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The Cadence Way - We Stay
61 Plays5 months ago
Brian and Dave chat with Darrow and Vicki Frazier, who have been longtime fixtures of ministry at Camp Hansen in Okinawa, Japan. The group discusses the principle of "staying" in a military community that is so transient by nature.
Learn more about Cadence: https://cadence.org/
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Transcript
Introduction and Guest Overview
00:00:00
Speaker
Welcome to In Cadence, where we talk about what it looks like to share the gospel in our lives with the military community. Join us as we talk about what God is doing in the lives of our service members and how we can be a part of
00:00:25
Speaker
Today we are joined with Daryl and Vicki Frazier. And I just got to tell you, the listener, i feel bad for you that you're just joining now because we've been having fun. We've been laughing and enjoying getting set up for this.
00:00:37
Speaker
And so it makes me all the more excited to hear from Daryl and Vicki today. And we're excited to even think about what it means to be a part of a cadence culture that stays in transient military communities.
Missionary Journey in Okinawa
00:00:49
Speaker
But to get us going, Darrell and Vicki, would you introduce yourselves, how you got connected to Cadence, and if you got some military background and connections in your history? Yeah, well, I'm Darrell.
00:01:01
Speaker
And I'm Vicki. And we are at Camp Hanson here in Okinawa, Japan. we Got connected with Cadence in 2010. were appointed as missionaries.
00:01:17
Speaker
And the first place that we came to was Camp Hanson in 2012. And we were just supposed to be short-term fill-ins. We weren't here to be staying. However, things happened.
00:01:30
Speaker
And we ended up coming back here and we've been here full-time since September of 2014. So about 10 years full-time here, active and participating with the chapel and with the Marines.
00:01:43
Speaker
How did we get connected with Cadence? When I was in the military station in Germany, we went to a Cadence house in Germany, as well as when I deployed down to Vicenza, Italy, i also went to the hospitality house there.
00:01:59
Speaker
And so that is how we got connected with Cadence. And then after I left the military, God called us back into it about five years later and to check with Cadence.
00:02:11
Speaker
and see if we were a fit. Yeah, that's great. And Vicki, Jazzercise has a little bit of influence on this story too, doesn't it?
00:02:21
Speaker
Well, when we moved to Germany, it was it was not easy ah to be a military spouse, to be in a foreign country, and everything changed. Jobs, cars, life, houses,
00:02:34
Speaker
I'd never been around the military community. Daryl was raised in it. His dad did over 30 years.
Life at Camp Hanson
00:02:40
Speaker
He was born on a military base, grew up. It was totally foreign to me. Germany was foreign. Military was foreign. It was all foreign. And we, you know, were going to just live in our lives down there. And I went to a jazzercise class at an army base that doesn't even exist anymore.
00:02:57
Speaker
And I'm... just walked in the door and this woman makes a beeline for me. And she says, Hey, would you like to come to a Bible study? And I'm like, sure.
00:03:08
Speaker
and I started going and studying the Bible for the first time in my life. And then told Darrow about it and he started to come. And that was a long way away from our house. So we found something closer to our house so we could study the Bible together. And that's where we found that, that cadence house.
00:03:25
Speaker
You guys have been in at Camp Hanson for 10 years. Do you guys, i don't know if you know the exact number of years, but but how long has that house been there? ah This house started in 1969. So where what we usually will tell people is we're just the latest missionaries here.
00:03:42
Speaker
Cadence has had this house here since 1969. So for 54 years. And we're just like we said, the the latest missionaries. I don't know if we're the longest ones that have ever been here. We know it's pretty close to that as far as at this particular house, because we do have a drawer here with all the different people who have come through here.
00:04:02
Speaker
yeah, We just see that all the blessings that that God has done through this house. We've even actually had a couple of older officers who have come back through here that knew one of the previous ones with the Arliskuses and them that they actually knew and came to the house when they were here for the five years that they were at this location. And they came back and now they're really good friends of ours as well.
00:04:31
Speaker
That's fun. That's great. And will you guys tell us a little bit about the military culture there? Family, singles, what's it made up? How's it made up? ah Camp Hansen is predominantly ah unaccompanied or single single people ah that are up here. 90% are men.
