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24: Feminine Led Structure & Systems That Reduce Stress For Women With Big Dreams & Goals
27 Plays3 months ago
In order for you to THRIVE in your feminine & lead your life from that energy, you NEED to redevelop your relationship with your masculine. This is for women who either struggle with having systems/structure in place so they can achieve their goals OR for the women who have been lowkey traumatized from operating in their masculine for so long that they resist systems/structure because they don't want to feel burnt out again or feel lost in how to re-create it while allowing their feminine to thrive. AKA every woman needs this!
In this episode i share:
- stories/examples of how I've been implementing everything i share inside
- how to reduce stress (esp mentally where it always starts) with practical tips/hacks
- feminine time management
- feminine systems/structure that you can start implementing TODAY to reduce stress & feel more supported
- how to be more proactive from a regulated place v.s. stress response
- and so much more!! Take notes cause there's lots to dive into!!
Enjoyed this episode? Give it a 5 stars & share with a friend. Send me a screenshot of your review on IG @darshvibess (screenshot before you submit the review), and I'll send you a free gift ;) ORRRR just leave me a review anyway haha ilyyyy
Let's connect ;)
Watch on Youtube: @itsdarshna
Follow + connect with me on Instagram: @darshvibess
Tiktok: @itsdarshna
Have feedback + topic requests? Send me a DM on IG
Contact for Collab/Work with me: nextleveldarsh@gmail.com.
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Transcript
Birthday Break and Personal Growth
00:00:00
Speaker
Hello everybody and welcome back to the She's Next Level podcast. It is raining outside, so today I'm in the house recording a brand new episode for you guys and I'm really excited to dive deep into this one because, wait, hold up, before we even get to all of that,
00:00:16
Speaker
I have to share an update with you guys. I literally was gone for the entire week last week. It was my birthday week. So I was in um Scottsdale and then I was in Austin visiting my friends and having a lot of fun. So that's why there wasn't a podcast episode released last week, but it was much needed. um Something that I really, really love is just exploring new places and like just spending time, quality time with my friends and,
00:00:43
Speaker
Obviously family too, which is I'm always around my family now, but especially with my friends and because I've had a history of moving around so much in my life, all my friends are fucking spread out. Like all of them are everywhere but here where I live. So it felt so good to just reconnect, vibe and really disconnect too.
00:01:03
Speaker
disconnect from my business and everything.
Balancing Energies: Feminine vs. Masculine
00:01:07
Speaker
And, you know, sometimes I feel like it's become very norm, I guess, like a lot of industry leaders, a lot of millionaires out there, coaches and everybody that always say like, yeah, like it obviously it's like normal and make it feel like it's normal. to work while you're on vacation. You're just not working as much. And for me, I really got to know more about myself. And I was like, you know, I really just fully love disconnecting and having fun. And so i am now in the process of like figuring out what that structure and what that flow looks like for me.
00:01:39
Speaker
And that would just mean like a lot of pre-planning and just moving things around. And funny because today's episode is literally all around creating a feminine structure. It's essentially technically your masculine structure,
00:01:52
Speaker
for your feminine to thrive, but it's it's a feminine system. It's a feminine way of going about reaching your goals, taking action, all of that jazz. And I've been really learning a lot recently from my mentor, who's a feminine embodiment coach and a leader.
00:02:07
Speaker
And it's been so amazing. I'm in this like 12 month mastermind type of experience with her. It's like, the most I've ever invested in a program and like just being around that kind of vibe and just that next level energy has been really helpful for me and just implementing some of the things like little tweaks and things that have really been massively impacting my life in a positive way. And it's been really cool because she's been really diving deeper into like productivity and systems and like You're doing things in a way like from not in a burnt out masculine structure that you may have had prior. And I feel like if you are listening to this podcast episode, you were drawn to this episode, it's because you probably felt that same way of being burnt out in your masculine for so fucking long. And you have had these systems in place that you were following and like doing things, taking action, you know being productive. The word discipline, I fucking hate that word. I personally like devotion. It's just more lighter. It's more fun. So just having like a personal discipline and well, we're going to get rid of that word. Personal devotion that, you know, you would have towards yourself. I think there's a very fine line between being...
00:03:22
Speaker
devoted, disciplined, whatever, to being, you know, too far into that route where you're just, like, being so rigid where you don't have any flexibility. And that's what really fucks a lot of women. Fucked me a lot for a long time. It's just, like, I was so, like, stuck in my routine in a way where it's, like...
00:03:40
Speaker
It's my way or no way. It's this is the way. And then when life starts to happen and like things would start getting out of control, i would be like, oh, my God, i don't know what to do. Like this was supposed to go this way. Like, let me know.
