Transcript
Speaker: Hello and welcome to Kalerinden, the Ireland Chronicles.
Speaker: Kalerinden is an actual play Dungeons & Dragons podcast in which we will actually play Dungeons & Dragons as a podcast. My name is David Case LeClaire and I will be the narrator and game master for these sessions.
Speaker: Clarendon is a world of magic and adventure, a world of rambling roads, twisty trails, and allegorical avenues. I refuse to explain that one.
Speaker: It is a world perpetually beset by the forces of chaos, but every time the darkness returns, epic heroes rise to save the realm. But our story is not about the Epic Heroes, at least not directly.
Speaker: Our story is about three novice adventurers that have recently agreed to carry the Epic Heroes baggage. And joining me as the Hardy Hirelings, we have Beth Gleason as... Lilia Thomas.
Speaker: And my best feature is my hands, because I can heal, I can defend my friends, I can birth babies, I can make a cabinet, and I can kill people all with my hands.
Speaker: and All of those things I guarantee will happen in this episode. Excellent. And Drew Gleason as... Darwinius Gorf Nozzlesnot. Snot Mother Gorf always say... ah She said Darwinius have great nose.
Speaker: Straight and true like Arrow. Okay. did Did she lie to you about other things too? Or... Snot does not like narrator guy. And Dave Sturgis as...
Speaker: I am playing Fredegar, the Furbog fellow from the farms. And i guess freds Fred's pretty fond of his his hair. I almost said beard, but it's kind of just one big undifferentiated furry mass.
Speaker: But I suppose in a close second is his strength, which thankfully he was raised to think of as a thing that he could use to help people and do kind things. And not just smash people flat with tables, although that that seems to be kind of a theme this point.
Speaker: All right. Well, if anyone gets smashed at the table, you'll find out about it here. Oh, suspense.
Speaker: In our last episode, the hardy hirelings were trying to escape with the lost caravan from a bandit encampment in the woods north of the Fort of Farn. After blowing up a barn full of fey dust, the area shifts in unpredictably magical ways as they battle with the despicable Carnivacius Despicchio and two hobgoblins in suspiciously expensive parkas.
Speaker: When we left the battle, Lily and Fred were in front of the caravan battling Carnivacius and a hobgoblin surrounded by terrifying guardian wraiths. Another hobgoblin was about 20 feet away, peacefully slumbering.
Speaker: Meanwhile, Snot is about 20 feet behind the caravan in an area of partially constructed buildings. And the entire area is affected by a fey aura that has turned everyone's skin to bark.
Speaker: Okay, Snot, it is your turn. Wow. Well, that's not going to what had in mind here, but but now I've moved away from the cart. Is there anything I can take cover behind near me?
Speaker: um Well, you're kind of a construction area, so you could say there'd be some like low walls that are partially constructed and you could get half cover. It's not as small, so we'll say that what would be half cover for anyone else is three quarters cover for him, so you could hide behind him.
Speaker: Okay, Snot is going to use his bonus action to dive behind the wall and attempt to hide, which I guess is a stealth check? A stealth check, and it's going to 15.
Speaker: Natural 20. Okay. Not what I would have liked that roll for, but okay. So he is going to duck behind something... And then he is actually going to poke back out and hurl one of his pebbles at the hobgoblin with the magical effect.
Speaker: Okay. And he has advantage because he's attacking himself, I believe. Yes. Okay. Well, that was a three. That was a second three.
Speaker: Okay. Well, you know, it was a good idea. Just hurls a stone past the hobgoblin. Not even close. Yeah. the yeah The stone is like telling you about its grandkids and how it's really looking forward so that you can meet them and you know catch up. And he's like, hey, do you want to come to my cookout? And then you're like, whoosh, just huck the thing through the air.
Speaker: Pings off the piece of bark on the the side of the hobgobble's face. He doesn't even notice. Ah, hated that guy. You two do better.
Speaker: Snot is going to stay where he is because he has at least a possible hidey space. And that is unfortunately all that he can do. Okay, Fred, it's your go.
Speaker: All right.
