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Creating boundaries for 2023 - Jen Taylor - Biz Coach
191 Plays2 years ago
Happy woo Wednesdays! I just dropped a new episode of Get a heck yes.
Jen Taylor wedding pro biz coach, podcaster, certified Director of Operations, is in the house.
Achieve your dreams as a badass business owner with Jen.
Implement streamlined systems and improve your work-life balance while your business grows.
Today we talk about the b word boundaries. The main takeaway is Letting you know that is OK to take care of your self! Setting up boundaries is a way to make sure you have time and space for yourself, your business and your family
The start of the new year is the perfect time to set your boundaries so you stay in control and don’t get resentful toward your biz
Some fun things we talk about.
How to make your best practice one sheeter,
What’s your pain in the ass fee? Never heard that before.
Should your clients be able to text you?
Tune in and enjoy wedding photographers and pros.
Link is to my Best Practice Sheet.
https://jentaylorconsulting.com/best-practices/
Connect with Jen
https://jentaylorconsulting.com/design-your-wedding-business-podcast/
Connect with Carissa Woo
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Transcript
Introduction and New Year Excitement
00:00:00
Speaker
Happy Woo Wednesdays and Happy 2023. Happy New Year. I can't believe I'm saying that. It's the start of a new year and I'm so excited for this year for lots of cool podcasts, lots of cool interviews, and just to serve you guys. Check out my website www.heckyesmedia.co and get my freebies. You can download a free guide on how to get content inquiries and fill your inbox with inquiries. So yeah, check it out.
00:00:29
Speaker
Today, I have Jen Taylor from Jen Taylor Consulting. She's also a business coach just like me. And today, we're going to be talking about managing boundaries with your ideal clients, how to communicate, when do you meet, and creating a best piece practice at one page for your clients.
00:00:47
Speaker
It's super, super helpful. And the biggest takeaway for you guys today is letting you guys know that it's okay to take care of yourself. Setting up boundaries is a way to make sure you have time and space for yourself, your business, and your family. Enjoy!
Jen Taylor's Journey and Business Insights
00:01:07
Speaker
Welcome to Get a Heck Yes with Carissa Wu. I'm your host, Carissa, and I've been a Los Angeles wedding photographer for over a decade. I've traveled the world, built my team, and seen it all. I now coach wedding photographers hit 10K a month and build a thriving business. In this podcast, we are going to deep dive into how top wedding creatives get that heck yes from their dream clients. We are not holding back on the struggles of the business and how to push through the noise. Some healthy hustle,
00:01:33
Speaker
mindset shifts, up-leveling your money story, time packs because I'm a mom of two, a little bit of woo-woo, and most importantly, self-love and confidence are just a few of the many things we will talk about. I want to give you a genuine thank you for following along my journey. I hope to inspire you every Woo Wednesday so that you say heck yes to listening to this podcast. See you guys soon!
00:01:58
Speaker
Hey everyone, welcome back to Good and Heck Yes with me, your host, Carissa Wu. I have a very special guest. Her name is Jen Taylor with Jen Taylor Consulting, and she's a wedding professional business coach, certified director of operation. She's a speaker, she's an author. Like I said, she's a coach, she's amazing. You guys could go check her out at Jen Taylor Consulting. Welcome, Jen Taylor. Thank you so much for having me, Carissa. I'm so happy to be here. Yeah, and you said you're in the beautiful Seattle, right?
00:02:27
Speaker
I'm in the beautiful Seattle area. Cool. What are your plans for the holiday season? I'm sticking around here. And then after the holidays, we're going to head off to Maui. Whoa, that sounds amazing. For about 10 days just to get out of the cold and enjoy the nice weather there. That's my pseudo second home. Oh, really? Do you go there often? I do. I do. Wow. Yeah, we just got back from Kona. Oh, nice. We missed all the excitement though.
00:02:57
Speaker
Yeah, the volcano erupted. I saw that I think it happened like literally like three weeks after we were there. Yeah, the air was like polluted. So maybe it was a good thing. Yeah, yeah, that's what they're gonna they're gonna be worried about fog. So man. Well, yeah, tell us about you what you do who you serve a little bit about your journey. Yeah. So, um,
00:03:22
Speaker
I have, I was, I am, I still, that's part of who I am, a wedding planner. I started my business, Jen Taylor, sorry, let me go back, a tailored events group in 2004. I grew my team to four other planners, five, including me. And in 2018, things started to shift for myself and my business. My planners were getting to a point where they wanted to have families and kids and move
00:03:52
Speaker
move on and then I had the very unexpected happen where my husband passed away.
The Importance of Boundaries and Strategic Planning
00:03:59
Speaker
And so I decided to close down the business.
