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#81 - Aisling Lannon: Finding balance and self-acceptance on your fitness journey
970 Plays9 months ago
In today’s episode, I chat with Aisling Lannon, an online fitness coach from Roscommon, Ireland.
Aisling shares her inspiring journey from accountancy to fitness coaching, highlighting her personal weight loss story and the habits-based approach she uses with her clients.
We chat about so much including dieting and gaining phases, the importance of maintenance, the challenges of prepping for a fitness photoshoot, the difficulties of reversing after a photoshoot, and the value of self-acceptance and holistic health.
We also discuss how to balance personal goals with maintaining a healthy lifestyle.
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with friends who might benefit. For more health tips and updates, follow me on Instagram and TikTok @katehamiltonhealth.
Music by LiQWYD Free download: hypeddit.com/link/xxtopb [http://hypeddit.com/link/xxtopb] Promoted by FreeMusicPromo [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCbycji-eySnM3WD8mbxPUSQ] / @freemusicpromo1
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Transcript
Introduction to Podcast and Guest
00:00:08
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of the Kate Hamilton health podcast. So today's episode, I chat with Ashling Lannon. So Ashling is an online coach from Ross Common in Ireland. And she specializes in helping women achieve their
Career Change and Personal Fitness Journey
00:00:25
Speaker
fitness goals. We have the most amazing conversation. We chat first of all, a little bit about career change.
00:00:31
Speaker
She worked for, I think eight years, she said, as an accountant before it becoming a coach and following her passion for health and fitness. She talks a lot about her own journey where she lost 15 kilos. And we talk about the approach she takes.
00:00:46
Speaker
with her clients and how the approach she took for her own journey to do it in a habits-based way that you can actually maintain. We talk a little bit about maintenance ah as well and how important the journey is rather than just the destination. We talk about dieting, maintenance, gaining phases,
00:01:07
Speaker
and goals and whether we should always be striving for goals, whether it's necessary to be always, you know, gaining and dieting and gaining and dieting, or whether the approach that we need to take eventually at some stage of our lives it' is really just being happy with where we're at and maintaining. And we talk a lot about how to maintain and how to
Fitness Goals and Habits
00:01:27
Speaker
do it in a healthy way. And then we dive into the topic around her own photo shoot. So Aisling did do a photo shoot journey herself.
00:01:35
Speaker
where she was in prep for 16 weeks to do her own fitness photo shoot. And she talks about the pros, you know, the things she enjoyed about the whole process and how empowering the actual day itself was. And then she talks a little bit about the cons as well and things that she found difficult around.
00:01:52
Speaker
the photo shoot, which wasn't as much really with the dieting side of it and the sacrifices that had to be made, but much more about what happens after the photo shoot and how important it is to reverse diet properly and not to rebound, which is a really fascinating topic as well. So without further ado, here is the episode with Ashling Lannon, and I hope you enjoy it as much as I did and get a really, really well-rounded view on a healthy approach to that.
Background and Transition to Coaching
00:02:24
Speaker
Ashling, welcome to the podcast. Hi Kate, how are you? Thank you for having me on. Thank you so much for coming on. I'm looking forward to having a good chat around lots of different topics. Cause I do think we've, you know, we've a lot of kind of similar mindset when it comes to different topics around health and fitness. But I suppose, look, before we get going, if you want to let everyone know a little bit about who you are, what has brought you to where you are today, and, you know, a little bit about your background, I suppose.
00:02:50
Speaker
Okay, so for anyone that doesn't know me, my name is Ashine and I'm an online coach. I'm the owner of Ashve Coaching. So I've been working as an online coach for the past two and a half years. This may surprise a lot of people that doesn't know me, but I'm actually a chartered accountant and I worked in finance for eight years before I finally bit the bullet and decided to follow my passion. I always knew deep down accountancy wasn't for me.
00:03:13
Speaker
I wasn't meant to work in an office for the rest of my life, now saying that I didn't realize that technically an online coach is probably a glorified desk job as well, but I knew finance wasn't for me. I ended up, even when I finished school, didn't really know what I wanted. I thought I wanted to be a teacher, ended up doing commerce in Galway. When I finished that, I still wanted to do teaching,
00:03:40
Speaker
But whatever way things were at the time in Galway, I couldn't go straight into teaching. and So I did a Masters in Accountancy and then I ended up working as a chartered accountant. But like everyone, I knew it just wasn't for me. I was just like, if I keep doing this for the rest of my life, I'm just going to be unhappy.
Impact of COVID-19 on Career
00:03:58
Speaker
But the thing was, I was always into fitness growing up. So I played soccer, I played GAA, like most Irish girls, I did Irish dancing for a period of time as well. And then once I kind of hit college, I was introduced to the gym and it just, I just was always active and there was always a passion there behind, I suppose, activity. So
00:04:18
Speaker
To kind of summarize how I started my online journey, I have COVID to thank for it. So yes, COVID was a horrific time for most people, but for me, it wasn't all bad. I was actually living it in Sydney at the time when COVID hit. Of course, Sydney was a bit further behind COVID hitting, so we were like, what's the big panic at home? Like what's going on? It's only a little phase, but We did, it eventually did hit Sydney and we decided, right, OK, we're going to move home. And when I got home, I'm actually originally from Raskamen, but I moved to Carolow with my partner. So it was a big change for me, obviously movevan county moving home as well from Australia in the middle of Covid, moving to a new county with no
Starting an Online Coaching Business
00:04:57
Speaker
friends. So it was a big, big change, no social life. and Thankfully, I was very, very lucky that my partner's family, James's family were so welcoming. So I felt very at ease. but
00:05:09
Speaker
I just wanted to do something to have something to focus on and for anyone that has been to Sydney they'll know that the Sydney stone is a real thing so I had gained the Sydney stone and I just wanted to lose that again so I started my own transformation journey while getting a job as an accountant so I was working as an accountant I was working from home so again very little social interaction because of Covid But I wanted something to keep me busy, so I wanted to do a course. Most people would have said, yeah, she'll do an accountancy course. I was like, no, not a hope. So I did my PT course in January 2021 and in October 2021 I handed in my notice as an accountant and I suppose the rest is history. like
00:05:50
Speaker
Looking back it was an incredibly brave move to make but at the time I just wasn't happy and you can prolong these things. Similar to a weight loss journey you can wait and wait and wait for the perfect time but there's never going to be the perfect time and I know most people thought I was absolutely crazy. My poor parents after putting me through college and a master's and everything for years and then she turns around and decides no I'm not doing it anymore.
00:06:13
Speaker
but they were incredibly supportive. James was incredibly supportive and I'm so grateful to say now that I get to do a job I love every single day. I help women lose weight, rebuild their confidence, find their sparkle again and I suppose because I've been through that journey I can really resonate with people as well. No more than yourself Kate, getting to help people from A to B and see them completely transform the life is just an amazing thing to be part of but I suppose what I do also focus on is teaching people how to maintain their progress because that is the part of the journey that a lot of people
Challenges in Fitness Industry
00:06:48
Speaker
neglect. A lot of people neglect. And I suppose, growing up, I always struggled with my weight. I was the bigger friend, let's just say. I wasn't the girl that could borrow the friend's clothes. I just was never 100% confident in myself and
00:07:03
Speaker
Because I did sport probably helped with my diet. It wasn't the best, let's be honest. I know it wasn't, but because I was so active, I kind of maybe carried it a small bit better, but I'm sure similar to yourself, you tried it all. I'd done Slimmin' World, I'd done the 5.2 diet, the Special K diet. I've even ashamed to say that I did detox teas and the waste trainer. I did it all, but it was when I came home from Australia and said, no, enough is enough. Okay, I need to do this properly. I've wasted too much time, too much energy.