00:04:51
Speaker
So we have a good 10% women
Building Community in a Transient World
00:04:53
Speaker
over here. If you are married and you're stationed here, you're going to be living further south from us, either 40-minute drive, an hour drive. So the people that predominantly come to Camp Hansen Hospitality House here are going to be your single, mostly younger enlisted people.
00:05:12
Speaker
A lot of, most of the people we meet, it's their very first deployment. It's their very first duty station. They just came to the fleet. So those are the people that primarily come to our house. That's great. And you guys have built such such deep relationships as the community has moved around you over those 10 years. And that's that's um part of what we want to talk about today. We've been talking about the Cadence way and those distinctives of what Cadence does and and why we've had thriving ministry for
00:05:46
Speaker
54 plus years and more in our communities. And and so really because the military community is so mobile and transient, we really want to offer stability and strength and consistency over the long haul, not just through our individual missionaries like you guys staying there 10 years, but then in our ministry locations that are there for 50, 60, even more.
00:06:09
Speaker
So tell us a little bit about that transient nature of the military, how you're experiencing it there Camp Hansen, and even give us some reflections on it from your time in service, Daryl.
00:06:21
Speaker
Well, when I was in the military, i was, as as I said earlier, I was actually, the war was going on. So Bosnia was going on. I was stationed in Germany and i was not in Germany my last year, basically.
00:06:39
Speaker
I was i was gone for my I was there on a three years assignment. And my last year, I was pretty much gone for the Bosnia War, whether I was deployed in Italy or whether I was traveling around other locations that I can't tell.
00:06:55
Speaker
because I'm not even sure where they all were, then, then, you know, it is that we are, the military community is always gone. And even here at Camp Hanson, we have what we call UDP, which is a deployed personnel, unit deployed personnel.
00:07:13
Speaker
And we receive three of those at different times throughout the year and they're only here for six months.
Supporting Chaplains and Maintaining Ministry Stability
00:07:21
Speaker
So they're gonna come from Camp Pendleton, they're gonna come from Camp Lejeune, they're gonna come from 29 Palms and they're only here for six months.
00:07:30
Speaker
And they're only on island during that time for about three to four of those months because then they're out around other parts of Asia doing what they're here for and that's deployed to be a deterrent against the enemies that might come um and want to take part in nefarious acts, say to say.
00:07:55
Speaker
Yeah. So ah another ah part of the people that we have here are, they're stationed here for two to three years. When we first moved here, they were only stationed here for two years and now they're doing three years.
00:08:09
Speaker
um It was interesting that when we first, I i remember this one, ah couple of guys that we met and they hated it here. When we met them, they were being bullied in their units.
00:08:21
Speaker
They were kind of Maybe a little awkward guys. I don't know. But we enjoyed them immensely. They were a lot of fun. And so they came to our house and it was it was kind of strange that after five or six months of being here and in this community, they decided to extend.
00:08:38
Speaker
So instead of just going two years and leaving, it they decided to put in paperwork to see if they could stay another year. And it it was interesting how many men that we met who hated it here.
00:08:51
Speaker
and as soon as they got plugged into this community, extended. So that was really neat to see that this house was having that kind of impact on people's lives, that they went from hating their life to loving it and loving it in the Lord. i mean, i think that when you meet the Lord,
00:09:07
Speaker
And he, the way he puts people together, these unique individuals were then friends with the cool guys, you know, i mean, if you wanted to go back to high school, but you still kind of see that in our house. And it was fun to see kind of the nerdy, geeky guy being best friends with the jock.
00:09:26
Speaker
And now, you know, five years after we met these people, they're still the best of friends. And that's what the Lord does. He brings unique people together because we're together in him.
00:09:38
Speaker
Vicki, I appreciate the way you finished that there because us odd and awkward guys, we do prefer to be called unique. So ah thank you for that. But is it what a great testimony to what they experience in Christian community when they're a part of your your hospitality house and joining in on that. That's a beautiful picture.
00:10:00
Speaker
One of the, I mean, when you talk about ah military people being there for only a couple of years, that that includes chaplains as well. I'm curious in what ways your guys' stability, your being there year in, year out as chaplains come and go, how how is that a blessing to them and their ministries to know you guys, to get to know you and and your experience of the military community there?
00:10:24
Speaker
Well, during our time here, we've had over 10 chaplains. So even though they might come here for two or three years, because if they bring their family, there'll be a three-year assignment.
