Transcript
Speaker: All right, it's going. Great. I think I've had the first word on every episode so far, so it was very gracious of you to say, all right. Not the first one. Yeah. On the first one, I started it. Yeah. It's nice. ah You could have picked something a little bit better than, all right, it's going. Well, no. I mean, I could just i could just cut it so that it starts with whatever the most interesting thing is for it. Maybe Matthew will say something interesting to start us off.
Speaker: I always try to get a lay of the land and listen to you You know what's going on, what we're talking about. Before you cleverly snipe. Yeah. I'll add something. that could That could be the first line. That's a great first line. I'll add something. I'll add something.
Speaker: Yeah, that's nice. We're just adding things together. Right. The first edition. Yeah, the first edition is its own thing. You know, it's like you need tinder and kindling and all of that to add the first flame. But like once the fire is going, you're just adding logs or boy scouts. Yeah. If you're talking about Boy Scout fires, which are similar to Girl Scout fires, Boy Scout fires are sort of the prototype of all fires or of all processes. Of all processes. yeah I was never really into fire as a boy. I don't know. I mean, I know that's like a common psychopath trait in like TV shows and stuff, but i I didn't like fire to be honest. And I don't know if I like it now.
Speaker: Fire is truly one of my favorite things. I love being the white fire keeper. Not that the whiteness has a lot to do with it. I don't know what that is. I think it's something that... Race nationalist thing that you came up with? I think it's something that POC notice in white culture that there's always the white boy who loves to keep the fire going. And I like satisfying that archetype. But isn't that also what the Roman statues with glowing eyes guys say is we're keeping the fire of Western civilization going?
Speaker: I'm just keeping like the fire going adjacent to the hot tub at the Airbnb. That's like mine. It has nothing to do with civilization. It's just like you're like a hot... In fact, I... What about this fire? It's not an object. You're like a hot...
Speaker: Not substance. You're like a reaction, a chemical. You're like hot gas. What the fuck is it? Or is it gas? Fire is a process by which organic material turns to ash. Yeah, right. You're like a hot process. You keep the process going. Fire is simply a a conversation between organic matter and the atmosphere. Not always.
Speaker: um Surely there are fun exceptions. Yeah, pigeonhole fire. If psychopaths are interested in fire, there's interested in fire as children. I thought they were interested in um slicing off animals or slicing parts of animals off. They have they have a couple... Interest. They torture little animals, right not just slaves. Fire. I think they're annoying. Bedwetting or parents' bed sleeping, I think. Well, i think i don't I think they say bedwetting is the third, but I think that a lot of ah psychos have also had ah slept slept in their parents' bed for too long. I will say that I have all three. They went their parents bed they wake up. Well, they would wake up in their parents' bed.
Speaker: We don't know where they would sleep per se, but evidence suggests that they would wake up in their parents' bed. They would wake up in the bed and covered in piss, because they pissed their pants.
Speaker: That's right. They would piss their parents' bed. That's like the worst that's like the the bonus level of the dark triad. They probably start off in their own bed and they piss that and then they switch to parents, dry dry off with on the parents. and then probably If the parents wake up and the house is on fire and the bed is full of piss, you probably have a psychopath for a kid. Yeah. yeah What is the child who's interested in water? like kind of Dampening things down with that.
Speaker: That's the opposite. That's like the empath. That's the, was it indigo child? Indigo children like to kind of dampen things. Children who like to catch things on water.
Speaker: They like to start water. They like to start water and heal animals and will not sleep in their parents' bed despite how how much the parents beg. Yeah. They will wake their parents up and they wake the parents up and dry the bed. just to say Even if the parents, of are not sopping wet, they will further dehumidify. Yes. It would make sense that they are so um they that they're so kind to helpless animals because their bed is so dry and covered with dead skin flakes from their constant chafing that they basically share their bed with dust mites. They're very dry, but the environment around them is very wet. That's right. Because all their moisture is expelled outward. Right. I've already talked on the podcast about how torture ants, and I have just now admitted that I love fires. I don't really love starting fires in in ah civilized indoor spaces, but I do like being the fireplace guy.
Speaker: And I definitely did sleep in my parents' bed for too long. I was an only child and I was afraid of aliens. I was afraid of getting abducted. So I slept in my parents' bed for a long time. So I am um a dark triad guy. Well, you had a good reason to sleep in the parents' bed. Yeah.
Speaker: I guess you could say I had a good reason to be harming ants. I was bored. You thought they were aliens. I thought they were evil. You never harmed greater beings. I was going to say, you wouldn't harm an ant if it were... If it were a dog. If it were a dog -sized ant, I suppose I would harm it. No, we should kill that fucking thing. That's scary. We should just harm it.
Speaker: We should just teach it a lesson. If there's a monster, we should simply hurt it. Don't kill it, because monsters are interesting. and other they' interesting Yeah, interesting. And monsters are like very satisfying to have in the physical realm. Because otherwise, monsters are... You'll just never meet a monster. And if you do, you should count your lucky stars and not not kill it. but You're right. If we had if we had ah a thousand monsters in the physical realm, we wouldn't have them in the mental realm.
Speaker: Well, we could have them in the mental realm and then well every Christmas we could celebrate by harming a monster. That's a really good point though. If we stop imagining monsters, maybe they'll be real. Right. Do you guys think that someone could be so, I mean, like, uh, like, do you guys think the elephant man is a monster? Yeah. So there, I mean, there are, they're just freaks, right? They're just mutants. We're supposed to say he's not, but it's, but he is so interesting.
