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Episode 38 - Ranking Every Adventure Game Ever
0 Playsin 6 hours
So. We had already decided we were going to spend the entire episode ranking Adventure Games – many of which, we've never played – but then, we decided to start out by talking about piss for 15 minutes.
Matt and Roses bring a bizarre, chaotic energy and a true EXPERTISE on Adventure Games to this ALL-RANKING episode! Plus, we talk about some games we've been playing and some newly released games!
Please don't give this one The Flush ™
TOILET DECALS COMING SOON (or not. idfk)
Email us [email protected]
PFLAG Resources: https://pflag.org/find-resources/
Trans Lifeline: 1-877-565-8860
LGBT National Hotline: 1-888-843-4564
Games Mentioned:
- Death of the Reprobate
- Chicken Police: Into the Hive
- Rise of the Golden Idol
- Mythargia
- The Abandoned Planet
- Another World
- Myst
- Blasphemous 2: Mea Culpa DLC
- Case of the Golden Idol
- Pajama Sam 2: Thunder and Lightning Aren't so Frightening
- We Were Here Forever
- Cosmonavtes: Escape Reality
- Voyage: Inspired by Jules Verne
- The Crystal Key
- Embracelet
- To The Moon
- Baker Street Breakout: A Sherlockian Escape Adventure
- Ankh: Heart of Osiris
- The Slaughter
- Mission: Critical
- The Pawn
- Five Magical Amulets
- James Peris: The Fountain of Eternal Drunkenness
- Lily Looking Through
- Limbo of the Lost
- Doctor DuMont's Wild P.A.R.T.I.
- Portal 2
Recommended
Transcript
Video Game Reviewer Culture
00:00:00
Speaker
So Matt, we have a little bit of a problem. You would call this ah you would call this a problem. I would, personally, in my personal experience. But like I noticed that you are not up to date on video game reviewer culture. TM.
00:00:22
Speaker
Yeah, like I don't know, I would say I don't know fucking anything. I wouldn't say I'm just not up to date. I would say I don't even know the origins of it. That's so wild to me. That's still wild to me. I mean, in terms of like YouTube, like in terms of like video producers, there's plenty of video game review magazines and websites I've followed my whole life. But like, and i I don't, I've never watched these like video game review What about me? I used to have a video game review show. Yes, I watched your shows, but way I watched you all your and adventure game reviews, but like way late, like maybe a year before we started this podcast. Wild. OK, so if I say like. Tell me if this means anything to you, the irate gamer. What? No.
00:01:14
Speaker
Nothing, okay. Spoonie. Okay, I just learned about Spoonie yesterday. This is not gaming, but Nostalgia Critic. These are all people in the same era that started things. I have heard of Nostalgia Critic by name I have never seen. And I think he's like a fedora wearing guy, but I know nothing about Nostalgia Critic. You know what? You're better off. But this is the, you're better off. This is the wild one though.
00:01:44
Speaker
Angry video game nerd. You've mentioned this, but that's only from me. Do you know this person? That's wild. How can that be? So like angry video game nerd portrayed by James Rolfe, probably one of the first, one of the earliest instances. That's how they treat it. Like, Oh, this is my character and I am embodying them. Yeah.
00:02:07
Speaker
Because his whole thing, like, his whole thing was like, he's a film person. Like he is, he likes horror, he likes making films and making characters. So he wanted to portray like an angry video game nerd, somebody that's just and complain ah complaining about video games. So those were some of the earliest reviews I watched. That's not where I took my style, obviously, but it at least made me feel like I could do it too. Like I could I could talk.
00:02:37
Speaker
about video games. You could be angry and talk about video games. No, I'm not an angry. I mean, y'all tell me you think I'm an angry reviewer. I'm a snarky reviewer. I'm I can be a little bitchy but and snarky, but I'm not angry. You say that like it's a category. You said that it's like capital A, capital.
00:02:56
Speaker
like angry reviewer. Yes, because honestly, it
Humorous Video Game Review Series
00:03:00
Speaker
kind of is at this point. There was a time, let me tell you Matt, there was a time. When all the reviewers were nice and happy and then the quickening came.
00:03:15
Speaker
No. So around like, I want to say between 2006 and 2008, there was the style of a very angry reviews happening and we, and everybody wanted to do it. Uh, everybody wanted to be that angry video game nerd. And I just didn't like, I'm just not but that angry like about it. Well, that's what I do. What do you do?
00:03:39
Speaker
Oh, well, in my new ah in my new video game review series that I do on YouTube. And you didn't tell me about that. And I do on Vimeo. Oh, OK. Well, that's OK. Maybe that's why I missed it. It's OK. Yeah, I actually I couldn't get into it. I couldn't get into YouTube. They said no. ah But I do it. I do it in Vimeo and I do it and I do it on actually they don't pay me, but I'm on Tubi.
Novelty Merchandise Ideas
00:04:10
Speaker
I have a series on 2B. Wow, Matt, you did not tell me that you had these credentials. I actually, I have to pay 2B to be be a to be yeah but i yeah i'm on But I'm on and Vimeo and what I do is i I talk about video games and I talk about how much they fucking suck. Wow, like i go so angry. Yeah, so like I'll get, I'll be like, I'll be like, oh ah ah Check I'll be like, oh yeah, Dragon's Dogma 2, what a piece of shit! And I'll be like, I'll be like, you know what, I have like my own catchphrase, too. oh Please, please, go out, please tell me. I'll be like, Black Myth Wukong? What is this piece of shit game? This is like ah if ah the guy from The Room tried to make, ah I don't know,
00:05:14
Speaker
Black Ops 2, I don't know these types of video games. But anyway, so then I do, what I do is I will, I'll be like, you know what I think about this game? And I say, I give it the flush. And then I hit like a button and it goes like a whoosh, like I get a whoosh.
00:05:30
Speaker
and they're like flush. Yeah, and so all my all my ah um my fans, they call themselves the Flushers, and then, so when like I'll be like, person so persona persona three reload, more like ah persona three load of pee, pee load, and then I'll be like, and like, ah like a load of pee, it's getting the flush, and then I hit the button, and it's like,
00:05:58
Speaker
so I will ah be uploading that sound effect in the near future to our Zencaster, because... I'll be like... Just to make you feel more at home. I'll be like, Star Wars Outlaws? More like... ah Star... Board... whoa that Matt... Paws... Give it to Flush! Give it to Flush! Do you have any merch?
00:06:25
Speaker
yeah yeah Yeah, we have a t-shirt. Well, okay, I have two types of merch. One is a decal that you can put on your toilet. Oh, good. yeah but It's specifically not for your car. It's actually a toilet. Oh no, it only sticks to porcelain. Wow. It only sticks to porcelain and it's water resistant and piss resistant. Incredible. So it's a toilet decal. Toilet decal that says, em dog, that's what I call myself, em dog. Em dog gives it the flush and then I have a t-shirt that says give it the flush and it has
00:07:04
Speaker
um a like a top-down picture of a toilet and it actually, it does does have bathroom in it. The picture of the toilet does have bathroom in it. You know what's real you know the best about this? It's like photo it's a photo of bathroom in a toilet.
00:07:26
Speaker
ah It's a photo of somebody went to the bathroom in a toilet. It sounds and inappropriate. It says give it the flush. It sounds inappropriate, but also you're not too far off from from angry video game nerd. You're just explaining an angry video game nerd sketch. ah All right. Well, ah you know what I say about this cold open. let's Yeah, what do you say? I give it the flush.
00:08:12
Speaker
Dude, this is a good idea. We should have save your game, toilet decals. There's like one listener to save your game in the house and everybody else is like, why does our toilet say save your game? And then you just, you yell, give it the flush. Give it the flush. Give it the flush. This doesn't answer my give it the, give it the flush. And then they run into their room and close the door and their mom is like, all right. I'm going to look into a water resistant porcelain Piss resistant too. It's got to be both. Piss resistant in case you pee on your toilet.
00:08:53
Speaker
You forget how it goes, you forget the order. like Sometimes you're like, what oh, is it is it cheese, then lettuce, then bread? No, it's bread, then mayonnaise, then bread, then cheese. No, it's like that, but with toilet. Is it yeah he said is it water, then piss, then toilet? No, it's piss, then toilet, then what? No. and then Then flush. Flush.
00:09:18
Speaker
i You know what, you tell me viewers, would you like toilet stickers? No, I'm an artist, I can make toilet stickers. Would you like us to invent the toilet decal? We're gonna go on Shark Tank and be like, so ah this is our, we need $200,000, we want 51% of the company, and here it is, and we bring out a toilet, like a real toilet, and it just has a single decal. Here's the fucking thing though, Roses. it's like Joe Rogan would buy a million of these and sell a million of these. Like if we invented the toilet decal, these like bro podcasts, like, okay, it starts out with us and we're being kind of ironic about it, right? But then these bro podcasters will be like, yeah, get your toilet decal. Let him know what you think. Let him know how you feel about
00:10:12
Speaker
ah women's rights You can't steal my idea. Well, actually, I guess it's your idea, huh? Well, what I'm saying is they're not going to steal our logo, but we will create the toilet decal and then we'll become bill billionaires right by licensing out the technology. You know what? I'm fine with it.
00:10:33
Speaker
I'm gonna create a better world with toilet decals. It'll be like, you know what you could
Recent Video Game Releases
00:10:40
Speaker
use them for. and you know how um I don't know if you know this. I like how you're coming up with uses for the toilet decals. wall no i know you you don't have a penis, so I've never experienced this, but maybe you've heard of the idea of ah decals, logos, huh spots in a urinal. Have you heard of this?
00:11:01
Speaker
I, uh, no. So sometimes you will go to a urinal and there'll be like a little like logo or a little like graphic in one specific spot of the urinal. And what it is, is it's designers have determined the spot at which, if the P hits that spot, it is going to splash out of the urinal the least. And so they put the little decal there because they know just instinctively men, well people with penises, we'll aim at it. Really? Yes, yes! And so it it like legitimately that's been studied legitimately reduces splashback.
00:11:47
Speaker
by just putting this thing in there and then just psychologically, us fucking eight-brained morons are like, I'm gonna pee on that! Yeah, that's a thing I'm gonna pee on! Yeah, I mean, people with penises just love to aim, I guess.
00:12:06
Speaker
It's kind of like how they like write their name in the snow. like It's just like there's a weird thing and it's like scientifically proven. I mean, if I had one, I'd be like, I could do art with this.
00:12:22
Speaker
The world is my canvas and this is my paintbrush. Yeah, this is my pay these are my tools. Oh my God, so anyway, guys, welcome to Save Your Game. I'm your host, Mal Camp. With me is ah the ah the innovative, soon to be billionaire pushing up roses. Hi, I'm making a toilet decal. Welcome to my podcast. Hope if you like it. um So roses, since This is a thing, we have to talk about it. Since the last episode, um there's been a lot of like big news. okay And we we can't not talk about it because what are we gonna, so okay. And since the last episode, um well, ah a couple big things, Death of the Reprobate was released.
