Transcript
Zach Sheets: Hello and welcome to the Everything Actioncast podcast week of October 26th. I'm your host Zach.
Chris Prime: And my co -host, Chris.
Zach Sheets: And this week we're putting on our special ghost goggles and talking about 13 Ghosts, which came out 25 years ago this week. It came out on October 26, 2001. And it's a remake of the William Castle classic. from 1960.
Zach Sheets: And it was it was part of a string of kind of remakes and ghost movies that came out in the late 90s or 2000s. the the haunting which was like a new version of uh the haunting of hill house there was a house of haunted hill There was this, and then there was a Ghost Ship.
Zach Sheets: And three of those are from... Dark Castle Entertainment, which was formed to basically remake William Castle movies.
Zach Sheets: And they made two of them, and they gave up. and brook We're just going to make other movies, I guess, now.
Chris Prime: Yeah they tried.
Zach Sheets: We'll be right back.
Chris Prime: Well, yeah, this was...
Zach Sheets: We're going to go ship it.
Chris Prime: Yeah, like, it it wasn't... Giant blockbusters, as I guess they were banking on.
Zach Sheets: I mean, they had like Joel Silver and Robert Zemeckis behind it. Like they were like the guys that founded like Dark Castle.
Chris Prime: Yeah, but I think they were aiming for... Like... not Not schlock. to be hot. But... They definitely wanted to keep like budgets.
Chris Prime: Like. small to make the most maximum profit.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: And then.
Zach Sheets: So I got, It's sort of like... like sort of Blumhouse -y a little bit, where it's like... Like.
Chris Prime: Like protobomb health.
Zach Sheets: Mid -year. Yeah.
Chris Prime: I think they wanted to be basically what Blumhouse is now. And it was just, they did. It was. Like this weird moment in... in Cinema. Where. I think if this came onto streaming or something like that, like...
Chris Prime: it It would have been great. I think this this came to like a strict DVD. it would have done like Crazy numbers and rentals?
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Chris Prime: Uh. But. Like... Competing in 2001 is like this weird. error of like 90s movies were sort of being played out and then the 2000s didn't have like an identity yet.
Zach Sheets: Yep.
Chris Prime: So like. Things wanted to be edgy, but no one understood, like, what. Like, it was like no substance.
Zach Sheets: It was just like... Yeah, it was like it was like the new metal aesthetic. And like in like super fast cuts and like flashing lights.
Chris Prime: Yep.
Zach Sheets: That was like the style.
Chris Prime: Yep. And that's why I'm like. Oh, so it just like... if you remove All of that. this movie would be like... An hour long.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: And I think because the original one is like an hour long.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, the original one's like... 84 minutes. So this this one's like a slightly slightly little bit longer. But.
Chris Prime: longer but i mean that's because they they really remove the whole like family like loving family aspect of the movie, and it's more like a tragic family.
Chris Prime: And.
Zach Sheets: And they really, they ratchet up like the lore and like the the plots. They really just like overcomplicate the plot of the new one.
Chris Prime: yeah Yeah. I mean, I... for Every time you think 13 ghosts, you're going to spend more time with the ghosts. and really learn about each one, all 13 of them. But they really don't.
Zach Sheets: You basically...
Chris Prime: It's a little misleading.
Zach Sheets: yeah You just have to go like go off of like, oh. Their look. That's all he basically had to go on. Their look and their their weird like their weird name they have.
Chris Prime: There is. way more. Like. Un... Like... forgotten. documents about the ghosts in this movie or fan, like.
Chris Prime: interviews that Have asked the. producers or like costume designers. who these characters were. Like, what was their backstory?
Zach Sheets: I think I think on the DVD there was like or like. probably in the blu -ray too there's like i think there's a special feature where like f murray abraham just like like ghost it's like the ghost files and like it's just everyone like describing all the ghosts
Chris Prime: And also... I had to remember this came out. Six years after seven.
Zach Sheets: huh
Chris Prime: So they wanted to imitate that. look of a david fincher like creation where everything is like this horrid like You know. Ghosts. Like...
Chris Prime: gore aesthetic. Did you get that vibe? like we're everything looks like industrial for no reason inside this like residential house
Zach Sheets: Yeah, like yeah the house the house is definitely... I don't... i mean i think we I don't know if it's, like, like actually, like, if Murray Abram, like, ever lived there. Like, if he just built this just to be, like, this machine that he built. Because, like, it makes absolutely no sense. And it's, all it's like, all glass. It's just, like, confusing hallways. It's, like, shifting. I don't know how you, like, actually lived there, like, normally. Like, I'm going to go to the bathroom. Oh.
Zach Sheets: The house shifted, all right? I can't go to the bathroom right now.
Chris Prime: I thought the house shift was the basement level, not so much the top level.
Zach Sheets: The whole, I mean, the whole thing, well, I guess, I guess it wouldn't happen until like the mechanisms trips, but it's still, it's still like very, it's like very narrow hall, like glass hallways.
Chris Prime: Yeah, yeah.
Zach Sheets: And it's like. lots lots of data It seems like lots of dead ends. you like you're like It's very confusing like trying to figure out where you're going in that house.
Chris Prime: Well, I mean, it makes sense that if you're like a spiritual person. An occultist, you know how to read the symbols so you know where you're going. I mean, it does make it look maze -like.
Chris Prime: And... But like I think you're right, too. like There's confusing parts about it where... Why would Ephraim and Abraham... Design. certain rooms with like bedrooms If he didn't really live there. like he He had like...
Chris Prime: Victorian style furniture in some rooms.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: He had a whole... Like a... woman's bed set.
Zach Sheets: That was like, that's... like i i could like like Is that when one of the ghosts like killed herself? Or is that just like she's like recreating like the event? like she she like that was somewhere else but she's like just like recreating the event of her like her killing herself
Chris Prime: No idea. Movie doesn't want to explain that.
Zach Sheets: He like him just, like, lured her to his house. just like Yep. It's like, oh, watch you why don't you commit suicide?
Chris Prime: Well, I think. The ghost was... someone else like a tragic thing and then they captured it in a box because It makes it seem like Matthew Lillard, like...
Chris Prime: the psychic like he's been working for fm abraham for i don't know how many how long and the begin the movies is final capture but it's a trick it's not
Zach Sheets: Yeah, you you were mentioning before we started recording, Chris, like this this movie is like... in media it just jumps you in like in media res like we're on like the last ghost that ephraim was trying to catch because he's been like on this mission for years, it seems like, to like catch all these ghosts. these very specific ghost that he needs to catch.
Zach Sheets: For his nefarious plans.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it's like he captured 12 and... For all. We know from that version of the movie, that's the finale. Because it does... feel like a finale to something else.
Zach Sheets: Okay, the opening is like this huge... Like. like set piece with like you know and like this junkyard with like guys getting thrown like through like cars and cars like dropping on people and getting smashed to cars. and
Chris Prime: I mean, I guess that was the ghost team.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, Ephraim is his whole like mercenary like ghost team that has like this whole like all these like electronic... Get... gadgets and stuff. and They have like a special special like ghost containment box. that they have to try to lure the ghost into.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, then and Matthew Lillard is psychic, so he can he can sense the ghosts, and then also he can... if you touch someone, he can like basically like absorb all their life story and see it like in like flashes.
Zach Sheets: And he's also in, like, full, like, Stu Mocker mode. Like, he's just, like, exact the exact same character from Scream, just now he's psychic.
Chris Prime: Yeah. Like. Matthew Lillard. he does put it as all of just like frantic. Pre shaggy kind of. Like rambling and.
Chris Prime: and
Zach Sheets: that That was the next year. He was shaggy the next like 2002.
Chris Prime: I mean, it makes sense. I mean, it's a very Scooby -Doo. lot. That goes on. it's a very If you think about it as like a Scooby -Doo mystery.
