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How to Deal with Difficult People (or Just Leave Them There)- Episode 7
56 Plays17 days ago
Khalil and Ali catch up over Eid, questionable sweaters, and the slow unraveling of their patience. In this episode, they dig into what it really means to deal with difficult people whether it’s flaky dates, boundary-crossing friends, or everyday nonsense. It’s less about fixing anyone, and more about knowing when to walk away. No defenses, no apologies, just two queer Palestinians talking it out.
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Transcript
Eid Celebrations and Attire
00:00:06
Speaker
I have to, actually I'm not wearing this.
00:00:11
Speaker
Why not? It's cute. No, because it's Eid and I actually have something, i have like new clothes. i Oh cute. Okay, I'm going to look like a bum. Well, I'm not wearing anything that special. It's just like a slutty sweater that I haven't had the opportunity to wear. So it's like technically new, but I bought it at a thrift store.
00:00:30
Speaker
Nice, nice. Do it, do it. This one is horrible. Whatever. i have it.
Phobias and Humor
00:00:35
Speaker
It's mine. I like I like it. I don't like it. I'm like, put this on. im like, what? It looks like I'm like, do you have the phobia of small holes?
00:00:44
Speaker
I look like I'm going to like rule the capital of the Hunger Games. I'm like, give me your children and I want to watch them fight. ah ah It is giving President Snow. I can see that.
Mental Health and Eid
00:00:58
Speaker
Do you have the phobia of holes? Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah. yeah Apparently not. Okay, because i don't I don't either, but John does. It's so funny. Anyway.
00:01:10
Speaker
Wear the sweater around John. Yeah, that'll drive him mad. ah How are you? How's your week?
00:01:17
Speaker
To be honest, I keep realizing that I'm actually okay and everyone else is in crisis and that's problem. Yeah. Helene keeps rubbing her face on the count on the laptop. I think it's so funny that the episode about mental health is coming out on Eid.
00:01:33
Speaker
Very apropos. Also today's Eid. Eid Mbarak. Hayden Waduk. i there is ah There's a part in the episode where I'm like crashing out and i you recommended I take it out.
00:01:46
Speaker
But I was listening to it again and I was like, honestly, no, this is how I feel. And I was like, i stand by this. was like, there's nothing I said that I don't mean. Okay, I can't remember what that clip was, but I'm excited to watch it and hear it again.
Identity and Unique Experiences
00:02:00
Speaker
why I will say another thing is I'm starting to realize that I live a very niche, I have a very niche experience.
00:02:07
Speaker
And that number one, being Palestinian is very niche. Number two, being gay is very niche. Number three, being gay in the way we are is also very niche. Number four, I'm also out and my parents are horrible about it. So that's also very niche.
00:02:22
Speaker
So it's just like, i'm very unrelatable in a lot of ways. And sometimes that's why I'm like, that's why sometimes I get confused when people don't understand me, but I'm like, because no one, not a lot of people are coming from my world.
00:02:35
Speaker
Right. And who gives a fuck? That's not my, that's not my problem. I agree.
Pet Cleanliness: Dogs vs. Cats
00:02:39
Speaker
I agree. I fucking hate dogs. I'm not a fan. They're so slobbery and like,
00:02:46
Speaker
Not true. Some dogs are very demure. Really? But see, the thing is, is like you're walking them outside and they're going to pee and step in their own pee. And also they're stepping on the floor outside and then you're supposed to bring them into your home where they're going to run into your bed.
00:03:02
Speaker
You know, if cats bite you or scratch, you can get severe infections. Like, right okay, let's not play the game. ro a human If a human bites you, you can also get a severe infection and die.
00:03:13
Speaker
But I think cats are just cleaner. They clean themselves.
Dental Health: Costs and Experiences
00:03:18
Speaker
Yeah, whatever. The Muslim that likes to get fucked in the ass says... Cats are clean. There you go I believe it. Eating ass. Way cleaner than dogs.
00:03:27
Speaker
Dogs, I would, that's like, that's like you walking barefoot outside and then walking into your apartment. he But then just wipe them after. Like, a yeah it's fine. And not all dogs do that. I feel like I don't see dogs constantly rolling in their shit and piss.
00:03:43
Speaker
I remember one time a friend of mine was dog sitting in New York ah so that she can come to New York and like stay at a place for free. And the dog she was sitting, oh my God, the apartment smelled like nasty wet dog.
00:03:58
Speaker
They were two pugs. And poor thing, like the apartment was too small for those dogs. And you can tell they were unhappy and like, Did they shit and piss on a pad like somewhere inside?
00:04:11
Speaker
think there was a pee pad, but they would like, obviously she would walk them and stuff. But still, like the whole thing, like it just really having a dog in a New York apartment is such a choice.
00:04:22
Speaker
Yeah, that's true. Just small space and you're having an animal that requires ah like, like Halloumi literally is content staying in one place. My week is good. I had the dentist appointment the other day and they told me I need to get a root canal.
00:04:38
Speaker
ah Have you had one of those done? I, to be honest, I haven't been to a dentist in like six years. Oh, wow. Wow.
00:04:49
Speaker
You should. You should get cleaned. Like, I think you're supposed to get your teeth cleaned like professionally, like twice a year. The world is not doing that. And like my shoes are like, my teeth are very much fine and like in my mouth.
00:05:02
Speaker
Yeah. Honestly, I think that's a genetic because my genetics are horrible. i am so prone to cavities. Growing up, I've never had a single cavity. Mashallah. Ever.
00:05:13
Speaker
i mean, I'd always get that thing like, aren't you flossing? But I'm just like, whatever. Like, I do my best. Like, I floss here and there now. I brush my teeth every day, sometimes twice a day. Like, they don't hurt me. I don't have, like, abnormal sensitivity.
00:05:27
Speaker
Like, I'm going to treat my teeth like the rest of my body. Like, if an issue pops up, I'll go to the dentist. But, like, I don't go to the doctor. I'm not going to the doctor for regular checkups because doctors will be like, statistically, like, there's probably nothing wrong with you. You're just like...
00:05:42
Speaker
If you have an issue, you're worried. Well, like, right. get over yours i I literally brush my teeth twice a day, floss every day, get my teeth cleaned two times a year. And I still get so many cavities.
00:05:53
Speaker
It is genetic, by the way, like the enamel of your teeth and the bacteria. Truly like I have like dentists are my nightmare. But unfortunately, like this tooth has been killing me.
00:06:06
Speaker
And when it reaches the nerve, it's like everything hurts. and now And now it's like such a big process. So he was like walking me through the steps because I've never had this done.
00:06:18
Speaker
Apparently, a specialist has to like dig all the way into the nerve, pull out the nerve, and then they have to create a crown and like cover the tooth. And apparently, it's going to be like a three-day process. So three appointments.
00:06:31
Speaker
Go see a different dentist. Get a second opinion. No, but I am... i I'm sure this is what it is because... Yeah. Okay, but are you... I've never heard of a root canal being three days.