Speaker: Fred wants to hit so many people. Okay, I think it's two people in this group, but um I think because he saw the nasty ghosty things waver when he hit the hobgoblin, he is going to take that as a sign that he should maybe hit the hobgoblin again.
Speaker: Okay. Because he is beginning his turn. Lily, did you take any damage? Yes, I did.
Speaker: Lily, you gain four temporary hit points. It seems like some of Fred's iridescent leaves and stuff are growing on you too, but not in a bad way. Anyway, Fred is going to hit this with the table.
Speaker: Fantastic change in town there. It's going to be a 17 because of bark skin. Well, it's going to try to hit this guy with table. 19. All right. I'll roll roll again for advantage just in case. 17 plus six is still not a natural 20, but it's pretty good. Okay. Roll damage.
Speaker: All right, that is... 4 plus 6 is 10 table damage. You've hit the Hobgoblin again. Again, the spirits waver.
Speaker: He succeeds. So the spirits waver, but they keep going. The Hobgoblin is looking really bad. There's blood flowing down from his face where he's been repeatedly table hit. And the blood is dripping, staining the nice parka.
Speaker: But it is waterproof, so it's rolling down on it. Ah, that's a nice parka. Yeah, he's looking real bad. Is this the end of your turn, Fred? Yes. Okay, make a wisdom save.
Speaker: Fred the Wise, they call him. 13. That succeeds, so you take five necrotic damage from the wraiths. Uh, it still kind of sucks, though.
Speaker: Doesn't feel much like success, does it?
Speaker: They're tearing at you again, and trying to stay away from your tables. Okay, it is the Hobgoblin Priest's turn. is stumbling a little, his face all bloody, and is going to cast Healing Word on himself.
Speaker: He looks like ah he recovers some hit points. He whispers a word in Hobgoblin-ish, not a language. His hands glow with the dark energy.
Speaker: and vitality flows through him. The wounds start to visibly close. He still looks really bad.
Speaker: And now it is Carnivacius Despicchio's turn. Carnivacius turns from Fred towards Lily as she has stabbed him. says, as you have stabbed me, so I will stab you, even though my hands are weird and woody.
Speaker: appreciate the color commentary from Carnivacius.
Speaker: This is me is stabbing you. Kind of sounds like he's and inventing Sweet Caroline. 15 for his first attack. I think that fails. That fails. I'm 18. Right.
Speaker: And then his second attack is no longer sapped. Yep. He got a 17. That's a miss. So he slashes out with his rapier, but moving awkwardly because of where he had been slashed by your longsword.
Speaker: His first stab misses his second stab. Does like faint? little moves with his blade like he's doing some sort of fencing tournament. Then tries to stab you again, but you slide your shield in front of it and deflect his blow.
Speaker: Says, ah, you think you have defeated me. But we're still fighting, so I don't know.
Speaker: Okay, it's Lily's turn. Okay. Okay. I want do some things, but I'm not sure the economy of action, so we'll just try.
Speaker: First, I want to attempt to hit with my longsword, so it's 17. Is that right? Yes.
Speaker: I rolled a 17 plus 4. And this is against Carnivastius. Despeakio. Carnivastius, yes. Despeakio. He told me I can call him Carnivastius.
Speaker: That's true, he did. Yeah, he hasn't rescinded that yet. Yes, you've stuck him. Alright, so we sap him. We roll for regular damage, which 8 plus 2, 10.
Speaker: And then want to smite him with Divine 7. And then... i want to smite him with divine smite
Speaker: I want to use my channel divinity, which gives me advantage on attack rolls against the creature for one minute. I should have used that first. It's a vow of...animity.
Speaker: When you take the attack action, you expend one use of channel divinity to utter the vow. So, what that means is that you would have used that when you attacked. Okay. So, roll another attack roll to make sure you didn't get a 20.
Speaker: No, I rolled a two. Okay. So the Val of Amity is now in effect in addition to the Hunter's Mark, which is making him glow with the Mark of Halea. But you'll now advantage on him for the next minute.