00:07:33
Speaker
and I was just sick of going around in circles. I invested in a coach and honestly it was the best thing I ever done because I have dropped 15kg in the last four years. and I suppose it just helped me to help women do the same thing because I've been through that. I know the struggles, I know the ups and downs and I know everything I've done wrong to not let them do it wrong because I didn't have that until I eventually invested in a coach and someone that was educated and look, I tried it myself. I tried it so many times myself but it just didn't work and Because there's so much and misinformation out there from you have to restrict yourself. You have to have really low calories. You have to train seven days a week. You have to be miserable really to lose weight. You don't. And I have done it without all of those things. So now I want to be able to help women do the exact same.
Career Risks and Personal Growth
00:08:22
Speaker
Like, I think it's it's it's so interesting, the the amount of people that I've spoken to, to anyone who's been listening to this podcast, you know, episode after episode, the amount of people that I've been talking to who changed their whole lives over COVID. It's, you know, i and it's funny because I did as well.
00:08:40
Speaker
And I thought I was the only one in the world that was doing this, you know what I mean? It's amazing. And I really do. And, you know, I say this a lot, but it was the, it was the slowdown. It was the stopping where it was like, suddenly we weren't being dragged along by our own lives. It was like, suddenly you had time to be like, right, hold on a second. What's happening here? yeah Like, why am I so unhappy? Or like to, for me, it was like, I didn't even realize I was that unhappy.
00:09:04
Speaker
Yeah. Like I was too busy to realize it. I was like, we what's going on? So I think it's so inspiring to make that move. And you're so right. Like the problem doesn't go in away go away. The longer you leave it, the more difficult it gets to make that move. Like, you know, I spent 15 years as a teacher.
00:09:21
Speaker
Before I moved, now I had kids and stuff as well. So it was kind of, you know, it wasn't a quite as easy to and just be like, you know, and I had my first child when I was 23. So I was a young mother and I was working and it was a really, really great career when I had small kids, like really great because, you know, it was a nice balance. But I just think.
00:09:38
Speaker
doing that and that career move while you steal while you don't have children, while you you know you don't have as much ties is the right thing to do. you know and anyone listening whether you Whether you do have children or ties or not like and if it's something you want to do, definitely just start moving in the right direction because like it doesn't have to be it.
00:09:55
Speaker
quit everything. Like I did it over a phased period of time. Like I, you know, I was, I did my PT course. I was doing bits on the side while I was teaching and I worked really hard from like 2020 up until recently, really and nonstop work to get me to where I am. And suddenly I've just got to this stage where I'm like, ah I can actually breathe now. And I'm like, look back and be like, look at the life I just created for myself.
00:10:19
Speaker
And when I get to do this on a Wednesday morning, you know, it's amazing being able to do that and being able to help women. Like you said, it's amazing. And I think, you know, if you want, if you know what you want, it's worth putting the time in. It doesn't mean throw yourself head first, but just taking one step at a time. 100% agree with you. And I think as well, like you hit the nail on the head there. I had.
00:10:42
Speaker
myself to look after I suppose I was lucky I was in that situation that I just had myself obviously my partner as well like he obviously is important as well but I didn't have kids to be worried about and the thing is you know it does make it harder because the more responsibility you have, you know the more people you have to worry about, the harder it is to make that leap of faith, I suppose. But I just said, look, at the end of the day day, I have a very good career. If it fails, it fails. But the thing is, I'll have bigger regrets in life if I don't try this,
Building a Coaching Business During the Pandemic
00:11:12
Speaker
rather than looking back and be like, why didn't I? And like yourself, Kate, I'm doing a job now I love. I wake up every day, I've been like,
00:11:20
Speaker
Oh my God, how did I do eight years of accountancy? like Now, look, I don't regret it. I absolutely don't regret it. It was part of my life. It was part of my story. But now I'm doing something I love. And if similar to what you just said, there are so many people. I thought I was the only one at the time doing it. I wasn't.
00:11:38
Speaker
but it probably felt scarier for me at the time because I felt like I was the only person doing it. But as you said, so many people did it. And I don't think there's one person that has looked back and be like, why did I change career? And if you do, you can always go back no more than myself. If you decided in the morning, okay, I can't do this anymore.
00:11:57
Speaker
Teaching is still there. You still have that. You have that qualification. you can That's what I love about education. i'm like you know and like I think sometimes I come across a little bit anti-education, which I'm really not. i like I think education is freedom and I think that nobody can take that away from me.
00:12:14
Speaker
my qualification, my my years of experience, anyone listening, whether your background, you know, whether you have an education behind you or not, the life experience that you have behind you, everything that's happened to you or that you have done or you've achieved, you get to take with you on the next step and it's okay to change your mind.
00:12:31
Speaker
And I think that's really important. And that's very true, like you said, for fat loss as well. So if you're like, I need to make lifestyle changes to my health, the problem's not going to go away as you delay it. Now it may not be the right time like you've tried and it hasn't worked because you've got too much on your plate. That's fine.
00:12:47
Speaker
But you get there eventually because you know it's what you're supposed to do. And just like the career, you don't have to jump head first. It's one step at a time. And like, that's exactly what coaches like myself or yourself help with. But what I love what you were saying, all the information online. Yeah.
00:13:02
Speaker
in relation to like, you know, when, when you decided to get a coach because you were like, where do I start? What's healthy? Like, I remember being in that position as well at the start. I don't know in kilos how much I've lost, but I've lost like three and a half stone since my, my small list was born. And that's about five years, in about five years so like five years ago. But I've always, I kind of, I got down, I lost that in four years, I think. And I kept it off and then, you know, did a gain and phase and came down. and that But, you know, always kept it off and maintained it. But,
00:13:30
Speaker
Like I remember when I was starting out and all I really wanted was i to I want to do this a healthy way. What is healthy? And I remember Googling it. I mean, like, what the fuck? Like we've got vegans telling you one thing, we've got carnivores telling you the other, paleo, keto. Like what the fuck am I supposed to be doing? What's healthy?
00:13:47
Speaker
And I think it's the opposite problem to I had to what we would have had growing up, where it was like, we didn't have access to the information. We had to believe whatever the magazines told us, which has led to a lot of what a lot of us 30 plus have issues with now with body image. But it's like the opposite. So now we've got too much information and this is where it's really important to to choose your coach wisely. Talk to someone who you trust that you know has the education behind them.