00:13:16
Speaker
yep yep yep yep yep um Chicken Police Into the Hive was released. ah and um Rise of the Golden Idol. I know, and i was I didn't know that
Game Critiques and Controls
00:13:30
Speaker
until like an hour ago when you posted, and now I'm like so excited. And I know that's all you're thinking about, by the way. And nothing else happened. Yeah, that's the thing. Nothing else happened between the last episode and this episode. Those three pieces of news, that and that's what everybody on, not even just in the country and the world is talking about, and actually nothing else happened, weirdly.
00:13:53
Speaker
I know. We're all talking about like Rise of the Gold Nidal. How nice. And nobody's talking about anything else because nothing else happened. Yeah, nothing happened. So I'm fucking stoked.
00:14:05
Speaker
All three of those games were games that were like high on my. Excite. Oh, I know. i The only game that wasn't really on my like, oh, I got to play this is probably chicken, please. And the highest was it is right the gold title like I. Oh, my God, I didn't even know I I even know.
00:14:25
Speaker
I know, ah I just keep- Oh my God, let's play it right now. I know, as we're talking, I keep opening up Steam and like hovering over the play button and then minimizing Steam because we have to record a podcast. So I gotta give this one the flush, but just for now. Flush. So ah if you were a dev for Rise of the Golden Idol and you would like some toilet decal merch by me,
00:14:51
Speaker
I'm your girl. I'll do anything. Get a Rise of the Golden Idol toilet decal. This is so gonna happen. I need you to know that this is gonna happen. Maybe not for Rise of the Golden Idol.
00:15:05
Speaker
But you're going to see Pushing Up Roses toilet decals here, you mean? You have to give me at least like 1% of the profit. You'll get more than 1%. 1% is like nothing. Yeah, but like it's it's you'd be the one creating it. you'd be it's You're saying it would be branded Pushing Up Roses. But I just want like a tiny little bit for having made the joke.
00:15:28
Speaker
I made the joke first. I don't playque think I deserve more than 1% for making the stupidest joke on earth.
00:15:39
Speaker
um Okay, roses. yes What have you been playing this week? I, A, still trying to kick this cold, B, I edited Ghost Lake, but however, however, I did get a chance to try Mythargia, which is a game that you recommended to me. Yes. And it was, uh, it scared me, first of all, because I get, that's just how I get, that's just how it'd be. But I was like very pleasantly surprised to see how beautiful
00:16:12
Speaker
This game looked it was crisp. It's so pretty. It's such good pixel art. And it's it's animated. Well, um I I think I like the way the story is being told. There's there's a flashback element to it. It's it's very Shutter Island. If you guys have seen that movie, it's but but. And it's a big but. Yeah. It's the controls are How do I say it?
00:16:43
Speaker
Not good. um I'm sad to say that because the game itself, so much potential, but it's doing a thing where you're controlling of with WASD, which i a lot of games do that, especially computer games. I'm very used to that. But they're also cramming like a flashlight mechanic, a running mechanic. um For some reason, I can only run with my left shift and not my right shift. So you can imagine that you know my my hand is a little And so like I kept, this sucks. I love platforming games. I was falling into ditches and like running into bear traps. It is an adventure game. I would categorize it as such, but there is an action element. And I don't mind that, but only if the controls are working. And to me, I just couldn't
00:17:34
Speaker
ah it's so It's so frustrating and sad to say because if the controls were different, this would be so I would be like playing this yeah so much. I mean, when you add platforming to anything, I mean, ah yeah at fortunately or unfortunately, you make the ah smoothness of the controls um one of the most important, like it instantly makes it one of the most important parts of the game, right? um So there's there are games that have no good story, barely good graphics, and the only reason we like them is because of how good the controls are, right? That's a platforming game. and So the fact that this game adds jumping over traps and fending off enemies on a 2D plane, you've made it a platforming game. Your controls better be fucking good.
00:18:25
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. And i I would even what a good fix for this would be just let me choose the controls. But I don't think you can. I think I went into that. I tried to like set.
00:18:38
Speaker
you know like the other shift button for her run and it's not it's not letting me so um or even better I do since I'm a computer gamer because we're the best and computer games are the best uh since I fall into that category I very much grew up on keyboard plus mouse mechanic and it were I think it works very well together But it doesn't the game doesn't really implement that. But that being said, this is the exact type of game I like. It's the vibe. It's the spooky vibe. It's the adventure game element. It looks beautiful. I just I wish I would stop jumping into bear into bear traps. You know, do you think even with the bad controls, right? If you had save slots. That you would care as much.
00:19:32
Speaker
Uh, no, uh, no, that would help. Honestly, if I had save slots and that would at least give me some hope and not be as frustrating. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I think, I think at this time, at this point in adventure games, there's no reason to not have a lot of save slots.
00:19:52
Speaker
Unless, you know, I think some people, it's like, that's the thing they're going for. But if that's what Mythargia was going for, I just, then i don't understand yeah what I don't understand what their point was, right? Like if they felt like it was integral to their game to not have slave slots, to have like one autosave, then I don't get what they experience they thought they were giving people.
00:20:16
Speaker
Yeah. And like it is, it is a positively reviewed game. Uh, it does. It's just those UI problems that I think are holding it back, but I will say this. I was pleasantly surprised at how much I liked it and thought it was it gorgeous. Really beautiful.
00:20:36
Speaker
Yeah, I loved it, and I think it's there. They did a VR hockey game before that, so I'm really interested to see if this team, their name is Run by Coffee. I'm interested to see if this team makes more shit in the future. That'd be great, because clearly they have a grasp. Right, and the ideas in this game were so smart, and like you said, the art was so beautiful that I am I would love to see more games like this. Me too, me too. ah Thank you for the rec and thank you for the gift. That was a gift, a steam gift.
00:21:18
Speaker
from Matt, because you know what? I think we know each other's tastes. I trust you. I trust you to buy me ah a video game. I don't do that with everyone, because some people are like, here, play Minecraft. I'm like, that's not, no. That's not anything. So many times I play games, and I'm like, I got to tell roses about this, but this was the one that I was like, the one yeah i she's getting this game right now.
00:21:42
Speaker
well you You could probably tell that the vibe was there. Yes. I didn't know if you had that vibe. And I think I said that to you. It's like, I don't know if you'll love the gameplay, but you will love the art. You will love this. Like like you're saying, the vibe is you up and down. Yeah. I'm i'm a i'm a i'm a vibe person.
Art Pricing and Indie Challenges
00:22:01
Speaker
I work on vibes only. Good vibes only. Sorry.
00:22:07
Speaker
Sorry, I'm putting that on my toilet decal. Good vibes only on the toilet decal. So that's Mythargia, huh? Yeah, yeah. So I did get, even though despite the chaotic week that I had, I did get a chance to check that out. And now, absolutely, I'm going to be playing Rise of the Golden Idol. Is that what you've been playing? Rise of the Golden? No, I have not played that yet. I finished. I did finish.
00:22:35
Speaker
um Death of the Reprobate, which we talked about last week, and it is absurd that ending, honest honestly, and listener, you just gotta play the ending to believe it. You're not gonna believe it until you do it. And if you are too excited, like if you don't care I'm not gonna tell you it, but if you are too excited and don't care about spoilers, you can end the game immediately.
00:23:01
Speaker
Like you can start the game and then go and then, cause you get set on a series of tasks and you can just go right back to the character who gives it to you and be like, I'm done. And they're like, really? And you're like, yup. And then they're like, Oh, okay. Well, you didn't do anything, but okay. So, and you can just end the game right away.
00:23:22
Speaker
fun. And the ending is just fucking wild. um And it is so divorced from the rest of the game that it ah I don't think ah I think it's almost like two separate things. It's wild. It's wild. And it keeps it almost like keeps its adorableness by at the end, they're like these little two dancing skeleton skeletons or as I like to call them, Skellingtons, and they're like playing little violins and violins and they're just like following you and like prancing. And I'm like, I even told the dev, I'm like that those skeletons were so cute, though. They're so cute.
00:24:06
Speaker
um The other thing I finished, I talked about this maybe like a month ago, I finished The Abandoned Planet. Oh yeah, I remember, yep, I remember. Which is another beautiful game, it's sort of like, ah it's kind of like a cross between, like it's kind of pixel art, but it's also very um Another World, if you've ever played that game. Yeah, yes I have, I'm very familiar with Another World.
00:24:30
Speaker
um So it's like it's like another world and kind of like pixel art and it's got a very, ah but you know, it's not it's not a platform game like other and another world. It is almost like a, it's kind of like a mist game. You're first person and you're going around this alien world trying to understand their technology to try and figure out how to get off the planet. And it ruled, like the ending was, the ending ah left,
00:24:57
Speaker
ah the story open for a sequel, which I think was really cool. nice And I loved the puzzles. There was a point where I got stuck and that's why I stopped playing it for a while. I got like too stuck. But when I came back to it and I understood what I had missed, I was stoked about it and oh great loved it. I loved it all the way through. And yeah.
00:25:23
Speaker
all I have to think about is Rise of the Golden Idol right now. I'm gonna be very honest with you. Even though I was very interested in Abandoned Planet when you ah first mentioned it. Yeah, I guess that was about a month ago, wasn't it? Yeah. And the last thing, I finished Blasphemous 2, the Mia Culpa DLC. Okay. So ah it's cool. I mean,
00:25:47
Speaker
It's just more Blasphemous 2. So if you liked Blasphemous 2, the Miokopa DLC is just more of the same. They just add to the map and they add to the enemies. And it's a little harder. And that's it. And then after this podcast, we're both gonna- Just Rise of the Golden Idol. Just rise, that's it. Just non-stop. I do wanna talk about Rise of the Golden Idol a little bit though. Okay, what would you like to say? Because have you seen their pay structure?
00:26:18
Speaker
They're what? No. I don't know how I feel about this. Okay. I know Case of the Golden Idol. The DLC was so generous, right? The DLC was, I mean, it wasn't, it didn't cost very much and it would be, it was like almost all told about the same size of the game.
00:26:40
Speaker
So I expect the same thing with Case of the Golden Idol, but you get it through this detective pass, which grants you access to ah it all future DLC. And I just don't, I don't know.
00:26:56
Speaker
I guess it makes sense. so it It does. It does make sense. It doesn't seem egregiously ah egregiously greedy to me or anything like that. um And it is the same price as the game. So you basically have to pay. So, you know, the game's like 18 bucks and then the detective pass is another 18 bucks. So.
00:27:19
Speaker
I guess if they're going to double the game in content, it makes sense. But that makes the game $35 or $36. And that's not a horrible price. So I'm just digesting it. I just i was surprised by that pay structure. And I'm still, I think, digesting.
00:27:36
Speaker
Yeah, it's tough and and I think that pricing art, any art, whether it's media and it's a product or yeah the type of art that I do, paintings and visual art, pricing art is very tough. We need to get paid for our art and we try and we try to be accessible. I try to be accessible with my prices whenever I can.
00:27:58
Speaker
But, you know, in the end, I want people to understand that yeah indie artists like myself and like Rise, we're not getting the same pay grade as like a AAA or in my, you know, in my category, like a fine artist, you know, yeah or even like even like a working artist. I am more of a commission. I'm not even a commission artist. ah
Capitalism and Creativity
00:28:20
Speaker
So it is it is tough to do that.
