Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable.
Speaker: I'm Michelle Madrid, and in each episode, I'll be sitting down with guests who have dared to unlock their hidden truths, unburden themselves from life's toughest challenges, and step into their power as the hero of their own stories.
Speaker: I hope these conversations will inspire you unbox your own journey, find your strength, and embrace the unstoppable within.
Speaker: So, let's dive in.
Speaker: Hi there, friends. I want to welcome you to this episode of Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable. I'm Michelle Madrid. I'm so glad you are here with me today because today we're doing what they call a solo episode.
Speaker: This conversation is between you and me. And if you're tuning in today and Maybe like me, you're feeling a little raw or you're feeling a little lost or a little lonely. I want you to know you're in the right place.
Speaker: I get the tingles when I share that with you because i I want to share something of my own personal story that happened just this morning and it's something that caught me off guard.
Speaker: Okay, here we go. I was standing in the shower and I was washing my hair. ah Just trying to wrap my brain around the fact that my daughter's freshman year of high school officially ends today. And there are a host of different closing ceremonies going on today, the last of which will be this evening at six o'clock when we go to her spring athletics ah closing ceremony and awards ceremony. And I was just taking it all in.
Speaker: And as I stood there in the shower, I just tilted my face into the water. And i whispered the words that honestly, in that moment, I didn't want to say out loud.
Speaker: And the words were, oh my God, in three years, she'll be gone. She'll be leaving the nest. She'll be stepping into her next chapter of life.
Speaker: And in that moment, I felt it standing right there in the shower. I felt that deep gut-wrenching ache. And the thought came to me that there is no grip tight enough to stop the passing of time.
Speaker: As much as we wish we could as parents, we don't hold that superpower. And so I stood there and I cried and I cried right there in the shower. My arms were, you know, wrapped around myself, giving myself a hug.
Speaker: while images of my girl's life were flashing through my mind from her toddler giggles to her teenage independence and everything in between.
Speaker: And then came that flooding of thoughts and the thoughts were, am I the only one who feels this loneliness?
Speaker: Am I the only one? Why do I feel so invisible in this moment? My daughter's in the next room. Why do I still feel such loss?
Speaker: Who will I be outside of motherhood when everyone's grown and when everyone has flown the nest? Who will I be outside of my role as mother? And, you know, is it too late to begin again?
Speaker: Does that even exist?
Speaker: And maybe you've thought about those things too. Maybe one of those thoughts feels boxed up in your body right now.
Speaker: You know, i I know I'm not alone in this. Just yesterday, i sat down with a woman I'd never met before. We sat down um over coffee and we were sitting across from the ocean in Corona Del Mar, California, where we live and I was looking into her eyes and you know, I thought to myself, this is a very thoughtful human being. She is very, um, empathetic. She holds a lot of empathy for the world around her.
Speaker: Um, and she's insightful, but I don't think that she has connected with the power of her insight as of yet. Those were my initial thoughts as we um sort of leaned into conversation together. And this woman is a midlife mother whose son is 19 years old and has recently moved out of the house.
Speaker: And he's exploring his world and his new chapter of adulthood. And as we sat there sipping on coffee,
Speaker: She told me that lately, since her son has moved out, the quietness in her home has become deafening and that her arms ache for something to hold.
Speaker: So much so that she's trying to get her husband to agree to getting a puppy. And she also shared that she's been waking up with this lump in her throat that doesn't seem to go away.
Speaker: And most of all, she said, i feel lonely. i feel really, really lonely. And she started to cry and, you know, in the midst of her tears, she said, I'm afraid that maybe this is just how it's going to be now.
Speaker: I'm afraid that maybe I'll never find meaningful friendships again. It's so hard to find those female friends anymore. And she said, I'm afraid that I'll never feel that sense of belonging again in my life. I'm afraid that I'll never have clarity of meaning in my life again.
Speaker: And my heart just broke for her. because i've been there too i've been there and i continue to dip into these moments of feeling the loneliness the loss and the grief as midlife women as mothers who are empty nesting approaching empty nesting or perhaps have been empty nesting for a while i heard from a mother oh couple of weeks ago who reached out. She lives in Europe and her son is in his twenties. He lives in another country.
Speaker: They met for a weekend, um, mother son reunion. And she said when he was leaving to fly back to where he lives now, she said, the grief that I felt hit me out of nowhere. And it was a grief that felt stronger than when he initially left the nest.
Speaker: when he graduated from high school, the grief and has been so um recurring. Even though we live in separate places and I'm more used to this flow, when we come together and have those moments of connection, saying goodbye feels devastating.
Speaker: And she said, I feel lonely.