00:14:13
Speaker
And it's going to lead you in the right direction. interests that hurt like Yeah. And because even with education, there's a lot of crazy doctors out there telling you to do some crazy diets, which we won't go down too much now that him just because someone has a doctor or a PhD beside their name and they're. skewing scientific research to back up their own personal beliefs and nutrition doesn't necessarily make it true. And I find that, that's what I find quite hard about the Stephen Bartlett podcast at the minute. Like
Sustainable Fitness and Healthy Habits
00:14:41
Speaker
I love, I love Stephen Bartlett, but I find he's getting a lot of sensational people on and it's giving out a lot of extreme information. Absolutely. And that's the thing, like there is so much extreme information out there. And like what you said there was like when we were growing up, I'm 33. So again, like when I was growing up, it was literally
00:14:59
Speaker
the skinniest version of you if you didn't have ribs coming out of you and you know you weren't eating just lettuce you weren't moving in the right direction if the scales weren't coming down you weren't achieving your goals and like now yes okay there's a lot of education out there but there's a lot that still is very very hard for people to interpret and the thing is like I went through as I said to you I've gone through the yo-yo dieting, I've done the restricting calories Monday day to Friday, binging at the weekend because that's what I thought you have to do, restrict calories really really low but but all it leads to is binging at the weekend and the thing is
00:15:38
Speaker
It's all so, so hard and I look back now and be like, I thought I knew it all. I thought I knew it all and I knew absolutely nothing. And it was only when I invested in a coach that knew better than me, was more educated than the me, that knew how to do it correctly.
00:15:54
Speaker
that's when I started seeing progress. And the thing is, I had done so many quick fixes. I had done three weeks, lose a load of weight, regain the weight plus more. But I took my time when I came home from Australia, I was like, I am sick of losing weight and then regaining it. And just felt like I was just constantly, constantly dieting.
00:16:13
Speaker
but i was just like right this is the time now now look cover did help i will admit cover did help i had no distractions there was no socializing and look at the beginning of any journey you do have to make some sacrifices like you can't expect to be going out every single weekend having your 10 points against us and your kebab at the end of the night and the breakfast roll the next day and still expect changes. I'll be the first person to say that but there is a sort of balance that you can find but I suppose with my journey it did help when I started off with Covid because I had a goal. I didn't have those distractions but the thing is
00:16:51
Speaker
What was different for me from every other time I had tried was I learned how to feel myself correctly. I learned how to work on habits, which I had never done before. It was literally restrict, restrict, restrict, lose weight as quick as possible. Whereas when I started four years ago on this actual journey, like yourself, that you said, you've lost the weight. I've lost the weight.
00:17:13
Speaker
It has fluctuated a small bit since. But but that's life. That's supposed to happen. you know Life has ups and downs. And this is what I say to my clients all the time. Life has ups and downs. Why do we expect our weight loss to be perfect? The weight loss is going to go up and down with life and that's okay as long as we're aware.
00:17:30
Speaker
Yeah and that's the thing like it has gone up a bit but I know exactly how to do it to bring it down but the thing is the difference with my journey this time around comparing to the years and years in my 20s of trying is that I looked at habits and instead of wanting to be constantly at my destination wanting to be where I wanted to be I actually fell in love with the journey and just wanting to be better every week because the thing is when you get to your destination What do you expect happens then? You still have to work to maintain that progress. And it doesn't feel as good as you think. Like, it's not like you're standing at the top of the mountain. You're like, yes. It's literally like, oh, I feel exactly like me. Yeah. But smaller. And then you're kind of like, am I smaller? Yeah. Could I be smaller? You know, suddenly you're picking apart something else. You're like, OK, I'm smaller, but now I don't like my skin or something. You know what I mean? There's always something. If you don't work in your mindset, there's always something.
Focus on Health Over Aesthetics
00:18:24
Speaker
Always, always something. And I suppose.
00:18:26
Speaker
that brings me into like I done that I dropped the weight so I e like I felt incredible but I felt amazing I you know I got to where I wanted to be but then it was like right what's the next step like you know where do I go from here and I think that you always do not that you always have to have a goal you don't but instead of always looking at aesthetics all the time and want wanting to be a certain shape it's I think I changed my mindset to how I felt it wasn't all about about how I looked it was about how I felt and like I know when I'm feeling shit and I know why I'm feeling shit because I'm not doing the things that make me feel good and I've learned that now but as I said the difference when I actually have done it properly is I've built habits I've looked at sleep which I would have 100% neglected in my 20s I looked at stress management which I didn't even think related to
00:19:19
Speaker
you know fat loss i looked at hydrating myself i looked at you know moving my body more i underestimated how important steps were like i just thought you have to go to the gym whereas now i'm like to my clients just move your body you do not under don't underestimate how important steps are for actually progress and the thing is not everyone has two hours to spend in the gym every day but getting out for fresh air a few times a day, 20 minutes, three or four times a day, not only is it good for you physically but mentally as well. It's about the small changes and trusting the process. At the end of the day the time is going to pass on you guys, make the use of it and if you enjoy the process it just makes it a hell of a lot easier.
00:20:03
Speaker
Yeah, so you so basically what you would recommend people, the the approach that you took for your fat loss and that you would take with your clients would be slight calorie deficit, not. Rather than me a quest telling you to and what so of what what is it that exactly that you would recommend is the best yeah best things to be ticking off, I suppose.
00:20:22
Speaker
So when it comes to my coaching, I really focus on behavior changes. So daily habits, behavior changes, yes, if you're looking to lose weight, you have to be in a calorie deficit, but a slight calorie deficit that you still have that flexibility, but it's learning how to, I suppose,
00:20:40
Speaker
If, say for instance, you know you've gone from sitting at a desk all day moving 2,000 steps a day, trying to increase that rather than drop calories down to like 800 to be in that depth. So it's about learning that it's more than just food. It's about moving your body more. It's about you know getting your fruit and veg in, getting your protein in, prioritizing your sleep, you know looking after yourself. And it's not just all about, for me,
00:21:07
Speaker
When I say my coaching is more than just fat loss, I truly believe it is. It's not just a training and nutrition plan I throw at them. It's to build our confidence. It's to regain that sparkle that they've lost, to feel good in their themselves, feel confident in themselves. Every woman deserves to have that feeling that, you know, they feel good every single day. And yes, it does take a calorie deficit, but you shouldn't be dieting forever. And if you yeah if you commit to it and you do the phase of the dieting, you drop the weight, then you learn how to maintain it. And you shouldn't be feeling like, if you're listening to this and you feel like you've been dieting your whole life,
00:21:46
Speaker
then unfortunately to tell you, you haven't been dieting. And that is the reality of it. I thought I was dieting all those years. I wasn't because I wasn't actually essentially in a calorie deficit, but now I know what dieting is. If you do it properly, you will drop the weight. The quicker you get in and the quicker you commit to it, the quicker you get out and the quicker your calories go up and you have that freedom again.
00:22:09
Speaker
Yeah, and it's not like when you say commit to it, it's not even about it being aggressive. It's like, it's like calorie deficit. So, you know, like, obviously, everyone's different. Like when I started out in a deficit, I was down to 2200 calories, you know, a lot of my clients will usually be somewhere between 1600 and 2000 calories, you know, like, in and around, like, we're talking a decent amount of food, if you're doing it right.
00:22:29
Speaker
And, but this is where the habits come in. You need to be willing to change how you're doing dinners slightly, maybe changing up how you're, eat what you're eating for breakfast and, you know, be willing to try things, figure out what works. It's, it's efficient dieting, isn't it? It's like, wait, I'm committing to this phase. I'm like, I'm, I'm going to do my thing. It's not going to be perfect, but I'm not going to say fuck it. I'll start it again one day. I'm like, if I fuck up, I just get straight back to it.
