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Ep. 52 Bedtime Stories
130 Plays3 years ago
Stirring interrupting the silence of the night. Don't look now but we have unwelcome visitors..
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Transcript
Father's Wisdom: Courage from Inner Light
00:00:13
Speaker
previously on the Hired Swords. How quick we are to forget the warm nights, tucked safely in our childhood beds as we grow older. Afraid of the shadows I was. My father used to tell me, Salfrudin, fear not the dark, for you carry the light with you in here, as he'd put his hand over my heart.
00:00:38
Speaker
I was too young to realize he wasn't talking about Helm or our belief in a higher power or purpose. They was talking about what makes us who we are. Love. I protect my friends and my family out of love. It's all clear now. But Father, the darkness is here. Now. And frankly, I'm terrified.
Meet 'The Hired Swords': Game Begins
00:01:15
Speaker
You're listening to the Hired Swords, a podcast we use as an excuse to wear wizard hats.
00:01:54
Speaker
Thank you, everybody, for tuning in to another episode of the Hired Swords. This is your dungeon master, Michael, just like always. And I've got Blaze with me. Hi, Blaze. I got Cheese. He's got Cheese and he is Krigs. I also got Ash here playing Gwendolyn. Howdy. Hello. Mikey's here. He's Joxer. Howdy, y'all. He's also Southern, apparently. And also Derek is here. He's Daven.
00:02:22
Speaker
Forty-six you asked how much damage I took last time. It was 46 points of damage I'm not just having cheese. I'm eating the cheese. I'm having What kind there's a Colby Jack stick is it spicy wasn't how I met your mother. That's okay That's all right. When we last left off. We weren't talking about cheese.
00:02:45
Speaker
We last left off with 46 damage to Daven from Teld.
Attack of Teld: Shadows Descend
00:02:51
Speaker
He suddenly appeared in the middle of this. He's the one that's been stirring up all this trouble in this goblin village, it seems. He's thrown these shadows at these adventurers. He is now here to seek vengeance, it seems, and he is he's serious. He shot Daven a couple times with this
00:02:51
Speaker
I
00:03:11
Speaker
Uh, his crossbow, he does not seem normal. He doesn't just look like a normal goblin. He's got these weird shadows, like just flailing about him. And this, this crazy mist, the dark mist swirling around him, his eyes glow, this golden, orangish green, weird color. As he called out and said that you, he said, you, you cannot.
00:03:34
Speaker
and he started to attack after he says that as we jump right back into this scenario after he says that he steps backwards behind one of the shadows that he summoned and he starts to move back and he tries to duck away with a natural 20 no one else can see him any longer do I need to show you the 20
00:04:04
Speaker
I picked it up too fast for it to be. I believed you. I believe that you can lie with your rolls of time. It was a 31 total roll, by the way. That is terrible. That's disgusting. Unlike my cheese. That's the end of his turn. It takes us to Joxer. Oh, dear. Round two. Yeah, Joxer.
00:04:31
Speaker
So he saw where two might be now and that is probably where he's gonna go for since I believe Krigs last episode slammed his hammer on two of them. So he is going to walk around Krigs and work his way and take his rapier out.
00:04:59
Speaker
And I'm just going to clarify the one you're attacking is currently like wrapped itself around Krigs, kind of taking up the same space as Krigs almost. So just just roll. Well, that's all I'm saying. Yeah, I'll be fine. I trust you to survive. Whatever I, you know, dish out. Yeah, you're pretty weak. Oh, snap.
00:05:27
Speaker
I think we should have a battle royale. Yeah. Yeah. Now now it's going to get maybe I'll be a little bit more. Oh, so that is a 14. It can hit me. It hits them. Yes. Yeah, that was that was tight. So that will be so this is just the rapier. That is an eight plus a seven. So that's 15 plus
00:05:56
Speaker
And that's 19 damage. And six of that was fire. Okay, so you swing that at them. And when you swing it, you slice through and your sword glows with this fire. You're attacked with the flaming rapier, not the shadow.
00:06:16
Speaker
Yes, this is the flaming rapier. Yeah. So yeah, when you swing through with it, it just sizzles away. This in this shadow turns to steam as it completely dissolves from the from the blow of your magical sword. What is next for you? Ah, yes. So for my my offhand attack, I am going to throw my shadow blade at the other. And that would also be with advantage because it's dim light still, I'd imagine.
00:06:46
Speaker
Oh yeah. That is gone forever. Run away. It was probably a bad one anyway. Play it as it rolls. Wait. Roll it as it plays? Play it as it lies? That's a golf one. So 24, I imagine that probably hits. Yeah, that hits. Okay, so we're going to do ASMR.
00:07:11
Speaker
Little something for everybody. 17, 19 damage. Another one just dissolves as that shadow blade goes through it and dissolves it. What kind of damage does it do? That is psychic. Psychic damage is that. Psychic damage. Don't be immune. Don't be immune.
00:07:35
Speaker
No one's immune to psychic. Okay. No one's immune to an annoying power. Psychic is not on any of the lists at all. It's normal. It goes through and just dissolves it. As it dissolves this creature, the sword flies out away and then comes back to you, I assume. It actually dissipates.
00:07:55
Speaker
Oh,
Shadow Combat: Joxer and Gwen's Magic
00:07:56
Speaker
nice. And then on a dissolve, you see the the creature dissolved. And right behind it, that sword also dissolves right in the face of guess his mother who's still standing there looking confused, thinking she was walking out there to find her husband. And she's standing there, almost in the space that shadow was not knowing it was there. Is that your whole turn jockser?