00:04:04
Speaker
At the end of the year, we finished all of our weddings. I still had two weddings for myself the next year, which, you know, which I completed. And then 2020 showed up and, you know, I had a wedding that got postponed and then canceled. And, and so Gen Tater Consulting was, was in the infancy in 2018 and, you know, just started to kind of like, what do I want to do? Where do I want to go? Where's my own pivots?
00:04:26
Speaker
And I love the wedding profession. I, you know, I, I told you, I tried to get out. I tried to jump out and go to the wine industry or just whatever. And I just couldn't. I love the, I love the wedding profession so much. He just pulls you back in, right? He pulls me back in every time. I'm like, I've got to leave. No, it's never ending, you know, battle with it myself, but I love it. And so,
00:04:53
Speaker
I am, as you said in the intro, I'm a director of operations. So I got certified as a director of operations. So that means I can help businesses with the strategic parts of their businesses. And that's what I love to do. I love to sit down and talk business and talk strategy and talk about what's going on in their business. And so a lot of that, you know, one of the first things I talk about with my clients is
00:05:20
Speaker
setting the boundaries and expectations for themselves and their business. And it's a huge part of that because once you get that set, you kind of have a framework of like, this is what I do and this is what's going to happen. Wow. I'm so sorry about your husband. That is just, that's really heavy.
00:05:39
Speaker
It was pretty heavy. It was, but you know, it, you know, you sit there and go, you know what? It's the plan that it was. So I have to make it and, and to move on and see what my life will be without that.
00:05:53
Speaker
Wow, okay, so let's talk about pivoting. This crazy life event tragedy happened to you and 2020 pandemic happened. And just tell me what was going through your head and the shifts of being a wedding planner for so long and having this team and just kind of soul searching, wanting to go in different industry and that pullback, kind of walk us through that journey.
00:06:19
Speaker
The journey was, you know, I, you know, very much in this, you know, as a service industry, you want to make sure your clients are safe and set. And my husband, you know, worked for himself as well. So I had to close down his business and reach out to his client, not one, but it was a doozy. And so I spent, luckily it was, you know, it was on Halloween. So, you know, it was,
00:06:47
Speaker
I was done with the, in Seattle, we're kind of done with the wedding season by the end of October. So as I said, we had one wedding in left, it was a New Year's Eve wedding, we finished that off. And then, you know, in that planner moved on, she actually moved across the state. And then, you know, so then I'm like, okay, what do I wanna do? I still have these two weddings that I love and I wanna do and I'm gonna keep doing them, but what else is there?
00:07:14
Speaker
So when the pandemic hit, that's when I was like, okay, this is the best time to plant the tree, to do the SOPs, to get, and the wedding professionals were like, no, we're not there. We're not there. And so I'm like, you know what, maybe this is a good time to try out the wine industry. So I took a certification of wine, a business of wine, same as a director of operations, but focused more on the wine industry. So that was my pivot. And I'm like,
00:07:39
Speaker
Okay, what am I going to do with this? I don't have the connections as I do in the wedding industry. I don't have the name recognition. I don't have the speaking and all of that stuff. So why? It was for my own thing. I love it. And so I'm like, okay. So I kind of sat down and said, okay, what's the third? I mean, it's literally been a third pivot. What's the third pivot? And it was literally looking back behind me and going,
00:08:06
Speaker
It's going to be the wedding industry because I love it. I love talking about it. I love, I love everything about it. I love the people. And so I've been doing it for 15 years. So, you know, I don't, I don't, you know, what am I doing? So any industry it is, I help, I help all creative industry. So interior designers, things like that. It's not, you know, not, I'm not always just focused on the wedding industry, but people that are very creative because they're wanting to,
00:08:36
Speaker
Be creative.
00:08:37
Speaker
They don't want to do this other crap in their business. It makes it hard. And so I try to find ways to make it easy for them to create the operating procedures, to create a strategic plan for them to go, okay, this is how I do my business. And it's not how I do my business, it's how you do your business. So if you know like, okay, this is how I want to run my business, great. Don't let anybody else tell you different.
00:09:07
Speaker
because it's your business. And so that's where the Design Your Wedding business became about in the podcast and the group. And it's really about, I'm gonna give you the path, but you take the path and make it your own.
Client Expectations and Business Operations
00:09:23
Speaker
And that's what I did with my weddings. I'm like, I will be the guide and I will point the way and shine the light on things that you need to see.
00:09:35
Speaker
And, you know, but at the end of the day, it's your wedding, not mine. It was lovely, but I don't need to plan my wedding over and over and over and over again.