Zach Sheets: I mean, there there was literally a show called The 13 Ghosts of Scooby -Doo.
Zach Sheets: I mean, these are these are like much more like grotesque and... horrific than any Scooby -Doo villain but
Zach Sheets: like These are all serial killer ghosts.
Chris Prime: Or, they're it's tragic, because I think not all of them are serial killers. They're just like... They're like ghosts for a reason because they haven't passed on or... That or they...
Zach Sheets: We'll be up.
Chris Prime: The moment of their death, they've just been captured.
Zach Sheets: Well, I think i think Matthew Lillard says like they died in like... horrifically violent fashion and that's that makes them like they're kind of trapped in that moment or like they're that's the why they're still on earth
Zach Sheets: But then it's like... this guy from like, who you know, you know hundreds of years ago predicted that you need to catch that he like knew these ghosts were gonna happen or something and then you have to he predicted you have to catch these certain ghosts to like create this like Demon machine?
Chris Prime: Well, the machine... itself. i think I think he might have created... partial of it, but like... Okay. It tells you the future.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, if if if if it fully works, you can basically like you can look into the past, present, and future.
Chris Prime: But even if it partially works, it could sort of tell you the future, which... i'm I'm confused because... How did the... architect of the machine figure out you need 13 goes of like these calibers And. I don't know if it was like a category ghost or it was like the exact ghost.
Zach Sheets: It was just like, it's like a vague, like find a ghost that kind of fits this description. but then it seems like no it's like you have to find this exact this person Like this ghost. person you have to find them
Chris Prime: See, I always understood it as these are the kind of categories that ghosts need to capture, that power of the machine.
Zach Sheets: Well, it's like it's the dark Zodiac. So it's like it's like they're each it's instead of like. Taurus or sedentary or something. It's like, What was it like? like the first The first son. The torso. The Bound Woman.
Zach Sheets: It's very like tarot, too. It's like it's like like tarot cards.
Chris Prime: Yeah. Yeah I see that. Yeah.
Zach Sheets: The hangman.
Chris Prime: that
Zach Sheets: like
Chris Prime: I mean, again, it wants to be edgy without like. really understanding it or explaining it.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Zach Sheets: But then like the the big twist in the opening is that. So they're trying to catch this ghost, and it's like, oh no, F. Marie Abraham got killed catching this ghost. He's dead.
Zach Sheets: So then his... a strange nephew or his like long lost nephew Tony Shalhoub. inherits his his crazy house.
Zach Sheets: And Tony Shalhoub has his own tragedy because... it's kind of like It's kind of like a wild like opening where it's like... It's a it's. A montage? You don't... You only hear it via audio.
Zach Sheets: You just hear like, it's like. kind of moving through this this house and you just hear like this like horrible like fire happened
Chris Prime: Well, you hear you hear like a loving family slowly. one day. And. Just like... the remnants of that. Happy family. so like go full circle into Uh...
Chris Prime: Just like a sad. Tony. Shalhoub Blake. financial ruin.
Zach Sheets: i feel I feel like that was missing like a shit like the the house the house that they were kind of like... Like. Moving through the sheer like sheer like slick got burned and turned to ash or something?
Chris Prime: That's too fancy.
Zach Sheets: Like i just like a cool like transition.
Chris Prime: I mean I think That's still a little light ways away. for it to be Easy to do.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Uh... But. Yeah, that that makes sense, but the whole thing was to show... That like. this guy can't is like, you know, haunted.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Zach Sheets: and yeah it so it's they they did have this it's like you know this nice house like The... His wife died. but now Now they're in this kind of like crappy apartment. it But then, I don't understand.
Zach Sheets: They have enough money to pay for like, it seems like a live -in nanny.
Chris Prime: Yeah, that weird, right?
Zach Sheets: I don't know. Tony Shalhoub at one point later on says, we literally have no money. I have no money. I'm a math teacher. like We lost all our money in the fire. But then he can pay for Maggie.
Zach Sheets: Who's played by like. like hip hop artists.
Chris Prime: Raw digger.
Zach Sheets: Rod Digger.
Zach Sheets: Who was in like Busta Rhymes, like the flip flip mode so squad. yeah
Chris Prime: Yeah, that's something I did not know when I saw the movie, and then I had like looked that up. like recently and be like, who was that?
Zach Sheets: Mhm. And of course she goes she does the end credits song. Like a mirror mirror.
Chris Prime: Oh, it's her.
Zach Sheets: Yup.
Chris Prime: I'm surprised she doesn't. Does she do a song called like 13 Ghosts?
Zach Sheets: yeah's not like I think the other song is like... there's like a song called like exalted or something and it's like tricky with like alias morissette vocals on the background. And that's the one that got like the the music video.
Zach Sheets: Like, ro ro Rod Duggan didn't get, like, the music video song.
Chris Prime: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: Which is weird.
Zach Sheets: and then but then it's like she's a nanny but it seems like she's like not doing any nanny work she's just like hanging out
Chris Prime: I thought it was like a neighbor.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. yeah
Zach Sheets: Yeah, like their kooky neighbor was like, no. They're paying her to be at their house. And she's just there in curlers. She can't cook breakfast, apparently. Shannon Elizabeth has to cook breakfast.
Chris Prime: Yeah, Tony Shula's just bad with money and like people.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: i't I don't... quite understand how uh like i one i get why they're having financial money they're like supporting like a third kid
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: but like Paying for mec for like a playmate for like his son.
Chris Prime: An expensive, like... like play pal like it
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: I mean, I get it, but... like It would have been funny during that montage, like... She's introduced during that like you hear the voice like I'm going to take care of you.
Chris Prime: And Tony she was like, You have to feed my son. like
Zach Sheets: I need help. I can't take care of i can't take care of everybody.
Chris Prime: it's like Hi, I'm Maggie. I don't cook. I don't clean. Yeah. I want.
Zach Sheets: He's...
Chris Prime: Weekends off.
Zach Sheets: she's She's like a worse day than like Fran Drescher was.
Chris Prime: Well, yeah. like No, the nanny was good. i i give fran dresser's nanny was that like she was like not high society but She at least could take care of him.
Zach Sheets: she Yeah, she was actually...
Chris Prime: I don't know if she could.
Zach Sheets: like I don't think she cooked, but yeah, she was, like, taking care of the... like She was, like actually like, doing... some nanny things.
Chris Prime: She was, like, involved with their life and helping them kind of deal. and stuff, but... Yep. Maggie is just sort of like... Doesn't she call Shannon Elizabeth a slut?
Chris Prime: like It's weird.
Zach Sheets: Yo - Yo.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it's like... A very bizarre like...
Zach Sheets: Hold on.
Chris Prime: Hey, that's your employee. like
Zach Sheets: The son calls Shadalib the slut and then... Maggie's like. That's not the right We're just bitch. and Like, she's like, oh, Maggie, you're crazy.
Zach Sheets: Also, is Chandler Smith supposed to be a teenager in this movie?
Chris Prime: No clue. I think she's supposed to be younger than she is, but, like, I don't buy it.
Zach Sheets: Because she was... but Because she was 28 when she made this movie.
Chris Prime: But to me, like she looks 28.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Also, huge age difference. because If she's probably 28 and like... The brother is supposed to be... Eleven?
Zach Sheets: Yeah, a huge, a huge like... Like time between when they had kids.
Zach Sheets: I mean, do you think she's supposed to be like... like a high school, like, 18 or something, or, like...
Chris Prime: She tries her best to play. that she's young and like.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: Like because she's like, oh, like a bathroom and like pretty things like. It's... I think it's played up that way
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: So... I mean I don't believe it.
Zach Sheets: but then but But then the family gets a visit from... Every lawyer. Who shows up and shows them a video that Ephraim Abram... recorded before he died of like Hey, I know I didn't. Uh...