00:08:21
Speaker
Yeah, so I will, as a bonus action, use Shielding Aura, which is a 10-foot radius around me, and anything that ends its turn in my radius will take damage equal to my Warlock level plus Charisma, and then I take reduced damage.
00:08:48
Speaker
Okay, and the size of that aura, is that just covering you? Yes, and it's a 10 foot around me, and I'll actually probably get closer to the pins. I'll probably go over here. Okay.
00:09:03
Speaker
Okay, so you're standing right up at the pins, looking over the fence towards where these shadows are approaching, barely able to make out these little shadows in the distance because of these light, this light, they are the shadows are currently, they seem strangely in just full on attack mode, like they're following orders, not acting normal, like something that's supposed to be stealthy, like this would act, you have any other actions or anything else you're going to do?
00:09:28
Speaker
I'm gonna I can't see much enough, so I will pass on that one. Okay, so this is the top of the shadows turns The moonbeam shadow first of all tell me what the damage or whatever is on that guy It is 2d10 okay roll that Did he fail or succeed oh, that's right? What does he have to beat
00:09:58
Speaker
16, I think he rolled an 18. That's half damage or no damage takes half. So seven damage, seven damage total sounds good. So this moonbeam suddenly this light from above the light of the beam kind of pulsates from top down and it pulses over this creature and you see it kind of flail a little bit and flicker.
00:10:25
Speaker
And as it does, it takes that seven damage and- It's radiant damage, right? Wounded a little bit. Is it radiant? Yep. Okay, so it actually takes 14 damage.
00:10:39
Speaker
Radiant damage you say you see that as as it seems to strengthen itself but then that that pulsate comes in and it just like Devastates this creature even though it seems like it was bearing down preparing for the for the attack And so it looks like it took even extra damage
00:10:56
Speaker
Anything else, Gwen? Oh yeah, no, that's their turn. Yeah, it's their turn. So I'm like, what's your next thing, Gwen, as you hurt people and it's not even your turn? You are going to, this first shadow is going to step right up to Joxer, unconcerned with any aura. Does it take damage immediately? End of its turn. Okay, so it's going to first try to wrap itself around you and start to drain you with a dirty 20.
00:11:23
Speaker
to hit that will hit and uh that's with your mage armor yeah correct okay yeah 2020 is uh the the armor okay so there's a 16 plus four so um all right so now it's going to roll the 2d6 damage and you need to make a uh oh no it doesn't there's no saving throw five six seven eight necrotic damage so that'll be reduced to four okay and one strength point
00:11:53
Speaker
down unless your aura does anything to protect you from that. I don't believe so. It is just a resistance to all damage. Do we in the aura get advantage or disadvantage and would that matter? On ability checks, not saving throws. Yeah. Yeah. So it's just resistance to all damage for the shielding aura. Another one comes up to you again.
00:12:15
Speaker
This time it only rolls a 10 to hit. That won't do it. While one is kind of engulfing you and wrapping around you, this other one comes up to you and you're able to sidestep it as well as it kind of starts to come around the edge. They both take, what's the damage they take? So it would be 11 radiant damage. 11 radiant damage? Did you double that? I did not. Okay, so 22 radiant damage.
00:12:44
Speaker
So these, this aura pulsates just like that moonbeam did. And both of these things, they don't shriek or make any sound. There's just this silent rear back of their head and this shadow mouth seems to open and gasp and you just hear this air. You just hear like the air suck out of the space.
00:13:02
Speaker
as they're there start to kind of shrivel and shrink up but they're still there they're still standing but not nowhere near as strong as they were not standing hovering floating whatever another one comes out and it approaches gwen and tries to wrap itself around her gwen this is a 14 to hit you
00:13:21
Speaker
No.
Necrotic Struggle: Daven's Pain
00:13:22
Speaker
No. So I have plus two from haste. You're able to kind of dip yourself down away from it as it doesn't and it doesn't do any damage. So full disclosure, haste is a concentration spell. I should have to roll for that. Okay.
00:13:38
Speaker
Roll for that, thank you for your honesty. So the first damage that I took was 24 plus 14, that's 38. So I have to roll a 19 in order to hold concentration, right? Oh my goodness.
00:13:52
Speaker
Why is everyone ruining everything I want to do? Natural 20. No way. Natural 20 plus seven. Nice. We're good. Awesome. Yeah, you're good. It's not ruined after all, Gwendolyn. Nice roll. That was awesome. Thank you. Good job rolling that. Clutch roll. Good job rolling that. That was good. Thank you. I appreciate it. You know, honesty pays off, man. You didn't suffer. OK. So the one more that just got kind of summoned starts to make its way towards
00:14:22
Speaker
You guys as well. I don't know if it can get all the way to you or not. I'm gonna find out if it can reach anybody. Oh, it can reach anybody it wants. This one's going for Daven. They're fast little boys. Yeah, they are. They got 40 feet. I don't appreciate them going after Daven. This is, Daven's my boy toy. Oh, okay. A little too specific there. That is a 21. No, I mean like, you got lots of necklaces and I, you know, I'm really, I got,
00:14:53
Speaker
Nevermind. 11 damage. Okay. Necrotic damage. And you lose three points from your strength score. That's very bad. Okay.
