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Ep. 52: Surrender Over Hustle: Faith, Motherhood & Building a Business with Rachel Nelson
20 Plays1 month ago
You were never meant to hustle your way into your calling — you were made to surrender into it.
In this episode of Mommas Who LEAD, host Laura Caroffino sits down with coach, speaker, and author Rachel Nelson of Equipped Mommas for an honest, faith-filled conversation about raising the next generation and building a business — without losing yourself in the process. Rachel opens up about the season God stripped everything away, including a job loss from a false accusation, and how it moved her identity off her work and onto Christ. Together they unpack why "rhythm" beats "balance," how to tell when you've slipped from Spirit-led into hustle, and the lie of mom guilt that keeps so many women stuck.
If you're a first-time mom or a work-from-home entrepreneur carrying overwhelm, guilt, or comparison, consider this your permission slip to breathe, surrender, and trust that God has called you to both motherhood and business — in His strength, not your own.
In this episode:
- Rachel's testimony and the job loss that rebuilt her faith
- Why God is the ultimate provider — even when both she and her husband lost their jobs
- "Rhythm, not balance" as a sustainable way to hold motherhood and business
- How to recognize Spirit-led discipline versus hustle
- Guarding time in the Word in a loud, unpredictable season
- Finding godly community and learning to ask for help
- The truth for the mom buried in guilt
- What it really means to be "a Momma Who Leads"
About the guest: Rachel Nelson is a Holy Spirit–filled momma, coach, speaker, and author who equips first-time stay-at-home moms and entrepreneurs to rise above overwhelm and walk in confidence and clarity. She helps women embrace their calling to both motherhood and business — rooted in God's strength, not their own — without sacrificing their identity or intimacy with Him. With bold truth, biblical wisdom, and unwavering conviction, Rachel challenges moms to stop shrinking back and start walking fully in who God created them to be. A former D3 athlete and journalism graduate, she brings grit, discipline, and deep faith — reminding every mom she was never meant to do this alone.
🌿 Don't miss Rachel's FREE live masterclass — the Raised on Truth Mastermind — Tuesday, June 16th at 7:30 PM CST on Zoom, with guest coach Ken Kleinberg, all about confidently knowing what you're feeding your baby. Can't make it live? Grab the $17 VIP replay for lifetime access. To save your seat, email CoachRachelNelson@gmail.com.
Connect with Rachel:
- Instagram: @rachelfunnelson
- Website & 1:1 coaching: https://paperbell.me/rachel-nelson
- Podcast: This Is Me Attitude — her 140+ episode, 5-star-rated faith-based show
Connect with Laura & Mommas Who LEAD:
- Instagram: @LauraCaroffino
If this episode encouraged you, share it with a momma who needs to hear it. Keep leading, keep growing, and keep believing in what's possible.
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Transcript
Introduction and Purpose
00:00:02
Speaker
Welcome to Mamas Who Lead, podcast where the essence of motherhood meets the spirit of leadership.
Laura's Career Transition
00:00:08
Speaker
I'm Laura Carrafino, former Department of Defense contractor, now full-time network marketer, coach, and a mom to five incredible children.
00:00:17
Speaker
Alongside being a proud military spouse, I've journeyed through the highs and lows of transitioning from a structured career to building a flourishing business from the ground up, all while navigating the beautiful chaos of family life.
Inspiring Resilience and Leadership Stories
00:00:31
Speaker
In this podcast, we dive into the stories of women who exemplify resilience, leadership, and the unyielding power of motherhood. From insightful conversations with top income earners and network marketing to heart to heart discussions with leaders who are reshaping industries.
00:00:48
Speaker
Mamas Who Lead is here to inspire, educate, and empower you to weave leadership into the fabric of your everyday life. Whether you're at the beginning of your leadership journey or looking to pivot your career
Strategies and Challenges in Women's Leadership
00:00:59
Speaker
or seeking ways to balance your professional growth with family life, this is the place for you. Together, we'll explore the strategies, challenges, and triumphs of women who lead with purpose, passion, and a little bit of mom magic.
00:01:14
Speaker
So grab your headphones and let's embark on this journey together. Welcome to Mamas Who Lead.
Encouragement and Surrendering
00:01:22
Speaker
Welcome back to Mamasu Lead. And before we begin, I want to take one deep breath because this conversation is going to meet you right where you are. And maybe you're folding laundry, nursing a baby, or sitting in a pickup line wondering how on earth you're supposed to hold it all together. The home, the marriage, the business, the the calling, and your own walk with God. and that, if that is you today, consider this episode, your permission slip to stop striving and start surrendering. My guest living proof. You do not have to choose between your calling at home and the calling that God has placed on your life.
00:02:04
Speaker
My guest today is Rachel
Introduction of Guest: Rachel Nelson
00:02:06
Speaker
Nelson. and She is a Holy Spirit filled mama, coach, speaker, and author who equips first time stay at home moms and entrepreneurs to break free from overwhelm, guilt, and discouragement and step into unshakable confidence and clarity. I know you all need that, right? I know I did when I was a first time mama. So, and she brings the truth that God has called the The women to rise to the next generation and build kingdom impact through business. And here's what sets Rachel apart. And I really love it She doesn't just teach hustle.
00:02:44
Speaker
she She teaches surrender, obedience, and spirit-led discipline because the calling on your life was never meant to be carried in your own strength. And What is so unique about her is she's a former D3 collegiate athlete in journalism.
Surrender Over Hustle Philosophy
00:03:00
Speaker
She ah graduated with journalism and she brings real grit and deep faith and she hosts her own her own podcast show. It's called This Is Me Attitude Podcast and she's got over 140 episodes pointing women back to who God created them to be. So Rachel, welcome to Mama Sue Lead. I'm just so honored to have you here.
00:03:24
Speaker
Thank you so much for having me. And it gives me chills, honestly, of you just saying the bio. And I know that's something that I sent you before recording, but hearing it, I'm like, oh yeah, like that, that is what we're doing. God, like you're, you're leading me in this way. So I'm very excited to see what God has in store for us in this conversation. And thank you for having me.