Zach Sheets: really know you that well, but you got my house now, nephew.
Chris Prime: Which again, just makes sense to follow the original. It just... It seems a little bizarre.
Chris Prime: And. the family has to be yeah The family has to be such a... dire state that they're like yep this makes sense let's go there
Zach Sheets: mm -hmm
Chris Prime: Go there right now.
Zach Sheets: Yep.
Zach Sheets: Let's abandon this shit hole apartment and like go to like this new house that we've never seen, but we're going to live there now.
Chris Prime: I mean... Wasn't it that also the first day for Tony Jaloub to go back to work?
Zach Sheets: i Yeah, I don't remember like if he had been off for a while. like I think they said it was like six months. It's been six months since his wife died maybe or something.
Chris Prime: Oh really?
Zach Sheets: i feel I feel like they like they mentioned... like when they're When they're talking about, like, the... Because his wife turns out to be... The Wizard Lover? so In the Dark Zodiac?
Zach Sheets: And so there's like six months ago, like, like Matthew lo was like six months ago at St. Luke's hospital. And he's like, my wife, you son of a bitch.
Zach Sheets: So it hasn't been that long since... like the fire and everything i don't think
Zach Sheets: But yeah, but they all but they all have that the house and it's like... Just like this crazy modern. It's all glass. It has Latin writing on the wall. It's got...
Zach Sheets: all kinds of artifacts and there's like oh yeah this is awesome
Chris Prime: Yeah, but... The first thing they look at is, like, they're just happy to have a home.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: You know, like. It's not like they they were like... very homeless or anything. They they just lived in an apartment building. Like a cramped apartment building, but...
Zach Sheets: See you. Multiple bathrooms!
Chris Prime: Yeah, but the like. look at where you live like what architect was like what house was this what what like where have you seen a house like this And it doesn't raise like suspicion.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: it's got It's got that crazy like key the that you use. that is like It's like a delay when you turn the key on and it like powers up the building.
Chris Prime: Yeah, so if you leave and lock the door you have to wait every time you like
Zach Sheets: Yeah, I'd come back and be like, I'll wait 10 minutes for the i was to power back on again.
Chris Prime: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: I gotta wait for like the Event Horizon -style machinery under the building to the power back on.
Chris Prime: So I hope people aren't in a emergency to, like, go anywhere. like to lock up the place or like get in.
Zach Sheets: oh also Also, it's like like ectoplastic glass. that you can't It's shatterproof, so you can't break through it.
Zach Sheets: And then... And Matthew Lewis is like kind of like stalking around. He's like, I'm from the power company. I need to get i need to get in and look at your power. You're draining all the power from everyone else.
Chris Prime: Like, I get that. the lawyers, like, whatever, like, his job doesn't seem to care about the structure, because... Okay, so... does Is the lawyer in on the whole ghost hunting thing?
Chris Prime: Like he he sort of is because he. He knows that there are ghosts in the basement. He knows that, like...
Zach Sheets: Yes.
Chris Prime: Of the ghosts, which one's the most attractive?
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Chris Prime: And then. He also knew what the money was.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, i think I think he was just in it. like I don't know if he like knew... about, like, Ephraim Abraham, like, spoiler, like, faking his death. But I think i think he, like... I think he's just like like, oh, he's dead. I'm going to take his money because I know where his money is. And then get out of here and scan these people.
Zach Sheets: Although, do you think... You think Oliver? I think it... all right Yeah, I think he took all of it. Because like because he like it' like the bag of money is spilled next to him when he's super memorable dev.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I don't know if he took all of it. I know he took some. I don't know if it's like. quickly stuffed it all in a bag, but...
Zach Sheets: He takes a big like stack of it and he's like, that's a proper payment for my services rendered or something.
Chris Prime: Something like that. Uh... it's It's just like... like So... Not only... did the guy you work for actually have real ghosts you're trying to Rob.
Chris Prime: This guy now. And you thought you think this guy didn't have like a backup plan? Like, he couldn't recognize another psychopath?
Zach Sheets: Well, the money... was like that was like a trap. Because, like, if you pick the bag of money up, then that, like, causes the mechanism that, like, locks the house and, like, like starts the whole dark zodiac machine starting up.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I mean So... Good point that you said that because. When he turns... When he opens the house, he, like... Turns on all the lights. I guess, and powers up the place.
Chris Prime: But it doesn't trigger until you take the money in the basement. That is. by the Ghost. So that's assuming... Cyrus' plan relies...
Chris Prime: On. The family. going all the way into the basement, not freaking out and then taking the bag of money.
Zach Sheets: Or...
Chris Prime: And not just. Completely, like... like open the door and be like, nope.
Zach Sheets: Or he assumed his lawyer was going to screw him and then like, well, I know my shady lawyer is going to try to steal my money, so I'll leave it out where I know he'll come and try to steal it.
Chris Prime: Yeah. I mean, if anything the the real person in me like the the like hey this doesn't make sense would be... Go to that house, look at it from the outside, and just be like, I want to sell this.
Zach Sheets: Yep.
Chris Prime: I don't want to live in this glass house. Like. The glass house that is all transparent so there's no privacy. And then.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Uh... Tony Shalhoub even says, like... He figured out the taxes. Like, I would have to pay so much for this inheritance, but blah, blah, blah, blah. And the lawyer's like, oh no it's totally fine taken care of you don't have to worry about money whatsoever
Zach Sheets: Yeah. He was... Your uncle was a genius with finances. You don't think we about money anymore.
Chris Prime: But then even. the mathe like Tony Hsiu was a mathematician. He would just be like... No. Like...
Zach Sheets: And then. Tony Shalhoub mentions before, too, of like... Oh, Uncle Cyrus, like... Like... squandered the family fortune by like this this crazy like adventures or whatever his crazy schemes he was doing.
Zach Sheets: so so So it's like how much money he' is left in like but the... the Yo. The inheritance, whatever it is.
Chris Prime: Family fortune. yeah yeah
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: A good question. It. It does. question the whole, like... What was the original family doing before that? Were they all ghost hunters? Or were they all mathematicians?
Chris Prime: Were they inventors?
Zach Sheets: Yeah, why why is, like, Ephraim and Abraham, like, the what like it's it seems like a a perfectly normal, like, Tony Shalhoub and, like, his family are, like, perfectly normal, and then he's, like, a like demonic.
Zach Sheets: Like a world travel, like world adventurer.
Chris Prime: Yeah.
Chris Prime: He's the outlier, but I guess that's why he's the strange. Uncle. that
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: It's less like... compassion for. Uh... But F. Murray Abraham really sells the whole idea that... We shouldn't care. uh about like what happens to him because he's not a good guy
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Chris Prime: Uh, I mean, I think the beginning tells you that, where he essentially has his... His ghost busting, like moving crew. like all of them get killed and he's sort of like whatever
Zach Sheets: And then they then there's also like the... the ghost rights people that show up there's like these two these people who show up like these are these are people like they that they have rights it's like they're dead but No one cares.
Zach Sheets: And we're going to use our spells to free them.
Chris Prime: But like, it doesn't work. like I kind of forgot about the ethical ghosts. hunters I mean. One of them shows up later, but... The idea is that the ghost hunting community needed like advocates.
Zach Sheets: Or like or like go they didn like ghost there's like like, it's like ghost rights. Yeah, it's like the ghosts are people too. They they have rights that we need to like respect.
Zach Sheets: you can't You can't just like trap the trap them in like these your ghost boxes.
Chris Prime: I don't know. I feel like you can when they're like... Monsters.
Zach Sheets: Yes.
Chris Prime: Understand if... The ghost that they were. Trying to get was like an innocent But. I think. but Since the machine runs on tragedy.
