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First Impressions of The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim! (Spoilers)
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In this episode, Satsunami and Martin MacAlistair take to the mean streets of Glasgow to discuss a film in a car again. This time they discuss their thoughts on the latest entry to the Lord of the Rings series The War of the Rohirrim. But with a lukewarm reception, does this film prove to be more than meets the eye? Or is it one that was better left in the history books? Without any further ado, this is our spoiler filled first impressions of The Lord of the Rings: The War of the Rohirrim!
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Transcript
Introduction to 'First Impressions' with Martin McAllister
00:00:05
Speaker
Welcome to Chatsunami.
00:00:17
Speaker
Hello everybody and welcome to another episode of Hobb. Well, first impressions I suppose is the unofficial name for this sub-series. I am joined today by the one and only, what of the random enthusiasts who've seen it twice in a row now. It is Martin McAllister. Martin, welcome back.
Recording from a Car in Glasgow
00:00:35
Speaker
Thank you. What this sub-series should be called is podcast, aren't it, in a car? What is it, carpool karaoke?
00:00:43
Speaker
Yeah, podcast karaoke. Yes, once again, put with the curtain back a little bit. We are indeed in someone's car in the middle of Glasgow. Wait, can we say it? Let's clarify. It's your car, not just someone's car.
00:00:57
Speaker
Well, now you've got my sweat in. It's like, okay, I don't know whose car we're in. We went and opened some doors. We're in a car. It's time to talk about podcasts. I'll do it.
First Impressions of the New 'Lord of the Rings' Anime Film
00:01:08
Speaker
So yeah, we are just out of Lord of the Rohidram, the latest. I can't believe I'm saying this, but the latest Lord of the Rings film, right? I have to say it was pretty good. Yeah. Spoilers. Yeah. No spoilers. Thank you for listening. No, really, I was surprised because before we go into, you know, what we thought about this one and everything, what did you think about this? See when it was first announced when people were saying, oh, there's going to be a new Lord of the Rings film, it's going to be entirely anime, they rolled out the red-haired anime character and you thought, what did you think about that? I had no idea what was going to happen. Like I was so confused of why was this film made and I still haven't seen it pulled the cut back a little bit. I've seen it twice now, yesterday and today. Not because I'm like super obsessed with Lord of the Rings, just because I've arranged two times in a row. But I had no idea what to expect. I still don't understand why this film was made. Again, I really liked it. I don't know what the thought process was. So that was my first impression and it's still my impression. What
Exploring 'Lord of the Rohidram' Lore and Reception
00:02:03
Speaker
about you? What did you think? Yeah, again, mirroring what you're saying, I genuinely thought, why are they making this? Because at the time of recording this, the first two seasons of the Lord of the Rings, Rings of Power, that's out on Amazon and have to
00:02:48
Speaker
hours there was another kind of transition to Water the Rehiram which again it was really you thought that was interesting there's a lot of stories to tell there a lot of clans a lot of things like that and then and again when they go off I think everybody in the comments were going And especially because the word of a hero is like two paragraphs. It's not even anything of any note, apart from Helm Hamheil, the main guy himself. He's mentioned a lot in the books because Helm's deep. Apart from that, none of this is ever a big part of the story. You know what I mean? They've just picked something a complete random and gone, this. It's like, you know when you open a book like the Argos category? you just press. Press your finger yeah. You go oh I want that thing. This is their thought process I think they just said. This would be cool. But yeah I have to say it's been kind of strewn for a while and I'm going to be honest the marketing for this was
00:03:40
Speaker
it boy wasnt If I hadn't been married to a Lord of the Rings obsessed person, I wouldn't have known this was coming out. And also it's only out in cinema for like a week, two weeks. I read on a comment and read it and is this was really funny. This came out the same day in the States as Craven the Hunter did. oh And they're calling it like the reverse Barbieheimer.
00:03:58
Speaker
It's like, how quickly can he clear out two cinemas in one day? What would you even call that?
Film's Marketing Challenges and Niche Appeal
00:04:03
Speaker
Ro-hanum? The marketing's been terrible, but it's a hard film to market because anime's pretty niche and Lord of the Rings for all it's popular, it's still kind of niche in itself, you know what I mean? Like in terms of like, people aren't gonna go see Lord of the Rings because it's Lord of the Rings, they want to go see hobbits in the day, day, day, day, day, day. you know they want the things it's like Star Wars like people aren't rushing out to see solo yeah whatever it has to be themed i mean it's true to be fair because even with myself the only Lord of the Rings obsessed person i have in my life is probably Andrew to be fair and even then i think we're all in a kind of niche circle of yeah we're avid Lord of the Rings fans but at the same time this film it kind of came out underwear then the hype the marketing there was nothing
00:04:50
Speaker
And then all of a sudden I'm getting all these adverts in places like, you know, TikTok, X, slash Twitter, and saying things like, oh Lord, the world's coming out. It's like, it's annoying next week. Like, where were you? i think oh well we've goingdoor Obviously what happened was all the great marketing for Red One to go. Clearly, yeah. Absolutely. Everyone's been talking about Red One, so nobody's gotten to see it. Yeah, bulky. yeah Love. Santa with muscles. I loved J.K. Simmons. I loved Red One, by the way. I know this isn't the point of this, but I what i want everyone to know this. My faux weapons don't count for everything, because I love Red One.