00:03:43
Speaker
Same. I'm just so excited. So Rachel and I met through a mutual friend. um And my friend that introduced us, she's just so wonderful. And she just knows I want to interview and have incredible women that are doing amazing things, especially women of faith on the show. And she was like, Rachel's the girl. So um I'm just so thankful she introduced us. And Rachel's doing so many many, many amazing things. I should say like with coaching, she's a new mama and she has this amazing business.
Faith as Foundation
00:04:19
Speaker
And i want to take us back to the moment um about your faith and what, um how, take me to the moment your faith stopped being something you simply believed and became the foundation that you built your and entire life on.
00:04:37
Speaker
Oh, that is a good question. That makes me think because I'm like, okay, I want i want to make sure I say the right aspect. The first thing that well, the the foundation of it is when I fully accepted Jesus Christ. And that was in the middle of a big church service at our previous church.
00:05:00
Speaker
three summers ago now. So it's been somewhat recent, but if there's been a lot of life that's happened since then. And the scripture in Ezekiel that talks about the heartbreaking and feeling the new heart, that's not obviously word for word. So I very much recommend people to go back and read scripture. We'll always point you back to the word.
00:05:21
Speaker
But I had that physical feeling in that moment in that in the church service after watching a video that felt very close to home and the pastor at the end of the service asked anyone that related to the message to stand up.
00:05:35
Speaker
And before I knew what I was doing, the Lord had me on my feet. And this is a congregation of like 4,000 people. And I'm like, oh, good. I'm going to stand out in front of it everyone. Lord, like, I don't even know if anyone else is going to stand up, but here I am. Thankfully, there was other people that stood up that wanted to receive prayer as well, but I was the only one in the close area that I was sitting. So that was a little uncomforting, but at that point I was already crying and really just having an intimate moment with the Lord of knowing that this is what I'm supposed to do and to fully surrender my life to him. And that ever since then, there's been a lot of ups and downs in life and growing in my faith and then becoming a mom. As I know your listeners are well aware of, there's a lot of ups and downs of motherhood and in being a business owner.
00:06:24
Speaker
So that's really where it started. Well, you know, was there ever a season where you tried to carry it all in your own strength and like hit a wall? and What did, um, and what did God teach you in that place?
00:06:40
Speaker
Yeah.
Life Lessons in Faith
00:06:41
Speaker
The biggest season that I can speak of in that is when he honestly took, he stripped everything away from me and pointed me back to him.
00:06:52
Speaker
because i found out in that season that I was putting my identity in my work and in the things that I could do and not my identity fully in Christ. And he took me out of a job from a false accusation.
00:07:07
Speaker
And in the moment it felt very hard and personal. Like that I didn't understand why i would have this false thing said about me. And that was the first time that I was ever let go from a job. i previous of that have always been very hardworking. and it was honestly prideful and being known as a hard worker and keep going and keep going. It doesn't matter how much is thrown at you. Like you could just keep going.
00:07:31
Speaker
And that's when he took me away and it really showed me the foundation of having our life in Christ and going back to the Bible and knowing what his word says compared to what the world says and how different that really is and actually living it out compared to just reading it and being like, okay, that's good, but actually living it day to day and how it is a daily walk with him.
00:07:53
Speaker
Yeah, that is, you know, not as hard and that kind of will, it's kind of, I like to say when things like that happen, like it's kind of God's, it's God's protection. We don't see it at the time, but he is definitely protecting us. um And it's, and it's hard. How did you move forward after that?
Prayer and Friendship as Support
00:08:14
Speaker
Yeah, it honestly took a lot of prayer. There was a lot of tears. There was a lot of leaning on my, Then boyfriend, now husband, and a very close friend that continued to point me back to Christ each and every time.
00:08:30
Speaker
We laugh about it now, the close friend and I, but there was multiple times I would drive to her house bawling. I'm like, I don't know how you do this. Like, I don't know how you've lived your life with the Lord, but I am so lost and I need you to keep me straight. And that's what she did. She prayed over me and she encouraged me.
00:08:46
Speaker
She told me the hard truth when I honestly didn't want to hear it sometimes. And that has been a blessing now, um, years after it. And it was a blessing then. I just didn't see it fully. Like you were saying, we don't see the blessings of the hard season when we're in the middle of it. But now looking back, I am grateful that I walked through that to be able to see that God is who he says he is in scripture.
00:09:11
Speaker
um Yeah, i I mean, thankfully that you had those people in your life at the time to kind of carry you through. What would you say to somebody who may not have those people or the support system that is going through something difficult like that?
00:09:31
Speaker
Prayer. Prayer is so important. It might feel like God is a thousand million miles away from you right now, but i know that he's right there with you, even if it doesn't feel like he is, and that he is hearing your prayers, even if it feels like you are just talking to a blank wall over and over and over, because I've definitely been in that situation or season of feeling like the prayers just aren't going past the ceiling and they are you might not see the answer to the prayer for years to come or months down the road.
00:10:02
Speaker
But to keep going, one of my favorite verses in the Bible is Colossians 9, where it's talking about not giving up. And in that season, particularly, i had to go back and reread it over and over of not giving up and keep moving forward and whatever the Lord is calling you to And the biggest aspect that I want to circle back into is just to go to the Father and to pray to Him because He is listening.
00:10:29
Speaker
Yes. Prayer. i mean, prayer has gotten me through so, so, so much. I mean, I think we've all had those moments where we're, we're going through everything and, um and, you know, we feel like it's like the end, but if you keep, you keep going back to the Lord and you really put all your, your faith and strength into him, He really pulls you out of it. And then it's like, when you come out of it, you're like, oh God, you were there the entire time through that.
00:11:02
Speaker
And I like to say, like you were talking about um what one thing you were, you said in one of the episodes, I think you were talking about the calling on our lives. So it's never meant to be carried in our own strength. And I think it goes very well with what, what we're talking about now when you're going through that situation and When did you realize that like that you need, it's better if we're with other people and you're to put it all onto God?
Trusting God's Provision
00:11:34
Speaker
Was there any like specific moment at all during that time?
