Transcript
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Speaker: Lightest, I'm bored. What plaything can you offer me today?
Speaker: got War Rocket Ajax to bring back his body. Terminate, exit, go, go!
Speaker: Hello, everybody, and welcome to War Rocket Ajax. This is the Internet's most explosive comic book and pop culture podcast, and we are your hosts. My name is Chris Sims. With me, as always, is Matt Wilson. Matt, I do not have a question for you this time.
Speaker: Okay. Instead, i think we need to have a discussion. ah Oh, no. Oh, no. Now, a listener whose identity will be revealed in time...
Speaker: gave me the money to buy K-Bartana. Which you did. The $30. I've seen photos of you holding it. Yes. yeah It sucks and is super dumb. I am so glad I have it.
Speaker: It truly brings me joy that I have this awful sword. Now, I also said if i received double the price, I would buy one for you against your will.
Speaker: Correct. someone sent me Someone sent me a very generous amount of money and said specifically they did not want to. This was for anything but the Cave Artana for Matt Wilson.
Speaker: So Soso Sundere is in your corner. Someone else sent me $60, the price of two Cave Artanas, and said that it was explicitly not for a Cave Artana for Matt Wilson.
Speaker: It was explicitly for two K-Martanas for Matt Wilson. Now, Matt, you have to agree that this is the funniest thing that we have done on this entire show in its 17-year run.
Speaker: I agree that it's funny. I agree that it's funny. But I do have to say this. If you buy me two K-Martanas, first of all, $60 isn't going to cover it because there's going to be a shipping cost.
Speaker: i mean I mean, I'm comfortable footing the bill for the shipping.
Speaker: Second, that sword, those two swords are going to, like, they're not going to be brought inside of my house. they I know that they won't be allowed for me to bring them inside of my house.
Speaker: And I don't really want them. So, here's here's here's the thing. Here's the thing about it. I think...
Speaker: That instead of buying swords, that are going to go to a company that, like... These are people that put their swords in, like, military cover American flag motif boxes. Uh-huh.
Speaker: Yes, the box does say, U.S. Combat Sword. Yeah. Instead of... I mean, Matt, would you... Do you think that the box should be less dumb than the sword?
Speaker: No, but I'm saying um they are attempting to profit. like I'm making no illusions about these swords being made in the United States, but ah this is a company that is attempting to profit off of a certain clientele.
Speaker: ah Perhaps instead of providing money to such a company, ah we could just give that $60 to the Trevor Project.
Speaker: I have said before, as your comedy partner, I feel like I have to gi send you to K. Bartanas. because i Because I, I'm sorry, don't believe you.
Speaker: i think i do I do not believe you that they would not come into your house, because what are you going do leave them on the porch? I think they will be put in a car. And, like If it were any other thing... And then in case like the shit pops off, like you' you've got them in the car.
Speaker: No, they're not taken out of the boxes. They're not going to be taken out of the boxes. the i I think... because like I already have a sword. I have a sword. It's in my office. It's here. yes it's And it's already a katana.
Speaker: Yes. If it were any other item, I would just donate them. You can't donate these. I don't see why you can't.
Speaker: Who would take it? don't know. Swords for Tots? yeah
Speaker: What I'm saying is, instead of throw it essentially throwing $60 down the toilet, donate it to a charity that can actually make use of it.
Speaker: I'm sure you know... At least one person that it would be hilarious to give the sword. But anyway, as I was saying, as i was saying as your as your comedy partner of well over a decade, I do feel compelled to do this.
Speaker: As your friend who knows you, and as your friend who still thinks it's very funny when you're hassled, yeah as you know, the last thing I want is you to be mad at me.
Speaker: ah
Speaker: So I did, in fact, check with ah with the the person who donated the $60 explicitly for two Cabo Artanos for Matt Wilson. And I offered to return it because I said, I cannot in good conscience get this. And i like Matt really doesn't want these.
Speaker: Because, Matt, you have been adamant. Yeah, I really don't want it. say Say what you will about War Rocket Ajax. the The boys don't hide their feelings.
Speaker: No, i it's really a matter of if these things appear in my driveway or like on my front step, and...
Speaker: then they're here. I'm just going to spiral into thinking of all the ways that this money could have been used for any other purpose.
Speaker: And that's so funny, Matt.
Speaker: But I said, hey, I can't, I can good con, just keep this. So ah the the person who sent the 60 bucks very nicely responded,
Speaker: You don't have to buy Matt Wilson the Kebartanas. You can spend this on something in honor of Matt Wilson. So Matt, if you think a donation to the Trevor Project is is the move, I fully support that.
Speaker: Let's do that. Let's do that. Thank you. Thank you. Now, i if the Trevor Project needs swords... that then Then give them swords by all means. Honestly, at this point, hell yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. i i I couldn't think of a group where I'm more encouraged to provide them with swords.
Speaker: Really but ecstatic to do that. um I just don't need them. isn't Look, if I think if if anybody should have a K-Bartana, it's them. but You know, Matt, you say you don't need them, but you know what? i don't think you i don't think you know you don't need them.
Speaker: You think you don't need them. Well, if I'm caught in a situation where ah I absolutely have to have them. you're Where you're like, i wish I sure wish I had two relatively dulls.
Speaker: yeah so Surprisingly sturdy for the money. K-Bar fighting knife-shaped katanas. i'll I'll sure say, well, I was wrong. i i will admit that I was wrong in that situation. Okay, good. good yeah Hey, we've got a great show for everybody this week. It's time for Hickmania.
Speaker: I believe this is Hickmania 5. Yeah. Hickmania 5. Yeah. so which This would be the second one in the ah in the Atlantic City... ah Matt, this is very fitting. Wrestlemania 5, the Mega Powers explode.
Speaker: The Mega Powers explode, and this...
Speaker: Well, but one one member of the Fantastic Four dies. Who could it be in this story called Three?
Speaker: Who's going to die forever? Yes, but this this was WrestleMania V was the second WrestleMania in a row at the Atlantic City Convention Hall, which they kept calling Trump Plaza, eight even though it wasn't.
Speaker: garbage venue for pro wrestling. bad Bad venue for pro wrestling, not even the building they said it was. Yeah.
Speaker: ah But yes, that is the WrestleMania where the Mega Powers exploded. We'll find out which of the three members, which of the four members of the Fantastic Four has has to go down on this episode when we get to Hickmania. But before that, Chris, we do have some business to take care of here at the top of the show, starting with thanking our newest supporters over on Patreon.
Speaker: That's right, Matt. Now, these the people who want to support the show. They want to help us out. They want us to keep doing all the fun things that we do, like buying Matt Wilson swords.
Speaker: Swords that ah hopefully he will like, because Matt, I know there are swords out there that you would accept. There are swords that I would accept, ah but that just ain't that just ain't it. It ain't that ain it this one, which everyone involved in this story has acknowledged is terrible.
Speaker: Yeah, i I universally agree that this sort of sucks shit.
Speaker: Just the disgust in your voice for the past week is so funny. I'm sorry as your Matt, you're my best friend. Uh-huh, yeah. It's so funny.
Speaker: But yes, these the people who want to keep the show going. Help us have the fun that we have ah each and every week here on the show. They want to go down to 763 Gimmick Street. How do you do that? How do you help us out?
Speaker: Well, you don't need no kettlebells. You don't need no vitamins. ah you need You do need vitamins. You should take vitamins. well did Talk to your medical. This is not medical advice. Talk to your provider.
Speaker: As one half of the Mega Powers famously said, take your vitamins. take Take vitamins that you need if you need them. Yeah.
Speaker: Okay. I completely biffed it because I realized I was giving out medical advice. All you gotta do is go to patreon.com slash warrocketajax, kick in as little as a dollar a month to help keep the show going. Help keep my dogs in squeaky toys.
Speaker: Yeah, you've been here this week. Help us pay those gimmicks they keep sending in the mail called bills. And if you are at the $15 level, you can join the Gimmick Street Preservation Society, just like Jennifer Raines did.
Speaker: oh okay, so we do have one. Yes, noted so sword owner Jennifer Raines. Yes, who who I probably wouldn't be so ungrateful.
Speaker: She would not want that fucking sword. You don't know that. You don't know that. i I know. I shouldn't speak for Jen. Okay. Now, i do I do have something that needs to go on Gimmick Street at our at our earliest opportunity, which is when it shall be revealed.
Speaker: Okay. So, for 764 Gimmick Street... We'll reveal your location on Gimmick Street, but Jen is providing this week's location on Gimmick Street at 763 Gimmick Street.
Speaker: It is Uncle Jobby's Summer Kids Wrestling Camp and Tax Shelter. Uncle Jobby's is very good. Uncle Jobby's is very good. ah Jen, thank you for sending in that location on Gimmick Street and becoming a member of the Gimmick Street Preservation Society. Like I said, if you're at the $15 level, you can join the Gimmick Street Preservation Society and be part of that group Of people who name a location on Gimmick Street, which is very, very cool.
Speaker: Chris, would you like to hear our newest Patreon supporters? Matt, of course I would. I would love to hear them so that I can thank them for their generosity, especially in this time in which I do not have a job.
Speaker: I don't know if I read Patrick Geertner's name last week or not. so I believe you did. I did. Okay. So we there's only one new member of the Patreon, and that Shadavid.
Speaker: Thank you, Shadevid. If you would like to be like Shadevid and help us out here on the show, you can do it by going to patreon.com slash warrocketajax, and as Chris said, kicking in as little as a dollar a month to support all the shows we do.
Speaker: As a patron at any level, that includes even one dollar per month. you get ad-free episodes of all the shows that we do.
Speaker: get on your own little special feed on Patreon ah a ah every episode of every show that we do with no ads, like I said, in your own feed. At the $5 level...
Speaker: You can get bonus content. That's stuff that I cut out of the show and put specially on Patreon. That's stuff that ah we record specially for Patreon. That is writing that Chris and I have done for Patreon.
Speaker: All of that is available on Patreon at the $5 level. And if you join at the $5 level, you instantly get access to all of the bonus content that we have done over the years, which is quite a bit by this point.
Speaker: The $10 level, you get line-stepping privileges for our segments, which currently include One to Ten of Swords and Every Story Ever. $15 level, Gimmick Street Preservation Society, name a and address on Gimmick Street. $20 level, T-shirt.