00:05:25
Speaker
a slight side tangent, but I remember Adam and I were doing the, I think it was the episode for Terminator Genesis where J.K. Simmons is in it. And he was like, oh look up a picture of J.K. Simmons now. And I'm like, oh my God, he wants like a buff Santa. I didn't know it was for a red one. But anyway, that's next week's review clearly. But yeah, this film kind of shadow dropped to be honest. I mean, there was a wee shadow, but nevertheless, you know, it kind of slowly came out. And the only reason, you know, shout out to Andrew here, but the only reason we are sitting in a card right now. Thank you, Andrew. The reason is because Andrew was saying, oh, why don't we do that for the finale of the year? And I was like, oh, absolutely fantastic idea. I can't wait for it to come out in streaming services. too much of course I soon realised and so did my wallet. Yes it is indeed out at the cinema for this weekend really and it's not a lot of time because I'm going to be honest when I say to you do you want to go out and do you want to watch this film on the I think it's the 13th that came out here and I was like oh do you want to go watch it you're like no I can't because of reasons and I was like oh that means we can't can't see it at all. So I genuinely don't realise it was for the whole weekend. That's how poor this has been. Honestly, it has been absolutely, it has been terrible. I'm not going to lie, it has been absolutely horrific. But then we came to see it. And I'm going to be honest, despite the haters, despite the look-warm reviews, and this is kind of my general overview, but I would personally say it actually is a fair effort. it's not a bad film. It's not anything like the original trilogy because let's face it, I'm going to be honest here, if you're making anything Lord of the Rings it's going to be compared to that high standard. You're not going to get a film where they're going to be like, oh it's as good as Lord of the Rings, like no way. Never. That's kind of the curse of Lord of the Rings. Everything they've done since those films, everyone's going, oh, it's good, but it's not Lord of the Rings. That will be that franchise forever. It definitely comes with Lord of the Rings. People are going to compare it to that.
Target Audience Analysis: LOTR vs. Anime Fans
00:07:27
Speaker
No matter how good it is. And I think this film has a lot riding against it. I really enjoyed it. I haven't seen it twice. I actually enjoyed it more the second time. But this film's got a lot of riding against it in that you have to pretty much bang on the middle. There's Venn diagram. of people that like anime and people that like Lord of the Rings. You know what I mean? So I think if you really like Lord of the Rings, when I'll tell a quick story, but if you really like Lord of the Rings, you're probably not gonna like this because there's a lot of in it that goes up against the Lord of the Rings. So spoilers for later in the film, but there's a bit where the character who is super buff and really jacked and kind of my hero fights a troll one on one, barefisted and kills it and the guy sitting three seats along when he stood up left and never came back.
00:08:03
Speaker
i love that because i have to say i noticed you'd gone out at one point in the film and then i saw a couple of seats along they had laid and they just never came back and i was like i wonder why but i didn't realize it was that scene exactly he knew he left i have no idea why that was the cutting point but that was it oh that is so funny But yeah, if you like Lord of the Rings, you're probably not going to like this. And if you're obsessed with anime, you're probably not going to like this. You know, i because it's not like a very anime anime. Yeah. So that's my kind of main gripe with, I have to say, like overall, I'm going to say I enjoyed it. The thing about the criticisms for these films, because I have to say a lot of them saying about the animation and things like that, some of it's warranted. But then, of course, you've got the stereotypical people saying, oh, why is it an anime girl? You know, girl boss and blah, blah, blah. know, all the rubbish that you would usually get in the internet. So you're kind of looking for a balanced opinion on it. And then when you go and actually watch it, you go, actually, for the most part, it is relatively balanced. I mean, there's obviously embellishments because it's anime. And to be honest, if they didn't do this, and I think this is something, ironically enough, I think I brought up in the Grinch episode the moment. where I love it see when an animation actually takes advantage of the fact it's animated because the amount of films that we've watched and you know it's animated and they try to apply real life physics to it they don't really say was supposed yeah exactly so I have to say I can
00:09:48
Speaker
You know what I mean? And then, like, there's characters in it who are splitting images of the characters in The Lord of the Rings, so there's one guy that looks a lot like Bernard Hill, the guy that when they fight the offalants, there's kind of the appreciated it for war people that at on times. that, and they have the exact same painting, the exact same weapons, and a lot of the same people in The Lord of the Rings.