Speaker: Well, you're just supposed to say, like, why wouldn't you want to race it? Anyone in the physical realm is is not a monster. It's an animal. The elephant man is an animal. He's an animal. The reason monsters don't exist really is because ah anyone who's that hideous and ugly is always a sweetheart. They're never evil and they're barely ever strong. Unfortunately. They're barely ever able to wield weapons with ah with dexterity. They're like, the weapons are always sliding out of their misshapen hand. The alpha man looks like he has like he's he would be impervious to like arrows and in blades, but actually his his big deformed face is weaker than our own faces.
Speaker: Yeah, yeah's true you press your thumb into his forehead and it leaves ah an imprint for the next several days. yeah like he face can be He can be messed up. yeah next up easily yeah He be easily molested, bothered and annoyed. He's like a gusher left out in the sun. I mean, that's the other thing about monsters is that it's actually not like a boss battle in a video game. They're remarkably easy to harm and kill. And that also goes against
Speaker: The real monsters of this world are ill and easily harmed, and they're not fire -breathing and they don't have special abilities. Well, even if they had special abilities, it's like vampires. you just you go ah They take them outside or whatever. yeah you They sleep all day. You can just like take them outside and just use use their weakness. People always forget about the weaknesses of beings.
Speaker: Yeah, we're always thinking about the strengths of monsters and we forget that they always have a glowing red weak point. ha Otherwise they wouldn't be monsters. What's Godzilla's month ah weak point? Godzilla's weak point. He has a few weak points, but he has a, and one movie has a brain in the base of his tail that can, like he has a secondary brain that can be targeted. And then in ah another way. It's a secondary brain. Why would that be his weak point? and He can just lose it.
Speaker: Right, but I think eliminating a second brain might make you like spasm and seize. Although that would be quite dangerous if ah if a monster like that was spasming and seizing. Right. It wasn't a good idea. I personally would have inter inter intervened in the ah Japanese Self -Defense Forces a strategy meeting and said, it's not worth it, guys. um And then I guess his weakness is other monsters, very powerful monsters.
Speaker: So damage okay after certain yeah at a certain point, damage doesn't go a week. But he always tends to triumph over his adversaries. so Because they're like worse or something? They're not as good. I haven't seen enough Godzilla stuff, so I don't really know why. I don't even know why the monsters fight. You know the size, right? They're big, yeah. No, they're even bigger than you're imagining. They're like bigger than... ah Well, they're bigger than how they are how they're depicted, for sure.
Speaker: They're bigger than the TV. they're bigger Yeah, they're way bigger than they appear to be on TV, and way bigger than the TV. It's sort of like the God, I guess. like They say God is so great in this little book, but it turns out he's if you really met him in real life, he would be even kind of more impressive. The book underplays it. Yeah. On purpose. Yeah. Because they want you to be happy when you meet him. They want you to be really happy. Really happy. Oh, you're way better than I thought. That's why the Bible is so popular, it makes people happy. I just remember this ah situation where I was telling Matthew about this person that I did not like, and I was forced to hang out with this person. And they did something, they made a face that ah was kind of, it made me laugh, they made a silly face and like they really committed to it.
Speaker: And then I said, oh my God, I had no idea that you could do that. That's that's so great. And I told Matthew that and he said, yeah, no one likes to hear, I had no idea you were excellent. It's like a very rude thing to say to someone. I thought I was being nice, but I just revealed, hey, I've never liked you once in my life, except for now you're kind of starting to grow on me.
Speaker: Just to clarify, you really did like their silly face. I really did like their silly face. It definitely wasn't, it didn't move the needle substantially, but I just wanted them to know that they had moved, they had moved it.
Speaker: Was the thing about it the the expression or the fact that they they held on to it? It was the fact that I thought that this person was a complete dud, that that they even had the ability to be silly, and then the idea that they knew how important it was for them to be silly. It wasn't like that impressive as far as silliness goes, but you're impressed that they had the ability to be a bit off.
Speaker: yeah definitely And ah yeah, it felt like ah basically like a private lap dance because I'm a kind of person who loves silliness. And it was almost like they reached out to me telepathically to say, you know, this is for you, buddy. It is like a private lap dance, huh?
Speaker: You know how private lap dances are are always happening spontaneously? Yup. Yeah. In the middle of social situations? Yeah. Well, it doesn't count if you kind of have to initiate it. I know. Isn't that the thing? The sentence, do you want a lap dance or do you want a blowjob? is There's no more like horrifying words. When you hear the sentence, it's like, well, now I don't want it.
Speaker: it's like this It's like this classic thing when your girlfriend and you are both like horny and and a horny and hyped. And then she says, don't picture an elephant. Yeah, ruins. Or improved. It depends. ah It does whatever Pierce was trying to say. Yeah, it does what you what you meant. That ruins things in your partnership.
Speaker: Did that not come across? You guys know what I'm talking about? Don't picture an elephant. i I understand, but I think I would still... ah You would still give that joke some padding. Oh, like would I engage with the joke while vlogging sex? lovinging set well i have I have the thing where if I try to think of an apple, I just think of like a gray circle or whatever. So it would be really easy for me to not not picture an elephant.
Speaker: You think of a gray circle and someone standing next to it yelling, this is an apple. I swear, I swear to God. It starts as a gray circle and then like a guy comes in with a chisel and it just takes like 20 minutes for him to like make it into an apple. Yeah. I have a picture of the guy perfectly though. The detailed visualization of vagueness. Yes. The apple that you're picturing, your mind is working hard to let you know it's not a real apple. This is an artificial apple that we're trying to make for the purposes of visualization. Yeah. I don't want my mind to trick me. Well, that's what's happening, though. Your mind isn't growing an apple by putting an apple seed in the soil. You're saying that a guy is chiseling it. He's chiseling something I know that isn't an apple into a facsimile of an apple. You basically have a mind full of androids. There's nothing real in there. But it works, Derek. You're still able to think.
