Transcript
Speaker: Hey mama, i need to tell you something that might sting a little bit, but I promise you it's going to set you free. So if you're watching this and you've been telling yourself, I'll start my business when the kids are older, or i need to wait until I have more time, or even the dreaded, I'm not qualified enough yet.
Speaker: I'm about to call you out with love. Because here's what I know, after working with hundreds of women, you're not stuck because you don't have time, money, or qualifications. You are stuck because you're believing three very, very specific lies that are keeping you small. And today, I'm going to expose every single one of them and give you the truth that you will finally that will finally set you free to step into the leader and entrepreneur that you were born to be.
Speaker: so Welcome back to Mamas Who Lead. I'm Laura Carrafino, Momify military spouse, and I'm a founder of a seven-figure business built on faith, grit, and absolute conviction that you don't have to choose between being an incredible mom and building something meaningful.
Speaker: So if you're new here today, this show is for purpose-driven women who know they're made for more. We don't do cookie-cutter business advice or hustle culture here. We talk about building businesses that align with your values, create lasting impact, and give you the freedom to lead both at home and in the world.
Speaker: Welcome. And today going to start with lie number one. And this is the biggest lie. i don't have enough time. You and I have the same 24 hours as every other successful woman entrepreneur out there.
Speaker: The same 24 hours any successful entrepreneur has. We all have the same 24 hour span. The only difference isn't time.
Speaker: its priorities and systems. I know I've talked on other episodes about systems and how key that is. So if you you want to go back and um listen to those episodes, I highly recommend it.
Speaker: But I promise you, I used to believe this lie as well. You know, with five kids, military spouse lifestyle, um I convinced myself I needed to wait for the perfect time to start my business. But here's what I discovered. There's no perfect time. There's only right now.
Speaker: And we're not getting any younger. And, you know, time is slipping by from us. And we need to focus on right now because you will never be as young as you are, capable as you are than you are right now.
Speaker: And the truth is, you don't need more time. You just need better boundaries and clearer priorities. I know it's harsh, right? But when I finally got serious about my business, I didn't magically just find extra hours on my day. It took it took a lot of work, actually, you know, I started saying no to things that didn't align with my mission.
Speaker: And I stopped scrolling on social media for hours. I know, and I do that now. Like, I know I've also talked about, you know, taking a break. And there was times that, you know, I needed ah mental health break. You know, there's certain things I had to, you know, stop doing. i had to stop, so you know, so a lot of social media can be intense right now, especially in today's world.
Speaker: And back when I started my business, social media didn't didn't really exist. i mean, We had Yahoo groups back when I started. I don't know if you guys are familiar with that, but that also would take my attention span. And then when Pinterest came into the picture, I could scroll Pinterest all day long.
Speaker: like just looking at different things and recipes and kind of like the TikTok today, if you will, but um in Pinterest, I still could get lost on there, but I have to be mindful and be you know very mindful of my and that my time and how I use it.
Speaker: So stopping scrolling on social media for hours because people to do that. I am guilty of that. And it wasn't until I started tracking how long I was on there that it was like a wake up call, like, what am I doing?
Speaker: It's a time suck. And so i stopped doing that, you know, set boundaries on that. There's apps you can download that can make sure you're sticking to those times. Or you can even, if you don't want to do that, you can put an alarm on your phone that reminds you when, like, okay, that's it. That's the all I have. i have to go focus on something else.
Speaker: I also started waking up 30 minutes earlier. And I know sometimes that can be hard, especially if you have littles that aren't sleeping during the night. But I promise you, if you start doing that and get into a habit, I started, it was challenging at first, you know, but as my body got used to it, I just wake up even without an alarm. I don't know about you, but i I am so stressed when it comes to like alarms. like it to I don't know if it triggers me and I have like a panic attack and that's like the worst way to wake up. like I do not want to wake up with an alarm.
Speaker: So now I've trained my body and I just wake up at that time. um i wake up about 5, 5.30 every single morning and i can get the stuff done that I need to do. It gives me my me time before...
Speaker: the chaos of the kids that wake up about 6.30 usually. And when my kids used to take naps, I used nap time very differently too. So and whether it was doing the house stuff that I needed to do the laundry, the cleanup while the kids were napping, or I worked on my business.
Speaker: At a time when I first started doing I mean, this is back in, I started working online and from home around 2007 because transitioned. moved, because i transitioned we moved across um across the United States for my husband's career. And my career just didn't transfer. There just was not any positions open for me that was in remotely comparable to what I used to do. And within driving distance, that was another factor. I had to have a close commute time and just where we lived um based on
Speaker: the possibility of jobs were too far away. So I had to stay home. So I looked for something to do from home. And as I've shared in the past, ah direct sales was that solution for me at the time.