00:06:42
Speaker
Because they have to... So basically, the crown of the tooth, they have to, like, create in a 3D lab and, like, fit it exactly to my tooth. And then that...
Living Authentically and Societal Norms
00:06:54
Speaker
I feel like they've been doing this procedure is not new. Why is it? Right. Just saying, maybe just talk to a different dentist. Like they this is seems like intense for something that is very routine.
00:07:05
Speaker
i hear It's not routine. It's not routine. I think a root canal is ah actually like a major, I think ah filling a cavity is routine.
00:07:15
Speaker
I have many of those and he said he'll work on them too. But root canal, your cavity should never reach your nerve. But anyway, the whole point of me saying all this is he showed me how much I have to pay out of pocket.
00:07:30
Speaker
And it's a thousand fucking dollars. For the whole thing. And the reason why I asked other people who've had this done and they're like, yeah, unfortunately, even in Kuwait, I asked like my mom, was like, is this what it's like? Because she had one done before.
00:07:47
Speaker
And yeah, it was like 400 KD, which is fucking insane. It's for the stupid like tooth. If you get your teeth cleaned that much, how is it getting to the fucking nerve? what's wrong I'm telling you, it's my stupid ass oral flora.
00:08:03
Speaker
I think since John, so John has also never had the cavity since he was like a child. And since we've been dating, he's had two cavities. So I really think it is a thing, like the biome of your mouth.
00:08:16
Speaker
really is a thing. You know what I mean? Anyway. Damn. I'm just so annoyed by that. More annoyed by the pipe. Hi.
00:08:27
Speaker
Welcome to the Olive people. Hi. I'm Cleo and that's me. Hello. Yeah. he did prescribe my He did prescribe me two weeks of Xanax though.
00:08:43
Speaker
Like a lot before. So that I can like take it the day before and the day of for each visit. So i was like, hell yeah. Anyway.
00:08:55
Speaker
Hello, everyone. okay this is Khalil's episode, so I'm going to let him take the helm. We're OK. I think it's so funny because I think we're talking about how to deal with difficult people.
00:09:08
Speaker
Number one, i want to experiment with like different. I think we've been doing more general topics, but I'm like, why don't we answer questions?
Handling Difficult People and Giving Advice
00:09:16
Speaker
Like I have advice to offer because like low key, I'm thinking about doing something kind of crazy in the summer where I want to just like get outside and have a sign that says free advice and then just like see who comes.
00:09:27
Speaker
But like, I don't know. I also don't like talking to weirdos, so we'll see. But I could also just offer advice on my podcast that I already have. Mm hmm. Mm hmm. So I don't know. It's a topic that interests me.
00:09:40
Speaker
And I think I think a lot of people would classify myself as a difficult person. honestly also wouldn't disagree because I'm principled. I think.
00:09:52
Speaker
Mm hmm. Like, I think I have very strong principles, which makes me in some ways a lot of not flexible a lot, not very flexible. I agree with that.
00:10:05
Speaker
Was that that felt but like it was pointed? Like I'm. No, no, no. I agree. I think I can see how people would see you as a difficult person sometimes because of your influence.
00:10:17
Speaker
But the thing is, there's different types of difficulties. Like, I think I'm very clear in my mission. And I think that having principles also makes people not like you because i think when you point out that something like my principles are actually good principles, like I don't have insane principles. So I think if I point out that something's wrong, then that like makes people feel guilt and shame.
00:10:43
Speaker
And then I think that gets reflected back onto me. And I think rather than me actually being a difficult person, it's just like you just dislike me. But see, what if you have principles, but you don't necessarily impose them on other people?
00:10:58
Speaker
Like, let's say, for example, you disagree with someone. Instead of telling them, you just kind of go like, OK, whatever. Like, it's not your business type of thing. I think the problem is you start discovering people's principles when you're in a relationship. So there's an effort to like, be like, Hey, I know you, you're not actually the person who has this principle, but like your actions are not in line with that.
00:11:24
Speaker
And, you know, and let's move forward because
Dating Apps: Challenges and Honesty
00:11:29
Speaker
then otherwise, i don't know. I can't move forward. What's an example of that? Like, uh, give me an example of that.
00:11:36
Speaker
I think um the easiest way is like dating apps, for example. Like on Hinge, I like met, I was talking to a guy. We had a great chat, blah, blah, blah. Both agreed to go on a date.
00:11:50
Speaker
It was kind of slow responses because um he was he's a like a dancer and was like currently performant like in performance time. So I'd hear back like every two, three days, whatever.
00:12:02
Speaker
And then i'm we're trying to plan this date. I follow up. And then I was like... um my like follow up message was like hey I like I put a playful emoji to this by the way i was like hey um let me know when you're free or just unmatch me at this point because like the image is too much wait I'm gonna finish okay Because the thing is, I'm not here to be like a pen pal.
00:12:30
Speaker
you know what I mean? Like we already had conversation at that point. It had already been like five days. Like I'm kind of like, okay, we both agreed out to do this thing. If we, if you don't have time to get a coffee, then you're probably, this is probably not going to be a match and I'm just going to unmatch you because I'm looking for someone who has some amount of time.
00:12:51
Speaker
Right. So to me, it's just like, it's just being like, hey, do our values align or not? And then he responded with like, hey, that was crazy. That was a crazy message, but like fair.
00:13:02
Speaker
um Saying something about being busy. And then I was like, I don't think it's crazy. I think it's pushy. But again, I'm here for it. You're shaking your head. and I'm here for an agenda. um Blah, blah, blah. And then we exchanged Instagram. Like we had another like nice conversation. We exchanged Instagrams.
00:13:20
Speaker
And then after we exchanged Instagrams, he's like, hey, I think based on your social media, like, um we would just be better as friends. Oh, that's true.
00:13:32
Speaker
That's where, exactly. then that And I was like, hmm, like, that was a really weird thing to say. And I think you're a dishonest person. Yeah. Because... Number one, i can't even get you to meet up with a coffee.
00:13:45
Speaker
Number two, you're being like, let's be friends. But then based off my social media, something like turns you off. And then number three, I'm like, if you looked at my social media, like as a Palestinian right now, like I'm like, what am I thinking? Like, I'm like, are you a racist person?
00:13:59
Speaker
Like, do you like what? Like my pictures on Hinge are from my social media. So it's not necessarily a physical thing. And then he actually referenced the podcast. Yeah. But then I was also like, okay, there's no way you watched a full hour of that. Like, you probably saw, like, five minutes of something. So I was just like, in my mind, I think he thought I was, like, more muscle daddy and then saw the podcast, heard me speak, whatever, like, more cadences, and was like, oh this doesn't, like, line up with my fantasy.