Plot Overview: Journey and Revenge in Focus
00:10:05
Speaker
And I get they want to do it because they want to tie in with Lord of the Rings, but I actually wish they'd done more weird stuff, because you might as well. My sort of two highlights of the film was the offalant fight scene at the start, because that was very weird, very ghibliess, you know, in it. And to get there and watch it in the water thing to fight it at the end, it doesn't look like it does in the film. It looks kind of weird and like a Final Fantasy creature. And my second sort of favourite scene is when she meets the eagle at the top of the mountain. And again, that's very much presented like a Ghibli-esque. It's so overbearingly huge. It looks ridiculous. But that's what I want from anime. That's why I'm here. I'm not here for things to look normal. I want it to look cool. Yeah, because I mean going slightly back to what I was saying about the Rings of Power, where a lot of it I think people are put off because I mean, I think because the main characters are elves at times, so they are doing the more fantastical things, which doesn't always translate well to live action. Whereas for this, of course, you've got so many highlights. and they are so cool. Again, as I said, maybe not the best that Walter Rinks has put out, but it is a really, really decent watch and to go even further back to talk about what this film's actually about, it's as you were saying, it's a very obscure bit of lore when they say, oh, we've got the son of King Helm and such a cool name.
00:11:24
Speaker
to say. Yeah, King Helm and he's got his two sons and his daughter who's a bit wild and she doesn't play by the rules. The kind of stereotypical thing. The only thing I would say I don't like about that character is just the hair. And I know that sounds really weird to say, but if they were going to make her, you know, right-headed, make her ginger. Don't tease us like that. Oh yeah she's the only character with red hair and I know a lot of people were complaining for completely different reasons going oh there's no red hair and this you know lineage and blah blah blah and it's like well to be fair maybe Helm had red hair? Maybe the Mum had red hair? I kind of get that but at the same time you probably had to have someone standing out. My thing would be I actually wished more of the characters looked like her yeah like that would be my thing is I think everyone else was too grounded in Lord of the Rings. You know what I mean? There's only one other character that I think stands out at all and it's in terms of like that kind of thing and it's the old woman that's like the bookkeeper and she looks like a... I don't want to always keep saying Ghibli but that's like the code of most of my anime novels and she looks like one of the Ghibli witches. She has this like big bulbous nose. I was getting the sense of the nose! Yeah yeah yeah and she's under this hood and like she's the only other captain this whole thing that's like oh yeah you were made for this that you weren't written from a note set a note sometimes. You were completely thrown up from scratch. If you don't like this character, then you've got to have a bad time because the whole story centers around her where we are following her story about her father essentially getting into a brawl with one of his lords that swears fealty to him and then says, Oh no, actually you suck. And then they suck. Yeah.
00:12:55
Speaker
And then of course the brawl happens, he ends up, and again spoilers going forward, but eventually he ends up getting killed, not the kind the guy he fights with, and then that sparks a war between an outcast versus the family of Helm which You know, it's a pretty basic set up, I have to say. Like a pretty basic revenge plot. Some people might not think it's very Lord of the Rings-esque, but you know what? It's a side story. It does its job. That's what I'm saying. There's a lot of stupid decisions, I would say, but nothing that's too outlandish, if you know what I mean, in terms of the plot. Yeah, it reminds me a lot of that Star Wars-y thing where it's like you just do a really basic plot so you can play about with everything else. Yeah, pretty much. And that's kind of the great thing about this film, that it's so basic in terms of its plot that it can afford to do those kind of things, you know? That it can decide to have a fist-right with Ork. And I just want to point out, I don't know where the budget went in this film because, to be honest, I think the budget probably went to animating King Khelms titanium bowls. because he is by far a one of the least Lord of the Rings type characters and be one of my favourite characters of all time now. I was howling at the beginning because as I said it begins with all the lords coming to see him and then one of the lords from is it Dunlin comes along and he's big and fat and gross the films works not mine and he comes over and says oh I want the throne and then he
00:14:24
Speaker
punches this guy three times, he does not flinch, and he punches this guy once, and he is down for the count. I'm going to say it's not the biggest thing. This is what I picked up on the second time watching. They do in one throwaway line mention that he's got ancient blood, and I think that's supposed to be like the numino, but like what Aragon is. But Aragon was not built like this man. This man is like the personification of Nardwin. It's like, what a fine funny way to run this. You see him beside other people.
00:14:52
Speaker
And I kept whispering this to you throughout the phone, but I went, what an absolute unit! But I just, the scenes kept coming, you know, he punches that guy one shot, he ends up getting killed.
Character Analysis and Fight Scene Humor
00:15:02
Speaker
Oh, not killed, sorry, he ends up getting shot. With like, 10 arrows and he's fine.
00:15:07
Speaker
It's all right, Boromir could never, you know. This guy is a hero, he is a judge. And then later on we get quite possibly two of the best scenes in the film. One where he fights the orcs, of course, and he fights the massive crow. What I loved, and I don't know if you heard me gasp in the cinema, was when he beats up the other orcs and I'm like, oh, that is cool. And this guy leaps in the air and this guy pumps something and goes, oh.