Speaker: And don't knock on this, ladies, if you're listening and thinking, you know, um you're like anti-MLM, anti-direct sales, don't be, because that literally, it went, direct sales helped us put food on the table at the time because we my so my husband was just a very young lieutenant at the time.
Speaker: We had three small kids and one income. And those little parties I was doing, to selling jewelry at the time was um I didn't own the company, you know, I didn't have to pay for manufacturing. i did not have to pay for for shipping products to customers.
Speaker: um You know, I didn't have to, you know, source the materials. I didn't have to pay for it in that, you know, in a normal, business that if you're starting up a business and you're manufacturing the products yourself and you're doing all of that overhead. I didn't have that.
Speaker: That was the real benefit of having this ready-made business in a box with this jewelry company that i partnered with. And That was really life-changing for us. You know, it got too enough to where, you know, I was able and it was fun for me. And so I was using that and doing I would do, you know, I have people come over with their kids when the kids were, you know, we'd have parties at nap time They would come over and socialize the kids with play and then they would go all go down for naps and we would all would, you know, socialize, which, you know, it was getting kind of like ah a win-win doing business at nap time socializing too. So it was a great use of time and it's kind of, i've kind of strayed off topic there for a second, but that was how I was using my time.
Speaker: And so if you use your time wisely, it, you can do so much more. So my act, your action step for this week is track your time for three days consistently, I guarantee you're going to find at least five to seven hours.
Speaker: All right, five to seven hours that you're currently spending on activities that aren't moving you towards your goals. And that's the key, you want to be staying focused and moving towards your goals, right?
Speaker: All right. Now, lie number two, two, two, is I'm not qualified enough. Oh my gosh. I, you know, this, this second lie is the qualification trap.
Speaker: And it is, you know, it's where you're saying i need more certifications. I need more experience, more credentials before I can stop. Just stop it. Just stop it right there. So let me tell you,
Speaker: Your life experience is your qualification, your struggles, your victories, your journey as a mom, as a woman of faith, as someone who's figured things out the hard way.
Speaker: Those are not disqualifications. Those are not disqualifying you. That's exactly what qualifies you. You know, I started my business. I didn't have any experience in business.
Speaker: Absolutely none. didn't know what I was doing. I did a lot wrong in the beginning. I like to say I failed forward. um you know I was a Department of Defense contractor. I worked for the government. hey um I had top-secret security clearance. I worked in a skiff. you know And ah that had nothing to do with what I was i ended up doing with um direct sales and um selling jewelry, right?
Speaker: And there was no formal business training whatsoever, you know, but I had to experience it. But what I, you know, all I had was my experience from doing things within, um you know, my background, my positions, um my passion, and my deep understanding of problems that I was solving, right? Right.
Speaker: um And that's enough. That's enough. You know, and I had to have that desire to really want it too. So the truth is your audience doesn't need you to be perfect.
Speaker: They just need you to be real, authentic, and just one step ahead of where they are. Literally just one step ahead. So think about it. well Who would you rather learn from? The person that all the degrees who's never walked your path,
Speaker: Or the mom who's been exactly where you are and has figured out how to create the life you want. Someone who may have the education, but they don't have the experience and knowledge and understanding ah where you're at.
Speaker: Or someone who may not have the degrees, but has figured it all out and has the understanding and is a mom too. i would want that. I kind of had to figure it out on my own. Like I would have loved to have that person.
Speaker: I eventually over the years, I working, I started paying for coaches. to figure, you know, help me. I paid someone who knew just a little bit more than I did to get the stuff done. So take action this week. I want you to write down three problems that you've solved in your own life.
Speaker: Those problems, those are your business opportunities. Someone else is struggling with exactly what you've overcome. Lie number three, I should wait until my kids are older. Oh goodness, I've heard that.
Speaker: And this third lie is the timing trap. I should wait until my kids are older, more independent and out of the house. You know, I can give you the... Plus and bonus. I've had five kids and my kids age from currently five to 23. So have a very broad range of kids. And when I first started working for myself in business, I had three small children at home. I had three under the age of five.
Speaker: So it was chaos, chaos all the time. And mommy, your kids don't need a mom who's waiting for someday. They just need to a mom who's showing them what it looks like to pursue their calling right now.
Speaker: I mean, literally when I first started building my business, my youngest at the time was in diapers. Like he was a newborn, just literally a few months old.
