but But right ah on paper, it's like he's a good guy.
Speaker: i love him so much. But I just knew like I couldn't fight it anymore. And so, yeah, I went off on this journey. I went to Costa Rica. I went to the retreat and then I went to Tulum and then i traveled around and I went to all these festivals and I was like trying to live in Tulum. And I ended up getting like really like sick kind of like it it wasn't fully like a sick like an illness, but like i just had all these things happening in my body where my body was just like.
Speaker: No, like girl, like you, i was just completely dysregulated. i was completely ungrounded. i was not taking care of myself. I was not working on my business in the same way that I was. i was spending way more money than I was making without realizing it at the time.
Speaker: Like everything was just out of whack. But at the time, like I was experiencing like the freedom that I needed to experience. and it was really fun until my body was like, I have had enough.
Speaker: And then I ran into Henry, like physically at a festival. Like I ran into him. Oh my God. And um yeah, we were like, we need to have a conversation. We had a conversation that led to another conversation led to another conversation. And for a while, we were like sneaking around behind people's backs where no one knew that we were meeting up and we were like rendezvousing in different places. And we'd like meet up here and meet up there. And we just like couldn't stay away from each other. And getting back together was not not the easy way, not not the easy thing to do. Like I think that is when it could be dangerous to get back with someone is like if you're just getting back because of the comfort and you guys haven't actually changed.
Speaker: But when we broke up, i thought there was no way in hell we would ever get back together. It was not like, we're going to take a break and work on ourselves so that we can get back together.
Speaker: It's like we went our separate ways. And I was able to learn the things that I needed to learn and experience the things I need to experience. Henry just like... what what I was saying before, like I used to believe like, oh, people, people don't change. People won't change.
Speaker: No, this man just like stepped and into this person that like, I'm so like, I don't want to cry. Like I'm so proud of him for, but he, I don't think that he, I'm sure he would have grown in his own way, but the way our dynamic was at the time, i and how pressuring I was on him and I'm, I'm at fault as well. Like i was so pressuring to him and like,
Speaker: Wanted him to like be this certain person. He couldn't even become the person that I knew he could become because I was like suffocating him. And when we finally split and he was able to just like step into who he is now and then we came back together. And i mean, so we started getting back together. And I mean, it was about two years that we were even long distance. Yeah.
Speaker: that we were just even seeing how we fit back together in each other's lives. And before we broke up, we were so conjoined at the hip. Like we did everything together. We lived in the same room. We didn't have our own offices. We lived with three other people. like And now being able to have our separate lives, like we have separate friends, we have separate things. He goes on trips that I don't go on. I go to festivals. He doesn't come. Like we're not this like conjoined couple.
Speaker: It's like we are now these separate people. We know about ourselves more. We know what we want. And now how can we come back together and almost create a completely different relationship?
Speaker: And i mean, it was just one of the hardest times in my life. It was traumatic. Like I lost friends. I had to have hard conversations, really hard conversations with family and loved ones and people who didn't agree with me and people who saw me as a really bad person for leaving and who didn't understand the whole story and all of this, like so much shit.
Speaker: that we had to work through over two years to finally decide that okay we do want to come back together as the people we are now and we want to learn how to to be this and yeah and we went to therapy together and we didn't we did not that's the problem is i think a lot of people sweep shit under the rug just to be comfortable we did not sweep one thing under the rug.
Speaker: Like, we put it all out on the table. There was one night we talked for probably like 10 to 12 hours and like tears and and anger and like everything.
Speaker: And now I have what I have now. And it's like, I can't explain it. Like I'm, I'm so happy, but it was fucking hard.
Speaker: But I think those are some of the best relationships, right? where i have like literal chills. Yeah. No, I'm like, I literally am on the verge of like crying. cry all the time when I think about him. Cause it's just like, it's, it's been hard. yeah,
Speaker: Yeah, I could go into so many other things that again, like some people have these like expectations of what a relationship needs to be like, and it needs to be like fire and passion all the time. me and Henry sometimes are just like best friends like that, you know, and then I'll have friends that are like,
Speaker: it's Like, I just don't feel that, like, romance and that butter butterflies all the time. I'm like, it's not supposed to fucking be like that all the time. Like, you know, when we first got together, like it like, I was unsure at first. And I had a couple friends of mine and they broke up because one of them was like, um like, if it's my person, like, I'm going know right away and I'm never going to doubt it.
