Transcript
Speaker: Bigger talks, bigger talks, and we're back, and we have a phenomenal episode, and where do I start, Natalie?
Speaker: McMillian.
Speaker: Start where?
Speaker: McMillan, right?
Speaker: McMillan, yeah.
Speaker: I wanted to say McMillion.
Speaker: Okay, I know.
Speaker: I'm like McMillionaire.
Speaker: That's my rap name, but everybody makes that mistake.
Speaker: Why is that?
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: everybody puts i a n so i usually just spell it you're just a millionaire that's a mcmillionaire yeah mcmillionaire so how are you today good how you feeling good i feel i feel good there is like an energy yes we talked about that before we got on yeah on this podcast yeah guys so today
Speaker: I came in and the engineer shouts out to Nettie and the studio hits in history.
Speaker: And I was like, hey, how's your day?
Speaker: And she's like, oh, it's a day.
Speaker: It's a day.
Speaker: And then Natalie came.
Speaker: I was like, Natalie, how's your day?
Speaker: She's like, oh, it's a day.
Speaker: And I said, oh, yeah, that's how my day went.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like, it's not bad.
Speaker: It's not great, but it's all right.
Speaker: It's life.
Speaker: It's life.
Speaker: It's one of those days that's just like a life day.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So you're here.
Speaker: Thank you for being on the podcast.
Speaker: You have nice nails.
Speaker: Oh, thank you so much.
Speaker: Beautiful eyes.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: So you're into jewelry really heavy.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And you're creative.
Speaker: I've read that.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: You're from the Bay Area.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And you're into mental health.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And you got this thing about F it, fuck it rules, right?
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: We're breaking the rules.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We're going to unpack all that.
Speaker: But before we get started, let's talk about you and how you grew up and how did you get into the jewelry business?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So I grew up in the Bay, like you said, and it's actually all kind of tied in because I was raised in a, it was, it was like a, it was a cult.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And there were lots of rules and that might also like lend to why I'm against it.
Speaker: Against rules.
Speaker: um well against rules um but one of the rules was that you couldn't wear jewelry and i loved jewelry you know ever since i was in preschool i would like make little necklaces and stuff and um i was just i was trying to find ways around it i would wear like hair ties and like you know they were fed up with me always but
Speaker: You know, I went through school and got to college and I knew I was going to be an art major, but I didn't know what or and I had never considered that jewelry was like a career option.
Speaker: Why didn't you guys?
Speaker: Why couldn't you wear jewelry in school?
Speaker: Something about you're not a school was it?
Speaker: It was, it's like a religious cult.
Speaker: Catholic?
Speaker: No, it's Seventh Day Adventist.
Speaker: I've heard of that.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: It's interesting.
Speaker: So actually, I grew up like in the town where it was like created.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So.
Speaker: Foundation.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So it's very, it's like a hardcore sector of it.
Speaker: But yeah, you weren't allowed to wear jewelry.
Speaker: You couldn't eat spicy food.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Very weird thing.
Speaker: Yeah, wow.
Speaker: So you had some real rules.
Speaker: Some real rules.
Speaker: So even though you had that maybe negative connotation or reaction to it, what was good about the rules for you if you had to look back on it?
Speaker: I think when I look back at that whole experience, I'm proud of little me because I never broke out of who I was.
Speaker: You know, they really tried.
Speaker: They really tried.
Speaker: It didn't work.
Speaker: And it never worked.
Speaker: And not in like I was a bad student or like causing problems, but I just sort of remained myself.
Speaker: And I don't know if I'm just like an old soul or something, but, you know, they would say things that made no sense.
Speaker: And I would just sort of think like.
Speaker: That does not track, you know.
Speaker: And so I think that was nice because when we're kids, I think it's easy to get lost in.
Speaker: whatever environment you're in absolutely and we were talking a little bit about like inner child yeah and how it's affected it's it affects us as adults um and so i feel like i'm proud of myself for staying the same because i feel like i'm the same person that i've been forever right and i always say life is a classroom right yeah and it has levels of classes depending on where you're at internally mentally emotionally spiritually yeah
Speaker: And so we spoke briefly about a new book I'm reading called Taming an Outer Child.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And the outer child is the misbehavior in the actions of the inner child.
Speaker: because the inner child wants love, it wants affection, it wants attention, wants to be heard, seen and felt.
Speaker: And sometimes due to trauma or pain or challenges, we don't get that.
Speaker: So then the outer child wants to be in control.
Speaker: Like, no, I'm breaking the rules.
Speaker: Nope, I'm going to have this donut.
Speaker: I'm not going to work out.
Speaker: I'm not going to get up on time.
Speaker: And so it becomes like the ego and the subconscious, and it just, it lashes out and takes over.
Speaker: And sometimes if you're not aware,
Speaker: So in the book, it talks about the inner, the outer, and then the adult.
Speaker: The adult comes in, which is the adult you, and controls the outer with the inner.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was on the phone earlier with my therapist.
Speaker: She said, yes, it's good to be disciplined and tamed, Eric, but the outer child wants to have fun.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Sometimes I can be so disciplined that...
Speaker: It's not that I don't want to play and enjoy.
Speaker: I'm just like, ah, I got to get this done.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's just like you still got to allow that part of you to explore and enjoy your journey.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's so hard.
Speaker: You know, it's easy to get caught up in it, especially, I think, when you're doing things that you really love and are really passionate about because –
Speaker: you know, you have an idea and you're like, Oh my God, I'm going to do it.
Speaker: And then you're just like, do you know, you put all your time and effort into it.
Speaker: Um, and then, you know, you want immediate progress and all this stuff.
Speaker: And it's, um, when you take a step back and look at life more like macro instead of micro, it's like, it's not that serious.
Speaker: It's not that serious.
Speaker: And is that, that's so great that you said that because I want to transition into about intuition and entrepreneurship and business.
Speaker: But to go back to that point, I'm actually in the space of enjoying the micro aspect of... I've always been the macro, big picture.
Speaker: What are we doing?
Speaker: I don't care about the details.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But I understand them.
Speaker: Now it's like, show up daily, get the micro work.
Speaker: The macro's going to come.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But in the same process, the outer child lacks patience.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And I want what I want when I want it.
Speaker: And then I ask myself, okay, if you have it right now, now what?
Speaker: You have everything.
Speaker: So what are you talking about?
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: And then you really do.
Speaker: I was talking with my therapist on Tuesday and it was sort of, she, she kind of was showing me that I sort of like deny reality in certain ways, negative and positive.
Speaker: So like we're working on this situation and I'm, it's a negative situation, but I'm looking at it in a positive light.
Speaker: That's like,
Speaker: actually not the truth, you know?
Speaker: And so it's hard to, it's hard to, I lost my train of thought.
Speaker: No, so you said you had a negative situation and you was trying to look at it in a positive way, but even though it wasn't positive, it didn't connect.
Speaker: By the way, what sign are you?
Speaker: Sagittarius.
Speaker: That's what it is.
Speaker: Are you?
Speaker: I was thinking this whole time what your sign was.
Speaker: What are you a fire sign?
Speaker: What you think I am?
Speaker: You think I'm a Sag, Aries?
Speaker: What's the other fire?
Speaker: Leo.
Speaker: Leo.
Speaker: So I'm a Pisces, but my moon sign is a Sagittarius.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: So that's why I understand the optics of being positive and looking at it from the sunny side of things.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Optimistic, adventurous.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So I was like, she might be a Sag.
Speaker: Yeah, I am a Sag.
Speaker: I'm like very Sag, like my whole chart.
Speaker: What day?
Speaker: The 20th, December 20th.
Speaker: Oh, wow.
Speaker: I have a client, same birthday.
Speaker: Energy, that fire, you can feel it.
Speaker: And something about Sagittarius women, I want to get so deep into astrology.
Speaker: They really do well in business.
Speaker: Oh, that's interesting.
Speaker: Or they know how to make money.
Speaker: Or they're like, a lot of my Sagittarius, you know, girlfriends that I know, they make good money.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And they're very business savvy.
Speaker: Yeah, I think that Sagittarius women and part of the, you know, kind of balancing life thing is we're extremely driven, but also we'll have fun.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Like, if I'm not having fun, I am not, you know, we got to change some things.