00:09:44
Speaker
Yeah, I mean shout out to the wedding industry. There's something about us that just is vibrant. Like you said, we're creatives and we're all hopeless romantics. We love love. We're all about collaboration and bringing each other up. And a lot of industries are not like that. We like to share. We like to party.
00:10:06
Speaker
We'd like to have fun. And something like, I've known people like they try to go to like makeup or like microblading or eyelashes and then something pulls them back to the wedding industry. So it's just so much fun. Let's talk more about like what your business looks like today as a coach. Like how many, what any professionals you work with and what's a little bit, what's it like working with you? Working with me, I hope is fun.
00:10:34
Speaker
Um, I try to, you know, a lot of it's via zoom, what, you know, you know, so I'm not gonna, I'm not gonna lie. That's that part of it sucks. Um, just because everybody's all over the world or all over the United States doesn't matter. Um, but I really sit down with my clients and find out how, what they want to do. So I have three ways, you know, I have multiple ways to work with me, but three primary ways. One is one-to-one coaching.
00:10:59
Speaker
and that's once a week or every other week, we get together and move your business forward. The next is where everybody starts, and I should really start there, but I don't, is the business mapping. So we take the strategic areas of your business, I call them the eight CEOs, and we go through that and work on that for your business and go, okay, what's the map for your business for the next year?
00:11:26
Speaker
but you're always looking a little bit ahead. You're like, okay, what's your vision for your business? What's your three-year vision? What's your five-year vision? Because then you take that and go, okay, what can I do to get me to those visions? You're going backwards going, okay, this is where I wanna be in three years. Now, how do I get there? And that's where the mapping comes in. Because we're like, okay, you wanna be here. We have to do X, Y, and Z.
00:11:52
Speaker
Yeah, it's so much like it takes a lot of pressure off of you and an entrepreneur if they look through things from like a bird's eye view because it doesn't feel like you're throwing spaghetti at the wall and hoping something sticks or chasing that shiny object or listening to every single person out there telling you what to do. It's just, it's like, what do you really want for the next three years? Like really ask yourself that. How much do you want to make per year? How much do you want to make the next year? Like it's just, it's not even about
00:12:20
Speaker
money either it's about where do you want your life, you know, because it can it is combined together. So yes, the money is important because it's going to get you things that you want to do in your life. But it's also like, you know, where we get back to it's like, what does what is your what do you want your life to be?
00:12:36
Speaker
You know, what is what are your core value? What are the core words for you? One of mine is freedom. So I want to have the freedom. Freedom can mean anything. Freedom can be I want the freedom to work wherever I want the freedom to take time off when I want to take time off. I want the freedom to get up after we have this podcast and go for a drive.
00:12:58
Speaker
and not feel committed to sitting down and working on something that I don't wanna work on at the moment. So that's where the design your business comes in is really looking at it and taking that map and saying, okay, this is the map. This is the guide that I need to take me through the next four quarters. And then, so mapping is first, I do that with all
Work-Life Balance and Personal Experiences
00:13:26
Speaker
of my clients.
00:13:27
Speaker
than the one-to-one coaching.
00:13:31
Speaker
I have a three month process where we do the mapping and then we work on a standard operating procedure. Most of the time it's your client experience because the client experience is always something that needs attention. Yes, because you're not going to give more clients if you don't have a client experience. I mean, it could be like you're like, I don't, it's not feeling clunky. You know, like I'm going to be doing something on the NACE, they're doing a NACE virtual thing on next week. And I'm talking about,
00:14:01
Speaker
looking at your client experience. What does it need to be? Does it need to be revamped? Does it need to be tweaked? What is it that you need to look at and say, okay, this needs to be fixed? Are you doing all the things that you should be doing to maximize what your clients think of you?
00:14:20
Speaker
Then at the end, if somebody's like, you know what? I just want the client experience. I want a VIP day. I want just to do the client experience. I have a VIP day that's just purely the client experience. We meet between six and eight hours. There's lots of breaks in there, but we talk about your client experience. What do you have? Or do you have one? If not, then let's create it. And then, so at the end of it, you have,
00:14:50
Speaker
a fairly good client experience to start off with. And then these all get tweaked. Your business just, I'll go back to a wedding analogy. Your timeline is never the timeline. It is a guide. I keep on going back to that. It's a map, it's a guide. I told my clients, I said, my goal as a planner is to get you down the aisle
00:15:14
Speaker
as close to that time on that invitation as humanly possible. I said, after that, it becomes a party.
