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Military Youth Ministry — Beth Mabry
37 Plays14 days ago
Beth Mabry has been involved with Cadence student ministries for over two decades, serving military youth in Germany, Okinawa, Japan, and now on mainland Japan.
As a former military child herself, she discusses the unique aspects of ministering to American youth stationed overseas with their parents.
Learn more about Cadence's ministry to the military: https://cadence.org/
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Transcript
Introduction and Podcast Setup
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to In Cadence, where we talk about what it looks like to share the gospel in our lives with the military community. Join us as we talk about what God is doing in the lives of our service members and how we can be a part of it.
00:00:24
Speaker
Welcome back to Cadence. Hutch, good to be back with you and another chance to have a fun conversation with one of our favorites, In Cadence.
00:00:34
Speaker
We are actually in three different locations for this recording. last ah Last podcast when we were with Kenji, all three of us sitting in one room, recording studio, soundproof walls, everything.
00:00:47
Speaker
And now we're in three different locations. Hutch is in Chicago, I'm in Denver, and our guest, Beth Mabry, is in Japan.
Beth Mabry's Background
00:00:55
Speaker
But we really wanted to get this podcast recorded because of April being the month of the military child and because of what Beth is doing in her ministry to military children. So we're excited to be able to have her join us and get to hear more stories about what's going on in Japan with military kids.
00:01:15
Speaker
Beth, it's great to have you here. I know we've shared a lot of ministry over the years and less than we'd like to. We've nearly overlapped a number of times more than we've probably actually worked together. But um I've learned a lot from you over the years and how you've um just cared for families and the kind of ministry you've done. So I'm really looking forward to this
Military Childhood Experiences
00:01:41
Speaker
conversation. This is going be fun. But tell us a little bit about you first. Let's just get you introduced a bit. um How long have you been with Cadence? Give us a little bit of your background and how you ended up as a Cadence missionary.
00:01:54
Speaker
I have been connected with Cadence about the last 20 years in different capacities. um I started as a volunteer, served as an intern, and then became a full-time staff. um But little just a little about my story, um I grew up in the military. My dad served in the Air Force. um He did a full 30-year career, and so it's the life that i grew up in and and know well.
Journey to Japan and Ministry Involvement
00:02:18
Speaker
um kind of the typical military family. and We moved around a lot when I was younger. So I started the fourth grade in my third school, third state.
00:02:27
Speaker
um But then we sat in one place. We sat in Grand Forks, North Dakota for 11 years. um Just kind of an odd assignment that we just kept staying there, but we enjoyed it. It was in my sophomore year of college that my dad got an assignment out of the blue to Okinawa, Japan. and um I asked my parents if I could tag along, even though I was in college. I thought it wasn't fair that they finally got a fun assignment um after suffering 11 North Dakota winters. um So I asked if I could tag along for a year just to have an experience of living abroad.
00:03:02
Speaker
And they said yes. And so when I got to Okinawa, um I was going to college to be a teacher. And so I started subbing in the schools on base. um And then I also got connected volunteering at a Cadence youth group.
00:03:16
Speaker
And the more I spent time in the classroom and the more I spent time with the youth group, and the more I just really fell in love with youth ministry. I loved the conversations you got to have um in the classroom. There is always a pressure of needing to accomplish lots of things. And so getting to take time and slow down and just get to talk to students really loved just the idea of youth ministry.
Connection with Military Kids
00:03:38
Speaker
And so from there, um I interned and then I joined Cadence full-time. I love it. Well, and so much of your story being as a military kid, then turning around and working with military families, there were probably things that you were aware of and could see going on that maybe others couldn't. What are some of those things that you just naturally connect with or naturally pick up on as a military kid? They're kind of unique to your experience.
