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#106: Emma McKee: Overcoming an eating disorder and embracing fitness
555 Plays2 months ago
Have you ever felt trapped in a cycle of negative self-talk, disordered eating, or struggling to find balance in your fitness journey?
In this episode of The Kate Hamilton Health Podcast, I sit down with Emma McKee, a leading personal trainer and 2024’s Belfast’s Best PT winner, to discuss her powerful journey from battling bulimia for 11 years to becoming an advocate for mental health, self-care, and strength training.
Emma opens up about the mental and emotional toll of an eating disorder, how she found the courage to seek help, and the pivotal role that fitness and mindset shifts played in her recovery. We also dive into the evolution of the fitness industry, why more women are stepping into strength training, and how she transitioned from in-person coaching to building a thriving online business - all while navigating motherhood.
If you’re ready to learn how to break free from toxic cycles, build a stronger, healthier mindset, and embrace fitness as a tool for empowerment rather than punishment, this episode is for you.
Episode Highlights:
[00:00] – Welcome to The Kate Hamilton Health Podcast
[01:24] – Meet Emma McKee: Belfast’s Best PT & Advocate for Mental Health
[01:45] – Emma’s Journey into Personal Training & Overcoming Struggles
[02:29] – How the Fitness Industry Has Evolved for Women
[03:38] – The Importance of Female Personal Trainers in Today’s Industry
[06:30] – Transitioning from In-Person Coaching to Online Success
[08:51] – Balancing Motherhood, Business & Mental Well-being
[11:58] – Emma’s 11-Year Struggle with Bulimia & The Road to Recovery
[18:27] – The Turning Point: Seeking Help & Overcoming Mental Barriers
[23:15] – How Motherhood Shifted Her Mindset on Health & Self-Care
[27:53] – The Role of Personal Development in Healing & Growth
[29:03] – Understanding Emotions, Triggers & Mental Health Challenges
[30:20] – The Power of Breathwork & Tapping for Anxiety & Healing
[31:00] – Exploring Alternative Healing Methods & Self-Discovery
[34:14] – Taking Personal Responsibility for Growth & Change
[38:21] – Managing Panic Attacks, Stress & Anxiety in Daily Life
[40:58] – Why Personal Routines & Boundaries Are Non-Negotiable
[49:49] – Finding Joy in Exercise & Shifting Your Relationship with Fitness
[55:22] – Redefining Health: What It Really Means to Live Well
Links & Resources:
- Connect with Emma on Instagram here
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with friends who might benefit. For more health and fitness tips, follow me on Instagram and TikTok @katehamiltonhealth.
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Transcript
Introduction of the Episode and Guest
00:00:07
Speaker
Hello everyone and welcome back to another episode of the Kate Hamilton health podcast. So in today's episode, I chat with Emma McKee. Emma is a personal trainer based in Belfast, Northern Ireland. And apart from her absolutely gorgeous accent, we have the most amazing conversation. She is recognized as the Belfast best PT winner in 2024. She has over 16 years experience in the health and fitness industry.
00:00:35
Speaker
including a decade as a personal trainer. Emma specializes in empowering women to develop healthier relationships with their bodies and with food.
Emma's Personal Journey and Mental Health
00:00:43
Speaker
We dive into a lot of topics around mindset. She shares with us her story of how she struggled with an eating disorder, how she overcame this eating disorder, how she has dealt with struggles with mental health. We talk about mental health, we talk about overcoming trauma, we talk a lot around the topic of personal development and the power and the empowerment that fitness can bring as well. This is a truly inspiring conversation. Emma is an absolute inspiration and I think you're all really, really going to enjoy this episode.
00:01:24
Speaker
Hey Emma, how are you? Hi. Welcome to the podcast. Thank you very much for having me. I'm all over the moon. Yeah, no, I'm looking forward to chatting about all the different things that I know is got we're just we've so much to talk about. Before we get into it, do you want to let everyone know a little bit about your background, who you are, what you do, and kind of what's got you to where you are today? Yes, well, I'm a UK PT. I've been personal training and I for, I'd say about 13 years. Growing up, I always knew I wanted to do something in with fitness or sport like that, but I went to university to become a PE teacher, and I soon realised that I didn't want to work for anybody else. I'm sure you know that. You know what I mean? I done my personal training on the side of my uni degree, and instead of coming out of uni and being a PE teacher, I just went straight into full-time personal training.
Evolution of the Fitness Industry and Coaching
00:02:11
Speaker
Obviously, I was just on the gym floor for the last maybe 12 years, and it's only this last year I've actually got into online training, in online coaching.
00:02:19
Speaker
And that's where life started to change when I met like minded people like yourself and kind of joined the mentorship and stuff like that. But yeah, that's sort of my story on why I'm a personal trainer and stuff. That's amazing. So you actually, like in relation to like the fitness industry, like you've seen how much that's changed in 12, 13 years, like what's what it's developed into.
00:02:38
Speaker
how much it's great, how much it's changed. See, whenever I was a personal trainer, there wasn't another female one that I knew in Belfast. If I think back, when I was a personal trainer back then, there was no other female PT, the competition, but now there's loads of us and it's great because there's enough people to go riding as well. Do you know what I mean?
00:02:57
Speaker
Yeah, so you you were very much then, because you're based in Belfast, aren't you? Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. so So you were like the go-to female PT in Belfast. and Yeah, probably. There's not even a joke I'm going to say, like the probably one of the only ones. Like it was very rarely heard of like 10, 12 years ago that there wasn't many ah female PTs floating about, like maybe like ones that were like fitness instructors, you know, like got but like solo PTs. There wasn't many of them. So it was Time for good, yeah. So now it's the time where you have to do something different. You don't like to stand out because theres there is so many people doing it, isn't there?
00:03:32
Speaker
Yeah, but yeah and the business side of things, yeah, to be able to establish yourself to yeah to stand out from the crowd. But I think it's amazing that, you know, if you think back 12 years ago, that it was mostly a male-dominated industry, it still is more male-dominated, but, you know, us women are coming up in it. And it's great because I would say, I don't know, maybe you know the statistics, but I would imagine that people who actually, you know, get the help of a PT, the higher percentage is going to be women that are, are using personal trainers. And I know men do as well, but I would imagine that the percentage of women using personal trainers is higher than the percentage of men. So it makes sense that we have female female personal trainers too, that actually understand, not that men can't, but you know, it's nice to see us women helping other women so that you have the option to have a female personal trainer.
00:04:21
Speaker
I don't know about you, but I get a lot of female clients now who say that they've been with a male before and they just feel like it, not like um men are amazing too, but I mean they just feel like they didn't understand them as much as maybe a woman was, like a woman knows a woman's body, do you know what I mean? yeah you Like when that time of the month's coming we know when things are going to get hard. So I do think it's really good that they can relate to women that way.
00:04:42
Speaker
Yeah, and I think that saying that, you know, women are not small men is so true, that it's not the same and we need to be very much looked after in a di from a different perspective. Yeah, completely. And even like training programs and stuff like that, like they do differ, like women do, all them kind of different oh obviously you have to train and every single muscle, like some actually strong, but women do want different things and men, so like your training programs are going to be different.