Speaker: And is that the end of your turn? He has disadvantage for his next turn. For his next attack. Next attack. And he's taken it yes and all that damage a huge amount of damage. You've done 17 to him in this round.
Speaker: And he'd already taken nine from you. So he is very badly wounded. Make a wisdom save.
Speaker: Fourteen. Okay. So you take six points of necrotic damage as you save against the wraiths. You're trying to move them away from you as they're so tearing at you with their claws.
Speaker: All right. Now I'm done. Okay. Okay.
Speaker: And the other, uh, the hobgold is just a hobgold, hobgoblin, still lying back about 20 feet away. Just snoring, uh, snoring away.
Speaker: And that brings us to the beginning of the round. I'm going to roll a Oh boy. Six.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: As the round ends, the bark from your skin, from everybody's skin, just sort of flakes away in kind of a creepy way and falls to the ground. Yeah, that's grody. And the air around you all turns to water.
Speaker: It's like you're suddenly floating. Like, so we have to hold our breath and such? Yes. Not for very long. Presumably. When you are underwater, you have impeded weapons. When making a melee attack with a weapon, you have disadvantage unless it's piercing damage.
Speaker: Ranged attack rolls automatically miss beyond the weapon's normal range and have disadvantage against a target in normal range. And anything underwater has resistance to fire damage.
Speaker: Yeah. Is that going to wake the prop goblin up? Well, technically he has not taken any damage, but I think that suddenly being submerged in water would wake somebody up.
Speaker: Okay. And it's a ways back from the other two at this point, right? 20 feet back from them, so 45 feet from you. All right, so throwing rocks under these circumstances, are that's not going to work. And also, what a terrifying situation. Like...
Speaker: With a quick glance, can I tell if there's a water surface above me? No. assume my the instinct would be get out of the water. You can't see a surface above you. It just looks like all of the air has turned to water.
Speaker: Does this mean we can't speak, possibly? i think you can speak, but you would lose your the air that you were holding in. So be okay, but if if this kept going for more than one round, you might be in trouble.
Speaker: Yeah. I have any spells that wouldn't require me to speak.
Speaker: You could speak for the purpose of spells, but again, if you go more than one round. All right. I think my inclination is to swim upwards and then if it goes away, I'll just fall.
Speaker: Can I roll insight or something to figure out if this looks like might be a passing effect? Sure. 19. Do you remember all the purple stuff that exploded when we exploded the barn? Oh, yeah. No, I mean, I know what the cause of it is, but... You saw that just a minute ago you were covered in bark and it went away very quickly.
Speaker: Yeah. Yeah. So I think you have a pretty good insight that some things are shifting and moving and changing and this likely changed too. Okay. Then i am going to ease a bonus action to cast Healing Word on Lilia. Okay.
Speaker: I think Fred is looking a little worse than Lilia, just FYI. Yeah. Okay. If it's that apparent, then yeah, sure. Okay, oh, two four, so... I guess we have bloodied in 5.5, right? Yeah.
Speaker: yeah Fred it is bloodied. Okay, turnip guy definitely needs some help. 12 points of healing to turnip guy. And I guess I'm just going to use my action to get hidden again. Okay.
Speaker: So, no, did not do a good job of it. Under the circumstances, it seems to make sense, because I rolled a ten. Okay. So you've tried to swim your way back down behind the cover, but panicking and not really yeah getting down there.
Speaker: Okay, Fred, it is your turn. All right. Fred's turn is starting. So, Lily, you get nine temporary hit points.
Speaker: If you had any hit points temporary hit points left, this would replace the ones you had previously. Holy guacamole. Sure. Thank you. Yeah. I've been burning through them. So Lily is probably seeing what you're pretty sure are turn like yellow turnip flowers in your hair. Turnip flowers.
Speaker: And Fred is not a philosophical man, and he is not sure why he's underwater, but he, as we've established, really wants to hit this guy with the table, so he is going to recklessly attack him.
Speaker: Yeah, but it will not have actual advantage. Right, but I'm hoping it'll maybe cancel out the disadvantage of being underwater? That's correct. Okay. It's just a straight roll. Yeah.