00:11:41
Speaker
There was a... Honestly, I think a few different times. One of the biggest times I can remember is being stressed financially because a little bit after being let go from that job, my husband was actually let go from his job. And that was the first time either one of us had been in that situation.
00:12:03
Speaker
and were living in an apartment and we looked at each other like okay god like how how are the bills going be paid how is this going to happen like we're not seeing how we're going to move forward but we know that you're here with us and that was when both of us are not only our own faith journey or our relationship with the Lord individually grew, but then we as a couple grew the fact that we have to have communication with each other and to be able to lean on one another.
00:12:37
Speaker
and that was the point that we both saw that God is bigger than the circumstances and that it's not by our own doing and that things will happen.
00:12:49
Speaker
in his timeline and not ours. And it might look like things are going to fall apart tomorrow, but you never know what God has planned for tomorrow. And it reminds me of scripture again of when it says not to worry for the next day, to only worry about today. And in that season, that was very much my mindset of, I need to just think about today because i if I try to think about tomorrow, it's going to freak me out.
00:13:11
Speaker
Oh my goodness. Yes. I've, I've like focusing on today and what I can control and let God take the rest. Especially I was telling Rachel before we got on the, on this call today and, um, that my, my son is, um, he is on an a adventure in Alaska with his little buddy and he's only 19. friend's 22. They're good kids, really good kids. Um, very strong in their faith and everything. And I'm like,
00:13:41
Speaker
And I was praying like this morning with the the other young kids, dad, and like, they're good kids. God has them. We have to pray. and like, we have to pray and just let God handle it. Right.
00:13:55
Speaker
um So speaking about God here, who is God to you in this season of your life right now?
00:14:08
Speaker
He's First and foremost, he's our father and a loving father, and he's the ultimate provider. And that has been the biggest thing in this season that he has taught me is that he is our ultimate provider, that the bank account isn't, that your friend isn't, that anything else in this world that would like to think that it is providing for you, it's truly all coming from the Lord because he's our he's the creator of everything.
00:14:36
Speaker
It was from him, through him, and for him, like scripture says as well. Amen. Amen. I love that. Um, now, um, I want to talk about, let's see, I'm going to go back to, you're a collegiate athlete, a D3 collegiate athlete. Can you tell us what sport, all of that, and how you think that has shaped you for who you are today?
00:15:03
Speaker
Yeah, great question. I was D3 athlete for cross country at the University of Superior, Wisconsin. I'm originally from Wisconsin. I'm now in Texas. And that in itself is the God story of how I got here. But when I was in college, i ran cross country and track. Actually, i went into freshman year of school or of college, just planning on running cross country.
00:15:27
Speaker
And it was the same coach for both cross country and track. And he talked me into running track. which I, the only way that I said I was going to do it is if I could do a mile or longer because I've never been a sprinter in my life.
00:15:41
Speaker
Well, my coach had other plans. I was the 800 relay a lot of the times. And I was like, oh, this is even shorter than what I wanted. but in that season, i was able to have really good friendships through the team.
00:15:55
Speaker
I grew up playing sports. i was a three-sport athlete in high school. I ran cross country, played basketball, and played soccer. And that has really been a big part of my life ever since I could remember of just having really, really good friendships from it and then also learning how to be disciplined and driven. And that is something that has been able to help me in every season of life after.
00:16:19
Speaker
And now, especially being a mom, that we have to have some sort of discipline for ourselves to be able to do all the different things that the Lord has called us to do in motherhood. And that is...
00:16:30
Speaker
An aspect that I never realized that has come to me so naturally until I'm coming out of college and I was like, oh, this isn't as natural, the thing for others like I thought it was just a normal thing and I've actually realized or come to realize that it's a gift that the Lord gave me of being able to be focused and disciplined throughout.
00:16:50
Speaker
Oh, yes, yes. And so I want to get into talking about being a mommy because you are, you've been a mama now for about what, 16 months, 17 months? how yeah Well, this month will be 17 months. It'll be a year and a half of July.
00:17:07
Speaker
Oh my goodness. That's so exciting. i miss that stage. How has become becoming a mother changed or deepened your walk with God?
00:17:20
Speaker
And honestly, I'd like love to say in every aspect, but the more specific answer would be to be able to see the replication of our walk with Christ with my relationship with my son and seeing how much I love my son and God loves us that much more. And to see how the the sacrificial love that God and well, I should say Jesus going on the cross did for us. And the fact that that is something that we as moms just naturally are like, well, of course I would do this for my baby, like that he's my baby. And like, of course, and this and this. And it has really played out time and time again of just seeing that this is a beautiful blessing that the Lord gave me is to be able to be a mom.
00:18:09
Speaker
And i was actually just talking with a friend earlier today about just the, the coolness for lack of better words of how we as moms can have the baby growing in our belly. And then they're, they're here. Like we honestly don't as moms, we obviously walk through the nine months of being pregnant, but like God does the heavy lifting of creating our baby in our womb and doing all of that and how much of a miracle it is and a blessing it is. And it's also really taught me to lean on God even more.
00:18:40
Speaker
Uh, because, especially in the beginning stages of newborn, you don't get much sleep as every mom knows and how that can be, ah learning curve and being a first time mom, you're like, Oh, all the things that nobody told me about, like, okay, we're just going to dive first into that. Or maybe somebody did tell you, but you didn't fully understand it until you're like, Oh, that's what my mom was talking about. Or that's what so-and-so was talking about.
00:19:03
Speaker
There was so many times that that happened for me in the first few months and just every step of the way since then. Oh my goodness, that's so funny. You know the first thing?
Motherhood and Growth
00:19:13
Speaker
When I had my first kid, I was like, oh my goodness, I have to remember to feed somebody else now. I'm like, I can barely remember remember murder to feed myself.
00:19:23
Speaker
But you know what happens? like you ah Your mother motherly instincts kick in. You're like, yes, you're going to eat it this time, this time. But you still... yeah I mean, that's a whole other topic, how moms kind of like put their self to the wayside because they're just so focused on their little ones. But um is there, what' what would you say surprised you most when you became a mom?