Speaker: Wrong. Wrong. I doubted it I doubted it because I had so much conditioning and stories around what my life should look like and what it should be like and all of these, right? Yeah. Advice that I hear online of this is what it should be like. and course I fucking doubted it.
Speaker: Now I don't. I'm eight years into this. I don't doubt it at all. Like I'm ready to get wifed up and put a baby in me. Let's go. but to even like break off a relationship because you're like, oh, if it's my soulmate, like then I'll know right away.
Speaker: Sometimes it builds. Sometimes you have to have hard conversations. Sometimes you have to go through hard things. That's building an actual genuine relationship. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. Same with me and George. Like we, I just have chills because we also went through a breakup and like twice and then had to get back together. And like in the very beginning of our relationship, he wasn't sure about me. It's just like everything you said, it's like, I feel like that is what creates a beautiful, solid relationship over time. And like so many people just like don't want to put the time into it. And we like, again, we're so conditioned to think of like what all the gurus say online of like,
Speaker: this is how like what a relationship should be like this is what you should look for and it's like can we just see the humanity in people like jesus like we're all just human like well and it even brings it back to the whole like i'm like take my jacket off i'm getting it even brings it back to the business conversation that we were talking about before where like sometimes like my clients and I don't and I don't like shame them for this. They're actually getting my advice and they're curious from what I would do. But sometimes my client will be like, I just got this message. Like, like, how would you respond to it or dah, dah, dah, dah. And I'm like,
Speaker: just respond to them like you would respond to them, like just as a human. Right. Or like the thing that I was saying where I don't have the strict boundary of like I don't coach in the DMs. If someone asks me something and I have time and I'm free and I want to answer, I'll answer. i don't set this like this is how it needs to be or this is like It's just like treat people like humans. Right. And I'm very fluid like that in my business where like I i really do take things like so situationally and like it it depends on so many different factors. But some people like people are trying to look for this like almost tried and true one size fits all framework.
Speaker: whether it's the relationship or how you run your business. But it's like, just be a human. Do you want to answer that message? Do you want to do this? Do you want to do you want to like whatever? i don't know.
Speaker: my My train of thought is kind of leaving me. But and I always tell you, Alyssa, that's one of my favorite things that you always say. You've heard me say this so many times. But Alyssa always says, you don't have a money problem. You have a people problem.
Speaker: And it's like people forget how to act when it comes to money. And even with love, sometimes you like forget how to act because it's like this big thing is on the line. But it's like just human to human.
Speaker: See people as humans. That's why I'm so good at sales. It's like it's just because I'm so human to human, like truly. um And so, yeah, I think with with ah I remember in junior high, i had this. Oh, I've never shared this story. I'm just remembering this.
Speaker: I had this crush on this boy and my friend like started dating him. And she was like so nervous to date him that she'd like always ask us like what to say. And then at a certain point, I was like, hey he's not even dating you. He's dating me because I'm telling you everything to say in your text messages. And it's like we want people to like tell us like what to say or what we should do or what. like We're always asking for advice on like what's the right thing instead of just like actually tapping in with like what do you want? What are your values? How do you want to respond? How do you want to say things? like
Speaker: You know, and it's just when big things are on the line, we like grasp for like what is right and what is wrong. And then we do lose that humanity where we just get caught up in all these rules that we've created or that we've absorbed from other people when it's like just literally be yourself.