00:14:29
Speaker
And was like, there's no point. But, like, that's just, I could be i could be wrong, but, like, I'm just like presupposing a lot of things. Anyway, my point is a lot of men aren't shit. And like people who I want to hang out with are the people who respond to like me being like, hey, I want to get to know you. Let's hang out.
00:14:47
Speaker
And they don't respond in like a dumb way. So to me, it's kind of like a sifter thing. Like I don't really feel bad about having a fallout with some random person who already it's like there were so many other red flags. Do you know what i mean?
00:14:59
Speaker
Like it ended up being like no harm, no foul. I totally get you. So I have a few points. I'm going to backtrack to the initial message where you said, you said, um so are we hanging out or not? Something like that, right?
00:15:13
Speaker
Yeah. i can Let me tell you from his perspective how he can perceive that. He like there's there's a way to put it where you can still put your message across of like, hey, by the way, like I want to be upfront and let you know, like I'm not trying to waste time. Are you actually available to meet up or are you just on the apps casually? You know, like there's a better way to frame it that doesn't feel like you're coming.
00:15:39
Speaker
Go ahead. I don't care about respectability politics. But then see, so many people, I'll tell you, 99% of people don't like feeling attacked. Go. 99% of people are dumb racists.
00:15:53
Speaker
Then, Khalil, like, I'm trying to tell you, like, in life, you're not going to get what you want if you do what you want all the time.
00:16:05
Speaker
Like, there's going to be moments where you're going to have to think strategically about how you approach people. I understand negotiation, but like off the jump off, if someone's not the spontaneous kind of like, yes, let's do this. Like I can take this kind of thing off the jump.
00:16:22
Speaker
We're never going to make it. We're never going to make it anywhere. Wait, wait, wait. Because there are people who do respond well and things like I know i know when the time is and like I could reflect on past dates, whatever, when i could have been like softer. And that's a ah learning process or like more flexible, I should say.
00:16:43
Speaker
But I'm not on on off an initial hinge match. That's crazy. if Okay, let's say the roles were reversed. And I want you to be honest. If somebody hits you with a direct thing of like why like, what's going on? Like, you know, like it came at you like that.
00:17:01
Speaker
Are you not going to also want to be defensive back? No. The thing is with me, i and I mean, I guess you can call me a liar or not. We either will hang out or I will block you on everything.
00:17:14
Speaker
So like you will get the clear message of like you will be in my life and we will try or not at all. you know what i mean? And there also is room for gray. Like I've met up with people and we're just like, oh, yeah, you're cool. You're cool. But like we just don't click. Like when I go to the gay village here, there's tons of people where it's like, oh, hey, like, hey, girl, like we like each other's Instagram story. Sometimes maybe we reply like we have a conversation. where We see each other out like I have those relationships with like someone.
00:17:39
Speaker
semi whatever's like we just haven't gotten to know each other yet like i don't know what it is you know what i mean yeah and then there's also just the people that you just don't fuck with right right i think i then moving on to the next part where like he followed you on instagram and then there was an issue there i do agree with you i think he's not being fully honest about the reason the reason and i thought saying the reason was stupid No, I agree. I think there's no way we can guess the reason.
00:18:06
Speaker
Like, that's my point is that you think it's maybe because he saw ah video and was like, this isn't what I was expecting. It can literally be anything. And I guess that is annoying when it's like... I didn't ask for it. I'm never a person to ask why because it's frankly none of my business. But if you tell me because of your social media, I'm going to be like, well, what the fuck's wrong with my social media, bitch?
00:18:25
Speaker
right like I would just be like, can you let me know? Can you let me know? like i I would be somebody that would be like, can you let me know like what exactly was it that bothered you? like No biggie, I just want to know.
00:18:37
Speaker
I don't think his reason was right. I don't think that was the real reason. I think he's trying to be, he's sugarcoating whatever it is he actually saw that he didn't like that he maybe thinks he you didn't want to hear.
00:18:50
Speaker
But the thing is, keep it to yourself in the first place. And that's why I don't cry. Because ah again, i don't want to hear some, especially my Instagram, because my Instagram is mine. Like I have already verified improved. I go through it every day looking at myself like, oh my God, I'm so amazing and funny.
00:19:04
Speaker
So then would you ask? I don't want someone else to critique it because I didn't ask for that. If I wanted that, I would ask for it. So then would you have preferred, although I've heard conflict. Okay, wait. So would you have preferred him say, I think we should just be friends? here I do. Okay. If you're any man out there, if you match with me on a dating app and you do not want to end up going on a date, unmatch me from everything.
00:19:25
Speaker
But what if they want to be friends? Like genuinely. Then meet up with me first because here's the thing. the What pisses me off is someone you're I think you're stupid if you see me on a dating app and you're like, OK, this is a person I could be romantically interested with.
00:19:39
Speaker
I look at this picture of this person and this is how guys probably think. Most guys. I would probably fuck this person. Fine. That's all the information I really need personally. Then like there's a whole other dimension of existing, which is let's meet up in person.
00:19:54
Speaker
I'm not going to assault you instantly. Like we could have a conversation, vibe it out. And I've had to have that time where you think you're going to fuck with somebody and then you go hang out on a date and they're like, no.
00:20:05
Speaker
And it ends perfectly fine. And we can have like a amicable thing. But to me, I think it's stupid when someone is kind of just like imposing these limitations when they don't even know me.
Confrontation and Its Long-term Impact
00:20:16
Speaker
Like if you have just seen me on Tinder, if you have just seen me on Instagram, even if you have watched every single episode of this podcast, you ah you don't know me because you have never been with me in a room. And I think you don't know a person until you've like actually sat with them.
00:20:30
Speaker
agree with you on that. You can be like guesses, right? But like you could always be surprised. ah The thing is, and I understand at that point if you've made a decision, blah, blah, blah, but don't tell me. Keep it to your fucking self. And then when you see me in person, in your mind, if that's confirmed, then you just can say that. But you don't have to say, oh, I knew it from your... Do you know I mean? like People don't think I have social attacks. A lot of people don't have social attacks.
00:20:53
Speaker
I think my much more strategic in terms of like actually dating. But we're talking also about not necessarily dating, about how to deal with the people. Okay. ah This is the mind of a difficult person.
00:21:07
Speaker
A beautiful, wonderful, difficult person. Sure. Okay. ah I see what you're saying. It's just, yeah, I have so many thoughts, but I would want to, let's continue on to the next point so that we can.
00:21:22
Speaker
yeah i want get ah Okay. I guess I'm just trying to think how I would deal with the situation. On both sides, like if I was him and I wasn't feeling it versus if I was you and I was annoyed because I've been in situations where I've made a fool of myself, like reaching out to people and being like completely like insisting over and over again when I wasn't taking the hints that they weren't interested. nope this was no but I know I can take a hint.
00:21:50
Speaker
No, no, no, no. This isn't like me sliding into the DMs. We matched on Hinge, right? That is consent already to like, they like, I don't know if I've fucking taken crazy pills, but like people have seemed to lost the plot as to why they are on dating apps.