Speaker: That is 12 plus 6 is 18. Yes, you have struck him with table. Fred makes a kind of burbly water noise.
Speaker: And that is 8 points of damage. He is looking super bad. Concentration check. Succeed. You're like in the water. You're just... He sees it coming.
Speaker: He's like, his eyes grow wide. like It's just... but There's this wave of water. Stream of bubbles. There's like a shockwave. It's spinning around a little bit.
Speaker: Is that the end of your turn? i Yes. Okay, wisdom save. Wisdom save. Worldwise here, how are you? That's a five.
Speaker: Okay, 16 necrotic damage. Fred is bloodied again. The wraiths are unbothered by the water. They're just tearing at you. Okay, it is now the priest's turn.
Speaker: He's managed to get his feet back beneath him, and he is desperate to make Fred not hit him with the table again.
Speaker: Not the table. Gonna have to agree to disagree on that one. Yeah. He's going to cast his flame ability. Oh, wait. Yeah, yeah. No, I said it.
Speaker: He's casting it. Do it. Do it. 13. What is your AC? With table, it is 16. That misses. He does have multi-attack.
Speaker: That's going to miss, too. 4. Yeah, he's trying to summon some kind of fiery thing to hit you, but the streaks of flame just go past you in the water. It's kind of nice heated hot tub sensation.
Speaker: Yeah. Okay, Carnivacius is sneering and striking at Lily, but he is sapped. He rolled 20 and 19. Well, the 19 hits.
Speaker: well the nineteen hit Yes, but he did so he does not get the crit, but he does get the hit. And he rolls badly. He hits you for five with the rapier.
Speaker: And he's saying something, but the words are muffled by the water. he blew in sharp Oh no, his one-liner is ruined.
Speaker: And he swings again for 16, which misses. He is not able to strike you with his second attack.
Speaker: Lily's turn. Okay. So this is not an advantage, but it's just regular. Because I have the vow. Vow of enmity gives it regular attack instead of disadvantage, yes.
Speaker: Come on, dice. One. Yeah. So busy trying to figure out what his quip was that you're not focusing as much on your attack.
Speaker: And also being underwater is a pretty new sensation. So he ducks back as your blade cuts past his throat. Feel yourself turning slightly in the water and you're like, oh.
Speaker: Oh, wow. The hobgoblin who is sleeping, his lungs are filling with water. He starts coughing. He's now awake, so he'll be able to move next round. All right, top of the round, I'm rolling the fey die.
Speaker: shit. Is it six again? Oh, boy. Six again. Oh, this is bad. This is bad for everybody. David is second-guessing his challenge. Some people may have been counting on the water ending, but it does not end.
Speaker: It's not. It is your turn. So we're, at this point, conserving our air, right? We're like... Well, since you you used your air to... Speak for yourself, pal.
Speaker: You cast Healing Word, so you are technically running out of breath now. ah You don't take any damage. You can go for number of rounds equal to Constitution modifier. What is your con mod?
Speaker: ah It's actually two. Okay, great. So you can go for three rounds before you will be choking. Yeah, but I mean, freaky situation. Also, does that mean that I am out of air to cast anything further?
Speaker: I'm going to say yes. Okay. Any verbal components. Okay. You still have the magic stones, which you could just puck, but it would be a disadvantage. Yeah. all right, can I try my trick to hide again before I do that?
Speaker: Yeah. Roll your stealth check. Need 15. Nope. Okay. I am going to make an attack on... Well, since I didn't hit the Hobgobble last time, I'm going to go for Carnivage.
Speaker: Okay. Despicable. Yeah, so lower of two.
Speaker: Fourteen. It's not going hit, is it? Okay, that hits. Roll damage. Okay. Getting back into it. So that does one D6 plus four and I am going to use Fury of the Small to add another two to that.
Speaker: And I rolled two so that is eight damage. Still pretty good. You hawk your stone. It's like, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Speaker: All right. I forgot that stone is still chattering. Lovely. Yeah. Yeah. It almost feels like slow motion, but still it strikes carnivorous, like on the temple as he's trying to mock Lily for having missed him.