00:05:08
Speaker
Like males do advertise themselves as they're shown to do like female only fat loss. They don't even take on like, they don't even take on males. They'll just take on women. And I think that, you know, everyone listening needs to be careful because when you're choosing a coach, whether it's an online coach or an in-person coach, and they're saying female only, and actually I had a conversation with a woman at an event I was at yesterday about there was a personal trainer in her gym who was advertising over 50s personal trainer. It turned out that he was very much just, no, he just wanted to get anyone in really. And I think there are some amazing men out there who really have studied in female health and really do
00:05:43
Speaker
specialised there and and that they're such an asset to the fitness industry but there's also a lot of people out there who are saying I'm a female only coach because they're like oh that's where I'll get more clients in and so it is to be careful with who you pick really isn't it yeah definitely make sure you've done your research yeah for a play to men doing that though you know the ones that actually do know a lot some of them probably know more about the women's body than what I do but for a play to those Yeah, absolutely. You know, and it's, and it's great to see because I think it's really important that men and men are getting so much more aware of the different struggles that women, you know, in their monthly cycle. And then, you know, as we move towards, um, perimenopause as well, you know, that the fact that they are learning more about this and understanding more is a really, really positive thing. But even like with personal trainers as well, and I kind of get this a lot when people are kind of applying for coaching, you probably do as well. It's a very different job now, isn't it? Like it's kind of the industry has kind of divided a little bit that some people will come to me.
00:06:36
Speaker
looking for like in-person coaching, which I don't do anymore. I, you know, very much work online with lifestyle, nutrition, mindset, community, and you know, you obviously get workout programming within that, but that's a very different job to being in the gym, working with someone on their biomechanics and actually being beside them when they're training. So I think some people are still unaware that, you know, that there are kind of two separate services now really, aren't there? they are big time like you would need I think get a big part of it you need to do you need to be independent in a way like to be online coach don't you need to have some we had a wits about you for going into the gym beforehand or as if you're a complete beginner probably is probably better off you to go on in person coach or learn a wee bit first you know what I mean
00:07:24
Speaker
Definitely. I think, and I would often say this to people when i'm I'm speaking to them about coaching. I'm like, you know, when it comes to strength training, if you've never done an ordeal or a squat, or if you don't know how to do these movements, you are best to work with someone in person for a little while, even in a, you know, a small group personal training setting or a class where you can learn these movement patterns. And once you have a general idea of these movement patterns, then online coaching is a great way to really push yourself forward.
00:07:49
Speaker
Yeah, I've had a few people, complete, fresh beginners who wanted to join me and they actually live in Belfast, so I'm like, right, I can actually meet you and we'll do like a form check, but I mean, if you're attracting people that aren't near you, you can't do that all the time. But for the ones who do these posts, like I would always, because it's always on my mind, it's always on my mind going, what way are they training in the gym? You know, like you can't, you can't watch them like a hawk all the time, but it does, I don't know.
00:08:14
Speaker
That's the in-person, personal trainer coming out in you where you're like, I need to see what we're doing. yeah I still coach. I still do. but Like I'm in the gym probably, I'd say six, seven hours a week. That's not long. But the reason being is like, cause I literally walk in that gym and I just feel amazing. Like I just feel like I'm vibing.
00:08:34
Speaker
and they all kind of like tail them together you know what i mean so it's not like i'm not just you know i'm not going to understand one-to-one so my time's very still still much so free but i when and i still coach them and i just have so i just love it i don't know whether it's because i can't depart from that old self i think it's lovely and i can really really relate to this the very last in-person thing that i gave up was my classes i had you know female only classes wow they're all busy moms you know coming together and the only thing is the only reason why i gave this up i will be still doing it to this day because i loved it like you said that just being around these amazing women and just you know the energy and everyone's you know getting stronger and fitter and just so amazing the reason why i gave it up was it
00:09:15
Speaker
it didn't fit with my lifestyle with my kids at home because it was evening time. And then with my business growing, I was up very early in the mornings getting my work done before my kids got got up for school. And then, you know, there's that chunk of the day where I had to be a parent and get them to and from school. And, you know, it was just really exhausting having an evening class with the early mornings. And I also then had like GAA and, you know, football. So I was, you know, like all of those things. And my, like my husband Dave was like, I can't be in two places at once.
00:09:44
Speaker
And like, my parents are great for helping out. I was like, but yeah, look, this is just, it's time, but it was a really, really hard decision for me to let it go. And I'll still see some of these ladies. They'll be like, Kate, you're not going to bring the classes back. And I'm like, I would love to, but I just can't right now.
Overcoming Bulimia and Emotional Healing
00:09:58
Speaker
I might someday. You know what, this is actually meant to be because you're actually speaking to me while I'm on three right now. This was meant to be big time because I actually said to myself last week, I was like, I may cancel my, I only do two evenings. It's only a Monday and a Thursday, but i want like i could like I'm training for a triathlon at the minute and I want to join a team so in me that's a my priority is training for that and I probably need to use those two evenings. The only two nights that I could get maximized is maybe a selfish thing but I actually spoke myself about this last week when I think I'm going to have to start dropping evenings or lord like bring it down a bit because to move forward, as much as we don't want to do it, like to move forward sometimes it's necessary isn't it? like Some of the girls are 10 years and stuff and
00:10:40
Speaker
I just know that they, like, some of them will be like, no, I'm not doing only coaching, you know what I mean? And I think when you make that step, like I knew very much when I was taking that step away from my class that most of my ladies were not going to come online with me because it's not what they were there for. And it's a really, really hard decision to make to let it go. But I think when you really do have to also put your own energy, your own health and your own family first and finding that right balance. And that's for anyone listening who's trying to be everyone to everything to everyone. You know, we only have so much time. You only have so much energy and, and you know, this life, this lifestyle that we're all trying to lead.
00:11:15
Speaker
to be healthier, fitter, stronger. It's a marathon. It's not a sprint. And we have to be able to get up and and have that energy every day. and And there's only so much that we can do before we start burning out. It's like I've struggled to have some like quiet time like lately, but I noticed it's so important for me to do as well. Like when you wake up in the morning, like every day was just like,
00:11:36
Speaker
Like, there was something after, do you know what I mean? There was something that we are. I've kind of noticed lately, like, I need to take some time just to maybe do nothing. Yeah. It's literally the struggle of the busy mother, isn't it? This is, you know, me, it's you, it's the women that I work with. I'm sure the women that you're working with as well. It's about trying to balance the time and have the focus for you. I really want to talk to you about your training.