00:03:52
Speaker
Hit me up on Instagram. If you don't follow me on Instagram, go ahead and follow me on there. It's Darsh Vibes, D-A-R-S-H-V-I-B-E-S-S. And then I also have TikTok. Everything's in the description. But let me know if you have felt the same way where it's like,
00:04:08
Speaker
you know, you're now working on learning more about feminine energy because you've been burnt out in your masculine for so long and you're now moving towards that way, right? But what I find most women, including myself, is what happened is that we end up swinging all them on the motherfucking way to the other side in our feminine because it feels good, right? It feels good to really be in your feminine more, to let go more and...
00:04:30
Speaker
Just like let go of that control, let go of like just trying to be the initiator, trying to take action all the time, just allowing yourself to be in the receiving energy, right? Because that's all about feminine.
00:04:41
Speaker
It feels so good being there that now you end up thinking about like the masculine energy of like taking action, being like goal oriented and like really being focused and head on.
00:04:52
Speaker
And then you start to... kind of like, and I said this in the previous episode around being like taking action is a dirty word, but it's actually not like, it's not, it's just that the way that you've been doing it and going about it has not been from a feminine leadership way, like from a feminine aligned, authentic
Creating Flexible Systems
00:05:10
Speaker
way. And so that is what we're going to debunk. I'm going to share some of the tips.
00:05:15
Speaker
Obviously there's a whole lot that I have learned. Um, but yeah, The biggest thing that I've learned in my life is the more I learn, obviously the more I learn, the more I still have yet to discover. But also the more I learn, the more I need to simplify and start putting in different systems and different things in place, like integrating one by one. If I give you the a whole fucking pie, it's gonna be too much for you. I got to give you like a piece, get you started, get you hooked, and get you going. So I'm going to share some of the most important takeaways and things that I have been implementing and that I have really enjoyed that has helped me in creating better structure and systems for myself to be allow myself to be able to win. like give myself that ability and that structure and that support because that's what the masculine ah structure is for you. The systems, the routines, the habits, like everything that you fucking do, it needs to support you. And if it's not supporting, you need to get rid of that shit. You need to get rid of it completely or you need to fucking tweak it some way. And so I'm going to be sharing some of the ways that you can do that just to to be aware of it.
00:06:23
Speaker
And I don't like after listening to this episode, guys, like if it's a lot for you, I just want you to be aware and just awareness can bring a lot of clarity. So just be aware of everything I share. Just be aware of where you're doing it in your life, right? Where there were the areas of your life where you can implement this.
00:06:40
Speaker
Don't go implement it right away. Just be aware. and Then from awareness, then you can take the step of implementing at least one thing. and I want to know after this whole episode, after you implement it, I want to know what you did and how it worked out for you again on Instagram. Hit me up, girl.
00:06:57
Speaker
but Let's get into it. so What I want you guys to know and what I've noticed for myself as well as I was more aware of this is that the biggest problem fucking stress reliever.
00:07:08
Speaker
Okay, the biggest stress reliever, the thing that allows you to live more life more stress free is to be more flexible in your structure in your systems and your routine, your habits, be more flexible in your life. Now I had did have somebody in my tick tock the other day, you know, I made a um ah post about it. And she was saying that like, well, yeah, I mean, discipline and routine is what got me here in the first place. So if I let it go, if I'm more flexible, then I'm not going to be able to do what I want to do. And this is for you if you felt that way. I want you to know is that you feel that way because you don't feel like you have your own back.
00:07:47
Speaker
Like because you feel like if you don't have that, if you lose that structure and discipline, that you're going to lose control of your life and that you're going to not show up for yourself in the way that you have been showing up for yourself. So that is more of a self-trust issue. And it's not more of like the system thing of like the self-discipline thing and the reason why you're not allowing yourself to be more flexible. It's more about trusting yourself to know like, okay, you know what?