00:15:06
Speaker
though this thing wraps itself around Devin Devin you feel your body just start to shrivel and dry up in the wounds that you have start to just lose with more blood and and almost like they were the age the wounds age like they've been untreated they start to feel infected from this necrotic damage and you just cry out in pain as it's just kind of fills your body with this extra pain and like death is coming
00:15:31
Speaker
way prematurely for you. The other creature here that took that damage, he's going to go ahead up to Krigs and he's going to try to get to Krigs. His attack is a four plus four. That's an eight. Oh, that definitely hits. He approached to his doom. The moonbeam stays where you put it, right?
00:15:52
Speaker
Does he take damage when he leaves it or no? Correct. Just starting his turn. Okay. Just starting his turn. Yeah. Okay. Thank you. And that I believe finishes the turn of these creatures, but at the end of this turn, we're going to see if Teld can do a legendary action. He cannot. So it is now.
00:16:15
Speaker
All right, so Derek, why don't you go ahead and roll your saving throw for the attack you just took from the shadows. Joxer, you also took damage as well. Yes, so shadow blade, I need to do console 24. I'm good as well. OK, another 24. So that is a 16 natural. So I took four damage, so I think that'll be all right. And then I took no damage on the other ones. We're good. Great. All right, then, Krigs, we are now at your turn.
Divine Intervention: Krigs and Daven Strike Back
00:16:40
Speaker
Okay, so the battlefield, I have two between me and Joxer that are technically aligned. Davin is over the way. He is wrapped up, I'm assuming, in that one. It's not like it would just be an easy hit. Correct, it is currently sharing space with him. Okay. Man, I don't want to risk hitting him.
00:17:10
Speaker
That would decimate him. Um, I am, you know, fireballs his way. That's not a good idea. I am going to, uh, raise my hammer and just feeling entirely overwhelmed by the current situation at hand. I'm going to very, uh, just very quietly, like whisper, like please wilds.
00:17:38
Speaker
Help us. And I'm going to swing my hammer down with all my might down at the shadow directly in front of me that wasn't able to hit me. All right. I'm going to roll a. Not great. Hopefully it's enough. What is my hammer plus seven? That is a six plus seven. So well, hold on. Hammer is the plus one. So does it add that to the roll? Yes.
00:18:08
Speaker
So seven to your strength and any magical addition. So yeah, so 14. Yep, you need a 12. So that hits. OK, I'll roll my damage on that. Well, that is 10 bludgeoning damage, 10 bludgeoning damage on this creature and.
00:18:32
Speaker
All right, so you swing that, swing that hammer down and it again slices all like hits all the way through and lands on the ground. Dust comes up and kind of joins the dispelling mist around this creature as a darkness swirls and the thing kind of comes back, but it's barely visible as there's not much left of this creature. You've dispelled so much with this attack and you have a second attack, I believe.
00:18:57
Speaker
Yeah, and I swing again with just all my might, which feels drained because I have lost some strength. I'm feeling rough. I rolled the exact same thing. So 14. Yeah, it's another hit. And rolling damage. 17 damage.
00:19:21
Speaker
So this time you swing across it and as you do, it's just like, it's like the fire's gone out and there's smoke there and you just kind of fan the smoke and it just kind of dissipates as nothing's left. And you just stand there and looking beyond you, you can see you're still your, how long does your detecting undead? How long does that last? 10 minutes. Yeah, so you're definitely still seeing these creatures light up all over the place. And you do see a faint,
00:19:51
Speaker
glow back in the back beyond the animals back by the back of the pin. So with that one slain, I'm going to step forward into the other one that is just behind Joxer. You know what? How far away am I from the shadow I see off in the distance that I heard speak?
00:20:21
Speaker
40 feet. 40 feet away. Man, I don't have enough walking speed. Okay, I'm gonna walk forward straight to the one that is directly behind Joxer and I'm going to
00:20:36
Speaker
feel something. I'm going to feel a little bit of a call from the wild, at least a response for the original prayer that I had, and it's going to kind of invigorate me. And with that feeling, the kind of swirl of light from
00:20:55
Speaker
just the natural sources and the trees and the forest nearby, I am going to channel divinity, feral slaughter. So on a bonus action, I can channel the rebuking spirits of the wildlands to repel trespassers. So basically I get one attack and if I hit, I can attack once more. So it's like a extra attack. And I'm going to two-handed swing and you're going to hear
00:21:23
Speaker
me cry out just raging. And then behind my voice is just the screams of the forest spirits. So hopefully I don't miss because that would be really lame. Yeah, really exciting. But yeah, seven plus seven. So I got 15 that time. Yeah, you hit and rolling damage. Oh, 14. What about your plus one magic? Right. Yeah. So I feel a little doofy because of math.
00:21:52
Speaker
My damage on that is going to be 11 and I'm going to, unless he's dead, I'm going to make a second attack with that. He's dead. You have to target the same creature? Is that what it says? Okay, yeah. So that one did it. It dispersed him. And again, just a poof of this mist and he's gone. Is that the end of your turn?
00:22:12
Speaker
Yeah, and from me, whenever I actually make that hammer attack, whenever it hits the ground, because it goes straight through them, you see the dust is kind of illuminated, bioluminescence in a way, kind of glowing with the spirits of the wild as they dissipate back into nature in and of itself. So it goes very much through me and out the hammer.