00:10:35
Speaker
For whatever reason, they end up only being at Hanson for about a year, maybe a little longer. And that's about it. And so we've had over 10 chaplains. And then that that includes our base chaplains.
00:10:47
Speaker
But we also get all of those UDP chaplains that come here as well. That's so that we help them in their in their deployments because they might have to go somewhere on a deployment. But all of their thousand men that come.
00:11:03
Speaker
don't all leave the island at the same time. And so they have a place that they can come to and that they can reference them to and send them to. And we get to know the chaplains really well.
00:11:14
Speaker
And so it's just been a benefit for the chaplains. And then when they come, especially the UDP ones, they know that the other chaplain that just left usually tells them, hey,
00:11:28
Speaker
The Hans Christian is there. The Frasers are there, meet them at the chapel and then go to their house. And they tell them before they even arrive. And so it's it's a blessing to the men that are coming and the few women, because usually the the deployed units are all infantry. So there's hardly any women in those units.
00:11:49
Speaker
And so but the women do come and Vicki gets to sow into their lives for the Lord and So we are having right now even 10, 15 women that come out of the 1% that are on the base of women.
00:12:07
Speaker
So we're we're actually doing better than the 1% that come, right? Because there's all less than 100 women on base probably. And so we're doing pretty good when we have that many. and But the chaplains really just ask us how – We can assist them.
00:12:26
Speaker
and we ask them the same question back because we want to be in a partnership with them for the Lord. we We say, OK, it's your chapel. We're here to partner with you. What can we do to assist you?
00:12:37
Speaker
and a lot of them usually will say, well, what are you doing now? And we'll tell them we're running a Bible study. We're doing this. I help with the worship team. And they're like, well, why don't you just keep doing that? And we'll figure out if we need to change it.
00:12:50
Speaker
But then by the time they usually think about changing something, they leave. Yeah, I mean, so we have two different kinds of chaplains that we work with. The one that's assigned to our base chapel who gives the message every Sunday.
00:13:05
Speaker
But there's always a time between when one chaplain leaves and the next chaplain comes. So we'll have anywhere from one year, or one time we had two years between a chaplain that was actually assigned to chaplain. our chapel giving the Sunday message.
00:13:22
Speaker
So we'll have a chaplain that's assigned there. But when when one time we
Emotional Challenges and Personal Transformations
00:13:27
Speaker
had like a two year lag before we were assigned another, what I would call a pastor chaplain, who's our pastor of our congregation, but we'll always have at least two or three months.
00:13:37
Speaker
And so during that time, we have fill chaplain, and So we'll have one of those UDP chaplains or every unit pretty much has their own chaplain where they're not typically preaching ever.
00:13:50
Speaker
They're doing counseling or meeting with guys during the week or there. And they're also deployed with them when they go to places, other places in Asia. um So we're we're there, you know, we stay. So we're we're always there to fill in for them.
00:14:06
Speaker
when there isn't actually a chaplain. So you'll have a new chaplain that comes in just for the one Sunday and they're like, what are we supposed to do? And so i know like in the US, when a church loses their pastor, seems like half the congregation leaves, you know, but we try to hold everybody together and keep them coming and say no, or, and we,
00:14:28
Speaker
We encourage everyone to pray for the chaplains that are coming in. ah So and we'll even when we know who our chaplain is going to be, we'll even message them and we'll tell the guys, hey, message this chaplain because there are deployed people as well.
00:14:41
Speaker
I mean, I think that's something people don't seem to remember is that the chaplains are also military people. They're going through all the same military challenges that the people that they're ministering to do. And they don't really have a group to turn to.
00:14:57
Speaker
um I remember one chaplain who was just here on UDP. He was having a really, really rough time. He had also got one of the vaccination shots, maybe like some smallpox or one of those things like they get.
00:15:08
Speaker
And it just got him so sick. And he was also just really down. You know, he had just left his brand new baby, his wife back in the States.
00:15:19
Speaker
and And he was having a very rough time mentally. There was probably a little depression. and so it was really neat to see Daryl really pour into this man because he was just a brand new chaplain and just as young as pretty much all the other guys that are coming to our house right now in those early twenty s And it was really it was neat to be able to pour into a chaplain who when he gets back on ship to go back ah to deploy with these men, he's able to pour back into them because we poured into him.