Speaker: Okay, Fred's turn. All right. Lily, if you were below seven temporary hit points, you are now at seven temporary hit points. Awesome. I like this. This is pretty cool. Yeah.
Speaker: There's some iridescent ivy growing alongside the turnip flowers in your hair. It's getting a little weird. Floating gently in the water. Meanwhile,
Speaker: oh, this poor guy. i mean, don't feel that bad for him. Fred is going to continue to recklessly... not doing a great job of holding his breath, either. Recklessly attack this guy underwater with table.
Speaker: Okay.
Speaker: If that doesn't count as being enraged, I don't know what is. That's 16. That hits. Nice. All right. Okay.
Speaker: And that is 10 points of table. Fantastic. You have table crushed this guy. You just feel his body cracking and crumbling beneath the assault of your waterlogged table as you just swing right through him.
Speaker: The wraiths disperse in a puff of dark magic as he crumples, floating in the water, dead. He's dead. ah Fred whips his head around to look at the remaining opponent, and I guess that other hobgoblin that might be waking up soon.
Speaker: He's saying something angrily. He's not really carrying very well through the water. you can't tell that he's he's referring to the man as Mr. Radicchio, but okay. Mr. Radacchio. Mr. Profiterole.
Speaker: You're ridiculous. You're ridiculous. but All right, so the Spirit Guardians are dispersed. Carnivastius sees what Fred just did, looking at him. And in the water, he turns, uses cunning action to disengage, and he is trying to move as rapidly as possible through the water away from you guys.
Speaker: So he's going to move 30 feet. He's swimming past the goblin who's just choking there. heck of a way to wake up. The goblin's like, what? But Carnivastius just swims past and shrugs.
Speaker: And it is now Lily's turn. Can I toll the dead on this guy? With Caravacius? Yeah. Yes, Mr. Ridiccio. Now that's a saving throw, right?
Speaker: It is a saving throw. 16. Ah, that saves. So as he's fleeing, you throw out your hand.
Speaker: The black, smoky flames of Halea fly out towards him, but he dives down in the water, and it goes streaking past him. So he's now 30 feet away from you.
Speaker: ah Did you have anything else, Lily? As a bonus action, I'd like to lay on hands on Fred. Okay. So how much are you healing? $15. $15. fifteen Your hands glow with the golden hues of Halea.
Speaker: Fred is healed for 15. And somewhere you hear the far off cry of a sea eagle. Would you like to move? No, no movement. Okay.
Speaker: And we roll the fey die again.
Speaker: water suddenly disperses around you and some of you may like fall ah to the ground. Might throw up a little bit of water. And your weapons all turn into flowers.
Speaker: Pudding table is like a giant bouquet of roses. A few turnips mixed in. Nice. Lily, your sword is now a big sunflower.
Speaker: And it's not your stones. The one you have left is turned into a little dandelion head. Oh, oh, it's not affecting stick. It's affecting my stone. Wow. Okay. That's not going to be very helpful then, is it?
Speaker: Like an artichoke or something? Yeah. Okay, Snod, it is your turn. So there's a hobgoblin that is still prone out there about 45 feet away from you, 20 feet from Lily and Fred.
Speaker: And Carnivastius is another 10 feet past that hobgoblin, running away. So he's still pretty. Yeah, he's still pretty. He's not that far away. 55 feet from you. 55 feet.
Speaker: But I no longer have a stone what to huck. I don't know that this really calls for goblin rage.
Speaker: Okay. Snot is going to tug on his ear and whisper some familiar goblin words and cause roots to spring up under Mr. Carnivaggio, which has a 20-foot area.
Speaker: Is it possible to reach the hop goblin as well with that? Yeah, they're 10 feet apart. Okay, that's what I'm going to do. Yeah.
Speaker: Try and entangle both of them so he cannot run away. Strength save. It is a strength save of 14. Carnivacius fails.