00:22:09
Speaker
If you want to look for fucking friends, put that in your profile. If you want a fucking friend, go on Bumble BFF. If you want to fucking suck a dick, go on Grindr or be on Sniffies. I do all of those fucking things.
00:22:20
Speaker
Hinge is a very specific app that takes time fill out. I look at people's profiles like I'm not... Like you're actually... you're actually um I'm a very observant, careful person. know what I mean? So the thing is, it's very easy for me to catch someone when they're being like slightly disingenuous.
00:22:41
Speaker
And I pray on that. I see. I know what you're saying. Okay, my other point about this interaction is him telling you... I think we'll be better off as friends because of your Instagram profile and that bothering you. ah What was your response to that to him?
00:23:01
Speaker
It was just like, i you're not a trustworthy person. Because the other thing is too, I will say, when someone says, hey, let's be friends, if you don't follow it up with, let's do such and such on such and such. I agree. i Just like your words of affirmation mean shit all to me. I can call a suicide hotline and have someone tell me the thing. That is very true. you Like, I don't give a fuck if someone says nice words to me. It's like people praise me all the time. That's fine. i know where to get praise. I know how to get praise. Like it's it's it's so I mean, supply demand. The supply is so high. It means very little to me.
00:23:34
Speaker
You know what it is, Khalil? I think you call out what we all know. In the sense, like, in that interaction, I would have probably been like, okay, guess he doesn't like me. And then just never didn't respond.
00:23:46
Speaker
Like, I would have just, like, ghosted or, like, stopped talking to this person. Yeah, you just unlocked me. But yeah, you called it out. You were like, this is fucked up and you're not trustworthy. Like, I literally would never say that to someone. But you're right. Like, that is what that is.
00:24:00
Speaker
i would just let it go. Like, I would just not... Because then what's his response going to be? Like, as in, it's going to enter me into a conversation I don't want. You know what I'm saying?
00:24:11
Speaker
In my weird way, I'm like, ah he could maybe reflect on that and potentially stop being fucking crazy, but it's not for my benefit. It's just like, I think people need experiences. I think people need people to freak out on them. So then like later down the line, they think about it.
00:24:27
Speaker
Because if I think about experiences that I've had, it's like, sometimes it has to marinate for years. And sometimes a couple of things have to happen to couple times for it to like sink in. So it's like, I'll be part of that journey for you. Like I have the time, I'm bored.
00:24:41
Speaker
I fully, ah that I fully agree with you on the idea that like confronted with situations we feel are difficult, like confrontation, sometimes are helpful because they help us reflect on what we said and what we could have said and what we should have said and what we were thinking.
00:24:58
Speaker
Because like respectability politics of always like trying to make everyone feel comfortable isn't always right, especially if you feel uncomfortable by something someone else did. I think it's good to call that out.
00:25:10
Speaker
And that's the thing. People don't like... Because most people, when they're uncomfortable, they're a little bit... They turn inward. I don't want to say cowards, but like to me, it's cowardice. For me, I'm very much like, no, like I need to make this right. Because also, the thing is, I say that... I've said this before. i don't know if I've said this the podcast, but I have quite literally, in my own world, have sacrificed like everything to exist as I am. So like I don't really accept...
00:25:38
Speaker
a lot that is not, you know, something that I want because it's like, I, li I could have lied to my dad when he asked me if I was gay and my life could have been entirely different. Like I would be fucking heiress in Winnipeg with like, you know, family business to take over.
00:25:52
Speaker
But, you know, i just, I made a choice. So, you know, i I like, the thing is, it's like, I'm like slowly, like I'm curating the perfect existence. So it's like, if you're not part of that, if you can't work with that,
00:26:08
Speaker
Yeah. You know? Yeah. You live your life the way you see fit. I am sure a lot of people find that intimidating, but those are not probably the people you want in your life anyway. Like, yeah, no, like, I mean, today I was texting Eid Mubarak and I had, like, so many people that I, like, wanted to send that to, so it was, like, kind of nice.
00:26:26
Speaker
That is nice. And that's just, like, the Muslim people in my life. I didn't send it to non-Muslim. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nor should be. I feel like... Actually, john and John, your mom just texted me, I think, saying, i but like that's so sweet.
00:26:39
Speaker
Anyway, I'll respond to her in a bit, but yeah. Um...
Boundaries in Friendships
00:26:45
Speaker
Yeah, anyway, that that was a that was a good point. Like, you did make good points there, and I do agree. Do we call them out, ignore, or match people's energy?
00:26:54
Speaker
I guess, well, okay, this is dealing with an actual difficult person, though. How do you deal with a difficult person who, like, they don't have a clear objective, they're very much like a toddler in terms of, like, they don't want anything to happen. yeah like, they want A, but to get A, B must happen, but they're like, I don't want B. I have i have a...
00:27:13
Speaker
Fucking perfect example. Okay, buckle up. and So when I was in my previous job, my senior, so somebody who like I worked under basically, she was a lesbian.
00:27:26
Speaker
This is important to the story. from And that's not important to the story. But she was very needy and kind of didn't see, like let's say for example, we had plans to hang out.
00:27:42
Speaker
I'll tell, or not even plans to hang out. She'll message me and be like, hey, do you want to hang out? And I'll say no. She'll be like, why not? I'll be like, I'm just kind of feeling like a lazy day, like just want to watch TV. She's like, oh, well, I can come over and watch TV with you.
00:27:58
Speaker
I'm like, oh, no, I kind of just wanted to hang out by myself. And then she'd see that as me saying... you're not good enough, I don't want to hang out with you, i don't like you, blah, blah. blah You get what I'm saying? Like the type of insecurity where it's like, you're trying to make everything about you, this has nothing to do with you.
00:28:17
Speaker
Your insistence is making me not like you. But like you're not seeing that I'm just trying to vibe by myself. You get what I'm saying? Like somebody who's very aggressively like not seeing that things are happening outside of your world that aren't related to you.
00:28:36
Speaker
Like me doing something or not wanting to do something is because I'm an introvert. It's not because I don't want to hang out with you. I just don't want to, period. And so our friendship, I kind of did the bad thing where I didn't confront the problem for many, many months.
00:28:52
Speaker
And then we were at a house party one day. And she got drunk and I was sitting down and she kept trying to sit on my lap. And I kept being like, no, like I'm good.
00:29:06
Speaker
And she'd like go like walk around and try again. I'd be like, I'm good. Like, I don't want you was sitting on my lap. And she kind of was like, why? Like, don't be weird. I'm just like trying, you know, like I can see in her mind her insecurity of like, he doesn't want me to do this. So I want to do it. Go ahead.
00:29:24
Speaker
There's like a thing where it's like the guys that are like, where am I hug at? But this is the female version. Yeah. I'm like, and then i literally started yelling at her at this party in front of everyone being like, I said, stop.