Chris Prime: like whatever this like
Zach Sheets: Let's go.
Chris Prime: Future Machine is like, you need ghosts with specific, specific like... Issues.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. Well, it's like yeah like all all the ghosts are just like. absolute monsters and then And also Tony Shalhoub's wife.
Zach Sheets: who just Who just, like... Died in a hospital of fire Or like Died to fire in a fire And then died in a hospital And it's like It's like. her We need her plus... the The worst like serial killer monster ghost in history.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I don't understand why that was like... need it I also... Like. Don't understand what the 13 goes. is too because that It's like a why?
Chris Prime: That's also the big twist. It's like you don't actually need a 13th ghost
Zach Sheets: well Well, at first... at first they're like It's like... The 13 ghosts can... Like, stop the machine. Because it's like if you so if it's, like, a like a someone who sacrificed themselves for, like...
Zach Sheets: love a pure love, then you can destroy the machine because the machine is pure evil. but but it turns out oh no it's actually like it needs like a like the machine needs like a live sacrifice like to like to complete it, and then that turns it on and like gives you gives you like the power of it.
Chris Prime: Like...
Zach Sheets: And then. The effort.
Chris Prime: that's an evil machine i get that
Zach Sheets: Hmm.
Zach Sheets: that that The whole the whole like exposition dump is just insane. of like We're like... it's like kalina the uh like ghost rights person like uh Spirit Liberator shows up and she has like the whole book and she write runs through every single ghost and then like explains the...
Zach Sheets: The guy who, like... create the machine and then it's got like you know it's like The Oculus, like... like malif or whatever like it's like the evil lens or the demon lens and
Chris Prime: Wait, did she explain the glass, or is she explaining the goggles?
Zach Sheets: Well, it's it's like the... The machine has like a special let like the when you. When it's fully activated, it's like the special lens, like the demon lens or whatever, and that's what you'd like you see look through to see like the future or whatever.
Chris Prime: Oh I see.
Zach Sheets: I don't think, they they never explained the goggles. The goggles are just like a thing. It's like, oh yeah, ghost goggles, right? Everyone ever ever has ghost goggles.
Chris Prime: How come they're not selling that? Like... fmurray rearhand could just make a more money if he just sold the goggles and then that's just something you have and then anyone could just buy it because it's not you need magic to activate the goggles The goggles don't have, in like...
Chris Prime: enchantment it's written on the lens so they don't look Different.
Zach Sheets: Mhm.
Zach Sheets: And then and he would also have like irrefutable proof that ghosts exist. like He's like, here, put these goggles on. See, ghosts! they're real
Chris Prime: But... But then it's like you get the ethical Ghost Hunters who are like... You shouldn't look at them. Or like they need to be free.
Zach Sheets: yeah Mhm.
Chris Prime: Like I get maybe like. Don't put them in boxes and keep them under your house. But. I don't know what the ghost hunters wanted to do because. The ghosts were just killing already. Like they.
Chris Prime: They're killer ghosts.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, they're like homicidal monsters. yeah they're just
Chris Prime: anything Cyrus is actually doing a better thing of contaminating them. Like, you know, getting them and putting them away for a bit. Most of them, at least.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, it's not like... if you freed them they they like revert back to like they're like it's not like they got like Uh... like transformed because they were like contained and turned into monsters.
Zach Sheets: like They were just always monsters.
Chris Prime: Yeah, yeah that's That's a big point you you point out. like it but Like... I also thought... That maybe... uh cyrus has been collecting these ghosts like experimenting on them And you kind I thought you'd find that out later. like He keeps capturing ghosts, and then or maybe wanted to escape.
Chris Prime: But you find out that he's been. Like... Not breathing, but he's been... training or corrupting them.
Zach Sheets: Torturing that. or Yeah.
Chris Prime: it Yeah, like... Because... Of all the ghosts. A few of them make sense of... They looked how they died. Like in that moment of their death or whatever they're wearing or.
Chris Prime: However injured they were. But then you get one or two ghosts that I'm like, what? What kind of Ghostbuster ghost is this?
Zach Sheets: like Like the guy who's dressed like a baby and his mom?
Chris Prime: yeah
Zach Sheets: Yeah. I fed him too much.
Chris Prime: they They just... Yeah.
Zach Sheets: He died from overeating.
Chris Prime: And then the mom died of like a broken heart or like. A gas leak? She seems fine.
Zach Sheets: And then it's like there's the kid the kid who got like an arrow shot through his head.
Chris Prime: Makes sense.
Zach Sheets: From like the 50s or whatever.
Chris Prime: don't even need like I don't think they even backstory that. They're just like, look. A ghost kid.
Zach Sheets: Yep. He was playing Cowboys and Indians and he got shot in the head with a real arrow.
Zach Sheets: And it's like the greaser guy. With a baseball bat?
Chris Prime: of the torn prints.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, the Tor Prince.
Zach Sheets: I don't, some of the, like, yeah, like, how is how is he the the Torn Prince? like Some of the names just like make no sense either.
Chris Prime: I think he was like. Probably just like royalty to like his group.
Zach Sheets: Like, the torso I get. The torso is a torso. That makes perfect sense.
Chris Prime: Yeah, the torso doesn't even have a name. It's just torso. like
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: They're even like... but That's what I'm saying. like This movie. Has an issue where you have these like. cool concept monsters, but you want to know them a little bit. and It's not like they're they're... They're more famous now because there's like... No information?
Chris Prime: But I think that's like an accident. you know like these are like cult Favorite. Goose. things about this movie aside from the obvious selling point and you know, a lot of teenage boys having this be their first, like, sleepover movie. Which I'm not guilty of. This is definitely a movie that like my friends during a sleepover were like, let's rent 13 ghosts. I'm like, I guess.
Chris Prime: And it's like, oh, we could have watched Vincent Price movies. We could have done. you know some other kind of classic 80s slasher but i remember specifically one sleepover just like 13 ghosts and you put it on and you're like let's fast forward Let's fast forward. Let's stop here. Let's fast forward.
Zach Sheets: Well, definitely. Like. like They definitely like kick they they kick things off. It's like... here's It's the angry princess. She's naked. but like here's this 20 minutes of her she's the only ghost like walking around
Zach Sheets: Which like in like the lawyers are like, oh yeah.
Zach Sheets: which Which I think we we gotta go back and mention, like, the the lawyer has, like... the the best death in the movie, which is like he backs into a sliding glass door and that cuts him in half. He gets bisected by like a glass door and it's like...
Zach Sheets: Both have to slide away separately.
Zach Sheets: Which I think, like Steve Beck, the director, like definitely, like you know... upped himself in Ghost Ship. The next year. With like the opening of Ghost Ship, where everyone's just got like... Destroyed by that wire.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it's definitely like another body. Mutilation. effect that I think It's like. I don't know, like a really good... selling point about it because I think about the opening. It's like generic.
Chris Prime: Like. physical feats of strength, but nothing too... Like. iconic. But... Just weird that the lawyer gets the like very iconic like. death and it's not even the ghost that kills him you know it's just the door
Zach Sheets: An accident? Yeah.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it's like an accent.
Zach Sheets: you like but exit Yeah. I feel like this movie needed a couple more... Like. fodder characters. Just have like like just the of like ghost like kill some more people. and like interesting ways because like well you're not gonna kill the family You got...
Zach Sheets: So it's like you got the lawyer and then you got. Matthew Lord, and that's it.
Zach Sheets: Later, shoot. Like, should like have have just, like, some, I don't know, some, like, random, like, workers or something, or maybe just a couple other random people to, like, to get killed.
Zach Sheets: Because they get attacked a lot. like it's like It's like the jackal, like that ghost, is like... It's just like slashing people because I guess. He's got razor claws or something.