00:15:50
Speaker
So that was a neat thing to see. I don't know if we totally expected that when we moved here, but ministering to chaplains has been one of the joys in ministry for us.
00:16:01
Speaker
That's great. And that's a gift. I'm just thinking, you know, of someone back in the U.S. listening to this podcast, if they were to think about changing the pastor in their church every year.
00:16:13
Speaker
I mean, that's what you guys are talking about doing every year. The pastor changes. And yet you guys are there kind of as a foundation and providing a ah strong consistency for the Christian community.
00:16:25
Speaker
Sounds exhausting. I mean, was... was In Okinawa, not with the same tempo that you guys have with the UDPs and the rate of turnover, you know, our chaplains would change out often, but less than a year is just ah and crazy fast.
00:16:41
Speaker
And it takes a toll. I'm curious, what are... ah First of all, I guess I want to know, what are some of the ways that you see God redeeming that? Because just on the face, that's it's challenging. It's it's difficult. to ah it sounds It sounds less than ideal to have people coming and going so frequently. Where do you see God's redemptive work in the midst of that?
00:17:04
Speaker
Yeah, I think it's, it is really rough. I mean, we say a lot of goodbyes. It is really, really hard to do that. And there's a lot of, I mean, I mean, get emotional. Just think about it.
00:17:17
Speaker
And one of the you know, one of, I think the tendency would be maybe to pull back and maybe you don't get as invested ah and people so that it doesn't, so it's not painful when people leave. But the truth is, is that if it's not painful when they leave, are you doing it right?
00:17:37
Speaker
I mean, there's a cost to this ministry. You know, we count the cost. And I have to say that being here 10 years with all the goodbyes, it it's worth the cost.
00:17:50
Speaker
When you see someone who hates their life and comes to know Jesus and realize that life is precious and that they are a precious creation in the Lord, it is worth that cost. When you see marriages redeemed, it is worth that cost. When, you know, when you see Families come back together.
00:18:10
Speaker
When you see young men who really didn't have any confidence in themselves at all, and then they then have confidence in the Lord and then in themselves and in their calling.
00:18:24
Speaker
That that cost is worth it. That investment is worth it. When you see marriages saved, when you see friendships that are unlikely, when you see a person who is, you know, I'm just going to listen to my old church, my church back home on Sunday, and I don't really need to plug in And then you...
00:18:44
Speaker
explain to them, you know, Hebrews 10, 24 and 25, and you're like, you know, don't neglect meeting together. You need your family here just as much as you need your family back in the States. And when you see friendships develop from that, and then five, 10 years later, those people are still getting together. That, that cost is worth it, you know?
00:19:07
Speaker
Yeah. And we have one right now, even ah Jordan, that he ah was here stationed. He was permanent party. he was He was part of one of the units here that was permanent.
00:19:18
Speaker
And he was here for two years. He was back when they were only doing two-year assignments. And he started to show up at the house the last year that he was here. And during that time, we were able to show him the love of the Lord, tell him about who Christ really is and how he he say not only saved him, but he wanted to actually have a relationship with him.
00:19:41
Speaker
And Jordan came to know Christ and was baptized here. And but that wasn't the end. He ended up reenlisting. He went out to twenty nine Palms.
00:19:54
Speaker
And then, as we were saying earlier, he ended up coming back here a couple of years later and we were still here. And he's like, I know where I'm going. And so for the six months he was deployed here, he was at our house.
00:20:08
Speaker
Every as much as he could be. and then during that deployment, it was his next reenlistment. And he he told his his unit, he said, the only way I'll reenlist is if you will send me back to Okinawa full time.
00:20:28
Speaker
And so he is now back here. He got here a year ago. He's back here full time for three years. And he is part of our worship team. And he is just sown into the new people's lives because there is no one here that knew him.
00:20:45
Speaker
Back then from the first deployment, but or when he was here, permanent party, people did recognize him when he came back after his deployment. And then he came back here full time. They're like, what are you doing here?
00:20:57
Speaker
And and so but they're all leaving. So he's going to be here longer than all of those people. The reason he came back was because he loves the Lord, but he also loves this place and he loves me and Vicki and we love him.