00:19:53
Speaker
The aspect of the first probably month or two, I felt like it was just one long, big day. because i wasn't getting obviously the full amount of sleep that I was used to beforehand.
00:20:07
Speaker
And I was like how like, how do moms do this? Like, i I heard about like the fact that babies wake up every few hours before he was here. but then I'm like, okay, but this is real life. Like how, like, it has got to like, we got to get sleep again, right? And like, I would talk to other mom friends that were a little bit, or had kids a little bit older. And then like my mom, I was like, okay, but like we get sleep. And I remember a conversation with my mom. She was like, yes, you'll get sleep again. Like, it's okay. like to Take a deep breath or you're gonna get through it And I was like, okay, I guess I will.
00:20:39
Speaker
But wait a minute. When? i my My baby's 24. Well, one one of mine is 24 and i still worry about it.
00:20:52
Speaker
I'm like, it's a whole different, like, so you know, like they wake you up to feed. And then I'm like, wait a minute. They're not waking me up. Something wrong. It's a whole...
00:21:02
Speaker
it's it's a horse It's a journey being a mom. Yeah, it really is. And I've started to understand that just in the first few months. so I can only imagine once they're older and how you've got older kids now. I know you can speak more into that than I can at this stage, but it is definitely a journey.
00:21:22
Speaker
It goes by with a blink of an eye too. Like it's so fast. Like one minute you're rocking them, seeing them lullabies. And then the next they're like graduating high school. Like how did this happen? Um, and I think what's kind of helped me is because I've decided to keep having babies over and over again. um so I have, i so I never, you know, get that empty nest feeling. So, um, but now I think I'm done, but, um, it's still, it's,
00:21:56
Speaker
It's, yeah, it's a wonderful blessing and just an experience, like this little life that God has given you and trusted you with to raise and, um you know, raise up. And um it's exciting and fun to see the different milestones they reach and like how they grow into God's word too. um and just seeing that, i I love it. I love it. would not, i can't imagine my life any other way.
00:22:31
Speaker
You know, um have you ever experienced a moment when you wondered whether becoming a mom that you needed to set aside your business and your dreams and calling? Like, did you ever think like, like, maybe I shouldn't do this and just focus on my my little one?
00:22:50
Speaker
Yeah, honestly, that's been something that I've gone back and forth with multiple times over the timeframe that my son's been here, because that it's definitely ah job in itself of being a mom. And the aspect when women say, oh, I'm just a mom, like i want to go up and gently shake you and say, no, if there's no just like you do so many great things. It's not not any smaller. So if there is any stay at home moms or moms that are quote unquote, just doing that, I really want to take the just out of your vocabulary because there's so many different aspects of being a mom, the chauffeur aspect, the taking care of them, all the things that we already know.
00:23:31
Speaker
And that was something that I was really leaning into and thinking of like, okay, Lord, I do feel that the, the vision that I was given or the ideas was from the Lord of working with other moms, but then like, okay, well, how am I supposed to do that in this capacity?
00:23:49
Speaker
And that's when he really showed me again, that it's not by my strength, it's by his and leaning on him and surrendering and allowing him to take it instead of just taking it back. Uh, because that is another visual aspect that I think of in surrender is like, we're like a little kid giving our blankie away, but we want to take the blankie back.
00:24:13
Speaker
And then a way that the Lord has taught me of like, okay, you need to give me the blankie, actually give it over. and I'm like, but I just want the little corner word. Like I want this control. And that has taught me time and time again, that we can't do that. Like if we're going to surrender, we have to fully give it to them and let him lead. And that has been something that has helped me in the coaching aspect. I will definitely be the first one to say it's not,
00:24:39
Speaker
that does not look perfect on my end. I actually, before recording, I put an Instagram story up of saying like what the camera will see compared to what the camera won't see. I'm currently recording in my bedroom.
00:24:53
Speaker
Behind me is just the pretty wall. In front of me is all of the clutter. And just the aspect that that's really what motherhood and business can be like is that what we show isn't the whole picture, isn't every little aspect. You're not seeing the baby crying or the fact that we have to listen to a call while we're feeding baby or while we're having baby on our lap because he doesn't wanna do anything else in this moment. And you could feel like a horrible mom if baby's crying. Like you don't ever see the aspects when it it's a lot in in this season, but it's also a blessing to be busy from something that we've prayed about before. And that was an aspect that I was actually just reminded of from my mentor, of that it's a blessing to be tired from something that we used to pray for.
00:25:43
Speaker
Yes. Oh, yes. That is so, I got goosebumps. You said that like, it is a blessing to be tired for something we prayed for. Absolutely. Now, what would you say to the mom who may be like secretly tired?
00:25:59
Speaker
I mean, she like deeply loves her children. She loves being home with her children, but like quietly she's feeling maybe some guilt because she still desires to build something or has a feeling that she's called for something more. What what would you tell her? Yeah. Great question.
Coping with Guilt in Motherhood
00:26:20
Speaker
The first thing i would tell her is that she is so very loved by the creator of everything that we can't even fathom how much that you are loved by him and that he is with you in every aspect.
00:26:35
Speaker
And to you say the the guilt that she's having to say that out loud, to actually verbally say it out loud so she can process it and hear it because could almost promise the mom that it's a lie from the enemy.
00:26:54
Speaker
of whatever that guilt is and that mom guilt is it usually stems from a lie. There could be an aspect that the Lord is showing you of moving in a different direction. But most of the time when I talk to other moms, they're like, oh, I felt guilty because of this and this and this sounds like that doesn't sound like it's coming from the Lord at all. So I just want to encourage the mom to discern if it's coming from the ah Coming from the enemy or coming from God himself, because that is ah something that's very important to be able to discern from. And then if it is coming from the Lord and that you do feel that he's telling you to move forward in a business or in an idea to take that first step, do not.
00:27:37
Speaker
want to take the next 50 steps. If God is giving you the first step to focus on that first step, and it might not look planned out the way that you wanted to, but to take that first step of obedience and the Lord will show you the rest.