Speaker: I don't know how it works. I don't know how it gets from nothing to this. I'm not pulling all the levers. That's all I'll say. My girlfriend was saying, um, she listened to all the episodes of this podcast and she was saying that it's funny, but it's hard to follow cause there's no structure.
Speaker: Who cares? Structure. No, we can structure beginning, middle, and end. right We just need to be very conscious. and are we still and We're still in the beginning, I guess. We're towards the end of the beginning. How would we structure this? i mean if if she if she had her way i mean what would What kind of rails are we talking about? No one's kind of going like, okay guys, let's get on to the next question. I mean, I try to do that sometimes, so it feels bad. Her feedback is, I'm glad that she gave you that feedback. It's definitely feedback that's aimed toward you. You're the host. I think all of our listeners can agree. I hate to do that. And you don't do a good job. You just don't. And I don't care. I don't want to be hosted, but you are a fundamentally
Speaker: objectively bad host. Who cares is my opinion. I love you no matter what. Appreciate that. Sit with that. Sit with that. You're a bad host. It's okay. I'm bad at it. I don't like doing it. I want someone else to do it. How about this? i I'll try to be the host.
Speaker: and You're going to host us?
Speaker: I think you're a good host. I think you're like a liberal dad. Maybe we need like a bell. Wait, why am I liberal? Why am I a dad? Not politically liberal. I mean, you don't punish.
Speaker: ah Okay, so you indulge you basically every day is candy day for me and Matthew and You're just you're just hoping you can get to bed on time No, I think we should we should go very strong We should the next episode episode should be structured by the minute to the minute That would be a very good idea. medium but yeah to them Maybe like a a bell or something that goes off. Every minute. yeah Every minute. and And then we say, okay, we're done talking about... Because we we do talk about a lot of different things. like We talked about a dog -sized ant.
Speaker: I forgot everything else, but you know, that could be its own minute. And then we say we're done now. done one Yeah. Let's not use associative thinking, uh, to kind of generate a a next topic. Let's end this be done. right And now let's begin at a new point.
Speaker: All right, let's do our first question, fellas. What do you think? That sounds great. And at this point, I'm just going to make a note here that I would like to get a theme song going. So these are like my little host housekeeping things. Are you writing that down? Where are you writing that? Just on my notes app. So here we go. This is our first question. It comes to us from the Chamber of Reason Discord.
Speaker: And I... Okay, you're doing you're doing a pretty good job posting so far. I'm going to save the image. You're like you're like a strict dad. You remind me of my dad. Well, you're like a substitute teacher that comes in and they know exactly what they're doing. Yeah. Okay, so you can't actually attach images to the chat. and one well I'm in the Discord. This is pointless. Matthew, can you open the Discord on your end? Matthew, do you know we have a Discord?
Speaker: ah Yes. I don't have Discord installed though. don't We should edit that out. Don't let the viewers know. All right. I've found a way to copy this just using my OS. Oh, wow. And we can basically we can basically cut all of that crap where I didn't know what was going on. So this question comes to us from our debate religion. Matthew, Derek, who wants to read this? I'll read.
Speaker: Uh, this is from, what is it? Where's it from? You already said. But where's it from again? It's from Reddit. It's from Reddit. Hard debate religion. This is from Reddit. This is from the debate religion. This is a website where you debate religion. Yeah. Reddit. It's a website. Reddit is a website. Reddit is a website where you debate religion.
Speaker: Read it as an orange website where you're allowed to post. And read as I will as i will do. Is there any evidence of religious behavior in animals? All I assert that religion is one of the few things that separates man from the animals. A recent theory is that religion is an adaptation of mankind that allows him to live in societies, etc.
Speaker: If that's true, one would expect to see a similar adaptation somewhere in the animal kingdom, particularly in highly intelligent social animals like whales, wolves, apes, etc. So my question is this, is there any evidence of religion in the animal kingdom?
Speaker: Hmm. I like this question. Yeah. I actually truly do think this is a great question. Yeah. I adore it. But I don't know. You don't really know. It's funny to use the word evidence for a question like this because obviously we're outside of the parameters of evidence. We're talking about whether or not something that doesn't think can believe in something that doesn't exist.
Speaker: um It feels more like a springboard for imagination, like what kind of religion would a cat have? It's it's kind of stupid because they're saying a it's an adaptation of mankind. If that's true, one would expect to see a similar adaptation somewhere in the animal kingdom. It's like, that doesn't make sense. It's like pants are an adaptation. It doesn't mean you're going to see it somewhere. and Yeah. Animals. If intelligence and language was naturally selected once, surely a Gila monster should be able to stand up, right? and Wait a minute. Has anyone ever actually tried to talk to one of these things?
Speaker: What if they can talk? I will say that there probably is solid evidence that animals are are doing something that's close to religion. like i think that I think Pavlov's dog is is pretty close. like If you can do operant conditioning, if an animal can believe there's food when there's no food because of a bell, I mean, think about a church bell.
Speaker: um Makes you salivate. Yeah, you want those crackers. So if an animal's doing something with kind of deliberation, structure, consistency, but sort of weird, they probably have religion. Animals are silly, yeah. They're inherently silly. I just saw something on YouTube where like there's a dog that collects rocks. He collects rocks every day and he he puts them like in ah in a certain spot and then he won't let anyone touch his rocks.