Speaker: Yeah, just be yourself. Just be yourself. That's why i i love you as like a mentor. And I know you do like business mentorship, also confidence mentorship. Like you do so many different things like your retreats. But I love how like everything, like, I don't know, like being and and also for anyone listening, like um I've been in Maddie's icon portal. So like business mentorship, like I'm going to be joining Metamorphosis. I'm so excited. And what I love about you is like you are the mentor for people who like,
Speaker: literally bringing it back to themselves like what you said like what do you want to do how do you want to do it and you're really good at helping people like sometimes we don't know ourselves like that's why you know they're probably coming to you or I'm coming to and it's like what do I do and so you do so ah such a great job of like bringing it back to us like you put so much energy and time and like into the relationship of your clients which I think is so special it's so unique like a lot of people have you know, like really huge programs where it's like, you're just a number and like, yeah no one even gets this like one on one time, even if it's not one on one time, even in your group programs, it still is like there's like a one on one aspect, because you're so good at like, deeply knowing people. Do you feel like that's also like kind of a like contributes to your success in your business?
Speaker: Sorry, wait, it kind of cut out. so more time Do you feel like that like contributes a lot to the success in your business? Is like that like relationship, obviously? Definitely. Yeah. Yeah. No, sorry. i wasn't making that look at like the question. I was just like, dude, yes.
Speaker: um No, it's such a great question because it it it like it is relationships. That's all it is. And i definitely think that the energy that I put in like the energy and the care that I put into things, and I don't do it because of what I get out of it. Right.
Speaker: Right. Like, yes, of course, it's a businesswoman. i'm like, okay, i want to give people a great client experience and like customer service or whatever. but it's it's not even that it's like, I'm not, I don't care because I want to get something out of it.
Speaker: But at the same time, I will say like, yes, I think that's definitely why people stay in my world for years and come back time and time again and keep doing programs and keep doing things with me.
Speaker: It's Like I've been in many spaces where I don't feel like I'm actually given the time of day or I feel like coaches are kind of being lazy with me or, you know, ah yeah, I'm not going to say more on that. But yeah, I think people really lose the truth that business is relationships. And, you know, again, even like in terms of like,
Speaker: You can do whatever you want in your business, okay? Like, you can do whatever you want. If you don't want to talk to people in the DMs, if you don't want to do sales calls, you don't have to. And you can build your business to a point where you have a reputation and the demand that you can just put up a link and people buy.
Speaker: And also some people are at the beginning of their businesses and they're like, I just like don't want to reach out to people. It just feels like icky. Like, I don't want to talk to people. Oh, I saw someone else that's making one hundred k months and she doesn't do sales calls. And so like, I'm not going to do sales calls.
Speaker: And I'm just like, dude, like talk to your people. Like, what do you mean? Like coaching is literally about helping people, but you like refuse to talk to people. Like make it make sense. Again, yes, can you you can do whatever you want in your business. If you really fucking hate sales calls, like you can just talk to people in the DMs or yes, you can grow your business to the point where you just like put up a link and people buy.
Speaker: But I think there's a lot of women who are trying to build their business and they're so confused on why it's not working. And it's because they just won't fucking talk to people. And I just think it's crazy.
Speaker: Like, that's literally the business that we are in is helping people. Where did we get away from that and decide that, like, I don't want to talk to people? Yeah, it's it is crazy because it's like service is like to get prosperity. It's through being of service. so it's like, how can we be of service if we're not actually like talking to people? Yeah, it exactly. Sorry, I'm getting my charger.
Speaker: Oh, no, no worries. um Yeah. ah yeah something Something else I wanted to ask you that I just think is like so interesting, especially like, okay, so so many people in my world, I have met through Maddie's world. And so it's so fun whenever I'm talking to someone and we're like figuring out how we know each other and like, oh, like Maddie, like I did this thing with Maddie. Like, i don't know. It's just so fun. Can you walk us through like, what is a day in the life will look like for you as a business owner? Because also I think for a lot of people that are starting businesses,
Speaker: there's a little confusion on like, what are we actually doing? Where is this time being wasted? um And I can also say as being a client of yours and a friend, like you are one of the most like structured and organized people I've ever met when it comes to business. And you balance like masculine and feminine energy so good. And you always talk about this where it's like, you're very heart led. You're very intuitive. You're psychic as hell, but you also have structures and like, you are very put together. So can you kind of talk to us about like, Maybe what does a day in the life look like and how did you like get so good at just like being organized? Yeah, well, thank you. Thank you for all that. I i agree that i I balance them very well. I'm very like the feminine and the masculine are are here. um
Speaker: i actually was just as I was like going to sleep last night, I told you that like my brain wouldn't turn off and I was like about to fall asleep. And I was like, oh, my God, I have to write this down. i'm going to make a post about exactly this.