00:22:35
Speaker
into the ground and disperses. Awesome. And then as you swing through and that disperses, seeing you devastating these minions, the shadow tell takes a legendary action and fires two crossbow bolts at you. The first one, you can try that first one is a 19 plus. It is just a second one.
00:23:03
Speaker
is a 16 total. That doesn't hit. So the first hit does the d8 11 piercing damage make us make a constitution saving throw. 13 plus three so 16.
00:23:29
Speaker
16 just saves and so you don't take any poison damage or you take half the poison damage of course is So what is the poison damage that I'm gonna roll it right now? 76 wait What I'm a poison I'm a dwarf so I have advantage against saving throws against poison. Okay. Well, you already saved Yeah, you're right. Never mind. I was gonna try to do like a double say just take half on
00:23:59
Speaker
It doesn't say resistance, it just says advantage. I am resistance against poison, I have resistance against poison damage. So you have resistance and you get advantage. Okay, so you on a saving throw, you don't take any if you have a life. So yeah, hashtag dwarf life. So congratulations, dwarf man, you don't take any so you feel again that that one arrow goes in and starts to flood around you in but nope, it doesn't do any. Oh, wait, it's a plus 10 to hit. So
00:24:27
Speaker
18 still doesn't hit you, does it? No. What's your armor class? 19. Yeah. Yeah. So I was, I was adding the, the average damage, not the thing. So, all right.
00:24:44
Speaker
How close are you to his ally? I wanna make sure you're not supposed to take sneak attack damage on that as well. No, you're not, because you killed the guy that was gonna give him sneak attack on you. So yeah, you take that one crossbow bolt, fight off that poison feeling as it starts to sting and you recognize that, you're like, no, I've built an immunity to iocane. So you feel fine, you're not hurting. And that is the end of that legendary action. And that reference is gonna mess with me for like a week. That's amazing. Davin, it's on you, buddy.
00:25:14
Speaker
All right. Um, I'm going to take a risk here. Gavin is angry and he's going to look at the shadow creature in front of him and his eyes just turned completely pure white. Um, and he's going to pull his hands apart and both of them are going to be glowing white and he's going to twin spell guiding bolt at fourth level to the shadow in front of him and the one on Gwen. All right. Those are attack rolls. Yes. So the one in front of me is with disadvantage.
00:25:42
Speaker
Spooky demon boy is not happy. But it is 10 plus eight. So it's 18 to hit the guy in front of me. Definitely just blows right through him. What's the damage or are you going to roll the other one first? Yeah, I'll roll the other one first. The one on her is a five plus eight is a 13 hit. It does, believe it or not. Yes. We so fourth level guiding bolt is 76. Kid God.
00:26:11
Speaker
You hear the shadow say, ouchie. Yep. 22, 28, 28 radiant damage. All right. So I believe that would be doubled. That's doubled. Yeah. Well, I mean, it's got a total of 27 hit points maximum. So 56 total. So suddenly this
00:26:35
Speaker
You see this beam of light and lightning. Did you roll your T6 for lightning damage? This ball explodes almost like a nuclear explosion.
00:26:50
Speaker
around Davin and this thing is just absorbed in this white light and gone and the light fades and you see Davin standing there, his eyes glowing, having shunted this creature off of himself with this magic and then he fires another one at the one on Gwendolyn. Did you hit that one? You did hit it. Yeah, and that one was more. It's 58 plus three more. Okay, so that creature also- Does the spell potentially, does she have to save against it or?
00:27:19
Speaker
It says, spell the hit, so I guess that's up to the DM. It didn't hit you, right? Before Gwen, it missed you. Yeah, so it's in front of Gwen. It wasn't wrapping around Gwen. Look, I'm just used to things being all over me at this point. This light just, it's like somebody shined a spotlight on this creature and a beam just goes through it. And as it does, the thing just turns into, it's like,
00:27:46
Speaker
It's like steam, but the steam falls instead of rising and just dissolves across the ground as there's this black mist that disappears in front of you and you're now standing with nothing. No more of these creatures around you. Daven, what next? Daven, his eyes still burning white. He just looks up and says, Tal, you're next. Then he's going to swoop his cape through and then with his second action because of hate, he's going to cast Dimension Door.
00:28:12
Speaker
And he's going to hide behind this hut over here. And the second he reappears behind this hut, he goes, and he pulls the, uh, the arrow out of his gut. Okay. All right. Uh, so that's all of Davin's turn. Gwendolyn, we're on your turn now. Uh, Gwendolyn is just shocked by everything. And I think with that, she is going to lose concentration on the moon beam.
00:28:38
Speaker
that she had created because the smoke in front of her just disappeared and she can't see Daven anywhere. So she just did Daven and she starts running towards and just without thinking she's going to run towards the aura and she's going to cast Mascure Wounds with her staff. Okay.
00:29:06
Speaker
So you run into that aura and Cass's healing spell. Let's be healing, mommy. Davin didn't walk into the glowing pink and sparkly. Nope. The person who needs the healing the most aura. Yeah. Plus. Sorry, I am auto rolling them. Go, go. Wow. Five. That's a lot.
00:29:35
Speaker
So everyone gets 25 and then droxaring krigs would get an extra 10. Yeah. Because of the totem. All right. So what's the range on that? 30 feet. All right. So that is, uh, I think Davens in range. Yep. He has these 25 feet from me because I can put it wherever I want.