00:11:58
Speaker
But before I do, I think it would be beneficial if we but if we talked a little bit about your past relationship with food and with exercise so that it gives us the context of how far you've come and how much your mindset has changed and what exercise and fitness is for you now. So if it's all right with you, could we dive into your past a little bit and what some of the struggles that you've been through? yeah as I used to come across maybe as the best female PT in Belfast, visually on social media looked like she had it all going together but she was in fact like a broke wee girl and say so whenever I was in I started at the gym maybe when I was like 16 and around 17 I was ah I started very quickly on restrictive dating the person that was giving me the deaths
00:12:43
Speaker
never really knew, they never really knew what they were doing back then anyway, but I was just following it anyway and say it was like fish and broccoli four or five times a day. And I was really, really under eating and I started to drop weight really quickly, which I kind of loved, but it was still only like 16, 17 years old. It's very, very young age to start anything like that. And then 17 years old is whenever I developed my eating disorder. So I was benimic for 11 years of my life that's 17 until I was 28 until I actually fell pregnant my max it lasted right up until then I would have only been okay with myself if I'd have just had clean foods so like your fish your broccoli your do you know what I mean anytime I labeled foods as good and bad so obviously all the the broccoli the chicken that was all the good food and then kind of like the pizza the Chinese and stuff like that was bad food so obviously I was getting mad mad cravings whenever I was like
00:13:36
Speaker
whenever I was restricting so much. So anytime I'd have got those cravings, and I'd have given that food, I'd have had a Chinese but maybe with my boyfriend at the weekend. I'd have made myself sick after. I'd just started like nine again, maybe months a week. And I made myself sick because I was like, I can't have this bad food in my body. Like, I thought this was going to make me fat overnight. You know what I mean? I did not have, I had a really poor per relationship with food. I didn't understand nutrition. I was still like, it was before I'd done my PT course, but even after that,
00:14:06
Speaker
whenever you do do your PT course you don't really learn too much in depth about ah about nutrition. So yeah it started off maybe at a dot once a week at the weekends after a Chinese or whatever and then it went on once a day and then it went on to maybe 10 times a day.
00:14:23
Speaker
So it started off if it was any bad food on my body, like bad food, like your Chinese, your takeaways, like I don't want that out of my system. I used to get really a like bad anxiety over it if it was inside me. And as soon as I would have been sick, it's class, is set it's actually class of self harm. So as soon as I was sick after it, it used to, it used to make me feel like I can breathe again. Do you know what I mean?
00:14:43
Speaker
Then it started with any sort of, the relationship with food got worse. So it was even like if I woke up and if I'd have had a bowl of porridge instead of just having eggs on their own, because I knew that there was carbs in porridge and pi and you you know everybody like back in the day used to think that carbs were bad for you, which they're not carbs or what I live for now like. So because if I had carbs, I'm like,
00:15:04
Speaker
Right, I can't have that in my wallet, it used to be sick. So it just shows, I was ah like, this went on for a long time. This went on right through my personal training career. So even whenever I was a personal trainer and people were looking up to me, like I would have told other people maybe to eat carbs, but I didn't believe that they were good for you. I thought that they were bad for you because anytime I sort of would have at them, I would have offered them up.
00:15:25
Speaker
and There is a lot more to an eating disorder than just the food side of it. I think that kind of triggered it, but I think with an eating disorder, a lot of it's to do with being in control. I think with me growing up, I was a girl who really suppressed her emotions her whole life. So like right up until I was 28 years old, I can remember saying to my friends, like I've never felt the emotion anger.
00:15:46
Speaker
So if you think there's 28 years of like never being angry, where is that emotion going? That makes me understand it so much. I was pouring that emotion into the food, and into the cupboards when I was getting those feelings coming up. Instead of speaking them, instead of voicing them, I was ignorant. So it's like I was emotionally ignorant. And then because I was eating so much, I was throwing it back up again. It took me, a lot obviously, a long time to understand. That's what was happening. So whenever you suppress an emotion, like that like cream has to come to the top somewhere. I think I understand whenever I was 17 there was stuff that was trying to come out like certainly I wouldn't have never, I thought I wasn't allowed to cry but things were different back then growing up like traditional household stuff like that. I would never have cried, I would never have been sad, I would never have been angry so I think my disorder was a lot to do where that was the only place that I was in control of my life like I can control this here and then it just obviously got worse and it got worse and worse and I
00:16:43
Speaker
I honestly don't think that I ever thought that it would ever go away from me. Like, I used to wake up and go, I'm going to do this for the rest of my life. Like, I wouldn't have left the house in the morning without being sick. Like, it started off maybe with bad food at the start. But see, it like, as it went on, it was habitual. So if you do something every day, like, it's in your routine, basically. It's like brushing your teeth. Yeah, it's part literally what you do. that Yeah. So it was like, it started to be like where I would have just, just even woke up in the morning at like dry crackers, drank water.
00:17:12
Speaker
just so I could be sick and leave the house. See when I speak about it, it's like going, that was mental. And even at the time when I tried to explain it to anybody, nobody could understand it, which is obviously the biggest reason why I'm actually doing this. to like I did take it to social media to speak about it because whenever I was going through it, there was no help for it because people don't understand it. Unless you've been through it, you don't understand it. I would have just made sure I was sick before I left the house because it was my emotion. Something was trying to come up with me. like There was something trying to break through in me and it just needed to spoke to somebody. I just needed to sit down and speak to somebody. But when that emotion, emotion arise to me, I just went, food, like, it's like being, it's like people like who are, like, if you're addicted to drugs or if you're addicted to alcohol, like it's, that it's your coping mechanism. So that was my coping mechanism. It gets your way, isn't it, to like, numb the pain, the, the uncomfortable feeling inside you that you can't, you're like, oh, I need to do something about this right now.
00:18:05
Speaker
And if I woke up and I felt like that, I was like, right, i knew my that was my coping mechanism. I knew what to do. I was like, right, eat something, drink something, be sick. And then I went, I can leave the house, which, you know what I mean? It's it's pretty pretty sad looking back on it. But I mean, I'm so glad that I then under understood that it was a coping mechanism that there and that there is other coping mechanisms. Did the people in your life know what was going on with you or was this very much like kept?
00:18:33
Speaker
probably Well, it was kept to me, I would say, for a year, right? But it was, I noticed it was just, it got like, it was like far, how quickly that it got worse. So I would never have told any like friends or anything that because I was, I think it was because I was a PT. And and that brought me so much shame. Like I felt like I'm a fraud here because I can't even keep my own food down, and I'm telling people what to eat, you know what I mean? But I can remember going into my parents' bedroom, building it up the courage, sitting in my own room, building up the courage for like an hour, going in and telling them, like, when we're early, like, I can't stop making myself be sick. But they didn't have a clue what the fuck I was talking about. Like, they didn't know what, like, they've never heard of bulimia before. I think I was expecting this big, like, helping hand, or like, this is what we do, or
00:19:20
Speaker
you know what I mean? But it wasn't ever like that so it kind of like drifted away. I remember bringing myself as a young girl to the doctors and again with that I think I waited maybe three four years before even getting seen and whenever I was seen it was just never what I expected it to be because if you struggle with an eating disorder a massive trigger for you is getting your way took right? So as soon as you go into these clinics they ask you to stand on scales So automatically I felt that I wasn't safe and they couldn't help me, you know what I mean? They were pointing the finger rather than there to help. mean I mean, like that's just the way, that's not their fault, that's the way that they're told what to do with it. But I just never felt like my problems were ever eased in those rooms.
00:20:04
Speaker
and the time that I actually got took seriously was like this is really sad too whenever I fell pregnant with Max right when I was 28 years old this was 11 years deep into the eating disorder and ah then they put me into like the White House it's like a mental health institution but it was the reason because it's because I was now seen as damaging another person and like they were like talking about social services and stuff to me which I was just like still like really badly bulimic and it wasn't like are you okay? How can I help you with this? Like it was just more like you're you were made to feel like shit even more but at the same time that saved my life being pregnant with Max because there was something else inside me that I had to look after and even though I didn't care about myself I like self-sabotaged myself.