00:29:38
Speaker
Like, no means no, you don't get to do this just because you're a woman. Like, I don't want you sitting on my lap. And she started crying and made it all about her. Like, oh my God. the Like,
00:29:51
Speaker
The rejection, blah, blah, blah, blah. And I'm like, what the fuck? And she didn't learn her lesson, by the way. She fully thinks i overreacted. And she's she literally, the next day, was like, it's probably a cultural thing.
00:30:06
Speaker
think it actually could be. No, it fucking isn't, Khalil. If there's somebody invading your space constantly, and you're like... Like, no, like, just but be respectful. Like, I'm telling you what I want and you're not listening to me.
00:30:21
Speaker
Go ahead. As a federal ne fellow Middle Easterner, I'm like you. Like, I don't like being touched. Don't fucking touch me. Like, keep six feet. Especially if I don't, especially if I'm not, I don't like you. and Even if I like you, wait, wait, can I finish? But like, in places like China,
00:30:37
Speaker
for example, they're, like, used to being very compact and, like, stuck together. And I think in Latin America, like, those bitches, they grow up being naked around their families. That's fair. Like, their they go in the streets and make out with each other. Like, I'm not saying that's bad. Girl, that's fair. But if I said multiple times, don't do that.
00:30:58
Speaker
Respect it even if you don't understand it. That's the problem. She didn't respect anything she didn't understand. Yeah. That is... Using culture to hide behind her being creepy.
00:31:09
Speaker
ah Using culture to hide behind the fact that she's needy and insecure and, like, want to... And creepy. Like, you're wanting validation you're wanting to feel, like...
00:31:21
Speaker
I like really like you as a friend, but I can show it in my way. I don't have to show it in the way you, you know what I mean? Like you have to learn the way that I like to show that we're friends. Look at how I treat my other friends.
00:31:32
Speaker
I'm not like hugging and kissing them. I'm not like sitting on, this so then why is it, you know, like it's just that, that kind of person. Now I learned to just, when we're, the question is how do we deal with that kind of difficult person? Well, you know what? I've seen you in a techno mosh pit.
00:31:48
Speaker
i I get down. I can party. I can dance. but even But even in those situations, ask John, and ask anyone, I'm like, stay away from me. I'm dancing. I'm listening to the music. I don't want anyone to touch me.
00:32:03
Speaker
Like truly, even in those spaces, I'm fully like locked into the music. Like I have a friend, a good friend. I love him very much who initially was very lovey-dovey touchy. And at some point I told i'm like listen, I don't like dancing with my friends like that.
00:32:18
Speaker
And from then on, that's it. It was so easy. That's a good way to respond to that situation. And that's how I know I can continue to be friends with you. But if you react react like that girl where you make it all about yourself instead of seeing that it's about me, then bye.
00:32:34
Speaker
But you have to cut them out. Because if they don't see it once, twice, three times, they're never going to see it.
00:32:42
Speaker
So cut them out. and No, that's yeah I mean, consent is like someone who doesn't know consent. I think people who like people who are difficult, who don't understand, need to learn through like the severing of relationships.
00:32:56
Speaker
Yes. Yeah. But the thing is, if they have a network of people who kind of accept that behavior and kind of coddle them when someone does do that to them, it's really difficult for someone to learn. Yeah. And also, I think when you're so insecure in your own self, you see that kind of feedback as criticism.
00:33:15
Speaker
As in like me telling her, I don't want you sitting on my lap instead of her seeing it as like, okay, she just saw it as, am I not good enough? Am I not like, you know, like that kind of thing where it's like, ew.
00:33:28
Speaker
God, I hope she was. I hope was. out of married i
00:33:32
Speaker
Because I literally burned that bridge. Like, we obviously, like, are in the same circles because of our job. Sometimes I'm in places where I know she's there and we both avoid each other fully.
00:33:44
Speaker
like, good. I never want to see your face. What's the difference between setting boundaries and being petty?
00:33:55
Speaker
I have a story. Give me your story. and In New York, I went to New York with my ex-bestie and there was a, it's like a GB whatever, some orgy party. And I wanted to go, my friend wanted to go.
00:34:09
Speaker
And my friend was in the like, we cannot both go. And I was like, Why not? Like, I'm not trying to hook up with you. Like, we could just, you know, have territory or whatever, like make a agreement.
00:34:23
Speaker
Because anyway, so he was like, no. And then I was like, I'm going. And like, then you cannot go if that's a problem for you, because like, I want to go to this thing. And like, he had such a fucking tantrum.
00:34:35
Speaker
So I was just like, you know what? Fine. Like, just go. Like, you can go. I don't need to go. Like, it's I'm not going to fight that hard for an orgy. Oh my God, that's actually so strange. That's so unfair. Like he's saying, I want to have this fun experience, but I, like I, because I. That's not a boundary.
00:34:54
Speaker
That's being a petty. I think so No, I don't think that's petty. I think that's him being selfish.
00:35:01
Speaker
Like it's selfish of him to want that experience, but then exclude you out of it. That's a good... that's a good and that's He's a Libra, so Libra bitches, you are known to be selfish.
00:35:12
Speaker
John really isn't. That's so interesting. Oh my god, that's so bad. That is a friend to cut out. Somebody who is only looking out for themselves and like... does it like You're traveling together, right? like To New York?
00:35:27
Speaker
That's unfair. The thing is, i think his he has started going through really hard times and then i the selfishness became worse. Because we had other trips before where it was never that bad. Like, and that's what I'm saying. In Amsterdam, we had been in a dark room separately, but, like, at the same time. So I was just confused at, like, why are you, like, so freaked out?
00:35:50
Speaker
oh It's not going to be that bright in here. That's so interesting. I guess i the thing is, is that if you're traveling with a friend and you feel uncomfortable about going to an orgy with them, then just don't go to the orgy.
00:36:04
Speaker
Do other things. That's what I mean. You're traveling with the friend. think what makes it worse, too, is he had already been to it the night before. That makes it so much worse.
00:36:16
Speaker
ah I tried to fight for it but it's like I'm not gonna have a screaming match and like see the thing is I am strategic like I was just like I fought for it a little bit but I was like we had some traveling left to do so I was like whatever like that i go I would have also been strategic in the sense where I'm like okay whatever like I'm not gonna die on this hill but then after this trip our friendship was gonna go down a level like we're not gonna be the same level of friends no it did not end up recovering yeah yeah so the I think the difference between being petty versus like setting actual boundaries is if your boundaries extend to the actions of someone else, like you're being petty.
00:36:58
Speaker
like you can I really try to follow that philosophy. You can't make anyone do anything they don't want to do. Right. And I think pettiness also stems from not liking someone.
00:37:11
Speaker
Like, I'm trying to think of what pettiness entails. Why would you... know yes Because I think, I do think this friend liked me or likes me, whatever.