00:21:09
Speaker
and And so it was just one of those things that he really reenlisted because he knew he would be in a safe Christian environment to help him grow in the Lord where he didn't have to wonder.
00:21:23
Speaker
That's great. And I'm sure it's when he listens to this, he needs to know too, like that's a gift to you guys. i mean, in a community with so much transient nature for you guys to have someone who's come back a couple of times and then wants to be there long-term. I mean, what a gift and a blessing from the Lord to you guys as well.
Celebrating Holidays in Okinawa
00:21:45
Speaker
So we thank the Lord for him and how God's brought him to you guys.
00:21:50
Speaker
Also, just curious, ah you know, podcasts are supposed to be timeless and all that, but we're ready go into the holiday season at the time we're recording this. What do holidays look like in Okinawa?
00:22:02
Speaker
You know, it's one of the interesting things about about it ah is that we are all going through the same thing. So the Marines are going through the same thing that we're going through. We're all missing our families back in the States. You know, Daryl and I are missing our families and all the Marines are.
00:22:21
Speaker
So one of the thing, I mean, and then Marines, unlike when Dara was in the Air Force, Marines get a lot of time off. I know that sounds kind of strange. they When they're working, they work they work a lot, but then they give them these times off and they call them a 96.
00:22:38
Speaker
ah Civilians call it a four-day weekend, but they call 96. 96 straight hours off. And then that doesn't include Friday night when they're already here on that Friday that they didn't have off. Oh, yeah. So if their if their day's off for Monday and Tuesday, which most of the time it is.
00:22:55
Speaker
We get them at five o'clock on Friday. So then what add another 12 hours to the 96. That's how long we get them. So from from Veterans Day until Martin Luther King Day, they get a 96 two weeks.
00:23:12
Speaker
So every other weekend, we have them for four days of the weekend and we have our house just wide open. They can just, they can spend the night, they can stay in the, instead of being in the barracks, which can be very loud at times, they can just stay at our house the whole time.
00:23:28
Speaker
And then especially, so when you say holidays, those are all holidays, but like for Thanksgiving, we'll have everybody over here on Wednesday evening and they'll help me cook. And I tell them, I'm like, well, you know, I could cook all of Thanksgiving for you guys, but I'd be dead. So if you So then they all come and cook and it's fun because I give them my recipes and I, I assign three guys because I figure if all three of them are reading the recipe, maybe something good will come out of that.
00:23:56
Speaker
So, I mean, it's fun. I've taught them how to make rolls. They roll them all out, flowers flying everywhere. it is just a lot of fun. Everybody gets together and does that. And then they're here the whole Thanksgiving, all Thanksgiving. And then we, of course, that's always a Thursday. And then we have the back here on Friday And then the whole weekend starts over again. And we decorate for Christmas that weekend, just like they would back in the States. Most people over the Thanksgiving holiday, you know, on Saturday, either Friday, Saturday, we decorate the whole house.
00:24:25
Speaker
And so we have guys up on the roof hanging lights and we have them putting up the trees and decorating the inside. And so we just... have it make it their house, not just ours.
00:24:40
Speaker
And we did all the decorating and they just kind of show up. We actually have them do everything. And that gives them a sense of ownership of the place, as well as it shows that they are part of our family.
00:24:54
Speaker
That's true. They're also very creative. I got to tell you, the house looks different every year. They're just very creative guys putting up the decorations and everything. And one of the One of the interesting things that happens on Christmas Day as you see Maureen is just kind of off to the side talking to mom and dad.
00:25:13
Speaker
And that is really neat. And then they'll bring their phones and they'll video chat and they'll bring them, hey, i want you to meet Vicki. want you to meet Daryl. And so it's really neat to be able to meet their parents. A lot of them, I would say, come from, you know, divorced homes. And so we're typically having two different conversations between parents.
00:25:32
Speaker
So it's fun to meet their families. and They get excited about it. And it's a joy to share in with that. We also have supporting churches that will ah send us things that we then stuff into stockings. And so every Marine that walks through the door, we give them a stocking full of like just candies and gifts and all kinds of fun things. so We try to make sure that everyone's checked in on.
00:25:56
Speaker
And if we sense that someone's kind of starting to be distant, because it might be easier to be distant during holidays. um Oh, can we say we encourage the other Marines to go kidnap them and bring them?