00:04:07
Speaker
Yeah. Um, I think it's kind of funny. I remember in high school, um being just done with the military life. Because as I shared, we sat at a base for a long time. um and so I was constantly having people come and go. And where I lived, we we attended school on base through middle school. But when we got into high school, they would bus us into the nearby town to go to school. And in the summer between my eighth and ninth grade year, most of my friends had moved. And so here I was starting high school, not having moved, but not having any friends that I'm launching into high school with. And so I remember getting into high school and, know, getting involved in things. And I started hearing people share stories from, hey remember in first grade when we did this? Or remember in third grade, we did that.
00:04:54
Speaker
And I had this like thought of people actually know each other like for a long time. And I became really jealous of that. Like I was sad that I didn't have roots and like long lasting friends. um And so i remember having this conversation with the Lord in high school thinking, like, I never want to do anything with the military.
00:05:14
Speaker
Once I'm, you know, graduated, once I'm an adult, then I get to choose. I'm done with this military life and I'm done moving. Like, I want to stay in North Dakota for the rest of my life. Like, I just wanted roots somewhere. um And so it's really funny now to look back. And I've moved internationally now several times and I've spent nearly my entire adult life living overseas. um And so it's kind of fun to see how the Lord has redeemed
Empathy and Storytelling
00:05:39
Speaker
those things. But when I got to Okinawa and I became a substitute teacher and started working with these students, um I realized in high school because I tried to avoid military kids, most of my friends didn't know what I was going through. And so most of my friends didn't have dads that would deploy or living af far away from relatives.
00:05:58
Speaker
And so I just didn't have someone to connect with on that level. um And so when I started working with kids and they were talking about just the stress that their family felt because their dad was deployed. or the stress that they felt because their grandparents couldn't be at their things or their aunts and uncles weren't a part of their everyday life.
00:06:14
Speaker
All of a sudden I realized like, these are my people. Like I have avoided you all of a lot of my life, but you're my people. And I know what that's like. And it just was really healing. it was, I think God redeemed my heart um or just my story with military, like the challenges that come with that. But also just getting to realize the the fun parts of military life, like um the different people that God provided for my family. um We have kind of fill in aunts and uncles and and cousins, you know, just the the friends that we made along the way um really added to our life. They they were encouraging and supportive. Um,
00:06:54
Speaker
and And the Lord just really has provided. And so um so when it comes to like connecting with military kids, like I know what it's like um when dads are gone, you know, and moms are trying to to hold down the fort and, you know your dad deploys at least three things always break. So you have neighbors that come over and fix those things and fix the car. But you just kind of get to live life with people. And the Lord is faithful to bring people alongside that.
00:07:20
Speaker
um It doesn't always feel like you're you're alone in that. The Lord provides. I love that. um Love hearing how God has redeemed your story and used so many parts of it. Do you find that you're sharing your story often with kids and that it's a connecting point for you? How does that a part how is that a part of your your ministry? Yeah, i I think it is fun to connect. I think everybody's stories are a little different. So I don't want to walk in and say, oh, I know just how you're feeling because everybody's are a little different. um But it is a connecting piece because I think sometimes, you know,
00:07:58
Speaker
I've noticed that people in the military, like you don't necessarily want to share all the hard stuff. Like you want to kind of put on a face of like, I can do this. where we're We're having fun. We're doing this. We're doing this. And so to sometimes admit that things are hard um feels like you're not doing it right or it's not easy enough. And so to be able to voice things like, hey, this is hard. I experienced this Is this something that you experience too? And it sometimes helps give kids words for it or to know that there's nothing wrong with them, that they're feeling that way. Like they're not a failure. They're not weak. Those are common things that, that we do deal with and it's okay to voice those um and just invite the Lord into those that we don't have to do those on our own.
Role in Youth Ministry
00:08:40
Speaker
um But that the Lord can, can step in and it's not a sign of weakness to get to share the struggle and the hardship. That's great. And just for the context of our listeners, um like what age groups are you working with? What does it look like doing ministry? Because, you know, for a lot of ah those who aren't military, our our only frame of reference might be a youth pastor in a church the U.S. In what ways is it similar? In what ways is it different?