00:29:58
Speaker
Okay. You guys got it. You got it. So I get the 25 feeling? Yes. 25. That's like half my hit points. Yay. He's a real bully. Is everyone okay? What is happening? And she sees they're just rubbing her eye because a little bit of smoke had gotten into it when she had ran over.
00:30:21
Speaker
Being now max health and just feeling completely invigorated, minus the strength, I still feel a little torn about that. I'm gonna call out, Teld, I had nothing to do with your death before, but this time, this time. All right, Gwynis, was that your whole turn? Yeah, and she's gonna say, Teld.
00:30:46
Speaker
Okay. And look around. That's it. That takes us to Teld's turn. He is going to pop Joxer with a crossbow bolt as he's hidden from Joxer still. So and Joxer is engaged. So he gets advantage. So the first one was a 26 second one is a 28. So the damage starts off as a
00:31:13
Speaker
Five plus... I have a feeling that, like, that healing spell was clutch on these boys. Nine. So, nine total damage there, make your saving throw, constitution saving throw. Before that happens, I'm kind of a monk and I can deflect missiles. Okay. So, I get to deflect...
00:31:36
Speaker
Um, one D 10 plus eight damage. Okay. Uh, so that's 17 damage on that one. And if I reduce it to zero and have a free hand, which I do, cause the blade isn't back in my hand, I can use this key point to throw it back at him. You don't know where he is. I didn't see where he, well, you saw the general area. I'd let you throw it back at him at disadvantage. Okay.
00:32:02
Speaker
I'll do the low light and just pure darkness and you just hear I know. I know. I got I got one. I got one more luck point just in case. So 13 plus with this. What would you consider? Is this a deck based? Yeah, dexterity. So that would be plus seven. So 20. Yeah, that hits for sure. OK, so you and so I don't know what the damage is, but if it's covered in poison, he would get the poison.
00:32:31
Speaker
Yeah. Okay. So he, uh, it hits him and he took nine damage from that hitting him. Oh, I could go in. He pulled a toma and then, yeah. Right. And then, uh, another one fires at you from there. This one is a 26 to hit. That'll, that'll hit. It's going to do.
00:33:01
Speaker
Oh, wow. Good. Uh, eight plus five. That's not good. These aren't 13 damage. And then you make the saving throw a constitution saving throw gotta be to 15. Okay. Just I'm assuming deflect missile has to use a reaction. So I'm sorry. So that is a 13. What, what was the saving throw? I'm sorry.
00:33:28
Speaker
The saving throw was a constitution. Is that constitution? You wrote, you rolled a what? 13 plus two 15. 15 is what you needed. So you take half of this. 12, 18, 28. Game is rolling good tonight.
00:33:46
Speaker
37 halved. So you take, so that'd be half of 36 damage. So 13, 18, 18 damage. Yeah. Matt's good for me. And then I forgot the sneak attack damage as well. Uh, but the sneak attack was the first one, right? So yeah, yeah, you're right. You're right. You're right. Because you, and he missed you on that one. So there you go. So you took that 18 plus the initial, uh, yeah, 16. So.
00:34:16
Speaker
And that is his action there. He is now, you hear him call out and he says, he says, she sent me and I will not fail. Breathe in this like deep gasping breath. Do I recognize the reference she sent me? Does that call back to maybe the hag or anything?
00:34:44
Speaker
Make a history check. Let's see if you remember that. And you hear jocks are essentially like, I didn't start this. It was this. No.
Mystery Unfolds: Teld's Revelation
00:34:56
Speaker
I mean, did you? History for me is not great. Fourteen.
00:35:05
Speaker
plus zero. Okay, a 14. So you, you don't remember any mention of a she or anything like that. But you definitely remember a that look on that hags face that was like they had failed something, something they were about to suffer the consequences of their failure. And then the
00:35:28
Speaker
that tell you you were finally able to kind of make out where they were jocks or were told was until backs away and you see him disappear into the shadows. And that takes us now to jocks turn. And he starts with, how could you do this to your family?
00:35:48
Speaker
They're suffering. And then he is. He still has the shadow on him, so he is going to, I guess, flail a little bit with with his hands flame rapier. Oh, the right guy. Yeah, he's going to like just want to fly off himself. It's like there's a little bit of fire. I can I can get rid of that light a little bit or the darkness. I don't know. And start with that.
00:36:19
Speaker
That will That is an 11 4 plus 7 or no 4 plus 8 so 12 12 to hit definitely hits whoo that is the AC that's getting tighter and tighter man. Yeah 5 plus 4 so that's 9 piercing and then 8 fire and
00:36:44
Speaker
17 total. All right, that dissolves this one as this rapier kind of flails up and the flame follows it and just burns away. It sizzles away what was left of that shadow as it dissipates and dies. And what are you going to do next? Do I am I able to see anything at all? You can make a perception check and that'll end your turn the time it takes to really look hard to try to find them. That'll that'll be good. Oh, I'll use that.
00:37:14
Speaker
16 plus 170.
00:37:19
Speaker
Yeah, you're not, you're just seeing darkness. The goblins that had been kind of looking and peeking to see what was happening, they are nowhere in sight either. In fact, even Giss' mom has turned and ran the other way, seeing this crazy magic being cast and all this crazy stuff happening. She's finally come out of her stupor and headed back to hide. So you see that it is just you guys, these animals, these animals, their agitation is increasing.
