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Colorado, Conspiracies and Digi Problems! Best of Digimon: The Movie (Commentary Track)
109 Plays9 months ago
Happy Easter Pandalorians hope you have a wonderful day! Join Satsunami and friend of the channel Craigy C as we take on the classic Digimon film of 2000. Does it hold up today? Or what were they thinking?! Let's digivolve and find out!
This podcast is a member of the PodPack Collective. The members are as follows:
Chatsunami
Casting Views
Nerdstalgic
2 Girls 1 Reusable Cup
Review it Yourself
Seismic Cinema
For further information, please follow the link: https://www.chatsunami.com/p/podpack-collective/
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Battle Toaster
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Transcript
Introduction and Movie Setup
00:00:05
Speaker
Welcome to Chatsunami. Hello everybody and welcome to another watcha long. My name's Chatsunami and I'm joined by... The devolving from... I thought I was going to have a joke lined up with him, but I don't have one, it's me, it's me, it's me.
00:00:34
Speaker
And it's my digi-destiny to sit, what was this with you? Instead of going home and seeing my wife. I feel sad now.
Nostalgia and Humor: Digimon vs Pokémon
00:00:46
Speaker
I have seen this film maybe three times I think, and I cannot remember a thing. And this is of course Wallace from America. Do you not remember Wallace from America? Wallace from America? It's like, what are the digi-destines? Prodigis and all that shit.
00:01:03
Speaker
If you keep to watch Digimon, I'm sorry. You're stuck with us. Did you like Digimon? You just killed that egg. What the hell? But then why is it okay to eat an egg in front of an egg? I'd put an egg in front of an egg. It's a sigma move. Show the eggs who's who. Tell the other eggs what you saw. Did you like Digimon, girl?
00:01:29
Speaker
I was quite childish in the sense that I enjoyed it relatively. But then of course, because kids being kids, they were all like, ooh, Pokémon Digimon! Choose one, you know. I don't know why I went to school with the Green Goblin, but,
Digimon's Chocolate Dilemma: A Wild Critique
00:01:44
Speaker
you know. Feeding chocolate, so the first thing you do is you find a wild animal. I know they're kids, they're babies, but you find a wild animal and you start stuffing chocolate down its throat. What if this was like a dog Digimon? You've killed that Digimon right off the bat!
00:01:58
Speaker
Did you dare? That's like my dog. I know it's a cat, but it's like my dog. Your dog doesn't like that. Yeah, she's very cat-like, surprisingly, for her dog. Territorial of food. I can get places I never realised. Digivolves. Digivolves, yeah, that's a bit of a problem. Can't remember the name.
00:02:24
Speaker
Can you imagine if the way they learned languages was by some kind of Google Translate programme? So it's like they've really spoke broken whatever language. A double. I assumed you were going to be like, when it goes to speech it just reads your tweets. Oh boy! You're digi-problematic! Digi-cancelled!
00:02:52
Speaker
Do you think they've put a generation of children all having to join in?
Absurd Digimon Scenarios
00:02:56
Speaker
Also can you imagine if he's like, okay wife, I'll be home in two minutes. Dead. What the hell? Oh man, imagine living in those houses with a fireball through the window. I just played my ball good. Oh my god, the moon gave birth. I also liked that he shot some fireballs and it hit a bone. That's okay, they were all Pokémon fans.
00:03:18
Speaker
You know how, like, they say this later but the fact that only the kids can say this so obviously all the adults won't believe them and everything. She's really Pokemon's a conspiracy theory. I shouldn't have asked.
00:03:32
Speaker
When there's a guy out there saying, I saw a real live Pokemon, and they're like, that's nice, just go back in the house, just go back in the house. And he's like, no, I saw it, and he's like, if did you buy the real one, I kept Pokemon. And he's like, that's nice, get in the house, get in the house. Buy your toys, buy your toys right now, now. Change. And get your mother's credit card too. Buy. Get a paper on consumer.
00:03:57
Speaker
But I assume when people drive to work tomorrow morning they're going to be like, why is this bridge no longer here? Bloody prefecture council. They don't fill the potholes. Look at the sign on that pothole.
Council Tax and Chaos: Public Infrastructure Jokes
00:04:12
Speaker
Welcome to our Digimon Watch. We complain about the council. This is what people tune into here. Exactly. You're talking about council tax. Jesus. It's like people literally on Digi fire. Digi dying.