Chris Prime: Yeah. and something where like maybe he bumps into like one of the other ghosts that we kind of don't remember you know
Zach Sheets: like what like yeah what like It's like, what could the baby do? like The baby doesn't do anything. The the big baby doesn't do nothing anything. He doesn't kill anybody. He looks at someone.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I don't know. see It's like, are they all tragic or are they just all, like, misunderstood people? and Except for, like... three three are obviously like evil
Zach Sheets: Yeah. And it's like the angry princess has like a knife, but she never uses it.
Chris Prime: No, she's just more like haunts and it's like you I think she did that to herself.
Zach Sheets: yeah definitely it definitely seems like yeah she like because like there's like the the scene where like uh shannon elizabeth goes and finds like it's like oh this is my room that she like goes in the bathroom and then it's kind of a cool shot where like you you like go into like she's not wearing like the like ghost goggles but then you go into the ghost goggles the camera goes through them and it's like oh now We're wearing the ghost goggles, basically.
Zach Sheets: And then you see like the whole like room is like covered in blood. And it's just like, I'm sorry on the floor.
Zach Sheets: And then Shannon Lisbon is just like is like splashing water on her face for like... it Like a very long amount of time. It's like. One. Chew? Three?
Chris Prime: and See, like... It could be a whole... thing where we think Shanna Elizabeth is like I don't know. Not, not, uh. Not touched.
Chris Prime: but It's like. She's like definitely the like ditzy. Like... pretty character that's just like, ha ha ha, this is great, I can't wait to live in this glass house.
Zach Sheets: m
Chris Prime: And like, play with flo faucets. I mean, it makes it seem like her own home was like. Like a bomb shelter or something. like It looked like a fine apartment, you know?
Chris Prime: Maybe just don't have the nanny.
Zach Sheets: Yum! It's like, i know I know it's small, guys, but we we had to give Maggie a room because she's living with us now. No, you don't. She has her own house. She could leave and go home.
Chris Prime: I mean not only that... Uh... Like. The kid is already talking about, like... He's doing a murder podcast. like He's inventing like murder podcasts by accident.
Zach Sheets: yeah It's even the true cry podcast. Yeah.
Chris Prime: Yeah. And if they let that kick continue, he could have started his own, like... podcast empire on just like true crime murder podcasts you know
Chris Prime: But no. He had to leave his Razor scooter on the ground.
Zach Sheets: Yup. You had to get lowered lured into the basement by by the... With a bunch of ghosts.
Chris Prime: Which is actually a recreation of what happened in the original. What? Except. For the voice, it's like... He sees money.
Zach Sheets: And then... And then the kids. like van Like, they get... kidnapped and then there's they're like They vanish for like... the Almost the entire like middle like it's like entire middle of the movie, they're just gone. It's this just it's just the four like adult characters walking around.
Zach Sheets: And there's a lot of them just like... like moving through like the hallways and like seeing ghosts and running away and then like barely escaping like uh The walls have the special like spells on them that block the ghosts. Oh, I just managed to get past and this wall and like the ghost is stuck now.
Chris Prime: So, like, where... Do the ghosts just not become... physical form, like I... They just become like... Vapors?
Zach Sheets: It's weird it's weird yeah because like they can they can physically harm you. But you can't... but They're invisible and you can't see them without the ghost goggles. But they they they can cause physical things to happen. Like like in the opening, like the...
Zach Sheets: Is it like the berserker? but Like the juggernaut? Guys, like...
Chris Prime: Yeah, they called him the Juggernaut, but they then he got another name. They called him the Breaker?
Zach Sheets: and yeah i think yeah maybe that was like a serial killer name or something he has something to do with like a truck too like see a truck driver or something because they have like the truck full of blood that like drives through the Junkyard.
Zach Sheets: It's like, that willll this will lure him in.
Chris Prime: Which... Which, by the way, it's like All the ghosts up until that point didn't need bait. They mention.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: But then they needed bait for this one, and it's like... Why does the... spraying of blood bait him. And then how did they capture the other ghost without bait? They just sort of like... In the box you go. like Just scoop them up.
Zach Sheets: But then there's some sort of like... let and record it like i think i'm obviously afraid but like there's some sort of recording it's like a latin something talking in latin that like draws them Because later on they play that and like it draws them like the like the the main...
Zach Sheets: Part of like the Zodiac room.
Chris Prime: Oh, yeah, yeah. they they They just. That. fade enough right like
Zach Sheets: Hmm?
Chris Prime: then i don't know why the truck full of blood which
Chris Prime: Is Matthew Little, like, responsible for that? like If you think about it. He's the only survivor of that issue, of that incident, so then...
Zach Sheets: Hmm.
Chris Prime: did Did he just like run away?
Zach Sheets: Yeah, because it's like a hard... like he like see He sees... in the opening he sees like ephraim like his throat like is is like cut by some of debris like just like oh oh man cyrus and then it's like hard cut to chandeliers brother like playing in the yard.
Chris Prime: I mean, again. Visually, it's it's fine. it It actually adds a lot. What do you think the movie's going to be? Because that's the... Like. you know, Hey, this isn't your dad's 13 ghost movie.
Chris Prime: it just doesn't get back to that level again. Because then it just becomes like, follow this family. Who? You. You sort of care about, but it's mostly like Tony Shalhoub for like. 80 % of the movie not believing in ghosts.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, until he eventually puts the goggles on. It's like, oh, okay, go surreal.
Chris Prime: Ghosts are real and my wife is just roaming around this house somewhere.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Zach Sheets: Which I... Why didn't the wife help more, too? like i mean she kind of like The thing she does is like tell her son to like not come down to the basement, but the other ghost is like, no, don't listen to her. Come down to the basement. It's fun.
Chris Prime: yeah who was that that was like yeah keep going
Zach Sheets: I think that was the... Bound? The Bound Woman? who I think hung herself.
Chris Prime: And. I mean, besides scaring the kid, that that's all she the kid the bound woman wanted to do.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: And then. And he gets scared, like runs into like a glass wall and knocks himself out. And then then he wakes up, and then but then... Yeah. another ghost comes like grabs him and drags him away
Chris Prime: And then he's just mostly gone for the rest of the movie.
Zach Sheets: And then is somehow Shane and Elizabeth gets like taken like literally right from like. Like. behind telling her she was back. Like, he's standing right behind him, and then she just vanishes, and they're like, oh, where'd she go?
Zach Sheets: I don't know. What happens?
Chris Prime: Yeah, where'd she get taken in this glass hallway?
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: Tony Shalhoub and Matthew Lillard were there and I was like oh like, oh man, she vanished. What happened?
Chris Prime: See, if they said there was a trap door... Or... Like... The ghost just sort of like... Grabbed her and ran? That would have been fine. But really, it was like, was that F.
Zach Sheets: oh
Chris Prime: Murray Abraham? He's also like... Like a ninja?
Zach Sheets: He's using like his cape. He kind of has like a Dracula cape going on. Aha! aha
Chris Prime: Your defenses were down, so I stole your grown child.
Zach Sheets: I got my cape and my sword cane.
Chris Prime: I thought he was going to use that.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, they reveal it just like he's kind of like just like. You think it more was like a pointer?
Zach Sheets: But yeah, but there's a whole thing. So like. yeah kalina who's like the spirit liberator like she shows up she's got special flares that can like Like. Make the ghost back off. And then she.
Zach Sheets: Drops all the exposition. and in her like her big She has that her giant book of the history of everything. And then... But then it's like. there's The twist is...
Zach Sheets: Oh, no, she's actually... uh with f marie abraham and she wants the machine to work And she like killed her old partner.
Chris Prime: and So I think, like... Bye.
Chris Prime: I... So they, it's a weird convoluted plan. Because. essentially what they needed was They needed to fake F. Murray Abraham's death.
Chris Prime: semi -publicly.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: So that Matthew Little could just give up on ghost hunting. Right.