00:08:10
Speaker
If that is in your mind, take your brain there. Like take your, cause your brain is always scanning for safety. Like that's what, how it operates. creates this familiarity safety. And so take your brain there and tell your brain, okay, so like what happens, what would happen essentially, hypothetically, if I stop showing up for myself in this way, like if I just cut out the routine completely for a day or like something happens and I'm unable to do it, am I gonna be able? You need to feel so grounded, safe and secure when shit does ever hit the fan. So take your brain there and be like,
00:08:44
Speaker
okay, what would I do if this happens? Like what would be my alternative? Like what would need to be in place? And this is why the first thing I will share with you guys is having a contingency plan. I have learned that having a plan B, plan C, plan D is going to reduce the fucking mental stress that you will experience because life will happen as it does when you allow yourself to have more flexibility in your schedule. it doesn't mean that plan B, plan C, plan D have to be full in effect and you have to like just not follow through with the original plan, but it is there as a safety net for you. It is there as a, I got your back. It allows you to build more of that trust within yourself so that you know, okay, if,
00:09:28
Speaker
you know, shit doesn't work out the way I want it to, if, you know, um I fall out of this routine or habit, I have something that will get me going back up again and being able to have that compassion and grace for yourself. Because the last thing you want to do is ever be hard on yourself for not like being on your shit. Like, okay, maybe if you miss one day of your habit, like it's, it's the last thing you want to do is also not have that fear of like, oh my God, if I,
00:09:55
Speaker
you know, get out of this habit or routine or whatever, then I'm going to fall back into that old habit. And I've seen this time and time a again. This is why people don't achieve their goals and reach their goals is because they don't have that strong foundation, words. They don't have that strong foundational trust within themselves to have their own back. And that's because they don't have a contingency plan. The whole fucking world is going to be like,
00:10:20
Speaker
Don't be thinking of plan B. Think of plan A, like in the whole manifestation world. And like, you know, it's like self-sabotaging if you're thinking about like any doubts or like, okay, having a plan B. No, bitch. It is reducing mental stress because life will be life as it is.
00:10:35
Speaker
We only have control in how we respond to life. We don't have control in how things happen in our life. Well, Side note, technically we do because of our EMF field, which is our energy field. And that's what like broadcasts and radiates like the way that people, situations, circumstance, events respond to us because we create our own reality. So technically we do because we're able to program certain beliefs, thoughts, actions, things in our energy field to have life respond the way that we want to. But however,
00:11:08
Speaker
Name one motherfucking person that is like literally sitting there besides me. I'm probably like the most like nerded out about this stuff. But like that's out there like literally on top of their fucking energy consciously all the time. We're not. And so that's okay when life happens and technically we created that which is fine.
Mental Clarity and Task Prioritization
00:11:27
Speaker
But whenever life does happen it's okay. We can be able to navigate and adjust and not lose our mental fucking peace of mind.
00:11:37
Speaker
By always having some type of contingency plan or pre-planning ahead for yourself in some way that, okay, if this happens, I know that I would do this. And that way we're not fucking stuck in our head trying to figure things out and like in this mental chaos. Okay. So having flexibility in your masculine structure, whatever habits, routines, things that you have going on. Now,
00:12:01
Speaker
The biggest stress contributor that I want you to pay attention to that we're gonna talk about and if there's anything that you take away, I want you guys to take away everything, but really pay attention and remember this, the biggest stress contributor that causes you to feel overwhelmed or stressed or even overthinking or self-doubt or whatever is having too many mental tabs open.
00:12:24
Speaker
Mental tasks, mental tabs, just too much going on in your brain. And this comes from trying to figure everything out at once in your head and having like all of these mental tabs of mental tasks that you need to do and not actually prioritizing the most important ones that move the needle for you and give you the highest energetic ah ROI. So ROI in business stands for return on investment. And so when I'm saying energetic ah ROI, it's what's giving me the most mental clarity, mental space, energetically, what tasks can I do
00:13:02
Speaker
that I can prioritize that clear up so much mental space because they're taking up so much of my energy, they're consuming so much of my energy because it's, you know, so important or I'm like really emotionally attached to it or like I just feel like a sense of relief if I do it. What are those things? It's not always about what makes the most sense. OK, a lot of people get this wrong. And when they think of ah ROI and especially in business, bitch,
00:13:26
Speaker
fucking done this so many times and I have a story to share with you guys which made me realize this and implement this but a lot of people when they think ROI like they think logically okay like obviously prioritize the business and prioritize this and this and this without thinking about prioritizing like, no, what is the thing that's taking up the most mental space up for me? Knowing yourself. This is a big fucking journey that's going to make you learn yourself because when you learn and know about yourself and know like what is the the biggest thing that's eating up a lot of my energy, like what is taking up a lot of space in my mind, then you know how to organize your life so much better and what to prioritize. And I just want to mention that it's not always like the big things that you would think. Sometimes it's like the small little things like doing your laundry tidying up the kitchen because, you know, you don't like a messy place or like having clutter everywhere makes your mind go fucking crazy. Like I'm like somewhat in the middle between the two. Like I like organization and clean, but then I know I can also operate in a fucking mess, which amazing. But, you know, like just little things is also in the little things that I want you to pay attention to when it comes to your energetic process. So the other day, of like backstory, I have been working on just gaining more clarity in my sole purpose business, which is this, you know, the podcast, my personal brand, really helping women. step more into their feminine embodiment feminine leadership and really just sharing all of my gifts my knowledge what i'm passionate about into the world and so this is something that's really important for me and i also at the same time have been in the process of getting a read from my friend and you know the whole situation that was like a whole task in itself and you would think like