Transition to Motherhood and Mental Health
00:20:50
Speaker
I didn't have somebody else inside me now where I was like right
00:20:52
Speaker
I have to stop being sick now so he was kind of my savior in that story which which was lovely but and this is the reason why I was like I need to speak I need to speak to the world about this I need to talk to the world about this because I needed people so much like I needed Emma this is just shocking like 11 years and not that you were like I don't have a problem i you know leave me alone this was I need help and the help was not there no nothing that's not one thing but I know that it doesn't matter. If I had a set up with a therapist, there was actually, you know what, there was one time where I had a good experience, right? And it was, I just put it myself. i used so I was only a young girl, like I didn't know what to do, but I found free free therapy. And it was like Corpus Christi and Belfast.
00:21:36
Speaker
and it was like for eight weeks it's never here see is it cbt therapy yeah be behavior a behavioral therapy so basically they gave you like almost tasks at the end of every session you know like she gave me like wee tasks if i could do this both i could be sick for like two days or like three just stuff like that and she was very understanding and listening and she was probably the only one that couldn't give me that fear factor or? CBT is absolutely amazing. i CBT is what helped me recover from an anxiety disorder. To this day, I still very much think in a CBT way. I kind of nearly forget that it it was only I interviewed a CBT therapist here on the podcast. I was like, oh, I still think like that. I forgot that that's what I actually learned when I was 21 in therapy. like
00:22:20
Speaker
That's insane, it just carries on. but like that was about me Maybe it is just that type of therapy then, because that was the only thing. But see, once that ended, I just like must have forgot what she taught me. But after that eight weeks was over, and he see when I speak at night, it guess make gives me like heart palpitations or something because it's back in the day, it was still 11 years of my life. It was my whole life, like it was mental.
00:22:44
Speaker
yeah But I think all struggles and all, and even the most horrific things that happen, I do believe that they're all placed there for a reason. They're all placed there to make us stronger. And in order, like, and I say this on the podcast a lot, like, I really do believe we are all put here to contribute, to make the world a better place. I know that sounds so... Cringy. Every single one of us has something that we're supposed to offer to the world, the people around us. The fact that you have gone through this, that you've come out the other side and you are now in a position to speak about this yeah is extremely powerful. Talk to us a little bit about, okay, so you got pregnant at 28 with Max, your son, and how old is Max now? Max is five years old now. Five years old, okay. so hi I actually can't believe it.
00:23:27
Speaker
ah This is the turning point then of your, your recovery. I could say it was the turn of point of the eight disorder, but not my mental health. I think it was a turn of point of the eight disorder, but then I found other cop mechanisms. Well, not as much like, but to say like. Whenever I had Max, it was probably one of the hardest times of my life. I didn't know how to transition between being a PT on the floor 12 hours a day to a stay-at-home mom. It was during COVID as well, so I had Max over COVID, and like it was lock-in, and it was just me and him in the house. Me and his daddy and stuff weren't together, so it was like, that was a big, big teaching for me because I didn't... And didn' you weren't living with your family, it was just you and Max. Me and Max.
00:24:10
Speaker
And this was over COVID. It was hell. And I, me personally, like, even though with a bulimia, bulimia doesn't make you drop weight or anything like that, it's just people that are bulimic, they usually look the same, you know what I mean? Like, you would never go to, like, you have an eating disorder. But whenever I had Max, it's whenever people actually thought that I was really sick with it, because I dropped three or four stone. Like, i I was, I've always been like quite a good chunky girl, always had her food, stuff like that. But I was so depressed when I had Max, like,
00:24:37
Speaker
I suffered really badly with it. I think it's just because of the whole change of who I used to be. I used to be out working from when I was 15 years old to Justice. I'm in the house. I don't know who I am. I'm just a mother now. I didn't have any other life. I didn't train. I maybe done the odd wee walk or something, but I just kind of went to the opposite side. I just kind of stopped eating a bit. I just wasn't hungry. I was very depressed. Posting out the rest. Would have drank way more alcohol than what I'd ever drank in my life, which is scary because you've just had a baby. It's the last thing that you want to be doing it. But that was another time where I put my emotions into a substance and instead of like speaking to somebody or like what's going on with you, do you know what I mean? But I don't regret like seeing when I think back, like I was supposed to go through those hard times. I was really supposed to go through them because I feel like that's why I'm so strong today. Like I'm really, really strong today, which is amazing.
00:25:32
Speaker
I can totally relate to that. Like I had my first child at 23, he's going to be 15 next week, which I can't believe that's how old my world was. I don't know how, cause I'm so young. You know, I'm only 25. So I don't know how this happened, but it's like that identity shift of you're suddenly not this young girl anymore. You're a parent. your body is not the same as it used to be that shocked my body like it was nearly like i was a very anxious young person i had done a lot of the therapy work before i had jayden but then a lot of it kind of came up again post-nately you know a lot of that anxiety probably a little bit of postnatal depression but it was much more kind of on the anxious side of the spectrum like panic attacks you know tight chest that kind of stuff yeah and just i remember when he was born and i was convinced he was going to die
00:26:19
Speaker
I was like, my God, I can't like, I would just like fixated with this whole kind of cut death thing and being like, Oh my God, he's not going to be okay. Yeah, it was just out of control, but I didn't really talk about it with anyone because it was just kind of the thoughts that were going on in my head. And it took me months to really settle into motherhood and enjoy it with him. Like I i i was just always so afraid. I was actually afraid to be alone with him as well for the first six weeks or so. You know, I was like, Oh, please, you know, like, Dave had a little bit of time off work. So I just, it was a really, really difficult time. So I can really relate to that, that kind of coping my mechanism of alcohol as well to make you feel better. It was the only time that I didn't feel anxious, but then alcohol would then make me feel more anxious then for like the next day later. And then when I finally start to feel better, I'd be like, oh, it's the weekend again. That was a huge cycle for me to to break free from. So I can totally relate. How did you put push past this stage then? Like the push past after having an axe?
00:27:16
Speaker
yeah yeah you have enough of your own shit sometimes right i don't know like but you can sit you can blame other factors in your life and you can blame this guy you can blame the daddy you can blame all this but i just had to really sit down with me and ask with myself was i doing everything in my power that i could to make myself feel good or was i playing the victim maybe i was sometimes i think i just got really sick of my own shit that's whenever the growth started happening like i do you think growth happens whenever you are like ah in the gutter, you know what I mean? Did you go to therapy to help you deal with your your strong emotions and and how to channel them better? Or is this something that you actually just learned through experience?
Therapy and Personal Development
00:27:53
Speaker
So I kind of, I thought I'd done a lot of self, like only self-help stuff. I started digging into personal development stuff. And I know it's massive now, right? I started this maybe, I came back from Australia in 2000 and
00:28:06
Speaker
I'd say 2018, right? What are we on now? 2025. So, seven years ago, I started my personal development journey and I never knew anything about this. Like, I'd never heard of it before, no, like, but it was, I actually started, it was, you know, remember Phil Graham, he done, what did you call it? One of his courses anyway. I jumped on his when I came back from Australia.