00:26:10
Speaker
We do typically do that. And they they do go check in on their friends then and make sure that everybody's safe and okay and just feeling the joy and the love of the Lord.
00:26:23
Speaker
Because joy is present in sadness. You know, if you're sad that you're not with your family, that's normal. But there's the joy of the Lord stays even through sadness. And so we want to we want to teach them that, you know, it it's okay to to be sad that you're not with You know, your mom and dad and your brothers and sisters.
00:26:44
Speaker
But the joy of the Lord is still there because God is still good, even in the midst of sadness. Yeah. And that they have a family here that loves them just as well, even though it's not their biological family, it's their family in Christ and their brothers and sisters in Christ that love them well.
00:27:00
Speaker
hmm. And so we want to show them that, but but we also tell them that, right? And so we're telling them that every weekend, but over the holidays, we really stress conversations as well, not just a Friday night teaching or a weekend teaching. We get to sit down even more so because we're with them a lot, that we get to sit down and have one-on-one conversations with them really a lot during these holiday times and get to know them really well. And they get to know us.
Impact of Consistent Ministry
00:27:29
Speaker
And a few of them do go get to go back home. They do get to to go visit their families. And so we might have a little bit less at the house on the holidays, which is a good thing because then we really do get to know each other and they get to know each other really well.
00:27:45
Speaker
And so they build really strong relationships, those people who stay back here and who don't go home. And we really get to know them as well. And and they get to know us. They get to we have our upstairs area and most of them have been up here. We have a bathroom up here that we use every Friday night, but they didn't really check it out. But over the holidays, it's pretty much a more open house, um especially now that our kids are no longer here.
00:28:11
Speaker
So they just get to come up and we'll sit on the couch. Don't want to talk. Hey, can I go talk to one-on-one and we'll bring them upstairs and say, yeah, let's talk. And while the house is just packed downstairs and Vicky will have the women up here and just have the women sit around because they need that break away from all the guys.
00:28:28
Speaker
And so she just does that as well. And so it's just, available and they, but they know that we love them and we go and do a bunch of outings as well. It's not just sitting around the house. We go and take them to the aquarium. We take them to botanical gardens. We take them out and and have them doing stuff fun together.
00:28:47
Speaker
to show that Christians can actually have fun as well. And so we do sports days and we, and we do wiffle ball and we go do other things as well. And during the holidays, it just more freeing to do that instead of having to organize it on like a Saturday when they're like, Hey, I'm tired this week.
00:29:04
Speaker
You know, but they have four days, then they're less tired and they get to just do that and go do things and enjoy time together. And they want to be with each other and they go out to eat and they do things.
00:29:16
Speaker
But on these long weekends, it really just gives them a chance to relax and enjoy each other's company. You guys are really just having a blast, aren't you?
00:29:27
Speaker
You know, it's funny, though, because we keep getting older and they keep staying the same age. But it it is a lot of fun. It's especially fun when you see your you know, your 22 year old self.
00:29:42
Speaker
When you see yourself in somebody. and yeah, it's fun. It's a lot of fun. You guys paint such a beautiful picture of laying your lives down, building community.
00:29:54
Speaker
really amazing. is so significantly impacted by the fact that you've stayed, that you've remained in that place, that you've been faithful in that ministry that has been present for so long and that people continue to come back. They want to come back. They want to be a part. They're inspired to lay their lives down for the sake of the gospel and serve that community.
00:30:18
Speaker
Um, it, It's powerful what you guys are doing and it comes at a great cost. So we just want to say thank you. You guys are doing that real difficult, faithful work on the front lines in people's lives. and And you've been faithful with it and it's bearing so much fruit. It's so much fun to get this picture of it with you guys.
00:30:40
Speaker
Amen. Thank you. Yeah, thank you. It's a joy. it is a joy. Yeah. and so, again, we we have tons of stories. We could just keep going on this. um But the basics of it are that we teach them about Jesus Christ.
00:30:59
Speaker
We share his love with them and God does the rest.
Conclusion and Further Resources
00:31:05
Speaker
Amen. And for anybody who wants to know little more about the Frasers, you can go to cadence.org backslash Frasier and you'll find them and more about their story. You can get connected with them.
00:31:16
Speaker
If you want to know just more about cadence, cadence.org, or you've got any questions, email us at info at cadence.org.