Speaker: I'm going to send some messages about the 2026 T-shirt this week. And we will really get the ball rolling on that very soon. If you're unable to help us monetarily, which we understand that that may be true, and there's lots of reasons why that might be.
Speaker: You can help us out in other ways. You can leave us a five-star review on the podcasting app that you use, whatever that may be. Or you can just tell your friends and family about the show, spread the word about the show, let people know to listen to this podcast, War Rocket Ajax, and ah then maybe your friends and family, people you know, will listen to the show, like it, and then they will back our Patreon.
Speaker: We would love for that to happen.
Speaker: With that, Chris, it's time for some checks and recs, what do you say? Let's do it.
Speaker: Chris, what do you have to check in with this week? As you can no doubt hear, much to your annoyance, in the background of this very recording, folks, I got dogs. That's right, dogs-uh.
Speaker: Two of them. we've We've gotten Coffee Cup a little sister. She's terrible.
Speaker: Her name is Trouble Fries. And she is... She's a puppy puppy, Matt. Now, I haven't had a puppy puppy since I was like a teenager.
Speaker: But she is as weeks old. eleven weeks old okay So she's a ah baby dog. So she's squeaking. She's squeaking over there. She's squeaking. she She and Coffee Cup are currently fighting over the noisiest toy they own. i have tried to give them others.
Speaker: But you know what? this is This, as a wise man, once said, it's a life podcast. It's a personal journal. Right, yeah. yeah I will say, Coffee Cup has taken very ah well to being a ah big brother, and also to setting boundaries.
Speaker: Coffee Cup, i I did think he had run away the other day, but he had just gone upstairs where his little sister cannot reach him so that he could sleep, which I was like, must be nice.
Speaker: And I gotta say, the looks this dog has been giving me, you would not know that like a month ago he ate my Steam Deck. Because this dog's like, can you believe this? Can you believe how annoying this one is with all the chewing on stuff and biting and tearing things up?
Speaker: now Now he has to be the responsible one. Yeah. Yeah. classic Classic middle child. Classic middle child. So yes, i um if you if you hear more dog than usual in the coming weeks, I do apologize.
Speaker: But also I kind of don't because but you you not like dogs? you don't you don't You don't like being happy? Come on. Be for real.
Speaker: I know it's a little bit annoying, but but give me give folks, give me some grace. that's That's the theme of 2026. Give us some grace. Give us some grace. We're we're we're some grace-needing dudes. Give us some grace, and if we're going to buy Matt another sword, it's got to be a good one. It's got to be a good one.
Speaker: Matt, what have you been up to for the past a week or so? Well, Chris, I have done a few things. First of all, I want to let people know if they are in the Asheville, North Carolina area, that in around one month's time, specifically from May 6th through the 9th,
Speaker: ah there will be the Asheville Improv Festival here in town. um I am going to be performing at that in one show on Thursday, May 7th in the block at 5 p.m.
Speaker: ah with my ah troop, one of my troops, um which we've kind of changed our names, so I don't... i don't We were mostly millennials. I think we're going to be second pancake. i'm I'm not sure. But I'll be performing with that troupe in the five o'clock block on Thursday May seventh ah So ah anybody who has an interest and lives in the region should come see that show.
Speaker: ah Marlene will be performing in a whole bunch of shows too. um She will also be in that Thursday at 5 block, but also in a block on Thursday at 9 p.m. And I think in a show on the Friday the 8th as well.
Speaker: And also, um I'm going to be doing like tech and sound for almost every show in the festival. So I will be heavily involved in this year's Asheville Improv Festival. And um we've got some great ah teams and and improvisers coming from all over the country for it. So ah again, if you're, if you can get here, if you're around and you want,
Speaker: can make it to the Asheville Improv Festival, you should come. Besides that, i don't know. i I'm feeling better after being sick last week, thankfully.
Speaker: And I'm still trying to do some home repairs. um If anybody knows of a really good and really ah stable closet shelving system, please say so and tell me.
Speaker: Oh, one other thing. um Without even realizing it, I took the Jeopardy ah anytime test again two nights ago. Because it i think it was Tuesday um was Jeopardy.
Speaker: And on the show, they were really promoting that it was Jeopardy. And they were like, You can go take our Jeopardy quiz right now for ah to like be entered into a drawing. And so I did, and it was just the anytime test.
Speaker: So we'll see if I hear from Jeopardy soon. ah Jeopardy, you've got to get at me one of these days. isn't I've auditioned twice. They've got to let me on the show one of these days. Teenie Howard's going to be on it.
Speaker: And butre we're all we're all rooting for Teenie. We all love Teenie. We're all rooting for Teenie. But, like, let me on the show sometime. Let Matt on the show. But do not let Benito on that show.
Speaker: i Don't do it. I'm just kidding. Let Benito on the show, too. Let everybody on the show. why do Why does somebody need to come back every day?
Speaker: don't need to come back every day. ah They've been bringing a lot of people back more than every day. There's like a ah long stretch of Jeopardy shows now at the end of the year where it's just like people who have been on the show before.
Speaker: mean, that's kind of fun. It's fun, but like kind of unfair. There's so many of us out out there who are hungry to be on Jeopardy. It's true. You do have the Jepper hunger.
Speaker: Yes. I hated saying that. Oh, and well, I have a rec that's Jeopardy related in a minute as well. um But ah now it's time for recs. Chris, what do you have to recommend?
Speaker: Matt! Now dig this. You know that I like oh the the offerings of Dropout.tv.
Speaker: Yes, I sure do. And you know that I also like, well, I don't like being lied to. And I don't like meanness. And i don't like just, you know, pranks. I t hate pranks.
Speaker: as As you know, Matt. Noted prank hater, Chris Sims. And I will say this, buying you that sword, that's not a prank. That's just funny. It is sort of a prank. It's not a prank, Matt. It's not a prank.
Speaker: But it's it's a prank that you tell me you that you were going to tell me you did. like it's It's not a prank in that it's a surprise. It's more a threat than a prank.
Speaker: But ah but i don't I don't like it. Don't like it one bit. Now, that said, what I love is a good April Fool's joke, which is basically just doing something you don't normally do that's silly Yeah. You know?
Speaker: Yeah. and Dropout did a great one this year, which is that they put out Dimension 20 on a bus season season two. Oh, that's funny that's good. That's funny.
Speaker: Yeah. it's ah It's an hour long. It's a full hour.
Speaker: It is a sequel to the the joke on on Game Changer of Katie Maravich running a season of Dimension 20. Katie Maravich, in the running for the most underrated ah Dropout performer.
Speaker: Hasn't been around so much lately. Yeah. Katie Maravich, one of the all-timers. I will say this. If you want to see the kind of scripted comedy that ah Dropout can do, watch Kingpin Katie. It's very funny. It's all about Katie Maravich doing cocaine.
Speaker: It is... Very, very funny, Matt. Because it is It is now Much like the sword incident of 2026, as we shall now be calling it.
Speaker: um The Kei Bartana incident. Because, the look, let's be honest. You and me, we're probably going to have another sword incident.
Speaker: That's true. We've got to categorize them and date them. The U.S. combat sword. ah incident. It is pointed and personal this time.
Speaker: It's not just Katie Marovitch showing up not knowing how to play D&D or seemingly what D&D actually is. It's not that anymore.
Speaker: This time it's personal and it's extremely funny. It is in many ways, I feel like, as much of an apotheosis of Dropout as the Sam-a-Lama-Ding-Dong episode of Game Changer.
Speaker: In that it requires so much other dropout stuff to exist for this to be a punchline. Like, two things that aren't really jokes that just exist.
Speaker: But ah highly, highly enjoyable, highly recommended. ah Well worth an hour of your time if you have not yet watched it. And it's it's very funny...
Speaker: Again, much like much like when dealing with Matt Wilson, it's very funny to see Brennan Lee Mulligan play the straight man who gets lost in being the straight man and then becomes but like comes back after. Because there is a bit there is a prop that is the hardest I've laughed at dropout in a minute, but ah well worth checking out. Matt, what do you have to recommend?
Speaker: I have two dropout-related things to recommend. The first, as I said, was a Jeopardy-related thing. It is a one-off episode of Jeopardy on YouTube that is called Jeopardy YouTube Edition.
Speaker: It's a little strange because the three contestants are referred to as YouTubers, which you I do not think of Brennan Lee Mulligan as being, but...
Speaker: he He is one of the three contestants and is referred to as a YouTuber. I mean, like um they they post a lot of that stuff on, like, you know, like the like the the Oreo CEO hit big on YouTube. yeah and And, I mean, all of ah Fantasy High Season 1 is up there. So, sure. Why Yeah, so they do talk a lot about um um Dimension 20 as, like, a thing that he does. But the other two contestants are Rebecca Black, the singer of Friday.
Speaker: And Monet X Change, who hosts the YouTube show and is also from RuPaul's Drag Race and The Traitors and all of that. um But it is one round of Jeopardy. It is only the first round of Jeopardy. so it's The show is like the show is like almost the length of a regular episode of Jeopardy, but it's only just the one round and final Jeopardy.
Speaker: And the categories are largely YouTube-related, either about like classic YouTube videos or like music videos that have tons of views or that sort of thing.
Speaker: I just want to note, there is ah absolutely a Brennan Lee Mulligan game-changer moment of intense competitiveness on that show. Okay.
Speaker: That is like all-time classic good. I do not want to give away what it is. You should just watch it. But it is it is delightful. And Rebecca Black... Rebecca Black...
Speaker: has really like come into herself and like black owns dude. Yeah. Yeah. Like she knows who she is. She's like good humored about who she is and what she's done. and like, she's great. She's great on that episode of, uh, you jeopardy YouTube edition. And then Monet exchange is a, an absolute delight.
Speaker: Um, And Ken Jennings is having fun, too. So um i that's worth a watch. The other thing I want to recommend is a show that's on Dropout but doesn't have any Dropout people on it because it's the first show that Dropout has ever licensed.
Speaker: he It is a British puppet show called Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared. Yes, I am unsurprised that this is your recommendation.
Speaker: Have you watched it yes It is so up my alley. like It's very much kind of like in the vein of an Adult Swim show. it it has strong look-around-you vibes. It has look-around-you vibes, for sure.
Speaker: It's very much in the vein, but it's also very much in the vein of an Adult Swim show, but particularly the Adult Swim infomercials, if you remember those. I do. it very much feels like the Adult Swim infomercials. So there was a web series, and then there was a series on, I think it was on Channel 4 in the UK.