00:28:26
Speaker
seven years ago and the very first topic that we done was personal development and it was like it's stuff that made me think differently than I've ever ever thought before um yeah and if you just start one end of the healing journey without even realising it and I learned to kind of love myself I read books, i read self-development books. I just came became really, really focused on that. So there was a lot of self-help done before and I had even looked at a therapist. I found it amazing. Have you ever heard of tapping therapy? Of what type of therapy? Tapping. Tapping, yes, actually, yeah. Like that's big time changed my life. Like borderline changed my life. Big time yet because it just made me realize that everything is an emotion. Like so every single thing I feel now, like if I felt
00:29:11
Speaker
a big emotion here now. That's not the first time that I felt that emotion. Do you know what I mean? like that That's same. We only have certain emotions. So if I feel like really, really sad now, like a hurt, it's because you can relate that stuff you can relate to that emotion. That emotion has happened before in your life. So like whenever I feel really bad about myself, like I know not to blame myself anymore.
00:29:32
Speaker
like And I know that i can go I can go and speak to the girl and tell her this emotion has come up today. I went and go and see her for loads of things that happened in my life. like For fra instance, I'll just be raw with you. There was times where I was like maybe biting at Max. like shut like i didn't want I wasn't the calm, cool parent that I wanted to be.
00:29:49
Speaker
i was reacting like i was getting like the feeling triggered whenever he was going on at me and i felt like i couldn't cope with it i was getting overwhelmed when i was shouting at him so i went and spoke to her about that and she's able to take me back to a time in my life when i was a kid and this was happening do you know what i mean and then you you tap over the emotion and you kind of release that emotion it's it's it's amazing like it's literally and i can do that by myself as well so if i'm sitting by myself and i feel sad or when i feel anything if something's coming over with me i'll just sit and tap myself and the emotion then leaves. And is the tapping to do with like the chakras and the energy centers and is is it kind of to release the energy from the body? Is that the the idea? Yes, because it's all, it's all, where it's all stored, isn't it? Like i guess energy, yeah. And see, you don't, I've done a lot of breath work as well, I think. I've done the breath work maybe two years ago and that was the first time that I realised how much you hold in your actual body. Like when I was releasing
00:30:44
Speaker
like I was a racingist like I was like doing a claw hand with my hands I was always nearly foaming at the mouth I was getting pain over my body where it was just it like the trauma was just releasing through it like it was it's amazing it's so I'm so I love it like You know, what I love so much about this podcast is that the different people that I get to speak to with that, you know, have different ways of dealing with different traumas or different, you know, people who've got different practices. You know, I've spoken to people about Reiki, about active breath work, about yoga, about tapping about, you know, like loads of cognitive behavioral therapy. And at the end of the day, what I'm really learning is it's the same
00:31:27
Speaker
stuff in different forms. yeah and like It's amazing because they we're reaching so many more people and everyone will find what works for them to be able to release that trauma in their body, to be able to to work through emotions. And what you said there about like emotions being something that we've experienced in the past, like it's so true. like if So if I feel a certain way ah and what I need to do is be like, why do I feel this way? What am I thinking or what has happened? to make me feel that way. So it's either something external that's happened. There's someone has said to you or something like that, or it's something that you're thinking, but either way, it's your perception of the situation, or but your perception is only ever from your past experiences. And a lot of it we've blocked out. It's in the subconscious mind. And it's like, I've learned so much about this and you're saying you're doing this with it, you know, and tapping therapy. I have done so much of this.
00:32:20
Speaker
through what's it called, cognitive hypno hypnotherapy and neurolinguistic programming of through TMP with Kieran O'Neill and my coach Charlotte Melky, like absolutely amazing. So like, you know, any of my limiting beliefs are things holding me back. Like we dive into, like we do this kind of meditation thing and I dive into my past and like these random things will come to me. yeah And I'm like, you know, we were, to myself and my coach were doing something about, I can't remember something that was, hope that was bothering me at the time. And it went back to this moment. And I was like, when I was in my like second year of primary school, so senior infants is what it's called, dent so but I moved schools. So I was like five years old and I moved schools. I didn't think that was a big deal. Like I did one year in one school and then I moved to a new school. And it came back to me, like me sitting in that classroom feeling like I didn't belong. And it was so traumatic to me.
00:33:11
Speaker
I didn't even ah hers because i know I didn't know the house how significant that was to me about how, you know, feeling not good enough or feeling like I didn't belong or feeling that I wasn't being heard or seen.
00:33:31
Speaker
yeah Isn't it crazy though? Some of the things that pop up, you're like, sure that's not important. It's not necessarily something that has to be massive. like We always think it has to be something really bad that's happened to us back in the day, but it's actually wee small things that just give you those beliefs, isn't it? Yeah. And I think it's really empowering to hear that you manage to navigate your own way through, you know, an eating disorder through, you know, postpartum, navigating your way as a new mother. Like these are really serious life struggles, you know, and obviously anyone listening who is, you know, who thinks they might have an eating disorder, do go and talk to someone. There's better services out there now. It's really, really empowering to know that, you know, if you're struggling with something,
00:34:12
Speaker
they're like personal development it like I love personal development I'm the same as you probably about seven years ago I started getting into it I read a book the first book I ever read in relation to this was the success principles by Jack Canfield have you read this no not yet God, I haven't read it since, i read it but I could change my life. And so basically it's these principles to become really, really successful. And ba basically he's like, if this book doesn't change your life, email me. But like that book did change my life. That was obviously the seed that I planted, but the very first principle that he said, which you made me think of this when you said this, the first principle of this book is take 100% responsibility for your own life. He's like,
00:34:54
Speaker
That is the most important thing. So complaining, he's like complaining is the most useless activity that you can do. It's actually a form of self-harm. Stop complaining. yeah Stop blaming. Look at your situation. Stop living in the past. You're here now. What can you do to move forward from here? And you take responsibility. It's not your parents' fault. It's not the system's fault. It's not the government's fault. No one's coming to save you, like,
00:35:20
Speaker
Yeah, it is what it is. Literally, it is what it is. What's happened has happened. The system is the system. You're here. What are you going to do moving forward? Yeah. How can you make it better for you? Because crying about it doesn't help. It doesn't help. It doesn't help it move forward. And it sounds really harsh. Sometimes you can't really speak like this to people, but you could speak like this to yourself. like If you realize it, I just knew, right, what am I doing here? It's me. like There was things happening in my life and I think there was a common denominator here. Like, you know what I mean? You have to look within. Sometimes you can't blame everybody else. And the more books you read, the more you realize, like what I'm saying, the more people I talk to, I realize it's the same message and the same method in different ways.
00:36:02
Speaker
It's the same message that's coming up, the stuff that keeps recurring in books. Like I'm currently reading Napoleon Hill, Think and Grow Rich. And the stuff that he's talking about, that book was written in the 1930s. It's still relevant today. And I've heard it in so many other books and so many other processes. It's just different information. And so the stuff that really repeats, I'm like, this is really important.