00:15:17
Speaker
A task that I had for my sole purpose business, whatever, is a big task, right? It's a very important, logically, I think it's very important task, right? Because it's moving the needle in my business, it's growing my business, right? And then the other task that I had to do that was open in my mind that I knew I had to do as a priority for me was getting back to my friend who did an intuitive read for me. And it was all around me gaining clarity for the direction of my soul pool. Like what actions do I need to take and all of that stuff. Right. And like what, like also like it's, there's like a job situation in there too, to like help increase and support income and like just support my life in the way that I wanted to, is I have a little bit of a standard here, y'all like we are only going to upgrade and we are not downgrading. So
00:16:03
Speaker
Anyways, a lot of stuff in there. Don't need to go into details. But I had this read and I was like, I was supposed to send follow up questions. So that was my task is like going over it again, sitting with the info and then sending over my questions to her so that we can gain even more clarity. Right. So logically, you would think that that task is ah a small task. It's not much of a priority. And then the task for my business that I was supposed to do is going to be like the main priority.
00:16:30
Speaker
No, bitch. When moment I fucking woke up, obviously, I have like my little morning routine, I do my thing. And that's like a boundary that I created for myself. But after i was paying attention to my mind, is it's very important to be aware, like awareness is so fucking powerful.
00:16:45
Speaker
While I was showering, I was thinking about it. It was really taking up a lot of space in my mind. And it was just like, even though I knew that that was going to be later on the day, like I need to prep myself for the first task of the day, it was still in my mind. And I was just like, you know what?
00:17:00
Speaker
Why not be flexible with my structure that I have for the day, right? It's still going to get done. I'm going to be flexible with my my structure. And I'm going to do this today first.
00:17:12
Speaker
Like I'm going to sit down and handle this like you know, question read thing first because it's taking up a lot of space in my mind right now. And then i will readjust and flip over, you know, readjust my schedule and do the other business task thing later.
00:17:30
Speaker
And when I tell you, man, when I did it that way and I allowed myself to be flexible in just the order of the tasks that I do and like readjusting my schedule, even though I had it set the way that it was,
00:17:42
Speaker
I received so much mental space and clarity. Like my energy, I literally felt like a relief in my body. i was just like, oh i wish it felt so good.
00:17:53
Speaker
And so this is an example of energetic ROI is what I'm
Building Momentum Through Action
00:17:58
Speaker
talking about. This is an example of like, wow, like logically you wouldn't have thought that of like how that would be like more of a priority than other, but energetically it really, expanded my energy, my space more to be able to increase my capacity to do more than I ever even thought I would do. And I did. like I ended up doing other things because I had the energy to. A lot of people also tend to avoid the harder task first, right? This is also another thing. They tend to avoid the harder task first and then do the easy stuff first. But what is going to give you the most momentum is actually doing the harder things, right?
00:18:37
Speaker
you perceive it as being hard if you just change your perception it wouldn't be hard for you but they if you see like the hard things as a fun challenge i always do that and it helps me all the time like a fun challenge like let's see what we can do with this like that and focusing on the pleasure of how you're gonna feel after doing it that will get you through that painful task i'm using quotations if you're watching me in video quote unquote sarcastic voice task versus doing the easy stuff first. This is going to give you words.
00:19:11
Speaker
It's going to give you momentum. It's going to give you momentum from doing the harder things first and then getting to the easier things. You actually get more shit done. Another tip that helps you close more of those mental tabs that you have going on in your brain is to stop telling yourself that I'm going to do it later I was the motherfucking queen of this. Like, there's a part of me that like likes to get shit done and there's that hyper-vigilant part of me that i'm you know I've been working on just shifting a lot with. But then there's also a part of me that was like, if I don't feel like doing it, I'll just do it later, right? How many times have we fucking done that? Or it's like tidying up the kitchen, for example, or you know cleaning up the bathroom, or doing the dishes, or... Um, you know, my dad has like an electric car thing. So it's like charging the car, going out to charge the car so that the next day i have fucking battery. so i don't have to, you know, fill up gas, like tiny little things, folding the clothes, doing the laundry, right. Getting that going. How many times do we tell ourselves that we're going to do that later? And that it's just, we think that it's going to take so much more time than it actually is. I fucking challenge you to time yourself when you do these things, time yourself of like how long,
00:20:26
Speaker
set up a timer and be like, how long does it actually take me to do this? Because the other day, like I was super fucking tired, but I knew that I had to clean the kitchen and I was like, oh, maybe I can just do it tomorrow. Like it's not like a big task, right?