00:37:46
Speaker
And you notice one of the boars starts to look around and starts to seem aggressive. It's pretty slow, but it's looking pretty aggressive. We'll say Tad over here is looking like it's trying to find somebody possibly to take out its aggression on or maybe a tree again. Who knows? For those listening, we named the boars on the map, Tad and Dan.
00:38:08
Speaker
There's Tad and Dan and Barb or Bev. What was it? It was Beth. Beth. Beth is dead. It was Beth. And the goats are Terry and Sam. You monster. I just want to name them.
00:38:19
Speaker
Everything should have a name. What's funny is I didn't know that happened until I came up on the map today because you did it while I was on that other map with Daven while he was searching Darnaldi's house in the last session. So it sat there for a week before I even saw it. It's a very Gwyn thing to do. Let's be real. Oh, yeah. I knew the color. I knew that the the sign handwriting or mouse writing, I guess you could call it.
00:38:40
Speaker
Let's definitely go in. OK, so is that your whole turn, Jockster? Yeah, I just said it had to be. Yeah, yeah. So we are now I was going to say the shadows and you don't see any. None seem to be attacking you as you all kind of look and you're holding your holding your your attention in this darkness, trying to see if something's coming. Nothing seems to at this point. And we will go to Craig's turn. Is told within 30 feet of me currently. Make a perception check.
00:39:11
Speaker
How old is Teld? You do not see a Teld. What did you say, Gwen? How old is he? You don't know. He was old enough to be Gis's father when he died. Okay, that's what I was getting at. Joxer killed him. You saw Joxer kill him. And you know that Teld was Gis's father from the conversation you had with Darnaldi in that whole case against him with the chief and stuff. I just hate that guy, so...
00:39:41
Speaker
Telled? No, Denaldi. Oh, right, right, right, right. Not a friend of the group. Being that I can't see Telled, I know that he is around. I'm going to call out pretty loudly, Devin, and see if I get a response because I know that he was hurt pretty bad. All right. Does he get a response, Devin? Yeah, he says, I'm fine, I'm fine.
00:40:11
Speaker
I'm going to run to the voice because I know how stubborn he is. He's just in range of me to be able to reach. I'm going to run just around the hut where he, I find a Daven whimpering a little bit, but a little bit less after Gwyn cast her healing. And I'm going to cast Lay on Hands on
00:40:39
Speaker
Devin and give him. I'm going to dump 25 HP into you, buddy. All right. That sounds spicy. Heck yeah. I'm just going to. Massage your shoulders and be like, get back in the game. You got this. We have we have enemies afoot.
00:41:03
Speaker
Can he reach his shoulders? He's on the ground like kind of sitting, like whimpering after he is hurt. I imagine him just be like holding his knee. Oh, like he's. I think I think a Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I like it. I love that. All right, is that your whole turn? Yeah, I think I'm just going to leave it at that. I don't want to. All right, Devin, that's your turn. It's your turn now.
00:41:33
Speaker
All right, having a look at him, just kind of give a nod and then I'll use two sorcery points to turn a regular spell into a bonus action. And I'm going to cast Mage Armor on myself so I can finally get a little bit more protection.
00:41:47
Speaker
All righty. And then I'm going to walk around this hut so that I'm back in view of where everything is, so I can see everything. And then with my second action from haste, I'm going to hold it if I can and hold a, let's say, a firebolt in case I see him come back into view. Okay, great. What next? Gwen, are we on you now? I mean, it's your turn if Daven's done. Yeah.
00:42:15
Speaker
Um, I, I try to look for Devin, um, while he's coming around the corner. Um, but I can't see him, but I feel like I would notice the tension happening in this cage of boars and goats. And I am going to cast animal friendship and point my attention to them. And I'm going to cast it at fifth level. So I get all four of them. Ooh. Okay. Nice bit.
00:42:45
Speaker
Let me move on over and say howdy do to many friends. All right, they're in the middle of the of the area. The pin there you step right in the middle of the pin, but they're all stirring and frustrated. They're kind of saving throw anything like that. I'm looking right now. Yes, these intelligences for hire the spell fails.
00:43:07
Speaker
Otherwise they must succeed on the wisdom saving throw or be Trump. So the I have to make four wisdom saving throws for these creatures. And wisdom can't be great. Wisdom can't be great on a boar and a goat. Yeah, mine is 212. So 10 for boar one per tad five for boar two, Dan.
00:43:29
Speaker
What's the goat? Does the goat have better wisdom than the boar? Let's see. The boar is a minus one. It does have better. They're way more wise. 11 for the first goat and two for the second goat. So they are all your goats and boars now. So you own all these animals like you. Most successful. Is that your whole turn?
00:43:53
Speaker
Yeah, she's trying to round them all up. It's okay, just calm down. She starts to pull trail mix out of her bag and spread it on the ground. By the way, when you talk about boars and goats together, you just combine and call them boats.
00:44:08
Speaker
That way. I like it. All the boats. He's better than Gores. He's both in. In Gores. So, Teld sees you come into the middle there, and as his legendary
Teld's Assault: Gwen's Defence
00:44:20
Speaker
action, he makes his two attacks against you there. And his... Yeah, so a 19 to hit is the first one. Actually, it's a 21 to hit. And the second one,
00:44:37
Speaker
is a 26 to hit. So the first one does d eight six damage plus the sneak attack 66 sneak attack damage as well comes to a total of that's a lot of ones and threes 18 more damage from the sneak attack there as well.