Maintaining a Healthy Lifestyle and Routine
00:36:24
Speaker
I think it's really important as well for us to kind of note here that although we're being you know tough on ourselves and we're like, okay, what am I going to do?
00:36:32
Speaker
It's also that it's not beating yourself up. It's important to feel your emotions, but to question them as well. Okay. I feel this way. Sit with them. I think we're so afraid to get uncomfortable. And it can be, read especially if we have a lot of trauma, it can be really uncomfortable and we might need the help of a therapist with that discomfort. But if we're eating to numb emotion, if we're drinking to numb emotion, if we're doing drugs to numb emotion, whatever it is, overworking, whatever, you know, over exercising, you know,
00:36:58
Speaker
Yeah, restricting food. If we're doing something that makes us feel better from something inside us, we have to learn to sit with that feeling. And it's so like, it is, you know, yourself, like, at the start, and they speak, you want to just run away because you just have that feeling inside you and it make the urge like,
00:37:16
Speaker
even like still for me now, like when Max goes to his dollies on a Saturday night and I'm going right, I could easily open a bottle of wine here, run out to drink with my friends and whatever. But I know that there's still so much work to do. I know that there's so much work to do inside. So I'll sit and I'll grin and I'll bear it. And the feeling, like see if you give it a 10 emotion arises. See you after 20, 30 minutes.
00:37:37
Speaker
I'm just sitting with it. It just goes away. Or if you have the coping mechanisms in place, too, if you know that that emotion's coming up, if you know, like you could go a walk, whatever. Yeah. Replace the coping mechanism. Exactly. So like we talked about this with like creating a gap. You know, if you have, like, you know, you have this habit of like, you know, you have the strungers where you want to eat all the biscuits in the press. It's like, you're not saying you can't, you're just creating that gap. And you're like, before I do, I'm going to go take a shower.
00:38:05
Speaker
Before I do, I'm going to go out for a walk for half an hour, try and create about 30 minute gap. And it becomes more of a choice than as an automatic reaction. You have to, and then that you might, even if you still do, at least you've created that gap, you're less likely. I just think that, that really, really does help. And it teaches you and trains you to work through the emotion. And like, when I, even when I think back to my cognitive behavioral therapy back in the day with, with anxiety, like one of the first things, like you said, those little tasks to give you, she was like, next time the panic attack comes.
00:38:34
Speaker
stop trying to run away from it. Cause I was in this cycle of being afraid of panic attacks, which was bringing on panic attacks. And it was like happening, ah happening every day. And it was affecting my whole life. Like I couldn't walk down the town because I was like, I've nowhere to see it when I have my panic attack. I've nowhere, like I'll make an absolute show. It was awful. It was so bad. And.
00:38:51
Speaker
She was like, I want you to go to a shopping center, let the pan panic attack come on and see what's the worst that that that's going to happen. You're not going to, she gave me a book that i I could read to understand panic attacks. And once I understood that I couldn't die from it, that would, that took one fear away straight away. And then I learned to just like, she was like, I want you to literally be like, bring it on. and letting It runs through my body. And the funny thing is, although it feels like your whole world is crashing down, like I'd be completely out of my body. Nobody around me would notice.
00:39:21
Speaker
Except for Dave, like Dave knew he's like, oh, are you okay? But everyone else, like, I could have been having a panic attack around my parents at times and they wouldn't have noticed unless I was like, oh my God, I need to sit down. Just let it surge through me within a few minutes. It's gone. Right. I think I've only ever took one in my life and it was on holiday one day, but like, what does that like feel? Is that, is that not really scary for you? Like, I don't know if it was really, really scary, but I think as I understood it more and the more experience I had of it, the less it took a long time to do that. At the time as well, I was working with my doctor, like I was on antidepressants to help bring my serotonin levels up, to help the physical trigger of the of the panic attacks. So that was, you know, very much at the time I was, but like a panic attack for me would come on. I just, I would suddenly just be who out of body. Like I'd feel like I was going to faint.
00:40:06
Speaker
But like it's just everything becomes unreal. And then like my heart would start to race. My chest would start to tighten. So initially, when I first started having panic attacks, I used to think I was going to die. I thought I was having like a heart attack or like some sort of like pulmonary thing going on. But it was just really, really scary. like you know like Driving was a huge issue for me as well. like And you know obviously, I had to work as well at the time. I was a teacher at the time. So that was you know it was just constant. You feel like you can't breathe?
00:40:36
Speaker
Yeah. And I used to feel very sometimes like just disconnected from myself. Like it was like, I can't really describe it. Like sometimes like, yeah, I just felt like I didn't trust myself. Oh my God. That's nice st i very nice. Yeah. I've been like, I have, you know, I- Your own body, like you don't trust your own body. I don't trust my own body and I don't trust my own mind.
00:40:56
Speaker
which is a really, really scary place to be. So this is why personal development is so huge to me. This is why yoga is so important to me, why fitness is so important to me, health, because it's actually reconnected me with me, which has now led to this whole new career that I'm in. And, you know, but that's how strong and it is in me. And that's how important it is for me to help people with their health and fitness, because it's so, it's always so much more than that.
00:41:19
Speaker
Yeah, it is. there There's a big background, isn't there? Even you just said there about yoga. I never could get into yoga before, right? But I know why, because my mind was insane. And I see busy yeah and they couldn't have a still mind. I couldn't be with my own thoughts. But now, yoga is my favourite. Hot yoga, I do hot yoga every week. It's my favourite thing to do, ever, because I can now actually finally, after all the years of fighting with myself, I can find stillness in my own head, which is amazing for me, really, really good for me. I recommend like yoga is so good. I think stillness in your own head is the most important thing that you can get in life. Like I actually think, you know, money
00:42:00
Speaker
health like everything in you know that the world has to offer you know or all these goals that people have if you have peace of mind and you can connect with yourself you can do anything it's the most important thing but that this is what you can get through like i i was out for a walk before this podcast i love walking by myself by the sea and i i've sometimes i just i look like a crazy person like could we can do quite deep for And I'm connecting with nature, connecting with myself. I will never listen to a podcast or anything while I'm walking. Cause for me, that's my connection with nature and with myself. Like yoga, I do yoga twice a week as well. Very much. I just think, you know, when you put these little habits in place where you have time to connect with yourself, my training as well. Like for other people, training can be a really great way to connect. Now I tend to listen to an audio book while I'm training as well. It depends on the mood, but you know, in general, I will listen to something when training, but like when I'm, and most people do it the opposite way. They listen to music when they're training. And well, but I think it's about finding what actually connects you with you. I find sometimes when I'm strength training, I'll get a little bit competitive with myself and it's not necessarily a positive thing. So I find learning while training for me works well because it keeps me, you know, keep the, I get a bit more in my own head when I'm training.