00:27:50
Speaker
Yes. Yes. It may be scary, but do it. Just take that first step. You know, talking about, you talk about a lot about a rhythm in motherhood and business instead of chasing balance.
Finding Life Rhythms
00:28:04
Speaker
What, what's the difference between those two?
00:28:08
Speaker
Yeah, great question. So in balance, it would mean fifty fifty of if you were to look at like a balancing scale, the weight would be evenly distributed. As in motherhood, I truly believe that that is impossible. We can't have even weight on every single aspect in our day-to-day lives, meaning that you can't give equal amount of time and energy to baby as that you can in a business in the day. Some days it might be more motherhood focused in the fact that you're going to be on a field trip with your kids when they're older and doing things in more in being mom. And then the next day you could be in back-to-back Zoom meetings. And then that
00:28:50
Speaker
is more of a rhythm in your life of, okay, Mondays are more being mom and doing all the things with kids. Tuesdays are more of, okay, I'm more business orientated. And that's when I have like my zoom meetings or whatever it could look like. And it will look different in each different seasons of life, because obviously like if you were to look at both Laura and I, like I have a younger baby. So that's takes more of the physical taking care of them when you have obviously older kids so you don't have to like change diapers anymore anything like that but there is still a capacity of being mom it just looks different in every season you know um that that's a good perspective so um what would you um why would you Let me rephrase that and let me think about how I wanted to ask this. um
00:29:41
Speaker
Why do you think like the idea of a perfect balance can create so much frustration or shame for moms?
00:29:50
Speaker
I honestly think it points us to compare ourselves to other moms out there. And then we looked on social media and I go and say, oh my goodness, Laura's got it all figured out because she's a mom of this many kids and a business owner. And like, look, and she's got the pink background and it's just beautiful. And then look at my background. It looks horrible. Or look at this. Like I'm not doing the same amount that she is when, like I mentioned earlier, what we show on specifically social media is just a sliver of our day to day.
00:30:20
Speaker
that it's not the full picture. And then also having the balance in thinking that you have to do 102 things in one day when we physically as humans cannot do that. Again, to go back into the Lord's strength and not our own because we physically can't be pulled in that many directions. And that I think is what the balance can kind of give the illusion of of that we can do it all.
00:30:48
Speaker
Mm. Yes. Yes. And ah yeah. And social media and everyone's highlight reel is, is, uh, that can be ah a little much for, you know, moms, especially if you're a new mom and you're trying to do a business too. And you're like, wait a minute, but I don't have what she has yet. I need all of this. And like you said, you don't. And if you, um, rely all on God, um And find that not perfect balance. I almost said the wrong word. The rhythm, as you say, and I love that. i love that instead of chasing balance. I absolutely love that. So what would a healthy Christ-centered rhythm look like?
Organizing Life with Faith
00:31:34
Speaker
is Well, what does it look like in your life, I should say? Yeah. Right now, it looks like watching what I commit my time to and putting it on the calendar right away. So I know that I'm not over committing because I know that this season of having a little one, isn't going to last forever. And i very much want to cherish that time and not over commit on business things and to be very um cautious and to be listening to the Lord of what he's actually calling me to use my time with wisely in this season. knowing that I have little, little ones and possibly in the future, more little ones. Uh, that's definitely something that I've always thought I was going to be a mom of more than one kiddo. So it's just a matter of when on that capacity. Um, I love that.
00:32:32
Speaker
yeah Um, you no, I, I totally understand that. and there was, um, let's say, um Yeah, I mean, it's kind of like finding your own, i guess, finding, you know, definitely making time for like my my struggle. I'll go back to like my when I was trying to in the beginning when I was having kids um to put God first. Like I had to realize I need to get up early. i had to like develop a routine and that didn't happen like over
00:33:06
Speaker
night that was like a very hard lesson learned that I have you know I have to get up early if I want to any time you know spend time with God I was fit it in the nuggets that I could but make it a priority if I do it the first thing in the morning i can get it done and I have that me time whereas if I didn't it was kind of all over the place I just didn't have that rhythm set um oh You talk also about like not hustling. How ah how do you know when you're operating spirit-led versus like slipping back into that hustle culture and like trying to find balance when you don't want balance, right? Yeah.
00:33:56
Speaker
Yeah, great question. The biggest indicator is when I feel stressed or feel short, tempered towards my husband. Uh, he'll be the first one to tell me, be like, are we doing things that the Lord wants us to do? Or are we trying to do what Rachel wants to do? And that's been a good check-in that we've done or that he's done for me. And it isn't it always great to hear in the moment. Cause I'm like, no, I'm doing this and this. I'm like, oh no, maybe I'm not. Maybe I am stressed out. Okay. i need to take a step back. Uh, indicator has been
00:34:31
Speaker
trying to put too much on the schedule or too much in a period of time when, especially now in the season of my son taking um two naps during the day, I've caught myself of being like, well, how much can I shove in the nap time? Like, I don't know how long he's gonna be napping. I'm like, what about this and this and this? And I'm like, okay, take a deep breath, one, because if you panic, you're not gonna get anything done. And just remembering to pray in that moment too.
00:34:58
Speaker
And also to go into what you were saying of finding a rhythm of being in the word or with the Lord before um kiddos get up. I just want to speak into that. If there's moms listening that maybe felt shame. when we were talking about that of like, oh, I don't do that and it doesn't look perfect and this and that, that it can look different one season to season as the kids grow there. But then it is also where it doesn't have to be this big elaborate, like Instagram worthy time. Like it can be a 10 minute window of,
00:35:29
Speaker
okay, Lord, I want to sit and just hear you, or I'm going pray specifically to you, or I'm going to read just a paragraph of scripture. Like it doesn't have to be this beautiful, glorious thing that he just wants to spend time with us. And I know for myself specifically, if I don't spend that first time,
00:35:48
Speaker
either 10 minutes or hour, whatever it looks like day to day with him that my whole day feels completely off. And I just, I feel like I'm missing something the entire day. And it's because I didn't go to him first.