Speaker: I think that, yeah, the word religion is so vague. Of course there could be a rock collecting religion. And I think there also could be like a flying through the air and killing goats religion. Like I think eagles are religious in that way. I think howling howling with your group of buddies as wolves, that's pretty, real it seems useless. If we define religion as a prayer, anything you're doing with your buddies, right that isn't vital to your existence.
Speaker: Yeah. It's religion. Yeah. What do you, what do you call a group of white guys or religion? Yeah, that's right. And then octopi and cuttlefish are always changing colors and using jet jets of ink for God knows what reason. I guess anything an animal does that is mysterious is, is they're probably, they're probably doing a religion that I, I don't understand that much whales jumping out of the humpbacks, jumping out of the water for no reason yeah for all because they believe in God.
Speaker: Is that really a recent theory that religion is an adaptation of mankind that allows people to live in societies? that yes That's the belief here. but like yeah dance Ants, if they didn't have like an active belief in God, they they wouldn't be able to handle each other.
Speaker: too much Ants believe in hierarchy, though, right? I mean, they're all kind of surrendering to the idea that the queen is queen is the utmost. She's like a god on earth. She's like a god queen. And then the inverse is that atheism is a recent adaptation, so you don't have to live in society. Yeah. The only way you can stand to spend hours alone each day kind of being an introvert is by being a militant atheist.
Speaker: right well none of this matters according to well there's no no one is mad at me for being a loser that's the atheism right there's no There's no judgment for how I waste my time. where god God wants you to be next to someone at the very least. Social. It literally just puts too much on God's plate when people are staying inside and not chatting. Because then he has to like keep an eye on that one person. He just wants them to all be in the same room so that he can keep an eye on. He wants people to like use the carpool lane. Definitely. I've been doing atheist shit in my apartment for weeks.
Speaker: Really? Hold up in here. Not really showering or seeing people. Big time atheist. Atheist shit. Yeah. He's doing some atheist shit. I wonder what the most atheistic animal is. is Probably um only like so sodomizing animal. Like a lot of animals come commit sodomy, right? Yeah. Whichever one does the most. It's only sodomy if you believe in God. That's true. That's what makes it so excellent. You know what you're doing.
Speaker: isn't a front to God, and that's that's what makes it erotic. I would say that like a snake or a centipede is pretty bad, pretty evil, probably not that religious. I feel like snakes are only thinking about themselves and their next meals and so on. You've never seen snakes be really social? No. I guess a snake charmer is selling you on the idea that they're that they like to play, but it's just a ruse. It's not a social, if the only way you can interact with someone is by enchanting them.
Speaker: Putting them in a trance. That's not true. Oh, you like to be hypnotized you or you can be hypnotized. You get your chill. yeah i would not want to be a snake charmer because that's just not how i like interacting with my interlockcutors you like joking and like sharing shit like it's so one-sided If I had to be the snake in that situation or the charmer or both days, I think I'm fucked. i just There's nothing about that that speaks to my social strength. Charmer's horrible. Yeah. that How you interact with Esli. That's nice. Pierce is awesome. He will, he will, he will entrance us for sure.
Speaker: he will give us more i mean All he would have to do is like move his head back and forth as a charmed, as a snake, as a charmed being. I think, Derek, to your point, they're basically doing the same thing. They're both just kind of staring at each other and moving from side to side. Yeah, yeah. The snake's just doing active listening. I've heard that's true of hypno hypnosis in general, the way they hypnotize people, that it's not that it's not real.
Speaker: It's not real, but that if if you can convince someone that hypnosis is real, they're effectively... If you convince someone they're being hypnotized, essentially, which is not real, then they are hypnotized. It's not and so different from improv and going like, okay, in a second you're going to pretend to be hypnotized and I'm going to pretend to be hypnotizing you.
Speaker: It's definitely the hardest part of your time. And you have to say yes to everything. I'm going to make i'm goingnna ask you to make up that your parents were going to say tannic cold. And you have to just just roll with it.
Speaker: Yeah, I think that's probably the hardest part. I mean, the easiest part of hypnosis is asking someone to do something silly. The hardest part is convincing them that that is something that they gotta do. The reason for why you should act like a monkey is because you are going to. You're you're actually profoundly hypnotized right now. Believe me, you're gonna do it.
Speaker: but Have either of you been hypnotized? I don't think so. I tried to do self -hypnosis once. What, like on YouTube? No, I read a book by a hypnotist and he was like, you can hypnotize yourself. Just picture that you're walking downstairs. Like for a while. For a really long time. How long? or had you Hypnotize yourself to do what? ah to figure out To figure out what to do next. To get help. To get help quick.
Speaker: to quickly talk to a ah therapist who doesn't exist. what What would happen? How would you know if you're hypnotized? Would you black out? Well, that was another part of it is like you're walking down the stairs and it's getting really dark. It's so dark that you can't see anything. And then what's going to, what's going to happen after you fall asleep or whatever? Uh, well then that's when the hip, that's when it starts. That's when the thing that, that's when the thing that was supposed to happen begins happening. That's when the hypnotists arrive.
Speaker: It's like firing a flare into the sky. You've run the dirty work, you've hypnotized yourself, you've done it all for them, and now they're just kind of like vultures circling around waiting for their prize. Whichever hypnotist gets to you first can give the orders. Yeah. I want hypnotism to be as popular as astrology. I want it to be something that like most people you run into like know like a little about or like are hypnotizing. Right. And have like hypnosis parties and stuff like that. yeah Yeah. I'm not that suggestible, but I'm working on making my mind more pliable. there are like Aren't there movies where like women hypnotize each other and make each other do stuff? Often there are movies like that.