Speaker: um so it's sitting in my notes right now, just like a jumble of like this, what I'm about to say right now. So I'm glad you asked this because guys, i like, I'm going to brag.
Speaker: I have the best life. Like I get to do all these retreats. I have all these friends. I have my soulmate. I have this freedom. I get to do what I want. Like I've built this successful business. I do all these things. Like, okay.
Speaker: I work my fucking ass off. Like, I'm sorry if i ever made it look like this is like easy. It's not. I try to be very transparent.
Speaker: And that's what's dangerous about marketing sometimes is people want to make it look like it's super easy so that you pay them because you obviously want the easiest route.
Speaker: And yes, in coaching, i am going to teach you ways to get to where you want. easier and faster. and at the same time, like when it comes to business specifically, it's like so hard because people are like, oh, I made a this much money and right. $50,000 in seven days. And I only worked 10 hours and I didn't do any sales calls and blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: And it just like creates this like, again, yes, you can get your business to that point. Sure. They're usually lying. They're usually lying a little bit or stretching the truth a lot. But you can get to your your business to a point that looks something like that. But it's so damaging for people who are just starting out and still building.
Speaker: And like, I work my fucking ass off. Like, what does my day look like? I mean, so I wake up. I am not a morning routine girly.
Speaker: Like, so it depends. Like, if I'm really struggling, then sometimes, like, I'll have, like, a morning routine where I need to, like, sit down and journal and, like, work on my energy. For the most part, i get up. I eat breakfast.
Speaker: I grab my coffee. And I sit the fuck down at my computer. and I definitely work, like, eight hours a day. Eight to ten hours. Sometimes longer if I'm in a launch. Or Henry's gone right now. He's traveling. And so, like, I've just been working.
Speaker: Just that's all I do. Because i love it. And he's not here. And so I just work. Um... But like, yeah, I focus on content a lot.
Speaker: Obviously focus on serving my clients. um
Speaker: And then I, yeah, sometimes I have like sales pages and things to do. What's like the other thing? Yeah. And then like messaging people, talking to people, inviting people to things. If I'm going a launch, I'm doing sales calls.
Speaker: But there that's when I'm like kind of intuitive. Like I sit down and I'm like, it's time to work. um I love my Trello. I love my Google calendar. So like I stay very organized and like what's actually priority. i think that's one thing that's not taught in entrepreneurship enough is like productivity and how to actually like organize yourself. And what happens is we end up just getting like busy instead of productive.
Speaker: And so I have little things that help me as well of like I have like my little timer that if I'm really like all over the place and I need to set like 20 minutes and it's like. You you have this much time to write this email, don't do anything else. So I'll use like my little timer and then like I have like a pad of paper that I write down, like everything that I'm doing that are actual like needle moving activities. So I have like my Trello that has like everything that want to do, need to do.
Speaker: And then every day I look at my Trello and then i actually write down like the four to five things that are like, I need to do this. And I go one by one and I cross it the fuck off. Because if I don't do that, yeah, oftentimes I'll just like find myself three hours later down like a doom scroll.
Speaker: hole and I'm like, wait, what am I doing? So I'm always writing down like, what are the actual needle moving moving things? Okay, going to send 10 invites today. I'm going post a talking video. I'm going to obsessed training. I'm going to set up this email funnel and I'm going to work on some trial reels.
Speaker: And I literally go down and I cross them off. But I also do it when like I also follow that feminine energy like what I'm wanting to do. So if I'm like, OK, I need to write these emails, but it's not feeling that fun.
Speaker: And sometimes it doesn't always have to be fun. Sometimes it's just uncomfortable and I just do it. But sometimes I'll be like, OK, I need to write these emails, but i also need to record a podcast. And I'm feeling that come through way more than the emails right now. i don't want to sit here and type. I want to speak.