00:36:01
Speaker
ah Yes, yes. And I love how you pointed that out because Yeah, and it's, believe me, my time with the Lord is never perfect. Like it is messy sometimes. And I love that you you shared that. um And how would how do you protect your daily time in the Word when, like you were saying, and your schedule is so unpredictable and the baby or the baby needs you and your to-do list feels like it's like endless or whatever? Like, how do you do that?
00:36:34
Speaker
Yeah, the biggest thing that has helped the most is getting up usually an hour before my son is up. So i try to be up by 5 a.m. m And the reason I say try is this actually this whole last week has been a little bit of a struggle, but usually I'm able to get up with an alarm. And I've noticed that just that hour of and sometimes I'm not even reading scripture. I'm just sitting there and I can hear the Lord, or I'm just sitting and enjoying my cup of coffee and enjoying the peace of the morning. that I've always been a morning person, even before becoming a mom. So that part has been helpful.
00:37:10
Speaker
But then also on the flip side of that, there has been mornings that either I've slept in not meaning to, or he's gotten up earlier than what I thought he would. And right away, when he gets up earlier, I'm like, dang it, I lost my time. But then I'm like, no, that's okay. Like, it this was meant to be the Lord's got something else planned. And In those mornings, I've actually been able to either read scripture to him and that's been a really cool experience, or i know that he'll see me being in scripture. And that is something that I am excited for him to grow up seeing because then I'm hoping that that will lead him to wanting to lead scripture when he's older. So it is okay for our kids to see us in scripture. It's actually really good for that. Um, and just encourage other their moms for that too.
00:37:58
Speaker
Oh yeah. And then also if you're reading it to him, it's also good for his development too. So not only like spiritually, but also, you know, within educational as well. oh that's a good like You know, yeah. um Helps with, vert ah ah oh my goodness, my words are so hard today for me. and I've been up super early.
00:38:24
Speaker
but ah Like for vocabulary, there's the word. And ah like, okay, so how do you do all of that whenever, like, so keep that intimacy with God?
00:38:36
Speaker
When, when it is like loud, you know, the baby's crying, you know, maybe your your schedule's chaotic, like, how do you keep that?
00:38:49
Speaker
Honestly, there has been some moments where my flesh is definitely taking over and I have, either gotten upset or done something I, or just gotten upset, I should say in that, and that's not how I want to lead moms to do, but I do want to share that. and the fact that we're human, we do make mistakes. We can go back and repent or, and say sorry to the Lord for not going to him and how I've done it in the past and continue to is honestly taking a deep breath.
00:39:19
Speaker
And a it's, I've been told it's called a breath prayer by others and just taking a deep breath in and going, okay, Lord, I'm listening. going to take this moment and try not to lose it and to bring it back to you and give this moment to you. and that's honestly things that I've told myself in chaotic moments when baby was going in the high chair wanting food and I'm cooking dinner and my husband's not home yet. That's usually the time that I've become the most stressed. I'm like, okay, we're at the end of the day, he's almost home and I'm almost going to have
00:39:54
Speaker
help with baby, but then something else happens and I'm like, I just don't want to do it anymore, Lord. And like, I will just talk and I probably look like a crazy person in my kitchen sometimes because I'm just talking to like the wall, but I'm actually talking to God.
00:40:09
Speaker
And i will definitely recommend moms to look like the crazy person and talk out loud to the Lord because he will respond in whatever way that you need him I love that. I'm guilty of that too. Yeah.
00:40:22
Speaker
I was like, mom, you okay? I was like, yes, just having a conversation with God. um Speaking of communicating is one of the lessons that you wanted to kind of share with moms and what is a conversation or what conversation do women need to be willing to have with their spouses, families, or support systems as they build businesses?
Communication and Community Support
00:40:50
Speaker
Or it should be, um yeah.
00:40:54
Speaker
Oh, no, you're good. Okay, I was like making sure I was like, did that come off clear? Did I say that right? It went right in my head. It's been multiple times that I've said something like that. um But the biggest thing that I would say is to communicate your schedule and the needs that you need in this season be If it is your spouse, like your husband, the one that you're living in the same household with, that is the number one person that I would say talk to specifically. And then if you don't have that, or if you are getting help from say your parents are like outside sources to also communicate the schedule and what,
00:41:35
Speaker
the day-to-day really looks like for you and baby, because if they don't know that, then it's harder for them to be able to help you and to be able to know when to help and how to help. The other aspect that I would recommend moms doing is to be okay with asking for help. And I know that that is, we could probably do a whole other podcast episode just on that particular topic, because I know it's a lot easier said than done.
00:42:01
Speaker
And anyone that personally knows me that would be listening to this would be like, oh, really, Rachel, you going listen to your own advice? Because I've definitely been the one to be like, no, I got it. Everything's fine. And then it all falls apart. And I'm like, I should have asked for your help from the beginning. Okay. Yes. Yes.
00:42:18
Speaker
I want to be the encourager of, uh, for other moms to ask the help first before it falls apart or before you feel like you need to have it all figured out by yourself. Amen. Yes. And, you know, speaking of asking for help, there was, um you know, you also talk about community and like, you know, moms need a community. What kind of community should a mom look for if she wants relationships that strengthen her faith, her confidence, her leadership and help, you know, sometimes with the with the little ones too in Christ, you know, whenever you need it, right?
00:42:56
Speaker
Yeah, no, that's another awesome question because it is a very important aspect to the beginning stages of being a mom. And it's something to go back to scripture. God tells us all the time not to be by ourselves and to have others around us.
00:43:11
Speaker
And the biggest thing that i would emphasize there is to make sure that you're finding other women that are following the Lord. And when I say following Lord, I mean truly following and having a relationship with the Lord and not just putting it in their Instagram bio saying that they're a believer to actually see the fruits of their walk with the Lord, to know that you are discerning that friendship and to know that you're walking with somebody that can pray for you, that can walk hand in hand.