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Chris Prime: Then... They needed to eliminate the rival ghost hunter that was like the ethical ghost hunter. I guess like the real ethical guy who... We barely got to know.
Zach Sheets: Yep.
Chris Prime: screams that ghosts have rights or something and then He just dies. that scene.
Zach Sheets: And he and he had the book he had the actual book of spells that Kalina had to steal.
Chris Prime: Okay. Because then later on, there's a scene where Kalina is like. Rummaging through. Bear? Like. Library, I guess? Whatever, like...
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Was there. their info. And then she found it in time so that she could rush over to the glass house. to... Uh...
Chris Prime: To just give the book?
Zach Sheets: to to to yeah To bring the book to F. Marie Abraham, but then also to... make sure
Chris Prime: I'll convince Tony Shalhoub.
Zach Sheets: Make sure took cle with so shilu to kill himself in the machine. because to like like Oh, you're sacrificing yourself to save your kids. But in reality, you're actually like you're you're causing the machine to... like fully fully activate.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it's like a gamble on like... this ghost hunter to... appeal appeal to the Tony Shalhoub character to, like, okay, you need to kill yourself.
Zach Sheets: But then Kalina's kind of... She's she's like a little bit against like using the kids, and Ephraim's like... Well, I don't need you anymore. crush you in a wall.
Chris Prime: yeah Was that like the only wall that crushes people or that? he set off a trap that like, conveniently crushes any person if they get within range.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, it's it's like... the Because the house shifts by itself. But then also, yeah, it seems like every rehab has like, like. He can, like, activate... like and At will, just like... do do Like... Turn things down when he wants to do.
Chris Prime: It's like a convenient. Like. know tool Whenever a character is like, oh, you're done, murder. Uh. Now, I say that because was that unless it's not, it's part of the architect's design. It's just like.
Chris Prime: At certain points, like it just crushes you here.
Zach Sheets: You should... Well... Make sure you memorize the... Disgusting. where all the walls are gonna go because if you get caught in like this hallway you're gonna get crushed death so just make sure you're you're aware of when the when the shifts are gonna happen
Zach Sheets: Other than that, I think we're all set.
Chris Prime: There's no alarm when it shifts.
Zach Sheets: you
Chris Prime: It just happens.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: So it's not really a good... safety room. but
Zach Sheets: And it kind like it kind of only shifts once in the movie. the initial shift when everything locks down and then it kind of like just like a little bit of a shift like late in the middle of the movie, and then that's it. It doesn't shift again.
Chris Prime: Yeah. Once everything's in place, it's just... That's it. It needed to shift like a few times, but nothing too crazy. It's not like the basement becomes like the top floor and the bottom becomes the basement. Like it, it just. where like whatever level you're on, that's just what it is.
Zach Sheets: Like. Yeah, like a hallway might close off a dead end that wasn't dead end before. That's that's about it.
Zach Sheets: But then it also seems like... you if if you're in If it shifts, you can still like open... like you can like open a wall or like move through like the The space. because Because at one point... like
Zach Sheets: Like, Matthew Leroy's like... He's trapped in a room and he like gets out of it. He's like, oh, the door's open. All right, I'm going to get out of here.
Zach Sheets: And then they they actually come up with, I do like but like like there's the idea of like... We're going to take one of these last... panels with us because we know it stops the ghost and just like walk around with like a giant like like a riot shield
Chris Prime: Shield. Yeah. it's It's pretty cool. It just... They only fight like one real ghost with it.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: And then even then, it doesn't really work.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, Methyl would, like, sacrifice himself to, like, protect Tony Shalhoub, like, and he think gets, like, horribly beaten up by, like, the Jackal and the Hammer. No, it's the, uh...
Zach Sheets: The juggernaut and hammer. Smash him against the walls, like break his back, and slam him down. Which... He had, like, a vision of... He was, like... He...
Zach Sheets: It's like the one time you can see the future.
Chris Prime: No, and he sees it twice. He sees the machine once. In the beginning. And then he sees his death, like... when he goes in the basement.
Zach Sheets: But i don't I don't think he like normally sees the future, though. he sees he sees like people like If he touches people, he sees like their past.
Chris Prime: That's true. I think so. You're right.
Zach Sheets: It's just like you said like right there like oh, I see my future
Chris Prime: Well, that's why he's like. don't touch me everything i touch is just i see too so much info and it overloads him
Zach Sheets: That was hilarious. Tony Shubin is like... like and like you like Because he has, like, seizures, too, when, like, the evil ghosts are around. And, like, Tony Shalhoub's, like, patting on the back, like, hey, buddy, you okay? And every time he pats on the back, he just sees, like, more and more, like, horrific things.
Zach Sheets: He seems like more like his wife burning in a fire. He's like, you could be good, man? He's like, stop touching me!
Chris Prime: You know. I feel like this is the, like, rogue syndrome, where... It's like Dude, there's not just bare skin or any time. There's contact with his clothing.
Zach Sheets: it was It was like Tony Shalhoub was touching his skin. He was patting on the back his back on his clothes. it's like it just A physical touch. It doesn't have to be on your skin. it is like If he touches someone, like it's like he gets like their... their life story.
Chris Prime: It's interesting that he's a psychic, but he's also like a ghost psychic.
Zach Sheets: hu
Chris Prime: I'm not sure if that works both ways. I've seen movies where it's like more of a everyone's alive psychic. kind of thing and not like I speak to the dead, psychic. I feel like that's a different category.
Chris Prime: Go psychics.
Chris Prime: That's just me. it's like paranormal psychiatry
Zach Sheets: Yeah, cause he because he...
Chris Prime: teleconnet I think it's more of a telekinetic. No.
Zach Sheets: Telepathic.
Chris Prime: Telepathic? Is that what it is?
Zach Sheets: Yeah, because he's not talking to the ghosts. He just sensed that they're near. with other goggles, but he can't really... That's all he can do. if He just... Those are next, like, nearby. You can't really do anything else about it.
Zach Sheets: Like he he he can't like talk to them or be like, hey, stop or like get out of here. like
Chris Prime: Hey, the ghosts don't really make it. known that they understand the words they're just They just have like stairs.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: And I guess...
Zach Sheets: But...
Chris Prime: sort of acknowledgements.
Zach Sheets: but But Tony Shiloh's wife can talk to, like, can talk fine.
Chris Prime: Oh yeah!
Zach Sheets: And then like the bound lady. it like, lures the sun down by talking to him.
Chris Prime: and think But she did that for like... Shits and giggles.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: But yeah, but then eventually it comes down to like the the like Tony Shalhoub ends up. i at like It's... The machine is fli fully is like... activating The ghosts are all... Around. their On their proper Zodiac sign.
Zach Sheets: And then. Shane Elizabeth and her brother are like in the middle of these like spinning... Uh, like razor gears? And... I mean, it it basically turns into Spy Kids. like It looks like like a Spy Kids scene where it's just like... like they're on like a green screen it's all just like cg around them
Chris Prime: Yeah, the... The budget for this was... Not great. They could have really just made it darker. It could have been more of a, like... Like... darkened room to not see all the like
Zach Sheets: Okay.
Chris Prime: The... The glossiness of early CG.
Zach Sheets: but Yeah, it's it's it's like super bright room. And then like under, like we see under where they're sitting, they're like sitting on, it's like. weird like glowing red like hellish gears under them that doesn't look great either
Zach Sheets: so yeah it's just like oh it's like Yeah. Put. Robert Rodriguez make this on of his laptop? like
Zach Sheets: And then Tony Shalhoub finds out that it's like his uncle's alive, and then... uh But then all all the ghost all the ghosts like... pick up like turn around like pick him up and throw him into the gears Which...
Zach Sheets: it's like that that like that doesn't count as the 13th ghost i guess like he doesn't count as the 13th ghost So activate the machine.