Speaker: And I think that as I hear more and more from midlife women, from mothers in this season of life, we we share these emotions. There's a common thread that pulls us closer together when we are able to sit together and talk about these things that we feel like we might be experiencing all by ourself. But when we open ourself up to sharing vulnerably real and raw, we find out we're not alone. And I think that's a very powerful thing.
Speaker: Because truth be told, we spend decades showing up for everyone else. And we do that lovingly, willingly, happily. But then the moment comes when life begins to shift and kids are growing and they fly off on their own. And we are left asking, where did I go?
Speaker: Where did I go? Who am I now? And what am I here for? What is my purpose outside of the caregiving and the showing up for everyone else.
Speaker: So all of that being said, I want you to know that this episode today is for the woman who is carrying that ache. And I want you to know I am here with you because I feel that ache very strong on this day.
Speaker: The woman who longs to be seen, but at the same time is afraid of being fully known. I don't know if that resonates with you, but it does resonate with me.
Speaker: Yes. And it resonates with so many women I speak i speak to. And this episode is for the woman who's been so strong for so long that she's forgotten how to ask for softness.
Speaker: Perhaps she's convinced herself that softness is weakness. It's not. It's a strength.
Speaker: And here's the paradox of protection that I have learned over the years. We build walls in order to stay safe. We see these walls as a protection mechanism.
Speaker: But those same walls that we build to stay safe actually become the thing that isolates us. And that knowing begins to crash into our consciousness as midlife women.
Speaker: We may armor up with busyness. We may armor up with competence. We may armor up with being needed. But that day will come when we are standing there alone, perhaps in the shower like I was this morning, and I'm standing, we're standing behind that armor and wondering, is this all that there is?
Speaker: But I wanna tell you something that I've learned, and honestly, it's something that I'm still learning. Loneliness, is not a flaw in you. And I have to remind myself that loneliness is not a flaw in me either.
Speaker: Loneliness is not a flaw. It's actually a signal. It's a sacred signal. It's the soul's invitation to come back home to ourselves as women in this in this remarkable chapter of midlife.
Speaker: It's the invitation to unbox the parts of yourself that you silenced in order to survive. The invitation to soften into the grief that you have been carrying. The invitation to step out of performance and into presence.
Speaker: And here's what I want every woman in midlife to hear. You're not alone. You are not alone.
Speaker: You are not the only one wondering what you're here for. You're not the only one who feels invisible even while doing everything for everyone. You're not the only one holding unspoken grief for the life that used to be.
Speaker: And you're not the only one who feels the ache of loneliness, maybe even when you're standing in a crowd of people. You're not alone.
Speaker: And feeling that loneliness is not weakness. Actually, if we look at loneliness as an invitation, we understand that these feelings that we're having, whether it's loneliness or grief or invisibility, these boxes that are rattling inside of us as as midlife women, we understand this is actually a crossroads.
Speaker: None of this is weakness. It is a crossroads for us. And this right here in this moment, this conversation inside of this episode is where your breakthrough can begin.
Speaker: also want to share with you that i created this podcast to be a place where together we can name what we're carrying. Because just like in my conversation yesterday with the woman over coffee, when we're able to begin identifying and naming these boxes inside of us, these these parts of ourselves that we've stored away, these emotions that we are suppressing, when we begin to name them, it is freeing.
Speaker: Because when we name it, we do free it. When we name the box, the box loses power over us. We take back our power. And you can see it in the women that I coach.
Speaker: You can see the shift in their energy, in their body language, the light in their eyes. And as I've done the work over the years of unboxing those places inside of myself, I see it when I look in the mirror.
Speaker: It's liberating. It's transformative. When we name the box, we stop being so damn alone in our lives. When we name the box, we stop being so damn alone in our pain.
Speaker: There's a powerful connection that starts to happen. Because I want more for you than quiet suffering.
Speaker: I want more for you than that. I want more for me than that. I want sisterhood. I want safety.
Speaker: I want spaces where we as midlife women take off the mask, not just for a moment, but for good. When we take those masks off and and understand the heavy weight of carrying those things and we finally put them down and free ourself forward.
Speaker: Because this next chapter of your life that so many call midlife, this chapter of midlife is not meant to be endured.
Speaker: It is meant to be reclaimed.
Speaker: And I am a firm believer that when we do that collectively,
Speaker: transformation happens. when we come together and we understand and see in real time that we are understood and that there are others going through the same thing as we're going through, we're not alone. if that's when
Speaker: life altering shifts happen. That's when breakthrough happens. And so, Having said this, I want you to know that coming up this fall, I am launching something very, very close to my heart and something that I've been thinking about for a while. And I've been sitting with, meditating on, visualizing, praying on.