00:37:21
Speaker
But I think they were just very selfish. Yeah. yeah And i maybe, like, at that time, maybe they needed it. They were going through a kind of fucked up time. Okay. Yeah. and have to cut this point out.
00:37:33
Speaker
and my Their mom was literally, like...
00:37:40
Speaker
I don't know why I'm laughing. Well, because it's it's like now it kind of makes sense by somebody acting at crazy. being like i yeah yeah I also like October 7th had happened. So I was I need this. all need that. We all are going through our own shit. like it's I know, but like I i get it. i get i I can say I get it, but I also don't get it because they've never had that experience.
00:38:04
Speaker
Yeah, yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't, I didn't get it. It's not a race to the bottom. Like, having your mom and a genocide like, and kind of like, you know, it's really worse for like the world than the other. But like, personally, like from a personal narrative standpoint, I totally being like, who gives a fuck?
00:38:22
Speaker
Right. And you describing in the beginning, talking about the nicheness of your experience.
Concerns About Future Generations
00:38:26
Speaker
I do think everyone is niche in a certain way. And I do think people have different strengths of handling their niche experiences.
00:38:36
Speaker
Like, for example, you might be better equipped to handle your experience than someone else if given the same experience. But we're not all niche, though. Like, okay, the ah if you're straight and you're white, you have a lot of the same problems as a lot of the other straight white people around you.
00:38:54
Speaker
Right. You're probably that ugly and you haven't fulfilled your dreams. Like, go talk somebody else. And you want kids and you want a house. you Maybe you have kids and your kid's a crackhead. Right.
00:39:05
Speaker
Right. That's my nightmare. Having a kid and having them turn out to be, like,
00:39:13
Speaker
Addicted to something scares the shit out of me. But anyway, we we're with tangents. This is a tangent. Let's go back. Let's go back. Okay, so... Honestly? Okay, fine. Boundaries. No, because there's a lot to cover and I want to talk more about... Because there was something you mentioned in your notes about is it fun? Is it ever fun to, like, argue or fight with someone who is, like, difficult?
00:39:37
Speaker
And I really, really, really, really really don't like... Like to me, it's not. It's a, ah let me see where it was. Oh, I really understand that. Yeah. Are some types of difficult people fun to fight with? No, no, no.
00:39:49
Speaker
Fighting with people. And I think you're the same way. really takes a lot out of out of me. Like it really exhausts me and makes me like, like I don't want to feel that kind of emotion all the time. i really don't. And I think you're the same because the few times we fought, I can tell like your energy. Like the thing is we've actually fought.
00:40:10
Speaker
Yeah. People think me fighting them is me talking to them like this. No, we, uh...
00:40:20
Speaker
Oh my god. Yeah, no, that's actually fighting like out for blood, like... Yeah. Like it's not fun. As violent as you can get with words before literally like hitting each other is like me what fighting is. And yeah, you're right.
00:40:36
Speaker
It's not fun. I like, I like debating. I like being like Dennis the Menace, like little shit, like kind of like more playful jabs. Yes, yes. I think that's enjoyable. I think it's enjoyable to fighting.
00:40:50
Speaker
There's fighting and there's play fighting. And I think both go with words. Right. And in play fighting, too, sometimes people accidentally get hurt and it's like, oh, I didn't need to hit you like there. Yeah. Yeah.
00:41:02
Speaker
Yeah. ah What about you? what Do you feel like there's a difference between somebody who's difficult and somebody who's evil?
00:41:14
Speaker
It's hard to tell. I haven't met somebody who's like evil. ah I'm like thinking of people but who are evil, but I always you can always kind of understand that they have like a story, you know. So are they evil?
00:41:27
Speaker
This is why I don't believe in religion. It's like so hard to like see how people are completely like garbage, garbage, garbage. Like I mean, some actions are irredeemable. Like you should be shot. But it's like I'm not going to shoot you in the back of the head thinking like I'm killing the scum of the earth.
00:41:43
Speaker
Right. yeah are yeah like You're talking about the Islamic stories of Quraysh and like all the like I'm thinking of all the people who used to like worship the like idols.
Evil, Ignorance, and Trauma
00:41:55
Speaker
They used to describe them in my religion class as evil, the pits of the earth, these dumb people that don't know to read and write and they're horrible. And i'm like in my mind, i'm like they probably were just living their life.
00:42:08
Speaker
but they weren't like What happened to all being like God's children? like Jesus Christ. I agree. i'm like There's a part of it where I'm like, just let them be. They didn't know any better. like For example, if you really think that this form of religion is right, give them grace. like Not everyone...
00:42:26
Speaker
You know, it's it's like, yeah, I feel like it's ungraceful to assume somebody's evil. That's what I mean. That's any form of insecurity. It's like if we're doing the same things and I have to kill you in order for my thing to be the best thing.
00:42:38
Speaker
It's like, clearly, I just thought you could outcompete me. Right. Like, I don't know what other way there is to get around that. Like, in the end, if you really believe in Allah, like, we'll all see. And that's what I mean. It's like, why be mean to someone when in the end we're going to all find out?
00:42:53
Speaker
but So like, still that, like we had this issue kind of on our own podcast with difficult people. ah When we posted that clip about so being in the masjid, which I knew would get some Islamic rage bait.
00:43:05
Speaker
And like, I, we did get some issues like, and and I tried talking the people being like, if literally people are being bombed in tents right now, and these people claim to be also living in the Middle East, i'm like, you literally have bigger fish to fry than, like, sitting on your phone, like, saying you want to do horrible things to me.
00:43:22
Speaker
And they literally just kind of admitted that they were, like, bored and, like, alone. Like, oh like like That's so sad. That is so sad. There's a version of person who has not dealt with their own feelings or even trauma where they like taking it out on other people to make themselves feel better.
00:43:40
Speaker
So he probably, and that's most people I know like most people back home who like hate other religions, who think gay people should die, who blah, blah, blah. It all stems from the fact it makes them feel better.
00:43:53
Speaker
To think that you're less than them. To be like, I'm better than you. And instead of... you know what I mean? Instead of coming at it from a human way and being... well it's like not like I think people are difficult because even with my own friends, like when they have like... For instance, I had a friend whose cat passed away. Like I wish people were better at bringing people in when they're feeling down rather than isolating themselves.
00:44:14
Speaker
And like people do that like... Also, it's just like there is ah there people want to feel so isolated by either being mean to somebody or like withdrawing yeah rather than like being like, oh, we're all kind of garbage together. Like there's much more poor people living in horrible conditions than, you know, people living like us. Right. or like I mean, even people like living like us, like ah like there's very few Kim K's and Elon Musk's.
00:44:41
Speaker
There's so much more relatability to be had than... um judgment and issues but also like people don't want to give they don't devote the time or energy so then it's like if you're not going to devote the time and energy then like go fuck yourself that's the thing time and energy but i also think it's like a concentration thing like you have to actively do it every time like everything you do you have to be very understanding that someone else's circumstance means nothing to you like you Your life is your life. Their life is their life. You're all living in the same space.