00:28:23
Speaker
I think what strikes me about it that bums me out though is it reminds me of this chapter. pay structure that you saw with Telltale or you saw with like the Dream Machine. This thing that everybody thought was going to be the future of adventure games, like you buy a whole season or you buy one chapter at a time. And it that failed so spectacular spectacularly because that's not how people wanted to buy games. But now I guess people do it with DLC. They buy DLC in season passes. so right
00:28:56
Speaker
Maybe, there maybe it's time for adventure. Maybe it's time for adventure games to try it again. And that's what rise of the golden idol is doing. Yeah. And I do think chapters like the telltale chapters, I do think they're different because like they would come out with like, like five, like eight, five to eight chapters. I'm like, what the fuck? It sounds like in this case, you are paying for a pass that gets you all DLC in the future. Okay. So, you know,
00:29:27
Speaker
what kind of what you're getting, but I understand money is tight for many, many people. Uh, so I understand being, you know, apprehensive about that. I try to be understanding when it comes to indie, any kind of indie artist and yeah and pricing. Cause I don't think like guys in my personal experience, indie artists, indie devs,
00:29:49
Speaker
We don't we don't want to scam you out of money. We love you. yeah We don't want to scam you. We just want to be able to keep creating. And so we have to make our money, too. um But yeah, yeah, I mean, and I know the other thing about Rise of the Golden Knight, all right, is they have that Netflix deal. They are a Netflix game. Cool. So.
00:30:14
Speaker
I imagine that is a trade-off too. sure yeah I imagine that that is a lot of money maybe up top. yeah um And then now everybody who has Netflix basically has your game for kind of free. And maybe that really cuts into profits and makes this sort of thing necessary. I don't know. I know video game pricing is in a real crisis.
00:30:41
Speaker
yeah ah recently and funding good video games is hard. So maybe this is just an attempt and I just don't, I don't know. I don't know how I feel about this type of attempt, but I'm not, I don't, I don't, I'm not negative. I'm not feeling, I'm not feeling strongly enough to say that I have that I don't like it or that I feel negatively about it. I just was taken aback and I'm going to be watching it with curiosity.
00:31:15
Speaker
Yeah, you know what's really interesting to me is having been online for a while and being a creative and being public with like my pricing and for for art and all that, I get told more than anything else, don't and don't undersell yourself. You've got to make your money. You're an artist. You've got to make your money. Don't do anything anything for exposure. But then when people try to make their money, people are like, oh, not like that, though. That's not how I want to make your money. You're right. So it's really a weird line, you know?
00:31:45
Speaker
Yeah, and you know and you know what, i'm I'm almost regretting this conversation because I do think i do think there there is something, and I think there is something necessary about having to talk about this stuff when you're talking about art um because ah because capitalism really affects our ability to make art ah in both directions. Yes.
00:32:10
Speaker
both if we don't get paid enough, we can't keep making art, and if we ah ask for too much money, then people reject us and we can't keep making art. so um But I do, I think I resent the fact that just being a fan of art means that, like Right now, me and you are just being fans, right? We're just fans of a thing. yeah And there's something about capitalism that forces fans to sometimes just have to talk about economy yeah in a way that it's like, why should I, oh man, why should I even have to think about this just to like a piece of art?
00:32:49
Speaker
Yeah. But it feels like I do. And I like I'd rather just never think about pricing structure and never think about economy and just care about content and like the content of the art and the meaning of the art and the intent of the art. But oh, trust me, I want that more than anything. Yeah. Because just ah as a visual artist, it's one of the hardest, especially as like a painter. But it's like.
00:33:14
Speaker
Yeah, it's it's it's just, it's it's really, really tough because the art has now become a product.
Microtransactions in Gaming
00:33:20
Speaker
And we have to think of it like a product, because we think about like, oh man, I love this new show. I hope it gets six seasons. What is its advertising model? I really want to, like, that's a shitty way to have to think about something. We should just be able to watch it and be like, I love the show. I can't wait to watch it forever. and Instead, as fans, we have to be like, okay, how can how can we make it survive and maybe they're doing it wrong and we have to criticize the show runners so that they change the structure so that it survives in this economy and then we could keep watching it for five seasons or six seasons or whatever. Like that's such a weird shitty thing. yeah And it's its it's not our fault as fans, it's like the fault of the system that we're in doing this to art.
00:34:10
Speaker
Yeah, it's just, I would, I want to appeal to people and just encourage people to think of things in, in more of a gray area. Cause some things are black and white. This is not, this is very tough. You know, anything that has to do with art and arts and products and indie devs and indie artists, it's way more complicated than you can even imagine. Except for.
00:34:35
Speaker
microtransactions inside games. That fucking sucks. It doesn't really happen in the games that we, the kind of games we play, but do you imagine it just makes, Oh my God. Like, Oh, do you want to solve this puzzle? The inventory item will be $13. You need this magnifying glass for $15.99. I know.
00:34:58
Speaker
Oh, i well you can get a rubber chicken with a pulley in the middle that is golden for an extra $4. Yeah, no, i talk it's very exploitative. like I understand the hustle. I understand the the desire to do that because people, when you make money, you want more money. that's been it's Really, it's been proven psychologically. it's why It's why so many, I think, wealthier ah YouTubers, let's just call it what it is, Mr. Beast. I think when you have a certain type of success, you want more of it, you are addicted to it now. You become evil.
00:35:37
Speaker
Kind of. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, maybe not like to fit like by definition, maybe not. But yeah, you become greedy and you become addicted to to there isn't enough money. and And I'll just say this like very earnestly for myself. it has It doesn't have to do with money. But when I first started getting more views on my channel, suddenly that became so like my my first goal for a few counts on videos was five thousand hits. That was my first goal. And I told myself I'd be happy with that.
00:36:07
Speaker
But then you get that and then you raise it to like 10,000 heads and then you raise that to 25 and then 50 and then 100,000. And so it just because I just want more of it now because I got it. And now I need more of it. And it's it's it's tough. I'm trying to be honest with you guys. I hear you. This is a thing that happens in. ah Yeah, I mean, now that M dogs flush tackular has gotten. Seven hundred million views. I'm just looking towards that billion. Right.
00:36:37
Speaker
Yeah, I guess you don't really need me or the podcast anymore. Oh, no, I make I lose money on it. I have to pay to be for every view. I have to pay them 14 cents for every person that watches refuse.
00:36:52
Speaker
I, well, now they love me because ah I owe them, I owe them somewhere in the realm of $70 million. dollars But, yeah. In fact, very soon I think I might have to flee the country, but I can empathize. Our next episode, yeah, I had to bail Matt out of jail. He couldn't pay to me for his weird flush, like his weird flush series.
00:37:21
Speaker
flesh Yeah, so I don't know. Anyway, Rise of the Golden Idol, i'm really stoked to I'm really stoked to play it. I was just a little surprised by that pricing model, I think. But I mean, fucking, I'm going to pay for it. There's zero chance I am not going to ah pay for everything these people make for the rest of time. Right? It would take a real fuck up.
00:37:48
Speaker
for this team to lose, for me to lose faith in this team. They do mystery games, right? They really do. You want to feel like a detective? You play yeah Case and Rise of the Golden Idol. Yeah. Okay. So, Roses, what are we doing what are we doing today?
00:38:08
Speaker
I'm already laughing at it. um I just mean, I i just mean like, ah I don't mean to tell the listeners. I mean, what are we doing? Why are we doing? Why are we even here? No, like yeah know what are we doing? What are we doing today? Today?
00:38:25
Speaker
we are bringing you, the viewer, even more ranking adventure games we may or may not have played. We are just gonna rank because we want, that's what we wanna do. We wanna do an extra, like an extra set. We wanna devote a little more time, I think, to to ranking the game. yeah So we're just gonna rank until we cannot rank anymore. can i I think we have, we settled initially on, because this is our only segment,
00:38:55
Speaker
but after this, like that's gonna be our only segment for the rest of this episode. So I think we settled on an hour and we will try and get to an hour of just ranking and see just how many we can do. So why don't we just stop fucking jawing and get to the ranking segment.
00:39:30
Speaker
Matt Aucamp! Stop Flushmaster! Yeah, let's let's see who we're giving the Flush and who we're giving the Lush to today. Wow. That is terrible.
00:39:44
Speaker
got it the I swear this will ah this character will only last for this episode. I already can't stand him. He's terrible. He sucks so bad. I don't know why he's talking to somebody like flicking the roses. That's terrible. There are people who
Ranking Adventure Games
00:40:00
Speaker
like this is their character. Yeah. Who like they're like, oh, that's who I am, brother.
00:40:08
Speaker
ah All right. So here's what we're going to do. We're just going to jump right into it. What we do in this segment is that is I have a list of ah let's see. Let's see how many it it's up to because I've recently added ah twenty twenty four 2024's adventure games to it. I have a list of 3,300 adventure games. ah huh And I have numbered all of them and I ah use a random number generator to pull, again, just randomly pull a game out of the history of adventure games. And me and Rose as we rank them,
00:40:47
Speaker
on a list against every other video game, whether we've played them or not. ah I stole the structure of this from the Serial Podcast, The Empty Bowl, by um justin are Daniel Gubehr and Justin McElroy. I love Serial. I just want to put that out there. Serial is the best. What if we stole their actual segment and we just did it with Serial?
00:41:16
Speaker
No, ah right but ah the other the only other rule is that ah once an episode, though, we can skip one and only one. And if we skip one, we can't skip anymore. But because we are doing this for an entire hour, what I'm going to say is every, say, 20 minutes, we can skip one. OK. So we get to skip at least three. Got it.
00:41:40
Speaker
And we're just gonna see how fucking many we can get through. Okay, so in this instance, I have pulled them ahead of time and they are so they are in groups of five. ah So I want you to give me a number from one to six. Just randomly. Just from one through six. And we'll go through, a yeah, and we'll take that list. Okay, four.
00:42:06
Speaker
Number four, here we go. Okay, so our first game is number 547 from 1998. It is by Humungous Entertainment. really It is Pajamasam 2 Thunder and Lightning Aren't So Frightening. I was gonna say, which like, which pot putt-putt Pajamasam game are we talking about? This is Thunder and Lightning Aren't So Frightening. and This game, yes, go ahead.
00:42:37
Speaker
Oh, I was just gonna say, I played it and it's lovely. it's It's a lovely children's adventure game. The Pajama Sam games are so cute, at least the first three, and they,
00:42:49
Speaker
this is the one, oh what yeah oh yeah, he has to go to like another world and like fix a weather machine or something, right? Yeah. And there's like,
00:43:03
Speaker
there's a bunch of characters, there's like a lightning character and a cloud character. yeah This was actually a, this was a really good one. I fucking love this game. And if and people don't know, Humongous Entertainment is where a lot of the LucasArts guys went after they left LucasArts. Like Ron Gilbert founded Humongous Entertainment. And his whole thing was like not making educational games, just making entertainment, like adventure games for children.