Speaker: it's It's kind of hard to describe, but like it's definitely... The presentation of like a kid's show, like a kid's show with puppets, but it is all often very violent, and it is all about kind of like existential crises. So the first episode from the Channel 4 show that's on Dropout is called Jobs.
Speaker: In the episode, the three main characters, who are Red Guy, Yellow Guy, and Duck, can't figure out what to do with their day. They talk about having to have a job. A talking briefcase shows up and starts singing at them about the kinds of jobs that they could have. But the song stops in the middle when there's a part in the song about working in a factory, and they are just stuck there.
Speaker: They can't leave because the song didn't end.
Speaker: And so they live like a lifetime in this factory where like Red Guy, who wants no responsibility at all, becomes like an executive.
Speaker: It is brilliant. It's so good. It's exactly what I wanted it to be. And I can't wait for more episodes to so to to come on to drop out.
Speaker: It's... a It's done like a kid's show, but it's for adults. Adult themes and situations. that is a ah That is a premise that has been done several times to varying degrees of success, but it is quite good.
Speaker: Yeah, it's I feel like that is often read as like, they're going to do a kid's show but make it crass. You know, like make it like sexual or do a lot of poop jokes or or like, you know, like like make it like raunchy.
Speaker: That's not what this is. There there are there are parts of it that are that can be violent, but like more than anything, it's just about sort of this like existential horror.
Speaker: And that's what I want. Yeah. um Don't Hug Me, I'm Scared, is on Dropout. And they have the entire web series on there. ah As of this recording, there's only one episode of the ah broadcast show, but they're going to have the rest. So yeah, definitely worth watching. All right, Chris, those are our Checks and Recs.
Speaker: It's time to talk about some comics. Let's do it.
Speaker: I think what we can call the texture choice for this week is Superman Spider-Man number one. To my knowledge, the only one of these that Marvel and DC will be putting out. Yeah, I haven't heard anything about them.
Speaker: ah Anyone doing another one that might make me personally mad. There's definitely not going to be one with a story written by the author of the, the writer of the worst comic of all time.
Speaker: Yes. The, the, writer who managed to ruin comics for decades in both directions. Yeah. I will say, um because this is the DC one, um Superman's name goes first.
Speaker: And so the logos, like his logos on top and Spider-Man's logos on the bottom. And it definitely should be the other way. Really?
Speaker: Because of the way they angle? Yeah. No, I think this is the way to go, because this way they complement each other. ah This way, I feel like it looks like they're going to like run into each other. i think the other way, I don't know. I feel like Spider-Man on top makes more sense to my eye, but ah I don't know. Either way, um this one's written by Mark Waid and has art by Jorge Jimenez and is very good.
Speaker: Yeah. It's all about the Clark Kent giving Peter Parker a ride to work. Which I think is very funny. I like that there's no, like... like In this main story, it's just like, yeah, yeah, Superman and Spider-Man, they've met each other before. They know each other. That's what's up.
Speaker: It's fine. There's no meetup. It starts immediately. They know each other, and they're working together. Somehow, the Daily Planet and the Daily Bugle have done like a photographer exchange where Peter is just Clark's photographer on an assignment at Star Labs.
Speaker: Yes. ah Now, in addition to that main story, which is very fun, we get a Lois Lane and Mary Jane story, which I didn't read because Tom King wrote it and Jim Lee ah did the art, which means I kind of like scanned through it, and it's fun to see Jim Lee draw Spidey again. It's it's fine, but it's also like so out of continuity for everybody. Well, it's what's wild is the whole thing builds up to Gambit showing up.
Speaker: Yeah, because they're fighting they're fighting a sentinel. And I gotta say, it's actually really fun to see Jim Lee draw Gambit again. Yeah, that's i mean that's that's a Jim Lee-ass Gambit.
Speaker: Yeah, man. ah He flexed the old muscles on that. Yeah. ah Then we get a ah Christopher Priest... Superboy Prime and Spider-Man's story, which is pretty fun. Which is fucking buck wild weird. Yeah, it's Bananas. That's Priest with Daniel Semperi and Alejandro Sanchez and Willie Schubert.
Speaker: But I mean, it's Priest. It's Priest getting weird with it. I love it. Yeah, yeah. ah We get a Superboy and ah Spider-Man 2099 story, which was weird.
Speaker: Because it feels like it's half story. By Sean Murphy. so Sean Murphy with ah Simon Goh and Endworld Design as the letterer. Yeah, it's weird. Batman Beyond shows up.
Speaker: Yeah, the money... is Jimmy Con Carnage, which is a Jimmy Olsen and Carnage story by Matt Fraction, Steve Lieber, Nathan Fairbairn, and Clayton Coles.
Speaker: that is that's That's the money. where where The carnage is just going to murder Jimmy Olsen. That's the whole... That's the one that ah that I ah took a picture of the the box that says, What God is it here to whom you pray, Jimmy Olsen? What sheltering hand of which benevolent force of wisdom and power exactly do you petition now with prayer?
Speaker: Which is some extremely hard narration. Yeah. But yeah, Jimmy Olsen fights carnage. it It goes exactly as you would expect.
Speaker: Yep. Yep. ah Delightful. We get a Jonathan Kent and Ben Parker story by Jeff Lemire, Rafa Sandoval, Ulysses Arreola, and Becca Carey.
Speaker: And I'm going to be straight up honest with you. I like Jeff Lemire. I like Rafa Sandoval. I didn't read this because I don't care about Jonathan Kent and Ben Parker. Fair.
Speaker: I simply do not care about them. They are not superheroes. Why would I want to read a story about them? it's It's not that much of a story, really. it's It turns out we're not so different, you and I. Yeah, I mean, it's it's ah it's about how they inspired both Superman and Spider-Man. That's really all it's about. Yeah, which you probably knew that.
Speaker: Yeah. ah We get a really fun Greg Rucka, Nicholas Scott ah story with ah Marcelo Maiolo and Ariana Mayer called Bias, which is Daily Planet and Daily Bugle. So it's it's it's J. Jonah Jameson and Lois, yeah not J. Jonah Jameson and Perry White, which is good because Perry gets destroyed in that in that story.
Speaker: ah But it's, yeah, it's like them on like ah like a news show where they're having a debate about whether superheroes should wear masks or not. I like it because ah J. Joe Jensen's like, yeah, i don't like Spider-Man because he wears a mask. He's not like all the heroes I i respect, like the Fantastic Four and Captain America.
Speaker: I want to be like, you sure about that? I mean, I guess people know who Cap is. but Yeah, no, I think it's very intentional. Yeah. Well, yeah, Jonah's a bit of a dickhead.
Speaker: Yeah. um And then there's a Gail Simone, Belen Ortega, Jordi Belair, Lucas Gattoni, Power Girl and Punisher story, which is which is fun. which is Which is very fun, yeah yeah. Which I will say, got the biggest pop of the week out of me.
Speaker: And you know why, Matt, because your favorite character showed up. Yeah, man. Yeah, man. Fucking Paul. Paul's in there. and And Punisher, like, ah like threatens him.
Speaker: Yeah, man. Paul gonna be in a movie. Paul's existence has become something that that I was annoyed by, and now I think is fucking hilarious.
Speaker: Like, because people hate Paul so much, I'm delighted every time he shows up. Yeah, it's like, we have gone... Like, remember when Gritty came out?
Speaker: Yeah. And everybody was like, what the fuck is that? And then when everybody was like, what the fuck is that? Philadelphia was like, hey, fuck you. That's Gritty. He's one of us. Yeah.
Speaker: That is how I feel about Paul. It's like, oh, you hate him? I love him. He's my favorite character. ah One last thing about the main story that – well, two things about the main story.
Speaker: I really appreciate the whole thing where like so Superman and Spider-Man assume – so the two villains are Doc Ock and Brainiac. And like Superman assumes that Brainiac's going to be in like the space station – And Spider-Man assumes that Doc Ock is going to be on like the terres in the like the terrestrial lab. And then they go to those two places, and it's the reverse.
Speaker: yeah And so Superman ends up fighting Doc Ock, and Spider-Man ends up fighting Brainiac, and I love that. It's really fun. it's ah yeah it's It's a really fun way to get to ah subvert the the expectations that even the the characters have. Like,
Speaker: In retrospect, it's like, well, yeah, obviously Superman's going to fight Spider-Man's guy because because that's that's how a crossover works, and you don't see that all the time.
Speaker: yeah But it's set up really well in the comic, too. like this This Mark Waid kid think he's going places. And also, um Spider-Man does the thing in this story. And um Jorge Jimenez drawing that is rad. Boy, Jorge Jimenez is about a good-ass artist.
Speaker: Yeah. ah So, good shit. I should say, this main story looks beautiful. Yeah. Jorge Jimenez. like i'm I'm glad Jorge Jimenez has been drawing Batman.
Speaker: Because that is a book that I love. But I wouldn't be mad if he was drawing Superman or Spider-Man or Justice League or anything. Yeah, I mean, i i would happily ah read whatever he's he's doing the art on.
Speaker: Speaking of which, Batman number eight. all Hey, when did Poison Ivy get elected mayor of Gotham City? Because I missed that.
Speaker: Oh, i i don't know I don't know either. god Poison Ivy is the mayor of Gotham City. Don't get me wrong, I love that. yeah Police Commissioner Vandal Savage spends this ah this issue working out a plan with Mayor Pamela Isley, who is green.
Speaker: ah By the way, i Jorge Jimenez does not actually do the art on this specific issue specifically. ah Ryan Sook is doing the art on this issue. Yes, Ryan Sook does the art. Jorge Amenez does do the cover on this one. Yeah, yeah. um Which has a great annoyed Poison Ivy face on it that is just ma perfect. But yeah, Ryan Sook, no joke.
Speaker: Yeah, no slouch himself. Yeah, especially given a book that is largely... three really talky um sequences.
Speaker: Like, there's very little action-action in this book. It's Vandal Savage having a meeting with ah Mayor Isley. ah It is a an older guy and a younger guy talking to each other about life.
Speaker: And it is ah Batman and the Golden Age Green Lantern having coffee at a diner with Batman in full costume. And... At one point, Alan Scott goes, Hey man, why are we at a diner with you in full costume?
Speaker: And Batman's answer to that is dope. It's extremely good. So, ah unsurprisingly, another high recommendation for the Matt Fraction Batman run from you boys.