00:45:16
Speaker
Just chill, you know, like don't make it all about you. I think people make it all about themselves and forget like they think the person in front of them is an NPC when like, no, they actually have the whole universe that you don't know about.
00:45:30
Speaker
You know what I mean? And this is where capitalism comes in because it has separated us from like making our lives more intertwined. Like we would give a shit about the baker who's sick down the street if it was like the main local bakery. Right. Where's, you know, Bilas, the baker. Right. How are his kids?
00:45:50
Speaker
Oh, my God. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah. Absolutely. Absolutely. ah We watched the documentary, No Other Lands, the one that won the Oscar, whatever. And in it, they showed like scenes of the village and how they're so interconnected. I was like, damn, that is so nice.
00:46:07
Speaker
Like, that is really nice that they all know each other. When one person's house is demolished, they all work together to rebuild everything. at night and the women will start building in the morning because the soldiers are less likely to fuck with them and then at night the men will you know what i mean and it's just like that's such a beautiful example of people just coming together and yeah just understanding each other's pain because they're all going through it they all know what it's like so immediately they know what has to be done
00:46:39
Speaker
And Allah is sufficient. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, in their minds as well. That's probably how they feel. But that's another thing I think that makes people difficult is a sense of entitlement.
Fundamental Human Rights and Social Behavior
00:46:51
Speaker
Yeah, feeling like they're owed something just by existing. how you are you What do you think people are owed? Water. Healthcare. care
00:47:06
Speaker
Shelter. Education.
00:47:12
Speaker
I'll add to that entertainment. Okay. Right. win But I feel like by getting those things, automatically entertainment comes to. Do you know what I mean?
00:47:22
Speaker
And you think it should be like, like, cause in every situation, let's say okay, I love doing this experiment where like the world just becomes like, we're like back to living in a tribe. Like, I feel like leaders will emerge and kind of dictate how time is spent.
00:47:36
Speaker
So I think there should be conscious effort to like, be like, to allow to rather than like, people having to like scurry around a dictator to have their fun, like be like open and like actually be like designate, you know, fun time in the village. Now we're like getting together and everyone has to sign up for the talent show. That's what I would do with like Meteor 2.0 happens and I somehow survive and I gather a group of people and then I have them under my command.
00:48:05
Speaker
We make talent shows on Fridays. Absolutely. Going back to the dentist, you get to pick like a video to watch. And I picked Animal Planet. And the video that was playing was like monkeys and how they socialize and their herds.
00:48:19
Speaker
And they do that where like they're like working, but at the same time, they might stop and like start picking at each other's bugs and just chattering, like talking. And like that is so, like that is such a vibe. Like you're actively like your whole day is just like gathering food and then also like vibing with the people you're with, you know, and everyone's doing something.
00:48:40
Speaker
And I think that that's the thing. Everyone has to start doing something. The problem is when selfishness creeps in and one person starts doing less, and benefiting off of everyone else's work.
00:48:50
Speaker
And then I think that's how all that negativity is introduced when one person isn't contributing their part. And I feel like that throws things off. What would you do to that one person if you were the leader in your overseer situation?
00:49:07
Speaker
If like you're noticing someone is not doing what everyone else is doing and they're not... Like, are you going to accept that and allow it? You're just like, oh, he's just like the bum, whatever.
00:49:21
Speaker
i think, okay, so this is going to come from like, okay, we tried to find out why, blah, blah, blah. And I think ultimately if it comes down to... This is kind of where it gets a little dark, where I think ultimately you might have to banish them.
00:49:36
Speaker
I was going to, I'd do the same. I think it, I think. Like, okay, you have to go find another place where you you feel more comfortable and your values aligned and you feel more like energy to engage because maybe you're feeling lazy because you don't like any of us.
00:49:47
Speaker
And if you don't like any of us, just leave. Right. I do think that is important to do because if you leave a parasite, well, we're getting really...
00:49:58
Speaker
Because if you leave someone like that, it will eventually creep into everyone else's lives where everyone else feels the burden. And yeah, everyone has to have their place. they And that's literally how the world, that's how war started.
00:50:12
Speaker
yeah what happens world It started off as a little summer camp and then everything was going good and then some bitch got lazy and then there's issues and now there's problems. Yeah, and or or like infidelity or like some kind of, yeah.
00:50:26
Speaker
No, but those things can be solved and worked through. Yeah. But like, what if somebody, for example, steals or like took someone else's thing or like harms? It would not be a thing because it's like, if we're like living off of things that are just like made from around us, it's like all abundant.
00:50:43
Speaker
Right. That's true.
00:50:47
Speaker
That would be right. How could you steal if there's no private property? No, you're right. You're right. Well, that would be nice. Okay. I could be, but I think it's too late. We lost all the skills.
00:51:00
Speaker
We're done. I agree. i wouldn't know. Pack it up. I'd probably die from the first berry I eat if I lived in the wild.
Survival and Social Expectations
00:51:09
Speaker
Genuinely, i I think I would just kill myself. I don't think I would try. i don't want to suffer. Yeah, same here.
00:51:17
Speaker
Anyway, that's kind of funny. Right, guys?
00:51:22
Speaker
What types of difficult people? There's people who complain all the time. Oh, yeah. one, no. Fake nice person and the person who brings drama. Does that trigger anything in you? I think ah for me, difficult people, i can as long as if I can figure out what is the source of their difficultness, what is their damage, I think I can relate to them more. it's when i like There's a difficult person at my work who isn't difficult for the reason you think. He's just a straight man and has straight thoughts and straight conversations. And to me, that's difficult.
00:51:57
Speaker
Like, I literally don't relate to you. I don't want to talk to you. And i don't understand where you're coming from because your problems all seem so pathetic. Like, he picked to stay he picked to stay in his current workplace because his dad told him to.
00:52:14
Speaker
I'm like, you're 28. Or probably much older. I'm 28. He's probably like... i'm twenty eight he's probably like In his 30s. it's like, wait, why?
00:52:25
Speaker
Why are you doing some... Like, you're such a one-cell being right now where you're just doing what... He told him to do it, so he's doing it. And he does he didn't, like, give you his opinion on the matter? No, I could tell he would have wanted someplace different. But he's like, oh, you know, well, my dad said it would be a good opportunity and I should do it.
00:52:44
Speaker
It's like, bubble blah, blah, blah. I'm like, okay, that's a weird thing to say as a 30-something-year-old. But then also, he I don't know. Like I can tell. Okay, here's what it is.
00:52:55
Speaker
I can tell he's living his life not for himself, but for other people. That to me is a type of difficult person that's like sad to deal with. I think that's because, I mean, maybe don't think that hit home as like a queer Muslim person.
00:53:09
Speaker
Probably. I mean, like if I was straight, I would probably have made choices that aligned more with what my society dictated than what I wanted. But now that I started making choices or I do make choices that are for my own enjoyment, I cannot even imagine...