00:43:31
Speaker
Yeah, and they rule, they rule, they're so much fun. Like if there was a period of time towards the beginning of the pandemic where just every day after work I would finish i would play one humongous entertainment game and it was so relaxing and like just like a little shot of joy.
00:43:47
Speaker
I yeah, I love I love the putt putt games. I would be honest with you. I think they are beautiful and and whimsical and perfect for kids. And I would put this pretty high up there as an adventure game. It is an adventure game. It's just simply for children. I'm like going to just from the top, just say this is top 10. I think so at this point. Yeah, at this point. Right. Yeah. um and So.
00:44:14
Speaker
I can't say it goes above Papers, Please, because Papers, Please is just such a, but it might, I think it like rivals Lamplight City. Okay.
00:44:26
Speaker
They're going for such different things. And obviously, Lamplight City is more mature and layered and textual, right? But Pajama Sam is just such a good... Pajama Sam 2, Thunder and Lightning Guard, so frightening. It's just such a good point and click adventure game. It is, it is. Where's Fran Bow currently? Number three. I mean, okay, that's right. It needs to go below Fran Bow. Right.
00:44:53
Speaker
i I would say it goes either right above or right below Lamplight City, because then after that we have Cube Escape and Phantasmagoria. I would put it above Lamplight City. Yeah, I think it's just, it's a little more classic. It's got a little more staying power. I think Lamplight City is probably more our speed just because we are adults. But I think, Pajama Sam 2, Thunderlight, there's just so few games for kids. there And this doesn't talk down to them.
00:45:24
Speaker
yeah which is another thing that I think is really important about Kids' Game. Okay, let's go another one. All right, ah so the next one on list four is ah game 29.56 by a Total Mayhem Games. I think this is the third in the series. It's called We Were Here Forever. We Were Here Forever?
00:45:49
Speaker
So what I know about this series again, what do you know about the We Were Here games? Absolutely nothing. Nothing. The We Were Here games, all I know about them are they are co-op. Okay. Like asynchronous co-op games. Okay. So it's either kind of escape roomy.
00:46:14
Speaker
ah Sure. but That's what the tag is on on Steam. On the Steam is the escape room games. Yeah, I've never actually played one. um They seem very popular. I i had a partner where we we were looking for these asynchronous games to play and i we couldn't figure out how to make this multiplayer work.
00:46:43
Speaker
so i forget yet I forget why. It's online co-op. Oh, I think we were trying to do it locally and just couldn't. And ah we both had steam decks and you can't. I think maybe it's not optimized for steam deck or it doesn't work for steam deck. Oh, it doesn't because I think you need a microphone. You need to talk to each other.
00:47:01
Speaker
Right. Oh, it's one of those. OK. Got it. So um for that, because it failed me so and my girlfriend, I think I think I'm going to kick it down a few notches, but I mean. They get positive reviews, they look pretty cool, and I love an escape room game.
00:47:27
Speaker
Yeah, it's just in terms of adventure game, though, um I would put it a little lower. And I'm not saying that because it is a good or bad game. I think this has less of what we define personally. OK, because there's not much you don't think there's going to be much of a story here. I don't know. Yeah. And also co-op puzzle adventure. I'm not saying it's not an adventure game. I'm just saying it's.
00:47:54
Speaker
It's got more elements to it than than just the the three things that we usually talk about. We could ah insult um ah Francisco Gonzalez twice and put it back down at like 24 right above Ben Jordan, paranormal investigator seven, the Cardinal sins.
00:48:14
Speaker
I would put it below because Ben Jordan is more of an adventure game to me, personally. Would you put it, but I would put it above the mediocre block. That's what I was thinking. That's what I was looking around there. So I would say if it goes below pen Ben Jordan, I would say it goes ah above the will of Arthur Flabbington. Yeah, I would be okay with that. Okay. All right. I'm into it. All right. Let's keep going. So that was, we were here forever. It drops in at our number 25. Okay.
00:48:42
Speaker
Okay, so our next game, ready? Yup. Is ah number 1,833 from 2017. It is called Cosmonavtes.
00:48:59
Speaker
I'm sorry, what? Cosmonovtase? Cosmonovtase? What do you not get about Cosmonovtase? ah like cosminovk Cosmonovtase escape reality. Cosmonovtase escape reality. Escape reality. It is a hidden object game.
00:49:24
Speaker
Clearly not American made, right? Right. i think I think in English, it's like cosmonauts, right? I don't. I have no idea. How are we getting another escape room game right away? ah Is it I don't think is it an escape room game? I think it's a hidden object game. Oh, sorry. Yeah, that's so odd. Like when I clicked on it, it said escape room. But when I. Oh, OK. It said hidden object.
00:49:52
Speaker
Me and you love a hidden object game, but this does look kind of low quality. um i we have given much higher quality and not right I give it a credit for being only three dollars. Oh, that's nice.
00:50:10
Speaker
Yeah. ah yeah
00:50:17
Speaker
um with Earth's and resources dwindling, the Cosmonavte's program is announced. The goal is one, assemble a cadet team and send them out to colonize another planet. Help Valla become one of its first cadets and fulfill her dream of becoming an astronaut. This is the first game in the Cosmonavte's adventure. series I fucking love that. I love winning games. So this was from, what, 2017? Mine says 2021 on Steam.
00:50:46
Speaker
That's interesting. Okay, so this game first came out in 2017, but it didn't come to Steam until 2021, three days before its sequel came out. It did get a sequel. Oh, interesting. It got a sequel called Academy Escape. Okay. um Which is just another hidden object game that looks like it has a few more ah like logic puzzles. Yeah. Than its other one.
00:51:11
Speaker
um So the fact that it got a second one, because I was going to say, I fucking love it when a game's like, this is the first in a series and then there's never another one. But I am wrong. This one had a second one, Cosmonavtes.
00:51:23
Speaker
by LK Mad. It needs to go in the mediocre block. Let's be honest. Yeah, but it is a hidden object game and I love those guys. Well, I love them too, but like we have to think that like we've played so many hidden objecting. We got to think about those other hidden object. Yeah, you're right. You're right. um OK, so I think it's going to go. All right, you're right. So.
00:51:52
Speaker
Why don't we split, here's my, here's my pitch. Okay. I think it goes above Elaine and displaced reality and again, and a strong astronomical. Um, so it goes towards, like towards the top of the mediocre block because we love hidden object games. I think it splits Randall's Monday and crop bought in the secret of the Sorbian King.
00:52:16
Speaker
Fine, only because we like hidden object games. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is our new 37. Okay, so. I love hidden object games. I really do though. and Me too, me too. I really love them. ah Number eight, one eight from 2005 by Kiaops Studio. It is Voyage.
00:52:43
Speaker
Inspired by Jules Verne is by The Adventure Company. It's just called Voyage? It's the adventure company called Voyage. Oh, The Adventure Game Company? It's called, the yeah, by The Adventure Company, published by The Adventure Company, created by KeyOps Studio. KeyOps made Safe Cracker. They made Return to Mysterious Island. They made, um shit, what else did they make? Let's see.
00:53:09
Speaker
They made Dracula 3, but none of the other Dracula games. That's straight. I just realized, so the name of the game is Voyage inspired by Jules Verne. And
Diverse Perspectives in Gaming
00:53:20
Speaker
in the United Kingdom, it's known as Journey to the Moon. Okay. Okay. Here's the thing. I like the adventure company. ah They have done some interesting Yeah, some of their games suck. Like, you gotta be straight up. Some of their games fucking suck. A lot of their games are like, what the fuck? And maybe I'm just a little nostalgia glasses coming on there a little bit. But um I don't think they're terrible. But this does not look good to me. No. All right. OK. I'm going to I'm going to send you to OK. Go to ah ah Google Image Search. Google Image. OK. And the the image on IMDB.
00:54:03
Speaker
is the first thing I'm looking at that I'm like, ooh, because there's this alien man who looks like he's like, his body is like a stick. Okay, hold on, i'm I'm wrong. So it looks like his body's like a stick. I just found it. But then if you if you look down a few images to ah adventure classic gaming's image,
00:54:32
Speaker
He's just got two very long, very thin legs. That's how I draw my characters. Does this man not have a body? like he's where This is the thing. OK, if he's an alien and he is ah like he he was wearing clothes, OK, fine. This alien race also developed clothes. But why would they develop a shirt?
00:54:58
Speaker
with like pauldrons and like, so if if they don't have bodies, they just have arms and legs. Why are they like, I know i got to cover up this trunk. You don't have one. Wow. It looks really bad. um but I'm clicking through and this design looks really bad. I am shocked.
00:55:20
Speaker
um well ah steve Steve's Legacy Game Corner says, i close out to steve i must say she's just steve our boy Steve says, I must say, Voyage is a most enjoyable game. It has a good variety of puzzles, some familiar, some not with lots of interaction, which is always a big plus. um ah Because of the tone matching exercises, tone deaf players might want to think twice about tech. We can't leave out tone deaf players.
00:55:50
Speaker
yeah This is going towards the bar. We can't leave out the, our our audience.
00:55:58
Speaker
we speak We speak for the tone deaf. I can't believe this is on GOG. This old game that has been lost to time, I can't believe I can download it and play it. You could just get it right now. Yeah, I could get it right now. It doesn't look good, roses.
00:56:17
Speaker
Okay, I understand. All right, why don't you say like, okay, we have 55 games on here. Yeah. What 10 digit would you put it in? I would put this in, if you're asking my personal opinion. Yeah. but Like in the 40s. 40s, that's exactly what I was thinking. no um I think in this goes, okay, where does it go in terms of like Minecraft story mode? Tough decision. I mean, I'm going to say that this is more of an adventure game than Minecraft story mode. And probably better than Violet. Probably. I think I would agree with, I would agree and I could see that being the case.
00:57:09
Speaker
So now like, how about Kahn's Christian Anderson, the ugly prince duckling? Oh boy. That game looked weird. Honestly, would put it above that too. ah Moons of madness. Let me, let me, I think. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I think. Okay. I'm gonna say, oh all right, so that's where it goes. It goes, yeah it goes in at 43.
00:57:38
Speaker
Voyage inspired by Jules Verne, okay. um Our next game, ah number 595, the Crystal Key by Earthlight Games, 1999. Wow, okay, Earthlight Games, the Crystal Key. well Oh, does it look not great? I gotta say, just from the very start, it looks like, um it's I think it's a mist clone. No, why? ah yeah No, stop it.
00:58:07
Speaker
Yeah, we get so fucking many of those, huh? We do. Yeah, it does look like that. It looks really Miss Cloney and maybe a little like, okay, my first thought was that it looks a little like Journeyman Project, but now I'm looking closer. Yeah, I think it's a Miss Clone. I'm not. I think it is, yeah. I'm tired of all these Miss Clones. I'm tired of Miss Clones. You know what, let's just be unfair to this one and say it's going like bottom five.