Speaker: So then I'll record the podcast first. So that's where my like my feminine comes in, where I do listen to like, okay, what am I feeling called to and inspired to do? But I have to keep myself very much like on track. Because if you don't, like me and Henry, we don't call it time management. We call it focus management.
Speaker: Like you need to learn how to manage your focus. Like not just time block, but literally be able to sit down and be like, I'm doing this one thing and I'm going to do it. um If you don't, yeah, I'm dilly-dallying on my website. I'm checking my messages in like a cycle, right? I check Telegram, Instagram, and then my texts.
Speaker: And then it's three hours later, what did you actually do to move the needle forward in your business? You know? um But yeah, like my life, like Henry usually has to force me to eat because I'm so in my work that he'll like bring me lunch to my desk and I like eat at my desk because I'm like, yeah. And...
Speaker: But then it depends on the day. Sometimes I have a photo shoot and sometimes I have a retreat. Sometimes I'm traveling and that's something I'm still balancing is the work play balance. um But yeah, guys, like I sit at my desk a lot.
Speaker: I do so that I'm able to go like, you know, when I was traveling for a month, I took a month off of work. And I get to do that because I put in the work in other places. And something I just feel inspired to say that's like very blunt, but I feel like someone needs to hear it.
Speaker: If you have to force yourself to work on your business and you feel like working on your business for even like two to three hours a day is like a chore, then maybe don't have a business.
Speaker: If you're just starting. and yeah If you're just starting a business because you want freedom and because you want to get out of your nine to five and that's the only reason you're doing it. Maybe don't start a business, maybe just go find a nine to five that you actually like, because like, I'm sorry, it doesn't matter whose marketing is selling you this vision and romanticizing it and making it look easy and whatever.
Speaker: Like every entrepreneur that I know, even the ones that do put up like flashy things that are like, this is my life. They work their ass off. and But I love it. I love it. I like can't stop working.
Speaker: Yeah. And that's how you know you're aligned, which is what I love. Like you're such an inspiration because you do have like literally all parts of your life are so filled. Like there's some, you know, some people,
Speaker: maybe they're doing really well in one part of their life and they're working on another part of their life. I feel like you're like, you you do a really good job of kind of like balancing everything. I know you said you're also working on like the work-life balance, but I think it is good for people to know, like if you want to be successful, you have to put in the time, the effort, and you should want to, because it's our business. Like it's fun. If it's not fun, girl, change something about it.
Speaker: Exactly. Exactly. If it's not fun, there is something that is out of alignment. And that's the truth. Right. like And like you said, it's not every task that's going to be fun, but the overall mission, like if it is fun, like that's what drives you to like do the other stuff, you know? Yeah. and make it fun, make it iconic. Like I often also use my 3D reality to make things more fun. So like, yeah, I just read in my office because I like didn't want to spend time in my office because I didn't like how it looked. So like and it doesn't have to be a full office remodel doesn't even have to cost you a penny or maybe it costs you like under $100 just like
Speaker: set up a nice space and like get some new art prints. And like, maybe you want a new mic or you go thrift some new jewelry that makes talking videos really fun because you're excited to have your jewelry on. And, you know, i i put a speaker, a big speaker in my office and I blast music and like get your favorite drink. Like yeah sometimes you also have to kind of like,
Speaker: parent yourself and it's like, okay, we're going to do some contracts today that are not very fun, but I'm going to get you a matcha and we're going play our favorite songs and we're going just like try to make it fun.
Speaker: Like you can also create magic in like the little moments and in the mundane to make it more fun, you know? And so I've just always made it like also like an iconic experience. If I don't feel like doing talking videos. Yeah, maybe I don't like what I'm actually talking about. Maybe I don't like how I look. Maybe I don't like the lighting.
Speaker: okay, get a new little light or go set yourself up somewhere cute and like actually do your hair so that you actually want to show up on camera. Like there's actually also ways in the 3D and in your expression to actually make yourself excited to show up, you know, which again, it's just like those little ways in which if it's not fun, like something is off.