00:09:08
Speaker
um It's really similar. So i work directly with the chapel here on base. um I lead what they call the Protestant Youth of the Chapel, called the PYOC. In true military fashion, we have an acronym for our for our ministry. Absolutely. But the chapel has invited Cadence in to lead um our youth ministry. On Sunday mornings, we gather for for worship at the chapel. And then Sunday afternoons, I hold a youth group for middle school and high school students. And so um kind of like in pretty traditional average youth group, we meet each week. And then on Wednesdays, we do a community dinner. um And so again, middle school and high school students gather just for a time of fellowship um and having dinner with one another. Kind of our entry point into our ministry, kids invite their friends And we just get to enjoy, enjoy food together, play a few games, and then hopes that they they trickle in then back on Sundays for more biblical teaching.
Community-Based Outreach
00:10:05
Speaker
There's one middle school on base and one high school on base. And we're kind of in the small, it's kind of a smaller base, about five to 7,000 people.
00:10:13
Speaker
think there's about 800 middle school and high school students on this base. um And so it's, it's fun that they all attend one school primarily. But I'm at the school, I get invited to you know, games or concerts, recitals. And so throughout the week, um meeting students in the food court for for coffee, um going to their special events, but more of a community-based ministry. We do have some students that don't attend chapel anywhere, um but they come because their friends invite them and they're looking for something to do.
00:10:46
Speaker
And so in many ways, it's quite a captive audience. Um, but very much so like a traditional youth youth ministry, um but more of a community-based ministry.
00:10:58
Speaker
Talk a little bit more about that. What what does it mean to be a community-based ministry? What are some of the may practices that might be normal when you're engaged with the whole community versus a singular church that's a part of a community? what What does that community ministry look like and what are some of the unique benefits of it?
00:11:18
Speaker
I think for like a community-based ministry, our our chaplains do phenomenal work. and We have five chaplains, five or six chaplains on this base. And, um, In addition to leading Sunday services, you know, they're out doing unit engagement. They're they're doing all sorts of stuff, um connecting with people that in the military community, the chapel is still really seen um as a very trustworthy place. Anytime there's a need for things, they say, hey, contact your chaplain. If you need this, contact your chaplain. Chaplains can step in. And so I love that I get to work alongside the chaplains because, know, Their focus is often on the active duty on the military members um or even helping out with spouses as well.
00:12:00
Speaker
um And so to get to step in and fill the gap where there's youth needs, um I love that I can walk into the school and say, hey, I am the chapel youth director. And so the fact that I'm attached to the chapel, that already carries um weight with it. um It's seen as a trustworthy community.
00:12:18
Speaker
um entity. And so it it gives me the ability to to go to different community events, or sometimes they have community fairs, different resources for families.
00:12:28
Speaker
And so I'm often seen as as a resource. um If there's a family in need and a chaplain is working with them, they can say, hey, you know what your kid could meet with our youth director. And so in terms of a community, it's not that we're tied to one specific service or one specific church. um It's really a community spiritual resource. And so we're going to have people that just, they want to just talk. And so they can, they can come there. They don't have to be a church attender.
00:12:58
Speaker
Um, But we're seen as like a great, great resource. And so I'm pulling kids, sometimes even um kids attend church off base with their families, but there's not a youth group at that church. And so I'm connected with a few of them and they just will say, hey, Beth is leading a youth group. Go go and attend her youth group because we just don't have enough kids at our at our youth group right now. um To my knowledge, there's no other youth ministries in this community. um There's definitely space for more youth ministries. I wish that there were more youth ministries because 800 students is just a lot of kids to reach.
00:13:32
Speaker
um But it's a great network of um we get to just love students. one of the things i think about just from our times of doing ministry together um is how intentional you were in showing up in the lives of kids. So you talk about there's one school, one middle school, one high school, one sports team. Talk about just that ministry of presence that comes ah in such a strong way in the military community.