00:20:39
Speaker
But I was like, no, we need to do this to like right now because tomorrow I'm going to feel so much better with a clean kitchen that I don't have to think about with all these other things that I have going on. I'm going to it right now. And it literally took me 10 minutes to clean it up, like tidy up the kitchen. So where can we stop telling ourselves that I will do it later? And the moment that we feel like, you know, oh i like I need to get this done, just fucking do it. You know, like obviously if you're able to like, you know, whatever, which most the time we are at home, at least this is very applicable. Just do it. Even like with text messaging, for example, right?
00:21:16
Speaker
So a lot of times we even keep mental tabs open with text messages and Because we, and especially this applies if you like read the text message too. Like how many times have you opened up a text, read it, and then you're like, I'll get back to her later, right? That is an open mental tab that you've kept open because now you need to remind yourself to remember to get back to that person versus just literally replying then and there. And like, even for example, if you don't have the energy to like respond to the whole thing, communication, bitch, just let them know.
00:21:47
Speaker
Hey, like, You know, I haven't fully responded, like read this fully, processed it fully. I will get back to you in a couple of days. If I don't, just text me to remind me because whatever, right? Just just get back to the fucking text message and close that mental tab.
00:22:03
Speaker
Close these extra reminders that you create for yourself for tiny little things because those tiny little things add up and then they cause more stress, more overwhelm, all of that stuff versus you just doing the thing right away. I have been like literally training myself lately that the moment I have an idea and I'm able to actually execute it, like literally I do it right away.
00:22:24
Speaker
Like I have the energy capacity, like even if I don't have the energy capacity, because I didn't fucking feel like tidying up the kitchen. i was like, but I know the ah ROI of this, the energetic ah ROI of this.
00:22:35
Speaker
If I do it right now, I'm going to do it right now, period. No fucking questions asked in my brain. And the moment I do it, I really do feel that expansion in my en energy. And I'm like, yes. but Something else that you can also do is habit stacking. This is very quite popular and if you haven't heard of it, it's basically the ability to do like two tasks at one time and being able to to like kill two birds, two stones, two birds at the same, whatever that fucking phrase is So for example, like,
00:23:06
Speaker
For me, i when I do like my morning walks, I also do my like energetic um beliefs that I'm programming in. So I'll do that at the same time. um Also, like if I'm you know cleaning up the fucking kitchen, I'll listen to a podcast at the same time as I wanted to. um Just like being able to could like combine two tasks together at the same time. that will really allow you to free up more space and time as well. Obviously, you can't like technically do it for everything. like It doesn't make sense for you to do it for everything because you also don't want to... like
00:23:39
Speaker
Catch yourself from not being present. You know what i mean? Like I feel like there's a fine line with this because I feel like trying to do it with everything and trying to optimize your time. Sometimes people end up losing that presence and stillness and just the the beingness of everything
Understanding Personal Capacity and Cycles
00:23:55
Speaker
that they do. So just be discerning of that user discernment. But you know where you can kind of optimize things together. For me, it's usually like like whenever I'm listening to content, hence why we have podcasts.