Speaker: And it is a group coaching experience for midlife women. And I'm calling it Unboxed, the Midlife Breakthrough Circle. This will be an intimate group coaching experience for Women like you, like me, who are empty nesting or on the edge of it.
Speaker: Women who are ready to unbox the layers of loneliness, the layers of grief, of shame, of self-doubt, that feeling of invisibility in our own lives. And and women who are ready to reclaim what has been buried, packed away, put on pause.
Speaker: Because your truth matters. At the end of the day, If you take nothing else away from this episode, please understand and hear me when I say your truth matters and your story matters.
Speaker: Every second of your story matters. And you don't have to walk this path alone. Quite honestly, I don't know what I'd do without each and every one of you joining me on this journey
Speaker: of becoming more of who we're here to be and returning to the women we've always been. But parts of ourselves have been boxed away, stored away in the serving of others, in the doing of what we have been called to do, but we're ready to step into the being.
Speaker: the being of who we are and to rest into that, soften into that, lean into that.
Speaker: And so if you're interested in this group coaching experience coming up in the fall of 2025, you're going to find the link and more information in my show notes to learn more and get on the wait list because I really want to see you there.
Speaker: And as I close out my thoughts, because I am heading out to closing ceremonies for my daughter, um i just want you to know that
Speaker: if you feel um something inside of yourself that is pulling you into this unboxing experience,
Speaker: i I want to encourage you not to ignore it. Those are signs, those are signals. And sometimes we um want to move past those signs and signals, but they're asking of us to go deep, to stop, to listen to what we need as women.
Speaker: And maybe what you will hear when you stop and you sit in the gentleness of stillness is that calling for more that calling to begin unpaing unboxing these places within yourself and to do so with other women.
Speaker: If so, please join the wait list, reach out to me with any questions. You can DM me on Instagram. You can reply to the newsletters. I hope you are subscribed, um, on my email list because we sent out weekly. I, I write you weekly things that are on my heart and experiences that I am having as a midlife woman and mother.
Speaker: And so what I'm going to be thinking about over the course of the next few days as i celebrate my daughter today and as we prepare for summer and all of the excitement of um a little more space to be a family, um a little less rush and a little more time together,
Speaker: um i I would love for you to journal on a couple of questions. And these are questions that I'm going to be journaling on too. And the first one is what's something that you've been carrying alone?
Speaker: I'm going to be journaling on that. Take some time, pull out pen and paper and ask yourself, what have I been carrying alone lately? What have been telling myself I have to carry all by myself?
Speaker: something that's weighing me down and I'm ready to set it down. What is that thing? And then what's a truth that you're ready to unbox?
Speaker: I mean, i feel so much better having shared my moment in the shower today with you because I feel like I've unboxed that place of loneliness and I've reminded myself as a mother with a daughter who is three years short of graduating from from high school and moving on to her college chapter. And I know how far or how quickly that is, how quickly this freshman year has gone by. i can only imagine how quickly the next three years will go by.
Speaker: But it helps me to name what I was feeling today in the shower. And the thoughts and the emotions that came over me. I feel a lot more powerful having done that work and to do it in front of you and your willingness to bear witness to that and to hear me means everything. And I i want you to know that I'm here to bear witness to what you're going through and to hear you.
Speaker: I always say life coaching is a partnership and it's a beautiful one. It's an empowering one. It's a freeing one when we can show up real raw. in front of each other and share and gain that insight from each other.
Speaker: So questions, what's something you've been carrying alone? What's a truth you're ready to unbox? Reach out to me, let me know, share with me or schedule a free call with me. You can find more information about that on my website.
Speaker: But I want you to know that when we come together, when you make that decision, whether it's signing up for a free call, signing up for one-on-one coaching, getting on the wait list for the fall 2025 group coaching, unbox the midlife breakthrough circle, um whether you commit to reading my newsletters weekly, listening to the podcast, what I want you to know is nothing I do in the work I do with women is about fixing you because you're not broken.
Speaker: This is about witnessing you. This is about guiding you and helping you reconnect to the woman you've put on pause in the midst of caregiving and giving and surviving, sacrificing.
Speaker: And together we can name what's hurting. We can unbox what's been silenced and we can begin reclaiming what is next. because you deserve to feel seen, supported, and strong in this chapter of midlife.
Speaker: And I am here to walk that road with you. So thank you so much for joining me on this episode of Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable.
Speaker: Remember, you are not broken. You are becoming. And I am right here beside you. Until next time.
Speaker: Thank you for joining me on Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable. If today's story unboxed something within you, share this with a friend. Subscribe and commit to walking this path of power and purpose with us.
Speaker: Remember, you have everything it takes to be the hero of your own life. Until next time, stay unboxed, unburdened, and unstoppable.