00:15:23
Speaker
People end up in the, you know, not literally, like if you go to your, if you have a party at your house, everybody ends up in the kitchen, like it's a party. Everybody ends up in the kitchen. It doesn't matter. I'm like, you know, this is a roadmap. I mean, there's times and, you know, everybody has stories about a timeline that's gone completely fricking hair, you know, haywire. I mean, I had one that we were almost down the aisle and the dad had to stop because he had,
00:15:52
Speaker
Parkinson's? So 45 minutes later, the ceremony started up again. Oh my God. I had to write down. I'm sitting there. I'm ready to, you know, I had to go up to the, I'm like, everybody's, it's fine. Nothing's wrong. We're just at a delay. So please mingle. And I will call you all back when we're ready for the ceremony. You're like, oh my God.
00:16:16
Speaker
I resonate with that story because I was drunk at my wedding, a good drunk, and I learned from my wedding DJ Hilo Productions, my good friend, that my husband lifted me up to go to the dance floor, which is very funny because he's an introvert and he wouldn't do something like that. And then right when I was going to dance, I said, hey, say stop, I have to go pee. So that probably pushed the timeline back now at 45 minutes, but maybe like five minutes. So I just, you know, and
00:16:44
Speaker
We ended up, you know, I figured it out and we, you know, we've got everything done and did all that until the groomsmen, one of the groomsmen just blend blew me completely out of the water with this speech. I'm like, dude, this is not about you. Oh my God. This timeline was perfect and now you just blew it up. Oh my God. That is so funny. How do you get your best, heck yes, from your dream client?
00:17:09
Speaker
I have to add. So the, the best heck yes is, you know, really. So I'm a prime example. I've had a, she's, uh, she, we've known each other. She's a planner in the Washington area. We've talked about her business. We've done all that. And I'm like, she sent it over to somebody that we talked and, you know, and, and she's coaching with me. And then I'm like, you know, you really need to do a mapping. And she's like, man, man.
00:17:36
Speaker
I'm like, you really do. It's really, it will be beneficial for you to do that. She got COVID. She called me up and she goes, heck yeah, I do need to get with you and I do need to figure this, this out. So when you think about your business, you've got to think about the back of the thing. What's going to happen if you get COVID? What's going to happen if you get, you know, I, you know, hit by a bus. What happens if something happens that you are now trying to figure out how you're going to tell your
00:18:05
Speaker
the person that's going to take over the wedding because you can't because something's happened. How are you going to tell them what to do? And if you don't have the processes and procedures in place, then you can't. And you're literally in a point of, I don't know what to do.
00:18:22
Speaker
And that's where a lot of, a lot of professionals get, and that's where you see a lot of those, you know, things on TV of something happened and the bride is now really pissed or the mom is really pissed. And now they're going to go to the news. And if you had a process in place to go over whatever disaster is happening, then you have, you're, you're going to be set. So the heck yeah is.
00:18:49
Speaker
You look at your business and go, I have nothing written down. It's all in my head. I need to get it out and I need to have it, you know, somewhere where I can send it off to somebody. Totally. You know, like here's where all my timelines are. Here's where all my this and here's that. And here's, you know, but in the longer term,
00:19:11
Speaker
You want to hire. You need to have process and procedures in place to hire somebody because then you're just going to get frustrated with yourself because you're not, you don't have anything written down. So you're just telling them and it may not come across the same way.
00:19:28
Speaker
Amen, Jen Taylor. Okay, let's get into our hot topic. What is our hot topic? And why is it so near and dear to your heart? You kind of explained boundaries and expectations. Managing boundaries is my favorite word because I've struggled with it being a people pleaser. Oh, it's hard for me. But
00:19:49
Speaker
Now it's kind of like you got to say no because something's got to give. So talk about it. Yeah, I've actually just talked to a really good she's she's one of my she's one of my really best friends and and I've known her for a long time and her husband owns with his brother a transportation company. And then, you know, and so I'm like, you know, your husband's gotta set some boundaries with that he's because of it. I mean, it's just health.
00:20:19
Speaker
It's health. So creating boundaries help manage the following. Your health, the stress, the emotion, the physical, the behavior, all of those things, you're stressed, your body's gonna shut down. If you're emotional, what do you do when you get emotional? Are you an eater or a drinker? There's a lot of these things, physical, your body breaks down. I was at this point,
00:20:47
Speaker
In 2018, before my husband passed away, I was physically starting to fail because I kept all the stress inside and did not have an outlet to let it go. I want to like shake it out right now. You're like, whoo, whoo, whoo. And then behavior. Do you get really, you know, it goes back to the emotion. Do you get really, you know, depressed? Do you, you know, what's the behavior parts of that?