00:43:41
Speaker
And that is something that I have been able to have here locally. And then I'm also building it online as well through a free Facebook group that I am being very cautious of who I let in because I know that that community in such a raw, vulnerable season of life is very much needed. And I want to be able to have a safe,
00:44:05
Speaker
encouraging space for moms to come on and share the the ins and outs of what's going on in the beginning stages of being a mom because it's not all sunshine and rainbows. Some mornings you're like, yeah, this is great. I'm a new mom and I love it.
00:44:18
Speaker
Other mornings you're like, I haven't showered in like three days. i don't know when the last time is I ate I maybe got an hour of sleep last night. Like there's just things that can add up and I want to be able to be there and to have a community of other women that understand that they're not going to point fingers at you, but they're going to say, no, look, you're, you're not a crazy person. Like I understand that. And I see you in it.
00:44:40
Speaker
And again, to go back to the foundation of having Christ at the the foundation of it all is the number one thing that I always want to recommend. That is so real too. ah All of that. um And what would you say to the mama who feels maybe she's buried in the guilt right now? Like she's failing at her faith, failing at motherhood, or failing at it all in her opinion.
00:45:11
Speaker
that is a heavy question because I have definitely been there. Yes, same. And when you're in the middle of it, it feels extremely heavy and that like there could be no end out of it. And the number one thing that I do want to say to the mama that's feeling this is that there isn't out of it and to to reach out to the Lord first and to be ah open and honest with them in prayer of saying that this is where you're at and this is how you feel and to let him reveal
00:45:46
Speaker
things that he wants you to work on in this season, because there could be something more there that he's trying to show you.
Encouragement for Overwhelmed Moms
00:45:52
Speaker
And then the second thing that I would recommend is to reach out to a trusted person that you know is a trusted friend or a person.
00:46:01
Speaker
And if you don't have that, because I know there's a lot of moms out there now in society overall that are being mom by themselves. I will say this is an open invitation. Feel free to reach out to my Instagram or any way of connecting with me and tell me where you're at in that season, because I will pray over you and I will give you as much encouragement as I can via messenger, because that is a very scary spot. And that is a spot that the enemy would love for us to stay in because he knows once we're isolated that we will start listening to the lies and believing the lies. and I want to be able to come in and share the truth and the love of Christ to show you that that's not um the end all be all.
00:46:45
Speaker
Or I should say not the end all be all of bleeding the lies. The Lord is where is the good spot to be. What do you, what do you, what is the one message you believe more moms need to hear right now?
00:47:05
Speaker
That you're not alone and raising the next generation of disciples is extremely important. And the Lord isn't asking you to do that by yourself. He's walking with us each step of the way.
00:47:18
Speaker
And it's actually pointed out in the Great Commission. When we go out and share the gospel as the Great Commission says that he is with us, um,
00:47:31
Speaker
And that it's important that he's with us and it's important and that we lean on him and remember that he's always with us.
00:47:40
Speaker
I love that. um
00:47:44
Speaker
Now tell us about the women you you serve and, and how you walk with them from overwhelmed to clarity and confidence. Yeah.
00:47:57
Speaker
Yeah. So I serve first time work from home entrepreneur mamas that know they have the vision of having the business and being mom at the same time and are in that spot of, oh my goodness gracious, I'm actually doing this now. How do I do this, Rachel? How do I not go off the deep end? And truly want to come and walk alongside of you hand in hand through Zoom sessions, just like how Laura and I are speaking now to be able to not give you a bunch of to-dos, but to give you a space to process and to truly lean into the Lord and have that quiet moment to hear Him and or process through things that He's already showed you. Because I know first-time moms, they don't need another to-do list. There's already
00:48:47
Speaker
ah thousand and two different things that we're thinking of and or the latest and greatest greatest gadget that the industry you just told us we need to buy when half the time we don't need to buy all those things and i will be one of the first new time moms to say that because there was a lot of different things that i just didn't need that i thought i did um but my goal in that is to be able to point them ultimately back to the lord and to show them that it is it's our duty as moms to point our kids back to Christ.
00:49:19
Speaker
And at the end of the day, that is, our kids are the only ones that we can take with us to heaven. Like we cannot take anything from this world other than our kids with us to heaven and to be able to confidently show our relationship with the Lord to our kids while also still building a business because we can build the business to point back to Christ and to have everything point back to Christ because the one thing that I can promise that moms will be able to walk away after working with me is that you're never going to be able to look at motherhood and business the same way without seeing God at the center of it because every time I talk with anybody I'm going to point you back to him because he's the one that it's all for.
00:50:05
Speaker
of I love that. Yes. And you have actually something kind of something exciting coming up, right? You have a free life masterclass. Is that right? It's the Raised on Truth Mastermind.
00:50:19
Speaker
Yeah, i am starting a new series. It's called Raised on Truth Mastermind. and it's on June sixteenth I believe, now that I'm questioning dates in my mind. But I will make sure that we have the right one underneath.
00:50:33
Speaker
And the goal in that is to be able to bring in guest speakers that will help build confidence in the for new time moms and to give clarity in ways that we're walking with our children. So this first month, it's all going to be about nutrition and actually pulling back the curtain of what the industry lies are of nutrition and what to get for your babies going into the grocery store and confidently going into the grocery store instead of just being in a frantic of questioning everything on the aisles anymore because I have definitely been in that aspect now that I am feeding another human because when you're just feeding yourself you're like oh yeah I know this might not be the healthiest but like I want to eat that or this or that but when you're feeding your baby to me it's been a whole and nother aspect of like
00:51:21
Speaker
Okay, what's actually in this? Can i read this label or know what this item is going in to the food? And I have a guest speaker, Coach Ken coming in. He's a weight loss mastery coach, and he has a lot of experience in knowing what's actually in the foods and the nutrition and being able to set the moms up at a foundational level from the beginning of the baby's life, instead of feeling guilty or that you're giving your baby something that isn't useful in nutrition wise.
'Raised on Truth' Mastermind Introduction
00:51:54
Speaker
And then each month, it'll be a different guest speaker that will have different aspects of walking with the Lord while raising our babies. So next month is going to be more of talking to an older mom mom, actually, that's already been in the new season and how she pointed her kids back to Christ while they were growing up.