Speaker: Yeah, that is just some fantasy. okay No, I think there are movies about that. It's just a male fantasy though. Most movies are. Movies are just a big male fantasy and it just goes to show that they just want to see women women having to do stuff. Yeah, women acting. Men are using movies to get women to act.
Speaker: What are you thinking of something specific Derek or like, or a general idea? No, I'm not thinking it's, isn't that a genre of movie? The women hypnotize each other and, uh, yeah, it's a genre. It's like sci -fi. I guess. I don't know. I'm just imagining it. It's funny too. It's funny to imagine something that wonderful. Don't they make this and it's, so it's a bit specific. I mean, I feel like Hypno chicks is just ah a genre of film. I don't know. Can you name a single time that it's happened? I've never looked for it, but I guess I've always felt like if i if I looked for it, it would be there. Yeah, I just don't know if those are the kinds of movies that are hitting movie theaters, per se. Well, no, not movie theaters, but like maybe like, you know, content hubs or whatever. I feel like creators would be interested. I think DeviantArt is really interested in... in
Speaker: People who look hypnotized, which that's another fantasy is that you can spot, spot suggestible people who are mid hypnosis just by looking. The spirals, right? spiral Spiralized. Which hurt by the way. Yeah, it's not. It hurts to have. It doesn't feel good. When they spiral, it's agony. Your pupils aren't supposed to do that. No.
Speaker: I had a friend who was telling me about ah an erotic story that he read that is about hypnosis or hypnosis fetish. And the story starts off with a paragraph description of just the fact that this guy is hypnotizing this girl.
Speaker: And then the rest of the story has no mention of hypnosis or anything. And it's just from her perspective, just having very willing, pleasurable intercourse. Nice. I'm really attracted to this man.
Speaker: And it's nice and it's just normal. Just normal. But she's hypnotized. She is hypnotized. That's why she's having a nice time, I guess. It's not really normal. It's actually not normal. It's sinister actually. You could make like a really, really nice feature length hardcore porno if in the first 10 minutes there's an evil wizard. Yep. You just need that.
Speaker: or a good wizard. It doesn't even matter how what what the ethical boundaries of the wizard's ah behavior, you know he just has to he just has to be able to hypnotize someone into having a lot of sex. and They have to have gone to the wizard in the first place and say, I want to have more enjoyable sex with a ton of people. Can you establish this for me? Yeah, they go to a fantasy realm and the wizard is there. It's sort of hard to get off ah with a pornographic video that doesn't sort of preface it with a sort of wizard. people hypnotized yeah it's It's hard to watch porn if you don't have something in the beginning that indicates that like evil exists. yes yeah Yeah, I think like that's the sort of a
Speaker: That's the the the dark truth of pornography is not that there's like evil magic happening. It's just simple trickery. It's simple trickery and it happens with a world of good in the background. A world of good. A world of good.
Speaker: That's another thing that that ah these these movies need. is like um There needs to be a lot of ah ambiance and big open windows with ah people having like splendid picnics outside and things like that. like you know we're We're in here enjoying each other, but outside is also good.
Speaker: yeah And we're gonna return to our our social lives as soon as we come. Yeah, there should be way more background characters and in porn, especially when it's not like an orgy or a public thing, just through the windows. And there should be more ah visits to the doctor. Right, instead of ah the off -cam ones. Yeah, and instead of the off -cams.
Speaker: It would be horrible to watch pornography knowing that one or more of the actors like has um like high blood pressure. Well, I was thinking it would be kind of horrible to see a porn where you know that someone was conceived during it. It would be horrible to see that. It would be it would be different. right It would be yeah would be, yeah. It would be really bad if it was kept secret. But obviously in the first 10 minutes if they said, let's have a child, nothing wrong with that. That's fine. No, that would be erotic.
Speaker: Here's the question, guys. Derek, would you like to read this? Pierce is doing such a good job. It's crazy. Does BDSM exist in hunter gatherer tribes? Do hunter gatherers enjoy being sexually dominant or submissive? Or is that a post agricultural revolution thing?
Speaker: Do you need to have a Like, do you need to have agriculture in order to enjoy being dominant? I think the development of agriculture ruined ballgags. You don't think it created them? No, it ruined them. They're worse now. They're boring.
Speaker: Well, now they're just for sex. Right. Yeah, before 100 Gathers got a lot out of ah taking a ball gag, which was designed to, I guess, gag a hostage from a... A cheetah. Yeah, the cheetah that's harassing your tribe.
Speaker: they somehow shut up They somehow catch the cheetah, the fastest land mammal, and they hold it down and put a gag in its mouth because the cheetah is biting them. Cheetah is biting the tribe. Yeah, when we went from gagging and hog tying ah cheetahs to gagging and hog tying each other. That was hot. ye That was hot, but then agriculture. Then agriculture got kind of popular.
Speaker: yeah Not to be Jordan Peterson or anything, but isn't it kind of intuitive that the hunters would be dominant and the gatherers would be sort of a little bit more submissive? Yeah, I just feel like once agriculture happened, then they were they were able to kind of look back and just go, huh, I guess the we were kind of performing that, weren't we? I was always just kind of like pretending to be a hunter. Right. no like i was Then agriculture happened and they could just move into the bedroom, like, you'll hunt me, I'll gather. Uh -huh. Yeah, you hunt me, I gather you.
Speaker: Yeah. But in the meantime, we're both just working at the farm. Right. We're just both toiling. And so now this whole so this whole me hunting you thing doesn't really make any sense. So I guess you could be Hunter for now and fuck me.