00:22:54
Speaker
And ah just get, get on with it quicker. But what I think what you said then as well about like to be process focused rather than goal focused, yes, obviously having goals is important, but I think this is a huge toxic trait in the fitness industry. And, you know, and I've like fallen victim to it myself as well. And I know you have two doing, you know, dieting phases, gaining phases.
00:23:17
Speaker
And there's nothing wrong with doing a gaining phase to build, like, you know, building muscle on your body is going to be super healthy, you know, as we're getting older as well. Like, and my whole point to doing a gain phase is I want a bit more muscle so that I can maintain this muscle as I get older. But a lot of people, especially younger girls, spend a lot of time kind of, you know, they'll diet for photo shoots. Then they'll build muscle for six months. Then they'll diet down again for another photo shoot. And then they'll, so basically like gaining phases and dieting phases.
00:23:42
Speaker
is basically glorified yo-yo dieting. They're spending your life up and down, up and down, up and down. And it gets to a point, it's like, no, I know a lot of my clients aren't really interested in that. Like a lot of my clients are like, they just want to lose weight, they want to be healthy, and they want to be happy. And that's a bit where I'm at now. I'm like, you know, my white shorts that I was working towards for my holidays, I'm in them. And someone said to me, oh, God, you're going to need a a smaller pair of shorts for your holiday. And I'm like, no, I'm done. yeah I'm not dieting more. I don't want to be skinnier. yeah I'm happy. being I want to be healthy. We need to look at that. And it's like,
00:24:12
Speaker
When you're dieting, it doesn't have to be misery. And if anything, it shouldn't because you need to make it a lifestyle that you enjoy so that when you get to maintenance, you do get to feel amazing and wake up and be like, I'm healthy. I'm full of energy. What exercise am I doing today? What adventures am I going on? You know? No, I 100% agree with you. I'm like.
00:24:30
Speaker
The thing is, my clients would be very, very similar. My clients, majority of them come to me just to feel good, to lose weight, but to feel good, feel good in their clothes, not dread every morning and getting up and be like, oh my God, what's going to fit me today? Not feel like they have to say no to social events because nothing fits them or they don't feel good. Being afraid to jump in photos with their kids or with friends. Like, nobody deserves to feel like that. And like, I've never had a client that has done a photo shoot. I have done one myself, but I haven't. Now look,
00:24:59
Speaker
I have never had a client that has done a photoshoot, but I've done one myself. I have walked the walk, okay? Would I do one again? Maybe. I'll never rule it out.
Social Media and Body Image
00:25:09
Speaker
Would I recommend it? Yes, but there's pros and cons, and as long as you're aware of the pros and cons of it, go for it by all means. But... I do agree with you with the kind of dieting, bulking, dieting, bulking. I'll be totally honest, I have never 100% committed to a bulking face. I haven't. I have built muscle by being at maintenance. I've even, when I did my photo shoot, like I obviously had muscle underneath, but like I had muscle that I never knew I had. Now my body fat was incredibly low, so obviously you could see it at that time. But
00:25:42
Speaker
I'm very similar to you at the moment. I just want to be healthy. I want to be able to live life. Like, I'm getting older. I don't want to have regrets as I go older being like, oh, why didn't I say yes to this? I'm not going to look back in 20 years time and be like, I'm so glad I died to during that period and didn't say yes to that event. Like, I want to look back and be like,
00:26:01
Speaker
I'm able to live my life. Now, look, it's hard, it's hard. Being in this industry, I'm sure you'll agree with me. There's a lot of pressure to, I suppose, well, I don't know if you feel like it, but I feel like it to look a certain way. Regardless of what weight I am, my coaching is going to be no different. I'm the same coach, whether I'm 10Ks heavier or 10K lighter, but I do feel like there's some form. Maybe it's myself getting caught up in the comparison trap and imposter syndrome and being like, oh, my God,
00:26:29
Speaker
but I do feel like there's a lot to blame from social media for I suppose comparison but also looking a certain way. I do truly believe that if there was no social media people wouldn't be as fixated on their physique. And I heard something the other day, which is completely unrelated to to fitness, but it was like, if there was no social media, how many people would we see swimming? And it kind of made me... It was Tony McLeavie who was talking about bodybuilding and he was saying that if there was no social media, if no one was going to see your body,
00:27:04
Speaker
would you really live a bodybuilder lifestyle? Would you really restrict like that? Would you really, you know, and it's like, no, because it's fucking miserable life to live training and eating to look a certain way. I think what you're saying there about like, you know, coaches and social media, and it's very obvious as well. Like when you look on social media and there's a lot of online coaches and it, you know, the pressure is high. Whereas I'm like, i I'm fighting against this. I'm like, I don't care. I'm.
00:27:28
Speaker
promoting health, I'm promoting happiness and I'm like, I don't care. I will look the way that I think it is appropriate for me to look that's healthy and I won't fall into that trap. But also I think, why do we want to conform and look and look like everyone else? It's it going to be interesting in the coming years how that goes. And it's not just for online coaches, it's for everyone. You know, that even anyone who's working towards fitness goals, I think it's really important to know that your goals are are your goals. It's so funny like I was going on a holiday there in June and I got so caught up on how I looked because I was going holidays with friends and like you know I did my photoshoot, I was in incredible shape, I was super lean and I've gained weight since then which is normal because I was never going to be able to maintain that but I was so caught up and worried about what other people would think, oh my god she's let herself go.
00:28:17
Speaker
No, I am finally at a stage now where I'm enjoying life. I can go for a meal with James if he says, come on, we're going for a day and night. If the girls want to go out for drinks, I can do that. I don't feel like I have to say no to things to maintain my shape.
00:28:31
Speaker
Like you said, I just want to be healthy now. Yes, I want to feel good in my body. I want to look good in my clothes. I want to be able to wear the clothes I want. But I've gone past the stage in my life where I need to fit into a certain size jeans. I'm going to get the jeans to fit my body rather than make my body fit into a size jeans. And that's what I want to teach women as well. You do not have to be a certain size to feel good in yourself. You just have to have clothes that make you feel good. And like, it has took me years and years and years to get to that. But I have gone from nearly being a size 14 to being at my smallest, like a size 6 was nearly too big on me when I did my photoshoot. So I've been at both ends of the scales. Was I happy being a size 6?
00:29:18
Speaker
No. Was I happy being a size 14? No. Somewhere in between is where I'm happy. And that's what I'm going to promote. And it's different for everyone. Size looks different on everyone. But for me, I know that.
00:29:33
Speaker
at the moment I have a good balance with food. I can enjoy myself, I train hard, I feel good and it's my
Health, Well-being, and Self-Acceptance
00:29:41
Speaker
overall health. I'm looking at the longer picture, I'm not looking at now, I'm looking at what my body will be able to do for me and when I'm 70 and I'm able to still be independent and do the shop and do that sort of thing and hopefully not i end up in a nursing home because I'm strong enough that I'm able to look after myself but that's what I'm looking at now, the overall health.
00:30:02
Speaker
rather than yeah it is health and and feeling good and like you know everyone is different heights different you know like frames just because someone listening who's like a size 14 and you know you're like you know you're heaviest you're at a size 14 nobody knows what height you are what you look like in person you know and the size 14 on me doesn't sit well like ah you know whereas a size 14 that's the one who's taller and you know is percent or it go is going to be a perfectly healthy size which is exactly what you've been saying and And I think the most important thing is yet, like that, you know, your health markers are good, that your energy levels, and when it comes down to it, what the people that I talk to before they sign up for coaching, you know, when I'm on calls with people, it's, you know, really low energy, feeling so shit about themselves, like nearly feeling like they have to have a nap after work. They're so tired and their energy is low. The food that they're eating is, you know, just to try and get them through the day. And there's absolutely.