Chris Prime: What? Matthew Lillard is also a ghost. He's technically a 13th ghost.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Well, I think you have to do it as a self -sacrifice. And I think a very Abraham. didn't want to die, so that didn't count.
Zach Sheets: And I guess maybe these ghosts were around like maybe they weren't in the proper placement. or something maybe so like they have to be like exactly on their their like little like zodiac sign
Chris Prime: Designate it like... 13. Zodiac. Alignment.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm. i do like I do like that like they go around and just like say all the ghost names again. It's like... In case you guys forgot, here's all the ghosts again.
Chris Prime: Yeah. like Again, they say the names and then... Like... We don't really spend a lot of time with any of them. like i I mean, besides the... The top. Three or four.
Chris Prime: And.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I mean...
Chris Prime: these These ghosts, like, besides the Wiltered...
Zach Sheets: What's the...
Chris Prime: Widow, or the Wilted Woman?
Zach Sheets: The withered lover.
Chris Prime: The Widow lover, like... Uh, she didn't want to go. Like, I don't know of everyone else because they seem like the other ghosts are just like, whatever.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: so We we can't can't resist this Latin recording that's playing.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, and then... And then, yeah, Matthew Lerner's ghost shows up and gives Tony Shulman, like, a pep talk, like, hey, you got the power inside you all along, man. Like, you can save your kids.
Zach Sheets: And then tell she was like... Oh, right. I do. And then he gets like. Like... it's it's like a very like video gamey like if the time to jump perfectly like make sure Because the gears like stop every once in a while. So it's like you have to time it to like make sure you don't hit the gears. and like Get to the center platform.
Chris Prime: Nowhere in the movie indicates that Tony Shalhoub's like an athlete or a former like mountain climber or something where like he's afraid to jump. or something like He doesn't really overcome anything. He just sort of goes, crap, I got to run into this machine.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. He's not even like... like He doesn't even like mention like math. like He's not even like... Oh, it's like every every three seconds is like a cycle. If I type it perfectly... but like If I calculate the time, I could make the jump.
Zach Sheets: He's just like, alright, hopefully this is it.
Chris Prime: Yeah, I wanted him to. Do something or like. remember something about maybe the house fire that started we we don't still even know what caused that house fire
Zach Sheets: Yeah. Oh, shoot. We also forgot to mention, like... When he and, uh... f3 hammer fighting uh maggie who's like disappeared for a while shows back up, and she...
Zach Sheets: Like. like scratches like dj scratches like the latin recording To like distract the the ghosts?
Chris Prime: So. that That's also something that... I think was a little weird to give the one... only a black character like the dj scratching thing i think i was more to play into that she does come from the music world but it's not conveyed well like it's
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: It's like. I don't know how popular. Raw Digger was in 2001, but... For someone who like did not know that, it's like... This seems odd. Like it's a very odd choice.
Zach Sheets: m it's It's very like... Like... Which Halloween was it with Busta Rhymes? Suck a treat, motherfucker.
Chris Prime: It's like. H2O 20 years later.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. to
Zach Sheets: It's like, we we know we know the streets.
Chris Prime: Like, of all the Halloween movies, Buster Rhymes is the one that like can go toe -to -toe. With Michael Myers without magic, just a straight up like. Fist fight.
Chris Prime: So kind of hard to believe. But this was even weirder where it's like. Maggie, the the person that you might have. you know, uh Discounted because she got knocked out by a book.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. up.
Chris Prime: He's back.
Zach Sheets: Mm.
Zach Sheets: And then that also causes like the machine to malfunction. It's blowing up and everything's... collapsing.
Zach Sheets: And then and luckily luckily the house like blows up around... like Tony Shulman's family because like they're just like they're fine on this like little platform but the rest of the building is like blowing up around them
Chris Prime: Yeah. Didn't also like. kathlyn also bring dynamite as like a backup plan
Zach Sheets: I think that was, I think it was just a lie. Cause she, she, she didn't want the, vote she. She wanted the machine to work. She didn't want to blow it up.
Chris Prime: Okay, so she brought like just clay or like... Just something fake.
Zach Sheets: Flares. It's like more flares.
Chris Prime: yeah Did the flares actually work?
Zach Sheets: i think I think those actually worked. It was like Quicksilver Flair or something. they like like makes the ghost back off.
Zach Sheets: But then when the when the house blows up, like, all the ghosts, like, kind of just, like, wander off. and So that they're, like, now out they're out they're not free on the world to, like.
Chris Prime: ah're free They're free. Yeah, they're gonna do more killing.
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: I understand maybe, like... They fixed the machine. it it Sends the ghost to like... the afterlife, but it just, like, they let them loosen the world. And not all of them are great.
Zach Sheets: Well, it seems like... Uh... Like the mom. Like kind of like because she like reverts back to like her like. Like. healthy form. And then kind of just like vanishes. It seems like she like goes to the afterlife.
Zach Sheets: But then, yeah, all the rest of the girls just, like it was like, walk off into the woods. like
Zach Sheets: I definitely feel like they should have had like... Yeah, like that they all like. kind of like like go back to they they turn normal or something and then it's like oh you freed us we're free now
Chris Prime: Now we're normal spirits and not like.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: crazy, tortured versions of ourselves. but Nope, it's like... If anything...
Zach Sheets: The spelt... the sp the spells were like corrupting us and now you've that you stopped it so thank you
Chris Prime: If anything, the hammer is going to add more nails to himself.
Zach Sheets: Yelp.
Chris Prime: and then
Zach Sheets: Juggernaut's going to go rip people in half or something.
Chris Prime: Just sort of rampaging to the next neighbors who live next to this monstrosity house.
Zach Sheets: Like they're all they're all basically like like like they're like jake bucey for the frighteners where he's just like i'm a ghost serial killer now I'm going to continue my killing spree.
Chris Prime: Yeah.
Chris Prime: Like I... It's weird that like. They are ghosts that. have unfinished business all right that's usually the classic reason you're a ghost But your business is like to keep murdering.
Zach Sheets: All right.
Chris Prime: It's like, no, no, that's the rule. Like unfinished.
Chris Prime: That's what they wanted to do in life.
Zach Sheets: That's all I know is killin'.
Chris Prime: I mean, the good thing is it didn't have a part where the ghosts have like a monologue about like why they're sad or angry. It's like. You're just evil. That's fine. You stay evil.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, it's like, I mean... It makes sense that the guy who directed this also directed Ghost Ship, because Ghost Ship is also very similar. It's just like... Oh, there's a bunch of random ghosts. They're all evil.
Zach Sheets: but least At least that was like passengers. like It was like the passengers on the ship and like the crew on the ship.
Chris Prime: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: This is just like, oh, a bunch of just like... It's like. A bunch of random... Bye -bye. ghosts from around the world, apparently.
Chris Prime: Are they around the world?
Zach Sheets: That...
Chris Prime: They seem all American.
Zach Sheets: That this this guy from like... yo the 1500s or whatever it was like predicted that to like you have to go find Uh... Whatever like whatever like the the Hammer's actual real name is, if you have to find him and... 400 years from now, he'll exist.
Chris Prime: Yeah, that guy had a machine that was like There's going to be a thing called the internet. And then there's going to be this crazy. Guy is gonna trick his nephew Also...
Chris Prime: Speaking of that, when he, like... When the lawyer opens his, like... I guess laptop. And it has that like. archaic like satanic background as a wallpaper that doesn't give anyone in that room red flags that
Zach Sheets: Yeah. Yeah. Hmm.
Chris Prime: That's the video clip that's going to start playing the like. Will.
Zach Sheets: Yeah. So you into the see the cults? Like, no, why would you say that? I do look like... That video's weird, too, because, like... Every harem is like... anticipating their responses.