00:43:12
Speaker
Compared to like, if I'm walking, I'm just at one with nature and myself and it's, you know, it's, you know, it's a, I do sometimes I'm not a regular meditator and I think that's probably my, yeah, my busy lifestyle. So I will always have a little meditation at the end of my, so I would twice a week after yoga, but I would very much, I view my walks as a form of meditation for me because I find it. I can actually connect easier to myself when I'm moving or what I'll do is like I live near the sea I'll walk from my house I'm about 10 minutes down to the beach I'll walk down to the beach I'll walk along the beach and there's a lovely quiet part in it and I will sit down and after that walk once I have my blood flowing and I sit down at the sea I'll take a few minutes there by myself and I'll meditate there I'll just kind of just just really do some breathing
00:44:01
Speaker
that's what works for me and that's what I find after a yoga class because I've moved my body and the and the energy is moving through I find it easier to connect with myself whereas in the evening time if I'm like oh lie down I need to meditate I find that hard and as well because it's like oh get this kid to bed oh now I need to go to bed oh I need to read my book I need to do my journaling you know it's it's yeah and yeah kind of made like a promise to myself that I was going to meditate every morning before. So the reason being up for this as well is when i'm um the mornings were mental in my house, me, Max, the puppy, it was just chaos, right? And I was like, right, they're obviously feeding off me. I'm waking up and I'm a live wire. Like, I'm not ready to deal with anybody in a peaceful manner. So I made a promise to myself, 2025, before I get out of bed, I'm going to meditate. But it's only 10 minutes. Like, it's only 10 minutes, my morning. but
00:44:52
Speaker
I'll not get out, I'll not approach max until I've done missed this, listen to 10 minutes and it's actually really, really changed our higher morning school because I'm not pieced with myself. I'm not looking through on social media. I'm not feeling triggered. I'll keep my phone away, like social media side away. I'm just with me and we're breathing and then I'll go in and then I'll wake up max and he gets a happier moment. I just noticed how I was in the morning. I was like, that can't be good. Like he's, even if I hadn't even spoke yet, he's very young. He's probably waiting for a live wire moment to come like do this. You know what I mean? I was like, yeah, I don't want my lifetime.
00:45:27
Speaker
more peace in my mornings. I want more peace in my life and it's worked, of and it's worked a treat, like, even for the pub. Yeah. I probably need to to put a bit of that back into my mornings, but what I, what I use my mornings for now is I get up on a, on a good morning, most mornings I'll get up about half five, um, because I really value that time before my kids get up at like half seven or whatever. I'd be like, you know, two hours there.
00:45:51
Speaker
where I actually try and get a lot of my creative work done, you know, like I'll like script my content. And, you know, if I've got any talks coming up or, you know, like work on podcasts or, you know, like ah whatever I'm creating, I will do that at that time. Now that you've you've reminded me, I used to sit and do like a little bit of a breathing exercise before that to kind of wake me up. And I kind of, that ah has kind of gone by the wayside. So that's something I need to bring back in, but I just. want Like things come in and out, you're going, I used to do that. Oh my God. But yeah, no, I, at the minute where I'm at, because it's so busy, I like getting my three kids out the door in the morning. I use that time to get ahead of myself, you know, and I send my morning message to my clients and you know, just make, have a look at my day ahead so that I kind of know where I'm at. So like, but for the same reason that you're saying so that I'm calm and then I'm ready for the kids. I had a talk later in the evening yesterday, so I didn't get up early this morning. So I do feel a little bit like I'm chasing myself today, but sometimes you do have to prioritize sleep as well, but it's so worth, but it gets me out of bed. I used to really struggle with the early mornings, but even now, you know, if I press snooze and then it'll go again at 20 to five or 20 to six instead of half five, I used to like be like, oh, fucking, I'll just stay in bed till seven. Whereas now I'm like, Oh no, I need to get up. I need to cut because I, I'm going to feel better that I'm organized. And I'll have my little coffee by myself. Like it's like a little ritual. I have my Nespresso machine and I'm like, I'll have my water and stuff for the first half hour. And then I'll get up and I'll make my little coffee and I just, and I love it. And there's no one talking to me and it's just amazing.
Balancing Life, Work, and Personal Goals
00:47:23
Speaker
eats Me and my coffee. Yeah.
00:47:25
Speaker
It's mad how much more you become, you just become more disciplined by the week. Well, I see myself becoming more disciplined by the week. Like there's times I would have, I was like, you're saying I hit the snooze button and like, how do we doze? And I was like, and then I would have felt, I didn't understand why I would have felt like shit then the rest of the day. But now it's like, no matter what, if I don't want to do something, it's like, it's getting done.
00:47:45
Speaker
Like how's that like yeah I I maybe did, I thought it used to be dissonant, but I don't think I actually was as much as what I am now. It's like I get a lot of more shit done now. And I think as well with discipline, I think people like it's a misconception as well, where it's like, Oh, you have to do something you really don't want to do all the time because that's discipline. And you know, whereas it's actually, you're doing something that you might not feel like doing in the moment because you know, it's going to make you feel better or you know, it's for the greater goal. Doing it in the moment when you don't feel like it is not doing something that you hate over and over again. It's doing something that, you know, that you do want, even when you don't feel like it at the time.
00:48:25
Speaker
not everybody needs to get up at half five in the morning. I had this conversation with Katrina Kerwin and she was like, I just, I can't get up that early. And I find that my brain works better at nighttime. And I'm like, well, why don't you just stay, like, she doesn't have kids. I was like, stay in bed. You don't have to get up at half five in the morning. Work in the evenings if you work better. Like Kieran O'Neill from TMP, he, I don't know what's he talking about on this podcast or not, but he doesn't start his workday till like 2pm.
00:48:51
Speaker
ah he He doesn't get out of bed till 10 a.m. And he again, he doesn't have children. So, you know, people get the who don't have kids can do these things. But, you know, his ADHD, he finds that he works much better at nighttime. So he'll actually quite often work till midnight.
00:49:06
Speaker
and He'll get up in the morning, he'll do his his training and you know get all his his personal stuff done first. And then he works from 2pm. As we're talking about morning routines, obviously as mothers, fathers, whoever is listening to this, that you know we don't have as much choice as that. But just because someone like me is talking about my half five in the morning, morning routine, or you're talking about your meditation, it's not something that you have to do.
00:49:28
Speaker
But it's definitely something to worth trying and finding what works in your routine to give you that little space for you before you start giving everything to everyone else. Yeah. A hundred percent. Yeah. So before I'm just actually conscious, I'm like, we've nearly spoken an hour about all of this, which has been amazing. But let's just finish the podcast on a little bit about what training means, means to you now, because I know, you know, you obviously you are very much into strength training, but you're saying you're, you're now training for a triathlon and. who That's so exciting but I'd love to hear in your your mindset towards exercise now and what it does for you to empower you. I always say that exercise should be compulsory because I don't know how anybody gets through their wake without doing it. Not stating anybody that doesn't do it but I mean once you realise the benefits of it like
00:50:15
Speaker
When you do it all the time, I guess you would never see your life without it. I've always, I kind of always was into sports and school, I always played sports. And then when I started at the gym when I was 16, 17, I've always just kind of strengthened, but lifting weights, building muscle, all that kind of more valuable than say, but there's always being an athlete and me left and me like that used to be there. So I used to play sport and school and university and stuff. So I think I got there this year and I'm like, I'm sick of not actually like not winning things, but you know, like I could push myself way harder than what I'm actually doing because you don't really know what you're capable of until you try. ah I've never really swam properly before and or done the bike and stuff like that. Like I've obviously done the odd roads and stuff. So I was like, I'm going to do a triathlon and swim and sing all the hardest things that I've ever, ever done. But it makes me like, I'm, I'm 32 years old and I found a sport at this age.