Speaker: If you have to force yourself to do it something is off. Yeah. I feel like so many of these teachings too, like kind of like segueing or seg, what is the word? sewi like weighing god Segwaying. Yeah, segueing into your launch of Metamorphosis that you are bringing back as an actual program instead of a membership. Can you talk to us about that? Because I feel like, oh yeah, if you guys can see, if you're like, if you can't see we're looking at her beautiful photo of her brand for Metamorphosis. um i feel like a lot of the things we just talked about are things they're going to cover in there is about like how to find these like sparks of joy back and like, you know, just from like beautifying your life and like finding whimsy and all of the things. So can you tell us about that and like, yeah, who you're really calling in?
Speaker: Yeah, absolutely. so yeah, metamorphosis is a really deep program. And yes, there are elements of it that are like finding the fun and finding your expression and things like that.
Speaker: But the way that I teach confidence is actually very spiritual and very deep because it is about the way that you are perceiving the world and perceiving yourself. And like we talked about earlier, like the the programming, the the conditioning.
Speaker: sorry, the conditioning, the beliefs, like all of these things that have made you less than like, I'm not just giving confidence tips of like, here's how to be a little more confident today.
Speaker: Like we're going into the fucking depths of why you're not confident and the voices you've heard your whole life and why they're even there and how to actually shift that. And sometimes shifting that is actually like diving into these like deeper layers and feelings and emotions. And, you know, there's also a lot about like the nervous system and nervous system regulation because confidence This is just like a fun little thing. So confidence, the things that you experience when you're lacking confidence are like overthinking, comparison, doubt, fear, people pleasing, perfectionism, caring what other people think of you.
Speaker: Right. Those are kind of like the confidence monsters. I should think of like a name for them. Right. They're like the confidence dealers. But all of those are forms of protection.
Speaker: So when you're dysregulated and when you are in a state of fight or flight, those things are going to come up more because you're even more trying to protect yourself because you already feel unsafe in your body.
Speaker: So it's also a very, and when I say nervous system regulation, this is not about like meditating more. This is about a holistic approach to the places that you were giving too much energy, to the places where you were out of alignment, to the way that you structure your days, your productivity, the way that you think about things.
Speaker: Like it's so much, and that's why it's a six month program. It's not just you learn confidence tips. It is this journey into even understanding why you're feeling so much fear and why why you're feeling so much doubt.
Speaker: And shifting your frequency and your state to where those things don't overpower as much because you get out of this protective mode. And it's a lot about acceptance.
Speaker: It's a lot about ego or the lack of ego. It is kind of this ego death in a sense. So it's a really deep program. And yes, there are some sessions where it's fun and there's little confidence challenges of like, you know, get ready every day this week or whatever. Like, yes, but And the the bulk of my work when it comes to confidence is not surface level.
Speaker: It's very deep. And when it comes to who I'm calling in for this, it really is like any woman who is holding herself back, who feels like she is dimming herself, who feels like her relationships are not where she wants it, her money is not where she wants it, and understanding that confidence It's not actually another strategy or hack or ritual that's going to get you there, but it's who you start to become, how you start to perceive yourself, what you believe you are worthy of, what you believe you can even achieve, regulating yourself to the point where you even have the capacity to create that.
Speaker: Like big shit. And so I have ah many different levels that come into this program from a beginner level of girls that come in that maybe just went through a really traumatic breakup and they're like, I don't even know who I am.
Speaker: I hate myself. I'm struggling. i don't even know what I want in this life. All the way to entrepreneurs who are pretty successful, but know that they are not, they're afraid to be seen or they keep letting their boundaries slip or they're afraid to charge their worth. And the beautiful thing about the program is that all of those levels can exist.
Speaker: in that program because the philosophies are the exact same no matter what level you're at. And the philosophies and the tools that I use, I still use to this day. The same things that made me stop hating myself are the same things that have helped me generate over seven figures in my business.