00:30:57
Speaker
and ah No shame in this. This is what's happening to us from this kind of stressful lifestyle that we lead, this busy lifestyle that we lead. It's so easy to suddenly wake up one day, you're busy with your full-time job, your kids, your everything. And you're like, what the fuck? I forgot to look after myself. And why do I feel so shit? And that's, and it happens to so many of us. We burn ourselves out. That's it. And then, but then it's like, then What do we do? how what what's the gu What is the ultimate goal? And you see, but this is where we get caught up like, and we get caught up and we're comparing and we then we want more and we want more and we want more. Our goal is to be healthy and our goal is to be happy and our goal is to have energy and confidence. yeah
00:31:35
Speaker
so Continuing to lose weight for the rest of your life is not going to do that. like you Like you said, you're not supposed to be on a diet for the rest of your life. You do it and then we maintain. Will we talk a little bit about maintenance? Yes. I think maintenance is a very much an underrated phase. Very much an underrated phase. People, I feel like obviously at maintenance, you're not seeing the scales move. You're not seeing clothes getting smaller or getting bigger. You're just maintaining. So it can be hard. It can be a mental challenge.
00:32:05
Speaker
to be at maintenance and I truly, truly believe it can be a mental challenge but you have so much more freedom. You have more energy, you can train harder, you just have more flexibility to do things as well. You're still getting your good quality food in, you're still, you know, enjoying life but you're maintaining that progress that you have gotten.
00:32:27
Speaker
by working hard to get to where you are now. And the thing is, it shouldn't be constantly like lose weight or diet dieting to bulk, dieting to bulk. You should be able to enjoy that time of maintenance as well. And I do think it is a very, very, very underrated phase that, yeah, as I said, you don't have progress markers to be constantly comparing against each week, but how you feel.
00:32:54
Speaker
is the progress marker you should be comparing against. Because obviously when you're in a deficit, you know, there will be times when you'll be hungry, you'll be tired, there'll be rain fog, you know, you might have the energy to go out to the cinema or play with your kids. Whereas at maintenance, cherish that energy. You know, you do have that flexibility. And at the moment,
00:33:15
Speaker
I'm supposed to be in a deficit but because I've so much on socially I'm maintaining but you know what it's not the end of the world life will at some stage calm them down a small bit more but for me I'm happy I'm learning in that you know maintenance isn't a bad thing it's actually quite a good thing and I can still do everything I want but if you do the work while managing everything I think maintenance is just very very underrated I think maintenance is an extremely important phase to be in, and one that we don't tend to... like what I think what happens to a lot of people, first of all, is you know they'll die it down and they'll have done it quickly or they'll have done it the wrong way. They won't have put the habits in place. They won't have worked on the mindset patterns that need to be worked on.
00:34:04
Speaker
to believe that they could maintain this and then they end up back to square one. Like that's huge that's what happens to a lot of people. And then so that's the whole yo-yo dieting thing. And then it's like, Oh, another diet that didn't work. You know what I mean? And so like, that's a huge part of my coaching is, you know, we we do a lot of mindset work. We, one of our coaches, Charlotte, like she is a mindset. I have a mindset coach on my team but because I'm like, that's how important it is. Like it's just, it's so, so, so important our beliefs around ourselves. But for me, when I reached maintenance,
00:34:32
Speaker
One thing that I had, to you know, it was like, what's the next goal? yeah And what's the, and then it got to the point where I actually had to stop and be like, and I think it's really important to have this self-awareness as well. And took me a long time to get there.
00:34:46
Speaker
Why are you constantly trying to make yourself better, Kate? Why are you constantly trying to change yourself? yeah Are you not okay just as you are? And I'd never, never in my life just stopped and said, well, Kate, you're enough. Look at everything you've done. Look at everything you've achieved. Why don't you just celebrate that a little bit? But I do think there's a lot of pressure.
00:35:09
Speaker
from social media and from the fitness industry to constantly have goal after goal after. And if you're not you know working towards something, what are you doing? Yeah, but I'm, I'm, I'm challenging that now. I'm challenging that and I'm like, and this is what I'm going to be showing on my stories the next while is like I'm focusing really on food quality now. Like we're not supposed to be counting calories for the rest of our lives. I am not going to spend the rest of my life counting calories. Now I have, it's a skill, a skill that you get good at. You use it to lose body fat. You use it if you are deliberately building muscle and you use it for a while till you get used to your maintenance and then you take it away, you put it in your back pocket and you have it there if you need to tidy up along the way.
00:35:49
Speaker
But ah like alongside like healthy habits, healthy diet. So my focus is on health. I think anyone listening who has gotten to maintenance and feels like they're still not good enough or that they they have to achieve more, you have to start doing the deep work. it And this is what I'm doing now. the minute. I'm not by no means saying that I'm there. Like, will I do a photo shoot in the future? I might. Like, I don't know. I never say never. I'm not saying I'm against. ah Will I have extreme fitness goals again? Maybe. I don't know. Like right now, if like running a marathon or something would be my worst nightmare. But like, ask me five years time, I could be running a marathon. Who knows? And I'm very impulsive like that. I'll change my mind about things. And I think that's okay. But for now, it's very much a self-acceptance era that I'm in. And I want to pro promote
00:36:33
Speaker
normal weight. I want to promote normal health and not as a slight to people who want, like to one of my coaches, Lindsay is, two of my coaches, Lindsay and Holly are both working towards a photo shoot now. And I've, and I've seen it firsthand with Lindsay and she, I know she won't mind me talking about her. I hope she doesn't, but I've seen the dedication and the focus and the preparation that is going into that. And I think she is absolutely phenomenal. Yeah.
00:36:56
Speaker
And she's very aware that she's at the end stages of a diet. Now it's not pretty it's not healthy. We will talk photoshoot down a minute. It's not healthy at this stage. Like it's not. She knows that we're very, very clear on that with our clients, that this is a personal goal she's doing. My point is what I'm promoting is not saying that it's that you can't do photo shoots or you can't have extreme goals. And I think that's fantastic. But i I also think there's a place and our life like it goes ups and downs and there's different stages. You need to have phases of your life where you're okay with you and if you're not that you start talking to someone like I'm working with like a high performance psychologist at the minute really interesting so like I'm really kind of digging deep into like you know my own self beliefs and my you know which is which is really good like you know and I know not everyone's in a position to do that yeah but you know even with journaling or just getting you know working with a life coach or working with whoever to really just dig deep on on you know self acceptance self love and the health that comes with that
00:37:51
Speaker
doing it for you at the end of the day if you lose focus and if you're doing it for somebody else you're never going to be happy because at the end of the day your goals have to be for you and everyone's goals are different it doesn't matter what Mary down the road is doing as long as you're happy that's all that should matter and that's what maintenance is it's about getting to where you want to be and then maintaining that that you are happy at that you don't always have to have a goal and as you said that doesn't mean you can never have a goal again But you you can be happy at just, you know, doing you and being content at a stage in your
Balancing Life Goals
00:38:26
Speaker
life. You don't always yeah have to have the next goal. You don't have to have always had figured it out. Let's just say. Yeah. And exactly. And even like when I think about goals, like I look at my own life and I'm like, you know, I lost the weight I needed to to lose after having my kids. I got fit. It was a really important thing to me, you know, when I got strong and I did all these different things that I did and I've got myself to wear. And I'm really happy with that.