Speaker: So I think that we can sort of find that balance.
Speaker: But it's hard.
Speaker: You have to actively...
Speaker: actively do it and that's the thing like i know how to have fun i can turn it on like this hey let's have fun we going out it's friday july 1st good god but i need to get work done right yes so then i have a lot of capricorn in my child so that brings i'm very focused very serious and so it's just we we could talk about it another time but anyway to go back to your point you was talking about
Speaker: talking to your therapist on Tuesday.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And then you was looking at a negative situation from a positive perspective.
Speaker: Positively.
Speaker: But it wasn't actually positive.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: But I don't know.
Speaker: I was answering one of your questions and then I don't know what the question was.
Speaker: And you know what?
Speaker: That's the most beautiful thing about life.
Speaker: Because I don't know if you've seen the video with Kanye West.
Speaker: He's like, if you always try to say the right answer, then you're off.
Speaker: And life becomes a test.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You know, it's like, you didn't remember, and it's okay.
Speaker: It was something about inner and outer child, I'm sure.
Speaker: But I don't know where I was headed with it.
Speaker: But I also have ADHD.
Speaker: Hey.
Speaker: So things come and go.
Speaker: Come and go.
Speaker: And that's the thing about life.
Speaker: I was listening to a podcast.
Speaker: I think it's Lisa Unwinding.
Speaker: Lisa Gilmore.
Speaker: And so I wanted to bring this up because it was so fascinating.
Speaker: I was like, wow, for her to kind of like get to this point of her brain to kind of...
Speaker: unpack and like really take out of what you were trying to talk about so you was talking about working out right uh-huh fitness and you was like i was taking two soul cycle classes a day and then but my body was really sore and pain it's just like what am i doing and it's keto this and i was like wow
Speaker: wow, this is so real and so beautiful because people follow other people that they think they should follow because they are experts in that.
Speaker: And so when I'm training someone, I'm like, what works best for you?
Speaker: You might can't do a burpee, but maybe you can get up and get up, get up and get, get up and stand up and 10 times.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I'm a jump 10 times.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: You don't have to jump.
Speaker: Do what works for you.
Speaker: And so I think going back to when you were younger, following your own counsel, right?
Speaker: Following your own and always going about talking about intuition.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Following what feels right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I think that that whole workout aspect that I was speaking about was being connected to my body because I've always been very intuitive.
Speaker: But I do think, you know, through childhood and through
Speaker: difficult experiences I kind of like left like dissociated yeah um and through that yeah I wasn't it was like I was doing two workouts a day and like my joints hurt and like I was like swollen and you know it was like not good um
Speaker: but I could just ignore it because I wasn't tapped into my own like being.
Speaker: Cause that's what you were saying about your therapist is like, you're like in, you're not in reality, the good or the bad.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: I try to like shift it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Um, yeah.
Speaker: Good situations.
Speaker: I think because it's a protection thing.
Speaker: I'm like, if something's too good, I'm like, okay, it can't be this good.
Speaker: Oh, that's what I was going to say that you were saying, um, that you've got everything in life.
Speaker: Like, you know,
Speaker: and I was talking to her on Tuesday, it's come back, that I was like, to be honest, I have, like, I love my life.
Speaker: I have everything that I've wanted.
Speaker: Like, I love my career, I love my friends, I love where I live.
Speaker: And all of the anxieties and things that I feel are like a different reality.
Speaker: It's not the truth.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: I like trick myself to be anxious.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: Is that a defense mechanism so you can feel safe?
Speaker: I think it's so I can feel safe because if anything's too good, it's like, when's the when's the shoe going to drop?
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: So it's like I have to look for something.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: And usually if you look for it, you'll find it.
Speaker: And you'll find it.
Speaker: I knew it.
Speaker: And that's what happened to me at an early age, you know, suffering from like this.
Speaker: This book is about emotional abandonment issues.
Speaker: Anytime I will meet someone, I will already have in the back of my mind.
Speaker: I already have my way out.
Speaker: So I won't feel the effect of the pain.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Instead of looking at it like, well, what if this person is a great person?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You're already counseling yourself out of a great opportunity to meet someone who's probably sent to help you.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Or heal you or love you.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so it's so interesting because there's a, I forget the instructor, her name, but she teaches you how to expand your receiving paradigm, right?
Speaker: When it comes to money.
Speaker: And life and business.
Speaker: And so she said, the reason most of us can't expand our receiving paradigm when it comes to money is
Speaker: It's because of our nervous system.
Speaker: She said, I read the books.
Speaker: I took the courses.
Speaker: I went to the seminars.
Speaker: Why can't I make money in my business?
Speaker: She said, because your nervous system doesn't feel safe.
Speaker: Say if someone makes a quarter million a year and they can't go above that.
Speaker: It's like their nervous system.
Speaker: It's not allowing them to, based on their perceptions, their reality, what they believe, right?
Speaker: You're creating the story.
Speaker: So she said, think about it.
Speaker: When you receive money, how do you feel?
Speaker: More so, check in with your nervous system.
Speaker: Then there's people who make tons of money, but they can't keep it.
Speaker: So that nervous system is like, oh, I got all this money.
Speaker: Let me get rid of it.
Speaker: Right, right.
Speaker: And it's so subconscious.
Speaker: The subconscious mind is fascinating.
Speaker: And that's what she was saying.
Speaker: And I always say, the body keeps the score.
Speaker: That's a great book.
Speaker: And your body is your business.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And you are the parent of your body, just like a parent would be to a child.
Speaker: So whatever you give it, feed it, it's going to embrace and endure because it only knows you.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I think that that to your point about people just follow other people.
Speaker: And I think with social media, it's also kind of taken its own course.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But every, every body is different and require different, you know,
Speaker: Some people love eating a lot of meat.
Speaker: Some people are like, I don't really like it that much.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: And I think that if you really pay attention to your body and if you can really like check in with yourself, you will give yourself what you need.
Speaker: say that again if you check in with yourself and you really feel it you will give yourself what you need because that's your intuition your subconscious mind right yes yes so if you're like hmm like you know there's some days where i'm like for breakfast you know it's like i should right quote unquote have like protein and
Speaker: carbs, you know, like, like the, you know, the oatmeal with whatever.
Speaker: And sometimes I'm like, you know, what sounds really good?
Speaker: Just like a ton of fruit.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I feel great the whole day, you know, flow, you got to follow the flow.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: It's just like, you have to pay attention to what your body is saying to you because it does hold the score.
Speaker: Um, and it does, it has messages and it's so interesting.
Speaker: I was thinking last night about how, um,
Speaker: There's like two people in your head.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: It's like because you're saying when you say, oh, I said to myself.
Speaker: So who is the I and who is the self?
Speaker: Break it down.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: So it's like I think when those two can communicate, whatever it is, I don't know if it's subconscious, whatever.
Speaker: I mean, we all say that.
Speaker: Oh, I said to myself.
Speaker: Who are those people or beings or whatever it is?
Speaker: I think if they can communicate in a way that I think you can.
Speaker: It's how you can progress.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: You got to build that foundation with oneself.
Speaker: I think a lot of us build.
Speaker: a lot of the flesh, right?
Speaker: The external us, right?
Speaker: I got to get this jewelry.
Speaker: I got to watch this watch.
Speaker: I got to date this person.
Speaker: I got to have these amount of followers.
Speaker: I got to take this course.
Speaker: I got to drive this car.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Take all that away.
Speaker: Who are you?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I think when you get to the core of who you are, then you'll understand why you want the
Speaker: physical material things.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like, Oh, I don't really need this.
Speaker: Or I was into this person, but why?
Speaker: It was like the idea of them.
Speaker: Oh yeah.
Speaker: It's always the substance of who they are.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Cause people were not what we do.
Speaker: What we do is not who we are.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But we like to identify our profession as our real internal self.
Speaker: And it's like,
Speaker: Yeah, I do motivation and I'm positive, but I'm a real person.
Speaker: I wake up with heavy emotions.
Speaker: I don't want to talk to people every day.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But I understand what I'm here to do on earth.
Speaker: I know my mission.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: It took a lot of work to get there.
Speaker: And it's still more work.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And again, it's so hard to separate yourself.