00:21:14
Speaker
you get resentful, the resentful of your business, the resentful of not feeling appreciated, not you're not charging enough. I mean, I go through and say, you know, I look at, you know, if there's a certain day that I get asked to do a wedding, you know, am I charged? What's the pain in the ass fee? What's the
00:21:35
Speaker
You know, because are you missing your kid's birthday party? Are you missing your own anniversary? I mean, one I did, I missed my 10 year anniversary, but so did my husband. He was traveling and I'm like, well, if you're gone, I might as well do a wedding. So, you know, it was no big deal. But, you know, what is the resentment factor if I'm doing something on Christmas Eve or I'm doing something on New Year's Eve? You know, like if I'm working over the holidays, what's the resentment factor?
00:22:03
Speaker
And if I'm, am I charging enough to be, if I'm charging enough and I'm not resentful, I'm like, hell I'll do the sweating and I'm going to charge $15,000. Okay. I'm not resentful about that because I'm making money.
00:22:16
Speaker
I was shooting weddings basically for free or for like a grand and I was having to haggle for every single session to try and like show them my value and now I have clients coming to me saying that they want to work with me and I have more importantly other people in the industry recognizing my worth and asking me to work with them.
00:22:42
Speaker
which to me means even more than the clients because they're people who've been in the industry for 10 plus years. They've seen you know hundreds of other photographers and they're able to recognize me and the value that I can offer them.
00:22:59
Speaker
Yep, that's my student Kimberly. She's just one of my dozens of students crushing it. Go on my website, www.heckyesmedia.co and book a 15 minute strategy session with me. Only if you want to be booked out on multiple preferred vendor lists and have a proven marketing plan.
00:23:20
Speaker
Yeah, I like how you put it like pain in the ass. You don't have to tell them. You don't have to have it quoted. But in your head, you're like, there's an extra, you know, there's an extra $500 because I know I'm going to be freaking dealing with you all the time or just say no.
00:23:40
Speaker
Yeah. My husband's a cop and on his holidays, he gets paid like triple. So it's like, we don't get to see him for opening presents, but, or spend time with my extended family, but he's making more. And so we need to be treating ourselves the same way as a business owner.
Managing Family Boundaries During Remote Work
00:23:57
Speaker
It's like, if I'm working on one of these days that I feel like that, then I need to charge a, you know, either resentment factor fee.
00:24:06
Speaker
Or if I know that you're going to be a pain in the ass, then I'm going to charge a pain in the ass fee. Yeah. Let's talk a little bit about resentment. Like I'm sure you work with many different wedding professionals. Like what does it mean? Like when you resent your business and I know after we would resent it, then their health deteriorates. You have more stress, but like, what does it do to your business? You get very complacent. Hmm.
00:24:30
Speaker
You don't care, you don't care. And it's not necessarily, I see it with business owners, it's more of maybe somebody working for you or working, if you're a bigger company, if somebody is resenting how you're treating them or how you're working them, then that's where the resentment comes in. When a business owner gets resentful, it's usually from a client.
00:24:57
Speaker
And so as a business owner, I'm making sure my planners were not resentful or not getting burned out. And there are times I did not do a very good job of that. As my own planner working with my clients, I needed to make sure that I had my boundaries set, that I didn't become resentful of them. I had to set the boundaries around that.
00:25:25
Speaker
So they all got, and if they didn't, then I knew what happened. They all got a best practice sheet that said, here's the best practices for our tailored events. Like what our work hours are, and we'll get into this more. But really setting those boundaries, I didn't want text. And I had a client who texts me all the time, and I realized I did not present them my best practices.
00:25:52
Speaker
So I was getting resentful towards them. Cause I'm like, I don't want to fricking open my phone. Like you, the only reason you have my cell phone number is because I, I see your white, I see your fiance for my nails. That's the only way you have my, if, if this wasn't a different relationship, you would not have my cell phone number. So, you know, so you really have to set those down. And if it, and if you follow, if you fall down and you're like, you know what, that was on me, then that's great, but then fix it.
00:26:22
Speaker
So I said, stop texting me. I can't plan your wedding via text. I actually printed out all the texts, put it in his binder, and then told him, I said, we're done. You need to email me going forward. I will not answer a text. I will not, until your wedding day,
00:26:44
Speaker
I will not answer a text. Oh, that's great. I was gonna mention this later, but I downloaded your amazing freebie and tell us a little bit about it. It's best practices. I have client guidelines, but tell us about your freebie and then we could even talk about it a little bit more. So the best practices and this is where I saw in there and we'll go circle back around. So where to draw your boundaries?
00:27:12
Speaker
This is the best practice sheet is really what are your work hours? What days do you work? Where and when do you meet with clients? How do you communicate? Also, I talk about our wedding professionals. I don't call them vendors, I call them wedding professionals.