00:38:47
Speaker
For now, it is time for me as a person physically and mentally and emotionally to to sit with it and just reflect on myself a little bit and be happy with me. But I also have had a career change and I have a business that I'm growing. So a lot of my energy is going into my business. And someone told me once as well, I don't know who it was, that if there's like three main areas of your life, right, you've got your health and fitness goals.
00:39:12
Speaker
you've got your relationships of family and and romantic relationships and friendships, all relationships basically, and your career. you can only realistically push forward in two areas at the one time. you can't you can't do all if you If you're pushing all three, you're going to burn out. Or you'll think you're pushing all three, and one of them is going to be neglected. So initially, i was it was my own it was my personal goal. So relationships are non-negotiable for me. like you know ah My marriage is important to me, my children are important to me, my family, my friends. And even at that, you know what? I have been a shit friend. I have been a shit friend, but my life literally just hanging on with just
00:39:48
Speaker
you know, family and my marriage, like, and that's always going to be like, come first. And then I was pushing forward with my own personal goals and then business started to take on a little bit. And then, so now it's like taking the foot off that the personal goals a little bit now.
00:40:04
Speaker
being present with myself, with my family, like reconnecting with friends that i have I haven't connected properly with in a while, you know and kind of you know which is so, so important. and It's extremely fulfilling and I feel really happy and fulfilled at the minute, and I'm pushing forward with my career. and That's what I like to focus on, even when I'm talking to people, it's what I like to talk about, which is really boring. But anyway, that's where I'm at. I think any any women or men listening,
00:40:30
Speaker
If you're trying to push forward in every area of your life, look at those three areas, look at relationships, look at career, look at your personal, physical goals, emotional goals, and decide what needs most focus now. Pick two of them. Yeah, 100% agree with you. like you're not superhuman, you're not a robot, like you have to give yourself the break as well that like you know it's okay not to be perfect in every area and it's okay to take a step back in one area but as long as you're happy and you're content that's all that matters and there will be times when you know Career will be more important. There'll be time when your goals are more important. But it's just to be happy that, you know, you're content with your decision at that time. At the end of the day, everything isn't going to fall apart just because you're not given 110% to one or the other.
00:41:18
Speaker
Yeah. And you're not a tree. Life is not static. Things will change. You know, times will change and you will change and your goals will change and that's okay. So just because you said that, oh, I'm definitely going to do this photo shoot or I'm definitely going to do, and then you change your mind. That's okay. Like you don't want have to stick with it.
00:41:36
Speaker
That's what I say to my clients as well. Like I've had girls recently that joined and were like, right, want to lose weight, you know, that's main focus. Now the kids are off school and they have holidays planned and they've, they stand the other with friends and stuff. And I'm like, right, okay, I'm happy to keep you in a deficit right now, but at the moment, which is more important to you? Making time for your family and making memories and cherishing these times with family or being like, no, I can't do that because I'm on a diet.
00:42:05
Speaker
And it's okay for them to change. It's absolutely, and she can come back to me or they can come back to me in two weeks time and be like, right, I'm ready to go again. It doesn't always have to be all or nothing. You can have a mix of both. Yeah. And it's important to remember that, you know, if someone is on a long fat loss journey as well, you know, if you do have a few stone to lose, you're not going to do it in one big fat loss phase. You're going to do, like what we do is we like do like 10 week fat loss phases.
00:42:29
Speaker
Then we take a bit of a diet break for a couple of weeks and, you know, diet breaks are very structured, like we'll keep tracking. If the the client needs a break from tracking, we like we'll with usually factor them in around holidays, take a break from tracking altogether if needed. And then we get back in with a fresh head and we push forward. But like Aisling, the most rewarding text messages that I ever get from clients are a photograph of them on holidays, lying by the pool in their bikini with their cocktail or at their son's wedding in their outfit or at their own wedding in their wedding dress, being like, thank you so much. And I'm like, don't thank me, you did it. and You did it. That is the thing. At the end of the day, we're here to guide them. That's all we do. But they ultimately have to do the work and 100% agree with you. It's not getting messages of like, you know, I lost this amount of weight or I did this.
00:43:20
Speaker
it's how they feel that they're happy to get into that picture. They want to show you how good they feel and how good they look and how confident they are in themselves. And I completely agree. There's no better feeling than getting those pictures or getting those messages to be like, I've done it and I feel good in myself.
00:43:36
Speaker
And that's where the joy is. So if we don't get fixated in these numbers of being a certain size, being a certain number, and we're like, oh my God, I felt so amazing after that workout, lean into it, be like, what are you going to do? In other words, workout the next day because it makes me feel good. Really loved that walk. Right. I'm going to walk again tomorrow because it made me feel so good. And you know, and you're not always going to want to do what you want, what you say you're going to do, but like you choose to do it because you'd like, so at the minute, like I'm really focusing on food quality. I've actually stopped having a bit of chocolate just for a few days, just to see. Well, I had a bit of dark chocolate in my yogurt last night, but You know, that doesn't count. At the minute, it's nothing extreme. I'm not like, oh, cutting out anything. But I'm like, no, I'm just kind of eating like Mediterranean style diet the past few days. I feel amazing. Like, amazing. And I'm like, so now I'm like, ah I just kind of want to keep doing it because I'm leaning in to just see how I feel. Amazing. I'm going on holidays on Saturday for a week. up We're going to carry.
00:44:26
Speaker
Am I going to have lots of treats? Yes, because I'm also going to feel amazing having treats on holidays. And, but like within balance, i'll and i I'll share this on my stories and we'll get we kind of, we get that balance. But if you can lean into the feeling rather than the numbers, the numbers come, but it's, that's not where the reward is. It's it's that joyful moment where you are so delighted with yourself that you want to take photo and send it to your coach to celebrate. That's that. that what you're trying to capture. And, you know, not all life is going to feel that way. Life is ups and downs. You're not always going to feel amazing forever for the rest of your life. There'll be shit times as well. And you want you want to capture as much of that as you can. And you want to know how to get back to that. I 100% agree with me on this. It's not just about losing the most amount of weight. It's about giving
00:45:11
Speaker
clients, the education and the tools and knowledge that they have for life. that if but you know When that time comes that maybe it's a bad period of time and they want to tidy up again, they have that knowledge and they have those tools in their back pocket that they know exactly what to do.
00:45:25
Speaker
Yeah, exactly. And like, that's kind of how we structure our coaching. Like some coaches would say to me like, Oh, do you not get really like upset if someone leaves? It's like, yes, I'll miss a client. But if my job is done, like I've had a couple of ladies, two or three ladies finish up in the past few weeks or finishing up in the next few weeks, should I say they've reached their goal. They're maintaining their goal.
00:45:46
Speaker
And they're confident that they can keep a goal in themselves. Why are they going to continue to, you know, they don't need it. They don't need this anymore. My job is done. And that's what it's about. It's not to trick people into needing you forever. It's about, you know, being like, okay, you, you've got to your goal. That's what it's all about. And the thing is you have an opening then to help other women to do the same. Do you know what I mean? Whereas you don't want somebody to feel like they need you forever. You want to give them that confidence in themselves.