Speaker: And I don't know if that's also just like growing up in a country that's very, you know, work driven and your value is based on your productivity.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And so especially I think if you've gone through some stuff as a kid, you might value yourself based on your productivity easier than...
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Or you didn't value yourself.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And now you've grown too.
Speaker: And now you're learning like, what does that look like?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like my challenge was like receiving.
Speaker: I didn't know how to receive.
Speaker: Oh, it's, it's, it sounds crazy, but it is hard.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: My friend was like, E, why don't you just ask for help?
Speaker: I was like, I don't know how to.
Speaker: I don't do that.
Speaker: I don't do that.
Speaker: I don't know how to ask for help.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Why don't you celebrate your wins?
Speaker: I was like,
Speaker: I really don't know how to.
Speaker: He's like, what do you mean?
Speaker: I'm like, it might sound crazy, but I'm being honest.
Speaker: I can celebrate you.
Speaker: I'm the same way.
Speaker: I didn't get celebrated as a kid, so I don't understand it in a way where it makes sense to the majority.
Speaker: It's like, that's simple.
Speaker: To you it is.
Speaker: To me it's foreign because it's never happened in a way where I can subconsciously recall it.
Speaker: Like, oh, this is what celebrating myself look like.
Speaker: So when I journal...
Speaker: I'm proud of me.
Speaker: I love you.
Speaker: You're worthy.
Speaker: I have to do these things to kind of be in sync with that other self, right?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And connect the two.
Speaker: It's so beautiful.
Speaker: So I did read up on, you say you work with, hopefully I say this right, LBGTQ community?
Speaker: Did I say it right?
Speaker: In minority, women, right?
Speaker: For your business?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: What sparked that interest and where did that come from?
Speaker: I think, you know, when I first started out, it was just me.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And it's still for the most part is just me.
Speaker: But I, I don't know.
Speaker: Are you big on diversity?
Speaker: Yes, yes, yes.
Speaker: And it was just sort of like,
Speaker: why would I, and I, I don't mean to say this like dunking on white men.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But like, why would I hire a white man to do something that a white man doesn't really understand?
Speaker: Like, absolutely.
Speaker: You know, and I had this one guy who he was like emailing me and like over and over.
Speaker: Cause he wanted to, uh, pitch me his like Facebook ad service or whatever.
Speaker: And so finally I'm like, all right.
Speaker: I gave him the call.
Speaker: We had the chat and he was like, all right, so we're going to sign up.
Speaker: And I was like, oh no, I'm sorry.
Speaker: I only work with women, people of color.
Speaker: And he was like, oh, like, cause they aren't told no.
Speaker: Oh wow.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: Hold on, hold on.
Speaker: Say that again.
Speaker: White men are not told no.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: I've never heard that.
Speaker: So he was just like kind of stunned, I think.
Speaker: And it shouldn't be like that.
Speaker: It shouldn't.
Speaker: You're right.
Speaker: It's crazy.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: But, you know, I always say, like, the girls and the gays, we're just, like, you know, doing my jewelry and having fun.
Speaker: And we have an understanding of one another.
Speaker: And I think that working with people that have your same values is very important.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because if you don't have the same value, what are we here for?
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Like, even if a person...
Speaker: You can get along with a person, but you better not share the same value.
Speaker: So I want to be around someone who share the same.
Speaker: I mean, I've had to get rid of friends because of that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I did.
Speaker: I value my time.
Speaker: I value what I put in my body.
Speaker: I value the things I give my time and energy to.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Not that what you're doing is wrong.
Speaker: We're just not in alignment.
Speaker: And it's right.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But I'm not trying to hold on to this friendship or this relationship because it's not serving me right now.
Speaker: I also think that it's, and I say this all the time, you either grow together, like, you know, let's say you're friends from young, you grow together or you grow apart, like in a spiritual sense, you know, the growth, because, and I think a lot of people see it like in their early mid twenties where it's like, okay, I'm at this place, but this person that I once knew that I has been my friend forever is like,
Speaker: like way over here.
Speaker: And so you think, well, I should keep, keep this person around.
Speaker: When in reality, it's like, you kind of have to accept that things do change.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it goes back to this notion of you have love story and you have life story, right?
Speaker: You can love someone.
Speaker: I love you.
Speaker: I'm so in love, but can we do life together?
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And maybe we can't.
Speaker: So I can still love you, but maybe we can't do life because it's not, because I always look at it like if we're not on the same frequency or the same vibe or we're not aligned, I'm hurting you and you're hurting me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because I'm not giving you what you need in this moment and you can't give me what I need.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that's okay.
Speaker: But I think people, at least where I come from, we try to keep people around, force, like,
Speaker: No, it's cool.
Speaker: You can just, or, you know, people get to get up a great opportunity.
Speaker: They want to put their friends on.
Speaker: It's like, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: You got to be qualified.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because sometimes just because you're my friend doesn't mean you can do great in business or you can help my business.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: It could hurt it.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And it's, I just try to come correct because sometimes people can't handle the truth, right?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They can't handle it.
Speaker: And I'm all about being authentic.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And transparent.
Speaker: Me too.
Speaker: Because it saves time, it saves energy.
Speaker: And look, no doesn't hurt.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: No is a complete sentence.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Right?
Speaker: You can say no.
Speaker: I always say, tell me no and I'll leave you alone.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Simple as that.
Speaker: It's so simple.
Speaker: You know, but I do think maybe people are afraid to be their complete authentic self if they don't know who they are entirely.
Speaker: I've been there before.
Speaker: People pleasing syndrome.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Don't know how to create boundaries.
Speaker: Absolutely not.
Speaker: Say yes to everything.
Speaker: Yeah, I'll do it.
Speaker: Yeah, I'll do it.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: You get home like I'm burnt out.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: No one's checking on you.
Speaker: You don't want to hurt anybody else's feelings, but you have no idea what you're doing.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You're just making sure everybody else is fine.
Speaker: And it's I always wonder.
Speaker: I know where it comes from, from doing so much research and work.
Speaker: But then I started thinking, like, wow, it's kind of selfish to be a people pleaser because you're manipulating people to love you.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: You know, it's like, I'm going to do this for you because I want that love or I want that attention.
Speaker: I want you to, because my whole thing was because I didn't get it, I had to discover a way to get it that was inauthentic.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But was real to them.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I'm gonna take you to the airport, whatever you need to have.
Speaker: Then it's like, oh, you can always call me.
Speaker: You can always be my friend.
Speaker: Because I was dying.
Speaker: I was afraid of separation.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I don't want to be left alone.
Speaker: So I'm gonna just do everything to stay in this vibe or this vortex.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: It's just not healthy.
Speaker: And when you think of it realistically, it's like, all right, if, and again, back to the like reality thing.
Speaker: The reality is if you've got a friend and you're like, oh my God, if I don't take them to the airport, they're going to just like leave, abandon me.
Speaker: Like they're gone.
Speaker: That's not gonna, it's probably not gonna happen.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: But I think it's, uh, it's just easy for that to be the initial thought and to just kind of run with it.
Speaker: And it's a protection mechanism.
Speaker: You're protecting yourself from being hurt.
Speaker: Like I said before, in relationships, I will always have a backdoor escape rope.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Like, I'm out.
Speaker: Or, I knew this was going to happen.
Speaker: And then it happens.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Because you're preparing yourself for it.
Speaker: You create your reality, I swear.
Speaker: So, for your business, how long have you been in business as a designer?
Speaker: It will be six years in August.
Speaker: And how's that journey been?
Speaker: It's been so interesting because it has been more of a spiritual and like a self journey than a business journey, you know?
Speaker: Just I think I've learned so much about myself through the things that I've learned in business and the lessons and the ups and the downs that I know myself so much more, you know, as you took those chances.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that's what I always said was I had a thought earlier before I got here.
Speaker: I said, you know, it's funny about having any type of success in life publicly at home and in house with your family or just whatever you're doing.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You get there, you work hard to become the jeweler, the designer, the creative.
Speaker: Great.
Speaker: Now you got to see, can you stand on what you created?
Speaker: And then can you make it bigger?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And can you scale it?
Speaker: Can you sustain that?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then people don't talk about that part.
Speaker: They just talk about, you got to work hard.
Speaker: You got to keep going.
Speaker: And then you get there, you score the touchdowns.