Speaker: Yeah, good shit. ah Finally, Chris, you wanted to talk about Absolute Superman number 18. A new story starts here. A new story starts here! ah Yes, it's Jason Aaron, ah Rafa Sandoval, Ulysses Ariola, and Becca Carey. Again, that same team that we saw.
Speaker: Same art team that we saw prior to this. oh And this is the first part of a story that hilariously is called Reign of the Supermen.
Speaker: And if you're wondering, fuck yeah, Steel's in this.
Speaker: Hell yeah, Steel's in this. And that's exciting. But the main thrust of it, as you can probably tell from the cover, is that this is a Black Adam story.
Speaker: And as much as I like Absolute Superman, I think Absolute Superman has been stellar since it started. And as much as I like... I'll read anything Jason Aaron does. I have been in the Jason Aaron tank for 15 years now.
Speaker: ah let's Let's go. Down since Ghost Rider. Baby. DC has successfully killed any interest I have in Black Adam. Unless Priest wants to come back.
Speaker: That's the only thing that'll do it at this point. i' like ah I mean, maybe apps maybe Absolute Black Adam is interesting. I mean, Absolute Black Adam seems a lot like Black Adam.
Speaker: Well, he's called ah King Shazam. He's called King Shazam. But it is it is Teth Adam. and And we get his his origin story. um it It is different.
Speaker: Because there is no Wizard Shazam involved. Instead, he is um given his powers by being experimented on by Brainiacs. Like the Brainiacs from Other Dimensions.
Speaker: which ah Those freaks? Those mega freaks? or this No, these are the ones that aren't the freak. Oh, right, right, right, right. Because remember, there used to be brainiacs that aren't super freaks. Right, there's the one brainiac who's a total freak.
Speaker: And then the rest of them are... Yeah, yeah, yeah. don't know, maybe this is really going to change the hierarchy of power in the absolute DC universe. Time will tell. Time will tell.
Speaker: Time will tell. Well, speaking of what time will tell, Chris... I think it's time to tell who, which member of the Fantastic Four is going to die. It's Johnny.
Speaker: In three. It's Johnny. It's time for Hick Mania. Johnny's going to die.
Speaker: Fantastic Four, number 583.
Speaker: has... ah the the The quotes are gone. The quotes atop the the title of the book, they're not there anymore. All we have are three, in quotation marks, the title of the story, and Countdown to Casualty that says there's a four, or three, a two, and a one. Four is highlighted, and it is like the Fantastic Four logo.
Speaker: On this cover by Alan Davis... ah We have the four members of the Fantastic Four looking around confused in a graveyard. And there is a Fantastic Four logo-shaped gravestone that says, Here lies blank devoted member of the Fantastic Four.
Speaker: It's weird that they didn't it's really that they didn't like put Johnny's name on it. well So that we would know. ah yeah it it's weird Yeah, it's weird that they didn't specify.
Speaker: Before we get into this... I will say, one, this is my favorite run of issues of the run so far. that My favorite like set of issues of the run so far.
Speaker: And two, a big part of that is that I think Hickman here, and this is Steve Epting debuting as the artist on the book, which helps a lot. That might have something to do why it is our our favorite set of issues so far.
Speaker: um But also, I think Hickman does a very good job of putting every member of the team in plausible danger. Yes. I was going to talk about that a little bit. um Both in terms of of Steve Epting showing up, which, by the way, South Carolina Dream Team.
Speaker: Jonathan Hickman, Steve Epting together at last. This is it. This is the South Carolina Dream Team on Fantastic Four. i mean, maybe if me and Chad had a backup. Same for green.
Speaker: But, you know, it's it's it's South Carolina. First of all, it's hilarious that we're still getting the like inset art, like the headshots drawn by Dale Eaglesham.
Speaker: When on that like he dream he's got that thick reed that he liked to draw, who does not look like the Reed Richards that Alan Davis is drawing. No, not even close. They're like they're very different.
Speaker: It's very funny. But also, yeah. I remember at the time, this being like, and see if you you remember this as well.
Speaker: I remember it being, like, everyone thinking it was obviously going to be Sue. And then like realizing, like oh no, it's going Johnny.
Speaker: But going back and reading it, even knowing, obviously, that it's it's Johnny who gets got, it it does really put all of them in separate, plausible dangers.
Speaker: yeah And I thought that was a really nice touch. Well, Ben and Johnny are in the same situation yeah together. But Ben is is Ben.
Speaker: But Ben is not Rocky. yeah yeah he's He's just human ah when this is all going on. so um yeah's Everybody is in plausible danger. i don't remember what the predictions were of which of the four were going to die. I think that there was probably a sense of it would be a fake out and none of them would.
Speaker: And so when it does ultimately end up being Johnny in a very kind of like as real as comics get sort of death sequence, um I think people were really affected and blindsided by that.
Speaker: isn That's what I remember from the time, ah which was, this was still like 2010, probably 2011, maybe. let me see what year these came out. Yeah. It was still 2010 when this started.
Speaker: So let's start with issue number 583. We begin with a big battle in the neutral zone. The Fantastic Four is here fighting against some some creatures.
Speaker: ah Ben's helmet... i wait Oh, sorry. sorry i thought you said the negative zone. You said the neutral zone. That's correct. the neutral zone yeah um Ben's ah helmet gets smashed, and um almost immediately he gets that like monkey head...
Speaker: Yeah. He begins to devolve. because Because this is the this is the High Evolutionary's city um with the the de-evolutionary ah you know ah atmosphere, I guess. Y'all know the High Evolutionary? Yeah. And his weird city that he's in? It's it's one of the four cities.
Speaker: Yeah. um But that up to this battle we only see for one page. Yeah. Before we pivot to Valeria Richards in the Baxter building, sneaking out of her room.
Speaker: And going into Reed's secret lab, where she finds the bridge. Yeah, and her being like, we gotta do something about these security measures. Yeah. It's very good.
Speaker: So she finds the bridge, and a like ah an AI version, a holographic version of Reed, activates... And the art on that like holographic read that's like green and kind of pixelated, I love it.
Speaker: Yeah, it's very cool. Epting is really good at that. Yeah, man. Steve Epting's good at drawing comic books. Yeah. Steve Epting's good as hell. But this holographic read tells Valeria everything.
Speaker: He's like, oh yeah, I built this bridge. Sue told me to deconstruct it, so I did, but then I put it back together. And so Valeria's like, mom's going to kill you, dude.
Speaker: And then ah he explains that there was a council of reeds that he had to quit because – ah because They didn't have families. He would have had to give up his family. Yeah.
Speaker: Now knowing all of this, Valeria goes and finds Doctor Doom. She goes to Latveria. She teleports to Latveria. And ah talks to Doctor Doom.
Speaker: And she's like, hey, my dad fucked up. And Doctor Doom's like, Um...
Speaker: of He was part of this council. He quit. They were trying to like ah fix everything, and it didn't work. And so I went and met them. And I think my dad made the wrong choice.
Speaker: and so And I've been told that all hope lies in you. My dad's going to need your help, so will you help me? And Doom's like, why should I? Like, why should I help Reed Richards?
Speaker: And she's like, well, I know you've got a problem. ah Like, you've you've suffered some brain damage. And it keeps flashing back to the Mark Miller run.
Speaker: Yeah, i was I was trying to figure that out, but I was like, eventually I was like, oh is the Mark Miller run. I don't need to know if this happened. Yeah, ah' it's I think it's stuff having to do with New Earth.
Speaker: I know there's also a story in the Mark Miller run where Doom like fights his mentor, um Well, who cares? Doesn't matter. he He's compromised and has had some brain damage. And Valeria's like, look, I'll help you with that if you help my dad um do what he needs to do. And Doom's like, okay, fine. Doom's bringing back Kristoff.
Speaker: Yes. doom is Doom thinks he's too compromised to lead Latveria, so he's bringing Kristoff in to take over for him. Kristoff, Bernard, his son...
Speaker: um who's actually a clone of him, right? I don't know. Like, I don't, honestly, i don't know what's up. Like, Kristoff shows up in this run, and he's like a cyborg now, and I was like, man, I do not know when that happened.
Speaker: like I feel like I had not checked in on Kristoff since the burn run. Oh, okay. Kristoff is um adopted. he's in He's Doom's adopted son.
Speaker: He's not a clone. He is the son of a Latverian woman who was still loyal to Doom during a rebellion. And so after she died, he adopted him.
Speaker: That's Kristoff's backstory. um Okay, so that's all the Valerian Doom stuff. We do eventually cut back to the fight in the neutral zone where ben has become like Monkey Ben.
Speaker: um it seems like the the the High Evolutionary has even raised the power of this place even more, and so Sue has to like cover it up with a force field.
Speaker: It's going to explode and ah devolve a Everyone for 100 miles in every direction. Yeah. um So Sue seals it off with Force Field, and then Johnny like burns off all the gas um that's around. And after a job well done, the Fantastic Four comes home.
Speaker: Ben's still got his monkey head. um And because of that, ah he is... He's going to consider taking the serum to make him not the thing for a week.
Speaker: ah And then there's a quick little epilogue where the Silver Surfer finds Galactus' dead body. And is not happy about it. And is not happy about it. The Silver Surfer got some complicated feelings about Galactus.
Speaker: no No shit, man. um Fantastic Four number is 584. Countdown to Casualty is down to three now. And our Alan Davis cover is like all the rocks falling off of Ben Grimm's body.
Speaker: Which pretty cool, because it's like it's like Ben pulling... his his thing exterior off. It kind of looks like um in Furious 7 when the rock flexes out of his cast. But it's his whole body.
Speaker: But it's his whole body and it's rocks instead of a cast. Yes. yes yeah Daddy's gotta go to work, Matt. Ben says something very similar to this. he really does. I did.
Speaker: I made a note of it.
Speaker: Alright, this issue, a three-part two, starts with Ben looking in the mirror, looking at his like devolved self. um He's not happy with how he looks. he It's taken him too long to revert back to normal, even though he he eventually does.
Speaker: And ah he's he's kind of deciding, like, I'm going to turn back human for a little while. I'm going to take that serum. ah Meanwhile, Sue is leaving. She's heading for Atlantis to broker a deal between Namor and the ancient Atlanteans we met a few issues ago.
Speaker: So she gets in the fantastic car and leaves.
Speaker: And tells Reed to take care of the house. ah Ben drinks the serum, even though Johnny gives him a hard time about it, and immediately reverts back into his human form.