00:58:38
Speaker
I'm not even gonna look any closer at it. I think it's going, I think it's going above free DC, but below wild, wild west, the steel assassin. I'm with you, no, I'm with you. We're salty now. Yeah, let's just get salty. Let's just fucking, all right, buy crystal key. You go towards the bottom. Buy Felicia. Buy Felicia, buy Felicia the crystal key. um You know what? And because we're just gonna keep going,
00:59:02
Speaker
hu I'm, instead of just doing five, the original five, like the five that I pulled, I'm going to also say, let's do the extra. Cause I always like, all right, so when I pull these ahead of time, I'll pull five, cause that's how many we do per episode. And then I'll pull an extra one in case we skip. But since we're just going and going, let's just do that sixth one. So no number six, so ah is number 2,417.
00:59:31
Speaker
o by machine boy from 2020 reviewed on adventure gamers by yours truly. Oh yeah. This is the second time this has happened. Nice. Uh, it's the game in bracelet. Yeah. Okay. Okay. Well, you know, so okay. So the, the game, the, the, the, the users I think disagreed with me a little bit with my review.
00:59:58
Speaker
But I loved this game. It was like a coming of age game. and ah It's you are a kid in like a Norwegian city. um Oh, it's by the people who made Mermaid of the Milky Way, which I think was a very popular indie game. Yeah. um It's got a little bit of a Wind Waker vibe, doesn't it? Yeah, there's like vector graphics. And so you're like on this.
01:00:23
Speaker
ah you you return You go back to this like island, I think, where your parents grew up. This has been a while, so. um and It's like low poly 3D art, right? yeah And you have like a magic bracelet that can, that you have like a telekinesis. And you're walking around this island and you know making friends with this. And I remember feeling really inspired, like I remember feeling really moved by it. I remember it had,
01:00:52
Speaker
a great soundtrack. So you can play it on the Switch. ah Yeah, you can play it on the Switch. I'm visiting that now. I love how it looks. Yeah. And I trust your judgment. It's giving me a cozy vibe similar to like a short hike. It's the sort of cozy game that you that makes you cry. Yeah. Oh, like To The Moon. Do you remember that game? That gave me a good cry. Oh, I never played To The Moon.
01:01:21
Speaker
Oh, man, it's ah oh, God, you're going to have to play it. So sad. But I remember really
Early 2000s 3D Adventure Games
01:01:30
Speaker
feeling like I was like pulled into this game, its story and its environment. I i remember really digging in bracelet. In fact, I would recommend it to listeners. Yeah. So I think I put this pretty high if you ah if you are cool with that. Yeah, I am.
01:01:46
Speaker
Okay, so. No, I'm not. No, fuck you. um This is the end of the podcast. I want to put it right below Lamplight City, if that's okay with you. I want to put it way up at number seven. I think it's above Phantasmagoria, which is a legendary game, but it's not good. And and again, that cube escape.
01:02:08
Speaker
We put Cube Escape up at number whatever, like in the top 10, because it's it was the only Cube Escape game on here. But it's just one of the Cube Escape games. Right. Right. OK. All right. I'm down. So that's ah list number four. where Where are we at on time? We have hit 108. So we we missed our first skip. We're 20 minutes in. So we're not allowed to skip? No. So we're allowed to skip, but we missed our first one. OK.
01:02:38
Speaker
So now we'll only have two skips for the rest of it. I'm trying not to. I don't like skipping things. Just in general. Because we're at 20 minutes, I'm just going to read down the list super fast. Go for it. Yeah. Do you want to do it? I can post it. OK. Yeah, I'll do it. I'll do it so good. I'm going to make it sexy.
01:02:59
Speaker
Okay, so how many do we have here? How many am I listing off? I will be listing off- 57. Oh, how joyous. All right, are you ready? I am ready, I am ready. Just blaze through. All right, starting with number one, we have Portal. The Last Door, season one. Fran Bow. Papers, please. Pajama Sam 2. Thunder and Lightning. Aren't so frightening. Lamplight City. Embracelet. Cube Escape. The Lake. Phantasmagoria. Scratches. Dreamfall Journeys. What?
01:03:28
Speaker
Sorry, I was just, I was just yelling. I was just throwing in. We're at number 10. So the listeners get like, I just, just get a little, okay, sorry. Go ahead. Do a great Matt. All right. Number 10. Yes. Number 10. We have scratches. That's our number 10. Continuing. Dreamfall chapters. Been there. Damn that. Clam man. Amnesia rebirth. Wave tail. Midnight girl. Related chapter one. Everything is back. Yeah. Remember that one?
01:03:58
Speaker
so cats Oh god. ah Agatha Christie and then there were none. Nancy Drew, ghost of Thornton Hall, and at number 20, Avis Green's final repose, a classic.
01:04:13
Speaker
All right. It's losing it. Last half of darkness beyond the spirits I visit teen the betrayal murder she wrote fuck yeah. ah Legend of hand Ben Jordan paranormal investigator case seven cardinal sins. ah We are here forever the will of Arthur Flabbington, an acridist many happy returns hell a cyberpunk thriller. And number 30 we have art of murder cards of destiny.
01:04:41
Speaker
Continuing, dark grim mariopolis, sentient, the seventh guest, ew, a whisper in the twilight. We put that but that's so high. What, at the seventh guest? Yeah. It makes sense. i We're leaving it. It makes sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's iconic. Well, we can't change it. We can't change it. We can't change it. It's yeah. Number thirty three, seven guests. We're only allowed to change games that we've never played. Then that that then we play for the first time. That's our that's the world. Remember, that is fair. That is very fair. All right. Seven guests, seven guests, a whisper in the twilight to pony a doomsday.
01:05:18
Speaker
Mazovian Adventure, Krabat and the Secret of the Sorbian King, Cosmonautis, Escape Reality. but please cosmo I think I think. Randall's Monday and at 40, again. Elena Displaced Reality, Astronomica, The Quest for the Edge of the Universe, Moons of Madness, A Voyage, Inspired by Jules Verne. I can't believe that's the name of it.
01:05:44
Speaker
yeah yeah What are these titles? Hans Christian Anderson, the ugly prince duckling, Violet, Minecraft Story Mode, Batman, Partners in Peril, Miasmata, Blue Force, the fan, Wild Wild the Blast, the Steel Assassin, the Crystal Key, Free DC, Mystery of the Nautilus, of Light and Darkness, the prophecy, ah and the last one, the very last one on our list. Give it the flush!
01:06:09
Speaker
We're gonna give it the flush, weird truth is stranger than fiction. Whoo, all right. So give me a number, one out of six, one to six, except for four. Two. Okay, all right. So ah we're gonna add five to six more. Number 2,994. This is called Baker Street Breakouts, a Sherlockian Adventure.
01:06:37
Speaker
Uh, that sounds amazing. Yeah. Uh, sorry. A Sherlockian escape adventure. Okay. I see. I see. Okay. ah kind Sherlockian escape adventure. Um, it's this one. Uh, what are your, what are your thoughts? It looks, uh, very homemade. It's not It's not bad. I've played a lot of homemade games, you know,
01:07:04
Speaker
It's a, ah just so people can, it's a RPG maker game. It's yeah clearly an RPG maker game. I don't know. I think it looks cute. I do. I think it looks cute. The story. Sherlock is bored. None of the recent cases have been interesting enough to catch his attention until one day Sherlock receives a ah message from Moriarty. That's the bad guy. Roses, that's the bad guy. Got him. That's the bad guy.
01:07:29
Speaker
ah The changes that changes everything ah da like and Wait is the message like I love you but now wax and you know everything We can actually see what the message is it's on the it's in the screenshots Sherlock Oh, do you miss me come and play with me? I am waiting for you visit me at home. I love you Sherlock reads that Do you miss me? Come and play with me. I'm waiting for you. Visit me at home." And he goes, and he goes, Watson, this changes everything! watch And Watson's like... And we're in love, and we're running away together. And Watson's like, how? And he's like, because he said, play with me! That's all I ever wanted, Watson! All I ever wanted was for him to come play with me!
01:08:16
Speaker
This is so interesting. Yeah, we have the list of characters, Sherlock Holmes, Dr. Watson, James Moriarty, and Irene Adler, which I don't like how she is depicted here. Actually, she has my quality. She has blonde hair and green eyes, which is not how I imagine Irene Adler. Just all of them.
01:08:35
Speaker
All of these these are like very interesting takes on the characters because we have we have Sherlock Holmes. He's in like a it's like John Wick. Yes. Yes. He looks like John Wick, like a slightly Asian John Wick. Then Dr. John Watson has blonde hair slicked back.
01:08:52
Speaker
And like, ah ah really this no but eyebrows i notice went that out nobody's get this, but it looks like ah Dr. Walter Langkowski, Sasquatch from ah Alpha Flight. And then Dr. James Moriarty, or James Moriarty, he is in like a superhero suit. He looks just like a rapscallion to me. He's got kind of messy hair.
01:09:16
Speaker
I'd like Irene Adler. She looks like, you know what Irene Adler looks like? She looks like an acronist. I don't like that she has like my quality. She's got that messy blonde hair, green eyes. I don't like it. I don't like looking at myself. You wouldn't date Sherlock Holmes. Me? Date Sherlock Holmes? Yeah. No, no. You'd give him the flush.
01:09:39
Speaker
I give him the flush. He looks push like John Wick. Although, ironically, I would date John Wick. So I don't know. I've got things in my head to process. You've got a lot going on. It's very complicated. Also, I think this might be timed. I'm like looking at screenshots and there's a timer that goes, yeah, succeed before the time runs out. So you
Highlighting Diverse Voices
01:10:00
Speaker
have to beat this adventure in a time limit.
01:10:02
Speaker
That makes me put it down lower. I do not like being on it. But what I'm going to say is it looks like kind of interesting. It looks bad. Like it doesn't look like it's going to be great. Yeah. It looks kind of interesting. It does. It does actually look a little interesting. Yeah, I agree with you there. So that makes me want to put it around dark grim mariupolis. OK.
01:10:24
Speaker
A game that also doesn't look like super great, but ah is kind of like interesting. But are we going to maybe enjoy playing it? Probably. Yeah, yeah, exactly. So do you want to put it right below dark grim mariopolis because ah Ukraine. What?
01:10:41
Speaker
We need to be nice to Ukraine, so it goes above. Or below. I love the Ukraine, we love the Ukraine. yeah what is ah what is What would be below it then? What would be below Baker Street? Whatever sentient was. Okay, I'm fine with it. Okay. Let's keep going. All right, next up we have, oh no! All right, we have 868, Ankh, Heart of Osiris.
01:11:12
Speaker
Now, if anybody doesn't know, the Ankh games are like, they were- Like Ankh? Like Ankh. A-H-N-K sorry. Yeah, okay, got it. um They are, they're by Deck13 Interactive, they are, ah even even the Wikipedia says these are similar to the Runaway games.
01:11:36
Speaker
and These are in the heart. These were released in the heart of the quote unquote death of adventure games. yeah Like there's 3D. It gets fairly good reviews, but I don't trust it. Right. Like mixed on Steam. So it's one of those. Yeah. Yeah. It's hard to make adventure games around that time. when Nobody knew what they were what they wanted to to do. Everybody thought that they should go 3D.