Speaker: Hobgoblin succeeds. Okay. He looks pretty tough. The hobgoblin is just ripping the vines out as they wrap around him and looks like he's about ready to get to his feet. Carnivacius, however, running away from you is caught by the vines and i can't move.
Speaker: Haha! Get him! Thot is going to run the 20 feet back up to the wagon, hop on the back, and Grant's up and down, punching his fists into the air.
Speaker: Brett, it is your go. All right.
Speaker: Lily, if you have less than six temporary hit points, you've got six now.
Speaker: Fred is going to turn to Lily as if to say something, cough up a lot of water, and then, having recovered a little, say, oh, thank you very much, Miss Lily.
Speaker: You're welcome.
Speaker: And then gather up his bouquet of flowers and begin staggering off after Profitirol over there. ah Yeah, he's 30 feet away from you, so you could get to him if you want.
Speaker: Isn't there a hobgoblin in between? Yes. Okay. He's lying on the ground. I don't think he gets opportunity attack if he's prone. Okay. If he's on the ground, I think Fred might just run right past him after okay our mutual friend.
Speaker: So you caught up to Carnivarius? Did i have to dash to do that? No. Oh. He is restrained. Oh. By vines. But you'll you'll be restrained if you go in there. Yeah.
Speaker: Fred's going in there. Okay. Make a strength day.
Speaker: And wow, I rolled a three, which is a nine altogether. No, but you have advantage because it's strength, right? Oh, I do have advantage. right, not underwater anymore.
Speaker: right, that's a 15. That succeeds. You're just running past them, staggering a little bit, but angry and just ripping vines out as you go. They're like trailing off of you now.
Speaker: In addition to the leaves and turnips growing in your beard, you have green vines hanging off of you. So you've reached kind of ashes. What would you like to do? Mr. Radicchio.
Speaker: Fred is brandishing the table at him. Or, sorry, brandishing the bouquet of flowers at him. Ah, these are not for you. And then Fred does not hit him with the bouquet of flowers, because that seems silly.
Speaker: So he's just going to be, I guess, intimidating? As intimidating as a man with a bouquet, who's covered in other kinds of plants can be. You could grapple him. Yeah, or unarmed attack, yeah. Um...
Speaker: I think Fred is going to hesitate, keeping all the weird shit going on. Okay. Okay. Like, he's basically about to take a swing, and then he's like, wait a minute, this isn't a table anymore. Okay.
Speaker: We've all been there. You know how it is. and do you have anything else? I did want to spend the bonus action to maintain my rage, but otherwise. Okay.
Speaker: It Curnavashius' turn. He turns and then he's realizing that he's holding ah an iris and he's like, ah, Fred, da I'm so glad we could have this this chance to catch up.
Speaker: So do you want to help me escape from these vines? Fred narrows his eyes. He's making a persuasion check.
Speaker: Ten. I don't think that's too persuasive.
Speaker: Yeah, Fred's not exactly swayed by that. No, no. I think, uh, I think you can just stay right there. Okay. And then, uh, Lily. Okay.
Speaker: So he's 30 feet away. Tell me again what's the disadvantage failing my strength save and getting entangled? You're restrained. Ah.
Speaker: Let's try Toll the Dead again. Okay. I don't trust my strength save.
Speaker: It's a wisdom saving throw. He fails. Cool. Eleven. That's going to do it. Wow. Do you want to describe what it looks like when your Toll the Dead takes the life from Carnivarius Despotia? It feels good.
Speaker: it just Lily just snarls and holds her hand out and the black smoke just goes out like this arrow straight at his heart and just explodes in blackness and then he just crumples.
Speaker: Heroin of the story, ladies and gentlemen. Heroin of the story. She's a good person, people. She's a good person. Paladin, right here. But we'll find out if she's good person.
Speaker: All right. Does Lily have anything else she wants to do? No. All right. So the final combatant, the hobgoblin, standing up. He's just looking around in his pocket. He's just looking around. He's like, hey, I just work here.
Speaker: He's backing away from you guys. You're in a burning compound, let's set the stage, and the weird fey aura, the flames flicker behind you, and and most of the camp is on fire now.