00:13:59
Speaker
Yeah. um Every fall in September, I do a parents night at youth group where I invite parents to come in and get to experience what we do. And during that time, i i just share a little bit of vision for our for our families of of why our ministry exists. And um I always tell them like, I want to be at your kids things. I want to come. The ministry is way more than what we do on Sundays and Wednesdays. But I would love to be present at your kids' stuff. and And just recognizing that students here, especially overseas bases, we are miles away from any extended family.
00:14:35
Speaker
And so um I like to just tell families, like, I'll be the extra person. Like, I'll cheer your kid on in the stands. I'll be the fill-in aunt. Like I would love to do that. And so um last school year, I remember sharing that with with a parent or at the parents meeting. And I looked back and there was a mom actually kind of tearing up. And she came up afterwards. She goes, do you do you really want to be at all of these things? I said, yes, yes, I do.
00:14:59
Speaker
And so every quarter she would send me a schedule of all the things that she knew that was going on. She was a part of the PTO. And so it's finding the right moms um that that know all the, that get all the emails And so um I've got ah had a chance to go to sports stuff that's since moving to Yokota. I've expanded a few things that I've gotten to go to. I've been to a robotics competition now, which I knew nothing about. And I realized not many people show up at robotics competitions.
School and Chapel Engagement
00:15:26
Speaker
And so the kids were so excited that I knew nothing and they explained everything to me. It was really great. Yeah. I had a chance to be a juror member in a mock trial that some of my students were competing in um But it just was really fun. um You know, every winter showing up at the first middle school band concert.
00:15:44
Speaker
um I've had parents say, why why? are you here? We don't. This is not going to be a good concert. We're not sure we want to be here. um But it's wonderful. I love getting to show up. and be at things like that. And um i think for parents, when they when they see that their kids are being cared for, it it um encourages them as well. Like they they feel cared for knowing that their their kids are being seen and not forgotten.
00:16:10
Speaker
And Beth, I'm sure there are some events that are not as exciting to go to as others. And yet I've heard you tell a story before of when you were in high school, you ah what it meant when your dad couldn't come to an event. Would you share that story? Sure. um as i As I mentioned, ah my dad is in the Air Force and and he deployed a fair amount over the years and um When when nine eleven happened, that was my senior year of high school. And shortly after that, my dad deployed for for a bit of time. And um i just remember leading into my senior year or my senior volleyball season, um you know, they do all the the recognizing nights, the senior nights. And My dad wasn't going to be there for that. And I was feeling disappointed about that. My mom was there. um And um when it got time for the gathering time, I saw my dad's commander standing near my mom and he was in his blues. He had dressed up for it and he stood in my dad's place. And it just meant a lot to me. um
00:17:14
Speaker
To feel seen and cared for knowing that even though my dad was serving overseas during that time, um somebody was willing to stand in. And it was somebody that we knew well. He was he was a friend of the family, um but he didn't have to give up a night. He was a base man or he was a commander. He had plenty of other things he could be doing, but he he chose to. to come and stand with my family in my dad's place. And so I love um that I get to do that, that when parents are deployed or just even aunts and uncles that can't be there, I love getting to to return that.
00:17:50
Speaker
Love that. That's so cool to hear. i'm I'm also curious about your relationship with ah school administrators. What does that look like? Are you, do you have an opportunity to, like, what's what's the relationship with the principals and that look like? um it'll It'll vary. um Just like our military folks that move in and out, um school administrators do as well.