01:12:04
Speaker
And I think that put off a lot of people. It put off me. I thought it was everything was ugly. ah Yeah. And hard and yeah on Cardivar Cyrus does look ugly. And it's a German game. And I think it it suffers from that thing that ah ah ah Allister Becketking talked to us about. This idea of these non-English speaking countries got these games and they were poorly translated, so they people just were like,
01:12:38
Speaker
oh, these are those games that don't make any sense. And so then to copy them, they make games that don't make any sense, ah even in their own language. And then they got translated to English and made even less sense. um So like Runaway is a perfect example of that. So I think this is like that kind of game. I've never played the Ankh games. I kind of don't want to play the Ankh games. I kind of don't want to. So what are you what are your thoughts on Ankh?
01:13:05
Speaker
It's hard because like some, okay. There are some 3d games in this, in this vein that I do like and I, and I know you don't like them, but things like monkey Island four, I did like that game. And there are even some people who really like Gabriel night three, which is the, the, the three.
01:13:24
Speaker
I hated, I mean, there's a lot to hate about Gabriel night three, but there is also a lot to love about Gabriel night three. no So it's hard. I, I'm trying not to judge it, like, but also clearly that's our whole job here. Oh, right. Sorry. I'm a very judgmental person.
01:13:42
Speaker
No, um I think I would be inclined to put it a little lower because it doesn't have the staying power that Gabriel Knight does. Because be even though Gabriel Knight three is an ugly game, there are people who liked the content. yeah This i've I've never really heard of, so I need to put it kind of low.
01:14:01
Speaker
I, you know what I'm going to say? I think it goes like near Randall's Monday. I feel like they have similar vibes in my head, where it's like, these are these, these are these games that came out.
01:14:13
Speaker
that made such a little impact, right? yeah They just have like a mediocre vibe to them. and um But they were made by people who are passionate about ah about adventure games and wanted to make adventure games at a time when it wasn't popular to make adventure games. So like you can't just discount that entirely. Yeah, I agree. um I would put it though, I think the I think I think Randall's Monday might have better art and more innovative art, because it's very clear to me that this ah ac just wanted to do the 3D thing that everyone else was doing. So I would put it below Randall's Monday. OK, I'm into that. Yeah. Let's put it's got to come down to the art style, you guys, you know.
01:15:04
Speaker
All right, this game actually is going to, for a surprise for maybe an unfair reason, is gonna get a bump from me. this is called This is a game called The Slaughter Act One from brain trial from Brainchild Studios. um It is a 2016 game. it is It is really nice, pixely art. ah It doesn't get the best reviews in the world.
01:15:31
Speaker
reminds me of an English haunting just very a little bit. This is chunkier. It's not as polished, but that is what it reminds me of. Yeah, it reminds me a little of the last door. and I guess a little less chunky than the last door. Maybe the art style reminds me of ah dreams in the witch house, maybe a little bit. I do. like I like it, though. Yeah. And here's what I'll say.
01:15:51
Speaker
I first became aware of the slaughter when ah for a previous episode, I was looking up flat black developers because they are so fucking rare in adventure games. um And so this game has a black developer and that is cool. And I wanna support black developers in a landscape where there is almost none because like, you know,
01:16:17
Speaker
We, you know, all art needs voices from diverse perspectives. If all art comes from the same fuck. So like, not even, not even for, what do you call it? ah ah Woke reasons. And I do think, woke. I do think it is good to be woke. I don't i think it is shitty to use that pejoratively because I think we should treat all people with respect. I just think that word is stupid at this point. It's one of those, you know what I mean? It's like, ugh, let's just be good people. yeah I understand what you're saying. I am also, I would just call myself a progressive person at that point. Yeah. yeah if we were if we If we use the word woke to just mean progressive or empathetic, then yeah, we should all be fucking woke. Are you kidding me? yeah
01:17:04
Speaker
but not even just for progressive reasons. ah Just for the sake of art, we can't have a genre where we only have one cultural perspective. Gretchen, okay. Adventure games are made internationally. We get a lot of cultural perspectives, but again, very little from but black people in any country.
01:17:25
Speaker
To be honest, this is my vibe. Like, come on. Yeah. Look at it. This is this is my vibe. I think we got to play. So I'm going to put this in the fucking top 10. I would. I this is my vibe. A hundred percent. Like when I said when I opened it up, I'm like, oh, did you not hear that? i was like Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, it goes below the last door. It goes below papers, please. I think it goes below Lamplight City. I think, you know, what I think it's going to go. How about this?
01:17:52
Speaker
What if we put it between Cube Escape and Phantasmagoria at number nine? Okay, I'm good. All right, cool. Yeah, and again, I don't mean to take away from it in any way by talking about the cultural aspect of it. I just think that is an important conversation that we do need diverse perspectives in games and we just aren't fucking getting them in adventure games. All right,
Legend Entertainment Games
01:18:16
Speaker
number 337. It is a game called Mission Critical.
01:18:23
Speaker
Sounds familiar. It's by Legend Entertainments from 1995. I don't know shit about it. It kind of looks boring as hell. yeah I do know about Legend Entertainment. Legend Entertainment is where Josh Mandel worked for a while. okay he and Legend Entertainment is the Callahan's people. They did Callahan's crosstime saloon. oh ok i want to say I don't want to get this wrong. I know they've done Companions of Xanth. I wonder if they did Shonara.
01:18:54
Speaker
No, but they did. They did Eric, the unready. They. Oh, they didn't do. shara Yeah, they did do. But they did it. Legend secure. This is a pretty decent um developer. I will say one of the things interesting about it is it does have FMV.
01:19:13
Speaker
yeah because I've live acted FMV in it, yeah which i you know we' ah we can be a little bit of suckers for that. But it's like live acted FMV that's like um interspersed with really bad early 3D.
01:19:27
Speaker
Yeah. It's Steve. It says it's got strategy elements. No, no, no. The trailer is not ah helping me to decide. um But it does. This actually does feel like Callahan's or companions of Xanth or Shannara if it had FMV, like ah not just FMV, but live acted.
01:19:49
Speaker
elements to it. I see the interface for playthrough is very similar. It looks just like Callahan's. And I do like that kind of stuff, but I'm going to let you be the rancor here then because I'm, I'm getting so little of an opinion about this game. And I know, and I think that you, because of the way it looks, you might feel that way. I would say that people might even feel that way about like Xanth and Callahan's and Shonara. Uh, but because legend is a pretty good company, I would put it, and that's tough in the upper, upper mediocre block upper.
01:20:29
Speaker
Upper
Classic Adventure Games
01:20:30
Speaker
mediocre, okay. So somewhere around hell, a cyberpunk thriller. Yeah, ah sadly. Do you think it goes above or below that? I'm gonna say, I'm gonna still stick my neck out for anachronist and say, I think it goes below anachronist. That's fine, you you can defend that. That's totally fine. um All right, then it's going at our new number 30. Yeah. So ah number 45 from 1985.
01:20:57
Speaker
Ew, sorry. By mag, the company Magnetic Scrolls. Okay. This is called The Pawn. Oh, I don't know what this is. Which is a text parser adventure. I mean, it's like one of these text adventures with graphics, right? Like you basically do a text, a text parser, text adventure, and. You do a text. You do a text. This is one of those games where you do a text.
01:21:25
Speaker
It's kind of old school, honestly. Yeah. And this is a type of game we don't really have represented on here. We don't have anything from the 1980s on our list. No, that can't be. That is true. How could that be possible? I know. What about Below the Route? Did we? No, that was a recommendation. That was an honor. Oh, god.
01:21:47
Speaker
I don't know where I would put this because it seems a little forgotten. um I don't even know if we can if we can get this anywhere except for like, you know, downloading it as like in a bad and weird game. It was a good thing. It was a Commodore 64 game. Oh, interesting. Okay.
01:22:04
Speaker
Yeah. ah So who's even fucking played this thing? I don't know. This is definitely the game. I don't know if you're familiar with like Homestar Runner, big fan over here. I watched everything on the website and they had their own games. The Homestar people, they created adventure games.
01:22:23
Speaker
Sure, sure, sure. And this, the Pong, looks like one of the ones they were parroting, which makes me kind of laugh. um There's a big wizard in one of the screenshots. That's good. And there is a and there apparently there is an election in the game. And ah one of the election boxes says, vote for gringo. What? I don't fucking know.
01:22:47
Speaker
i don't I don't know where to put this. ah The store room, the description of the store room is, this is the alchemist store room full of dusty old rubbish. I love dusty old rubbish. ah Somebody called um the Amiga guru did do a review on it.
01:23:12
Speaker
Let me just see what he says at the end. Cause he's recapping it too, but let's see what he says. The pawn became a classic and it still is today. If you haven't done it already, I suggest you secure a copy of it. It will give you a fairly hard time since we're not used to those mechanics anymore. And it's a rather long adventure. In any case, you will have fun. And remember the guru is watching you. I guess that's the tagline. I will say these graphics for 1985.
01:23:38
Speaker
are pretty fucking good, yeah. They're pretty fucking good, dude. That's really impressive. At this time, what were some other 1985 games? Like Mystery House? What was it? No, no, no. It was a little past that. No, no, no. King's Quest III. Yeah, this is so beyond that.
01:24:01
Speaker
um It's beyond King's Quest II. And granted, these aren't moving graphics, these are just, but still. But they're beautiful, yeah. These are pretty, um which put pushes it up a little bit. Okay, where do you wanna put it? I don't know,
Game Critiques and Rankings
01:24:16
Speaker
dude. Above mediocre? I think it's above mediocre for for the time. Yeah. Right? I think it is really beautiful. I think let's put it above our um girl detectives block.
01:24:29
Speaker
So like above Amos Green, Nancy Drew, Agatha Christie, I think. ah That's fair. I think that's very fair. At number 19, the pawn. I like that, I feel good about that. Yeah, for some reason it just seems to fit there. I don't know that I could fully. I don't know if I could fully articulate. um Okay, so we're in our final 20 minute block.
01:24:55
Speaker
ah Give me a number. One. Okay. Stop pick good. I will see. That's a no. First game from 2005 by Off Studios. Five magical amulets. That's the name of it? Yeah. ah It's just a game. atlantical and Oh, it's an app.
01:25:27
Speaker
Well, yeah, you can get it on the you can get it on your phone, but it's from 2005 and five and it it like it's got scum VM support. i see It looks maybe like either a ah oh oh either maybe an AGS game or maybe even just pre-AGS. Yeah, it's by it's the engine is winter mute, so it's not AGS. But it does look very homemade. It looks like it looks like ah somebody who's really good at Microsoft Paint.
01:25:58
Speaker
Like me the or early Photoshop. These graphics upset me. ah told I'm sorry. I try not to be. Art is art and it is very subjective. Personally, this does not look very polished to me. It is very homemade and I probably would put it pretty low. Yeah. But do you want to know what the the main character's name is? What is it? Linda.
01:26:24
Speaker
Oh, well, number one. Oh, yeah. Don't you want to play a Linda? Always. Always. I thought you were going to be like, oh, it's Sarah. And I'm like, wow. But no, Linda. No, it's just Linda. OK, well, I'm looking I'm i'm i'm like skipping through a YouTube play through and she is always facing the side.