00:51:03
Speaker
that like makes me feel the best that I've ever felt, you know what I mean? So I took me to this age to find something where I belong. like I belong in that water. like it does It's so hard before I go in there. like I'm like, oh, no, I have to go and swim again. It's dreading every time. But after, how I feel it's just...
00:51:21
Speaker
Like, it's amazing. So, like I think it's really important to exercise. is It's so beneficial for you, but I think it's more important to find something that you love doing. If you don't love doing something, like you'll not stick at it. You don't have to to go and lift weights like I really sell music. like You don't have to go to the gym. You actually don't have to. Do whatever they are if you want to enjoy it. And you'll keep doing it. You'll stay consistent with it.
00:51:45
Speaker
what you enjoy, you're gonna keep up and that's what's most important. So if you've tried something and it hasn't worked or you don't like it or it feels like it's sure, try something else and just get out there and you know try different classes, try different approaches. you know like There's dancing, there's aerobics, there's swimming, there's you know lifting weights, there's homework outs, there's running, there's like there's so much out there that you can do. And what I think is so important as well, and this is something that I learned through CrossFit is Celebrating what, like exercising for what to show yourself what your body can do and what your mind can do when you stop doubting yourself is far more.
00:52:26
Speaker
far more powerful than exercising because you want to lose weight or lose you want to lose a certain weight. There's no why there, like, you know, there's no real reason to do it. but And like, unless you're, you're into bodybuilding or, you know, you're doing a photo shoot or something and you are like, and you can have little short term goals like photo shoot or whatever, you know, but in general, you know, and it is great to be like, and I do enjoy, I really enjoy strength training. I mean, like, I like that I'm, you know, building muscle that I'm getting stronger that, you know, that I'm setting myself up for as I get older. Like I really do.
00:52:55
Speaker
but like ah quite quite That does make me feel empowered, but I've started recently started running again and and I'm literally just at like 5k, but like that like that's how unfit I had got this past year because I suppose everything was so busy with the business. I did let my own fitness kind of slip away a little bit. yeah that I went, I did the couch to 5k, brought myself back up there. I'm running 5k now, twice a week.
00:53:18
Speaker
It's just reminded me of that, that feeling of pushing yourself when you've, when you don't think you can do it. And then you're like, oh my God, I just did it. We like doing hard things. Like we like challenging ourselves. So like, you know what I mean? We're going always, well, I personally, I love doing things that are really hard for me. Like the hot yoga and like rolling the swimming, like the hot yoga is like 40 degree room heat. Like it's sickening. But I mean, now I've done it that long where it's, I'm actually, I find it easy. Do you know what I mean? Like, so with the swimming too, it's like,
00:53:47
Speaker
So hard to do, but that makes me want to be really good at it. Noticing yourself getting stronger and better at something is amazing as well. You're like, oh, it is all paying off those days when I didn't feel like doing it. And it probably wasn't my best performance. And then you just keep showing up for yourself. And then all of a sudden you look back and you're like, wow, I just did it.
00:54:05
Speaker
Yeah. So we're just at the minute at then but myself and some of my clients we're doing, we're signed up to the women's mini marathon in Dublin. So it's ah that's the first of June. It's 10 K like, so it it's a nice 10, but that's a nice little running goal for me. 10 K because we over here like I enjoy running, but I also don't want to give it that much time. I don't want to be out for a lot. Like I don't want to run a marathon. I don't want to be out running long, having a little kind of performance goal of going running 10 K with my ladies. You know, I'm really looking forward to that. It's a nice little,
00:54:34
Speaker
Well, that's amazing. I'm here, i so i have I haven't ran as much as what I should have this year, so I really need that. And I'm watching people, all I see on Instagram is people rolling. I'm like, shit, I need to get on those roads. So like, I prioritize swimming because like, I have i can drown and die.
00:54:50
Speaker
and yes that It's an important one. It's definitely one to take off first, I'd say. yeah but If you're slow at rolling, you're slow at rolling. cycling, you're all right. But if you can't swim, you're going to go down. so no It's very, very, very true. So when is the triathlon? It only opened up on the first defibrillator. I haven't picked one yet, but I'm thinking of me in Cork.
00:55:14
Speaker
Amazing. I'll be watching that space now to see how you're getting on. That's amazing. Okay, that's good. Last question before we finish up. What does the word health mean to you? What does the word health mean to you? If you're healthy, then you're doing something that you love every day.
Defining Health and Podcast Closure
00:55:30
Speaker
Like you could say like eating healthy foods. You can fill your body with nutritious foods and go into the gym. But what does the word health mean to me? It's a tough one, isn't it? I ask everyone this, and I find it fascinating because everyone has different kind of perspective on it. I think it's okay to label things what healthy is, but I mean, it's individual. It's personal preference. If you're happy every day, if you wake up and do things that's generating you, then you have your health. Your health could be, I think a lot of it comes from how you're feeling. Do you know what I mean? A lot of it comes from how you actually feel inside.
00:56:02
Speaker
You're healthy. If you're, if you can see what you have in front of you, like people don't, I don't think people realize what is right there in front of them. Do you know what I mean? If you have enough, you have enough as it is. Yeah, I couldn't agree more. And I think when we're happy and we're grateful, we tend to do things to keep ourselves happy and grateful and healthy. It happens more naturally rather than forcing things. Yeah.
00:56:25
Speaker
Emma, thank you so much for coming on the podcast. This has been such an amazing conversation. Yeah, I absolutely loved it. You know, I mean, that's the first time I've ever went in depth about making this sort of stuff. So thank you so much. I hope that it helps so many women out there who are suffering with it. Thank you so much for sharing because I know it's not an easy conversation for you to have, but I do really think that you're going to help so many people by talk. And I know you're starting to talk more about it on your social media as well. So thank you for sharing because it I think it really will make a difference.
00:56:52
Speaker
and anyone who would like to follow you and, you know, see how you get on training for your triathlon and any more you talk about your past struggles. Where is is Instagram the best place to reach you? um Yes, Instagram, it's just m-a-k-e-p-t on the Instagram. Perfect. Thanks so much Emma. Thank you.
00:57:13
Speaker
I just want to say thank you so much for listening to the podcast. It really means so much to me that there are people out there actually listening to what I have to say and to the conversations that I'm having with others. So thank you so much. If you are enjoying the podcast, could you please make sure that you are subscribed? And if not, if you could hit that subscribe button, it really does make that much of a difference. Also, if you would like to leave a review on any of the episodes that you listen to that you particularly enjoy, I would love to hear what you have to say. And also, if there's an episode that you've enjoyed, please do share it on your social media, in your WhatsApp groups, with your friends. If you're sharing it on your stories, please tag myself in it and whoever I'm interviewing. This it would be greatly appreciated.
00:57:55
Speaker
Also, if you're interested in working with me and my wonderful team, please do contact me about applying for coaching. So you can contact me at Kate Hamilton health at gmail dot.com or on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, all Kate Hamilton health, and you will be able to apply for coaching. We can organize to have a chat and see if it's a good fit for you and get you moving towards your goals.