Speaker: You hear more yelling and clashing of swords, and you hear, fall back, fall back. I'd like to get out of here. Snot is still jumping up and down and yelling, get him, get him, but he's not taking any action to do that. Okay. Okay.
Speaker: think Fred is going to try to pull Profiterole's body out of the vines and bring it back, toss it on the wagon. Okay. I can drop the vines, actually. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah. Okay. So we are out of initiative now. So you've got Cardavacius and you've dumped his body, his crumpled, drained body on the wagon. And you're going to resume your way out of here.
Speaker: Yep. So you're pulling the wagon back towards the entrance as you do. Foo comes rushing in, sees you guys, and he comes over. Without saying a word, he just gets next to Lily behind the wagon and starts shoving on it. Snot's still jumping up and down on top of it. Yes, but he switched to, full wagon, full wagon.
Speaker: Okay. With Foo, Lily pushing on it and Fred pulling you, you easily drag the wagon out back to the front entrance. Phineas is like, oh, ah see you later, Snot.
Speaker: I think we're probably ah going to lose our job. And okay. So you come back out onto the trail. Talonvor and the others come out. Rufelm and Meg are running through the woods next to you.
Speaker: And you pull away from the flames of the burning encampment behind you. You get a certain distance away. Talonvor's like, all right, all right. i think we're good.
Speaker: Nobody's following you. You still hear yells from the north. There's great heaps of smoke going into the sky. Wow. As you moved out of the compound, that fey aura faded. And as you look back behind you, flames.
Speaker: Fey aura is like settling down. And you've turned normal. But just before the aura fades, silhouetted against the flame, you see the dark image of a woman in robes cackling back at the camp.
Speaker: And... hear words that you don't know how they can read you because you're quite far away now. The return of the Fomor is not nigh. The free realms will not soon fall to the flower of Kel and the immortal Vale.
Speaker: And then the figure disappears.
Speaker: Okay. Those things are not going to happen. All right. Talonvor's like, um, all right. Did you guys hear that? Weird. Yeah.
Speaker: Topaz is like her blade is just covered in blood. She is kind of covered in blood. It doesn't seem like it's hers. think she has gleeful expression on her face and she is talking to Blue Streak. Talonvor is just kind of like, uh-huh, uh-huh.
Speaker: Sharnanan has returned to Sharnanan, they, them. Ah, okay. Their face is like a mask of ash. Their whole front half is covered in ash, and their hair is singed.
Speaker: The robes look slightly singed in the front. They just have a stunned expression on their face, stumbling around after everybody. Wow. And then topple over where everybody's standing.
Speaker: Snot is going to hop down off the wagon and go over. Are you okay? He's going to use his last spell slot to upcast Healing Word on them.
Speaker: Okay. So hard to pick up d4s. Ten points of healing if they are in fact hurt. Okay. Well, you see some moss growing on their body, but you're not you don't get the sense that they were actually physically injured.
Speaker: But Sharnanan seems to appreciate the gesture. They get up to one knee. They're reaching up. Snort. Snort. Snort. Reaching a hand out to you. Yeah, yeah, it's not.
Speaker: <unk> It's not going to take their hand and try to pull them to their feet and over to the wagon. Okay. Yeah, they they get up to their feet and then they like pluck a card out of your ear. Ah, Stephen of Clovers.
Speaker: It's not just going to drop their hand
Speaker: back off, looking very grouchy. Talonvor is looking at everybody's like, all right. We should get back to town quickly. Excellent work, Lily, Fred, Snot, Fu, Rufelm, Meg, Charinon, of course.
Speaker: You just blew that whole barn to... I mean, what did you put in that, Topaz? Anyway, might have been a little more powerful than was needed. But I think we've taken out their staging camp, struck a blow against them.
Speaker: Let's get back to Mud Puddle. You said he did. What? What did I say? You said Mud Puddle. Oh, well, yeah, of course. I mean, come on. Not that hard? Any idiot could get that right.
Speaker: Fred mumbles something under his breath. Snot is going to hop back up onto the wagon and start looking through, like, what is all this that we saved? There's a lot of stuff. Most of it has, like, names on it, like it's deliveries.