00:15:33
Speaker
breaks off the horn and everything and what I was howling that was again to get back into Helm's sleep later on they have to run there and as soon as he grabbed the door I thought there is no way this guy's gonna solo he kind of doesn't but I mean they probably could the reason the reason he dies is he's so wide he can't fit through the door like that Because look at his daughter! His daughter's like a young woman compared to him! He opens the two doors of Hell's Deep, maybe like a foot wide into his daughter's foot, and he's like, nah, I need to open another six foot, my shoulder's so broad! You're gonna have to carve a moment! I'm gonna have to take a range! He's so wide. Oh, he's so bold. I would have loved to have seen him just walking round town deep, kind of fitting with the normal geography of that place. See honestly, see after jumping, he probably could have taken like two jumps to get over the wall. I mean, this guy is built differently and I was absolutely hell and sea against world wars, but eventually when we see him wait to rest, he's like wait to rest in like a dignified way. He's got that all night buzz going on. But you know what it is, it's you know that meme that keeps going around slash scene from Dragon Ball and then a word off the heels of Dragon Ball. But you know that one from the last film Wrath of the Dragon where it's like Super Sentry Goku and he's got the fist in the air. That's the exact pose. The guy's frozen to death. And he's got a smile on his face. And oh, I knew I had tears in my eyes. I was like, why do people hate this film? People who hate this film haven't watched this film. That's all I'm going to say. This is peak cinema. Anyway, that was the end of the review. I don't know what else to talk about. No, jokes aside, I genuinely, I thought he was one of the higher rights. And I suppose this is a good time to talk about the characters. I mean, Will, for whatever his name was, he was a serviceable antagonist. He was there, kind My favourite thing about Wolf is that he makes all these terrible decisions and it's just because he's really angry. It's really funny, like that's a plot point. Any plot hole that you can come up with his plan is just because he's an idiot. Yeah, because I love visit General Teague or something. Yeah, maybe he's like, so it's clearly a trap. I accept your fate! That happens three times in the film. Every time that General goes, don't do this one thing, he goes, do you know what I'm gonna do? That's the exact thing.
00:17:50
Speaker
as well it's just like I see what you're saying but thanks thanks my right hand man shut up i'm gonna let you finish but wolf is like who i actually am when i think i'm hammer him i mean even this stature i could believe it this whole thing i'm up with one At the very beginning, of course, Wilf gets angry that his dad was laid out
Critiquing Character Decisions and Plot Balance
00:18:13
Speaker
flat by this beast of a man and he just grabs him with one hand and pulls him up as if he's drinking a keg or something. I was like, who is this guy? This utter, as I said, unit of Rohan. That's what this film should have been called. Unit of Rohan. The units of Rohan. See, as soon as he died, the film should have just ended there, to be honest. But in all seriousness, going back to the characters, you've got Wilf, Hera, I actually liked her. I have to say I thought she was a really good character and a really good main character as well because I think obviously people seeing this as an anime they saw the red hair they thought oh my god she's gonna be you know this Wonder Woman of thing yeah she was just a normal person to be honest yeah I've got no notes. Do you? Yeah, that's great. The protagonist starts off, like she gets the sort of hero's journey thing, like she doesn't want to be part of the crew and eventually has to and she rebels against nobility and accepts it. You know, the usual stuff and it's good. Again, it's basic plot. She's probably got the most basic through line of the whole film, but she's just there to have a good time and do some action. sequences because that's the thing that I have to admit although there was like a lot of over the top action things like that which again glad they took advantage of that for the anime you know there was nothing too unrealistic about any of the action to be obviously other than that obviously other than that but you know for the most part the actual grounded action was really good and as you were saying the shield maiden she was great the I mean was that a child
00:19:35
Speaker
his halfway through or towards the end of the film, I was like, is he meant to be a hobbit? So my wife thinks it was supposed to catch people to think it was a hobbit. You know, I mean, like in a branding thing. I kind of agree with that. I think yeah because he was done up to look a bit like Samwise with a blonde hair. Quite broken stuff. no offense Yeah, because there was a lot of moments that I genuinely don't know how to feel about with that, where there was a lot of callbacks. You know, there was obviously the amateur music. There was the name drops at the end. Yeah, I want to talk about that. Yeah. So let's go for that. They did like a double duty cameo at the end, so they had... Yeah, I was always surprised at that. Yeah, they had Chris Philly's archival voices as Saruman, and he popped in and he basically said one line which they'd got from a video game recording or something. It's like the Mr. Bunt. Hello. You're quite good at running, Rohan.
