Transcript
Speaker: Welcome to Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable. I'm your host, Michelle Madrid, and if you're navigating the grief of midlife, feeling the weight of fading identities, shifting roles, and the lives you've outgrown, this is the place for you.
Speaker: In this space, we honor who we've been, we've sacrificed, and what we've tucked away while preparing our kids to leave the nest. Together we'll unbox the limiting beliefs, outdated expectations, and old identities that no longer serve you so that you can reclaim your voice, your power, and step boldly into this next chapter of your life.
Speaker: Are you ready? Before we dive I want to share a tool that has absolutely changed my life. My daily check-in. It's a five-step practice I use every morning to reconnect with myself, ground in how I'm feeling, and take one small aligned step forward.
Speaker: Now, it takes only 10 minutes a day and it's become a non-negotiable part of my routine. This is one of the best first things you can do to start familiarizing yourself with some of the boxes you've hidden away that are holding you back.
Speaker: You can download it for free at themichellemadrid.com slash daily. That's themichellemadrid.com slash daily or click the links in the show notes.
Speaker: All right, box breakers, let's get into today's episode.
Speaker: Hi friends, I'm Michelle Madrid. Welcome to Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable. This is our space. This is a space for midlife women and empty nesters to gather and to get real.
Speaker: Because let's be honest, we need a space that tells the truth. We do. And the truth is, this chapter of life, well, it's layered, it's emotional, and it's full of questions like,
Speaker: Who am I now that my role has shifted? am I now? Where do I fit in now that the rhythm of my home has changed? And what's left for me?
Speaker: We're so often in this season of life grieving what was and questioning what is and quietly hoping that something beautiful is still possible.
Speaker: And so this space is where we give voice to all of that, all of it. It's where we open up the boxes that have kept us quiet, that have told us to stay small in our lives, to keep the peace and to meet everyone else's needs before we meet our own.
Speaker: And it's also where we explore what happens when we stop doing that, when we unbox and when we begin again on purpose with intention and in alignment with who we really are.
Speaker: So I want you to do something with me right now. Just take a moment, connect to your breath, take a deep breath in and say this out loud. This is my space, my time, my moment.
Speaker: And say that again, if you'd like, and let it drop from your head down into your body because claiming this moment matters and you matter. And you've probably spent a lot of time putting yourself last on your own list.
Speaker: So just take another breath, put your hands over your heart and say, I matter too. Let that land, let it settle. I matter too.
Speaker: Now, if you tuned into the last episode, you know, we talked about the ache of midlife and the grief that creeps in when your identity starts to shift, when the noise fades, when the calendar empties and when the question isn't what's for dinner, but what now?
Speaker: And we also talked about the boxes that we've lived in, the ones labeled, be the good girl, don't rock the boat, be selfless, keep smiling, even when you're breaking.
Speaker: Boxes that made us believe we were only lovable when we were sacrificing. Maybe made us believe we were only worthy when we were disappearing into the roles that we played.
Speaker: But today, I want to talk about what happens on the other side of that. What happens when you stop believing that your value lives in your ability to perform, to produce, please?
Speaker: What happens then? What happens when you unbox?
Speaker: Because the truth is, on the other side of unboxing isn't just healing, although healing is a beautiful thing. What's on the other side of boxing is also more you, more clarity, more creativity, more joy, more grounded, soul honest, take up space, you.
Speaker: So here's what I want you to do. and want you to close your eyes. Don't close your eyes if you're driving, but you can still do this exercise along with me. I want you to imagine her, that version of you.
Speaker: The one who knows what she wants. The version of you who feels steady in her skin. The version who trusts her gut. Who no longer asks for permission to be here.
Speaker: Can you see her? What does she look like? Can you feel her? What does that feel like? The woman who lives on the other side of unboxing.
Speaker: She's there. Now let's do a little coaching. because visualization is actualization. Say this with me, to visualize helps me to actualize.
Speaker: So when you visualize the woman you want to become, your brain begins to pave the pathway forward. You're not just dreaming, you're preparing, you're building belief.
Speaker: And when you unbox, when you begin peeling back the layers of identity that you've worn for others for years, You create the space for that vision to rise up and you remember who you are.
Speaker: You see, unboxing is remembering.
Speaker: So let me take you into a moment in my own life. It was about 10 years ago. I was in England, which is my birth country, and I found myself sitting alone in a field.
Speaker: The sky on that day was gray. The grasses were tall and they were wet from a recent drizzle. And the breeze carried a scent that was both new and also deeply familiar.
Speaker: Everything felt so alive. Everything but me. And i remember whispering out loud, it's no wonder you're hiding here. You always hide when you come here.