00:46:14
Speaker
that they can do with themselves as well. And it's such an amazing feeling to get a text message from a client that maybe has finished up with you a few months ago and they text you and be like, just a little update to let you know,
Community and Inspiration in Fitness
00:46:26
Speaker
I'm still maintaining my progress, still feeling amazing, still know exactly what to do, just have those daily habits and they're going nowhere. Brilliant, because I have given them that confidence in themselves that they can do this for the rest of their life.
00:46:42
Speaker
Yeah. And like, you need to remember, like without, okay, I'm going to sound so cheesy, but like we're all like little rays of sunshine. Like, and you know, so if it anyone listening who's on your journey, without even realizing it, you're inspiring your friends or your sisters or your cousins or your, your friends, friends, you know what I mean? To start their journey when they see how amazing you feel and look and behave. Like I, for a believer in, there's no point in like lecturing people. Oh, you should do this. You should do that. I'll definitely have to do this.
00:47:09
Speaker
just do it yourself. Do it your way. Shine you shine a little bit brighter yourself and you're inspiring a ring of others. So by just knowing it. I don't know about you Kate, but like the amount of sisters mothers and daughters, friends that I have, that I work with from one girl getting results and then like friends or like their mother or their sister being inspired and like, oh my God, if she can do it, I can do it too. And realizing that, you know, they don't have to give up their life. Like I've i had so many girls come to me and be like, oh my God, X, Y and Z looks amazing. and She feels great. I'm like, she can still have a life. And I'm like, yeah, you can do both.
00:47:50
Speaker
You just have to learn how to do it. And it's amazing to have that, I suppose, recommendation that I don't know if it's similar for you, but to hear people saying, oh, my God, she looks amazing and she has done it through your help. But at the end of the day, we're only here to guide. We're only here to guide. We can only give so much advice. They have to put in the work. But I think when people see other people can do it, it does give people the drive to want to do it themselves as well.
00:48:19
Speaker
Yeah. Yeah. So anyone listening who's, you know, might feel like they're struggling a bit and they're dieting away, they're getting places, but it's slow and it's, you know, just be patient, be consistent. And remember, you are inspiring the people around you without even realizing it. And chances are they won't say it to you. They won't. Most people won't say it to you.
00:48:36
Speaker
but they'll suddenly have started their own journey, so just keep going yeah and keep inspiring.
Fitness Photo Shoot Experience
00:48:40
Speaker
Right, I suppose before we finish up, I do, if it's okay with you, are you happy to share a little bit about your photo shoot journey, kind of some of the pros and cons, and like maybe just explaining a little bit beforehand what a fitness photo shoot, because I know some people listening might not be really familiar with this whole lifestyle. Yeah, so I've never talked about this case. I've never actually talked about why I did it or everything from it. So fitness photo shoot is essentially just, I suppose,
00:49:07
Speaker
challenging yourself physically and mentally. That was what it was for for me. It was a about challenging myself. I had done weight loss phases before. I had lost weight, but I had never gotten to the stage where I was lean, let's just say, okay? I wanted to just really challenge myself, and it was more so about undertaking something that I didn't think I was truly capable of doing, okay? I did the photo shoot,
00:49:33
Speaker
It was there and I suppose I'll get to the day in a minute but one thing I will remember from that day is James saying to me, I have never seen you smile as much in your whole entire life. As I said, I had done weight loss journeys before but this was different for me. This was about challenging myself and doing something that I genuinely didn't believe I could do and I suppose not saying leap from example because as I said I don't have clients that do photo shoots but I wanted to challenge myself to do something that I suppose I'm encouraging my clients to do to you know push out of your comfort zone do things that scare you take the leap into the unknown with you know changing their behaviors and stuff like that and for me I had done the weight loss I had the habits created but for me this was just a small bit further this was
00:50:20
Speaker
Huge, okay? And I'm not gonna lie, it was hard. It was bloody, bloody hard. But it was a hard I enjoyed. I suppose having that goal, it was 16 weeks of sacrifices. ah That's the way it was, okay? I had only two meals out in those 16 weeks. I did not drink for those 16 weeks. And it was easy for me to say no to those things to to things that were going on around me because I was doing it for me, but it was the people around me that I suppose it affected more. Like say, for instance,
00:50:50
Speaker
ge James gave up his life as well because I was doing this. You need support. You need that support from your inner circle to be able to do it because it is challenging. And I suppose having that support, it helped push on the harder days. Having that focus helped me push on the the harder days and it truly made me realize how disciplined I was. When you say you want something, I've said I want something so many times. I'll say I want to lose weight or I want to maintain or I want this, that and the other.
00:51:20
Speaker
but I truly realized that if I want something, I am capable of achieving it. And that's what the photo shoot did for me. i As I said, it was probably harder for the people around me. Like, it was intense. It was intense. You even said that they're Holly and Lindsay are doing one at the moment. So you know exactly the sacrifices that you have to move ahead. You know, you don't want to miss a training session. Your cardio is increased. It's whole foods. Like, as I said, I didn't eat out. I had two meals out and one was for,
00:51:48
Speaker
my mother's birthday and the other was for my friend Hen in 16 weeks and 16 weeks may not seem like a long time but it is when you're showing up for yourself every day and like that I was trying to build a business at the time I was obviously trying to keep my relationship on track during the time as well like you know like you said there it's trying to juggle all balls at the same time and it's hard it is hard but I suppose having that support and having that focus it was 16 weeks I was like I can do this And I showed up even when I didn't want to do it. I didn't make excuses when I wanted to make excuses. I was tired. I was miserable at times. I had a lot of bad poor body image days along the way. But I got there in the end and it was definitely tough, but it was a challenge I absolutely loved. And as I said to you, would I recommend it? Yes, but you do have to be aware of the pros and cons to it.
00:52:44
Speaker
Would I do it again? Never say never, okay? I'm not saying I will ever do it again, but I wouldn't rule it out either because the one thing I'll say is if I was to do it again, I would make sure, and I know we spoke about goals there a few minutes ago and not always happened to have a goal, but I do think after a photo shoot, you have to have some sort of idea what's next. And if that's just maintenance, great. But my biggest con to my photo shoot was I did not reverse properly.