Speaker: um And Johnny does a little like jokey joke about how Ben transformed into something hideous, when in fact he's just turned into a person. Yeah, and Ben is quite regularly like, you motherfucker.
Speaker: And then Johnny's like, look. You know. No hard feelings. I'm going to show you the best day you've had in a long time. So they walk around downtown with nobody giving Ben a second look.
Speaker: They go to a Giants game. don't know how they got to that stadium and back. in that's That's how you know Jonathan Hickman is not from New York. Because they're walking downtown at 1145. They're at the stadium at 115. The stadium, which is in New Jersey.
Speaker: Yeah. yeah um But what I don't understand is how they could use the Giants logo. The actual Giants NFL logo. don't know, man.
Speaker: How did they get away with that?
Speaker: Beats me. By 5.45, they're having dinner with San Lee and Jack Kirby. yeah Yeah. That's just straight up San Lee and Jack Kirby that they're having dinner with.
Speaker: um And then at 8.30, they're at like a superhero poker game where everybody else is in costume, but Ben is just a regular guy dressed in regular clothes. Well, usually, ben is... is like Everybody's in costume.
Speaker: So it's fun it's fun that Ben is... ah is In normal guy mode, but he's still doing like a Ben Grimm thing. Yeah. Yeah. Pretty fun. um And ah so they have a great day.
Speaker: ah Ben and Johnny are back walking around on on the street by 1035. They get attacked by the Yancey Street gang. And i cannot imagine a more 2010 kind of joke.
Speaker: I mean, yeah. this is I think it's pretty funny, but it is a very... I mean, they literally talk about the 2008 financial crash. so Yes. And so the Yancey Street Gang has become like all like ex-finance guys.
Speaker: And it ends with Ben punching one of them and saying, I want my 401k back. And like... Look, i you know...
Speaker: I get it. It's timely, but also, like, what a weird joke to put in a Fantastic Four comic book. Hey, so somebody call Martin Goodman, because this Marvel comic is timely. Yeah.
Speaker: Just, like,
Speaker: i wasn't reading this book in 2010, obviously, but um if I had been, like, this joke might have been for me.
Speaker: And I don't know how many other readers. i mean it's it's the it got a It got a nice little chuckle out of me. Speaking of art of it being 2010, remember Utopia?
Speaker: Yeah, man, Utopia. Remember when they were in on Utopia? That was the first time they went and lived on an island. Sue arrives on Utopia, meets up with Emma Frost and Cyclops, who then...
Speaker: say, like, here's Namor, and so there's Namor, and Sue is basically like, um we're going to go meet these other Atlanteans and you're going to behave.
Speaker: and And that's exactly what happens, and it all works out. Exactly as Sue anticipates. It all works out just fine. Namor's an asshole. ah We cut back to Johnny and Ben.
Speaker: Johnny takes Ben to Alicia Master's apartment, and Alicia touches Ben's face, sees that he's not a Rocky man ah anymore for a little bit. He says, it's me, Alicia. They both cry, and I guess they fuck.
Speaker: I mean, yeah. Yeah, matt Matt, was that... it Was that in doubt for you? I mean, i don't know. it's It's not shown. It's just their silhouettes are in a window.
Speaker: Johnny watches from down on the street, and he says, good for you, Ben. Yeah, man I mean, Matt, they might as well be playing Baker Street.
Speaker: Come on, dog. Get with it. Be for real. ah Meanwhile, Reed Richards is on the rooftop of the Baxter building looking at some readings.
Speaker: And Silver Surfer shows up and he's like, hey, I'm pissed off because I found Galactus's dead body. What happened? And Reed is like, oh, um that's Galactus from the future who I had to bring. i had to bring his dead body back here.
Speaker: And then a live Galactus shows up and is like, okay, we got to figure out what's going on here. And that is the end of the issue. There's a really great sequence where Silver Surfer is like, you know, hey, what's I know you were at this big dead Galactus body.
Speaker: What's up with that? And Reed goes, it's difficult to explain. And there's just a panel of the Silver Surfer looking mad. yeah And then Reed goes, what I mean, of course, is I can explain it to you.
Speaker: Very good. Right. He knows that Reed was involved with this dead Galactus because of some kind of radiation signature that leads him to Reed. They got them cosmic rays.
Speaker: Fantastic Four number 585.
Speaker: has a cover of just like Namor standing some fish with Sue in like a diving suit, but it's a very form fitting diving suit, uh, like grabbing onto his leg. Like it's a Frank Frazetta cover. it yeah like It's like the army of darkness box art.
Speaker: That is kind of what it looks like. Yeah. Yeah. Which I don't think is very inffative indicative of their dynamic. but It is not. I feel like this is what... like There should be a caption it that's like, this is what's happening in Namor's head.
Speaker: Yeah, very much This is what Namor thinks is going on. Yes, absolutely. Back to Johnny and Ben at the start of the issue. It's 1225 AM. They're driving.
Speaker: All of a sudden, um they see Galactus in the sky. And they're like, oh shit. And so Johnny takes off flying toward Galactus and Ben stays down on the street because he's just Ben Grimm.
Speaker: And Reed tries to explain what happened with Galactus. Again, this is from the Miller run, so who cares? But... Reed is like, there was this group of people in the future. ah The Earth was dying. They needed an energy source, and Galactus was their energy source.
Speaker: And so then ah we brought his carcass back here, and Galactus is like, okay, we're going to go to where those people are, and you're coming with me.
Speaker: And Johnny's like, wait, wait, wait, hang on a second. And Reed's like, no, i gotta go. You stay here. You and Ben hold things down here. And I'm gonna go with Galactus.
Speaker: And that's what happens. ah They leave and go to Taa-2. And Reed's like, I didn't even know you had this ship anymore. And Galactus is like, yeah, man, it's Taa-2. Yeah, man.
Speaker: All things she said. Taa-2. tattoo you You know I gotta have Taa too. I love Galactus' big old spaceship that is the size of a planet and shaped like a Mobius strip.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah man. Galactus is great. It's his recreation of his homeworld Taa. Yeah, it's Taa too. Sue, meanwhile, is under the sea in the central Pacific Basin.
Speaker: And she's like trying to hammer out negotiations between Namor and these other Atlanteans. And everybody's mad about it. Everybody's always mad about it.
Speaker: Everybody's mad about it. I ah i believe you skipped over Annihilus' death cult, because the Anti-Priest is here. ah no i don't think We haven't seen the Anti-Priest yet.
Speaker: No, that's that's before the negotiations started, isn't i no i guess i it's not I guess it's not. There's a bit where Sue and Namor and Andromeda are just talking about what they're going to agree to.
Speaker: And Andromeda is really mad. Andromeda's like, all these things are below us Atlanteans. And Namor's like, no, no, no, I'll agree to the terms.
Speaker: I'll agree to the terms. Yeah, because he's like, Would this make you happy, Sue? yeah And Sue's like, yeah? and And he's like, she doesn't know, she doesn't trust you, but I do.
Speaker: i want And Sue's like, I want what's best for everyone. And Namor is kind of ah hard to read about that. Yeah, imperious cocks, man.
Speaker: and
Speaker: Now we get... ah The anti-priest. That's right. now Now we get ah the anti-priest of Annihilus' death cult, who's all who this says that death is a choice, and that he will offer that choice to everyone, and then it turns out he's Bugs?
Speaker: He's Bugs. he's made He's made of Bugs, yeah. He's he's Bugs, everybody. of everything in this, like I know there was some Negative Zone Annihilus stuff in the Four Cities,
Speaker: Yeah, you remember when Johnny went on that date? Yeah. But of all of this, this one is the one that seems to come the most out of nowhere. i mean, it it is set up. It is very much set up.
Speaker: Yeah. ah By Johnny going on a date with that girl who was Bugs. Johnny did go on a date with a girl who was Bugs. so And, you know, the anti-priest is here um to say that death is a choice.
Speaker: also Don't listen to him, though. He's Bugs. Just before that, um Johnny and Ben have a conversation where Ben is like, I don't think I'm going to have kids.
Speaker: Like, Johnny's like, having kids is all I want in the world. And Ben's like, I don't know. I don't think I i ever will. Which was like kind of a – that seems like an interesting thing to me because Ben asked Johnny, like, hey, have you ever thought about having kids? And Johnny's like, oh, yeah, it's what I want more than anything else in the world.
Speaker: That doesn't feel like what Johnny wants. Like, it that seems to come out of nowhere and is not followed up on at all.
Speaker: But like, do you feel like that's what Johnny wants more than anything in the world? it's It's a very, i'm I'm two weeks away from retirement. Yeah, that's true. Kind the line. It's like, ah yeah, I want to keep living and have a bunch of kids.
Speaker: I wish he would have said, I want to keep living and being alive. Yeah. Yeah. I can buy that Johnny wants a bunch of kids, and that is why he dates around so much.
Speaker: like Like, he's got this kind of playboy sensibility to him, but he really is looking for love. Like, I can kind of buy that. i mean, i um I find it much more plausible that Johnny wants to fuck.
Speaker: i i And I can also buy that Ben is would be on the fence about having kids. Well, I i feel like of the two of them... Ben wants to have kids, but most of the time he's a rock monster.
Speaker: yeah And you know like that's why he and Alicia end up adopting. like yeah There's a part of me that wonders, like was the dialogue flipped? like you know i mean I think it's exactly what it's meant to be. Yeah. It seems a little weird maybe for Johnny to say, but you know I appreciate seeing a Johnny who has matured somewhat ah instead of the one who's got to learn how to grow up.
Speaker: um Yeah, so I guess. I guess. It just seems like... It just seems like Ben would have been like, hold up, go back. You serious? sir Yeah. um Cut back to the Sue of it all.
Speaker: um Guess what? Namor lied. ah He is not going to agree to the terms of the deal. And in fact, he is going to stab a king. Yeah, he ah straight murders the king with a trident.
Speaker: Yep, and says Imperius Rex. This is where I will reveal this. Here are two things that are 100% true. One, Namor's a fucking asshole.
Speaker: Two, I fucking love Namor in this story. Namor's an asshole because Namor is an asshole. like He's a dickhead.
Speaker: And he's horny for Sue Storm. So, you know, Hickman and Neptune get it right. But yeah, Namor in this entire story is fucking hilarious.