Speaker: Hmm. and something inside me broke. I felt it rattle loose. Tears began to flow and so did the truth. And I said, I'm tired of hiding. I'm tired of asking for permission to exist.
Speaker: I'm tired of living as if I'm someone else's mistake.
Speaker: You see, I had mastered the art of being invisible. I had mastered it. As an adoptee, I'd been taught both spoken and unspoken, that my story was too much, maybe that I was too much or simply not enough.
Speaker: My birth mother placed me in foster care to protect her secret, and my birth father never acknowledged me until the very end of his life. I spent years carrying their shame like it was my own, but it never was. it wasn't my shame.
Speaker: And that day in the field was pivotal. I said it out loud. I turned on my phone and I recorded this moment because I needed to hear my own voice say it. I needed to embody it.
Speaker: And this is what I said. i said, I refuse to live inside these boxes anymore. I don't need anyone's permission but my own. I deserve to be here. I deserve to matter.
Speaker: ah deserve to be happy.
Speaker: And in speaking it, in naming the box, I stepped into a much deeper truth. I was never the secret. I was never the shame. I was always the light, always. And it was time for me to step back into that light.
Speaker: So let me tell you about a woman I once coached. She told me she used to be her dad's everything. That is until her younger brother was born. And after that, she felt immediately, she said, invisible.
Speaker: And she spent her growing up years shrinking, staying quiet out of the way. And when I asked her, as an adult now, whose permission do you need to be yourself?
Speaker: She paused and then she cried. And then she said, don't know. And I said, yes, you do. And she said, mine. And I said, bingo.
Speaker: That's the work. And that is the moment it all begins. On the other side of unboxing, you don't find perfection. It doesn't exist. What you do find is permission to live, to feel, to dream, and to return to your you-ness.
Speaker: And so many women tell me, ah used to love painting. i used to love to write. i used to ride horses. And I say,
Speaker: That version of you, she is not gone. She is waiting, waiting for you to come back. You know, I used to hide my love for horses because my maternal grandfather, who was a horse trainer in England, rejected me and shamed me.
Speaker: And I thought riding would connect me to that pain. But after unboxing the shame that was never, ever mine, I ended up getting back in the saddle, literally.
Speaker: I felt at home. i felt whole. I wrote for me. and it felt free. And that's what unboxing can do.
Speaker: So the woman on the other side of unboxing, well, she's not a perfectly polished version of you. She's the real you.
Speaker: She's the real you. She is scarred. She is brave. She is bold. She is unapologetic. And she's the one who finally says, I choose me now, not in a selfish way, but in a sacred way.
Speaker: And, you know, when you get there, you know it, you feel it, you belong. Not because anyone said so, but because you say so.
Speaker: Now in my life, I belong to me. I belong in my life. I embody that feeling. And that my friend is what lives on the other side of unboxing.
Speaker: There's not a to-do list. There's not a reinvention strategy. What there is, is a relationship with yourself that is transformational and profound. It's when you stop abandoning your voice and so start to listen and respond to what stirs your soul.
Speaker: And maybe you already started. Maybe you finally bought the paints. Maybe you danced alone in your kitchen. Maybe you said yes to yourself and no to something that was draining you.
Speaker: And that's what unboxing looks like on the other side. And if you're still in the messy middle, if you've named the box and now you're whispering, now what?
Speaker: Let me tell you, this is your now what? This moment is your now what?
Speaker: So I encourage you to be tender with yourself, to be curious and to let joy guide you home because you're not behind, you're not broken, and you are certainly not too late.
Speaker: You are right on time, right on time to begin again here within this beautiful process of unboxing.
Speaker: And i want to walk you through that beginning. I am hosting a free masterclass and I'm so excited to share this with you. I'm hosting a free masterclass to go even deeper into this work.
Speaker: It's called From Grief to Growth, Unbox Your Identity and Design Your Next Chapter. And if this episode touched something in you, a longing, a truth a tier, then this masterclass is your next right step.
Speaker: It's your next step. So go to the link in the show details to join my wait list because the next chapter of your life, my friend, it is not going to write itself.
Speaker: You're the author now, and I'm going to be right here helping you hold the pen and walking you home to you. I look forward to seeing on the wait list.
Speaker: And until next time, stay unboxed, stay unburdened, and stay completely unapologetically unstoppable.
Speaker: Thank you for joining me on Unboxed, Unburdened, Unstoppable. If today's stories sparked something in you, share this with a friend, subscribe, and commit to walking this path power and purpose with us.
Speaker: Remember, unboxing your fears, doubts, and old stories is the key to unlocking the unstoppable woman inside you. Until next time, stay unboxed, unburdened, and unstoppable.