00:18:15
Speaker
oh It's an easy place to start to look around your chapel service to see what teachers are in the in the room. And so connecting with them, getting to know teachers. But oftentimes um the schools will host different resource things for students, or it'll be different experience months of like couple school years ago, the the school put on healthy relationships and they were just, they brought in a lot of different um base resources, mental health and different places to come in and just be present in the school. And so the chapel was invited to that. And so the chapel asked, Hey, we've got a call from the school. Would you be willing to go and man the chapel booth? And so I had an opportunity to go and be at the school for that. um
00:19:02
Speaker
And so I, It really just depends. um Because I work directly for the chapel, it's easy to call up the school and say, hey, I work at
Community Building on Military Bases
00:19:11
Speaker
the chapel. Is there anything I can do? And so, so far, um I've had a good opportunity to do that. I can be present for school lunches. um as well. um They always need extra help in the cafeterias to to go and kind of be an extra body in there.
00:19:27
Speaker
um And so especially at a smaller base like this where we just have the two schools, it's kind of like a small town. I get to know a lot of the different teachers and coaches through things.
00:19:37
Speaker
um and And so for right now, I've got a great season to do that. um Schools seem usually seem pretty excited about adults that want to be in their schools to be helpful.
00:19:49
Speaker
Um, so it's, it's a good, good relationship. It's such a great thing to have that kind of community where everyone's looking for resources to help. Like there, there is a scarcity, um, in a lot of military communities, especially overseas, uh, that's felt more significantly. And think that leads to the opportunities you're talking about, but it just an increased fruitfulness, um,
00:20:16
Speaker
But no matter where you're at, I mean, even you talk about being in North Dakota and God redeeming things in your heart, you get to be witness to how God is working all these circumstances together in the lives of these kids. And you get to give voice to that. You get to give words to that. um And you get to encourage these kids in their walk with with Jesus. And tell us, I don't know if you have a story or two, but are there just times that you've been able to be a witness to God's work in redeeming um the life and the heart of students and families? are there Are there a couple stories that you're just excited about, would love to share?
00:20:54
Speaker
think not every family... is super excited about moving overseas. um Japan right now has been one of the top tourist destinations.
00:21:05
Speaker
um if you look at statistics, people are just real excited to visit Japan right now. um But for many families, this is their first overseas time. Like they weren't looking to move overseas. And so it can be a really rough transition. um can feel really isolating to all sudden be in the world's biggest city. There's 37 million people that live here. I'm in the Tokyo area. And so it can feel really overwhelming for families.
00:21:30
Speaker
And so a couple of things I like to do is just i've I've been here long enough that trains aren't as scary anymore. And I've kind of figured out how you can order food that looks familiar. um And so it's fun just to take new students that maybe feel a little overwhelmed and in their families and just go for a train ride and um go out for restaurants. There's restaurants here that deliver food on robots or on conveyor belts. That's super fun and exciting and cutting edge. And so having an opportunity to to help ease people
00:22:03
Speaker
into living overseas and find some fun things. um I think living overseas can really build kind of two ways I see people go either it can be isolating that everything feels overwhelming. So I'm just, you know, not going to, to get out and do anything. And then there's people that come with like a bucket list to do everything. And it's just hard even to connect with them because they're always on the go trying to hit up all the spots. And so we kind of are left with this, like, how do we build community while we live somewhere cool?
00:22:32
Speaker
um And so helping people on one foot to to step outside, um to get out and enjoy God's creation. and there's beautiful mountains and all sorts of cool things around here that are just just beautiful creation, helping people get out. But then also getting people to realize like, hey, you need people in your life. You can't just travel every single weekend. um on your own, like you need to be a part of community. And so ah kind of helping families um maybe find that balance.
Passion for Work in Japan
00:23:00
Speaker
And so they stay connected to good community. Those have been some of the most fun times for me when I think about getting to share life and ministry.
00:23:08
Speaker
How long have you lived there? um I've been in Yokota for the last four years. And how long in Japan total? um The last 10 years.
00:23:22
Speaker
What keeps you there? um a lot of things. I love what I do. um i regularly tell kids that I think I have the best job in the world. And um i I think just growing up in the military, like it feels normal to me. It's what's familiar.