Speaker: Like they're one in the same because it is all about the belief work and the identity work. And so anyone that is experiencing any type of fear, doubt, limiting beliefs, comparison, caring what people think of you, feeling like you can't actually just fucking show up and be that main character and fucking claim what you want. that You don't even believe you can have what you want or you believe it, but you're so scared to take that action.
Speaker: Like all of it is is transformed inside of metamorphosis. Oh my God. I'm personally so excited for myself. I'm so excited. Because like, oh, even just listening to right now, I have chills. I'm like, oh my God. I'm so excited for you. It feels like such a like beautiful, um kind of like quantum leap. But it's like, I love that it is six months so that we can actually have the time that it takes to like go into the depths of it you know and like have that support. for like I just feel like that's so important to have that like longer term support.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, exactly. Exactly. I'm so, so excited for you to experience it. Like, it's it's incredible the things that I've watched happen in this program. And it like it literally is a metamorphosis. Like, you go from caterpillar to chrysalis to butterfly, but it cannot be rushed and it cannot happen and just... it It's not like...
Speaker: It's not like a hack, you know, like a lot of people online. It's just like, just do this one thing. Just do this one journal practice. Just do this one ritual. And like, I'm really just owning the fact that my work isn't flashy in that way.
Speaker: My work is the work. And that's why it's so life changing. Yeah, I love that you even have the disclaimer of like, don't join if you don't want your life to be like drastically different. Because there will be things that will probably have to be removed.
Speaker: Absolutely. But funny thing on that. So I've actually had multiple people that I've been on like sales calls with for Meta say to me, I know that I need to join this, but I don't want to because I know that things are going to change in my life.
Speaker: And I know I'm going to have to let go of this relationship or this job or this. But the beautiful thing is, and they've said to me specifically, they're like, Maddie, like, I'm scared you're going to tell me to do this.
Speaker: But the reason why such big shifts happen in metamorphosis is not because I force you to or I tell you to and I say you have to let go of this relationship. You have to let whatever. Well, maybe sometimes I do if it's really like if you need a kick in the ass and I'm like, girl, you've got to let go of this relationship.
Speaker: But most of the time, it's not because I like force you to. it is because you actually cultivate the power in order to be ready for that. That is why it happens. Like I don't force these girls to break up with people. I don't force these girls to move from their hometown that they've never left and move to Hawaii and meet their soulmate.
Speaker: They do that on their own because they actually feel confident enough to do it, which is the beautiful part. And I need to put that on my sales page. Yes. Because I've gotten a lot of that before where girls are like, I'm so nervous to join. and I'm like, I'm not going to make you do anything that you don't want to do.
Speaker: But the reality is your standards are going to raise so much that it's actually going to feel easy to make these big changes and you're actually going to want to and you're going have the support to actually do it.
Speaker: That is so powerful because so many people I know are on a pre precipice of like a huge change and they know what to do but like it's so terrifying. So I love that your work actually gives them the confidence within to be like oh I can do this. It's like taking control back over their lives and having that empowerment.
Speaker: Yeah, exactly. Exactly. Sometimes it's hard to do it when you're just like sitting alone in your bedroom and everyone else around you is also not growing. But when you step into and and that's part about meta as well, it is very like sisterhood vibes. Like I look at girls like Instagrams from people who did meta four years ago and I still see the other meta girls in their comments or every once while I'll get like a picture of two of the girls together, like in person where they like met up at a festival or something. And it's like,
Speaker: There is this family and sisterhood that is created where it's very difficult to make changes in your life when you are surrounded by people who are not doing the same. But when you get into a community of everyone that is doing it together and supporting each other and seeing you and right, like a lot of people, a lot of girls, they might tell their friends like, oh, I want to start this business. And they're like, OK, you can try like.
Speaker: but the building a business is hard but then you get into meta and you're like you share your idea of your business and you have 15 other girls that are like fucking do it i see this for you and here's what you can do and here's how let me help you and like do that and they're giving you all this energy like it's so much easier to transform in that community in that sisterhood of like-minded people who are doing the same things Yes. And I also can say as a testament of your work is that if you really love Maddie and resonate with Maddie, like she only attracts the most beautiful, just like like-minded women. Like it's just insane. like I attract the best people. The best people. Sometimes when I am lacking in my own confidence, I look at the people around me and I say, wow, I'm an energetic match for these people because I am so...