00:45:06
Speaker
And in doing so, does he reveal himself to me as I am looking for him? And so he is revealed, but it is now his turn. And so his crossbow having been loaded, he had an idea in Gwendolyn changed it. So as he's kind of ducking down behind these, this fence, he fires two more crossbows also at Gwendolyn.
00:45:36
Speaker
All right. No. Twenty five. Twenty five two fifteen's in a row. And then the higher swords dice is doing better for me this time. So no sneak attack damage on that. By the way, I need you to make two constitution saving throws me for those two other hits. I'm going to have to have a conversation with Starbuck about these dice rolls. Yeah. I don't like it.
00:46:03
Speaker
Uh, 16 for the first roll. That's a save. So you take half of what I'll roll in a minute. Oh, snap. 18 plus four. Okay. So you have 22. You have two 76 rolls. Get out of here. This is just that first. I hope it's all ones. Four, five, six, one more seven. Um, it's not all ones.
00:46:29
Speaker
And it's in a little bit of trouble here I think. 26 halves so you take 13 damage from the first hit. That's poison damage. Oh cool. And then you take...
00:46:43
Speaker
26 halved again. So 13 damage from the second hit. Wow. I rolled 26 twice in a row on 66 or 76 two times. That's crazy. And then that was just that first. So the second hit you took nine damage from the first hit the second attacks on his actual turn. So nine damage from the crossbow bolt. I need you to make another constitution saving throw.
00:47:07
Speaker
So I took 13 twice and now I need to roll a constitution saving throw for the third one. Correct. For the third. All right. The first hit of his turn. The last two was his attack action on his legendary action. OK. Which he did at the end of your turn, actually. Get rekt to 19. 19. Make another saving throw for the last hit. Oh, my God. As I half this damage.
00:47:36
Speaker
Oh my god. A dirty 20. Get out of here. 23 halved. So that would be 11 poison damage. And then the second one is halved again because you saved all those. Nice job. Yeah, I got my boyfriends.
00:47:57
Speaker
23 have again so 11 another 11. That's weird that I rolled 26 twice in a row on both turns. I mean, yeah, I feel like that's just I must be surely I'm counting wrong or something what Okay, so that was an 11 more damage. Yeah, then Go ahead. No. No, I was just saying I went from 87 to 39. So that's so then he starts to back away again and
00:48:23
Speaker
Do I get to use my hold action? Yes. Yeah, he's in it. He's in range for a review for sure Okay, it's 15 but I'm gonna make sure that this hits and I'm going to use my you know what? No, I'm just gonna say 15 15 to hit. Yes 15 is his armor class sweet. So it's but he has a reaction as a reaction
00:48:51
Speaker
he shifts himself and you see suddenly four of him as these shadow mists kind of form and go around him and your attack actually hits a different one and knocks it away and dissolves it and he's still fine. He continues to scurry away and takes his bonus action to hide. And he is now, well, we'll see how hidden he is.
00:49:22
Speaker
After I roll this, okay. So that takes us, that is his turn. He is hidden again and that takes us to Joxer's turn. Well, that's no fun if he's hidden. That's his bread and butter, baby. I don't know if there's much I can do.
00:49:50
Speaker
I feel at this point, seeing that, uh, I guess, uh, Gwendolyn is, uh, damaged, but you know, safe with her friends and then saw
00:50:08
Speaker
Tailed run at least as far as he could tell maybe like on this side of the farm Area or the yeah, it seems like he ran that direction. Yeah Tell it's kind of seeing his head bob a little bit above that fence as you ran by yeah, I'd probably jump the fence and As a
00:50:33
Speaker
A bonus action, I'd, well, no, no, no. I'd probably just yell out again in the same vein of, your family is suffering. How could you do this? Forget about any other, anything else that's plaguing you. Just think of your family, Gis, and your wife. All right, is that your whole turn?
00:51:01
Speaker
And I'll just take a defensive action. OK, sounds good. Good idea. All right, that's going to take us now to Krigs. Why have you done this? I'm assuming with me, especially as far out as I am now, that I cannot see him.
00:51:26
Speaker
No, you cannot. Sorry, I muted myself instead of unmuting. No, you do not see him. Sick. I'm going to call out loudly. I am Ember. I am Oak. And my cloak is going to transform back into those two blue jay wings. And I am going to rise into the sky roughly about
00:51:53
Speaker
20 feet and I am going to fly over towards the the pin roughly about 40 feet away using up the entirety of my movement that technically it wouldn't be math and an angle and everything else like that but can I see it see him like now
00:52:19
Speaker
you currently do not see anything else undead or anything glowing around you, no? Okay, well, this is my action. I'm just gonna sit here and hover and wait and see for an opportune moment that I can strike. I'm not able to really do too much. I'm gonna sit here as a target and hope for the best. Okay, that takes us to Gwendolyn. Hello.
00:52:48
Speaker
Basically I fall down to my knees after getting struck so many times. I skipped to Davin. That's very rude. It takes us to Davin. I'm very rude. Davin Gwendolyn falls to her knees and then what do you do? See, I did on purpose. It was all, it was for the story. It was narrative. Davin's getting a little annoyed by this guy. He's going to rush forward and he's going to try and take this, use this tree for cover, but he wants to try and get, um, which one was the last time we saw him? Like which direction was he heading?
00:53:17
Speaker
He was on the other side of the pin, all the way towards the huts over there, and was heading southward, running between the huts and the back fence of the pin there that the animals are in. Okay, Daven's going to run forward about 30 feet, give or take. Kind of get close to Krigs. And he's going to prepare a spell, and he's going to start holding a spell in case he comes back again. Okay.