01:26:47
Speaker
ah okay Oh, wait, no, you can walk forward ah and her nose disappears. um No, it's yeah. I mean, it's it's this sort of like smoothed over early Photoshop graphics. Yeah, of which I don't. I really don't like um but like like the worst web comics you've ever seen. Yeah.
01:27:12
Speaker
No, um I still would put it pretty low. I like handmade stuff like that, but when i just I'm just trying to envision the other things it's competing for. So bearing that in mind, I would. So it's I think it's going to go like. Oh boy, um it'll be a first point and click like exclusively point and click game that would go below the mediocre block. Wow.
01:27:41
Speaker
Um, but I think, I think it's going to go like maybe between Minecraft story mode and Batman partners of peril. Or is that too low? No, that's not too low to me. Uh, I'm okay with that. Okay. Five magical amulets is the new 53. Oh, wait, wait till you hear the next one. Uh, number 3073 from 2023 is a brand new game by Pavo entertainment.
01:28:12
Speaker
Uh, everybody, brace yourselves for James Paris II, the fountain of eternal drunkenness. God damn it.
01:28:26
Speaker
Why are you all making me type all this stuff? James Paris to the fountain of eternal drunkenness. I mean, it's just one of those fucking adventure games, right? Like, it's just one of those fucking adventure games that was like um a person who grew up on point and click games and was like, I want to make a leisure suit, Larry. Right. Like, I was just going to say that it reminds me of leisure suit like the first i you you click on it in steam and the first screenshot, oh he's got a condom in his inventory. The third screenshot, oh he's in a disgusting bathroom. yes yeah with like With like shit falling out of the toilet. yeah um Oh now he is in a store room with just like a copy and pasted PNG g of a Leisure Suit Larry game on the shelf.
01:29:16
Speaker
And
Kickstarter Game Reviews
01:29:17
Speaker
like, listen, I will say I want to say one thing about this. I appreciate people that love adventure games so much and are so inspired that they go on to do their own thing. Totally get that. I do appreciate that. That being said, it doesn't mean you did a good job. So no, ah no, I mean, i'm I'm glad that they and here's here's the thing that is interesting to me. There are three meters to the left of the inventory. and gri Oh, and here's, he's got two boobs in his inventory, like fake boobs. This is really drop every screenshot I see it drops lower, but there's something that's interesting to me here, which is next to the inventory, there are three meters. There is like a fist meter, a brain meter, and a drunk meter.
01:30:10
Speaker
um And the description says it is totally open play gameplay and has non-linear puzzles. yeah That is interesting. That is interesting. um I just really don't like it. I'm sorry. yeah It looks like a game I'm not gonna like. And you know what it does? It has that sort of um fan art kind of ah like anime fan art kind of art style, where the main characters got those eyes that the outsides are drawn, but the insides are not. Like outsides are outlined, but the insides are not. Yeah, like Opus the Penguin, right? Yes, yes. And you see a lot of like like anime or manga yeah fans that draw their characters like that. And it always, like for some reason, that irks me. Oh, Opus the Penguin.
01:31:05
Speaker
so James Paris, to mind James Paris, you get the flush. I think you're going, I think it's i think it's going pretty low. I think it's gonna go above, no, maybe it'll go below the fan, where you the one where you just torture a woman. Because it looks like- When you put it that way, it's gonna be hard for me to be on board with you, you know that. It looks like it has a, ah it looks like it has, because it looks like it has that sexist kind of idolization of Leisure Suit Larry to it.
01:31:35
Speaker
Yeah.
Controversial Games
01:31:37
Speaker
Yeah. Well, yeah. Put it below. Yeah. OK. Yeah. So it is James Paris is our new 58. All right. Next game.
01:31:49
Speaker
1315 by Gita Games 2013. It's called Lily Looking Through. Lily Looking Through. And it looks kind of cute. 2013 is also tough.
01:32:03
Speaker
A tough year for adventure games, to be honest with you. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like kind of coming back, but it wasn't quite there yet. It does look cute. It actually looks quite nice. Crowdfunded through Kickstarter. It looks like it got like a kind of like a sea average in terms of like the people who reviewed it on Steam, on Metacritic, on adventure gamers. Like everybody's like, ah, this game's fine.
01:32:26
Speaker
I do want to say this though, in 2013, 2013 through, I feel like 2016, it did feel like the adventure game community was hyper critical of new adventure games coming out. I actually found it very hard for, I think it might've been hard for devs to get back into this, you know, cause there were expectations set. So if you're trying to bring back the genre and you're only wanting at that time,
01:32:53
Speaker
ah You know, you're very classic games like Monkey Island, Grim Bendingo, King's Quest VI. You're not gonna get that, right? So i don't write I don't know how much to, I'm just saying at the time it was tough, you know? Okay, I'm gonna say two things about it. First, I want you to go to the ah Steam trailer. Uh-huh, I'm on it. And just watch it through. Okay. Every single scene,
01:33:21
Speaker
Lily is just falling down. It's like, it's like, oh, she's falling up. She's falling up. She's every scene. She just is falling down. It seems like all they want to show you about this game is it's a game about a girl who falls down from the sky, a bunch. Okay. Well, does look, nu I think it looks really, I think the animation's pretty good. they They do a good job of making her fall down. Look, she's falling down on ice. She's falling down in water. She's falling down in some like green miasma. She's falling down on a catapult. She's falling down on some grass. Oh, she's falling down when ah when a block falls beneath her. yeah Oh, she's got like a magical scarf and she's falling down with it. lying a little bit
01:34:07
Speaker
yeah Oh yeah, I guess she's flying there. flying um and but but i will askcar But I will also say this game is only 42 minutes long. Okay. Okay. And maybe that's why people were a little disappointed because for under an hour, that's rough. I,
Top Game Rankings Debate
01:34:26
Speaker
ah for a game that you're trying to really get into. Yeah. I could see that being disappointing again, same ah time and art that is subjective, but if you're something I could see that being disappointing.
01:34:38
Speaker
Yeah, I don't think a game needs to be long to be good. But it is something I guess, nah, I don't think we need to consider that now. I think we'd need to consider that if we were writing a review and like suggesting people spend their money on it, maybe? But I don't think we need to consider that here. Yeah, fuck that. So I don't know. I think here's what I'm thinking.
01:35:02
Speaker
very top level is this game is making me interested in the way Midnight Girl did. Sure. Where it's like, this doesn't look amazing, but it also has something interesting about it. um Where I don't think it would ever be my favorite game, but I think I'd kind of like to play it. That's fair. And I i agree. I do feel kind of the same way and I want to give it props for Um, looking very beautiful and intriguing as well.
Community Support and Creativity
01:35:34
Speaker
But I think I would put a below midnight girl. I would put a below midnight girl because I think midnight girl has more intrigued and more polished to even just the trailer. Yeah. But where would you put it, uh, in comparison to your favorite game related chapter one, everything is back.
01:35:51
Speaker
Oh God, let me remind myself. No, don't, don't remind yourself. I have to. I think we should just, I think what we need to do about related, everything ah chapter one, everything is back, is just rely on the fact that we can't remember anything about it.
01:36:05
Speaker
then it needs to go above. If I can't remember, then it needs to go above because I have a feeling that I will remember the aesthetic of this one. and You know? Okay, yeah, same. All right, 890 from 2007, Limbo of the Lost by Majestic Studios. It is, again, in the, ah it's appropriate that it's called Limbo because that is where adventure games were at the time. and yeah But roses, we have hit a fucking jackpot here. This is going real low. OK, it's horrible from the Wikipedia. It looks horrible. And from the Wikipedia entry. OK. Yeah. um On 11th.
01:36:49
Speaker
11 June 2008 game plasma posting an article showing certain places the limo lost where I ah were identical to the game elder squirrels for investigations of the game discovered environments and assets taken from numerous other games including dogs and World of Warcraft well the cursor was taken from black and white to Okay, it's the last, it's it's going to the last one. You understand, it has to. It's gotta go all the way down it. Okay, oh my god. This is a new low. If you have plagiarized anything, you are automatically at the end.
01:37:34
Speaker
and made it look this bad, it still looks this bad if you played it. Okay, ah June 2008, June 24th, in response to the shocking notification that some of the alleged unauthorized copyrighted material submitted by sources external to the development have been team have been found within the PC game, Limbo of the Lost, we, the development team, have given our consent and full cooperation to both publishers who are recalling all units from all territories, immediately. To our best of our knowledge, no one majestic G2 Games tricentergy knew about this infringement and knowingly played a part in it. This is majestic studios playing it. The people who made the game are like, hey, we didn't know we made it by stealing. Oh my god. On 30th of July, Tim Croucher and laris Lawrence Francis announced their departure from majestic studios with the following statement.
Support Resources
01:38:21
Speaker
Due to the behavior of certain members of the majestic studios team, Mr. T. Croucher and Mr. L. Francis would like to announce their departure and would like it known that they have severed all connections, ties, and licks with the remaining members of the majestic teams. Mr. Croucher would like it known that his input responsibility was so research, some vocal acting, and puzzle design. and Mr. Francis would like it known that is it that his input responsibility was opening music theme and intro music, character script writing for dark mayor, puzzle design, and voice acting. Neither Mr. Croucher nor Mr. Francis had any control over graphics rendering, coding, or game screen divine as far design. As far as both Mr. Croucher and Mr. Francis were aware, all submitted material was to be original. Oh my God. it ah It has to be last. It has to be. It's last. We're given this one, the flesh.
01:39:11
Speaker
ah Whoosh! Whoosh! We give it the flush! Limbo of the Lost by Majestic Studios! You are the worst adventure game of all time!
01:39:28
Speaker
Oh my god! What a revelation! ah Amazing. That we have discovered. Okay, so we have got two more. Go for it. Okay, all right. ah So we're gonna rush through the next two because we have gone way over time. ah Next one is Dr. Dumont's Wild, P-A-R-T, one. First row soft by first row software publishing in 1988. Oh my god.
01:39:55
Speaker
This is, oh, this is a text adventure. We could skip this one if you want, but it's called Dr. Dumont's Wild, P-A-R-T. With an I, yeah. Oh, I, yeah. Yeah. Gross and no thank you. Do you wanna just skip it? Yeah, we'll skip it. Okay, that's our only skip this episode. Because we skipped it, here's the last one. This is gonna be pretty, this is ridiculous. Okay. This is a 2009 game, or a 2011 game.
01:40:26
Speaker
by valve entertain what or you oh my god
01:40:37
Speaker
Well, clearly it has to go below Portal 1, right? I mean, right? I don't know. This is actually a very interesting discussion because I think Portal 1 is one of the most interesting games of all time. by People love Portal 2 as well, Valve though. Entertainment. Yeah, Portal 2 is a better written game with better puzzles and better characters and better story, but Portal 1 was such a...
01:41:05
Speaker
an explosive piece of art. Yeah, yeah, it was very innovative for the time. And it it just like blew people away. Nobody saw it coming. Nobody expected it. And then and Portal One was just an amazing thing. And that ending song is so fucking good. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, i' I've seen Jonathan Colton in concerts several times. I love Jonathan Colton. He's the fucking best. um So let's be fair then.
01:41:35
Speaker
Roses, this is what I'm afraid of. And I don't think we can get out of it. Okay. Our number one and our number two are going to be poor.