Speaker: You could fuck me. now that Now that we have crops, I can imagine being fucked. i can i can I can imagine that I'm the cheetah and that you're the rabbit or whatever. I guess in this situation, a cheetah is not... No, we don't hunt cheetahs. It's not worth it. Well, rabbits don't fuck cheetahs, but not much. a cheetah A cheetah eats a rabbit and salivates when it sees a rabbit and gets probably like ah the cheetah equivalent of a hard -on. Yeah, it's vore.
Speaker: Once the cheetah and the rabbit are both working at the same office together, the rabbit is able to say like, hey, now that we're both like fed, I guess I guess i can salivate looking at you. Now all my salivation is now superfluous. That makes sense. Once the cheetah has food or grain, then they give you friends with the rabbit.
Speaker: um i guess i'm i i think that it's interesting to imagine bondage more so than or like ah no Like a hunter -gatherer. More anything to imagine bondage than too much anything.
Speaker: And then latex. I really like the idea of a hunter -gatherer wearing a latex nurse outfit. Do you think that would ever happen before agriculture, before rice? But bondage probably did not exist until agriculture, because why would you put someone into bondage? I think that it's interesting to imagine bondage more so than... You would never have a rope. Yeah, it's going to make them worse at gathering and worse at their email jobs. It doesn't make much of a difference. No. Or sedentary society. I do think it's a, it's, it's, I like the question. Cause yeah, was, was sex weird? Is that a new thing? The question is, did they enjoy it? Did they enjoy being sexual? Did they enjoy it? The answer to that is no, they didn't, they didn't even know. They didn't even know that there was. What would happen is they would just have elaborate fantasies about latex and stuff. They weren't able to actualize any of them because, well, we're in the past. We live in the past. I can't wait until we can manufacture this. Yeah. Latex is going to turn me on. It would be so hot if this material. But it's going to be a long process. First, we have to figure out how plants grow. Right. Well, that's, I think, what a cave drawing is, is them trying to give you the blue plate. Let's figure out how plants grow. Figure out the movement of the stars or whatever it is. Let's understand. know the whole technology tree, like we investigate this and then we discover that. But they're writing down the blue, they're like, we're not going to last to see the latex, but we're just drawing this here for the future people. This is what we want. You guys can use - Which of our sciences will lead to latex? It could be any of them. Yeah, and will we invent lube first? Right. Or later. And I literally know which was invented first. I guess lube. Yeah, lube can be found. Lube is just lotion. Yeah.
Speaker: Spit. Anytime I swallow spit, I think to myself, there goes another, there's more lube. Yeah. Mouth full of lube. I was getting rid of it. Did you ever have like, um, I don't know why I said, did you ever have, but I feel like it maybe it's a universal experience of like, I remember being a kid and one time I said I was thirsty and then some older like bully kid was like, just swallow your spit. Did did we ever have that? I said it.
Speaker: just I remember saying it to kids that that was a technique. Yeah. Cause you'd look down on thirst. No, I was kind. Or did you think that it worked? I thought it worked and I thought it was a good way of getting through a period when you don't have water. Surviving. It's a good method of surviving. I don't know if it actually... I don't think it creates water under the illusion that you could walk through the desert just drinking spit. And honestly, you're going to be swallowing anyway, whether you're trying to survive or not.
Speaker: Yeah. It's like advising someone to blink if they're lost in the desert. Like, keep blinking. Make sure. Don't let those eyes dry out. Keep your ass off. Trust me. You got nothing to lose. We do this. You want to hang with me and my pals? You're going to want to blink. Blink, blink, blink. Keep blinking. Yeah. I mean, I like the idea of latex cavemen. Now that I'm thinking about it, I think it would be smart.
Speaker: If I was a caveman and I found a latex bodysuit, I'm pretty sure that if I would not put it on, I would give it to my crush and say, you put this on. you try intuitively Intuitively. You wouldn't use it for hunting. You would know that it's sex. This is not a hunter's tour. It doesn't help. I guess it wouldn't help at all.
Speaker: A latex bodysuit would not help. Not if it's tight. No, not if it's tight. If it's tight enough, hurting an antelope becomes immeasurably easier. It's totally different from like another, like another modern invention is like the, um, the hoodie. You know, if you found a hoodie, you'd probably just put that on and be cozy. You would not even a cave band could figure that shit out, you know, maybe put your phone in the pocket or whatever.
Speaker: I would still give it to my crush once or twice, maybe. yeah your I mean, obviously, yeah your crush is going to wear your hoodie. If you have a crush on someone, you should you have to have them wear your hoodie for one hour. Hoodies are so important with courting. It's considered romantic, yeah. A hoodie so shockingly would not exist without the latex bodysuit, I don't think, because um it's it's like a hoodie is like, well, what if we could take this this idea of a sexy ah sexy piece of clothing and allow it to become a transactable, fungible thing that is shared. You can't do transactions with latex. No, you don't want to wear your girlfriend's nurse outfit. Again, it's like the distinction between sexy and cozy. And again, I feel like we're back at like Matrix. Matrix trinity and yeah, real life trinity. And she does wear a latex. Yeah, she does kind of do the latex thing, the leather. She doesn't wear a... She doesn't wear a hoodie. I think she might wear a hoodie once or twice in the new world. In the real world, she wears a hoodie and she just wants to cuddle up and like watch a laptop with Neo. She does want to watch the laptop. She wants to watch YouTube shorts with Neo. She wants to watch fail comps. Neo wants to watch YouTube poop, but Trent wasn't like them. They're too random. He tried to get her into that. Yeah. Did Neo try? Did Neo try to convince her that YouTube boobs are funny? He doesn't have that much power in the real world. Only in the matrix can he use his powers together. In the matrix he can hypnotize people, right? Yeah. That is so interesting is that Neo is so powerful that he could hypnotize Trinity, but he doesn't even have to. She just loves him. She consents to just being hypnotized. She was already interested in Neo before she met him. Right. She always wanted to meet him. He came during a dream. Is that something? I think the Oracle told her about him.