Speaker: You do find a box that's been opened. In it, there are two parkas, a small one and a medium-sized one. Oh, There's a case of wine in there. lot of other odds and ends, the type of things people might order from the Sears catalog.
Speaker: Can I try on the parka? Yeah, the small one fits you perfectly. Oh. Okay, over on top of Snot's existing. Yeah. And Snot's going to attempt to open the wine.
Speaker: Gosh, who ordered a fancy dead Italian man? Oh, yeah. You also find a carnivorous despicchio on top of the wagon, but you don't think it came with it. He's a special delivery. Recent edition.
Speaker: All right, so you pop to open one of the wine bottles and Talonvor's like, oh, come on, that's my, I ordered that, that's mine. At least share it. Okay. Zot's going to take a big swig and then go over to the edge of the edge of the cart and hand it to, well, whoever's closest.
Speaker: Talonvor takes it, he looks at it and like, it shrugs and takes a big swig and then passes it on. So you walk back to Mud Puddle, pleased but tired.
Speaker: You go back over the fort, of course, and then it's a good, maybe about an hour, half, two hours to get back to Mud Puddle. Oh my goodness. Everybody has fallen quiet by that point. You're just ready to be back. It is mid-afternoon.
Speaker: Is anybody going to object if Snot's riding on the cart? No. mean, I think with three people moving it. I mean, we can hook Swift Hoof to it. yeah Oh, yeah, I forgot about Swifthoof. Yeah.
Speaker: Yeah, let's get her. Swifthoof is perfectly happy for Fred to carry the wagon, actually. but She thinks it's his natural place. If we hooked up Swifthoof, it's not good to supervise. Oh, okay. All right.
Speaker: So you do eventually convince her that this is her job and not Fred's. Okay. But it takes a lot of, maybe about one-fifth of the food in Fred's pack. Oh, no. But there's quite a bit of food in the caravan boxes. Yeah. <unk> nots He's never been so tired.
Speaker: He's going to sniff around the packages and see if anything else smells worth opening. Yeah, you can find some sort of like crackers, like senbei crackers and a little packages. Okay. Yeah.
Speaker: So yes, Snot's going to open some other people's mail for food and then eventually just fall asleep in the back of the wagon. I think at some point somebody has picked up Sharnan on and put them on the wagon too, and they're just lying there sleeping too tired to even play tricks on Snot. I know, Snout was going to take them back to the wagon until they pulled the, well, anyway.
Speaker: but Uncalled for. As you return to Mud Puddle, the street grows quiet around you. The sounds of the town, which are pretty lively, have faded a bit, and the shadows grow.
Speaker: See an elven woman walking down the street towards you with an impossible grace. She has fawn-tinted skin, soft almond eyes, and long black hair. Seems to sparkle with the twinkling of stars in the pure night sky.
Speaker: She wears a simple gray dress and cloak and carries no weapons. She walks up to the group of you, the distant look in her eyes. She seems to be staring into the distance just over your shoulder.
Speaker: Her voice rings out, soft as the evening dew.
Speaker: Long have I traveled from the light of ancient suns to the voices that whisper in darkness. I have scoured the Athenaeum of Miracos, bared the heart of the Scathic,
Speaker: and beseeched the wisdom of the seer of Rhiannon's bower.
Speaker: Long have I sought, through dusty tome and cursed grimoire, for the forgotten lore of the fall of Kel.
Speaker: And I have found it.
Speaker: And with the arrival of Anne Fereniel, Maiden of Eternal Twilight, the gathering of heroes is complete. We bring this episode to a close.
Speaker: Wow. Snutt would have really liked to have been awake for that. I didn't want to ruin the moment, but I was tempted to describe Fred, who is like sopping wet, covered in hobgoblin blood, has fully reverted back to his dad bod form, now covered in dead flowers and stuff, being like, i need to take a shit.
Speaker: Please join us next time as we start our search for the relics of the fallen city on Caleranden, the Ireland Chronicles.
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