00:53:12
Speaker
I was lost after my photoshoot. I suppose I didn't know what was next for me. Now look, it didn't help that I had an all-inclusive holiday booked for the week after my photoshoot. I had three friends' weddings within a week after I came back. But because then the scales started to creep up a small bit, I felt a bit lost. I panicked a small bit and I probably turned food a small bit more. So that would be the one side. The mentally hard part wasn't actually doing the photo shoot. The mentally hard part was reversing out of it. And if there's one thing I could say to people if they are thinking about doing the photo shoot, make sure you prioritize the reverse because
00:53:54
Speaker
I'll be open and honest and say, I didn't. And that's where I struggled. It wasn't actually the showing up during, it was the the struggle afterwards that I struggled with. Yeah. to And just to kind of explain to people, I suppose, that the reverse, being the reverse diet, where you gradually bring calories back up and get yourself back to maintenance because, yeah, like it's extremely important because you don't want to, otherwise you're just diving headfirst into, to, to Bingeville, basically. 100%. And that is probably what happened to me. Now, don't get me wrong. I was actually never, I was
00:54:27
Speaker
quite lucky I was never on extreme low calories like I my calories never went below I think 1600 like I was quite lucky I my activity was very very high though very very high but that's just the lifestyle I was leading at the time but I think for me it was that just bringing calories back up was scary because obviously I've seen the number going down for so long and just because I'm a coach doesn't mean I'm not a human. I do struggle with those things as well like I still remember vividly
00:54:59
Speaker
two weeks before my photo shoot I was looking in the mirror and I thought I was fat and my abs were protruding through me and I still thought so like although when you're as lean as I was back then it's still you can still have bad body image days it doesn't mean you know about it bad body image days only come when you have a bit of weight on or you don't feel 100% comfortable there's two sides to the story and that's why I always say to people as well Never judge anyone just because somebody may look like you know they don't have any way to lose or they don't don't ever comment on somebody because you don't know what's going on in the background as well. Because I remember at the time everyone was like, oh my God, you look amazing. And yeah, I did. But did I feel amazing?
00:55:44
Speaker
On the day, yes, I did, because I was glammed up, I had my makeup done, I had my hair done, I had my tan done, and I was on front of that camera posing like, you know, I was a Victoria's Secret model. But apart from that day, was it sustainable long-term? No. And I suppose that's the bit I maybe was unaware of, and that was the reverse dieting back up to maintenance and being content that I couldn't keep that body for the rest of my life thank you so much for sharing that because i know that it is here for as you said the first time sharing it and i know it's extremely personal and thank you for being so honest about it because i think photos shoots are quite glamorized now a lot of people will see people doing photos shoots online and you know, and they see the finished products and people look amazing in photo shoots. And I think a lot of people don't realize the sacrifice that goes into it and like this giving up life and it does affect relationships. Like, so when we're looking at those three areas, like that, that that relationships area really gets sacrificed, but also your hormone health and your first dieting, but the huge part, like you said there, that your mindset and your, your relationship to yourself and your body and to food.
Fitness Goals and Personal Satisfaction
00:56:55
Speaker
And like, as I was going to do a photo shoot, and that was actually one reason why I decided not to, well, first what a tomb would go like. But second of all, I was like, for me at the minute, it goes against my beliefs around health and around hormone health and female health and what I, what I stand for and what I promote. Now that doesn't mean you can't do a photo shoot and just get to a healthy body image. And that's important to remember. If there's anyone listening who wants to photo shoot, it I'm sure it's an extremely empowering experience. As you said, you felt amazing on the day. It doesn't mean you need to diet yourself down to losing your period.
00:57:29
Speaker
to do a photo shoot. You can do a photo shoot at a size 16 if you want to do a photo shoot. and it's It's about making a commitment and celebrating you. 100%. And the thing is, kid, it's not about being the leanest version of you. It's about being the most confident version of you. And like you said, it doesn't matter what size you are.
00:57:49
Speaker
If you are confident in yourself, and this is what I just want to say as well, that like, it doesn't matter what size you are. At the end of the day, there's a big difference between feeling good and looking and good. Because if you're only looking good and not feeling good, why does it matter? Because you need to feel.
00:58:08
Speaker
that you need to feel good in order to have a happy and healthy life. And I think what people are experiencing, you know, the positive side of that photo shoot is, you know, like you've worked so hard for 16 weeks towards this event, it's a goal. And you do feel amazing for achieving that goal. And that's fantastic. And the the dedication and hard work goes into that, deserves to be celebrated. It's similar.
00:58:30
Speaker
to, let's say someone who runs a marathon and you train for months to do a marathon or a triathlon or what, you know, 5k, it doesn't matter. Like, but that feeling you get when you do something that you didn't know that you could do. Like I remember, like I did CrossFit for a long time and I like, I remember doing my first CrossFit competition and that feeling of being able to do something or even like just do, you know, like learning to do box jumps, learning to do pull ups, like all of these things where it was like, wow, I didn't know I could do that. And I did.
00:59:00
Speaker
And that's the feeling of having a goal to work towards and reaching it. When people are choosing goals, it's so important. What goal do you actually want? Do it for you. Yeah, do it for you. Don't sign up for a photo shoot because you think, oh, you're going to look unreal. Because if you don't fix your problems with your own relationship with your body, photo shoot's going to make it worse. It's going to make it so much worse. And if you have a healthy relationship with your body,
00:59:29
Speaker
do you do you want to do one? like just And if you do, great, just make sure you want to do one. But again, if to anyone that does think that they want to do it, treat it as a confidence shoot, not a photo shoot. That's what I would say to people. Treat it as a confidence shoot that you don't have to be And I think that's what I got caught up in as well towards the end is that I was comparing to other girls that had done photo shoots around the same time as me. And I'm like, oh, I'm not that lean. I don't look as good. Oh, my God, what am I doing? It's not about anybody else. It's about how you feel on the day and the work you've put in. And I suppose, as you said, celebrating, celebrating the dedication and the commitment you've given to yourself. And, you know, having that day that you can shine and feel
01:00:17
Speaker
You're absolutely bloody amazing in yourself. Kind of like your wedding day. It's like when you're in your wedding dress and you're getting your photos taken at that moment. Except you don't have to have the husband for it. It's just all about you. And there will always be someone leaner than you, skinnier than you, stronger than you, prettier than you, smarter than you. If you spend your life in a comparison game, whether it's to do a photo shoot or work or, you know, fitness or races, whatever, focus, stay in your lane.
01:00:44
Speaker
Focus, I guarantee you anyone who's ever achieved anything great, were wasn't worried about the person beside them when they did it. They were focused, they were in the zone, they were focusing on them. And I think that's important to remember. 100% agree. Ashling, this was an amazing conversation. Thank you so much for all that you shared and all the wisdom and advice you have given.
01:01:05
Speaker
Thank you so much for having me on, Kate. I've absolutely loved
Connect with Ashling and Kate
01:01:08
Speaker
it. If people would like to follow you and find out a little bit about your, look at your photo shoot photos and find out a bit about your coaching and all of that, where is the best place to find you? The best place to find me would be on Instagram. So my page on Instagram is Ashfish Coaching. So A-I-S-F-I-T coaching. So that would be the best place to find me. I do have a Facebook, but I want to say stick with Instagram. Thank you so much.
01:01:35
Speaker
Thanks so much for having me. Bye bye.
01:01:43
Speaker
I just want to say thank you so much for listening to the podcast. It really means so much to me that there are people out there actually listening to what I have to say and to the conversations that I'm having with others. So thank you so much. If you are enjoying the podcast, could you please make sure that you are subscribed? And if not, if you could hit that subscribe button, it really does make that much of a difference. Also, if you would like to leave a review on any of the episodes that you listen to that you particularly enjoy. I would love to hear what you have to say. And also, if there's an episode that you've enjoyed, please do share it on your social media, in your WhatsApp groups with your friends. If you're sharing it on your stories, please tag myself in it and whoever I'm interviewing, this it would be greatly appreciated.
01:02:25
Speaker
Also, if you're interested in working with me and my wonderful team, please do you contact me about applying for coaching. So you can contact me at Kate Hamilton Health at gmail dot.com or on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, all Kate Hamilton Health, and you will be able to apply for coaching. We can organize to have a chat and see if it's a good fit for you and get you moving towards your goals.