Speaker: Oracle told, the Oracle told Trinity that she was going to fall in love with Nia, the one. And she did. She did that. All right. So that actually proves that Oracle's have something to say. my I wanted to ask you guys what you think would happen if a cave man found a bucket hat. Probably use it as a bucket. Yeah. He would probably like shit in it. He wouldn't put it on his head. Way more useful to have it as a bucket. You don't think they would use it on the head? I don't think it would occur to it. I think hats are something that they probably didn't think of right away.
Speaker: Well, they're all nude, right? For a while. Well, that's why I mean, I think you get like shirts and stuff before you get the hat. Yeah, I would not put on a hat if I was if I was like concerned with them the weather. I would just think like but this hat won't do anything to to stop the wolves. No, it'll just get chewed up. We'll just get ruined. Leave it at home. This hat will just be dirty on my head. I might as well just have it be dirty on the floor, on the ground.
Speaker: what's good what's Everything in my life that I own is just becomes dirty. So why would I add another possession to my my inventory? Pierce, you should read this one. You haven't read it. Don't read this. This question is, smoking cigar after oral sex?
Speaker: So this is a weird question, but the wife and I have had an active, have an active of sex life and we get a little creative every now and then. Sometimes after a round of oral sex that airs on the rougher slash enthusiastic side, her throat can sometimes get a little sore. I know it's never a good idea to smoke cigars for health reasons, but is it explicitly a bad idea for us to both have a cigar when her throat is a little sore? Not because of sickness, well, the physical malady kind, I guess. From our sexual encounter?
Speaker: um this person think that cigars are like a painkiller or no i think they're saying they're no they just want to smoke a cigar oh but they're worried that they they've talked to Like the throat wounds, the wounds in there will fill with too much smoke. seen yeah They've literally fucked their wife's throat to shreds and now are worried about carcinogens. Easily, easily slipping in. Our smoke worsen ravaged throats.
Speaker: the tissue the sort of soft tissue in there? it doesnt Well, I think they're just bragging. If they really wanted to know, they would have posted this on the medical subreddit and they posted this on the cigars subreddit. so Yeah, how can I tell a community of mostly men that my wife deep throats me? Well, I guess I should go to our cigars and brag. I have a cigar question.
Speaker: I've been having a cigar problem with my wife the last few months.
Speaker: Sometimes our oral sex airs on the rougher, or maybe you can call it the enthusiastic side. I don't know about you, fellas, but they all seem to be like fucking friendless losers who indulge in this anachronistic hobby. Meanwhile, I get my, I get throated.
Speaker: You guys want to see what I spent a hundred dollars on? It's a pipe. Real pipe. Why is it a hundred dollars? It's the only place you can get a pipe in New York is at a very expensive tobacconist. Are you going to be smoking that? I did smoke this. I smoked tobacco out of this. Wow. How was that? That's fine. How soon have you done it after or before intercourse? If that's not too personal a question.
Speaker: I think every time I've smoked this, it's been within, ah or what's the opposite of within? it's it's i have I've only used this if I've gone without sex for four days.
Speaker: Don't take this the wrong way, but did you get it for a bit? Yes. Okay, I was right. I also do like nicotine and I also have been trying to quit cigarettes, so I thought maybe this would help. Why would it not why would it help? Isn't it more pure? No, it's just like a continuous embarrassing activity and it would probably lead to less smoking if I had to. But I've i've still been buying cigarettes, so it hasn't worked. Yeah, you're not going to carry that around with you. Oh, I see you you're curling your mustache too. Curling my mustache.
Speaker: This really helps. I'm a hipster. I'm trying this out. What do you guys think? It's funny. I like it. You seem like someone who would like music. I do like you. What's interesting is um guys who smoke cigars and pipes and all that, they typically don't like oral sex. It's just not one of their interests. You asked the guy at the place you bought your pipe.
Speaker: Yeah, I said, is this good for a guy who loves to eat pussy? He said, I've never asked that before. yeah never It's never come up. That's not an important question. Can I ask, did you did you like research the right one to get, or did you just kind of walk in and ask for suggestions, like a recommendation? I walked in, I said, what's the cheapest pipe you've got? And he said, it's $100. Yeah. That was $100.
Speaker: It's my cheap, the cheapest pipe. Wow. Is it made of real wood? Is that why it's expensive? Yeah, it's olive, olive wood. Really? Yeah. That's really good for you. It's really nice. Yeah. It's medicinal. They don't have any of their like $3 on ah Alibaba made of plastic or whatever. I guess they probably do.
Speaker: Guess I should have gone online. I just wanted to walk into it. Well, I also wanted to buy pipe tobacco. I don't think you can order that online. Oh, what's that like? It's like in a pouch or something. It's in a bag. It's loose. It's like beef jerky. Must smell nice. Smells nice. Do you guys like that I'm talking about this? It's interesting, right? You guys don't know a pipe smoker. I've known pipe smokers. It smells quite good. I think it's the best secondhand smoke.
Speaker: It's got to be the best. it's not It doesn't feel as nice as having a cigarette though. Are there merits to tobacco? There's merits to nicotine. You you have a thing about nicotine being like the best nootropic or something? No. not Well, that's an it's a yeah it helps you think kind of if you're addicted to it. Nicotine is so awesome. I've just heard that people who consume massive quantities of nicotine have lower rates of ah like Alzheimer's.