00:04:30
Speaker
Ooh, that's saucy. No, I've put her away. Yeah, that was way too digital. What the fuck? Me when? Me when on train in Japan. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to work every day. Me missing my train to
00:05:01
Speaker
Cozy lips. Cozy lips? Did she just shit in the glass? She's going with the glass. Oh my god, darn it. Oh no! I haven't crushed him so yet. Don't forget, all of us, you can buy in your local toy store. I mean, they even have a fucking roll call. Look at that. That's a massive fridge. Look at the size of that trunker.
00:05:28
Speaker
Is this even their grandmother's house? This is some random woman. Yeah. It's like you're that horror film spoiler. It's like a horror film when they go to sleep with a gran or some of these kids. And then it's like the twist is, let's not your grandmother! Get over there! Is that Pocky in the bottom? I think it looks like Pocky, yeah. Who saws children in half?
00:05:56
Speaker
Because usually it's like an adult, you know, it's an adult vlogger. What sick birthday clowns it is? Okay, I need a child to sort. It's like the whole point of having a magician's assistant is that someone you can trust, you kids don't wriggle too much. Stay very, very still. Can you pass me some pocky?
00:06:25
Speaker
Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum
00:06:39
Speaker
It's called Penguin, like the penguin from Hot Penguin. Is that a digital feature? Yes, that's a digital feature. Once again, that average fan mail from Satsanami. Used to be when I was a kid, you know, people were like, oh, can't believe you talked to an internet kid before, man. It was like, can't believe you talked to an internet kid before, man. It could be a Digimon.
Digimon and Household Appliances Takeover
00:07:01
Speaker
Moshy, mushy.
00:07:04
Speaker
What's your mother's maiden name, man? That's too interesting. Oh my god, he's taking over the microwave. You bastard! You leave my kinks out of there, you son of a bitch! See if my microwave ever got taken over at the time when I'd be trying to put myself straight and then I'm throwing hands. I'd be back in that gun. We're all set. Well, obviously he's climbing it to make a decision. Send me in! Is he beating these camera?
00:07:34
Speaker
Okay grandmother, go into the water. He went to the julie. And this is what Inframad was doing. He was drunk dialing everyone. I miss you Sandraman. Call me back. They turned the rookies against us. At the eye. Just on the floor. At the eye. I'm gonna hang up. He's shined. Did I say button beer?
00:08:03
Speaker
I hope so. See if this would mean, nowadays, the amount of conspiracy theorists that would be like, it was the government. They put on a Digimon, okay? They turned on a Digimon, okay? They wanted to bring down the infrastructure. But why a Digimon? Why didn't they just turn off the plug? It was a Digimon, I swear! That's what I fear when I'll be like if I don't feed her. I've always seen a bottle that machine gun, then.
00:08:33
Speaker
What my dog does in our spare time is on the other side. Mary Kiss was a body dog on body armor cannon suit. Why? I think the real question is why dog? Remember early after he drank. Oh, I don't poo jizz. Izzy, you wouldn't believe it. The virus infected your computer.
00:08:56
Speaker
I was cold I feel sick of it! I wonder if I'd like they're talking and there's a fucking mess I already know! We won't be there. Where is Willis though? My boy! Where is Willis? We demand more ruis! Every character should be asking right now.
Wallace: The Mysterious Digimon Plot Thread
00:09:12
Speaker
Who's Wallace? Why is Wallace? Which is Wallace? I think you give Wallace a time machine so you can come back to every part of this. Oh and Doctor Who? Or Doctor Wallace? You take that back you son of a bitch! That is a massive rug. Can I just say, can you email me? What did you want? What did you want me, my friend? Can you get me straight in order? On a Colorado? This is not prodigious!
00:09:43
Speaker
What was left in Colorado? Oh my god! You're actually looking up! Oh my god! That is a cool flag! A different flag! What is in Colorado? It's worth bopping! He's like, don't get my door open!
00:10:09
Speaker
You're going to have to put me on the list! That was the 10 best things to do in Colorado. Guys, you have to see Colorado because of the Rocky Mountains. The Colorado River. Oh yeah, that's why he's born. That's his legalisation. What, so he's at together? That might place us.
00:10:29
Speaker
I just don't know. Can I just look just at random kids just at the top, right? Hey guys! Hey it's me, what was that? Every Zoom call in the year 2000. Put it off the plug! POV, my femur, I say there's not many anime worth watching. I was going to say POV, you're a feed when you say coordination. Straight to bed!