00:23:42
Speaker
um But there's also just, there's not another youth ministry here. And so I love being here. I would love for there to be more youth workers here to share that with. um But I love getting to be a presence for students to to know the gospel and feel like they belong to something.
Resilience and Belonging of Military Kids
00:24:02
Speaker
um And so that that really does keep me here. Love it. And as we wind down our time, I'm just curious with the being month of the military child, if you were to share with people who've never been around the military and there's just a couple of things you'd want them to know about military kids, what are some of the redeeming things um that military kids ah that come up, come about from being a military kid? Yeah. Military kids are my favorite. um I think they're the best,
00:24:36
Speaker
best group to work with for lots of reasons. um I think military kids are adventurous. um they They have to get out and move around. um You know, they didn't sign up to be in the military, their parents did. And so they're along for the ride. And sometimes that's really fun. You get to live in cool places that you really like. Sometimes that's hard. um you get to learn how to endure, um but you get to live in different places and meet different people. And so I think of all the different people I've met over the course of my life, um it's only because of the military. um You get to cross paths with lots of different cultures and backgrounds. And even this year, we did a Friendsgiving at our youth dinner. And one girl sat down with her plate and she said, I've never had a casserole.
00:25:27
Speaker
and I said, you've never eaten a casserole. She goes, no, I haven't. And so she had tried sweet potato casserole and a few other casseroles for the first time in her life. And um it's just fun getting to have ah new experiences and shared experiences with people. um I absolutely love that. ah Military kids, because they know they only have two to four years in a place, um they dive in deeply and quickly um because they they want to have friends. They're desperate to have friends. um And so it's...
00:25:57
Speaker
it's It's never hard to get a military kid talking you know about the places they've lived or the foods they like or don't like, um that they they adapt well. um And they're they're fun. they They have experiences. When you're talking you know about history or even you know as we read through the Bible and and different stories, many of them have lived there.
00:26:18
Speaker
in historically significant places. you know they've They've been to Rome or they've been across Germany to different you know church history sites. And so it's it's really fun to get them talking about their experiences.
00:26:31
Speaker
They're hungry for something deeper. They have to wrestle with hard things because they know that current events impact their families. They know that um their mom or dad um is going to be impacted about by things that go on in the world. And so they they do wrestle with those things. Um, and so to have a chance to, um, get to share truth with them, for them to feel settled, um, is really an honor. It's a fun thing to get to do.
00:27:00
Speaker
Um, but I think one of the messages that I just love sharing with students is it can feel like you don't belong anywhere because they move around kind of lily patterns as they go different places, um, that they might pick up certain things in certain locations, um,
00:27:16
Speaker
but it can feel like you don't belong anywhere. One of the hardest questions you can ask a military kid is where are you from? And is, is it where I've lived the longest? Is it where my grandparents live? Is it where we're a resident of, um, some kids have no idea, you know, where their parents are residents of. Um, and so one of the things that just has always spoke to me as a military kid is knowing that, um heaven is our ultimate home and that Jesus is the friend that doesn't move. you know, he moves with us where we go. um And so that's that's just a truth. It sounds really simple to say and maybe even a little cheesy. um
00:27:54
Speaker
but it really does communicate great truth to students um that they belong in our group. And so even when they move around, um my hope is that they they get connected in with with a good church, a good youth group where they feel like they have a sense of belonging um because I think that's that's really what students in general, I don't think that's unique to military kids. All teens wanna feel like they belong somewhere, um but for military kids, that certainly does. get a little challenging when they don't don't know what to call home. And so it's my hope that they call the Lord home.
Conclusion on Faith and Community
00:28:30
Speaker
that's so good. And so encouraging. I think it's a reminder for all of us that we can we can find our home in other things. And just the wisdom of your experience, ah your life as a military kid and and now ministering to them.
00:28:44
Speaker
um Just here hear your heart, hear the wisdom, hear the truth in what you're saying. It's so good. It's such a refreshing reminder, I think, for all of us. So thank you. Thanks for taking some time with us today.