Speaker: Well, his whole motivation is like, these guys, these ancient Atlanteans, the reason you haven't heard about them and the reason that they've been trapped for so long is because they're fucking pieces of shit and we don't want them. Yeah, that's what we get ah in the next issue. We get the explanation.
Speaker: yeah um Fantastic Four number 586 has Countdown to Casualty on the cover. We're down to one. um And on the cover, Reed is tying Galactus up ah with his stretchy body.
Speaker: Matt, did you choose to make that sound as horny as you made that sound? I mean, you can look at the cover and and determine if I described it correctly. It's like, for some reason, like you said it very flatly, but your word choice, added tone
Speaker: So it's... I believe that I accurately described what is happening on this cover. No, you did. He's tying him up with his stretchy body. Yeah, that's what he's doing. ah So we start back in with the Namor of it all immediately.
Speaker: And ah the other Atlanteans, because there were four there were four groups of the other Atlanteans. Namor only killed one of the kings. um But the other Atlanteans are like, okay, we got to kill them.
Speaker: And Sue's like, no, no, no, wait, wait, wait. No, this is not going to happen. And she realizes that this has been Namor's plan all along and that he set all this up. And there are definitely ships headed to this base to destroy it.
Speaker: And so she puts up a force field to keep them out. Yeah.
Speaker: Meanwhile, Reed is on Tatu with Galactus. And wouldn't you know it, um they meet ah Ted and Alyssa, who are here, from New Earth.
Speaker: And Reed finds out about all that stuff that's been happening on New Earth in the previous issues. Which I feel like doesn't... wind up mattering at all?
Speaker: I mean, it matters some. like you know We hear that Alyssa died, but she ah has been brought back to life as like an android. But this is is this the... yeah Okay, so this is the Ted and Alyssa from New Earth.
Speaker: But there're they were on Earth Earth, right? No, they were on New Earth. Well, these are the people that Galactus and Silver Surfer back to get. right Yes. yes he So I think they got picked up from New Earth, and um and now they're here.
Speaker: Or maybe they came back to Earth? i don't really remember. think they were on regular Earth. it's a late It's a little confusing. Because yeah everything that had been happening on New Earth, we were getting in very light tiny snippets.
Speaker: To his credit. Jonathan Hickman really expects you to have read The Run immediately before his. for sure. Which you cannot say about Grant Morrison ever.
Speaker: ah But, like... Galactus is is bound and determined to figure out like the situation on New Earth, and essentially he wants to destroy it.
Speaker: ah So that that's where they're going. Yeah, because he's like, yeah, they fucking killed me. Yeah. So I found out about it. I'm going to kill them now.
Speaker: Yeah, he doesn't even want to consume New Earth. He just wants to destroy it. Yeah, he's got like a really good line where he like explains, Reed explains what happens ah with like that Earth's sun and everything and how they they came back in time.
Speaker: And he's like, ah yeah, I'm going to kill this whole planet now. And Reed says, you cannot kill all of them. And Galactus says, who tests God and does not wager their life?
Speaker: Which is dope as hell. Great line. great well yeah ah Meanwhile, back ah with the anti-priest, he's like, okay, now it's time for us to all go attack the Baxter building. Because we're going to go through Reed Richards' portal into the Zone. They're going to open the portal yeah from this side and let like rip open and an even bigger portal in the Negative Zone and Annihilation 2 is going to happen on Earth.
Speaker: Yes, they're they're going to unleash an an annihilation wave on Earth um through the portal in the Baxter building. Which is a nice again nice callback to some previous comics.
Speaker: Yeah. ah So a bunch of anti-priest agents teleport into the Baxter building.
Speaker: and just start attacking. Like, they attack Ben and Johnny, but then they also attack, like, the Moloids who are here.
Speaker: And ah that, ah ah and Alex Power. and Alex Power uses his Alex Powers, and ah that shit looks dope. Yes, Steve Efting, man.
Speaker: Yeah, he's he's got like, he turns them into JPEG artifacts. Pretty much, yeah. It's great. I love it. ill What Alex Power does, because ah Johnny shows up, he's like, oh my god, Alex, do you kill those guys?
Speaker: Alex Power's like, no man, they're bugs. and Those dudes is bugs. Yeah, so they didn't appear as bugs they didn't appear as bugs when they arrived, but Alex could see that they were bugs from the get-go. Yeah, ah so he he's like, yeah, I just made their heads too heavy for their bodies to support. And so all of these Annihilus bugs, their bodies are crushed by their heads.
Speaker: That's great. Yeah. That's that's fun. So, back on New World... Galactus asks Reed, like, hey, so the reason you had to kill me is because in the future, this world became unsustainable and needed a power source and I was the power source.
Speaker: Do you envision a version of the future where that doesn't happen? And Reed thinks back to the Council of Reed's. And that planet that they made that was all like food crops.
Speaker: And he's like, yes, I could do that. There's a way to avoid that. And I also like that he's like, look, even if I can't fix the sun, which I'm pretty sure I can.
Speaker: Yeah. ah And Galactus is like, okay, ah well... would you do that?
Speaker: And Reed's like, well, the cost is really high. And Galactus is like, well, you better do it. Galactus like, yeah, so you got to do that or else I'm going to just destroy the Earth now.
Speaker: Right. And so ah Reed and Alyssa and what's the other fucking guy's name? Tom? Ted.
Speaker: Ted, um they take off because as it turns out... every inhabitant of new world is actually in one consciousness.
Speaker: And so all they have to do is save that one consciousness to save new world. All they have to do is save MTV's the head. Yes. Uh, to save like all the people of new world. So they take off to try to do that. Sue at this base in the Gulf of Thailand, Namor isn't bending.
Speaker: The other Atlanteans aren't, uh, making any compromises. And Namor's like, listen, these guys suck. Well, first he shows and Sue's like in a lotus position pose trying to keep this dome up around yeah oh this Atlantean settlement. And Namor just walks in and goes, you look lovely.
Speaker: And Sue just scowls at him. Hilarious. Yeah, never was like, hey, these guys fucking suck, dude. Yeah, like, they were going to kill all of us. They were essentially parasites.
Speaker: And ah we had to put them down. And that's what they're going to do again. and they're using you. They're going to just make you into a sacrifice, and they're going to kill you.
Speaker: And my question is, why didn't you mention this before now, Namor? Because he's an asshole! He was like, I had to see them before I acted. Like, yeah, it's like he had to use Susan to get to them so he could try to kill them.
Speaker: Because he's asshole and he thought it would make him look cool. Yeah. ah Back at the Baxter building, um the fight is on.
Speaker: Bentley, the – is he the clone of the wizard? Yeah, the clone of the wizard. um He's making bombs. and He makes a bomb, and then before he throws it, because he makes like a grenade, he goes, I love you.
Speaker: Which is very funny. To the bomb. And he kisses it. Yeah. He kisses it. um Johnny finds Valeria, and they're talking about whether um the portal to the negative zone will hold.
Speaker: But then it just gets swarmed by bugs, who then open it. And... ah ah An invading force of ah negative zone bugs comes comes piling out.
Speaker: I like that there's a couple of them who look like the mutants from Dark Knight Returns. They're wearing those kind of helmets, yeah. They're wearing those those hats. Very fun. Fantastic Four number 587. The countdown has ended.
Speaker: countdown is ah is has ended And so this cover is all four members of the Fantastic Four looking like they're about to die, and the four ah symbol like ah shattered yeah in the middle.
Speaker: So again, going into this issue, we've got Reed on a planet that is being actively destroyed by Galactus, yes Sue trapped with these ancient Atlanteans, and Namor having just told her, oh, they're going to kill you.
Speaker: Yeah. like And then ah Johnny and Ben fighting the second Annihilation Wave, which destroyed Space Empires.
Speaker: Correct. ah Which is invading the Baxter Building.
Speaker: And ah the first couple pages just kind of review this. Yeah. Sue in in the Gulf of Thailand, Reed on New World, and Johnny and Ben in the Baxter Building fighting off an Annihilation Wave.
Speaker: ah We start in on the anniation Annihilation Wave coming in Everybody's trying to fight them off. This is such a good moment. This is like almost, you've had your chance, now it's my turn.
Speaker: Yeah. Because what happens is oh Leech starts yelling, punch. so' like Punch! Punch!
Speaker: And Ben's like, yeah, I'm fucking trying to punch these guys. And Valeria picks up a piece of Kirby machinery and knocks him out. And she goes, oh, he wanted us to knock him out.
Speaker: And ah Johnny goes, why would? And then Franklin shows up. Yeah. Fran's like, by the way, I have my powers back. I am the most powerful um mutant who has ever lived and will ever live. And just like, it's dope.
Speaker: Yeah, he just, ah hes he says he's bug spray. And he just like lights up all of these bugs. And like they are charred remains on the floor.
Speaker: after he explodes in power to kill all these bugs. And Johnny's like, what are you talking about? Franklin got his powers back. And Valeria's like, haven't you been reading the last few issues? Yeah, man, you do not pay attention, huh? He should have known from the arcade story, to be honest, that Franklin had his powers back. Yeah, I guess he wasn't there when Franklin shot Norman Osborn. Yeah.
Speaker: yeah But he was there for the arcade thing. ah The arcade impossible man thing. Yes. um So Valeria informs Johnny and Ben that the controls that are going to shut the portal are on the other side.
Speaker: Because the ones on their side have been destroyed. So they have to go through, turn it on manually, and then come back before people on the other side know that the doorway is open.
Speaker: And so they've got to formulate a plan to get in there, shut the portal, and then come back in. And so they're they're gearing up for that as the scene ends.
Speaker: Cut to the Gulf of Thailand. The ancient Atlanteans explain that they've changed.
Speaker: Over these like hundreds of years that they've been away. but like Like thousands of years? Yeah. They're not going to sacrifice Susan.
Speaker: In fact, they are going to make her their queen. Yeah. Since Namor has killed the the king... Sue is now the leader of the ancient Atlanteans.
Speaker: Yes. Which is is a delightfully bananas twist. Yeah. ah Because like there's still thing where it's like, oh, they could probably still assassinate you.
Speaker: Probably, yes. they They might actually have more of a reason to now. ah Then we catch up with Reed, and I've already kind of said what is explained here, which is that the entirety of the inhabitants of New Earth are in the brain of Mother X the World Mind, who MTV's The Head. MTV's The Head.