00:24:07
Speaker
um or when i'm like you know like i said i'm doing like my and like um emotional like belief stuff that i'm integrating in my energy field then i'm also like walking outside and doing that at the same time um just little things like that really helps and goes a long way just like little little bit of ass piece that i want to share with you guys around like helping you cultivate more like feminine inspired systems for yourself, structures, habits, routine, is knowing your capacity. This is also something very important that I want you to remember is knowing your capacity. So well knowing your capacity for what energy, what space you have to hold all the things that you're doing in your life, whether it's the next week, the next day, the next month, like knowing what season you are in in your life right now. And I think this is so important because society has programmed us to keep going and keep going and keep bringing that momentum in our lives. But we are cyclical beings like we are women. We have cycles. We have seasons. We have different, you know, things going on in our life, different phases, different versions of ourselves. And so we need to remember that and honor that versus like looking outside of us. And I've done this so many fucking times until I really realized that like, no, I need to honor the season that I am in right in life right now and how it's perfect. Right. Because
00:25:25
Speaker
We all have different things going on in our life. We all have different obligations, different responsibilities. And so knowing like, for example, when I went out for my birthday, like the whole week that I took off, I technically didn't really personally, to be real honest, I didn't really intend anything. I was just like, I'm going to take that week off to energetically fill my cup up and to really give myself that space and time that I have been needing because I've been on it for so long. And I also told myself, like, you know, even though like I don't it my so obviously my time when you're traveling, it's very, ah quote unquote, limited in a way because you don't know what's going to happen. There's a lot of time that gets it kind of like between travel and like plans and all of that stuff. Right. With other people. And so for me, i was like, well, it would be nice if I just get some content. And that was in the back of my mind at the very least. Right. And that was my capacity. Like, that's what I knew that I was going to be able to do and everything else is fine right so when we set ourselves up for success in that way by knowing our capacity and then creating intentions and plans for that literally i got amazing fucking content which i'll be i'm probably sure by the time this podcast comes out you guys will see some of like my birthday photos and all of that stuff definitely check it out because your girl was like glammed up but a lot of fun um
00:26:49
Speaker
But yeah, like know your capacity, right? knew what my capacity was and so I was not beating myself up about it by being off of my, I'm doing quotations again, being off of my routine, right? My normal routine because I set myself up for success. I knew what my capacity was for that season, which was like a week for that period of time for myself. wanna talk about is scheduling.
00:27:13
Speaker
So the way that I do it that I wanted to share that I learned and then I kind of like was doing my own thing was every Sunday you can pick any day out of the week for me Sundays are very like nourishing days it's like my literally like it's my fuck off days where I will throw my phone away I'll literally allow myself to do what the fuck I want and I really love it like It's just all about me day. So Sundays though, I did like did tell myself that, okay, this is what at least I can do for myself, even though it's like a me day.
00:27:44
Speaker
Because it is. like All of these things that we are doing for ourselves is setting ourselves up for success and it is a form of self-love. Because you're giving yourself what you need and that is what self-love is. You're putting yourself first. That is the ultimate definition of self-love, okay? So...
00:28:01
Speaker
Um, what I did is every Sunday I, and this is my way of doing it is I'm creating this, the schedule for the week and I'm already doing it so that I don't have to think about like the day of like, what do I need to do today? Or what are, you know, some people do it like in the morning, they'll write down like three tasks for the day.
00:28:18
Speaker
I'm already even just preparing myself beforehand because it helps me just step into the day with confidence and clarity. So that's what I do. And the way I did it was i Literally, like you know when you have so many mental tasks in your head of like, oh, I got to do this and I got to do that and I know I got to do that, like so many things, I put it down on fucking paper. like Get it out of your brain. Put it down on a piece of paper. i did it on my my iPhone notes, so I'll just weak of whatever, right?
00:28:46
Speaker
and then write down all the tasks that you have, then you're able to fucking look at them and be like, oh, okay, amazing. Then I was choosing like my biggest priority tasks of like, these are like non-negotiable, got to get done. And then I started plugging them into my schedule for the day. And something that I kind of like made up a rule for myself is that,
00:29:04
Speaker
I usually don't do no more than three big tasks for the day. um and I allow myself extra space in between these tasks and extra time so that if anything happens, I'm not rushing myself to get the thing done. I'm not like feeling like I'm behind right in time and like rushing and being in that kind of like fight or flight energy um stress state.
00:29:26
Speaker
Because what we tend to do is we tend to over stack thinking that we can do it all and whatever over stack and underestimate the time that can occur and give ourselves that space to really move through each and every task with presence, with grace. And so that's kind of like a rule that I set for myself. Some days I do have the capacity to hold more, but I allow myself to keep that minimum for myself.
00:29:51
Speaker
By having that minimum, by the way, guys, like side note, having minimums has changed the fucking game for me. And I want to add that in here is that having minimums that make it easy for you, that are easy for you to attain and commit to is going to help you so much more and getting more shit done, but then also not beating yourself up. around not getting the things done that you wanted to and then making you not as motivated. So create minimums for yourself. It's OK to surpass your minimums because that's the kind of the point indirectly of minimums is that you're able to and that's what kind of psychologically happens. But it's not always the goal. Like sometimes I'm literally like, no, this is my minimum and that's it.
00:30:29
Speaker
So know your capacity and what you are able to actually commit to. Be honest with yourself and just fucking create that schedule for yourself by getting everything written out on your iPhone notes or a piece of paper and then start plugging it in.
Transitioning from Work to Personal Life
00:30:44
Speaker
Also something that um I also do is like everyday like daily check-ins and it's like a five minute thing. By the end of my workday, I will look at the next day And I will be like, okay, what are the things I got done today? Great. Got everything done? Great.