00:20:29
Speaker
never wouldve made like involved
00:20:35
Speaker
I actually don't mind either one of those cameos. I just don't like them back to back. You know what I mean? It feels like you didn't have to do both and I'm not a massive fan of like the archival audio And I know it's nice to pay tribute to Chris Lee and stuff and I do accept that but I just wouldn't have bothered. You know, I just would have done the Gandalf review or even just put the letter on the screen and you didn't have to say my name. One of those where it's like, oh that's a wee funny nod but that was like, it was two, two always ones back to back and I didn't enjoy that as much. No, it reminded me of the end of the Hobbit. Not the end where it's actual elbow and the hobbit hole and things like that. I love that. That you know, the girl finds Strider and
00:21:12
Speaker
And the sting of the music hits the exact moment. Yeah. And then both of them, with Saruman going, leave Saruman to me. You know, like that kind of thing. You're like, oh, we know what's going to happen. I wish she just, with her chill maiden, I wish she just kind of rolled off into the sunset kind of thing, because I really did enjoy both those characters. But yeah, now they're tied to the wider ward of the rings there. It's a bit like, and again, I'll keep this rant very brief, but it's kind of the problem that I have with a lot of Star Wars stuff nowadays where ah they have to link it to a legacy character. You can't have the Mandalorian going off without running into Ahsoka Tano or you know any of these others. I know it's a spoiler for the Mandalorian, but it always has to link to somebody and it's a bit similar to this. And I thought, you know, maybe bumped into Gandalf and a pup. I don't know. Yeah, I'm totally with you there. I do feel as if it was a little bit off. yeah Also, it was a little bit awkward because it was clear they only had that one line of audio. It was something like, I'm proud to serve you. And then that was it. And there was that awkward pause at the end where you're like, oh. That was the pause for applause. Yeah, so people could go, wow. Yeah, did you not hear the guy in the back? who know That was just me. That was me popping up. I was going to say, the guy who left, he came back with his face. Look to my first coming. as well oh no Can we talk about the animation
Animation Quality: Landscape Praise vs. Character Design
00:22:30
Speaker
now? Go for it. I'm a bit mixed, I have to say. I think, and I don't know how you feel about this scene at twice now, I think that initially, see the landscapes and the setting? Gorgeous. You could slap that on a wallpaper. Honestly, you could frame it and put it up on your wall. But, who carried?
00:22:46
Speaker
Do you know what the characters felt like? I felt like you're those old cartoons where it was like an interactable part of it. It always looked different because obviously it was like a layer on top of it. But when it wasn't interactable, so it's like you kind of knew what door they were going to open before they did. And that's what it kind of felt like with these characters that they were imposed in these gorgeous landscapes and things like that. I think it kind of felt like a lot of anime films where the budget never gets divided equally. like It never does matter. Especially when you see it on like such a big screen that we did and it was like every so often a character standing in the background they just have no face. And no, that's what happens in anime. The faces can't be as detailed far away, it just looks like two dots now. But like it's so off-putting when they're so big and funny. If you watched it on a tiny telly, I'm sure it'll be fine if you watch it on your phone. You know I mean? minutes When a film's so big, and the main character, yeah know she gets a scar on her face at one point and it's there for like the next 10 minutes of film. Oh yeah, then it disappears. And it disappears, but it also disappears within that 10 minutes, on and off again because the camera keeps zooming out and losing it. So the scene keeps zooming out. That kind of stuff really gets to me like there. And i again, it's very common, a lot of anime films, or some of the older anime's do it all the time. I hope maybe they get the chance to brush
00:23:58
Speaker
through it again in post i don't know if they will but some someone who some i know some films do that but yeah there's a lot of drops in quality and particularly right at the start those looks a really weird way to put your best foot forward but after that lovely that intro sequence with the sea giant mountains and all that and it zooms in on her for the first time in her face there's like two dots on her smile Even before that though, I genuinely, when they zoom into the map and everything they do, the lovely narration and things, and then I genuinely at the beginning I was like, is this actually real life mountains or things? Initially I genuinely couldn't tell when they were going through. And then that whole illusion was spoiled by showing the arsecrack of two eagles. And I was like, oh, oh no. And as I said, Rohan, you're doing great. I'm Steve for the Hornberg, whatever you want to say. All of the places were absolutely fantastic. The setting as I said, absolutely gorgeous, but it's just a shame for the characters. And again, I don't think they look bad per se, but I genuinely, I don't know if it is just bad animation or it's just because the background's so good. Do you know what I mean? It's kind of that stylist It's when a lot of anime uses CG elements, I've always felt that. In some anime, just for example, I've done my head attack on Titan, gets away with it because everything does look weird in that universe. So when they do have something CG or it's not terrible, maybe the best examples for them are Alchemist. They have the bit with Envy, turns into this big beast and that's all CGI and that's brilliant because it's supposed to look creepy and weird and this is supposed to look quite realistic. So it looks terrible. It's so much more off-putting when you get that animation gap. I definitely felt it in this film. that's something that I have to say my partner and I recently when they've been watching anime and there's that kind of blend of CGI and traditional animation and you think, ah, did you really have to do that? It's really, really off-putting. And again, it's not the worst at times, but it's definitely noticeable enough. And they always use it for the people in the distance, like the hill tribes and things like that, when they're standing outside the walls, they're like, oh, look at us. And I genuinely thought they were going to do the Game of Thrones thing where they all ride out and then you just seen nothing from the battle. But I was like, oh, thank God, they've got a blue colour palette this time. Yeah, it was a bit of a hit or miss. Can we talk about it? The Siege Tower. Yeah. This is phenomenal. Yeah. Oh, can I just say, when I saw what the Siege Tower actually was, I turned around to you and I said, they are so lucky that this works out because, my God. I'm going to say one thing. A lot of people who have seen this film are going to say the Siege Tower doesn't make any sense. Why did they not just use a catapult? Or a ladder. Or a ladder. And I'm gonna refer you back to my earlier point of which this guy's a dumb idiot. So the seat shower that he makes is basically a ramp, a giant ramp that goes up for absolutely ages and then falls over and it should break. There's no logs that are strong enough to hold whatever this thing is. It is the funniest thing and it's so non-sexual. Lord of the Rings has catapults and trebuchets at some point in the world. You know, I don't know, maybe they don't get invented till like 10 years after this film, who knows? Well, no, they did. So remember they had like the big arrow. They got one of those, but like, you know what I mean? Like they don't have like a championship or the kind of siege. Maybe, but like this was not the best call. Like the thing that makes me laugh about this so much is like during the last fight, it gets set on fire and it's just done. It's like that was like eight months of production down the drain. People die to make that.