Speaker: is her With her big chair to support her giant brain. Back to um the negative zone, Ben and Franklin and Johnny and the rest are um making their way through, ah trying to close it down.
Speaker: And essentially, ah what they find is that um it's like... encoded and locked down so that, long story short, somebody's going to have to stay behind.
Speaker: Yeah. And we get like a really fun sequence where all the kids are like talking, and in ah true ah Jonathan Hickman writing kid genius ah fashion, um they're all just talking like adult scientists. Yeah.
Speaker: yeah And at one point, Bentley's like, we should just nuke this place. And then all the kids look at each other, and Alex Bauer's like, I mean, we could. And Bentley keeps saying like what their odds of success are, which are very low.
Speaker: ah But Valeria's like, somebody's going to have to stay behind. That's where we leave it. Back in the Gulf of Thailand, Namor's like, you've got to be fucking kidding me. you're They're not going to make you queen.
Speaker: And they're like, no, no, no. We are going to make her queen. And then Sue immediately leans into her power, and she's like, okay, if I'm the queen, Namor, you're going to honor the deal that we made.
Speaker: am forcing you to honor the deal that we made.
Speaker: And yeah he like grabs her – she's wearing like a cape, and he like grabs her cape. And she forcefields up like a gauntlet on her hand and knocks him away.
Speaker: And she says, honor the deal anymore. I'm done asking nicely. And it whips ass. It's great. It's so cool. It's one of the coolest Sue Storm moments. It's also good because Namor is bulletproof. Namor has punched and been punched by the Hulk. And sue lays him out with a fucking spinning back fist like Aja Kong. It owns.
Speaker: It's so good. And then Namor's like, you dare. and Susan's like, fuck you. I'm a queen that bows to no king. And Namor looks up at her and goes, God, you're magnificent. Are these such an asshole at rules? There's a panel of Sue just rolling her eyes at that, which is pretty great. And then she's like, you're going to honor the agreement. She finally puts her foot down and says, you're going to honor the agreement.
Speaker: um On New World, um they get saved by um the maestro. who is the maestro version of Hulk Jr. He's the Hulk Jr. turned into maestro.
Speaker: yeah We learned about that a few issues ago, that Hulk Jr. became the maestro. um And he gives them enough time to leave ah before Galactus destroys New Earth, which he does. After he's like, look, I'm coming with you. And then they're like, no.
Speaker: And he's like, well, then we're all going to die together. Because i I will keep you here. And Reed's like, fucking just let him, we'll figure it out. Yeah. And then they do leave. And then there's just a panel of Galactus busting up New World.
Speaker: In the negative zone, um Ben has resigned himself to being the one who stays behind. Yeah. like And he's like, hey, just had the best week of my life.
Speaker: It's okay. ah you know I'll stay here. I'm Ben Grimm. I'm the thing. this is This is kind of my thing that I do. yeah you guys go ahead.
Speaker: if If one of us is going to self-sacrifice, it's obviously going to be It's obviously going to be me, Ben Grimm. yeah um I do have to say, what okay we've said a lot of good things about Steve Epting.
Speaker: yes I do have to register one complaint. I hate the way Johnny's hair looks. Yeah. he's got a He's got a real tight buzz.
Speaker: He looks like...
Speaker: so but He looks so much older than he should because of this haircut.
Speaker: It's very, like, not modern. It's weird because it's almost like it's almost like Steve Efting is is trying, not like photo referencing, but like trying to make him look like Chris Evans as Johnny Storm.
Speaker: Because that's the haircut he's got. Yeah. It doesn't look good, though. like it it it does like
Speaker: It should not be that kind of like perfect, I feel like. It it just it doesn't work. But nonetheless, um Ben insists on being the one that stays behind.
Speaker: Just as the portal is closing, just as everybody's getting out, Johnny grabs Ben and throws him through. Yeah. There's like a nearby explosion that kind of knocks Ben off balance. Johnny grabs him, chucks him through the portal and hits the button.
Speaker: Yep. So the thing closes, the the portal closes and Ben's like, you you stupid, no, open this back up. Open this back up. And Valeria's like, no, it's it's closed.
Speaker: It's done. And Valeria gives Johnny the... ah that codes to make sure it stays shut. Johnny does it. He engages the lock.
Speaker: Ben then turns back into the thing. Yeah, this is when the the thing where the the ah serum wears off. As Ben is pounding on the portal, ah he turns back into the thing.
Speaker: and In honestly, what is probably the best moment of the run so far, Johnny looks at him and goes, unbelievable. There's no way that, like, first of all, Ben might have survived.
Speaker: And there's no way that Johnny could have thrown Ben through the portal if he was the thing. If he was the thing, he couldn't have thrown him through. Unbelievable. It's it's a very Matt Wilson moment from Johnny Storm. It is exactly what I would have said.
Speaker: i think you just would' have been like, okay. You know what? Fine. ah they touch They touch hands on opposite sides of the portal, and Johnny says, you don't wish it any more than I do.
Speaker: And then Johnny turns around. He says, so this is it, a billion to one. You think I'm afraid of that? You think I'm afraid of that? And he gets swarmed by bugs as he flames on.
Speaker: And this horde of bugs looks tough. Once again, they definitely look like Dark Knight Mutants. Dark Knight Returns Mutants. and Ben just watches as Johnny gets swarmed by the and Annihilation Wave.
Speaker: Yeah, and we get like a big two-page spread of Johnny just getting wrecked. Yeah. ah And then it just ends with...
Speaker: Ben with Franklin and Valeria sitting in front of the closed portal. ah Sad that Johnny's on the other side. And then, much like the night Gwen Stacy died, we get the story title on the last page.
Speaker: The Last Stand of Johnny Storm. Pretty good. Fantastic Four number 588. Fantastic.
Speaker: is ah our Funeral for a Friend issue. And also, the final issue of Fantastic Four.
Speaker: In big letters at the top, in a banner. Final issue. And um the Johnny Circle is empty. Nice touch. By the logo. Nice touch.
Speaker: um There is a like background shot of the Fantastic Four like going on a space adventure, but in the foreground are Reed, Sue, and Ben crying.
Speaker: A month of mourning, day one, on page one. By the way, Nick Dragata is doing the art on this issue. Is this the first collaborat collaboration of Jonathan Hickman and Nick Dragata?
Speaker: I we know think they had done an image book together before this. Had they already done the Manhattan Projects? think they done Manhattan Projects, yeah. Okay. The Avengers are rushing to the Baxter Building to try to stop the Annihilation Wave, but they're too late.
Speaker: ah And so they get there, and ah the portal is closed. Ben is sad. and Yeah, they're too late. ah Then we see Sue arrives, she gets the news, and she like collapses on the floor.
Speaker: um this issue but This story, by the way, is like ah so a silent story. Mostly silent. Up until pretty late in the issue.
Speaker: Yeah. um she ah like Sue obviously is taking it really hard. She is sitting on the bed. Reed, standing in the doorway, try to reaches tries to reach out to her. She like envelops herself in a force field and Reed stretches his hand over the force field in a bunch of different directions. so sue's Sue's really ah feeling hurt.
Speaker: Feeling sad. um Reed goes to a special like chamber inside the Baxter building and finds an ultimate nullifier. He goes to the portal.
Speaker: he He opens up like the outer shell of it and is like banging on it. He sees Annihilus through it. This was when Annihilus little baby.
Speaker: This was when Annihilus was a little guy, yeah. and Because I think post-Annihilation, he like had to like regenerate, right? Yes. Yeah. He just holds up a scrap of Johnny's costume and shows it to Reed.
Speaker: And he's like so disgusted that he just closes the portal, ah like the outer door to the portal. yeah like I feel like what Reed was threatening was like, hey, give me Johnny back, or I'll use the ultimate nullifier. And then i was just like, he dead, man.
Speaker: Yeah. I got a scrap of his costume. He gone. ah Then we get Johnny's funeral. And everybody's there. Lots of people are there.
Speaker: Here's my question. What's Psylocke doing there?
Speaker: Why wouldn't Psylocke be there? so like like i don't I don't feel like... so i have never seen Psylocke and Johnny Storm interact.
Speaker: ah Jessica Jones and Luke Cage brought their baby. To the funeral, yeah. To the funeral. um Where's Crystal? Yeah, man. Well, I guess the Inhumans are not there.
Speaker: sir For reasons. Where's Ligia? Where is Ligia? That's a great question. All of Johnny's exes should be there.
Speaker: Nonetheless, She-Hulk is there ah comforting ah Sue. And Ben is just like laid out in the corner, just sitting on the floor like a wreck.
Speaker: um Then we see Christoph Vernard taking over as the new ah monarch of Latveria. And man, that dude does, he is cyborg looking.
Speaker: He's got some some weird shit going on that I do not know about. yeah That means Doom can leave. So he does.
Speaker: And he shows up at Johnny's graveside. um And Johnny's grave rules. It is like a full body size statue of him with his hand out with a flame coming out of his the palm of his hand.
Speaker: Yeah. On a on a plinth. On a plinth. It's great. Here's here's what was what struck me about this sequence. I went back and reread this sequence like three times.
Speaker: yeah Because Doctor Doom shows up, yeah and we see Valeria seeing him, and then the rest of the FF don't react. And I was like... like well I feel like Doctor Doom's not going to start shit, because like Thor's there.
Speaker: Well, Sue does. Sue sue looks over at Reed. like It feels like they're aware he's there. um But we don't get a lot of follow-through on what Doom is there to do yeah yet. um Then um we just see Spider-Man like ah meet up with Franklin on a rooftop. That'll be expounded on more in a minute.
Speaker: um Then we see Valeria in the room where they're like writing on the board. The Future Foundation is writing on the board. It has like potential replacements for Johnny, who include She-Hulk, Storm, Black Panther, White Wingfoot, Alex Power, Luke Cage, and Iron Fist.
Speaker: She erases that off the board, and she just writes, to-do list, kill Annihilus. All right, look, I gotta Nothing.
Speaker: Nothing. Nothing. but respect for Wyatt Wingfoot.
Speaker: What the fuck's he doing on that list? I mean, Alex Power being on that list is pretty wild, too. i mean Alex Power got powers. He got powers, yeah. he turned he turned He made those Bugs' heads real heavy.
Speaker: He's still a kid, though. ah But yeah. um Then we get a sequence where... I mean, it's a matter of the choices between Storm, like the...