Speaker: Like is that true smokers, like compared to people similar ages. That does not line up with my grandma. Not too sharp. Or maybe she would have had even worse Alzheimer's if she didn't smoke. No, I think about it. Yeah. You should be thanking your lucky stars. that I would need to have like a control grandma that didn't smoke to actually know.
Speaker: I hate when grandmas smoke. It's so sad. It's just not cool when they do it. My grandma smoked so much. When I was a kid, I'd go over to her house and it was like her walls were like crying brown fluid because the tar would just collect on the walls. Yeah, that's so sad and annoying. Such like visual living proof of a lack of oral sex in her life. Smoking, smoking a lot, huh?
Speaker: You're smoking. Not getting lucky. Must not be. Must not be getting head or giving. Yeah. When the when the walls are brown, that's usually due to heavy amounts of smoke. That's really heavy. That's heavy. And then when the walls are like glistening, ah that's usually just a sign that a lot of oral sex has taken place. um just You got to look out for the color and for the like viscosity of the sparkling fluid on the wall. I will say something interesting about my grandma, which is um related to this. She burnt down two houses, smoking in bed. Jesus Christ. From smoking in bed, like dropping the cigarette? Yeah. Oh my God. And survived both times. So I don't know. I don't really know how that looked. Yeah. That means that she dropped it in bed and then ran away. I know. that's probably It's probably best if fire starts in your bed. I mean, it's not good to be that close to that sort of thing normally, but
Speaker: It might wake you up so fast that you get out of there and you don't die of smoke inhalation. Yeah, the best place for a fire to start is around you and just immediately circling you. The worst place, the most dangerous place for a fire is the other side of the world. direction read steadily and without your knowledge like ah You just strike at any time and you'll never know.
Speaker: That's a very good point, Matthew. And I think that we should not end with the, or I guess we have to end with a rhetorical question, right guys? Oh, do you have one? Nope. um But, uh, yeah, good rhetorical.
Speaker: Oh yeah, that's a good idea, Matthew. Look at you, Matthew, googling good rhetorical questions. Is that supposed to be a joke? Great. These are not that good rhetorical questions. It's like a comeback. Yeah, I got to know the first part of that, or what it's responding to, I think. Yeah, have you guys heard No Soap Radio? Mm -mm. I heard about that.
Speaker: I guess that's like an old meme. Yeah, no sob radios. It's not very funny. Oldest meme. No, it's it doesn't make me laugh, but I love saying it to people. OK, I actually have one because I was ah one time I was trying to like come up with questions for this podcast, not from like Reddit, but like my own questions. But I don't know if this is a good question. The question is, would you rather accidentally run over a dog or a cat?
Speaker: But I know, Pierce, you said you don't like would you rathers. um Well, I don't like would you rathers that have a bunch of rules. This one's easy. Well, I can alter the question for Pierce. Why is it better to run over a dog than a cat?
Speaker: I guess I would rather kill a cat because cats cats wander and if you clean up the cat, and you bury it quickly or just hide it somewhere. I feel like the family will just think, oh, my cat ran away. Who cares? But running over a dog, you just know that like the odds of a child being attached to that dog are just so much higher. And people love their dogs in a way that I don't think they love their cats. People tend to love dogs more.
Speaker: Yeah, because cats can just leave. They just can be abandoned. But I think there's also a higher chance that the dog could be like a bad guy or a villain who maybe has bitten a child. Whereas with a cat, it's low, low stakes.
Speaker: I think the cat is also more likely to ruin the car because the cat's going to be smaller. like a dog but do They have more sharp hearts. Yeah. A dog, you hit it and it'll just like you'll bounce off and bounce off, but a cat could get stuck in the wheels. and and if we've ever like po you Pop. Yeah. That's a good point. yeah the cat could like if you If you run into a cat, it's like there's like this dust cloud that forms with like stars and fists kind of shooting out of it. Right. But a dog simply perishes. Way cleaner. Also, I feel like cats are don't cling to life as hard. I feel like a dog, you might hit the dog, and the dog will like be a whimpering. and But I think if you hit a cat, it might just be like, that's it for me. I'm only a cat. Goodbye.
Speaker: Right. Run under the house. Yeah. Run under the house and die with dignity. Dogs just clutching to life, dying so hard, like an octogenarian with Alzheimer's, still confused about why this happened, begging you to give it some clarity or some comfort, whereas a cat will simply move on to the next life. Yeah. Yeah. The sort of histrionics of suffering or worst of the dog. Yeah, just like the whole song and dance of coming to terms with the with agony and death and all that. I just would rather not be a part of that. I don't want to see that crap. The cat gets it. The cat knows. The cat is an atheist, essentially. It's true. And they have tact. they're not doing They're not whimpering or moaning or doing dying words. Who does dying words when they die? Are you guys going to do that? Are you guys going to whisper dying words? I'm probably just going to go on my phone. That used to be a whole job that someone would have to kind of wait next to a dying guy for them to say something profound. Yeah, transcribing. Yeah, they'd have to ask them a lot of questions like we're doing right now to try to get them to say something profound. It'd be annoying though if you like, you said something that was really good and then you kind of like, didn't die. And you'd just kind of be like, I can't talk for the, I don't know when I'm going to die. Weeks might go by and you're just like, I don't even want to ask to go to the bathroom. Yeah, you don't want those to be your dying words.
Speaker: I guess that wasn't a rhetorical question. I guess we answered it. That's fine. All right. Let's, uh, let's call it. That's it. Goodbye. Bye bye.