01:41:46
Speaker
No, no, no, no, no, no. We can't put Portal 2 up there. I mean, can't we? Are you kidding me? Yeah, I mean, Portal 2 is so good. Okay, I understand what you mean. Fine, put it up there. Fine, put it up there. You're mad.
01:42:00
Speaker
and it's but like this I'm upset about this too. I think it's fucking ridiculous that we are about to put Portal 2 and Portal 1 as our numbers 1 2, and I don't know which order they go in.
01:42:15
Speaker
but like What else can we do? Leave one as one and put this as two. And I think this is happening because, I think this is happening because we haven't gotten to some of the greats, right? So like, if, for example, if, um, if, uh, Monkey Island one came up, right? Oh, kicks both of them off. That would be number one, right? Or if Grim Fandango, that would be really high. That would be a four. Kick some both off. You're right. Even a Sierra, even like King's Quest.
01:42:44
Speaker
Yeah, I might be above portal one. I don't know. I would have to really think about it when it came up, but we have not gotten any. Sierra or LucasArts games besides Phantasmagoria. Right. That's why this is happening. We haven't gotten to those greats yet. So This is so stupid. It is so stupid that are number our top two games of the greatest adventure games of all time are both Portal games. I think it's funny though. I do too. But it is amazing. It is stupid and people are going to be mad at us on Instagram.
01:43:23
Speaker
Fine. Bring it. we Bring it. Fuckers. We'll give you. All right, man. OK, do you want to. but So before we say goodbye. Yes. Why don't you read our final list? We have added. We had it like 20 or 15 games to this, maybe.
01:43:45
Speaker
OK, let me bring up the list ah while I'm doing that. Would you like to tell the people about our network and where they can find us while I bring up this list? Sure. We are part of the adventure game hotspot network. There's all sorts of cool stuff on the network from a Space Quest historian to the adventure game geek.
01:44:03
Speaker
to One Short Eye, the Classic Gamers Guild. A bunch of really cool stuff. Cress up, you know, like a bunch of cool people, cool stuff. Go check it out at adventuregamehotspot.com. There's reviews, there's news. If you like adventure games, you should check it out. If you just like video games, there's gonna be cool stuff for you. We have an Instagram at save your game podcast.
01:44:32
Speaker
um on instagram.com, that's not how you plug in Instagram. um And you know great yeah ah you can email us at mattandroses at gmail dot.com and we love getting reviews on iTunes, on Spotify, and that rules.
01:44:50
Speaker
We love all that. In comics, we are so close to 100 reviews on Spotify. Oh, that's so cool. We are so, so close. I think we are at, ah we're at 98. So if two of you just want to hop on Spotify, review us. That makes me so happy. We would love it. That makes me so happy. We do, we're really, we don't have that many reviews on Apple, on on Apple podcast, but hey, whatever. All right, are you ready then?
01:45:20
Speaker
for this list. Oh my God. It's so insane already. Ready? it's Here we go. Yeah. Rapid fire. Number one, portal. Portal 2. Last Door, Season 1, Fran Bow, Papers Please, Pajamasam 2, Thunder and Lightning Aren't So Frightening. I'm going to drunk you that next time. Lamplight City and Bracelet, Cube Escape, The Lake, The Slaughter, Act 1, Phantasmagoria, Scratches, Dreamfall Chapters, Been There, Damn That, Clam Man, Amnesia Rebirth, Wave Tail, Midnight Girl, Lily Looking Through, Related Chapter 1, Everything is Back,
01:45:58
Speaker
I'm now questioning everything. The 20th best adventure game of all time. I'm so confused. All right. 21, the pawn, Agatha Christie and then there were none, Nancy Drew, ghost of Thornton Hall, Amos Green's final repose, last half of darkness beyond the spirit's eye, Byzantine the betrayal, murder she wrote, legend of hand, Ben Jordan, paranormal investigator, case seven,
01:46:22
Speaker
We were here forever, the will of Arthur Flabington, anachronist, many happy returns, mission critical, helly cyberpunk thriller, art of murder, cards of destiny, dark grim mariupolis, Baker Street breakouts, that's hard to say. A Sherlockian escape adventure sent in the seventh guest, a whisper in the twilight, the pony of doomsday,
01:46:45
Speaker
Mazovian adventure, krabat and the secret of the Sorefian king. I'm just going to say cosmonauts because I think that's what it is. Cosmonauts escape reality. Randall's Monday, Ankh, heart of Osiris. Again.
01:46:56
Speaker
Again. What is that? What is that? What is that? Okay. What is it? I don't remember anything called again. ah Elena displaced reality, astronomical, the quest for the edge of the universe, moons of madness, voyage, inspired by Jules Verne. That's Christian Anderson, the ugly Prince Tuckling. Violence, Minecraft story mode, five magical amulets.
01:47:22
Speaker
Batman partners in peril. Miyasmata, Blue Force, The Fan, James Paris II, the founder of a term of drunkenness, Wild Wireless, The Steel Assassin, The Crystal Key, Free DC, Mystery of the Nautilus, Of Light and Darkness, The Prophecy, Weird Truth and so is Stranger Than Fiction, and the worst adventure game of all time, Limbo of the Lost because plagiarism. Oh my god. We are the dumbest podcast that has ever existed. I think he did the best.
01:47:54
Speaker
and So, there's there i before we say goodbye, I do wanna have like a serious moment. ah This was fucking ridiculous and so much fun. yeah um But obviously, ah something really shitty happened between the last episode and now. um I know we have a lot of international listeners and even you guys are probably a little upset and worried. One thing I just, want I don't wanna get into the politics of it all, but I do wanna say,
01:48:23
Speaker
ah one thing we can all do, right? um if you can't If you can't trust your government, if you can't trust your courts, if you can't trust your police force or your army, right? The one thing you can trust is each other. And it is important now more than ever um to be kind, ah be understanding, be loving,
01:48:51
Speaker
not necessarily to the people who wish you didn't exist, but to the people who, ah you know, um people who are struggling just like you. And it is at this point with the platforms that some people have run on and won on just being kind and accepting of other people is an act of resistance.
01:49:20
Speaker
yeah um So I want you all to, one, know that you're safe with us, right? Maybe not with me, but that's a different thing altogether. We can sometimes act like assholes and ah be be be snarky, but we ah you know we accept all of you for who you are. yeah um not We won't always accept you ah for your beliefs, but you know ah we accept for you for who you are.
01:49:50
Speaker
and ah And we will do ah you know everything in our power, which isn't much, but everything in our power to to stand by you ah in those circumstances. And um I hope that you all do the same for each other. And the very last thing I'll say is take some time for yourself. ah There's a lot of fighting to do.
01:50:19
Speaker
in the next few years. um And you can't do that if you don't get some rest, if you don't take time to enjoy life, if you don't find ways to compartmentalize and then and be happy. yeah um If you don't do those things, you just won't be able to help other people.
01:50:42
Speaker
um
01:50:45
Speaker
That's all I wanted to say. ah do you have ah you don't You don't have to, but if there's anything you want to add. No, no, I have to. I'm kidding. Thank you so much for saying that. That echoes a lot of what I would already say. But I also want to say if you are a creative and you're struggling now to make art, this is the best time to make art. I think art is a lot of lot of the times an act of resistance as well. um Just the ability to be able to create. And if you are not the creative type,
01:51:16
Speaker
ah know that I will be creating stuff for you to, to help you through and my channel pushing up roses, my channel has always been a welcoming space for everybody. um You know, especially, ah ah especially minorities and people in the queer community, I am a part of the queer community as well. So I'm on your side. And you know, yeah, my writer, she wrote videos aren't going to save the world. Yeah, yeah, or not. I get that. But if they can give you some comfort, even just that brief comfort so that you can keep going. That is the most important part. The most important part is just to be here. And I know that sounds trite, but as somebody who has
01:51:59
Speaker
ah multiple times survived, um, ah suicide, uh, attempts and overdoses. The important part is to be here because if you're not, then it is nothing, right? So yeah, I, I were, we here at savior game are here for you. Even we don't, if you can't do it, if you can't fight, that is okay. ah What we need, what we need from you is to just.
01:52:29
Speaker
survive just to live and survive and be here. ah Without you, even, again, even if you're not fighting, even if you do not have the energy to fight, without you, our cause is weakened, right? Our world is a little worse. So please just hang on and know that, you know, like everything else, this too,
01:52:56
Speaker
will pass and i just i the last thing I wanna say, I wanna support the ah the resource PFLAG has some really good resources, pflag dot.org. They have a lot of good crisis intervention hotlines. For example, the Trans Lifeline um is, and I'll just say the number right here is 877-565-8860. The LGBT National Hotline is 888-843-4564. And there's a bunch more resources on pflag dot.org. So we're not going to dwell in this. We'll make jokes about it here and there. We'll yell about it here and there. but
01:53:38
Speaker
um
01:53:41
Speaker
This isn't, we're not going to dedicate every show to the absolute despair we're feeling right now, but also we're going to try not to dwell in despair. We're going to try to again, fucking enjoy life, make art, be kind to each other. And when we need to fight, we'll be ready to fight. Absolutely. Thank you, Matt. Thank you for saying that. Yeah.
01:54:04
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. Please stay safe, you guys. And, um. And play some good fucking video games. It's a great time for that, honestly. Yeah. I know sometimes it's hard when things are hard to allow yourself to enjoy something, but, but allow yourself, please. Yeah. you What do you mean? Allow yourself to do that. What are we fighting for? If not that? Honestly. Yeah. For real. We're fighting so that we can find contentment in things. So if you can find it, allow, allow yourself to do that.
01:54:33
Speaker
And even this idea of like, Oh, so other, other people are suffering worse than I am. So I don't have the luxury of relaxing. I have to do it, dedicate all my time. You aren't going to be able to do that. but If you don't take some time to enjoy life and you don't even know, you won't even know what they like. If I'm fighting for somebody else, somebody else's happiness, I can't have any context for what I'm trying to strive for for them. and If I don't take time to make myself happy, I know it's counterintuitive, but Yeah, you cannot fight other people's fire if you're setting yourself on fire. You know what I mean? Yeah, what a great point, yes. ah yeah So we need you here, we need you enjoying life, and we need you to be kind to each other. Okay, we've said it, we've said it in it in seven different ways in the past five minutes. um But it's just, if we don't say it now, ah we'll regret it and... Yeah.
01:55:31
Speaker
Anyway, play some good fun. Go play Rise of the Golden Idol, everybody. That's what I do. Yeah, me too. ah Roses, do you have anything? at there's There can't be anything left to say. There is, actually. Really? And I can't believe that you would forget. I thought we were on- Hold on, ami let me look through my notes.
01:55:54
Speaker
Put your notes down. No, I've got to have it here. Uh, let me know when you find it. It should be on a, put it should be on a little post it. I think you wrote it down. So if you just find the post it and say it, a post here that says buy milk. I don't even drink like regular milk. Why?
01:56:14
Speaker
Anyway, podcasts is art. Oh, artists suffer. Don't buy milk, so gross. It's gross. It's really gross.