00:27:14
Speaker
It's like, that was your best foot forward. Because I kept thinking this through my head because obviously they couldn't blow it up because that was like a relatively, I can't believe I'm nerd and out here at this, but it's a relatively new invention by the time the urakaya are there and the urakaya are very industrial, so it makes sense. And then I thought, well, maybe they just didn't have, you know, the ladders and things because again, you know, mass produced industrial, they didn't need hundreds of ladders. They needed a few lads. What are you doing?
00:27:42
Speaker
And a couple of archers to keep them off. Yeah, but again, like I'm going to say that this guy who made this plan was a complete idiot, so actually I'm fine with it. Yeah. All I'll say is ah bar the main character, which is the ironic thing, because usually in something like this, the main character is the one that's like an extreme. They're either too good at their job or they just suck completely, whereas the kind in the middle, because one scene that I did love was when she confronts one of the E-traitor lovers in the horse case, and they're so it had some words. And then I was laughing to get, oh, wouldn't it be so funny? Has that horse just hit him again? And it does. I was like, oh my god. Well, they actually did it, the mad lad. But with the king, he's you know the complete other end of, I cannot be beat by a mortal man. No man can kill me. Whereas on the other side of it, you've got this dumb ass.
00:28:35
Speaker
And again, it's like it's supposed to be a tragic pair of children who grew up together and then they drifted up apart on their crowns of love, bla blah, blah, blah. No, it's just eventually I get what they were going for, but it just turns into a dumbass. I love him. No, I'm good for this. Honestly, more
Humorous Commentary on Plot Logic and Siege Scene
00:28:50
Speaker
more villains need to be dumb. It seems like the kind of He needed the nemesis. He was the henchman left on his own. You see if he was just left on his own devices, what the hell? they have done I genuinely do not know. This guy, I am surprised can tie his own true laces. He probably can. I am the king of rollerrope. Careful. Careful. Yeah, that was his big Garan plan. His machinations over eight months. Instead was like, we should just buy a car park. No. what Yeah. And what was how that was, I was like, this is going to be a really cool tower. You know, a bit like, I know it's not a tower, but like groans from. Yeah. I was expecting something like that, like a bat and ram. Or even like the tower that they have is at Helms Depot. I can't remember if it's Helms Depot.
00:29:40
Speaker
That's what I thought, because that's a traditional siege tower. It's got ladder up the middle, you've got the three walls there. I totally haven't played loads of medibos. I was expecting that. That would have been so much easier than getting the bulk of your army to pull a rope. I'd also kill one guy for the sake of it. I don't know how the game was, but good for him. And where was the rest of the army there? Because what I was laughing at was, even if something went down and you saw two guards or something like guiding people out, it was like, they must be the happiest soldiers in the world. I'd be like, thank God, I'm not in the front line. So let's go, kids. Let's go. That was rather silly. And again, there's the kind of spectrum here. There's good silly, and then there's bad silly. Good silly is hell. I would actually say most of this film was good, silly. I've actually got a slightly controversial opinion, that's what I'm going to say. I wish this film was slightly longer, which is a very unusual take for me because I hate films being long. I most famously think Oppenheimer was too long. But there was a couple of characters who came in and then were suddenly part of the crew and there was never really mention. So like the wee squire boy, he went from just being there to like, he actually seemed to be running part of Helms Deep by the end of it. And you're like the chief navigator for some reason. me and my job. And then the wee old woman that was like the... No, not her, the one that was the... Yeah, Ghibli knows. Yeah, Ghibli knows. The keeper of the books. She went from being an annoyance to getting a big heartfelt hug at the end. There was a lot of time spent where you guys made friends and there was just a couple of bits like that where there was some jumps in the character progression, the scenes and stuff. Like this, that film actually could have either been a TV show or three hours and I actually would probably have got more out of it. It was just stuff I wish was there. No, I actually agree with you, I have to say. And sorry, just before I go on to agree with you, one thing I want to talk about with the Ghibli women is, see when she comes in and she's like, oh, the stores are very low. And it's like, you're the only one who loves you. Do you not think I'm topping them up? Have you been
00:31:35
Speaker
so like Yeah, a broom inside a sweep of Jesus. I really don't need to be putting this fire on in summer. After that, I saw that big wall of logs. I was like, that won't last the winter. I'm like, what are you feeling? Hell's moving castle? I was like, come on. I also have like no concept of how many logs does it take to feel a castle. I would say the same. They look to this massive wall about maybe four helms, I would say. I mean, I would have heated two helms easily. Yeah. And they're like, this won't be enough for the winter. Here's what you do. Block the windows, gather in the same room. Right. So I appreciate that there was some stylistic tricks. Yeah. And my favorite one was a helm when he was on his sick bed. He was put next to an open window, but it's not like a window was in glass. It was like a stone hole in the snowblowing at one point. It's like, put the blanket into gas. Like, moving back from the window slightly.