Speaker: Like I adore and admire and i'm and inspired by the people in my spaces like my communities is one of the best. It's really fun. It really is. yeah Oh my goodness. Yes. Okay. This has been literally so amazing. Is there anything that you want the world to know? Any last thoughts about anything? Confidence? What's on your heart?
Speaker: yeah
Speaker: Be yourself. Be yourself. Like be your fucking self. And um I feel like the last thing I'll say is it's so much like you get to choose your heart in life.
Speaker: And it's so much more miserable to think about doing something and to think about who you want to be than to actually just do it. Both of them are uncomfortable. To stay where you are is uncomfortable and to transform into this new version of you is also uncomfortable. But I'm telling you the discomfort and the reward that you get from actually just doing the thing and making the moves is far better.
Speaker: than thinking about it. I've had so many moments in my life where i just sit there and I just think about it. Oh, should do this and I want to do this. It's miserable. Is it also uncomfortable to actually fucking do it? Yes, but it's so fucking worth it.
Speaker: It's so fucking worth it. And just like remind yourself of that. And if you haven't experienced that yet, because you haven't yet done the thing, Like look for expanders who have done the thing that you have done that have the thing that you want and let them inspire the fuck out of you that actually is fucking worth it. And just like do the damn thing.
Speaker: Just do it. It's so much better on the other side. Yes, literally. I was just talking about this the other day too. It's like, yeah, the pain that we feel of just thinking, thinking I'm going to do it. I'm going to do it. And like not doing it. It's just like, just don't even say you're going to do it or just do it.
Speaker: Exactly that. Exactly that. And that's what I was even saying about like the business thing, right? Where it's like, if you have to force yourself to do it, then maybe just don't do it because you're making yourself miserable thinking about having to do it and wanting to do it and then not actually doing it. And then you're in this like dissonance with yourself where you're saying you want to do something, but then you're not doing it. And that is the worst place to be. I've, I've literally told clients, like, I think you should just shouldn't do this because you're making yourself miserable thinking about doing it. Either do it or don't and don't want and don't want it anymore.
Speaker: Yes. Like, I love that. Exactly that. And so, like, I think that's my my last thing is just, like, fucking do it. And if you want support in doing it, hire Maddie.
Speaker: Yes. Hire me Come to Meta. It's really fun. i made it sound a little scary because it's, like, really deep work, but also it's, like, really fucking fun. So... Yes. And you'll be with me too. Just kidding. Yes, exactly. You'll be with both of us We fucking got you. And um yeah, I'm, I'm really, really excited.
Speaker: Okay. Amazing. Thank you so much, Maddie, for coming and just like sharing with us and just, yeah, having such an open heart and sharing all your magic. I appreciate it so much. And everyone go and find Maddie. Oh, where can people find you? i'm going to put everything in the show notes, but where's the best way?
Speaker: Yes. Yeah. Put in the show notes. I'm an Instagram girly. So Instagram, my Instagram is Maddie Maple, M-A-D-I Maple, like the syrup. And then, yeah, I also have my podcast that Alyssa was just on. So definitely make sure you check out that podcast as well, because obviously this one was all about me, but we have one all about Alyssa and she shares some really fun stories and shares about the Gene Keys, which is one of my favorite things. And um yeah, so make sure you check that out. My podcast is Breaking Butterfly. And yeah, please like reach out to me. Like don't be intimidated or scared or think that I don't answer. i answer every single one of my messages. So like if you had a breakthrough during this, an aha moment, I'd love to hear from you. I love to chat and talk to people like we were saying. So yeah, I'd love to hear from you and would love the chance to support you if it's a good fit.
Speaker: Okay, amazing. Thank you, guys. I hope you have the best day. and Thank you for having me, Alyssa. Thank you. Thank you. Bye-bye. Bye, guys.