Speaker: You're like, Oh, then you realize like, Oh, it's another level.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But then it's like, now there's more expected of me.
Speaker: Everything I just gained from that to that.
Speaker: How do I sustain that for my long period of time where
Speaker: Things are changing.
Speaker: People are changing.
Speaker: Times are changing.
Speaker: Inflation.
Speaker: You know, loved ones.
Speaker: Relationships.
Speaker: And that's the part of entrepreneurship that I tell people.
Speaker: Be careful what you wish for.
Speaker: But who are you?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Because being an entrepreneur, solopreneur, self-employed, independent contractor, you always got to look at yourself.
Speaker: You always got to believe.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I think especially a lot of people that are just starting out and I was this same way is you're so because a lot of the time it's something that you're really passionate about or something you really believe in or really love.
Speaker: And so when you're for me, at least in my experience, my jewelry and my art and everything I do is like so personal to me.
Speaker: And I put so much of myself into it that.
Speaker: In the beginning, I was like, I kind of just want to hide.
Speaker: I don't really want people to buy this or know me or anything.
Speaker: Because if they don't like it, that feels like they don't like me.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And that's what people don't talk about is the sensitivity that comes with creating something that's yours.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Even though you know you got to put it out on the market, you got to take the chances, you got to push it out, you're still like, okay, I got a new t-shirt.
Speaker: You guys like it?
Speaker: I got an app out.
Speaker: You got to get new jewelry, you know, necklaces.
Speaker: You have to build that confidence.
Speaker: And it does.
Speaker: And I think that has taken me a lot of time, too.
Speaker: And then you get to a point where you're comfortable and you're just like, okay, I don't care if it fails, but I'm going to push it.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: I think Tyler Curator said that.
Speaker: He's like, I don't understand these new artists.
Speaker: They make a song.
Speaker: They do a hook.
Speaker: They get it done, do the beat, and then it's out.
Speaker: And then they just drop it on their story and then that's it.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: They didn't put all that energy and time and they're like, what's wrong with people?
Speaker: You should be proud of what you created.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: Because it's like they put something out and then it's like, all right, what's the next one?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And so it's, but let's talk about breaking rules.
Speaker: I don't like rules.
Speaker: I don't like them either.
Speaker: Especially when you're trying to get me to do something that my soul knows is not for me.
Speaker: Oh, there's no way.
Speaker: There's no way I'm doing it.
Speaker: I don't care how much logic or science you can say.
Speaker: I don't feel that.
Speaker: It's like, yeah, but there's no but.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: It's like, how can I tell you what you feel and how you should feel based on information I have that I think I know about you?
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And I had a friend one day, he said, some person challenged him and he was like, don't you think there's something I know about myself that you don't?
Speaker: That part.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And I think it happens a lot in business when it comes to your friends and your family.
Speaker: They have strong opinions.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And you have to go against even the people you love the most.
Speaker: It could be your spouse.
Speaker: It could be your brother or your sister or your best friend.
Speaker: You have to really hold on to your truths and go to your flow, what you believe in.
Speaker: So how did you get to that space where you said, you know what?
Speaker: I mean, you said it started early, but how did you know like, no, no, no, I can't do that.
Speaker: I have to stay in alignment with I know, even if it doesn't make sense to the majority.
Speaker: Yeah, I think, well, first of all, just to your point about the friends and the family thing is, I was thinking about this the other day.
Speaker: Nobody on earth actually really sees you the exact way you see yourself.
Speaker: Like we see ourselves and our souls and everything as one way, but somebody else can see it in a completely different way.
Speaker: And then they project that onto you, what they think you are.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And so sometimes I feel resistance against that because I'm like, well, that's not who I am.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So like, don't put that on.
Speaker: I don't know where that's coming from.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: So I think, though, I like I said, I've had it kind of forever where I've just been very like I have to stick to my guns.
Speaker: But I think what helps me is.
Speaker: the evidence so internal or external external oh really okay so uh i feel like because there have been so many times now where i've taken the chance or i've done something that everybody says don't do that absolutely do not do that um making a perfume when i made a perfume everybody in my industry was like do not do that absolutely not it's like gonna your niche is gonna be all over the place nobody's gonna know what you are blah blah blah
Speaker: And I was just like, no, I have to.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: I have to.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And that perfume is like the best selling thing that I have.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Congratulations.
Speaker: Thank you.
Speaker: What's the name of it?
Speaker: It's called Blood Sugar Baby.
Speaker: Blood Sugar Baby.
Speaker: Give you some sugar from that blood, baby.
Speaker: Smell good.
Speaker: Get over here, girl.
Speaker: You want a drink or you want some water?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, but it's, but it worked.
Speaker: Was that a gut?
Speaker: Was that an intuition decision for you?
Speaker: Like, no, I have to stick to my guns?
Speaker: Or you were just more like the outer child wants to be in control.
Speaker: I want to do my thing.
Speaker: No, no.
Speaker: Well, I think it was more internal because I really did.
Speaker: I sought advice of my friends, my family, industry peers, people who have worked in it for 30 years.
Speaker: And, you know, everybody kind of had the same like, I don't know, like maybe you should just focus on, you know, because I was still a pretty young business.
Speaker: But there was just some feeling where I was like, I'm so I have to.
Speaker: I have to do it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so then I got that like positive reinforcement, that like external validation where I was like, oh, it worked.
Speaker: It worked.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then another time was, and everybody was like, you're crazy, do not do that, was pulling out of retail.
Speaker: Pulling everything out of retail and going direct to consumer.
Speaker: Which, again... So elaborate.
Speaker: You say pull out of retail, go direct to consumer.
Speaker: So instead of having jewelry online, you would have it online and in stores.
Speaker: And so in the past, that's been extremely important
Speaker: for jewelry designers because that like the having the eyes on it in the case is, you know, yeah.
Speaker: Advertising.
Speaker: Um, and a lot of people have gotten their start, you know, Barney's and all of these different places, uh, from being in the case.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I had a gut feeling one day and I don't even know what it was, but I was like, I have to go direct to consumer, which means,
Speaker: Just through my website, just through me.
Speaker: So I'm cutting out the middleman.
Speaker: So then I can also give a better price to my customers because there's no retail markup.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that was something that was important to me as well because I wanted to be more accessible.
Speaker: And everyone, especially in my industry, they were like, that is a nail in a coffin.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: you know, and I, and I'm not a huge, it's not like I'm well known, you know, it's like, it was a big risk.
Speaker: Um, and I was like, I have to do it.
Speaker: I have to do it.
Speaker: I'm going to do it.
Speaker: And, uh, that was the summer of 2019.
Speaker: That's interesting.
Speaker: And then what happened?
Speaker: 2020.
Speaker: And I was way ahead of everybody else because all of my jewelry designer peers were like, were, you know, they had to,
Speaker: create their websites they had to like learn all the e-commerce stuff because they had relied so heavily on so you were on the consumer then online or you were online then consumer when you started your business
Speaker: I've always been online.
Speaker: Uh, but when I first started, I was online and in stores.
Speaker: Oh, you were, I see you.
Speaker: I saw that you did a, um, Puma collab.
Speaker: Was it Puma?
Speaker: Oh, with Puma.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: How did that come about?
Speaker: Uh, you know, my, my friend now, I first hired her as a, as a photographer for one of my look books.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: And we've just become friends because we've done a lot of them at this point.
Speaker: And she texted me one day or DM me or something.
Speaker: And she was like, hey, I'm doing a campaign.
Speaker: And I don't think she told me who it was at first.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And she was like, can I use some of your jewelry for it?
Speaker: And I was like, of course.
Speaker: Like, come by.
Speaker: I'll give you what you need, whatever.
Speaker: And then she shot it, and she was like, oh, it was for Puma.
Speaker: And I was like, oh, my God.
Speaker: So, yeah, that was a cool.
Speaker: Relationships run the world.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: And they're all very genuine, too.
Speaker: Yeah, I want to go back to you making that gut decision and going against the grain.
Speaker: So it came to me in that moment, I channeled a thought of, like,
Speaker: I want to know if that's part of like a past life thing for you.
Speaker: Maybe in a past life, you always listen to everybody and things didn't pan out for you.
Speaker: And in this lifetime, you have to go against what people say.
Speaker: And that's how you win.
Speaker: Because what if that's a pattern to your success?