Speaker: like An Omega-level mutant worshipped as a god? And Black Panther, who is King Batman? And... a guy? Because Wyatt Wingfoot is just a guy. Yeah, that's true.
Speaker: Okay. Then we get a sequence. I might need your help to figure out exactly what is happening here. Okay. So... It's...
Speaker: ah Thor, who I guess is – this isn't Dr. Donald Blake. This is – Yeah, this is this is when – I believe Thor was Don Blake again at this time. Okay, he was Dr. Donald Blake. Yes. So this is Don Blake and Bruce Banner. It's Don Blake and Bruce Banner. They have they like are like out in the desert somewhere, ah having come on a Quinjet, and then been gri or the Thing arrives in a Fantasticar,
Speaker: And there's this bit where like they show Ben a hologram of Johnny. like Why are they showing him that?
Speaker: i think okay I think what happens is this. I think the hologram is so we know that they are talking about Johnny. okay like i don't know what they're saying, but we need to know they're talking about Johnny.
Speaker: like because do you do is is do you get some sense that like they're talking about like maybe we can save Johnny? i don't know. Because the the thing that they're showing him is the same pose as the grave marker, too. Right, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker: But they say they talk about Johnny, and then Ben's like, fuck off. and Yeah, and but Ben like shrugs them off. Yeah. Which makes Thor turn into Thor. Tom Blake turns into Thor.
Speaker: Yeah. that Well, yeah, first like Thor tries to stop Ben, and Ben like punches him. Then Bruce turns into the Hulk, and they fight for a while.
Speaker: And it's like a big drag out. Ben smashes the Fantasticar onto the Hulk. And ah it all just breaks down in Ben crying. Ben having a breakdown.
Speaker: Because what happened was Thor and Banner knew that by like they saw Ben at the rake, where he was just like... right where he was just like depressed, slumped against the wall.
Speaker: And they're the only ones that Ben can let it out on. so is ah Okay, so the is the idea just like, this is Bruce and, or, yeah, Hulk and Thor giving Ben an outlet to, like, get out some of his rage and grief?
Speaker: Yeah, because like hey when the fight, if you if you look at the fight where ah Ben's going up against the Hulk, Hulk stops fighting back. yeah And Ben is like beating on him, and then he finally like collapses, and then Hulk holds him up. like it's It's Banner and and Thor knowing that like
Speaker: this guy this guy's gotta get it out. And because he's the thing, he can't. you know yeah Ben Grimm can't punch a wall. Yeah, i I sort of got the sense – I mean, I knew that that's what was happening.
Speaker: Yeah. What I didn't understand was the conversation at the start about Johnny. Like, what – Yeah, i'm not I'm not sure what that is or if it is anything other than you need to know they're talking about Johnny to get Ben a little bit riled up.
Speaker: Yeah. um Okay. Then ah we go to Reed. He's got his stubble, so you know he hasn't been sleeping. And he's looking at a screen that has all these like different threats of an invasion from the Negative Zone, and an invasion from the Universal Inhumans, Franklin's powers, a celestial invasion, ah Galactus destroying Earth.
Speaker: And then it says, Reformation of the Council, Necessary. And then Nathaniel Richards shows up. Yeah, man.
Speaker: And he just says, hello, son, I'm home. which is the only And Reed says, my God, and that's the only dialogue in the whole story. Yeah. Then we get a second story, which is actually, we we skipped over it.
Speaker: Well, I said that there was the one page, and if we would come back to it. There's the day 14. Yeah. which we just see Spider-Man landing on the roof of the Baxter building. And then we get ah from Hickman and Mark Brooks, ah we get a story where Spider-Man, you know, Johnny's best friend.
Speaker: yeah to you know Spidey is Johnny's best friend. Johnny is not Spidey's best friend. Very much like you and me. and No. Um, but ah to also Franklin absolutely loves Spider-Man. That's been well established.
Speaker: And so Spider-Man shows up and he's like, Hey, can we hang out for a little bit? And Franklin's like, yeah. And Franklin's like, uncle Johnny died. And Spider-Man's like, says, yeah, I know. I'm sorry. Um, how are you doing?
Speaker: And Franklin says he keeps having bad thoughts. And Spider-Man's like, man, you to talk about dead uncles? Boy! Yeah. He's like, hey, let's go let's go clear our heads. Let's go let's go have a hot dog.
Speaker: And Franklin's like, I'm not hungry. And Spider-Man goes, well, I'm getting two hot dogs. and And I'm not going to eat a hot dog unless you eat a hot dog. And so Franklin goes, okay.
Speaker: But he makes Franklin pay for it. Yeah.
Speaker: Classic Peter. Classic Peter. Fucking hilarious. ah I think Hickman should do a Spider-Man run at some point. This this has convinced me. um For a guy who you don't think about being like... like i mean, he kind of did do a run on Spider-Man.
Speaker: Kind of. He did all do Spider-Man, but like yeah, for a guy who you don't think of as necessarily being like... I don't know. I wouldn't think of Hickman as being a funny guy, but man, he writes some great gags. Well, just just Spider-Man like standing at the hot dog cart and saying, can I borrow a dollar is really funny. To a child! To a child.
Speaker: um And you know, he's like he's rich. Yeah. They sit and eat hot dogs, and Franklin is just like hanging from the bottom of a gargoyle like on webbing.
Speaker: And I know it's safe, but it looks so unsafe. Oh, Matt, that's... Matt, you've gotten old. I must have. I must have gotten old. um But ah Peter tells Franklin about how Uncle Ben died.
Speaker: And how it yeah was definitely – like, Franklin's like, I kind of feel like Uncle Johnny's death is my fault. and like I think I could have stopped him from dying. and And Peter's like, I know I could have stopped Uncle Ben from dying.
Speaker: And he basically tells Franklin his origin story. Yeah, because Franken's like, well, why didn't you? And Peter's like, don't know, man, was dumb. I was a little piece of shit. I had to learn my lesson. shit You know, I was trying to make i was trying to make money from big time wrestling.
Speaker: Yeah. And that guy was like, don't see the problem where that's my problem. yeah with I don't see the part where that's my problem.
Speaker: They finish their hot dogs, and as Spidey is helping Franklin out of the webbing, and they're starting to you know web away... ah Franklin says, what was your uncle's name?
Speaker: And there's just a ah final panel of Spider-Man saying his name was Ben. And then Uncle Ben and Johnny are like there in the background. And then the next panel that's not in this story, but if it had gone on one more page, there should have been a panel where a friend goes, oh shit, I have an Uncle Ben. Is he going to die too? You mean you mean like my Uncle Ben? Yeah. Yeah.
Speaker: i Wait, are we brothers? gene I love that last little... That last little ah that last page, but like especially that last little image.
Speaker: I think that is really good. um And showing the similarities. like Spider-Man like helping Franklin by showing how he's gone through a similar thing. um like Again, like Hickman I don't think gets a lot of...
Speaker: isn't talked about much as a writer of particularly emotional stories. But this is like really good. Yeah, it's good. It's good stuff.
Speaker: Like, and it's Spider-Man being like, so fucking Spider-Man. Down to borrowing a dollar from a child that, man, he's not getting that back.
Speaker: Sorry, Franklin, you ain't getting that back. When you, when you recreate the universe after secret wars, maybe Maybe put an extra dollar in Peter Parker's bank account. Yeah.
Speaker: Then, after that, there is not a page of Franklin saying, you mean like my Uncle Ben. There is a page of black text on a white background of Jonathan Hickman just saying, never this is the last issue of Fantastic Four, but FF number one is coming.
Speaker: So, that's where we'll be picking up. With FF number one.
Speaker: When Hickmania continues. At Hickmania 6. Which. God. i would I really got to look that one up.
Speaker: it's It's when the Ultimate Warrior won the title right? Is it? okay I think that was Wrestlemania 6. Yeah. yeah Yeah that was the that was the the the title versus title.
Speaker: Yeah. I really liked these issues. Good stuff. lot of good stuff. Namor, hilarious. this is the This is the first set of issues I feel like i unequivocally I'm like, those were really good.
Speaker: Yeah. Namor, hilarious. the The entire team in peril, really well done. Good action. the The Ben being human for a week stuff was really good.
Speaker: Steve Epting kicks ass. um you know i'm sure I'm sure you already knew that, but it cannot ever be stated enough. Steve Efton kicks ass. Also, super nice guy. Love Steve.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah, I feel like things are really finally starting to like congeal and work, which is funny because... Yeah, here in the last issue ah Fantastic Four...
Speaker: Yeah, I mean, there's never been another issue of Fantastic Four since. Yeah. Right? So I guess what what' we going talk about next time? ah Avengers? Well, we're going to talk about FF numbers 1 through 5. Oh, right, right, right, remember right. all right Them kids are trying to kill Annihilus.
Speaker: They sure are. And what's Doctor Doom going to do? We'll find out. He's going to get a little white costume. that's He sure is. Dr. Doom's going to get baptized. Thanks for listening, everybody. We'll be back next week with another episode. In the meantime, if you want to email us, you can do it at our email address, which is warrocketpodcasts at gmail.com.
Speaker: ah You can also hit us up on Tumblr, warrocketpodcast.tumblr.com. We're on blues sky warrocket ajax dot com on Blue Sky, Sky. You can also get in touch with us on our Patreon, patreon.com slash warrocketajax. And on any of those places I just mentioned, you can ask for an invitation to our Discord, a cool, fun community of War Rocket Ajax listeners. A cool community of War Rocket Ajax listeners who really got together to buy Matt a Sword.
Speaker: this this is this this this ah to give $60 to the Trevor Project. If you want to join over there, you have to be invited, but you can ask us nicely for an invitation and we will get you one.
Speaker: Our website is warrocketajax.com. It has every episode of the show that we've ever done. Warrocketwiki.com is the fan run repository of all the information you could want to know about this show. Warrocket Ajax.
Speaker: If you want to find me and my stuff, go to mattdwilson.net to find links to my comics, my books, my other podcasts, and my social medias. Chris, where people where can people find you? Everybody can find me at the-isb.com. That is my website.
Speaker: And it has links to all kinds of stuff out there.
Speaker: See you next week, everybody. See you next week, everybody. Until then, folks, do not forget that Black Lives Matter. Trans rights are human rights. As are abortion rights. Drag is not a crime.
Speaker: And cops aren't your friends. Fuck ice. Free Palestine. We love you. We love you. Yeah! Peace everybody. Stand for everybody.