00:52:13
Speaker
So I'm really excited for it. And I cannot wait to meet the moms that come. That is so exciting. And for those of you that are listening, I'll include, um all the deets, all the information in the show notes as well. And, um, Rachel, this, this show is all about built on the belief that mamas were made to lead and made for more. So I have to ask you the question that I ask all my guests is what does it, what does being a mama who leads mean to you?
00:52:51
Speaker
It means
00:52:54
Speaker
loving, loving my baby, honestly, and leading him in faith and in life and knowing that he is loved by not only me, but the Lord and walking that as well.
00:53:10
Speaker
I absolutely love that. Um, for, Before we close, um would you share um where everyone can find you and in tune into your podcast as well and look for any of your coaching programs or work with you further as well?
00:53:31
Speaker
Yeah, thank you for that. So first things first, you can find me on socials. I am mostly on Instagram at Rachel Fun Nelson. It's my name with fun in the middle of it.
00:53:42
Speaker
And that is where you can save the most up to date in all the things going on with my coaching programs in the free Facebook community that I'm building. And then I'm also building out what will be a paid version of the community to go a little bit deeper and have more conversations like this actually to be one-on-one and to grow more with the moms.
00:54:04
Speaker
Another area that you can connect with me is my website and I know that Laura will have all the links to that in the show notes as well, and you can schedule a one on one call with me is it has felt like it would be a really good connection after listening to this conversation of seeing what.
00:54:21
Speaker
Being a client of mine would look like, I would love to have that conversation to see if that's where the Lord is pointing you to in this season. They definitely don't want you to walk in the first steps of motherhood alone. Um, that is something that has been near near to my heart ever since becoming a mom.
00:54:38
Speaker
And there was going to be another aspect that, oh, about the podcast. That's what it was. So like Laura mentioned earlier, I have a show called This Is Me Attitude Podcast. I am no longer producing episodes for it but it's still all out there for you to listen to. There's 150 episodes, though it was honestly very hard closing producing more episodes for it. But the Lord told me last year that it was time to set that aside.
00:55:06
Speaker
But he also did say that I could have it open for but people to listen to. And my ultimate goal in the overall show, at least the second half of the show, I should say, because throughout the whole show is when I was growing with the Lord, the to point people back to him and to show that entrepreneurship can lead back to Christ as well. And there is a ton of different conversations I've had on there with guest speakers that you get to see the the real parts of being mom, of being a business owner and all the parts in between. So I would definitely love for anyone, if you like this conversation to go back and listen to that as well.
00:55:41
Speaker
And I can answer any questions from that through social media or on my website. Wonderful. Thank you, Rachel. One of the most powerful themes I've heard throughout this conversation has been that moms do not have to prove their strength by carrying everything alone.
Embracing a Full Life
00:56:01
Speaker
There is a difference between living a full life and living an overwhelmed life. A full life can still have peace, still have boundaries, and still have room for God's voice. And a full life can include motherhood and business as well without sacrificing all the things that matter most. But we have to release the pressure to do everything perfectly.
00:56:24
Speaker
or balanced, as Rachel says. so we have to stop believing we are falling behind just simply because our pace looks different in the season. And before we close, I want to ask you one final question. And that is, um would you speak a final word straight from your heart over the mamas listening here?
00:56:47
Speaker
Overall, that I know I've mentioned this multiple times, but I feel like to say it again, that you truly are not alone. And I, and that I will actually read scripture because it might take me a minute to find it, but that leads me to, oh there it is. Okay. So this is in Matthew 28 and it is the great commission. It's verse 19. And it so says, go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the father and of the son and of the Holy spirit.
00:57:18
Speaker
teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you. And remember, i am with you always to the end of the age. And the thing that I truly believe that the Lord is telling me to share with the mamas to end our great conversation is the part of saying, i am with you always. That is God himself talking specifically to us as disciples, that he is with us when we are in motherhood. He is with us in when we go and talk about our faith to others, even though it's scary and sometimes awkward and just sometimes very weird talking to new people about faith, but he himself is with us. So I just want to end that there.
00:57:58
Speaker
I love that. Thank you so much for sharing that. This conversation has been absolutely wonderful. Just thank you so much, Rachel. I appreciate it. And i know our listeners have gotten value out of it. And if you have, would you please, please, please share it to another mama who needs to hear it? as well. And just want to remind you, you were never meant to hustle your way into your calling. You were made to surrender into it. The home you're building and the work that he's placed in your hands are not in competition, that they're both holy ground when God is at the center. So take a breath, release the striving and let him carry what was never yours to carry alone. And please, please, please go connect with Rachel over at paperbell.me slash Rachel dash Nelson. And her Instagram is at Rachel fun Nelson. And i will have all of that for you in the show notes as well. And goal listen to a podcast. This is me attitude podcast. I love the name by the way. Um, it is phenomenal. I've been listening to it and just incredible guests she has on there as well. And, um, do not miss her free raised on the truth mastermind starting on June 16th.
00:59:18
Speaker
And again, all the details will be in the show notes as well. And, um, as always, thank you so much. And, mamas, please keep leading, keep growing and keep believing in what is possible. And I'll see you next time.
00:59:34
Speaker
You've been listening to Mamas Who Lead with Laura Carafino. Thank you for joining us on this journey today. Each episode, each story, and every piece of advice we share is a step towards building a community of empowered, resilient, and inspiring Mama leaders, just like you.
00:59:53
Speaker
Remember leadership isn't just about the title or the workplace. It's about how we navigate our lives, uplift those around us and pave the way for future generations. As we close today's episode, I encourage you to carry forward the insights and inspiration you've gained, apply them to your life, share them with your tribe and continue to lead with heart and purpose.
01:00:14
Speaker
For more empowering stories, strategies, and support, make sure you subscribe to Mamas Who Lead on your favorite podcast platform. And don't forget to follow us on social media for behind the scenes content, community discussions, and much more. Until we meet again, keep embracing your unique journey of leadership and motherhood. You are capable, you are powerful, and you are exactly where you're meant to be.
01:00:39
Speaker
Lead on Mamas.