00:32:28
Speaker
yeah that was a that was a choice i have to say i mean i know he's so muscular that he doesn't get a few of the cold but even still just bring him in from the window like i mean that's how he dies he ends up freezing together but they all might pose now it's your turn her he wasn't cold though yeah it was physics stopped him not him The plot has stopped. But no, I totally agree with you. I genuinely, after watching this, I would actually say that I would love to see more of it, either of this film or of other stories in this format. Because I was thinking, oh, wouldn't it be cool to see like a Gondor story? Don't know about a Mordor story, because we've already they had heaps of that with the One Ring and the whole Lord of the Ring. But you know, there's so much potential there. And again, I'm not saying that in the case of, oh, the Warner Brothers milk it for all it's worth.
00:33:15
Speaker
But at the same time, you know, if they've got a story to tell or they just want to explore that, then
Standalone Qualities and Independence from LOTR
00:33:21
Speaker
go for it. I think that's a big thing. and i I really like that this wasn't, I know that we did mention about Gandalf and Saravan being in it, but I did like it wasn't a direct prequel sequel tie and whatever, because the trailer was playing in the cinema for Mifasa and that's something that just doesn't interest me. at all. no Same with all these Star Wars films where it's like every Star Wars thing seems to take place in the same 100 year gap. yeah Even though it's an infinitely big universe and all the Avengers stuff, it's all tied in. I like things to be familiar, but I don't need it to hold my hand the whole time. yeah And this was like a good mix of, okay, now I recognise that, I can point and go and that's that thing that I know, but it's its own story. I don't need to have remembered Lord of the Rings to watch it. You know what I mean? There's all sorts of things in it. It's like, this is fine. It can stand on its own. And then we've watched that film. We can completely forget about it. We don't need to know about these characters again. And that's fine. And I'm happy with that because so many of these films now I'm like every time a character comes on screen I'm like do I have to know who this person is in advance and I was supposed to watch two TV series and anime in a book before I got here. Again it's like it would probably help if you had a basic knowledge of the Lord of the Rings during the and everything but at the same time it's not necessary. As you said, this is definitely a standalone film and barely maybe what, five minutes of the film? Yeah, you could easily watch this film and go out happy. And honestly, that's really the summary of this. It's a good film. It's a good standalone piece of Lord of the Rings media. Was it necessary? I wouldn't say so to be honest, but at the same time, I'm not really offended that it's there, you know, or I never really felt bored. I think that's the main thing because the one thing that, and I think you've said this in the past as well, the one total sin that I felt I can do is just be boring. yeah and be unengaging, uninteresting, nobody cares about it. That is the worst thing a film can do because it will will die in people's memories. You know, no one will care about it. And then when they dig it up, they won't be bothered. Whereas for this one, it had some really memorable moments. yeah Like as much as we laughed about it, they had the stupid siege tower or ramp. They had King Helm just absolutely beating people with these fists, which I absolutely loved when they reiterated that. To be fair, that the the siege tower also led to the best fight in the film as well, which is when she's wearing the wedding dress. yeah flying over the shore and she's like, you get the guy's like, oh, who are you a bride to? And she's like, I'm a bride to death. And they're like, let's go. And I'm like, I'm popping off. And it's like, can't laugh. So that's what he's going to say to me, because I'll start getting up and shouting at the screen. yeah yeah I'm like the old glamour of the back. Yeah, it's true. I could get back. I was just saying the complete side tangent, not even related to the phone, but I didn't know he said were the people in the phone. Like, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, I, Yeah, that one. For any habitual fans out there, I'm so sorry. You know, the ring theme, you know, and then it had the narration and it had the big swelling in the music and it was all triumphant. I wish I could say I enjoyed that bit, but I couldn't hear it over the sound of rustling papers. It was the loudest packet of Chris ever opened.