00:27:33
Speaker
So in that best practice sheet, it talks about, we will ask for a discount, but not necessarily you will get a discount. Because they are professionals. They need to pay their bills. Just like you need to pay your bills. Totally. Thank you for looking out for us. So I mean, that was a huge part of, I'm like, I will ask. I will always ask, but don't always expect that. Thank you.
00:28:03
Speaker
Just because we asked for a quote doesn't mean you're booked. You need to pay the deposit or the, not referral, the retainer fee. Once you do that, then you're booked. But up until then, the things only held for so long.
00:28:23
Speaker
Yeah. Cause they're going to be asking for advice, but if you're not paid, like you're just, I mean, I'm just, you know, so we kind of talk about, we, we have a little paragraph on that. We'd have paragraph on, you know, we don't give, you know, we don't, don't always expect a discount, but we will always ask. Um, and then we talk about the wedding day. We talk about what, what we expect from them. We expect them to have the, you know, the place cards in alphabetical order. We expect them to, you know, we had a whole, there's a lots of different things in there. And then we expect them to, um,
00:28:51
Speaker
Um, and then what they should expect from us. So it's a two way street, you know, like we're going to expect this from you, but you should also expect this from us on the wedding day. If you have transportation, this didn't happen to me, but it happened to a planner that I used to, I used to work with every once in a while. She had a wedding. It was at a big golf course. The last shuttle came, she went around and asked for people, you know, Hey, last shuttle DJ. Hey, last shuttle.
00:29:22
Speaker
and everybody was there. They checked the bathrooms, they checked the ballroom, all that, the shuttle left. Well, people were somewhere, somewhere else, and it's the shuttle. And I'm like, oh no, this is not your fault. It is not our fault. Yeah. The other people are gonna be pissed. Well, they effing, they blew that. Yeah. It's not our, it is not, you are grown ass people. Yes. Figure it out.
00:29:51
Speaker
And so, and so we put in there, we've like, we will call the immediate area, the patio, the bathrooms, the, you know, we might even go to the bar or the restaurant if it's attached, you know, we'll check the area, but if we're not going to go freaking out over in the old, you know, 12 to see if you're out there doing something that you shouldn't be doing anyway. So, you know, so don't expect that.
00:30:16
Speaker
Wow. You're truly, for anyone listening out there, wedding photographers and wedding professionals, you are truly setting yourself up for a success when you are, you know, managing expectations and boundaries because, you know, I just imagine like not creating boundaries and that happening. And
00:30:37
Speaker
at the end of the day, like, then you get in trouble for it. And then you're running around with a chicken, like, yes. It is not, you know, as a, you know, photographers, as a DJ, you have your own set. I mean, I'm coming at purely as a planner, but as, as any wedding professional, you have to come in with your own list of things for a photographer. You know, I, you know, I expect, you know, if you don't have a second shooter or if you do both, you know, you need to have somebody set up
00:31:07
Speaker
be the point person who knows everybody. Exactly. Know who that person is, because that's a frickin disaster. And, you know, a DJ, you expect them to have the you know, some of the music already set before you get there. You know, there are some things that just are just things that just make the day so much easier and the planning. Yeah. A lot of coaching like you can save yourself years of that because it took me so many years to figure out what you just said, like
00:31:36
Speaker
have two point people, one from the bride's side, groom's side, whatever side, helping me with family photos because my second shooter is shooting the reception details or the cocktail. So I need someone, I don't know who Uncle Joe is or Aunt Ruth is, like tell them, tell them advanced, send them the texts or a group email, like after the ceremony,
00:31:57
Speaker
meet here at the altar for family photos, don't go to the bar like this, this the family sessions or family photos could go super easy, or it could be the most stressful part of the day. Yeah, it's, you know, and so, you know, so though, you know, those are the ways to have the, you know, the best practice sheet, you know, other, you know, things, you know, the burnout the quitting profession, quitting the job you love, because you frickin can't, you can't handle setting your own boundaries and expectations.
00:32:26
Speaker
And you're not being involved with your family. You're missing family events. You're working through vacation. I mean, I worked through vacation. My mom, I would bring binders with me back in the day. Mom's like, why are you bringing binders? I'm like, well, you never know. I might, I might need a phone call. I might need to be, and I might have to have everything, you know? And, and so I've been there. I've done all this. So, you know,
00:32:49
Speaker
It's setting those best practices and letting your clients know is a huge part of creating that because then you have this is, you've set your boundaries. This is it, you know? And then when it comes to a business, that's all with clients. That's not even for you yet.