Speaker: Um, was it easy? Nope. Not at all. But you know what happened? My kids got to watch their mom build something meaningful. And they've seen me over the years.
Speaker: You know, they learned that dreams don't have to wait for perfect circumstances. And I've taught them resilience because we've had I've had some ups and downs, of course, as all business do. who And you as I you know said early, fail forward. you know I don't always make the right choices, um but I figure it out. you know They're always guiding me to the direction I'm supposed to go.
Speaker: so And the truth is, your kids are not obstacles to your purpose. They are part of it. Building your business while raising them teaches them more about resilience, faith, and following God's calling than any lecture ever could.
Speaker: Plus, there's something nobody else talks about is starting your business now while your kids are young means you'll have the freedom and financial security to be present with them.
Speaker: when they're teenagers and they actually want to talk to you, right? And you'll have more time to spend with them, like going to their sporting activities. And is more purpose and more meaningful. And, you know, an action step I can ask you to take this week is to have a conversation with your kids about your dreams.
Speaker: You'll be amazed at how supportive and excited they are when they understand that mom has big goals too. You know, and you can also even get your children involved. So when I first started, um i started in the direct sales.
Speaker: So at the time i had a kindergartner and three-year-old and a newborn. And I had my five-year-old and three-year-old would help me put ah stickers on the back of my catalogs.
Speaker: They would help stuff little goodie bags. They would do fun things. And there's also, you know, you can also even set up, I'm not going go in the tax stuff too deep, but um talk to your accountant. As always, I'm not a financial advisor by any means, but um you can set up tax savings accounts.
Speaker: with your children if they're helping you with your business a and pay them, but talk to your accountant about that too. So get them involved and sharing your vision and dreams with your children opens that door to communications too for them. And it teaches them so much.
Speaker: So here's the real truth that's gonna set you free. You already have everything you need to start. You have experience.
Speaker: You have passion, you have problems you've solved already. You have a unique perspective that only you can offer. And the question isn't whether you're ready, it's whether you're willing to start before you feel ready.
Speaker: Every successful mom and entrepreneur that I know started messy. They started scared. They started with imperfect websites, basic social media, and more questions than answers, but they started. So here's what I want you to do right now.
Speaker: First stop, but waiting for permission. you need permission, I'm giving it to you right now, but you don't need anyone's approval to pursue the calling God has placed on your heart.
Speaker: And second, start small, but start today. Pick one thing, create an Instagram account. Write that first blog post. Reach out to that potential client. Just do it. Just do it.
Speaker: You know, the Nike sling saying, just do it. You know, just start. Okay. And third, if you're ready to stop believing these lies and start building the business that's been on your heart or the passion project or the foundation or pursue that dream, whatever it may be, i want and to invite you to check out my resources at lauracarafino.com. I've got some free tools specifically designed for purpose-driven moms who are ready to turn their passion into profit without sacrificing their values.
Speaker: And if you want to go deeper, join our exclusive community, The Leaders Lounge, where conversations can continue there, collaborations, And women rise together in there.
Speaker: so the link is in the show notes in the description. so go ahead and head over there. and Mama, you were made for more than just surviving. You were made to lead.
Speaker: were made to build and to create impact that extends ah far beyond your four walls. So stop believing the lies that keep you small and start believing the truth about who you are and what you're capable of.
Speaker: Your time is now your calling is real and the world needs what you have to offer. If this episode spoke to your heart by any means, please share it with another woman who needs to hear it today.
Speaker: And be sure to subscribe to our channel so that you never miss an episode. And remember, you're not just a mom, you are a leader. So until next time, keep leading, keep growing and keep believing in what is possible.
Speaker: You've been listening to Mamas Who Lead with Laura Carafino. Thank you for joining us on this journey today. Each episode, each story, and every piece of advice we share is a step towards building a community of empowered, resilient, and inspiring Mama leaders, just like you.
Speaker: Remember leadership isn't just about the title or the workplace. It's about how we navigate our lives, uplift those around us and pave the way for future generations. As we close today's episode, I encourage you to carry forward the insights and inspiration you've gained, apply them to your life, share them with your tribe and continue to lead with heart and purpose.
Speaker: For more empowering stories, strategies, and support, make sure you subscribe to Mamas Who Lead on your favorite podcast platform. And don't forget to follow us on social media for behind the scenes content, community discussions, and much more.
Speaker: Until we meet again, keep embracing your unique journey of leadership and motherhood. You are capable, you are powerful, and you are exactly where you're meant to be.
Speaker: Lead on Mamas.