00:53:25
Speaker
living my life for someone else. Like doing, like that to me is such a weird concept. That's a person I don't relate to and I'm unable to like be friends with or connect with because I'm always going to be like, and it's not, it's not because i don't like them. It's just purely because we don't align on so many things.
00:53:45
Speaker
I agree. I mean, I think I'm the exact same way. and I think it even goes as to far as there's some gay people aren't even like that all the way because some people will come out, bluh blah, blah, blah, as a rebellion, but then they kind of jump into like the mainstream. They're not gay in their own way. They like jump from like one society to another rather than jump from like one society like outside at all to the south.
00:54:09
Speaker
yeah don't jump from Don't jump from one society to another. Jump from one society to yourself. Yes. Like, for example, totally know what you're talking about, like the whole gay culture of like, you adopt this persona that you think is what being gay is all about.
00:54:23
Speaker
But it's like, is that what you're all about? Like, you have to do what you want to do. who Oh, I'm going to be a, I'm a jock. Cause I have muscles and blah, blah, blah. Or the person who's like, I'm a twink and blah, blah, blah. Or like, I'm more femme. So like, you know, I have to be like this, like, or like, I feel like a lot of, um, like ethnic men will get like stuck in these category categories sometimes, yeah like from Asian men being, um, infantilized to like middle Eastern men being, um,
00:54:56
Speaker
like not like brutalized but like treated it as like you know masked on tops or like um black people and like bdl ashes like all that shit so it's just like there's a lot people will try to impose on you of what they think you should be exactly so it's really hard not allow yourself to just like go with it yes it's like the labels the labels that people put just based on your appearance or where you come from If I had a nickel for every time somebody tried to compare me to some fucking type of animal, whether a bear, a mater yeah yeah otter, bear, otter, cub, like what is Khalid's body type is staying on these people's minds.
00:55:37
Speaker
I think it's so weird when people are categorizing people based on their appearance.
Dealing with Assumptions and Stereotypes
00:55:43
Speaker
Because you might look a certain way and totally be like whatever. Like you can be into anything. There's no just because you look some kind of way doesn't mean you're going to be into something. I don't know.
00:55:56
Speaker
Whatever. and i'll But that's what I mean. That's where my ego comes from because I'm like, wow, thank God I'm not like one of these people. yeah Yeah, I do think that is a kind of difficult person I don't tolerate.
00:56:07
Speaker
Every other kind of difficult person, be it like irritating, obnoxious, whatever, i tend to ignore. like I tend to just... If I find that you're not pleasing and not like making me feel good, I'm probably just going to be nice to you, but not...
Workplace Relationships
00:56:25
Speaker
like Like that straight guy, for example, me and one of my coworkers were like this and we'd like do everything together. The second he walks into a room, we go quiet.
00:56:35
Speaker
And we can't be having fun because then he'll be like, hey, what's going on? And you'd be like, oh, we don't. He'll literally be like, hey, how are you guys? Good. How are you?
00:56:46
Speaker
Good. it's Good. What you guys do this weekend? Nothing much. What about you? Like, literally like that. Like, ah we'll just act like we just don't have a personality.
00:56:58
Speaker
Did you hear the new Bad Baby song where she's like, you think I'm dumb enough to tell you anything? I wouldn't tell you what color socks I got. Something like that. Exactly. Why would I tell you anything?
00:57:08
Speaker
I just don't want you to know my life and I don't want to know yours. So...
00:57:15
Speaker
But maybe you should tell him that. Like, I find you unrelated. But see, that's the difference between us. I just don't find it necessary to put that much energy into helping him. I wouldn't do that.
00:57:27
Speaker
Because it's on a dating app when we're forced to, like, where I'm like, oh, I've already, I'm trying to, like, get to know you. Let me help you. Versus a colleague where it's like, we've never clicked from the jump. It's like, yeah, I'm just going to stay. Exactly.
00:57:38
Speaker
Yeah. mean, that could be the episode. I feel like we've had such a productive conversation about this topic. And I think people will learn. So you all better be studying.
00:57:51
Speaker
Okay. I'll show music. Wait, wait, before that, let's so give them a prompt. I know that no one has been commenting on that. But let's still give them a prompt. See, Gabriel, it's hard. it's go to but Listen, between me and you, this is a slow burn.
00:58:05
Speaker
Yes. Cue Casey Musgraves' Little Burns. Such a good fucking song. Anyway.
Celebrity Feuds and Entertainment
00:58:13
Speaker
what do you guys what What do you guys do when you're faced with a difficult person?
00:58:19
Speaker
That's our question. yeah Are you like me, the confrontational? Are you like Ali, the little bitch? I mean, I'm confrontational too. I can be confrontational. I think that, or rather, it's more, are you... You take a lot more for you to be confrontational, I feel like.
00:58:34
Speaker
my I'm much more quick to it. I'm much more quick to issues. And I think you're much more quick to work around them, trust them. I'll like wait. try to like sweet I'll wait. Yeah, I'll wait and see.
00:58:47
Speaker
Yeah, which one are you and what do you do? I do have a media moment as well. I've been listening to Billie Eilish Hit Me Hard and Soft. I heard that album, her most recent one's pretty good.
00:58:59
Speaker
um Yeah, go listen to Bad Baby. Listen to Bad Baby or listen to Billie Eilish. Honestly, the Bad Baby Alabama Barker beef, like they both of them have released tracks. Bad Baby has won that beef.
00:59:11
Speaker
So just for reference, Alabama Barker is Travis Scott's daughter. So this is the Kardashians are involved. Oh, wow. Yeah. So Alabama Barker is this little white girl from Calabasas who wants to be a rapper and then became friends with Bad Baby and then they had a fallout.
00:59:26
Speaker
And Bad Baby released a diss track and then Alabama Barker released a diss track. And then ah then Bad Baby came back with three other diss tracks and like literally put this bitch into the dirt. Like...
00:59:39
Speaker
like he's like I am not quitting like I love that I really respect when someone like when someone does something to you like you spit at me I'm gonna spit at you times 10 yeah yeah I feel you and Bad Baby would be besties I think Alabama Barker fucked Bad Baby's baby daddy so like oh that's pretty serious Bad Baby has a baby?
01:00:01
Speaker
yeah i Yeah, she does. Damn. okay She also had cancer at one point. Oh, shit. She's been through a lot. She's literally like a child. How is she... and on dr phil she has a kid and she has cancer oh my god that's like best diss tracks of like all time that's so funny that's so funny miss whitman is the best one okay i'll give that one a a whirl all right this is our episodes the what what what is the title of this episode how to deal with difficult people right right right like gonna be in the title
01:00:37
Speaker
Sweet. And this is the Olive People podcast. I'm Ali. That's Khalil. Thank you guys for listening and see you next week. Bye, olives. We have to remember we're calling them olives now. Yeah, our little olives.