00:33:10
Speaker
for you, you're like, like, there's more boundaries. Keep it going. Especially, you know, this in 2020, when and 2021 kids were working from home, you had to set boundaries of like, if you open that door, you better be bleeding out of the eye sockets. You know, like you, you better, you know, this is, this is my sacred time and I need to work. And if you're just coming in because you have a bloody, you know, you are, you're, you're sniffling.
00:33:40
Speaker
I'm gonna frickin' just, you know, don't know, I don't know what, I don't have kids, so I don't know, but I would do something.
Personal Boundaries and Work Styles
00:33:48
Speaker
So you really, that's really important now because you never know when that could happen again. And setting those,
00:33:59
Speaker
family boundaries, you know, if it's a snow day, you now have the boundary set, okay, I've got to work. If you go on vacation and you do work, my husband and I both worked while we were on vacation. So we had an understanding. But if I go now with my boyfriend, I would have to like set the rules of, hey, I'm going to do a little bit of work between, you know, six in the morning and seven.
00:34:25
Speaker
You can go, you can sleep, you can do whatever, but I'm gonna get up and do a little bit of work. So if, you know, setting those expectations- Thank you for saying that because I struggled out with my husband, cause he's like, oh, why are you working? But I think it just goes back to like being like, hey, if we're gonna book that trip for five days, like I'm gonna have to work for maybe one and a half hours in the morning and please don't be mad. Yeah, and it's just, it's setting the expectations and that's all we have to do.
00:34:53
Speaker
is is just say, hey, I know we're going on vacation. I mean, my husband used to pay for our vacations by working. So it was just like, you know, and I'm like, I don't care. I'm gonna go down by the pool and sit by the pool all day, you know, all morning, and then you'll show up and then we'll go do whatever we want to do. But I knew that. So setting those expectations when you go on on families, vacations, even if it's just the two of you setting those expectations at the house, you know, like I am working from home.
00:35:23
Speaker
if the kids are home, this is what happens. If your husband's home, and he's like, well, I want to go do whatever, you're like, babe, I have to go whatever I have to, I have to do two hours of work, then we can go do whatever, you know, and that's where the freedom comes in. And, you know, having those expectations and the boundaries and going, you know what, I'm okay, I'm okay. So,
00:35:49
Speaker
What are the boundaries? Set apart time to focus on essential work and protect it. Know that you're, you know, these, this is what I have to do today. And I do it between, you know, find out what the best time for you to work on. Like for me, I like to work in the morning by, you know, two, three o'clock in the afternoon. I'm like, peace out. I'm
00:36:09
Speaker
You know, I'm, I might do a little work, but it's more like filing emails or just sitting on the couch. Your brain's working like, yeah. Yeah. My brain works in the morning. I can, you know, write a, you know, whatever and be done. Don't create or enforce unreal expectations. And that's for everybody for your clients, for your, you know, for the parents, whatever. Like if you are.
00:36:34
Speaker
talking to your, you know, the clients as a whole, the parents are there and things like that. Don't, you know, I always ask my clients, hey, what do you need me to take the bus for? Like, do you need me to have the bus run over me? Just let me know and I'll get hit by the bus. You need to tell me what it is.
00:36:58
Speaker
Like, you know, cause then I'll, I'll set that expectation. Oh, well, you know, whatever it is, we're not able to do that because of X, Y, and Z and make sure those X, Y, and Z's are already covered. So if they go to the venue, you're like, Hey, the mom calls you or the dad calls your aunt, whatever calls you, you need to back me up.
00:37:18
Speaker
because I need to know what bus is gonna hit me. But don't enforce something that you're like, oh yeah, I can get that to you by, especially for photographers. I can get your photos back to you by next week. Well, that's a bunch of BS. You have 20 other weddings to work on. And you probably said that to all 20 weddings. And so now you're like pulling your, this is now then creating that resentment.
00:37:46
Speaker
because you've now unrealistic expectations, you've now set them. So you say, you know what, I don't know what it is for photographers. I mean, one of my really good friends is a photographer, and she's MIA, like we have a we have a polar group. She is MIA because she is so slammed. And so
00:38:06
Speaker
She, you know, so we know like, I'll see her on Saturday, but I haven't like seen her in like four months. You know, but what is that expectation of getting the photos? What is the expectations of you doing whatever set realistic expectation? Because you're speaking to my heart, Dan Taylor. Okay, take us away with tip number three real fast. And we'll go into rapid fire questions. And then how do you get your energy?
00:38:34
Speaker
Do you, you know, so then how do you get your energy? Are you an introvert and you need that downtime or are you an extrovert and you need to go out and be with people?