Speaker: Yeah, because it's kind of like case study.
Speaker: But those two stories, I'm like, well, these are similar activities.
Speaker: And you won.
Speaker: It's kind of like gambling on yourself, betting on yourself.
Speaker: But it's like when the stakes are high and people are like, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: And little you, the intuition is like, yes, we got to do this.
Speaker: And then you win.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's not to say that I'm not completely afraid.
Speaker: Oh yeah.
Speaker: Cause it's like, Oh my God.
Speaker: And I've also done it with, um, having to move.
Speaker: I've had weird things where I'm like, Oh my God, I have to move.
Speaker: And then I'm like, Oh no.
Speaker: Now that I know this information, I'm like, Oh, I hate moving.
Speaker: Um, but I mean the last time I moved, which was like three years ago, um, I had this like gut feeling like, Oh God, I have to move.
Speaker: And, um,
Speaker: It came to find out there was black mold in the apartment.
Speaker: So you must be very intuitive.
Speaker: Do you know like your moon and rising sign?
Speaker: Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: I'm Aries moon, Gemini rising, and then I'm Sag.
Speaker: Sun, Venus, Mercury, Mars.
Speaker: Chiron.
Speaker: Do you travel a lot?
Speaker: Do you party a lot?
Speaker: Do you have fun?
Speaker: Do you play?
Speaker: Are you ever in any committed relationships?
Speaker: Nope.
Speaker: Committed to being uncommitted.
Speaker: That's the thing about my Sag Moon.
Speaker: It's like a minute, a minute, a minute.
Speaker: I'm like, ah, you know, I'll just take a drink of water over here.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: Actually, I really try to work on it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's like partially it's, I think, just the Sag, like, do not box me in thing.
Speaker: Yeah, do not box me in.
Speaker: And also, like, this is also on me, you know?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: But that's a lot of Sagittarius placements.
Speaker: Yeah, it's a lot.
Speaker: I have, like, no Earth.
Speaker: None.
Speaker: I don't, I think.
Speaker: What about water?
Speaker: Uh, so I've got the Pisces.
Speaker: Where's that?
Speaker: Uh, I think it's like Saturn or Jupiter.
Speaker: It's not one of the, um.
Speaker: Oh, okay.
Speaker: It's not Mercury.
Speaker: It's not Mars.
Speaker: No, it's, it's not one of the like out inner planets.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: Maybe it's Jupiter or Saturn or Uranus.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Neptune.
Speaker: And one of them is like generational though.
Speaker: Oh, okay.
Speaker: Like each generation has like the same one.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I think it's Pluto or something.
Speaker: Maybe Pluto.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I don't know.
Speaker: Do you know your life path number and like human design?
Speaker: Are you into that?
Speaker: I don't know life path.
Speaker: I do know I'm a manifesting generator.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, that makes sense.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Always have to do a million things.
Speaker: You got to do a million things.
Speaker: And I'm a generator.
Speaker: So go back to like, we were talking about the diet and working out.
Speaker: And so I work out a lot, but if it's something that's going to excite me, like if I see a cupcake or some gummy bears, that's going to light me up.
Speaker: I should eat it because that generates and amplifies my energy.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: But if it's something like, I'm just tired of this meal prep.
Speaker: So here's a controversial opinion.
Speaker: Well, probably not to you, but for people that are more like scientific, probably.
Speaker: I genuinely think that the energy that you have towards what you're eating affects it.
Speaker: So I really believe, and I said this on that unwinding podcast that you had mentioned, that I decide what nourishes me.
Speaker: So...
Speaker: I tap in and I'm like, you know, what sound, I mean, it's intuitive eating, right?
Speaker: It's like, what sounds good?
Speaker: What would feel good?
Speaker: Blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: But also, yeah, if I see a cupcake or if I'm out with my friends and there's like some fun thing, it's like, I think a lot of girls are like, I can't have it.
Speaker: Or if they, if they do have it, it's like, oh my God, now I'm going to have to like go run a mile, like all this stuff.
Speaker: And that adds such a negative and stressful, um,
Speaker: And it's tough because you get all these downloads and information from the world.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But then your body is giving you something different.
Speaker: I was telling my therapist earlier, I was like, I'm a generator.
Speaker: So a lot of my energy comes from my sacral where your joy and your pleasure.
Speaker: So sometimes I will suppress my lust or that.
Speaker: Not that it got to be sex, but you can lust over a lot of things.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Because I'm thinking like, oh, I need to be disciplined enough.
Speaker: But then it takes me off that chakra.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: And then it's like, I'm not.
Speaker: and align me at my highest capacity because I'm thinking because I have to be this way.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Instead, I've learned if I just let go and go do that, this actually gives me more energy to do this.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And it's just a better, you just feel better.
Speaker: You're like, oh, I'm more me.
Speaker: I feel free.
Speaker: I allow myself to just let go and just be.
Speaker: And I think the other thing that we do to ourselves, and again, I don't like rules, is
Speaker: We see ourselves in one way.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like, oh, this is who I am.
Speaker: This is how I am.
Speaker: And then if you sort of like cheat on that, then you're like, oh, what are you doing?
Speaker: Like, who are you?
Speaker: Even if it's not like a bad thing, you know, but we box ourselves in.
Speaker: And it's like, why don't we just allow ourselves to change?
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: If you want to.
Speaker: That's why it's so important to have the right people around you to give you real perspective.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I got a friend, shout out to BJ.
Speaker: He's always said, man, look what you're doing in life.
Speaker: You're a miracle.
Speaker: You got books, you got apps, you've been on TV.
Speaker: Some people don't even get a chance to do that.
Speaker: But I'm like, yeah, I'm in it and I'm on it.
Speaker: So I can't see that.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And that's why we need people around us to give us the real perspective on what's really happened versus what we believe.
Speaker: Denying reality.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Even if it's not what we want, we still got to come back from a place of gratitude, love, and joy to
Speaker: but what is happening?
Speaker: I was listening to a podcast and it said people get in discussions and they want to be right.
Speaker: And it was like, it's not about who's right.
Speaker: It's about what is right.
Speaker: You know, it's like, it's not about me having a different opinion and I feel like I'm right.
Speaker: And you feel like, no, but what is right about this?
Speaker: Oh, what's right about this is that you have your opinion.
Speaker: I have my opinion.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Tell me your opinion and break down your perspective.
Speaker: Oh, that's a different context.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I didn't see it like that.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know what?
Speaker: I apologize.
Speaker: You're right because I've never experienced that to have that impact.
Speaker: Thank you for being vulnerable.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Now I can see where you're coming from.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Instead of like, no, this is only the way.
Speaker: And you're like, no, everybody doesn't grow up like that.
Speaker: Yeah, I know.
Speaker: That is.
Speaker: But yeah.
Speaker: By the way, jewelry for men.
Speaker: Why don't they make jewelry for us?
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: You know, I get a charm.
Speaker: Can I get like something with some names on it?
Speaker: You know what I think it is, is I used to have some things for men, but they don't sell that well.
Speaker: That's what the mother client was telling me.
Speaker: It's like, yeah, they just, women buy everything.
Speaker: I'm like, just something small for a guy.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: Yeah, I used to have rings and I had like a, I think I had like a, a necklace.
Speaker: Or something unisex that you can kind of like blend in.
Speaker: Yes, yes.
Speaker: I like stuff with like sayings on it, like motivation.
Speaker: It's miracle season, clearly.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Faith, believe in yourself.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like giving keys is a company.
Speaker: They give keys and they put names on it.
Speaker: I like that.
Speaker: Oh, that's cool.
Speaker: It was like you can put like Miracle or what's it?
Speaker: My Intent Bracelet.
Speaker: I had like My Intent Bracelet for like three years.
Speaker: It has Supernatural on it.
Speaker: Oh, cool.
Speaker: So stuff that has meaning, but I would love like the one at the top that you have right there.
Speaker: Oh, this is it's like a Lucky Charm necklace.
Speaker: Yeah, that's dope.
Speaker: And do you know, we got a seven there as a seven, seven.
Speaker: And actually the penny thing, I have a penny on there.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And that's a very, that's another like spiritual thing is, um, I had this thing with my grandpa with pennies.
Speaker: Uh, and it's like, anytime I was, um, anytime there's ever been moments where I'm like, Oh my God, what's happening?