Zach Sheets: It's like, oh what do we get? It's like, I'm giving you a house. it's like and It's like, that's right, Arthur.
Chris Prime: yeah It's like, is this live streaming?
Zach Sheets: And then there's a part where like it like the the video closes. And then. I think, like, Tony Shloop says something, and then, then like, the video pops back open, like, I heard it. It's like, oh, okay, yeah, one more thing.
Zach Sheets: Are they closest again?
Chris Prime: I got to watch that scene again.
Zach Sheets: So that's...
Chris Prime: but yeah yeah I could see like, it's just. Quick. editing to kind of get the Message across.
Chris Prime: But it's such a shame because the. That house transition. audio wise was like a pretty good idea of where like this family is, you know, and then the dire straits that they're in.
Zach Sheets: mm -hmm
Zach Sheets: But not dire enough that they couldn't hire. like Fall of a loving nanny.
Chris Prime: It's like, oh, we still need a nanny, though. We gotta be fashionable. Like, a live -in nanny? and A Jersey nanny.
Zach Sheets: i i mean Shane and Elizabeth could watch her brother, right? I mean, you don't need to...
Chris Prime: We don't know if Shannon Elizabeth is in college, if she graduated, if she's in high school.
Zach Sheets: like
Chris Prime: We have no idea.
Zach Sheets: I mean the son's going to school And then. You just gotta, like, watch him for a couple hours until twenty Tony Shalhoub is... gets up. home from work i don't know if what why do you need like a full -time nanny to like... Like.
Zach Sheets: clean your house the house look is a wreck she's not du she's not doing that she can't cook
Chris Prime: you like like I understand maybe she was like the mom's friend or something. i Just something would have been.
Zach Sheets: Hmm.
Chris Prime: Give us more like I don't know like The movie. Asks us to invest in the family. But then... We want to know more about the ghosts. And then by the end of the movie, we're just like, we care more about the family than the ghosts now.
Zach Sheets: m
Chris Prime: And then out of nowhere, it's like, let's make the let's end on a funny note with Mackie complaining that she's quitting being a nanny.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Chris Prime: When is she going to go out?
Zach Sheets: It's like, y 'all are crazy.
Chris Prime: Like. Yeah, but like... What? Where's she going? Like she did nothing for this family for like the six months.
Chris Prime: oh no it could be like two months because the wife died six months prior to this When did they pick up Maggie?
Zach Sheets: It's like, so she was just like, i need I need so much help. I can't i can't handle these kids by myself.
Chris Prime: Is, like, one of the past due bills on his board a Maggie bill?
Zach Sheets: Maze costs us like a thousand dollars a week.
Chris Prime: In 2001 money, that's a lot.
Zach Sheets: She just... Just gives him like an itemized bill of like... it's It's like service charges. like food bill.
Chris Prime: Listening to your son.
Zach Sheets: What are all these charges?
Chris Prime: listening to the sun uh ramble off about like murders.
Chris Prime: Yeah. It would have been cool if... If like there was more tie -in to... beaming. uh we we did mentioning that
Chris Prime: Tony Shalhoub's character, it's something that he like can he his character arc would have been stronger if it was something he... remembered about his wife that brought him courage or Or light.
Zach Sheets: m
Chris Prime: He uses math skills. Uh... I think the kids is like as semi -annoying as they are. they They sort of like leave the movie and... Like that.
Chris Prime: that's fine because this is a rated r so you don't want them to just not have like anything to do Uh... just like i think the lawyer killed he got killed too early in the movie me.
Zach Sheets: hu
Chris Prime: He should have been part of... F. Murray Abraham scheme. With Cyrus, like, pulling levers and stuff. And then gets, like, betrayed. And then that's when we think, okay, maybe. Uh...
Chris Prime: Like. The lawyer and the... Ethical ghost hunter. Catherine. Kayleen?
Zach Sheets: Kalina.
Chris Prime: Alina, like you think maybe she's... Like the actual true architect. It's like nope you know like it's like they can but then it's like nope exposition dump like everything about the movie all All back to back.
Zach Sheets: Yeah, and and and and I think, like I mentioned before, I think it definitely needed like a couple more characters just to be like... Like ghost kills. Give us a couple more like cool kills. like they They don't do anything as cool as like the lawyer kill.
Chris Prime: Yeah, it pretty much peaks at that. For like... Innovative kills.
Zach Sheets: Mm -hmm.
Zach Sheets: And I think I think i i definitely prefer... Go ship. Of like the. The two like the only two Steve Beck movies.
Chris Prime: A ghost ship has a little more innovative things. The ghosts are more like... they They actually go on more of a killing thing.
Zach Sheets: and I mean, it's it has... Ghost Ship has one of the greatest openings of all time, too.
Zach Sheets: But i yeah, I mean, I got... yeah turkey goes it's I guess it's become kind of a cult classic. It got like a... I think like like a fancy like Shout Factory Blu -ray a couple years ago. And then...
Zach Sheets: I guess there was like, in 2023, like Dirt Castle said, there's gonna be like a 13 Ghost TV show, but that's... there's anything he's been done since he announced that
Chris Prime: It's a shame because I feel like... It it could have worked. In theory.
Zach Sheets: Especially if they like like yeah like dig into like the backstories of the ghosts.
Chris Prime: Or even like...
Zach Sheets: finally and stuff.
Chris Prime: how how they get the ghosts and You know. How, like, they... the the need to To like capture them and stuff
Zach Sheets: hu
Chris Prime: Besides, like... the machine that can see the past and future but like It didn't work in the past, it didn't work in the future.
Zach Sheets: Yeah.
Zach Sheets: I wonder what, was when know like... uh f3 like actually wanted to like see like is Like, what was his plan to, like... I'm gonna get so many stock tips.
Chris Prime: I guess, like... He just wanted to... have the ability to see the future to avoid things but
Zach Sheets: Or manipulate it or something. or be like ahll I'll be able to like control people maybe.
Chris Prime: I mean, he seemed pretty rich. he had a ghost hunting squad. like i
Zach Sheets: Yeah, he had a full like mercenary team.
Zach Sheets: He's just like... i just like I like ghosts. I like demons. I just want to build this thing.
Zach Sheets: I read this book about this guy.
Chris Prime: But I guess like. He tried that and that's what blew the family fortune.
Zach Sheets: He blew it all in his and his insane house. Is it saying like modern? Super butter house.
Chris Prime: post -industrial house
Zach Sheets: Mm hmm.
Chris Prime: He wants to look like he lives in a clock, but... Like... Also like a fine China store. That's possessed.
Zach Sheets: But yes, I think they'll do it for this week. Wrapping up the the spooky season. And I come back next week. We're diving into a Godzilla classic because we got Godzilla minus zero coming out next week. Which i I've heard, like... I've heard reviews saying it's like the best Godzilla movie ever made.
Zach Sheets: So we'll have to hopefully see but if that's true or not. But we're going to watch a... one of the one of the big like monster mash ones where like you know everyone's there
Zach Sheets: Which I think the the full title, it's like... Mothra, Godzilla. King Ghidorah, giant monsters all all out attack.
Zach Sheets: the You know, the most like... Simple, simple like, roll of the tongue title for a Godzilla movie.
Chris Prime: Yep, easy to remember.
Zach Sheets: But yeah, that's on Netflix. We're going to... All the... That's the monster action next week. And head over to Sleipnagel for all your stuff there. We've got news, reviews, trailers. We're going to have our Gamebox 2 .0 game reviews up soon, so definitely keep an eye out for that. look Check out those outs. I got review a review of Clayface. If you want to read my review of that, the latest DC Studios movie. It's up on the site.
Zach Sheets: And all the usual features up there as well. Check all stuff out. And I guess for Chris and I, I'm Zach, and we will see you next week.