00:38:46
Speaker
that goes back to how you work as well. I want you to know how, because you are going to, so if you're stuck at home and working from home and you're an extrovert, you're like, shit, I got to get out of here and get some energy from people. What does that look, you know, what does that look like for your boundaries and your expectations? You're going to maybe go work for a coffee and go work at a coffee shop, or you're going to go work somewhere where you're going to have that energy. If you're an introvert and you're like,
00:39:10
Speaker
I need to, you know, I always shut down. I was done with weddings in October. I would shut down October, November, December and start coming out in January. And that was, that was the thing I needed my downtime. I needed to, I needed to have my in. So think about that. So all of that at the end of the day is really sit down and figure out what, where to draw your boundaries.
Future Plans and Educating Wedding Planners
00:39:34
Speaker
Oh, I want to get like a tattoo like boundary. Maybe a little under here like a big, a little bee like to remind me like this is all so good. Let's, let's get into fun rapid fire questions. But what is your woo factor? What makes you stand up?
00:39:50
Speaker
What is my woo factor? What makes me stand out? I guess I will always go back to my, I had a, I have a really good friend. She, she owned a linen company and she used to tell her clients is like, Oh, do you have a wedding planner? And they're like, Oh, you know, they did. She, that's great. If she didn't, she's like, Oh, you should reach out. You know, you would really do well with Jen. She's a taskmaster. I'm like, you know, that's really mean. But at the end of the day, I am, I am somebody who will keep you moving forward in your business.
00:40:17
Speaker
I love that. What's your mantra in life? These are my mantra in life. I guess. You know, I guess it's really just, you know, live life today because I've seen it. You don't know what's going to happen. Totally. Oh my God. What do you like to do for fun?
00:40:39
Speaker
What do you like to do for fun? I'm getting into golf, so that's been a fun thing for my boyfriend and I. I love to go out wine tasting. I love to go to wineries, but I really just love just hanging around my house and being a homebody.
00:40:56
Speaker
your cute, adorable pineapple house. If someone's listening right now, wedding photographers, wedding professionals, and they're struggling, which is feeling overwhelmed, like they're, they, this year just kind of was like a tornado. And then they feel like giving up or maybe they're just super overwhelmed. Like what was, what was something they could do today to just kind of get out of the funk? Really sit down and think about how you want your business to work for you.
00:41:26
Speaker
It is your business and what went well this year and what didn't go well. Just make a list. I did this after every wedding. And think about what, how can you get less and less didn't do well and get more I did awesome at. And really just know that you are always doing your best.
00:41:54
Speaker
And it is, it is, it is a work in progress. When, I mean, 15 years of doing this, you know, it was, it was always something to go through and go, okay, I did good. I did, I did, I did the best I could. And this is what I did best at for this, for this event. Oh, that makes me emotional. Just like telling yourself that like every day, like you truly are doing your best. And that's a great exercise. Where do you see your business in three years?
00:42:25
Speaker
Where do I see my business in three years? I am, I'm actually going to be doing this as soon. So I have, I actually talk about this in my own podcast where I talk about my three, five, my five, three and one year letters in three years. I see myself really focusing on, I'm still focusing on what I'm focusing on now, but adding more things that people can just come in and, and take.
00:42:51
Speaker
and get and implement right away in front of, you know, just this, you know, thing of like, this is, and make it, and make it realistic. I mean, it's not, it's, I am one to tell just to say it. And there's people that don't like what I have to say. And there's people that love what I say.
00:43:16
Speaker
I love it. But in three years, I want to have my, I actually had looked at the URL today, it's the wedding planner educator. And so bring back my teaching, go back to that and teach wedding planners or newbies, whatever, people that want to learn how to become a better wedding planner or just learn about wedding planning is that.
00:43:44
Speaker
I
Podcast Closure and Resource Promotion
00:43:45
Speaker
love it. And where to find you, how to work with you, and one last time about your freebie. The freebie, I really hope it is the best practice sheet. I downloaded it already. It's so good. It's been so long. So the best practice sheet is awesome. Take it, run with it. It is lovely.
00:44:06
Speaker
You can find me at Jen Taylor Consulting on everything. So on Facebook, on Instagram, it's my website's name. And then if you want to hear me rant and rave about more of this stuff, it's the Design Your Wedding Business podcast and the Facebook group that goes along with it. Yeah, go check out your podcast. I would love to be a guest, but good job, Jen Taylor. You did a great job. Thank you. I appreciate it.
00:44:35
Speaker
Thanks for joining me this week on Get a Heck Yes with Carissa Wu. Make sure to follow, subscribe, leave a review, or tell a friend about the show. Take a screenshot and post to IG. Tag me. Also, don't forget to download my free guide on how to become a lead generating machine. See you next time, wedding pros.