Speaker: Like, am I going to be okay?
Speaker: Uh,
Speaker: something I will find a penny in the most random place that like should not be there.
Speaker: One time I heard it hit the ground and I looked behind me.
Speaker: Nobody was there.
Speaker: I'm like looking around like what?
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: And so it's always been this like reassuring thing to me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: They say when you see two pennies or you see feathers on the ground, like that's your angels, like talking to you, like you're protected.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: So, so I really feel that.
Speaker: And that's why, you know, when I say I put so much of myself, I think that my customers don't even really know these things.
Speaker: Um,
Speaker: But it is so much of my self.
Speaker: It's meaningful.
Speaker: Yes, it's meaningful to me.
Speaker: And then people, I feel like the energy, go back to food, the energy you put into your jewelry, people can feel that when they see it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Oh, I want that, but they don't know why.
Speaker: You know, you put so much love and affection, and it's important to put the right energy and attention behind things.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: For spirituality, what does that mean to you?
Speaker: Because I think everybody likes to put it in a box, but it's different for everybody.
Speaker: God, that's a really hard question.
Speaker: It's, um, I think spirituality is, so I think, uh, there's kind of maybe a misconception with it being like its own religion kind of.
Speaker: Um, like if you say you're a spiritual person, it's like, oh, you know, you're, you have whatever you're doing over there.
Speaker: But really I think spirituality is the, your journey in life.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: It's what you learn and it's tapping into it consciously or being open to kind of consciously process what's going on and like thinking about this is bigger than me.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: This is, you know, there's something else going on beyond myself.
Speaker: I always say intuition is God thoughts, right?
Speaker: I think of Steve Jobs, like,
Speaker: how did this guy just create the Apple or iPhone?
Speaker: Like it was, I feel like we channeled that.
Speaker: Like it's Miracle Season was something I channeled.
Speaker: I didn't like come up with it while I was sitting down writing names.
Speaker: It came to me.
Speaker: Exactly.
Speaker: And that's that intuitive download where it's like, and I think that also is with, and I'm trying to lean into this more because I don't allow myself to have my desires.
Speaker: Like things that I have like always wanted and I'm like, oh, you know, those things are like your little breadcrumbs.
Speaker: It's like,
Speaker: The things that I want are completely different than the things that you want.
Speaker: And they're going to take us down different life paths.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it's the path that we're supposed to be on.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: And it's important because some things we want, we already have.
Speaker: We just can't see it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Like my therapist was telling me today.
Speaker: I was like, yeah, when?
Speaker: She's like, Eric, you're already there.
Speaker: And I'm like, ah, okay, I am there.
Speaker: So what makes me feel like I'm not there?
Speaker: What imagery, what self-image am I creating of myself?
Speaker: And the spirit, I always talk about spiritual currency.
Speaker: I have many clients that are affluent,
Speaker: they do well in business who were successful but sometimes they lack spiritual currency right that soul awareness that uh eq emotional intelligence when something goes off that's not in their control how can they control themselves yeah and i think
Speaker: having a spiritual connection with higher self with yourself is important for decision making uh the the perception you create about yourself the jewelry you create the friends you attract but we're programmed not to connect to ourselves you know your body holds all your power so when the body is out of alignment you can't really get access to that power that's been already given to you at a
Speaker: early age i don't know if you heard of esther hicks oh yeah of course yeah so esther hicks was talking about um us calibrating like our physicality like as people right but she was given example of basketball players you know they work out they shoot jump shots they work hard i'm getting good then the game comes and at the game you have fans you have coaches you have opponents so now you're challenged right just like the world we're challenged
Speaker: So that can trigger your thinking, your thoughts.
Speaker: You can be less confident.
Speaker: So she said, if we could calibrate our physicality, what if we did that on an internal and connect to that God-like source that's already in us?
Speaker: Then when things are out of whack or it's chaos outside of us, we're in control.
Speaker: Because we calibrated the internals.
Speaker: So I was like, oh, yeah, baby.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: I love when I get this.
Speaker: I'm like, oh, my God.
Speaker: It's so simple.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But are you reading any books right now?
Speaker: You know what?
Speaker: I'm reading Dave Grohl's biography.
Speaker: I've heard of the author, but I don't know the good name.
Speaker: He is the lead singer of Foo Fighters, but he was the drummer for Nirvana.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: And so he...
Speaker: It's not really a biography as much as he's telling all of these.
Speaker: stories from like his career um and i love i just love real stories yes i love documentaries love documentaries i love knowing the story of people and i just saw elvis have you seen elvis i haven't should i see it you should see it i should see it i'm gonna see it i loved it um but it was just so interesting because you know you you think of elvis and i'm i'm not really like an elvis fan so i was like am i even gonna like this movie i don't know
Speaker: But you get to know his whole story.
Speaker: You get to know his childhood.
Speaker: And I didn't know he was a twin.
Speaker: Oh.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And his brother was stillborn.
Speaker: And so his mom would tell him, you have the power of two men.
Speaker: That's interesting you say that.
Speaker: And I think he believed that.
Speaker: And you know what you believe?
Speaker: It happens.
Speaker: You achieve, right?
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: So I love learning people's stories, even if they're mundane.
Speaker: You definitely have to be tapped in because that's part of my story.
Speaker: Yeah, like I had a twin.
Speaker: Like she was a girl.
Speaker: She didn't make it.
Speaker: My mom said, that's why your energy is the way it is.
Speaker: She lives within you.
Speaker: But I found this out at 25.
Speaker: Oh, my God.
Speaker: So I didn't even know.
Speaker: And I go deep into like my chart.
Speaker: They say, I got Pluto in the first half, Scorpio.
Speaker: And it's like usually these people are intense, they're mysterious, or they're even fighting life or death, them or the mom.
Speaker: And so the doctor told my mom that I wasn't going to make it.
Speaker: And so I think about it.
Speaker: Oh, I've been a fighter my entire life.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I was, I had the thing on my nose.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I couldn't breathe.
Speaker: I was a month early.
Speaker: I was premature.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: So I was like, okay, this is starting to make sense.
Speaker: And that's why I always tell people to dive back into their DNA and the history of their beings, of their family.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Oh, generational trauma is big.
Speaker: Perspective on what you're here to do.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But not to cut you off, but that's, I didn't even know that.
Speaker: No, no.
Speaker: But I was just saying like how that came up.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Interesting.
Speaker: Weird.
Speaker: No, I just think you just, when you're, I feel like when you're in that frequency and you're in that vibe of your spirit, your spiritual realm, you don't even know what you're saying, but it's just like, you're not saying it.
Speaker: It's just coming through.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I just feel like that's just another entity that's watching over you, just coming out.
Speaker: Your higher self is what I say.
Speaker: Your third eye is open.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: No, it always has been.
Speaker: Actually, sometimes in like a scary way where I'm like, I don't like this.
Speaker: You know, when I was little, did you have things when you were little?
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: I had weird things.
Speaker: Spider senses.
Speaker: Yeah, no, I am.
Speaker: Yeah, it's always been a thing with me.
Speaker: And so when you were talking about past lives, I was thinking like, I do have.
Speaker: I don't know where I was in a past life or anything, but I have a very deep feeling like, oh, I've been here so many times.
Speaker: Yeah, I've been here.
Speaker: I think I met someone and he was like, yeah, this is like your spirit's been here 293,000 times.
Speaker: This is like your last go around.
Speaker: And in a past life, you was second to captain of a ship, but because you didn't speak your truth, you got killed.
Speaker: I was like...
Speaker: Oh, so I'm here.
Speaker: I got to speak the truth.
Speaker: I have to.
Speaker: I have no choice.
Speaker: It's like because I think in the past I thought I would get punished and I did for not speaking it.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So we had to rewrite contracts with my energy.
Speaker: It was so deep.
Speaker: But people who know, it's real.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because it's attached to your aura and your soul.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And you come here with a purpose.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: And I'll just share something that just came to me.
Speaker: um so my mom and she would be okay with me telling this before I was born had like a late term miscarriage so um she was very devastated and you know of course and years later I was I think I was
Speaker: 18 or something and I was talking to like a medium and he was like did your mom have like have a miscarriage did she lose a baby and I said oh yeah she did and he goes okay well I need you to know that the babies that
Speaker: you know, they don't make it, whatever.