00:30:58
Speaker
Tomorrow looks good. Is there anything I want to add on or is there anything I want to change for whatever? Great. Just like a scanning check-in. And this is right before you your end of your workday, not the end of the fucking night or whatever. You want to keep that energy as part of your workday. And then once you finish your workday, when you check out, you want to transition into your feminine. You want to transition into your personal life, your feminine flow. You don't want to like a lot of women did this. And I especially if you're a business owner, a lot of women do this and tend to do this is bring their masculine energy into their personal life. And they're still high, like they're still
00:31:36
Speaker
like, you know, in their masculine energy. And so you want to create that transition period and that transition for yourself. And that's why by closing all those mental tasks that you have for yourself, knowing what you're going to do the next day, feeling that grounded, secure and confident uh niss i was gonna say that's not at work but whatever feeling that creating that structure for yourself is going to help you thrive in your feminine and be able to be like relaxed and safe and secure because you already did that for yourself you created that for yourself already you planned in advance and again while having that flexibility But you prepared and you're done like you don't need to think about it I feel like sometimes we think that little things like this take so much time, but they actually save you so much time so please do not underestimate the value of implementing these tiny little tricks and hacks into your life to help support you in achieving your dream life and your goals The very last thing that I want to end this podcast episode with to give you guys is something that really, really ripped me open when I learned
Proactive Living and Stress Reduction
00:32:42
Speaker
about this. And I was like noticing how I was doing it in my life and then noticing how I wasn't doing it.
00:32:49
Speaker
and just the difference between the two, but it's really the essence in this idea of being more proactive in your life versus waiting till last minute or versus like the whole phrase that women say of like, oh, like I operate best under pressure. I'm also doing quotations again, like operating so great under well under pressure, right?
00:33:12
Speaker
Technically operating great or well under pressure is an addiction. It's more of an addiction. it's It's a trauma response in the form of being addicted to stress.
00:33:23
Speaker
And so, yes, this may be triggering to hear because you're like, what do you mean? Like I do do great under pressure, like make the best fucking decisions. Well, What if, though, what if there was a better way? And what if there was a way where you could make the best decisions from a proactive state?
00:33:40
Speaker
So being able to give yourself that space, right, again, with that space and energy. energy to be able to make more aligned decisions, not from that place of stress, not from that place of like, I have no choice, because I've hit rock bottom, right? A lot of people wait until they hit rock bottom, because they don't have a choice anymore. Because only from there, the choice is only the one thing, the one decision that they can make, right?
00:34:05
Speaker
And that is technically from a fight or flight response from a stress response, right from a stressful way, like you're Technically, you have no choice at that point. But what if you didn't allow yourself to get there? I was talking to my friend about this other day and I was you know telling her um like about my money situation. In full transparency, guys, like it's I've worked on my money stuff for a while and I know there's always new levels to everything and there's also like more that I want to work with and cultivating a secure relationship, a secure attachment with money. But I'm definitely way more better now than I ever was before. And I was just telling her like, you know, it's great that I have money in the bank and I have like a I call it an opportunity fund. People call it savings. I call it opportunity fund.
00:34:50
Speaker
um language for another day. And I was just like, you know, I'm not going to take it for granted, though. I'm going to be proactive with my money and the way that I, you know, grow my money by not waiting until like I hit rock bottom where I only have like $2,000 left or $1,000 left or $500, whatever the amount is for you. um I have a different baseline for money. Like my, no matter if I ever hit this number, then like I got to do some shit. Right. But it's like, why am I going to wait or like put myself in that situation to be able to motivate myself to
00:35:26
Speaker
grow and like do things right so just want you to sit with that and think about that energy in the essence of like you know i can allow things to still be good and still be motivated from things being good already be allow things to be good and still be motivated to grow to expand to let things be even better versus waiting until last minute um to you know have no choice so like even in small simple ways The way that I've been like even implementing this besides money is like, for example, if you're going to buy deodorant, buy a couple, save yourself that time and be proactive versus waiting last minute and then holding off on it and then just being behind, creating more mental tabs in your fucking mind, being behind on the things that you know you need to do. Be proactive. And so as something I just started doing, you know, ah more of and I was doing before, it but I'm doing more of it now intentionally of like, regardless if there's a sale or not, you know, we love a great fucking deal. But if if there's a sale or not, I'm just like, why not just get one extra thing of it and get a duplicate of it?