00:36:15
Speaker
I was getting that surround sound, I was getting on the left, I was getting from behind, they were surrounding us. I do have to apologise because I kind of feel like added to that. We were watching in our cinema where there's electric moving chairs, so we both were playing. And I had to go to the toilet but halfway through and it's this really quiet emotion of seeing here's my chair going neeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Do you mind? Yes. If we're in the screens tonight I'm going to look at me and I'm not a young man, I can't get out of a chair without getting help man. Yeah, that's why we have to pay extra for the cinema now. It's very ageist, podium fixtures that normally you'll get out of it. But legal reasons that as a joke. But yeah, no, it's loud. Maybe it's me getting older, I don't know, but I was just like, this is loud as hell. Other than my age rants and that. What are your final thoughts about this film?
00:37:02
Speaker
But yeah, I really enjoyed it. Like I said, I've seen it twice in two days now and I actually even enjoyed it even more the second time. Really good. It's not going to go down as the greatest Lord of the Rings film ever because like we said, the Lord of the Rings trilogy is pretty the greatest films ever made. But I really enjoyed it. I can see why it's a hard sell to people but if you are in that niche that likes the same kind of crap that we do, then you're going to love this. Thank you, Pandora, for watching.
Final Thoughts and Recommendations
00:37:26
Speaker
that's pretty good fun and i would probably watch it for a third team not tomorrow i'm gonna think about go take a break don't have to see it three sequential days an ok monday of course Yeah, that's something we didn't actually mention. I have to say over all the English dub is... Very good. I'm going to be honest, is it right Miranda Otto, the one who plays Eowyns or not? Yes, she's a narrator. Is she an artist? And the two orcs were Mary and Pippin. Where are they? Oh, that would explain why they were so Scottish. Because I was like, they are the most Scottish sounding. but I loved it. Yeah, my Scottish bias. But no, the voice acting and everything, that was good as well. Honestly, yeah, I would recommend this film in all seriousness. I think it was such a good effort on everybody's part. And as you were saying, it may not be the best Lord of the Rings film, but at the end of the day, you know, you can't really hold a candle to the original trilogy. I think it will take something really special to smash to do that in the solder and everything to usurp it. But at the same time, you know, if you're an anime fan, if you're a Lord of the Rings fan, as long as you don't mind orcs being punched in the face by a big muscly man like my hero academia, Popo, honestly. Honestly, it's a fantastic film and I cannot wait to discuss this film with Andrew. I feel like he's going to be the complete opposite of this take. I cannot wait to hear what he has to say genuinely, because I think as of recording this, he is going to see it with his wife. So it'll be so interesting to hear what he has to say. And yeah, that will indeed be the last episode of 2024's run of Chatsunami. So Martin, thank you so much for coming all the way out here into my card in the middle of a basketball. Thank you, and I'll probably have to go rescue my car from the parking wardens that are coming round. Yes, yes. So, before we wrap up, where can the lovely listeners at home, not sitting in their cars, find your content? No matter where you are, except if you're driving, but if you are sitting in your car, and your car is stationary and the engine is turned off, you can find me across all the social medias by me on the post on Instagram, at Martin Vicalaster, or you can find me on Facebook, TikTok, X, Blue Sky. I think that's them all. There's a lot of social media these days. Find me across those and also if you are in the Glasgow area you can see me wrestling and I'm expanding more and more so just keep an eye out and I'll see you soon. And buy that chit-ing. You can hear in the back of it. That's right, we love Chatsanami. Toot if you love Chatsanami. For legal reasons do not toot randomly. If you love Chatsanami. Because I swear to god it'll be like there's been an uptake in the Glasgow people. Toot for Chatsanami. Yeah. I chacked toot for Chatsanami. No, don't get that trending. No, do not toot for me. But yeah, if you would like to check out more of our episodes from 2024, as well as our upcoming review of One of the Rehiram, probably a little bit more subdued, but we'll probably no doubt have a hilarious skit in there. Then you can indeed check us out our website, Chatsanami.com, as well as all good podcast apps. And as Martin was saying, we're also on all these social medias. We're on Twitter slash X. At ChatsanamiPod, we are on Blue Sky as well. At Chatsanami, we are on
00:40:34
Speaker
Not really, everything. Instagram, Facebook, YouTube. Pretty much where your grandparents post us, I suppose. Yeah, blue sky is better. So yeah, feel free to check us out over there. But I just want to thank our amazing Pantalurian patrons, Robotic Battle Toaster, Sonia and Ghosty. Thank you so, so much for supporting the show. And if you would like more... but in the scenes content and more tutting for Chat Tsunami then you can check us out over our Patreon page patreon.com forward slash chat tsunami but until next time thank you all so so much for listening to this and thank you so much for sticking with us this year in 2024. As always stay safe, stay awesome, stay hydrated and a very happy new year.