Speaker: It's because their purpose was fulfilled.
Speaker: Your mom fulfilled her purpose.
Speaker: And so she could go back.
Speaker: So I think your sister was, yeah.
Speaker: And I had somebody on my podcast a few months ago, J.R.
Speaker: Martinez, and he was in like overseas and he was in like a bombing and
Speaker: And he believed his sister who passed away before he could actually meet her, saved him, came to him and pulled him out of his bombing.
Speaker: And so I believe in those things.
Speaker: We're protected.
Speaker: My cousin called them spiritual thugs, like spiritual angels.
Speaker: They come and protect and serve.
Speaker: And I pray a lot, though.
Speaker: I pray a lot.
Speaker: I pray a lot.
Speaker: Because that's been my anchor in my entire life.
Speaker: And no material thing, no fame, no fortune can change what that has changed.
Speaker: gave me when I didn't have much other than the spiritual side of things.
Speaker: And so, but everybody, like I said before, spiritual is different for everybody.
Speaker: That's why I was curious if you pray, if you meditate, or you do like, you know, retreats.
Speaker: I definitely do.
Speaker: I do all kinds of, all of that.
Speaker: Um, but I'm curious with your prayer, do you feel like it ever comes out of anxiety?
Speaker: Cause I feel like I can get into a pattern where if I,
Speaker: It's like something's happening and then I'm praying because I'm anxious.
Speaker: I'm like, oh my God, don't let this happen.
Speaker: You know what I mean?
Speaker: No, mine is more like, it's just like regimented.
Speaker: Like I pray every morning.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: Like, uh, like I always just praise, you know, for healing, for guidance.
Speaker: Uh, I always pray for miracles.
Speaker: Let a miracle happen before me, within me and around me after me.
Speaker: Just let it happen.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Allow me to connect with this person on this podcast at a higher capacity.
Speaker: And I just, you know, it's kind of like consistent depending on what I got going on.
Speaker: But it keeps me calm.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I do feel when I don't pray off, I forget.
Speaker: It's not that I feel off.
Speaker: I don't feel as on as I would like to be.
Speaker: You weren't as connected to yourself.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So it's part of like as soon as I get up, I meditate.
Speaker: I do my affirmations.
Speaker: I pray.
Speaker: I read certain scriptures.
Speaker: I go work out.
Speaker: Even if I'm driving in a car, I might just pray.
Speaker: God, thank you for this opportunity.
Speaker: Thank you for my car.
Speaker: Thank you for my health.
Speaker: Thank you for bringing beautiful people into my world.
Speaker: I pray for bringing the right people in my life at the right time, doing the right things.
Speaker: Because I feel like you've got to put intentions on what you want or what you think you want so you can serve a higher purpose.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because if you have the right people around you, and they can kind of push you to your purpose.
Speaker: And some people come in your life, you push them away, go back to abandonment, where I would have women come into my life to help me, and I'm pushing away.
Speaker: Like, why are you asking me that question?
Speaker: You don't even know that.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: But they're probably trying to serve me in a way where I need it, and I don't know, and they're just trying to figure out how.
Speaker: And I'm over, got my guard.
Speaker: I'm like, get away.
Speaker: What are you doing?
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: I'm like, oh, my God.
Speaker: This person's probably really trying to –
Speaker: give to me right now because I don't have a hard time receiving yes and that's part of your lesson too like on this weird journey whatever we're doing here yeah on this little art big rock yeah so what's next uh any new jewelry coming out what should we look I feel like you got books in you you got the podcast yeah yeah let's talk about the podcast my best friend and I
Speaker: We have a podcast, um, that we, am I doing it right?
Speaker: Am I doing it right?
Speaker: Girl, am I doing it right?
Speaker: You sure?
Speaker: Don't lie to me now.
Speaker: She actually, uh, she thought of the concept in, in a meditation.
Speaker: Ah, see.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Um, and then I came up with the name in a meditation, but anyways, uh, we, her and I are like very connected and, um,
Speaker: We always lean on each other for things and even little things like when we first graduated college and we were like, all right, so like –
Speaker: what is a 401k like i don't really know what that is but everybody thinks i do but i don't and like i feel dumb uh and so we would figure it out together or like investing we're like okay what is like you know the the market we don't even know yeah um and so we're like let's figure it out ourselves and then
Speaker: she realized like, oh, we should share it with other people.
Speaker: Because if we have these questions, other people have these questions and we'll figure it out for you.
Speaker: That is so powerful.
Speaker: I just thought about something that is like a divine title because that is the perfect question to ask yourself before you do something.
Speaker: If you just like really meditate and think about it and you ask your spirit, you know, am I doing it right?
Speaker: Your body will tell you.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: You know, they have, like, muscle testing they do with, like, placebo and, like, vitamin C patch.
Speaker: And, like, I forgot how they do it, but they ask you your age.
Speaker: If you lie, they can tell.
Speaker: But am I doing it right?
Speaker: It serves so many different avenues of life where it's, you know, going to a school, dating someone.
Speaker: It's kind of like that pendulum.
Speaker: You know, you're rocking it back and forth, and if it lands in the middle, you know it.
Speaker: wow, that's powerful.
Speaker: You have t-shirts?
Speaker: We've been talking about doing some merch, but, um, and it is like an all encompassing thing.
Speaker: It's not just, you know, business or finance or whatever.
Speaker: It's, um, we've had mental health experts on, we've had spiritual people on, we've had, um, all kinds of people from all walks of life and they all have a lesson to teach.
Speaker: Us and our audience.
Speaker: And so, yeah.
Speaker: So the podcast, Am I Doing This Right?
Speaker: And I also, I do have some new jewelry coming out pretty soon.
Speaker: It's been tough.
Speaker: It's been tough.
Speaker: Where do we find it?
Speaker: Is it online?
Speaker: What's your website?
Speaker: Yeah, yeah.
Speaker: If you go to natalie-mcmillan.com.
Speaker: Somebody has it without the dash and she hasn't even used it.
Speaker: Oh, come on.
Speaker: I know.
Speaker: Give it up.
Speaker: Let us have it.
Speaker: We need that.
Speaker: She's like a real estate agent.
Speaker: And I'm always like, where are you?
Speaker: But yeah, Natalie Dash McMillan.
Speaker: You can click and it'll take you to the shop.
Speaker: I love that.
Speaker: We got to get some jewelry for some guys.
Speaker: At least give me a sample of something.
Speaker: Okay, we can make you a sample.
Speaker: We can make you your own thing.
Speaker: I'll spend some money with you.
Speaker: Come on.
Speaker: We can make you your own thing.
Speaker: So if you had to give your younger self advice about life, what would it be when you're like, just think of yourself at 10, based on what you've been through and what you know now?
Speaker: Oh, God.
Speaker: I think I would tell myself that...
Speaker: Everything that I'm seeking now, I will find.
Speaker: Plush.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: Kush.
Speaker: Swish.
Speaker: Hold on.
Speaker: That was good.
Speaker: Everything I'm seeking that you said I eventually will find or will have.
Speaker: Everything that I've been seeking now, I will find.
Speaker: I'll have it.
Speaker: That's powerful.
Speaker: That's just that strong, just faith and just trust and experience gives you that.
Speaker: That's great.
Speaker: And then I have two final questions for business or life, uh, either, or what's working for you and what's a bit of a challenge.
Speaker: What's working and what's hurting.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I like that.
Speaker: Um, what's working for me is, uh, all of my relationships, my friendships.
Speaker: Um, I, um,
Speaker: take very i'm just so grateful i was like i don't even know how i ended up with this group of people but they're just like really remarkable people um and they uplift me in so many ways and so that's been a fairly consistent thing for me but it's definitely working and then what is quote unquote not working or challenging uh is i think
Speaker: I'm doing a lot of therapy recently.
Speaker: And I, the world right now is so, I mean, I just, I feel everything.
Speaker: So I'll get so upset, you know.
Speaker: And it's hard.
Speaker: You can't avoid the news.
Speaker: You can't like really avoid these things.
Speaker: You can't avoid energy.
Speaker: That's just out here with people and people coming from different backgrounds and experiences.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That affect your energy.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And it affects, you know, it makes me anxious.