00:36:31
Speaker
um like a quick little hack and tip. If you're traveling, get a fucking duplicate of the thing that you usually use anyways, the travel size, because then you can just leave it in your fucking bag. And so you don't have to like take it out, think about it. Even like creating ah something to reduce like more of that mental stress and whatever is creating a list of like all the essentials that you need for your travel,
00:36:55
Speaker
And knowing that no matter what, these are the things that I take with me. And so then when you're traveling, you just go through that list and then you decide, okay, do I want this or not? It's just being more structured and organized in a way that really allows your feminine to thrive. And it's little, like these simple things, they're so simple and they're so easy to implement. It's just that we don't take the time and prioritize to implement them and integrate them. But this is your motherfucking permission for me,
Implementing Small Changes for Better Systems
00:37:21
Speaker
bitch. Like this is your sign, this is your permission to start, like I said from the beginning of this podcast episode, implement one little thing at a time.
00:37:30
Speaker
Okay, first be aware, take inventory, and then implement one thing that stood out to you and fucking implement it until you actually do it and you're like, I got this and then implement the next thing because I don't want to overwhelm you. However, if you know your capacity and you know that I can handle more than one thing in implementing, go ahead because you know yourself more than I do, more than anybody else.
00:37:53
Speaker
So that's everything that I have for you guys. I fucking said a lot. I want you to re-listen to this podcast episode a few times because your brain only retains around 20 or 30% information at a time. So re-listen to this a couple of times. Take notes. I want you guys to really, it's more about implementing. Like I would rather you like implement one little thing than re-listen, re-listen and not do anything with the info because that's how you actually change your life.
00:38:22
Speaker
So I hope this is really helpful. I know it has been for me, so I know it will be for you. please hit me up on Instagram again my Instagram is darshvibes d-a-r-s-h-v-i-b-e-s-s hit me up girl let's connect let me know what you took away let me know how the implementation goes so if you have any topic requests like things that you want me to talk about let me know because I'm always open I'm very open mind very open spirit And I will do my best to make that happen for you guys. Also, just wanted to announce that um I will be creating like a email newsletter for everybody that wants to be more intimate with me, that wants to be more in my world. And so um that is going to be coming up soon. I don't know when I'm launching it, maybe next week or the week after. um It'll be available for you guys to sign up for. And it's really just a space where I share exclusive content beyond what I share on the podcast. So like just a little bit more of the BTS behind the scenes with me. I'm a little bit more intimate with me. um
00:39:27
Speaker
It's just another way for me to connect with you guys and my thoughts and my ideas and like everything that I have learned up until now. It's another way for me to share that with you guys through written form. And also you guys will know as well when I have any upcoming offers and upgrades and anything. available for you guys to work with me for. That's the place that you'll know. And I also just want to make it a place where it's literally, it's not going to be um like i some of the things that I share in the emails is not going to be available, you know, and my Instagram, TikTok, like,
00:40:02
Speaker
I want it to be very like an exclusive place where it's just you and i we're having a conversation. We're besties, like we're intimate with each other, like we're connecting with each other. That's what I want the email place to be. So like I know everybody is always bombarded with emails all day.
00:40:19
Speaker
all the fucking time. My goal is I'm very intentional with everything I do. So my goal is like anytime that you receive an email from me, it is more like a heart to heart conversation that we're having. It's more of an invitation to, you know, strengthen more of your relationship with yourself and our relationship together in this journey. um It's really just to create that community and connection. And so that's really what my intention is. um So just know it's not going to be like crazy, like I haven't figured out how often I'm going to be sending out these emails.
00:40:54
Speaker
I just wanted to create another space for us to connect and really allow you to be able to connect with me on a deeper level in another way.
Community Engagement and Newsletter Launch
00:41:03
Speaker
um But it's definitely going to be more of an exclusive place. So if you do want to stay connected and you want to know like what what's coming up, um any offers, like you'll be the first to know. And, you know, you also want more exclusive content behind the scenes that I probably won't really be sharing elsewhere, then that is the place for you. And there's a lot of gems that I will be dropping. um
00:41:26
Speaker
My intention is to really help support you and just becoming your most magnetic, confident and most dreamiest self. Like it all starts with you and really coming back home to yourself and your authentic nature and helping you create your dream life as well. so ah Stay tuned for that. But thank you so much for tuning in. So grateful that you're here. and i will catch you guys in the next episode. Oh, be sure to subscribe so you don't miss when an episode drops. And also, leave me a five-star review. i love when I receive reviews. And...
00:42:04
Speaker
It also helps the podcast get out to other women. That would be a match for this podcast and to learn and grow along like everybody learning and growing together. but yeah, thank you for tuning in and I will catch you guys in the next episode. bye