00:53:44
Speaker
All right. Is that, that's everything you're going to do then. So we are going as she's on our knees now. Correct. And she's just, she doesn't know what's going to happen. She just is staring around and making sure instead of making sure she's okay, she's making sure that the boars and goats are okay. And I'm going to say she readies an attack. Um, actually I'm going to,
00:54:14
Speaker
cast bark skin on myself. Okay, bark skin. So you have a rough bark like appearance and your AC can't be less than 16 regardless of what kind of armor you're wearing. That's cool. Correct. And as she touches her arm, you see like little riffs pop up like bark on a tree all over her skin. And she's just sitting there just breathing, just trying to. I am Gwen. Nice.
00:54:44
Speaker
All right. Is that the whole, is that your whole turn? Uh, yeah, I want to move my totem probably, um, more south. So it's centered on myself. Okay. I will move the, that on the map. So the, the totem, this pink, it's sparkly, uh, aura kind of starts to move around if I can grab the thing. Oh, I know why. Uh, and it now is,
00:55:13
Speaker
surrounding Gwendolyn uh perfectly in the middle so this thing just around this pen and all these animals in here are in this pink aura now with the pink with the sparkles in it at the end of Gwendolyn's turn again Telda is going to take his legendary second legendary action he did his first one in hiding um and he's going to you suddenly hear from above you Joxer from on top of this uh the roof of this hut you hear this this
00:55:43
Speaker
And this creature falls down on top of you and makes two short sword attacks with his legendary action.
Joxer's Peril: Ambushed by Teld
00:55:53
Speaker
The first one is a 26. Those would be a disadvantage. OK. Which would have been a straight roll. Would have been a straight roll because he would get advantage with being a sneak attack on the first one. OK, OK. So he gets 26. And then the second one is at a disadvantage if he hits you with the first one. Yeah. Still, OK.
00:56:13
Speaker
So the second one is a 19. It does not hit. OK. So the first one hits. And so you make a constitution saving throw for the poison. I will do the piercing damage. OK. So 19 is a constitution. 19 saves. So you'll do half of the seven. OK.
00:56:40
Speaker
Total here with the D8 and the 66 is 5, 10, 16, 22, 27, 31 points of damage from the slicing of this sword with the sneak attack as he's able to stand up there and stare you down for a second before he attacks and pick exactly where he wants to go, going right from your neck and your shoulder slashing right across your chest.
00:57:10
Speaker
How it's going to be a sick scar at least. And then then the poison as you feel it kind of start to like go through your body. Twenty one half so ten poison damage as well. And then it is now his turn.
00:57:29
Speaker
I held action does it come after his turn or forced it comes. We'll let it happen right right at that second attack when he becomes he misses, but he became visible there after his after his first hit. So go ahead and make that attack.
00:57:46
Speaker
Mine is actually granted go ahead good I was gonna say as you look at him You do still see two more of these other shadow versions of him swirling around him. Okay? So I'm not doing it to hit spell. It's he's got to make a charisma saving throw charisma saving throw. Yes 16 Charisma you roll in 19 plus Yeah, well minus one so 18
00:58:16
Speaker
Um, let me make sure I can't do anything to make this work. I don't think I can. Nope. Just fails. Okay. Okay. Well then he makes two more short sort attacks at jockser at disadvantage at disadvantage and no longer. Uh, so the first one is a 24, 14 and an 18 second one is a, oh my gosh, it's 19 and a 16. So a 26, those are both in.
00:58:45
Speaker
Wow, these are gonna keep, I'm gonna keep rolling those. Those are just doing the D8 make two constitution saving throws for those poison, potential poison. So 11 from the first piercing. And oh, that's 13. Okay, so 16 total piercing damage. Two, three, four, five, six, seven. The first poison, which is halved,
00:59:14
Speaker
Three sixes, two fives, a three and a two. So 12. Ooh, this is not good. Chuck, sir. 18. That'll create. 33 halved, so 16 damage of poison. So that poison surges through your body and it's just too much for you as you black out and start to go unconscious. And he goes ahead and makes that second attack against you and hits.
00:59:42
Speaker
And, um, he's, he's not gonna, he's not going to walk away from you once you've fallen down. Uh, so, uh, especially you being who you are. And so as he swings, whoa, I dropped the dice as he swings and he makes that second attack on you. That was a 26 to hit you. Um, it auto hits and you lose two death saving throws automatically. Yeah. Um, that puts us at the end of his turn.
01:00:12
Speaker
Actually, he's gonna step away. Well, he's not gonna step away. He's gonna stay right where he is. Yeah, he's gonna stay right where he is. He's not gonna leave Joxer there. He's visible though. You all see him. And there he stands. And it is where we will leave this episode. I just looked at the time. Joxer's gonna die. All right. Oof. Ash, you're muted.
01:00:41
Speaker
I think she's muted on purpose, maybe. Oh, man. Thank you for listening to episode five of our second season. And it's going fast. We really appreciate you joining us for this adventure. If you enjoyed our show, tell a friend about us. And if you really enjoyed it, tell the world and leave a review.
01:01:11
Speaker
Be sure to check out our shop at thehired.store. If you want to keep up with us and what we're up to, you can find us on Twitter and Facebook, as well as Instagram at thehiredswords. And again, thank you for listening.