Speaker: And then I'm so sad for people and I feel helpless and I'm just like, oh my God.
Speaker: And so I think learning to, and not learning to not shut it out, but
Speaker: process it in a different way where then I also don't feel guilty because then I also I'm like well if I don't feel this are they just going to be yeah left you know yeah um and so I think kind of balancing that because it's it's um it kind of is like a people pleasing thing yeah where it's like everyone else everyone else but it's at the expense of
Speaker: of me yeah you know and that's that's a great answer because it's true you know when you feel energy the way you do you do feel affected by everybody and you want to help everybody if you can yeah i was reading the book uh seat of the soul by gary zukoff i haven't heard of that it's so deep and it's so good and he was saying that you can't feel bad or sorry for someone that's on a deathbed or someone who homeless or
Speaker: Cause you don't know what they've been through in that past life.
Speaker: You don't know their experiences, what they're supposed to have in this lifetime.
Speaker: And then I remember my mom telling me like at 25, she was like, Eric, stop trying to intervene with God as opposed to intervene in people's life.
Speaker: You're not God.
Speaker: Like you're trying to help everybody.
Speaker: She's like, they have to learn just like you did.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So their lesson sometimes comes through pain and setbacks and hardships and adversity.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And I always would tell people, look, there's perspective and pain.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And sometimes we got to go through it to get over it.
Speaker: But it's tough.
Speaker: But you learn so much.
Speaker: Well, if you think about it, has there ever been, like if you think about your most painful moments in life, if you could go back, would you take them away?
Speaker: That's a great question.
Speaker: I don't think so.
Speaker: I wouldn't.
Speaker: I don't think I would either because they've made me who I am and I'm proud of who I am.
Speaker: Absolutely.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I wouldn't because you, everything I go through, I know is building my character of who I'm becoming.
Speaker: Cause I always say, it's not what we get out of life is what we become.
Speaker: So even me lacking and patient being, not having patience,
Speaker: I know there's something in that that I'm supposed to be learning why I need to be patient because not being patient, you push things further away instead of bringing them into your vortex and say, now you can have it.
Speaker: So we're all here learning a life lesson of what we're here to do.
Speaker: And I just want to share joy, love, and abundance and,
Speaker: I want to be authentic and show people like, yes, it's great, but it's also tough.
Speaker: Right.
Speaker: You know, like it's not easy.
Speaker: Like we don't show up every day like, hey, look at me.
Speaker: Like, yeah, don't wake up like that every day.
Speaker: No, it might appear the way.
Speaker: And that's why social media sometimes is a plus, but it also can be dangerous because people take what they see face value.
Speaker: Oh, I have to live a life.
Speaker: I'm a human just like you.
Speaker: I'm just more willing to go for it.
Speaker: I think that's the Sagittarius in me.
Speaker: Because like you said, I have to because I have to know.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: If I don't do it, then it's question marks.
Speaker: I need to know.
Speaker: If it fails, okay.
Speaker: But I have to know that I try.
Speaker: I got to do it.
Speaker: You got to try.
Speaker: So people try and follow Natalie.
Speaker: Not only is she a millionaire, she's a million.
Speaker: She's amazing.
Speaker: She's phenomenal.
Speaker: She's tapped in.
Speaker: She's authentic.
Speaker: And she doesn't like the rules.
Speaker: I don't like too many rules neither.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: once you understand yourself and know yourself, you can grow.
Speaker: And I think life is about exploring all parts of you.
Speaker: So is there anything you want to leave us with?
Speaker: Any motivation, any inspiration, anything, just whatever comes to mind.
Speaker: I think the world is deserving of your words.
Speaker: Oh, wow.
Speaker: No pressure.
Speaker: No pressure.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: This is, I don't know why this came to me just now, but
Speaker: And I say this all the time.
Speaker: So if somebody is listening to this that also listens to my podcast or knows me, they're like, here she goes again.
Speaker: But I think it's a good reminder, especially in the climate we're in right now, that people only say things out of love or out of fear.
Speaker: So, you know, all of this, if there's like hatred, what is hatred, right?
Speaker: It's fear.
Speaker: It's fear.
Speaker: It's fear of something.
Speaker: Racism.
Speaker: It's fear of something about this person.
Speaker: Negative comments, you know, comments on social media that are like, you know, it's not that they are actually hate you, you know, it's that they're afraid of something that you that you
Speaker: they see in you.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And so I think if you sort of put things in that perspective, you can see like where people are saying things out of love and where they're saying things out of fear.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And then you can almost kind of have compassion for that person.
Speaker: Because it's all love.
Speaker: And not to give them a pass.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because that's the other thing.
Speaker: It's like, we're not giving passes.
Speaker: Yeah, we're not giving passes.
Speaker: We on you.
Speaker: We're on you.
Speaker: But, you know, it's like,
Speaker: it's just trying to see like, all right, this is still a human.
Speaker: And I'm sad.
Speaker: I'm sad for them that they feel this way.
Speaker: Um, but, uh, it helps not take it so personal.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: And people do need to be held accountable.
Speaker: Cause I think people get off to like pissing someone off their own online or they say something.
Speaker: It's like, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: Cause you wouldn't say that in person.
Speaker: So I'm gonna let you know, I see what you're doing.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: We're going to have a conversation about it.
Speaker: Yes.
Speaker: So, you know, like,
Speaker: Well, no, no, no, no.
Speaker: It's okay.
Speaker: I forgive you.
Speaker: But please don't ever do that to me.
Speaker: I'm not that person.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: I don't know where you got that idea.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: But the older, the younger me would probably like, it's cool.
Speaker: Don't worry about it.
Speaker: Like, no, we need to put our foot down.
Speaker: And anybody out there who has struggles, who have challenges in creating boundaries.
Speaker: I'm telling you, create that boundary.
Speaker: Say no.
Speaker: Put your foot down.
Speaker: Let them see the shadow side of you because sometimes people need that from you if you're a people pleaser.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: Because people will run over you.
Speaker: They will take advantage of you and take you for granted.
Speaker: We don't want that.
Speaker: No.
Speaker: And they're mad at the perception of you.
Speaker: They're not at who you are.
Speaker: They're mad at their perception of you and you changing it on them.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: So, well, this has been a phenomenal episode.
Speaker: This episode is sponsored by Miracle Season Coaching.
Speaker: Oh.
Speaker: Yeah, 101 Coaching.
Speaker: To anybody out there looking to scale their human self, their emotional intelligence, and just evolve and become their best self, go to the Eat Bigger Speaks.
Speaker: Click the link in the bio and sign up for 101 Coaching.
Speaker: And don't forget.
Speaker: To get the It's Miracle Season app.
Speaker: Download it.
Speaker: Join me and transform your life.
Speaker: Oh, yeah.
Speaker: We got the merch on the app, too.
Speaker: Everything's on there.
Speaker: You know?
Speaker: We get all that.
Speaker: And a bag of chips.
Speaker: They should say that a lot.
Speaker: And don't forget to follow Natalie.
Speaker: She's lovely.
Speaker: I feel like we're going to be friends.
Speaker: I want to talk to you more off the podcast and how I can add value and help you.
Speaker: And I feel like as a man in this space, I feel like men and women need to collab more.
Speaker: Because I value a woman's perspective because it's not mine.
Speaker: And I can't think like that.
Speaker: So I want to know your thoughts and your opinions.
Speaker: Oh, and we're here to help each other.
Speaker: Yes, yeah.
Speaker: Not to take or hurt each other.
Speaker: So, men, we got to step up.
Speaker: We got to become more vulnerable, more authentic, more spiritual.
Speaker: And the women need us.
Speaker: So I'm here.
Speaker: So I'm here for you and whatever that looks like.
Speaker: And we're here to share and give and grow together.
Speaker: Yeah.
Speaker: That's all.
Speaker: That's it.
Speaker: Guys, have a good one.
Speaker: Listen to this.
Speaker: Share this on your social.
Speaker: Subscribe.
Speaker: And I got another episode of Bigger Talks.
Speaker: And we're out.
Speaker: Peace.
Speaker: Wow.
Speaker: You did it.
Speaker: That was fun.
Speaker: That was fun.
Speaker: And we still on.
Speaker: Are we still on?
Speaker: Geez.