00:10:56
Speaker
Come at me, I know it is! Wallace, my boy! Wallace was right! Wallace was right! Hashtag Wallace was right! Hashtag Digimon out for Wallace! Hashtag save Colorado! Takes a sword out, who goes what? Oh come on! What?! Let's go! Fuck him up, Wallace! Fuck him up!
00:11:24
Speaker
What's wrong with it? You're taking a selfie with a fucking rat? What is wrong with you? She's like, oh, right, he got OP, Willis. Yes! I have to talk about whatever plot point you were talking about. My boy! Oh my God. Acto destroyed. Back to color. I will never go back there. I'm not making a comment on color. I don't care. This is about 31, but. I love how you didn't even single
Government Conspiracies and Digimon Distractions
00:11:51
Speaker
out America. You just said color.
00:11:54
Speaker
I have no idea what we've got on this boat. Oh, is that the top 10 last time? Thanks to watch out for Digimon guns! And Digimon guns! It's like me and a fighter but I'll get my winem right. Widerclaw! Are you a magician? Did you just hit the Digimon? I just think it's a clean void. Holy shit! Don't suppose you could try to turn lights on lemonade? I'm gonna get a gala class onion just if you like.
00:12:21
Speaker
You might shit yourself, but you know what? I'm willing to take that chance! I'm willing to risk you atrociousness! Some of us may shit ourselves! But that's the risk I'm willing to take! You just quite! Take me through death! Kids don't do this! Yeah, don't even with Digimon! This whole truck could be a Digimon!
00:12:49
Speaker
If Judah's desired vengeance is taught me anything, that's going to be a stand. This truck is an enemy stand, Judah.
00:13:00
Speaker
Did you hear that? Blundie! Get away from that, Blundie! What is he doing? Is he bench pressing? I'm more interested in the rabbit like bench pressing. I don't want to make a commentary, right? And I do think this design's cool. But this is the first ditchy mum we've seen in America. And right off the bat, they gave him two guns.
00:13:21
Speaker
Oh yeah, nevermind. They've been doing their chores and they're rusty barns. I do like that you got two magical pets and the first thing you did was you put them to wax. America! You crocodiles here. You're not as good as they are. He's still you in his clothes. Bacon-o-be-give. I am suffering from liquid.
00:13:54
Speaker
Of course, Digi-Ligmon! Digi-Ligmon! He has a lot of issues. Digi-Ligmon! I will trip him up. I hope he doesn't know. Oh no, he knows! Quick, Davis, use the Digi-Gon! It's just a wreck.
00:14:22
Speaker
How does this work? I don't know Craig, it's anatomy. The golden digi-glock. The man with the golden glock. Oh no, I'm dead. Big bag of tuck. I don't know.
00:14:49
Speaker
Shouldn't tell something to you, Smellup though! Destroy him! He's being evicted by the line! I think he's saying blow him up from the inside! I've got to get in there! Remember your past! And those Tom Horwood mods! I don't feel so good both! See if this was like a dark grey, I should have been like, Fred's always staying together! And then there's like that gunshot from behind! Gunshot for you to block!
00:15:19
Speaker
Yeah. Basically, if you die you're not someone's friend. Like they weren't your friend anyway. Mediocre. Key L.M. He sponsored this one. What was that random? Key L.M. Is that not the Dutch? Yeah. Like they are my wife. What the fuck are Key L.M. and the Digimon film? That's like British Airways being in the Pokemon film. So I noticed that's the influence trick.
00:15:48
Speaker
It was three days track until you saw this. It does between you saw! So yeah, that was a ditch of my trouble. Was it everything you hoped for and more? I have seen this film. This is the third or the fourth time I've watched this, right? And it's once again completely overwhelmed and confused me. That was... I'm going to wait for it to move.
00:16:15
Speaker
Can I go with you? I'm waiting for the post-credits. Nick, Nick Fury walks out and he's like, well, we need you. We need you for the Digibarn edition of...
Engagement Plea on Chatsunami
00:16:25
Speaker
I was going to say Steve, Digi Steve, say Digi also. Leave a Digi comment on Chatsunami's Digi website. Tell us how much you Digi love this Digi film. Please do, because don't let our Digi suffering be in vain. Digi Vane. Digi Vane, thank you. Digi Vane. Digibarn.